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VelvetKnuckleduster Archive

View 8 posts and 138 comments by VelvetKnuckleduster on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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17

It's important to remember that a HVM isn't one size fits all, some people are perfectly decent but just aren't compatible. A relationship breaking down isn't always an indictment of the people involved, sometimes things just don't work out. I wouldn't hold it against someone who got into a relationship in their late teens or early twenties when life is comparatively simple, and in their late thirties when they're dealing with mortgages and aging parents and office politics they realise that the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/22 09:45 AM
31

Men cry about side effects very similar to the ones associated with female contraception and in the same breath ask why they should need to take it when women's versions work perfectly well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/22 09:25 AM
30

The point of sea-lioning is to drag you into a lengthy, pointless argument. "Pushing back" is exactly what they want, the only way to win is to refuse to play. Stop replying and block if necessary as soon as you realise what's going on. Alternatively, if the conversation hasn't gone anywhere within three posts, drop it and move on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/22 07:17 PM
18

smells like fragrance that isn’t yours I know someone who worked at a perfume counter and she said scrotes would buy two of the same bottle and then brag about giving their wife and girlfriend one each so they wouldn't be able to smell each other.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 03:03 PM
101

In your last couple of paragraphs it sounds like you're conflating being respectful with being a doormat, and those aren't at all the same thing. You can be civil while enforcing boundaries. Treat her like a coworker who you don't particularly like but still have to deal with. Don't force yourself to try to be friends, don't go along with what she wants to your own detriment, but be polite and do your best to keep your emotions under control in the moment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 02:40 PM
41

I've set my messages to whitelist only so I never even know, they're just screaming into the void. Closest they've ever gotten to getting me to read something has been a couple of those "someone is worried about you" reports.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/22 08:39 PM
52

He has a long history of DV, two of his ex wives previously reported him for assaulting them and a third requested he not be allowed around their children because he was exposing them to drugs. He should have been in prison a long time ago. His current partner who he was on the show with is a masterclass in how to be a pickme, she made an IG reel of her picking out clothes for him to wear to court. Can you imagine.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/22 07:34 PM
655

He doesn't feel like he chose those matches? Then why did he match with them? 100% chance he swipes right on every profile and then picks through the ones that respond later.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 08:42 PM
9

Good to see a lot of people in the comments calling out weaponised incompetence for what it is. He's trying the bumbling man act and even strangers on the internet getting the most flattering version of events aren't falling for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 07:00 PM
303

He already told her he didn't want to be married to her. Maybe not in those words, but he made it very clear. She insisted on pushing ahead anyway and he rolled with it, probably because having her around was more convenient than finding a new woman. She's uncomfortable because she knows this on some level and she knew it back then too but didn't listen to her gut.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/21 09:48 PM
129

Fucking gross. The people pushing to accept paedophiles who haven't offended yet don't even have the decency to be ashamed of themselves. If they were asking for intensive psychiatric intervention and monitoring, sure thing, but it's all just "this is who we are, accept us". Not everyone deserves respect and acceptance, paedophiles are prime examples. And anyone who talks about this, stop using the term MAP. Don't let them set the terms of the conversation by choosing the language we can use.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/21 09:49 PM
13

Three days is too much. Even if he can't get into a conversation at that time, it takes 30 seconds to type out "I'm in the middle of X, I'll get back to you later". Leaving you hanging is just rude and it's a sign he's not really interested. Replies should be same day, in my opinion. I tend to put my phone down and not look at it during the work day but it takes minimal effort to get back to someone when you're sitting down to eat or before you go to bed. If someone's really too busy to text bac…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/21 02:49 PM
274

When you prematurely label a man High Value you're potentially putting the blinkers on yourself for when red flags do start popping up and that's how you end up with "I cook and clean and wipe his ass and he doesn't answer my texts during the week but he remembered my birthday". It's natural to want to see the best in people, especially a potential partner, but it's also natural to want to think the best of yourself so if he already has the label you'll be more inclined to overlook problems to m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 04:10 PM
30

low maintenance mean lower energy and input? This is what they mean by it. We tend to think of it as "I want a woman who wakes up with perfect skin and hair like a model" but that's really just a bonus, what they want is a woman who'll be grateful for the absolute bare minimum and never ask for any more.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 11:25 AM
43

