TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

Tell-Me-Whyy Archive

View 0 posts and 195 comments by Tell-Me-Whyy on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
19

Gosh how dare she do that to the hardcore feminist name! Pickme under the cloak of feminism 😒😒😒
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 04:43 PM
78

I think the whole women choosing to sleep with lots of men was portrayed as 'empowering' because for once women could choose to have sex for their own pleasure and choice, not just because men want to, or for men's pleasure, or men's choice. There's the whole bullshit of if a man sleeps with lots of women it's seen as an 'accomplishment' yet women who sleep with lots of men are seen as 'easy' 'sluts' 'hoes' 'whores' and no longer viable to date. So hoping to demonstrate that women enjoying sex d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 02:48 PM
43

Yeah imagine if women stopped doing porn and trying to get male validation as well, don't think they'd act with sanity
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 09:52 AM
45

Yeah I remember my ex telling me (months after we went out) for years he had said he didn't want to date a feminist or a psychologist. Because apparently a psychologist could read his mind (I don't like this wrong assumption about psychology) but he did admit I could read his mind pretty well. Which isn't good for those manipulative jerks as you said.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 02:17 PM
41

The first and only two boys I dated, both took me on walk dates, where both of them tried to get me to give them a hand job or blow job. The funny thing is, scrote no2 criticised scrote no1 for what he did and and what I did, as well as scrote no2's friends gossiping and bitching. I was 'naive and desperate' and 'illogical to let someone into my inner circle' and scrote no1 'seeks out vulnerability and exploits people' and 'lacks human traits like empathy' Then SCROTE NO2 DID THE EXACT SAME THIN…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 12:20 PM
17

Yup, me too
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 08:55 AM
26

I cannot understand how anyone would want to choke or be choked for sexual gratification. Oh wait, I know, porn! Before porn how many women would say ooh I really want to be strangled and potentially die because that really turns me on? I remember telling my ex, never touch my neck, I have a fear of being strangled, thankfully he never did and never suggested anything.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 08:53 AM
174

I always cringed seeing my ex with other people because it just looked like a complete act / performance / persona. (He was narcissistic). And he would ignore me when we were around anyone else. If birds of a feather flock together, does it mean a hvm will have HVM friends too? Or are HVM so rare that that's not possible?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 10:00 AM
2

I love this song! I think it's pretty good from a 17 year old as well :) I'm sorry I don't really have any advic, but I wish you the best in your personal journey
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 05:30 AM
132

Oh I remember a similar study (or maybe a different part of the same one?) that replaced rape by basically describing it with different words, and asked men if they would [rape] and quite a lot said yes :/
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 08:46 PM
25

How about blaming MEN for their actions, for raping harassing assaulting women, so that we have to be careful and cautious etc, rather than women?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 07:36 PM
25

Yup this exactly. If they COULD they would be having sex with a different lady every time they got horny, but they cannot, and cba to put in any effort so just watch porn. My ex said he wasn't into the whole ons at the beginning of the relationship but then I realised he wouldn't be able to pull because he's attractive mostly due to his narcissistic charm, and my uni is notoriously sporty, more boys than women, and there's a lot of attractive guys there, a lot of women already had attractive bfs…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 06:00 PM
78

We wish!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 08:33 AM
60

We know what his priorities are :/
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 10:27 PM
182

Ughhh he's a gamer too, and a cheat. Great husband 👍 bet he does nothing in the house, for his wife or with his children. Poor lady.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 10:02 PM
56

They've done studies already but it's a bit :///// to see that guys would automatically have sex with a woman they've seen for like 10 secs who just cold approached them. Women could never do that because of potential dangers, and most women just wouldn't do that. 😒😒😒
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 05:40 PM
46

Exactly, technically the opposite of arrogance is being humility / being humble. Arrogance isn't attractive, but as you said there is a healthy confident middle which is where we should all aim to be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 08:18 PM
225

Omg .... blatant gaslighting. Sick of the 'you're so insecure and crazy and paranoid' bullshit Most women just know when something's off and then they find something legitimately suspicious or bad. Like um? It's right there!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 08:04 PM
70

Men usually have stupidly high standards for their gf yet incredibly low standards for themself. Aka, double standards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 07:57 PM
90

And she put "woman's" day, it should be women's day, and she called herself a girl and I'm guessing she's a woman
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 05:07 PM
96

The thing is that none of these things are in context, thus gives quite an unfair presentation. For example, suicide is an awful thing, and a real problem, but a lot is to do with society and patriarchy. Men don't support their friends in the way that women do. Men don't seek professional or unprofessional help for their problems. White, straight, males technically have life the easiest in the sense they don't understand what it's like to be treated as the marginalized or inferior group, in the …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 02:05 PM
18

Definitely! They tend to be incredibly 'loyal' to each other and accept each other being LV people because it allows themselves to be, and think it's good / normal and won't strive to be better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 12:09 PM
59

Definitely, my ex kept a lot of his friends from school, which is not typical of a narc, but they're not a good bunch, at the very least they're all addicted to computer games and porn and staying up ridiculously late when they have uni, and he seemed way too keen on 'pleasing' them and never saying no to them, yet was the complete opposite with me. So not HV behaviour at all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 10:08 AM
89

They always do that omg why has everything got to be about them! Always minimizing and deflecting When do you ever hear about women leaking men's nudes? Maybe because no one fucking wants an ugly dick pic! Or because men love their ugly penises so much that they will send them to every woman anyway! They're not that vindictive either! Lol so arrogant.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 08:07 PM
31

No so 50 50 now are you guys 😡😡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 07:04 PM
2

I don't think it's empowering, because women should be more than their bodies. Be smart and empower yourself! Work hard and empower yourself. I don't see how showing your flesh which sadly you KNOW men will sexualise and objectify you for. Men don't understand 'it's okay for a woman to sexualise herself but you can't sexualise her,' they will see it as the woman wanting to be sexualised. Ik men will sexualise women regardless of what they wear, but I just don't see the need for women to basicall…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 10:11 PM
44

