| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 193 | Didn’t realize this sub would cause me to be bannedSeriously, they call this a "hate" group, yeah we do hate abusive men, that's cause they're abusive...it's not for no reason. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/11/21 11:39 PM |
| 1 | Something I noticed about being gaslighted. . .I was living with an abusive guy who said, in front of our other housemate "Did I say that? That doesnt sound like me!" and got all hurt and shocked So it looked like I was the bad one, because my reaction was "WTF YES YOU DID SAY THAT TO ME!" He knew exactly what he said. He didnt forget. Disgusting these men are. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/10/21 03:41 AM |
| 3 | Something I noticed about being gaslighted. . .THIS. Everything they describe is actually what they're doing to you | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/10/21 03:38 AM |
| 2 | You rarely hear of the overly cautious woman who was murdered by a scrote.Oh for sure! On one hand I definitely have become more aware of abuse tactics from my experience, and it's definitely helped in a future situation, and I'm proud of myself for noticing and getting out. But it came with a LOT of questioning and doubt if I was crazy. It also didnt necessarily stop me getting into that situation in the first place (it was a housemate, i couldnt have known he would be manipulative/dangerous) so it still makes me scared sometimes there's no way you could prevent thes… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/10/21 02:09 AM |
| 1 | You rarely hear of the overly cautious woman who was murdered by a scrote.OH I didnt realise you were the one who posted it, you didnt have to but I appreciate it...I found it triggering tbh | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/10/21 12:27 AM |
| 2 | You rarely hear of the overly cautious woman who was murdered by a scrote.Then why do you agree with this post? It's basically telling you that you could have stopped it? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/21 02:45 PM |
| 2 | You rarely hear of the overly cautious woman who was murdered by a scrote.Of course you should be wary of men, but this post is saying being wary can stop abuse? It absolutely cannot. The post is hardly discussing men. We need to put focus on the perpetrators' behaviour, and why THEY feel the need to murder and abuse women. This just creates more shame for victims. I highly disagree that it's "more likely," because abusers out there can wear down even the strongest women, even if she was strong to begin with. It doesnt matter what kind of demeanour the woman has. It a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/21 02:33 PM |
| 5 | You rarely hear of the overly cautious woman who was murdered by a scrote.It's because men commit the crimes! They are socialised to become misogynists, and therefore hurt women. Women are not socialised commit violence like they are. Clementine Ford said something interesting where she said she always calls it "Men's violence against women" instead of just "violence against women" to help draw attention this. Unfortunately the way things get talked about, rarely ever is much blame actually put on men, and it's all part of how they can continue to do this. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/21 10:09 AM |
| 7 | You rarely hear of the overly cautious woman who was murdered by a scrote.This is victim blaming bullshit sorry. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/10/21 10:06 AM |
| 3 | I will stop “generalizing” men when THEY stop using, abusing, and killing women. When THEY stop treating us like disposable source of labor. I will stop when MEN start ruthlessly policing & holding OTHER men accountable for all the shit they do to women.In my experience, the ones who scream "not all men" or get offended in ANY way are all guilty themselves of something. It's why they say it. They're really just shutting down the conversations | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/21 09:31 AM |
| 8 | The sign reads “Convince my boyfriend to propose to me.” Harry: How long have you guys been together? Her: 7 Years. Harry: I can’t help you.There's something about his songs that don't do it for me. I wish I could, cause his whole attitude seems great, he shut down a (notoriously) trash Aussie radio presenter who was trying to press him about sleeping with lots of women because of his fame. He was just like 'Uh not really, sorry dude" Seems generally respectful which is nice for a young guy, without bragging about being respectful (also a red flag) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/21 12:19 AM |
| 12 | I think we can all guess how this went down-- Elon must've used his work travel as an excuse to have an "oPeN rElAtiOnShiP", a total slap in the face to Grimes after having his baby!!! Friendly reminder that most wealthy men are LVM who treat women as sex objects and incubators.Why why whyyyy did Grimes think he would be different having a baby with him? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/09/21 11:06 AM |
| 2 | "Good Morning" small talk and other irksI'm glad I'm not alone in this...I'm doing distance with a guy (already knew him, and hes coming back when borders allow) and he loves texting and continues texting me the same day or the next day. I've been feeling like I'm shit at communicating because I dont find it so easy to do, I find it a bit tedious. I'm used to just texting for making plans only, but distance makes it harder/different... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/07/21 07:00 AM |
| 1 | "CoMmUnIcAtIoN"There's a difference between protecting your wellbeing vs whether something is WORTH even talking about. This didnt happen with a man, but I was getting treated like I dont ~communicate~ when i decided to vacate a sharehouse because they didnt tell me the place was infested with mice. I had an important job interview and i was waiting until that was over tobreak it to them that i was leaving. I had to focus on my interview instead of dealing with stupid housemate shit that wouldnt have even been… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/21 03:56 AM |
| 31 | Targeting👏Young👏Girls👏Is👏Wrong👏Millie looks uncomfortable | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/21 01:42 PM |
| 5 | Don’t tell your friends about him too soonYeah, this happened to me where I was with a guy who would say to me "nobody would understand you" (for having human emotions) But as soon as I started talking to people after it was over, of course everybody could understand, and it could have saved me a lot of abuse. Now I've got the right friends who know how to give tough love. It stings a bit ;_; and I still cling to the "good" things of a guy I'm talking to... and they are like "NO. Wait an hour to reply to him and see what he does" stuff … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/04/21 10:20 AM |
| 2 | FDS PODCAST UPDATE: we're going to start doing interviews!She has some great views on how boys should be raised and consent issues and politics. if you stick to certain topics with her I dont see how you should be getting downvoted so bad! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/04/21 10:27 AM |
| 25 | Weekly FDS Chat/ Check InThis is the number one thing I've taken away from FDS. Opened my mind! Dont waste your energy, they'll probably only make you more angry. Cause like what do you even want them to respond? If they're not respectful to begin with, they're not gonna look inside and realise they were in the wrong. There's no point. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/04/21 02:02 PM |
| 6 | About “Not all men“!!The time I experienced this kind of guy in real life, I lived with him. He would be butting into conversations me and the girl had (between us, mind you) to aggressively cut us off about how he hates generalisations because "I'M not like that!" Turns out it's because he was an abuser/perpetrator of rape himself, and he IS like that. They're just defending themselves, they are never bragging that they are actually good. He was obviously extreme, but the rest are defending themselves because maybe… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/03/21 08:41 AM |
| 3 | Just a thought on what you "attract"I guess I just mean - i was having a very hard time mentally when I met this guy, And I started stressing that he might be taking advantage because I "attracted" a fuckboy. Turns out he wasnt at all being fuckboy, and there was no need to over think. He found me attractive and liked my personality, not because he wanted to abuse. Good and bad people are gonna come at differnet times of your life, it doesnt mean you "attracted" it | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/02/21 11:26 PM |
| 2 | Just a thought on what you "attract"Well...I finally cemented my view on that the hard way. I was questioning it so much, driving myself crazy thinking can a guy really TELL? I'd answered that question correct early on, thinking "but he didnt KNOW I was having a hard time?" Instead I went overthinking "Is he really taking advantage of my bad place? Do guys know what they're doing?" Going crazy, looking at those reddit posts. Turned out he wasn't, and he sufficiently proved he was a good guy from the way he handled my fear there. I… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/02/21 01:12 PM |
| 3 | Just a thought on what you "attract"Time and again women are the ones persecuted for being targeted. We can say that a guy looks for a weakened gazelle to target, Bundy looked for chin tilts, serial killers look for gait, size, etc... okay, so? That's exactly what I'm saying! Plus like, does a "head tilt" really make someone "vulnerable?" They use tactics for a reason. Once it's started, there's nothing the victim could have done to stop it. I'm adamant about that. Of course being a woman or being small makes it easier to be overp… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/02/21 12:10 AM |
| 1 | Just a thought on what you "attract"I still think that could be like physical or interest/hobbies based attraction. They dont know your mental state. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/02/21 10:59 PM |