I've seen men argue with a straight face that watching porn is natural, as if the earliest homo sapiens had pages of BDSM compilation gifs with infinite scrolling streamed into their cave dwellings at 100mbps.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 10:50 AM
13

If he's earning big money to the point where your contribution would be negligible, let him pay for everything but make sure your name is on the deed. If you're in the same tax bracket, bills should be split proportionally to your incomes. There's a 38% increase from 47k to 65k, so he should contribute about 1.4 times what you do (eg. your mortgage is $1200, you pay $500 and he pays $700. Don't quote those numbers, I have an arts degree.) A joint account can be handy for that but never have your…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 10:14 AM
29

Ironically, this man is in dire need of a porn addiction therapist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/21 05:16 PM
24

She says they have a joint account but the money is coming out of a separate savings account he has "to buy a truck". I hope she wises up and gets her half of the money out of there before he empties his savings and starts on their joint assets, because he will.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/21 05:14 PM
27

I wouldn't have left the food and the game tbh. I know people will say she was showing him what he lost. but if he was having an affair he already didn't appreciate her. When a man doesn't value you, giving him more of the same won't suddenly change that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/21 03:41 PM
21

This is getting into the territory of stalking and harassment, which are illegal and you should report him. Gather as much evidence of his previous attempts to contact you as you can and bring it to the police, they probably won't be able to do anything immediately but it'll start a paper trail that you can use to get court orders to leave you alone and possibly criminal charges. If you think he's planning something imminently and the police won't act on it, make your safety a priority. Try to s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 11:18 AM
10

You have a year to make a decision but I think you already know what the answer is. On the surface of it you're uncomfortable with him having this groomsman, but the crux of the issue is your fiancé is okay with deception and infidelity in a relationship and he got mad at you for not being okay with it. Your moral values don't align with his and it would be unwise to make this man your legal life partner because it's unlikely he'll have a change of heart.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 02:39 PM
26

It's so fucked up that it ever did hold up in court when the women aren't even there to say otherwise.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 01:06 PM
24

Yes, my mother had a boyfriend (not even our father) who hit and emotionally abused my siblings and I in front of her and she still stayed with him for years. Even though I'm older now and I understand the complexities of abusive relationships much better, I still feel like the needs of the children in that situation override the needs of the mother because they're victims too and don't have the choice to try to escape. You're responsible for your kids. You're supposed to endeavour to do what's …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 09:13 AM
28

A couple of years before I got into FDS I dated a guy who was, in hindsight, a raging porn addict. I have no interest in dealing with a guy who has that problem again, just like I wouldn't date a compulsive gambler or someone with a cocaine habit. If they want it so badly, fine, they can ruin their own lives but I'm not going down with them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 11:21 AM
136

Maiya, a barber from Landover Hills, said she told one of her clients that she and her wife wanted a baby. The client, Jonathan Patton, said he wanted a child too, according to Maiya. The three of them then decided to start a family together. WTF they didn't even get a close friend or relative to be the donor, it was some random dude coming in to get his hair cut.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 06:12 PM
38

It’s about getting strangers to validate his experience/ victim narrative. This is the correct answer. He's not looking for advice that might fix the problems, it's all ego driven.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 06:09 PM
294

The time of my life when I got the most attention from random men was when I was about 14. Girls and younger women are often conditioned to be meek and timid and accept bad behaviour from men, and definitely not to defend themselves. Creeps prey on that, they can smell that lack of resistance the way sharks smell blood in water. As women get older, for most of, even when we're still very attractive or young looking, something hardens within us where we become less receptive to shittiness from me…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 12:52 PM
87

In The Gift of Fear, Gavin de Becker said that when a dog that's usually friendly takes an instant dislike to a man it's because the dog is picking up cues that you're uncomfortable with him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 11:05 AM
37

