balanceofcatastrophe Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
22	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more!	Feminism	balanceofcatastrophe	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 02:15 AM
3	The Problem with False Accusations and Sexual Assault/Rape Trials	False Accusation	balanceofcatastrophe	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 04:55 AM

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
5	I am once again asking the feminists who lurk here a question: Why do you keep on justifying misandrist values/opinions by other feminists, then keep on insisting that feminism is for men too? What is gynomorphism fallacy? I've never heard of the term and it sounds interesting. Thanks in advance	/r/MensRights	27/03/21 08:30 PM
1	Being friends with a woman... Yeah, of course. Just telling you the truth <3	/r/MensRights	01/03/21 05:50 PM
11	Being friends with a woman... As cliche as it is to say, you truly aren't alone. Being falsely accused is absolutely, completely traumatic for many people. It can feel and actually be live-ruining. Not to mention that being abused, abandoned, belittled etc by feminists and women alike is just as awful. A lot of people's triggers are not considered "politically correct", and that's okay. If you feel uncomfortable around women because of trauma and because of the horrific experiences you've had with them, that's valid. (As lon…	/r/MensRights	28/02/21 10:35 PM
19	Feminist in a science sub-reddit claims that men are physically bigger and stronger than women because 'of an innate desire to rape' ! At first glance, yes, it definitely seems like an oxymoron, but it's a facet of the BDSM community if you're interested in learning more. It's a catch-all term for sexual assault/abuse/rape fantasies and roleplays by two or more consenting adults. Key word is roleplay. The adults who are involved in this and actually do it with genuine consent may have systems set in place to ensure that all participants are comfortable. For example, discussing beforehand about how to notify the other partner th…	/r/MensRights	25/02/21 05:40 PM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Alright, cool, thank you	/r/MensRights	25/02/21 04:11 AM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Then he gets ridiculed by her, and fucked over with divorce, once she finds a better one? How does a couple agreeing to perform unconventional gender roles for the family because it might benefit them ultimately lead to divorce, ridicule, and finding a "better one"?	/r/MensRights	25/02/21 04:11 AM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Wait, what are you referencing/talking about? /gen	/r/MensRights	25/02/21 04:08 AM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! while excluding any real solution of the issue for affected men. What solution do you think is best? Of course, I understand that's a big question that might deserve a nuanced, concise answer, but I'd like to learn more to avoid trying to help men in a patronizing, utterly unhelpful way.	/r/MensRights	25/02/21 04:06 AM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! This is a serious problem in itself. Our emotions are as intimate as female sexuality. You have no right to "encourage", especially if you are female, and especially while you are in a relationship. If he closes off from you, YOU are, quite probably, part of the problem. Or at least, just not good enough to attain privilege of knowing his emotions. I believe you've misunderstood what I meant. My definition of "encourage" is not the same as forcing men, or anyone for that matter, to show their em…	/r/MensRights	25/02/21 04:04 AM
2	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Right, her TedTalk was the one that got me interested in all of this.	/r/MensRights	25/02/21 03:56 AM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Personally i find people who believe in the feminist religion of patriarchy but not protest just as bad as the ones that dye their hair blue and are all in your face about it. Absolutely. It almost seems as if the big difference between 'radical' and 'normal' feminism is the fact that the radicals would act more on their beliefs. Sure, the radicals might be the hardcore group I wouldn't say there is such a thing as "normal" feminism, nor do I necessarily believe that radical feminism is the only…	/r/MensRights	24/02/21 05:00 AM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! I don't agree with all of the ideology, but that just gives me more of a chance to talk to more men who are involved in MGTOW. Thanks for explaining! I appreciate it!	/r/MensRights	24/02/21 04:56 AM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Thank you for shedding light on the issues that are involved in feminism. As an AFAB non binary person who can't always understand what it's like to be a man in these situations, it's so important to talk about these problematic, awful feminists so that people like me, and people in general can empathize with the issues of men.	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 06:02 PM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! However, MGTOW puts into perspective, that you don't need women. You dont need the baggage, you don't need to lose all your money. It puts self in front of others, the same idea when girl talk and they say "you need to find you and be alone for a while, and be OK with yourself" Could you tell me more about MGTOW and what the base of it is aside from that? I've heard the acronym here and there and am interested in finding out more about it. As for everything else you said, I pretty much agree wit…	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 05:55 PM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Absolutely, I could agree with that	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 05:51 PM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! For sure!	