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Renee9485 Archive

View 3 posts and 59 comments by Renee9485 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

“Is she dead weight? Should I run a business all day, come home exhausted, then have to deal with her fuckin nonsense?!” Sounds like dead weight to me. No, you shouldn’t have to do that. If she’s not neutral at best in her ability to exist in your life, send her packing. Chances are, accountability still won’t compute in her brain. Chalk it up as a lesson. Learn some good boundary setting for the next one (if there is one) and worry about yourself. This bitch is in a destructo spiral and will br…
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/26 03:19 PM
1

Sorry I didn’t catch this sooner. Life is….NORMAL. Ultimately better than normal but in summary, that’s the best word to describe it. The kids are thriving, I’m thriving and things are just easier. Co-Parenting sucked, but that’s because doing anything with her sucked. Ultimately she’s out of the picture now and I (we, meaning me and my mentally stable fiancée) have full custody of the kids. It took a lot of time, money, patience and growth, but well worth it. I didn’t do it in the name of happi…
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/24 11:01 PM
1

It’s definitely some power dynamic issue. Her mom probably did it to her dad. It’s dysfunctional as hell and nobody should do it. I realized over time that this woman I married had plans and expectations far varied from what I was willing to provide FOR her. Now she’s alone and washed up, the last drops of golden uterus feminist pride keeping her from making any positive changes for herself. The woman who said she could “do it all herself” is literally doing it all herself and finding there isn’…
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/24 03:09 AM
2

Plenty of support out there brother. Don't fall into the fallacy of being all alone.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 10:40 AM
9

Only when the kids aren’t around, her name is cunt face. Then there are people who think co-parenting with this surrogate uterus is achievable. Lest they forget I filed for divorce due to her unreasonable demeanor. I too want my last name back…she’s publicly polluted it to the point that I’m embarrassed for my kids.
/r/Divorce_Men04/05/23 05:07 PM
2

So familiar buddy, good luck! Once I got rid of emotion, the only logical thing to do was leave. Even when I get angry, it's simply utilitarian, not emotional anymore. As it's been said in here more than once, document and record everything. All communicating should be done in writing. Show me something worth respecting and I'm sure I'll change my mind. But at this point after all the wreckage and how many times I've been back -bitten, we are a LONG way away from an iota of true respect. I don't…
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/23 04:44 PM
7

My God do I ever...Three positive drug tests were wrong. The hair follicle test though...lets not talk about that. She has prescriptions for Adderall and the meth showing up in the tests could not have been possible. Even though everyone I talk to in town calls her a tweaker. She doesn't know this guy or that guy or that girl, even though my PI has pictures to prove it. She's got emergency after emergency and that's why she can't let children and youth services in her house. You name it man I'm …
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/23 04:34 PM
3

I wouldn't say it's a legal question. We're going through some custody issues right now and I guess her degenerate attorney thought this would be a great question since she doesn't have anything else to press upon. I'm probably going to hear at the next hearing how my lack of respect for her effects my kids. Which I play the "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything" card in front of my kids therefore it has little merit. Her attorney is allllll about agitating. I honestly don'…
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/23 04:25 PM
4

Thank God, not mine. I struggle to even look mine in the face. Her attorney asked me in court the other day if I have any respect for my ex anymore. I answered with a flat out "NO". This woman has physically and mentally reduced herself to such a vile human being, the only thing I can find respect for is the fact that she had a working uterus and I didn't. I couldn't imagine trying to ram her again. ::Puke:: I can't even agree on a pediatrician with her anymore she's such a degenerate let alone …
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/23 02:42 PM
1

This!
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/23 08:52 PM
1

Realistically, just make sure it’s someone good for your kids. It’s like any other dude entering their lives as a coach, mentor or whatever. Except this one is occupying your old headache, which is beneficial for you. The happier she is, the less miserable she should be inclined to try and make you.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/23 12:52 PM
6

It’s better that guy than me.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/23 04:57 PM
1

Joint legal custody or something of that nature should afford say in major decisions. If OP and his are both of sound mind, it's obviously better for two people to be making major decisions for this kids sake. That way neither of them can make willy nilly decisions should somebody go off the rails. My ex was primary but I still had legal precedence, she pulled my oldest out of school and I went into court with torches and pitch forks and got it rectified as she was in contempt for not abiding by…
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 05:33 PM
2

