I feel a little overwhelmed as I start to type this out because I realize the full divulgence of my story could take weeks. But I'll try to expose the tips of the icebergs as much as I can with the time that I have at hand. As a divorced Dad of three and a divorcer of an undiagnosed narcissistic ex with diagnosed borderline personality disorder, my life is still a bit hectic. I've always joked that I could write a book....Well, that was before I got married....Now I may need to consider a second New York Time's best seller. And as I sit here typing, I'm still working on adding more chapters to the book, so consider this a brainstorming session! And yes, I know I will need an editor....my literature skills aren't the finest. Also, it may help to work backwards as I see this not as a blossoming but as a withering. So, we'll look at the current withered state and detail how it got this way. I can't share the LATEST details of this saga as it could jeopardize my current maneuvers but bear with me.

So as we stand today, I have EMERGENCY 50/50 custody of my three beautiful children in a quaint little townhouse with my little high school sweetheart. MY white buffalo, the one that I only let roam, not fully escape. I've held a full time job for the past 20 years, no incarcerations or other life ruinous issues. My ex lives in her parents house, single, essentially widowed (I only say "essentially" because they didn't marry) with no job and a fatherless child. She collects my child support and alimony, pings me for loans and extra payments all the time and has quite "the reputation" with the townsfolks. She is a long term illegal substance addict with no criminal record or faltering as she always has a monkey to do her bidding. She operates behind the scenes like a demon in the night. This can be proven by her lack of a main stream social network and a VERY private life....which keeps getting more withdrawn everyday.

I've spent much of the last four years trying to be hopeful that she would get back on her feet. I obliged in every way I could manage, from a distance of course, keeping in mind that her success should be the success of my children as well. Of course I have to preface this all by saying that I had many of my own challenges to overcome post divorce which I'm confident that I have resolved. From a humble vantage point, I now see my problems were not as bad as she told me they were....compared to....the ones she didn't know she had...that I wasn't allowed to talk about.

Her latest fling, a guy she brought around my children, and shamefully I did very little but try to be there for my children through it, was a social deviant. A known criminal with a long rap sheet. Nothing to do with the sex offender registry, so I felt at a loss as to my power and stood back. Plus, a lot of people change....maybe. Well....as of last year, he is dead. From a methamphetamine overdose while in police custody. Keep in mind this is one of her drugs of choice as well. He was arrested because the ex and he were "going at it", a domestic dispute. He left behind, at the time, a four month old child under the care of my ex. This is about the time my oldest son started receding into the child I struggle to reignite today.

One thing that strikes me so funny about their fling while he was still alive was, when I asked her the due date of the baby so that I could plan the week long custody of my children. She quipped and told me there was no baby due. I joked to others that it must have been a severe case of liver failure or a ginormous, really fast growing tumor then! Christmas eve, I got the call, "drop everything and come get your kids I'm going into labor". The next emergency was this guys death.

I'm currently under emergency custody of my children, mostly, but not triggered by one single event, due to my eldest's current inability to get it together in school. Last year's absentee was a whopping 76 days not attended. His mother came crawling saying she needed $xxx to put him though summer school. I said I'll pay. Well, the price wasn't what she told me. Another typical scenario. Which has become one of the many reasons I handle everything financial. I imagined a Utopia. One where she doesn't work, I pay support and alimony, she'll handle the schooling, no big deal. I get an e-mail two weeks before summer school is finished, offering an extension to complete assignments. Spoke to son and mother about it and it seemed like everything was in order. I then received a final e-mail stating that summer school was failed. Well, sorry kid, you'll have to do the grade all over again! He attended the first day of the new repeat year, but misses the second, third, etcetera. I call the school looking for information as you can't ask the ex (refer back to the pregnancy lie) and I ask them what the excuse is for the absences. "Well sir, your wife is pulling your son from school to put him in home school." THIS was the day that fully changed my outlook on the person I thought maybe i at least understood a little. Dad realizes she cant be in charge of even fixing a sandwich, let alone THIS.

When I called her to question her decision to pull him from school, she proceeded to tell me "I can do whatever the fu** I want." Let's just say that after dragging her to court my son is back in school and surviving. Keep in mind that I still have to share 50/50 custody with this succubus. This keeps me having to contend with the attitudes they drag over from her house. Her truancy charges were, like everything else, dropped. Another moment for her to smile and fortify her belief that she CAN do whatever she wants.

Enter another bullshit story about my middle son....who was supposed to be starting his first year of school around the same time mommy had something wrong with her abdomen. Dinner table talks were had at my townhouse about how school was all lined up for everybody by supermom. Like in a Disney Fairytale. Well, turns out, just another lie. Not only a lie that was told to me, but a lie that was coached directly to the children to tell me. Not just an assumed lie, but a "show me data" kind of lie which I only figured out months later.

This direct exposure of my children to her evil bidding and deeds is the chapter we are in at the current moment. I'm willing to do just about everything I can to get them out of there and show them that her lifestyle is not "living". It's the entrance to the bottomless pit of hell. Now that divorce is technically over, I'm gearing up for an exorcism. Before I exercise the demons, I wonder who the third guy to die while in her "possession" will be? Yes, I said third.