Should put it into sex education in primary school at 11, and make it mandatory for parents to educate their kids.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 09:14 PM
120

Literally! My ex taught me that I want a guy who doesn't watch porn and doesn't play computer games (or only does very casually, like a hobby should be), but nope, what are guy's favourite things to do? Probably watching porn or ogling women, and playing games 😡 better off investing in having closer women friends.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 09:13 PM
49

If you're not going to give a relationship enough time then don't have one. Even if you work a lot you can still make time for a relationship, or if you feel you cannot then tell someone before they get involved / attached. Probably an excuse too. I remember my ex would always go on about how he needs to do well academically for 'our future' (pah he knew he meant his future), yet he would also conveniently make time to play 30 hours of computer games a week and talk to his friends all of the tim…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 12:00 AM
62

Even then that's pretty vague.... bet that kinda guy will do some shit and turn around and say we were never official or something
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 03:44 PM
190

I remember my ex once said I was a burden to him, even though at that time I was being way too 'pickme' and tolerating his shit, and he was the one who initiated the relationship. I was 'high maintenance' and 'demanding' too, and 'require too much attention'. I couldn't understand how someone can view fun relationship things like going on dates or talking to them regularly and asking about their day or saying goodnight, and a whole person, could be seen as a chore or burden, because I was happy …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 03:12 PM
51

Exactly, if you knew it was gonna be used against you, you would never send it! They can all say he wouldn't do that, but that's what everyone says, yet it still happens! Same as a lot of things tbh, you can think it won't happen to you, but it does happen, so best to be cautious
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 11:52 AM
13

My ex had a ton of girls from our secondary school on his social media, like 100 maybe, he wasn't friends with most of them, and couldn't really give a good reason for having them on fb, I did accuse him of being a fb pervert and he got offended. But he would use innocent selfies I sent him to masturbate, so why not use other women's more provocative selfies like a lot of guys have done so? It's kind of ridiculous they have porn which they love so much or have a girlfriend and still do this. No …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 10:53 AM
13

I'm 5 5 also (which is a good average in the uk), but more so I have a young looking face, and I'm a slim build, if someone would compliment me it's because I'm 'cute' or maybe pretty, rather than 'hot' (I'm 20 and got questioned if I was 16 for example). So now I'm a bit cautious if guys are attracted to me because of some liking young women weird thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 10:49 AM
67

Ugh how one guy was like everyone subconsciously rates people everyday or something. Like NO! You might do asshole, but I do not look at people and judge them and mentally stick a number on them after seeing them for 5 secs. Yeah they should have flipped it definitely.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 08:23 PM
313

I find it funny when people say as an 'insult' no man will want you. Good! I'm glad! I hope the scrotes don't like me and stay away thank you! And it's not even true that they don't want you if you're a proper feminist, and it's not like they're treating the pickmes any better is it. Ah but I do hope all women raise their standards and do not put up with any trash, and that men become better people for everyone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 03:00 PM
20

Damn telling your gf to shave her legs would be pretty bad but telling your gf's sister 😱 the audacity of this guy omg
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 09:40 AM
75

Exactly, men get annoyed about not getting enough compliments so why don't they compliment each other? Oh because they're scared of being accused of 'homo'. Then proceed to take the piss out of women who compliment each other (like on social media posts). They may compliment women more than men compliment women, but they usually give compliments for ulterior motives and are not genuine. As you said, maybe they need to be better people to be deserving of compliments, otherwise they are encouragin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 01:52 PM
15

I think it's so sad that a man treating you with some kindness and respect, ie treating you like a human being, is often applauded, because so many men will literally treat you like shit. Like so many men do not even do bare minimum. It's so unfair how the standards are so low for men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 09:49 AM
5

Definitely when you're in a bad or not very good relationship, it might hurt a bit first of all but in the long term literally everyone says they feel so much better and happier. Well done for leaving and I'm glad you're doing better now without him
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 09:39 AM
25

I pray that one day in the future (if human kind isn't dead) porn shall not exist 🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️ Literally causes SO many problems and has so much wrong with it, and has 0 benefit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 11:58 PM
52

Was literally going to say the same thing! Good for her! Ah I wish I had stuck to my 16 year old gut that said being single and having cats was the dream and 0 boys in sight.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 11:29 PM
29

I used to think because I'm not attractive and dress and behave modestly, I would not have the dilemma of being used or seen as a hole, and guys could sort of write me off romantically / sexually and just be friends. But nope, regardless of what you look like, wear, or how you behave, you will be viewed as a potential hole.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 09:58 PM
12

I hate that women get gaslighted into believing they're insecure and crazy, and they must accept their bf watching porn at looking at naked women all the time while they're meant to be in a monogamous relationship and just love their gf.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 05:37 PM
141

Okay so on that note women should do nothing for men. Why do you want a woman to cook for you when you have hands? Why should a woman look after your kid when you have hands? Why should she clean when you have hands? Why should she have sex with you when you have hands? Yeah wanting a woman to cook and clean and be loyal to a pornsick scrote isn't being a selfish whore but wanting someone to open a door for you is. I thought men boast about being the logical sex?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 11:37 AM
77

'Poorly judged moment' yeah poor dude he should have done it while the camera wasn't on him that's all that's wrong with it bad timing
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 11:26 AM
5

Ugh the comments on youtube 😒
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 12:09 AM
21

Sorry for being dumb but why don't they just end the relationship or tell you what's up with them or you? Like if the woman has already said she is ending the relationship, or wants to end the relationship, or has emotionally & sexually left the relationship then why don't they just say, tell you why? ( I struggled with this a lot with my narcissistic ex)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 06:14 PM
46

I used to sometimes be repulsed by the sort of 'hungry eyes' they give when they're horny or want to have sex, like a sort of intense look into your eyes that's subconscious. Probably the same as the look you mentioned.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 05:44 PM
131

Well they usually treat men better than women so why not
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 02:25 PM
218

Ugh honestly I never want to see or go near a penis again 😭 Due to the knowledge of men and their thoughts and behaviours, I am quite sex repulsed. But yeah there are a lot more potential dangers for a woman than there is for a man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 11:29 AM
73

Most of the time if the girlfriend is 'crazy', I really hate the crazy ex gf trope it is because the guy has driven the poor ex / gf insane with all his lies or gaslighting or abuse or manipulation or shitty treatment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 09:46 AM
39

Yes! At the start of the relationship most people I thought were pretty chill and happy (the honeymoon phase), but there was me worrying and thinking the relationship wasn't going to work out, and why was this? Because he was live bombing me, and obviously things just did not feel right. I was thinking I'm such an abnormal person for not relaxing, but I guess I knew the fall from the pedestal was inevitable. As the relationship progressed I began constantly thinking about him, I was obsessed, I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 09:44 AM
10

Exactly, I don't think baby boys that have just come from their mama have brains 'wired' this way. So much of brain development is due to environmental factors (hence the odd fetal child etc with severely underdeveloped brains)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 11:49 PM
24

And with sewing you're doing something productive (so it would be more justifiable to spend a lot of time on it), it's a useful skill, you can fix or create things! And there's no controversy that sewing is bad for mental health or violence or achieving lower grades in school, messing up your dopamine circuits etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 10:11 PM
61

Definitely, and time is a commodity, people with hobbies only usually spend a few hours a week or a bit more if they're more serious. It's also usually not addictive. If your partner doesn't like your hobby it doesn't matter, bc a hobby is a hobby and not a huge deal. Whereas gaming, people especially boys will play it excessively, equivalent to a job in some cases. That's why I resent some people saying it's 'just a hobby'. Yeah it can be for some people, but for a lot it's expensive and a huge…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 07:16 PM
71

Great point! Any person has the potential to be a drunk driver, the same way as any man has the potential to rape
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 04:42 PM
19

Her youtube videos really help a lot of people. I'm glad she's successful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/20 11:26 PM
7

And it's usually the ones who genuinely are not good enough the shitty humans that can make you feel like you're not good enough.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/20 11:05 PM
21

Agreed, my narcissistic ex said he hardly used fb because he's not into social media, he didn't have me on fb or his relationship status on fb because I had to be on fb (I didn't have it), he also said he didn't have me on there because he just has fb for uni. He also claimed that at uni he had no women friends. Doesn't keep in touch with old women friends from school. Well to me, it seemed suspicious and like a ton of excuses. Finally got fb, all of it was a lie, ton of girls on there, he used …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/20 07:10 PM
31

Disappointing, I saw her saying she was happy self partnered and she also dresses/behaves pretty respectfully so I thought hm she's okay, didn't really know much, but shame :/ Men created patriarchy, ofc it's beneficial for them, and any negatives (like men not supporting men with their mental health or sexuality) are problems they themselves have created and perpetuated.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/20 06:53 PM
17

Yeah Thatcher did some controversial things in the country, but big respect for her strength.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/20 11:03 AM
60

Wait he is nearly 50 and she is 28 and HE lives in HER house?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/20 10:47 AM
22

Exactly, women are like oooh 😍😍🥰🥰 and appreciate a bit of eye candy (quite universally).Yet you get men all over the internet writing disgusting objectifying things about women if they see someone attractive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 09:41 AM
11

It's so hypocritical!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 09:35 AM
172

Well dude if you didn't watch porn you wouldn't have this 'dilemna' would you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 12:29 PM
31

I don't know much about this guy, what's the deal with him?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 09:36 PM
8

I thought science said that crying was a turn off because it lowers aggression etc. There have been studies on it. The guy is .... I mean I don't even have the words for some of the things on reddit
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 12:01 PM
64

Surely they have to be. You can buy mozzarella sticks for like £1/2. You could get paid more for sex than £1/2 ( I don't advocate it but yannoe, those 2 pound mozzarella sticks are really not worth being hidden by your bf and doing and wearing whatever he wants to be degraded). This whole shutting someone up with food is weird. It's like shoving a lollipop at a kid. And a very bad deal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 08:21 AM
17

They just dump all of the baggage on the gf and expect them to fix all of their problems and love them unconditionally to heal them and probably then dump the woman after she has done all of that for him. I think it's very fair to expect from a bf what you can give yourself, and that's why we can have what others call ' high standards' They will also use their mental illness as an excuse for everything shitty they do in the relationship. They will also be inconsistent and unstable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 08:21 AM
68

I kinda wanted to do a study related to porn and men for my final year project but I doubt it would pass. I'll have to think of something useful to do though. It's awful nothing is happening about it! I still hear and see so many people saying porn is normal porn isn't damaging, some may be ignorant but some still believe it and most importantly millions still watch it. But I don't understand how you can't think and see how bad it is when you watch it? Can't they feel the effects it's having on …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/20 09:27 AM
11

I hate how it's not even just in porn, you can't just switch that off, like exclusively in porn seeing women as objects then irl suddenly you don't anymore. I hope in the future porn doesn't exist but it will get worse before it gets better with vr and everything
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/20 08:40 AM
40

Omg such a good point! Oh ALL MEN WATCH PORN SO I MUST DO TOO I AM THE SAME AS OTHER MEN I WANT THE SAME AS THEM But then if you say about men being trash to women or crime or whatever it's NO NOT ALL MEN MEN ARE DIFFERENT I AM DIFFERENT Glad you're dating a non porn sick dude btw, hope it goes well
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/20 08:23 AM
14

So he asked a question then you got banned for... giving an answer?! 😅
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 10:17 PM
8

This is a bit of a sidetrack but the thing that really upset me the other week is that there is a Billie eilish inappropriate thread. Full of middle aged men wanking to an 18 year old woman, saying all sorts of disgusting things. I was so appalled. Same as on her insta posts (I'm a fan of her music and her) you get the pervy comments in there. I just feel so bad and disgusted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 05:39 PM
7

