| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 4 | Pickme’s Who Choose Men over Children❤️ (tearing up) I am so glad it helped. My mom picked men/alcohol over me … it did make me a better mother so I guess there’s that. And that is such an awful thing to say to you. I can’t imagine. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/05/21 08:21 PM |
| 7 | Pickme’s Who Choose Men over ChildrenIt is astonishing how willing some people are to ditch everything for new-found “love.” We are taught it is somehow romantic. But you can’t know a person in such a short amount of time. That’s why I love the 3 month no sex FDS advice. Three months is a good amount of time to get to know the reality of a man without being in the “love cloud.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/05/21 11:50 AM |
| 5 | Pickme’s Who Choose Men over ChildrenI 100% agree with you. Being able to question is a good indication of an empathetic person with good intentions. Intent matters. This is a woman who genuinely loves and cares for her kids. ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/05/21 11:45 AM |
| 9 | Pickme’s Who Choose Men over ChildrenAgreed. ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/05/21 03:00 AM |
| 7 | Pickme’s Who Choose Men over ChildrenAwww it sounds like you are a strong women with amazing kids. You did that! ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/05/21 02:59 AM |
| 2 | This Queen is Tired of The Dad Bod PropagandaHahahaha I like a bit of weight on a man. But yeah, same pic of a female star w a few extra pounds gets trolled rather than kudos. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/05/21 01:01 PM |
| 3 | I can't think of anything I could say that would be better than her responseFuck. You summarized my marriage in three paragraphs. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/05/21 10:56 AM |
| 2 | I can't think of anything I could say that would be better than her responseI married a Virgo man. Most insensitive prick ever. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/05/21 10:54 AM |
| 5 | Recovering pickme progress storyMy coworker gave me a hazy “hope we see each other after I get my covid vax.” My GFs are like “ask him for coffee!” Nope. If he wants to see me, he’ll ask. And no (fireman, young IT dude, musician) ... you can’t “come see” my new house. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/04/21 05:29 PM |
| 20 | Men who say oddly specific things about their exThinking in reverse, so what is the acceptable way to talk about ex partners? Like I left my husband bc he did not take care of me when I was pretty seriously ill... Example is ... he said “you always ruin my trips to Vegas” when he was on vacay and I called him with my possible cancer test results. It is the truth but I guess it also elicits an “I will take care of you” response. I haven’t dated much so advice is appreciated. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/04/21 03:41 PM |
| 14 | The famous "slug post" from the FDS podcast episode 5. Man makes girlfriend sick by grinding up slugs in her shakes. "aM i OvErReAcTiNg?”Slugs can contain a dangerous parasite. A kid died a few years back from eating one. “So Australian teenager Sam Ballard grabbed the slimy creature and gulped it down. He had no idea that the slug carried a potentially deadly worm that would put him into a coma that lasted more than a year, paralyze his body and ultimately take his life.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 09:19 PM |
| 4 | “It is hard to respect yourself when you are being forced to pick up the garbage of another human being. An adult.”So true. My house is so clean now after my separation. When he comes to get the kids, he always asks if the cleaning people just came. Nope, just don’t have to pick up after your sloppy ass anymore. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 11:29 AM |
| 31 | Reddit in a NutshellWell, I’ve found also smaller means lazier too. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 08:13 PM |
| 11 | Anyone tried this?I actually do this when men ask for pics on dating sites. 😂 I also put a bad photo on the sites. Ha. So many ghosts. I actually love doing it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 02:00 PM |
| 13 | The comments section is a bunch of LVM twisting the conversation to victimize themselves, and pickmes/cool girls slut shaming, as usualUgh, truth. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 01:58 PM |
| 9 | The "cool girl" monologue from Gone Girl has stuck with me long after I watched the movie. Even though Amy Dunne is crazy, her madness touches on the trope I know we've all heard praised or even tried to aspire to.Wow. Hell yeah. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/06/20 11:33 PM |
| 2 | Am I wrong?I haven’t seen one pro-BF comment so.... I think I might. I have said — maybe you should go out with thar woman bc I am not gonna change on thus. Love you all! ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/06/20 09:54 PM |
| 4 | Am I wrong?Yes...I don’t have great self-esteem and he keeps gas-lighting me. I honestly wasn’t sure if my feelings are valid/unreasonanle bc he says other women think it’s no big deal. But it is to me and that it what matters. TY❤️ I really do say it in an non-threatening way. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/06/20 09:05 PM |
| 3 | Am I wrong?So many good ideas here... last paragraph is on point. TY. ❤️ I had to meet the other dude and it was super uncomfortable. All I could think about was them “guy”-fiving (his words — yes they did it) while doubling teaming her. I think is a bit of porn-sickness here too. Normal sex isn’t enough. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/06/20 08:33 PM |
