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View 32 posts and 2,383 comments by pk2at on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
78

pk2at/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 12:11 AM
36

pk2at/r/Divorce_Men24/03/23 12:28 AM
36

pk2at/r/Divorce_Men25/04/23 01:24 AM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men07/06/23 04:48 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men31/07/23 02:30 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men27/06/23 04:37 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men06/01/24 07:52 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men15/05/23 09:14 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men12/01/23 06:15 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men30/03/23 07:20 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 07:47 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men12/08/23 12:18 AM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 07:40 PM
8

Courtpk2at/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 05:32 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men05/10/23 08:28 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men28/07/23 05:07 AM
7

Spousal Support / Alimonypk2at/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 07:59 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men08/07/25 03:46 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men17/05/23 07:36 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men04/08/23 02:14 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men03/07/23 05:51 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men09/11/22 09:54 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men07/04/23 09:55 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men07/07/25 08:37 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men12/01/23 10:53 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men03/10/22 02:28 AM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men19/11/24 03:47 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 04:52 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men12/01/23 11:12 PM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men21/11/23 03:21 AM
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pk2at/r/Divorce_Men07/01/23 07:08 PM
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Red Pill Theorypk2at/r/TheRedPill28/11/22 08:50 PM
Showing the 1,000 most recent of 2,383 comments.
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
4

The penalties don't apply after 18. Tell them you will only pay till 18 and they can go to court beyond that. Of course, this assumes you are ready to fight
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/26 03:57 PM
1

I agree, searching the filings in WA, I found no case in 2025 involving alimony or spousal support non payment
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/26 07:51 PM
3

I agree this type of doomer talk only helps attorneys. Its true family courts behave like kangaroo courts and tend to award women blindly, but you should re-double efforts
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/26 07:43 PM
4

You missed quite a few , but the biggest miss was simple gifts to Parents/Relatives using marital property. A large gift $5M plus with proper tax filing makes it shockingly difficult to argue the asset was dissipated.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/26 07:41 PM
2

What were you doing all these years not preparing for an event which has a 40% probability? Obviously, the law is unfair and you should obviously fight it tooth and nail. However if you've filed all the papers and made the disclosures, its probably too late to give you any tips on how to preserve assets.
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/26 05:33 PM
1

All I can say is you should listen to people when they tell you the system is biased against men
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/26 12:23 AM
1

You should be able to manage 50-50 custody. However don't count on receiving any child support. Only 5% of cases result in men receiving CS. Its far more likely you'll be asked to provide for childcare during weekdays with all major decisions being taken by the mother
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/26 08:41 PM
1

The inheritance accounts are below the $5M recommended for a trust, but you may want to look into that. Not sure which state you are in but the general advice is to remove inheritance and separate property from the table, i.e. be extremely careful when filing out the financial disclosure form and not put anything which is not legally yours (most trusts don't have to be disclosed)
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/26 11:25 PM
1

Every other day in King, County, WA
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/26 06:38 PM
1

LoL, check my 5+ years of posts/replies on this forum
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/26 06:22 PM
1

That happens only in your dream world
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/26 05:52 PM
1

OMG newcomer here!
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/26 10:54 PM
1

My usual advice, take a sabbatical and declare zero income during filing (ignore comments which tell you prior 3 years pay history is taken into account), don't declare any financial asset she is unaware of, give a low valuation to your house. I get the feeling you've already declared all your assets. In that case just add up everything and divide by 2. Yes, the entire 50% of the 401K will be given to her, not just the appreciation. You could have avoided the situation by cashing out the 401K an…
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/26 08:33 PM
1

Nothing specific to Indian men, but immigrant men in general would benefit from close interaction and gifts to parents and siblings. Its a great way to reduce marital property. They also have a big shelter in being able to use offshore foreign bank accounts. I would focus more on preserving assets vs looking for support
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/26 06:49 PM
1

I've seen most mistakes made during initial filing of divorce. Men are led to believe their only option is to give 50% of marital assets away. This is flatly untrue.
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/26 07:15 PM
1

Depending on the state, you can file jointly and not have to go to court
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/26 04:02 AM
1

Also teach them simple tricks to preserve financial assets during divorce
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 05:41 AM
1

I would be very skeptical about such people.Its organizations like the NPO, justice foundations, simple e-filing and changing court forms have achieved far more than any 'men's rights' activist. I sometimes feel these guys are promoted by women's orgs to have men rally behind the wrong guy.
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 05:40 AM
2

What was this disclosed as during filing? Bigger question, why was this disclosed? The biggest mistakes are made right during the filing. If this was disclosed as a separate asset or not disclosed, its worth a fight. However if you disclosed as part of marital property it boils down to how you negotiate and what you tell the judge when it comes to trial.
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/26 08:23 PM
2

Use it to your advantage and ask for a good deal, way better than the 50-50 offer
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/26 06:37 PM
1

Next year you can file using single status. That is what IRS rules say
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/26 03:00 AM
2

Yes, you should ask for reduction. If a lawyer is expensive, try filing on your own
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 06:58 PM
–

Empty your joint accounts first. Always reduce marital property prior to divorce
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 02:13 AM
1

I am giving you the loopholes for free, lawyers are charging you for canned advice. Take it or leave it
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 01:45 AM
0

Has anyone been refused a divorce because they couldn't prove 1-year separation?
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 01:20 AM
0

No state asks you to be physically separate for 1 year, even if there are clauses in law, they won't be enforced
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 12:48 AM
2

Sure, listen to your lawyer with 100% guaranteed suffering and $$ loss vs. listen to random internet stranger with 80% chance of lower alimony + lower stress job
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 08:58 PM
-2

Quit the job and ask for reduction. Don't listen to your lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 08:43 PM
2

That's because you are a sucker and agree to everything
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 08:23 PM
2

Plenty available depending on your legal and financial risk appetite. Easiest one is to just put zero assets and zero income and let her dispute and prove everything else. Not sure why everyone seems to think its perjury, although my local court has not once in 6,000+ cases questioned the numbers on the disclosure. For more sophisticated loopholes, check my prior posts before they get nuked
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 08:20 PM
2

If you are planning to leave the country, sell the house, transfer money outside country, file for divorce, disclose zero assets within TX jurisdiction, get divorce, move out of country.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/26 10:41 PM
3

You should employ similar tactics
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/25 08:43 PM
1

Many was to avoid marital property split. Your way is the most obvious one
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/25 07:51 PM
2

Another eye opener is that most men are simply ignorant, afraid or unwilling to exploit the dozens of loopholes available to avoid splitting assets, reduce or avoid alimony and CS. These same men are more than willing to try every tax loophole out there
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/25 07:50 PM
4

Too many of these posts are showing up. They just want to poll opinion of divorced men
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/25 08:37 PM
1

The reality is that many women attorneys are feminists and hate men. They take on these cases knowing fully well their client is lying and do it solely to harass men. On the other hand ALL male attorneys are ChatGPT type people who will do what the state law and website calculator tells them. They will never point to any loopholes or ways to avoid losing money
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/25 04:45 PM
4

The bigger question is why men do nothing to protect themselves financially when they note this behavior? Its better than simply letting you 'blood boil'
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/25 11:54 PM
1

Its a waste of time, unless we are talking in excess of $10M, I wouldn't go this route. Courts are very reluctant to drag in unrelated third party financial institutions. I would advise you to be creative while disclosing your assets to even out what she has hidden.
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/25 07:40 PM
5

Its best to be silent and not reveal much, including any assets and income she does not know about, and no that's not perjury in any state
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/25 11:30 PM
2

You are actually in a good spot with your lack of employment. Let this go to court and tell the court you were pressed for money and have no hope for future employment. Don't worry, courts don't penalize you for emergency use of marital funds.Make sure you get lowest possible CS order, then feel free to pursue any high paying job you want.
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/25 05:06 PM
1

If you cannot trust your own children, you have much bigger problem than family court
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/25 05:18 PM
13

I get routinely dissed on this sub for suggesting number 4. Believe it or not making the pot of money small through every possible loophole works wonders in any divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men30/11/25 08:47 AM
1

Why should the court listen to a minor? I hope you understand family court is mostly a child support decider when it comes to custody. Lets say the 9 year old wants to live with dad, in which case CS payment to mom has to be reduced which in turn means the state loses federal money. When money is involved people are going to fight
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/25 04:00 PM
6

Very interesting laws in Poland. Why don't you act and pretend everything is OK for a year like your attorney suggested? Even in the US, I recommend people do this, it gives you a chance to plan for divorce, take your money out of the bank and give to relatives, sell common property etc. Try to avoid talking to her and pretend like you are busy with work
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/25 03:44 PM
1

Don't show useless websites, show real cases. You need to show proper numbers, for example I can say that 3 out of 6,782 dissolution cases in King County went to forced disclosure, essentially a drop in the bucket for anyone who wants to hide assets. Show me # of cases where the passport was actually confiscated for lack of alimony payment
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/25 06:15 AM
1

You are better off visiting an asset protection professional vs wasting your time with divorce lawyers or looking for help on this feminist board. You can also search on my previous posts for some tips
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/25 11:00 PM
1

Source is actual rulings from King County, WA. There is a blind formula if you claim zero. Will you please shut up about canceling your passport and locking you up. Show me the cases with case numbers
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/25 10:58 PM
-1

Check some prior posts, I've advised taking a sabbatical from work and claim no job. You don't want your employer to know what strategy you are using in family court
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/25 04:42 PM
1

Most GAL's tend to be feminists and support women. The good thing is that most lies don't matter in court which tends to award 50-50 custody by default. However, the CS and money aspect is where you may get hit. I would suggest prudence and very limited disclosure when it comes to finances
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/25 04:19 PM
2

I would not bring this up with your immediate supervisor
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/25 04:09 PM
2

This is a ridiculous argument in 2025 with all the online and AI options available in most counties in the US. In fact I've worked with non profits to simply court forms needed for dissolution and legal separation
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/25 12:08 AM
1

Very little time is spent reviewing something agreed upon. You can put in separation agreement that you will take mars and she will take venus and that get signed as well. I would absolutely bump up her pay as much as possible and get max child support as initial order
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/25 06:47 PM
1

Oh boy, do a lump sum payment and get out of there
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/25 09:03 PM
0

Unfortunately for you, people I've advised have had their exes move on. I keep checking court cases regularly and have never seen a motion to force disclosure in 24-25
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/25 09:02 PM
1

As folks are saying it depends on the state. Generally your goal should be to pay 0 alimony and try to reduce CS. In most states, the trick is to give higher portion of retirement/401K which would otherwise get hit with max tax rate.
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/25 08:57 PM
3

I do see other terms like 'marital property' and 'legal separation' show a jump as well
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/25 07:10 PM
0

Summer is usually the time to file but I see this year was waaay worse than earlier. Is this related to political climate in the US?
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/25 07:05 PM
2

LoL, thousands have listened over the years and several have thanked me for the excellent advice. I've worked in WA state to start a trend of using legal separation as a post-nup. I worked with NW Justice Foundation to have an option for divorce filing without declaring finances.Lawyer types have banned me 5 times over the years, they hate me as men are now keeping what they earn
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/25 07:18 PM
3

Never show additional income or financial info unless there is an order for forced disclosure (which is very rare), state zero income and let the other party contest and prove
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/25 06:14 PM
-1

Just declare your income as $50K, Do not make the mistake of declaring $300K
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/25 03:16 AM
2

Big difference between claiming zero income and declaring you are jobless vs. saying you voluntarily took up a $40K job after holding a $140K job. How is that relevant to what I advised?
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/25 03:12 AM
2

We live in 2025, have access to court judgement databases and know when to call out nonsense. The average case is decided in 15 min. If you think the judge will take on the role of IRS and HR dept and scrutinize all your financial data, job history and local employment conditions, you are nuts. He will take a standard 3 year income average to impute your income and dump some $$ as alimony which can and should be contested later during modification. That 3 year average crashes if your current inc…
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/25 08:13 PM
2

This is why, you need to claim you are jobless during divorce. IT is much easier to get a modification if the initial ruling was forced on you despite claiming zero income. Alimony caps out around 60% of income but they don't look at the expense side
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/25 05:52 PM
3

Yes, we have national parents organization, several state level court reforms, learn about crypto, learn about trusts etc. Patiently educate men on prenups, getting a strategic legal separation, gifting assets to parents/relatives etc.
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/25 07:54 PM
5

No need to be negative, but you should protect yourself
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/25 07:41 PM
2

Two major red flags here 1) Repeatedly threatening divorce. This shows she doesn't care about your friendship, her culture or traditional roles 2) Abuse, both verbal and physical, shows lack of respect. You want to get out of a situation like this ASAP. At a bare minimum file for legal separation and don't have any legal connection with her
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/25 08:54 PM
2

I was banned years ago on that sub after giving advice on how to get a favorable split of assets
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/25 02:11 AM
1

Am I missing something? How is any of this, even if true, an excuse for neglecting family?
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/25 11:03 PM
0

Its true that change of hormones can cause women to be cranky and irritable during menopause. However there is no hormone on earth that make a woman file for divorce. That marriage breaking act is NOT a result of hormones.
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/25 11:01 PM
15

Seeing opposite cases on the west coast. Palestine is more important than family
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/25 08:03 PM
3

This is not good advice, your financial recovery depends on duration of marriage, your age, investments etc. You should fight for every penny and use every loophole to get all your assets back during divorce and never be happy with a 50-50 split. Ignore lawyer types and pump fanboys who tell you it'll all be OK
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/25 04:13 PM
3

The big question is are you married?
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/25 10:12 PM
2

99% of the time women make up fake stories in divorce court, seen this too often to believe otherwise. They don't like their husbands and confuse that with him being a narcissist.
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/25 08:47 AM
0

Not really, you are just one client for your attorney but there is a whole system that feeds her. She can easily guide you and recommend several loopholes to let you keep most of your assets. However just as a doctor would recommend vaccines even if he knows some of them are bad quality, there are family court system behaviors she has to stick to. These behaviors force attorneys to repeat two lines 1) All assets must be fully disclosed to the other party 2) 50-50 asset split is the best you can …
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/25 08:31 AM
2

If you are close to retirement, do it early and show zero income
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/25 03:24 AM
5

Yes, you should ask for the split
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/25 05:53 PM
2

You should get back and fight these accusations. The best retort is by lowering your income and declaring very few assets. The $$ are pretty much the only place men can hit back
/r/Divorce_Men17/10/25 04:48 AM
3

If its less than a year, take that money out and keep it separate. You should immediately file for divorce and not disclose any of that inheritance. If it comes up in forced disclosure, don't talk about the joint account
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/25 09:52 PM
2

Check some prior discussions, you should always file first as you get to decide what to declare as marital and separate property and what not to disclose. These disclosures are where most mistakes are made and its impossible to rectify at later stage
/r/Divorce_Men13/10/25 03:15 AM
1

Avg income would go down substantially if you quit and show 0 in one of the years. I agree, this is not an option for some as employers may not be ready to give unpaid leave and hire you back after 6-8 months
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/25 11:57 PM
0

This is what all lawyers are told to say as a lawyers cannot advice you in good faith to 'earn less and pay less'. However checking judgements and outcomes for 1000's of cases, its clear to me that Judges are taking what is declared and are not venturing to second guess the motives or labor market conditions.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/25 11:52 PM
2

This is partly on you. If you are not ready to take a sabbatical and show lower income or disclose lower income while filing, you are essentially volunteering to pay. I am yet to see a case where a family court ordered a government agency to investigate someone's income.
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/25 02:58 PM
1

It all depends on which assets were declared. Anything declared will be split in half, anything not declared or hidden is yours or hers to keep
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/25 06:55 PM
2

Short term marriage = no alimony
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/25 06:36 PM
2

Rich men often underestimate how brutal international divorces can be. Its very rare to see contested divorces among US elite. All we get to see here are joint filings with zero disclosure of assets
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/25 05:24 PM
1

If she has a marriage certificate signed by Trump the court will accept it prima facie. Paternity is presumed in case married women getting pregnant. Of course, he can challenge the presumption with a paternity test
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/25 03:13 AM
1

This never happens in reality. Never declare should be the default guidance to all men
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/25 11:59 PM
2

Its quite easy, whatever she declares as marital assets will be split 50-50 in case of dispute. Getting a lawyer is waste of money and none of her arguments will hold water. Same goes for you, be extremely careful in what you declare (the less you declare the better). Whatever she does not declare is hers to keep
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/25 08:14 PM
5

Make sure you get an appraiser who will value it much higher than the market. That way when the Judge takes the mid point, you will get the market rate
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/25 08:04 PM
2

If you have disclosed everything and your lawyers have filed all the forms, you can definitely do it yourself
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/25 12:48 AM
2

Wait till retirement, take the investments and go to another state
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/25 09:24 PM
1

Why on earth would you disclose an RSU? Assuming it was separate prior to marriage and wife does not know about it, is there a specific requirement for full disclosure of separate property in your county's dissolution form?
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/25 09:07 PM
4

Check previous posts, lots of options. In a nutshell, family court is all about money and what you disclose
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/25 09:04 PM
10

Most of the men in this forum have not paid for a prostitute it as its illegal in all 50 states. FWB is something they show in movies, doesn't exist in real life
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/25 07:16 PM
1

Sounds like a made up ChatGPT story given no case detail
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/25 06:04 PM
1

That's how it is in all 50 states. IT depends on recipients need (i.e. what she asks for or what she thinks her need is) and capped at 60% of ability to pay, i.e. if the idiot disclosed all his earnings, bonus, stock options etc after listening to misguided attorney advice
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/25 05:58 PM
1

This is key, you can't do much about a few thousand, no matter what the law says
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/25 08:42 PM
-1

In Oregon, I recommend signing online, post dated legal separation prior to marriage and filing for legal separation a month after marriage
/r/Divorce_Men16/09/25 02:24 AM
4

That's what CPS is for, its not the job of family court to decide this during divorce
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/25 03:37 AM
12

Have you ever been to family court? In every custody, every mother says that every child is always at risk with every father. Its almost 100% of the time
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/25 03:34 AM
4

Wish you all the best and I agree that incrementalism is victory. We got a bunch of forms and procedures changed here in WA state and that in itself is giving plenty to loopholes for men to exploit
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/25 07:25 AM
2

This is true if you are seeking to reduce taxes paid on income, its a huge risk for a small tax saving. However a lot of inheritance/estate/gift taxes can be avoided by marrying and strategically divorcing
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/25 08:46 PM
3

If you have assets beyond a threshold, there are attractive tax loopholes for married couples. Likewise, divorcing strategically and claiming bankruptcy entitles you to many government benefits. I never realized how big this tax racket is until Jeff Bezos got divorced in WA and then married again in FL. His ex-wife did the same and she still has the Bezos surname. The entire family has now escaped inheritance taxes, capital gains taxes etc. and provided 100% secrecy and privacy to their children
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/25 07:28 PM
6

There isn't much you can do. Make sure you lockout or cash what you feel is yours. Don't think you'll be able to get back money easily
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/25 01:39 PM
9

It does sound cruel to hear, but its largely accurate. First off plunging into marriage without a prenup, trust or legal separation in 2025 is an incredibly foolish act. Yet, even to this day, over 85% of marriages involve no break up planning. Most men know about Tinder and online dating and how easy it is for women to hook up and cheat. Most have also heard about red-pill, Alpha male etc. and the importance of being dominant in the relationship. Despite all of this, we keep seeing men showing …
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/25 03:36 AM
5

Did you look into online legal separation?
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/25 09:03 PM
1

I mean 'legal separation', that's different from divorce or dissolution. That's not available in TX (but available in about 20 other states). You can dissolve marital property without dissolving marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/25 08:58 PM
1

Not in Texas, you don't have legal separation. I don't believe online filing without asset disclosure is available either. All the tricks that work in CA might not work in TX.Guessing trust creation may be a way but I haven't looked in TX
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/25 01:30 AM
1

There is significant difference in assets, you need to do some prep work before filing. Under no circumstance should you declare that $1M voluntarily while filing. You can check this forum or my previous posts, there are several ways to convert your marital property into separate property or at least ensure you don't get screwed in a 50:50 split
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/25 03:21 AM
2

This is actually an excellent idea. I would suggest the following approach 1) Take sabbatical or unpaid leave of absence from high paying job in second half of year 2) Join low paying job before year ends and continue in this role early next year 3) File next year and say you've been in role for 2 years and current market reality is 60K 4) Build up solid evidence to say that 60K is the market wage and its never going to be 200K or do due to AI (or other business conditions) As long as your job c…
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/25 04:26 PM
1

My court database search indicates prenups are very rarely or never challenged in court. In my state and county, King County, WA, prenups are part of the law and court forms. The court is going to review its applicability only in case of dispute, else the terms are accepted.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/25 09:40 PM
7

You can buy the house, but living in it carries the risk of litigation as primary residence is usually considered community property
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/25 06:07 PM
1

No, you can take your time. There is no compulsion to accept any offer, you can actually quote a high number and sit on it for years. She has to go to court again and say you are trying to stall
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/25 03:39 AM
7

Reddit is ~85% leftist, just putting Trump's name will get you down votes, even if its in the context of a divorce. Remember this the next time in family court which is also leftist and sees all men as 'Trump'
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/25 06:21 PM
5

This is definitely an interesting topic of discussion. There is no doubt religion played a huge part in making marriages exceptionally successful in the past (you would not be here making $$ if 100 generations before you got divorced or remained single). Many of these religious practices were codified into law. Society began to change around 1940 or so, jobs involving physical labor began to decline and white collar jobs which women could perform began to increase. This was coupled with basic ex…
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/25 05:37 PM
1

Court mandated CS has no bearing on the 'child's best interest', its a calculation based on % of income designed to keep single mothers off welfare. There are zero checks to see if even a single $ is being spend on the child
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/25 05:20 PM
3

You should never agree to income withholding. In case you get a higher paying job, your ex will automatically know
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/25 07:16 PM
1

Get her signature on a legal separation (not dissolution) form and file online. Its CA and its 2025, with luck you don't need to go to court or give her anything
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/25 07:19 PM
7

In family court, the most convincing and well documented lie wins
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/25 05:01 PM
4

With experience, I can tell you a lawyer is totally worthless here. They know little about asset protection and will intentionally lie about court procedures
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/25 04:51 PM
5

Check some of my prior posts, you have plenty of options 1) Gifts to friends/relatives with correct tax form 2) Gifts to adult children of marriage, no need of tax form unless above $ threshold 3) Offshore trust if assets above $10M formed with appropriate clauses 4) On shore trust for assets $5-$10M 5) Crypto transfers 6) Buy house on parents name and rent from them There are several other options if marriage becomes rocky. Note that each of these options can be contested if things get messy, b…
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/25 04:49 PM
1

No, if you are ready to marry and divorce strategically, there are plenty of tax and inheritance benefits. Specially true if you are wealthy and its excellent to preserve privacy of children. Also great for those who want state provided financial aid, which they are ineligible due to higher income
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/25 04:45 AM
1

It depends on what the support order says. Irrespective of the order, you can always try quitting your job and claiming its impossible to get similar paying job.
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/25 01:21 AM
5

Men have their own echo chamber called lawyers+internet. Once they have to go to family court, there is a whole set of people telling them to disclose all their assets, their paychecks and that 50:50 is the best they can hope for. Also anyone complaining is asked to 'go to the gym'
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/25 12:54 AM
3

This is reality, Judges will take what is currently disclosed as income
/r/Divorce_Men28/07/25 03:09 AM
2

I don't know where you are getting this info, but money judgements against those who are not currently working are extremely rare
/r/Divorce_Men28/07/25 03:08 AM
6

We have some people giving bad advice here. Most of the income disclosure is voluntary. Unless there are joint returns, she can always say her income was below filing threshold for several years and there is no way to prove it. Given that judges barely spend 5 minutes per case, IT is quite likely she will be imputed at a lower wage if she deliberately chooses not to work
/r/Divorce_Men28/07/25 03:07 AM
6

Given duration of marriage, you are probably close to retirement. So why not retire, claim zero income and say you cannot give any alimony?
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/25 06:54 PM
3

Irrespective of what your lawyer says, common sense is to break the marital property prior to receiving inheritance
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/25 03:35 PM
2

Yikes, no! Legal tech guy who helps men in family courts. Volunteer for northwest justice project
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/25 06:25 PM
1