Crazy how wanting a clean and fresh smelling bf is 'high standards' now...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 10:03 PM
122

Yeah it's so much easier for women to perfectly distribute their body fat to their specific requirements and move their bones to be a 'perfect' shape and have a perfectly symmetrical and beautiful face and whatnot than it is for a guy to yannoe shower, shave, and do a bit of exercise
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 10:10 PM
44

Isn't he being super controlling? Telling her who she can and can't meet in case anyone contradicts him, telling her how to birth her child for the sake of his shrivelled up penis. I hope she doesn't get trapped with him once she has the baby :/
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/20 08:22 AM
57

I would say to my nvm ex about how most guys can't have women friends and would have sex with them if they had the opportunity, men want to use women for sex etc and he would always disagree with me, because he didn't want to admit that about himself. Then he would basically make the same assumptions about other guys with me. If I had male friends or lived with males at uni then he would 'joke' about how they would pursue me or be attracted to me and how we would have sex and that if they made m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/20 08:37 AM
26

At the end of the 'relationship' I had literally changed my narc ex's name on my phone to 'the shit 💩💩💩' that was probably a good motivator to finally cut the trauma bond, because why would I want to be with a shit when I am a decent, moral, kind person, capable of being a good partner? No amount of cleansing will scrub the shit off some people cos they're shits to the core.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 08:22 AM
41

Agreed, they might learn how to behave better and be better at manipulating but I don't think they truly change themselves. Would take too much work and a huge personality/ life change.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 03:09 PM
140

He's just gonna move on and be a better boyfriend to some other woman
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 02:23 PM
1

I was thinking this! Leave me alone and never question anything I do because I'm allowed to do anything and I'm always right. And why be with someone if you don't want to be with them, ie left alone? What's the point of that... Oh because they want a servant and sex and not a relationship, even an actual friendship
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 09:44 PM
26

Nor will 'making him happy' make him love the woman. And it's bs, men demand so much more than that, and if they just wanted to be left in peace and sex and food then that's not really a relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 11:08 AM
19

I can't even read all of those pathetic excuses 🤮🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 11:15 PM
14

Agreed! You made really good points. I saw a really good article once that sort of had a similar idea. It had hypothetical scenarios on different levels like would it be cheating if they masturbated in the same room as other people having sex, then gradually changing. The point of it was that people view it as fine because it's digital, but irl it wouldn't be acceptable to masturbate in the same room as people having sex. As you said, why is it any different on a screen or in real life? And then…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 08:26 PM
8

I would think we need one the other way round, protecting daughters not sons
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 12:17 AM
35

I'm sorry but I can't support someone's choice to be a sexual object, live by seeking male validation, objectifying themselves. I know trafficking exists and I know how society influences women a lot in this manner. I know we all have freedom of choice to do what we want with our bodies but... it's wrong. And exactly as you said, it negatively impacts all of us women. I agree with what you've said tbh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 11:18 PM
46

If your partner gets raped you do everything you can to support them and help them, and help them heal. If she has to carry the baby that's many more months she has to think about the fact she got raped by seeing her stomach, which is obviously not what she wanted (fair enough if the woman wants to keep the baby in this situation) It's bad enough making your partner have your baby, but to make them carry the rapist's baby. Sheesh. That's two men, the veteran and her partner who think they have p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 04:22 PM
35

Thank you for this, it's very true, because if the woman had no emotions towards them, and it was incredibly simple and pain free then they would have already got rid of them the minute they realised they weren't a good partner. I think in the short term, one might not feel great, depending on how bad the relationship was and how much it affected you, and how attached you were. It's not an automatic fix, if the relationship has damaged you or your life wasn't great anyway, or you weren't doing e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 04:09 PM
23

I hate the whole Karen thing but everyone calls you a Karen if you say you hate 'Karen'
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 10:05 PM
17

Same! If it's a guy I know to be 'bad' in some way or other then I specifically call them a boy, if I don't know them I'll use men / guys. I might change to: Boy = Not a 'real man' 'bad' Man = A good guy Guy = Idk or ambivalent
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 05:07 PM
1

🤮🤮🤮🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 07:47 AM
164

Give them an innocent picture of your face these days and they'll probably masturbate to it 😠
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 02:00 PM
71

I always dress very conservatively to try and make myself invisible. I really hate men looking at me. The face is okay but if they stare at your body, it's so uncomfortable. I often catch men staring at women's bodies and feel so uncomfortable for them. It sound stupid, I obviously don't mind men looking at me if I know them and I'm talking to them, because then they can look at me as a person, not sexualised, objectified, body parts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 08:41 AM
35

I remember talking to two of my friends recently, and they were giving me so many compliments, telling me about all my good personality traits, reassuring me about uni and making friends, how they valued my friendship and that I'm a good person. I was with my niece and she held my hand and held my leg to help me get down from this climbing frame thing. My nephews cuddled me voluntarily. I was so touched by those simple acts of affection. It was in such stark contrast to my nvm narc ex, who only …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 08:31 AM
11

I love this one. Good reminder if one ever starts excusing a man's iffy behaviour.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 07:40 AM
19

I live in England and it's the same here :( I live in a big town and when I go out, I will always see way more attractive women than men. I am a bit particular if just basing it on appearance (personality makes someone more attractive imo), but still, there are more attractive women than men. I say this objectively, basing it on who looks better rather who am I more attracted to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 07:09 PM
6

Hahaha that's great, we'll pay for half of dates when they carry a baby for 4.5 months and all the after effects of having a baby. Sounds like a fair deal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 11:01 AM
103

Yeah if only it was 50 50 on everything. 50 50 on orgasms, 50 50 on chores, 50 50 on emotional labour, 50 50 on everything in the entire relationship. Men do not want to do anything in a relationship these days. Don't want to pay for anything, don't even want to do the asking out or courting. Sheesh, so lazy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 06:01 PM
50