I understand man! When I left I was exhausted, mildly hopeless and just trainwrecked and didn’t want to deal with her anymore. Now it’s a hatred…and I get the hint that her attorney just want to fire me up and empty my pockets. She’s already lost custody at this point but now she has her attorney barking up my tree for things like me lacking Dr appointment details….though my ex hasn’t had the kids to the pediatrician in 4 years and I didn’t know they were almost discharged from school because of…
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/23 03:39 PM
1

Yes, document EVERYYYYTHING. Ya never know what you might need. I’m digging through 14 years of stuff right now to prove my ex has ALWAYS had an unacknowledged drug abuse problem that I thought would never rear it’s ugly head and involve the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/23 07:08 PM
2

What she means to say is “If you don’t give it to me, I will hurt your son”.
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/23 06:59 PM
2

I've heard the term Alien Abduction Plan but I hadn't delved into it's details. Thank you for that! I agree with the 100% theory...Especially considering the divorce was because two people couldn't get along for whatever reason. I think the pushed theory of co-parenting is a bit of hogwash to be honest. Sure you can both be parents, but agreeing on plans like extracurriculars when you both think each-other suck is a huge farce. Imagine the confusion in your kids mind seeing you two get along so …
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/23 05:12 PM
2

I almost have to second this. My ex has been banging meth up her nose for a loooooong time now. It took hell and high water to get the court to see what a shit bag she is. It took uncovering a million lies and several failed drug tests to get them to see what her real problem is while she used all this feelings based wah wah story shit to cover for her lack of integrity. Regardless, with the right judge, the back-up data can sure help. You MUST keep records of damn near everything.....and I mean…
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/23 03:45 PM
2

Good thing I didn't have my coffee cup up to my mouth when I read this...I'd have spit it all over my computer.... So was my ex-wife...Explains why the kids hadn't gone for vaccinations or to see the pediatrician or dentist for four years post divorce. She took the "stay at home" part waaaaay to seriously. I now have full custody of my three kids plus temporary custody of her fourth child from another guy. Get rid of this thing and save another female, meaning your daughter, from the depths of t…
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/23 04:59 PM
1

The Methacissist
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/23 04:24 AM
1

Well Boys....She done dug her hole...I just supplied the shovel. Repeated emergency custody hearings, positive drug screenings and her insurmountable lies.....the judge seen through the bullshit and and gave me primary custody!
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/23 01:35 PM
3

Thankfully I resolved with most of this before I left. The shame kept me around. It wasn't until I got over this that I was able to pull the plug on the marriage. Then once the shame was gone and the papers were filed, the regret wasn't an option anymore. A little bit hung around after it was over, but it was more-so because I worried about what I did to my kids. But, they're mostly good, barring things that are out of my control. However, the DISILLUSIONMENT! What a great word to break out ther…
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 10:16 PM
10

Not that I’ve ever seen buddy, especially if they got a fresh sausage. Totally taints them..
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 02:58 AM
1

This post and it’s replies are 🔥! Get at it OP! Not everyone on here knows it all but there’s a lot of common themes here, listen up and giddy-up! Best of luck to you and don’t be a stranger, you’ll need the support.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/22 04:39 PM
1

Go see my horror story....https://www.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/zlxg6c/venting_and_sharing_the_trainwreck_if_it_doesnt/ ​ It sounds like everyone is in a good spot. Be thankful that she hopefully found a decent guy to be with and above all else make sure your kids are treated well. Life goes on and I'm glad to see it doesn't bother you. Ultimately it shouldn't. Godspeed brother!
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/22 11:47 PM
7

I think you have the wrong board. See if there is a board for "I got stiffed by a shitbag".
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/22 11:42 PM
1

Same. Eventually rekindled a high school flame who was in the same divorce boat as me…..not until after I dodged an “out the gate bullet” though.
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/22 08:03 PM
1

Too soon…like a week after I moved out…the ink wasn’t even dry on my divorce application. I was a drunken mess and she was a train wreck. Thankfully she outed herself fast. In some odd way she seemed to shine a light on the cheating back life my ex had that I always wondered about. Quite sure they were a lot alike.
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/22 08:00 PM
1

So I've decided that I'm going to start talking a bit to my oldest boy, who is struggling the most. I ironically have my parents divorce to reference and how messed up of a kid I became....as if tweens/teens aren't already screwed up enough, we have this to deal with. I'm levying thing's I had experienced as a kid to essentially insinuate that his mother has serious issues. It's a slow and arduous path, but this definitely helped me get some perspective. Thanks guys!
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/22 07:31 PM
1

I give mine $20k a year and she still wants me to take the kids more. 50/50 custody. I hit my ceiling a long time ago. My ceiling is "I give you squat more, you walk away and you give me the kids so I don't have to keep spending more money trying to straighten them out from you screwing them up".
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/22 07:24 PM
1

Good for you brother! I am shocked as hell she admitted it! It gets easier as time goes by. For me it actually got to the point we are now where I can no longer wait to get rid of her unless she miraculously does a complete 180. Even then, reconciliation is out of the question. My advice is to keep her away and don't turn back. I've seen many women not truly change their behavior, especially after they reignited that taste of fresh meat.
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/22 07:18 PM
6

This! Death isn't only physical...... Have a funeral and move on. Consider hiring a high power attorney and a priest to shield you from the demon that now lives in that beautiful body. Get your affairs in order and protect your kids. Everybody dies, it's just harder when people do it and you have to watch their old body move around for 20 more years. And for the sake of yourself and your children, seek out support for you and them. Be it this board, a therapist, a support group.....or all of the…
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/22 07:07 PM
1

Great approach, I love it! I might have to drill in on this one next!
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/22 03:29 PM
1

My attorney has advised me not to approach domestic relations for some reason. Although I have been thinking about doing it myself so that I have one more thing "hands off"...any input?
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/22 07:14 PM
1

Agreed, set a deadline. My ex personally texted me, sob storying for a continuance on something because the judge wouldn't let her request a second one. I said tough tittes, we are getting this done and sure enough she managed to show up. Guess she wasn't too tied up after all.
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/22 06:25 PM
2

If you're lucky. My slimy ex just keeps getting away with everything. Violation after violation just keeps getting dismissed or excused.
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/22 04:30 PM
3

I'm four years out and I can't really say it has gotten any better. It gets good for a bit, then some bad stuff goes down again that requires me to drop thousands more. This comes from the woman who said "We could have done this out of court". We could have if we had done it her way the entire time but no, after what I went through with her during marriage, it was my turn. I'm losing money but battle by battle I'm winning what has become a war. She's now moved on to ruining our children as I hav…
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/22 04:12 PM
1

It is a real bummer that they can get away with it even briefly. I was on the line with school officials giving clarity on the agreement and telling them my attorney said absolutely she SHALL NOT do this. I anticipated the school blocking her decision but no....I still had to clean up everyone's mess and toss the poor kid around a bit. I feel you pain but be thankful she's getting a taste of this now and hopefully gets the point. My son is 12 so he knows what's going on and this was moms idea. S…
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/22 02:46 PM
3

Poo poo for her, so sad. My take is the kid stays in the same school no matter what. . It might be good to be disappointed. It shows you had higher expectations of someone and you've gotten a taste of the true self. If she agrees to this arrangement then you should have an easy pass to fair custody. Do me a favor and smile really big while you pick your kids up for extra time.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/22 02:33 PM
1

If you can't hack it, go every other weekend or something. Do some weeknights for a few hours to balance it out a bit more. Make it look like she is benefitting in some way even with an arrangement she doesn't seem to like. She's getting a free pass on all of the weekends and you are left holding the bag. You are worthy of mental sanity and happiness as it will benefit your kids as well. I highly doubt the only thing she can work is three nights every weekend.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/22 02:19 PM
1

It's stated in my custody stipulation (Pennsylvania) that major decisions like this require my input. Her deciding to pull my son from brick and mortar school even after I called her and asked her what the f*** she was doing and told her she can't do it without my permission. Her response was that she can do whatever she wants. Legit answer but don't expect me to sit with it. This thus far has awarded me 50/50 custody and my son is back in physical school. My attorney requested an emergency hear…
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/22 02:11 PM
1

Haha well I’ll step aside then!
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 11:29 PM
1

Might just be a smidge of jealousy talking but I think everyone should have a vocation. I played it old school and let her stay home with the agreement that she find a job once the kids were in school.....That has turned into me being "less available" for the kids and my kids thinking being a bum is normal. Why work hard when someone else will pay you to stay home? Granted, she doesn't even complete general SAH duties.... Hey, more power to ya brother, just don't be a bum.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 08:37 PM
1

I was all in for the daughter until I came across this post....Is there a balance of getting the new GF to see the whole picture and getting the point or is she completely unreasonable? Is your intention for this woman to stick around and is the outlook healthy? This one is deep buddy, tread carefully. You got out to create a healthier dynamic for yourself...is there any benefit other than a wet wiener to appeasing the new woman? If not, tell her to pound sand.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 08:26 PM
1

