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ashfinsawriter Archive

View 7 posts and 134 comments by ashfinsawriter on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

Because they're not allowed to express it in the same way, and they're not taught that abuse can happen to them. The trauma expresses itself differently. Relationship troubles, erectile dysfunction, substance abuse, latent suicidality, low confidence/low self esteem, depression, anxiety, etc. Also, I hate to say it but being a guy with CPTSD who has semi-recently come to the realization I was sexually abused by my own mother (albeit "mildly"/not full on rape), I strongly believe mindset can make…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates11/05/26 01:38 AM
6

Also, women watch a lot of porn too... I'm not sure it's okay to link directly since it's stats from the Hub, but if you look up the viewer statistics, the #1 most viewed category for women is Lesbian. In fact, several other categories explicitly sexualizing women are at the top of women's viewership, rather than watching men. There's also several countries where the MAJORITY of the viewership is from women. So the idea that women (especially unwittingly) provide the porn and men consume (or wor…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates06/09/25 02:36 PM
24

As a trans guy, this stuff about transphobia is 100% true and I've spoken to other trans people about it. Usually once I explain the logic, they agree tbh. When they don't, they quickly reveal themselves to be the kind of staunch feminist that believes misandry is impossible. Unfortunately the trans people who don't realize this are often also horrible about "infighting". Often the same types to silence trans men overall.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates13/08/25 10:25 PM
2

I'm also still extremely close friends with the girls I grew up with and they tell me everything. Also, I looked way older than I was due to my early puberty (and likely chronic health conditions) and matured mentally faster than most so I wasn't treated like a child anymore by the time I transitioned.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates23/05/25 07:36 PM
1

I never said they're unrelated, stop strawmanning me. Gender and sex aren't identical for everyone, and they're different concepts fundamentally. That's not the same as "completely unrelated". Here's an explanation of each for you: Sex: The physical characteristics of sexual differentiation. These can include primary sex characteristics (reproductive structures), and secondary sex characteristics (sexual dimorphism). These things are not binary by the way. Aside from major differences in sexual …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates18/04/25 05:37 AM
-5

Okay now that I've kick-started the "Cringe" chain I hope crops up, seriously, all of the research is against you. Trans people actually have brain differences from cis people, making them more like the gender they identify as. In addition, for trans people, quality of life is massively improved by transitioning (which wouldn't be true if it weren't legitimate) A final challenge: Try to define a woman in a way that includes all cis women and no trans women. I've yet to meet anyone who can. Edit:…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates17/04/25 01:40 AM
-3

Cringe
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates17/04/25 01:35 AM
2

Why are you continually pushing a point I've already agreed on? I already said multiple times that I agree outright quotas isn't the correct way to go about it. All I'm saying is that there's more to DEI (some of which is more valid than the part I've already agreed is bad) and that Trump's approach is a horrible one
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates15/04/25 03:52 PM
8

DEI actually DOES encompass punishing discrimination and encouraging fairness. Yes, outright quotas also exist and I completely agree are a problem. But this idea that any minority in a skilled position is a "DEI hire" that Trump and the like are pushing is just flat out bigotry. When they ban DEI, they're actually trying to ban what the acronym stands for- diversity, equity, and inclusion. They're literally preventing even talking about striving for these things outside of "DEI mandates" like y…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates14/04/25 05:55 PM
2

Oh I completely agree with you on that. But that "something done" isn't what Trump is doing
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates14/04/25 12:40 AM
16

DEI initiatives also give opportunities to men- racial minorities, men from smaller towns, LGBTQ+ men, disabled men, non-Christian men, etc. Also, DEI doesn't just mean having to fill some quota of minorities. It's a lot more complex than that. I'm not saying the DEI movement is flawless, but banning diversity, equity, and inclusion is NOT the answer. What the conservatives are doing isn't just fighting back against over-representation of underqualified women in relevant fields. They're just try…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates13/04/25 11:26 PM
50

Isn't this LEFT WING male advocates? Trump isn't good for men, don't get it twisted. He hurts absolutely everybody. It could even be argued that the way he's ruining the economy predominantly hurts men, since he's destroying industries dominated by men in particular (manufacturing, farming, etc) and in heteronormative relationships it's gonna be the man primarily responsible for the income too. Not to mention that the forceful deportation of even LEGAL immigrants, often to the wrong country, imp…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates13/04/25 05:36 PM
5

My 5'4 chronically ill mother beat my 5'11 ex-military father to the point of breaking bones in front of me when I was 15. When I tried to call the cops my mom gloated that she'd claim he was the aggressor and get him arrested. He begged me not to call under the same reasoning. It's not just kids. Aside from it absolutely being possible for women to be stronger than men, even if they're not, it doesn't matter if the technically stronger person can't defend themselves
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates17/02/25 07:07 PM
2

Male sexual abuse victim here, targeted by 4 women throughout my life- one being my own mother, and one other being a grown woman, and I was a minor for all 4. You could even argue for a 5th time when an elderly woman kissed me on the lips without consent when I was 14, but it didn't go further than kissing me. Any time I talk about this to anyone but my closest internal circle, they usually laugh or just praise me for getting so much female attention. For the kissing-only incident it was in ful…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates06/02/25 06:45 PM
2

I'm a trans man, and yep. I don't really feel safe anywhere because of this. Even in trans male communities themselves this sort of attitude is pervasive.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates13/01/25 09:36 AM
1

Yeah, I get that. I'd guess the main worry is that if this sub disappeared, there's no guaranteeing people could find the replacement again? Plus all the history and such. That'd be my assumption anyway.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates12/01/25 07:01 AM
2