| 19 | Am I wrong?Lol, I wonder about that. He talks a lot about how “masculine” he is — sometimes it sounds like he is convincing himself. My first high school bf was similar and later came out as gay so I wondered if I was projecting. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/06/20 04:22 PM |
| 24 | Am I wrong?Right. I am not his buddy ... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/06/20 02:59 PM |
| 8 | Am I wrong?He’s not asking me to do it — he is talking about it as a positive experience. I personally think continually talking about how positive it was when it makes me uncomfortable is uncool. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/06/20 02:56 PM |
| 4 | Thank you Carrie ❤️I really hate them. I really really do. I think I just prefer freedom of movement — nothing constricting. I have never found a comfortable bra for me (34D). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/20 04:01 PM |
| 35 | This would really help if woman act upon itThis was an epiphany I had while ready “The Four Agreements” — “Don't Take Anything Personally”. In other words, what people think (good or bad) is mostly about them. Some says they like your hair — it’s an opinion based on her preferences. Someone is angry in a meeting — probably something is going on his life. Realizing this relieved me from so much angst. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/05/20 11:12 PM |
| 3 | This national symbol for "romance" is not what it seems!!!Wow, the ultimate fake news. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/05/20 11:03 PM |
| 57 | Fuckboys who treat their new girlfriends to all the things you wanted but never got do so because they're desperately trying to prove you were the problem all along. Recognize it for the manipulative tactic that it is, and don't take it personally.You know, I dated a guy once who was the super spiritual type. He had the answers (to me) about how people should treat one another, what is acceptable in a relationship, life, etc etc. I was in awe ... totally put him on a pedestal. Fast forward six years and he is in an abusive controlling relationship, same as before his “transformation.” I lost respect for him — he was just playing a role of a spiritual guy for awhile. He descended into the hubris. Just so sad. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/04/20 11:24 PM |
| 91 | Fuckboys who treat their new girlfriends to all the things you wanted but never got do so because they're desperately trying to prove you were the problem all along. Recognize it for the manipulative tactic that it is, and don't take it personally.Right...to me, this behavior is generally the “honeymoon” period or what is displayed outwardly via social media etc. I guess there is a possibility of personal transformation, but I mostly doubt that people can change. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/04/20 09:49 PM |
| 10 | I’m crying y’allThis^ ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/04/20 09:50 PM |
| 19 | I’m crying y’allI get that but why does her age matter at all? If she’s a great person and gorgeous, why does her age matter? You are equating youth with beauty which is exactly what LVM males do. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/04/20 07:58 PM |
| 42 | I’m crying y’allWait, why the “in her 50s but she’s very gorgeous” comment? Aren’t we here to support each other? As a 51 year old woman, I know that age has little to do with beauty. That is buying into LVM stereotypes. In fact, I am more secure with how I look as I get older. People see it and often call me beautiful — not beautiful for my age. Just last week, I was joking about shaving my hair bc of the quarantine, and a much younger HVM told me I’m “breathtaking” regardless of my hair. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/04/20 07:42 PM |
| 11 | They start young...I can guarantee he is watching porn. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/04/20 06:58 PM |
| 34 | 32 ? His triple chin says 52😂😂He didn’t have his reading glasses on when he made the profile and hit the wrong key. ;-) I’m guessing he’s legit 52. I just don’t get the lying. The woman is going to find out — and then everything is based on a lie. My ex told me he was poor when we first started dating via OLD. Technically, yes, but the cabin he lived in was on his dad’s $5M mountain estate. Poor by choice with his parent’s money to fall back on is different from working hard and scrambling to make enough to buy groceries. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/04/20 01:36 PM |
| 80 | Just because men wanna fuck you doesn’t mean they like you. Don’t be gullible.So true. All that attention then suddenly few word texts, left hanging, etc etc. The “I’ve been busy.” text. I know better now. F that. ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/04/20 03:13 PM |
| 7 | Imagine speaking that badly of women and not even reaching 6ft.It seems fake to me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/04/20 03:10 PM |
| 7 | This gave me a good chuckleHa! I used to be more muscular but CoVID. Grrrrr. Lost 30# on my bench press. :-( But totally agree about honesty. Seriously — it’s just preferences and that is fine. ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/04/20 01:36 AM |
| 22 | This gave me a good chuckleI’m 5’10”. Totally fine with me if a man is my height if he’s honest about it. I prefer a bigger build though — not a skinny man. And men tend to overstate their builds too. Such a disappointment. I’m a size 4 but I’m not petite. I like having someone who feels like my “protector.” I always try to be honest about my looks (age, weight, whatever)— why not? He is going to see me anyway. EDIT. About lying about their build — you know those pics that people take with a fish held out in front of them… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/04/20 12:51 AM |