Last year a former friend asked me out and at the time I couldn't put my finger on why I found him incredibly unattractive even though I had liked him as a person up until that point. Low energy and not masculine enough didn't really fit, but passive does. I felt like I'd end up dragging him around after me, making all the decisions, and while I don't think he was malicious I can tell he wouldn't have the fortitude to keep our lives ticking over if something serious put me out of commission for …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 10:39 AM
39

It's not just Silicone Valley people, my parents were both software/communications engineers and I didn't get a smartphone or my own computer until I was an adult and bought them myself, when I was a teenager going out with my friends I got an old brick phone. They taught me how to use computers but only after drilling online privacy and safety into my head. People who understand the internet don't want their kids on it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 06:23 AM
2

Abortion is unfortunately not an option for a lot of women. I'm from a country where abortion was illegal until quite recently, traveling for one was expensive and beyond the means of most women and pills from online pharmacies were often seized at the border. A lot of us have no choice but to plan for the worst case scenario.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 07:22 AM
31

A man doesn't have to be an abuser or a blatant asshole to model a bad relationship that you don't want your potential kids to see and imitate. A man who's inconsiderate of your feelings, or feigns incompetence with chores he doesn't want to do are little details that a lot of women would overlook because "it's not that bad" but if you have kids with that dude they'll grow up to either repeat those behaviours or accept them from their own partners. Every low value scrote that gets dragged on her…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 04:28 PM
65

No, it is always the case. A guy can play with his kids and take them to soccer practice and teach them to ride a bike and do everything right on paper, but if he comes home at the end of the day and disrespects their mother they'll learn on a deep level that relationships are just like that and their adult lives will be poorer for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 03:47 PM
63

They're not great fathers if they're terrible husbands because they're modelling a poor relationship dynamic that their children are likely to repeat. Having kids or not isn't really the point though, I was trying to frame it as more of a thought experiment to objectively evaluate the long term value of a man you're considering getting into a relationship with. If you'd be disappointed by your hypothetical son acting like him, he's not right for you either.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 03:32 PM
58

I made a post about this a while ago, pointing out that even the stereotypical 50's housewife didn't do all that by herself. Having at least one domestic servant was extremely common up until the 1960's for middle class families. Having to work was something poor women did until they could get married themselves, and having to work as well as take care of your own family was a very lower class thing to do, reserved for the wives of men with addictions or disabilities, and, in the pre-civil right…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/21 08:37 AM
10

I resold my real designer bag and got a replica instead, and I prefer the fake one. I couldn't carry the real one around all day because it hurt after an hour or two, the replica looks the same on the outside but it's lighter an doesn't dig in to my shoulder as much.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/21 04:10 PM
46

Germany too, the owner of a large chain of legal brothels was sent to prison a few years ago for working with gangs who were trafficking Eastern European women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 12:08 PM
12

You phrased this so well! As someone who appears to fit the "perky goth" trope, men like this are the absolute bane of my life. Like how givers attract takers, women with very energetic and intense demeanours are bright, flashing beacons for energy vampires. And just the same, the giver runs dry while the taker remains insatiable. This is also an argument for how being put on a pedestal is just as dangerous as being negged. He may be happy to have you, even think he loves you, but he loves you a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/21 01:30 PM
60

Because I knew that the young lady would suffer in her internship very negatively, and I had so much seniority, and close to retirement, I filed the complaint, saying it made ME uncomfortable This is some true queen shit right here 👑Looking out for other women and making the world a better place for those who come after you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 05:55 PM
4

You know that's not what anyone is saying. I don't think many people here would feel bad for the dude in a situation like that but telling OP to do it blatantly in a professional setting is straight up bad advice that would compromise her position and probably backfire badly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 05:45 PM
5

Two wrongs don't made a right when it comes to workplace discipline. When if his boss complains to hers about inappropriate behaviour, then she's on the hook. Better to document it and get legal advice bout a sexual harassment claim.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 05:23 PM
65

Be careful, depending on where OP lives this may be illegal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 12:06 PM
69