Fair enough I suppose. I'm just trying to help
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates12/01/25 02:00 AM
2

Then don't hire that kind of mod/fire people who don't have a backbone? Make it clear from the start that taking risks is the point
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates11/01/25 11:03 PM
15

Honestly I think the invalidation of "just wanting to whine" should be addressed here. Talking about issues isn't "just wanting to whine". Spreading awareness IS a form of activism. There is value to just finding somewhere you belong, where you don't feel crazy for your opinions. It's emboldening. Although it's small, I've gotten a few people to be LWMAs themselves by introducing them to resources from this sub. That kind of thing does have a domino effect. I'm a trans man. This is the ONLY men'…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates11/01/25 06:02 PM
3

Trans man myself here, VERY not true. It just looks a little different - they want to subjugate us.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates28/12/24 06:31 AM
5

While this is true as far as public rhetoric, trans men actually face more violence: "Transgender women and men had higher rates of violent victimization (86.1 and 107.5 per 1,000 people, respectively)" https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/press/ncvs-trans-press-release/
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates28/12/24 06:28 AM
3

There are a lot of countries where it's legal to be lesbian but not to be gay. Sorry but having your identity literally outlawed just immediately defaults to being more oppressed than an identity that's legal, if you're playing comparisons like this Also gay men 1000% have to deal with corrective rape. But just like other rape, it's often not classified as such for men due to the persave "men always want it" idea. Men are also the primary receivers of conversion therapy which often involves sexu…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates21/12/24 08:24 PM
7

Trans man here and you're completely right about ftm communities. It's disgusting how far it can go- it even gets to the point of incredibly blatantly hatred of our own community, with a lot of trans guys lashing out at those of us who pass and/or have binary male identities (like me, who looks and feels like a regular dude- who just so happened to be born with a reproductive birth defect- which my own community often despises)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates21/12/24 08:15 PM
1

I mean, no? Just because there's a lot of straight pipes and wires doesn't mean plumbing and electrical systems wouldn't collapse without curved ones too.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates21/12/24 08:12 PM
12

The sad thing is this trope often also derives from emotional incest. A LOT of mothers fetishize their sons. Overattached "mama's boys" with "boy mom" mothers are victims most of the time, but everyone just belittles and mocks the victim. It makes it even harder for those men to detach when no one's acknowledging they've been manipulated and abused and everyone's being hostile to them, which makes their exploitative and predatory mothers' "love" seem even more appealing.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates17/12/24 05:53 PM
4

Trans man here who's also probably gay, but so ashamed of the sexuality piece I'm genuinely not sure if I'm ACTUALLY gay (could be ace but idk if that's just shame or if something is there, idk) Anyway, completely feel you here. My first time engaging with the LGBTQ+ community, I was like 14 and I went to an LGBTQ+ group. I was the only masculine person there, and the only person with he/him pronouns, most people were either trans women or nonbinary as well (a couple cis women iirc). They ate me…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates09/12/24 03:46 PM
1

Yeah, funny how often feminists and conservatives use the same arguments lol. "It's just a joke" is used to justify hate in multiple directions...
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates07/12/24 07:03 PM
1

I think it's really important to emphasize the fact that "punching up" is supposed to be about comedy Killing someone for their political opinion isn't comedy. "Joking" about it is rarely actually a joke either tbh Personally my stance is that "punching up" NEVER applies to demographics based on something you're born as, however, it can apply to the wealthy and powerful for instance (politicians and such). It's generally used for actually bad people, as well. That being said tbh I think there's …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates07/12/24 11:25 AM
2

Personally I usually just say I'm against sexism. Then start calling it out against men lol Unfortunately, I can't really use the label without risking losing my social support. I'm trans so I need that support just for basic survival and safety, especially since I'm in the US and y'know, the recent election
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates04/12/24 06:24 PM
1

Calling it dumb is unnecessarily harsh. Yes, you totally have a point- but it's not true of ALL women. There absolutely are lots of women who don't just get their pick of men, and of those women, the only ones who feel desperate like a lot of men do, also don't have friends (likely for the same reason)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates18/11/24 04:04 AM
6

Tbh the idea that the only social connection men should have is sexual relationships with women is, in my opinion, a huge part of the problem I'm not saying that (heterosexual) men don't need that. But the reason they feel so frantic and desperate for it is precisely because platonic bonds aren't valued for men Women get to have large support circles of family and friends. That's why they're not just as desperate. Women who are desperate to have a boyfriend are usually just as isolated in terms …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates17/11/24 07:14 PM
37

I saw like one guy on Twitter saying it Funny how a few insane dudes justifies attacking all men, but when there's an entire trend of "Kill all men", it's unfair to be upset... Although to be clear "Your body my choice" is stupid and it's fair to be upset at the individuals saying that and the circumstances causing them to do so. It's just not fair to take it out on other men
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates16/11/24 03:39 PM
7

The draft Over 90% of workplace deaths are male Majority of homeless are male Male mental health crisis (including the majority of suicides), which is exacerbated by everything else Male loneliness epidemic Lack of male support in mental health spaces (support groups not taking us seriously, therapists not taking us seriously, all of our problems are always blamed on ourselves or at best other men even if we're being abused by women or it's a situation where it's not really anyone's fault, we're…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates15/11/24 02:13 PM
1