| 3 | Just a thought on what you "attract"This is amazing, thanks for posting | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/02/21 10:18 PM |
| 5 | Just a thought on what you "attract"These are pretty much my real life examples that spurred this post. On the extreme end, I was sexually assaulted when i was in a GOOD place that night. I was confident and having a good time. I could NOT have seen that coming or stopped it. I wasn't vulnerable. I also ended up living with a manipulative, abusive guy, and my other female housemate had never had anything but positive experiences with men and was so happy and positive. We were opposites, and still were both in an abusive situation.… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/02/21 10:14 PM |
| 3 | Yet another reminder why you vet men, so this won't be your future. It's way too common. No thanksI live with gross straight guys who do this. One of them, his gf will do it FOR him if she's here to cook. The only times it's clean is maybe one every 2 weeks. Half the time cause she was the one who did it. One of many reasons I'm actively trying to get out of here. I cant take it anymore 🤮 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/02/21 04:42 AM |
| 2 | Forgive yourself if you can't follow FDS principles perfectly. It's okay to slip up as long as you recognize your mistakes and you vow to do better next time.Then when your bullshit radar gets better tuned, you’ll find more men will pass your stringent vetting and you’ll wonder if you’re slipping, but you’re not. I set some boundaries with a guy and he met them. I was ready to think I had to walk away, but i didnt. Like he really listened and wanted to take things on board. And it's still confusing for my brain, but it felt really mature and respectful, he heard me. Why does it almost feel guilty? I think because of abusive males in my past. Because … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/01/21 06:01 AM |
| 12 | BoundariesGood point. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/01/21 06:24 AM |
| 42 | I can’t tell you guys how many times this has happened to me lmaooooo!My ex boss was once like “omg ok I haven’t told anyone this” about something apparently really bad and personal that happened to him about the time he almost died. But his memory was THE WORST, so he did the same thing again to me a year later and told me the same story and I went along like that was the first time he told me lol. I couldn’t believe his memory was that bad. Def telling that to a LOT of people | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/12/20 11:51 PM |
| 25 | “WhY dOn’T fEmAlEs RePoRt It MoRe?¿?¿?”I got told by the defense lawyer in my trial I was wearing “tight jeans.” Doesn’t matter how covered up you are, they’ll find a way to make it about how you’re dressed | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/12/20 09:30 PM |
| 86 | Anyone else at a point where you just can't trust what they sayIkr this is exactly why I made this! I gave a guy a bit of (flirty) sass because I’ve defaulted to not wanting to take guys shit. Thinking maybe he would flirt back. but he said something really nice and sweet in response explaining himself, yet my brain went straight to thinking that itself could still be manipulation ugh. Can’t trust anything | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/20 12:34 PM |
| 33 | Pay attention to men with abusive patterns of behaviour, they may just be intentionality trying to to induce a Stockholm Syndrome response in their target.Oof this happened when i confronted the man who sexually assaulted me. Started fake crying on the floor going "i feel bad toooo" ew | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/20 10:36 PM |
| 3 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered December 3 2020Dont worry, this puts me off. I meant that more in a rhetorical sense that I cant BELIEVE how it's majority of guys are like this ("normal"), and I'm not about it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/12/20 07:05 AM |
| 7 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered December 3 2020I was talking to a guy and noticed he followed this instagram https://www.instagram.com/the28yearoldmale/ It's Australian so it might be a bit specific, but it's so disgusting. Is this what's normal for guys around my age to think is relatable? The misogyny sprinkled in 🤮 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/12/20 11:20 PM |
| 80 | Why are men like this? This is why I avoid catching feelings at all costs.“Oh what...I was being all nice and acting like I was interested in who you are and pulling you in and you thought I wanted to...get to know...you? Cause lol I’m actually not over my ex I didn’t mean to let you down“ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/11/20 12:41 AM |
| 17 | This was toxic for the girls. I think at the end they should have flipped the script and said “Okay ladies now rank the guys.” What do you guys think?Also...all those dudes are butt ugly lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 12:26 AM |
