TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

Startingthisover Archive

View 5 posts and 73 comments by Startingthisover on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

You were in a terrible marriage. And after being away for awhile you will realize it. You two were just business associates.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/26 07:51 AM
1

Same with mine
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 05:26 PM
1

I feel this.
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 05:18 PM
1

Leave. I am in same boat
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 05:16 PM
1

And remember joint custody is not “physical joint custody”. That is true 50/50.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/25 08:00 PM
2

Just don't waste your time and money on stories and extras that the attorney doesn't need. Tell them exactly what you want and remember they are not your therapist and don't care about all the extra drama. Will save you a TON of money in the long run.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/25 10:30 AM
1

Let her know you will still be friends and hopefully she doesn’t turn this calm into crazy once she has time to process.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/25 10:30 AM
1

It sucks for sure.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/25 09:02 AM
1

Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/25 09:02 AM
6

Man I hope I feel this good too. I am on the door step with one foot out ready to leave. Glad to hear you are crushing life!
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/25 01:47 AM
1

Glad it is helping.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/25 02:04 AM
2

It’s happening so lock in and focus on the task at hand. You got this.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/25 12:24 AM
3

Sounds weird but do you think all the therapy is just keeping it at the forefront of your mind all the time?
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/25 12:20 AM
2

30-50k… a month… for life. That is what I am looking at when it’s done.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/25 12:17 AM
8

Take pics in front of your Lamborghini
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/25 07:10 PM
1

lol
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/25 07:08 PM
6

Good rule is take your age / 1/2 and add 7 years. So 50 / 2 + 7 =32 😎
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/25 03:11 AM
1

Correct. They have no way of knowing.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/25 03:06 AM
2

Couldn’t you just say you have been separated for 1 year to speed things up?
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/25 03:55 AM
1

Sounds amazing. My wife would freak out if I even thought about buying a box of cookies because they are bad for you. Why did we ever let them control us so much? Cannot wait for freedom to choose whatever the hell I want to do and without answering to someone all the time.
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/25 09:07 AM
1

When we stopped having fun together. When it just became staring at the TV every day and going to the movies once a week. When my priorities didn’t matter anymore. When only her happiness was what we concentrated on. Still married - but these are my daily thoughts of why to leave.
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/25 02:08 AM
3

If it comes down to custody DO NOT AGREE to join custody. That is every other weekend dad. Get PHYSICAL JOINT CUSTODY. I see so many dads go down for this thinking they got 50/ 50.
/r/Divorce_Men28/11/24 05:04 PM
1

How did you finally get up and leave. I love my wife of 28 treats but we both want different things now. I know it’s time to go but don’t want to break her heart.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/24 08:59 PM
1

I am still here and still feel the same. How do you get the courage to just pack up and go?
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 07:28 PM
1

Freedom!
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/24 12:24 PM
2

Move somewhere amazing like Florida and soak up the sun! Enjoy everyday and make memories and have adventures. Enjoy that new freedom.
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/24 12:21 PM
1

As soon as I walk there will be over $1,000,000 per year in alimony. Hence another reason I have not yet.
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 04:31 PM
0

Honestly the only thing that has ever held me back is breaking her heart. I keep choosing her happiness over mine because I cannot stand the thought of her being sad with me leaving.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 11:51 PM
2

That is EXACTLY how I feel. Like a prisoner in my own home. Work my butt off all week, to only look forward to eating out once and going to the movies. WTF -this is not living and not what I signed up for. Now I am depressed all the time, tired. Lethargic, everything is gray and getting worse. I feel I have to leave for my own sanity.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 02:53 PM
3

Great advice, I appreciate it.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 02:49 PM
1

Good advice, thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 02:48 PM
1

Appreciate it, good advice. Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 02:47 PM
2

Thank you brother. Good thing is I am financially sound which is usually the hardest part. I can easily buy / lease a new home and set it up right away with new furniture etc.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 12:18 PM
2