Sorry for the late reply, didn't notice the notification. With the "some" clarification yeah, you're totally right. I missed that, apologies. But it's worth noting that it IS possible to get a trans person visually indistinguishable from a cis person (even genitals, though trans men will have functional differences). There's a lot more overlap than people usually realize in things like bones even for cis people. Even seasoned archeologists can't determine biological sex from a skeleton alone- wh…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates10/11/24 07:08 AM
3

About the passing thing, you're... Just wrong there. For example, my experience. I haven't been misgendered in 6+ years. People who already know I'm trans will literally forget, and be surprised all over again when I mention it (although ofc it clicks after a moment). When I come out to new people, they always first assume I'm transitioning to female, then when I explain I'm actually already transitioned, they take a lot of convincing to believe me. Last time I went on a date, when I came out it…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates07/11/24 06:50 PM
1

I responded at length to that comment. The problem isn't not being prepared to help, it's that I'm still learning how. To clarify what I meant with the statement you quoted (although I do mention this in the other reply to), in person I get kicked out of trans and otherwise progressive spaces because I don't look trans enough. I have just as much luck there as any cis guy. Online (where my physical masculinity is obscured) is the only place I really retain AFAB privilege, which I do use however …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates07/11/24 04:01 PM
3

Oh believe me, I talk about men's rights wherever I can, despite frequent pushback from my own community. Unfortunately I can't really get away with it in person, because I pass so well that I get accused of being cis. I actually have a lot of ideas for things I'd do for men if I could, but I'm just a college student who's struggling to survive at all. One thing I'd love to do one day if I ever have the funds is to open a men's domestic/sexual abuse shelter, then when feminists inevitably push b…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates07/11/24 03:46 PM
3

Yeah, it's really lonely being a trans guy- especially one who does pass, like myself, because that's when the left gets really hateful. Even within the FtM community, there's a lot of infighting drama... Honestly I mostly just do my best to kindly but firmly not accept misandry. Especially when I'm anonymously participating in leftist spaces, where no one sees my beard lol
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates06/11/24 07:05 PM
22

As a trans man, we don't see the same accusations in the mainstream, but in day to day life, misandry is still strongly against us. It's exceedingly isolating being a trans man, because the right hates us for being trans and the left hates us for being men :( We need to stand together- leftist cis men, and trans people going in any direction- to fight misandry but honestly on a practical level I never know what to do lol
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates06/11/24 05:48 PM
1

I was utterly appalled when I saw it
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates03/11/24 06:41 AM
5

I think I saw that post. Somewhere in a thread (since they don't allow non feminists as the parent reply) I pointed out how underreported male failed attempts are, because men by in large don't have support systems to check on them, and even professionals don't take men seriously. It's wild how upset feminists usually get when in discussions about rape, where hypothetical victims are being referred to as female, men point out that the discussion should be gender neutral because men can be victim…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates02/11/24 08:08 PM
8

"They wouldn't last a single day as a woman" Funny that. I'm a trans guy, I lasted years as a girl/woman. It was easier. I'm not saying all women have it easier than all men, but by in large, it was easier. Fewer expectations, less judgement, more personal agency with less consequences, more people who cared about me without being personally close to me... Conversely I don't think people like THIS would last long living as a man lol (though unlike them, I'm not generalizing to all women. Honestl…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates30/10/24 11:46 AM
2

Exactly my experience...
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates29/10/24 04:10 PM
9

Personally, pretty rarely. Honestly cishet men are actually pretty lovely in my experience. Just like any other demographic, there's bad apples, but I try to avoid those individuals. In my experience it's a bit easier to spot them though? Like, if a cishet guy is homophobic, he doesn't pretend he's an ally usually. By avoiding those people I've found myself knowing lots of accepting dudes. Generally I come out, any discussion about relationships switch to talking about me getting a boyfriend ins…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates28/10/24 05:07 PM
13

Most? Absolutely not. Probably more often than straight men, but nah, most gay guys are just regular dudes. They might be more open about expressing a more gentle/feminine side though since being accused of being gay isn't insulting lol
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates28/10/24 03:28 PM
11

Those groups aren't mutually exclusive, so, hard to say. Cis vs trans doesn't seem to make a ton of difference in my experience though. It seems to be more about the other person's own orientation. If they're LGBTQ+ and primarily or exclusively attracted to women they're the most homophobic, with women being worse about it than men. Straight women next, then straight men, and finally other men who are into men usually aren't homophobic for reasons I'm sure you can guess lol Nonbinary people seem…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates28/10/24 03:27 PM
7

You called it lol
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates28/10/24 02:03 PM
32

I've been thinking about this a long time, especially when so many lesbians claim they have it worse than gay men. The only thing I think that could've been added here is hate crime statistics- gay men are significantly more likely to face violence, even in areas where homosexuality has been decriminalized, than any other sexuality I've also noticed as a gay man myself a lot of intercommunity discrimination. I've actually faced more prejudice from other LGBTQ+ people than from cishet people pers…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates28/10/24 11:12 AM
7

Misandry being the primary root of transphobia is something I absolutely agree with tbh and you laid it out pretty well. I do think there's some misogyny mixed in as well (particularly for trans men- remember, transphobes don't respect the actual gender- especially with things like sexualizing breasts while arguing against top surgery) but the driving force is misandry. If men weren't treated as inherently dangerous, trans people wouldn't be seen as scary. Pretty simple. it even changes the way …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates15/10/24 07:29 PM
40

Trans man here. This is exactly why I'm not a feminist. I feel pretty ostracized from the FtM community as a result tbh, although the community here on Reddit is usually alright- but I have noticed that the further into transition a trans guy gets, the less likely he is to be a feminist. I've seen a lot of people insist it's misogyny, but in my experience, it's because the more we're seen as men, the more abuse we face, and the harder it is to cling to an ideology that fundamentally hates our ge…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates14/10/24 08:01 AM
1

Honestly I think the definition of objectification is really nebulous in the first place and too vague to define as good or bad. I myself got to the point where I saw all sexuality as inherently objectification and thus inherently abuse. It was an obsession that fueled deep self hatred that's damaged my sexuality potentially permanently. I literally can't experience attraction anymore despite not being asexual because I get such an immediate and intense reflex of self disgust at "objectifying" p…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates06/10/24 06:09 PM
10

Other people have given much better responses for general purposes, so I'll say what I personally would say: Well, as a man who has been alone in a room full of women only for them to viciously insult me, threaten me, and eventually kick me out despite the fact that it was an LGBTQ+ space that claimed to welcome anyone, I'd be very nervous in a room full of strange women. I'd also probably talk about how one of my friends is a woman who typically hangs out with men more than other women lol, and…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates25/09/24 03:26 PM
6

My opinion based on personal experiences is that modern society treats male sexuality as something that only exists to serve women- and otherwise, it's demonized. Men are expected to focus entirely on a woman's pleasure in bed, nevermind that he's often doing all the work for his own as well Male sexual expression is treated as creepy and predatory unless it's in a way that serves women Men are demonized in the heterosexual BDSM space, with dominants being seen as dangerous and misogynistic and …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates12/09/24 06:55 PM
2

Yet ironically, I swear every single time I bring up male victims in isolation there's a swarm of women talking about it being a women's issue. Even though when I bring it up, it's usually in the context of literally my own experience (so they're silencing a victim directly, which is supposedly a no-go) and unlike a lot of the times I see female victims discussed- where it immediately turns into a gendered issue claiming all women are in danger of all men- I never claim that women are evil for h…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates09/09/24 05:10 PM
11

I'm all for women's rights- This sub, as far as I understand, support's women's rights as a whole. We're not going after women's rights. We're going after what should really be called the female supremacist movement at this point. Not every person who refers to themselves as feminist, or uses the term feminist, means female supremacy- but a big enough chunk of them do, that their talking points have to be considered when discussing feminism.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates08/09/24 08:43 AM
2

Thank you for this post! I always try to remember to clarify that I don't mean everyone, just a specific subset I'm trying to address, when I make a statement about a demographic's view because the nuance is important
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates07/09/24 04:45 PM
3

Trans man here, and yep, I noticed this years ago via personal experience. I think that when evaluating transmisogyny and transmisandry people often forget that 'phobes literally don't see us as our identities. It's ironic, how often transmisandry is dismissed because transmisogyny is targeted at women- but, ironically, those women are facing misandry Even misandry itself is only taken seriously when it's aimed at a woman. Anyway, you pretty much covered it. It's honestly kinda reassuring to see…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates06/09/24 08:46 AM
4

I've always found the catcalling thing fascinating tbh. I only know two people it's happened to, one of which I was there for the incident. The time I wasn't there was my best friend. She's a woman. She told me about it, and said that she honestly just found it funny. She's a very confident person. The time I was there was with a very close male friend. A whole car of women were catcalling him- he was absolutely thrilled. Seriously made his entire month, and he still sometimes brings it up as a …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates05/09/24 06:08 PM
1

If you're deliberately photographing them (unless it's something like evidence of them committing a crime) I would personally consider that creepy. If you're photographing something else and they just happen to be in the shot, that's not creepy.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates05/09/24 05:44 PM
17

As a trans man who came out very young (12, got on testosterone at 13) and passed pretty much immediately, I think a lot of AFAB people don't realize just how bad it is to be perceived as AMAB. I went to an LGBTQ+ youth group when I was 14 or so and was the only person who didn't LOOK like I was assigned female. I was treated horribly, literally told I "looked like the oppressor", despite me explaining I was trans and gay they wouldn't have it. The adults did nothing and were dismissive of me, I…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates30/08/24 05:30 PM
25

This is true about most issues, but the heteronormativity in this discussion kinda proves your point. They don't care if men are lonely, because the solution is ALWAYS to go meet women. Single, lonely gay men aren't part of this discussion. Ace men who don't seek out sex at all and aro men who don't seek out romance at all aren't part of this discussion. Hell, straight men who just don't feel ready for a relationship but would benefit from more platonic friendships aren't part of this discussion…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates27/08/24 01:46 PM
1

This is extremely frustrating, both the obvious double standards and the fact that cis people like this undermine trans rights, ugh. Trans rights to legally register as the gender they are wouldn't be a problem if we actually had gender equality- if men were already tried equally to women, as they should be, there'd be no point
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates25/08/24 02:51 AM
1

Male physical advantage isn't a myth, but post-transition trans female advantage is a myth. In fact, recent research may indicate the opposite: https://www.forbes.com/sites/lindseyedarvin/2024/04/25/transgender-athletes-could-be-at-a-physical-disadvantage-new-research-shows/
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates11/08/24 10:35 AM
2

I'm not surprised they'd say that tbh. Sexual abuse of men is horribly underplayed and treated like it's not a big deal. It IS a big deal. No one deserves to be abused like that
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates07/08/24 03:33 AM
3

Because that'd require acknowledging that a group of men have something worse than a group of women
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates07/08/24 03:32 AM
2

It's wild because the homophobic crowd still is more against gay men than anyone else as well. I understand the argument that "oh they're only more accepting of lesbians because they're fetishizing them" or whatever, but I'm sorry, I'd rather be fetishized (which btw, I am, as a trans man, so I speak from experience!) than beat up. Both are bad though of course Also, no one seems to wanna address now gay men are fetishized by (usually) women. I've literally had times where I've been sexually har…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates06/08/24 07:06 PM
1