Document everything and start looking for a new job. If they're reluctant to deal with this now they'll be reluctant to do anything if it escalates and may retaliate if you press the issue. When you have a new job lined up you should consider taking legal action against your employers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 12:03 PM
14

This actually resulted in a big court case in Germany where prostitution is legal. Some brothel owners actually sued a job agency that refused to post openings for prostitutes 🤮Fortunately the court found that they couldn't compel women to take jobs there because, guess what, it's not like normal work.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 11:28 AM
11

There's an anti-prostitution campaigner named Rachel Moran who uses the term prostituted women in the interviews and talks I've seen her do. That makes it more akin to saying "people who have disabilities" rather than "disabled people", even though she usually doesn't shy away from talking about the crude, grimy aspects of it. She was prostituted herself, starting at 14, before she escaped and became involved in the campaign that successfully lead to buying sex being criminalised in Ireland. She…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 11:16 AM
23

Why are they all making an unhappy version of the Pixar face
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 05:05 PM
10

It's not the case here, but some artists use it like Patreon.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 02:23 PM
62

I've always thought of a simp as the type of quasi-neckbeard dude who calls himself a feminist but justifies his porn addiction it by only having "ethical" paid Onlyfans subscriptions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 02:18 PM
46

I thought it was short for simpleton.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 02:17 PM
7

And can't even proofread.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 02:12 PM
7

That's my favourite too! It really is magic, I have dry skin that tends to get dull but that stuff keeps it smooth and clear.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 02:08 PM
29

You're seeing the base, animalistic panic of addicts whose supply has been interrupted. Similar to what a heroin user who's already sold everything they own feels right before they turn to stealing to support their habit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/20 08:46 AM
80

I saw a comment from a distraught guy who exclusively watched videos of johns having sex with cheap prostitutes. So he knew, before they were even deleted that these women didn't want to be there and were likely being pimped out or trafficked, and that was why he liked it 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/20 08:46 AM
30

That's nothing, I saw comments from guys who had 2000+. How are there enough hours in the day to watch all that?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/20 08:39 AM
11

There was a bit of an exposé about them in the New York Times a week ago about how they've continuously failed to remove illegal and non-consensual videos. That lead to Visa and Mastercard determining that Pornhub was violating their TOS by hostling illegal content and halted payment processing services. Now suddenly Pornhub is very concerned about dealing with the problem they've known about for years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/20 09:39 PM
48

You should have written out your case for an annulment instead
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/20 09:31 PM
10

I had a look at the pornhub subreddit (the temper tantrums are a sight to behold) and a lot of dudes are actually trying to argue "but there wasn't that much child porn!" Like not even denying it happened, just that the amount this removed was small enough that it wasn't worth it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/20 09:19 PM
11

Ah yes, have local backups of all those videos that were removed specifically because it can't be confirmed that they're not child porn or otherwise illegal. Big brain move, right there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/20 09:13 PM
19

Pornhub verified a 15 year old trafficking victim, verified means nothing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/20 08:06 PM
9

Two executives have been summoned to a parliamentary committee in Canada
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/20 08:04 PM
30

The way a guy's friends talk about you is often a reflection of how he talks about you to them. If this dudes friends sexualise his wife and see her as an object, he probably isn't just passively okay with it, he had a hand in it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 09:56 PM
163

My grandparents were married for 60 years and they had separate bedrooms for at leat 50 of those years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 07:54 AM
11

That dog deserves better
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 04:33 PM
4

I feel uncomfortable giving compliments to men because they interpret it as sexual interest 100% of the time and may react unpredictably when rejected. I'm not going to change my behaviour just so it can come back to bite me, men can change theirs if they want things to be different.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 04:18 PM
6

There are men who'll stick their dicks in fruit, cars, and literal holes in the ground. It's not a compliment to be put in that category.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/20 08:40 AM
8

This is one of the biggest problems. Dudes treat other people's real life struggles like hypothetical thought experiments, because that's all it will ever be to them, and take up a contrarian position for it's own sake. It's not intelligent, it actually speaks to a lack of insight and inability to process the information people are giving you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 09:34 AM
10