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 05:51 PM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! I don't think I have much to add to the current debate except to say that you may be open to criticism for borrowing from the ideas of radical feminism while distancing yourself from it. Sure thing! I haven't researched patriarchal theory too much, so I don't doubt that I have more to learn about radical feminism and how to debunk it. Would you agree to any extent? I'm always careful when comparing discrimination on the basis of race to discrimination on the basis of gender and/or sex, because…	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 05:50 PM
2	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! But that doesn't mean that we live in a patriarchy, just like the problems that disproportionately affect men doesn't make our society a matriarchy. I've never thought of it like this! Thank you, that makes a lot of sense. Are there any ideologies/theories that contradict and debunk the patriarchy theory? That would be interesting to read about. Feminist pointlessly gender everything, domestic abuse is now gendered in a lot of the western world. In the US there is such a thing as 'the Duluth m…	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 05:42 PM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Yup, thank you! There's also this PDF on the types of feminism if y'all want more insight. Sorry if this seems a jumble, it's late here. No, all good! Thanks again	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 05:38 PM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Too many to list. 5 y.o. girls will stand around the playground talking and practicing social skills while the boys are racing and engaging in contests of strength. This is entirely natural and occurs because of innate differences. And more differences just appear from then on e.g. males are more interested in mechanical things, females are more interested in social ones. Interesting! If you could provide more studies on this, that would be great. I would be careful about saying that things are …	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 05:35 PM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Absolutely, completely agree with you on all of these points. I'll have to read the book to develop a fully formed opinion, though! Do you know where I could get the book? Is it worth the read?	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 05:24 PM
0	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Most notably, there is the, objectively incorrect, view that men and women are not inherently different, aside from their reproductive organs. What are the inherent differences between the genders, then? Are you talking about assigned sex, or gender identity? And where do non binary, transgender, and intersexual people fit into all of this? For purposes of child rearing, it is extremely effective for men to provide and protect while women give birth and look after the home and children. For sure…	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 06:38 AM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Interesting take! Please feel free to clarify, I'd love to learn more	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 06:08 AM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Great questions! I believe that gender roles are okay as long as people aren't forced to be in them. For example, there are many "masculine" men and there are many "feminine" women that genuinely enjoy being in those roles. So, do I believe we should get rid of them? Not necessarily. Instead, I believe that we should dismantle the belief that fitting into certain gender roles is necessary. Both gender and sex are inherently very complex. Some people don't seem to realize that. Why did they evo…	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 06:07 AM
-2	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Well, according to radical feminists, the patriarchy is the institutionalized system that cause men to be allowed to have more freedom, more power, more control, etc., without having any downfalls simply on the basis of sex. In my opinion? At its most basic level, the patriarchy is the institutionalized system that causes both women, men, and everyone in between to be harmfully forced into gender roles. Many feminists will argue with me and state that since women's legal rights were taken away a…	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 05:37 AM
2	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Wow, I've never thought of it like this. I've always encouraged men to be more emotionally open, while still understanding that they have rich emotional lives, but those emotional lives might be different from women. Whether that's due to nature, nurture, or some messy combination, I believe that you're right. And for sure, women belittling men for showing emotions has become very normalized. In many cases, I've seen men showing emotions as the butt of many jokes, patriarchy or not. All in all, …	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 05:32 AM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! That's exactly what I'm getting. The branch of feminism labelled as "radical feminism" (which I don't agree with because of its demonization and vilification of men as well as blaming absolutely everything on the patriarchy) is the mainstream. Or, a big side of the mainstream at least, alongside liberal feminism.	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 05:27 AM
0	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! I think the point they're trying to get across is that men do not contribute to the patriarchy just because they are men, nor are they saying that the patriarchy is an accurate reflection of men. It's more like they're saying that since men are forced into these gender roles just as much as women are, due to the patriarchy, they're also being severely negatively impacted. Albeit I'd have to read more about patriarchy theory to fully understand it. Please let me know if there's anything else I sh…	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 05:19 AM
-1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! Wow, thank you so much for sending me this! Reading it has reaffirmed that siding with the MRA and egalitarians in general is a pretty good decision. I do definitely suggest looking into different types of feminism (aside from radical feminism, which is mostly referenced to in this article). I specifically suggest looking into visionary feminism, which sorta seems like a lofty view of feminism at first glance, but since it equally addresses men's issues as well, I think it's worth researching.	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 05:05 AM
1	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! I would agree that resentment and envy towards men leads to a lot of misandry, double standards, and other harmful things defined as "radical" feminism (which I obviously don't identify with). But I wouldn't say it's the key emotional driving factor of feminism and for feminists in general. I think that's a very broad claim, especially considering that there are different types of feminism that specifically advocate for men as well (i.e. visionary feminism). I also don't think there is such a th…	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 04:50 AM
-4	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! I think that's more of a definition of radical feminism and most of the mainstream forms of feminism. You're right, but there are other types, such as visionary feminism, which is defined as follows: "It is rooted in the love of male and female being, refusing to privilege one over the other. The soul of [visionary] feminist politics to is the commitment to ending patriarchal domination of women and men, girls and boys." This is why I identify most with visionary feminism, because I view it as m…	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 04:46 AM
2	To those in this subreddit who are both men's rights advocates and feminists: I'd love to know more! For sure!	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 03:35 AM
1	My problems with this subreddit I would need to see some data before I can accept that violence against transwomen is about power and control. I don't know for sure, so I'm reluctant to go along with it, especially when "power and control" is a motive erroneously ascribed to nearly every male activity. Great point! Here is a variety of sources, opinions, and statistics about the matter, including a theatrical but informative video from Natalie Wynn/ContraPoints: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PbBzhqJK3bg https://www.deviantar…	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 02:10 AM
1	As someone who has seen both sides of the fence, men really have it rough right now. Absolutely agreed. On another note, I hope you can heal and get the support you need. <3	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 01:50 AM
1	As someone who has seen both sides of the fence, men really have it rough right now. Good question. Here are a few answers I found: "Criminologist here. The National Crime Victimization Survey (NCVS) is the most widely used source of data that includes unreported crime, excluding murder (because it's impossible to survey murder victims). 90,000 nationally representative households are surveyed each year and nearly 160,000 individuals are surveyed in total. In terms of accuracy, it's actually considered more accurate than the FBI's Uniform Crime Report (UCR), which records crimes…	/r/MensRights	23/02/21 01:49 AM
11	As someone who has seen both sides of the fence, men really have it rough right now. Rape (and all forms of sexual assault/abuse for that matter) are very hard to prove. You're right in saying that it happens way more than it should, but we also have to mention the cases that aren't reported. According to the Canadian Official Website, the majority (83%) of sexual assaults weren't reported in 2014. And according to the National Sexual Violence Resource Center: "Forty-percent (40%) of rapes and sexual assaults were reported to police in 2017, but only about 25% were reported to p…	/r/MensRights	18/02/21 07:08 PM
2	My problems with this subreddit Oh wow, these are all very interesting takes! First of all, thank you so much for talking about this. I've always been someone who values trying to view topics like this as complicated and complex, so thank you for bringing all of this to my attention. About what you said about violence against trans women, I suppose it is way more complex than I ever considered it to be. But I don't know if disgust at male-bodied people accurately describes why violence towards trans women happens. For sure, th…	/r/MensRights	18/02/21 06:59 PM
-1	What makes them think THEY'RE so special? Again, I'm saying that not all women who are murdered are victims of gender-based murder. Not to mention that I highly disagree when feminists assume that all women who are murdered are victims of gender-based murder. But here's a list of resources you can look into for more info! Feel free to list some for me to check into about murders against men or anything that debunks these: https://www.ohchr.org/Documents/Issues/Women/WRGS/OnePagers/Gender_motivated_killings.pdf https://www.nlm.nih.gov/ex…	/r/AntiFeminists	18/02/21 06:21 PM
0	Absoloutely reeks of buyers remorse and revenge allegation for getting played. This is the shit cops have to deal with on a daily basis: lies and false allegations. I've personally seen it in people Ive met/known in the past. Weaponizing the legal system against men with false allegations. That's a giant claim to make, OP. Accusing someone of lying when you don't have proof is just as bad, even arguably worse than blindly believing a victim.	/r/AntiFeminists	18/02/21 06:06 PM
0	My problems with this subreddit Toxic masculinity can manifest in transphobia towards trans women. If you have anything that I can read about women being transphobic in the same way or similar ways towards trans men, I would actually really love to hear about it! I haven't thought about that and would love to learn more. Not once did I state that women can't be abusers, or that they don't make up a great chunk of abusers. In fact, I have always tried my best to support women (especially in lesbian relationships where DV can be…	/r/MensRights	18/02/21 06:05 PM
1	Why are only men "titled" and upheld to standards that women are shedding away Okay, could you go more in depth about that?	/r/MensRights	18/02/21 05:58 PM
11	Just lost my scholarship because of a false harassement accusation I used to use Discord a lot but don't know any specific servers. Although I suggest looking up mental-health related tags on Disboard.org and similar Discord server listing websites. If I find any specific support group, I'll let you know. Much love and warm wishes <3	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 07:50 PM
100	Just lost my scholarship because of a false harassement accusation This is genuinely awful. No wonder why you feel terrified. If there's anything we can do to help you out, please let us know. I know it's only Reddit, but even just reading the comments shows that many of us are willing to give you advice and support you through this.	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 07:36 PM
-1	My problems with this subreddit Toxic masculinity doesn't mean all men who deal with these issues are going to be toxic towards other people. Their toxic masculinity may be internalized rather than externalized. So, in no way am I saying that all men who deal with toxic masculinity express it in violent ways. Thus, comparing this to African-American crime rates makes no sense, especially considering that comparing racial discrimination to sexist discrimination is like comparing apples and oranges.	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 07:29 PM
1	Half of men have had unwanted sexual experiences, UK study finds For sure!	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 07:01 PM
-2	Why are only men "titled" and upheld to standards that women are shedding away Could you explain? I'm always open to differing opinions and would love to learn more	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 07:01 PM
-1	Absoloutely reeks of buyers remorse and revenge allegation for getting played. This is the shit cops have to deal with on a daily basis: lies and false allegations. I've personally seen it in people Ive met/known in the past. Weaponizing the legal system against men with false allegations. This is a perfect example of victim blaming. Many police officers don't respond well to reports of sexual assault, and reporting sexual assault can be a horrific, traumatizing experience. Do I think she could have handled the situation better? Of course. Am I going to blindly believe her? Nope. But her choices do not make literal sexual assault her fault. People who victim blame tend to think that just because a victim did something dumb, part of the blame is transferred. No, it isn't.	/r/AntiFeminists	17/02/21 06:25 PM
1	exactly Refusing to understand why toxic incels act the way they do does nothing to dismantle and debunk their ideology, as well as it does nothing to dismantle and debunk the underlying causes of it, which seem to always end up at the patriarchy. But this doesn't mean we should not be holding toxic incels accountable for their bigotry and sexism. Finding that balance is key.	/r/AntiFeminists	17/02/21 06:22 PM
-3	Get pegged, incel I don't think there's anything wrong with encouraging men to explore their feminine sides by normalizing men wearing dresses, men with nail polish, etc. Hell, even getting pegged, if you're into that or open to it lmao. But I agree that this should always be paired with the dismantling of toxic masculinity and the patriarchy's negative effects on men, while still holding the incels that DO hate women accountable.	/r/AntiFeminists	17/02/21 06:19 PM
-3	What makes them think THEY'RE so special? Any kind of violence should be met with protests and people fighting against it. But unless the man was murdered because he was a man, it makes sense that feminism is incorporated when women are murdered, because many (not all, but many) women are murdered due to sexism. So, let's just protest against all violence. Please.	/r/AntiFeminists	17/02/21 06:12 PM
4	"Don't rely on a man, but be more than happy to rely on his money." Obviously I don't agree that parents teaching their daughters that all men are abusive or rapists (I think we should be weary of everyone, not just men), encouraging women to marry rich men is harmful to both the women and the men. It's implying that a woman won't be able to make her own money and a good life, and it's causing men to be used only for their economic status. Truly fucked up in both ways!	/r/AntiFeminists	17/02/21 06:10 PM
2	The Problem with False Accusations and Sexual Assault/Rape Trials Awh thanks! No need to apologize, but I appreciate the empathy :) and yeah, for sure! I get that	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 06:01 PM
2	The Problem with False Accusations and Sexual Assault/Rape Trials For sure! As a victim of sexual assault, I wouldn't even consider myself a survivor because it just feels too,,, heroic. What happened to me wasn't an act of heroism, yknow? What other terms would you suggest?	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 05:56 PM
2	The Problem with False Accusations and Sexual Assault/Rape Trials Ah, now I understand what you mean! I think I can agree with that, even at least to an extent.	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 05:42 PM
1	The Problem with False Accusations and Sexual Assault/Rape Trials Eh, I'm not sure about that. Most people who use "survivor" in this context aren't meaning it in a literal sense, and are instead commenting on the horrific impacts of emotional trauma. Yes, almost losing your life is very horrific as well, but that doesn't mean everyone who has almost lost their lives has worse trauma than those who haven't, and vice versa. It's very much a subjective, individual experience. At the same time, though, this topic is already a pretty touchy one. I just hope that p…	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 05:36 PM
0	I have a question for you men; is “kill all men” a joke to you? I can't speak for men, since I'm not one, but here's my take: I think it depends on the person making these jokes, how they respond to criticism, etc. In this example, it seems like these women are invalidating your opinions, which is incredibly hypocritical. I agree that a good chunk of women actually think being sexist towards men is going to solve things, but as I hope we all know, it isn't. On the other hand, if it's an actually a constructed joke with a punchline, and is told to the right a…	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 05:33 PM
2	The Problem with False Accusations and Sexual Assault/Rape Trials Very interesting! You're right, trauma can definitely be faked unless the trial includes scans of the brain (since emotionally traumatized brains are very different from non-traumatized brains). But even that gets tricky. I think including a great variety of trauma survivors/victims in this conversation is very important, as well as clinicians, doctors, lawyers, etc. I don't know about making a whole new term to replace "survivor" when it comes to different forms of sexual assault. If there's an…	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 05:23 PM
-2	My problems with this subreddit I can agree with most of this, but to answer your question on toxic masculinity: in my opinion, I believe that toxic masculinity is the feeling that you NEED to be masculine, and the idea of "masculinity" is warped. This is why many straight cis men have been violent and abusive towards women who they found out were trans (i.e. the history of the slur "tr*p"). This is a prominent reason why some men turn out to be abusers. I believe that men can present themselves in traditionally masculine ways…	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 04:59 PM
-2	Why are only men "titled" and upheld to standards that women are shedding away I don't like it when men say "Oh, you being sexist to us is the exact same as the sexism you face!!" (that just isn't true. Both men and women face sexism, but it's like comparing apples to oranges). But it's like this giant chunk of feminists don't understand that the patriarchy negatively affects EVERYONE, like I just implied. Also, to anyone in the comments saying that all women are like this: you are completely defeating the point of this post. But hey, that's just my opinion.	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 04:42 PM
3	Half of men have had unwanted sexual experiences, UK study finds God, this is so important to talk about. Reading articles like these enrages me most of the time ("How could anyone DO that to someone???"), but on the other hand, I'm glad light is being shed on male SA victims/survivors. If one of my male friends came to me and told me about their sexual trauma, are there any ways I could respond without coming off as dismissive, invalidating, etc.? Usually I act the same way as I would with any type of SA victim/survivor, but I wonder if there's a specific wa…	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 04:20 PM
1	The Problem with False Accusations and Sexual Assault/Rape Trials I agree! I think this is a very important take. The hard part is deciding punishments, because, for example, a rape victim/survivor might have less trauma related to the crime than a victim/survivor of sexual coercion, even sexual harassment. How do you think the legal system would account for that, if possible? Or, what kind of punishments are you thinking?	/r/MensRights	17/02/21 04:07 PM