| 24 | This was toxic for the girls. I think at the end they should have flipped the script and said “Okay ladies now rank the guys.” What do you guys think?I wouldnt even think HOW to rate a guy by a number, like I just can't fathom it? I find him attractive or I dont. There are also guys who I wouldnt say are ugly but I wouldnt go for, but I wouldnt say "he's a 5!" Its just that hes not my type. doesnt make sense in my head | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 12:18 AM |
| 121 | Damn right sis 👸🏽💅🏿💅🏽💅🏻At 25 I got there once. I “found myself” and was happy and free. 5 years later and some very intense downs and I’ve gone back a notch to not having hope :( it’s still not linear | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/11/20 06:30 AM |
| 161 | This is why Reddit’s favourite adage of “just communicate” is so inappropriate. Communication means nothing if you’re with someone who is committed to misunderstanding you.I was living with a guy who would just get defensive when you said your needs in the house. (Aka it wasn’t functioning because he never did a fucking thing) And my other (female) housemate kept explaining to me how important “communication” was. Like DUH I know that. It’s his responses to my communication that were ridiculous She was probably referring to the fact that other things started stewing, but that was because his reactions made it hard to even go to him with more issues. As if he didnt… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/10/20 11:07 AM |
| 3 | Reason 1 out of 30,000Exactly, damned if you do, damned if you don't. When I was younger an ex called me "desperate" because I spoke about putting effort into finding someone on a night out. Isn't trying the same as "putting yourself out there" wtf do these people think you're supposed to do. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/10/20 11:38 PM |
| 48 | Reason 1 out of 30,000I hate sososo much when people say shit like "You just have to put yourself out there" | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/10/20 08:21 AM |
| 15 | He’s been “seeing someone” but they’re “not dating”"play" is more like diminishing anything serious | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/10/20 05:32 AM |
| 3 | Yep.take on the responsibility of being second mom Fuck I'm glad I'm not alone with this. Even now that we’re all older. Not even my mum helped me emotionally the way my parents seem to want me to help my younger siblings. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/08/20 03:57 PM |
| 1 | This is the first time I’ve walked awayNo I don’t think so...he was in a 5 year relationship before me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 02:54 AM |
| 6 | This is the first time I’ve walked awayIt’s kinda specific to the situation. I’ve known him for a few years and NYE was when he was being flirty and I found out he was single. But I didn’t hear from him until late February. When he started getting sexual and bringing up NYE, how he kept thinking about me etc I just asked “why the wait” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 12:29 AM |
| 10 | If he makes an unreasonable request, let him GO. No sticking around, no explaining, no negotiating.I’m glad I’m not alone with this. Obviously I stay strong and keep my boundaries. But it’s more common than not they always fucking ask. Is it age range? I’m 1990 and guys around my age are all like this | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/20 03:01 PM |
| 10 | If he makes an unreasonable request, let him GO. No sticking around, no explaining, no negotiating.I’m not saying I would let them do anal. It’s that they always fucking ask :( | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/20 03:00 PM |
| 33 | If he makes an unreasonable request, let him GO. No sticking around, no explaining, no negotiating.I feel like I’m never gonna find a guy who doesn’t want to ask for things he’s seen in porn. Why are they all like this? Do they think it’s normal? I feel degraded when they try to ask for this shit. They might be respectful of my “no,” but they’ll still ask to begin with. they all do it | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/20 06:01 AM |
| 6 | The bile!I don’t even necessarily think it’s about respecting the man. It’s that they feel like they would have a chance otherwise. “Ohhhh it’s just cause she has a bf, I’ll back off now. If she were single of course she’d be into me!!!1!!” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/06/20 05:10 AM |
| 2 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered June 8 2020Thanks this is really helpful. I’m about to move cities and it feels weird and almost a bit of guilt for moving away from my family. But distance from him so he doesn’t start these arguments will probably good for me | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/06/20 11:04 AM |
| 6 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered June 8 2020I hate getting into stupid arguments with my dad. He's a nerdy type who thinks you should "give guys like that a chance" (he thinks big bang theory is unfairly making fun of nerds, it's that bad) My brother (decent one) was telling us a girl he broke up with wasn't taking it well. Sounded like he was being nice and just concerned. I was saying how it's not at all his responsibility. But that I understood her side, because i've been there. I said how girls are fed the idea that they NEED a relati… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/06/20 01:19 AM |