I don't think it's all doctors, I've definitely had some who were in it because they genuinely wanna help people. But yeah, lots of them are on power trips. You'll find that in any position of authority tbh
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates06/08/24 06:57 PM
2

Yes, exactly! This is why I don't feel comfortable in LGBTQ+ spaces anymore. I'm likely gay as well and it's so frustrating having (usually lesbian tbh, but it does vary) people tell me that I'm misogynistic for "rejecting women". I don't hate women just because I'm not one and don't want to fuck one. I've even had trans women call me misogynistic for transitioning the other direction, like wtf?
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates06/08/24 05:56 PM
2

It definitely happens a lot to women as well (example: IUDs being inserted without anaesthetic... I don't have a cervix anymore but the idea is still horrific to think about, it's VERY pain sensitive), but I feel like (especially young) men are likely to be pegged as drug seeking For example, when I did go to the ER at one point, my finger was paralyzed, swollen to 3x its usual size, and in extreme agony. Turned out to be a really, REALLY bad cellulitis infection. Now, for perspective, I had per…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates06/08/24 05:34 PM
2

I'm glad to hear it! :)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates06/08/24 05:26 PM
2

Thank you for being welcoming :)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates06/08/24 04:30 PM
2

Usually I just visit my GP. I have experienced medical neglect, however, when that happens I usually just "suck it up" lol. I live in the US, so I can't afford emergency room visits unless I'm legitimately dying or worrying about losing an appendage or something (although that has happened). Doing that ("sucking it up") has lead to long term health consequences though unfortunately.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates06/08/24 04:30 PM
1

Honestly, I think it's moreso that the extremes of morality are rare. And, while modern Western societies are being skewed more and more in the direction of women having an unfair amount of power and privilege, let's not forget that's a fairly recent phenomena. There's a very good chance there's been female Hitlers in terms of innate morality, but who never had the power to actually end up leading a genocide. Conversely, plenty of incredibly noble and heroic women haven't really been allowed in …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/08/24 01:19 AM
32

I've noticed this for a long time. If a woman supports men, she's a pick me. If a man does it, he's a misogynist (even though it's possible to support men and women at the same time. Hi, hello, it's me, a person who supports human rights and fair treatment across the board). Sometimes it's even treated like holding women accountable for their own actions is misogyny. Hell, because of that perception I feel the need to clarify that I'm referring to situations where women are abusive, and that wha…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates31/07/24 01:38 PM
3

In my experience, kindness is individual. Radicals are rarely kind individuals, because they need a degree of callousness to go to such extremism. Ultimately imo the primary oppression is just based on class. The rich oppress the poor. Then the poor fight among ourselves for scraps because we've been conditioned to. But I digress Regarding your last statement, don't be afraid to explore your identity! Just be aware that being trans isn't about becoming an "easier" gender (if that were the case, …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates30/07/24 05:48 PM
1

To be fair, if I hear "she fucked him", I'm picturing a situation with a strap-on. Which, good for them if that's what they're into, but still. When I hear "X fucked Y" I'm assuming it means "X penetrated Y". Maybe that's just me, though, and it could have something to do with me usually being in gay environments lol I do agree however that language like "they had sex" or "they fucked" being more prominent would be beneficial. It SHOULD be a mutual decision, and thus should be expressed mutually…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates30/07/24 05:42 PM
2

I've heard of a few more cases as well- it definitely needs to be studied! I actually found out just last night about a paradoxical health improvement from increasing my T dose. Taking artificial T is known for raising RBC to worrying levels, right? Well, when I was taking a low dose that put me at a testosterone level too low for male expectations, I was experiencing that. I got results from a blood test yesterday since raising my dose and my RBC had actually dropped back into range. Nothing el…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates30/07/24 01:14 PM
12

I think what a lot of people don't realize is that even just being accused can ruin your life. I've heard so many cases where innocent men got accused, proved their innocence, and still lost their careers, their homes, many personal relationships, and even cases like this where they get punished without usual recoupment for false convictions: https://www.nj.com/politics/2019/01/an-innocent-man-was-forced-to-register-as-a-sex-offender-for-decades-what-does-nj-owe-him.html In a "he said she said" …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates29/07/24 03:54 PM
4

As a trans man, I find it absolutely insane that people will circumcized their boys then turn around and say that WE'RE the ones wanting to mutilate children. Circumcision for any reason other than true medical necessity is mutilation of babies, period. Also I totally agree about men + women friendships to be normalized. Platonic close relationships between people of differing groups is the #1 way to promote genuine support between said groups
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates27/07/24 03:19 PM
8

People would be assed as individuals and so long as those individuals weren't actively hurting people, would be accepted for who they are and treated equitably. Men, women, all races, cisgender, transgender, all sexualities, neurotypical, neurodivergent, different physical abilities, would all be treated actually fairly. I say equitably instead of equally because disabled people do legitimately need extra accomodations and they're included in this world. But the point is, anyone should have perm…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates27/07/24 03:17 PM
3

You're right that there's never been heterophobia that's on the same level of damaging as homophobia but that doesn't make the term inaccurate. It's still an issue on an individual and social circle basis. I'm LGBTQ+ myself and I've absolutely seen people who would happily beat up someone just for being straight. It needs to be nipped in the bud now if we want true equality.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates27/07/24 02:53 PM
1