Two main issues with AI when I tried filling out forms for some folks 1) Inability to make context specific recommendations on questions like division of property, ex in WA state dissolution form there are 4 choices on how marital property should be divided 1) according to agreement 2) asking court to fairly divide 3) property already divided and each spouse keeps assets they control and 4) there is no property to divide Surprisingly each of these 4 options is applicable to almost every divorce,…
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/25 06:13 PM
3

Which state are in? About 22 states have some form of legal separation where you remain married legally but stay in the same house with no financial obligations to each other. I can understand why lawyers will not recommend this. Its a massive loss of business as legal separation form costs $300 and a contested divorce can run $70K-$100K
/r/Divorce_Men19/07/25 06:43 PM
1

Use AI (Grok is best, Gemini and ChatGPT ok) and ask it to fill a form with examples you give. Choose options where you don't have to disclose assets
/r/Divorce_Men19/07/25 06:39 PM
3

Did you get anything for the $100K spent on legal fees?
/r/Divorce_Men19/07/25 03:43 AM
3

Legally speaking a quitclaim alone is not sufficient for transmutation (converting marital to separate property). In reality, once you lose control of the asset, there are many ways your wife can pocket the house during a divorce
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/25 07:35 PM
2

What is being contested? More detail needed
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/25 08:00 PM
1

Pleasant-Mechanic-49 is quoting from case law prior to 2010. Few important changes have taken place post 2010. 1) Most of the large states CA, NY, TX and now FL have adopted some form of online filing for divorce which does not need asset disclosure. 2) The estate tax limits are now at $30M which means you not expected to keep track of transfers below that amount other than filing a tax return 3) In 2022, Sen Patty Murray wanted to have spousal permission to withdraw 401K funds but this never pa…
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/25 07:55 PM
1

Fair enough, just be prepared with the documentation and a water tight story. Most times lawyers bring up dissipation to extract a better deal for the wife, as long as you don't break, you should be fine
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/25 04:17 AM
2

Check my previous deleted post on this topic. A properly documented gift with a 709 filed and signed jointly cannot be deemed 'dissipation' by itself. Three ways lawyers try to challenge this are 1) Gifted without knowledge of wife 2) She was unaware of impact on marital property and 3) The gift leaves her destitute or the asset split is grossly unfair To give you some numbers, in King County, WA, out of ~6K dissolution cases, less than 2% of cases go to trial. Only 0.6% go the forced financial …
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/25 03:26 AM
1

This is unfortunately true, WA state hardly listens to men during custody disputes and tends to give women more custody. However its much better when it comes to asset split WA state has online legal separation which is supposed to be filed preemptively (soon after marriage) which lays out split of assets and alimony can be waived. Most men don't this, they tend to listen to lawyers and show up in court without a solid made up story (like wife abused the children etc. )
/r/Divorce_Men15/07/25 12:27 AM
1

Yes, lawyers tend to follow state law guidelines which recommend 50-50. You are under no obligation to follow their advice
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/25 04:21 AM
1

Without lawyers, you can draw up 99-1, get her to sign it, the Judge will stamp it without question
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 09:46 PM
3

This is probably the only way. The issue with family courts is they don't listen unless there are financial issues involved
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 06:00 PM
2

It shouldn't work that way, there is reduction for more than 1+ year of unemployment. You should also make a claim that finding a job is difficult
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/25 06:26 PM
6

You may want to take a break from work for a couple years and file when you have zero income
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/25 02:29 PM
1

With online legal separation available in 30 states after 2023, it becomes very easy if you have $$$$. Prior to marriage get her to sign a post dated legal separation (ex dated Jan 1'st 2026). Marry in June 2025 like Bezos, file the online form next year. Once legal separation is approved, you can stay married with all the benefits but she can't ask for more than agreement (like a binding prenup) Rich guys and their lawyers have figured out this stuff and gotten states to pass laws to suit them.…
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/25 12:39 AM
1

Plenty of benefits: 1) Gift tax additional $15M exemption 2) Unlimited tax free asset transfer to wife during divorce who can then marry and transfer unlimited amount to another person 3) Joint family trust to avoid estate taxes 4) Marrying spouse with foreign citizenship allows her to open foreign bank account and avoid capital gains tax 5) Additional $250K capital gains exemption in WA state 6) Giving wife and kids a 'strategic divorce' with them receiving 0 assets and full custody, allows you…
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/25 12:22 AM
5

Pain will go away, but if you have 15+ years of marriage, you won't recover financially if you part with 50% of your assets. Be smart, ignore your lawyer, do your research on gifts, transfers, trusts, crypto,financial discovery, online legal separation etc. and save your ass(ets)
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/25 10:31 PM
1

Check my most unpopular posts from prior years, tired of repeating with lawyer/moderators hovering around
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/25 06:38 PM
1

That's the default and most likely outcome if you go the 'traditional lawyer route'. Given its 2025, you have plenty of other 'options'
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/25 05:19 PM
1

Still unlikely, she basically waived her right to a portion of your business. Hidden assets are treated the same way, once divorce is finalized, court presumes you waive your right to the portion unless you can prove wilful concealment or deceit.
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/25 05:11 PM
0

Yes, check my previous post (which got deleted). Classify the cash out as a gift and file form 709 in next year tax return.
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/25 04:11 PM
6

Its very tough for asset split to be revisited, If you got hold of an appreciating asset, if you managed to hide assets, if you got a gift etc. from parents, its all yours to keep
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/25 04:08 PM
6

You need to give us more detail on the filings. Typically men make plenty of mistakes listening to generic advice from lawyers
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/25 03:35 PM
1

I would leave those posts, most of family court is concerned about assets and finances.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/25 02:22 PM
0

If you are a lawyer, I can see why you will not like what I've told. Over the years my reddit posts alone have contributed to 1000's of cases lost for lawyers
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/25 01:32 AM
-5

Valid gift (with form 709 filed on a joint return) is never considered 'dissipation of assets'
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/25 08:42 PM
7

These days (legal) marriage makes sense only for very wealthy men who want to utilize various tax provisions to secure their wealth
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/25 05:39 PM
8

Your best bet is to pay CS using standard formula and keep more of the assets. Once an asset split is agreed and signed it cannot be challenged. On the other hand both Alimony and CS are long term commitments that can be challenged.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/25 08:26 PM
4

Legally, there is not much you can do about it. Marital property belongs to either spouse and they can use it as they deem fit. They also don't need to give an explanation or get approval from the other spouse for doing so. This changes when you file for divorce and the court issues an order for 'financial restraint'. The good news for you is that family court and lawyer mafia make it appear that complete financial disclosure throughout marriage is required legally. You can use this scare tactic…
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/25 04:39 PM
2

I think you should negotiate a small alimony and potential shared custody with her for a big chunk of assets. She will eventually get 50:50 custody and probably some CS, so ensure you get to keep most or all assets
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/25 03:52 AM
3

Usually anyone claiming 'men's rights label' and is a divorce lawyer is usually truing to cheat you. I have found asset protection and online research are best
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/25 03:47 AM
1

First off, never tell anyone you are a 'fair person' and willing to split half. That's state law anyway and likely the most foolish starting point for a negotiation. Second, your wife's happiness now may change completely when she finds out your plan. I would contact a lawyer first to see if you could get some type of asset split agreement that your 'happy wife' would sign. Third, don't leave the house and move out as Judge's like to preserve status quo.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/25 09:27 PM
1

Its disappointing to see these same questions pop up. For years we have been advising men in this forum to not leave marital home, file first, not disclose income, list assets as separate etc. Still majority go straight to the lawyer and blindly follow the process thinking it'll be fair
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/25 09:04 PM
1

Did you already disclose all your income, your employer, your tax returns and paystubs?
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/25 08:40 PM
2

Be smart and dump all the debt on her. Let her struggle and contest
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/25 07:03 PM
12

This has been true since the time of apes. Females always mate for security and protection. Men sign up to protect their home and family, not to tolerate bad behavior from females. For past 100 or so years, men have been denied right to kick out females for bad behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/25 05:23 PM
2

In WA state, there is an order that goes out called TMOFR - Temporary Order Setting Financial Restraints. Legally you can move any money prior to this order going out. I would suggest you take advantage and keep ANY joint account small. Given short duration of marriage, its difficult for your wife to argue co-mingling or dragging this through court. Also remember that in King County, WA 99% of what is put in the financial declaration during time of filing is accepted as basis for marital propert…
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/25 07:12 PM
1

You'll have to be very clear that your income is small and you cannot afford $1.8k/month
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/25 06:46 PM
1

Then its off the table. There is no government agency in any state that can investigate what assets a person has
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/25 04:14 AM
2

Guidelines yes, the state is not in a position to verify your finances, let alone drawing a time analysis of your net worth to calculate how much marital and separate property exists. The person filing first gets to put in what is marital and what is separate property. The respondent can challenge (less than 1% do)
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/25 02:49 AM
8

IF base pay has gone down by $100K he can definitely file for CS modification. Also the no contact order for your or your children is meaningless as you were never party to the dissolution.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/25 02:47 AM
0

oh gosh, here is one more. Why on earth do you disclose everything asked by her lawyer? Is he your friend or did he threaten you with perjury? Its essentially shooting yourself in the foot on step 1. A tip for you, there is close to zero you can do if she hides any money. So why not at least have some spare change under your mattress?
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/25 02:55 AM
1

That's good news. Keep the business out of community property. Standard advice I give everyone, always say your business runs under massive loss and you are planning to shut it down (Elon Musk claimed Tesla was bankrupt in 2009)
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/25 07:38 PM
4

Again, I keep asking, did you appeal? did you refuse to pay? were you cited for contempt of court? There needs to be formal dispute to the terms. You can't agree to pay and then backout
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/25 06:49 PM
10

There is really not much you can do. The agreement you made to pay was voluntarily and was independent of her income. It works both ways, if you had claimed low or zero income, her benefit would have been reduced as well. This is why I keep saying on this forum to disclose as little as possible during the initial filing
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/25 06:34 PM
5

Yes, specially if you are filing in a county with heavy backlog (like mine). You control the process and dates. You get to make your financial moves prior to 'restraint order on financials', you get to declare what is marital and separate property, you get first crack at the parenting plan and you get to state refusal to pay spousal support. A surprise, very aggressive filing in a heavy backlog county, immediately raises the legal costs for your wife. She has to contest everything she does not a…
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/25 07:50 PM
2

Give me your state and county and I can try to query.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/25 12:07 AM
1

Very little chance he will be asked to pay lawyer fees
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/25 10:31 PM
1

Its simple, don't pay her and let it go to court. You have nothing to lose as your max penalty is the $20K you agreed to pay. You can also keep delaying court cases for years, make it difficult to serve etc. Use every trick in the book to fight back
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/25 01:53 PM
0

That's a mistake, unless you declare your employer, its very difficult to prove you even work let alone figuring out your pay
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/25 01:49 PM
1

How did he find out who your employer was? Which county and court approved this subpoena? Did you challenge it? I do see serious procedural issues with way things are done in family court.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/25 07:33 PM
1

I would love to see this happen. Note that we have plenty of options on the books right now, prenups, trusts, legal separation soon after marriage, foreign bank accounts, crypto etc. that are never used by men in most divorces. If you talk to married men, they will tell you they don't need it.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/25 05:34 PM
0

Most financial documents and court forms are signed online these days. Forgery here is logging in using 'his/her' mail or 'phone number' and authenticating with a password.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/25 05:26 PM
1

As I always ask, how did she find out your income? Did you disclose voluntarily?
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/25 05:23 PM
1

Can't you just move out and live separately?
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/25 05:06 PM
2

Possible, but it can be contested. With family members, its really tough to contest
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/25 03:21 PM
2

The oath is for what has been declared on the form. You cannot be forced by the government to disclose every asset you currently own or may own in future. If your spouse discovers an asset not declared, burden is on her to prove its yours.
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/25 03:20 PM
1

LoL with only 4 months, there is nothing she can do. Congrats on pulling the plug early, its always much easier
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/25 07:43 PM
1

This is another shocking aspect in family court. Forging signatures between couples is deemed OK. It goes the other way too, you can sign for your wife and its all OK
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/25 04:02 PM
2

The entire family court racket is setup to loot men during divorce. The lawyer is definitely a cog in this wheel. The only advice he can give is to disclose all your assets and pray you get back 50% and not get looted again during CS and alimony hearings. If you are looking for good advice and looking to see how to keep the money you earned during marriage, you need to look outside the system. I have provided several examples in my previous posts over the years on how you can do so. Asset protec…
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/25 03:59 PM
1

The requirement to update income seems to be a big joke in every state. There is no enforcement mechanism whatsoever.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/25 08:16 PM
1

How did she find out you made more? The proof is on her to provide a reliable source, I believe you can simply tell the court, the previous order was fair.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/25 08:11 PM
1

Why are you making this offer so late in the process? There were several basic money transfers you could have done prior to filing, which would save your sons assets. At this stage she can say NO to any offer you make as long as its below market rate. Above market rate, you can force her to settle. However, you'll end up paying more
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/25 08:38 PM
22

No one cares about men during divorce. They are essentially a piggy bank to be raided. If you are frightened and depressed, its easier to get you to list all your assets and grab as much as possible.
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/25 07:57 PM
1

Don't offer anything, the retirement issue has been discussed earlier, its post tax, which means she gets $20K or so out of $50K. I would fight for retaining home equity, ask for $35K out of the $60K of 'her' portion
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/25 07:15 PM
1

You have not mentioned how much you/she earned and saved/invested during the marriage. Lets say you made 3 times as much as her, you should start by asking for 75% of the marital assets (irrespective of separate assets). You are right that home equity is tax free and investments are not. I would say use this to your advantage. Take the highest 39% tax rate (+ state tax if applicable) and say your investments are worth only $250K or so after tax and ask for $100K in home equity Advice is to never…
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/25 04:26 PM
3

Its pretty rare to get all you ask for without questions, but you are not the only one to walk away with 90% plus assets you earned. Out of the ~600K divorces every year, around 400K have primary residence as the only significant asset which gets split. If the couple spent equally on the house then the guy gets back all he put in. There are around 30K divorces with prenup, separation agreement, trusts etc. In most cases, the husband in these divorces retains control of all marital asset contribu…
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/25 09:16 PM
2

I am surprised this forum has not banned me or you for now. My entire forum fair_marriage was removed from reddit as I was giving tips to men on how to save marital assets during divorce
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/25 03:46 AM
7

This is a valid and legal way to pay lower or no spousal support. You have to make the case for underemployment and this can be done only if she was dumb enough to disclose her previous earnings, education, experience etc. Try to frighten her with some internet stories and see if she caves
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/25 08:35 PM
1

Most don't try to do it, everyone I've seen that really does it, gets away with it. We only hear stories on the internet and lawyer websites about cases that did not do it properly
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/25 08:33 PM
6

That's the number where men should learn how to preserve wealth during divorce. Its also a ripe target for lawyers and family courts. Lots of marital assets, stable high paying jobs or businesses they cannot run away from and the guy never thought about divorce
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/25 07:16 PM
4

I use Grok for analyzing cases. One advantage with Grok is its ability to query court databases (you have to do some work) but it can make predictions like 'this may work', 'this is not likely to work' etc. It does make mistakes but none of the other AI engines can say 'what percent of cases lead to forced asset disclosures?'
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/25 08:08 PM
1

Premptive legal separation
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/25 08:36 PM
1

Make sure you tell her no chance you are paying and take it to court. You should also put date of separation 1.5 years prior, this will make it appear she is asking for support for a 2.5 year marriage
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/25 08:55 PM
2

Real tough to provide advice when country, state and county are not mentioned
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/25 08:38 PM
1

Why did you not ask for CS immediately after getting custody?
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/25 11:37 PM
2

Its been that way for a while. This obligation applies for any foreign person you sponsor, not just your spouse
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/25 05:38 PM
2

The sponsorship obligation is capped at 1.5X poverty limit. Its not possible to have a proper life on that income alone. There are several ways to not pay 50% of your assets. Your signing a foolish contract has nothing to do with who you marry
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/25 04:53 PM
2

Its 10 years of 'employment'. Not 10 years of residence in the country
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/25 04:49 PM
1

Has the divorce petition been filed? Typically the first step is the judge ordering a temporary financial restraint order. Prior to that order, cashing out, not listing the cash in financial disclosures and keeping it under your mattress makes it de-facto separate property in 9 out of 10 cases.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/25 08:11 PM
1

Plenty of strategies to reduce CS and Alimony
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/25 03:54 AM
2

Not unless the lender agrees. If you cosign for someone, you are on the hook irrespective of relationship status. Family courts don't have the ability to change a third party contract.This is different from marital debt which is not under your name
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/25 03:52 AM
1

This is a better outcome
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/25 08:14 PM
1

Sounds like ripoff to me, at $350-$400K there is likely to be a big bonus or variable component which shouldn't factor in spousal support
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/25 08:13 PM
1

Get her signatures on the forms when its still amicable
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/25 05:56 PM
2

Yes, you can pre-negotiate and ask them to sign off
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/25 04:32 PM
2

In that case ChatGPT is a better for you. My hope is that you get financially hosed in court as this precise attitude is what leads men to get looted in family court.
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/25 04:19 PM
4

I have lots of advice to provide but definitely not to lawyers. I will say you need to follow the black letter of the law and give her $175K/yr for the rest of her life, as well as pay for the kids college and expenses along with 50% of marital assets including retirement.
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/25 04:15 PM
4

Looks like you gave up a good chunk of the assets you earned. Not sure why you see yourself as a winner here
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/25 03:17 AM
1

90 days is the typical time for uncontested cases. There is no way to expedite but I believe you can ask your lawyer not to be present in court during judicial review
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/25 06:06 PM
1

IT depends on what you agree to. You can always go for keeping retirement accounts separate. There is no state which forces you to sum them and share half of it.
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/25 05:53 PM
1

No idea about how trusts work in Canada, you need to talk to a lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/25 08:56 PM
2

Much better if you start attempting to fill out the court forms yourself. You'll learn much more than using AI or searches. End of the day, there are laws and there is what really happens in court.
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/25 08:54 PM
4

Wonder why this is being posted in a mens forum
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/25 01:55 AM
5

I would say definitely yes
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/25 06:42 PM
-6

Simply not, I've been advising lots of people on this forum over the years, many plan years ahead
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 07:32 PM
2

He's past that point. Already agreed to pay
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 04:17 PM
-11

This is clearly your fault if you have not tried to protect assets. We've been drumming on this forum for a long time that system is designed to loot men
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 04:16 PM
2

I've never seen date of separation being contested, but yes, if it gives you a financial advantage, then use date of filing as the date of separation, that is the default and she will have to prove otherwise
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/25 07:55 PM
1

I think you need both contract and family lawyers. I would also suggest asset protection professional. You should also be ready to roll up sleeves and DIY many court forms. I know it sounds crazy but best outcome for men (i.e. keeping what you have earned and not getting hosed through 50:50 split) really needs all these professionals
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/25 07:18 PM
1

Every state uses 50:50 formula, not sure where you are getting this 'mandatory' 50:50 from but no state has a mandatory 50:50 formula. You have to give more information on what type of asset and how much we are talking about to give better advice
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/25 06:40 PM
1

In all 50 states, the date of separation is the date you claim and is accepted or the date of filing
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/25 06:31 PM
2

Don't waste your time on these calculations, put in a large figure in your favor and negotiate from there
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/25 06:29 PM
2

I would go with marriage without certificate. Most of the 'benefits' of marriage are available without that certificate. If both of you work, there are hardly any tax advantages
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/25 05:23 PM
1

I had a whole bunch of ideas in prior years which got deleted, here is my previous post Plenty of ways to secure finances, most of them prior to things going bad 1) Post dated legal separation prior to marriage 2) Prenup prior to marriage 3) Trust prior to marriage 4) Separate financial account in another state post marriage 5) Rent from parents post marriage 6) Gifts to parents/friends post marriage 6) Trust post marriage 7) foreign residence post marriage 8) Online legal separation with no ass…
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/25 06:02 PM
2

Plenty of ways to secure finances, most of them prior to things going bad 1) Post dated legal separation prior to marriage 2) Prenup prior to marriage 3) Trust prior to marriage 4) Separate financial account in another state post marriage 5) Rent from parents post marriage 6) Gifts to parents/friends post marriage 6) Trust post marriage 7) foreign residence post marriage 8) Online legal separation with no assets disclosed post marriage 9) Strategic divorce where you keep the assets post marriage…
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/25 05:58 PM
1

I would say deny that request. Tell her you have no medical records as you never visited a physician
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/25 05:53 PM
0

Wouldn't call it much of a success at 51:49, especially if you were the one that earned most of the wealth.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/25 04:42 PM
2

Given her $70K income, less than 10yr marriage there is no default alimony. Only concern is your higher than average income of $170K, did you voluntarily disclose? Is there a variable portion to it? Do your tax returns show it as wages subject to SS? I would fight for zero alimony here, claiming the $170K income was a one off and average pay for your profession is lower
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/25 08:34 PM
4

Same men are not smart enough to get a pre-emptive legal separation
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/25 09:57 PM
2

Its a voluntary process, you don't have to cooperate
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/25 06:31 PM
4

Parents medical bills are legitimate reason for transfer. Note this is irrespective of timing, you can transfer money for legitimate reasons even during divorce. Same with any debt owed. I would not even bring this up in the divorce, simply show smaller assets on the table
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/25 04:57 PM
20

Getting a marriage certificate is a bad decision for men. Its a bad, bad deal no matter how your relationship is or the character of your woman
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/25 04:29 PM
1

Who told you marriage is meant to be a partnership? Decades of misandry and feminism have forced this definition have fooled men into accepting a very bad financial contract. This would not have happened if women got looted during divorce. In future, I expect this to change as having children will become the primary objective of marriage
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/25 09:32 PM
7

That's the problem, in 70% of marriages men earn > 90% of the wealth. 95% of the time, there is wealth transfer from man to woman. If the result was in the other direction, divorce laws would change in an instant. Everyone but the dumbest understands the misandry.
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/25 06:42 PM
7

This is exceptionally bad advice for individuals in high paying jobs or large assets to protect. It is impossible to recover financially if you've built wealth through a successful business or a one time market investment. Specially true above 40
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/25 06:40 PM
18

Not sure why you feel the need for perjury or lying. There are some very valid legal strategies like prenups, post-nups, transmutation, gifting, legal separation etc. which I am not going into. The best silver bullet is to put all assets in a trust or in some remote out of state bank and claim as separate property. Let he go through the forced discovery, expense and time of gathering everything. Delay case for a few years and her lawyer will advise her to settle for what you offer.
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/25 06:31 PM
3

Dude if you are 60+, just retire happily, cash out 401K, go to another state and file from there. Filing first is an advantage as you can prepare financially
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/25 05:33 PM
3

Its possible but rare. There were zero cases where woman were asked to pay CS in my county last year. I do see petition for reductions of CS by men and also govt taking action against women for custody violations
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/25 07:56 PM
2

Yes, you absolutely can! Its much better than a post-nup. I would also suggest a legal separation vs a post-nup. That way you retain any health insurance benefits. What you are thinking is not at all crazy and far more common than what you find online. A petition for divorce or Legal separation costs $300 and usually has an option to keep the assets under your name. If you file a month after marriage and continue living together, you will never be subject to 50-50 or alimony
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/25 08:37 PM
2

That's not accurate, the filing date represents your claim of when the community property ended, You can certainly use that or any other date you feel the community ended. However the date to use for asset split will be determined by the court. 9 out 10 times the date you claim the community ended is usually accepted by the court (contests are rare)
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/25 05:49 PM
2

Its possible to negotiate spousal support, you can definitely cash out 401K and bank account. Worst case, take a sabbatical from work, file for unemployment and then divorce. Say your income is zero and get imputed at a lower wage for spousal support
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/25 05:45 PM
5

What he means by no-fault is that the fault does not matter when it comes to dividing assets or ordering alimony.
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/25 05:22 PM
3

How exactly do you plan to bring all this into what is essentially a financial dispute to family court?
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/25 05:19 PM
1

Yes, its definitely better to get out earlier. At the very least he should file for legal separation immediately and sever the community property. Also would strongly advise him to keep finances separate irrespective of how afraid of conflict he is
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/25 09:11 PM
3

Its worse than the numbers sound as current marriage is only between high earning, educated couples. If these have to break apart at 50% rate, chances for low earners is much less
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/25 04:34 PM
2

You have to give more info like State and County, more case detail as well, if you really need help. Sounds like you made some serious errors in your filing or response
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/25 04:18 PM
3

Advise I've given before: Get a paternity test if possible, birth certificate for 16 yr old, proof his bio dad takes care of him etc. Unfortunately stats are against you, the married man is usually on hook for CS for longer term marriages. In fact 95% of CS is agreed upon during divorce. Unmarried dads are rarely hauled for CS
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/25 08:11 PM
1

Sounds like its a stretch for her to get CS in that case
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/25 07:50 PM
1

If the child resided with you during the marriage, there could be CS ordered in interest of the child. Typically the duration has to be greater than 5 years
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/25 07:23 PM
1

The general rule is if the child was born during marriage, paternity is presumed.
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/25 07:01 PM
1

File for divorce after retirement, claim your income as zero
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/25 05:02 PM
1

You should first think of yourself first. What is giving you the blazing overconfidence that you can afford $24K/yr after tax for the next twelve years?
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/25 04:23 PM
0

Flat out inaccurate, there are plenty of ways to convert community property to separate. An entire asset protection industry is built for this purpose. Just because you were not aware or your lawyer told you so, doesn't make it true
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/25 08:04 PM
0

Lawyer is definitely not a good starting point for asset protection. You should consult an asset protection professional
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/25 08:02 PM
2

Given that its 20 years and she has no job, your first concern should be not getting financially hosed in family court. You have not given your state or county but in a place like CA, you could be on the hook for lifelong alimony and CS till kids are 18 for up to 60% of your income. This is on top of any asset split she will likely get in her favor. I hope you understand you will never recover from a financial blow like this and your best bet is to avoid this outcome
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/25 06:33 PM
1

Likely to be voluntary, although lawyers will say its mandatory. Legally, the government cannot force you to disclose assets without due cause. Nearly every rich guy would be in the slammer if this were not true
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/25 04:05 AM
1

A strategic legal separation is vastly better than a post-nup. Remember the rule that you can only fight fire with fire. I don't know if legal separation is available in ND, but you should file for some sort of financial separation (give yourself a favorable asset split and no alimony), get her signature and get it stamped by the court. When you eventually divorce, this is far better then either a pre or post nup
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/25 08:59 PM
4

Discovery process is voluntary, you should never give up info on accounts at a detail level. In fact you can always say 'this account does not exist'
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/25 08:29 PM
5

Learn to be a 'man'
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/25 07:00 PM
2

Cash out or move money to bank which does not use the Chex system. Get a legal separation where you keep what you control etc. You need to secure your finances first
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/25 06:57 PM
2

Its not, he is getting hosed
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/25 09:04 PM
1

You should have tried the sabbatical route or asked to impute her income. Pay gap above $100K should always be contested during CS
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/25 09:04 PM
2

Its only two years, just list marital property as zero and get done quickly
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/25 09:36 PM
1

No country has any sharing agreement for alimony. They have tax treaties
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/25 03:39 PM
3

If you are close to retirement, best option is to put in papers and claim zero income
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/25 03:38 PM
14

This is true, its important to file first and preferably with all your finances secured
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/25 07:18 PM
1

Most of the billionaire divorces are financial agreements where spouse takes some assets and MOST liabilities and the rich dude gets most of the assets and no liabilities. Its a divorce on paper and in social media, they are still very much married in person
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/25 03:03 AM
2

Split over several years to manage tax brackets
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/25 06:52 PM
2

By sponsoring an immigrant (if you sponsored her) you are liable to pay 1.5X poverty rate till she becomes a citizen or completes 40 quarters (10 years) of paid work Divorce will not remove this obligation
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/25 04:40 PM
3

That's actually good for you, it'll delay the process but you can definitely get a better result
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/25 09:47 PM
1

Just go for 50-50 custody and try to reduce CS, why drag in a criminal case?
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/25 06:36 PM
6

You can contest and get 50% of the equity appreciation. What you've spent on mortgage payments and what she spent on upgrades have gone up in smoke. They won't be factored in the 50-50 split
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/25 03:57 PM
1

county court website --> Case Search --> Select domestic, date range --> 200 results per page
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/25 04:17 AM
4

Waste of time
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/25 12:38 AM
15

Grab as much as you can, income situation may not stay the same
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/25 10:30 PM
2

Check your county forms correctly, 32 states have options to keep assets you control in a legal separation
/r/Divorce_Men04/02/25 04:05 AM
1

You should take advantage of it. Legal separation is usually joint, so you can choose to not disclose any assets and give yourself most of the community property as well as get her to sign off on no alimony. Once you are legally separated, same terms carry over to divorce
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/25 09:18 PM
1

At this late age, why not wait till the children are over 18? After that age you don't have to include them as part of the process and CS is never discussed
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/25 10:09 PM
3

Alimony is almost completely dependent on situation at time of separation. What you did 2 or more years prior has little impact. That said, you will come out ahead in the asset split if she made more than you early on in the marriage. You should make sure she discloses all her marital assets and get at least 50% of that
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/25 06:35 PM
2

It means you start off by telling her you plan to keep all the money you earned for yourself and she will have to spend money and contest if she wants 50% of your combined wealth earned since the marriage began
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/25 01:14 AM
2

I agree with this, it was the job of states to provide relief to men
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/25 05:41 PM
1

Same thing with head of household, women are frequently awarded custody of kids and the ability to use that status, good if it gets eliminated
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/25 05:26 AM
0

The way I'm reading it, its the woman who receives CS that will lose the status, men have never been allowed to deduct CS
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/25 05:21 AM
0

You are not paying alimony to the Republican party, you are paying your ex!
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/25 05:14 AM
0

I read it the other way, marry and don't sign the certificate is what's being encouraged
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/25 05:13 AM
1

Article fails to mention, you can preemptively file for legal separation and use single status. I fail to see how this is a partisan issue, most men don't plan financially for a divorce, no prenups, no trusts, no regular gifts to parents, no preemptive legal separation to eliminate alimony etc. No, we won't do any of that, we will use married filing jointly always, have both our names on the mortgage and always buy a house, we will never do prenups, agree to whatever our lawyer tells us, sign up…
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/25 05:10 AM
10

I would teach boys to not sign the marriage certificate
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/25 08:30 PM
1

This is why I suggest not disclosing income and claiming unemployment. You can ask for a reduction from the stipulated amount
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/25 07:15 PM
3

He is perhaps on the only internet forum where he can get advice on how to avoid splitting marital property 50:50. Most other place he will get canned advice about adding all assets and giving her 50%
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/25 12:50 AM
3

You need a trust and a legal separation to keep assets you control. Your mistake is filing taxes jointly. Start filing taxes separately, change bank accounts, use the trust and get the legal separation. You would be really dumb to hand her $1.5M
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/25 12:43 AM
1

Would depend on $ amount of debt, but general rule is its a waste of time going to court and chasing owed money from out of state ex
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/25 08:40 PM
20

Financial distress is a good reason to ask for reduction in CS,
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/25 02:42 PM
2

Is this really FL? No permanent alimony and CS only $300/month, what a miracle!
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/25 02:17 PM
2

That's one way to handle it, call BS and hope they are scared enough to comply
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/25 09:26 PM
3

Discovery requests or even forced disclosure by court can always be responded to by a 'couldn't locate document'.
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/25 05:01 AM
4

I would absolutely not recommend this course of action unless you are sure of intentional fraud. I found just one employer subpoena in the past 5 years and that case dragged on for 3 years with the employer responding after a year. The entire divorce process is de-facto voluntary, you disclose your income and assets and she does the same. You mutually agree on a split and get it approved by the court. If you want to save $$, you should also be disclosing less and letting her attempt a forced dis…
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/25 05:00 AM
1

You can do plenty to protect your assets, depending on your state, there may be an option for online legal separation, post-nup, opening bank account in non Chex out of state bank, offshore account, trusts (high net worth), gifts to parents, renting from parents, gifts to adult children, refi home at high interest rate and use cash, crypto, crypto+offshore, offshore business, purchase rental property in relatives name etc
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/25 06:44 PM
1

Same advice as given to others, FL has option to not disclose assets, make first offer to her saying you keep what you have earned and see if she signs. Do not use a lawyer, try to do it on your own
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/25 07:09 PM
2

Very easy to do so in many US states. Check your county court website for the forms needed. Many states have introduced online option, no financial disclosure or court appearance these days. Just fill in the forms, pay ~$300, get her to sign (somehow), file online, wait for 3 (or more months), use court facilitator for final decree and you are done!
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/25 05:23 PM
2

You can do plenty to protect your assets, depending on your state, there may be an option for online legal separation, post-nup, opening bank account in non Chex out of state bank, offshore account, trusts (high net worth), gifts to parents, renting from parents, gifts to adult children, refi home at high interest rate and use cash, crypto, crypto+offshore, offshore business, purchase rental property in relatives name etc.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/25 05:06 PM
1

Luckily CA is not TX!
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/25 10:37 PM
1

You are in luck, most CA counties have online legal separation. Even better, in CA you don't need to visit the court or be informed of decisions for legal separation if the filing is joint. Legal separation form has a box to check where each spouse can keep assets they currently control. So use this form, get two signatures from her. File online, pay fees, get legal separation approved by court with each spouse awarded asset they control. Forget and ignore every other comment posted here
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/25 10:36 PM
2

Why are you agreeing to pay CS? It should be the minimum, court mandated amount along with any adjustment you get for parental time, insurance etc. Oregon (similar to WA) has an option to decline spousal support when filing. Make sure you file jointly with that option checked. She cannot ask for alimony once she declines it and the court approves it
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/25 01:53 AM
2

"What do I need to do to prove that I have been separated for at least a year? Your truthful testimony to the court, under oath, can prove your separation. You can also present other witnesses or documents. A separation agreement between you and your spouse can be helpful to show the court." Can You Avoid the Waiting Period in North Carolina? Unfortunately, there is no legal way to avoid this divorce requirement in North Carolina, though there may be exceptions. Some choose to falsely claim that…
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/25 01:35 AM
1

For all practical purposes, there is no difference
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/25 01:21 AM
2

In FL, you can do even better, there is no requirement to even list assets in case of amicable divorce. This was passed along with lifetime alimony modification couple years ago
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/25 10:15 PM
5

Never agree to any modification unless you can make money out of it
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/25 10:13 PM
6

Who paid the mortgage does not matter, you have to calculate home equity and divide by 2 and pay her that portion. As others have suggested, get it valued as low as possible and give her the lowest possible, low ball figure
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/25 10:11 PM
1

For short marriages, you can always claim zero marital property, irrespective of gain or loss of pre marital assets. You have not mentioned state or county, but I would suggest putting zero marital assets during disclosure
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/25 10:07 PM
1

Yes, many court forms have option to award the spouse any asset they currently control. Key here is to not use lawyers
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/25 08:51 PM
2

Yes, the advice is for those who own the home (or the title). If you leave, you may be ordered to pay mortgage while she lives there for free (may take several years), then you get a another haircut when asked to give portion of equity. Renting is actually super smart for divorce. You should look to break the lease and rent another place just for yourself. Also don't pay any CS voluntarily, make her go through the motions including forced disclosure if necessary. Tell her you'll pay nothing and …
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/24 07:31 AM
1

Yes, you absolutely have plenty of ways to protect finances. Here are some ideas, ordered by most effective to least effective 1) Legal separation filed online (get her signatures somehow on the last page) 2) Gift assets to family members 3) Move your assets into a trust 4) Move assets offshore 5) Move assets to local bank that does not use Chex in another state 6) Post nup agreement 7) Cash under mattress not declared is yours etc.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/24 07:23 PM
1

Its possible but you'll have to go Pro se
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/24 07:14 PM
3

Never agree to pay more than minimum and even for the minimum make sure she has to fight for every cent of it
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/24 07:14 PM
2

Correct, you are still responsible if she doesn't pay and there is no way around it unless she refi's and settles your mortgage.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/24 07:11 PM
3

Quit claim deed. Lender has to agree though
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/24 10:40 PM
1

Strategic legal separation, dissolve marital community but continue being married legally
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/24 08:59 PM
2

You need to look into asset protection and pro se legal separation, that's your exit plan, save your assets and see how you can pay zero to her
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/24 10:56 PM
5

NEVER!!
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/24 10:54 PM
1

Depends on how you handle it, you have to ask the Judge to impute her income and be ready to say you cannot support her. Your lawyer will not do it for you
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/24 04:36 AM
2

Another recommendation I had in that thread is to gift $$ to your parents, have them buy the house (willed to you) and you and new wife rent the house at above market rate. This way a big chunk of marital earnings goes to your parents and all the house appreciation is excluded from marital property. Post divorce, take it all back from parents or get it as separate property through inheritance.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/24 04:09 PM
1

Its fairly standard to put most assets into a trust prior to marriage if you have > $5M. Not sure what you mean by 'bury' but you control what you put in a trust, without legally owning it.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/24 03:45 PM
5

NOW for the three critical steps needed to keep assets separate after marriage (Bookmark this, you will not find it anywhere else and moderator will likely remove, as it may bankrupt the divorce industry) Prior to marriage,ask a family member, typically a parent to make you the beneficiary of an irrevocable trust. Put any and every asset you have acquired prior to marriage in the trust. All gifts and inheritance go into the trust. The trust should not pay you during marriage. By definition, a tr…
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/24 02:48 AM
2

I see that most of my useful comments were deleted (I can guess by who). Here is a summary of options from previous years, I didn't know about legal separation back then. That's the easiest, just go to Santa Clara County and get the Legal Separation form, fill in with option to keep assets you control (no need to declare finances) and check option that you do not need to be notified of court decision. Get her signature on last page (tactfully), file online, pay fees and the court approves after …
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/24 02:47 AM
2

They won't and she will sign the agreement, if presented properly long before divorce, which is a two page form saying each spouse keeps the assets they control. This has happened in both WA and CA
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/24 12:12 AM
3

Its the price you decided to pay for freedom, not looking at other options is a big mistake for HNW
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/24 07:33 PM
1

That's his best bet; someone outside the family court system. Pro Se or DIY is actually a great option for asset protection during divorce. He has to be specific in asking questions though, ex. Is legal separation better than a prenup? Can legal separation be used like a prenup? Is the wife's signature all that is needed for legal separation?
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/24 05:36 PM
2

Those lawyers will not tell him as they don't work for him. Lawyers work for the family court system and will not work on a case to 'protect someone's assets'
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/24 05:21 PM
6

LoL, anything above $10M has plenty of options Pro se online legal separation; get two signatures from her on legal separation form. Check option to not disclose assets and giving each spouse financial assets they currently control Open an onshore or offshore trust; gift assets to trust Gifts to charity or relatives: Remove assets from marital property, make gift above $64K and report on tax return next year As you are in California, get her signature on a transmutation agreement Someone suggest…
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/24 05:17 PM
1

Not sure which state and county you are in or what income CS is being calculate on. The general rule is to always go with LOWEST CS possible. If required, quit your job and let them compute income for CS. You never want to pay more CS than the minimum required as its the ONLY state mandated and government enforced payment. Everything else you negotiate, alimony, asset split, custody etc. is a voluntary negotiation and agreement. There is also very poor or no enforcement mechanism to ensure anyth…
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/24 03:24 AM
3

Getting legal separation where I keep all assets controlled by me. Its a simple step to retain all your assets you earned. Listening to fools saying 50:50 is the law which you have to follow is a mistake
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/24 12:00 AM
1

Its average of 3 years in TX, hopefully you did not show pay stubs with a variable commission as that will get included in CS income
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/24 06:38 PM
0

Abuse has zero impact in financial settlement. The financial settlement will most likely be 50% of of what you and wife list as community property. The more you disclose as community property the more you will lose. You have to pursue abuse charges separately
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/24 06:33 PM
2

Job loss is a valid reason for inability to provide insurance. Inability to comply with a court order due to something beyond your control is never penalized by court. Have the required documentation including termination letter, payslip, exit checklist and employer reference. Let her provide insurance
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/24 06:11 PM
2

Doesn't matter in my county, its online
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/24 05:39 AM
1

Unfortunately for both CS and alimony, getting a modification is harder as you have to prove she is employed and find out her paycheck.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/24 06:15 PM
1

In TX the max is 2.3K/month even for Elon Musk. I would say work informally with your higher paying ex to take on more childcare expenses. Hopefully your income goes up and 2.3K seems insignificant.
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/24 10:31 PM
2

The ask for reduced alimony should always be preceded by a reduction in your income. The most painless way to do this is take a sabbatical (or temporary unpaid leave from your employer) and present to court as a permanent and unchangeable reduction in income. I saw a comment here about Gavron warning. Be aware, I could not find a single case in 2023 in Santa Clara county where this warning was issued. The state of CA has never asked ex-wives to find employment.
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/24 10:28 PM
2

The law is gender neutral but Judicial discretion usually favors the woman.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/24 07:06 PM
6

This sounds about right if she does not work. That is why I strongly suggest preemptive legal separation soon after marriage
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/24 04:53 AM
-4

Wouldn't an easier solution be to make CS voluntary?
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/24 12:06 AM
3

There is nothing like 'illegal' when it comes to marital assets. If the divorce is not final, all marital assets can be used 'fully and completely' by either spouse. After filing for divorce, there is usually a temporary order for financial restraint, but violating this order and cashing out marital assets is not 'illegal'. Its just something you have to settle with her
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/24 08:57 PM
0

For Men: Divorce is always the best decision!!
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/24 01:05 AM
1

There is nothing in the law which forces you to provide info they ask for
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/24 05:24 PM
2

Glad to see some good advice on this column
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/24 05:23 PM
1

One strategy you can try. Take a sabbatical from your current job, tell the court you have no income and cannot get a similar paying job. Let the judge impute your income from prior three years AND the knowledge you are currently unemployed. Ask the judge to impute HER income. You need to make the case that her imputed income is greater than yours. Alimony will be lowest if this works
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/24 06:25 PM
4

Any prenup, legal separation agreement, transfer to parents etc. or did you marry blind? In WI, the co-habitation or cheating generally does not matter. Its probably too late to do anything now but your state provides online legal separation for keeping assets and income separate after marriage
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/24 06:18 PM
2

She has to pay the accountant and its still a private, unofficial party which the court may disregard. Family court is not equipped to handle financial issues
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/24 05:31 PM
2

That is exactly the idea, let the wife go and get that forced disclosure, let her go and argue for lawyer fees and absolutely let her try to get that contempt judgement. I have done my research here, less than 0.1% of the cases go this route and her legal fees and time rack up 100X your DIY effort. The case also drags on for years and if the man is primary earner, she is forced to settle
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/24 05:29 PM
2

What you are saying is true for finances already disclosed. If you say account does not exist, they cannot penalize you for not providing a financial statement, at least that's how it works in WA
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/24 08:15 PM
-1

Alimony is definitely judicial discretion, financial disclosure is not. The husband not revealing assets will not result in a penalty to him, simply because the asset will not be put forward as community property and there is no way for family court to figure out the $$ amount without your cooperation.
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/24 06:56 PM
1

It is normal only because lawyers tell you so to make their job easy, nothing in the law compels you to cooperate.
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/24 06:53 PM
0

Its a valid response to an order, you won't be held in contempt of court. There is definitely no jail or fine, simply because there is no law saying you need to save all your financial statements. The other party, aka wife needs to prove you are lying or hiding things, the judge won't make the decision for them
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/24 06:51 PM
-4

This is exactly the place you want to be, nothing should be disclosed and she should be forced to obtain all info through court orders and forced disclosure from third parties. Most times this leads to the best financial outcome for men
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/24 04:24 PM
-5

She cannot 'force you' to disclose anything. She needs to approach the court and present evidence, the court will then ask you to cooperate, you can say 'statement not available', she will again need to approach court to contact financial (or CC company). The court will have to then determine if its prudent to ask CC company to hand over info. Its EXTREMELY rare for a third party financial institution to be forced to hand over info in a divorce case this way
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/24 04:21 PM
0

There is no time limit and your compliance is completely voluntary. In fact I suggest all men say that its impossible to get any financial info due to stress and let the wife's side try and attempt forced disclosure of assets
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/24 10:12 PM
2

The VA loan is yours to keep, any house appreciation equity will have to be split with her. Custody is simple, you have to provide 50% free childcare to her and pay CS. She gets to make all the major decisions related to children
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/24 05:45 PM
1

If you've spent more than a couple years researching court procedures and advising people, then you can easily represent yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/24 05:01 PM
1

You don't need her consent, check my other comment, the timing is key
/r/Divorce_Men30/11/24 06:09 PM
1

This is a very good idea, refinance the house and give a huge $ gift to your mother. If its several months prior to filing divorce, its very tough for her to file for dissipation of assets. Refinance, give your mom a gift, stay in the house for 8 months, then file. She will have a very tough time getting anything back. People will tell you there is no legal way to do it and that is also correct. Its very similar to illegals voting in elections, its not legal but there are no checks and punishmen…
/r/Divorce_Men30/11/24 06:08 PM
2

Most of TMOFR language (temporary motion for financial restraint) is not enforceable as the assets belong to you (and wife). Heck, the best advice I have given men is to simply not disclose any assets the wife is not aware of and let her contest and prove it. Surprisingly less than 1 in 100 cases go the forced disclosure route
/r/Divorce_Men30/11/24 06:05 PM
1

Without proof of service, the case is invalid, this is true for all court cases not just family court. Yes, you can prolong the case by making it difficult for her to serve you
/r/Divorce_Men30/11/24 06:00 PM
7

She should get nothing. That being said, you have to file EVERY form showing assets as separate, zero equity appreciation, zero marital assets etc. You have to show that every cent earned during marriage was spent in the past 3 years. Get DNA test and BC of child and be ready to contest any CS ask
/r/Divorce_Men27/11/24 08:50 PM
4

You have a very bad deal
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/24 04:43 AM
2

This is accurate, OP has cut himself a terrible deal and is trying to cope by saying 'I love the children'
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/24 04:42 AM
1

There are plenty of advantages 1) Someone already mentioned protection orders, its really a huge benefit to setting a date and arguing for/against an OP. 2) You get to decide what assets and income are marital and which are separate, she gets to contest 3) You get a chance to stash cash under the pillow, open out of state bank account, close 401K etc. All the financial moves to protect assets are yours, she has to struggle and contest. 4) Far easier to DIY if you file first, responding to an ons…
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/24 10:00 PM
4

Run away to Costa Rica, Mexico also works
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/24 05:32 AM
1

There is really not much you can do in family court. The tax fraud is a separate issue and if I am correct, merely forging a signature does not invite harsh punishment. The other issue you have raised, how to split the refund in a joint return is definitely not enforceable in court. One spouse can completely use another spouse refund without penalty.
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/24 05:16 PM
3

Its standard, even simple motion to continue or changing trial date are separate fees. This is how attorneys make money and is why I advice men to DIY. Its a great strategy to run the other party out of money and ask her to settle for peanuts
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/24 04:19 PM
1

I see Fair_Marriage forum was banned, so you'll have to go through my previous posts
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/24 03:41 PM
2

Wow! US states offering online legal separation are such a blessing
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/24 04:27 PM
2

Marital home equity is always split 50-50, only way around is a trust or strategic legal separation. Your post-nup will be deemed invalid.
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/24 05:47 PM
1

Pretty old case, since then 34 states have implemented some form of legal separation where no asset disclosure is needed. If you are really worried about protecting assets, all it takes is getting her to sign twice on two forms
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/24 06:01 AM
1

$5M for Domestic Trust, $10M for Offshore, these are the amounts quoted by financial institutions
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/24 05:59 AM
2

DIY while disclosing nothing is the best
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/24 05:58 AM
2

Yes, most people I've advised have not disclosed financials their spouse won't know about. The court expects you to settle on a $ amount they can stamp. Its not the IRS or dept of treasury to investigate finances. Whatever is disclosed will be split, anything hidden will become separate property.
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/24 05:52 AM
2

TRO is just a bargaining chip in the final divorce. The prize is marital assets. If you save those, the TRO will eventually get dropped
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/24 12:27 AM
1

Isn't easier at your age to simple retire, take your money and move to another state/country? If you don't have a salaried income, house and kids, there is not much the government can (or will) do to you.
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/24 08:42 PM
4

Not sure which county in GA, but home equity could be high, so that's the only asset you want to get more of. The others seem small and not worth fighting over
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/24 08:40 PM
2

Depends on how much 50% is but if a lot of money is involved, its not possible to recover financially. Its a crippling, permanent blow to your life. This is why I suggest you use 'every possible tool' during financial discovery and throughout the divorce process to remove assets out of marital property
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/24 05:46 PM
5

Its not just the court, the laws themselves are written to favor women. Why did you not take the advice on this forum and hide or not disclose assets and income when you filed for divorce? In all 50 states, family courts depend on voluntary disclosure of assets and income and cannot order the government to investigate. This is a big difference between the US and other countries
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/24 11:37 PM
4

Don't agree to pay, tell her your employer does not offer an option and there is no way to pay marketplace rate
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/24 05:23 PM
3

Your primary residence is always considered marital property by default. In fact the idea of community property came about with the intent of not driving the woman out of the house during divorce. Therefore leaving your primary residence means you'll have to continue paying for it. Its quite easy for her to get a temporary order asking you to continue payment. This will also supersede any agreement you may have made with her.
/r/Divorce_Men01/11/24 08:34 PM
3

In most states, one year is the reasonable limit to challenge a decree. Even within the year you need proper grounds to contest. Beyond the one year mark, there is heavy burden on whoever is contesting. This is true for both legal separation and divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/24 05:43 PM
2

You are in a good spot, the post-nup should protect assets like stocks and bank accounts. However 401K and retirement can be contested even with post-nup, you are better off getting larger share of assets and asking for 50-50 split in 401K and retirement
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 05:35 PM
1

You should pretty much stop paying anything for her, temp support arrangements are usually made permanent and its important to show spousal support is not required for her current lifestyle
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 03:53 AM
7

You can always say not applicable, not available or not relevant to any discovery request. You need to understand your rights. This is not an inquisition. Its their job to discover any asset they think you may have hidden, not your job to help them find it. I really hope you were smart enough to hide something!
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 03:08 AM
2

You have to get a private test done ASAP. Its not your state law, its clearly mentioned on the form when you file or respond. You hopefully contested during the response
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/24 11:49 PM
1

ok, didn't realize its was the UK. Europe has more 'equal marriages', so 50-50 is OK.You can probably depend on the govt for retirement as well. Very different situation in the US
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/24 09:38 PM
2

There is really no way to get back to where you were. This is why I have been advising men never to agree for 50-50 and do what it takes to keep your money. For ex. lets say you have saved $2M by 47, lose half of that in divorce, plus $200K in other expenses like fees, alimony, CS etc. You are left with $800K and 20 years to retire. At 7% return you have ~$3M at retirement. If you kept the $2M you have $7.6M or close to $8M. Its not easy to make additional $5M given labor market discrimination a…
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/24 08:27 PM
2

MY suggestion is you go for a DIY legal separation which can be handled online. You can tell her its simply a way to save on taxes and put the family on a better finances.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/24 07:42 PM
5

Never leave primary marital residence. Also why are you using the word 'partner'? Are you legally married?
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/24 08:08 PM
1

No, you can always ask court to reevaluate after any change in finances
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/24 09:47 PM
3

You can ask court to reduce, so it will reduce
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 11:20 PM
1

Ask for reduction in alimony as well
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 11:19 PM
2

The worst you can do is 1) Talking to a lawyer 2) Accepting 50-50 is the only option Giving up way before the fight starts is the best way to get defeated
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 08:30 PM
0

As you are in California, your best option is a strategic legal separation. This means you are dissolving the community property but will remain legally married. You can e-file with option to keep assets you control, next remove her name from the house title, in the legal separation form say the house is separate property. Open bank account only in your name and transfer all your money there. Do not list this account in the legal separation form. Get her signature and e-file, you should be good
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 08:08 PM
0

100% inaccurate, there is clean discrimination against men. Women pay alimony less than 3% of the time while men pay 97% of the time. Lawyers openly advise men to forget prenups while openly telling women to use every prenup clause favorable to them
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 06:36 PM
4

I would do a 'certificate free' marriage, i.e. have a ceremony but file taxes as single
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 03:05 PM
1

It depends on the state, but usually date of separation should be mentioned in the petition, that is the date used (if not contested)
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/24 07:05 PM
16

You can ask for a lot of money, don't hold back, ask her for 50% of her $300K every year for life. Also make sure you ask for everything you spent on her education
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/24 07:03 PM
1

Think I've posted comments worth an entire book on this, There are countless ways including simple gifts, cash under mattress, purchase from friend, opening offshore account etc. The lawyers will of course threaten to find everything, its all bark and no bite. The disclosure process is mostly voluntary
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/24 02:16 PM
1

Give me some good ways without breaking the law
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/24 02:14 PM
3

For higher income and education the rate is around 15%. However this is 15 times or 1500% increase from 1980! It shows how severe the crisis is, given its impact on a social group where divorce was unheard
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/24 02:12 PM
-6

At this age, is it not better for nature to do the separation?
/r/Divorce_Men30/09/24 10:47 PM
3

Ask for a lot more than what is recommended
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/24 04:51 AM
1

None of the evidence matters, however if he discloses all his income and assets, he will lose it
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/24 03:27 PM
2

If you are legally married, there are zero laws that prevent you from taking the kids anywhere you want without the mother's permission. This probably is the only benefit of marriage to men. Her only option is to try and dissolve the marriage and ask for 50:50 custody.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/24 03:25 PM
11

Women do depend on male relationships for a lot of things in exchange for babies. That is just biology and not much you can do about it
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/24 01:52 AM
3

If she sponsored your GC then she is on the hook to support you till you work in the US for 10 years or become a USC. Tell her if she divorces, you'll stop working and ask her to provide permanent support
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 09:09 PM
-1

Primary custody is usually given to the mother, she gets to make all life choice decisions for the child. You'll be asked to provide free childcare for 50% of the time on top of CS payments to her
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 07:48 PM
-1

You are the one that will pay CS, though it will be a reduced amount.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 07:26 PM
7

Do not contact or talk her in any way, just wait for court orders
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 04:02 PM
7

OMG, sounds like you are 200% simping to every wish of hers! She doesn't want children and you agreed? Who on earth would give up a child and family for no good reason. She wanted to travel, so you 'married' to give her a visa. Again a major concession getting absolutely nothing in return. You didn't divorce in Norway because you didn't want to screw 'her chances'. Let me tell you something, if this goes to family court, all your sacrifices will be in vain and she will go after every $ and every…
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 09:23 PM
10

Date and have all the fun you want, just don't marry
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 04:23 PM
2

I don't think there is much you can do legally. You should ask for a reimbursement and see how that goes. She can always make up a BS excuse on why she sold the asset
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 02:33 PM
1

You are unlikely to meet someone like that. Better try to control those female hormones you mentioned with your masculinity and her cortisol
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 05:31 PM
1

You should file immediately and say the marriage broke down within 5 months
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 03:40 PM
11

At that age, why bother, just continue living separately. I would simply gift any inheritance to heirs right away and continue on SS and retirement.
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 01:58 AM
1

I would say file jointly and claim 0 marital property. IF she has a job, its a waste of time trying to figure out 401k appreciation in 2 years and then deducting for taxes, lawyer fees, discovery etc. The amount will be too small
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/24 06:52 PM
1

I love Texas!
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/24 06:36 PM
2

Pretty sure Texas has a cap at around 3K for CS for 3 kids, think its 1.8K for one kid. This was one reason Elon Musk moved there. In California it would be a % of his $54BN pay, in Texas its a few thousand!
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/24 06:33 PM
1

Ego and apology are small price to pay for children and grandchildren. If you apologize and submit now everything will be OK in 5 years as he will come out of his phase. If you go through divorce, it will impact your children and grandchildren
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/24 05:22 PM
4

That is basic female nature. Most traditional cultures enforce discipline on girls by making them cook, clean and look after others. Sacrifice among women was celebrated earlier. Modern western culture has changed that and told girls to pursue money and happiness for themselves
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/24 05:05 PM
3

From a legal standpoint, no. You have made several mistakes 1) Agreeing to pay child support vs. being ordered 2) Voluntary disclosure of income and name of employer 3) Agreeing to garnishment of wages and not objecting 4) Paying for half of after school activities.
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/24 05:21 PM
0

Then you should apologize and go back. Divorce has very bad impact on the man and the children. They will suffer for generations
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/24 05:02 PM
1

Usually men are the support and anchor of families. Both wife and children depend on him for emotional support and they provide it selflessly. However in the US, there are stresses in work with job uncertainty, children's schools place large burden on dads and wife's nag them to buy large houses they are not comfortable with. They won't admit if they are asked directly, but I would suggest tagging along and not arguing with any decision he makes. Let him send flowers or whatever at work, he is n…
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/24 03:35 PM
0

It shouldn't matter, they can always give it back through inheritance
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 04:54 PM
1

If you set up a trust prior to marriage it can only have separate assets. If it gets funded (or changed) during marriage, it is considered marital property.
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 03:11 PM
0

This used to be the thinking till around 2010 in family courts, however when I analyzed recent cases, the court is restricting itself to dividing assets. In fact we have e-filing available with forms explicitly stating asset division. They are not questioning how the assets were acquired or if a third party has a benefit from marital property. You may not like to hear it and you may not believe it, but courts expect women to be aware of contracts they are signing, including rental contracts and …
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 03:10 PM
0

That is why I advise against trusts
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 01:14 PM
1

Yes, you need to trust your parents and they should be reliable for this to work. That is why I keep transacting financially with my son. I know he will fall for someone after college and I want to protect him in that situation. The real estate gift is taxable only beyond $27M ($13M if single) but most people are below that
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 04:38 AM
0

You are wrong, there is no legal or financial obligation between parents and grown children unlike a spouse or dependent children. If marital property is used to transact with parents, there is no way to get it back. You also fail to see the couple is living in the house during marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 03:39 AM
1

Excellent idea!
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 03:11 AM
0

Try telling that to a 20 year old horny boy in love. Also men don't wise up until they face family court, that is why as parents we should make proper arrangements to prevent their sons from getting devastated by their mistake
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 03:07 AM
1

This is flatly inaccurate, while researching the topic I consulted with a mortgage lender who told me its illegal to discriminate based on age for any type of property purchase. A mortgage is a secured loan and at most they can ask you to purchase additional insurance
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 03:03 AM
3

You are dead wrong here. I have discussed with three attorneys. Renting a marital residence is 100% valid use of marital property, if this enriches a third party (landlord who happens to be the parent) there is simply no legal way to get it back. The third party is NOT involved in the marriage and cannot be asked to refund. What assets are there to divide? The house belongs to the parents and so does all his money
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 03:00 AM
1

In the US, its the eastern states and CA
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 12:13 AM
1

What do you mean by 'correctly written trust'? Any fool can put separate assets into a trust and claim its bulletproof. The challenge arises when Marital funds are put into the trust. The competence of your lawyer makes not difference, its the law that is the problem
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 12:07 AM
0

Your logic is screwed and entitled. She is getting to stay in a big house for 50% rent. Its a much better life than she would have were she single. Also she is likely to get alimony and CS if there are no assets to split
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 08:55 PM
7

Feel free, my knowledge and ideas are for everyone
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 06:36 PM
3

Not sure why women are on this forum as they seem to be living on another planet when it comes to marriage and money. Men earn 70 cents of every marital $ income and generate 93 cents of every marital $ wealth. Women SPEND 60 cents of every marital $. These numbers have moved sharply away from 60-40 income split in 2003. You can argue on what's fair or not when women actually begin to lose money in divorce
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 06:03 PM
0

Just tell her its best for both to agree to file jointly and online preferably. No significant marital assets to divide, no children and most likely zero spousal support. Ignore hostile communication
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 04:37 PM
6

Some states specify that trusts funded with marital property should be on the table during divorce
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 04:06 PM
2

Above $27M, there is a gift tax. Luckily most people are below that threshold
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 04:01 PM
4

Thanks I've talked to three and advice has been unanimous, Renting a house takes it off the table during divorce. This is unlike a trust which may be contested. It does depend on you having a good relationship with your parents/sibling etc. My experience has been to trust my family vs the government
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 03:22 AM
-1

I can also understand this will be highly upsetting to most entitled women
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 03:18 AM
1

I think you have been brainwashed by feminist media. You can absolutely be a safe driver and purchase expensive car insurance. They are not mutually exclusive
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 02:41 AM
7

They sometimes don't work for men and are mostly good at preventing co-mingling of separate property. However they are a good first layer of defense
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 01:15 AM
7

That's another layer of protection if you want more security. However I couldn't find a single case where the wife has attempted to sue her in-laws during divorce
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 12:38 AM
2

That's an easy solution but my advice it to those who want to give it an honest try
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 12:33 AM
7

I've talked to multiple lawyers, its always best to have multiple layers of protection while marrying. A prenup should always be first layer but it can be contested, set aside or conflict with 50-50 in state law
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 12:30 AM
3

Yes, you can object to the subpoena or close the account before the court hearing. You should not have complied with any of their requests without a court order and even in case of a court order provide limited or zero information after continuous objection
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 12:09 AM
0

Yes, timing is key, its perfectly legal to make any money moves prior to an order for financial restraints.
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/24 03:16 PM
2

Open a bank account in another state. Preferably a local bank which does not use the Chex system. Cash out some money and put under mattress. Most importantly do not disclose anything, let them do the discovery and spend the $$
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/24 02:14 PM
2

You need to stop feeling guilty first. Having something online 5 years ago is making you feel guilty? It shows the impact of brainwashing men are subject to. Look to the future, if this goes to court, be ready to save your $$ more than anything else
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/24 02:11 PM
2

Usually half is given, in your case she is still working, so easy to argue you need the money and pension to survive. I would suggest putting about $100K of that cash in local bank another state
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/24 03:23 AM
4

Why don't they feel the same when they marry without a 'certificate'? Why don't they feel the same when the man insists on prenup+ strategic legal separation? I think they are opportunistic, simply using the law when it favors them. It has nothing to do with fairness or falling out of love.
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 10:41 PM
8

Why do they feel entitled to 50% of marital assets in that case? If its only an image they fell in love with, they should be OK taking none of the man's money
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 06:16 PM
10

Not in WA state, there is no court ordered extension. Even for CS, there is an income limit, not sure why you are paying more
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/24 04:24 AM
1

Did you file taxes separately? If yes, you can respond to attorney saying tax return was never filed. Small bank account transactions should be the only info disclosed, that too from a bank without direct deposit or a bank which received on a few hundred $$ as direct deposit out of your bigger paycheck. Its unfortunate, but I see men go to court completely unprepared. You should prepare for at least 3 years
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 07:13 PM
-1

How did they verify your income? Did you voluntarily submit your W2? One of the best strategies that has worked in WA is to file taxes separately for a few years, then apply for legal separation. If contested claim an income which does not need a tax filing. There is zero way for the state of WA to verify as there is no income tax in WA and you have data privacy laws which prevent your employer from disclosing
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 07:04 PM
2

Given that you are in WA, an easy option would have been to get her signature (informally) on legal separation, PTLGSP and e-file. You can choose option saying assets already divided and each spouse keeps what they control. You can even check option to not be communicated of court decision. Then you file with help of court facilitators and you get all assets you earned with no alimony
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 05:15 PM
2

This is an excellent opportunity for you to eliminate alimony and reduce CS. Wait for 2 months, apply for unemployment benefits, then file for modification. Tell the court its impossible for you to find any job despite searching frantically for over a year. Show drained bank accounts, claim you are close to bankruptcy, get certificate from doctor claiming mental stress etc.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 12:13 AM
3

At least in the US if both spouses earn the same, the husband is presumed to be earning below potential and is sometimes asked to pay alimony and/or larger share of assets. There are also several states where primary custody and child support are awarded to the mother and father is asked to care for the child 50% of the time
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 07:02 PM
6

You can't explain, just ask for more, also ask for 401K and alimony. Family courts are outright feminist, so expect to get less than what you ask for
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 05:28 PM
3

Don't you want to separate your finances, get a legal separation and get out of the marital property law? I can understand you continuing your marriage but doing so without protecting your money is just foolish. Noticed you are in EUR region, so the laws may be different, in the US, I would definitely look to split finances
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 05:23 PM
2

I couldn't think of a single scenario where you want non modifiable. Given how remarkably incompetent family courts are in verifying employment, a simple sabbatical should eliminate or reduce alimony
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/24 11:54 PM
1

What exactly is the question here? In general you should never agree to 'non modifiable alimony'. If you have a job that is not secure (which is the majority of jobs these days), you should argue for zero alimony by taking a sabbatical and claiming its impossible to find a job that pays you the same.
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/24 08:57 PM
3

Nope, any joint agreement even at 100-0 asset split with 50 year marriage is stamped, this includes no alimony. Only CS is calculated by formula
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 09:16 PM
9

No, they won't enforce alimony. Any joint agreement is simply stamped
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 09:12 PM
0

That's right, preferably without a lawyer, there is an option where you can check 'each spouse keeps the assets they control', that way no finances need to be disclosed
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 05:07 AM
-1

Did you declare the income from your S-Corp? Do not do so if she cannot access your tax returns. Don't waste your time in mediation,I would suggest filing jointly and keeping what is yours
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 01:16 AM
-5

This is not true, there mere fact that you did not go for a good prenup and legal separation when you got married, tells me you are financially irresponsible and did not insure your wealth against divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 01:07 AM
2

Its a short term marriage. I doubt your house has appreciated much over the last couple years. Just claim you have zero marital property, no assets to divide and everything is separate property.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 04:46 PM
3

I would say its the other way round, prenup and legal separation is absolutely vital to young couples as men make 99% of marital wealth. For older couples, their pre-marriage wealth is treated separate.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 04:11 PM
6

Even if she does not want your money now, she will WANT it during divorce. EVERY SINGLE TIME! When the government forces you to buy liability car insurance for < 1% chance of accident, why not force yourself to get LEGAL SEPARATION along with the marriage certificate? I have highlighted legal separation as this option offers the best protection vs. a prenup Your thinking on future divorce is exactly the reason men lose their shirts in family court. You should plan on leaving your wife completely…
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 03:50 PM
3

However if you find out your wife is cheating, you first step should be to separate assets, use asset protection, get no alimony legal separation and THEN file for divorce. Most men rush in emotionally and file straight away, that is why we have this problem
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/24 06:00 PM
5

You'll also see how little the truth is valued
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/24 05:16 PM
2

2% in my county
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/24 05:15 PM
8

Most of the factors women initiate divorce for like feeling insecure, incomplete, stressed, better deal etc. are beyond the control of modern men. Cheating alone is rarely a factor. I can say with certainty, most divorces these days have absolutely nothing to do with the man
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/24 05:13 PM
2

search online for legal help
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/24 03:55 AM
2

Yes, you will share the burden. I see comments related to dower state, which mostly don't apply during divorce in Nebraska. All states have shifted to marital property, ie. anything acquired after marriage is deemed community property
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/24 08:07 PM
1

The entire family court system, lawyers, girl dads, feminists and most politicians will oppose this
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/24 07:17 PM
1

Big changes in law since these comments were made. Legal separation is binding on assets and alimony
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 12:45 AM
2

He can't do that with current family court set up
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/24 03:50 PM
-8

How did you find yourself in this situation? Six dependents and a legal contract that asks you to support them. The first thing you need to tell your wife is that you won't be supporting her or the kids financially if she goes to court.
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/24 02:15 PM
3

Yes, its worth the fight. The way I see it, its a whole year's paycheck
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/24 02:11 PM
1

Don't know what you mean by that. Make sure you know what you want from your lawyer, i.e. preserving assets, custody etc.
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/24 08:24 PM
1

Smart rich men use "Married filing separately' category or lump W2 as joint household income. However even if the wife gets his W2, its still better to not disclose and let her contest and convince Judge to use higher amount. Its always better to have money judgements forced on you vs. you agreeing to pay a higher amount voluntarily
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/24 07:51 PM
1

What exactly prevents you from walking out? Fear of government looting you in divorce, fear of being alone or love/its OK feeling? You need to immediately remove fear, get the paperwork going for a legal separation, preserve your assets/money, check out the market for singles at your age etc. Once the fear is gone, you can think about counseling.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 08:08 PM
3

They should be asked to come to court if they are making allegations. Giving them zoom or virtual options just makes false cases easier
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 05:51 PM
3

I think her ex-husband has a problem, why would he give so much money to her?
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/24 07:12 PM
1

OMG!! Can't believe someone is asking this in 2024! I repeat if your state has LEGAL SEPARATION, file for it a month after marriage, get post-dated forms ready prior to marriage and get HER SIGNATURE. DO NOT MARRY if she does not SIGN. LEGAL SEPARATION is available in most large US states. After legal separation you are legally married but THERE IS NO MARITAL OR COMMUNITY PROPERTY. You can WAIVE ALIMONY on eventual divorce filing. Use LEGAL SEPARATION, DO NOT USE a prenup
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/24 04:31 PM
1

50% of what you report, if you don't report you get to keep 100%
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/24 04:27 PM
1

Whatever is reported on the W2 (or whatever you say is reported on the W2)
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/24 12:50 AM
3

It will be based on your W2.
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 05:04 PM
0

Definitely not. Divorce has no impact on financial obligations.
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 05:23 AM
0

An attorney cannot subpoena anything, he can only request. There has to be a judicial order
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 04:56 AM
1

Most likely resolution will be your evaluation + her evaluation divided by 2. Family court is not tax court and they don't have any expertise in hearing financial disputes. They are a court of equity and according to them, your wife should get money
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 06:09 PM
1

There are several non profits/ self help groups. Also plenty of resources online and now we have some AI tools. I agree, this is daunting for a first time filer, so I suggest you do the filing for first for a friend that has an uncontested divorce
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 05:53 PM
4

Most likely a waste of money. They don't know or won't tell you a single trick to save money or gain custody
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 05:38 PM
2

You file a few forms, in some counties you can do it online. Check the website of your county or superior court. IF uncontested, it can be done in 90 days. Again check online or your court website, there are plenty of self help resources
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/24 05:20 PM
1

This is excellent advice, you can simply say it was a thumb drive left in by mistake
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/24 08:29 PM
1

You need to be very careful. Any money spent as a gift is considered a valid use of marital property as long as a TMOFR (temporary order for financial restraints) is not ordered. If she drains a few million $$ from your account and gifts it to her parents, you'll have a lot of trouble contesting it during divorce. Of course, the blade cuts both ways, if you gift the $$ to your parents, its considered valid use of marital property.
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/24 08:25 PM
10

They fail to see its only a financial dispute and like everything money related you should fight to keep every cent.
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/24 05:12 PM
4

This is silly, court will not consider any of that junk marital assets. $20?! How do you plan to split that $10 each or get the lions share and keep $15?
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/24 12:23 AM
0

Alimony is involuntary only for the ignorant. If you have a certificate free marriage, there is no alimony
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/24 09:55 PM
0

I don't believe this post, there are plenty of ways to avoid giving alimony or any money if you are sufficiently wealthy. This is true in all US states
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/24 09:50 PM
4

Similar to 'death tax' or inheritance tax, spousal support is not fair and is only paid by men with limited knowledge, resources or those that cannot find obvious loopholes in the law
/r/Divorce_Men13/08/24 12:16 AM
5

Just protect yourself, separate your finances and file for pre-emptive legal separation, where you keep the $$ you earn
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/24 11:00 PM
2

Short term marriage should not involve alimony. Of course, you have to make the case by under reporting your income, over imputing her income and claiming you have been living separately for a while
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/24 03:43 AM
0

Most lawyers are all bark and no bite. Should have let her lawyer go that route and impute your income. I've seen these guys talk big in front of men but they tell her in private to settle for peanuts
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/24 01:53 AM
6

I would decrease my income potentially to zero, claim its impossible to get high paying job in the area and let your wife's lawyer try to make a case for imputing income. Getting a super low initial CS order is very important as there is no check in later years
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/24 09:28 PM
12

You need to file for CS modification claiming financial distress.
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/24 03:10 PM
1

Yes, I was advised my a lawyer in WI that you can get a legal separation with zero disclosure of assets and income if you manage a couple signatures from your wife, no need to go to court. So contact a lawyer right away and tell him your financial settlement involves each spouse keeping the assets they control
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/24 11:37 PM
4

This is true, in some states like CA you need to claim abuse if you want to force split of 50% marital wealth. Otherwise financial settlement is expected through negotiation
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/24 04:31 PM
2

Seems accurate, most countries define marital property based on title. If the marriage and divorce are in a foreign country, US courts won't take it up due to jurisdiction
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 07:30 PM
1

Also incorrect, most men are disclosing everything going by what their lawyer says and the wife's side is making up things. You keep what you hide is always true
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/24 09:26 PM
2

Real bad idea, being well connected with other men is important
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/24 05:04 PM
1

Unless you have $10M+ in marital assets a divorce lawyer is usually a waste of money. All of them will give you the same 'shoot yourself in the foot advice', disclose all your assets and give her half, disclose your income and use a calculator for alimony etc. No one will give you advice on how to save more than 50% of your assets or pay no alimony. I would go DIY
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/24 06:30 PM
2

Very good deal
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/24 03:17 AM
2

Instead of the dumb ideas in the comments, look for a lower paying job, take a sabbatical from your current one, apply for CS reduction with the lower pay and move back to your current one.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/24 08:19 PM
1

I don't know how such a clause ("no overnights with non-family members") can be enforced on a PP
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/24 08:18 PM
-4

I said 2024. Most 22 year olds have a male relative that warns them against marriage and if they are 'good engineers' they can find data online.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/24 12:00 AM
2

Well, its 2024 and if men don't know about pre-emptive legal separation, trusts, offshore accounts and crypto, they are not good engineers and should not be marrying
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/24 11:23 PM
2

Most likely a made up story given that 99% of marital wealth is earned by men
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/24 11:21 PM
1

Not sure how you guys file for taxes, but in many homes the Husband does all the filing and wife has tough time getting a copy of tax returns
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/24 04:16 PM
1

Did you disclose your income as $450K or so? If yes, get ready to pay. In general disclosures for larger pay $ should involve only the non bonus or basic pay component. Never disclose what is in W2
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 04:17 PM
1

If it goes to court, you'll have to buy her out. No, she cannot force a sale if you can come up with the money
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/24 06:15 PM
1

It means you don't have a procedural advantage and will have to negotiate with her
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/24 05:57 PM
3

Post dated separation form, no signing marriage certificate unless she signs legal separation
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/24 05:56 PM
0

Don't be a dinosaur and get a prenup, the 21'st century equivalent is called legal separation
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/24 02:46 AM
1

Whose name is on the title? Legally in MA she is the joint owner, so she can force a sale or ask you to buy her out, but you have procedural advantage if the property is in your name by saying division is out of jurisdiction of MA court
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/24 02:45 AM
8

You can check the stats from census.gov. Women make only 33cents of every marital dollar and less than 1% of the marital wealth. They receive 95% of CS and 97% of alimony. When it comes to who earns in a marriage, its become much more traditional compared to 1960's. It may come as a shock to many but more alimony as a % of husbands earnings are awarded now as compared to 1960
/r/Divorce_Men28/07/24 05:49 AM
4

The biggest lesson I've learnt is that you can keep all the money you earned during a divorce and not pay alimony. Nearly all 50 states have changed family court procedures or updated their laws to give more choices to men that don't like losing 50% or more of their wealth. The problem is that lawyers will never help you go this route, you have to do it on your own, prepare early and act quickly. It is disappointing that most men are choosing the standard, outdated procedure of approaching a law…
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 06:27 PM
3

Always remember that any well hidden asset doesn't need to be put on the spreadsheet and is yours to keep. The court is not IRS and does not have the capability to launch an investigation to uncover hidden assets. Also the Judge is not a forensic accountant who will take the time to follow a money trail and estimate the value of a hidden bank account. Most importantly, you are not a billionaire for your wife's lawyer to pursue forced disclosure or attempt to subpoena a financial institution
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/24 07:20 PM
1

Sounds like what you need is a trust with your children as beneficiaries. Your fist goal is achieved easily as the trust fund legally belongs to the trustee and you are not the beneficiary. Technically this should never come up in any future relationship you may have. Your second goal can only be achieved by some relative or friend of yours that can care for your kids
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/24 07:06 PM
1

This is not a criminal court, its actually easy to self-represent as the only thing that matters is your financial story (made up, genuine or hidden is your choice along with the documents)
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/24 03:24 PM
5

Approx. 2% of cases in my county went to trail. The best strategy to make your wife (not spouse) settle is to self represent in court and let her waste money on lawyers
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/24 02:19 PM
-1

Definitely not abduction! She is the mother and he has still not filed for divorce. The cops can track her but won't ask her to return the kids. His only option is to file for separation and request an emergency hearing for a parenting plan
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/24 11:38 PM
1

Those specialists (asset protection professionals) are available only to people with high net worth and are rarely found in an office down the street. Lets be honest with the OP, your feminist state government wants you to part with 50% of your marital property.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/24 11:35 PM
2

You have to give your state/county of residence (assuming you are in the US), there are plenty of techniques to retain all your assets and a lawyer will definitely not reveal any of that to you. In a nutshell, you need to do the research yourself and be ready to fight in court. A lawyer will advice you to give up half of what you have earned during the three years of marriage
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/24 11:32 PM
5

What are the mistakes you made? FYI when we had no fault divorce you had to prove abuse (not a simple slap but actual physical injury), adultery (with proof of living with her, not a fling) etc. Unless you did any of those things (I know you did not) the responsibility of breaking the marriage is NOT yours.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/24 11:27 PM
2

Neither of those mean anything when it comes to custody or international divorces. Each country prefers its own citizens
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/24 04:05 PM
2

You should actually be looking to gift inheritance to your children at this stage, this is not the time for thinking of dividing assets
/r/Divorce_Men19/07/24 11:23 PM
2

So close to retirement, just sell your house and other stuff, cash out retirement plans and move across the country. Let her try and file for default divorce
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/24 12:39 AM
2

Easiest way for you to check is by looking at family court cases in your county for the past year. At least in my county there is zero enforcement if you move out of state. You are completely wrong when saying that CS is enforced harshly as it varies from zero enforcement to draconian.
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/24 12:25 AM
2

Someone has scared her that she will be asked to pay you alimony as she makes more. Obviously this someone has never seen how family courts work and why 97% of the time alimony comes out of men. I would suggest take advantage of her fear and get a big payout on the assets
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/24 12:12 AM
2

Just give her what you have, not much she can do about it. Community property has a lot of disadvantages for men, but this is one advantage, i.e. you are allowed to use items as you please during your marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men15/07/24 08:33 PM
3

Not in the US, its a short term marriage. However as earlier poster said, do not sign the I-864, that would put you on the hook for paying $$ for a very long time irrespective of what happens during divorce
/r/Divorce_Men15/07/24 01:48 AM
4

The 'system' is all about money, there is nothing to be 'angry' about it, you should do something about it
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/24 10:17 PM
6

You were at a point where you could have simply cashed out retirement assets and gone your own ways, why did you have to approach the court for this?
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 05:50 PM
1

LoL like 30% of the US workforce, giving fake SSN or taking cash payment!
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 05:39 PM
9

Do the same thing to her, get two signatures from her on a joint legal separation where each spouse retains assets they control. Tell her its for a 'business you plan to start' and you will continue to be happily married. Next text from John, file the legal separation get it approved by court and continue marriage. Another text/call tell her its over
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 01:21 AM
1

Your Fragile Families and Child Wellbeing Study (FFCW), a sample of nearly 5,000 families is not representative of general population, other studies have shown 1-3% incarceration chance and only when there are other charges against the dad. There is also an important caveat that dad's have to live 'apart' i.e. no co-parenting to get jailed. However your data does prove one point: "About 70 percent of the 15 million open child support cases owe debt.". It means there are 15 million dads that simp…
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/24 07:18 PM
0

Same issue, hardly any 'non-compliance'. You provide a valid SSN to new employer and implicitly agree to garnishment
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/24 04:26 PM
–

What state/country are you in? Getting the wife's signature on the sly and filing for legal separation is the best way to neutralize her legal options. Once the court stamps those separation papers, he can keep them in a locker and confidently deal with her by denying money. Just opening your own bank account, transferring all money there and refusing to finance any wasteful spending quickly brings wives back to senses
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/24 04:49 AM
5

To be fair, most men have never tried to non-comply with the system. They listen to what their lawyer says, which is 100% compliance
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/24 02:11 AM
4

This has been talked about several times on this forum. Family court is neither criminal court nor civil court. At least in the US, the only remedy for non compliance is a perjury filing and that will not work if you have simply quit or otherwise show you can't find a job. I see you indicated imprisonment, that never happens in the US. Typically the only way to imprison a dad for non payment of CS is the mom applying for welfare benefits and a state agency determining negligence. I am not sure o…
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/24 01:23 AM
1

Filling out the forms does not mean she is going to pay. You have to make a case on why you cannot afford a lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 10:26 PM
1

Someone should test how NJ can enforce non payment of college costs by father. There is no custodial parent after 18, so the child (after 18) needs to file for non payment. However the dad has no obligation after 18. My guess is these obligations are just a scare tactic to get additional money from the dad
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 03:42 PM
2

Good luck finding a lawyer who will work pro bono for you
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 03:34 PM
1

They have to respond, its usually by mail within 30 days. As others have stated, you don't need to go to court in most cases. The tricky part is the financial disclosure. Do this only when forced and pretty much claim you have nothing
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 03:33 PM
0

You'll have to go to court and file for modification. If you are going this route you may try taking a sabbatical from work to reduce CS even further, no harm in trying
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/24 11:55 PM
10

I looked up about 6,000 family law cases from my local county, not a single one had perjury mentioned, about 50 of them went into 'forced disclosure of assets', 2 of them involved a subpoena to a bank/financial institution and none of them had any punitive charges for hiding assets. Just goes to show you how much lawyers lie and how misleading advice you find on the internet is
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/24 10:21 PM
2

This is hopefully the last generation of men that enter a marriage without securing finances and keeping what they earn. Despite all the resources out there, its incredible how many men show up willing to lose 50% of what they earn
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/24 04:23 AM
6

I would be careful to read too much into it. It talks only about parenting time and not custody, rights or child support.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 05:24 PM
3

Which state are we talking about here? You need to be careful as 50-50 can sometimes mean free childcare for 50% of the time without any parental rights
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 04:43 PM
2

There is not much you can do if the assets are outside the US. Courts here can pass an order but foreign countries usually refuse to enforce those orders. I believe you have legal separation in the Philippines, so that's your best bet
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 04:28 PM
5

If your attorney is charging by the hour (most of them do), he/she will likely ask you to give everything and shoot yourself in the foot. Divorce attorney fee is not dependent on how marital assets are split, your life on the other hand, heavily depends on it
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 03:28 AM
11

Standard practice, almost every financial disclosure is voluntary. You don't have to provide anything unless there is a forced disclosure order by the court. Every document you supply will be used against you
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 03:10 AM
6

Joint e-file, no financial disclosure, each spouse keeps assets they control. No lawyers, only court facilitators
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/24 05:31 PM
3

Overall legal system favors women and women in general are opportunists who will absolutely take advantage of events when it favors them
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/24 05:18 PM
3

You can do the same in 35 US states, soon after marriage get two signatures of hers on a legal separation form
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/24 05:12 PM
2

Legal separation when approved is binding during divorce in at least 13 states, i.e. there is no provision in family law to overturn or 'throw out' a legal separation. In other states it is technically possible to obtain spousal support despite a legal separation but any asset in Husband's name (including the marital home) is definitely off bounds. At least in my state (WA), the form for dissolution after legal separation is literally one page which clearly says the separation cannot be disputed…
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/24 11:25 PM
1

NJ allows legal separation. Your best option is to see if e-filing is available. If yes, fill in the forms yourself and check box for no spousal support needed. Get your wife to sign off when she is happy, then file yourself. Legal separation is usually approved without having to go to court, through facilitators. Once legal separation is approved, if it goes to divorce, there won't be any spousal support
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/24 10:06 PM
1

What do you want to appeal? Typically there is nothing to appeal in a divorce case. The disclosure of assets and income is voluntary and by agreeing on court jurisdiction you basically ask the court to divide your assets. On the other hand if you did not disclose anything, the court forced disclosure on you, fined you for a reason etc. you can certainly appeal. This is one reason, men should never disclose their finances to the court
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/24 05:22 PM
2

Every state has some provision for lifelong alimony. Even TX where alimony is tough to get, has provisions. Govt will never take responsibility for a disabled person when they can find another sucker to pay the bills
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/24 04:21 PM
1

Its a definite risk. If she is approved for disability benefits she can use that as proof of being unable to work and that makes a case for lifelong alimony
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/24 04:13 PM
2

Try legal separation first, if e-filing is available, do it without lawyers first
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/24 03:47 PM
3

If you voluntarily disclosed that income in a court form, you could be on the hook for legal fees depending on the state/county. Not disclosing or saying you don't file tax returns as you prepay taxes during the year is one strategy to avoid this. Court cannot order you to pay your wife for discovering your income
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/24 12:05 AM
2

Its not normal, unless you have disclosed an income far greater than hers
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/24 11:23 PM
2

If you want to keep all your money and not have to pay any alimony, try to e-file for legal separation (if available in your state/county). The good news is that three large states CA,TX and FL have made this possible. With e-filing yourself and not bringing in lawyers, you get to fill and check options to keep assets for yourself and not have to pay alimony. There is no need for any financial disclosure either, just check options to keep assets your currently control. The only trick is to be ab…
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/24 09:39 PM
3

Definite yes, some users have pointed out that e-file option is available in Texas now! So it should be a simple matter of filing out forms and negotiating with ex
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/24 03:57 PM
3

Income declared is considered for CS. Anything not declared has to be contested and almost never forced
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/24 02:05 AM
1

What did you fill out in the form? Does your state/county ask the question in one of the filings? Has she signed the filled out form? The submission to the court is what counts else there is no agreement
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 05:27 AM
2

The best way to get under a lawyer's skin is to disclose bare minimum or no information. Let them keep on mailing and going to court to extract info
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 05:12 AM
2

If you don't have a mutually agreed upon date, the separation date is the date you file for dissolution
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/24 06:03 PM
2

Family courts refuse to enforce anything other than financial and parenting clauses, There is zero prohibition to posting anything online on anybody (other than libel)
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/24 03:35 PM
2

No
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/24 12:51 AM
1

In most states location of spouses has nothing to do with separation. The date of separation is any date after marriage she agrees to and the day you file for divorce if she does not agree.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/24 12:27 AM
5

Sounds like a golden opportunity to secure your assets
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/24 12:16 AM
2

You have to make the case for underemployment. This has to be more than showing up and verbally telling the Judge she is a nurse and choosing not to work. I have been repeatedly saying in this forum that Judges go by what is in the financial declaration. If she declared zero income and you can't dispute she will be imputed at zero income
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/24 12:15 AM
6

Its good news for you, just drag the case a bit and her lawyer will ask her to settle for whatever low ball figure you quote
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/24 11:28 PM
1

It really depends on what is disclosed by the spouse. If you or STBX declares job loss and unsteady job over the past three years, usually prior year W2 is taken and if you don't disclose W2, then income is imputed at much lower level resulting in higher or lower alimony/CS payments. The discretion of the Judge comes in rejecting arguments or 'stories' not in making up W2 numbers when not disclosed
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/24 06:52 PM
9

Its very common on Reddit and Facebook. Not just vilifying men, but my posts relating to saving assets, avoiding alimony, reducing CS etc. are regularly removed from this forum and I have also been banned from many sub reddits. There is a large group of feminist, lawyer types who are determined to keep the geocentrism going
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/24 06:42 PM
1

To me it looks like you lost around $120K, this is a lot given that you can e-file and claim asset belongs to those who control it in WA state. Most men don't realize that e-filing first and fast, without lawyers and without financial disclosure puts them in a very advantageous position vs. going the lawyer route
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/24 04:17 PM
1

Duh, easiest way is for you to fill out forms and get her signature when she is an a happy mood, then e-file
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/24 12:55 AM
1

There are many ways for you to keep all your assets and not have to pay alimony but going the at-fault route is definitely not one of them
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 07:57 PM
5

Don't waste your time and money trying to prove fault. 50-50 is the worst you can do and it looks like that is your desired outcome
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 07:23 PM
-1

Not that bad, I have provided several useful tips in my prior comments. I have also outlined exact procedure in some states. No time to look at every state and argue with the lawyer types here who firmly believe real world outcomes match the law
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 03:57 PM
-2

I'll bet you don't know how illegals can vote in federal elections or how you can refuse to vaccinate your kids. As homework, first find out how those two are possible and then look for ways to avoid 50-50
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 02:48 PM
-2

To me anyone that is losing anything close to 50% of their wealth in a divorce in 2024 is either clueless about all the changes to court procedures, does not understand the law, blindly listens to his lawyer and almost certainly deserves to lose. My only tip to them is to be less emotional and more aware going forward
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 02:32 PM
0

This is also not true, the legal ownership of the asset plays a big part in the split. For example, you can receive money from a trust for daily expenses that become CP, but any growth of trust funds not in your name is not CP. This is also true for any gift $$ received from a trust and deposited into a joint account. Merely depositing into joint account does not comingle, the account has to be used for marital expenses
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 08:22 PM
2

Make it clear that it will be a long and expensive process if it goes to court. There are several complicating factors like Casino revenue and Native property rights. Neither of you want to spend years, spending huge $$ on legal fees, when all she has to do is sign off the 401K
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 08:17 PM
-1

No, that is not true
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 08:15 PM
0

Get a post dated legal separation instead of a prenup. Basically ask her to sign it along with marriage certificate. File for legal separation a month or so after marriage. Continue to live happily married. When its time to divorce there is no asset split or alimony. However as others have mentioned CS is a problem which you will need to deal with in case you have children.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 03:57 PM
2

BTW, this here is great news for the men of Texas, you don't need to disclose financial info in case of uncontested divorce! Kudos to all who made this happen in a large state like Texas "CHANGE IN LAW! All family law cases filed after September 1, 2023, no longer need to exchange the previously mandatory Required Initial Disclosures. If your case was filed before September 1, 2023, after a party to a family law case (like a divorce) files an answer, both sides are obligated to exchange certain …
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 04:26 AM
2

That'll probably be the cheapest and easiest option, where you do not need to go to court
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 01:31 AM
4

You understand you should negotiate with her first and see if she is ready to sign off your 401k.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 01:12 AM
2

For southern states, you can't do it online. Still simple, go to this website, download and print forms and follow instructions https://texaslawhelp.org/guide/i-need-a-divorce-we-have-children-under-18
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/24 09:25 PM
0

You don't have to do anything this drastic to avoid or reduce CS. As a first step just document and keep track of how frequently ex is violating 50/50 parenting time. Once you have enough to make a case against her, directly approach her and negotiate lower CS payment. If she does not agree, take a break from work, claim zero income, go for CS modification along with your custody violations. You can ignore scare tactics from lawyer types on these forums. The chance of government action against y…
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/24 07:25 PM
8

Why are you wasting time here? File immediately for legal separation irrespective of your feelings. Its a 6 month marriage, so you should be able to claim zero marital assets. Whatever happens, remember to get the government out of marriage
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/24 11:42 PM
13

Whatever happens eventually you need to legally separate and then think about living with her. There is too much risk in hitting the 10 year mark above 50 with two children
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/24 04:07 AM
4

Giving money upfront is perceived as a sign of weakness by Lawyers, some of these guys are greedy and all your CS support will go the lawyers. On the other hand if you make your wife spend HER money on her lawyer fees, her lawyer will be concerned about not getting paid and ask her to settle
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 08:42 PM
6

You are giving way too much. Ideally you should start at zero and make her and her lawyers sweat on the disclosure
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 08:36 PM
2

Why are you paying anything? One of the best ways to divorce a SAHM is to cut off access to all money, drag the case out for a couple years, make her spend all her money on legal fees, force her to file emergency motion to cover legal expenses and then offer a low ball settlement. Her lawyer most likely in interest of getting paid ask her to settle.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 08:34 PM
3

Its only three years, take the assets you control and file jointly. Don't waste money on lawyers unless you make more than $1M per year. Also do not waste time thinking about community vs non community property states. There is zero difference in your case
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/24 05:00 AM
0

Likely post is fake. Never seen this in 100's of filings
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/24 11:24 PM
1

Joint file online and DIY
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/24 02:13 AM
6

$300 on the filing, 98-2 asset split, $0 alimony
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/24 01:56 AM
3

Best bet for you is to file a police complaint on missing person. You should also stop CS payments if any and raise petition for CS modification
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 11:33 PM
2

This is very bad advice, most likely from a lawyer who is interested in quick bucks. As others have mentioned, there are many grey areas on what to disclose as marital property. The word of the law will of course state any potential wealth gain during marriage as marital property. In reality, you should never disclose any RSU's, conditional earnings like bonuses and even vested shares as you can lose them in case of misconduct with employer
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 04:54 PM
3

Concealing assets just by omission or if you believe they are not pertinent to your divorce or if you believe they asset may not be yours is NOT perjury. The term perjury is highly misunderstood in divorce cases. After marriage both spouses have full control of marital assets by law but in reality the control only exists with the spouse whose name the asset is under. The golden rule of divorce is that the person concealing an asset will most likely keep it. There are various options for forced d…
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 04:32 PM
1

As with every negotiation, you file first, disclose only wish list, wait for dispute and resolve
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 04:10 PM
3

I think you are confused, its not keeping the house but getting a good chunk of equity. Let's say she keeps the house but you get 90% equity then it is a good deal
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/24 07:30 PM
1

Sounds like you want a separate agreement with her. This can be done outside of the divorce process. However it looks like you are trying to achieve something else here with your stepson. Just remember that your main goal in a divorce is to keep most of the money to yourself. Custody agreements or parenting plans can always be challenged
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/24 05:01 AM
2

What does the decree state? Are we talking about assets, alimony or CS? If both of you move your assets out of the state then its tough to enforce, likewise for alimony. CS may be possible to enforce if you petition in CA or she petitions in FL
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/24 02:36 AM
1

She will likely get half of what you disclose. What you want to disclose is up to you and your lawyer cannot help. She can ask for anything but you don't have to provide it. The basic process is that anything not disputed is accepted, i.e. if you say you are bankrupt and she accepts, then court will agree
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 05:21 PM
1

For CA you have the option to do it yourself, two forms to fill out with option to keep assets you currently control. You don't need to do anything else for uncontested, its a waste of time
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 05:18 PM
1

Judge can't change it, only refuse to sign it. Neither in Nevada nor in CA do you need to disclose assets in case of uncontested
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 05:16 PM
3

No, you are spot on, for men their wealth and job/business are very important. That is why it surprises me when men disclose all their assets in a divorce and are ready to forgo 50% without question
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 05:01 PM
1

Its not a correct assumption, most lawyers advise clients not to contest and negotiate a settlement. Some others show up unprepared to contest, many others don't bother to show up and send a written statement
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 06:35 PM
1

What lawyers tell you will happen usually does not happen in family court. I've looked at 1000's of cases from 2022-23 for CS modification, majority involve simply reviewing the form by the Judge and stamping the order. What you say happens ONLY when you ask for imputation or object to her taking the zero income, its not AUTOMATIC. Family courts work on disputes and simply stamp anything that is not disputed
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 06:07 PM
1

That is true, if the form is not filled out correctly, court will strike down and ask her to come back
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 05:42 PM
1

Imputation is not automatic, you have to make a case for it. She is making a strong case for zero income by saying she does not have a job
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 05:39 PM
1

PTA (Parental Time Adjustment) is not the default in several states
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 05:38 PM
1

Its not an easy answer and will depend on the state and what the separation decree states. In both CA and WA there is zero expectation for legally separate couples to live physically separate (State governments have told this is due to high home prices). My understanding was that if the couple live in the same house and are OK with sharing finances, you can file jointly. However Turbo tax automatically pushes you into married filing separately once you select legally separated. So you may need t…
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 03:50 AM
-3

Your lawyer is wrong on one aspect. She can absolutely claim zero income and ask for more CS. Your lawyer is correct in that finding another lawyer that agrees to mis-representing income is rare. He is also correct that you can ask for 50-50 custody. However get ready to pay $2100 unless you are ready to fight the revision of her income
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 03:32 AM
2

Smart advice, but there is a lot more he can do
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 02:02 AM
1

Check my prior comments, you need to study court procedures, forms, know about forced vs voluntary disclosure etc. Lawyers will not help you.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 12:05 AM
0

You would have provided her your paystub and during filing most court forms say you are agreeing to Jurisdiction of the court. There are many ways to contest, delay and pay nothing. You are not doing any of that by choosing the standard procedure
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 10:47 PM
0

Fair or not, you are agreeing to it by providing your salary information and then complying with what your wife's lawyer is saying. Once you agree to something, it becomes fair
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 09:19 PM
1

The only benefits to marriage for men is to sponsor a visa for their wife and/or get SS if the wife does not work. Other than those two there are ZERO benefits and a LOT of risk.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 05:14 PM
3

Men should read this. Buying a home is not a great investment in many cases and is always considered marital property during divorce
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 05:05 PM
2

Noticed you are in CA and in San Diego, that means you are in luck (county not mentioned but assuming e-file for family court cases is an option for you). There are two steps needed to create an almost unbreakable financial wall prior to marriage 1) As your state allows legal separation, fill out forms for joint legal separation along with fiance (when you are ready to get married) and sign it post dated (i.e. put a date a month or so after planned marriage) 2) In the forms list out your assets …
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 10:33 PM
1

This is not true, her obligations are increasing. The new Husband pay is not included in the calculation but a portion of her income is subtracted
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 08:02 PM
2

Some court forms need that info in the confidential section
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 02:47 PM
1

I would focus on figuring out how to get her signature, how to scan paper to create a pdf and how to e-file a joint dissolution court case. Getting her signature the roadblock not your relationship or what she will give up
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 02:42 PM
1

Given that its WA state all you need is her signature on two forms for joint filing and keeping assets you currently control. File online, no alimony and no asset split, no court appearance, no lawyer. She has one year to dispute. Also WA state offers legal separation, again its just a variation of the forms, all you need is for her to sign two pieces of paper. You asked if a post-nup could prevent alimony, not at this stage. Its a long term marriage, so post-nup will likely be rejected
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 02:37 PM
1

OMG, that boat sailed a long time ago. It's not a 'partnership' by law as you are expected to act in best interest of marriage financially, provide for her etc. Nothing has changed legally other than no fault divorce, things are exactly where they were 200 years ago
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 02:24 PM
1

So how do you punish your wife if she insults you? Take it like a man or get into shouting match with her?
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 02:14 PM
1

If she is ready to spend $200K to get $100K from you, then yes, we can't help, but we could have certainly postponed
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 02:12 PM
2

There is really nothing you can do as beating a child is perfectly legal for parents in all 50 states. Your best option is to ask for more parenting time
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 02:19 AM
-11

You seem like a simp. You should be ordering her to make a drink and have the gumption to punish her if she insults you.
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 02:12 AM
1

Looks like your wife is really dumb, if you had come here earlier, we could have advised you on several tricks to postpone and inflate her legal bills, forcing her to settle for pennies on the dollar
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 02:09 AM
1

Yes, that is the procedure, its called forced disclosure in my county. The court will not simply pass that order, you have to make a case telling why you believe the opposite party is employed by a certain company and show them proof (ex. pay stubs). Your wife's lawyer cannot contact your employer and ask them for a pay stub, they will have to procure it by some other means. Secondly you'll be given a chance to defend against the forced disclosure, for example you can simply show them employment…
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 02:05 AM
11

I would advise caution while spending money, many female profiles on these sites are AI bots designed to interact with men and make them spend money. Same old trick but new technology
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/24 08:39 PM
1

There are no such 'mens advocates' and the deck is definitely stacked against men, don't listen to some idiots who tell you Judges just follow some gender neutral guidelines. Most states have some eyewash laws that say you get 50% custody, in reality this means you pay her and look after her kids for 50% of the time. Any major decision, school, name, religion, medication, the mom gets the rights, the dad will end up paying
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/24 12:41 AM
2

Will be ~$1500/month in CS. Usual trick of taking a sabbatical from work and reporting zero income might reduce to $1K/month. Alimony is usually negotiated
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/24 10:58 PM
9

Congrats!! You are in a really good spot. After retirement and no kids to support, you can pretty much take your money and live wherever you want to. Let her do the hard work of filing for a default divorce and attempting to collect. You just stay in touch with your daughters, they are old enough to understand
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/24 10:32 PM
1

I don't see many options here, looks like you agreed to a schedule and she went along with it. The only other thing the court cares about is money. She can do anything short of provable physical abuse to the kids and there is nothing you can do about it
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/24 11:50 PM
1

Its never a good idea to have these informal arrangements. Even if you pay $0 as CS, you should always have some documentation, at least a written agreement that she is OK with the arrangement. To answer your question, there should not be a problem with your second wife as uncontested divorces are basically stamped without question
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/24 06:58 PM
-2

That was most likely a fake post, but this does happen in reality. The good news for men close to retirement is that simple 401K cash out, offshore fixed income investments and no property makes it impossible for the wife to get any marital property
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/24 06:40 PM
1

Navigating court procedure is their primary purpose
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/24 10:15 PM
1

How are they able to garnish without court order? They can request whatever they want but its not enforceable unless you agree to it or a Judge rules otherwise
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/24 09:44 PM
2

Be clear on what you want out of your attorney. Most are useful only to fill forms and give you canned advice. No one will tell you the real procedural tricks to save your assets
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/24 09:41 PM
1

Are you confident enough to self represent in court? Easiest way for men is to self-represent, drag the case out, get wife to spend $100K+ in legal fees and force them to settle due to lack of money
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/24 11:12 PM
2

Don't change PP unless she offers more parenting time
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/24 09:40 PM
1

Why did you list these stocks as community property?
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/24 01:08 AM
2

You should change your attitude. Family courts are rabidly anti male and will exhaust you not just financially but also emotionally if given a chance. Even if you now believe you are 100% at fault, you should fight for the best deal possible, use every trick in the book to save your assets and income and not let STBX use kids as a bargaining chip.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/24 04:53 PM
1

Actually no, if you close a bank account and do not disclose the cash, that is not contempt. You are simply saying you don't have money. The big mistake this guy did, he put everything in a joint account and shared all that info. He should have closed everything and said there was no money. He tries to argue in vain that money in the bank is a loan and the Judge doesn't care. If its really a loan that guy is screwed, that is why I keep telling men not to disclose things As for W2, that is anothe…
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 09:37 PM
3

Any settlement approved by default is not executable for assets not in your control and outside court jurisdiction. She can easily take the money and open an account in local bank in another state and your default judgement is useless
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 06:53 PM
1

Silly advice, doesn't talk one sentence about voluntary disclosure
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 05:36 PM
2

You have been married for a year and a half. Neither of you will owe anything to each other, its too short a duration to make a valid argument for a money judgement
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 05:30 PM
7

Keep track of efforts you are making to serve her. It may be helpful if you need to file for default divorce after three attempts.
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 05:26 PM
2

You are allowed to use money for a normal life. A temporary order for financial restraint is not a freeze on a bank account
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 01:44 AM
5

There are many options available, unfortunately the lawyers get more $$ by favoring women and they don't tell you any tricks to save $$. What they suggest to men comes straight out of a Google search and is the worst possible advice
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 01:08 AM
5

Are you close to retirement? You should have asked this forum prior to divorce for tips, there are plenty of options if you are close to retirement
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 12:36 AM
1

So, no verification?
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 09:54 PM
5

Can you read what I have written? You are talking about a home which has already been disclosed and you are trying to dispute a higher value claimed by your wife. That is the situation I am telling men to AVOID! You NEVER disclose first and haggle, you LEAVE the discovery to the other party
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 09:51 PM
1

Complete opposite, I took the 'no disclosure' option and never revealed any assets. Seeing lots of guys do this (including Bezos) but they never help out other men and are happy to let lawyers and court system loot men
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 09:37 PM
1

This is de-jure correct but de-facto incorrect. The reason is that all states start with a form which involves 'no disclosure' or 'voluntary disclosure' of assets. With 'no-disclosure' the presumption is that asset under control of husband belongs to him and anything under the wife belongs to her. Under 'voluntary disclosure' each party is 'voluntarily' listing their assets as separate or community property. There is no court order which asks them to do so. There are several stages of dispute be…
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 08:52 PM
1

For rich folks, who usually divorce for strategic and tax avoidance reasons (ex. Jeff Bezos), it makes plenty of sense to retain Husband's last name. For starters, they are still husband and wife, just not legally, their names are on a host of financial agreements and documents (off shore trusts etc.), for privacy they can just use Ms. Bezos (Is that the current or ex.?) etc.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 08:31 PM
1

This is wrong info, divorce is a negotiated settlement and the legal standard of 50:50 is only applicable in case of dispute
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 08:23 PM
1

They can't ask the bank for confidential info, they are a private company and have to rely on public reports like credit scores and Chex System. Those reports don't give account info or transaction identifiers. Also the court does not appoint a forensic accountant, its basically paid info from a private company and is not even considered in criminal fraud cases
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 08:21 PM
6

If you have disclosed all your assets you have shot yourself in the foot and are on track to lose 50% or more. The best results are obtained when wife's side has to force disclosure and spend money on forensic accountants to track assets. This has been the repeated experience in 1000's of successful cases
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 04:56 PM
0

Do they check the veracity of pay stubs provided? Curios to see how they verify finances in California
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 04:42 PM
1

Which state and county? I've looked at data and procedures from several counties, there is no court order mandating you to fill out any form or to submit any pay stub. There has not been a single instance in 2023 in my county where the court asked an employer to disclose how much they pay an employee. How are they going to find out where you work?
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 04:39 PM
1

Why? Which state is this? Do they ask your employer to come to court and disclose your income?
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 04:32 AM
-4

Just put that $39K + interest in another account and don't disclose it. For those small amounts, its expensive to forced disclosure route. For retirement savings just ask your lawyer to give her $125K and ask her for $125K
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 04:30 AM
1

Record everything and contact child protective services, complain and document several times prior to contacting a lawyer for divorce. It takes a lot to get custody of a child
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 02:05 AM
0

You can say you don't have the money due to business issues. Most of the 'attorney letters' are just threats
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 02:01 AM
-4

How did they find out your Gross income?
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 01:57 AM
7

The risks of vasectomy are greatly exaggerated by same section of 'marriage worshipers' and 'women simps' that keep saying marriage (the certificate kind) is great for men and brings a lot of happiness
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/24 02:16 PM
1

For short duration marriages, easiest is to disclose zero community property, i.e. you saved nothing after marriage and all that you have was earned prior to marriage. Hopefully you have not purchased a house as the primary residence (if owned is always treated as community property)
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/24 11:08 PM
4

Yes, that works, now that we have crypto. You first open a crypto account in Cayman then wire money to a Coinbase account from your bank and purchase any crypto currency. Then transfer the crypto to the Cayman Islands crypto account, convert back to USD and transfer to Cayman bank. I have done the calculations, its simply not profitable to pay forensic accountants and go through forced disclosure with this scheme. Despite community property laws in every state which say 'hiding assets in divorce…
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/24 11:04 PM
2

Once you legally separate there is no 'marital or community property', everything earned after legal separation is treated as separate property. If you legally separate a day after marriage, you can continue living as a married couple for lets say 20 years. When you file for divorce, anything earned during the 20 years is yours to keep, also there is no chance of alimony
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/24 09:56 PM
5

Good update which shows the consequences of vindictive behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/24 07:40 PM
3

Which county, state and country are we talking about? Have you disclosed your assets and signed off on the disclosure form during filing? If yes, the judgement will be legally binding on you (at least the asset split part), alimony and CS are treated separately. You certainly have a hack and that involves not signing on asset disclosure or simply not cooperating
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/24 04:05 AM
1

LoL!
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/24 10:16 PM
2

Probably fake, but there are counties in the US where you can do the entire divorce online and without the court notifying your wife. The caveat is that you should get her signature on two forms and say you are filing jointly
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/24 10:15 PM
1

Legal separation > Prenup
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/24 07:55 PM
3

Its already available in 30+ states, its called legal separation. It costs $300 and is absolutely foolproof if handled probably. Reduces wealth loss due to asset split and alimony to 0. Does not address CS though
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/24 07:54 PM
2

See my other comment, your order is based on % of a variable income, its almost impossible to argue for equalization. How are they verifying your variable income?
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/24 08:05 PM
1

Your support order is not good, it should be based on a fixed component, not as % of variable income. Negotiate with her first and ask the court to modify
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/24 07:06 PM
2

If its outside Jurisdiction, court can technically give a credit for that asset to the other spouse. However its a big ask to go to another country and prove that asset belongs to you and it was through marital funds. The $10K transfer limit makes it tough to track as banks don't need to report transfers below $10K
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/24 06:25 PM
2

You should be doing $10K or less every day (or every few days) transfer, till the account is empty. As mentioned in prior posts, any asset outside the country should not be disclosed and let your wife try to discover
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/24 05:33 PM
1

Here are my suggestions based on looking at cases in my county. Any gifts, loans, educational, healthcare expenses etc. to relatives are legitimate expenses and come under 'regular course of business' clause in the financial restraint order. Technically your wife can deplete marital assets to zero and the Judge will not care about it. This is your base case or what you can expect if you don't contest. 1) The discovery process (in my county) is handled as voluntary sharing of information between …
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/24 05:04 PM
1

This is an excellent answer and aligns with some of the strategies I suggest. Both forced disclosure of assets and trial are expensive and outcomes are uncertain. For example if you have $1M and decide to hide it, your wife can risk forcing discovery and asking for trial with $100K legal fees and potential upside of $500K or net $400K for her. If she fails, she loses $100K. So midpoint of outcome is $150K. Hence a rational choice for the wife is to accept $200K if offered
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/24 09:55 PM
3

This is probably the only forum on reddit you can express that view. I believe X is little better now
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/24 12:20 AM
2

Its difficult to talk about consequences without knowing your state, county and local court procedures. The general rule is that asset not disclosed and in Jurisdiction can be taken to forced disclosure (its still less than 1% of cases), asset out of Jurisdiction and not disclosed is almost impossible to split. I would not worry about other party doing wire traces, its a common lawyer tactic to scare you into disclosing, just say that account is not yours and you are welcome to force disclosure.…
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/24 04:29 PM
3

THE LIST is now almost 20 years old, too many laws and court procedures have changed, but its still a good starting guide
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/24 04:57 AM
3

Too much to say in one post as it depends on income, assets and which county you are filing, some generic ideas include 1) Checking option to keep assets you control and filing for legal separation without lawyers (without disclosing any financials) 2) Disclosing limited info during discovery and waiting for wife to go forced disclosure route, increase her expenses and force her to negotiate when she runs out of money 3) Making withdrawals prior to order for financial restraint, gifts to parents…
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/24 03:44 AM
0

Why are you wasting money on a lawyer with $57 in the checking account?
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/24 08:20 PM
0

Why is it a mistake? I think you are quite lucky as you may get to keep all the assets you have earned. Its very rare to involve third parties in divorce financial disputes. You can just transfer your money into your parents account and tell your ex during discovery, it was to settle prior obligations.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/24 08:16 PM
1

That's messed up, in most US counties its messed up the other way i.e. Father usually pays irrespective of parental time as mother is considered parent with primary custody
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/24 08:05 PM
-1

Its not going to change the father's CS obligation
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/24 06:24 PM
7

Old Macaroon is correct, the rules are well know and understood and there are plenty of options to prevent 50-50 asset split. Ideally you should start some steps prior to marriage, but even during divorce there is shocking lack of awareness on how to fight 50-50 default presumption. Men go by what their lawyer advises, who will not tell them much
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/24 03:52 PM
1

Its based on what you disclose as your income, it is neither past, nor present nor future
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/24 10:58 PM
3

Why not use her fear to your advantage, get paperwork for legal separation first, each keeping assets you control and no alimony. Tell her couple signatures and no courts (Where no one wears a mask) and no lawyers. Get legal separation then continue living in the same house and file for divorce if things get worse
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/24 01:48 AM
7

Used to be lot better here, we would discuss legal and financial options freely. Folks have moved on moderators have changed, but its still way better than r/Divorce
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/24 01:45 AM
1

Its not legal, the OP has voluntarily agreed to it and made is legal
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/24 11:29 PM
2

How do you know your outcome without going to court?
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/24 11:28 PM
1

Not, true CS is based on income or your job. You have to petition for a lower amount but its going to be modified if you don't have an income
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/24 11:27 PM
1

Seems to be a simple divorce, why not do it yourself?
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/24 11:25 PM
1

How is she doing this from another state? Simply don't respond to the Alimony notice
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/24 05:50 PM
1

Only way I can think of is to give you 100% custody on paper (this will reduce your obligation). If she wants to get the house make sure you show some insanely high Zillow price and give discount off that
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/24 05:35 PM
3

What do you mean you just found out? You must have disclosed income and assets voluntarily upon your lawyers advice
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/24 05:01 PM
3

You should be upset because you listened to what your lawyer told you and simply did not look into cases where rich men get divorced. You should be upset because you don't understand simple concepts like 'voluntary disclosure' and 'forced disclosure from court' and why its always advantageous to get 'forced disclosure' for men. Most importantly you failed to realize the injustice meted out against you and have done nothing to fight it
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/24 02:59 PM
-2

I believe you should be upset with yourself for disclosing everything during divorce and agreeing to pay her long term alimony and CS without a fight. Lets not blame the 'laws', every state has laws that give wide latitude for voluntary disclosure and good protection against getting looted, however most men listen to what their lawyer says and agree to get looted. Think its too late, but you can try taking a sabbatical from work, asking for reduction in Alimony + CS as you have no income, stop p…
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/24 01:46 AM
13

Just think what will happen if her ex stops CS and alimony payments and runs off to another state or country. You will be on the hook to support her while she battles in court
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/24 01:27 AM
1

This is such a general question, no mention of country or state (if in the US). The only advice I can give is that in family court, no one cares if the marriage was arranged or not. In the US the best protection is to have the marriage ceremony and not sign the certificate, that way you can say you are married but you are legally single.
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/24 03:26 AM
7

Going to a birthday party is good for few. Many men go into a shell and don't interact with anyone after divorce
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/24 04:43 PM
7

Keep the evidence but do not report. Why bother as long as she you don't have to pay her anything
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 12:24 AM
1

Scratching my head here, why not just wait for the final decree, take a home equity loan and pocket the money, empty the joint account and stop the mortgage and alimony payments. She will be too broke to do anything
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 12:19 AM
1

Sounds like she won't be able to keep the house, why don't you use that to your advantage to reduce or eliminate alimony and lower your CS payments?
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/24 02:56 PM
1

Family court judges order a lot of things from parenting schedules, no contact orders to support payments. However I only look at contempt proceedings. At least in my county I don't find anything related to the small gap between when they turn 18 and till they graduate (or fail)
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/24 02:38 PM
3

If available in your state first file for legal separation without any lawyers. Get the financial agreement in writing and file in court. Once you do that you can discuss divorce coolly
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/24 12:34 AM
1

It would depend on why he/she is in HS after 18, typically failing or taking a break stops CS at 18, but if he/she turned 18 in the middle, the arrangement is expected to continue until graduation.
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/24 12:25 AM
-1

It does not matter, in all 50 states, if your child is above 18 you are not legally obligated to pay. Of course court procedures in some states may be presented in such way that paying for college seems mandatory, once you sign on it, it becomes binding. However if you don't sign the Judge cannot force you to pay
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/24 09:28 PM
2

There is no CS above 18, in many states, children above 18 are not party to the divorce and should not be listed in the filing
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/24 06:45 PM
8

If any of these serious allegations are true you are out of your mind to hand over half your money to her. Get a loan on the mortgage, clean the bank accounts and stash the cash before she files for divorce and a financial restraining order is passed. There are plenty of tricks you can use, the easiest one being letting her run out of money for legal fees and then asking her to settle for peanuts
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/24 06:42 PM
5

Once you sign its over. I have been repeatedly pointing this, all financial declarations are voluntary, if you don't point out a mistake and sign, you can't go back and ask for more saying she cheated you
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/24 06:33 PM
2

somewhat an overkill, at least in my county, the Judge does not go through financial statements and ask what you did with every withdrawal. They expect you to show up with an agreement in place else they simply split what remains in the account and sign
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/24 04:46 PM
11

File first, file for everything and tell her you'll pay nothing. Let her waste money on lawyers fees for a few months and she will be ready to negotiate for a smaller amount
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/24 04:41 PM
4

Defeatist attitude, you can just put cash under your mattress and see if she can force you to give half of it
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/24 02:33 AM
1

I don't understand how the lawyer can force you to disclose something without a court order explicitly saying so. That is what i have been advising men, ask your wife's lawyer to go get the order from the court
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/24 02:31 AM
1

How do they get that statement without you disclosing? RSU's are usually handled by Wall Street institution like Morgan Stanley directly with your employer
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/24 12:23 AM
2

That's a lot of money, you can figure out RSU split in 5 minutes. Say you don't have RSU's and see if she can find out.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/24 12:24 AM
2

Not able to understand why you are worrying about her finances. IF she makes a crappy deal and gets hosed on the asset split, then take the money and enjoy your life. Either way, don't go to court if you are getting a good deal
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/24 07:39 PM
3

Given that most of the equity in that house is yours you can probably claim it separate. Another idea for you, why not take a home equity loan and pay off your father? Seems like an easy way to convert marital home value appreciation to separate property
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/24 03:09 PM
1

You have to say the primary residence was different or there was no primary residence, all depends on how you fill out the forms and communicate
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/24 03:01 PM
3

No, he is correct, if you go strictly by procedure she will get 50%
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/24 04:45 AM
0

It all depends on how you handle the filing, the negotiation, the county, the Judge and your ability to understand the court process and find the loopholes. If you go by what your lawyer says, you'll lose more than 50% given that primary residence is always considered marital property
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/24 04:45 AM
1

Not in my state. Law specifically prevents the court ordered fishing for assets you are describing. This is done with the intent to prevent privacy breach and not involve third parties. For ex. you gave money to a friend, your wife alleges the friend will pay you back after divorce, will the court call the friend? The answer is no in my state. The court will simply take what's in the bank and divide by 2. I do crypto and finance tech for a living, This has been the biggest discovery of my life. …
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/24 01:53 AM
1

Definitely works, I've been researching on this topic for two years and looked at thousands of cases from my local county court. Advised several men. The key is how long it takes to get a forced disclosure order from the court and what documents one needs to produce to get that order. In my county there is a one year wait time and you need exact account name, number and address. Forensic accountants use the Chex system where account numbers as hidden with xxx, like 5xx5xxx6. Courts refuse to giv…
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/24 12:46 AM
0

No, check my other comments, You have to file a motion to force disclosure and Judge will not rule on forensic accountant finding (its a private party). In all states the declaration is de-facto voluntary (very similar to how illegal aliens can vote in elections), i.e. you need to swear you are telling the truth but there is no check
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/24 12:16 AM
0

Equitable division also means 50:50 is the default. De-facto there is no difference between community property and equitable states when it comes to asset split. However this assumes you are voluntarily disclosing your assets and agree to 50:50. You can always fight for more and there are several ways to do it
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/24 09:38 PM
1

To answer your question on long term separation, once again I believe you can claim you were effectively separated the day you moved out. However this would mean you would need to disclose the value of the property five years ago and its current value. This gives the wife's lawyer ammo to ask for more
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/24 09:36 PM
1

I thought FL was one of the states where you can file with option to keep assets you currently control. If I remember she needs to sign once and the Judge stamps. This agreement then follows through the process. If you have been the sole provider, I would strongly urge you to go for entire equity, let her fight to get the 50%
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/24 09:33 PM
1

My man, you have done the absolutely right thing! Filing first and with surprise gives you several advantages. What did you fill out in the form for financial disclosures? If you have not done it, take the time to think through and disclose only assets she knows about.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 05:08 PM
4

This is the best advice a family practice lawyer can give. You should always ask for 100-0, no alimony, not disclose assets unless asked for, full custody etc. Its the basics of bargaining and most men shoot themselves by starting at 50-50
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 05:00 PM
1

By not losing anything in the first place!!
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/24 09:16 PM
1

Don't go by calculators, would advise taking a sabbatical from work, contact a lawyer and say you have zero income and zero assets, let your wife's lawyer try and get more from you
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/24 04:37 AM
4

Trying to prove you own a well hidden asset, real or imaginary is very difficult. Tell him they are welcome to go to court and force disclosure
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/24 11:19 PM
2

Depends on the state but legal separation can give you all the assets you earned. This is because of 1) There is typically no waiting period for legal separation and the form is very simple with a check box saying 'each spouse agrees to keep assets they currently control'. If you can get your wife to sign one of these, its a simple e-file 2) Some counties have option to use court facilitators to file final legal separation and get it stamped by Judge, therefore court visit's are not required It'…
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/24 10:50 PM
4

spot on, the discovery process is a waste of time. Forensic accountants don't have ability to look under your mattress and family courts do not have authority to order search and seizure
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/24 02:44 PM
0

De-Jure, you have to split assets 50:50 there is no way around it. De-facto, giving up assets you control is completely voluntary. Its shocking, how blatantly lawyers lie and say you have to disclose everything, while the other party discloses nothing and gets away with it. Filing first absolutely gives you chance to fill out your disclosures as you please and see if she challenges it. The process is somewhat like foreign citizens voting in US elections. You will a form saying you are a US citiz…
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/24 03:38 AM
2

Get preemptive legal separation, keep all assets in your control
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/24 03:01 AM
1

Legally you don't have much leverage here. A divorce decree is usually an agreed upon contract signed off by the Judge. So you can't simply refuse to sign it. Whose name is on the title of the house? Yours, hers or both? If your name is on the title, I think you can just drag your foot when it comes to selling the house. No refusal, just keep delaying till she pays college costs. Also, your son is no longer a minor, so its a bit unfair to ask either of you to pay
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/24 02:37 AM
7

I usually never listen to a lawyer, because 'well, he's a lawyer!!' Tell me which scenario is better for the lawyer Husband earns the lions share in the marriage, invests and creates all the wealth. Wife earns less, spends a lot. They have two children Husband gets 95% of marital assets, no alimony and full custody of both children. Wife gets 5% of assets but does not have to pay CS. Husband is very happy and never wants to see the lawyer again. Wife is unhappy but cannot afford the lawyer Husba…
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/24 01:27 AM
2

What are your rules on income verification for child support within your county? Is income for child support self reported (i.e. you are asked to provide copy of pay stubs) (this is majority of the country over 95%), are employers ordered to give information (less than 2%) or imputed income (1% or less). If its self reported, you can take sabbatical and say lower income, petition for reduction and go back to high paying job again. For income imputation cases, you have to demonstrate typical wage…
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/24 04:02 PM
2

IMO, the lawyer is there to dispense legal advice, not to get you the best deal. I am the only one trying to get you the best deal!!
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/24 02:02 AM
1

Duh, of course you should go for zero spousal support! Why are you using online calculators or reading lawyers websites to figure out how much you'll pay. You do understand that ALL financials in a divorce are negotiable, all financial disclosures are de-facto voluntary and there is no divorce IRS to check your financial documents? Not sure which California county you are in, but Santa Clara has the most corrupt, lazy and inefficient family courts in the country. I've advised a few folks on this…
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 11:57 PM
2

I think your smart financial planning is irritating her. You should ask for spousal support just as a bargaining chip
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 11:35 PM
2

100% correct, TRO filing will force her to move out if they are not married and she lives in his house. Also the simple act of not putting the fathers name on the birth certificate makes it very difficult for unmarried women to collect CS. Simple procedures work in men's favor even when the law is against them!
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 05:48 PM
1

Awesome news for you, by simply not signing the certificate you can legally keep most of your money. What do the kids birth certificates say, do they list you as the father? If not, she has to go the paternity route to collect CS which is not easy. What is fair is to make sure you have enough money to live your life as you see fit. Anything she needs for herself, she should go out and earn it herself. You are not legally obligated to give her anything and the morally obligation to provide went o…
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 05:44 PM
1

This was discussed earlier, you have three options and all three are losers 1) QDRO split, you lose 50% immediately and then approx 10% when you retire and withdraw 2) You keep pension and pay alimony; after tax payments are approx. 60% loss similar to option 1 3) You cash out pension and don't declare as asset. Loss is 40% with the penalty tax and loss of further tax free growth. This is the cheapest option for you as loss is below 50%
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 05:36 PM
-1

Make sure you get the boys on your side by showing how much money you are losing. Also get the best financial deal possible. Its very difficult to recover financially if you lose 50% of your wealth, don't give her more than 5% of what you have made
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/24 05:50 PM
5

Yes, this was one of the few forums allowing men to tell the truth, but we have new moderators and new members joining, lets see how long it lasts
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/24 10:34 PM
2

Wouldn't call it a win till a judgement is ordered and carried out, but yes its an inconvenience you have inflicted on her
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/24 09:27 PM
2

Go to France
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/24 09:06 PM
6

There is a third big option you are missing. 3) Its the divorce laws that are a scam and men should have flexibility to negotiate binding custody and financial agreements at time of marriage, i.e. there should be looting prevention laws
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/24 05:12 PM
1

Then we are talking about two different things, you should mention clearly in your post "LLC argument for hiding income" but you used "money" (Assets) which can also be hidden using an LLC
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 06:10 PM
0

You are mixing asset split with CS. Either way I don't believe you. I looked at 1000's of cases in the last 2 years from my county court. There have only been handful cases where assets were forcibly seized and even in those cases, it was for previously agreed CS not being paid. Its complete nonsense to say that not cooperating with every demand for info from your wife's lawyer will lead to the Judge making up some number and forcing you to pay it. If the system is really that unfair in your sta…
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 05:35 PM
8

I can see why the rich may want to marry again, its primarily a tax benefit as well as wealth transfer mechanism
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/24 05:36 PM
4

I think your use of the word 'liberal' on reddit will get you some dislikes. Its not that you are wrong, just that word is typically used in politics, while you are referring to a living arrangement dependent on wife's family
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/24 10:54 PM
0

You are not obliged to cooperate with a forensic accountant. In fact during discovery, just give the basic info and ask your wife's lawyer to force discovery from other financial institutions if needed. As someone explained below, its not worth it for business values < $10M.
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/24 09:42 PM
2

"You do nothing. You say nothing. You are a nobody. Your lawyers and accountants are somebodies. You ONLY do as you are told" This is highly arrogant and presumptions. Many on this forum have gone through lengthy divorces and have spent years studying the law and sitting in court for friends. Many of us here have better understanding of how courts work than some lawyers and most important, we don't work for a fee or billable hours, we work to help men
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/24 06:45 PM
1

No, no and hell no. At least not in this country. All 50 states depend on the opposite party to bring any dispute to notice of court. If you write I own Uranus and your wife's lawyer agrees then the court will try to give half of it to your wife. Ditto, if Elon Musk says tomorrow he is bankrupt (which he actually did in his divorce) and his ex-wife is unable to prove otherwise, then court will not investigate The only option your wife's lawyer has is to force disclosure in case of hidden assets.…
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/24 06:31 PM
-1

Simple question to you. If I file taxes separately and during discovery, I state I have no business and do not have income sufficient to file taxes, how is the court going to find out? Instead of typing something silly about the court actually caring to audit your LLC financial statement like you say, why don't you give practical advice, like simply declaring a loss? A lot of what you have written applies only to an ideal world in which a 'divorce IRS' exists to keep track and audit what you dis…
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/24 06:22 PM
1

You don't have much recourse unless she is willing to cooperate. Forcing discovery through judgements is a long and unsure process
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/24 06:58 PM
6

Yes, getting married in the US is the worst. Large profit driven divorce industry and 50 different sets of laws, also largest number of lawyers in the world
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/24 06:45 PM
2

Looks like she made a dumb deal
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/24 06:34 PM
1

And impossible to argue with those who are ignorant
/r/MensRights24/02/24 03:08 AM
1

Tells me you are clueless about procedure to force a paternity test and order collection of child support outside marriage
/r/MensRights23/02/24 10:24 PM
0

Usual advice, take a sabbatical, say zero income and impossible to find similar paying job in area, let Judge impute and decide as needed. Almost certain to get a lower amount vs. going there saying you make a lot of money and want to be 'fair'
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/24 10:20 PM
1

Prove me wrong, show me as a % of cases, how many women have gone through the trouble of proving paternity and asking for CS outside marriage. Don't include cases where women ask for welfare and child services jumps in to determine paternity
/r/MensRights23/02/24 09:57 PM
1

De-jure no, De-facto absolutely yes
/r/MensRights23/02/24 09:50 PM
5

What a long winded post which does not offer any solutions. If all you want to do is avoid alimony, sign legal separation after marriage, its just a form, you can remain married. If you want to avoid Child support, you can either sign a parenting plan after the child is born or just have kids without marrying
/r/MensRights23/02/24 07:34 PM
5

Didn't you ask the same question a few days ago? Generally the answer is no, you will not have to pay alimony after you retire. So take a sabbatical right now or just quit and say you will give her 0 as income is 0
/r/Divorce_Men15/02/24 01:37 AM
1

Definitely not and alimony also cannot be written off. You have to make the best attempt to not pay alimony
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/24 12:33 AM
1

Not a CPA but this was what I was told, marriage is the only 'fully legal' way to transfer unlimited wealth without tax or oversight between two people. I never said there were any income tax benefits.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 10:46 PM
6

Need state and country for better answer. Alimony is definitely not a given. In most cases, alimony is a negotiated deal and no one forces the man to pay (although the legal system makes it appear they have to pay). I would suggest go for zero, tell her you won't pay a cent and irrespective of what your lawyer says let her make the effort to force you to pay.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 08:48 PM
-3

If you have enough $$ and know how to legally protect yourself, marriage offers important tax benefits (estate planning, trusts, unlimited wealth transfer etc.)
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 08:41 PM
2

Married filing separately was created for couples who don't want to share any financial information that appears on tax forms. Doing so for several years prior to filing divorce makes for a strong case for keeping what you have earned asset wise. However most men choose to get a lower tax rate by filing jointly and then crib about losing assets in divorce
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/24 05:15 PM
2

Its definitely a gender issue and your possible exception does not make the rule
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/24 06:44 PM
4

Can't you drag it out a year till he turns 18, then just cash out and move out of FL?
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/24 11:09 PM
6

General advice given to 55+ men looking to divorce. Retire first and file, Judge cannot force you back to work. Retire and cash out your retirement accounts. Don't pay anything related to Children as all calculators are based on income which should be zero after retirement and cash out
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/24 09:57 PM
3

LoL looks like you got screwed!
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/24 01:49 AM
1

Sounds pennywise and pound foolish. Trying to save at most few $100 per paycheck on health insurance while disclosing everything you have and agreeing to forgo half of it
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/24 05:21 PM
1

The correct approach to take is legal separation, but given lack of info on state and county and also using terms like 43M, 37F etc. without telling us when they were married tells me you won't have the gumption to take serious steps needed to secure finances.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/24 04:57 PM
2

Divorce has no impact on debt or who owes it. If you took a loan or have credit card debt its yours to repay. Its on you to make a case for community property i.e. ask your wife to take 50% of it, she has to agree and the Judge has to sign. Then she owes you 50%, the entire debt is still in your name. Just to be clear, the court will NOT do anything for you. Their job in most divorce cases is to sign off on the agreement
/r/Divorce_Men01/02/24 09:43 PM
1

Plenty of advantages, you get to decide which route to take (legal separation, joint filing etc.), where to file (state, county etc.), online or not, what to disclose (assets, job income etc.), time to prepare financially, get necessary signatures etc.
/r/Divorce_Men01/02/24 06:51 PM
1

You are lucky, people have been arrested for $50 non payment. On the other hand you have made some classic mistakes while dealing with the court. 1) Prompt response using a lawyer 2) agreeing to pay 3) admitting you paid late I have been detailing these mistakes, they start right from the initial filing. Men disclose income, assets, job details etc. fully cooperate on every step. Then they agree and sign on every court order (never contested or forced). Once everything is decided and the case is…
/r/Divorce_Men01/02/24 06:02 PM
2

You cannot add unilaterally, however as others have stated, your only obligation is the CS (which can also be contested). She and her lawyer can ask for anything from you, but you don't pay and let them keep going to court. They give up after a few years. Heck, even the govt. gives up trying to collect CS from deadbeats
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/24 10:50 PM
1

Patience and preparation always help
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/24 10:12 PM
0

You do legal separation right after marriage and you are protected during divorce. I have been repeating on this forum for a couple years now. I didn't know it when I married
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 07:53 PM
-1

You could have easily stopped it or separated your finances. Legal separation (i.e. separating finances) is an option available for married couples in most states. If you don't know about it or you are misled by feminist lawyers, that's on you
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 05:50 PM
1

Use married filing jointly, its better than filing separate in most cases. The only time you want to use married filing separately is when you have an address in another state and don't want to share tax info with your wife. You can use the 'coveted single status' or 'head of household' only after you get the signed papers
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 03:31 PM
2

What do you plan to do if she doesn't pay?
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 03:26 PM
2

You'll still owe taxes at max. rate if you pull while working. It all depends on your income, tax brackets, $$ saved for retirement etc. Some people are better off splitting 50% with ex.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 05:59 PM
1

Wait till you are 65, retire, then cash out 401k and file for divorce, she will get 0 alimony
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 05:40 PM
3

If your guy has been smart enough to get legal separation, there is little you can do at this point. Related to spousal support, you can't say you stayed at home to let him flourish in 'his career'. You simply chose not to work and now want to mooch off your ex's earnings and don't want to earn and provide for yourself. I would say the $1000/month is also too much for a choice you make.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 04:28 AM
1

There is no actual law for anything related to splitting assets. If she agrees to the $11.1K, then its $11.1K, is you ask the Judge he will simply divide equity by 2 and ask you to settle
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 02:48 AM
1

That is the way they work, its not because they are overloaded, its to prevent 'fishing' expeditions into third party financial institutions and others who have no connection to the divorce from getting dragged in. In my search of local court database, I could very few banks listed as a 'Garnishee Defendant' and even in those cases, the court never ordered anything from them.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 02:40 AM
1

Show a negative value for the business and buy her out. Then work to make it profitable. Elon Musk claimed Tesla was bankrupt during his divorce and the court accepted it. Family courts have neither the authority nor competence to evaluate finances, they take what is presented unless contested
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 10:40 PM
2

You will lose in court as judges typically don't look into detail financial arrangements, if she lists it as a loan, the judge will simply divide by 2
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 10:36 PM
0

Its a lengthy court process to get tax returns, just tell them you forgot the pwd for online tax returns and show them numbers stating your business is not making any money and you will not pay alimony. If you filed jointly then you may be in trouble if she knows the pwd and you filed online
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 10:07 PM
0

Why do you want to do this the round about way, simply say your business does not make any money and don't give tax returns
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 09:42 PM
4

Even in countries without no-fault divorce, its always possible to live separately ,claim abandonment and dissolve the marriage. The only disadvantage is that women will not get the $$ without a no-fault option
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 07:28 PM
3

I don't think you have any such legal right
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 12:09 AM
2

When you voluntarily disclose your income and agree to pay child support, you have told the court you will comply irrespective of your employment. There will not be a change in obligation due to loss of employment. You have to file for modification and make your case again. On the other hand, if you did not disclose employment and the court forced a money judgement on you, there is a good chance to ask for reduction
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/24 06:30 PM
1

Nothing prevents you, its very tough to force financial disclosure, the court has to order a third party (the financial institution) to hand over confidential information. They won't do so unless clear proof of wilful, deceptive, hiding of marital property is presented (not some printed out bank statements or credit report)
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/24 06:14 PM
1

Also what no one tells you, asset disclosure is de-facto voluntary, i.e. there is no divorce IRS to enforce or check your financial info. It all depends on your wife's lawyer and how much money they are ready to spend attempting a forced disclosure. Also what no one tells you, the Judge will take what you have disclosed, what she has disclosed, add and divide by two. This is not a financial fraud case, nor are you in tax court and there are really no laws related to how need to measure 'wealth' …
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/24 05:20 PM
3

DIY, no attorney
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/24 04:46 AM
2

I have little hope for Canada, based on what I know they are still stuck in the 80's recognizing common law marriages and granting alimony. Won't be surprised if this passes
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/24 02:43 PM
1

I agree, censorship has increased considerably on this forum, also seeing MOD posting a sticky comment on several questions asked
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/24 03:18 PM
1

Are we really complaining for $190/month? My gym membership costs more!
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/24 04:22 PM
1

The only way she can come after you is by claiming you hid assets during divorce or forced her to sign divorce papers (this provision is available throughout life). However either of these is extremely difficult to prove in court and I have not seen a single case in my county. So I would say no, your concern is not legitimate as the chances of her success are very small
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/24 04:18 PM
1

Another de-facto, de-jure issue. Debt incurred post separation is treated as de-facto separate but by law its still marital property. What this means is you should ask for it as separate but your wife's lawyer can choose to stick to the letter of law and challenge what you say
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/24 04:11 PM
0

See if your county has an option to file jointly with asset split agreed outside and court does not need to judge. Your dream scenario is possible, you just need to talk finances and get her to sign before she talks to her lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/24 09:32 PM
5

If you have disclosed all your financials, there is really not much you can do
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/24 09:28 PM
4

who says you are the bad guy?
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/24 09:26 PM
5

Yes, I will for tax and estate benefits, with proper asset protection in place
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/24 01:03 AM
1

Its 100% correct to say that prenups don't matter as a general rule. For short duration marriages, courts do consider prenups but as marital property is small there is not a huge $$ savings due to prenup. In long term, high value marriages, they are mostly useless for men. The only prenups that seem to hold are ones that give 50% to the woman. It's good for lawyers though, they can make good $$ writing the prenup and when it comes time to separate they have a ready made list of pre and post mari…
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/24 10:34 PM
1

Is your wife's lawyer a finance expert to be able to evaluate your business better than you can do it yourself? As others have stated, go with $4M evaluation, then offer half to her
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/24 07:29 PM
10

You are failing to understand the problem, family court system and laws are biased against men. A woman is guaranteed to make money in divorce, that is why they file
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/24 06:51 PM
25

What you are failing to see is that men don't have a family court system, media and government machinery to back up any mistakes 'made by men'. I challenge you, show me one case in any of the 50 states in past 10 years, where a woman was punished financially for cheating ex. no alimony, less CS etc.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/24 06:47 PM
5

You should be contacting asset protection professionals not attorneys. A family law attorney has no idea about finances and trusts (although they claim to know, most don't know anything) . Your aims are contradictory, if you don't preserve your wealth, you will not have the war chest needed for a long custody battle, nor will you be able to reduce or eliminate alimony by taking a sabbatical or moving to another state after taking a large home equity loan
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/24 11:11 PM
3

Not sure what is preventing you from pulling the plug. If its fear that you'll lose 50% of your money, that is absolutely unfounded, given that you plan for a year or two. There are some excellent financial moves you can make long term to convert marital property to separate property
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/24 09:54 PM
2

Legal separation will work in WI. You can split other assets any way you wish and keep the house and apartment together. Once court approved, asset split is binding
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/24 03:23 AM
5

Most likely she can't prove a thing
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/24 12:34 AM
1

Penalty is very unlikely or most likely told to scare people. I looked at about 6K divorces in my county, less than 1% have gone through forced disclosure and there was no contempt of court. Your calculation is incorrect, there will be an eventual tax, keeping $500K is not going to happen
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/24 12:19 AM
1

Still better than 50% pre tax haircut. For $1M, cashing out you get to keep $600K, splitting lets you keep $350K. If you are caught after cashing out and she can somehow prove and the judge agrees, you keep $300K
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 10:42 PM
0

She is not 'getting anything' unless you 'give it to her'. That's how it works with cash, gold, bitcoin, trusts etc. or any other non traceable (or hidden asset)
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 10:39 PM
1

Other way round, if you are close to retirement, simply cashing out and moving to another state is an option. Not possible with small kids
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 10:09 PM
1

With 401K you can cash it out, take the 10% penalty and not disclose during divorce. Its much better than a pension
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 10:08 PM
1

Why are you suggesting prenups? Its much better to have a ceremony and not sign the certificate. You should have come to this forum earlier, we could have saved you a bunch of $$
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 10:04 PM
2

Can you post the country and state you are in? Lawyers cannot tell you the most important thing about the divorce process, its de-facto voluntary unless you are very rich
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 10:00 PM
2

I think OP refers to legal separation, not a private separation contract, aka prenup or post nup. In some states, you can sign a contract, use that to get 'legally separated' and get it approved by the court(you are still married, but your finances are separate)
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 09:34 PM
1

Which state are you in? Legal separation can help you keep all you have earned or be totally worthless depending on your state. As a general rule, I always advise legal separation where each spouse keeps the assets they control, right after marriage. Legal separation dissolves community property in your state and removes spousal fiduciary responsibility. In some states, you cannot contest legal separation when granted. The point you make about her being able to claim money after separation is im…
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 09:32 PM
3

How do you plan to prove their marriage if they don't sign the certificate?
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 08:45 PM
1

Unless you filed joint, they can't. Even with tax records its only past income. Its a family court with lawyers and judges, not IRS or accounting department. They have neither the time nor the skill to go through all the documents, what you declare will be divided by 2. Anything you hide, is very difficult to unearth and prove
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 03:38 AM
3

We are trying to wake you up to reality of family courts in the US. Marital property laws by themselves are very unfair as men contribute most to building wealth but will lose 50% at a minimum. There is wide judicial discretion which usually means women get more than 50%, don't have to pay debts, get alimony and CS. The de-facto voluntary financial disclosure at the beginning of the process is the biggest trap. Every lawyer will tell you its the law to disclose everything (which is not true). Th…
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/24 09:02 PM
3

Not too familiar with laws and courts in India but from what I've heard, its mostly corruption and bad judges that make life difficult. The law says something about conjugal rights but courts cannot force a couple to stay together
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/24 10:38 PM
1

Post nups are not taken seriously in CA unlike other states like TX
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/24 06:20 PM
2

Unlike CS, SS is almost impossible to collect outside Canada.
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/24 05:33 PM
4

Based on previous discussion, some countries have signed treaties with each other to enforce CS and alimony. Its a complete myth that friendly relations between US and Canada make this easier to collect money versus US and Mexico or US and Cuba. The procedure for her to collect CS is very lengthy. She has to file in the US court where you reside and go through custody agreement and Canadian court order. If court agrees, then you get a chance to defend (you can simply say you are unable to pay as…
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/24 04:29 PM
7

No, it depends on state law, legal separation is not recognized federally, it does not need to be reported to USCIS. Check with immigration attorney
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/24 05:12 AM
5

More info is needed. What visa is she on? H4? Did you sign the affidavit of support to bring her on a visa? As suggested both of you are better off working out a deal where you are legally separated but still married with zero alimony and zero CS and 50:50 custody as a condition
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/24 02:59 AM
2

Make it clear you don't have much money. The process will be quick
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/24 01:01 AM
1

The most communist of community property states; WA. However those are the rules in King County for now, once legally separated, the agreement carries over comma, semicolon and period for indefinite time. It cannot be contested, it cannot be changed. Its the best post nup agreement you can get in some states.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/24 01:56 AM
-3

If you had posted here prior to filing we could have provided you tips on how to save $$
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/24 01:39 AM
3

Legal separation filed online in 22 where we checked 'spouses keep the assets they currently control', marriage was ok at this point, but I wanted to separate our assets. Filed for divorce in 23 and legal separation agreement carries over and cannot be contested. She found out the hard way
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/24 01:31 AM
2

2% of net wealth
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/24 12:02 AM
1

Divorce lawyers are looking to make money off men, not save them money!
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/24 06:38 PM
1

So what's the argument against using a bank which does not use Chex Systems?
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/24 05:17 PM
1

No, the entire disclosure process is de-facto voluntary. If you don't want it included in the divorce you don't disclose. Its up to your wife's lawyer to discover anything he believes is hidden
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/24 05:15 PM
5

The $5M is just below the threshold I would recommend for a trust. However given future payout and iffy IPO evaluations, it should be easy to keep most of the $5M through simple non disclosure. If available in your state, I would suggest looking into legal separation where asset disclosure is not required. Coming to your LLC, it again seems to be a great way to get favorable financial settlement for you PROVIDED you don't shoot yourself in the foot by voluntarily disclosing it as worth anything …
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/24 04:59 PM
2

You are providing this voluntarily during financial disclosure. Lawyers lie that its illegal to not disclose bank information and most men simply comply. This information and your consent is then used to obtain the reports (similar to credit check)
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/24 12:49 AM
3

Its similar to credit report but for consumer deposits " ChexSystems is a reporting agency that looks at activity related to consumer deposit accounts and reports on everything from how many accounts you’ve tried to open to why you’ve had past accounts closed. If your ChexSystems record shows negative information, opening a checking account can be difficult"
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/24 11:53 PM
3

Simple search, not endorsing any bank here, many are crappy with poor customer service https://www.forbes.com/advisor/banking/best-banks-no-chexsystems/
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/24 11:52 PM
5

Based on what I've heard about CA, its wild west with zero enforcement against women
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/24 05:32 PM
2

Which county, state are you located? Big difference in enforcement across the US. In many large cities, enforcement is non existent and contempt is ignored. The general rule is that courts want you to work out issues between yourselves
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/24 04:45 PM
2

Unless your estate is over $27M , you should be looking to gift wealth vs. creating a trust
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/24 12:34 AM
2

File immediately, your legal relationship with her should be broken ASAP
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/24 09:24 PM
1

Why are you transferring half your paycheck every month? Also why are you taking half the money from your joint account? Everything should be wiped clean, nothing should be declared and you should let her lawyer do the discovery and get a money judgement against you if he can. This is not a criminal case and you are not a criminal where cooperating with the law will give you a lower sentence or declining a plea bargain may get you a higher sentence.
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/24 04:38 AM
2

Whats the max cap for CS in TX? Couldn't find a definitive answer online.I read somewhere that Elon Musk would pay max $2,700 per month for 3 kids with 50:50 custody, is this really what happens in Tx courts?
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/24 12:39 AM
6

If you have no property why are you leaving anything to her? Just say marital property =0 and let her prove otherwise
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 08:46 PM
1

What are you specifically suing him for? Was there an adverse money judgement against you, i.e. did the judge order forcible seizure of assets and did your financial institution comply? If not, there is no use suing as the entire divorce process is de-facto voluntary. You are disclosing information voluntarily and agreeing to negotiate, then signing off on the terms voluntarily. Did your lawyer cheat you by failing to mention the process is de-facto voluntary? Not really, they don't have to tell…
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 07:39 PM
3

Biggest one is unlimited wealth transfer with no questions asked. Some states (like WA) have 20% estate taxes kicking in at $2M + (cost of a house). Having a spouse residing out of state is a massive benefit.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 04:46 PM
3

This may be a de-jure interpretation or what is written in law, but how easy is it for a woman to file a day after marriage and live on that income? What I have realized over the last few years is that what happens de-facto is important and the laws are only secondary
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 06:06 AM
2

I may do it again. Quite confident about the steps I need to take for financial protection and I may need the tax benefits given only to married couples
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 06:01 AM
2

Your ability to 'figure it out' may not have any impact on the judgement. This is not tax court where forensic accountants go over their findings in front of a neutral judge after obtaining necessary financial disclosure orders. Most family courts in the US simply take what has been disclosed and divide by 2. If you suspect she is hiding financial information, you'll need a separate order to force disclosure where you'll need to show proof of bank account and balance. All states strictly prohibi…
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 05:58 AM
2

Unless we are in the $10M+ range, there is not really much a forensic accountant can do, nor is there much benefit in trying to dig through all the account information. Your best bet is to hope your wife discloses all the information accurately as its a tedious process to try and locate hidden financial info. In the US most financial disclosure during divorce is de-facto voluntary, i.e. there is no court or government enforcement of financial information
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/24 11:17 PM
1

I had cashed mine out a few years prior after paying the 10% penalty, it was never mentioned and never came up.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/24 11:03 PM
24

Best to file quickly and get her signatures on a favorable financial settlement for you. Very soon her guilt will turn to anger
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/23 11:57 PM
2

If you have disclosed everything and you are ready to pay, she has every of chance of getting it. The Judge will simply see you make 100K more and ask you to pay her 50K (and move on to the next case) However if you don't disclose un-vested stock, RSU etc. and are ready to fight it out, she has zero chance of getting alimony with her income
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/23 11:18 PM
1

It makes a big difference if you can quit or take a sabbatical for a year. 1) Straight away you can put 0 as your current income which forces your wife's lawyer to go through discovery. There are at least 2 more steps before they can attempt to impute your income. Only 2% cases go through forced disclosure so odds are your wife's lawyer will try to negotiate a lower amount 2) Not disclosing assets or declaring low value of asset is lot more believable with zero income 3) You have a much better a…
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/23 11:06 PM
1

One should not stress but one should always be prepared, do not assume community property laws are gender neutral and will work in the mans favor if he earns less. No legal separation or post-nups are valid in Texas, so you'll have to do your research
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/23 10:26 PM
1

Not related to divorce, Mod should lock
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/23 09:47 PM
2

Always remember that any financial disclosure is de-facto voluntary. If you don't the difference between de-jure and de-facto, you need to do at least a year of research before starting your divorce
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/23 07:46 AM
1

What are the wishes of the biological parents if they are around? If you are living with one of the parents your chances of getting sole custody are much higher
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/23 10:05 PM
12

Exception does not prove the rule, women marrying up and wanting to be looked after is the rule
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/23 10:00 PM
7

The law is written this way but women spend much more and generally get custody of kids, so no, you will get screwed even if she earns more. Even of you are a stay at home dad, your income imputation is higher vs a SAHM
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/23 09:59 PM
2

Did you pay readily or was it collected forcibly? Money judgements by family courts usually don't have enforcement mechanism, so you should wait for them to forcibly collect
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/23 07:14 PM
1

General advice is to quit your job by taking a sabbatical, disclose zero as your income and let your wife and lawyer do the hard job of trying to convince the judge to impute your income. Usually works out in your favor despite what is written on lawyer websites
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/23 04:57 AM
2

Just 3 months and already threatening? Why don't you file first and then talk to a lawyer? There is not much help a lawyer can provide for such a short duration marriage and frankly there are not many mistakes you can make if you do it yourself. As someone suggested, don't have kids with her
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/23 03:20 AM
1

Yes, it definitely has a negative impact for you if her lawyer brings it up. You may be asked to pay for her treatment and the kids
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/23 03:00 AM
1

You need to close ALL shared accounts ASAP!! Quickly move the money to a new account. There is a significant danger that any money she transfers to her account becomes her separate property
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/23 05:28 AM
4

Yes, plenty of changes at the local and county level. Some at state level as well. Financial disclosure has been made de-facto voluntary in most states and we have e-filing options for Legal separation with no financial disclosure required. Same with alimony, its possible to waive soon after marriage using legal separation. For the rich, lots more options like offshore trusts, llc's, crypto, insurance etc. Some child support reform as well with Texas capping payments, some states giving PTA offs…
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/23 05:17 AM
5

If you don't give us detail on State, Country, rough idea on income and assets, the advice you receive will be useless. There are several ways to preserve what you have earned in the event of a divorce, but its all state,country and county dependent
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/23 06:59 PM
3

You are not giving the entire picture. In the US, there is no fault divorce and all property post marriage is considered marital property no matter who owns it. There are domestic violence laws which are misused. Its possible for men to lose most of their money during divorce, this rarely happens in India. India has its own faults as you mention with huge involvement of police.
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/23 08:03 PM
2

Yes lawyer or just file for legal separation ASAP. Its a short term marriage, should be easy
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/23 07:57 PM
1

Do you really want custody while you are sick? I would say your strategy should be to focus on your treatment and how to pay for it.
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/23 07:56 PM
3

Simple fact that no minor kids are involved gives you an advantage You have to give more info. How are assets split in Curacao during divorce? Does control of asset during marriage determine ownership post divorce? What was said in the prenup? Can you cash out your retirement account? You need to plan well, but I think you have a fair chance of getting to keep what you have made during marriage. As a warning, DO NOT HAVE KIDS WITH HER
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/23 07:48 PM
4

Not really, spouses are allowed to have bank information during marriage. Spouses are also allowed to hide bank information from each other during marriage. The entire financial disclosure portion during divorce is de-facto voluntary, i.e. you are expected to use the info about your spouse's finances against them to get more money. The court is not going to investigate or verify any financial info
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/23 08:05 PM
7

Its a combination of ignorance (of what you are up against), overconfidence (in your abilities) and a belief it 'it won't happen to me'.
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/23 06:44 PM
1

General experience and case research tells us that Judges don't care about stories or worry about hidden assets. They split into half whatever is disclosed and close the case
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/23 08:00 PM
15

Its a simple filing of one form in the US court. Just say the court has no jurisdiction as the marriage took place in India and respondent lives there. Don't worry about the spousal support, she has no way to collect
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/23 03:37 AM
1

The judge should be impeached if this is true, they are not allowed to look into asset split if its not contested. In fact several counties don't need you to disclose financial information if its uncontested.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/23 10:58 PM
2

That is what I would suggest, but we have a bunch of lawyer types commenting that seem to have little knowledge about anything not involving lawyers, courts, financial disclosures etc. Looks like simple procedures are hidden from men on purpose
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/23 09:54 PM
2

Court will accept what you present and many counties have option to not disclose anything. It looks like you are in the 4% or so 'strategic non contested divorces'. Are you getting any tax benefit out of your divorce?
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/23 09:19 PM
7

The court will almost certainly accept any agreement between spouses. Even 100-0 or even giving all debt to one and assets to the other (the debt still needs to be repaid). Its extremely rare for the court to interfere. Many counties have option to not disclose settlement to court, Jeff Bezos chose this route and not a single financial document of his was filed
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/23 09:16 PM
1

Its not just formal documentation, by voluntarily disclosing your assets, you are revealing to the family court system how much money they can take from you. The smart rich ones ex. Jeff Bezos and the like never disclose in court, its always done outside
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/23 07:47 PM
2

You can always give her money outside of a court ordered judgement, the IRS gift tax limit is ~$13M. Don't waste your time and money on courts and lawyers. If you are really in agreement, I would suggest disclosing 0 assets getting the divorce and then giving the money
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/23 05:54 PM
2

Legal separation or equivalent a day after marriage or a post dated legal separation prior to marriage. Once you file for legal separation there is no community property or fiduciary duty to your spouse, but you retain tax and other benefits of marital status
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/23 05:47 PM
3

I don't disagree that men are getting looted, its just that men are simply not aware of their options or simply to scared to put up a fight.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/23 12:41 AM
1

Nope, in WA state where I've looked at filings, there is a separate category called CIR (Committed Intimate Relationship). Its a separate form, a separate process and the Judge does not automatically pass an order for financial restraint (unlike regular dissolution). You have to prove all three aspects (Commitment, Intimacy and a Relationship)
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/23 12:25 AM
2

I would not use a prenup for future weddings. There are better options available in most US states. #3 is probably the shakiest of prenups as it can be easily challenged in court and if a dispute arises, Judges simple divide whatever is disclosed. Therefore #2 is most likely to stand in court and is also the default state law. No, any and every asset split is fair Yes, I may get married again (depending on tax benefits involved)
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/23 12:22 AM
1

I have the stats, common law filings are rare and almost never contested
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/23 10:54 PM
1

Yes, I believe I now know better. There is a big difference between defacto and dejure. This is true almost everywhere from immigration, employment,tax to corporate law and most certainly in family law.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/23 10:30 PM
1

I did not list them in the financials, they are future earnings. Hopefully you understand that disclosing assets during divorce is de-facto voluntary. Its a tricky legal term that most men don't understand and all lawyers like to exploit by saying you should disclose everything
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/23 09:43 PM
3

Having been a moderator I would like to caution users that reddit is not very kind to loosely moderated subreddits. This has been a great forum for talking about issues that cannot be discussed elsewhere, would hate to lose it.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/23 09:31 PM
2

It depends on which state and country we are talking about but plenty of options including pre-emptive legal separation exist if its just the courts you are worried about. Also in most US states, getting asset split using common law is a complicated two step process and not 'married in eyes of law' like you state. I am sure you didn't mean it but you are implying no live in relation is possible with a woman without marriage. This is flatly not true and 100% brainwashing technique used by the fem…
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/23 08:14 PM
4

Its important to realize that most of the financial obligation is coming due to signing a legally binding contract in the form of a marriage certificate. You can definitely have a marriage without signing the certificate
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/23 07:46 PM
3

Absolutely untrue that you are one man against a system. There is plenty of information available online (provided you skip the first 20 pages on google search). You should prepare well for long, do your research and strike hard and fast. No, you will not get taken to the cleaners. We have debated several times that prenups are not good but its mostly the fault of men for not studying and understanding the laws and the process
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/23 07:35 PM
1

You legally separate soon after marriage, but continue to live in same house as a married couple. Your federal legal status is 'married' but state legal status is 'legally separated'. So you file taxes, have joint bank accounts, live as a couple in same house etc. but if you need to divorce you are treated as single within your state. I believe lawyers are simply following standard procedure when they advise men. Divorce corp. understands that most assets are controlled by men and the only way t…
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/23 06:08 PM
1

If its uncontested it usually means you get the assets you have control over. As you control 1/3 of the home equity, you don't need to sign off on any refinance which does not give you a good deal
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/23 10:27 PM
3

2) The 50:50 has always applied only to what has been agreed by both parties as marital property. If you don't disclose, the other party has to try and force disclosure, prove you are both the owner and have control of the asset AND make a case for dissipation. 3) The complete opposite is true. First off banks don't disclose transfers to private parties (divorce lawyers always lie about this), you need a case to force disclosure. Second, there are laws against 'fishing' for financial information…
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/23 07:47 PM
7

But give them half your money + alimony +CS because reddit users and lawyers will frighten you if you don't comply
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/23 02:03 AM
1

It really depends on when the order for financial restraints was passed, which state/county we are talking about, what other common assets you have, how much your wife is ready to spend on hostile discovery etc. The general rule in a divorce is that whatever asset is declared is up for grabs, there is no going around it.
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/23 10:06 PM
2

I have tried to provide that in my comments, the real helpful tips are jealously guarded by the rich and are only accessible to tiny minority of wealthy, knowledgeable people.
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/23 09:30 PM
4

Same experience here, I have offered help and there are a few who have reached out through DM's and taken my advice. I feel what happens is as follows: Husband thinks there will be no divorce, never prepares for it, or even if it takes place he thinks wife will be happy to agree with whatever custody and asset split husband proposes. Husband gets hit with court summons, panics, goes to lawyer and gets shocked to know he has to disclose everything he owns and the lawyer tells him by law he has to…
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/23 09:25 PM
1

Broad and difficult to answer question. Any normal spending is allowed, even very big ticket items like a house, car, expensive surgery, gifts to parents and even gambling. The catch is these must have been planned prior to what was mentioned as the date of marriage breakdown. With what you consider separate property even larger spend is allowed. The overall discovery process and the entire agreement is enforced by the other side, i.e. the Judge will not go through each transaction and determine…
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/23 09:12 PM
1

Yes, yes, yes, do take her as your 'legally separated wife', i.e. tell her you completely forgive her and are ready to give the marriage a second shot provided she agrees to legal separation where you keep all assets you have earned and no alimony. I believe fate is giving you an excellent chance to protect yourself in case of a future divorce
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 04:44 PM
1

98-2 in my favor but it involved getting her to sign on joint legal separation, online filing using facilitators, using option in my county to keep assets you control,creation of trusts, offshore assets and not owning any real property. Its possible to do so without a prenup but very much complicated
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 11:12 PM
0

Given that you are so close to retirement, what on earth is stopping you from cashing out your savings and moving to another state? It really stuns me why so many men with movable assets choose to remain in same state as wife and file for 50-50 when all they have to do is drive a few hours across with their money and let the wife chase them!
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 11:01 PM
1

This is not true in many states, CS does depend on family income of ex-wife and also of father. If either re-marries you can petition for relief even if its not included in calculators
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 10:57 PM
0

Lets be realistic, with most high income dual earner couples, the husband earns 64% while the wife earns 36%, they spend about 80% of combined earning and both benefit from this spending (houses, kids, cars etc.) so 40% each. That means the wife gets to spend 4% more than she earns and the husband is saving 24% of combined earnings. If they were not legally married, in 10 years the wife would have a big negative net worth and the husband would have saved much more. Ask yourself, is 15 years of p…
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 06:59 PM
5

I believe in Sweden you have no fault divorce and don't need your wife's signature to file. File on your own, claim everything you have earned as your own and let her have fun contesting
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 06:45 PM
2

If her husband is reading this forum he will know how to avoid that fate
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 06:09 PM
3

You certainly seem to feel entitled to get his money to help you 'stand up on your feet'. You seem to forget, he actually paid the bills during your period of sacrifice, he earned ALL the money during your period of sacrifice and he earned ALL the wealth. Now that he wants out, you feel this arrangement should continue till you 'land on your feet', that is why its called entitlement
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 06:07 PM
2

As to what is fair in asset split its fairly obvious to me. Any assets earned by husband's income or his savings should belong to him with all the increase in value. Likewise with 401K too, there should be no penalty due to marriage. The 50-50 split is a relic of history when women were working at home and the catholic church believed it should all be divided in half. Back then men could physically enforce a woman's obligation to the household during the marriage and courts would generally look …
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 05:24 PM
1

Not clear what you want, do you want to reduce CS obligation due to your marriage and consequence of adding other dependents? If so, you want to file for CS modification and make your case
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 04:48 PM
1

This is a somewhat pessimistic view of looking at things. Its true that many things about the divorce process are overtly complex, however we do have many non profits and court facilitators that can and do help with paperwork. Many states and county courts have simplified forms and provided for e-filing. Some of them provide for not disclosing financial assets and keeping assets under your control as separate property. Most lawyers will not sit with you and go through all these easy options (for…
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 04:00 PM
1

The US does not have any great protection against abusive stepdads either. You have to make a case based on abuse and custody violation, which is tough to prove
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 03:46 PM
1

Typically when one spouse hides income or assets carefully from the other spouse, your choices are bleak. When wealth is hidden off shore its effectively out of the divorce process (unless she chooses to voluntarily disclose it). My suggestion, try giving her the BS that not declaring assets or faking financial numbers is illegal and she'll likely land in jail once she enters the US. Its the same trick lawyers use on men. I wouldn't try to waste money on a foreign lawyer, courts in other countri…
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 01:00 AM
3

If you are in King County, why would you not take two signatures from her and file jointly? That way no need to serve and no need to disclose finances, it can all be sorted out without going through court by e-filing
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/23 10:44 PM
0

The financial discovery process is enforced by agreement or litigation from opposite party. i.e. if you leave out a financial asset and the other party does not contest, it is not considered part of the divorce. I have checked and validated with several attorneys, there is no law which forces disclosure of current net worth. Likewise if community property is listed as separate or vice versa and not contested, it is treated as disclosed The court does not check or validate and no government autho…
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/23 10:38 PM
2

As mentioned in earlier comments, cohabitation after divorce is perfectly legal in all 50 states and does not create additional financial obligation. Any custody arrangement remains in effect. Long term cohabitation could put you in a common law situation but your divorce will protect any assets under your control. As for drawbacks, 96% or so divorces are contested and hostile, so its not a good idea if you had a bitter experience. If you are in the 4% joint filers who do it for tax benefits, he…
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/23 09:50 PM
0

I an afraid you'll massively complicate a simple divorce in your country. If you really have no financial obligation, then what are you waiting for, just file and get it done. In the US there are several complications, once you sign affidavit of support its not legally binding in divorce but it does not resolve you from burden of supporting her till she spends 10 years working or chooses becomes a US citizen. Remember this is a permanent lifelong obligation enforced by the federal government, so…
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/23 09:16 PM
5

Agree with our mod here, redpill is a separate topic which deals with non divorce issues
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/23 05:11 PM
3

Once you file, the judge is supposed to automatically issue a temporary financial restraining order preventing dissipation of assets. However as with everything in family court, there is no enforcement mechanism and either spouse can freely spend the asset in their control. If you don't like that spending, you have to raise a separate case in court
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/23 04:48 PM
1

I would say take it, you are getting much more than the 50-50 split. Even better ask her to agree to some other terms as well
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 10:51 PM
0

It depends on what you are getting in return for being amicable, take 50-50 asset split as the worst case and if you get a deal, lets say 90-10 asset split in your favor, you can be amicable
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 10:02 PM
6

The golden rule to all married men applies: Protect your ass(ets)!
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 08:07 PM
0

Then solution seems obvious, don't pay and let her take you to court. Defend yourself without a lawyer by claiming lack of income
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 06:19 PM
2

What is the enforcement mechanism for spousal support in MI? i.e. what will happen if you don't pay
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 04:52 PM
7

Exactly, incomes and spending habits are unequal which almost always means the man earns more and the woman spends more
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 04:16 PM
4

I have the stats on this from my analysis of ~9K divorces in King County, WA Only 4% were joint filing with no court appearance needed and no financial document submitted Out of the 4%, half were strategic divorces (i.e. Divorce to get tax benefits, move out of state like Jeff Bezos, married for greencard and then separated etc.). I don't consider these real divorces as there is no real conflict or 'breakdown of marriage', they just want a different legal state to get some benefit. The other hal…
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 04:11 PM
4

Great job! Why did we get the nsfw tag? There is no adult content in any of the posts here
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/23 08:00 PM
1

The forms are mostly similar but big difference is that in King County you can request not to be contacted by court and file through court facilitators, i.e. you just need two signatures from your wife (agree to join and final orders), the rest you can fill on YOUR terms, file on your own and get Legal separation papers within 90 days. In Snohomish, I believe you have to go personally for the final papers, so your wife could be reluctant and back out
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/23 07:58 PM
2

In WA state, both prenups and post-nups are a waste of time. The problem is that WA is community property and any clause in a pre-nup that deviates from 50-50 split is subject to dispute. However both WA and CA have legal separation with cohabitation, so advice to kids would be to file for legal separation a day after marriage
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 09:20 PM
1

Think you had posted here previously, but my advice in WA state King County is to get two signatures on a legal separation form from your wife and file online with option to 'keep assets under your control as separate'. If you file online, jointly and say you don't need to be notified of court decision, it takes only two online filings to get a legal separation. Once you have a legal separation, its permanent and binding for a future divorce in WA state. The advantage you have is the asset split…
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 09:05 PM
1

You can try this in addition to the sabbatical and zero income I suggested. Make it clear to the judge you intend to fight tooth and nail and they will have to take it from you (vs you paying voluntarily).
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 07:29 PM
1

If a doctor quits and takes up pizza delivery, yes, if you quit your $200K corporate job then no, there needs to be evidence of lowering your skill level AND pay
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 06:54 PM
1

I have never seen this type of imputation where payer is asked to pay more than current earning based on history. Nearly all imputation is done when pay history is not available or to reduce payment However this opinion seems to be prevalent on reddit
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 06:26 PM
1

That is more red tape to create a pre-nup, monitor 50-50 custody, policing judges etc. More red tape = larger beast which needs feeding which is how we got here in the first place
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 05:21 PM
1

The marriage certificate is the worst financial contract on earth for men. You have no upside to it, have a ceremony, co-habit, call yourself married, but DO NOT sign the certificate. Once you sign, remember you are dealing with government agencies that don't operate according to the constitution. For example a Judge has complete discretion to throw out a prenup, this is flatly unconstitutional outside family court. Similarly she can lie and make false charges against you without providing any p…
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 05:00 PM
2

If I had 6 years to prepare I would ensure a 100-0 asset split, no alimony and no CS. I hope you have done some basic planning in all these years
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 04:56 PM
1

Pre-nups are a very bad idea because 1) They ask you to list out your assets and provide this info in case of dispute, once you do that all kinds of claims can be made 2) Wife can always claim pressure to sign or failure to understand Much better to go back to what was deemed constitutionally correct, i.e. keep asset under your control as separate property
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 04:52 PM
0

The no fault option should be there, just that no fault should imply court treats couple as never married during divorce
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 03:59 PM
1

Just go back to recognizing separate property based on control of asset, i.e. if a bank account is in your name its separate property. No alimony or CS if wife earns more than poverty limit
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 03:53 PM
0

Usual advice, take sabbatical from job and say you have zero current income
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 03:49 PM
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