| 9 | I’ll suck the life out of her & send her to the psych ward and then call her crazyThe fact that he did these things to make you feel inferior won't matter. Dear god I've been there. I was never allowed to point out what he did, that meant I was "blaming" him (yet he is "blaming" me?) and one time he said "the fact you're launching an attack on my character says everything about you" Makes me want to vomit now. I could never win. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/06/20 05:02 AM |
| 3 | I used to be the worst for paragraphs. Now I just dip. Bye!same. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/20 01:08 PM |
| 2 | The tinder subreddit is full of men praising pickmeishas and making fun of girls for how they look... oh and I hope she gets pickedI definitely see this one as sarcasm. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/05/20 01:53 PM |
| 27 | Who is gonna tell her ? Five years spent . Being. Fuck. Buddy. Not. Even. A. Forever. Girlfriend . Ladies remember if nobody knows about you ,you aint his woman .He's also LETTING her think it's a relationship? She's mentioning an anniversary. But it sounds like he's always treated it as FWB | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/05/20 12:25 AM |
| 9 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered 4/29/2020I have a friend who is all about getting "validation" from having sex with lots of guys, sending nudes etc. It's hard to explain to her I'm just so past being all hyper-sexual without her thinking i'm like prude or something. She was looking at me like I'm weird for not wanting to just outright start the ball with a sexual text to a guy who was complimenting me. As if it’s "bravery" for "just doing it first" :/ I dont want to look that thirsty? I know he knows I'm interested. I dont have to go o… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/20 10:19 AM |
| 4 | Get commitment or get movingMind blown | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/04/20 04:31 PM |
| 8 | Pick Me Culture encourages women to objectify and hypersexualize themselves to feel “confident”.This makes me realise when I went through my ~sexy phase~ (especially from about 19-22) I neglected my hobbies and making art. I fully blame that. I was so wrapped up in being appealing to boys and dating that I forgot who I was. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/04/20 07:23 AM |
| 2 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered 4/4/2020I also would like to know this. I feel like I shoudn't be initiating conversations at all? Should that always be him? I'd love advice cause it's not like they're gonna set up a date bc they cant ;_; | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/04/20 09:56 AM |
| 11 | Are all female [twitch/youtube] streamers that use sexual appeal to engage a male viewer base pickmes?More like they’re taking advantage of pathetically horny losers by making money off them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/04/20 12:28 AM |
| 7 | This Instagram post give some very good insight, there’s more to the post I don’t know how to post multiple pictures in one postMind blown. My ex used to always do this. Yet whenever I needed space he wouldn’t respect me back. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/20 11:25 PM |
| 15 | Listen up Scrotes! This is How Men THINK rape happens, vs how it ACTUALLY happens!Mine was "The creep" - I'd already said no, but it's like if he thought he kept trying I'd give in? I managed to push him away so many times but he just kept reaching back. (Right back to where he didnt have consent) I'll never understand it. How does having to force someone even make you feel like you're desirable? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/20 07:09 AM |
| 13 | Wait, so all those girls in relationships have mostly been with LVM? Mind is blownThis helps me feel better. I’m at a point where I feel like I have a lot to explain about being single for so long. or I don’t know how I’m going to be perceived for it if I ever start a new relationship. I haven’t had a relationship for 6 years and I’m 29. I’ve only had one “proper” bf and he treated me badly. I definitely wouldn’t put up with something like that again. which I think is part of why I’m so picky. But where even is a good guy I’d want to be with. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/20 06:22 AM |
| 17 | How to turn your FWB/fling into a HVM boyfriend!Agree. You’ll only look back and wish you didn’t look so dumb. You may already have done things to appear desperate to them, but it makes it so much worse if you cement it to them this way. Type it out a million times in your notes if you need. But don’t send. Believe me I’ve been there. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/02/20 11:02 PM |
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