Yeah, unfortunately that's just how we're treated. I hope it's able to change but it's the reality for now. I've already faced that concept of being in the wrong no matter what, but I'm lucky that it's never gone so far as authorities getting involved, only petty drama type stuff. So far.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates27/07/24 06:42 AM
1

Yeah that's why I ended the conversation. Glad to drop some sources beforehand tbh lol. I know I'm being true to myself and to science, some people are just beyond reason unfortunately
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates27/07/24 06:41 AM
2

Okay so you're fully just transphobic and spreading misinformation (not a single source goes crazy after I had so many, lol), got it. You're literally arguing for conversion therapy. Seeing as you jump straight to immature personal attacks (like calling me delusional), and you spout lies without even pretending to have actual evidence, I'm not gonna bother continuing this conversation.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates26/07/24 08:06 PM
1

Well it's far from my first day now, but yeah, it was a bit of a rough adjustment at first
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates26/07/24 04:29 PM
1

Oh are you saying you also believe trans people aren't really trans? In that case, I will explain how being trans is essentially an intersex condition of the brain. MRIs of the brain have proven that sex differences in the brain exist and that for trans people, they don't line up with cis people: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41386-020-0666-3 So yes, there is a literal observable difference in the brain for trans people. It's also been very thoroughly proven that transitioning is the correct …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates26/07/24 03:20 PM
-1

My argument isn't about whether or not you like certain scents. You're not obligated to feel any particular way when it comes to personal attraction even if you COULD control it, which as you said, you can't. My argument is that a trans person on HRT smells identical to if they were cis of the gender they identify as. I'm basing this on scientific evidence (scent is driven by hormones, so HRT would change it) and anecdotal evidence from others (trans people and their partners report online all t…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates26/07/24 09:19 AM
0

Technically, although I said pheromones, the studies I linked only discuss final scent, so yeah maybe it's not just pheromones (for example it could also be stuff like changing the chemical composition of sweat influencing skin microbiome). Regardless, hormones do control how masculine or feminine someone's natural body odor is
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates26/07/24 08:59 AM
3

Another aspect about the sexuality point: Any man who has experienced sexual trauma. Huge swaths of society refuse to accept that sexual trauma even EXISTS for men. They insist that, because they see men as sex crazed freaks, then they must have secretly wanted it, particularly if the perpetrator is female. Men exhibiting symptoms of sexual trauma are told those symptoms detract from their status as a man, and even refused help.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates26/07/24 08:12 AM
-1

Pheromones come from hormones, so a trans woman on HRT will smell female: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6158529/ https://www.livescience.com/28812-women-prefer-smell-of-manly-guys.html These are both from a heteronormative lens but it's still proof that female and male scents both come from hormone levels. Trans people also report HRT changing their scent, including the scent of genitals. Changes in body odor are even listed as effects: https://www.healthline.com/health/transgende…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates26/07/24 08:07 AM
2

My personal opinion is that both engaging in demands and withdrawing aren't really the healthiest responses. Bringing up problems with the idea of your partner solving them isn't fair, but completely ignoring problems means the problems remain unsolved. This isn't a romantic relationship, but my best friend is a woman and we're extremely close. We definitely instinctively follow these similar patterns, she's more likely to bring up problems and I'm more likely to try to ignore them. In order to …
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates26/07/24 07:32 AM
1

Yeah, thank you. I think it helps me that I don't want to date women so I don't particularly care about being attractive to them, and I'm not really insecure about my height on a personal level, but it still stings sometimes to see what people say and sadly I know I'm not taken as seriously because of it
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates26/07/24 06:58 AM
3

I think a lot of people are bitter and resentful of being treated badly by people within the "oppressive majority" groups- and while those emotions are fundamentally very fair, the problem is that it's discriminatory to take it out on an entire demographic rather than the hurtful individuals. It's literally the same mentality you see in reverse that gets criticized. If someone has an abusive mother or ex girlfriend or something, is it okay to see all women as manipulative and cruel? Absolutely n…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates26/07/24 06:53 AM
1

If they're brave enough to admit their transphobia, they think that trans women are transitioning because of sexual predation of women, which is just... Deeply not true and reflects on how they view men, because they don't see trans people as the gender they actually are. Ironically, I've also often seen the argument that "No man would want to be a woman because men see women as inferior" (which isn't how being trans actually works, it's not about "wanting to switch genders", it's not a consciou…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates26/07/24 06:40 AM
2

You nailed it tbh. The vast majority of feminists I've met treat us all like we're wealthy politicians- rich and entitled, with a vested interest in keeping them down. Meanwhile, most guys I've met are struggling to get by, while actually being thrilled at seeing women succeed, because they don't WANT to see anyone suffer. Sure, there's gonna be bitter guys, there's gonna be misogynistic guys, but when you're talking about nearly 50% of the population you're gonna get bad people in there too, it…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates26/07/24 06:31 AM
2

Yep, I've absolutely observed that difference
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates26/07/24 06:18 AM
3

Thank you :) Yeah, tbh the way society treats men feels dehumanizing. We're expected to be cogs in the machine, just working our whole lives to provide for others, to be robots without our own feelings or needs.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates25/07/24 04:06 PM
3

Exactly. It really is about the individual. I don't think there's anything innate in gender that increases or decreases the likelihood of being an abuser, although society can enforce gendered standards that might make it seem that way (and can of course just lie- the domestic violence rates are far more equal than people think)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates25/07/24 03:54 PM
3