In the emotionless robots part, it's mostly MEN that impose that on MEN. Why else do men have women friends or girlfriends (apart from sex)? Emotional labour. Because they cannot turn to their guy friends and talk about their mental health or feelings or come out to, but they can with their women friends or their gf / partner. A lot of the mainstream feminism (I don't agree with it, but) or most women, don't shame men for having feelings, mental health issues and actually want to improve it. MEN…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 05:59 PM
25

Agreed, to me it just seems like liberal feminism or whatever it's called is exactly the same as things currently are, except it's okay because women are choosing instead of men forcing it upon them. Idk.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 03:51 PM
62

The thing is most guys don't respect girls imo. Maybe there are fewer guys who are really overtly sexist, but it doesn't mean they're treating or viewing or talking about women respectfully.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 08:42 AM
12

Exactly! It's about the expectations
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 04:31 PM
22

It's really great to hear about others flourishing (and finding hvm). It's really helped me realise it's not me, I'm not perfect and have a lot of personal growth and work to do, but I'm a better person and more capable of being a good partner than majority of men, and that their treatment or view of me does not, and will never determine my worth. I was starting to think I was crazy, and starting to think I was alone, but here we have an awesome, honest, real, and supportive community :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 02:22 PM
36

They will treat you like shit, and act like they want you gone, they know they can't provide what a boyfriend is meant to offer, yet the minute you want to leave they'll start the hoover manoeuvre and ask you to stay to keep you stuck in the cycle of abuse and strengthen the trauma bond. My narc ex finally admitted when covid happened (couldn't use me for sex and cuddles anymore) he didn't love me (because he knew that him saying he loved me gave me false hope and kept me stuck) and never had lo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 10:59 PM
28

So he's unattractive, is on a low salary in an expensive area, won't move to a job which has a higher salary now or better prospects for the future, gaslights his girlfriend, shuts her up with a ring and false hope and promises, is kinda emotionally abusive (the yes no yes no to moving which affected her mood a lot reminds me of manipulation & narc abuse), doesn't know what he wants, does not treat her how she deserves. She's really attractive, has a high salary and is on youtube, really savvy w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 10:40 PM
79

In all seriousness animals are actually better companions than 99% of men, I hope you and your dog will be very happy together :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 10:00 AM
48

Porn and cultural misogyny normalizes so much sexual assault and rape. There are so many reasons people don't realise until afterwards. Some people think it's just black and white, one clear scenario where a stranger clearly rapes you. I didn't realise I was sexually assaulted by my narc ex until many months later. I tried to stop during a blow job (to pause), like I visibly stopped and tried to move my head off to try and stop, and he forced my head down so I couldn't stop, and started saying w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 04:38 PM
76

This reminds me of my NVM narc ex. He would always say 'I live for duty' 'just tell me what to do and I'll do it'. Yet he would also call me controlling, and demanding and overly critical if I did complain about something that wanted to be changed. So not only with LV/ NVm do they not do the obvious relationship stuff and ask you to do it all, or instruct them, they don't even do it when you ask! The 'tell me what to do' is just another way men put the blame on the woman if the relationship goes…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 03:01 PM
25

Exactly! No wonder their partners don't want to have sex with them, being used as a hole isn't exactly fun ...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 07:18 AM
98

Exactly, I dislike men because of their morals and their treatment and views of women. I dislike men because a lot of men treat or view women like objects, many men watch porn, and they have worse morals in terms of crime committed etc. So it's facts, I dislike men because some men are 'bad'. Whereas men will just view women as objects or sexual objects or inferior in 100 ways. Yet no woman is an object, no woman is a sexual object and their sex does not make them inferior. So you can see women …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 10:06 PM
24

It's kind of annoying how much more attractive women are. The average woman is wayyy prettier than the average man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 08:23 AM
7

Sorry I laughed because I called my nv ex a narcissistic abusive asshole. Sorry to be crude but if they're an asshole then all they're going to do is... poo ... so get out and stay asshole free. Narcissists are honestly the worst and they will never change, they literally break you and drive you insane. Please leave and go NC, block on everything. As others said the narc abuse sub is good and also go to therapy. At first it's tough when you withdraw from the addiction (because they're more like …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 05:44 PM
30

Exaclty, playful when swimming is giving a piggyback ride while swimming or pushing someone around on a lilo or playing catch with an inflatable ball or playing around!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 11:42 AM
7

That's a good point, they can't be primate apes and developed intelligent logical people, and switch in between when it suits. But oh according to their so called 'logic' they can.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 09:10 AM
11

Sometimes I do wonder how so many men can naturally be such assholes without even trying!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 09:07 AM
11

Lol same I always instinctively grammar correct people and cringe, perfect grammar is uncommon
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 09:01 AM
65

Way too soon. And he probably only likes 'sex in a relationship' cos it means regular sex with one woman who would just have sex with him, and he he would not get close to having that much sex if he was single looking for hookups.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 12:30 AM
37

It's annoying how just because they've set the bar so damn low that any man who is slightly above it is highly praised, whereas women get no recognition or appreciation for being high jumpers. Like a man gets praised and awarded for finally saying porn is a bit bad? And then when they say it, they act like wow! My brand new revelation which doesn't have a ton of research and evidence for years proving porn is bad. All because most men go around saying porn is wonderful and not at all problematic…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 11:04 AM
29

'TaLk To HiM' - somehow I don't think simply 'talking' to a LVM about his deep rooted issues and shitty behaviour is going to magic these sorts of men into being decent people and good partners
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 11:03 PM
24

I was gonna say I hope she sent a picture of old men's butt cracks or animals taking a poo or something gross & then blocked.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 09:27 PM
4

I guess if he wants to be alone a lot recently then it would be a good time for you to take a break at the very least to focus on yourself and your own life. And same for him too, he can focus on improving his mental health. Then you can re assess the situation, if you feel like he is a HVM and will provide what you need and adds value to your life then continue after the break, but if not then end the relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 03:42 PM
12

Woah they're being ... honest? Wow! That doesn't happen often!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 09:12 AM
75

Just the way women and treated and viewed every single day in every day life as well tbh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 09:11 AM
61

Men have so many excuses, if you say porn is degrading to women, they say well the porn 'stars' like being degraded, they degrade themselves by choosing to do porn. If you point out a lot of it is non-consensual, underage, and violent, they say no it's not they chose to do it. Like I'm telling you, many of them don't choose to do it, or they don't know the 'script' and they can't say no to it when they've agreed to do it, and they'll basically just say NO it is consensual. If you point out that …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 09:10 AM
33

Exactly! She would probably do things with her friends & family and mention this, mention being busy at this time? I would subconsciously do this, not as a hint, but as normal conversation. Idk if they live together but if they don't, you have to plan to meet up and she would say, e.g. oh I'm not free Thursday as I'm eating out with my parents for my birthday? Also, how hard is it to remember one date? Or to put one date in your phone calendar?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 07:18 PM
6

This is so true! Even when they try to communciate the problem, does anything happen? Get resolved? Probably just get worse treatment and the deluded guy thinks she's the bad one. And most of the time, it should be obvious, even if they did it unintentionally, and if they knew what they were doing then they're just a manipulative jerk . Guys also need to learn SELF REFLECTION
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 09:01 PM
13

Just looking for shitty excuses and hoping to solicit even more empathy, as if women don't already give too much of that
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 08:58 PM
22

So true. If you can't tell them about how the relationship is going and how the guy is treating you, you know it's wrong, you know you should leave and they're gonna say you should leave. If you tell your friends / family and they're reasonable and express concerns / say you should dump him, then listen. Also, it's good to think about if your friend / sister / Mum or any female was in the relationship you are in, would you tell them to stay or go?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 09:35 PM
5

They're more suspicious than openly 'bad' guys
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 09:32 AM
17

I just kind of think, most of the time the guy isn't ignorant to what he's doing, as this sub often says, if he wanted to, he would. So is he really going to change because some therapist says it? Isn't it more of a show, like I'm trying to improve and save the relationship by going to therapy but I'm not actually changing! If the guy is manipulative too, then he's probably gonna manipulate the hell out of the therapist. The therapist is probably also going to try and have a balanced view and sa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 09:28 AM
11

Ah okay, I guess everyone is different, I watched it for the first and only time when I was 18 and immediately thought this isn't good and researched it a little and became a bit anti porn. My ex then had a porn problem so I researched it very thoroughly and became strongly against it, I guess because it had affected me & someone I loved personally, I really understood? It's pretty common for people in our generation to 'grow up' with porn, if you watch it or know about it from a young age, you …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:34 PM
11

Gosh I'm sorry you had to experience such disgusting behaviour. And sorry to the world there's people like that in it 😓
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:19 PM
24

To be concise and not engage in arguments, I say: It has numerous negative impacts on the individual, relationships and society. Masturbation has positive effects, pornography has no positive effects. (Spend 30 mins googling 'why is porn bad' and you can find an abundance of material and read it). Edit, But seriously, isn't it obvious from watching it what the f is wrong with it?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:15 PM
2

I turned my read receipts off because my NV ex would read my messages and reply 0.5 - 2 hrs later and we had so many arguments about it. I've kept them off due to a lot of personal issues I haven't been so fast at replying to people these past months. I think read receipts can be useful, more transparency so I don't personally think it's a bad thing to keep them on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:11 PM
33

Same. You can't say you love someone while you're continually hurting them emotionally or in any way and not treating the one they supposedly love like they love them. Or that the problem is incompatibility, when actually it's them that's the problem & they don't actually love you. Also people with certain personality traits (low confidence, high empathy etc will be more likely to attract toxic people). But it is definitely about boundaries. Everyone needs to stick to their boundaries and logic
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 03:32 PM
40

Not just too early, something I shouldn't have done is stay up all night talking to him! Tbf it was summer holidays, but I was exhausted and had to take naps and got nothing done. Because he wanted a lot of my time at the start I gave it to make him happy, and did nothing for me. So when the love bombing stopped I felt so empty and lost. Now I have my bedtime, and bedtime routine no man will ever impede on!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 02:14 PM
12

Would he want to try it? Does he want a fat white cock? 🤮🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 09:57 AM
7

Definitely one of the things I've learnt the hard way last year: Actions >>>>>> Words. Anyone can say anything. Words are basically worthless until there are actions to back them up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 09:55 AM
13

My ex only looked cute because I thought he had a great personality, didn't have good dick game either. Now I'm like 😑😑😑👋
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 09:53 AM
55

'The boys' 'The lads' gawd they would do anything for them and spend so much time with them! Prioritize them over their partner all the time! They don't care about that level of devotion and servility and time with their gf! My scrote ex was like this, did whatever his friends asked (mostly playing computer games). He had discord or whatever and permanently has them on call. Literally permanently. If any of them messaged him he would reply asap. He had exams and a day before a friend asked him f…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 09:47 AM
12

I love to hear positive things like this! Well done :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 09:48 PM
47

Narcissistic toad who wanted to use me for sex when I was 17. 'Your boobs are tiny he laughs' 'You have a nice body (but not a pretty face, not pretty enough for me to date)' 6 months later, nudes???? Are you still single???? Can we have sex???? Check me out, isn't my non existent 6 pack so hot???? I laugh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 07:31 PM
24

I was thinking that, he's probably doing it to trap her or something, but why at 21 is she just being a baby machine? Doesn't seem good whatsoever
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 06:15 PM
28

Creepy perverted older men are the worst. Lk paedophiles too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 06:01 PM
21

Love bombing is scary because done well, it doesn't feel bad for the victim, it makes you feel good about yourself. Done poorly you feel uncomfortable or creeped out. But either way you can find yourself sucked into a narcissist relationship you really didn't want. I wish I had found out about it 10 months later. It's really good to spread the awareness about manipulation tactics such as this to women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 05:48 PM
12

I'm in the UK and still a problem here. Don't get me started on computer games. I didn't realise the extent of the problem until my ex. His friend group from school were all 'gamers'. Funny how he hid this from me the first few months we went out. Then you get so much stick from men & pickmes if you criticise their obsession / addiction. It'S jUsT a HoBbY! Do you ever hear of these bfs / husbands going back to reasonable gaming use when their partner complains? If they won't moderate it themselv…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 01:32 PM
67

For men who think we're 'gold diggers' too, thoughtful and kind gifts don't even require £££s either.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 04:08 PM
45

Men just hate knowing they're useless. Wish we could choose our sexuality
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 07:42 PM
1

Personally I get offended if a guy wants to do doggy style or something similar? (No offence if others like it, that's fine) It's more than preference, more that I kind of judge the guy if that's his desired and favourite position. It's one of the least intimate, bit animalistic, and to me seems degrading is just guy doing to woman, and only genitals touching. But is it wrong to judge a guy based on that?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 09:55 PM
32

Honestly kinda dread to see what the world will be like in 10, 20, 30 + years time. Porn isn't going to be stopped anytime soon :/
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 04:58 PM
26

Good point! Males often talk about their (ex) girlfriends being clingy or crazy, when most of the time, it's the guy's fault in some way or another and is often an excuse. Most 'clingy' girlfriends are simply neglected and not genuinely loved by their bf's. Most 'crazy' exes got driven insane by how bad their bf was, or the guy is so self deluded he thinks she was the problem, or just covers up his ineptitude by blaming his ex. Yet as you said, guys tend to have infatuations or crushes for many …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 04:54 PM
5

It's funny how they only mention and care about these things when women bring up problems (about men)...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 05:09 PM
15

I always wasted so much time asking him for answers, literally stayed in the relationship for an explanation, impossible from a narcissist, who manipulates in every conversation. I eventually just made my own assumptions that he was just a shit, assumed I was right and moved on! You never get the answers you want anyway, they rarely admit to it or give logical explanations. Or they know you want answers and only stay for them, so they mess you around with him to manipulate you into staying. And …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 04:17 PM
24

I was wondering if there is a HVM in bed vs LVM / NVM man in bed?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 04:06 PM
21

Both guys I've been with were pisces. They were not how pisces are described. They were both narcissists, I'm sure of it. Awful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 07:53 PM
2

Yeah that's fine!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 10:50 AM
6

Does anyone know a UK version for this kind of thing?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 07:30 PM
114

Exactly! The key reason why I dislike men is because most men treat women badly, and they're morally worse than women (ie porn). Like we have valid reasons, backed up by things we see and have experienced. Men cannot say the same. As you said they just hate us, and put us in certain roles and objectify us. I don't hate men, I hate the way that most men behave and think.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 10:18 AM
7

Yeah it's what should be standard behaviour!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 09:25 AM
25

Exactly, I have more respect for guys who own their feelings and make them clear through their words and actions, and don't play games.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 07:42 PM
123

Yeah cos we only care about men having a job so we can be bought presents and have our kids paid for, sure! Maybe because we don't want to have to pay for them? And that most adults should have a career or job? That being hard working and financially independent and ambitious are good qualities?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 06:44 PM
24

How do these things work? Why is he acting like she has a brain? She is just a doll right and not a robot?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 08:10 PM
151

You get nothing for doing it. You can give them the moon and they'll say they never asked you to. You can give them all your love and devotion and they'll say you're boring and the relationship is boring for you giving them everything. And then move on to 'better' women. Should never give so much to get nothing in return. We're not their mums or therapists, they're grown adults and should act like one. Oh and then you get so much societal misogyny on top of this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 11:39 AM
11

I wish it was true that men and women can just be friends, in less close friendships, I feel like often on the women's side they honestly only see the guy as a friend and would never consider having sex with him, but it's not the same for men. Best friends is a no no. Most guys that have 'befriended' me have usually wanted more, sex or relationship. But then I did have a brilliant friendship with one guy and he never suggested or mentioned or did anything. At the very least the guy friend usuall…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 10:03 PM
110

So many awful terms, getting laid, screwing, banging, need I go on 🤮 Can be a good way of warning you against guys though imo
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 03:36 PM
6

It's quite common for narcissists to have parents who promoted and encouraged them in some areas (education, sports, hobbies) but neglected them in other areas (emotionally). I saw this with my ex's parents. On the outside they looked perfect, good jobs, financially stable, normal people, nice to me, wanted their kids to do well, invested in their futures (see importance of education & being smart and hard working). Yet whenever I went to their house, his younger brother would be ignored and pla…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 01:00 PM
9

This is a great point! They always use the bIoLoGy excuse whenever it suits them, as a pathetic excuse. Either they're still cavemen or they're developed human beings able to control their actions
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 12:52 PM
9

I hate how it's been wrapped up under feminism like oh we're equal now so women should make the first move to and ask out a guy it's the 21st century, when actually it benefits men a lot more and creates a worse situation for women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 12:49 PM
22

I wish I found fds a year earlier 😭 Being serious they should have some sort of teaching women about men and relationships in schools because no one ever gave me any advice or warnings. Seems a shame most women will inevitably have a shitty relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 10:31 PM
2

Oh no same 😭 I thought ah it's better than video games, and less damaging and more sociable, but as you said, they go on forever, my ex also would play all day until 5am. Yet he wouldn't stay up past 12am when he was talking to me or with me. And when I pointed out that playing this long was a big waste of time, and prioritized over me as with everything, he said am I not allowed to play with my friends then? Am I allowed to play today? (Not sure what the term is for when you say something factu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 10:26 PM
4

This is very true, if you look at what porn does to the brain it's similar to a gaming addiction, they're both novelty 'drugs' and rewire the reward circuits
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 07:50 AM
22