Or focusing in on one small error you made and redirecting the entire conversation to focus on that while completely ignoring all the valid points you made where you refuted them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 09:27 AM
30

They think it makes them sound stoic and logical. Which is funny because I think getting wordy and poetic is much more effective when you're trying to make an emotional argument, if you're stating facts it should be quick and easy to understand. IRL it can actually be a coping mechanism, trying to intellectualise your emotions so you don't really feel them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 09:18 AM
226

Even if they're not trying to suck you in to bad-faith arguments, men need to input their opinion everywhere. Even in topics they don't know about. Even responding to questions that specifically asked for women's opinions or experiences. They unfailingly begin to drown out women's voices in any women's space they're allowed into, and their posts always get pushed to the top. Women need places where we can speak to each other about our thoughts and opinions and experiences without men butting in …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 11:50 PM
13

When I was about 15 or 16 one of my friends in school sent nudes to an older guy she'd been casually involved with for a short time, who proceeded to share them with all of her male friends. Based on that incident alone, I have never and will never take nude pics never mind send them to someone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 10:56 PM
21

Yes, I think having so many of those posts gives the wrong impression to some women that it's what they need to do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 10:42 PM
26

People scream "listen to sex workers" and then trot out a young, middle class, usually white woman who has an OnlyFans account or does cam shows from the safety of her own home. Impoverished, abused, groomed, and trafficked women are rarely afforded a voice. And then when someone like Rachel Moran, a former prostitute who has spoken out extensively against prostitution and successfully campaigned to have it banned in Ireland, makes her voice heard the same people who say to listen to sex workers…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/10/20 07:42 PM
26

And she's not even happy about it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 11:59 PM
14

Picking a needle out of a haystack artistry
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 11:53 PM
45

There's a world of difference between being a supportive partner to someone who's genuinely trying and reciprocates when you need it, and being an emotional dumping ground for someone who just wants to complain without fixing anything. Too many women become the latter because it just gets into our heads that we're supposed to. Not anymore, there are plenty of people who've dedicated their lives to understanding and treating attachment issues and I'm not one of them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/20 09:41 PM
13

I wouldn't mention something like that with someone I was seeing casually. It's too personal. Those conversations can be had when there's some degree of commitment and you're ready to start having sex with them, and don't even think about ditching condoms until quite a while after that when you've built up more trust.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 11:05 PM
30

I don't want a man who helps out at home, I want one who jut does his share of the work. Like how people call it babysitting when a man takes care of his own kids, it's not. If it was a job outside the home you wouldn't say Jeff is helping out with the accounts. I'm not having a go at you, it's just wild how ingrained this language and way of thinking is even when we're somewhere FDS actively trying to resist it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 07:14 PM
5

Yeah, I misread it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 04:43 PM
36

No, it's just a topic I find interesting. If you're interested in what their lives would have been like, there's a good 3 part documentary about it called Life Below Stairs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 03:35 PM
16

What if I was born in January but I'm wearing a red shirt? 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 03:10 PM
8

Men who fantasise about getting revenge on women use misogynistic insults, more news at 11
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 05:01 PM
12

There was even one person who said "normally I'd recommend communicating with your partner, but..."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 04:12 PM
6

Goals
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 04:11 PM
7

I agree, posting these things is on par with triple texting. It makes it look like he got under your skin.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 04:10 PM
1

Again, dudes in the comments saying we're only trying to snag a rich man. Some are mentioning subservient, which I guess is a slightly different, but still incorrect take. This is such a common misconception among our critics that I wrote a novel explaining how it's wrong a few weeks ago np.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/hwg0bt/high_value_men_and_what_it_means_to_be_one/
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 04:04 PM
4

The only thing I can think of is "don't tell him about your traumas" which is good advice for anyone really, oversharing with people you aren't that close to isn't healthy behaviour.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 04:01 PM
13

What you do is you learn from it. You look at your own behaviours that didn't serve you well and resolve not to repeat them because you don't want to be in that position again. You recognise patterns from others early on and be unapologetic about refusing to tolerate them this time. You feel good about the progress you've made rather than being sad about who you were. We've all learned hard lessons and done things we're not proud of. You are not other people's opinions of you. You know you've ch…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 01:49 PM
244