It is so damn tiring. But it's so refreshing that I can sit down now with my new better half and actually see a disagreement through without anyone going into an atomic rage or roundy round talking. I actually struggle with it almost like I have PTSD.....when the disagreement is over I'm like "Wow, was that it? Aren't you supposed to scream or something? Throw something?" It's so peaceful that I kinda get uncomfortable....
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 08:12 PM
2

Ah the throes of fresh love. Isn't it so great watching it blossom?! LoL! I almost feel like a brother should warn a fellow brother in a case like this.....I hope they end up happy and may you be happier!
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 08:01 PM
4

I'm recently divorced with VERY recent 50/50 custody. Knowing then what I know now and had I had more footing established immediately post separation, I would have fought to the bitter end (as civically as possible) for 50/50. I'm now swimming upstream against some challenges by waiting so long to be more involved in my children's lives. BUT...I did have some challenges to overcome myself. Weigh you options and Godspeed brother. I just started a thread today you might find useful....https://www.…
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 07:52 PM
1

I'm not happy. "This" isn't working. I don't want to live like "this". You don't love me. I can't do "this" anymore. You are this, you are that, you don't do this, you don't do that. It can be an endless barrage of carrot chasing and "lookest thou over there" if you aren't careful. I think incessant talk like that is also a sign of a mental disorder.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 07:35 PM
2

Young guys need to get on here and read this stuff.....not to disdain women but to give them this wisdom. There are so many similarities between these situations its kinda creepy.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 07:21 PM
3

What a great way of putting it......
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 07:15 PM
1

I feel like we are currently living in the last paragraph of your reply. My oldest seems to play resilient and (mostly) accountable with me. But I hear a whole different side is shown to his mother....which leads me to believe he's battling to maintain a double life right now and I struggle to know which face is the real face. Hopefully therapy helps this.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 07:12 PM
2

That's a simple one for me to continue! I often get comments about how I let my kids question me alot. I explain it's because I want them to know there is more to life than just my opinion. Hopefully teaching them that there is more to life than just their mothers opinion too, no matter how much she screams and threatens.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 07:02 PM
1

It took me awhile....I felt like a bad person, like I failed one of life's biggest endeavors, like I bailed on my family. That was her talking. This voice persisted despite me knowing how many times she said she wanted the divorce and "how miserable her life was because of me" and how unstable and unhealthy our relationship was for the whole family. I know in my heart that everyone is happier because of it. Even though it's not "normal" for the kids now, they get a break from the chaos created i…
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 06:53 PM
1

I was in your shoes. I held marriage on a higher pedestal than my own life. Now, I don't look back. My death would have only benefitted her as she would have successfully gotten everything.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 06:47 PM
3

Well, it was a plethora of things all added up. I think the multiple sucker punches (usually I knew they were coming) to the back of my head did it for me...not only that but the way I responded scared the hell out of me. I grabbed her and almost returned a blow, fist drawn with rage. Men, don't let yourself get to this point....get the hell out of Dodge. My fear of leaving was overcome by the man I was going to become if I stayed.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 05:14 PM
2

Thanks for the in depth response! Part of my struggle is that I don't really know what to talk about without divulging what may be a slippery slope of insinuating that their mother is a common denominator in all of her troubles. I want to help my son understand why his mother couldn't single handedly pull him out of brick and mortar school after he failed 6th grade then bombed the summer school I paid for him to attend. "It's my fault" that I left a vacuum in their house for an abusive criminal …
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 03:47 PM
1

By the way, if you need to talk more about it, I'd be happy to share some of my ups and downs with my situation. Feel free to PM me.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 01:42 PM
1

I just got awarded 50/50 about 90 days ago courtesy of an emergency order. Prior to that I had been the EOW Dad. EOW had some value in that it gave me some room to get get my life back together and create a new foundation for myself and my kids. It didn't come without it's challenges though. My ex suffers from borderline personality disorder and fits the bill of a narc so there were going to be challenges no matter what. If you have your affairs in order and you are sure you are ready for it, I'…
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 01:37 PM
1

I tried to give you an award for this but all of my money went to my attorney and my ex so you get a freeish sort of reply instead. I don't think you could have stated this any better. It's necessary for us to make sacrifices for our family but our soul does not belong to our ex or our family. Don't let them kill it.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 12:57 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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