Sad-Biscotti-6608 Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
3	First time meeting with ex wife after 2 of divorce Post an update and let us know how it goes. I am curious.	/r/Divorce_Men	13/12/21 09:30 AM
2	She showed up to my front door 4 months after separating Agreed. I wish I had the self respect to call it quits during separation and not allow her to string me along until she built her separate life. If I was OP, I'd tell her to pay me rent or better yet, move out.	/r/Divorce_Men	09/12/21 08:34 PM
16	I keep ideallizing my marriage and STBX as something it never really was. You are grieving the death of a dream, as opposed to the loss of that specific person. It is very hard to come to terms with, and will take you a long time. One thing that helped me was that I asked myself: If I met this person today and we had no prior history together, would I be interested in dating her? My answer is...no.	/r/Divorce_Men	11/10/21 02:51 PM
6	Is marriage worth it? Probably not. If I do, prenuptial, separate finances, and her name will not be on any of my assets.	/r/Divorce_Men	18/09/21 07:09 PM
1	The worst comes out In the long run, I learned to appreciate my ex's emotionally manipulative tactics and abuse after separation because it made me realize how she been doing that to me for majority of our relationship. Unfortunately for her, those tactics were no longer effective because I had nothing to lose anymore. This made moving on much easier for me.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/05/21 12:28 PM
1	Why so much value Sounds like you're still early in your healing process. That's okay because everybody does it at their own pace. I had the same feelings about my ex despite the fact that she also did the same things: cheated, gaslit, lied, etc. I would always remind myself of the bad times to knock her off the pedestal that I created for her in my head. At first it didn't work but slowly over time it began to. Then as I was forced to interact with her throughout the divorce and separation process, she continued…	/r/Divorce_Men	26/05/21 12:24 PM
2	What’s the dating pool like for a man in his mid 30s? I can't speak to where you live, but i am in my mid 30s and on the East Coast in a populated area. Similar attributes to offer as you. The dating pool is awesome. Women as young as early twenties are interested (too immature for my taste but the confidence boost is nice). No one even cares that you're divorced. I actually think it's attractive to some women, although I can't say why, I would guess that it's because you know a thing or two about avoiding the pitfalls of bad relationships. I spoke…	/r/Divorce_Men	26/05/21 12:14 PM
1	Looking for any feedback from any guys in here who might have divorced and are federal employees I'm trying to figure out retirement benefits FERS and TSP Hi there. Federal employee also going through the divorce process. My STBXW is also a fed. We initially decided to just keep our own retirements. However I had a contingency built in our separation agreement that would allow me to pay her part of my TSP to cash her out for some of the equity I owe her in the house to permit me to keep it. My understanding is that we have to get a lawyer to draft a qualified Domestic Relations order for us. And a judge to sign off on it. That gets sent to OPM, th…	/r/Divorce_Men	09/04/21 08:31 PM
1	STBX Behavioral Changes Get off social media or at least block her off everything. I did it and haven't looked back.	/r/Divorce_Men	08/04/21 04:40 PM
2	Any advice I can only speak to my experience. Similar situation: She cheated. Then needed to take "emotional space" to "find herself" and "figure things out", which in more direct terms meant we needed to live apart. We tried that for a few months, and she suggested we find more permeant living arrangements apart from one another to give her more time to "figure herself out" and "work on herself". It was all nonsense. She was slow rolling the breakup to provide herself time to work out the logistics. If so…	/r/Divorce_Men	26/02/21 03:49 PM
1	Need to stop going over to the ex’s Cut ties for your own emotional protection. It's about you now - do what is best for you and don't look back.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/02/21 03:16 PM
8	Do you think your wife planned your divorce & set you up like me? Totally man. It occurred incrementally over a year or more. She dropped lots of hints, namely trying to convince me to leave and setting the ground work for her to leave. Lots of lies. Lots of manipulation. Lots of gaslighting.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/02/21 03:14 PM
1	Feeling extremely conflicted OP - I can relate, and I definitely feel for you. I am going to briefly share my story, because I am hoping it will help you to see that it gets better over time. My SBTXW separated from me in late August of last year because she wanted emotional space to process our relationship. At the time, she made this sound like it would only last a few weeks. She started to become more direct about her emotions and feelings after separation. She accused me of emotional abuse, manipulation, gaslighting, an…	/r/Divorce_Men	19/01/21 03:01 PM
1	To my ex who still wants to be friends Thank you for this. I felt very conflicted receiving a Merry Christmas from my ex. That was our first Christmas apart and we spent the past ten together. She just told me she wanted a divorce in November. I felt angry receiving it, and felt like a bad person for feeling angry. And then I was very conflicted about how to respond. This helps me to make sense of my emotions. Thanks again.	/r/Divorce_Men	16/01/21 11:59 PM