YES you nailed it! When I say I want people to be an ally to me as a trans person you know damn well I'm also ready to go to bat for their rights. It drives me crazy when I see other trans people degrading cis people as a whole. Talk about transphobes, sure, they're actively hurting us, but the vast majority of cis people are perfectly fine, and if we want respect we need to be respectful as well (unless an individual is actively being hurtful ofc but again, that's very far from everyone)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates25/07/24 03:51 PM
4

I think it depends on the feminists but yeah, many still don't listen. Tbh the more feminine you look/earlier in transition you are, the more likely they are to listen, which is why I have a lot more success online than in person (though even that rate is low because they often just don't want to listen to anything outside their echo chambers)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates25/07/24 03:45 PM
3

I think a lot of people conflate high testosterone in cis women with high testosterone in trans men, which are totally different beasts. For one, if there's high testosterone in cis women, odds are there's something medically wrong, which could be causing other problems (for instance, insulin resistance with PCOS). For two, the levels are probably different, the amount of T I have in my system is completely normal for a man but for a cis woman it'd be incredibly sky high even for conditions like…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates25/07/24 03:43 PM
1

You should definitely see an endocrinologist tbh, I really hope they can figure it out! Having the wrong hormone levels feels pretty bad. You're right afaik that adipose tissue is hormonally active and increases estrogen levels, but I wouldn't be surprised if there's something else going on too, so it's worth getting checked out (unless you're able to lose weight and you end up feeling totally better I suppose, but even then tbh it's worth getting checked out with how long those things can take)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates25/07/24 03:34 PM
2

Cured severe anemia (even though it never stopped my period) and reduced the severity of my autoimmune neuromuscular disease (though I only learned/confirmed it existed fairly recently), along with massively helping my mental health (eliminated paranoid delusions, reduced anxiety and depression substantially, cut down on mood swings a lot, etc)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates25/07/24 03:28 PM
4

Thank you for saying it! As a society I think we're largely focusing on the wrong issues tbh
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 07:50 PM
11

If it's not actually required to do the job, my argument is that it shouldn't be required for men, either. I'm also referring to the identical position- if you want "the capability of the different gender" it'd be a different role that better utilizes that different strength. Ultimately everyone is different aside from their gender anyway. I've known women who are very physically strong and men who are amazing social problem solvers or whatever, honestly find a gendered stereotype and you'll fin…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 07:48 PM
18

Although it sucks that it revealed their misandry (especially my mom's) my parents 100% made the right choice. The study referenced by people like Peterson was poorly performed, as it counted people who didn't respond on follow up as "desisting", when in reality they essentially just left the study. Consider that the regret rate for gender affirming procedures is less than 1%: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8099405/ Also, here's statistics on detransitioners: https://www.ncbi.nlm.n…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 07:39 PM
11

The only time I've really been in danger in public was broad daylight when someone tried to mug me lol. But still, I don't like not being able to see the ground if I did have to run or something. I actually do quite like the night outside on the rare occasion I'm out there, though. It's very peaceful and even with all the light pollution where I live the night sky is quite beautiful.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 07:24 PM
21

Yes, she is. She also believes that all men are awful. She goes as far as to say my empathy comes from "the female side of my brain" and gets deeply offended when I tell her that's not really how it works and that plenty of cis men are deeply empathetic (and plenty of women aren't). She literally believes all good traits come from women and men who aren't horrible monsters are just "in touch with their feminine side", ugh. It's exhausting and disheartening Trans men have benefitted from the move…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 07:23 PM
8

True. Though, I more meant a traitor to the LGBTQ+ community and the left as a whole tbh, as far as trans men go. Or to women as a whole Tbh those sorts of feminists remind me of the far right crying about being "silenced" while simultaneously getting constant media attention and controlling much of the legal system and government
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 07:19 PM
13

Honestly, so long as someone isn't blatantly disrespecting me (aka: be civil), I'm more open than most to have very honest discussions about being trans. I don't pretend I'm 100% identical to a cis man in every possible way (although I do think I "feel like a man" in exactly the same way. I actually don't exactly identify as "trans" per say, moreso I see myself as a guy with a complex reproductive-system birth defect, ha). I have the female portion of my upbringing and, well, I don't have a peni…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 07:16 PM
7

I'm sure you've helped more than you realize by being there like that! You're appreciated :)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 07:02 PM
10

Yeah, everyone definitely won't have the same experience. I think it's a mixture of local culture (the balance of misogyny vs misandry does vary by community) and as you said, appearance. I'm a 4'11 guy who sadly is losing my hair very young, but I've been told I've got a nice face? Idk, I think I'm pretty average looking, just very short lol (I call myself travel sized). Despite being so tiny, I've definitely had people see me as dangerous. At one point I was going to have lunch with a couple (…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 07:01 PM
16

Haha, the irony in the fact that I absolutely don't feel safe alone at night still (I don't know any self defense lol)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 06:53 PM
5

Thank you :)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 06:51 PM
7

Thank you. Don't worry, I'm used to it, I've had to learn to deal with it. I'm relieved it's not the majority, it means a lot when people are supportive and I do feel overall welcome :)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 06:51 PM
11

Oh hey, nice to see someone else in the same position (though I wish we weren't all struggling with society's treatment)! I totally agree that there are absolutely feminist issues that are completely correct in their stance (reproductive rights is a very clear cut example) but I just can't agree with the entire label of feminist. Personally I like to call myself an egalitarian. I'm for everyone's rights
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 06:50 PM
15

Unless everyone you meet is checking everyone's pants to see whether they have a penis, I'm sure they'd all treat me identically to other men. Men's issues aren't in their chromosomes, it's in how society treats them. I didn't speak on anything I haven't actually experienced myself I wouldn't say my opinion is MORE important than a cis man's, but it's a fresh perspective that I hoped might be helpful to some.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 06:47 PM
8

I'm glad you were able to feel what I was going for :)
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 06:44 PM
11

My mom definitely ran my household, although I did grow up in the "Bible Belt" US south, out in the country (the sort of place where I heard gunshots regularly and thought "they'd be hunting me if they knew my identity"). My family was pretty isolated due to our left leaning political beliefs combined with my mother being controlling and frankly abusive (My dad's a DV victim but we all know he could never report it safely) Again, I really am sorry that the way I put things was hurtful. I hope yo…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 06:40 PM
10

I hope we can!
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 06:35 PM
12

I find the oppression hierarchy... Honestly, I just think it's fundamentally inaccurate in how it's set up. For one, the very most important thing is wealth. A wealthy queer trans black person is going to have it better than a broke cishet white man. The other, is it's really just too complicated to break it down into tiers the way they do. I have many trans friends and honestly? I've faced the least trans-based discrimination of all of them, due to transitioning so young I can go stealth in day…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 06:34 PM
11

I think more trans men would talk about it if doing so weren't seen as being a "traitor", but sadly it is, so a lot of us are scared. And thank you for the well wishes!
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 06:17 PM
14

You're so right about the moral debt omg. People act like men owe women for the things their ancestors did/went through, but it's just not true. There's nothing we can do to undo the suffering those women went through- and it's not our faults what other guys do now, either. Men need to be regarded and respected as individuals. I find it very telling that the phrase "not all men" is treated so laughably.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 06:15 PM
29

The reality that cis men aren't listened to really sucks, I do my best to use my position to help tbh. At least online where it's not clear how masculine I am physically, I'm sometimes able to get people to think twice about misandrist stances and statements (although it's pretty tough and a lot of people just don't listen). It's a similar deal being a trans guy who passes in transphobic communities, I'll sorta use my appearance as an "in" to dispel some of the misinformation around us. Thank yo…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 06:10 PM
14

Honestly, my hope is just that we're able to make things better for the future. I spend a decent amount of my time trying to help people where I can with exactly this in mind. I don't do any large scale activism, but I still try to make an impact- one example is when I made friends as a teen with a very sheltered, religious girl who was all the 'phobics, but I could see she was a kind, loving person in her nature. I ended up showing her that her parents were wrong, people like me are just regula…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 06:05 PM
17

Totally agree about the importance of remembering history, but swinging the pendulum in the opposite direction isn't the solution- we need it to settle in the middle Unfortunately, men gathering in protest is deemed a violent mob. Men are (correctly) more afraid of police brutality.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 05:55 PM
20

Very true! Hormones do play a big role, but there's so many assumptions and misinformation and societal expectations attached to them that few people actually understand them well. For instance, I can speak from experience that the menstrual cycle can cause massive mood disturbances. Does that mean women are invalid in how they feel just because of where they are in their cycle at the time? Absolutely not! Does that mean women can't be rational on their period? Again, absolutely not! But it's ju…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 05:52 PM
29

Thank you, this sub seems to align very well with my beliefs so I'm glad to be here
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 04:58 PM
28

I understand why affirmative action stuff was started but at this point it's obsolete and even counterintuitive. We want equality, which should mean equal standards! Providing financial aide should be based on income, not inborn demographic, and job qualifications should be equal. Playing favourites absolutely breeds resentment- my own little "conspiracy theory" is that that's essentially the point, by directing the common people to fight each other based on gender, race, etc, while pretending t…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 04:57 PM
47

I always find the difference between directions of transition interesting and sad tbh. It's definitely easier physically (except for bottom surgery) to transition to male, but socially... It's a hot mess. Trans women definitely get more outspoken hate (which I'll be revisiting shortly), but also more support within the community... But what no one talks about is that actually, statistically, trans men face more violence: https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/press/ncvs-trans-press-release/ (I d…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 04:52 PM
37

The thing I find wild about gender roles is how, in progressive spaces at least, women are celebrated for embodying either of them, while men are shamed for embodying either of them. The feminine man is treated as weak, the masculine man is treated as toxic. Meanwhile the feminine woman and the masculine women are both powerful (although there are some sects even in feminism which shame feminine women as well, which is... Odd... Yet still, they tend to degrade masculine men regardless) Ultimatel…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 04:34 PM
109

I'm glad most responses have been positive, I responded to that one and hope it clarified that's not what I was trying to do Completely agree about the dichotomy of "Men can't understand women, but somehow women are believed in understanding men". Ultimately I think it stems from this idea that women are inherently empathetic and men aren't. Which absolutely isn't true, empathy levels are very individual and actually can be changed via practice imo (I also happen to be autistic and empathy is so…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 04:24 PM
50

Afaik, excess testosterone also gets converted into estrogen, doesn't it? Hence why people who take too much can actually end up with excess feminization. Correct me if I'm wrong- I'm not a med student myself, I just love biology and medicine :) Honestly at this point I'd go as far as to say there's straight up female privilege. Yours isn't the only profession where women have a lower bar to clear. I remember learning a few years ago that women in professions like firefighting and police don't n…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 04:14 PM
34

I'm really sorry that it came off that way- it was meant to be supportive, in the sense of "hey, I basically come from the other side and I saw everything you talk about is real and valid" Also, as I said, I came out as 12. As a child whose every move was controlled by a very feminist (very close to "KAM" level tbh) mother of course I was poisoned against men as a preteen. So yeah I couldn't empathize as an actual child being fed with deeply anti-male biased information every day. My mother is H…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates24/07/24 04:01 PM
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