The idea that women need a relationship to be complete is a lie to make us settle
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 01:36 PM
6

Yeah, I'm not sure what you're asking. Like, effective communication strategies and how to make it more serious? I think pretty much all of that is being aware of your emotions and making your partner aware of them. Which really goes back to personal development.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 01:20 PM
35

What would you do to have a fulfilling life outside of a relationship? Imagine you were going to be single for the rest of your life, what would you fill your time with to make yourself happy? Build your career, find hobbies you love, create things, travel, read books, spend time in nature, work on your dream home? When you're working towards a life you'd be content and confident to live alone, that makes you high value. And a high value man is one you can share that with, not prove yourself or …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 01:13 PM
18

I mean, if you genuinely liked the person wouldn't you want to continue to be friends and not because you feel like you should? If they have qualities you wanted in your life so much wouldn't you still want them in your life in a platonic way? Spending time away from someone because it's painful is one thing but more often it seems like they never really cared about or respected you all that much and you're better off not trying to be friends. That post honestly reads like the the woman was just…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 01:01 PM
61

I'd be more inclined to say nice things about men if they didn't interpret it as sexual interest 100% of the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 12:34 PM
5

Oh yeah, there's no way he actually did it. I was just letting the people saying there's no way you could spend 15k on a single computer know that it technically is possible.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 06:42 PM
10

As bullshit as his story definitely is, an iMac Pro with all the upgrades would be $15k.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 03:27 PM
2

I got a code through my reddit account, but my account on the website wasn't verified and I got an email saying I needed to ask for a code which I already did. Was it because I tried to pick a different username?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 02:38 PM
16

I agree, being able to maintain platonic friendships with women without sexualising them is a good sign that a man respects women and sees us as people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 07:06 PM
13

That was a very brave thing to do, I'm proud of you! I highly recommend moving somewhere he won't be able to to find you and preferably with other people, a spare room in a friend or non-immediate family member's house would be ideal. If that's not an option, contact local women's shelters, they have safe houses for situations just like this. Leaving an abusive relationship is dangerous, but you'll be much safer if he doesn't know where you are. Save any communications from him or mutual friends…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 05:01 PM
14

You really shouldn't post pics of your face here, there are some male lurkers who's dox and harass users here if they could identify you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 09:18 PM
18

That is what's expected of us. To pour all out energy into realising a man's dreams and forgetting that we had any of our own.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 05:21 PM
19

Those "great" men of the past usually had not only wives but domestic servants or slaves taking care of all their needs so they could focus on their own achievements. That was common less than 100 years ago, servants didn't really fall out of favour until after WWII and the rise of the middle class. So when you talk about a supportive girlfriend helping a man reach these heights, you're really talking about one woman doing the work of several people to support a dude she's not even married to. A…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 05:18 PM
2

You should be careful about posting pictures of yourself, a lot of men who get mad about the things we say lurk here and will gather information to dox and harass users. I know it's not your full face but it could easily be enough to identify you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 01:22 PM
37

Everyone gets watered one a week and if they can't survive that, it wasn't meant to be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 01:06 PM
15

Urgh, the first dude I ever got involved with (when I was 19 and he was 30) did this. Insult other women behind their backs, say "you're not like that, you're cool" but then point out things that were 'wrong' with my personality and make me insecure about who I was. He did a lot of psychological damage that's taken me years to work through.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 07:57 AM
11

Someone in the other thread said it's inaccurate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 07:37 AM
15

1) Don't go off your meds for a guy. Like, ever. 2) Being a good person (assuming is is) doesn't mean he's good for you. Some people just aren't compatible. Listen to your gut. If you feel something's not right, something's not right. Whether that's a big thing you don't consciously know yet or something as simple as not being that into him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 08:21 PM
64

It's part of the male power fantasy too. You see it right here on reddit, dudes writing fake revenge against women stories always describe themselves as 250k per year gymbros with no mention of any other positive traits, like that's all they need to be desirable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 07:40 PM
50