| 11 | DON'T DATE SIGNIFICANTLY OLDER MEN.(SMH) so gross | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/20 05:00 PM |
| 17 | I had a phone screen with a LVM — always ask if he has kidsYuk! I always ask if his kids live with him and how often he sees them. It is surprising how many men do not live near their kids, even in another far away state. There are some valid reasons for this, mostly work related (like Military or very specific career field), but personally, I could never live states apart from my children. To me, it is an indication of character/ core values. Children are not a whim. They are an 18+ year commitment where people agree to make sacrifices to raise them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/20 12:46 PM |
| 11 | Wife is so impressed and showers her husband with praise because he's...bakingTruth. 🤮 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/04/20 03:04 PM |
| 8 | I don’t understand pick me women sometimesSome woman advised “Or - if you can find out one or two of his sexual fantasies, making those come true would probably be really meaningful to him.” Yeah, great idea. 😳 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/04/20 12:26 PM |
| 9 | Why are most men so terrible at consoling people?❤️ It took awhile but we will be divorced soon. I feel bad for his next gf/wife. He seems like a HVM, but he is really a selfish man-child. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/03/20 07:39 PM |
| 3 | Why are most men so terrible at consoling people?❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/03/20 07:39 PM |
| 44 | Why are most men so terrible at consoling people?When I was told I probably had adrenal cancer, my ex was on vacation. I called him and he said “you always ruin my trips to Vegas.” Stayed for the rest of the trip too. Aaaaaannnndddd my friends would give him a pass because “that’s how guys are.” Turned out the radiologist made an error — it was non-cancerous. But I didn’t know that for a month or so when the CT was redone. I asked him about it recently and he said “I was really drunk.” Ok. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/03/20 11:55 AM |
| 54 | Women’s coworker always has visible penis - bunch of males comment saying she’s being ridiculous.If it were her nipples, then she would be called down to HR. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/03/20 01:44 AM |
| 15 | The KinkMeishas have officially gone too farI’m feeling this too — something deeper. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/03/20 03:36 PM |
| 5 | Women & gay men have poor body image, look @ underwhelming replies to 'Is this guy hot?' on gay man sub, compare to straight men praising each otherSo so hot. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/20 02:39 PM |
| 36 | During this time...So true for me. I tend towards “doormat” behavior under the guise of kindness. I keep telling myself — he is not my responsibility now. It is not my job to “take care” of a grown ass man. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/20 02:25 PM |
| 1 | Male Friends?I have one amazing HVM friend who I dated, but it didn’t “click” for us. Do I think he would sleep with me if I said it was ok? Yes. We have clear boundaries and a great friendship. Neither of us pursue more. | /r/askFDS | 16/03/20 01:31 PM |
| 10 | Don't Let Back Burner Guys Lurk Your Social MediaI got off all social media bc of this kind of thing (except reddit). I was tired of endless attempts at conversations and/or follows. So much happier! 💚 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/03/20 11:30 PM |
| 3 | Apparently it is perfectly plausible to men to be so black out drunk that the entire memory of their girlfriend is wiped which prompts them to cheat (but constantly deny women’s stories of rape because she doesn’t remember one specific detail due to be intoxicated while raped)I did blackout once in college and made out with a few guys (no BF). I really never drank so I didn’t know my limit. All my fault. Never drank like that again — super scary. I cringe thinking about it now. 🤢 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/03/20 08:26 PM |
| 73 | Don’t apologize unless it was actually your faultWomen are trained to sacrifice our own feelings to make others feel better. I’ve struggled with this too ... If the only reason I am apologizing is to ease the situation or make someone else feel better, I don’t. If I am truly sorry, I do. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/02/20 02:42 PM |
| 2 | Dumped the FWB LVM Last NightSo good! 😀 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/02/20 11:10 AM |
| 4 | Dumped the FWB LVM Last NightGosh we are twins. I was so invested in him but he did not reciprocate. I blamed everything else but him. I had surgery and he was minimally there. My eyes are open now. I of course left the friend door open but I am closing it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/02/20 06:59 PM |
| 5 | Dumped the FWB LVM Last NightYay!!! ❤️ this group helps! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/02/20 06:53 PM |
| 6 | Dumped the FWB LVM Last NightGood for you. ❤️ I am glad we are free of the users. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/02/20 06:40 PM |
| 9 | Dumped the FWB LVM Last NightThat would be a shock... I don’t think so. And ha, bc he sings professionally. This is the long part of the story. We were friends. I refused intimacy with him bc he is a player. Friendship waned, but I pursued it (one of many mistakes). He was getting bored in his “open” relationship and contacted me right around the time I was getting over LTR. (Stupid swoon) He pursued me, I declined. Then, I got horny and thought why not while I was looking elsewhere. It was great sexually but basically I wa… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/02/20 04:59 PM |