Definitely! Some will say they wish they had a gamer girlfriend yet also say the women that play aren't as good as men and are exploiting men, like wtf
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 11:02 PM
38

This is brilliant! My ex was a gamer and a lot of what you said really resonated. Well done for making such comprehensive and clear info on this as well as clearly differentiating the difference between gamer and the guy who games casually. I'm sure its going to become some sort of crisis.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 10:20 PM
120

This is why I don't date gamers :/
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 03:36 AM
36

What the hell! Just when you think they can't get any crazier
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 08:17 PM
1

Nope, I'm guessing over time it's different? Idk I'm a loyal person, and would be respectful to my partner, and personally on looks alone I find very few men very attractive, their personalities usually bump up their attractiveness
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 11:34 AM
15

I saw a recent study that said the negative psychological effects of video games and stuff happen when you play more than 2 hours a day so yeah moderation really is key.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 09:35 AM
10

The gaming thing is a big no no for me, I don't support video games because of the violence and sexism in them (in the game, workplace and amongst gamers). As well as the fact that it's often not in moderation, many guys who are gamers don't have video games as a normal hobby (that you do a few hours a week). They do it excessively and I don't want someone who prioritizes unproductive sexist crap over me. There are many psychological negatives as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 09:34 AM
16

For me yes but it couldn't happen with every guy. Like if I don't think the guy initially is that attractive, but really like his personality and sort of click with him, I might start to see him as being physically attractive whereas I didn't before. But some guys will simply never be physically attractive to me cos they're not what I'm into. Happened with my ex, so kinda lucky after realising he was an asshole he didn't look so cute anymore. So I guess it depends on the person and situation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 01:17 AM
6

I will be going to uni this year for 5 years (until I'm 24). I was wondering whether there's any point entertaining the idea of dating or relationships while there? Like hypothetically would HVM be looking for a proper relationship with the intention of marriage at this age or will they hold off until they are of an age where they have a career and can get married etc? Or will all boys looking for relationships at this age be inexperienced, or just wanting sex or casual meaningless relationships…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 07:36 PM
120

I'm sure this is just a lie people tell in order to make themselves feel better about their partner constantly staring at other women or acting on their attraction by watching porn. Or a lie men tell so that they can get away with that disrespectful behaviour. (Obviously genders can be interchangeable but that's most common way round imo) Me personally, it might seem dumb but when I'm in love I don't really notice other guys, I can't help it but I'm just not interested? Edit, to differentiate, I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 07:25 PM
11

My shitty ex did this. Would boast about the girls we knew who had liked him or made a move on him, repeated the same stories (he knew I hated it) and said it was just a joke and just to tease me. Also said comments at his uni how 'more girls notice me when I get out of the pool and my hair is all messy' or 'I've noticed women just want a guy that's clean and tidy looks wise' or 'You know you said women wear makeup for themselves or other women, well men shave for women' 'I tend to like girls wi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 08:45 AM
11

"I want XYZ" NO YOU DON'T, I TELL YOU WHAT YOU WANT!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 09:04 PM
15

Bwahaha I love your responses, literally make me chuckle
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 08:58 PM
164

I don't understand how a guy can say, hey it's okay I seek out videos of hundreds of naked women (and men) doing whatever I choose and looking like however I choose. And probably preferring this to real sexual activity, and causing all sorts of sexual problems for himself and the relationship. But hey don't be jealous I love you and I don't love them. Hey it's fine, it's normal, it's not cheating or disloyal because I'm not touching them, I'm just looking at and fantasizing about them deluding m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 12:42 PM
44

It reminds me of the time I was on a student forum and asked if a guy forcing your head down until he orgasms during oral after you tried to stop is some form of sexual assault. Most of the guys and girls were saying it's fun. The law disagrees though. Pornsick people and misogyny everywhere. Quite disgusting the guy wants to have sex where the partner cannot enjoy it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 08:41 AM
5

The guys my age have grown up with porn, watching it constantly since 12 or whatever, they're extremely porn sick. This is just one deal breaker so tbh probability is extremely low of me having a boyfriend. You can definitely tell by their attitudes to sex and sexual behaviour as you said. You can have a discussion about porn, in general to gauge their view. Or you can just say how do you feel about watching porn in this relationship? Or start a convo pretending to be interested in porn, what so…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 05:56 PM
1

I was wondering this. My ex "unintentionally" created a textbook narcissistic abusive relationship. Love bombing, then intermittent reinforcement, gaslighting, chronic lying and tons of manipulation tactics. Even his Dad recognised he had low empathy and called him out on it. Also needs to relearn what consent is. He is perfect on the outside, but is quite dangerous, ought to come with a hazard symbol. Not much I can do about this sadly. Personally in your case I would point out the guy's red fl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 09:47 AM
84

Talk about trying to force views on others 🙄 (and a bad view that porn is okay).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 06:06 PM
3

Cats >>>>>> lvm/nvm Channel your anger to do positive things for yourself and life, and let yourself heal and date when you are your strong and best self again
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 11:02 PM
10

I had the same thing with my ex. He was really nice to everyone, family, friends, men, women, strangers, and me for about 3 months. Then switched between this perfect personality, and an emotionally abusive manipulative jerk. Still feel like it was my fault in some way so it's been hard to get over. I was wondering the same thing as you. Why was I the only one who got bad treatment?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 09:09 AM
1

If you complain about their gaming habits or point out they're addicted, they say oh it's good to have hobbies it's just a hobby we can't talk all of the time. Yes, agreed we should have hobbies and be independent, but we should also have a proper relationship that is a higher priority than games, and hobbies not addictions! Does hurt when they pick games over you. They have to learn they don't have time for everything and can't have everything in life - degree / job, gaming addiction and a girl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/20 05:52 PM
3

I agree, video games are often their escape into a fantasy world where they only reap rewards (dopamine) and can avoid their real life problems and bad emotions. But it is a common hobby particularly with the younger generation. How many hours do you think it becomes too much?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/20 09:02 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter