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RubenAndJavi Archive

View 8 posts and 48 comments by RubenAndJavi on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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-20

Hey man, the conclusion of the post is that, indeed, you shouldn't act like Fuckboy. "And the Latino culture comment? That’s a stretch." Ngl, your comment reads like slop. I hear that your experience in the dancing community is different to mine - let's agree to disagree.
/r/seduction17/02/26 02:48 PM
3

Your problem is almost surely related to the fact that you don't sexually flirt. Most women won't be rationally and consciously willing to hookup, it's more like they get horny with a guy they find attractive and they just do it. Since you get dates, you're probably attractive, now you only need to get them horny.
/r/seduction22/01/26 09:59 AM
4

Thanks for your comment. You are making some assumptions, and my post was me thinking out loud, so fair enough :) I don't approach indirectly, tell myself I'm only being social, etc. I see social approaches as a way of warming up and getting experience at talking to strangers. They are beneficial for approaches to women who I wanna F, they aren't the main goal by any means. What I mean by it becoming part of your identity is that you start thinking of yourself as the kind of guy who is confident…
/r/seduction21/01/26 03:54 PM
1

I think it depends more on the woman in question than on the stage I was in. In all stages there were women who treated me with empathy and care, and others who treated me with vanity and cruelty. With that being said, the average treatment basically coincided with my level of attractiveness. So as you can imagine: quite badly as a child, normally as a teenager, quite well as a college student, normally as a young worker, and quite well now.
/r/seduction25/09/25 06:03 PM
1

I see why you'd think that, but that's not the metric I use. My best friend receives about as much interest from women as I do. But we live in Spain, full of brunettes, which is his type, whereas my type are northern women. So he has much more sex than me, simply because there are more women who he finds attractive. When we travel to Scandinavia, the opposite is true. I often get hit on by women he'd have sex with, but I don't find them attractive. I should definitely move to the north of Europe…
/r/seduction25/09/25 05:29 PM
2

Here is my current routine: - Shampoo: H&S - Conditioner/Mask: Shea Moisture Intensive Hydration Hair Masque (I use it about once per week) - Leave-In Conditioner: As I Am Classic Leave-in Conditioner (always after towel drying) - Styling: Suavecito Pomade Original Hold (after the leave-in conditioner) Bear in mind I got this routine after experimenting with dozens of products. Sure, try it out, but I recommend trying other products to find out what exactly works for your hair.
/r/seduction25/09/25 05:21 PM
8

Definitely agree with that. Visible Competence + Visible Power = Status And status makes you attractive as fuck. This became clear to me when learning bachata. At first I sucked, so many people treated me dismissively, and most women weren't interested. As I progressed, the dynamic shifted completely: now beginners look up to me (including women), and the intermediates treat me as an equal. At this stage, I have a fair chance with 90% of female dancers.
/r/seduction25/09/25 02:49 PM
0

I have thick, dry, wavy hair. I didn't know how to work with it, so I kept it short and basic. Plus, it had started to thin, you could see my scalp when the light hit directly. I went to a derm and got a prescription to stop my alopecia. Unfortunately, I can't say the name of the drug due to European regulation, but it's a 5-alpha-reductase inhibitor. This alone gave my hair more density, and now it doesn't look like I'm going bald soon. Also, I experimented a lot with different haircuts and hai…
/r/seduction25/09/25 02:40 PM
5

I'm not a native English speaker, so I do use Claude for finding typos. But 99% of the words in this post are written by me. Check my comments on other people's posts, this is my writing style.
/r/seduction25/09/25 01:56 PM
3

It took me about 6 months of daily practice to become an intermediate. At that point you can dance with all girls regardless of their level, and it will be somewhat enjoyable for most of them. If you keep improving you'll start having status in your dancing community, maybe even an instagram following based on dancing.
/r/seduction25/09/25 01:15 PM
1

It all depends on the time and place. If you go up to a sober woman at the beginning of the night and try to kiss her right away, 99 out of 100 times you're gonna be rejected. Do the same thing at the peak of the night and your success rate will be much higher, particularly if you're immersed in the experience, meaning you are acting with absolute conviction and no hesitation. Same thing with inviting her home. If you meet her when she's still inhibited, you'll need to take your time, connect wi…
/r/seduction16/09/25 02:40 PM
1

Don't go to the date with the intention of making a good impression and getting a second date. Sure, be engaging, fun, try to connect with her. But your main intention should be finding out whether you find her attractive on a personal level. This will prevent you from spending time with someone you don't really like, and shift the frame in your favor.
/r/seduction15/09/25 05:35 PM
3

If you have a 6 figure job, you are perfectly capable of fixing your hairline. Go to a derm specialized in hair loss, get some meds to stop the progression, and consider getting a hair transplant. Sure, your self-esteem and confidence is much more than your looks, but why not improve them if you have the resources?
/r/seduction15/09/25 10:11 AM
26

What countries will you be visiting? The dating cultures differ tremendously
/r/seduction09/09/25 03:16 PM
3

This is a complex situation. She might be interested in something casual. If she is, setting up a date-like plan, such as going for drinks at night, and being flirty (playful eye contact, touching her lightly in the arm now and then, bringing up sexual topics) should help you escalate sexually. But she might just be hungry for attention, favours, and money. Unfortunately, there are some women like that out there. So it's very important that you don't invite her to plans that could convey that yo…
/r/seduction02/09/25 11:50 AM
1

This depends a lot on your preferences. Have you had relationships in the past with girls who you didn't think were pretty? How did they go? For most men it wouldn't be a good idea. In the long-term they would struggle to stay loyal, especially if other physically attractive girls take a liking on them. The body wants what it wants.
/r/seduction02/09/25 11:42 AM
6

This will be highly dependent or where you live. In my area, the only people who go to bars on weekdays are groups of friends, and it's not socially accepted to approach them. If you try, 9 out of 10 times, they'll be like "who's this weirdo". But maybe in your area it's not like that, and bars are full of small groups of people who are open to talking to strangers. Given my situation, I go to bachata social dances during the weekdays. It's a great way to meet women (and men) organically. Also, …
/r/seduction01/09/25 03:03 PM
1

how's dating in malta?
/r/seduction28/08/25 11:31 AM
2

Are you sure you want to ask her out? By what you're describing, it seems like you two have different frames. She's behaving like she's the price and you're the pursuer, and you don't want to follow that narrative (understandably so). You might get her to change her attitude, but it would be easier to find someone more compatible.
/r/seduction28/08/25 11:25 AM
129

I've had it several times, mostly through dating apps, sometimes at bars or clubs. Dating apps: we hit it off really well, I escalate sexually and she's down. Mostly happened with women who were visiting my city for a few days. Bars/Clubs: I manage to approach her in an organic way, we connect, she's clearly attracted, and her friends aren't cockblocking (which happens like 70% of the time). This is a bit sad, but it's the truth: I've never had a first day hookup without alcohol involved. And ha…
/r/seduction27/08/25 12:39 PM
20

It is the reality of dating. And it will probably always be that way. There will be women who, for whatever reason, don't click with your personality. You'll meet many avoidants. Some women are going through hard times and aren't emotionally or sexually available. Some women are outright weird. For example, I had been seeing this girl for a few months, and one night she told me the only reason she had been attracted to me in the first place was the shape of my nose. So yes, what you're describin…
/r/seduction26/08/25 09:21 AM
14

High intensity, low exposure. You don't want to talk to her for hours. You want your interactions to be intense. Use your piercing attention, empathy and humor on her, and then have your attention suddenly get caught on something else. Attraction grows in distance.
/r/seduction22/08/25 11:40 AM
11

What I would 100% do is throw an anecdotal comment. Something like "Excuse me, can you pass me the [whatever]?". Then chit chat for 1 minute and ask for his name. I wouldn't take it much further than that on the first day. I'd assess his reaction and remember his name. From then on, next day he goes to the water cooler, you can say "Hey X, how are you?". Even if you only chitchat for 1-2 minutes the first few days, as time goes on you'll feel more comfortable taking longer conversations.
/r/seduction21/08/25 02:58 PM
1

"Hey B, I noticed your mom goes to dancing classes but you don't, how come? You have great dancing genes, it would be a sin not to put them to use! Come on let's dance one song together, don't worry I'll teach you, it will be fun."
/r/seduction21/08/25 02:54 PM
6

Truth is, if you don't have a system in your life that helps you meet women, it doesn't matter so much how attractive you are. I have the impression this is the bottleneck in your dating life. Which makes complete sense, since your job is in a male-dominated industry and your main hobby is (as I understand) something you do by yourself. Using dating apps was a good instinct. But I'd recommend you don't stop there. If you don't like going out at night and are too scared to cold approach, social c…
/r/seduction20/08/25 12:27 PM
9

Exactly. Also, you'll filter people based on your attitude. If you think women who sleep around are sluts, the ones who do will not enjoy being in your presence. Only the prudes will. That reinforces your belief, because the sexually liberal women are rejecting you more often, which makes you condemn them even more harshly, and praise prudes more intensely. This self-reinforcing cycle can be really insidious.
/r/seduction20/08/25 12:19 PM
1

I recommend a hobby, like rock climbing, dancing, or something similar. It's much easier to form connections when you have something in common from the start.
/r/seduction18/08/25 10:35 AM
3

I'm wondering: do you participate in some sort of social activity where there are women involved? I would recommend looking for one that works for you. The questions that you are asking seem, in my opinion, more related to engaging with people in a fun way than in seduction. And joining a social activity would be a great way to practice that. And if you want a guide to speed you up on the process in a non-PUA way, I recommend Charisma on Command, their books or courses are chef's kiss
/r/seduction15/08/25 03:12 PM
7

Touching is probably the best thing you can do here. Start lightly touching her in the outer part of the arm, potentially move to more intimate areas like the waist as the vibe escalates. From what you're saying, I get the impression that you're the type of guy who isn't very socially aware. I'm actually a bit like that too. But since I simply noted in my mind touching = flirting, I started to notice it in other people's interactions. I recommend looking at those with a learning frame of mind. I…
/r/seduction14/08/25 07:48 PM
4

You really want to avoid drawing conclusions such as "I'm unlovable". My recommendation is that you try to picture how your most confident friend would have interpreted the situation. The fact that he (most likely) would have drawn a radically different conclusion shows that the interpretation of this situation is subjective. With that in mind, here's my recommendation on how to interpret it: I'm not there yet. Connecting with women is a learnable skill. Start paying attention to the smaller ski…
/r/seduction20/07/25 01:02 PM
13

I'm also a tech dude with Math education. My view regarding money is the following: - If you have it, it's a small plus. Most women will be more attracted if you have a good career and lifestyle. But it's hardly ever a trigger of attraction. Only for gold-diggers, who you probably want to avoid. - If you don't have it, it's a big disadvantage. If a woman has the impression that she's richer than you, generally she'll be turned off. So, kind of like looks, having money makes things easier. But it…
/r/seduction18/07/25 10:46 AM
1

- Are you getting enough dates to be satisfied with your romantic life? - Are you starting to bump into the women you've previously approached? Is it affecting your reputation? If both are negative, then it's not too much
/r/seduction15/07/25 10:14 AM
6

The topics are less relevant than the intentions. You can ask her about her life dreams, listen to her tell you about them, and say "Hmm, yes, very interesting. So what did you study?". Here, the intention is to get the other person talking and avoid silence. You can also ask her what she had for lunch today and turn that into a fun, value-driven conversation. The key is that your intentions are focused on learning about her values and having fun with her. Intentions >>> Topics
/r/seduction14/07/25 11:43 AM
13

Here are some of my favorites - The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem: 8/10. This is an extremely good source of knowledge regarding self-esteem. This topic will definitely permeate all your relationships. Having high self-esteem will naturally induce you to act high-status. And not having it will have the opposite consequence. - The Value of Others: 8/10. This book poses a lot of good questions regarding relationships. While there's a lot of bullshit, and the author consistently uses analogies to just…
/r/seduction13/07/25 02:00 PM
1

The funny guy is having fun himself and has no hidden agenda. The entertainer is performing to get something from others.
/r/seduction12/07/25 11:39 AM
17

Dancing bachata was a before and after in my life. Now, when I meet a girl at a club, I always invite her to dance. It's kind of crazy because, while dancing bachata (or salsa, for that matter) is a learnable skill like any other, non-dancers or beginners tend to think that "I'm just great at dancing". While I don't try to suggest that this is the case, I know that this bias helps me with women. And honestly they tend to love it. There's a reason women go to dancing classes, even if pretty much …
/r/seduction11/07/25 01:56 PM
2

Makes a lot of sense. In my opinion, dating is a sales funnel. In order to meet a woman, you need a set of skills. To get her initially attracted, another. To escalate, another. To have sex, keep her as a LTR, other skillsets. You can be really good at the top of your funnel, but simply lack the skills to lock her down. To get her in a LTR you probably need: - A deep emotional connection with her - A lifestyle she wants to be a part of - (Optional but very effective) Really good sex
/r/seduction11/07/25 10:48 AM
1

I'm Spanish and I live in Spain, so I might be able to give some pointers. But first of all, do you or your friend speak Spanish fluently?
/r/seduction10/07/25 06:40 PM
1

I would recommend the following: First of all, prepare a few possible flirty/funny lines that you can use to deliver your profession. Such as "I'm a doctor, actually. I specialize on broken hearts. Broken a few myself, so I'm kind of an expert." This one isn't really funny, but you get what I'm saying. Play a comic situation where you are doing something cool and admired by the ladies. I recommend preparing and memorizing at least 3 answers like this. Then practice at saying them with a playful …
/r/seduction10/07/25 06:36 PM
8

Approaching is awkward at first. You're kind of breaking social rules, so if you're a bit shy, you get in fight-or-flight mode. How do you remove the nerves? Exposure therapy. That doesn't mean going to the main street of your city in a chicken costume and approaching 100 girls per day. It means that, on a given month, you're increasing your approaches compared to the last one. You try to say the first sentence. And when you've done it a couple times, you try to reply to them (like you suggested…
/r/seduction10/07/25 06:15 PM
66

I used to live in Brussels, which is a melting pot, so I've met a ton of European and American women. Trying to categorize European women in general is absolutely impossible. The dating cultures of, say, Italy and Sweden are extremely different. American women are, in my experience, more attracted to money and a good career than most European women (with the obvious exception of eastern Europeans). They are also much more sexually open (with the exception of Scandinavians). For the record, 90% o…
/r/seduction10/07/25 06:06 PM
2

My choice is Copenhagen. Actually, pretty much anywhere you go in Scandinavia, women look amazing. The men look quite good too, so get ready for strong competition. But if you dress well, are well groomed, and have good game (scandis tend to be very shy unless they are completely drunk) you'll have a good chance.
/r/seduction10/07/25 06:00 PM
5

Dude, the amount of good-looking guys in Oslo isn't by any means representative of the rest of the world. You guys have god-like genetics.
/r/seduction10/07/25 01:44 PM
1

I'm 6 foot and my lay count is about 15. But to avoid anecdotal/fake conclusions, I'd recommend looking for scientific studies on the topic. If you can't find them let me know and I'll try to look for some.
/r/seduction10/07/25 11:59 AM
1

Of course it will affect your dating life. Now, will it make it significantly worse than if you were, say, 6 foot? No, I don't think so.
/r/seduction10/07/25 11:47 AM
5

Hmm, interesting that you say that if you have one you don't need the other. I know lots of good-looking guys who aren't at all satisfied with their dating lives. Same thing (but to a lesser degree) with guys who have game.
/r/seduction10/07/25 11:17 AM
2

I would recommend to try salsa/bachata classes. Now, I don't recommend you to just hit on the salsa/bachata girls directly. At first, you won't be a good dancer, they will probably dance better than you, so your probabilities of seducing them are slim. And this is a hobby where you'll see the same people again and again, so it won't help to develop a reputation of being "that guy". Go to the classes, become good at dancing, and then you'll find that with some girls there's natural chemistry. My …
/r/seduction10/07/25 09:38 AM
3

Thanks for the recommendation man, I'll check him out
/r/seduction07/07/25 05:52 AM
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