| 24 | Would you go on a first date if you didn’t have a spark?Not if I originally thought he was gay — because that’s telling that there isn’t a spark. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/02/20 04:47 PM |
| 14 | OP asks if she should go on another date, (but without alcohol this time). After commenters criticize HER reckless behavior, she even considers apologizing to HIM for getting blackout drunk. “Maybe he didn’t know you passed out” or “If you can’t keep up, don’t drink” offered as words of support 🙄She was too drunk to consent. This is rape. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/02/20 02:55 PM |
| 12 | Dumped the FWB LVM Last NightLol. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/02/20 02:16 PM |
| 32 | Dumped the FWB LVM Last NightI deleted his number. :-) I’ll block if he messages again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/02/20 01:39 PM |
| 1 | HVW makeup, what is the right amount of makeup for a HVW that doesn’t look like a pick me?Thank you! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/02/20 11:33 PM |
| 40 | Making this thread to prove male shallowness: What physical features you have no control over has a man criticized on you before?I had a man recommend a boob job. Ha! I really do love my natural breasts. Broke up soon after. Also, a BF commented on the saggy skin underneath my neck. I had a disease that made me fat, so the skin is because of that. I can’t say I love it, but I’m not fixing it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/02/20 08:12 PM |
| 11 | You do not "miss sex." You miss a fantasy.I agree with uncut over cut. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/02/20 08:04 PM |
| 12 | You do not "miss sex." You miss a fantasy.I agree with you. Out of the five men I’ve slept with, only one was the stuff of fantasies. I think part of it was our communication and his enjoyment of foreplay. The rest took recommendations etc personally (got upset) so I stopped talking. And their kissing/ touching skills were pretty lackluster. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/02/20 08:03 PM |
| 1 | Pick-mes in FDS?Thank you! I think it’s just conflicting opinions within the community. Personally, I place a high value on sex (I’m 50 w/ 5 lifetime partners) and have a high sex drive. Finding a respectful FWB situation would probably help me not rush into mediocre relationships and stay in them just because I had sex. I grew up in the 80s when AIDs had no treatment. It scared me into making terrible relationship decisions just so I wouldn’t add another partner. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/02/20 01:00 PM |
| 6 | Pick-mes in FDS?Honest question — I thought I read something about FWB being ok in some situations in the handbook? I read it all — just couldn’t find it when I relooked. I think it had to do with having an outlet while waiting to sleep with a HVM. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/02/20 12:56 AM |
| 6 | Most men don't care about their sexual healthIt is truly shocking. I’ve required an STD test before sleeping with almost every man I’ve been with and they all said no one had ever asked before. It is awkward esp since I didn’t even sleep with a few after. Personally, I’ve slept with 5 men and test myself somewhere between bi-yearly and yearly. I can’t even imagine giving someone something he has to deal with the rest of his life. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/02/20 12:12 PM |
| 3 | This is why FDS exists. Carefully vetting our partners is imperative!Yep! Divorcing this year. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/02/20 02:44 AM |
| 26 | This is why FDS exists. Carefully vetting our partners is imperative!❤️ It made me stronger! 💪🏼 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/02/20 01:19 AM |
| 150 | This is why FDS exists. Carefully vetting our partners is imperative!Yeah, when I received the results from a CT scan indicating I had adrenal cancer, I called my husband who was in Vegas crying. He told me “i always ruin his trips to Vegas” and stayed for the remainder of his trip. About a year later, we found out the CT was read incorrectly — I had an adenoma that still caused bad issues (Cushings) — but it was not cancer. Even still, (we are separated) he talks about how I never wanted to do anything fun when I was sick. Mind you, I still took care of the kids… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/02/20 11:19 PM |
| 2 | FWB StupidityYes I agree. I think It would be leaving the door open otherwise. ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/02/20 08:56 PM |
| 3 | FWB StupidityYes, so well put. Thank you! ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/02/20 08:24 PM |
| 1 | FWB StupidityThank you ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/02/20 08:17 PM |
| 4 | FWB StupidityI’m new on Reddit. Still understanding the how. I will. ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/02/20 08:10 PM |
| 4 | FWB StupidityYes, I’ve created this dynamic — and I was making excuses so I could be with him. He has clearly made a choice. Thank you! ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/02/20 08:09 PM |
| 5 | FWB StupidityThank you! I need harsh reality. ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/02/20 08:07 PM |
| 11 | FWB StupidityYep, that is the answer. I put myself last. ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/02/20 08:07 PM |
| 1 | FWB StupidityOk I am a new reddit user. I don’t understand how to use it yet really. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/02/20 08:03 PM |
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