Seeing other women have epiphanies like this is one of life's great joys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 03:56 PM
21

I can understand hesitating, I've been in this position before (without knowing) and there's a pretty high chance of the girlfriend lashing out at the wrong person and causing a lot of problems for the other woman who was trying to help her rather than the boyfriend. A lot of women will feel threatened and fight other women rather than direct their anger at the man who deserves it, unfortunately.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 02:08 PM
27

JFC the guy saying they need to teach boys to ID their potential partners to make sure they're not underage. The problem wasn't that he didn't know she was 15, the problem was that he knew and didn't care. If he's trying to convince people she shouldn't be on a registry, he's doing a bad job.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/20 09:06 PM
4

"High Value" implies he's adding a lot to your life. It's a label that's earned over time, not assumed and then rescinded if he proves otherwise. I'd say calling someone a HVM after three months is pushing it at the best of times, anyone can be on their best behaviour around you for the first few months. That's without considering the fact that he's pushing for a step that you're not ready for or comfortable with, and would be to your detriment. Really think, is having this guy in your life a ne…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 04:18 PM
14

That's the most honest name for a fetish I've seen in a long time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 03:50 PM
14

Male oral contraceptives failed clinical trials because the side effects were pretty much the same as the ones associated with the pill and it was considered unacceptable 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 03:45 PM
21

The internet is the only place he's going to be seeing them with that attitude.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 03:39 PM
19

I had to replace my phone recently and it cost more than any of these, and it's going to be obsolete in a few years. If a guy can't spend at least as much on something that you're supposed to wear every day for the rest of your life as he would on something that's going to be upgraded every 1-3 years, is he really looking at your future relationship in terms of decades? I think cheap rings (cheap being relative to your lifestyle) are acceptable as a placeholder if you're getting something custom…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 03:37 PM
11

I'd say it comes down to knowing the guy well enough to know the intention behind it, which is why vetting is important. Older rings usually are good quality and often have a lot of sentimental value, and they can be a nice symbol of how he wants you to be a part of his family. And the money he didn't spend on the ring can always go towards your wedding or honeymoon.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 02:58 PM
10

I usually say don't give them the satisfaction of a response but that last line is a stinger.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 02:38 PM
59

The dudes who say pumpkin spice lattes are basic are the same ones who were, or would have been if they were old enough, memeing about bacon in the early 2010's
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 02:33 PM
45

You can go to a literal sperm bank and have a baby all alone if that's what you want, no need to tie yourself to a subpar dude for 18 years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/20 03:56 PM
67

Yeah I saw one where the boy claimed he found out a girl he went on a date with was on FDS so he dumped her and told every other boy in school so no one else would date her. Made her cry because she was doomed to be alone, apparently. If there really was a girl and she followed FDS she'd appreciate the trash taking itself out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/20 03:54 PM
6

Personally I'd consider a proposal within a year suspiciously quick and possibly a part of lovebombing. So many women have become trapped in awful situations that they were railroaded into before they had enough time to really know the person they were getting involved with. So many more women are tied to terrible men for life because they got pregnant too quickly. There's a lot to be said for not wasting time on a man who isn't really committed to you but it's important to remember that a ring …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 04:38 PM
42

Nice guys perpetuate the myth of nice guys, like you'll turn a dude down and he'll have a crying temper tantrum insisting he's the nicest person ever and how dare you say no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/20 01:46 PM
11

Just tell them that's not what you're looking for and it's probably best you don't see each other again. We don't always need the perfect snappy comeback to take them down a peg, if they're upfront about it just appreciate that you didn't have to learn it was a bad match the hard way move on. Unless he's being an egregious asshole, tearing into him is usually unnecessary and not a good use of your time and energy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/20 08:48 PM
4

"Single mothers are the scum of the earth" "Here's how to vet men before you have children so you won't be left to raise them alone" "No, stop"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/20 05:49 PM
3

I don't think you should rely on any one person for advice or support, but that's just me. Take bits and pieces from a variety of sources, like any emotional need. I'd also encourage anyone who does rely on public figures for emotional fulfilment to read up on parasocial relationships, that's the intro to a two part video series explaining what they are. Not saying you can't be a fan of someone and appreciate their advice, but be aware of how much you are connecting to them and how reciprocal th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/20 04:55 PM
2

That's not really surprising considering she did an entire video where she spoke to and encouraged a 20 year old cam girl. That's not something that should be portrayed as a good option for young women and girls, yeah you can make money but the shelf life of that kind of job is pretty short and the internet is forever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/20 04:41 PM
30

I looked at the Twitter account and she has been found safe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/20 07:23 PM
8

I'd hope anyone on this sub would know better than to ask a question like that on r/aita anyway
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/20 05:29 PM
3

In my country most weapons are banned and even improvised weapons can get you in trouble if you were carrying them with the intent to use them that way, so you need another good reason to have them with you. Swiss army knives or multitools would be easy for a lot of people to explain, especially if they could be useful for your job. Ingrown hair tweezers are very sharp and a lot of people wouldn't consider it strange for a woman to carry tweezers around. You could also use a heavy glass water bo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/20 06:36 PM
7

Or if they cared about abortion rights as much as not wanting to pay for their kids.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/20 01:11 PM
6

Even if he was suddenly short of money because an unforeseen expense popped up, he should still make an effort to see you and do something thoughtful. He could have kept the plans for a night in but cooked instead of ordering food. The fact that he's making no effort to stick to your plans in any way means he doesn't really want to. The fact that he's seeing friends instead means you're not a priority to him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/20 10:29 PM
20

This was one of the suggested articles on my phone this morning. I clicked thinking it was going to be something unusual that most people wouldn't see causing problems, not "I don't think women should be paid the same as men." FFS, what's wrong with you that you'd even consider speaking to a man again after he's said that 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/20 09:21 PM
35

Prostitution, like porn, contributes to a culture where women are seen as objects and leads to the disempowerment of us all. We shouldn't encourage LVMs to use either, even if it does keep them out of our hair.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/20 09:16 AM
6

I've done this twice and both times they didn't believe me and just told the guys straight away. One of them got straight on my case, the other got a bunch of friends to lie to cover his ass and label me a whore and a troublemaker. If I knew something about a friend's boyfriend I'd tell her, but wouldn't do it for a stranger again. Too unpredictable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/20 05:04 PM
13

Go into your preferences and scroll down to messaging options, there's a link that says "control who can send me messages". That'll bring you to your list of blocked users, and above the list there's an option to only allow messages from whitelisted accounts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/20 12:48 PM
5

Joint accounts are fine to an extent, they're useful for household expenses and things like that. But you should always keep some of your own money in a separate account that your partner can't access, too many women have been left with nothing during breakups or become trapped in relationships because their husbands had too much control over their finances.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/20 10:10 AM
40

I think it's important to remember that a ring isn't the only way of measuring commitment. The time and energy that a man spends paying attention to you, fulfilling your emotional needs, and supporting your personal growth also shows commitment, and when you measure it that way there are boyfriends who are more committed to their girlfriends than a lot of husbands are to their wives. A ring won't save you from becoming a blowjob maid and choosing not to get married or to wait several years won't…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/20 12:02 AM
3

Big changes in beliefs and values are possible but they require wanting to change, deciding on steps to take and being built up gradually. If you want to run a marathon you don't just do it one day, you wouldn't last long before your legs hurt too much to keep going. You have to start by jogging short distances a couple of times a week and increasing the distance and frequency as it gets easier. If he seemed to flip a switch because you had a problem with something, at best it's a well intention…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/20 03:43 PM
6

You've seen what his baseline is. He may put in extra effort initially when you've made it clear you expect that, but it'll taper off as time goes on until he's back to what he's comfortable with. It's like crash dieting, might work in the short term but it's not sustainable. Also, if you have to drag what you want out of a man is he really worth your time, even short term? You shouldn't be putting in extra effort to get your minimum standards back, especially in the early stages.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/20 03:33 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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