We have discussed it for years. She won’t budge and it’s not a blindside since she knows how I feel. Not abandoning her since I will be financially taking care of her the rest of her life and would be here for anything she needs. Her alimony right now will be over $1,000,000 per year at 30% for life. She also has a huge support group here with friends, family, church, etc. I am leaving her a million dollar home paid off and a $100,000 car paid off. A lot of partners are not trying to help when t…
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 12:14 PM
2

Glad it worked out and than you for responding. Felt like I was on an island.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 12:10 PM
1

Glad I am not alone feeling like this - THANK YOU! How did you finally manage the courage to just do it?
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 10:26 AM
13

Dump her and be done with that nightmare.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/24 02:31 AM
1

Great advice and you could be right. Might just be a temporary band-aid to the situation. Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/24 03:40 AM
1

I make 7 figures she will already get a ton no matter what.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 03:05 AM
2

Keep up the good fight! I am doing ok. I ended up staying and buying a big ass house and new car. Still struggle with the thoughts of being on my own and living a more adventurous life outside of my home. Most days feels like a prison just going out once a week to the movies and out to eat. My wife is a HUGE introvert now and doesn’t ever want to do anything. some days I just want to tell her to keep the new house and the car, pay her an ass load of money in support per month and go live my own …
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 02:09 AM
1

Just checking in to see how the battle is going and if / when it is going to be over and how you are doing now.
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/24 06:40 PM
1

Dump her. She doesn't have to be in the "mood" for maintenance sex to make sure your needs are taken care of. She is selfish. Show her the door.
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/24 06:29 PM
1

Time to get a 2nd job, a hobby that pays, start a new business. Do something to earn more.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/23 02:18 PM
2

And I caved - for the 2nd time now. Thanks for listening.
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/23 12:35 AM
2

Been yelled at and guilt tripped for hours now. Might just call an Uber and leave tomorrow to get the hell out of this house early. Don't want to deal with this for a full day tomorrow and then the morning I leave. Anyone else ever dealt with this? How did you handle it?
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/23 10:37 PM
2

I can feel myself slipping and want to give in and just stay because it's easy. This is sooooo hard.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/23 07:32 PM
2

Still staying strong and have 2 more days before I leave Thursday. I have been living in these discussions trying to keep myself focused on what I need to do. Have to get through today and then pack everything tomorrow. I already know tomorrow is going to be the hardest while I am packing and getting everything ready. I might try to spend some time out of the house so my wife doesn’t attack me all day about leaving. Thank you community for being here.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/23 10:58 AM
1

Married 27 years.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/23 02:51 AM
2

Thanks for sharing. So glad I am not alone out here. Love this community.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/23 02:49 AM
1

I feel the same way and have been married for 27 years. I am the one deciding to leave because my wife has become such an introvert that we don't even leave the house anymore. She is my best friend and I will financially take care of her the rest of our lives and I am fine with that. I don't have all the my wife cheated on me stories that make it sound easier to leave. I just want a different life, and we have moved apart in that aspect. If we stayed forever while we were unhappy for another 30 …
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/23 07:03 PM
2

Still going through with it, and the countdown has begun. I leave Thursday. Have 3 more days to stay strong. Thank God foe this message board to keep me strong.
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/23 06:34 PM
1

Sorry to hear about the prolonged fight. Congrats on the new gf!
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/23 11:44 PM
1

I just said she won't go anywhere. I could just leave now and be done with it and pay her a ton of money so she never worries financially again. Need to just get a place on the side, tell her one day before I leave. Made the mistake of telling her several days before I planned on moving out. Had a house leased, moving truck rented, everything in my name and it was out of state. She talked me out of it.
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/23 06:03 PM
3

Married 27 years and I am 50. Tried to leave and get a divorce but my wife begged me to stay and I folded. That was 7 months ago and I still want to go. I feel the same about what is my life all about right now. Just feeling trapped in a miserable boring life with my overly introvert wife who doesn't want to do anything.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 10:02 PM
2

How did you get out of the spousal support so cheap? Typically it’s 30 percent. I am going through the motions but I make millions and spousal support is going to be huge.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/23 08:35 PM
3

Enjoy the freedom. Go out with friends. Go to the movies, go on long drives, and enjoy the peace and quiet.
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/23 02:18 PM
1

Wife and I talked about it and I am going to stay. I am in a terrible depression from all of this and not sure how it will all work out. Thank you all for the support and words of wisdom. I appreciate all of you. If something changes I will let you all know.
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/23 01:30 PM
4

Divorce is the only option. Everyone here has said it and they are right. She got caught is I my reason she is now being nice again.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/23 10:48 AM
1

You think never leaving the house, never going out with friends, never going out to lunch or dinner, having any kind of social life at all is minimal and selfish? You think the only reason for divorce is lack of sex or someone is cheating? How about mental anguish by being stuck in your house all day everyday. Some of these comments are really thoughtless.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/23 10:16 AM
0

I haven’t drank in over a year. So the whole alcoholic thing is out the window. When we drank before it would be for a couple of hours in the middle of the day on Saturday only with lunch. Never during the week, never after work etc. my wife just was never a drinker so she hated to “wait around for me to have a couple of beers” as she would say. Funny how she couldn’t give me 2 hours a week to hang out and relax but I give her all day everyday and watch shows and movies with her all night.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/23 10:12 AM
1

This is exactly how I feel! My wife is doing the same thing and I feel like a prisoner in my own home.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/23 01:47 AM
1

We talked before the move. I told her 100% I didn’t want to move. It was an all or nothing thing and I didn’t want her to have to move etc by herself. Now here we are.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/23 01:07 AM
2

I would like to concentrate on myself. Workout, ride my bike in the sun again everyday before work, swim in the pool after work and have a cold beer, go out to a nice dinner and relax before the next workday begins. On the weekends hang out with some friends, go see a movie, have some drinks, go out and see the world. I have been tied down for so long and it was always to take care of my family and my wife. I forgot to live a life for myself during it all. Now that my wife just wants to sit in t…
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/23 01:03 AM
2

Alimony will be around $40,000 per month at 30%. I am good with that and won’t make a dent in my lifestyle. The money is not the issue.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/23 12:59 AM
2

Thank you I appreciate the feedback. I think this has been a long time coming for me. She stopped wanting to go out or have fun for around 1.5-2 years now. Then we moved and that was what has broken me down. We used to ride our bikes everyday in the Sun and go out to lunches on the weekends. Now we just sit and do nothing - ever. I know I would be 100x happier alone and not worried about dating at all. I would never get married again and would takes years to even think about a relationship again…
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/23 12:55 AM
2

I told her tonight that I was leaving. Took me 20 mins to locate a new home and I bought another car online which will be here in a week (we only had one since I work from home). Reality is setting in for her. She is telling me not to go and now the compromise is we can go out anytime I want but no drinks. I am not sure what this new hang up with drinks is. I feel like if I still stay she will revert back to her introvert self again and I will be either alone going out or stuck in the house agai…
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/23 12:46 AM
2

Thank you I appreciate it. Alimony will be crazy high because I make over 7 figures a year but at this point I don't care about the money. None of the costs concern me at all.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/23 02:05 PM
7

The fact we cannot leave to go get coffee or a bagel or a lunch on a Tuesday for example is driving me nuts. I feel trapped at home with no outlet. She will go to church on Sunday but nothing else. Or lunch on Saturday. Everything else is out.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/23 01:56 PM
2

I was afraid someone would say that. I don't want to see her face when she knows it is over. I love her dearly but I cannot stand this miserable boring life anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/23 01:45 PM
8

I have told exactly what I wanted and she refuses to change. It is all or nothing with her. Friends of hers have even tried to talk to her about it and she refuses.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/23 01:34 PM
10

She had always been an introvert but we still went out once a week to hang out in town and have food and drinks. Then she just over ight said we are not going out anymore. She does not work and doesn't need to with my income. She wanted to move here to be closer to our son. We have seen him twice in the 5 months we have lived here. No reason to live here for that. We could fly to see him that much or have him come to us on vacations. Parallel living is out because she would freak out every time …
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/23 01:33 PM
2

I hear this. Just feel guilty for the way I feel. Like I am being selfish.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/23 01:28 PM
5

Not worried about the permanent alimony. If we lived together I would still be paying for everything anyways.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/23 01:28 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter