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becomesharp Archive

View 4 posts and 1,380 comments by becomesharp on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

Yeah have never been, so women there could be different. I'm only speaking from how women are in the west.
/r/seduction27/07/26 06:07 AM
3

Depends. Not usually, but depends on the individuals. For most young, attractive women in western countries, they have too many options so they don't feel the need to entertain the attention of men who bring, "boring but pleasant conversation." In fact, being boring, safe, and unprovocative conversation is usually one of the fastest ways to get them to walk away because 90% of guys are like that. That said, women with very low self esteem, or women who are very polite, or relatively unattractive…
/r/seduction27/07/26 04:20 AM
6

99% this was not a drinks scam. Drinks scams do not waste 2 hours talking to some random guy for $15 worth of drinks. What most likely happened here is that things were going well and then you made a series of mistakes that turned them off. The vodka thing, the insecurity about drinks scam thing, etc. It doesn't take much to screw up even the most "sure" seeming set. That doesn't mean the pull was guaranteed if you didn't make those mistakes, but you were heading in the right direction. Chalk it…
/r/seduction27/07/26 03:53 AM
2

Its not just confidence. It's Confidence/Self Esteem + Social Skills/Charisma. When we talk about "game" we're really just referring to all of those things under one umbrella.
/r/seduction27/07/26 02:35 AM
1

This framework is technically fine, but its so abstract that its not actionable and will be difficult to implement. It's like if you were learning to fight and AI gave you an entire page on "be one with the universe and believe in yourself." It's not WRONG per se... it's just not particularly useful.
/r/seduction26/07/26 10:45 PM
14

I think youre going to have a hard time finding guys here who have never struggled because those guys generally arent in this sub. Which is exactly why I've skimmed through the first 10 or so replies and none of them are from "guys who have never struggled." That said, you probably won't get much useful information out of those guys even if you do ask them this question. They have no idea what theyre doing differently because they've never been us. To them, theyre just "being themselves." Imagin…
/r/seduction26/07/26 04:04 AM
1

"Hook" refers to social hook point, or the point at which a group no longer wants you to leave (during a cold approach). It's the point at which they go from indifferent or hostile to wanting you to stay and wanting to talk to you. Generally speaking, you get to that point by being interesting, funny, charming, or charismatic. It also works to have Dicaprio come up to you and put his arm around you and tell you how awesome you are, but that is much more difficult to pull off.
/r/seduction26/07/26 02:10 AM
1

It's too open ended of a question for me to give you specific instructions/fixes, but broadly speaking, what works to improve conversations are: Do 20-50 reps (approaches, interactions with women, etc) every week Go watch all of vinh giang's stuff on youtube. A lot of it centers around conversational ability. Write down the specific areas where youre struggling the most and once you have those symptoms, ask claude to give you potential solutions based on what Vinh Giang or Vanessa Van Edwards wo…
/r/seduction26/07/26 01:57 AM
6

Books are very, very low-yield for dating/seduction, so keep that in mind. It's like reading a book on how to ride a bike. There might be some interesting pointers, but 99% of learning to ride a bike is getting on one and repeatedly trying. If youre going to read a book, first do some approaches, figure out your sticking points and what you need to work on, and THEN select the book. Too many people are trying to buy a comprehensive "one size fits all" book that solves all of their problems, no m…
/r/seduction25/07/26 12:48 PM
3

Here's a good starting point for diagnostic info i would need. What did you mean when you said your approaches don't end up working if when you do approach you guys end up talking and exchanging contact information? When you're talking to women on text or DM, are they excited and investing in the conversation or does it feel a bit like theyre answering politely or with minimal investment? Are they ever flirtng with you or asking you when youre going to hang out? Why are you sending pictures back…
/r/seduction25/07/26 12:45 PM
2

Progressive desensitization. Start very very small and work your way up. Right now you're starting at medium or high difficulty (which is too high of a difficulty to overcome initial inertia) and then stacking outcome dependence on top of that. That's a recipe for failure. Instead start with something more like: Week 1: 10 approaches asking for directions and then leaving. Don't get a number, don't start a conversation, just ask for where Starbucks is, say thanks, and then walk away. If this is …
/r/seduction25/07/26 08:58 AM
0

I'm a HUGE proponent of therapy but based on the OP's description, this isn't primarily a therapy problem. It's a tactical/outer game issue. Therapy in general is good for everyone so I'm not saying don't go, but I don't think it will help with this particular issue unless his therapist is also an experienced dating coach.
/r/seduction25/07/26 08:49 AM
1

On what?
/r/seduction25/07/26 07:57 AM
5

agreed, but hes not saying he cant be a bf. He's saying his approaches arent even hooking. Thats a social skill issue.
/r/seduction25/07/26 02:15 AM
17

I'm going to be super honest with you, man. I dont think your self-assessment is very accurate. Because it's very contradictory. Youre reporting that you're tall, fit, decently good looking, funny, and good at small talk and dont have issues talking to women or approaching them, but then say that most of the time approaching doesnt go well for you. You're tall, good looking, fit, but then don't get any results online (though that could be bad photos). You're saying your great at getting to the t…
/r/seduction24/07/26 11:21 PM
7

Oh for sure but that's not a fancy camera. That's a long lens and the skill to know how to use it. Most modern camera phones also have a tele lens now. OP is going to buy like a canon r6 with 35mm lens for several thousand and is going to be so confused why his camera phone takes better photos.
/r/seduction24/07/26 10:59 PM
6

I'm a pro photographer. A fancy camera won't get you better photos, trust me. It's like Dom Toretto says: "Its not the car, it's the driver." Spend the money on a photographer, not a camera.
/r/seduction24/07/26 10:54 PM
3

Pick ONE coach or paradigm or style and stick with that. Choose the coach who has the most similar demographics as you or had the most similar struggle to you. If you're a 5'4" shy asian engineer, dont pick a 6'2" smooth black guy to follow because he isnt going to understand what its like to be you. Stop reading EVERYTHING else. Shoot for 20-50 interactions/approaches per week. Troubleshoot and research solutions AFTER you do your approaches, not before you do them. That will just paralyze you.…
/r/seduction24/07/26 09:56 PM
1

it is underrated, but you have the mechanism mostly wrong. Eye contact doesnt generally create attraction. Eye contact mostly creates SEXUAL TENSION. For example, if she thinks you're gross and is disgusted by you, does strong eye contact change how she feels about you, even in the slightest? No. In fact it makes her MORE grossed out by you because repulsion + sexual tension = more disgust. But if she's already kind of into you and you develop sexual tension, then now you're moving things forwar…
/r/seduction24/07/26 09:45 PM
1

That voice in your head is called "approach anxiety." Chances are, if the same girl was in another city, that voice would then say, "oh but you cant approach her now, what if she knows someone who knows you, then your reputation would be ruined!" Approach anxiety is the master of excuses. And excuses are like assholes. Everyone has one and they all stink.
/r/seduction24/07/26 09:20 PM
1

No it doesnt. AI is VERY obvious when you know what to look for, and even when you use tools to convert it, it still sounds off. Like too formal. Gus has been around for a long time and his writing is very distinctive and very consistent. Go read his old writing. Sounds exactly the same as this. I would be shocked if he was using AI to write because ive been reading his writing for a few years now and its always sounded the same.
/r/seduction24/07/26 09:08 PM
1

Reps are reps
/r/seduction24/07/26 08:00 PM
3

If youre telling her youre not looking for anything serious and youre still repeatedly getting women falling in love, it either means there's too big of a divide in looks (e.g., youre MUCH more attractive than her, so she feels like youre a rare commodity), or youre doing too much deep rapport/emotional connection, aka love bombing. The key is not pulling back charisma/game, the key is pulling back emotional connection and heavy interest.
/r/seduction24/07/26 07:59 PM
1

I'm actually not clear on what you mean when you commented above: "...it is due to feminism ONLY IN THE WAY that womens autonomy unavoidable makes it so not everyone's goal can "start a family with the first person you meet." Can you clarify?
/r/ExRedPill24/07/26 05:50 AM
1

I obviously dont agree with you on the subject, but i do very much respect your intellectual honesty and consistency.
/r/ExRedPill24/07/26 05:42 AM
2

Mark's book is about mindset, not tactics, which is why it feels like "fluff" and doesnt feel actionable. Because its not about techniques. But that doesnt mean it's a scam. It's like saying that therapists are scams because they dont give you actionable advice, but they want to talk about emotions and "fluff." Mark has mastered both writing and dating to a very high degree. I've seen him do both firsthand over the years. Anyone who says mark hasnt mastered dating has never seen him in a bar or …
/r/ExRedPill24/07/26 05:39 AM
10

It's terrifying, dude. This will always be a niche community because the idea of cold approaching strangers is one of the most anxiety inducing things a man can do
/r/seduction23/07/26 10:27 PM
3

Thanks chatgpt, good to see you again.
/r/ExRedPill23/07/26 04:42 PM
3

Yeah that entire subculture is super contradictory. Like they always shit on feminists for hating men but they hate women. Or they shit on women for being hypergamous (wanting to date men of higher status) when they want to date women who are more attractive than them. It's like one giant hypocrisy convention.
/r/ExRedPill23/07/26 07:15 AM
3

Subjugation. They think women are beneath them but still feel like women's approval makes them more of a man. I would assume it's roughly similar to if you were a porn star and you looked down on your fans/subscribers but still felt validated that you had a lot of men who wanted you or subscribed to you.
/r/ExRedPill23/07/26 04:06 AM
3

Yeah agreed. It's really a redpill thing. Redpill never even started out as self improvement. The men's movements BEFORE the redpill did, but with redpill, from the beginning its central ideology was that women are inferior, stupid, worse than men, and evil/conniving, so everything is filtered through that lens. It's one of the few things as a guy that gives me the ick. Can't stand it. So the self improvement stuff also gets filtered through that lens, which means that going to the gym isn't to …
/r/ExRedPill23/07/26 03:54 AM
1

It depends on what you need and your demographics, so the optimal strategy is personalized mentoring for YOUR specific situation. But if you can't afford that, you'll need to self study. For most guys, Vinh Giang, the charisma on command guys, and Vanessa van edwards are your best bet, especially if you're still running out of things to say. Todd is probably still your best bet for cold approaching, but remember that the best way to learn cold approach is to do it. Learn the basics of approachin…
/r/seduction22/07/26 06:04 PM
1

That's fair. Okay honest question: Someone breaks into your house at 2am and your wife and daughter are terrified and want you to barricade the door but you're too scared to come out from under the bed so your wife has to put her own body against the door to keep the bad guy from coming into the bedroom. Do you consider that the "wrong way to be a man?" That doesn't necessarily make you a shitty person. You're just scared and are unable to summon the courage we normally would expect of a man to …
/r/ExRedPill21/07/26 03:34 PM
4

You guys have already had sex, you dont need to micromanage your investment like that. She already likes you. Dont worry about shit like double texting (dont worry about that in general, because its a dumb rule, but ESPECIALLY not now) Youre correct that you do NOT want to be confrontational or put pressure on her. But you can reach out and see how she's doing. Right now throwing traditional game will come off playerish and weird. Calibrated vulnerability will get you MUCH further. If she's givi…
/r/seduction21/07/26 02:33 PM
2

No competition meaning very few men are able to talk to women in real life now, so if youre one of the ones who can, you dont have a lot of competition from other guys. One of the primary reasons men are struggling with dating right now is because they lack social skills and the confidence/ability to talk to women. This is why i have ugly guys and good looking guys coming to me for help. I have rich and poor guys coming to me for help. I have tall and short guys coming to me for help. I have doc…
/r/ExRedPill21/07/26 10:23 AM
1

Stop using fictional characters as examples for how you should be doing things.
/r/seduction21/07/26 10:02 AM
2

My guys who have been cold approaching for many years also havent been experiencing much difference IRL, but online apps have taken a severe nose dive. Students using a profile that used to get a lot of matches is now getting a fraction of what it used to (same text, same photos). And I'm seeing that in multiple states with multiple demographics among a large sample size. Current suspicion / theory is that apps are nerfing a percentage of organic matching so that men are forced to pay to play. D…
/r/seduction21/07/26 10:01 AM
2

It stings, yes. No way around that. Very normal. But you want to make sure that feeling doesnt progress from STING to UNHAPPY/FEELING WORTHLESS. I know it feels like it, but you are not in competition with your friend in the big picture. In the big picture (e.g., in the next 5-10 years), the only thing that's going to matter to you is: "did i get good" and "do i have the skills to attract the women I like." Youre not going to care if this one time at an open mic, a girl you like looked at your f…
/r/seduction21/07/26 09:21 AM
1

Yup, this is the right answer. The causal factor isn't primarily society, or feminism, or women's standards, or any of that bullshit. It's that men arent asking out women at all (and that men have abysmal social skills due to spending their youth in front of a screen and not in front of other kids). It's notable that avg men who are talking to a lot of women in real life and asking them out arent on the internet complaining about it being so hard. Probably a good reason for that.
/r/ExRedPill21/07/26 08:46 AM
6

Nah, youre using data from online dating (which is true) and trying to extrapolate it to real life. But real life is very, very different than online. Guys that are socially skilled, confident, and can talk to women in real life are CLEANING UP right now. They are doing even better than men were doing 20 years ago because there's almost no competition.
/r/ExRedPill21/07/26 08:43 AM
1

No, you didn't say: "men are a bunch of reactionary sore losers who are just mad women are getting rights as if men were nothing but a bunch of domineering assholes angry that their power was stolen from them, and that most of the problems are just imagined because they are told they got problems when deep down they dont." But you did say: "...because many straight, white, christian men were so threatened and resistant to these ideals [e.g., feminism] on face value that instead of exploring or h…
/r/ExRedPill21/07/26 08:29 AM
5

Call me crazy, but I would argue that being redpill and hating women and trying to take advantage of them is a VERY good example of "the wrong way to be a man."
/r/ExRedPill21/07/26 07:43 AM
1

Haha yeah chase is a friend of mine. We used to train in San Diego together when we were students. I've perused it a few times but dont have the bandwidth to join ANOTHER forum. Hard enough as it is to keep up with reddit.
/r/seduction21/07/26 03:28 AM
5

Hahaha yeah man, I'm old. Don't remind me. Things are great, though. Just weird that some of my new students have parents around my age.
/r/ExRedPill20/07/26 11:40 PM
2

Thanks man, good to see you here too. I'm curious how the incels react to it because theyre kind of not really manosphere but obviously anti-dating coach too.
/r/ExRedPill20/07/26 11:27 PM
11

Yeah i thought he did great. Conversations ended prematurely, unfortunately, but i thought he nailed it. I dont really like the format of "people vote when to kick people off" because it seems to incentivize the other attendees to vote people off as soon as the speakers say things that they dont agree with. I think it would be better served if they each got a 15 minute spot or if there was a neutral moderator who kept the conversations on track and decided when to switch to a new participant.
/r/ExRedPill20/07/26 11:16 PM
2

DJ Fuji
/r/ExRedPill20/07/26 11:15 PM
12

In cold approach there isnt an algorithm stopping attractive women from knowing you exist. (attractive women dont even see most avg looking guys in their app feed. The algorithms literally filter you out so that the girl doesn't get discouraged and leave). You learn to approach more attractive women (because they are often the women who are in bars and clubs) and that quantity gives you a lot of experience with learning how to interact with them (assuming youre actually approaching and not just …
/r/seduction20/07/26 12:31 PM
10

I like Todd. I've only met him once or twice so i dont know him well, but he's one of the best coaches to come out of the RSD camp. Knows what he's talking about. But some of his stuff is hard to pull off for a newbie. Ironically, his verbals are very similar in vibe to david d's, but that kind of gamey/cocky style ("you look like trouble") is VERY hard to pull off today because girls find it super cringe. It worked amazing in 2007. But like fashion, things change, and what was cool in '07 (e.g.…
/r/seduction20/07/26 12:06 PM
15

Good job writing a field report, man. Most guys arent even approaching, much less writing FRs afterward. Pro Tip: if you really want to make noticeable improvements, you'll want to write FRs by covering these topics: * What I was working on when i went out * How the night went and how i felt about it * What I did well tonight * What I could have done better * What I am going to focus on next time Also, something to keep in mind: David D's stuff is very very outdated. It's around a quarter centur…
/r/seduction20/07/26 11:55 AM
2

I've said this a million times, but my SO was not attracted to me at ALL when we first met. Like ZERO attraction. Which makes sense, I'm a 5'4" asian guy who isn't particularly good looking. I've dated a shitload of women, but none of them were because a girl saw me and thought, "wow what a hot short asian man that is." If it's impossible to create attraction when there isnt any to begin with (which is ironic because it's been well documented in the scientific literature that this is possible), …
/r/seduction20/07/26 11:50 AM
2

Doesn't mean cold approach doesnt work. It means you didnt get good in a year. This is a tough skill. Many of the OG coaches took over a year to have sex for the first time.
/r/seduction20/07/26 11:25 AM
1

That's not game, dude. Maybe that's your own personal definition (which is fine), but that's not the definition established by the guys who created this community. I was IN THE ROOM when Mystery explained what it was, and it was NOT "leading a girl who already likes you to have sex." That takes relatively little skill. That reduces the entire skill set to just "leading and escalating." It's like saying martial arts is "beating up a guy who is much smaller than you." Game is the ability to meet, …
/r/seduction20/07/26 11:23 AM
1

I've been often quoted (by Mark, ironically, when he was a coach) as saying that 97-98% of guys will never achieve their goals in this community. That was very controversial to say back then. So yes, I agree. But thats not because any of them are giving you "bad advice." That's just the nature of any endeavor that is extraordinarily difficult. How many guys who sign up for a gym who want to be shredded one day with a 6 pack actually make it to that goal? 1%? Maybe 2%? How many guys who want to b…
/r/seduction20/07/26 11:00 AM
6

Oh thats not "short term quick success". Short term quick success = going out to cold approach and getting dates with attractive women and having sex very quickly.
/r/seduction20/07/26 10:51 AM
5

Waiting for IOIs is not cold approach. By definition, that's warm approach. It's also not game. It's looking around for girls who want you. A much hotter girl than you is not walking through life throwing IOIs at uglier guys. I can tell you from experience that that doesn't happen. So if youre not willing to cold approach, youre relegating yourself to less attractive women for the most part.
/r/seduction20/07/26 10:50 AM
13

You can get quick sex from cold approach but can't get relationships out if it?? If so, that's not a marker of cold approach, its a marker of you doing something wrong during or after sex. Remember that >90% of guys here are NOT casanovas. Most guys here are below average looking with poor social skills. That's why they're here. God knows that was me when I first started. What happens when you take a 5'4" dorky, timid, asian computer programmer with poor social skills and get him to cold approac…
/r/seduction20/07/26 10:47 AM
1

As usual, one of the best comments is at the bottom.
/r/seduction20/07/26 10:41 AM
1

Nah, i know Mark personally. He's legit. He did thousands of cold approaches and i was there for a lot of them. One of the best guys I ever winged with.
/r/seduction20/07/26 10:40 AM
1

Mark started out in pickup and later became a coach in this industry before he became an author. He has done a SHITLOAD of approaches. We used to guest instruct at each other's boot camps.
/r/seduction20/07/26 10:39 AM
41

Cold approach is bad if you want quick or easy results. But it's great for developing the social skills/game, courage, and confidence that benefit you long term. Also good for being able to date out of your league. Online dating is bad if you're not physically attractive, tall, or both, or willing to put in a lot of work for somewhat mediocre results. Also bad if you want to date women more attractive than you. But it's (relatively) great if youre good looking but also shy, timid, or otherwise s…
/r/seduction20/07/26 10:35 AM
2

Modern dating is 80-90% the same as old school era. The paint job is new but the engine under it is the same. Just need some tweaks to fit the current meta. For example, cocky funny used to be great in 2005. It's super cringe now. Things like that. Looksmaxxing is retarded. Not because it's bad to work on your looks, that's fine. It's retarded because it comes from the underlying belief that looks are the ONLY thing that matter in dating and that's simply not true. Looksmaxxing is like if there …
/r/seduction19/07/26 09:39 AM
2

Group. Theory.
/r/seduction19/07/26 04:33 AM
2

Yeah dude the problem is that he doesnt know what preselection is. He thinks preselection is "alpha male flexing on ig"
/r/seduction19/07/26 12:10 AM
2

If you've ever been on a date or talking with a girl who is mildly into you and then some random guy comes in and is super funny and teasing her and you can SEE her attraction for him grow by the minute, you will know that teasing/banter/push-pull is SUPER effective.
/r/seduction19/07/26 12:07 AM
2

It's definitely overrated but not because it doesn't work. It's overrated because it requires too drastic of a quantity in order to see a visible effect. It's sort of like how making money is overrated in dating. It's not that making money doesn't work, it's that making money doesn't start working until you're at the very very high upper echelons of income. In America, making 100k or 400k a year have both roughly the same effect in dating (unless you live in a place like SF where you cant afford…
/r/seduction19/07/26 12:05 AM
1

Preselection is mate choice copying. It's when women see other women into you and it influences how they see you because their brain takes a mental shortcut: "other (attractive) women are into him and therefore there must be something valuable about him." Preselection requires the women being into you to be visible in some way. Preselection doesn't get triggered by the existence of you being tall. It gets triggered by OTHER WOMEN REACTING TO YOU. Being tall might be an attractive trait, but it's…
/r/seduction18/07/26 11:51 PM
1

Lol no. That's not what pre-selection means at all
/r/seduction18/07/26 09:24 PM
2

lol @ "that other guy becomesharp focuses entirely on inner game." Ironically, one of the first awards I ever got at a major convention was for "best technical (outer) game" I'm neither inner nor outer -- i'm BOTH. Because just like MMA, you cant "just be a striker" or "just be a grappler." You will get your ass handed to you if you don't have both. Anyhow, here are my thoughts on your comment: Your instinct that DHVs operate from a place of "im not good enough" is mostly true -- it is absolutel…
/r/seduction18/07/26 09:47 AM
2

FYI this stuff doesnt work. It never really worked, but it works even LESS today. Speaking from someone who knows mystery method VERY well and taught it professionally for years. Highly advise you update your skill catalog.
/r/seduction17/07/26 10:16 PM
3

He already can approach and he can talk. He just doesnt know what to talk about. So he's stacking routines. I did the same thing and learned from Mystery himself during the project hollywood days, so i know this world well. The problem is that routines VERY quickly become a crutch that doesnt scale well socially. Assuming you can approach (which he can), it's then better to focus on learning the skill and art of conversation instead of learning how to memorize lines. Otherwise you're doing the e…
/r/seduction17/07/26 10:14 PM
5

Fucking BRILLIANT breakdown of preselection. 100% spot on. I remember in 2006 asking Mystery at a party why preselection wasnt working when I would walk around the room with two women on my arm and he explained it really well to me: "Preselection is when women find you attractive without you chasing them and without you flaunting it. The moment you try to show it or you try to create it, the effect disappears"
/r/seduction17/07/26 09:53 PM
1

Optimal way is to use a "tension loop." Ideally after the hook point. But it's basically any time when they get curious about something and either ask you a question theyre really curious about or you're telling a dramatic story that has them wanting to know what happens next. It's called a tension loop because in that moment there's dramatic tension because they want to know more. That's when you sit down, ideally as you continue talking. The tension loop completely disguises the sit down, whic…
/r/seduction17/07/26 09:49 PM
1

Stop focusing on lines and start focusing on conversational fundamentals. You're trying to learn a fadeaway 3 point shot before you learn to do a layup. The game is won from fundamentals, not from fancy tricks.
/r/seduction17/07/26 09:35 PM
1

The "trouble" line is a bit cringe by today's standards. It can still work, but it's a bit outdated because it makes you sound like a 2005 era pickup artist. Which makes perfect sense, but it's one of the reasons I tell my guys not to use that type of banter anymore.
/r/seduction17/07/26 09:35 PM
1

I don't let random comments from random strangers ruin my day or my week or my month/year. I choose what to focus on and what my reality is, and that is not part of it. Yes, upward social mobility in dating has never been as possible as it is today. Your ability to be born into essentially an "undateable" class and be able to overcome that and date women that most people think should be impossible has never been as accessible as it is today. Even in my own lifetime, in the 80s you had way more r…
/r/seduction17/07/26 09:30 PM
1

Older than early 30s but cant say more due to privacy. Nearly everyone CAN date. But not everyone is willing to put in the work. If you're part of a disadvantaged group (short, neurodivergent, asian/south asian, depression/anxiety, etc), youre unlikely to get an active dating life without putting in the work. That's not sad, that's exciting, because it means with sheer work ethic, you can overcome gigantic demographic, physical, and genetic things that SHOULD be dealbreakers in dating. No time i…
/r/seduction17/07/26 09:13 PM
1

Yeah 30s
/r/seduction17/07/26 08:53 PM
1

Stop using negs. They don't work in 99% of situations and in the 1% of situations that they do, they require a VERY high skill level. Negs are the flying spin kick of the dating world.
/r/seduction17/07/26 08:13 AM
1

Stop trying to get a FWB relationship. In fact, stop trying to get a "result" with a girl in general. ESPECIALLY stop trying to get her to like you. That will make you needy and she'll smell that shit from a mile away. Learn humor and playful disagreeableness, teasing, and flirting, usually in that order. That will give you that "spark" feeling where its not just a platonic conversation. Learn to touch more, especially playfully in early-stage interactions. Most guys dont touch at ALL and then s…
/r/seduction17/07/26 07:15 AM
2

That's okay, you don't have to hire a dating coach. A coach just makes things easier, but it's not required for you to make improvements. Do 20-50 approaches per week and focus on the social skills youre trying to learn, not whether the girl likes you. For most guys, that means working on things like: overcoming the anxiety to approach, your posture, smile, emoting, sounding sure of yourself, the ability to keep a conversation going, the ability to feel what she's feeling, a sense of humor and a…
/r/ExRedPill17/07/26 03:26 AM
4

Fantastic observation
/r/seduction17/07/26 12:51 AM
2

No one said everyone needs to do cold approach. Most people don't. Which is also why you're not seeing "regular people" do it very often. Extremely high level of difficulty for something that has arguably unjustified payoffs if you're already a "normal guy" who can get into relationships without doing anything different. Dating coaching is the same way. Average guy doesn't need it just like the average guy doesn't need an MMA coach or an oncologist or a dietician. But if youre in a group or clas…
/r/ExRedPill16/07/26 08:24 PM
2

Average guy / average layman
/r/ExRedPill16/07/26 08:11 PM
2

Its too difficult and niche for regular people to do it, man. That's why you're only encountering niche communities for it. It's like saying you really want to learn how to punch people in the face but the only people who want to teach it are boxers, boxing coaches, and MMA people. There's a reason for that.
/r/ExRedPill16/07/26 05:59 AM
1

"When in doubt, do the approach"
/r/seduction14/07/26 08:52 AM
1

Yup, it's just practice. Improv, standup, and social skills classes help as well, but ultimately it's down to number of reps and time spent practicing. That's what moves the needle.
/r/seduction14/07/26 08:48 AM
2

You either were interacting with women at school or you already had a solid base of social skills. If you have neither, you have to approach (or otherwise find women to interact with) in order to practice what you read. For the vast majority of guys here, reading without practicing it will just get them in their head and make them worse due to analysis paralysis.
/r/seduction13/07/26 04:30 AM
1

Neil mainly iterated off of Mystery's stuff because Neil wasnt around all that long. A few years or so. Mystery developed his method from 10+ years of cold approaching + being autistic and recognizing the patterns. The core principles are WAY too extensive to write in a reddit post. Do some searching here and you'll find more than enough information. Your best bet is to read ONE book (Mystery's, Mark Manson's, etc) and then immediately go out and start practicing it. You get 95% of your skill de…
/r/seduction13/07/26 04:18 AM
2

Just an FYI -- reading without approaching will make you worse than not reading at all.
/r/seduction13/07/26 04:15 AM
77

Routines are too weird in the bedroom because it means you're not calibrating to her, youre doing a routine. Focus instead on guidelines: * 20-30 minutes minimum on foreplay unless she's begging you not to. * Vast vast majority of women love kissing and love being kissed on the neck. It's a very very safe move to start because almost every girl likes it. * Try to make her orgasm at least once before penetration because it will double or triple the probability she orgasms from the actual sex as w…
/r/seduction13/07/26 03:57 AM
2

its because youre asking too many questions, youre asking boring questions, and youre asking questions you dont actually care much about. Combine those and the energy dies FAST. Keep in mind in a higher energy club type environment you also have to keep small talk to a bare minimum because you have to complete with insane environmental stimuli.
/r/seduction13/07/26 03:50 AM
3

Aim for 20-50 approaches a week. That's the sweet spot to make meaningful improvements. Less than that and it's like going to the gym twice a month: Better than nothing, but youre not going to make great progress that way. As for knowing how to respond, it does come down to practice and reps and experience. I started out having NO IDEA how to respond to things and got better over time. Here are some examples of where I would take your example on Japan. It's a bit easier for me because I'm Japane…
/r/seduction13/07/26 03:42 AM
2

How many approaches are you doing per week? Also, be careful of spamming mini cold reads. It's very transparent to women that you are running out of things to say. Good options for responses are: Strong opinions on the subject: Medium difficulty, medium effectiveness Questions you're genuinely curious about: Low-medium difficulty, medium effectiveness Funny teasing or witty comments: high difficulty, high effectiveness Bad options: Questions you don't give a shit about, just to keep the conversa…
/r/seduction13/07/26 02:29 AM
5

You get comfortable with uncomfortable situations by practicing them over and over again. There's no shortcut to that process.
/r/seduction12/07/26 08:29 AM
1

It depends. Is he doing 20-50 approaches expecting to get immediate results despite starting from scratch and having significant disadvantages? If so, then yes, he will get discouraged and probably quit. But that also means a beginner weightlifter who expects to bench press 2x his body weight in the first week will also get discouraged and quit, too. The idea of doing approaches is not to get "results" with women, especially right away. Approaches are done in order to learn a SKILL SET of being …
/r/seduction12/07/26 05:40 AM
-1

I'm using the definition from early 2000s era pickup when it was first created and when I got my start. The subculture has definitely splintered in a lot of different directions, most of which are not particularly healthy. FYI pickup does NOT teach hypergamy or spinning plates or the idea that women dont commit to low status men. That's red pill, not pickup. You're getting your subcultures mixed up.
/r/ExRedPill11/07/26 08:11 AM
2

Pickup and redpill share some similarities but are fundamentally different philosophies. It's like saying "can i be anti-taliban if i'm muslim?" Yes, because islam is not taliban/terrorism. And pickup is not redpill. The central philosophy behind pickup is: "if youre an awkward dork with no social skills and confidence, work on yourself and learn to talk to women through repetition in order to effectively interact with them." The central philosophy behind RedPill is: "women and feminism are the …
/r/ExRedPill11/07/26 07:46 AM
1

Haha thanks dude. Havent rocked the mohawk in years. Your list is good, but i wouldnt say that's a high ROI list. Your list is a COMPREHENSIVE list. It's pretty much every single thing you could do to improve your social life: the major things, the minor things, and everything in between. I didn't include things like environment or positioning or social proof because while they're useful, theyre not what i would describe as "the few inputs that drive most of the outcomes."
/r/seduction10/07/26 02:27 AM
3

Most of history's biggest and most impressive feats of achievement are due in large part to the very hormones and drive to impress, sleep with, and marry beautiful women. Scientists often argue that the drive to have sex with attractive women is largely what has kept our species alive.
/r/seduction08/07/26 08:19 AM
5

yeah its a bizarrely un-self-aware subculture
/r/seduction07/07/26 10:59 AM
7

I HAVE built a world-class system over the last 2 decades of coaching so this is not a hypothetical for me. However, the highest impact / highest ROI activities depend HEAVILY on your starting point. 6'2" 20 year old college football player about to go pro is going to have a VERY different experience than 5'1" autistic man from India with a heavy accent and learning disability. You cant give those guys the same things to focus on. I specialize primarily in helping the 2nd group of guys, guys who…
/r/seduction07/07/26 10:40 AM
3

FYI this is primarily a sub aimed at men. There are a handful of women here but if youre trying to get a randomized cross section of the female population (which is statistically important if youre going to extrapolate the data to the broader population), i wouldnt ask here because the women here are self-selected (and therefore not randomized), and the sample is going to be too small.
/r/seduction07/07/26 10:21 AM
13

I think its hilariously ironic that blackpill/incels claim to be experts on how women behave when they've never been with one.
/r/seduction07/07/26 10:15 AM
8

Those days did suck, but man was it exhilarating at times. It felt like we were lewis and clark discovering the new world. The first time I ever pulled it was the most exciting thing that had ever happened to me in my life. I thought I had developed x-men mutant powers. Though admittedly we also had the social sophistication (including coaches) of a cockroach. So give and take i guess.
/r/seduction07/07/26 10:12 AM
2

Youre going to need to give us a bit of context (like what city youre in) because I'm going to guess that what works in Los Angeles may not work in Saudia Arabia or North Korea. That said, if we're talking about western countries, generally the structure goes: Small talk Transition to normal conversation Playful / Teasing / Humor Flirting Invite to something Exchange contact information In that order. You progress to each step once the previous one goes okay or you get investment from it. So for…
/r/seduction06/07/26 08:55 AM
1

Game (like swimming, basketball, martial arts, or counter-strike) is a set of skills, not an inborn ethereal trait that all men possess from birth. It's like saying skilled fighting is inborn, its innate, you are just born knowing how to throw a jab correctly and how to execute a guillotine effectively, because it's part of your genetic makeup. No. It. Is. Not. Skills are learned, whether in childhood or adulthood. You have to learn it somewhere. And if you didnt learn it in adolescence, you hav…
/r/seduction06/07/26 04:48 AM
2

Failure is NOT failing to get a girl to like you. Failure is failing to challenge yourself and put in the reps. Doing hard reps makes you better. That's the metric you need to use, not whether women like you or not.
/r/seduction06/07/26 04:44 AM
1

give us specific context, demographics, and wording. That information is important because it allows us to calibrate.
/r/seduction06/07/26 02:56 AM
1

FYI at a certain level you stop running out of things to say. I cant recall the last time it's happened to me. It's probably been over a decade now since I last experienced that. So it is something that completely disappears after a certain point.
/r/seduction06/07/26 02:52 AM
3

You must be new here. 90%+ of the guys here are low self esteem. That's why they're here. This isnt a sub of players trading advanced techniques to seduce 10s. This is a group of guys who are mostly socially awkward, shy, timid, low self esteem, and often autistic and are struggling to get more than a few dates per year, if that. No disrespect to anyone here, because that's exactly where I came from as well. But ive been around for a couple of decades now and this subculture has always been guys…
/r/seduction05/07/26 09:17 AM
-3

Not every post longer than 100 words is AI. Nothing about this writing style sounds even remotely like AI.
/r/seduction05/07/26 09:14 AM
2

Youre vaguely describing a collection of issues with calibration and inexperience. It's not one thing you're doing wrong. It's dozens of things all collectively causing problems. The solution is to interact with dozens of women a week (likely through cold approach, though i dont know your situation, country, location, etc). Once you're getting this quantity, then start analyzing your interactions to figure out specific weaknesses and work on them individually until you start making measurable im…
/r/seduction05/07/26 09:10 AM
9

Yes. Results or Comfort. Pick one.
/r/seduction05/07/26 09:06 AM
5

Running out of things to say is a beginner sticking point. But you're asking how to learn advanced techniques through a video course to operate at the highest level of the skill set. This is like saying "i dont know how to throw a jab because ive never boxed before but im going to buy a video course on how to win olympic gold as a boxer, which olympic boxing course should i buy?" Answer: None Go do your first 100 approaches first. If you have no idea what to say, search this sub. PLENTY of infor…
/r/seduction05/07/26 09:04 AM
3

Game in general is your ability to leverage social skills, influence, persuasion, and charisma (and all of the sub-skills involved in those macro skills) to date or seduce women you shouldn't be able to date/seduce. Generally this results in being able to date women out of your league or who otherwise wouldn't be attracted to you. The more advanced your game is, the more able you are to do this successfully. So for example if you were a little person (4'4" or so) and you dated women out of your …
/r/seduction05/07/26 08:59 AM
11

No, that's not advanced. That's EFFICIENT. Not the same thing. Do some advanced guys look for women who are into them? Sure, but that's not what MAKES him advanced. Doing something that an advanced guy might do is correlation, not causation. For example, skilled martial artists usually have black belts. So therefore, if you buy a black belt, youre a skilled martial artist, right? Advanced is your ability to punch above your weight. To date or sleep with women who are out of your league from an a…
/r/seduction05/07/26 06:02 AM
1

More approaches, less reading and watching youtube. As Mystery used to say, "The answer to your questions are all found infield"
/r/seduction05/07/26 05:57 AM
1

You just outed yourself as someone who doesnt cold approach.
/r/seduction05/07/26 05:55 AM
22

That's not advanced. That's a guy who is running around looking for women who like him. Nothing inherently wrong with that strategy, but it doesnt mean he's advanced. Quite the opposite in most cases. That's like saying an advanced martial artist is a guy who only tries to spar with people worse than him or smaller than him, and quits sparring as soon as he realizes his opponent is either bigger or better.
/r/seduction05/07/26 05:52 AM
–

I thought the same thing
/r/ExRedPill05/07/26 05:03 AM
–

Yeah hypergamy is a well studied phenomenon in anthropology. It's something the red pill co-opted (and twisted) in order to justify their hate for women, but they didnt make it up.
/r/ExRedPill05/07/26 05:02 AM
3

Jordan Peterson hates the red pill and pickup artists. The only thing he has in common with red pill is that they both have diasagreements with modern feminism. But so does demi moore, lady gaga, and Meryl Streep, but you wouldnt say that theyre red pill. There are plenty of individual things that the red pill believes that are "true". After all, a broken clock is correct twice a day. The problem isn't that everything they say is absolutely wrong, its that everything they say is done -- through …
/r/ExRedPill05/07/26 12:35 AM
1

This is the right answer. The problem isnt insufficient information. The problem is trying to sift through TOO MUCH information, and BAD INFORMATION to figure out what information is useful/applicable for you. Use information to troubleshoot specific sticking points, not as an excuse to procrastinate from getting started.
/r/seduction03/07/26 08:04 PM
1

CA and NV. Lets take this offline so we aren't spamming this thread. Send me a message.
/r/seduction01/07/26 11:54 PM
1

West Coast
/r/seduction01/07/26 09:51 PM
2

It's both. It's like any other skill. You get a sense of what will work and what won't based on experience and heuristics. I did martial arts for over a decade. If you show me a move I've never done before I can roughly approximate if that would work in real life or if it's bullshit. That's how all the martial artists know that Steven Seagal is bullshit and that the stuff the Detroit Urban Survival Training guy teaches wouldn't work in real life.
/r/seduction01/07/26 08:41 PM
1

This actually isn't bad as an opener (at night, don't do this during day time) if your delivery is strong. It's definitely something I can see working. If you have at least a few thousand cold approach sets under your belt you can probably visualize this working but if you don't, this is just going to sound super weird to you. That's the difference between experienced practitioner and keyboard jockey.
/r/seduction01/07/26 06:14 PM
2

You should join, it's a good group. I guest coach there the last week of the month to help out so if you pop in, DM me and let me know who you are so that I can say hello. He doesn't live in the U.S. so live coaching is hard for him to do unless people are willing to travel far. He usually refers students to me for live training when I have the time.
/r/seduction01/07/26 06:08 PM
1

Yeah he was my old student. Good guy. I sometimes pop in to guest coach for him in his coaching program.
/r/seduction01/07/26 07:23 AM
2

Your vocabulary tells me you're getting a lot of your base information from 2005-era pickup. I would encourage you to update your knowledge base. A lot of what we thought was correct in that time frame has been proven wrong over the subsequent years or has been updated with newer, more accurate information. Her response that she feels pressured and that everyone will know tells me that there are likely two issues: You're pushing too hard without respecting her comfort levels. You're trying to "g…
/r/seduction30/06/26 07:29 PM
1

you need to figure out the reason WHY she's pulling away. Are you making her uncomfortable? Does your breath smell? Are you coming on too strong? Is she afraid of your judgment for sleeping with you? Is she a virgin saving herself for marriage? You have to get the diagnosis right before you can find a solution.
/r/seduction30/06/26 07:20 PM
1

Yeah it's quite a niche. It's even narrower than that because it's mostly asian/indian software developers who are from another country and don't know how to dress. The reason it takes 2 days is because we have to spend the entire first day on haircuts, shaving, grooming, buying an entire new wardrobe, etc. These are guys who have been wearing free XXL microsoft and google t-shirts they got from work their entire life so in order to make the photos work we first have to get them clothes that are…
/r/seduction30/06/26 06:44 PM
1

Im sorry, are you also a professional photographer with a proven track record and over a decade of experience working with men who are struggling with online dating photos?
/r/seduction30/06/26 06:00 PM
3

yeah, stay far far away from the corners of the internet that preach these bullshit beliefs. They are beliefs designed to reinforce their ideology and/or make them money, not beliefs designed to help you or show you the truth.
/r/seduction30/06/26 11:07 AM
3

You almost never end up with your dream girl before you're ready. If you meet her before you have the skills to get her, you're going to fuck it up, almost 100%. It makes sense if you think about it. Look at my situation. When I started as a student, I was 5'4", asian, not very good looking, not rich, not famous, and grew up timid, shy, lacking in self esteem, low confidence, and shit game/social skills. Do you think I'm going to be able to get Nikki (my SO in my PFP) just from pure luck? Not a …
/r/seduction30/06/26 10:36 AM
1

Does it work? Yes, if you do it correctly. Is it ethical? Eh... that's questionable, though it depends heavily on your ethical framework. The bigger issue is that online dating is becoming less and less viable if you want to really get good. So it's kind of a thing where you might get some temporary results from it but it likely wont bring you closer to your goal if you want to be good.
/r/seduction30/06/26 05:54 AM
1

Yeah people are abusing terms like gaslighting/literally/narcissism so much that theyre starting to lose their meaning.
/r/seduction30/06/26 05:30 AM
1

I do professional online dating photography as part of my job and it often takes 2 full days, 5 wardrobe changes, 4 locations, 18 months of personal training in the gym + diet, and a lot of money to get the same results as what AI can do with some experienced prompt engineering and know-how. Don't get me wrong, I still dont LIKE or advocate for the use of using AI-generated images, but Id be lying to you if i told you that it wasnt effective.
/r/seduction30/06/26 05:26 AM
1

I dislike AI photos but I'd be lying if i told you that the new generation of AI image generators is easy to distinguish from real life. I've been fooled SO MANY TIMES by it, and I'm pretty good at being able to identify AI. The old generators were easy. The new ones are getting harder and harder to tell.
/r/seduction30/06/26 05:22 AM
1

I have objections with literally every single line in this entire post. That takes talent.
/r/seduction30/06/26 05:13 AM
3

India. He said in the OP.
/r/seduction30/06/26 05:11 AM
1

Don't go down the bitter-angry-red-pill-man-who-hates-women route. It will fuck you up long term, will damage your long term relationships, and will REPEL women from you in the short term because they can smell the bitterness on you. You know how some women fucking hate men and resent the fuck out of them and blame everything on how men are trash? You know how you can sense this from a mile away? Dont be the man version of that, because women will also sense that from a mile away.
/r/seduction30/06/26 05:00 AM
21

Yes, its in your head. Women aren't calculating things like that, theyre mostly going off of vibe and emotions in the moment. You're exhibiting signs of nervousness most likely and theyre responding to that.
/r/seduction30/06/26 12:02 AM
1

You dont have high standards. You have approach anxiety. Approach everyone, regardless of what they look like. The only thing that matters when you're new is getting your reps in.
/r/seduction29/06/26 11:42 PM
7

doesnt matter, the advice is solid
/r/seduction29/06/26 11:39 PM
1

Sort of. The problem is that youre in a vicious cycle. You dont believe that women will like you, so you dont talk to women. And then that seems to "prove" that women dont like you, so you feel that even stronger, which causes you to want to talk to women even LESS, and the cycle continues. You cant break this cycle by magically changing your beliefs overnight. It doesnt work because you have a lifetime of reference experience that it's true. So to break it, you have to simultaneously show yours…
/r/seduction25/06/26 08:47 AM
1

would need way more information to give you a specific and detailed game plan, but generically speaking, the best way to get over this is: Cognitive behavioral therapy, ideally from a CBT-trained therapist + real world evidence from coaches who will force you to talk to women so that your real-life evidence conflicts with your beliefs and as a result, your beliefs start to crumble.
/r/seduction25/06/26 08:25 AM
2

yeah agreed. I group receptivity into hard yes, soft yes, undecided, soft no, hard no. The thing is, the vast majority of women fall into the middle 3 categories, and thats where your skill set has a very large influence on the outcome. But because most guys do not have a high skill level, approaching starts to look like a game of luck/numbers game much in the same way that poker looks like a game of luck when you suck at it.
/r/seduction21/06/26 12:53 AM
1

I dont think its even about do your reps (for practice and skill acquisition). Only a handful of us are promoting that idea and the idea that you can actually create attraction (and become a better person). Now it seems more like "game doesnt work, its purely a numbers game" and "the girl either likes you or not but you cant influence that"
/r/seduction20/06/26 11:31 PM
10

Fucking TRUTH BOMBS over here
/r/seduction20/06/26 11:27 PM
1

Yup. Timidness isnt subtle though. It's so obvious that ANYONE can see it coming a mile away. I can see timidness just from 2 seconds of a guy's walk from 50 feet away. Not sure where you're from but in America, we have a lot of homeless people asking for money in larger cities and the ones who are timid get ignored while the ones who are assertiveness may not get everyone giving them money, but they at least get a response from people. Same principle.
/r/seduction20/06/26 04:54 AM
1

Sort of. Being a good communicator with good general social skills is important. But so is being effective when communicating with WOMEN. Both problems/skills are fixed by doing a shitload of interactions to get enough practice reps to improve. Hence, 20-50 interactions a week.
/r/seduction20/06/26 04:31 AM
3

You only hate it because of what you think it means (e.g., "women are manipulative and conniving with unrealistically high standards because their nature is to find the 'highest value man' and ignore everyone else.") Thats classic red pill bullshit and it's wrong. That's not what it means. The hypocrisy is that almost all men do exactly the same thing, but instead of social status, it's looks. How many men would prefer to date women more attractive than themselves? Oh, i dont know, maybe 99.9%? …
/r/ExRedPill19/06/26 11:23 AM
3

It's a real phenomenon in several fields of scientific study, yes. But is it the same thing as what all the red pill guys claim it is? No. Red pill guys cherry pick data in order to suit their agenda and ignore all of the parts that inconveniently go against their narrative. Very intellectually dishonest.
/r/ExRedPill19/06/26 10:39 AM
0

The definition depends on the context. Most of the time in coaching, we refer to the Masculine and the Feminine in terms of spirituality / eastern philosophy, with a little bit of jungian psychology relationship science mixed in. From this perspective, the Masculine and the Feminine are two polar opposites or extremes, like north/south, or positive/negative, or 0 / 1. This is the essence of the yin and the yang in eastern philosophy. Men and women generally have both polarities, though men tend …
/r/ExRedPill19/06/26 08:23 AM
2

lol hypergamy is an anthropology concept that women tend to date men who are similar or higher social status because of historical inequalities and evolutionary necessity. It has nothing to do with being physically stronger and opening jars
/r/ExRedPill19/06/26 08:15 AM
1

Yup, one guy is 5'2". It's definitely hard. Several of the guys are also autistic so that makes it even harder. But they still do it, and they even get dates and sex from it, which is impressive given what they're up against. Approach to date ratio is a worthless vanity metric that causes big problems, so we don't measure it. It's EXTREMELY easy to game the system because it's too difficult to control the necessary variables. I'll give you an example: If I was single right now, I could do an app…
/r/seduction17/06/26 08:25 AM
16

Good shit, man. 20-50 interactions a week over a few years will RADICALLY change almost any man's dating life. It's just hard, so most people won't do it.
/r/seduction17/06/26 08:13 AM
13

I've opened women accidentally many, many times because they looked early 20s but ended up being 15 or 16. If you're not sure, after the opener just ask. If she's underage, just laugh and politely excuse yourself. It's never been an actual issue outside of personal embarrassment the first few times it happens. Don't let age be an excuse not to approach (unless she clearly looks like an actual child) because approach anxiety takes many forms, and this is one of them. My rule was if i'm not 100% s…
/r/seduction17/06/26 08:11 AM
1

I dont know who that guy is, but i can tell you that he's a garbage coach. But you already knew that. Indians are indeed experiencing a lot of racism right now, but 90% of it is online. In real life my indian students (some who are shorter than you and i) are cold approaching women all over the united states and they're experiencing no more racism than at any other point in the past. So dont assume that online = real life
/r/seduction17/06/26 07:35 AM
2

Oh if youre saying that having poor social skills might make people THINK this whole thing is a scam, then sure, I agree. But that doesnt mean it is, it means people are mistaken. Your original comment was that learning pickup is a scam if your social skills are below a critical baseline. It's not a scam, it's just difficult. Not the same thing. Just like if youre obese, getting into shape isnt a scam. It's just really hard to do because youre starting out at 450 lbs.
/r/seduction17/06/26 02:04 AM
2

It hasn't changed much. It's just more difficult because gen-z and younger millenials grew up with screens instead of human interaction. But fundamentally the social skill deficiency is the same. You dont need to be on gear to put on some basic muscle and lose fat. Just because some fitness influencers are on gear doesnt mean the gym is a scam. The point still stand that if you work out for 15 years and are still weak and fat, youre doing something wrong, and it has nothing to do with steroids.
/r/seduction16/06/26 06:23 PM
1

I'm not really concerned with getting laid, I'm concerned with being GOOD. Because if getting laid is the only goal, then just pay for it and dont waste time trying to learn skills. That being said, you dont always need humor, but humor has been proven to be one of the most effective, reliable, and repeatable ways to trigger the investment necessary to create attraction when cold approaching and/or interacting with women. So it's a foundational skill that everyone should possess if they want to …
/r/seduction16/06/26 11:09 AM
3

You: "Nowhere did I explicitly say that nobody needs a different method." Also You: "I got better simply through socializing more and feeling what worked and what didn’t. Also You: "Again, people do this normally. They don’t need coaches or teachers to realize they’ve said or done something awkward, or said something that people thought was cool or funny." No, you did not EXPLICITLY say that nobody needs a different method, but you absolutely presented that argument, as you can see from your quo…
/r/seduction16/06/26 10:16 AM
3

The main flaw in the argument you're presenting is: "I did X and it worked, so no one else needs Y because X will work for everyone just like it worked for me." In the field of study of informal logic/critical thinking, this is a fallacy of hasty generalization -- it is the logical error of assuming that if something worked for you, it MUST be the optimal solution for everyone else, regardless of differing genetics, upbringing, disabilities, skill level, or situation. But even anecdotally, and o…
/r/seduction16/06/26 09:21 AM
3

This is a really well-written and well-thought out post, u/SoccerSkilz, and you're 100% right that the main meta problem is an unwillingness to put in the work. However, there are absolutely secondary/tertiary variables here that you might not be considering and that most guys aren't really aware of until you've been working with students for a long time: 1. Disabilities A VERY largely percentage of guys struggling with dating who find their way to spaces and subcultures like this are not "norma…
/r/seduction16/06/26 09:00 AM
1

You're 100% correct. This is why "relying on instinct" doesnt work when you dont have the correct instincts yet. I'm sure you know this already, but the main coping strategy that psychologists teach when working with a patient on the spectrum is to break down social interactions into algorithms and structures that autistic people can understand and practice and implement. Which is PRECISELY what most of pick up is.
/r/seduction16/06/26 08:29 AM
3

You can use any skill-based analogy and it's the same outcome: Stand up comedy. Public Speaking. Sales. To make significant improvement or to operate at a high level, all of these skills require conscious practice, study, correction of your mistakes, and usually coaching or mentoring from people better than you. You don't get significantly better at ANY of these skills by "just doing and saying the things you feel in the moment" unless you are VERY naturally talented (or have significant previou…
/r/seduction16/06/26 08:25 AM
1

If you're not experiencing success 15 years in, you're doing something wrong. There are plenty of unscrupulous scammers in this industry, but there are also a lot of scammers in the fitness industry, but i wouldnt say that going to the gym is a scam. And if you work out for 15 year and are still weak and fat, it doesnt mean the gym is a scam. It means you're doing something wrong.
/r/seduction16/06/26 05:57 AM
6

Not sure about your journey, man, but i got into pickup PRECISELY to learn the social skills i didnt have. I didn't come in as a normal guy who just wanted to get better. I came in as a virgin who had never held a girl's hand and couldn't keep a conversation going to save my life. Doing tens of thousands of approaches and working with the best coaches in my day was exactly what i needed to learn the social skills i never developed as a kid, so that wasnt a prerequisite, that was the goal itself.
/r/seduction16/06/26 05:52 AM
6

This is exactly what naturals believe because it works for naturals. But it doesn't work for synthetics / non-naturals. Imagine telling a guy who is brand new to basketball, "Stop trying to improve at shooting free throws, or practicing dribbling, or working on your jump shot. That's all nonsense. Just believe in yourself and be confident, and the ball will go in"
/r/seduction16/06/26 05:44 AM
3

Yuuuuuup. This is the real shit.
/r/seduction16/06/26 05:40 AM
3

Yes, but somewhere along the line, bitter, angry dudes with no skill showed up, convinced that this skill is just a numbers game of running around looking for girls who like you. It's only a numbers game if you suck at it. Just like a poker is only a game of luck if you're bad at poker.
/r/seduction16/06/26 05:40 AM
5

What you guys aren't getting is that the large quantity of approaches is NOT to get laid. It's for SKILL ACQUISITION. So you dont need to approach just hot women. You also need to approach ugly women. And average looking women. And women in groups. And women who only date other women. And women who are with guys. And large groups of women. And large groups of guys. And old people. And young (18+) people. Bottom line, you need to approach PEOPLE IN GENERAL Because you don't need hot girls to fix …
/r/seduction16/06/26 05:35 AM
1

Most guys are struggling to get more than 5 matches a week. How exactly are they supposed to send messages to 100 women?
/r/seduction16/06/26 05:25 AM
4

If you want to operate in a bar, you have to: Be loud Be assertive (if you come in timid, you'll get ignored) Be able to open mixed sets (groups of girls + guys) Note: If your ears ring when you leave the bar, either wear earplugs (the plugs will filter out most of the music but you should still be able to hear people when they talk to you) or go to another bar. That "ringing" is hearing damage.
/r/seduction14/06/26 10:19 AM
0

Humor/playful/teasing comes before flirting. If you can't make the girl laugh on command, repeatedly, dont worry about flirting right now. You're skipping steps in the process.
/r/seduction14/06/26 10:15 AM
1

You're spot on with the point of seduction. This entire sub has turned into a bunch of guys running around hoping that girls like them so that they have permission to do something and dont have to risk too much rejection.
/r/seduction14/06/26 08:40 AM
1

"Very little of a skill is genetic" doesnt mean "insanely talented individuals dont have an advantage." That's not what that means. It means that the vast majority of the skill set that you see guys possess is learned, not inherited. Here's how I know that (aside from the mountain of academic / scientific evidence): In decades of coaching, I have yet to meet a single guy who is super skilled socially and with women, but has near-zero social/dating experience. The closest I ever saw was my old wi…
/r/seduction13/06/26 11:01 PM
2

monotone/flat affect (common with autism) does indeed make things more difficult when conveying humor, but it is not an impossibility. Otherwise conveying humor over text would be impossible. You can either use more of a deadpan style of humor, a more content-based humor, or you can go to speech therapy to learn how to improve your voice tone.
/r/seduction13/06/26 10:13 PM
11

you think 100% of humor is sarcasm? Hint: its not An ability to make people laugh by doing a trump impersonation does not make you witty. it means you able to do a trump impersonation. Not the same thing. You dont need a certain voice to convey sarcasm. I've been coaching guys on humor and social skills for over 2 decades and I have NEVER seen an inability to convey sarcasm because someone's voice is not good enough.
/r/seduction13/06/26 09:26 PM
21

Very little of it is genetic. It's mostly learned social skills + learned confidence. If you don't have that confidence and social skills, start learning. Confidence comes from doing things that scare you and getting good at things. Social skills come from learning humor, wittiness, free association, active listening, storytelling, etc.
/r/seduction13/06/26 09:13 PM
4

It's both. Sexual tension is the tension that exists when there's a sense of mutual attraction and a feeling that something might happen but it hasnt yet. That's why you have a lot of sexual tension with someone youre flirting with in a club, but very little sexual tension with someone you just had sex with. Think of sexual tension as the sexual version of the physical tension you feel when someone gets in your face and you know you're about to fight. Most people rely on sexual tension happening…
/r/seduction13/06/26 08:12 PM
1

For 99% of men the answer comes down to fear and the various manifestations of that fear. Almost every other excuse is just a manifestation of fear.
/r/seduction12/06/26 11:33 PM
1

Keep practicing. You can read books or hire a coach or watch youtube videos to assist with the process of understanding the mechanisms, but at the end of the day you will still need to put in thousands of reps in order to build this skill set. There is no scenario where you can fix this problem without practicing.
/r/seduction12/06/26 11:29 PM
23

Hahahahaha that translation was spot on
/r/seduction12/06/26 10:22 PM
2

Running around looking for girls who like you is not game. Just like "spraying the entire area with thousands of rounds of machine gun fire hoping to hit something" is not "sniping."
/r/seduction12/06/26 06:48 AM
1

ABC is largely considered to be "amateur advice" among professionals in sales and the same logic applies in dating.
/r/seduction10/06/26 05:30 AM
-1

You could also find a local coach who is good and pay them to go infield with you to do a root cause analysis. Expensive but may be worth it if you have the disposable income
/r/seduction09/06/26 11:25 PM
2

Yes you have it mostly right, but youre building more wide rapport in emotional connection rather than DEEP rapport. You want both, but missing deep rapport (usually through vulnerability) usually translates to "oh he's cool, i like him" (wide rapport) rather than "omg he's AMAZING" (deep rapport). Deep rapport (as its name implies) tends to be connecting on a much deeper level. Have you ever talk to a woman and you start to really open up and it feels like you and her are the only people in the…
/r/seduction09/06/26 10:27 PM
2

Yeah it could be a mistake youre making if youre getting this a LOT. This is a thing, but it should be happening on occasion, not constantly. If youre seeing it constantly, it's likely another root cause.
/r/seduction09/06/26 09:29 PM
1

Get close to her, make strong eye contact (hold for a few seconds), and if she doesnt flinch or pull back, touch her face (usually palm towards her face, fingers up, almost like holding the side of her face near cheek/ear) or hold her chin gently (between thumb and index) and move forward to kiss her. If she doesnt want to kiss you, you'll know because she'll pull away or get uncomfortable the moment you get close or keep strong eye contact with her. Oh and try not to kiss at the car at the end …
/r/seduction09/06/26 09:12 PM
3

Thanks dude. Yeah it probably took me about 10 years of coaching before i figured out a good analogy for it too haha.
/r/seduction09/06/26 09:09 PM
1

It's nuanced. Both can be true, depending on your performance and ability. In MOST cases, people are very very poor actors and cannot hide their insecurities well, so your friend is mostly correct in that sense, especially if he's saying he thinks YOU can't pull it off. But here's the other side of the coin: I've spoken at dating/pickup conventions and on stages with hundreds of people in the audience and i'm nervous EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. And no one can tell. When I tell people I was nervous on s…
/r/seduction09/06/26 08:56 PM
9

There's nothing wrong with you. This is just a skill deficiency. Or in this specific case, it could be literally anything. Don't make any conclusions based off of a single data point or small sample size, because the root cause could be anything, including the cycle of the moon. Like i've been in this exact same scenario before and learned years later that the reason it happened is because the next day her ex called and wanted to get back together and she wanted to give him a chance. Is that a n…
/r/seduction09/06/26 08:40 PM
22

Female attraction is fleeting, especially at night and especially when alcohol is involved. This is why you have to solidify attraction with an emotional connection. Without that, you're gambling that the attraction lasts longer than that night, and it often doesn't. Female attraction feels sort of like male horniness. It might be there one night when youre drunk and talking to someone who turns you on, but no guarantees that tomorrow afternoon it's still there as you're grocery shopping.
/r/seduction09/06/26 08:32 PM
3

A 9 without a hot body is not a 9. She's a 6
/r/seduction09/06/26 08:28 PM
3

I was looking for this comment lol
/r/seduction09/06/26 05:12 AM
4

I keep saying this over and over again because it's true: 20-50 approaches a week. That's how you improve.
/r/seduction09/06/26 05:12 AM
8

No. Shyness is not a personality characteristic. It is a bad habit. You don't need to change your personality. You need to eliminate bad habits and acquire better social skills.
/r/seduction09/06/26 05:11 AM
2

It sounds like you were never really successful with dating, even 5-6 years ago? If that's the case, then the issue isnt "something is going wrong now," its that there has always been a skill / confidence deficiency from the beginning. Your friends who are more successful are either better looking, taller, higher social status, or more skilled. Thats why theyre getting results where you aren't.
/r/seduction09/06/26 12:20 AM
1

Not just that, but because it's uncreative and boring unless youre advanced and can make it super interesting with just pure personality and social skills. Compare that to, say, axe throwing or gun range. Even if you suck at conversation, the event itself is still fun, engaging, and interesting. The event helps you with both conversation and connecting whereas with dinner, it's 100% on you. Nothing to help you. Nothing to bail you out if you run out of things to say.
/r/seduction06/06/26 07:48 PM
1

It's not weird in a bar as long as you order something if you're getting her something. It's definitely weird in social circle and/or dates though. For those you gotta just fake it. Order a tonic/lime or if you have to, order a regular CLEAR alcoholic drink (if at a bar) and go to the bathroom and dump it out and refill with water but keep the lime. If you're at dinner (try to avoid dinner dates unless you're advanced btw), it's less of an issue because it's not weird to order something non alco…
/r/seduction06/06/26 08:02 AM
3

Im allergic to alcohol. Tonic and lime or lemon lime bitters (less common in the US unfortunately) was my go-to. So many girls would ask what it was and I said "try it" and they'd say, "oh it's a vodka tonic."
/r/seduction06/06/26 07:56 AM
1

This IS Fuji
/r/seduction05/06/26 05:23 PM
1

Using AI to write this doesnt help with credibility FYI
/r/seduction05/06/26 07:22 AM
2

I'm not making bold claims on my personal account. And if I did, with a hidden history, you SHOULD be cautious about believing it because you have no idea who I am or if i know what im talking about.
/r/seduction05/06/26 05:55 AM
1

This is true, but the inverse is rarely true. I've met a ton of guys who were great with women but couldnt coach for shit, but i havent met a single incel/virgin who was a great coach.
/r/seduction05/06/26 12:26 AM
3

You absolutely will experience resistance towards creating a new self image. It's your old self image desperately trying to self-preserve. The people around you will also resist the new you. They will often say shit like "stop trying to be someone youre not." Most will criticize you for trying to improve. They want you to "stay in your lane." The key is remembering that youre "acting as if" not to be inauthentic, but as a way to reinforce new habits and mindsets in order to actually improve. Thi…
/r/seduction04/06/26 08:17 PM
10

OP, this concept is called "confirmation bias." It's dead on accurate. You latch onto any anecdote that confirms your belief, and you dismiss any anecdote that argues against it.
/r/ExRedPill04/06/26 08:09 PM
5

Funny related story from back in the day. When I first started coaching in the mid to late 2000s (under a fairly well known company at the time), i would sometimes go to my boss (the head coach) and say "hey some of the guys coming to the next boot camp are guys who are pretty advanced. I've read their posts on the forums on the number of women they've slept with and im afraid im not good enough to help them." He would tell me that let's reserve judgment until we met them in person. Then the stu…
/r/seduction04/06/26 07:00 PM
3

im very cautious about believing anything online, especially when someone makes bold claims but has a hidden history
/r/seduction04/06/26 06:53 PM
2

Yes but most of the time the guys who need the most advice on here are the guys who AREN'T doing that so kind of a catch 22
/r/seduction04/06/26 06:50 PM
1

Start easing into cold approaching, ramping up until you can hit 20-50 per week. That's your sweet spot.
/r/seduction04/06/26 05:53 PM
3

A lot of guys are offering advice here from a place of bitterness and being triggered by girls flaking. Understandable for sure, and no judgment from me at all, but if youre trying to improve, you want to focus on ACTING AS IF you are a secure, confident man who leads and has abundance and who isnt bitter and angry at women for his inability to succeed with them. That man has no problem leading in a situation like this because he doesn't interpret every little thing as a slight against him. It's…
/r/seduction04/06/26 05:47 PM
4

Yeah this is what my PSA a few days ago is about: Skill acquisition is the goal, not just looking for women who like you. That said, 99% of men don't approach more than single digits per YEAR, so there's definitely a case to be made for almost everyone just needing more volume.
/r/seduction04/06/26 03:30 PM
21

To a hammer, everything looks like a nail. If you resent women, everything about women gets twisted into "they're manipulative and evil" Not saying thats you, but that is the prevailing mentality behind red pill.
/r/ExRedPill04/06/26 02:39 PM
7

lol i literally just posted a PSA here about people thinking dating is a numbers game. That said, IMPROVING is definitely a numbers game because you need high numbers of reps in order to get the experience to make improvements in your skill set. That's why i tell guys to do 20-50 new interactions a week. But no one realistically does that and thats why its always been that 95% of guys in this community will never achieve their dating goals.
/r/seduction04/06/26 02:36 PM
2

Thanks man. Yeah a lot of it is because black pill ideology and mainstream dating ideas have both somewhat infiltrated this community, and both do not think it's possible to date out of your league using social skills and charisma, so you're getting a lot of that influence here now. You're right that MOST people only date people around their same level of attractiveness or lower, because it's the easiest, lowest-resistance way to date. Trying to date someone more attractive than you (especially …
/r/seduction02/06/26 11:50 PM
2

Continue talking to her and when you get investment (she's talking more, asking about you, investing in the conversation), invite her to something. Make it fun, unique, and low-investment. Not dinner or movies or something overdone. Yes, youre dead on with strong opinions. Practice them often (ideally 1-2 dozen times a day) because they are the backbone of conversation and the core reason behind why most guys struggle with conversation. And yes, most people who run out of things to say also supp…
/r/seduction02/06/26 02:56 AM
2

20-50 is if youre serious about improving. If youre just trying to have fun or find girls who like you, sure, its not a gym routine, it's a casual hobby. But it's 100% a gym routine (thats why its called training) if youre trying to get better.
/r/seduction02/06/26 01:58 AM
1

Thats like saying boxing is a skill, but its only a skill at being comfortable in your own skin and being confident that youre a good boxer
/r/seduction02/06/26 01:56 AM
1

oh i get notifications when you reply to me, even without a tag. Just not when you tag me in the main body of a post. Not sure why that is, some reddit bug i think.
/r/seduction01/06/26 10:45 PM
1

oh sorry i misread. Social skills/game are a series of skills. Social circle is an environment. You use social skills game IN social circle, theyre not direct competitors to each other. But if you forced me to choose only one, of course i'd choose social skills. Because social skills without a social circle is still viable. But social circle without social skills is a waste of time.
/r/seduction01/06/26 10:08 AM
1

SWEs have had an above-average rate of autism diagnoses WAY before covid. I was a software engineer in the early 2000s and it was prevalent then too. And the seduction community has always had a disproportioate number of autistic/ND folks. Just the nature of who needs help with dating. The virgin/BP/incel community is even worse. I swear like 95% of those communities are autistic.
/r/seduction31/05/26 09:23 PM
1

Social skills is a large component of game so theyre basically the same thing.
/r/seduction31/05/26 09:21 PM
0

Did your ex actually use it? Or was he just a clueless douchebag who tried to hit on women while you were together? I've been in a redpill-adjacent space for decades now so i know the redpill concepts well (i have to coach guys to get out of the redpill on a daily basis) and i have never heard of dread game being actually used IRL. It feels like a boogeyman -- something everyone is scared of but no one has ever really seen. That said, I work mostly with guys who cant get girlfriends though, so m…
/r/ExRedPill31/05/26 09:01 AM
3

lol if you think THIS is rocket science, it's a good thing you didn't read the rest of the mystery method. The mystery method is algorithmic because it was written by an autistic man for autistic students. Over 90% of my students are on the autism spectrum or are software engineers, or both. I was a neurodivergent software engineer myself. We break things down like that because that's how our students learn. Therapists specifically send their autistic clients to me to learn social skills because…
/r/seduction31/05/26 08:29 AM
1

Dont ever be ashamed of genuine, good-faith questions, man. We all come from somewhere. I've been with my SO (the girl in my profile who also coaches in the business with me) for 8 years now. We met and lived in LA and she's an actress so all of her guy friends are STUPID attractive. Tall chris hemsworth looking motherfuckers. One of them is literally a FOOT taller than me and ridiculously good looking. Very cool guys, though. But if the incels are right, how did I not lose her to them? Because …
/r/seduction31/05/26 08:15 AM
1

Yes, agree on both -- you are underestimating game and you are also following fake gurus. If you're tall, ripped, rich, and good looking, you don't NEED game. It's like being 6'4"/250lbs and fighting a 7 year old girl who weighs 40 lbs. No fighting ability necessary. At the risk of sounding a bit self-serving, when I was a student, i tried to follow coaches who had similar disadvantages to me and still succeeded. Because I just didn't feel like a 6'2" jacked black guy could really understand wha…
/r/seduction31/05/26 07:52 AM
1

I agree that the numbers game still isn't EASY. It still requires a shit ton of approaches in order to generate that kind of quantity. But I would argue that endurance and consistency (in terms of consistently approaching) while being noble qualities, are not skills.
/r/seduction31/05/26 07:47 AM
1

"Playing the numbers game," by definition, is maximizing quantity for the sole purpose of getting a better outcome due to having a larger sample size. Approaching a lot for the purpose of skill development still encompasses a lot of approaching, but for completely different reasons. It's like murder vs killing an enemy combatant in war. Both are killing, but they are for very different reasons. -- You're massively overestimating the impact of height. Height matters, yes, but it's not a panacea. …
/r/seduction31/05/26 07:41 AM
2

You're right in that for guys like us, indeed 90% of women are "out of our league" as it pertains to supply/demand and how society sees us. On the 1-10 scale, i'm a 3 if we figure that i'm at BEST a 5 in looks (and that's generous), and then we have to account for height (-1) and ethnicity (-1) and that gives us a 3/10. Again, generously. Which is about right, because the only women who ever matched with me online before I learned to optimize my profile were 3s and below. But that does NOT mean …
/r/seduction31/05/26 06:35 AM
4

No, im not talking about the idea that no one bats 1.0 so youre going to have to do a lot of approaches. That's true, but the point of the approaches is not to find a girl who likes you, it's to continually improve a skill set. I'm talking about the guys who say that social skills are a myth, you cant get good with approaching or with women, and that approaching is PURELY a numbers game so the only way to get girls is to just do a shitload of approaches until you find a girl who likes you. This …
/r/seduction31/05/26 06:14 AM
1

Handshake is fine to get things started. A lot of this depends on context, though. Networking event? Do not greet with high 5, thats weird. Handshake is appropriate. Night club? High 5 is usually better.
/r/seduction31/05/26 02:01 AM
4

Feedback per request: Good overall progress, but stop tracking outcomes. Track progress towards goals (and goals should NOT be outcome focused). Focusing on outcomes is one of the most common beginner mistakes and its super harmful to your development. Know what youre working on BEFORE you go out. Don't just wing shit randomly. If youre suddenly running out of things to say, you need to work on conversational ability. Focus on leading the conversation, ESPECIALLY when she's not super into you an…
/r/seduction30/05/26 11:41 PM
3

Very good job overall, man. Fucking RESPECT for doing this at 18. Here are my observations: Stop thinking of what to say. It's preventing you from being present and ACTUALLY listening to her. Listening is what will keep you in the conversation. Mentally checking out in order to queue things up will cause you to freeze up almost every time. Don't ask for contact information. Esp not with "let me get your number". That feels icky, like youre a player. Invite her to do something, preferably right t…
/r/seduction30/05/26 10:29 PM
2

Yeah thats often the case, though sometimes you can engineer a pseudo-situational open. Like something Sinn taught me years ago is if youre in a coffee shop and there's a woman you want to talk to who is sitting kind of far away, you can walk up with your bag, ask if she would mind watching it while you go to the bathroom, and then pretend to go to the bathroom. When you come back out, you have to walk up to her to get your bag again and then you can "randomly" notice something that you can comm…
/r/seduction30/05/26 09:43 PM
2

Solid and well said. Statistics is great for population level but useless at the individual level.
/r/seduction30/05/26 09:08 PM
1

Ok maybe "easily" was an exaggeration, but i meant easily relative to suddenly becoming taller. Career and money actually do very little for your ability to attract women, unless they are single points of failure in an otherwise solid situation. Social skills/game are a MUCH bigger lever to pull here.
/r/seduction30/05/26 09:07 PM
4

Stopping a moving set in the day time is almost always a direct open. Nothing else really makes sense, and if you try to force something situational, it's EXTREMELY transparent and you just look like a guy who is too embarrassed to tell her you just wanted to meet her. Get used to going direct in those scenarios. It's not technically as effective as indirect at the highest levels of skill, but 90% of the time a good approach that makes sense is going to beat a great approach that is weird or obv…
/r/seduction30/05/26 06:58 AM
2

RE: topic selection, you dont need to dumb it down necessarily, just dont talk about topics that would bore the F out of women. Imagine you were with a group of people and some of the women started talking about periods and tampons and women's hair products. Bored out of your mind, right? This isnt specifically a women thing, either, because if i talk to my friends who are dating coaches about shooting guns, theyre going to be bored. But if I talk to my Marine friends about software engineering,…
/r/seduction30/05/26 06:54 AM
2

The short answer is that you need to leverage every single other advantage you can AND you generally have to either be very high status (e.g., be the DJ in a nightclub, be bruno mars, be mighty mouse the MMA fighter) or very high skill level (e.g., 10-ish years of experience with a 5-figure+ approach count). You can also do it with very high natural talent, but i'm leaving that option out because if you're asking this question, you don't have it.
/r/seduction30/05/26 05:19 AM
2

im picturing this whole body condom and i hope it's a joke because its hilarious
/r/seduction30/05/26 05:16 AM
4

No disrespect, but I have never once seen a pretty girl from Guatemala and i was born and raised in socal/LA.
/r/seduction30/05/26 05:15 AM
2

Agreed, but ease of confidence isnt necessarily the same as effectiveness. But the idea that everything else being equal, taller is generally more effective, is largely correct. The big missing piece is that you can easily make everything else NOT be equal, and then you have a massive advantage over a taller guy.
/r/seduction30/05/26 05:14 AM
0

Yes its technically possible. I'm 5'4" and I've done it. But it took me >10 years and 15,000 approaches to get to the skill level where it was possible, so it's definitely possible, but it's also VERY rare because it requires massive sacrifices to get there, and almost no one is willing to make those sacrifices.
/r/seduction30/05/26 05:11 AM
1

Misogyny isnt just hatred of women. It also encompasses aversion to or prejudice of. Just like racism isnt just "i hate asians" it also encompasses "i have an aversion to asians" or "i dont want to work with asians" or "i think asians are annoying." Just because some feminists are misandrists (and they absolutely exist) doesnt mean its justified (or healthy) for us to in turn become misogynists (even slightly so) because "well they did it so why can't we?" This entire subculture should be about …
/r/seduction30/05/26 04:59 AM
1

I take it you don't understand English. He didn't say "this is statistically very rare." He said "I've still never seen it before [because its not possible]" Difficult and impossible are vastly different things.
/r/seduction28/05/26 11:26 PM
1

Yup. You can tell who has game and who doesn't based on their answer to this question. It's like a game-rorschach test.
/r/seduction28/05/26 07:06 PM
-4

This is ideological misogyny cosplaying as truth. It appeals to men (hence the upvotes) because it demonizes women (which by default makes men the heroes or virtuous victims) and because it SOUNDS right on the surface. Here's an example: "women initiate divorce than men" (fact) "Therefore, women are the gender who want to destroy relationships while men are the ones who want to fix them." (fallacy) In critical thinking, logical fallacies are "tricks of the mind" where something sounds reasonable…
/r/seduction28/05/26 07:04 PM
2

Omfg stop spamming your stupid app
/r/seduction28/05/26 03:01 AM
1

Exactly where you would expect. Bars, nightclubs, malls, book stores, crowded areas, farmers markets, grocery stores, etc. Guides are dependent on your starting point. If you're brand new try to find demonic confidence. It's a really really good progressive desensitization protocol.
/r/seduction28/05/26 03:00 AM
23

Be upfront with them that youre seeing other people. Don't be crass about it, but be honest. You will lose certain women, yes, its called the "integrity tax." But you will be able to look yourself in the mirror in the morning and you wont screw up your long term belief systems in the process.
/r/seduction28/05/26 01:06 AM
4

he wants to know how to be one of the comedians who show up to roast a celebrity. :D
/r/seduction28/05/26 01:05 AM
2

Do 20-50 apporaches/interactions a week. That's the optimal amount to make good progress on skill set. Less than that and your progress is too slow. More than that and youre overtraining and getting diminishing returns.
/r/seduction27/05/26 08:37 PM
8

Yeah, the system is "do 15,000 approaches until you get good"
/r/seduction27/05/26 09:32 AM
1

Send a unique or funny message the same day whenever possible. The current meta has women sick and tired of guys who are low effort and poor communicators. Every day you wait doubles your chances of never hearing from her again.
/r/seduction27/05/26 09:27 AM
7

They're actually almost exactly the same, there's just more misinformation about cold approach and social skills because its more niche than bodybuilding and hasnt been around nearly as long. But the skill development path maps almost exactly. Ditto for standup comedy. Almost identical path. If you start from nothing and put 4-5 years into bodybuilding, doing everything more or less ideally, you will almost guarantee to get big. Maybe not IFBB pro big, but you'll be bigger/stronger than almost e…
/r/seduction27/05/26 07:14 AM
9

Its a cheat code the way "lifting heavy and eating protein" is a cheat code to putting on muscle. It works, but its more grind than cheat.
/r/seduction27/05/26 01:18 AM
1

What made the dating coaching industry explode was the internet (and neil's book), not a lack of mentorship. Mentorship wasnt a thing by at least the 1980s. Yet pickup didnt get big until the mid 2000s. Theres no reason there would be a 25 year gap if the main root cause was lack of mentorship.
/r/seduction26/05/26 06:49 AM
1

Wasnt that common when i grew up (80s and 90s), but i cant speak for earlier generations.
/r/seduction26/05/26 04:55 AM
1

Half of men 18-25 have never asked a woman on a date 51% of men under 30 are single 64% of men have either not dated or only dated a few times in the last year I don't think most guys today have "just naturally figured it out." There's a male loneliness epidemic going on right now and it's not because men are killing it in the dating game. Guys in the past fared a bit better because they HAD to ask women out because there were no apps. And they had better social skills because there was no inter…
/r/seduction25/05/26 04:05 PM
6

It's not flirting, it's social skills, specifically dating skills. If you can't start conversations with women, don't worry about flirting yet. And no, libido doesn't magically give you skills any more than "seeing red" magically makes you a good fighter. It does not.
/r/seduction25/05/26 01:46 AM
1

It doesnt go away longer term for 99% of men. Just becomes more manageable.
/r/seduction24/05/26 07:31 PM
1

It's not fear of rejection. It's an abnormally high sensitivity to it and its a well studied phenomenon. Technically its called "rejection sensitivity." The dysphoria part is tiktok-speak, its not actually the clinical description. It's sort of like how there's a difference between "feeling anxious" and "social anxiety disorder". The amount is largely what determines the diagnosis. Very common comorbidity with autism.
/r/seduction24/05/26 07:28 PM
1

My point is that at that size you have a VERY big advantage over an untrained 130lbs 18 year old.
/r/seduction24/05/26 09:06 AM
1

We dont know for sure, but the classic symptoms are there, and they're even more pronounced in person. If you're autistic yourself, think about the clues even from the book The Game. And if its been a while since you've read it, read it again thru this lens. You'll see the clues EVERYWHERE. The entire method: The "mystery method" is highly systematized with social interaction, constructing rules, routines, and scripts to navigate situations that did not come naturally to him. The outfits: He use…
/r/seduction23/05/26 10:07 PM
3

I never cold approached with him because I didnt meet him until I was a coach (circa 2007ish) and he was already done with cold approaching by then. Ironically, he's seen ME cold approach but that's a whole other story. But I have socialized with him, been to his house, introduced him to my female friends, etc so I have interacted with him a bit. One thing to keep in mind that we often dont realize (and that i didnt realize until I was around him) is that Neil isn't an everyday regular guy. He's…
/r/seduction23/05/26 01:25 AM
6

"Don't recommend you use it UNLESS the woman seems very into astrology, is gullible and loves such cold-reading BS." So basically, 90% of LA women lol
/r/seduction23/05/26 12:36 AM
2

The problem isnt what he said in the book. The problem is his track record in his real life. I'm not saying it's not possible to learn anything from his book, but I am hesitant to read it for the same reason I'm hesitant to read a book on wealth from a guy who is repeatedly homeless.
/r/seduction23/05/26 12:27 AM
1

i wouldnt necessarily recommend the mystery method and the truth. I don't dislike the mystery method or Mystery. On the contrary, I learned a TON from Mystery back in the day as a student and as a coach. In fact I'm in the acknowledgments of the book, so I'm probably pretty biased here. But the book is essentially written by an autistic man for autistic men. So if you're in that demographic (like I was), it was FANTASTIC for its time. But if you're not, it can make you a bit robotic and strange.…
/r/seduction22/05/26 11:59 PM
2

Fyi: Amateurs look for IOIs. Professionals test for investment.
/r/seduction22/05/26 08:00 PM
8

Lmao we joke, but I've had students pull same night who were so LSE that they rationalized that the girl only gave him a bj because she was "probably trying to get back at an ex she was mad at." I just stared at him flabbergasted.
/r/seduction22/05/26 07:59 PM
2

This is a legitimate technique but it's so advanced that it bombs horribly whenever someone tries to use it who doesn't have that level of skill. Its like using a flamethrower as a weapon. You better be damn good at it or you're just going to set yourself on fire. The other problem I have with it is that it borders HEAVILY on unethical / dark triad. It's not always inherently unethical but it's often one step away so it's not something I teach to guys. Its sort of like treating your wife like sh…
/r/seduction22/05/26 07:34 PM
1

This is spot on. Its called the availability heuristic and it's a well studied phenomenon where we overestimate a risk because it comes to mind easily (often because we've been reading about it too much)
/r/ExRedPill22/05/26 07:09 PM
1

Its mostly skill deficiency that's the root cause here
/r/seduction22/05/26 12:46 AM
3

If theyre hooking up with women less attractive than them, theyre just riding off of women thinking theyre hot + oftentimes lots of interactions or approaches. If theyre hooking up with women MORE attractive than them, they're usually using compensatory factors like status, money, drugs, or game. Being physically attractive doesn't automatically make you successful with women who are more attractive than you because if you're an 8/10, you're still relatively unattractive to a 10/10. A lot of peo…
/r/seduction21/05/26 10:41 PM
1

This doesn't happen as often as you'd think. It happens when weight is your single point of failure but you have almost all of the other variables optimized or decent. Note: This is rarely the case. But if it is, fixing your weight will give you dramatic gains. But if you're overweight but also shy, timid, awkward, antisocial, losing the weight won't change anything because all of the other variables will still hold you back.
/r/seduction21/05/26 09:01 PM
1

what happens when you day game in germany and other countries?
/r/seduction21/05/26 04:16 PM
1

No. Most SKILLED men had some type of help or mentoring along the way. But the average man is struggling today. And the LACK of help is a big contributor to that.
/r/seduction21/05/26 02:28 PM
3

Thanks dude, much appreciated.
/r/seduction21/05/26 06:09 AM
6

It's a great question and I appreciate your open-mindedness. The issue isn't primarily that youre unimpressed by looks alone, it's the underlying vibe of "prove yourself to me" or "you have to earn compliments." Imagine if a woman said that to you. Like you walk up and she gives off this air of "who are you? You have to earn my attention and affection" Or imagine youre dating a woman who says you have to earn her love. Offputting, right? Doesnt matter if it's true or not, its super off-putting. …
/r/seduction21/05/26 05:21 AM
2

Haha ok well by process of elimination I'd say theres only the smooth part left then
/r/seduction21/05/26 03:53 AM
8

are you opposed to blackface?
/r/seduction21/05/26 03:45 AM
9

I would argue that men who take on a kind of defensive, bitter, "women have to earn my affection because I'm an alpha god" attitude repels more women than it attracts. I've been there, done that, and its as bad as neediness.
/r/seduction20/05/26 11:12 PM
9

Agree with meeting people with where they're at, but the lack of nuance in your post means that massive numbers of guys will misunderstand the messaging and feel like they can NEVER compliment a woman ever, and that will cause its own set of problems when they dogmatically run around refusing to ever show any interest.
/r/seduction20/05/26 10:36 PM
7

This worked in 2005 but is gamey and cringey by today's standards. They still CAN work but theyre much less effective today
/r/seduction20/05/26 10:03 PM
49

Compliments aren't the problem. Compliments THAT COME FROM A PLACE OF NEEDINESS are the problem. Does Chris Hemsworth blow out of a set if he gives her a compliment? No. Do smooth black guys blow out when they approach with a compliment? No. It's like back in the day when guys would swear that anyone who buys a drink for a girl or pays for dinner is a supplicating loser. We eventually learned that thats not true. The real problem was BUYING HER A DRINK FROM A PLACE OF NEEDINESS.
/r/seduction20/05/26 10:00 PM
3

I take a nuanced view of this issue. Looks absolutely matter (in the sense that they influence things) but they don't matter nearly as MUCH as people think they do. Trying to date out of your league (especially significantly so) usually requires some sort of compensatory mechanism, which is why in situations like mine where the woman is much more attractive than the guy, the guy usually has high levels of confidence or charisma or social skills or status/fame money, power, etc Game is really jus…
/r/seduction20/05/26 06:45 PM
1

Nope. My coaching is invite only and frankly, there no way I'd invite him.
/r/seduction20/05/26 05:23 PM
0

I will not discount your "evidence" because im acting in bad faith, i take logical and intellectual debate very seriously. Arguably overly so. Go back through my post history and you'll see that I almost never argue from a position of bad faith or commit logical fallacies in order to prove a point. No, I will most likely discount your "evidence" because you have proven to use mostly fallacious arguments that are invalid, illogical, and demonstrably incorrect. If you could actually provide me wit…
/r/seduction20/05/26 06:58 AM
2

because incels got banned and now we have to deal with this bs here
/r/seduction20/05/26 06:27 AM
7

What do I think about that sub? I think its 2% guys who have been screwed over unfairly by a small subset of shitty people, and 98% of guys who are bitter, angry at women, jaded at the world for their lack of success in dating, and are looking for evidence to justify that worldview. I would stay the F away from any group or organization or ideology that promotes bitterness towards women unless you want to turn into that. It's not that different from redpill, if you think about it. Which is why w…
/r/ExRedPill20/05/26 06:26 AM
1

So let me get this straight. Your logic is: "ive talked to 50 women in my life and they didnt want to date me even though they didnt tell me why, but i am so smart that I can tell you with 100% certainty that these 50 reponses means that 4 billion women on the planet will ALL reject me as well. "And my omniscience also is good enough to discern that the REASON all 4 billion would refuse is because of some universal ugliness that I possess that I cant quantify, can't prove, can't demonstrate, and…
/r/seduction20/05/26 06:18 AM
7

I've coached guys on how to interact with women in an effective, respectful, and ethical way for 20 years now. I've coached thousands of guys over the years, many of whom went on to get married, have kids, and start families. Out of all of those men, I've had exactly ZERO of them ever get caught up in one of those sites where their reputation got ruined. Its never been an issue. In fact, I don't even personally KNOW a single person who got caught in something like that unless they actually were …
/r/ExRedPill20/05/26 02:54 AM
6

The risk of this type of thing happening to me feels like the risk of a plane falling out of the sky and landing on me. Sure it happens sometimes to innocent people, but it's such a low probability that I don't really worry about walking outside for fear of a plane landing on me.
/r/ExRedPill20/05/26 02:41 AM
1

i dont have a course but good try!
/r/seduction20/05/26 01:33 AM
1

Saying that you know precisely what the root causes is for a symptom because you've experienced the symptom a lot is ABSOLUTELY an uneducated opinion. It's the same as me telling my doctor that I KNOW my cough is from throat cancer because I've been coughing for a long time now so that tells me it HAS to be cancer. Your inability to fix a problem does not mean its impossible because you cannot differentiate between impossible and difficult.
/r/seduction20/05/26 01:32 AM
4

Over half of my coaching clientele are autistic. Most level 1 but some level 2. And if you know what level 2 is, you know how debilitating that is. That's not "im awkward," that's "i cant live on my own because im a danger to myself and others around me." And those guys have all lost their virginity. We're talking 35 year old virgins who are 5'2", Asian, who live with their parents, couldnt make eye contact, monotone, and came to me not understanding that showering once every 2 weeks was a probl…
/r/seduction20/05/26 12:55 AM
1

I'm not undermining your experience (or lackthereof). I'm undermining your uneducated opinion by POINTING OUT your lack of experience. Theres nothing wrong with lacking experience. Everyone starts from somewhere. I started out a lonely virgin so no judgment from me at all. But there IS something wrong with claiming to know how women and dating work when you havent had enough success with them.
/r/seduction20/05/26 12:40 AM
2

lol i was joking. During the heyday of pickup (2006-2014 or so) i rocked this look and it became a weird sort of brand for me as a coach during that era.
/r/seduction20/05/26 12:31 AM
0

He's very clearly outing himself as someone who hasnt spent much time around women
/r/seduction19/05/26 11:28 PM
2

I've never heard of this "peacocking" thing, is that like when a guy wears a giant mohawk or something? :D
/r/seduction19/05/26 11:27 PM
1

yeah i get accused of it a decent amount too whenever i write a longer piece, because I write and think very analytically, so i'm fairly sensitive to seeing other people passing off AI slop as their own content. But I also try to be fair and give benefit of the doubt when assessing writing that looks like it MIGHT be AI because I dislike false accusations when theyre levied at me too. I agree that there's a ton of formatting here and that can resemble AI, though I think i'd need to see more evid…
/r/seduction19/05/26 11:25 PM
1

Very interesting, never considered the tired variable. I think it's also identity based. If you form your entire identity around an ideology, then anything threatening said ideology runs the risk of destroying your entire identity, and that is so existentially threatning that people will die to defend it (e.g., people going on murder spree because a newspaper insulted their religion)
/r/seduction19/05/26 11:18 PM
1

If youve done a lot of cold approaches, you'd know that you can successfully open and "get your foot in the door" either by being very good looking, being her type, being very high status, or being charismatic. Often game/charisma overrides looks in those environments because good looking + socially awkward almost always blows out, but mediocre or bad looking + charismatic has at least a 50/50 shot at hooking.
/r/seduction19/05/26 11:15 PM
0

I mean, before AI was around, every copywriter in the world was using that same clickbait type format, and capitalizing every word in a title, and every youtube title was also using the same format. And that's before AI existed. So it doesnt exactly prove that he used AI with it. It's like saying AI likes to use paragraphs and I ALSO use paragraphs, so therefore I must be using AI to write my posts. The formatting COULD be AI assisted, but it doesnt scream AI to me. AI tends to overuse emojis, o…
/r/seduction19/05/26 11:12 PM
-1

If you actually look at the studies and meta analyses, most of them (outside of online dating obviously) indicate that women value looks less than men do. "Large cross‑cultural surveys and lab studies find that men rate a partner’s physical attractiveness as more important than women do, while women rate a partner’s status/resources as more important than men do" Specifically, from Arizona State University's Study Results (https://news.asu.edu/content/do-men-and-women-really-look-different-thing…
/r/seduction19/05/26 11:03 PM
1

Agreed. The amount of blackpill garbage being posted here nowadays is depressing. And it's not JUST that it's wrong, its that the ideology for most of them is so strong that they will go to extreme lengths to dismiss or run away from data that contradicts their worldview in order to keep their ideology from crumbling. I suppose I shouldnt be that surprised. This ideological thinking is happening in politics, in religion, in sports, and in almost every other field so why wouldnt it happen here.
/r/seduction19/05/26 10:49 PM
7

I'm not bald but I am 5'4" and not very good looking. I would put overall appearance at around a 3/10 when factoring in height and ethnicity, relative to America. Look at my PFP. She wasnt into me for my looks, i PROMISE YOU. She has said multiple times on record here that she was not attracted to me in the slightest when we first met. Her attraction to me grew as we interacted. Now I will admit that this type of relationship is UNCOMMON because most guys dont have the skill set to overcome a ve…
/r/seduction19/05/26 10:42 PM
1

lol ive been saying the same thing reading this thread. Half of the people here are responding to an argument that doesn't exist. FFS no one is saying looks dont matter at all. Theyre saying looks dont matter AS MUCH AS YOU THINK THEY DO
/r/seduction19/05/26 10:37 PM
6

lol this is so spot on its not even funny. So many men (and women) try to say they know what works with dating when they're not successful themselves. It's strange how common this is, but each group doesnt see their own blind spots. Good looking naturals who found success early and easily often believe they know what it's like to be a guy who struggles with women (esp when they give advice to guys who are struggling). But they don't believe that an incel knows what it's like to be a player. But …
/r/seduction19/05/26 10:34 PM
2

Causality is when something CAUSES something else. So for example, you stand in the rain --> that causes you to get wet. This is different from CORRELATION which is when two things happen at the same time but one doesnt cause the other. For example, I wore red socks today and I ALSO cold approached a girl and took her home. The red socks did not CAUSE her to go home with me, that was just correlation. The reason this is so important is because people tend to mix up causation vs correlation ALL T…
/r/seduction19/05/26 10:16 PM
1

Fantastic post. Probably applies to 90% of guys reading this.
/r/seduction19/05/26 08:46 PM
0

This doesn't sound like AI at all. What are you seeing that sounds like AI?
/r/seduction19/05/26 08:45 PM
1

Your causality is wrong on the first part. And also weirdly specific to white women, implying your logic ONLY applies to young white american women but older women or non-white women are immune to it. The causality problem: He paid for coaching BECAUSE HE WAS BAD AT GAME, not that coaching MADE him back at game. Paying 12k for coaching doesn't make you bad if you're already good. If your coaches suck, the coaching might not help you, but it doesnt make you significantly worse. If you send Jordan…
/r/seduction19/05/26 10:26 AM
5

So no adidas tracksuit and gold chains?
/r/seduction19/05/26 10:17 AM
2

Used to be, yeah. Was born and raised there and did all of my training in la/oc/sd
/r/seduction19/05/26 01:09 AM
1

It is a lot. And you're right, most people don't have the energy or grit for it. Excellence is a lonely endeavor.
/r/seduction18/05/26 10:33 PM
1

Go to the city. You'll see tons.
/r/seduction18/05/26 09:35 PM
1

How long did it take me to do 10k? Probably about 7-8 years or so. I've done roughly 15k over a 22 year training/coaching period but I've also been in a committed relationship with my SO for a while so my approaches were mostly front-loaded over those years
/r/seduction18/05/26 09:27 PM
3

Read the guide to flirting that was posted here a few hours ago. Great primer on the basics. But you're still going to need a few thousand reps before you can do it effectively
/r/seduction18/05/26 08:56 PM
13

10,000 approaches
/r/seduction18/05/26 08:55 PM
2

It's a very good question. "Fake it til you make it" is a legitimate strategy to improvement, but it has to be done CORRECTLY. "Faking it" by changing your external behaviors to show yourself that you are worthy of some goal is effective. "Faking it" to get back at someone who rejected you or to prove yourself to someone is NOT effective.
/r/seduction18/05/26 08:13 PM
5

Dont try for 10s if you can't get 8s. It's like asking how do i beat a UFC fighter but ive never fought competitively before. The only way youre going to make that happen is by cheating. With dating, that means paying for it or having cocaine. With fighting it means bringing a gun to the fight. Do not recommend.
/r/seduction18/05/26 08:02 PM
1

I agree, it's logically fallacious, but it doesn't change the fact that many people have that knee jerk reaction today, so its probably in his best interest to avoid it. It's like if his grammar and spelling sucked. Doesn't change the veracity of his arguments, but does affect the effectiveness of his writing if people don't want to read it.
/r/seduction18/05/26 06:00 PM
1

Great post, man. Skimmed it briefly but everything I saw was pretty legit. Good breakdown. FYI in the future I would ask AI to help you with organization but NOT to rewrite your content, as people are so turned off by AI slop nowadays that they immediately discount anything that sounds like AI wrote it, whether it was written 100% by AI or just re-written by AI for clarity. Btw had one minor nitpick with your post, though it might be a cultural difference due to you being in India: In America, "…
/r/seduction18/05/26 12:31 PM
2

This is the right answer
/r/seduction18/05/26 12:16 PM
1

This is a quick way to get your membership revoked from the gym
/r/seduction18/05/26 12:14 PM
2

I feel like a lot of you guys are focusing more on APPEARING indifferent than ACTUALLY not letting it bother you, and I would argue that the 2nd is more important than the first, because the former is just performative.
/r/seduction18/05/26 12:12 PM
1

Go out focused on a specific skill you want to improve at. Maybe that's getting over AA. Maybe it's approaching groups. Maybe it's not running out of things to say. Maybe it's humor. Maybe it's flirting. Maybe it's Escalation. Pick what you need to work on (usually the most basic sticking point is the most important) and focus on THAT and not on "how can i get something from her." That means at the beginning you won't get numbers usually unless she offers or unless things go really well and ther…
/r/seduction18/05/26 09:25 AM
3

Good report, man, and good job getting out there again. Main issue i see is that youre trying to get something from women (a phone number, a date, etc) instead of trying to get good at this (acquiring the skill). You want SKILL, not just A GIRL. If you just want a girl, then just pay for it, because it's the easiest way to get it if thats all you want. But you probably ARENT okay with it, because what you really want is NOT the girl, but the ABILITY TO GET THE GIRL. That's what i mean when i say…
/r/seduction18/05/26 07:37 AM
3

Trust in the process that when you put time into a skill, you get better at it. I didnt have faith in my own personal abilities. I had faith that social skills are actual skills and that skill progression is an incredibly consistent process. You work at a skill and eventually get good at it. I focused on my successes (even tiny ones), not the blow outs, rejections, or feelings. Focusing on failure is WHY it feels hopeless. This is why video games almost always feel fun vs hopeless, even when the…
/r/seduction17/05/26 01:34 PM
1

She has literally gone on record on reddit to say that she did not find me attractive at all and is not into Asians and definitely not into short Asians. I'm obviously the first Asian she's ever dated. But sure, you probably think she's lying too. Believe what you will.
/r/seduction17/05/26 12:41 PM
1

Nope, that wasn't me dude, sorry. I never had a rollercoaster routine. But even if im mistaken and I somehow forgot about having some routine I've never used, that would have been nearly 20 years ago when I was a very inexperienced jr coach and I absolutely COULDNT do it then. It took me over 10 years before I could pull it off reliably. So the point is moot. And if you dont believe that the mechanism of attraction exists and can be done, then by default you must believe that my SO just saw me a…
/r/seduction17/05/26 12:26 PM
1

Good shit man. Get it!
/r/seduction17/05/26 12:03 PM
1

You haven't seen infields of me because there aren't any online. Unless you were around in 2007 before they got pulled down when I stopped working for the company that owned them. But i highly doubt that, as I've never had any routines about rollercoasters. You must be confusing me with someone else. But that's neither here nor there. You're saying its fantasy because you've never seen it. If we're going by that logic, any coach who has had sex with a girl is a fantasy too because I've never act…
/r/seduction17/05/26 12:02 PM
2

The correct here depends on what youre optimizing for. Are you optimizing for efficiency in pulling tonight? Maximal effectiveness in this particular set? Long term growth and skill set acquisition? Each of those gives a different answer. Efficiency for same night (which i dont recommend unless youre advanced): Ignore them. Prioritize sets who are looking at you, checking you out, or giving you approach invitations. Maximal effectiveness in this set: Wait in line behind the people standing next …
/r/seduction17/05/26 11:26 AM
2

Your comment suggests that you're fairly well adjusted socially. That's great and I'm genuinely happy for you. But you're not realizing that the average guy here is NOT well adjusted and does NOT have "base social skills we all have." The average redditor is below avg socially and the avg guy in seddit is also below avg socially. Put those together and you get a group of guys who are here BECAUSE theyre struggling with basic social skills. Which is exactly why the most common "seduction problem"…
/r/seduction17/05/26 11:18 AM
2

Yeah i went sober every time. Not because I'm a badass, but because I have an anaphylactic/allergic reaction to alcohol that makes my throat close up when I take a sip of alcohol. Fun times lmao
/r/seduction17/05/26 09:42 AM
3

Lol no I did literally thousands. Over 10k, likely around 15k or so. In the beginning years I went out every week 3-4x and did about 10 approaches per day or night. And I did this for 20ish years, though there were a few gaps for relationships and once I became a coach I didn't need that kind of volume anymore. So conservatively we're looking at about 10-15k approaches. Not everyone has to do those numbers, I was just a bit obsessive about it because I wanted to get really good.
/r/seduction17/05/26 09:34 AM
2

This is a skill. One you're currently not good at and not naturally talented at (and that's perfectly okay). Do you know how many reps it takes to get good results at a skill you currently suck at? Not 10. Not even 100. THOUSANDS. If you want results and skill in the long run, youre going to have to grind a skill set to get there.
/r/seduction17/05/26 08:54 AM
3

I have a slightly different perspective. I hated night clubs. But I went to them to TRAIN A SKILL SET. I didnt like it most of the time. It was a pain in the ass and scary and gave me anxiety. But showing up and doing thousands of approaches in a night club is what gave me the skill set to date the kinds of women that old me would have jizzed his pants over. So the juice was worth the squeeze, even if the squeeze was often unpleasant.
/r/seduction17/05/26 08:51 AM
1

The vast majority of guys do NOT know what a frame is, so I wouldn't be so quick to just assume they do. Most guys think a frame is "acting cool" or "believing they're alpha."
/r/seduction17/05/26 05:21 AM
3

and without blinking
/r/seduction17/05/26 04:49 AM
8

Yeah it happens, man. Been there, made the same mistake as you did. She's nervous, uncomfortable, but wants you to lead. Main thing is to learn the lesson from that experience and step up next time.
/r/seduction17/05/26 04:22 AM
11

If she wasnt into him, she wouldnt have brought him into her bedroom. Much more likely occurrence is that he didnt escalate correctly
/r/seduction17/05/26 04:01 AM
25

Most likely she wanted you to lead the escalation and make her feel comfortable. She wanted this to be "your fault," as in youre leading and making this happen. It kind of sounds like you didn't step up in that moment.
/r/seduction17/05/26 04:00 AM
1

Todd's good, been around forever. He was a coach even when I was a student and that was in the mid 2000s. But if youre only following a guy's stuff for his "material and techniques" then youre missing the components that ACTUALLY get you good. It's not the techniques or things to say. It's the structure used to improve and get good + the ability to troubleshoot your sticking points. The reason that courses rarely work to get guys really good results is because skill progression mostly comes from…
/r/seduction16/05/26 09:48 AM
1

Theres no possible way to give you a real answer without knowing what your skill level is now, how old you are, where you live, what you look like, how tall you are, etc. Youre asking an impossible question with this lack of context
/r/seduction16/05/26 05:02 AM
0

Theres nothing you could have done WITH YOUR CURRENT SKILL SET. And that's okay. That's like losing a fight to a better fighter. Theres pretty much nothing you could have done. But the goal isnt to win the fight. The goal is to learn from the loss and use it to get better so that when the rematch happens in a year or two, you're better equipped and ready to take on the challenge. Don't buy into the idea that attraction cannot be created. That's bullshit. Amateurs believe that because THEY cant d…
/r/seduction16/05/26 04:48 AM
1

A few observations: When youre a beginner, physical attraction feels like it's REALLY important because you dont have the ability to generate much attraction so the only thing doing the heavy lifting (if at all) is physical attraction. This is why at the beginner phases you generally only end up hooking up with women who really like you. But the better you get at the skill set, the more women you'll end up with who DIDNT find you physically attractive at the beginning. This is similar to fightin…
/r/seduction16/05/26 04:45 AM
1

The same reason i can't just watch videos of mike tyson and then immediately be a world champion boxer. It's a bit more complicated than that.
/r/seduction15/05/26 05:39 AM
4

Default openers: Night game: "Hey whats up, you guys look fun" Day game: "excuse me... this is totally random but you are absolutely adorable. And I had to come meet you" Obviously dont do that in day time if the situation dictates that thats inappropriate or contextually irrelevant (e.g., at a funeral, standing next to someone in line, at work, etc.)
/r/seduction14/05/26 06:49 PM
1

yeah i just randomly stumbled across this thread and saw that you had tagged me. I have tagged notifications turned on so not sure why i didnt get anything. Keep up the good work!
/r/seduction14/05/26 07:34 AM
30

Have a default opener so that you cant convince yourself that you cant go up because you dont know what to say Practice approaches BEFORE you see a girl you think is really attractive and the stakes are super high Walk up before you have a chance to think about it (generally in less than 1-2 seconds) If you're still struggling, go out with a friend and give him $200 in $20 bills. Have him point out 10 girls to approach. Every approach you do you get $20 back. Every approach you hesitate on, he k…
/r/seduction14/05/26 07:01 AM
4

Great job again, man. For some reason my account never notified me of your tag. Not sure why, but if you ever tag me in the future and i dont reply, feel free to DM me. To answer your questions: If she's walking in front of you, say "excuse me" but from a good 10 feet away so that you dont scare the crap out of her when she turns around. When she does, smile and stop as you run your compliment opener. She will usually subconsciously stop when you do. If she doesn't, and keeps walking, that's oka…
/r/seduction14/05/26 05:23 AM
2

He's been spamming his app on multiple different alt accounts for months now. Do a Google search filtering for site:reddit.com and "shawty app" and youll see all of the different accounts hes using to spam.
/r/seduction14/05/26 05:05 AM
1

Ignore him. He's been running around reddit for months now spamming his stupid app and pretending to want to help people.
/r/seduction14/05/26 05:02 AM
2

Yeah it's sad that this has become incel and black pill adjacent. The community was supposed to be about guys with agency who were bettering themselves and their dating skills, not a place to cry about how hopeless things are and how evil women are.
/r/seduction14/05/26 12:21 AM
3

unfortunately because it gets clicks and engagement, hence why we're all discussing it like sheep lol
/r/seduction13/05/26 11:51 PM
3

We first have to define manipulation in order to solve this equation. Modern Psychology Definition: An action designed to influence or control another person, often using abusive, deceptive, or underhanded tactics to advance the interests of the manipulator, often at another’s expense. So now that we have a definition, we have to figure out what the most likely reasons are for why women would make a guy wait. Are the most likely reasons in order for her to gain some advantage at the man's expens…
/r/seduction13/05/26 11:49 PM
1

You're right that he's incorrect about this assessment, but nothing wrong with struggling and needing help. When i was a student I worked with coaches, therapists, instructors, etc because i needed the help badly.
/r/seduction13/05/26 11:29 PM
0

I dont know why youre getting downvoted, this is legitimately good advice lol
/r/seduction13/05/26 10:58 PM
2

Yup. To be fair, it was playing yourself in 2006 too. But it's worse today.
/r/seduction13/05/26 10:57 PM
7

theyve forgotten about you by then, that's whats wrong with it.
/r/seduction13/05/26 10:56 PM
2

yeah the whole 'pretend to be nonchalant' thing has existed forever. The movie swingers popularized it in the 90s and is where most people heard of it. But similar to the "always be closing" line from the movie Glengarry Glen Ross, and silencers on guns making "pew" sounds, it's just TV bullshit that sounds cool but isnt how things work in the real world. Even in the early 2000s when I first started my training journey, the guys actually in the field doing well said to call immediately, often wh…
/r/seduction13/05/26 10:56 PM
1

Yeah that's not callbox humor, that's just referencing a shared context like "I hope you liked the drinks at the bar we were at when I met you." But the bigger issue is that you're likely getting phone numbers without solid interactions. The phone number is NOT the goal, the interaction is. Don't bother collecting phone numbers for mediocre or low investment interactions. That's a rookie move.
/r/seduction13/05/26 09:56 PM
2

Nice job dude! And great job following the FR structure I posted earlier. Keep consistent at this and you'll get good. Virtually guaranteed. Feel free to tag me on future FRs if you have questions or want feedback.
/r/seduction13/05/26 08:30 AM
9

Usually callback humor to something you guys joked around about when you met. If you dont have anything, you can also use generic banter texts, though theyre generally less effective than callback. Example:"This is <your name> from the main street cat adoption agency. We have received your request to adopt 74 cats but had some questions for you if you're available." She will either laugh and ask how you are or will role play into it.
/r/seduction12/05/26 11:15 PM
2

100%. Preach, brother.
/r/seduction12/05/26 08:50 PM
15

This text is what every other guy texts. It doesnt work unless youre the most physically attractive guy in the collection of guys texting her this same message. And that's not a gamble i'm willing to take.
/r/seduction12/05/26 08:49 PM
11

Do not wait to text. Text the SAME DAY. Waiting 2 days has NEVER worked, but its even worse today because women are filtering out low-effort guys because almost every guy is low effort nowadays. If shes doing most of the talking, that's good that she's investing but bad because she's leading and youre not. Dont just ask for a number. Invite her to something and THEN get her number once you have plans. Focus on getting better, not getting women to like you. Your breakdown highlighted what happene…
/r/seduction12/05/26 08:47 PM
1

Not necessarily. They are the sets that are the most important for your growth. Sometimes those are the sets that scare you the most or the sets that blow you out right away or even the sets that you have difficulty approaching. And sometimes theyre the sets that are successful and that you take home. It's whichever sets are the most important to highlight and break down for your own improvement.
/r/seduction12/05/26 07:12 PM
9

FYI the structure of a good field report is: How I felt about the session What my goals were before going out What i did right What I could have done better What specifically happening in my most important sets What I want to focus on next session
/r/seduction12/05/26 01:15 AM
1

Don't do ballsy "go big or go home" shit in day time. That's how you get arrested. Walking up and cold approaching direct is ballsy enough for people today.
/r/seduction12/05/26 01:11 AM
13

HIGHLY HIGHLY depends on where you are, man. Things that are ballsy in a club will get you arrested at the mall
/r/seduction11/05/26 10:47 PM
2

Youre going to need some exposure therapy (and potentially medication if it gets really bad) to overcome this, man. Reddit is not the place for it. Get a good therapist who is well versed in exposure therapy and ask him to walk you through this.
/r/seduction11/05/26 10:45 PM
5

Looks help, but for cold approaching or IRL dating, give me an ugly guy with game over a good looking guy with social awkardness and no game every day of the week. I've coached hundreds of guys over the years and pound for pound, game is much more effective than looks for IRL dating in most contexts. That said, obviously you want both, but the real unwritten bonus to the looks part is that improving looks is generally EASIER and FASTER than improving social skills because most guys can do a whol…
/r/seduction11/05/26 10:56 AM
8

20-50 approaches per week Approach as SOON as you see them Go in without expectation Success isnt they like you. Success is you walked up to them and opened Remind yourself that you cannot predict what's going to happen in the interaction before you walk up so there's no point in pretending that you can If you cant approach at all, bring a friend or a wing and give them $200 in $20 bills. Tell them they give you $20 back each approach you do, but every time you take more than 5 or 10 seconds to …
/r/seduction11/05/26 02:54 AM
7

There's a search function, man. Use it. This question gets asked every week. Don't ask people to do your research for you.
/r/seduction11/05/26 12:00 AM
1

The transition normally isnt that difficult and the two ideas arent mutually exclusive. What's going on internally that is preventing you from doing both? Remember that flirting is 80-90% teasing and humor, which is very compatible with the fun guy, so the transition should be seamless. Unless youre thinking of flirting like james bond style, where you stay silent and just look at her from across the room hoping you can seduce her with your eyes. THEN i can see the disconnect.
/r/seduction10/05/26 11:30 PM
1

Agreed, I've only met one or two actual naturals in my entire career, guys who just have a weird, supernatural knack for social skills and pick it up with almost no difficulty. Almost everyone else were category 2 guys -- guys who just had a shitload more experience than everyone else.
/r/seduction10/05/26 09:40 AM
3

Youre not approaching to get dates. Youre approaching to get BETTER. To build a skill set. So yes, you need to approach women who might not be receptive or women you might not be that into.
/r/seduction10/05/26 09:38 AM
4

Yeah for group #1, i didnt mean mentors as in professional coaches. I meant mentors = friends, older brothers, dad, uncle, etc. Basically people around you that are a positive social influence. The only guys who get professional coaches are group #3 and that's because we're all socially retarded and dont have enough cool friends. And because I needed a lot more help than a few cool friends could provide.
/r/seduction10/05/26 06:51 AM
15

tl;dr: Most guys aren't good, and the ones who genuinely are either had genetic/natural advantages or coaches/mentors or both. Very very few men in the world are actually skilled. Probably less than 1% of the population. Think about everyone you know. How many of those guys can reliably cold approach and date women more attractive than them? Very very few, right? That's what raw skill looks like. Dating someone who already likes you isn't a high level of skill. It's just being able to talk to a …
/r/seduction10/05/26 06:24 AM
1

This looks like a quick way to get a lot of weird looks like "wtf you tried to trick me into giving you my number" or a lot of flakey numbers. The purpose of the approach is not to get a number from a girl who wants to have nothing to do with you. Its to engage in a real conversation and make a genuine connection. Without that, the number is pointless.
/r/seduction09/05/26 11:26 PM
1

He retired from coaching years ago. Haven't seen him in over a decade.
/r/seduction09/05/26 11:14 PM
1

Yeah my SO would have swiped left. She didn't find me attractive when we first met.
/r/seduction09/05/26 10:54 PM
9

Your assessment that youre missing sexual tension is correct. You are likely missing: * Disagreeableness * Teasing * Flirting * Physical touch If youre missing all of the above (which is common), you get your exact symptom. Super common.
/r/seduction09/05/26 12:53 PM
40

Yes cold approaching is super uncommon. Always has been but its much much more uncommon today because today's 25 year old has significantly worse social skills than a 25 year old in 2010. Girls weren't complaining that guys dont approach anymore in 2005 or 2010. They are today. The good news is that theres a LOT less competition now so ability to cold approach is almost a superpower now.
/r/seduction08/05/26 09:29 PM
28

Everyone believes their own country is the hardest. But the hardest countries are probably ones where you dont speak the language, they dont speak english, and the culture is super repressive or where they hate your ethnicity. I would imagine afghanistan is particularly difficult.
/r/seduction08/05/26 09:01 PM
3

SAME hahahaha
/r/seduction08/05/26 06:15 AM
1

Hahaha i totally agree with your premise about leading, but i do think that a LOT of guys today would have ZERO problem with telling people at their wedding that the girl made the first move.
/r/seduction08/05/26 06:06 AM
2

Make sure you pick wisely. A bad coach is worse than no coach. Here's what I would generally recommend: Get a referral from someone else you know if possible. Preferably someone you trust or who has similar sticking points to you. Talk to the prospective coach and ask him what experience he has, whether he's solved similar problems before, what his methodology is, if he has any past students you can talk to, and what his guarantees are. I wouldn't work with any coach who doesn't guarantee his wo…
/r/seduction08/05/26 06:04 AM
2

Look for the bars and lounges in the big casinos that people go to to pre-game or if they want to be out but arent into the super clubs. e.g., Chandelier bar in Cosmo.
/r/seduction07/05/26 02:49 AM
2

Damn, spot on answer. Legit.
/r/seduction07/05/26 02:40 AM
5

What youre seeing is old school stuff back in the day when we believed the way to attract women is to tell long, elaborate stories about how our exgf was a stripper and we defended her with a crowbar. That theory has long been debunked. Storytelling is a useful skill to have for sure, but it's a very secondary skill in terms of importance. Leading, conversation, humor, flirting, escalation are all primary skills and MUCH more important, so i wouldnt worry about stories much until you can get tho…
/r/seduction06/05/26 09:50 AM
1

Declining because of logistics is fine. Declining because youre trying to "be alpha" is lame. Dont do that. Be honest and let her know how you feel. That you've been trying to set something up but the last minute cancelations are giving you the vibe that she's not really interested and that you want to respect that if thats the case. She will either confirm that thats whats going on or will change course on her behavior.
/r/seduction05/05/26 11:50 PM
1

Introduce yourself, shake hands, she says her name. If she doesnt say her name and just says "nice to meet you," say "umm... this is the part where youre supposed to say your name." She will laugh and get embarrassed and then tell you her name. Then say "wow you look just like a <her name>" or "wow you dont look like a <her name> at all" and then give a reason why. The reason has to be true and real. Do NOT make the reason insulting, obviously (e.g., dont say "wow you dont look like an ashley at…
/r/seduction05/05/26 10:45 PM
8

20-50 approaches per week, focus on skill set, not on getting the girl. Literally treat every approach like "this is just another rep to improve skill set." That will help you to stop seeing every approach as the most important opportunity of your life because this might be your wife. Also, this one girl you screwed up with is statistically NOT your dream girl. Your brain is trying to convince you she is, but its not true. I would bet a LOT of money that if you married her tomorrow, you'd be div…
/r/seduction05/05/26 10:39 PM
2

Yes, even the best in the world get flaked on. But it becomes increasingly rare the higher up you get in skill. Does Jordan/Lebron miss free throws? Yes. Often? No. That said, you control less than 50% of the variables in any given interaction, so there are ALWAYS going to be a certain percentage of women who are never going to be interested no matter how good your skill is. Think of it like poker. If someone pulls a royal flush, youre not winning that hand no matter what you have. But better sk…
/r/seduction05/05/26 10:21 PM
1

This is a skill. If you want to get better at a skill, you have to train and practice, which means you gotta put in the reps. How many free throws do you have to shoot before you're good at basketball? That gives you an idea of how many women you're going to have to talk to before you're good at that too. Work your way up to 20-50 approaches per week and then do that for several years and you will be decent with women.
/r/seduction01/05/26 11:46 PM
1

No you don't understand, he calls it that because he invented it in 1995 and taught it to mystery in 2000. He also taught mystery to wear a top hat. That was from him. He's a legend
/r/seduction30/04/26 08:39 PM
2

Assume you are going to need 500-1000 reps before you have the skill to get 1 date. Then stop worrying about getting a date. Just get your reps in.
/r/seduction30/04/26 08:36 PM
2

Get a coach who will work with you 1 on 1 online to get you started with approaching. Or look for a coach in your country if they exist. Reading shit online is going to be a waste of time for you
/r/seduction30/04/26 08:35 PM
2

This isnt just AI slop, it's fucking BAD AI slop, because it doesnt tell us ANYTHING. It's pure abstract mental masturbation. You say to desensitize yourself. HOW do you desensitize yourself? HOW do you stay the same at extremes? HOW do you not overthink? HOW do you not have emotional spikes? There are all these claims of "just do X" but no explanation of how to do it, because that's the definition of AI Slop: Shit that sounds smart but has zero substance and isnt actionable. Sad that people are…
/r/seduction30/04/26 10:43 AM
1

It's laziness because you cant be bothered to write your own shit
/r/seduction30/04/26 10:39 AM
1

yeah its the unknown-unknown part of the quadrant, similar to unconscious incompetence. If you want to share screenshots or even potential ideas of what youre thinking about sending, ill give you my feedback and potential better options.
/r/seduction30/04/26 12:11 AM
1

Unless you are being VERY funny about something in your day, usually this is what every other guy is doing, so i would be cautious about this. There is no trick to hook interest other than "have better game" so focus on that. Be charismatic. Be charming. Be funny. Be confident. Etc. There are no (ethical) shortcuts. First step for most guys is to make her laugh (real laughter not polite or nervous laughter) constantly.
/r/seduction29/04/26 11:06 PM
2

Reach out again and start a conversation but do NOT immediately ask her out. Get a conversation started, ideally with humor. If youre not sure where to start, reference something you know about her, what you have in common, what you guys talked about previously, whatever. Get her laughing. Be witty if you can. Then when you have decent investment, seed another date idea. Talk it up but don't imply youre going to ask her out, just talk about it excitedly. If she gets excited, tell her you guys sh…
/r/seduction29/04/26 11:02 PM
1

Believe what you want, but my experience is firsthand and live. Its not hearsay or conjecture
/r/seduction29/04/26 10:43 PM
1

lol dude he's a dating coach, why are you so interested in his politics. I dont even know what his politics are, nor do i care. It made no different to his ability to wing me or to pull with me.
/r/seduction29/04/26 10:42 PM
1

yeah dude, most of my clients are in Socal, SF, Miami, and NYC. None of them are getting 100+ matches in 2 weeks on hinge premium at 5'6", even with optimized profiles and pro photos. The only guy who runs those numbers is 6'2", white, and good looking. And the C list celeb guys, but theyre doing that on Raya. Are you really good looking or is there another variable going on here?
/r/seduction29/04/26 11:16 AM
1

Write it in your native tongue and run it through google translate. It will be your exact words, but in English.
/r/seduction29/04/26 10:12 AM
2

Reps, man. Thousands and thousands of reps. Until you get that step down, nothing else matters. You're asking the same question on this thread a dozen different times but the answer is the same -- you have to be willing to do the reps. Like I said in the original post -- THERE IS NO MAGIC PILL.
/r/seduction29/04/26 10:01 AM
2

How many did you do?
/r/seduction29/04/26 09:59 AM
3

Technically, yes, but that phrasing often encourages people not to take any action unless they know for sure its the "right" action, so thats why I say "never made a change" more generically.
/r/seduction29/04/26 07:41 AM
3

Women's attraction is kind of strange. It doesn't work like ours. The closest description i can give you is that its sort of like a man's libido/horniness. Imagine youre really horny one night after talking to this girl who is kind of heavy and isnt very attractive, but it's been a while for you and she's also very sexually forward and is talking dirty in your ear so it gets you all riled up. Now imagine you end up not having sex for whatever reason, and you go home and go to bed. The next morni…
/r/seduction29/04/26 07:29 AM
2

You're either on seekingarrangement or you're significantly above average looking. 100+ matches in 2 weeks is "VERY good looking guy" territory and is not typical at all, at least in western countries.
/r/seduction29/04/26 07:09 AM
5

5'4" here + Asian. I'm playing the dating game on ultra hard mode so I know what you mean. How do you beat a game on ultra hard mode? Get good at the game. That's it. Nothing else works reliably. Sure, you can wear height enhancing shoes, you can wear more black, you can have better posture. All are okay ideas, but none of them will move the needle much if youre bad at the game, so thats what you want to focus on.
/r/seduction29/04/26 07:06 AM
2

The women are actually right here, but both untrained men and untrained women often give shitty dating advice so i wouldnt say that women's advice is universally trustworthy. There are a few mistakes you're making here: 1. You're giving up too soon. Women today are VERY on guard with guys who are low effort and who give up too soon because it implies the man is bitter, angry, and will make a poor romantic partner. The whole "dont double text" thing is stupid. Back in the day it was "dont call he…
/r/seduction29/04/26 07:02 AM
3

Women online are matching with dozens, sometimes hundreds of guys per week. You have to stand out if you want to move to a meetup. Doing and saying generic shit that every other guy does will get you thrown into the "i'll reply later if i'm bored" pile unless are you better looking than everyone else in her match list.
/r/seduction29/04/26 06:41 AM
3

So 3 things going on here: It sounds like you hired a bad coach who is in it for the money and not because he's good at teaching. I would never hire a coach who brags in general, but ESPECIALLY not one who brags about MAKING MONEY unless he's a coach trying to teach you how to make money. Otherwise, he's bragging about how effective he is at selling or potentially scamming. It's like trusting a doctor who brags about how much money he can make, not how much he can help patients. Go find a coach …
/r/seduction29/04/26 06:36 AM
2

What other skill do you learn by not doing a lot of reps because a lot of reps "sounds extreme"?
/r/seduction29/04/26 06:22 AM
1

dude you literally used AI to write the reply to a comment saying not to use AI lol. Cmon, really??
/r/seduction29/04/26 06:17 AM
1

Here's how you handle the talkative girl situation. She was nervous or uncomfortable, that's why she kept talking a ton in the bedroom. You need to either make her feel safe or lead the escalation through a pattern interrupt. If she's talking quickly or nervously, call it out ("hey, hey, hey... you're nervous and you're talking a million miles a minute. It's okay. (grab her hand.) I think you're adorable when youre nervous") She'll kind of laugh semi-embarrassed and usually she'll look down or s…
/r/seduction28/04/26 12:15 PM
3

This is how I know the community has changed since the early days. Back in the day this post would have blown up and people would be excited to analyze this data. The emphasis was on how we as nerds and dorks can use technique and data analysis in order to improve a skill set that we never learned when we were younger. The conclusions weren't always correct and we made a lot of mistakes along the way, but it's just sad that this subculture has now turned into "you dont need technique or skill, j…
/r/seduction28/04/26 11:59 AM
1

Nah, i winged with chase in 2006-2008 time frame in san diego. He's legit. Have seen him pull with my own eyes.
/r/seduction28/04/26 11:46 AM
6

what. the. fuck.
/r/seduction28/04/26 11:40 AM
1

You've seen short ugly guys with no game walk up to more attractive women, ask a bunch of questions, and then immediately get the girl into them with no other technique, attribute, or reason? Because that's what OP said his friend does, except his friend is tall and good looking. If you've seen that happen "many times," youre either mistaken or lying. Because that's not how real life works.
/r/seduction28/04/26 04:55 AM
2

Yup that's me. lol someone downvoted you for recognizing me. Cool to see guys get married and become success stories. Most of the old school coaches went on to other fields. Lost touch with a bunch of them. Mystery is still teaching, Owen is trying to rebrand because of all the controversy, Todd is obviously still around (though silo'ed into his own company). The old Mystery's Lounge shut down years ago and even the private groups for coaches are almost all marketing people now. The days of mASF…
/r/seduction28/04/26 01:27 AM
1

Would not recommend to watch it as an actual guide. It'd be like watching rambo to get your ready to join the army.
/r/seduction28/04/26 12:32 AM
5

It sounds like youre venting more than looking for advice. Nothing wrong with that, of course, but if you arent willing to put forth massive effort, youre not going to change your situation. The one thing that every 40 year old virgin has in common is that he was once a 30 year old virgin who never made a change.
/r/seduction28/04/26 12:30 AM
1

youre going to need to give us a LOT more information if you want non-generic advice dude
/r/seduction28/04/26 12:29 AM
1

That's not sound technique in general. That's sound technique for a tall good looking guy who is socially well adjusted and doesn't care about building a top tier skill set. What works for a gifted guy is not the same thing that works for a hard case.
/r/seduction28/04/26 12:16 AM
2

Either trial and error (get enough reps in and you'll be able to figure it out thru pure trial and error), or get a coach. A good coach can do troubleshooting and root cause analysis from screenshots, audio recordings, and/or description of symptoms. Occasionally if its a very complex or rare situation, he'll need to see your actual interactions to break down what's going on, but usually it's unnecessary if he's sufficiently experienced.
/r/seduction28/04/26 12:14 AM
2

His game is fine. The Keys to the VIP episode is almost 20 years old so the references and style are a bit outdated by today's standards but it's still better than 99% of guys.
/r/seduction27/04/26 11:30 AM
3

20-50 approaches per week, and don't go out trying to get laid or it will backfire due to neediness. Just focus on the reps and the results will come automatically.
/r/seduction27/04/26 11:08 AM
1

Several of the MM/LS guys were really good, especially for the time. Cajun, Future, Braddock, Sinn were standout. Sinn especially was one of the best teachers in the industry around that time. Learned so much from him during that era.
/r/seduction27/04/26 11:06 AM
2

Couple of us are still around but most people get burned out by this job because it's a lot of work so you really have to love it or its not worth it.
/r/seduction27/04/26 11:04 AM
2

I've met cajun several times back in the day. He does fine. This is not true at all.
/r/seduction27/04/26 11:03 AM
2

You dont even really need a full on dating coach right now. You just need someone to push you to approach. You might even be able to get a coach online who will help you be accountable. Once you have that, if youre doing a sufficient number of approaches but still arent happy with your results, THEN you can hire a coach to help you troubleshoot mistakes. But right now the main objective is just to get started and to get enough reps in.
/r/seduction27/04/26 10:30 AM
19

Yes and no. The whole giving your power away thing is stupid and just screams insecurity. But that doesn't mean that there's never a case for technique. Game can absolutely get too complex, especially for guys who are prone to overcomplicating or who just want fast results and are demographically advantaged enough to get results from pure boldness with no skill. You don't need to know MMA to win a fight if you're 6'5" 250lbs and are fighting an untrained 18 year old, 130lbs scrawny kid. But that…
/r/seduction27/04/26 08:40 AM
1

Don't hyper focus on the friendzone thing. It will do more damage than it will help you because it will make you come off super weird. There is no "dumplings-specific" escalation. Escalation is escalation. It doesn't generally change based on the food you eat.
/r/seduction27/04/26 08:34 AM
1

It's a lot tougher nowadays since the community essentially imploded on itself. Your best bet is to join online groups specific to your city and then reach out to see who is down to go out to do approaches together. Be willing to go out with anyone who approaches and over time you'll build a good base of wingmen.
/r/seduction26/04/26 11:51 PM
3

i mean it makes sense when you think about it, right? Some guys naturally do well in school and make it to an elite university with no tutoring or coaching, but others elect to take prep course and private tutoring to improve their chances. It's only weird because so many people assume that social skilsl arent really skills.
/r/seduction26/04/26 08:47 PM
2

Lol I wouldn't say its not a real job, it's just not credentialed. But neither is CEO, software engineer, or marketing director, and very few people would say those arent "real" jobs just because there's no academic credentials required. That said, you are correct that it's relatively difficult to pick a good one because there are so many bad ones out there. Here are some quick recommendations: Get a referral from someone else you know if possible. Preferably someone you trust or who has similar…
/r/seduction26/04/26 02:52 PM
6

Ignoring what I said and just reiterating your blackpill ideology (with zero actual evidence to back up your claim other than "trust me bro") does not strengthen your argument Ironically, you weakened your own argument by saying that all women care about is looks, and when you significantly improved your looks, your success did not improve.
/r/seduction26/04/26 01:44 PM
3

lol bro i'm a 5'4" asian guy who isnt very good looking. Are you really going to tell me that approaching doesnt work unless you're hot? You would be wise to gather more empirical data and critical thinking before forming a conclusion
/r/seduction26/04/26 01:01 PM
5

You're basically saying that there is no such thing as skill and that this is a pure numbers game and you can't ever improve your odds because your hit percentage always remains constant. If that were true, you should have the exact same results out of 100 approaches no matter how experienced you are. So youre saying if you get 1 date from approaches 1-100, you should also get no more than 1 date from approaches 10,000 to 10,100. So in other words, after 10 years of interacting with tens of thou…
/r/seduction26/04/26 12:34 PM
3

Yeah to be fair, I was one of the harder cases, but even today, most guys on a sub like this won't get good within 100 reps of their starting point. Best case is that they might get a date or two out of 100 approaches. I got my start in the early 2000s, so no, we didn't approach with "hi" back then. We approached with 3 hours of pre-scripted openers, conversational topics, gambits, routines, DHV stories and magic tricks lmao. We didnt leave until she walked away or asked us to leave. Probably wh…
/r/seduction26/04/26 12:01 PM
5

100%. I'm a 5'4" asian guy who grew up shy, sheltered, timid, and with very poor self esteem and social skills. Back in the day there was a term for guys like me -- WBAFC, which meant "way below [the] average, frustrated chump." And it was true. The only good thing is that very very few of my students today can say that they have it harder than I did or that i dont understand what its like to be them.
/r/seduction26/04/26 11:55 AM
12

I wouldn't even say 100. I think it took me close to 1000 before I had sex ONCE from a cold approach. And I was still bad skill-wise, just not celibate anymore. It took a good 3-4 years before I felt like I was decent skill wise.
/r/seduction26/04/26 11:43 AM
1

FYI the woman who did that ted talk -- amy cuddy -- later retracted her research because it turns out it was essentially bullshit/placebo. It turns out most of the data was fabricated from her research partners in order to get a headline-worthy result. Doesn't mean that acting confident doesn't ever work, of course, but just keep in mind that that particular TED talk isnt credible as research/evidence
/r/seduction26/04/26 10:54 AM
8

In most situations, you dont actually want to go out with regular friends. Because regular friends don't train, and you won't improve by going to the club with these guys who are afraid of approaching women and who get drunk so that at the end of the night they can make a few drunken grabs at women walking by. If you want to get better, you have to make it a point to hit 10-20 approaches per night, and they need to be approaches specifically designed for skill improvement. If you can do that sol…
/r/seduction26/04/26 10:50 AM
2

Obviously most of the basics apply here. Calibrate, use humor, escalate when appropriate, etc. But here are some car-specific tips: Be talkative. Do not let the conversation die or its going to get awkward af. Listen when she talks. Don't just wait for your turn to say something. ACTUALLY listen and pay attention to what she's saying, how she's feeling, her mannerisms, her body language, everything. Bring a few props with you that you just "happen to have in the car" to help if you run out of th…
/r/seduction26/04/26 10:41 AM
1

Lots of interesting theory you've written here but I've met my soul mate. And it's indeed real. That said, you are correct in that the idea that you will meet your soul mate and she will automatically fall in love with you even with zero work on your part is likely a fairy tale. You have to be HER soul mate as well, which means you have to put in the work to become that guy. It's not going to happen automatically. But if you put in the work and then you meet her, there is no other feeling like i…
/r/seduction26/04/26 10:12 AM
5

Not sure what country you're from but in many countries getting a coffee is a normal thing, even in the evening. People either get decaf, or tea, or snacks, or other drinks. Go into a Starbucks (especially a Starbucks reserve) in a major US city at 5 or 6pm. Usually packed.
/r/seduction24/04/26 06:04 AM
1

BIG YIKES
/r/seduction23/04/26 06:45 AM
1

The reason you're getting such poor answers to this question is because flaking is a sore spot for a lot of guys and so the situation is very triggering and people are responding out of anger/trauma. It's the same situation as if a girl said "how do i tell a guy i'm dating that he touched me in a way that I wasn't comfortable with?" The correct answer is "hey, can i be honest with you about something? The way that you touched my leg made me feel a little bit uncomfortable and I wanted to be able…
/r/seduction22/04/26 11:20 PM
4

Yeah he's projecting his own insecurities, thats why he's so triggered by your post.
/r/seduction22/04/26 10:59 PM
5

Dude. You need a coach, trust me. When you get to 40 years old without any success, youre stuck in a rut and you cant rely on "luck" to get you out of it. It's like that old adage -- if you keep doing what youve always done, you'll keep getting what you've always gotten. I have never seen anyone in the 40-year-old-virgin territory pull themselves out of that rut by themselves. Yes I'm a coach so I'm biased here, but im not saying to work with us. Work with anyone legitimate, just dont try to do …
/r/seduction22/04/26 10:31 PM
1

It depends on what you mean by resistance. There are many, many forms of resistance. You make eye contact and she breaks it. You talk to her but she doesnt engage much You ask her a question and she shrugs You touch her arm and she doesnt touch you back You touch her arm and she slaps you and say dont ever touch her again These examples are not all the same so it's impossible to answer the question without guessing at your definition.
/r/seduction22/04/26 09:31 AM
2

You don't pretend to compliment. You DO compliment. Is it always true? No, but i dont really have an issue with that any more than i have an issue saying "fine" when someone asks me how i am, even if i'm technically not fine. Why is that "lie" acceptable in my mind? Because i'm not hurting anyone. Therapists regularly advise women who are socially anxious to walk up to people and give them a compliment. Would I mind if a woman came up to me and told me she really liked my shirt or shoes or watch…
/r/seduction22/04/26 09:29 AM
1

Lol no, its a psychotherapy technique to reduce high levels of anxiety. Has nothing to do with degrading women, nor should it.
/r/seduction21/04/26 10:02 PM
1

"do you want the skill or the girl" takes me back, bro. The nostalgia. The new breed of community doesnt understand that concept at all because everything is so outcome focused.
/r/seduction21/04/26 07:12 AM
1

Agreed. It can be done without mentorship or coaching but its very very difficult. Imagine trying to play any sport super competitively without a coach. No one in their right mind would do that. Hell, even counter strike and league of legend players/teams have coaches now. And those are VIDEO GAMES.
/r/seduction21/04/26 07:10 AM
3

The right mindset: I'm going out to improve, not to get a result from women. Which means go out focusing on a particular part of the skill where you're weak. If you successfully did the reps, you succeeded that night, regardless of whether you got a result with women. That will prevent you from going out trying to get women to like/validate you, which will cause you to get needy and will be discouraging if you don't get it. Outcome will naturally come with skill. Don't focus on it or you'll sacr…
/r/seduction15/04/26 02:20 PM
1

Not sure if this is the right sub specifically for dating advice as this is a sub to help people exit the red pill mentality. That doesnt automatically predispose it to be a good place for advice outside of that context. But I'm open to being proven wrong. That said, you're young, man, you have plenty of years ahead of you to find the one. Unless you have a terminal illness, you arent under any time crunch. A handful of dates in 18 months means you likely aren't going on enough dates to really f…
/r/ExRedPill15/04/26 09:13 AM
1

Saying that looks are a variable that matters is not blackpill. Ironically, it's bluepill because it's one of the most mainstream ideas that exists and is something that people have believed for at least a hundred years, if not longer.
/r/seduction15/04/26 06:59 AM
1

Wait did you shrink? You've been 5'5" your entire career. When did you become 5'4"?
/r/seduction15/04/26 06:54 AM
1

Text back: 95% Eventual date: 50-70% Keep in mind I've been in an LTR for >8 years, but these were my most recent numbers before that
/r/seduction12/04/26 07:11 AM
1

Rob Judge! This is Fuji. Long time no see, brother. Glad to see youre still around. Almost all of our brethren have bailed to other industries. FYI if the rest of you guys are like "wow this guys comment is really solid," it's because Rob's been around a long ass time and is one of the OGs at this point.
/r/seduction12/04/26 02:47 AM
2

Agreed, that's why you train in a big city. I used to drive 2 hours one way to the nearest large city every single weekend in order to train in the right environment. If you dont live in driving distance to a larger city... then move.
/r/seduction11/04/26 11:13 PM
3

20-50 approaches per week for a year solves most problems
/r/seduction11/04/26 10:40 PM
1

You must not have met very many men from this community
/r/seduction11/04/26 11:01 AM
1

Saying game is just flirting is like saying basketball is just shooting. It's an important aspect, for sure, but it's a vast oversimplification. But more importantly than that, I'd say greater than 90% of guys who are here aren't struggling from not flirting enough. They're struggling with POOR SOCIAL SKILLS, which is why "I run out of things to say" and "i don't approach women" have always been the most common sticking points.
/r/seduction11/04/26 10:50 AM
1

The difference is that cold approach doesn't have the same ceiling that online does. Cold approach isn't limited by an algorithm instituted by a company trying to limit your results in order to maximize profits.
/r/seduction11/04/26 10:44 AM
2

Copying and pasting a reply I wrote to another guy with the same question a few weeks ago: ----- Depends on context but I define flirting as wittiness/humor + light/implied interest There's a million ways to do this, which makes it difficult to learn. One of the best ways to get your feet wet is to learn what we call "flirting sound bites" which are funny situational comments that are predictably witty and/or flirty. Using them will give you some early wins and experience and will teach you deli…
/r/seduction10/04/26 05:04 AM
2

It's not sustainable for the average guy who wants to put in avg effort. Avg effort no longer cuts it. Sort of like how the economy won't support an avg person who wants an avg income but still wants a house (unless you live in arkansas). So your options are work your ass off to be in the top 10%, or suffer like the other 90%.
/r/seduction09/04/26 09:23 PM
9

Look into MAPS, specifically MDMA-Assisted Psychotherapy. Hard to find but very effective. Works very well for therapy-resistant issues like this
/r/ExRedPill09/04/26 08:18 PM
9

Based on your comments you don't sound like you've truly left the redpill. You might not identify with redpill creators anymore, but you still use their terminology, their talking points, their beliefs, and are clearly engaging with their content.
/r/ExRedPill07/04/26 12:26 AM
2

Everyone in the comments arguing against your point is precisely why the vast vast majority of men will never succeed at cold approach. Because getting over fear is the first step and is the barrier to entry for almost everyone.
/r/seduction06/04/26 08:30 PM
1

The key difference is that most people arent trying to use AI to generate fake expertise on a subject (usually for monetary reasons, too). It would be like telling your boss that you deserve a raise because you just graduated from harvard medical school and then sending him AI photos of you at the harvard graduation ceremony and an AI generated diploma.
/r/seduction04/04/26 07:34 AM
6

Are you constantly consuming redpill and blackpill content and then wondering why you seem to be falling down that rabbit hole?
/r/ExRedPill04/04/26 07:08 AM
1

You arent struggling due to small talk or not having enough in common. You're struggling because youre trying to impress her and because you can't carry an INTERESTING conversation unless the woman is helping you or investing in the conversation to where it becomes easy to hold a conversation. This is all very normal for guys starting out. In most cases like this, students will struggle to hold a basic conversation even with women he isnt particularly attracted to (unless she's helping him). If …
/r/seduction04/04/26 07:06 AM
2

Wow i think you're right. I'm very hesitant to make accusations of AI unless its very obvious because i think its a cheap attack that is mostly used when people dont like the content. But in this case i think you have a point. This does follow the language patterns of AI a lot, but with grammar and punctuation changed around a bit to try to disguise it.
/r/seduction04/04/26 06:23 AM
1

Roughly, yes, but it's a relatively advanced skill to be able to turn around negative investment like that, so I wouldn't advise most guys practice it unless they're already at a fairly advanced level.
/r/seduction03/04/26 05:37 PM
2

I'll take a look. Keep in mind though that just like a boxing coach who doesn't correct your form, doing reps without correction often leads to practicing bad habits. Better than nothing, for sure, but less than optimal without correction. Edit: looks like android users are out of luck lol
/r/seduction03/04/26 05:23 PM
1

Haven't used your app obviously but from what I've seen of current AI models, they're not ready for prime time yet. Sometimes they get things right but often they don't, and to a new student that can't tell the difference, that's very dangerous because it can teach him the wrong techniques which now become bad habits. If you look at some of the things that AI tries to recommend sending as flirting, they're super super bad. Just a limitation of the current technology. I'm sure it will improve in …
/r/seduction03/04/26 05:18 PM
1

What youre describing is EXACTLY what i use with students to get them faster improvements than just approaching a lot, and im saying that as a guy who is a big proponent of getting 20-50 reps in per week in order to make meaningful improvements. The problem with structured practice isnt that it doesnt work, its that it requires a coach (and a good coach) to do effectively. Imagine youre trying to learn boxing by getting in a lot of boxing matches, getting your ass kicked, and then trying to lear…
/r/seduction03/04/26 05:03 PM
1

Yup, all of the above. Even women who have been actively hostile on the approach ("fuck off"). Ironically, actively hostile is easier to deal with than unresponsive and apathetic. Those are the hardest ones because you're getting nothing to work with. Don't get me wrong, it's not like EVERY approach I did got huge huge disinterest which I was magically able to turn around. Damage control is still a relatively low probability scenario. But given enough skill, it stops becoming impossible. Even wi…
/r/seduction03/04/26 09:28 AM
1

its not helpful because youre more committed to the idea of things being hopeless than to finding a solution. You want your shitty beliefs to be right more than you want to improve your situation. That is the problem.
/r/seduction03/04/26 03:07 AM
1

Prove it. Post your picture. I will be honest with you if you are so ugly that i dont think there's anything you can do. But I have yet to come across that situation. You can even DM me your pic if you dont want to post it publicly. And for the record, the number of reps you'd need are in the THOUSANDS. Have you done THOUSANDS of approaches? I highly doubt it.
/r/seduction03/04/26 03:03 AM
2

You havent put in sufficient reps. I guarantee you. Half of my coaching program is autistic and often very below average looking. Makes things more difficult, but it's not impossible. That said, we have no current data on success or feasibility for level 3 autism, so if thats you (which i highly doubt, given your comment), the jury is still out. You don't HAVE to change your mindset or beliefs around who you are, how the world works, and whats possible, but i can guarantee you that if you do NOT…
/r/seduction02/04/26 08:28 PM
1

Very good question. Modern psychology considers personality to be centered around the "big 5" aka "OCEAN" -- Openness, Conscientiousness, Extraversion, Agreeableness, and Neuroticism. You can look up this concept on youtube or at psychologytoday if you want more info -- tons of stuff written about it. By contrast, "game" is a collection of skills. So a good way to think about it is skills that you acquire through practice are primarily game, and traits you possess that are more static and geneti…
/r/seduction02/04/26 08:22 PM
3

lmao post history checks out
/r/seduction02/04/26 07:04 PM
1

Move to a large town or at least be willing to drive to a larger town (300k+ people) to practice your social skills. Do 20-50 interactions a week, mostly in said larger town, even if you drive 2-3 hours to get there every weekend Every week, analyze where your made mistakes and how to improve Be willing to do this for 2-5 years, depending on bad youre starting out and how good you want to get.
/r/seduction02/04/26 08:00 AM
0

Thats crazy talk. The women's market for mentors is MUCH bigger than men's. That's why Hussey transitioned from coaching men to coaching women. Tons more money in that market.
/r/seduction02/04/26 07:54 AM
2

Damn, fucking well said, man. 100% truth. This comment needs to be stickied in this sub.
/r/seduction02/04/26 07:53 AM
13

Youre not automatically doing it wrong. Youre doing it wrong because you suck at it because you havent put in the reps yet. Theres nothing intrinsically rotten or unattractive about you -- you just lack the reps necessary to be skillful at approaching. Do a few thousands reps and you'll see major improvement.
/r/seduction02/04/26 07:52 AM
2

What do you mean you cant find enough girls weekly? Do you live in siberia or something? Are you only trying to approach attractive women exactly your age or something? Action almost always trumps reading or watching videos so i would start there. I did my first approach before i ever read a single book and it was the best thing i ever did.
/r/seduction02/04/26 03:39 AM
1

yeah its a good starting point
/r/seduction02/04/26 03:38 AM
2

Depends on what you need. For general mindset/ beliefs, it's hard to beat mark's book. For tactics I haven't found a good one that was written this decade. All of the ones I've seen are pretty bad and are obviously written by guys who don't have any experience actually cold approaching. Good advice is remarkably hard to come by because even if the guy knows what he's talking about, which is very rare, it only makes sense if he's coming from the same place you are. If he's a 6'2 good looking guy …
/r/seduction01/04/26 08:24 PM
2

haha yeah that fucking mohawk used to take an hour minimum to do. I wouldnt wear it up during day game, too weird. Day game is all about being normal + having great social skills. It did help immensely with learning to withstand social pressure though. A lot of people thought that the mohawk was to stand out or peacock. And it did accomplish that, but that wasnt the main benefit. The main benefit is to learn to stop giving a shit about what strangers think about you. You learn to be okay with pe…
/r/seduction01/04/26 05:22 PM
1

You dont ever get rid of it. You learn to manage it. But for most guys, it never goes away, it just reduces and becomes more manageable. It's like that bruce lee quote about "dont pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a hard one". Number of approaches to overcome that crippling feeling varies by individual. On the low end a hundred or two, on the high end several thousand.
/r/seduction01/04/26 03:43 PM
1

"Game" is really just the composite of dozens or possibly hundreds of individual sub-skills all put together. Much in the same way as "good fighter" really means youve trained hundreds of individual skills that all combined, make you a formidable opponent in the ring. For game, these are things like approaching, transitioning, conversational basics, leading, humor, teasing, flirting, escalation, frame control, confidence, calibration, belief systems, skill in the bedroom, the ability to troubles…
/r/seduction01/04/26 07:02 AM
2

Thanks man. To be fair, its not like i had a choice in the matter lol. There are more women who have a fetish for getting shit on than who have a fetish for short asian men. So it was either get good or die alone. I doubt i would have developed this skill set to the same extent if i was a 6 foot tall good looking guy.
/r/seduction28/03/26 10:32 PM
2

Do it. Reps are reps, and different environments challenge you in different ways. You want to be well rounded and not a guy who can only meet women if youre in a night club. It's like only being able to fight if you have a sword on you.
/r/seduction28/03/26 10:29 PM
1

How do i know it the bf and not the brother or friend? Let's assume a guy in a bar walks up, kisses the girl and says hello. I usually laugh, shake his hand, tell him "my bad bro, no disrespect" and often offer to buy him a drink. 99.9% of the time he's super cool about it so I never really worry that things are going to go bad. I can't remember the last time there was an issue
/r/seduction28/03/26 06:03 PM
1

Lol yeah crazy, almost like a 4-5 out of 10 in facial aesthetics before factoring in height/ethnicity, right?
/r/seduction28/03/26 04:46 PM
1

First 50 interactions were all in clubs and 49 of them were probably instant blow outs. I expected that to happen just like you expect to get your ass handed to you the first time you play call of duty knowing that youre going to be playing against random kids online who have played every day for the last 15 years. I wasnt concerned so much with overthinking it as trying to will myself to approach in spite of crippling anxiety. If I managed to do it, that was a win. Don't expect results for the …
/r/seduction28/03/26 03:24 AM
3

If we evaluate this objectively and mathematically, a 3-4 is an accurate assessment. Here's how I came up with that: Objective looks based analyses put me at somewhat average to below average facial aesthetics which, if we look at a standard bell curve, means that my face is in the 4-5 range. However, I'm also 5'4" and Asian, which in America infers a 1-2 point penalty given how people tend to judge both of those variables. So if you put that together that comes out to a 3-4/10. I don't look in …
/r/seduction27/03/26 04:53 PM
5

Yeah tons of books, boot camps, 1-on-1 training, and mentorship from most of the big names of my era (2000s), though i wouldnt necessary recommend those same books, resources, etc today because this was all >20 years ago, so following that same stuff now would be like trying to study computer science by reading programming textbooks from the 1980s. Very outdated. Probably 80% of my progress came from practical application infield + working with my coaches to specifically work on my sticking poin…
/r/seduction27/03/26 08:39 AM
1

What do you mean? Overthink which part?
/r/seduction27/03/26 02:04 AM
13

Oh sorry did you want to buy the one weird trick course that would get you any girl no matter how fat you are or how bad your game is? Only 3 easy payments of 199.95! Order today! But wait there's more! All orders come with a free ebook on how to spell easy words like "nonsense"!
/r/seduction26/03/26 11:04 PM
22

The answer is similar to the answer to "how do you beat a guy who is much bigger than you in a fight": You have to be a better fighter. There is no simple punch or technique that makes you a better fighter. No secret "trick." You simply have to train the skill set to the point where you are more skilled than your competition. This is why it takes 3 years for basic competence, ~5 years to be decent, and 10+ years to be very skilled. Expect to put in 5,000-10,000+ reps/interactions before you reac…
/r/seduction26/03/26 08:40 PM
33

I'm a 3-4 out of 10 and almost never get physical attraction off the bat, though i will sometimes trigger attraction from the approach or from fashion/style in a nightclub setting. Almost all of my relationships and successful interactions are cold conversions from no initial interest. That's just the nature of being a 5'4", below average looking asian guy. I didnt develop game because i'm talented. I developed it because i had no other choice. Hard to rely on looks when you dont have them. My c…
/r/seduction26/03/26 05:26 PM
1

holy shit, paragraphs please
/r/seduction25/03/26 02:06 AM
7

Wait, if women theoretically have tons of options, why in the hell would she settle for you if you're truly inferior? You think a woman with that many options HAS to settle? So either the "women all have options" thing is bullshit and she's settling for you because she has no other options... Or she DOES have a lot of options, but she's CHOOSING YOU because she actually likes you and thinks highly of you.
/r/ExRedPill24/03/26 07:23 PM
2

No, the solution is to figure out which of the 3 root causes you're dealing with, Einstein.
/r/seduction24/03/26 06:05 AM
6

Theres no secret. Force yourself to take action if you dont want to have to have to rely on women choosing you.
/r/seduction24/03/26 05:50 AM
1

If she's losing interest as soon as you text, either your text game blows, you didnt have as much investment as you thought, or she was super drunk when you met her.
/r/seduction24/03/26 05:48 AM
1

This frame doesnt generally create attraction. It keeps things from getting too platonic and often prevents you from getting stuck in the friend zone, but it doesnt do the heavy lifting of creating attraction. u/YoungCaesar: "man to woman" frame is what RSD calls talking to a woman non-platonically. I don't love the concept, not because it's wrong but because it's too abstract and too hard for most guys to practice because its too ethereal. It's like saying "just be confident." Most of the imple…
/r/seduction23/03/26 07:54 AM
1

Your analysis is pretty spot on. You're essentially going from "hello" to "can i get your number" without much in between except small talk. This works when the customer really really wants the product already (because she thinks youre super attractive), but if you aren't genetically gifted, this tends not to work so well (ask me how i know). The missing component, as you've noted, is attraction building. Generally you do this through either: Laughter/wit Intrigue (e.g., being interesting) There…
/r/seduction23/03/26 07:49 AM
1

$100 says your conversations are boring and you're getting flakey numbers because you're focusing on getting a number rather than making sure your interactions are solid in the first place.
/r/seduction22/03/26 12:47 PM
3

both. 20-50 sets a week is very hard to get practicing one day per week
/r/seduction21/03/26 06:15 PM
1

I used to say that looksmaxxing is stupid because it's the equivalent of taking meth and fucking up your body just to lose weight, but then they started taking meth to lose weight and the analogy doesnt make sense anymore because it's real life. So i guess it's more like the equivalent of hitting your face with a hammer in order to try to.... oh wait... Fuck
/r/seduction21/03/26 05:36 AM
2

If youre not VERY good looking, your best bet is to get pro photos that dont look posed. That will make the biggest difference. No one looks at the prompts until she's already interested from your pictures.
/r/seduction21/03/26 05:31 AM
1

You misspelled surgery
/r/seduction21/03/26 12:43 AM
1

Damn bro i didnt know you used to be a fitness model. That's sick. Very cool to get that perspective given most guys here assume that fitness models must be playing the game on super easy mode.
/r/seduction21/03/26 12:42 AM
2

yeah the term was first coined by Mihály Csíkszentmihályi. He was called the "father of flow." I was fucking with OP because he wrote "something I call the 'flow state'" like he invented it haha
/r/seduction20/03/26 08:42 PM
4

You have to give us a bit more info on HOW your text game is bad. It's like going to the doctor and saying "something hurts." Maybe post a few screenshots as examples or something
/r/seduction20/03/26 01:50 AM
2

Highest probability here is that you misread signals and she wasnt as interested as you thought. Women often feign interest in real life because it's super awkward (esp in social circle or events like this hockey thing) for her to be rude and tell you she's not interested in you. There's also a possibility that she is actually busy or that she suddenly started dating someone she likes, but it's more likely (esp if you get this a lot) that you're misreading things.
/r/seduction19/03/26 11:13 PM
6

Legit post. I work with a lot of autistic guys and i'm ND myself and this rings true. Won't hold it against you that you ripped off "flow state" from Mihály Csíkszentmihályi's books from the 1970s :)
/r/seduction19/03/26 07:28 PM
2

it doesnt sound like chatgpt at ALL. Dont use that as a generic attack when theres no evidence for it.
/r/seduction19/03/26 07:23 PM
2

He's not only an interesting cow, he's a funny and insecure one too
/r/seduction19/03/26 07:21 PM
22

Doesnt read like AI at all, actually. And i'm particularly sensitive to AI slop.
/r/seduction19/03/26 07:19 PM
5

This is a great sentiment, but functionally speaking, if your social skills are underdeveloped or absent and youre weirding the fuck out of people, it would be in your best interest to learn to correct those deficiencies. In those situations, it does you no good to tell yourself, "i dont need to convince anyone that im normal." You are correct, you do not need to convince anyone. But women also don't need to date you either.
/r/seduction19/03/26 07:15 PM
9

Spot on, brother. Keep fighting the good fight.
/r/ExRedPill19/03/26 03:56 PM
17

I work in a field where I have to un-brainwash redpill guys on a daily basis so i have a fair amount of experience with the subculture. 99% of them are NOT geting laid. The celibacy that most of them are experiencing is exactly what drives them to the misogyny of redpill -- it becomes a coping mechanism to justify their lack of success. The avg red pill guy is doing significantly worse than the avg man in the general population, both in dating and in overall life success.
/r/ExRedPill19/03/26 03:56 PM
1

thats exactly why this subculture exists
/r/seduction18/03/26 09:17 PM
–

Ohhh that makes sense. It was likely an abandonment trigger. Its not specific to redpill groups unfortunately.
/r/ExRedPill17/03/26 09:00 PM
1

Weird, ive never heard of this. Did you go scorched earth when you left or something? Usually when guys leave these communities its quiet and hardly anyone really notices. It's like when you stop playing an online game. Your friends might ask where you've been but theyre rarely angry that you dont have time for it anymore.
/r/ExRedPill17/03/26 08:37 PM
1

The guys I was talking about were mostly random lair guys, not people specifically mentioned in the game, although there were a few people in the game who were/still are weirdos. Keep in mind about 30-40% of that book is fiction too, so there were a lot of fabricated stories. Remember "stylechild," the guy who looked exactly like style and dressed like him and was trying to be a mini-me of him? Yeah that story was made up. Stylechild was my wing. He was an indian software engineer with great fas…
/r/seduction17/03/26 08:34 PM
15

If youre on the dance floor, keep full on conversation to a minimum. It's strange in most night clubs to try to have a full conversation on the dance floor. Conversation is mostly limited to basic questions, quick teasing/humor, and occasional flirting. But you arent having a full getting-to-know-you discussion there. Once you move OFF the dance floor, though, thats where you'll need to have decent conversational skills. The keys to this are: Stop thinking of what to say Stop asking questions yo…
/r/seduction17/03/26 08:30 PM
1

Not when you dont understand them
/r/seduction17/03/26 08:29 AM
1

Youre knee-deep in pickup jargon and concepts from the early 2000s, man. Most of those concepts are severely outdated. It's like talking about this cutting edge new "leech bloodletting" medical technology. It's also making you weird. Specifically: 99% of shit tests are not shit tests. Best to assume its NOT a shit test or you'll miscalibrate. Don't micromanage your "value." Just makes you a weirdo. "Maintaining your frame" or "holding your frame" almost always makes you seem insecure and weird. …
/r/seduction17/03/26 05:42 AM
3

Smile a lot + Warm vibe + make women laugh + glasses
/r/seduction17/03/26 05:29 AM
4

You basically want to calibrate to the individual and to the situation. Right now you're brute forcing things by trying to flirt and escalate with everyone until you get a rejection or resistance. That's why women are saying youre too forward. You should NOT be getting that response on a regular basis. It's like if you're a car sales guy and you keep getting customers telling you that you're too pushy. Thats a big warning sign that youre push too hard. You're not escalating when it is strategica…
/r/seduction17/03/26 05:27 AM
7

You're basing this "theres something wrong" on random posts youre reading on the internet. Be very very careful about who you listen to online. I learned this the hard way back when we had "lairs" and individual city forums circa 2005. I would be in awe of the stories some of the guys would tell, convinced that I could never get to their level. Then I would meet those guys at a lair meetup and it was SO OBVIOUS they were 40 year old virgins who had never talked to a woman. I was utterly shocked …
/r/seduction17/03/26 05:21 AM
3

Facts
/r/seduction17/03/26 05:16 AM
7

Youre doing brute force/numbers game. It's good to get you past the beginner phases but once youve overcome AA, you want to start working on some finesse. You can't just be throwing up the ball every time you get it just to say you took the shot. Gotta start working on form, accuracy, and skill. Women are frequently telling you that you're too aggressive because youre still doing the "always be closing" methodology. Any good salesman will tell you that that sales strategy is for noobs. Which is …
/r/seduction17/03/26 05:15 AM
1

Completely unnecessary attack
/r/seduction17/03/26 05:06 AM
3

Nah, i did in previous relationships but once i found the one, I wanted that to be the last approach I ever did.
/r/seduction17/03/26 04:59 AM
2

Hard to say whether this would be the same in every country, but my girl gets approached constantly in LA / Las Vegas. Sometimes she gets approached during the day WHILE IM STANDING NEXT TO HER. So yeah, that whole thing about women not getting approached is largely not true except in rare situations (e.g., party where everyone knows we're together)
/r/seduction17/03/26 02:53 AM
5

Last Approach: - Where was it: at work - When? Over 8 years ago - What did you say to start the conversation? "Hey" - What did you talk to her about after that? Work - How did it end? We're still together :D
/r/seduction17/03/26 02:50 AM
2

Yes these are good general guidelines. Most guys wont be able to do them, so dont feel bad if they seem unrealistic at the beginning. Work up to them.
/r/seduction17/03/26 02:47 AM
2

lol god im old
/r/seduction17/03/26 02:47 AM
2

HR from anxiety/fear? 100%. It's well documented in the scientific literature. Look it up.
/r/seduction16/03/26 05:21 AM
4

That's exactly how you do it. Most of the time fear or anxiety are the biggest hurdles so you do something called progressive desensitization, otherwise known as exposure therapy, to gradually expose yourself to more and more of the stimulus until you can effectively manage the fear that would have previously caused an anxiety attack.
/r/seduction16/03/26 04:08 AM
1

There is no "right" strategy for everyone. The right strategy is what makes sense for YOU. Are you a 40 year old autistic virgin? Are you a 16 year old who has 4 girlfriends at your high school? Strategy is going to be VERY different for different people.
/r/seduction16/03/26 12:00 AM
6

Fantastic post as usual, gus. Very well written and spot on.
/r/seduction15/03/26 01:33 PM
11

This. Women get slut shamed way more than men get shamed for their sexual desire.
/r/seduction15/03/26 01:17 PM
1

Go make it rain at a strip club then. You'll have all the fake attention you can handle.
/r/seduction15/03/26 01:07 PM
1

Upvote for "floozies" lol. Haven't heard that term in years
/r/seduction15/03/26 01:06 PM
-1

Attractive, famous, and miserable sounds like a bad deal. I'd take not attractive, short, not famous, and super happy any day of the week.
/r/seduction15/03/26 01:03 PM
4

At the top .0001%, the best naturals will always outperform the best synthetic pick up guys. And I say this as a guy who's been around since the mystery days.
/r/seduction15/03/26 04:42 AM
2

What is a significant portion? Like 5 or 10%? Because ive done a lot of live events, conferences, conventions, etc and have probably met thousands of guys in the community throughout the years and very few of them have come across gay. And I can usually tell. Unless you mean that most of these guys are the types of guys who can evade gaydar.
/r/seduction15/03/26 04:37 AM
4

Insufficient leading Insufficient confidence / being sure of yourself Insufficient flirting Insufficient sexual tension
/r/seduction14/03/26 07:23 AM
5

FYI any coach who says you should never tell a girl you like her is either giving you very narrow context that you're not understanding... or is a garbage coach. Even Mystery, the godfather of indirect game, pulled me aside one time in '05 and told me, "you have to tell her you like her, man."
/r/seduction13/03/26 08:52 AM
3

100% dead on. And yeah, i missed the reference to the relationship/bf thing too until i read the replies below.
/r/seduction13/03/26 08:50 AM
3

Do not pursue married women. It fucks with your ability to trust women long term because you expose yourself to a disproportionate amount of infidelity so you start seeing all women as cheaters. In America you also expose yourself to husbands with shotguns lol
/r/seduction12/03/26 09:49 PM
11

You seem to be conflating "considerate" with "doormat" and "selfish" with "assertive" They are not the same thing. I consider myself considerate but not a doormat, and assertive but not selfish. And I do way better than I should at dating.
/r/seduction12/03/26 05:26 AM
1

3-4 days or nights per week, 10 approaches per session. Any busy area works. Bars, pubs, clubs, malls, busy streets, etc
/r/seduction11/03/26 02:35 AM
1

How long does each set last when you're fairly new to cold approach? About 30 sec to 1 min. That's 10-25 minutes of interactions per week. Even after you get some experience, you'll likely avg no more than 5-10 minutes per set. That's 100-500 minutes per week, or 2-8 hours per week. Yes, there's travel time, time between sets, etc. But consider this: The average American spends 17 hours a week on social media
/r/seduction10/03/26 05:53 PM
1

Ideally respond with wit or humor. Easier said then done, yes. But humor is likely going to be the most effective technique to create investment here. If you want to post the screenshot with the most recent conversation ill give you some pointers on where to take it. Just remove identifying details.
/r/seduction10/03/26 05:47 AM
1

I mean after the initial exchange. After the beginning of the conversation you said she stopped investing. That's essentially her indicating disinterest. You can push this a bit further if you'd like, but if she continues not investing, i'd let it go.
/r/seduction10/03/26 05:28 AM
1

The fact that she didn't ever ask to see your pictures (or ask anything about you) means she isnt very invested in you or getting to know you. Likely due to the mistakes you made in your texting. Chalk it up to a learning lesson and keep practicing.
/r/seduction10/03/26 04:54 AM
1

Wait where did you DM her? I assumed it was IG but you said she doesnt know what you look like
/r/seduction10/03/26 04:46 AM
1

Very true. You need the skill and XP developed from tons of reps with all types of opponents before youre ready for the final boss.
/r/seduction10/03/26 03:28 AM
1

Sorry I should have clarified. Do 20-50 approaches a week without paying any real attention to how attracted you are to the girl, at least in the beginning phases. Once you have overcome approach anxiety and resistance to approaching, then you can start working on skill development, and once you have the skill, then you can start working on approaching women youre attracted to. It doesnt mean prioritize the ugliest women you can find -- it just means dont be picky when youre training. It's like …
/r/seduction10/03/26 03:27 AM
1

For someone who wrote, "I'm not here to argue; I'm here to understand", you sure seem to be doing a lot of arguing with everyone here. Especially for someone who readily admitted to struggling to understand how confidence works and who struggles to achieve any kind of success in dating. I can see why someone else here wrote, "youre not as smart as you think you are." You're also moving the goalposts in every reply. First you said "looks are the most important factor" and "actions will never repl…
/r/seduction10/03/26 03:16 AM
3

The reason I advise guys to shoot for a minimum number of approaches per week is not because quantity is inherently the end-all, be-all and guys should spam approaches to get women to like them. Far from it. It's because the number one thing holding guys back in a community like this is ironically not skill, it's APPROACH ANXIETY. The vast majority of guys approach abysmally small numbers of women because they're scared. No judgment, i did exactly the same thing when I was a student. So if you t…
/r/seduction09/03/26 11:01 PM
1

Everyone who says that they believe in the research has strangely not read the scientific literature on the subject or they would know that science does not find a single universal “most important” factor, but across large offline samples women consistently weight personality/relationship qualities and resources/status more heavily than pure looks, especially for long‑term attraction. But even just looking at this through the lens of basic logic, your argument of "actions will never replace phys…
/r/seduction09/03/26 10:54 PM
1

If that was true, I never would have gotten with my SO. There was zero physical attraction from her when we first met. You seem strangely confident in your assumptions of how attraction works or doesn't work despite your admission that you aren't successful at it.
/r/seduction09/03/26 09:45 PM
1

I'm mid 40s and have been in this industry for a long time so ive seen the good, the bad, and the ugly. It's not too late when you hit a certain age. It's too late when you hit the mental stage where you give up, stop trying, or become the old dog that can't learn new tricks. I've trained guys in their 50s that did fine. And i've turned away guys in their 20s who gave up and refused to put in the work.
/r/seduction09/03/26 11:01 AM
86

Grind 20-50 approaches/interactions a week with the expectation that it will take years to get good at this Focusing on skill development rather than outcomes Constantly learn from guys who were better than me, both wings and coaches Be willing to get good at this or die trying
/r/seduction09/03/26 10:56 AM
3

Fear of rejection is built into our emotional circuitry. It's like being scared of heights. Almost everyone is to some extent. The key is to learn to manage the fear and not let it stop you.
/r/seduction08/03/26 11:53 PM
2

Fair. I'll answer your questions here then: How can a person have self-confidence if they have no past evidence of success to be confident in? Or how can I be confident in my basketball skills if I have never won a basketball game? You won't have SITUATIONAL confidence (e.g., confidence based on you being good at something) if you've never been successful at a specific skill. This is why you don't shoot for confidence at the beginning -- you shoot for COMPETENCE. Get good at it FIRST, then you'l…
/r/seduction08/03/26 11:07 PM
1

oh they'll definitely try, i've seen them literally say that it is categorically impossible for anyone under 5'8" to date. I asked how it's possible that I've dated a ton at 5'4" and one guy literally said my pics with my SO are AI and I'm a virgin pretending to have a 20 year career as a dating coach lmao.
/r/seduction08/03/26 10:05 AM
2

u/TheDarkKnight2001, it doesnt look like youre actually engaging with any of the comments so i'm not sure if you're actually even reading these. Would encourage you to engage with people trying to help you. One thing you might not be considering is that SOME of what you read is correct but other shit people tell you is bullshit garbage. Most newbies can't tell the difference between the two, which is why it seems like there is so much information that is nonsensical or conflicting.
/r/seduction08/03/26 10:00 AM
1

Time invested in improving skill (including talking to women who are initially unreceptive) is a worthwhile endeavor. Time wasted by being needy is not.
/r/seduction07/03/26 11:54 PM
23

lol how many times are you going to try to plug your shawty app and pretend youre not affiliated with it? At least be transparent if youre going to advertise your app
/r/seduction07/03/26 10:32 PM
4

Reps, brother. This is a skill. And skills take time, effort, and consistency to acquire, including the ability to not panic during an approach. This is why i tell guys to do 20-50 approaches a week. You need reps to both get over the panic and to teach you how to execute on all of that theory you read. Reading stuff is not the same as being able to execute it. You can read a million books on boxing, but the only way you become a good boxer is to practice it over and over again. This specific pr…
/r/seduction07/03/26 02:22 PM
12

The primary problem with the red pill / black pill from a scientific standpoint (i work in a red pill-adjacent field) is that it's not designed around evolutionary biology, it CHERRY PICKS evolutionary biology to suit it's central agenda, which is misogyny and bitterness towards women. Red pill / black pill are intellectually dishonest because they conveniently leave out all elements of evolutionary biology that don't fit neatly into their agenda. That's not science. That's looking for evidence …
/r/ExRedPill04/03/26 04:08 PM
1

You'd be pretty shocked at what fashion/physique can do for men. You won't be a 10, but you can make some pretty shocking transformations in looks and you can def create the illusion of hotness to a lot of women. Look at Jeff Cavalier from Athlean-X. That dude is genetically not very attractive. Same with Usher. But theyre both in fantastic shape and that gives the illusion of being good looking even though they're both significantly below average in facial aesthetics.
/r/seduction04/03/26 04:00 PM
0

Honesty without tact is cruelty or stupidity. Honesty is not a binary, it's a spectrum. And you have to make a judgment call on how far into that spectrum is appropriate. Should you be honest with a woman that you don't want to keep hanging out? Probably. Should you tell her youre breaking up with her because she's just too fat for you to get it up? Probably not.
/r/seduction04/03/26 03:50 PM
1

Can you give me specific symptoms? "Dysregulated" and "conversational flow" is too vague. Are you running out of things to say? Having a panic attack? Stumbling on your words? Saying inappropriate shit? Staying quiet?
/r/seduction03/03/26 11:56 PM
3

The existence of the OP's skill or lackthereof has no relevance to the process of skill development. Reps done even somewhat correctly in any skill improves said skill. If you AREN'T doing them correctly, then self-correct or find someone who will correct your form.
/r/seduction03/03/26 01:58 PM
1

She could, but he wanted to change the culture expectation for men to lead in general. Basically he's asking for culture to shift so that men take the more submissive, passive, feminine role. Which means women will have to take the more dominant, masculine role. That does not generally end well.
/r/seduction03/03/26 12:26 PM
5

If you want to play the submissive, feminine role in dating, you might be batting for the wrong team.
/r/seduction03/03/26 08:10 AM
1

Get buff, dress well, be confident, and have great social skills and almost every guy can be at least somewhat "hot" or "sexy." Maybe you won't be in people mag's sexiest men issue any time soon, but you'll get a fair number of women who think you're hot or sexy. At least in real life, anyway. Online dating is kind of a dumpster fire at the moment.
/r/seduction03/03/26 08:08 AM
6

lol that's why he said "as your skill level improves"
/r/seduction03/03/26 07:58 AM
-1

You are likely interacting with women who aren't physically attracted to you and expecting that showing direct interest will change how she feels about you. Imagine a woman you find very unattractive (1/10) showing direct interest in you. Does that make you suddenly attracted to her? Probably not. Showing direct interest doesn't automatically guarantee you results in the same way that throwing hail marys in football doesnt automatically guarantee you touchdowns. You are likely making mistakes th…
/r/seduction03/03/26 06:12 AM
1

Look at it from an economics / supply-demand perspective and it will make perfect sense.
/r/seduction03/03/26 06:04 AM
2

It's both factors
/r/seduction03/03/26 06:02 AM
1

Ignore the chatgpt slop. It generates a lot of things that sound good but arent actionable and half of the time arent accurate. It's very good at bullshitting though. What symptoms are you experiencing on a regular basis when you interact with women?
/r/seduction02/03/26 11:30 PM
0

You're going to want specialists who understand autism well because general practitioners are like going to an internal medicine doctor for your brain surgery. They're just not specialized enough and you're likely going to get substandard results from it. You're also going to need to understand that no matter if you work with a coach or not, youre going to need 20-50 interactions per week if you want to make measurable improvements. If you think you have the willpower and drive to push yourself …
/r/seduction02/03/26 02:19 AM
1

This sounds like English but i have no idea what it means. "I can contact without performing" "In contact phase use curiosity in micro questions while dont need sharedness while my non verbal presence is"
/r/seduction02/03/26 02:11 AM
1

A shit test is not random questions or her trying to gather more intel to get a read on you. A shit test is almost always a test for authenticity because you are not seeming like you are who you say you are or who you are purporting yourself to be. So if she's asking for your IG while you're bragging about your millions of followers on social media, then yes, maybe it is a shit test. On the other hand, if she's asking just out of curiosity, it is likely not.
/r/seduction02/03/26 02:07 AM
1

FYI I would not assume something is true just because a lot of people parrot it. My parents' entire generation were convinced that shaving makes hair grow back thicker and faster. Turns out everyone was wrong.
/r/seduction01/03/26 12:54 AM
34

This is a great post on empathy and is something I talk about a lot as a coach. If you really want to emotionally connect well with women, you have to put forth effort to understand what they're going through. Most men don't really understand what it's like to be a woman who is surrounded by men they don't want, which is why men think it must be so easy to be a single woman. It works both ways, though. Women don't understand what it's like to be a guy who has to approach woman and overcome an in…
/r/seduction28/02/26 02:58 AM
1

think of it as a fictional novel that introduces you to the subculture and gets you excited about possibilities. It is NOT a textbook and it is NOT particularly factual. Don't use the techniques in it. They're 25 years old now and very outdated. Imagine using a 25 year old computer or a 25 year old cell phone. It's not that the technology is necessarily bad, it's just obsolete.
/r/seduction27/02/26 08:12 PM
3

When you're autistic, don't look for signals, look for investment. Keep talking, does she stay and talk? Change the subject, does she invest in the conversation? Invite her to join you to grab a smoothie, does she come? Tell her about a sick party you and your friends are throwing. Does she get excited? If you're not sure, invite her and see if she says yes.
/r/seduction27/02/26 03:17 AM
1

Anecdotal evidence isnt a monolith. An oncologist with 40 years of clinical experience is going to have MUCH more reliable anecdotal evidence than a homeless guy who once had a friend who had cancer. Both are anecdotal, both are biased to some extent, but not the same thing at all. We also have to be wary of assuming broad data applies to individual situations and vice versa. Hypothetically, if 50% of attractive women in the world are single, that doesnt mean that 50% of attractive women in the …
/r/seduction26/02/26 08:45 PM
1

assume that you will suck when you start any new sport or skill or activity. That's just how skills work. Ever picked up a basketball and tried to play for the first time? Youre going to suck. Don't expect to be good and dont blame it on your height. Youre going to suck no matter how tall you are at it because basketball (and dating) are SKILLS. Being short in dating is def a disadvantage (just like in basketball), but it doesnt prevent you from improving. Height enhancing insoles will give you …
/r/seduction26/02/26 08:24 PM
3

The stats on female singlehood generally look like a u-shaped curve. Younger women tend to be single and then women in their 30s and 40s tend to skew towards being in a relationship or being married, but then early male deaths and divorce cause the numbers to rise again at 50+ There are no reliable stats on whether attractive women tend to be in relationships more often but it's such a common and easy excuse for guys that anecdotal observations tend to be VERY biased. Sort of like how you always…
/r/seduction26/02/26 08:06 PM
1

The ratio isn't static. It changes over time as you improve and it also changes based on other variables (like how you approach and WHO you approach) In year 0 it's like 0 sex, 1500 approaches. In year 2 it's like 100 approaches to have sex In year 7 it's like 10-20 approaches to have sex In year 14 I did 0 approaches and met my dream girl (the girl in my pfp)
/r/seduction26/02/26 09:05 AM
2

Yup. You don't know who the guy is (he could be a brother, a friend, or just some random), and I can't count the number of times I've approached a woman with a ring on and she admitted that it was either fake or a non wedding ring.
/r/seduction26/02/26 03:32 AM
5

cold approach. And dont try to guess their marital status before you approach. That will just give you excuses.
/r/seduction25/02/26 11:37 PM
4

You clearly arent cold approaching 20-50 women per week. At least half of your approaches will be single women on average if youre cold approaching in a western country. If youre doing this in abu dhabi, i have no idea, maybe things are different.
/r/seduction25/02/26 11:36 PM
6

My 15000 cold approaches and hundreds of dates from cold approach say otherwise
/r/seduction25/02/26 11:32 PM
0

Don't approach right in front of the speakers. Be loud as fuck. Use body language and gestures over words whenever possible. More powerful anyway. If the entire club is so loud that your ears ring whenever you step outside, go to a different club. You are damaging your hearing and are going to be hard of hearing when you hit 35-40. Ask me how i know.
/r/seduction25/02/26 11:31 PM
0

Ideally you want to do both day and night. Think of it like striking vs grappling in fighting. You need both to be well rounded. Night teaches you dominance, leading, confidence, physicality, and flirting. It gives you raw confidence and comfortability with showing interest and touching. Day teaches you calibration, conversation skills, transitioning, humor, subtlety, and more refined charisma. It gives you raw social skills, refinement, and versatility.
/r/seduction25/02/26 11:24 PM
5

depends on where youre approaching and when you get that response. If its stopping a woman on the street in the day time, you're going to get a higher percentage of women saying they have a boyfriend because youre forced to go direct in that context. But if youre getting that response off the opener at night time, that indicates that you made mistakes. Even if she has a bf, she's not generally throwing that out as a first response to your opener outside of direct day game or unless you made mist…
/r/seduction25/02/26 11:19 PM
1

you prefer cold approach instead of bars? I think you need to brush up on your definitions...
/r/seduction25/02/26 11:15 PM
4

Yeah its a good start, man, just work up to 20-50 as soon as you can. "i have a boyfriend" means "you made mistakes" not "youre ugly." This becomes very very apparent when you coach ugly guys who dont change their looks at all but they stop making mistakes and all of a sudden women dont have boyfriends very often anymore.
/r/seduction25/02/26 10:57 PM
36

Aim for 20-50 approaches per WEEK. 5 a month is like doing 5 reps a month in the gym and expecting to get buff. Its not nearly enough volume to move the needle for skill development. I wrote a whole tutorial here on how to emotionally handle "rejection". Feel free to pull it up, i think it will be helpful. You dont have to hit 20 approaches tomorrow, you can work up to it. But generally i have my students try to ramp up to 20 within a month or two of starting. Start with just asking for the time…
/r/seduction25/02/26 10:50 PM
1

Wait did you guys make firm plans that she agreed upon and then asked to reschedule? Or do you mean you asked her out and suggested a time and she asked if you could it a different day? And yes, you arent going to get flaking when you just refuse to accommodate her schedule, because you are essentially proactively flaking on her. It's like when guys preemptively walk away before the girl can "reject them." But that doesn't help in the long run because youre basically just running away any time s…
/r/seduction25/02/26 12:47 AM
7

90% of the time "maintaining frame" comes off weird and disagreeable to people. I would generally avoid it unless you happen to be very timid by nature. Like when a girl says "i know my worth, i set boundaries for myself," do you generally view that as a good thing or bad thing? Usually a bad thing, right? But it's not because those are bad things at all. They're GOOD things. But usually the people who say shit like that are insufferable. The strange thing about this situation is that it appears…
/r/seduction24/02/26 12:47 PM
1

"I’m not sure where this metric about women preferring men five years older than them comes from." I didnt pull that number based on anecdotes from people around me. Anecdotal data is not generally considered reliable when measured against empirical data. The stats vary a bit based on country and age range (as low as 2 years and as high as 14.8 years), but the overall idea of women generally tending to skew towards preferring somewhat older men comes from data like this: The average age gap in r…
/r/ExRedPill21/02/26 01:39 PM
2

Full disclosure, i've never been red pill, but I have coached a TON of guys who got sucked into this ideology. This is a false dichotomy. You are not restricted to only two options: to give up growth or pull away. The better option in a healthy relationship is to talk to her. Open a dialogue. Ask her how she really feels about your new personal development. Ask her what her concerns are and what she might be worried about. She likely doesnt DISLIKE your newfound development, she's just anxious a…
/r/ExRedPill19/02/26 10:30 AM
0

The idea that a guy's best years is 30+ isn't entirely wrong, but its nuanced. Guys develop emotional maturity slower than women so it generally takes us until 30 just to become reasonably emotionally mature adults. Many 27 year old women are fully functioning, respectable adults. But a lot of guys (including me at that age) still kind of seem like kids at 27. A guy's confidence and income generally also improve in his 30s. On top of that, women generally prefer to date a guy 5ish years older th…
/r/ExRedPill19/02/26 10:20 AM
12

There is no way for any of us (including those of us who are professionals) to tell you what the best ROI is because the best ROI is highly dependent on what YOU need specifically. Are you homeless and haven't showered in 6 months? Then showering is by FAR the highest ROI. Do you have crippling depression or social anxiety? Then psychiatry or psychology is the highest ROI. Are you morbidly obese? Then dietician and trainer is highest ROI. See what I mean? There is no single best ROI any more tha…
/r/seduction16/02/26 12:35 PM
2

Thanks dude. I don't have an online course because they honestly don't work for 99% of men. It's like buying a book on swimming or riding a bike and expecting to learn those skills by reading or watching someone else ride a bike.
/r/seduction31/01/26 01:04 AM
2

That's weird cause my 5'4" Asian SO was not my type AT all, yet here we are 8 years later....(I'm the woman in the pfp)
/r/seduction30/01/26 05:45 PM
1

Thanks dude. Game doesn't (fully) change a woman's preference. My SO loves my height because she loves me, but on some evolutionary level she still probably PREFERS 6'2" guys. Before we met she dated male models that were that height so there's definitely a preference there on some level. That said, this doesn't harm our relationship because it's not something that bothers her at all, but if I died one day and I told her to promise me she will find someone again and remarry, she is probably not …
/r/seduction28/01/26 11:54 AM
5

Are you aware of your attachment style? Sounds like you may experience anxious attachment I would recommend the book "love me don't leave me" by Michelle Skeen. It's fantastic and informative, also has workbook style sheets included which really can help you pin poit where everything, like what your experiencing is coming from and how to correct it . Highly recommend.
/r/seduction27/01/26 05:07 PM
31

Meeting my dream girl, knowing I wasn't her type, and then using the skills this journey has given me to make her fall for me anyway, and then realizing that having her as my life partner is 1000x better than even that.
/r/seduction26/01/26 05:20 AM
1

I use it for medical research and troubleshooting computer problems, but dating is my field of expertise so using it for writing about dating is a huge step backwards for me. AI is significantly worse than I am at writing accurately about how to date effectively so it's easy to dismiss it in that context, at least for now. The really scary point is going to be when AI becomes BETTER than the best humans at writing, movies, music, comedy, and social interaction. Overnight, texting is going to bec…
/r/seduction12/01/26 09:37 PM
1

I think it's quickly becoming an acid test to see who knows their shit and who is a blatant fraud. But maybe that's just me being a boomer.
/r/seduction12/01/26 09:16 PM
1

To be fair, I've analyzed wayyyy more than 100+ conversations. But I've also been a full time coach for nearly 2 decades so it makes sense that I would do that. But yeah, I could tell by the title too. One sentence in I skipped to the end to look for the link to whatever he was selling and surprise surprise, there it is.
/r/seduction12/01/26 09:15 PM
1

It's an advertisement to buy his book but he was too lazy to write his own ad so he has AI write it for him. That's why it sounds so hype-y and why he ends with a link to his sales page. He also starts it off making obviously exaggerated claims -- that's the structure of a (slimy) sales pitch.
/r/seduction12/01/26 09:13 PM
1

Yeah seriously. It's bad enough that it's a blatant ad, but it's a lazy, AI-written ad to add insult to injury. If you're going to spam a subreddit at least be willing to write your own spam and not plagiarize it.
/r/seduction12/01/26 09:10 PM
2

Cool quote but not quite accurate. I have an entire career helping guys who focused on money and have a lot of it and zero social skills. So money doesn't hurt you, but exclusively focusing on it and having poor social skills will.
/r/seduction11/01/26 11:05 PM
-2

Found the Australian
/r/seduction11/01/26 11:00 PM
1

What about asking girls to show me their bobs and vagine? Would that work? 😁
/r/seduction11/01/26 10:59 PM
1

If you tip the staff well, the bartenders and staff will make sure you look good in front of dates. It's a plus.
/r/seduction11/01/26 10:58 PM
1

it wont affect you reputation wise as long as youre not doing this repeatedly to women in the same social circle, or in high-risk environments (like at work). If it's cold approach or random women you meet, it wont matter. That said, you dont want to intentionally practice reps with poor form because thats how you create bad habits. Being direct is not a good reason for poor technique/poor form any more than its a good reason for "im direct thats why i take my dick out 2 minutes into a date".
/r/seduction10/01/26 07:53 AM
2

Even if women think exactly the same way as you do (which is probably unlikely), that still leaves 25% of guys for whom she watches their stories and has no interest in them whatsoever. As a general rule, assume that if a woman ghosts or doesnt respond after you've reached out + followed up at least once or twice, they arent interested. And don't start off any conversation by asking them out unless you've already been on multiple dates with them. You're asking for too much investment right off t…
/r/seduction10/01/26 07:29 AM
1

Wait youre asking whats the success rate of a cold approach where they werent looking to meet new people? Why are you looking for that number? That's weirdly specific.
/r/seduction10/01/26 07:18 AM
1

How many women do you approach each week? If it's less than 20, that's the biggest variable to change. 20-50 per week.
/r/seduction10/01/26 07:16 AM
3

Do you want to have sex with every single person whose ig story you look at? Her being with her male friend has nothing to do with exchanging numbers unless by "friend" you mean "her husband." But even if you did exchange numbers, it wouldnt matter, because the underlying issue here is a lack of attraction, so even if you exchanged numbers she likely wouldnt respond on text either.
/r/seduction10/01/26 07:14 AM
3

Bingo, this is the issue. You're assuming women are interested when they are not. If she's interested, she will exchange numbers, not IG, and even if she LOOOOOVES ig and prefers to message there, if she's really into you, she will respond to you. Ignoring you = insufficient attraction.
/r/seduction10/01/26 07:01 AM
2

That would have been hilarious if you were joking, but sadly you were being serious
/r/seduction10/01/26 07:00 AM
2

right, i mean are you meeting them, exchanging ig, then messaging them after they watch your story and immediately asking them out? That only works if you guys had a crazy good connection when you first met, but if you did, she would be texting you, not just watching your stories on ig.
/r/seduction10/01/26 06:54 AM
2

HIGHLY HIGHLY depends on your skill level, assuming you're doing day game. There's also a high variability factor day to day, meaning some days 8 or 9 out of 10 women are in relationships, and other days 8 out of 10 women are into you. A beginner who is shy or awkward will rarely get instadates. Maybe 1 in ~40-50 approaches, sometimes even less, depending on how awkward he is. A beginner who is well adjusted will do closer to 1 in 20-30 approaches Intermediate guy will do ~1 in 10-20 Advanced gu…
/r/seduction10/01/26 06:52 AM
3

Are you just randomly messaging girls who watch your IG story and asking them out? Because that's no different than matching with a girl on tinder and then immediately asking her out. It doesnt work because you have no investment.
/r/seduction10/01/26 06:45 AM
16

To be fair, even in America, high energy game in the day time (like jumping in front of women and being loud and obnoxious) is amateur hour shit. It doesn't work reliably and you come off like a weirdo who is recording a youtube prank video. I think the bigger lesson is to be very wary of copying people on youtube in GENERAL no matter the country, because youtube is like TV -- it's usually entertainment more than it is real life.
/r/seduction10/01/26 06:43 AM
2

If you want women's opinions (especially the average woman and not women self-selected by joining a pickup/seduction subreddit), you might want to ask this question in a women-specific subreddit, not one where it's 99% guys.
/r/seduction10/01/26 06:35 AM
1

This is not true for the vast majority of guys on this sub and on reddit in general, unless you count moving to passport bro locations, but that's not location really, that's leveraging American social status. u/beti88 nailed it -- for most guys who are struggling, it's due to social skills more than anything else. Obviously there are edge cases (e.g., you are in a 500 person town in rural alaska), but for most guys, it's skill, not location.
/r/seduction10/01/26 06:33 AM
1

How many reps do you do (e.g., women you talk to) each week? If it's less than 20, you're doing the equivalent of going to the gym and doing 5 curls and then walking out and wondering why youre not big yet.
/r/seduction09/01/26 01:18 PM
14

This is just fear manifesting as calibration. Give yourself this rule: I will open every time i see a girl to open and the only valid reasons not to approach are: She sees me and tells me to leave her alone The police or security tell me to leave her alone She joins a male companion who immediately holds her hand and/or kisses her Your life or safety are threatened. That means if you have to park your car, get out, and run after her, you do it. If you have to walk into a store to approach her, d…
/r/seduction09/01/26 09:22 AM
8

I hate the term pickup artist but that line about "youre not an excuse artist" was pretty fucking gangster hahaha
/r/seduction09/01/26 09:18 AM
2

It's good advice, and i get that you want people to read your blog, dude, but i swear you link your blog on every single comment and post you write. Maybe keep it to just once in a while?
/r/seduction09/01/26 09:17 AM
2

I think these numbers are decent for a first timer. When I first started, it took me 9ish months (i think?) to sleep with ONE woman and i was approaching 20-30 per week, every week. Can't even complain, it took Tyler 18 months iirc. Granted both of us were starting pretty below avg, even for the time. Your conclusions are correct, though. Almost everyone who puts in work will gradually see results improve over time, which indicates that it's not purely a numbers game, or results would be purely …
/r/seduction08/01/26 03:45 PM
1

1000% you should do this, no matter if youre brand new or a coach. No shame in lowering the weight on the bar if you cant do a sufficient number of reps with good form. Does not mean you suck. All it means is that you're smart and not driven by your ego. One of the old school coaches (even more old school than me) used to say, "no one is above the fundamentals" and I always took that to heart whenever I needed to review the fundamentals again, even at the advanced level.
/r/seduction08/01/26 03:32 PM
2

The correct ratio of reading/theory to practice/implementation is roughly 1:5 or 1:10. For every 1 hour you spend reading you should spend 5-10 practicing.
/r/seduction06/01/26 10:18 PM
2

I wouldn't say this is unethical. Frowned upon by some, yes, but not really unethical.
/r/seduction03/01/26 07:26 AM
9

Hosting events gives you a SLIGHT advantage, it doesn't massively change the dynamics. It's like being 2" taller, or having cooler clothes. Not a game-changer type advantage except in rare circumstances. I'd say being the host of a party (compared to being an attendee) at an avg party gives you around a 10-20% advantage.
/r/seduction03/01/26 07:21 AM
6

Confidence is one of the skills that you ONLY learn by faking it. Its literally the first thing they teach us in USMC boot camp. They immediately make you stand up straight, yell at the top of your lungs, and do everything with purpose. They do this because you learn to be confident not by FEELING confident, but by ACTING confident. So that's the first thing to do. Look at every thing that you do that screams "lack of confidence." Usually it's things like speaking too quietly, uptalk / upward to…
/r/seduction01/01/26 01:09 PM
1

I guarantee this is fixable but only if you are willing to work for it. I've never met a guy who is "impossible" or "hopeless", assuming he's willing to put in the necessary amount of work and will do whatever it takes to fix it. Not having that is the only real caveat that will truly make it impossible.
/r/seduction31/12/25 08:51 PM
1

i mean that ive been coaching long enough where the vast vast majority of situations i can diagnose almost immediately because its super obvious. It's like when a doctor has seen the same broken leg 2000 times and can tell just by looking at it that it's broken and where it's broken. But edge cases like this are complicated because they're rarer, so they basically need a full workup to figure out whats going on. I got your DM, i'll discuss with you offline.
/r/seduction31/12/25 08:47 PM
1

Yeah dude this is a difficult/complicated situation, i would recommend talking to an experienced coach. You're not going to get much from non-professionals (no offense to anyone else here). I've been doing this professionally for almost 20 years and 99% of issues i can see in about 2 seconds, but i would probably need a good 30-60 minutes to diagnose the root cause here.
/r/seduction31/12/25 10:50 AM
1

You've been beaten, humiliated, laughed at, and had the police called on you, all from cold approach?? Dude ive done 15k approaches over 20 years and have never experienced that unless you count a few harsh blowouts as "humiliations." You are DEFINITELY doing something wrong if youre getting all of that from a handful of cold approaches. Ditto for online dating for 9 years with zero matches. I would bet a TON of money i can look at your profile and know what's wrong in about 2 seconds. Feel free…
/r/seduction31/12/25 10:47 AM
2

I coached for one of the first companies in the world to do this in 2007. It did not sell well. We ended up recording pulls instead because no one wanted to watch 2 hours of conversation and emotional connection. The other thing is that even if you had 1000 hours of this, it won't help you any more than watching nba players helps you get good at basketball. Watching someone better than you might help you 1% but actually doing it helps 99%.
/r/seduction31/12/25 05:36 AM
2

Haha I have a student who is 5'2" and Indian with a heavy accent. Makes my dating journey look like a warm up. Guy has balls of steel going up to 6' tall girls in clubs like it's nothing.
/r/seduction29/12/25 07:48 PM
2

You think 5'6" is hard mode. Try being 5'4". You will feel like flying off a skyscraper with a noose around your balls. (Now we better have a 5'2" guy in here who can reply to me lol)
/r/seduction29/12/25 11:02 AM
2

?
/r/seduction29/12/25 05:20 AM
1

Oh, yeah thats 7-14 a week. A bit on the low side for a beginner, but an advanced guy could make that work.
/r/seduction29/12/25 04:59 AM
3

1-2 interactions a week?? I know James Marshall, we've spoke together at the same conventions. That doesn't make sense unless he's referring to advanced guys.
/r/seduction29/12/25 04:44 AM
3

This is the right answer.
/r/seduction29/12/25 04:01 AM
2

Yeah 50-150 is excessive. Its great if you can do it, but you don't need that much to make improvements. General consensus from all of us who have been coaching a long time is roughly 20-50 per week.
/r/seduction29/12/25 04:00 AM
1

The problem isnt lack of sexuality (do NOT think you can fix this by talking about sex), it's lack of attraction and lack of sexual tension. If she isnt laughing a LOT on the date, you dont have sufficient attraction and its likely not going anywhere. Focus on that first. Don't put the cart before the horse.
/r/seduction25/12/25 10:26 PM
12

Asian/South Asian men were considered unattractive in America WAY before blackpill was ever around. And this is almost exclusively a black pill thing. The broader "manosphere" (red pill, MGTOW, men's rights, pickup/"alpha male" douchebags) doesn't really concern themselves with race. But to answer your question, google says that incels often adopt elements of white supremacy because their core worldview is about rigid hierarchies and grievance, and contemporary white supremacist ideology offers …
/r/ExRedPill25/12/25 10:59 AM
5

Numbers arent particularly useful because theyre so specific to individual situations. A 6'4" NBA player talking to his fans is going to have WILDLY different numbers to a 5'2" indian guy with autism who is talking to blondes in hollywood nightclubs. Your social skills and who and how youre approaching matter WAY more to cold approach stats than anything else, so its too hard to predict what you should expect. That said, here's a general idea for your rough situation based on 20 years of coachin…
/r/seduction25/12/25 12:28 AM
1

I only got about a quarter of the way through the article when i stopped reading because it's a garbage take. The crux of the article is this philosophy: "Genuine niceness is when you do things for a person out of gratitude because they did something to deserve it." That's not genuine niceness. That's obligatory reciprocation ("fine, you did me a favor, i guess i should do one for you too.") It is a jaded, bitter, reactive philosophy based on scarcity and paranoia that everyone is out to get you…
/r/seduction21/12/25 12:25 PM
1

Wait if you do fine in larger metro areas, why not just go exclusively there? But then at the end you said it's been hard to connect with people in general, so that seems to contradict the whole thing about youre successful in larger metros areas.
/r/seduction21/12/25 12:01 PM
3

I'm going to be brutally honest with you, man, because that's what i think you need right now: You're not advanced. You might have the same number of reps as an advanced guy, but you're a beginner in terms of skill. If this were fitness, imagine you've gone to the gym for 12 years but you still can't do a pushup or a pull up. In that case, number of years matters less than the fact that you haven't progressed out of the beginner skill levels yet. I dont say this to put you down. I admire your te…
/r/seduction21/12/25 03:17 AM
1

Depends on how long it's been. People usually respond in 24-48 hours at most. If she doesn't, then you know there isn't enough interest. Watch how she reacts next time you see her at the gym. If shes all smiles, then she probably either didn't see it or didn't know who you were, or just forgot. If she avoids you, she isn't interested and wants to avoid the awkwardness.
/r/seduction21/12/25 02:28 AM
1

You guys stood there in the gym and had a 30 min conversation? You neglected to mention that key data point. Even still, if she wasnt showing a lot of interest I wouldn't start a text conversation with an invite. Its unnecessarily sloppy and hail maryish. You could just as easily say something funny, she laughs and reciprocates, you guys go back and forth a few times, then you invite to something once youve confirmed you have investment.
/r/seduction21/12/25 02:21 AM
2

you are correct, you dont want to ask her out on the first message. That's amateur hour shit. Don't ask for the sale until you already know the customer wants the product. Otherwise you're just throwing out hail marys.
/r/seduction21/12/25 01:03 AM
1

Neediness is not WHAT you do, it's WHY you do it.
/r/seduction19/12/25 03:22 AM
2

Dude you gotta run the math before you claim numbers like this. Esp in a sub full of Asians. 5.5 hours is only 330 minutes. If you did 2 instadates (which generally take minimum 30 minutes each to walk to a new place and then sit down and talk), you just shaved off an hour. So now it's 4.5 hours, or 270 minutes. You did 200 approaches in 270 minutes? That means on average each interaction you did could not last more than about 1 minute, 20 seconds, and that's assume that there is 0 seconds betwe…
/r/seduction10/12/25 06:56 AM
3

I agree with what your saying but he didnt say he was going out to get numbers. He said he was going out to alleviate his approach anxiety. And for THAT reason, i agree that large quantities of approaches is the right move.
/r/seduction10/12/25 06:49 AM
1

Is Ireland vastly different or something? The closest I've come is London and I did fine there.
/r/seduction10/12/25 06:31 AM
1

tall, white, and handsome you say? Why thank you kind sir. Unfortunately I'm short, Asian, and funny looking but i appreciate the positivity!
/r/seduction10/12/25 06:30 AM
4

best hobby is cold approaching
/r/seduction09/12/25 07:25 AM
28

Damn I was reading this, hoping you guys wouldn't fall for this bullshit but you guys in the comments really understood the assignment. Glad to see people call this out for the horseshit that it is. Misogynistic, bitter, angry, and then using low effort, AI slop as the icing on the cake. But hey, at least he removed the em dashes to try to disguise it lmao
/r/seduction09/12/25 05:58 AM
8

Flirtiness is much more effective when it's witty and contextual, which means not pre-scripted lines or questions. That said, here are some examples of in-context flirting so you can see how the structure and patterns work: Her: I just bought an 85" tv and it's amazing You: Ahh size queen... we will get along. ...I also like large TVs Her: I do a lot of cardio You: Is this your way of telling me you have a lot of stamina? Her: I just got my nails done and I chipped them already You: I mean you c…
/r/seduction09/12/25 02:59 AM
1

Youre getting the causality wrong. Its not that waiting 3 days CAUSES her to like you. It's that youre taking longer because she's LESS ATTRACTIVE, and less attractive women are going to invest more. So the variable thats making the difference here is that you're relatively LESS attractive to hotter girls and relatively MORE attractive to less-hot girls. THATS whats causing this to happen. The secondary variable here is that if your too excited about the more attractive women, youre going to be …
/r/seduction09/12/25 12:07 AM
2

This is real shit. Same situation. Never realized that after learning how to get women, i would then be entering the "2nd quest" where i had to start all over again, learning how to keep them and have healthy relationships.
/r/seduction08/12/25 07:13 AM
2

Hey brother, Went through exactly the same thing. For years, women who got close to me or knew me well said I seemed "dead inside." I was a pretty shitty boyfriend (emotionally) to a lot of women because I couldn't open up and I was constantly pushing them away. It's a natural part of the coping strategies that allow us to withstand thousands and thousands of rejections and keep coming back. Here's the good news: It comes back again if you work on it and don't give up. The more time I spent real…
/r/seduction08/12/25 07:11 AM
3

i dont know if these exist anymore, but they used to be called "lairs" (dorky, i know) back in the day. They were a very critical component in my success
/r/seduction07/12/25 03:11 AM
6

By definition, this is not a cold approach (this is a warm approach), so its irrelevant to the OP's question.
/r/seduction07/12/25 03:08 AM
1

The problem is, even if there is evidence, if people don't want to believe it, they won't. My SO has gone on record saying she wasnt attracted to me at all when we first met, but her feelings for me changed once we interacted. Most of my ex's said the same thing. But guys don't want to believe that it exists, so they just say that she must be lying. So if someone posts video doing it, it's going to be SO easy to just say "oh that video was faked" No amount of evidence will convince someone who d…
/r/seduction06/12/25 11:54 PM
1

Yeah man, the highest probability sets are always going to be the receptive ones, but that's fairly obvious when you think about it. Turning around difficult or hostile sets is like trying to sell yellow snow to an eskimo. Very, very difficult and often not worth it to most people when there are easier fish in the sea. However, if you're an eskimo with ONLY yellow snow (like me), then you better learn how to do it, or youre going to be celibate. We do a drill in boot camps where a girl acts supe…
/r/seduction06/12/25 11:21 PM
2

You pay girls to act receptive, not to act bitchy. :D Only half kidding. SO MANY infield videos are faked though. A lot of them are really obvious once you've filmed videos professionally. Even with genuine infield videos though, there are 3 main reasons why you see a lot of receptivity: Succeeding with nonreceptive sets is one of the most difficult things to do, so even at the coach level, it's still relatively rare compared to receptive sets. Nonreceptive sets are boring af to watch. Almost 20…
/r/seduction06/12/25 10:52 PM
3

He's not an employee or associate of mine. I dont know him outside of this sub so he has no incentive to "run defense". It's not that weird for some people to agree with a comment you make on reddit
/r/seduction06/12/25 01:51 PM
4

Not sure about how the new coaches are, but the irony here is that the old school guys (like me) considered warm approaches (where a girl gives you IOIs) as "freebies that don't count" because girls who were already into you were not an illustration of skill, they were scenarios where you happened to get lucky. Sort of like how pro pool players think that if you sink a shot unintentionally (without calling it), it doesn't count because it was pure luck.
/r/seduction06/12/25 01:26 PM
6

If you walk up and she straight up ignores you and pretends you didn't say anything, thats not usually just "youre not her type." That's usually youre being timid af. You could ALSO not be her type (both things can be true), but the main variable here is being timid. How do we know this? Because I've coached thousands of students and here's what I've seen over 20 years of coaching: Good looking guys who are timid and quiet still FREQUENTLY get ignored. But non-timid, assertive ugly guys ALMOST N…
/r/seduction06/12/25 12:43 PM
3

Not disagreeing at all. I was clarifying my stance after you said "i disagree"
/r/seduction06/12/25 12:25 PM
4

The tactic you want to use here heavily, heavily depends on your context. You are going to address this VERY differently if the guy is a coworker vs if the guy is your boss, vs if the guy is the bartender. Each context (along with what's being said) requires a different answer. If you can give more specifics (who is the guy, what is he saying, what is the environment, etc), i can give you more specifics of how you should handle it.
/r/seduction06/12/25 12:07 PM
6

This is why i said: "if youre new and not naturally talented or demographically disadvantaged." OP mentioned "rejections," which is ambiguous. Could mean she ignored his approach altogether (he's too quiet, timid, or making massive mistakes on his approach) or it could mean they have a 5-10 minute conversation but she doesnt want to instadate (insufficient attraction and/or connection). Both of these situations are considered "rejections" but they have very different diagnoses. I'm 5'4" and asia…
/r/seduction06/12/25 11:32 AM
64

Expect 90-100% blow outs for the first several HUNDRED approaches if youre new and not naturally talented or demographically disadvantaged. Cold approach is one of the most difficult social things to do in the world, and youre doing it as a brand new guy, with potentially no natural advantages. Youre going to get blow outs. A lot of them. It's part of the process, and frankly, its a good thing because it prevents most guys from ever becoming your competition because the barrier to entry is so hi…
/r/seduction06/12/25 10:45 AM
2

Yup, this one. Very very useful. I took some when I was a student. Improv and public speaking classes are useful too.
/r/seduction06/12/25 10:26 AM
5

The problem with the concept of a DHV (speaking as someone who taught Mystery's style of DHVs for YEARS in the early 2000s), is that it always presupposes that you are a loser and have to prove yourself to women. It inherently comes from a place of inferiority and the disadvantages of that mindset almost always supersedes any advantage that it can give you by impressing others. I first figured out this issue with DHVs by hanging out with naturals and powerful, wealthy guys. They never seemed to …
/r/seduction04/12/25 05:54 AM
2

FYI the main sticking point in scenarios like this is almost always not creating sufficient attraction, not an issue with flirting.
/r/seduction02/12/25 11:49 AM
1

cocaine is also a push start for a night of shitty sleep, but that doesnt mean it's a good idea.
/r/seduction28/11/25 12:08 AM
2

Are you trying to make them laugh to connect, or are you trying to dance around the idea that you dont like that she's late?
/r/seduction27/11/25 07:41 AM
25

The pushback isnt because everyone is a radical feminist. It's because OP sounds like a 14 year old edgelord.
/r/seduction27/11/25 07:35 AM
33

I would caution you against deriving your self esteem from other people's reactions and validation. That's a quick way to develop fragile self esteem
/r/seduction27/11/25 04:50 AM
2

Yeah I remember this point in my journey vividly. Volume of reps, experience, gradual improvement, cognitive reframing, and coaching/therapy are how i got over it.
/r/seduction25/11/25 12:00 AM
3

Slut shaming, looking down on women for their body count, "she's for the streets," bullshit like that. Shitting on women because they have sex.
/r/seduction24/11/25 10:49 AM
3

I think we all like women who make it easy. But depending on what you're working with, that isnt a luxury we all have. I'm a 5'4" asian guy who isnt particularly good looking. I play this game on one mode: HARD MODE. You don't get girls who just swoon over you at first glance from across the bar when playing on hard mode. It doesn't mean I will run around chasing after a woman until she throws a drink in my face. But I don't give up at the first sign of difficulty, either. Many women arent playi…
/r/seduction24/11/25 10:45 AM
3

"Nobody, I repeat nobody, with the skill to successfully cold approach ever thinks online dating is better. It just never happens. That should be your sign right there." 100% facts
/r/seduction24/11/25 10:33 AM
2

I'm late to the party here but this is probably the best post of this entire thread, and is EXACTLY what my attitude was like in the early 2000s. I was just happy I could walk up and talk to a girl, even if she blew me out 2 seconds later. Every little tiny accomplishment was a win, and those wins helped me come back, day after day. And that eventually turned into creating a sex life I didn't think was possible, which eventually turned into finding the love of my life and soulmate. And none of t…
/r/seduction24/11/25 10:30 AM
1

No idea if LA might make a comeback, but everyone seems to be moving to other cities so it doesnt look great. Almost all of my friends moved out of LA because of the crime going up, the fires, the taxes, etc. Maybe california/LA will get its act together in the future and people will move back. Not holding my breath though. The OG guys moved all over, but we're all mostly in our 40s and 50s now, so many of us have families and stuff and want to raise kids in a better location. I honestly dont ev…
/r/seduction24/11/25 10:21 AM
2

He's saying that most "rejections" are soft rejections, which means the girl isnt overtly saying 'get the fuck away from me.' Those are called "hard blow outs" and you leave when you get those. But soft blowouts, like when the girl is talking to you but isnt investing a lot, or is kind of ignoring you somewhat... that's when most guys give up. But you can sometimes turn those sets around, and it's worth pushing them to show yourself that it's possible, and to develop a resistance to social press…
/r/seduction24/11/25 10:09 AM
3

We've been over this before. I can't speak for Julien as I've never met him. But I've had TONS of interactions where the girl wasn't attracted to me on first approach but I still ended up with her. Doesn't mean i dont ever get blown out, but to say that you can't create attraction when it isn't there on the approach is not true. My SO is literally proof of this. I get it, you don't believe me, you think i must be lying. That's okay, you don't have to believe me. But that doesn't mean it isn't tr…
/r/seduction24/11/25 10:06 AM
3

For years in the early 2000s I was die hard LA in spite of spending a lot of time coaching in NYC, because the winters are unbearable in NY and the summers are so humid i wanted to kill myself every time i stepped outside. The women are also more attractive PER CAPITA in LA (esp towards WeHo and West LA). But NYC has more attractive women PER SQUARE MILE because of the population density. But to be honest, a big draw for LA during that time frame was because LA was the mecca of pickup back then.…
/r/seduction24/11/25 05:11 AM
22

RSD was famous for posting their blowouts. Compilations of blowouts, sometimes. Blowouts are part of the game. It's like getting bad hands in poker. Unavoidable unless youre cheating.
/r/seduction24/11/25 03:28 AM
7

As someone who people would refer to as a "guru" (though i find that term cringe af), i can tell you definitively that gurus still get "rejected" a lot if they're genuinely approaching attractive sets "cold" (e.g., not filtering for sets which look approachable). Note that when i say "rejected" i dont mean women throw a drink in their face. It usually just looks like you interact with a woman and it doesn't turn into anything. Don't believe any "guru" who claims to be battling 1.0. He's lying to…
/r/seduction24/11/25 03:27 AM
49

u/Virtual_Ad_4817: "I won't say who they are." u/wlee25: "who are they?" lol
/r/seduction24/11/25 03:16 AM
6

You may want to brush up on your reading comprehension
/r/ExRedPill23/11/25 11:45 PM
8

Intrinsically youre good enough. Extrinsically, you dont have the beliefs, confidence, self-esteem, and social skills to date effectively. We've seen that with your previous posts saying you want to date but you dont want to work on yourself. You got downvoted to oblivion by the entire other thread because all you did was tell people you dont want to put in any work, you just deserve women's affection by existing. Dating is a privilege, not a right.
/r/ExRedPill23/11/25 11:44 PM
4

Negative, ghostrider. Here's what i said in the other thread when you said you didnt want to work on yourself, you just wanted women to magically like you with no effort on your part: "You've gone 30 years with no dates, no sex, and no partners, and youre expecting that to suddenly change without any effort or intervention on your part?"
/r/ExRedPill23/11/25 11:40 PM
2

One thing to note here: Pickup artists and red pill are NOT the same thing. They are loosely related, yes, but so are muslims and the taliban. Doesnt make them the same. Pickup artists and redpill (and blackpill) have very very different central ideologies, even if they have certain things in common (like approaching women). Here's the difference in ideology (generally speaking, there are always going to be exceptions) Pickup artists: Its your fault youre single, unfuck yourself and fix your shi…
/r/ExRedPill23/11/25 11:37 PM
10

Red pill is not wrong about everything. Neither is the KKK, the Nazi party, flat earthers, or any other kooky ideology. Theyre just wrong about MOST things, and they try to cherry pick data points to twist them around to fit their narrative. For example, the modern day KKK believes that the US constitution guarantees free speech. Which is correct. But you wouldn't say, "oh well see, they're right about that, so let's also buy into this genocide thing" Yes, women in GENERAL (regardless of weight)…
/r/ExRedPill23/11/25 11:32 PM
2

Do we tell young kids in the ghetto: "you statistically will never get out of the ghetto and will die of gang violence before you're 18" or do we tell them: "you can be anything you set your mind to?" There's a reason we default to #2 even though its technically a "denial of reality"
/r/seduction23/11/25 11:05 PM
2

For me personally, tone is calibrated based on context or situation, but it tends to skew more towards playful/humor in most contexts. So I mostly used the Chameleon setting on your app. Specific scenarios that it could do better on: * Less predictable open-ended AI-style questions ("so, what's one thing that XYZ?") * Sometimes all of the options dont really make sense in context. * It seems to struggle with highly playful banter where you have to come up with something funny and the margin of e…
/r/seduction23/11/25 12:42 PM
2

Ok so I'm a former software engineer turned dating coach in the early 2000s so my feedback is coming from that context. Here's what I see: * UI/UX is very slick. Impressive looking for sure. Not sure if you vibe coded this or paid someone to do it or you did it yourself, but it's a very impressive looking UI for an MVP. * The analysis of the screenshots are pretty decent. Fairly accurate, all considering. * It's a pretty impressive technical proof of concept, and might be viable from a product s…
/r/seduction23/11/25 11:55 AM
4

Honest question: are you actually looking for feedback or more just promoting your app?
/r/seduction23/11/25 11:19 AM
6

Like most absolutes, some of this is true and some is not. What's true: * 80-90% of INITIAL ATTRACTION is based off of face, height, frame, and voice. I would argue that the notable exception is FAME AND STATUS which conceivably could make up the 10-20% not included in your stat. This is why DJs and bartenders get laid a lot even if they aren't attractive. * Initial attraction is mostly physical. If we're talking about first, gut-level impression in the first second, then yes, that's mostly phys…
/r/seduction23/11/25 11:06 AM
3

Yeah that makes sense. Mark and I were dating coaching colleagues in the late 2000s and early 2010s and we had similar paths and mentors. We used to guest coach at each other's boot camps. Good guy and fantastic writer.
/r/seduction23/11/25 10:19 AM
1

I assume you mean Krauser? And youre going to need to be a bit more specific. He did WHAT at 30 something?
/r/seduction23/11/25 08:03 AM
1

You are correct from the context of pure efficacy in a cold approach. HOWEVER, I would argue: Is the goal for most guys to do what is most effective to start a conversation with a woman... or is the goal to build the necessary skills to attract women? If the goal is to build skills, then often times situational is NOT the optimal way to open. Because it's easy, yes, but not necessarily the optimal opener for skill development.
/r/seduction23/11/25 06:54 AM
53

Guys, being sex positive doesnt automatically get you out of the friend zone. Thats not what he's saying. He's saying that being openly sex positive (e.g., not judging women for their sexuality) makes women much more open to having sex with you, because theyre not afraid youre going to judge them for it. This is a correct observation. But it doesnt negate the requirement to either have attraction or build it.
/r/seduction23/11/25 06:51 AM
1

lol its played out, but i still laughed
/r/seduction23/11/25 06:48 AM
2

"Despite there being no differences in IQ or general intelligence between males and females, men often overestimate their IQs, considering them to be higher than females." -Neuroscience News, March 2022
/r/seduction23/11/25 06:46 AM
11

Full transparency: I'm a coach and I've been a coach for a very long time, so take this for what it's worth. Your overall analysis is spot on, and is exactly the same conclusion I came to when I was a student and struggling. Over the years I've found that there are 3 main ways guys get good at this (who aren't naturally talented): #1. They trial-and-error it. This involves tens of thousands of cold approaches and interactions and figuring things out gradually by seeing what works and what doesn'…
/r/seduction23/11/25 06:43 AM
9

When I was a student (in the early 2000s) there were also a ton of charlatans out there. But I did my research before working with a coach, and it paid off. I still got screwed once or twice by shitty coaches I didn't see coming, but overall I improved to the point where I got the dating life I wanted, the abundance and confidence I wanted, and ultimately the dream girl I always wanted. This is sort of like finding a good doctor, a good personal trainer, a good therapist, a good stem cell treatm…
/r/seduction23/11/25 06:23 AM
1

Game is not just cold approach, man. Cold approach is just one manifestation of how game works. Youre not getting results because youre deficient in one of the following areas: Game/charisma/social skills Confidence/Self-esteem/Belief systems Lack of volume or interactions with women (which usually is due to #2) Neurodivergent or similar disorders Combination of the above At this point you're probably going to need professional help. And theres nothing wrong with that. But it's unrealistic to th…
/r/seduction23/11/25 06:15 AM
2

These numbers dont really matter and here's why: I can make this 1:2 for phone numbers and 1:3 for dates if I pick women who are less attractive or show interest pre-approach. But I can make it 1:20 or worse if I intentionally pick sets that I know are tough. The numbers only matter if you ensure that certain variables remain constant. Otherwise you're just playing with the numbers to get the outcome that you are looking to get.
/r/seduction23/11/25 05:08 AM
23

You probably want to work on learning not to judge women for their sexuality. It's common, but it hurts you, it hurts your dating life (because why would she want to sleep with a guy who judges her), and it hurts your relationships. It's fine if you want a relationship or want to date exclusively, but there's a pretty strong insinuation that you get a sense of disgust from women who are sleeping with different guys, even though that's what most of us are doing. Your question implies that youre s…
/r/seduction22/11/25 03:51 AM
6

I'm 5'4". Went from chonk to abs. Made very very little difference tactically when cold approaching (though keep in mind I was already a coach so skill level was relatively high), but good for self-image, how you feel, online dating (because low bodyfat makes face more attractive), and overall health. That said, if you start out super short AND super scrawny and go from that to ripped, you will likely see a more dramatic change because youre going from a feeling of "girls can beat me up" to "i l…
/r/seduction22/11/25 01:56 AM
2

AFC hahahahahahah. God damn, that nostalgia hit.
/r/seduction21/11/25 09:09 AM
2

Dave and busters is too pricey? Just get a drink and like $20 of arcade credits. What's your date budget? Also, have you slept together? Because if not, you should be focused on logistics, not things to do.
/r/seduction21/11/25 08:54 AM
-1

Confidence doesn't ONLY come with positive reinforcement. Confidence comes more from doing hard shit, overcoming obstacles, and getting out of your comfort zone. If you continue to blame other people for your lack of confidence, you'll never acquire it.
/r/seduction21/11/25 08:03 AM
1

Dude i am so confused. Where does OP say that morals = success with women? Are you guys all responding to something the OP edited out of his post or something? All i see is OP saying dont be a dick and be confident. Thats not morality, thats tactical advice that makes you effective with women. "Morals = success" would be "dont steal, always tell the truth, be kind to people, and you'll always get the girl"
/r/seduction21/11/25 08:01 AM
-6

Being effective with women due to your confidence is not the just world fallacy. What are you talking about? Confidence is not being a good person, it's a belief in yourself that has been something women have found attractive since the dawn of time.
/r/seduction20/11/25 02:13 PM
8

Too much tiktok, too much incel/blackpill shit, and too much online dating where girls creates insane criteria in order to get the available pool down to a manageable number. Same way you try to make decisions when you have too many options. You start getting really really stringent about random variables just to narrow the pool down. Edit: Also, the average guy IS struggling right now, but not because of his height. It's because dating inequality is insanely high (mostly due to online dating), …
/r/seduction20/11/25 09:29 AM
1

Dude youve posted the same reply to several of my comments which are not relevant at all to the discussion. What's going on? Are you trying to troll or something?
/r/seduction20/11/25 01:16 AM
1

Social / dating skill. Charisma. Likeability. je ne sais quoi. Knowing exactly what to say and do, and when and how to say or do it.
/r/seduction19/11/25 11:39 PM
2

A good portion of my students are on the spectrum (and my coaching staff, including me, are mostly ND too) so we know ASD well. If you have the hyperfixation part of ASD, use it to your advantage. Make social skills and game your hyperfixation. You'll want to make sure you're aware of each ASD symptom you have (especially ones that cause you difficulty in dating) and work on systematically fixing or masking each one to make you more effective. So volume, for example. Maybe you're too loud at tim…
/r/seduction18/11/25 08:29 PM
1

Game is not about finding women who align with you. That's not game. That's looking for compatible women. Important, but completely separate. Game is about improving yourself and making yourself more attractive to fix the difficulties youre having with dating.
/r/seduction18/11/25 07:58 PM
1

Technically, rape is the most effective way to sleep with a lot of girls. But that doesnt mean its a good idea. You dont need to lead women on (or rape) if your skill is decent. What's probably happening here is that you're thinking in black and white: "I either tell her im looking for a relationship in order to sleep with her, or i tell her im just a fuckboy who wants her vagina and doesnt give a fuck about her" Even women who are down for more casual relationships still want you to be tactful …
/r/seduction18/11/25 07:52 PM
1

This is the same thing as "grappling or striking"? You need both to be effective. Learn direct first if you're lacking confidence or dominance. Learn indirect first if you're lacking social calibration or are operating in environments that are less risk-tolerant.
/r/seduction18/11/25 07:45 PM
8

Good principles, OP, but it would be more helpful to show guys HOW to do them versus just telling them about the concepts. Most of those concepts are fairly well understood in this sub. The HOW TO is the difficult part.
/r/seduction18/11/25 07:41 PM
6

thats not game. Thats being good looking.
/r/seduction18/11/25 07:40 PM
1

Never really kept track because I realized early on that its a worthless metric. You can massively alter the ratio by simply picking warm, easy, or ugly sets. But those sets don't make you better. It's like sparring with only white belts to keep your win ratio up in MMA. Yes, your win ratio will be great, but that's because youre picking on white belts. Also, the ratio massively changes over time. Because in the first year it's like 1500:1 but then once you're more advanced its maybe 10:1 or 5:1…
/r/seduction18/11/25 05:38 AM
7

Chatgpt is AWFUL at flirting. AWFUL. It might be good at other disciples but in its current iteratio with flirting, it will make you worse, not better.
/r/seduction18/11/25 01:47 AM
1

Unless youre in a VERY small town or area, no one cares. I cant count the number of times Ive approached the same woman more than once, or a woman who knew someone else I approached. It's bound to happen when you do 15,000 approaches. It's never caused long term problems. But I've also never cold approached in a 20,000 person town, either, so take that with a grain of salt if that's where you're at.
/r/seduction17/11/25 11:57 AM
1

This doesnt appear to be AI at all. It has none of the tell tale signs of AI -- vocabulary, sentence structure, em-dashes, etc.
/r/seduction17/11/25 02:27 AM
27

Stop making it about the outcome (getting a number, getting her to like you) focus on skill development. What did you you do better this time? Maybe it was tone , volume at approach etc. Youre not gonna keep positivity being outcome dependent, that burns out real fast.
/r/seduction15/11/25 05:46 PM
1

Youre looking for a magic pill, man. It doesnt exist. There is no one magic topic that you can pull out of nowhere that is amazing and immediately improves the conversation when youve made mistakes. It doesnt exist in ANY skill: "Whats a technique i can learn in 2 minutes that allows me to defeat a UFC fighter in a fight?" "whats a jump shot technique i can use to outscore a good basketball player if im not good at basketball?" "Whats a technique i can use as a newbie chess player that will inst…
/r/seduction14/11/25 11:43 PM
2

Do not ask a girl out randomly / out of the blue unless you know investment is high. Instead, in conversation bring up something fun you've been doing lately and see if she bites. If she does, tell her you'll take her sometime. If she wants to go out, she'll jump on the invite. If not, you haven't made it weird and you can continue the conversation normally. If you did ask her out and she hesitated, don't randomly change the subject because its going to be awkward. Roll with the conversation int…
/r/seduction14/11/25 12:34 PM
1

Are you referring to text or in person? Because the techniques are slightly different
/r/seduction14/11/25 07:23 AM
1

You should probably read the thread again.
/r/seduction14/11/25 03:58 AM
4

Unlikely to be character. It's almost always behavior-based, especially if this is a common enough issue where it's not just coincidence anymore (e.g., you've gotten this 10+ times in a row). Unfortunately there's only 2 ways to know for sure: Ask a girl the next time this happens and ask her as a big favor to you. Let he know that this is coming up a lot and you would just like some brutal honesty and that you wont get upset at her. She might not tell you, but some women will. You're looking fo…
/r/seduction13/11/25 11:37 AM
1

Dude you almost had me there. I got about halfway through that comment before I realized you were fucking with me. Bravo.
/r/seduction13/11/25 11:19 AM
1

lol @ "he drove a freaking chevy." Better than a Ford.
/r/seduction13/11/25 10:53 AM
1

First 3? Are you following some sort of strategy to ask the girl 3 questions in a row or something? I don't generally ask very many questions during an approach or initial stages of an interaction. Once in a while, but not a ton, because my objective is to behave like we're already people who know each other, and people who know each other tend to make more statements than ask questions. The next time you're with friends, pay attention to the number of statements you make vs the number of questi…
/r/seduction13/11/25 10:52 AM
2

Very good point. Though every i-banker i know also works like a billion hours too and wants to kill himself by the time he's 35.
/r/seduction12/11/25 11:08 PM
2

Yeah i agree. Like i said, its dumb. You're just buying attraction, which is getting really close to sugaring.
/r/seduction12/11/25 11:06 PM
3

Dating Skill / Social skill / Game / Charisma. The entire point of this sub.
/r/seduction12/11/25 04:17 PM
8

How creative. Maybe you should use chatgpt more for your responses and less for your posts lol.
/r/seduction12/11/25 02:56 PM
11

At LEAST remove the obvious overused emojis dude. Like at least TRY to make it look like you wrote it
/r/seduction12/11/25 02:50 PM
19

Ahh so we meet again, chatgpt
/r/seduction12/11/25 02:45 PM
9

You should 100% leave if she asks you to leave or says she's not interested and wants to be left alone. But leaving immediately as soon as a girl isnt showing you obvious signs of interest is misguided as it robs you of the ability to withstand social pressure and it creates a bad habit of running around looking for girls who like you vs actually using skill to create attraction. Running around finding girls who are into you isnt skill-based game. It's a numbers game / spam approach game. It's l…
/r/seduction12/11/25 02:43 PM
3

sorry, not ALL women, just "women in general," based on your sample size of 1.
/r/seduction12/11/25 02:10 PM
34

Wait you have one female friend who MIGHT be a gold digger so now youre disappointed in 3.5 billion women?
/r/seduction12/11/25 01:26 PM
1

We used to call this "stacking weird (and shitty) mini-cold reads" It's weird. Don't do it. Also tells me you're reading a lot of random ass pickup shit online, most of which is garbage. Be very careful of what you read and follow, because 90% of the advice (even on this sub) will make you worse. When you read the wrong shit thinking it's good advice, this is what you end up doing. u/norwegiandoggo gave a great breakdown of how to fix this. Follow it.
/r/seduction12/11/25 12:25 PM
4

I think you missed the prompt, man. The prompt wasn't whether it was possible to get an attractive women without 800 grand. Of course it is, I don't make that kind of money, and I do fine. (Though I do have clients and friends who make more than that, which is why I know that that's the point at which money starts to matter in dating -- i've seen it firsthand.) The prompt was How do you attract VERY attractive women (generally defined as 9+ in places like NYC) WITH MONEY ONLY. As in, no personal…
/r/seduction12/11/25 12:13 PM
4

Hunter, dont ever game in Berkeley, CA. You will jump off a bridge lmao
/r/seduction12/11/25 11:29 AM
9

The real world is not the internet. The extremist radical feminists who scream "rape culture!" every time a guy comes up and says hello to her (the ones you're talking about) are actually fairly rare in the real world unless you live in Berkeley, CA or something. If every 2nd girl was like this in real life, cold approach would be a massive liability and would never work. Fortunately, thats not the case.
/r/seduction12/11/25 11:03 AM
3

Breakdown of Budget Dates and Gifts-for-Her Budget: $4k/mo (consider that a single dinner at a michelin star restaurant often runs $1000 for 2 people) Housing Costs in LA/NYC: $20k/mo for a mortgage on a 2-2.5mm (mm = million), nice-but-not-luxurious house/condo, including utilities, maintenance, insurance, taxes, etc. Probably around 2500-3000 sqft, 3-4 bedrooms. Not a mansion by any means. Car: ~$2000/mo (BMW M3 + gas + insurance + maintenance). Not even in supercar territory yet. Food: $1500/…
/r/seduction12/11/25 11:00 AM
1

"Mid to low 6 figures" ain't shit in a high cost of living city and when trying to date attractive women with money and not much else. (obviously if youre tall, famous, and stupid good looking, you dont need much money at ALL to date attractive women) Many of my students and clients make that much and more, and they definitely do not feel wealthy and they definitely dont have enough money to date attractive women, even if they were okay with flaunting it. Let's do some math on what it would cost…
/r/seduction12/11/25 10:59 AM
0

Oh damn, well it was a good guess. But yeah, youre right that its almost always possible to negate a relatively advantage.
/r/seduction12/11/25 09:36 AM
5

I'm going to guess I know what ethnicity you are. I'm also going to guess you know who salman rushdie is, and what he looks like. And his model ex-wife Padma Lakshmi. He was a 56 year old fat, ugly guy. He didn't get her from his looks. Or his muscles. He got her because of status. If you dont know who these people are, google them. If you're the ethnicity I think you are, you probably also know a lot of doctors who arent particularly attractive who are married to relatively attractive women. It…
/r/seduction12/11/25 09:25 AM
8

"Game" is a composite skill set which allows you to date women out of your league or women you wouldn't otherwise be able to date under normal circumstances. Generally this means women who are more attractive than you. It is NOT just finding women who already like you and not screwing it up. Thats more just filtering and requires relatively little skill. Game is comprised of individual skills like social skills, humor, calibration, reading social cues, flirting, emotional connection, escalation …
/r/seduction12/11/25 05:52 AM
5

So keep in mind that my experience might be unique because I'm 5'4" and Asian and almost every woman I've ever hooked up with wasn't really attracted to me right off the bat, with the exception of women who were really into my look back in the day (I used to go to clubs with a 12" mohawk and a very edgy look). But probably 80-90% of women said something along the lines of, "you know it's weird you're not my normal type at all. I never would have guessed we'd hook up" or "I'm not normally into As…
/r/seduction12/11/25 05:35 AM
3

There are no secrets. Just have good game.
/r/seduction12/11/25 05:02 AM
33

To attract very attractive women? Minimum 7 figure income in most major metropolises aka high cost of living places in the US. But you'd be an idiot to use money. One of the fastest ways to get taken advantage of.
/r/seduction12/11/25 04:57 AM
40

If you're talking about actual social status, that status can come and go, like money. And if we're talking about very attractive women, they're not attracted to moderate levels of status. So if you're going to use status or money you need a lot of it. Basically you need to be wealthy or famous, and fame of that level can be something that people use you for.
/r/seduction12/11/25 04:38 AM
182

Have top tier skill, money, or status. But money and status are problematic because you cant tell if a girl is just using you so you'll never really be sure if she likes you for you. That leaves skill as the only real viable option.
/r/seduction12/11/25 03:45 AM
13

Being good looking helps, but its not absolutely required. My girl was not physically attracted to me when we first met and i was definitely not her type. But she's very attracted to me now and we've been in an amazing relationship for 8 years. By far the best relationship ive ever been in.
/r/seduction12/11/25 03:43 AM
2

dude this is going to sound really stupid and tone deaf but... i dont remember who it was. It was like 2 decades ago and I've dated a lot of women since then. I used to see guys writing down the names of every girl like notches on a bedpost and i used to think, "thats dumb, of course i'll remember every girl, im not a monster." But give that a couple of decades and a lot of dating experiences and a poor memory on top of things, and I can't for the life of me remember who the first girl was. That…
/r/seduction12/11/25 02:03 AM
1

yeah apparently people are starting to overuse words like "delve" because they hear chatgpt use it so much lmao
/r/seduction12/11/25 01:40 AM
1

hahaha not sure what would be more impressive, growing a foot taller, turning white, or only aging 10 years over a 20-25 year period
/r/seduction12/11/25 01:33 AM
1

The post is written very obviously to give advice, so it isnt just sharing personal experience. Giving advice is fine, but the problem i have is that its garbage advice, it looks like it's written with AI, and to add insult to injury, it's a sales pitch on top of it all.
/r/seduction11/11/25 09:12 PM
24

lmao i wasnt 100% sure if it was chatgpt so i didnt say anything. It sounded somewhat like it (same phrasing and verbal patterns), but most AI detectors i ran it through said it was inconclusive. Some evidence of AI, some not.
/r/seduction11/11/25 01:23 PM
2

Started in the early 2000s when I was a 5'4" Asian virgin in my 20s who had never held a girl's hand. Painfully shy and socially awkward. Was voted "nicest boy" in jr high. Never went to prom because no one would go with me. Graduated high school without a single girl ever liking me in 13 years of schooling. Thought it was absolutely hopeless and I would die alone until I found mASF. Put the reps in, started to make improvements, got recruited to be a coach, got even better, checked off every da…
/r/seduction11/11/25 09:34 AM
175

Dude this post helps no one. You promised to show guys how to stop getting friend zoned, and the only actionable items you gave were: I didn't over-clarifying my intentions I let the silence hang instead of filling it with effort Awesome, so for a beginner who is getting stuck in the friend zone, all he knows after reading this nothingburger of a post is to let the conversation stall into awkward silence, and don't clarify why he's talking to the girl, and BOOM! No more friend zone. Right. If yo…
/r/seduction11/11/25 09:25 AM
83

Be careful not to interpret this advice as "if you start a conversation and she doesnt immediately try to fuck you, run away because you cant handle anything other than an easy set"
/r/seduction10/11/25 10:32 PM
3

Remember that playful teasing is not HARSH teasing. Its not supposed to put you down or make you feel bad at all. Its supposed to make you laugh. Think of it more like being funny in a very charismatic way. Watch how Matt Rife or Craig Ferguson tease. They're never mean-spirited about it. The person theyre teasing doesnt get offended by it, they LOVE IT. Your definition of "good" is "dont take any risks," which is closer to "harmless" than "ethical." If a woman is being slapped around by a guy, …
/r/seduction10/11/25 10:13 PM
0

This is very well-meaning advice, but the issue with i have with "be yourself" is that it doesnt take into account that a lot of people are socially underdeveloped or socially awkward. "Being themselves" simply means continuing to be awkward. "Being yourself" is great in theory, but in practice it encourages people to accept their deficiencies and poor social skills and not work on improving, for fear of "trying to be someone theyre not." You are not your social skills. You are not your social a…
/r/seduction10/11/25 09:33 PM
1

Dude i'm STILL confused. I've read the entire comments section hoping that someone will explain what OP means, but this makes the most sense.
/r/seduction10/11/25 09:59 AM
4

youre just a socially awkward guy. No shade to OP, we're all here to help as best we can, but I think you nailed it here.
/r/seduction10/11/25 09:57 AM
19

Your understanding of what "good" means is pretty skewed, man. "Good" does not mean "agreeable" or "harmless." It means, "doing the right or ethical or moral thing, even when its unpopular or no one is watching." I take a lot of pride in having a pretty strong sense of ethics and morality, but i have ZERO problem with playful teasing, because playful teasing (when done correctly) makes people feel GOOD, not bad. It creates bonds, friendships, and relationships, and makes people laugh and have a …
/r/seduction10/11/25 09:55 AM
2

Women dislike BOTH "nice guy syndrome guys" as well as "guys with no social skills." It's not an either/or.
/r/seduction10/11/25 09:25 AM
97

Your understanding of the theory of "nice guys" is relatively correct. Whats happening here is that you're likely exhibiting some off-putting or socially awkward behaviors and mixing that up with the "nice" thing. It's not that you're being too nice or that you're being too fuckboy. Its that youre making other social mistakes that you haven't yet identified.
/r/seduction10/11/25 06:45 AM
27

Super common if you are: Tall + decent looking + shy or bad social skills
/r/seduction10/11/25 02:22 AM
8

You're not going to like the correct answer: Have better game. It's sort of like the answer to how do you win a fight against a bigger guy: Be a better fighter. There is no shortcut technique to automatically be better. You just have to have stronger fundamentals and better execution.
/r/seduction09/11/25 12:10 PM
2

Dude, SO MANY GIRLS have slept with me on the first date SOLELY because they could tell i would never judge them. It really makes you sad when you realize that guys would rather hold onto their prejudices than have sex.
/r/seduction09/11/25 10:36 AM
2

Thanks man, and no worries about the downvotes. It's the internet, it happens. I'm only here to help out, because these types of groups are who helped me when i was struggling and didnt know wtf i was doing. Appreciate the support!
/r/seduction09/11/25 10:32 AM
2

Oh i get what you mean. Sorry, I misread your first comment. I edited the original comment to you. What i was pushing back against was the idea that women who make you wait are not into you, are controlling, or are less worthy of a relationship. In other words, the idea that her making you wait is necessarily a toxic behavior that would make her a bad partner. I was bringing up the fact that making guys wait is actually a SMART strategy for most women, not a toxic one. It's smart because MOST gu…
/r/seduction09/11/25 10:25 AM
11

It's okay. It's not going to do wonders for you, but anything that gets you talking to women is good. Most women are not going to be super excited to take a photo of a stranger, even if she says yes, and she's also going to wonder why you didnt just take a selfie. Might make a bit more sense if youre standing in front of a huge tourist attraction, but that severely limits the applicability of this opener.
/r/seduction09/11/25 09:34 AM
0

You're going to read this thread in 10 years and the cringe is going to kill you lol. All good, man, no judgment. I'm sure i said equally stupid shit when I was younger.
/r/seduction09/11/25 09:15 AM
3

Uhh i'm a guy so i can't really answer that question, and my SO (who is the girl in our PFP and who also posts on this account) has never done something like that, so unfortunately i dont think either of us are qualified to answer your question honestly. That said, I think one of the reasons this topic is so triggering for guys (and im sure it was super triggering for me when I was a student studying this stuff too), is because it hits on all of our fears that women are taking advantage of us, g…
/r/seduction09/11/25 09:08 AM
2

Sort of. What youre describing is largely thought of by scientists as a combination of evolutionary circuitry AND cultural programming. So you're not entirely wrong that it feels like it's built-in. That being said, racism, bigotry, murdering your sexual competition, and domestic violence are ALSO "built into our DNA" but that doesn't make it something we're okay with. The theory behind why we're repulsed by female sexual promiscuity is because men are existentially terrified of killing off thei…
/r/seduction09/11/25 08:56 AM
1

Good catch
/r/seduction09/11/25 08:31 AM
1

"Do you come here often" is the most cliched pickup line in existence, at least here in America. It wont always immediately destroy your set, but it gets enough eye rolls to make it less than optimal. You're better off going with something funnier or more unique / emotionally evocative: "has anyone ever told you that you dance like a black girl?" "could you dance a little more like a white girl to make my dancing look better?" "you have the most amazing smile"
/r/seduction09/11/25 07:59 AM
2

Edit: sorry i misread your comment. Yes, i referred to the guys as dumb because its dumb for guys to look down on women for having sex too soon because it incentivizes women to make you wait to avoid your judgment. I would assume most guys dont WANT to be forced to wait, but its their own doing. Hence, dumb. It's the optimal strategy for women because the vast vast majority of men think this way, so their best bet is to assume its true unless proven otherwise. You could argue that a BETTER strat…
/r/seduction09/11/25 07:50 AM
3

FYI guys, if a girl suspects you will not judge her and will not look down on her if she has sex with you right away... she's more than likely going to have sex with you right away.
/r/seduction09/11/25 07:21 AM
-19

If a woman makes a guy wait because she likes him, but then calls up a FWB and has sex with him, that doesnt make her evil or immoral or unethical. Its simply a strategy, and it's a strategy that pretty much ALL OF US would do if we were in her situation. She's not "making the guy wait" to fuck with him or out of malice (most of the time). That would be an absolutely retarded dating strategy and completely illogical. What would she have to gain from that besides taking pleasure in cruelty like a…
/r/seduction09/11/25 07:18 AM
5

invalid reasons: to play games or to manipulate valid reasons: because guys judge the fuck out of women (e.g., the obsession with "body count") for their sexuality, because society judges women for their sexuality, because they aren't comfortable with the guy yet, because theyre on their period or feel bloated, because it doesnt feel right yet.
/r/seduction09/11/25 07:08 AM
157

Absolute rules are rarely true and that applies here. There are many reasons why she might want to wait and not all of them are invalid. The optimal dating strategy for women is actually not to have sex right away and it's not because she doesnt want to. It's because dumb guys look down on women for their sexuality and then wonder why women aren't willing to immediately have sex even when they want to.
/r/seduction09/11/25 01:29 AM
0

Look up exposure therapy. Or if you want, scroll through my previous answers or search for any reply i've made where i say "exposure therapy." I've broken down exactly how to do this a few dozens times.
/r/seduction09/11/25 12:23 AM
12

Good job pushing yourself, man. And youre right, challenging yourself is the name of the game. In general you want to focus on the interaction more than getting a number. If it's a good interaction, the number will flow automatically once you invite her to something and she enthusiastically says yes. If she doesnt say yes, a number is worthless.
/r/seduction07/11/25 11:27 PM
1

A little bit late to the party but you are 100% doing things correctly. This is a skill set, not a magic elixir, and the way you get good at this skill set is the same way you get good at almost every other skill set: Practice, evaluation, root cause analysis, error correction, reps, repeat.
/r/seduction07/11/25 10:25 PM
3

This is a delivery issue almost assuredly. My guys have been running this opener for almost 20 years and this is not a normal reaction.
/r/seduction07/11/25 10:20 PM
1

First get a therapist and make sure youre not suffering from major depressive disorder.
/r/seduction07/11/25 08:19 PM
3

You could have abnormal hormone levels or even potentially a tumor on your pituitary. Get the following tested: Total Testosterone using LC/MS Free Testosterone using Equilibrium Dialysis (or ultrafiltration) Sex Hormone Binding Globulin (SHBG) Estradiol / E2, preferably using LC/MS
/r/seduction06/11/25 06:17 PM
4

Dude you guys have to give WAY more information if you want useful answers. We dont know what your history is, how much experience you have, what country you're in, what your goals are, if youre autistic, etc
/r/seduction06/11/25 07:32 AM
1

Can you approach direct or no?
/r/seduction05/11/25 09:20 PM
1

What's the point where you start to struggle?
/r/seduction05/11/25 09:18 PM
3

Yup
/r/seduction05/11/25 09:16 PM
2

No, it's not that spiritual. This is more of a skill than a spiritual practice.
/r/seduction05/11/25 09:16 PM
2

Ask for directions and then walk away. Do it until it becomes easy and trivial.
/r/seduction05/11/25 09:15 PM
5

Go out and start approaching immediately, even if its 10 approaches to ask for directions and then walking away. Momentum is key
/r/seduction05/11/25 09:11 PM
4

Do not let your worth be defined by the girls you spend time with or sleep with.
/r/seduction05/11/25 09:05 PM
14

Uhh guys, shit tests are not a blanket term for any time a girl does something you dont like, or when you think she might be testing for something. A shit test is not a generic test. A shit test is when a girl suspects that you are not authentic or genuine and she is testing specifically to see if you're pretending to be something you're not. It's really an authenticity test. A girl who is pulling away after sex is not a test for your authenticity. It's a girl who is losing interest or has lost …
/r/seduction05/11/25 09:03 PM
16

100% true, but i think most of us need to experience it firsthand to really understand it and to come to terms with it. Otherwise it's mostly a cope for not having the skill to do it. A martial arts master and a coward both refuse to fight. And both cite the reason as "fighting isnt worth it." But the martial arts master is saying it from a place of firsthand experience. The coward is saying it as a cover for fear.
/r/seduction05/11/25 07:55 PM
1

Learn humor / teasing Watch Matt Rife's crowdwork. Best I've ever seen at teasing, and that includes the best coaches in the world.
/r/seduction05/11/25 07:52 PM
2

I get that we're both coaches, but i would agree here even if i wasnt a coach. It's blatantly obvious if you substitute "game" with "losing weight/getting fit". Can't lose weight even if youve been trying for 11 years? You should probably get a trainer/registered dietician.
/r/seduction05/11/25 07:49 PM
0

If the goal is to get laid, go pay for it. Cheaper and easier. Your goal should be to get BETTER, not to get laid, otherwise you are too incentivized to go for lower quality just to get laid and/or to cheat with things like cocaine, money, etc.
/r/seduction05/11/25 07:48 PM
1

Excuses are like assholes, everyone has one, and they all stink.
/r/seduction05/11/25 07:46 PM
1

You've done ~100 approaches every single week (14 per day, 7 days a week), with no weeks off, no vacations, no sick days, no days for dates, no days for relationships... for 260 consecutive weeks? That sounds pretty exaggerated, man. I have more than 4x the amount of experience you have (started approaching in 2004, started coaching in '07) and I have probably 15k sets in that amount of time, and I was a pretty high volume guy. 25k approaches in 5 year is like saying you run 100 miles a day, eve…
/r/seduction05/11/25 07:45 PM
4

He spent 11 years developing excuses so thats why there was no time left to study the fundamentals
/r/seduction05/11/25 07:40 PM
1

Yeah u/Thin_Protection5616's advice is spot on. OP would be wise to put aside his ego and pay attention, even if it's a hard pill to swallow.
/r/seduction05/11/25 07:39 PM
1

Dont know what youre replying to, but social acceptance isnt really relevant except that there's more social pressure to deal with. But if youre fat hanging around fat people, theres also social pressure to stay fat. But that doesnt mean you have to stay fat. As far as roadmap, yes, that is a valid concern. The dating roadmap is very confusing because the avg person has an F in dating knowledge but the average person has a C in fitness knowledge so it's going to be easier to start a fitness jour…
/r/seduction05/11/25 07:37 PM
1

i want to sticky this to my username because i hear this stupid logic every fucking day.
/r/seduction05/11/25 07:35 PM
2

Good job man! You just did something that the vast majority of men cant do. Be proud of yourself for that. And remember that past events do NOT predict future outcomes unless you stay the same. If you are improving, the past is a poor predictor. ("i couldnt lift 200 lbs last year so that means i cant lift 200 lbs this year even though ive been getting stronger every month for the last 12 months")
/r/seduction05/11/25 07:33 PM
5

another crucial lesson for him: Use paragraphs in his post
/r/seduction04/11/25 04:09 AM
1

Not often that i laugh out loud reading this sub but this did it
/r/seduction03/11/25 09:57 AM
2

Recommending a more appropriate sub is not a sales pitch. His request had absolutely nothing to do with red pill.
/r/ExRedPill03/11/25 06:10 AM
2

This isnt really the right sub for this, man. I would recommend r/socialskills or r/aspergers or even (shameless plug) r/mensdatinghardmode.
/r/ExRedPill03/11/25 02:37 AM
2

I get it, man. But it's a club, no one even remembers you the next day. If she throws obvious signs of discomfort, pull back, but don't not push things forward when there are clear signs because there's a POTENTIAL for someone to be uncomfortable. Think of it like this: She's more likely to feel disappointed that you didnt step up and lead than to feel uncomfortable because you led. Very very few women resent a man for leading gracefully, even if she gets uncomfortable and he takes the hint and …
/r/seduction03/11/25 01:02 AM
2

ohhhhh if she's like "cmon do something, why do i have to lead for you" that changes EVERYTHING. Very important data point. That's an indicator that she wants you to escalate but you didnt want to or were scared or refused, and she got discouraged and bailed.
/r/seduction02/11/25 10:29 PM
3

If things are getting hot and heavy and then they suddenly have to go, theres a good chance you pushed too fast and it made them uncomfortable. The other possibility (which sometimes happens but less often) is that youre just the fun "club makeout guy" and their ADHD kicked in.
/r/seduction02/11/25 09:43 PM
1

I am so confused
/r/seduction02/11/25 09:16 PM
7

Remember this adage: Neediness is not WHAT you do, it's WHY you do it. It's the intention behind the behavior, not the behavior itself. So if you approach her without the emotion of neediness, it almost doesnt matter WHAT you say, because she's reading the intention, not the behavior. This is why advanced guys can walk up and say overtly needy things to a girl "omg where have you been all my life? Youre beautiful, lets get married tonight" and its fine, but someone else does it and it comes off …
/r/seduction01/11/25 02:27 AM
1

Yeah you're good, dude. No one is going to recognize something as ancient as the m3 model, even if people did pay attention (which they do not). Every once in a great while circa 2005 you'd get someone who recognizes a "stock" opinion opener (maybe 1 in 300 or 1 in 400?) but after that era, I never saw it get recognized again. And the model is even more obscure. RE: Reading, you're vastly overestimating people. People in this sub (and in general) don't read ANYTHING anymore except reddit and com…
/r/seduction29/10/25 08:32 AM
1

Good post. I am VERY suspicious of guys who claim to have 200+ lays, especially if they're relatively young or non-famous. I've found over time that the vast vast majority of them are lying (which becomes obvious when you get to know them and their stories fall apart), and the ones who aren't lying end up being almost universally broken, like you said. It does make sense, though. Even the guys starting with the worst scarcity are going to get over that and gain a significant amount of skill or c…
/r/seduction29/10/25 05:15 AM
1

Wait you think that the general public will recognize the m3 model in a bar? 90% of guys in this sub think the m3 model is a car made by BMW or Tesla, aint no way in hell the general public is going to recognize shit. In 2006, during the heyday of pickup and shortly after the game was published, I ran the "jealous girlfriend" opener on national television (the dr phil show) on 10 consecutive sets at saddle ranch in west hollywood, the mecca of pickup and where Mystery and co were bringing boot c…
/r/seduction29/10/25 05:02 AM
1

Do you have dysthymia by chance?
/r/seduction29/10/25 04:48 AM
2

This is sick, dude. Love this. This is exactly the kind of group that I had back in the day that got me big improvements in my development. If this ever gets off the ground, i'd be down to volunteer some time to do a talk or Q&A or something for your group if you guys are interested. Feel free to send a DM. When I was a student, some of the coaches in the industry did that for us and i always remembered it.
/r/seduction29/10/25 02:47 AM
1

You MIGHT get this occasionally in a club when liquid courage (or cocaine) causes people to be more sexually aggressive. But in the day time, it's rare that a woman stares at you blatantly and when you look over and make eye contact, she continues to stare you down like you owe her money for 3-4 seconds. That RARELY happens. Its not even sexy at that point, its rude and threatening. I can count the number of times ive seen that happen on one hand in tens of thousands of approaches and 20 years o…
/r/seduction28/10/25 12:06 PM
1

Either your observations about women staring is incorrect (very common), or you're turning women off with your behaviors once you meet them (also common). Both are fixable issues, though. What makes me think the staring thing is incorrect is that most women RARELY stare without breaking eye contact. Even when theyre attracted to you. Thats just not how women make eye contact, so it leads me to believe that there might be an issue with observation accuracy.
/r/seduction28/10/25 10:56 AM
1

Dont feel the blackpill dude
/r/seduction26/10/25 11:45 PM
3

Best answer
/r/seduction26/10/25 10:49 PM
2

Hi, I'm Nikki, the woman on this account . There was no manipulation on how I fell in love with him. You're assuming manipulation always? Women don't primarily select on looks, it's not weird or unethical to be able to create attraction through other means like being funny, showing competence, confidence etc. I wasnt initially attracted to him but his confidence and ability to lead, and make me laugh constantly (his game) was super attractive and I developed a huge crush on him. Yes , there are …
/r/seduction26/10/25 10:20 PM
6

I get what you're saying, but filtering for only girls who are super physically attracted to you isn't game. It's running around looking for girls who think you're hot. Game is being able to create interest in women who normally wouldnt find you attractive.
/r/seduction26/10/25 02:56 AM
1

High test is absolutely associated with anger and irritability. It's one of the main side effects and there'ss tons of clinical literature out there on it. "Because emotions are closely linked to testosterone levels, once raised past normal ranges, men may become irritable and angry again." Source "Testosterone activates the subcortical areas of the brain to produce aggression, while cortisol and serotonin act antagonistically with testosterone to reduce its effects." Source Same with acne and e…
/r/seduction26/10/25 02:52 AM
4

Good job man! Just a couple of quick (constructive) nitpicks -- you dont want to feed the EGO, you want to feed a healthy IDENTITY or SELF CONCEPT. Identity/Self concept is who you believe you are. Ego is who you want others to think you are. Very close, but not the same thing. Your FR suggests youre training to learn to filter for who likes you vs create attraction. That's filtering game, which can work for some guys, but it doesn't generally result in you getting more attractive women over tim…
/r/seduction25/10/25 10:33 PM
1

Will need to ask you follow up questions to get a correct diagnosis. DMed you
/r/seduction25/10/25 10:01 PM
2

yeah sort of. You want to do the most targeted type of interaction to fit your weakness. So for example if youre terrified of showing direct interest, you want to focus on direct approaches independent of length of time. On the other hand, if youre bad at having normal casual conversations, you may want to prioritize indirect approaches because that would be your weak spot. There's no one size fits all recommendation. Its all dependent on your weaknesses.
/r/seduction25/10/25 02:53 AM
2

20-50 interactions per week. Length doesn't matter that much but try to increase the difficulty over time
/r/seduction25/10/25 02:08 AM
1

Risky click?
/r/seduction24/10/25 09:37 PM
21

Lol higher test levels are also correlated with uncontrolled and unhinged anger issues, excessive acne, irritability, enlarged prostate, and erectile dysfunction. Are you sure you want to make the claim that "anything that displays higher testosterone levels gets a woman's attraction levels elevated?"
/r/seduction24/10/25 07:32 PM
1

Yeah thats totally fair, i guess I was just clarifying for those reading it and thinking "hey this sounds way easier, i should do the same thing."
/r/seduction24/10/25 06:10 PM
1

The scenario youre laying out is precisely why a good coach's answer to most questions is "it depends" Because what youre describing is a perfectly reasonable mindset and strategy for your situation. But abysmally bad for the average guy here, who doesnt have a roster of options around the world. It's sort of like being picky on who you spar with in boxing. If you're a pro boxer thats probably a good idea. Sparring with beginners is mostly a waste of your time. But if you're a beginner who is ju…
/r/seduction24/10/25 05:29 PM
1

You are correct, but it depends on the location. A hike in the wilderness when she's never met you and you're a 6'2" hulking beast of a guy? Terrifying. But a hike at runyon canyon in los angeles (which is an easy hike with a nice view and has a few hundred other people there walking alongside you) is very different. Feels very safe because its more like a walk in a busy park than a traditional hike in nature.
/r/seduction24/10/25 05:15 PM
1

interactive and fun is generally more effective than sitting and talking, even if your game is VERY good. As far as cheap goes, if DnB is too expensive, pick a barcade or even a retro arcade that takes quarters.
/r/seduction24/10/25 05:11 PM
0

Magic is indeed useful (90% of mystery's attraction game is based on it) if you know how to do it, but be careful not to use it as a crutch and let the rest of your game be sloppy. Getting a phone number from a woman with zero connection is mostly going to be flakey numbers because youre prioritizing a phone number and not the actual connection. Magic will only get you so far if the rest of your fundamentals arent there. It will quickly be a limiting factor. I know this from personal experience.…
/r/seduction24/10/25 05:08 PM
1

Vancouver. You know that canada doesnt actually have freedom of speech, right? They dont have 1st amendment rights because they dont have a 1st amendment. They can be prosecuted for speaking out. It doesnt happen very often, but its legal. But to be fair, guys were harassing the women. Like following them around, not leaving them alone. Even if they had a 1st amendment right in Canada, it wouldnt protect that behavior.
/r/seduction24/10/25 06:16 AM
1

Nah never coached in Vancouver. A few years back the main street all the guys day gamed at started to go bad because too many guys were harassing women and the police started telling guys they cant approach there. Not sure what it's like today. A few students I had in vancouver a few years back reported that day game wasnt great though.
/r/seduction24/10/25 06:00 AM
1

DC is ghetto af from what i can remember teaching there. But that was over 10 years ago. Though I doubt much has changed. Havent been to Miami in years but have not heard good things recently either. Every dating coach I can think of who lives in Miami is a giant douchebag who doesnt live a life i would ever want, so that's not a good selling point for me. For day game specifically, NYC is still king from what i can tell. But only in the spring/fall/summer. Chicago is good in the summer too. May…
/r/seduction24/10/25 05:49 AM
6

Yup, this 100%. Must be sufficient volume though. Approaching 1 girl daily is okay to start, but it's like doing 1 workout a week in the gym. Insufficient volume for muscle growth past the beginner phase.
/r/seduction24/10/25 04:04 AM
1

2002-2010ish or so. That was project hollywood, The Game, the big world summit events, the superconferences, etc. I was the guy with the giant mohawk back then. Edit: in terms of cities, I suspect that NYC is still king because of the population density but it really depends on what your objective is. Parts of LA are still good but the city as a whole is being really bogged down by crime and cost of living so it's not as good as it once was. Plus there's no real "community" like there was back i…
/r/seduction24/10/25 04:01 AM
1

hey OP, you are DEAD ON in your assessment here that this is a listening issue. Kudos to you for the self awareness. For YEARS (well over a decade tbh) we addressed this issued (called 'question stacking') by treating the symptom, which is that you're asking too many questions. So we proposed to instead reformulate them into statements like a cold read, or give strong opinions or relate to her to break up the back to back questions. We even encouraged guys circa 2010 to stop asking questions alt…
/r/seduction23/10/25 10:54 PM
1

Born and raised in LA and did most of my training in the area during the heyday of pickup. It's gradually getting worse and worse. Still decent in parts of West LA but other areas are turning into a hell hole. It is not the mecca that it was during the project hollywood days.
/r/seduction23/10/25 12:16 PM
2

oh it was DEFINITELY a lot of exaggeration haha. I was around during that era. Entertaining, yes, documentary, no.
/r/seduction23/10/25 12:14 PM
3

Text game is a reflection of your in-person game. I've never seen a guy be super witty in person and then boring af in text. If you're funny and witty and charming in real life, you're going to reflect that on text as well in 99% of situations. So don't focus on text-specific techniques. Focus on getting your base fundamentals down well so you can operate in any environment.
/r/seduction23/10/25 12:12 PM
2

The "ozempic" system so he doesnt have a heart attack in 6 months and die. Only half kidding with that, because a 40 year old at 500 lbs is genuinely at death's door in most situations. But assuming we're exaggerating: The guy who is at a severe disadvantage like this probably wants to first identify if he's neurodivergent or on the spectrum and also figure out if he has other disabilities because those are going to dictate what route he takes. A very sizeable percentage of 30 and 40 year old vi…
/r/seduction23/10/25 05:54 AM
14

It depends on what you're struggling with, but overall i would not suggest trying to find a system in order to "get laid." Focusing on the outcome is going to make you needy and sloppy. If you focus on GETTING BETTER, the sex will come automatically. But focusing on getting laid is just going to telegraph to women that you're desperate. Here are some examples in other areas: Q: If you're trying to get better at a FPS, do you focus on skill building or getting a good KDR? A: Skill, because focusi…
/r/seduction22/10/25 11:37 PM
5

Both are rude and not funny. There are 2 rules to teasing: It has to be funnier than it is harsh It has to be done first and foremost to create laughter that you share together. Not to put her down. If you say something and its genuinely funny but your intent is to put her down, it will fail most of the time because she will sense your intent, and your intent is not to connect, it's to put her down.
/r/seduction22/10/25 09:39 PM
1

This MIGHT work for him, but even if it does, what works for advanced guys is VERY different from what beginners or intermediate guys should do. It's like jordan just saying "dude, just dunk from the free throw line, problem solved"
/r/seduction22/10/25 02:50 PM
5

That's rough. He might outgrow it eventually, but in the mean time it's definitely going to damage his relationships with women, to include family members. Would your dad not even be willing to talk to him about the problem of disrespect or violence towards your mom and you? I'm a Marine and usually military guys are pretty good about that even if they aren't good at expressing their feelings and talking about emotions. If that doesnt work, if you have any guy friends whom he might look up to an…
/r/ExRedPill22/10/25 03:00 AM
8

I'm assuming you're his big sister? Does he have a big brother or father figure who can talk to him? He's probably not going to listen to women right now because he views them as the "enemy." He needs a strong male role model he looks up to to basically tell him why this is wrong and why it will ruin his life if he continues down this path. Therapy would also be excellent if you can find a good one and if he will go.
/r/ExRedPill22/10/25 02:39 AM
1

"I want to get really good at boxing but I've never boxed before. But I won't spar with anyone who isn't a pro boxer." Do you see how that will hold you back?
/r/seduction21/10/25 11:31 PM
1

Your ego is killing you dude. You're not going to get better with an ego the size of montana
/r/seduction21/10/25 11:18 PM
1

Similar question: "i dont know how to fight and have never been in a fight but a pro boxer wants to fight me tomorrow. Do you think i can beat him?"
/r/seduction21/10/25 11:05 PM
29

That its okay to be a man. You are not toxic by being a man. That women and society are not out to get you That hating or resenting women does not make them like you. It does the opposite.
/r/ExRedPill21/10/25 09:34 PM
2

I read this comment and thought "damn this is fucking solid" and then i looked up and realized it was you and was like oh no wonder lol
/r/seduction21/10/25 08:59 PM
1

Oh wow i had no idea he passed away. I never met him personally. He wasnt super active on the scene and didnt really speak at many of the major conventions
/r/seduction21/10/25 08:11 PM
1

Its not crazy at all, actually. I see this on a daily basis because ive been diagnosing dating problems for a living for nearly 20 years. Virtually nothing surprises me anymore. What you're looking for is feedback, which is fair. Unfortunately women don't generally give precise feedback when theres a problem, so you're going to have to either: a) self diagnose based on trial and error and patterns of behavior b) have a friend help you diagnose by watching you interact c) have a coach or mentor d…
/r/seduction21/10/25 07:03 AM
4

If you've ever done a shitload of cold approaches, you'd know that these lines, while not the best I've ever heard, are perfectly fine for a newbie. Not sure why you guys think these are cringe unless you're all 16 or something. I make zero claims to know what's cool among 16 year olds.
/r/seduction21/10/25 06:48 AM
6

He's not actually pretending to leave, its a joke. The lines are fine for guys just starting out who need more concrete examples other than "just be confident and let it happen organically."
/r/seduction21/10/25 06:46 AM
5

why hello there chatgpt
/r/seduction21/10/25 06:23 AM
3

Of course we can, game is simply a social and dating skill set. And yes, asian men are, on average, considered less attractive than other ethnicities, but that does NOT mean you can't get good, only that you're at somewhat of a disadvantage. Being short has an almost identical disadvantage to being an Asian man as it relates to dating. (Ask me how I know lol). But that doesnt mean I didn't succeed in spite of being both Asian AND super short.
/r/seduction21/10/25 06:17 AM
1

Forgot the sarcasm tag
/r/seduction21/10/25 12:41 AM
4

90% of mystery's attraction came from this right here, and he was/is VERY good. One of the best illusionists i've ever met, and I dabbled in magic myself for years when I was a kid.
/r/seduction20/10/25 10:43 PM
3

I'm not sure how long it took erik/mystery, but i think it was several years for him to ever go from meet to sex on a cold approach. TD/Owen famously took 18 months (iirc) of cold approaching probably 50 approaches a week before he had sex. It took me almost a year in 2004/2005. It takes my students usually 3-6 months. And many of these are hard case virgins. Each successive generation gets faster and faster in terms of progress because they learn from the collective wisdom of the generation bef…
/r/seduction20/10/25 10:40 PM
3

Direct / Semi Direct: * Stopping a girl on the street * When she shows interest before the approach * When it doesnt make any sense to open indirect (e.g., you have to walk all the way across the room to talk to her and there's no plausible reason why youd do that aside from going to talk to her) * When you are afraid of showing interest in a woman * When your confidence / inner game is a sticking point or when you tend to be timid, meek, or a people pleaser. Indirect / Situational / Functional:…
/r/seduction20/10/25 11:08 AM
2

Do you isolate one and drill it for a week? Do you record your interactions? Or do you prefer to get feedback from wingmen/coaches? All of the above. Except many of the skill sets require more than a week to get down. But youre on the right track by focusing on fundamentals. Just make sure you get some decent guidance if you dont have a natural knack for this or the overabundance of confusing material out there will likely cause you to go in the wrong direction. You learn best by combining drill…
/r/seduction19/10/25 11:53 PM
13

Indirect is smoother and overall more effective, everything else being equal. But direct is more efficient, builds more confidence, better for inner game, and sometimes is the only approach that makes sense in the context. Overall you need both to be well rounded and effective. Think of it like striking vs grappling as a fighter. You can't succeed with only 1 unless youre fighting newbies.
/r/seduction19/10/25 10:43 PM
8

The irony of us calling him out for using AI in his posts, and then he replies to us using AI. Someone else pointed out that we may be talking to a fully autonomous bot. That would not shock me at all. The dead internet theory is starting to feel very very real.
/r/seduction17/10/25 08:39 PM
2

The em dash (—) is very hard to generate on a normal keyboard and so almost no one uses it. On windows, you have to hold alt and type "0151" or pull up the symbols app and copy and paste it to get it to come out. It's not a normal character humans use when typing, especially casually. But chatGPT loves it and uses it constantly. Notice how many times he uses it both in comments and in posts. He also uses excessive bullet point lists, excessive emojis in his latest post, and phrasing that chatgpt…
/r/seduction17/10/25 08:29 PM
7

Yeah no one is arguing that the principles arent real psychological principles, but its impossible to know if you had chatgpt help you with formatting or if you had it write the entire piece by itself and you simply copied and pasted it into a new post and pretended like you wrote it yourself. People dislike chatgpt the same reason they dislike plagiarism -- it is someone likely taking credit for something they did not write and have no expertise in. Looking at your entire history (comments, pos…
/r/seduction17/10/25 10:07 AM
2

This entire guy's post history is GPT generated, including both posts and comments.
/r/seduction17/10/25 09:37 AM
64

No one is going to call out that this was OBVIOUSLY written by chatgpt? The excessive emojis, the em dashes, the "its not X, its Y" patterns?
/r/seduction17/10/25 08:39 AM
13

yeah OP whoever told you to do this, stop listening to them or get clarification. If they said "dress well when you leave the house," you misinterpreted the instruction.
/r/seduction17/10/25 03:45 AM
23

So youre going to judge 4 billion women because you know 1 girl who does something you don't approve of?
/r/seduction17/10/25 03:22 AM
28

i thought i was in an incel/blackpill sub for a second here
/r/seduction17/10/25 03:21 AM
2

dont go from boring small talk to trying to ask her out. That's like going from counting numbers to calculus. You're missing all of the steps in between. She has to want the product (you) before you ask for the sale (the date). Asking for the sale before the prospect wants the product usually just makes you seem like a pushy salesmen. In dating, this means you need to be fun and playful and interesting BEFORE you ask her out. Otherwise why would she go out with you when all youve been doing is b…
/r/seduction16/10/25 04:34 AM
1

2005 era MM is relatively outdated by today's standards but it can still work with some tweaks. There are better options today, though, as you would expect from 20 years of R&D.
/r/seduction15/10/25 03:19 PM
1

thousands of cold approaches + training with the best coaches + writing FRs every single time i went out so that i continued to improve after each rep.
/r/seduction15/10/25 04:36 AM
15

In high school I thought women liked athletes so i joined the wrestling team and worked my ass off to make the varsity team. Didn't change anything. After high school I joined the Marines, and while that wasnt my main reason for joining, I thought that being a Marine would at least change things. Didn't change anything. After the Marines I got a 6 figure job in software engineering because "everyone knows women like guys with money." Didn't change anything. Then I found game and thats when thing…
/r/seduction15/10/25 02:33 AM
0

Oh yeah i agree with the emotional support. When i said training I meant ongoing live coaching in addition to emotional support. As in have a coach take him out every week or every other week to do approaches aka exposure therapy + have wings and emotional support structure / community + psychotherapy and possibly even psychiatry (e.g., anti anxieties or medication for panic disorder) and i think thats probably the idea combination. The only problem with this is the expense.
/r/seduction15/10/25 02:05 AM
2

Whatever you look for, you will find, whether it's real or imagined
/r/seduction15/10/25 01:58 AM
3

GREAT distinction. Needs to be stickied here.
/r/seduction15/10/25 01:19 AM
2

iirc this is an official term in science. hilarious
/r/seduction15/10/25 01:19 AM
4

Yup. It's like going into a sub on bodybuilding and telling everyone its impossible to get big because big food is out to get you and force you to be fat, and because the government wants you to be fat so losing weight is impossible. That is not the sub for that ideology.
/r/seduction14/10/25 09:02 PM
1

haha I didnt know you were aussie!
/r/seduction14/10/25 09:00 PM
0

You know, I actually kind of disagree with this, man, though I think its because we're referring to two different things. I think youre referring to online coaching, which, yeah 100% relies on the individual to be able to execute on instructions. But i'm actually thinking that what OP needs is LIVE, like in person mentoring, where a coach shows up at his doorstep and forces him to go out and socialize with him. OP needs someone to hold his hand and actually implement, which is probably one of th…
/r/seduction14/10/25 07:09 PM
1

Can you elaborate on what these drills are? Not familiar with julien's "game the wall" drill. Is it like monologuing and continuing to talk as if the other person isn't there or isnt contributing? Not familiar with Todd's "Question Answer Tease" drill either but Todd has been around a LONG ass time (he was coaching as "Xaneus" when i was a student in the early 2000s) and he is one of the better coaches from our era. That drill is likely the same thing as what we call "invest value cycling" which…
/r/seduction14/10/25 04:53 AM
1

Good memory on both Swanepoels! Yeah weirdly, candice and landi both had the last name Swanepoel and both from South Africa, but aren't related. I believe Erik dated Landi, Candice was too young I think. Not sure how long they dated though. But yeah it was early to mid 2000s i think, so right around that time. And 100% correct about the insecurity thing. Their entire career and livelihood is based on what random people think about their attractiveness, which is going to wane over time. Not a goo…
/r/seduction13/10/25 10:49 AM
2

Yeah i know what you mean, man. It's impossible to say who can pull a "10" because everyone's idea of a 10 is different. But you can broadly estimate general attractiveness, and I've definitely seen him pull generally attractive women. I believe one of the more well known women that Mystery dated was Landi (but it's been almost 20 years, so dont quote me on that). This is her: https://media.gettyimages.com/id/112471209/photo/landi-during-o2-mobile-model-search-2005-grand-finale-and-party-arrival…
/r/seduction13/10/25 10:01 AM
2

The end goal IS exposure therapy. Youre only doing it to conquer the fear. That's it. But yeah this will require you to push yourself (or have someone else push you). But it does work, as long as you are consistent with it.
/r/seduction13/10/25 06:27 AM
1

Never met him, but wasnt overly impressed by his methodology. Seemed very primitive iirc. And im not even including the getting arrested drama.
/r/seduction13/10/25 06:25 AM
3

Don't go meta and ask about guys approaching. Looks like youre insecure about talking to them. If this was in the day time, this opener is weird. Night time only. After an opener like this, you have to give your take on it otherwise it sounds like a random ass question. Ideally your take is interesting and thought-provoking or funny. What you need after the opener is a transition. Learn to transition to a new topic, ideally one that is related and not random, though in a pinch you can ask how th…
/r/seduction13/10/25 04:53 AM
1

havent read it. Can you give a quick summary of what you liked?
/r/seduction13/10/25 04:01 AM
2

Yes, it's possible, but its rare and it's hard so you won't see it very often. It's like asking if its possible to be 5'7" or under and make it in the NBA. Yes, it is, but there are only a handful of guys who accomplished that because its a significant disadvantage being that short. You can look at my picture and assess whether you think i fit your criteria being 5'4". As to consistency, it depends on what you mean by consistency. NO ONE is going out and pulling the hottest girl in the bar home …
/r/seduction13/10/25 03:49 AM
4

It sounds less like the question is "how do i do it tactically" and more like "how do i do it without social anxiety?" Most people are answering question 1. The answer to question 2 is exposure therapy. Do a very very small scale version of it, something like walking up to a group and giving a brief compliment on their style and asking if they're from (your country) because they seem especially stylish or whatever. They will generally respond well (especially if it's a mixed group of guys/girls)…
/r/seduction13/10/25 03:42 AM
8

Easiest way to do it still is to walk up and ask for their take on some controversial topic (not political). Usually something dating related. Example: "my friends and i are arguing over the right way to break up with someone. They think that hypothetically if a woman breaks up with a guy for having horrific BO, she should tell him that, but if a guy breaks up with a girl for the same reason, he should lie because that will traumatize her. What do you guys think?" It's a crutch, yes, but it is v…
/r/seduction13/10/25 03:05 AM
1

Dude no disrespect, but all of your examples indicate that you have a very limited understanding of the book and the overall concepts of game. Either that or youre so enamored with MM that you are completely unwilling to see the limitations of it. I'm not anti mystery or anti MM at all -- i know the guy personally and i'm in the acknowledgements of his book. He is probably more responsible for me becoming a coach than anyone in the industry. But I can still highlight why a 20 year old text might…
/r/seduction13/10/25 01:14 AM
1

Somewhat. The techniques have changed with the times and women have also gotten a lot more sophisticated in the last 20 years. 20 years ago women LOVED firemen. Today they're catching on that firemen are often players and often cheat because of the abundance of options they have. NO ONE was talking about that in the mid 2000s.
/r/seduction13/10/25 12:28 AM
4

JP is very Anti-Red pill actually. He thinks it's psychopathic. But because red pill has co-opted a lot of the talking points from right leaning individuals or from evolutionary psychologist, people start equating conservatives with redpill or evolutionary psychology with red pill. It's not correct, but it's sort of like all red hats = MAGA now even though that's not true.
/r/ExRedPill13/10/25 12:26 AM
7

Even at the pro level, same night stuff is mostly about finding the girl who is down and has good logistics. Of course, you still have to have the skill to not fuck it up, but assuming you have baseline skill, its mostly about filtering. That said, I dont ever advise guys to start trying to go for ONS if they cant reliably get dates. That's like working on a 3 point fadeaway shot when you cant shoot a free throw. You're wasting your time on fancy shit when your fundamentals arent there.
/r/seduction13/10/25 12:07 AM
2

Mystery dated several "10s" in his day. Some of them are mentioned in his books. I was around for it and saw it firsthand. He was legitimately amazing infield in the 2000s.
/r/seduction12/10/25 11:44 PM
2

It's not that it suddenly stopped working, it's that it gradually got less and less effective over time. Like a smartphone from 2010. Technically it probably still turns on but you wouldnt really use it today
/r/seduction12/10/25 11:43 PM
3

It only got negative reviews from people not in the community because it's overly technical for the average person. It was absolutely revolutionary for its time, but so was the original Pentium CPU in the 1990s. But you wouldn't use it today. I taught this method for many many years so I know it well. I don't know which coaches you asked but clearly you didn't ask anyone with any experience. It is absolutely outdated and I can list out tons of reasons but here are just a few. It is distinctly mi…
/r/seduction12/10/25 11:12 PM
2

No. Read psychocybernetics as a general book on inner game and how the mind works, or if you can give us more specific issues you want to work on, i can give you more specific recommendations.
/r/seduction12/10/25 01:17 PM
11

Looks more like right wing politics channel than red pill really. Though I probably wouldn't risk it if you're already in danger of buying into RP ideology. Doesn't appear to be anything particularly insightful on this channel
/r/ExRedPill12/10/25 01:15 PM
9

Mind blowing and amazing for 2004. Very very awkward for 2025. You're better off looking at u/gusolsen's stuff. Dont know him personally but his content is pretty solid from what i can tell, and i'm VERY picky about who I think is legit.
/r/seduction12/10/25 01:11 PM
10

Dating Mindset: Models Inner Game Mindset / Beliefs: Psychocybernetics Tactics: VAH (though it's outdated/obsolete by 2025 standards and there are a lot of things that dont hold up today). Don't have a recommendation on something more recent, unfortunately. Everything i've perused seems to be pretty bad because the industry has been taken over by marketers trying to make a quick buck and outsourcing their books to an Indian ghostwriter who has never had sex before. Edit: Someone reminded me that…
/r/seduction12/10/25 01:07 PM
2

The general overall structure is: Open Transition Manage the group (if applicable) Attraction (humor + intrigue + buying temp) Flirting (humor + light/playful interest) Emotional Connection Escalation You start in playful and then gradually move to more serious as you approach stage 5/6. Stage 5 is a combination of confident sexual tension + playful interest which is already helping you move away from general humor/pure playful vibe. By the time you get to stage 6 you're ready to connect emotion…
/r/seduction12/10/25 01:03 PM
1

Models is good for mindset but not for technique. If youre trying to learn to be playful, watch the comedian matt rife and try to hang out with guy friends who are good at fucking around and playfully teasing you. If you don't have access to those types of guys, learn a few funny sound bites to act as training wheels to help you with delivery and to help you get started. You can't lean on them forever, but they will give you a little bit of a boost to get you started. Try to infuse humor into AL…
/r/seduction11/10/25 11:24 PM
10

lol it doesnt work in english either
/r/seduction10/10/25 12:05 AM
1

No, but the overwhelming majority of them are or are nurse practitioners who make even more than RNs
/r/seduction09/10/25 10:43 PM
2

This is the correct answer.
/r/seduction08/10/25 10:36 AM
4

no, the ASIANS, not the valley girls lol. But yeah, i get what you mean. Born and raised there
/r/seduction08/10/25 07:02 AM
10

Man if you think asians in SF are hot, wait until you see the asians in LA lol.
/r/seduction08/10/25 06:57 AM
1

lol are you seriously going to call everyone who disagrees with you a loser who doesn't love himself?
/r/seduction08/10/25 06:21 AM
0

Bingo. Crazy high crime rates. LA too. That plus the closing of all the stores.
/r/seduction08/10/25 12:08 AM
19

The main issue isnt the number of tech bros, it's that the number of attractive women is VERY low because attractiveness and career focus/education tend to be roughly inversely proportional. The 1600 SAT girl (or guy) is rarely also the prom king. But its not as bad as say, rural west virginia, unless you're trying to date someone very attractive. Then it's tough. Day game in SF is kind of dying out though. All the traditional locations to day game are pretty dead now.
/r/seduction07/10/25 11:49 PM
0

lol cool story bro
/r/seduction07/10/25 10:37 PM
8

You probably DONT know the theory by heart. Every time i talk to a guy who says this, i ask him a few questions and he quickly realizes he's read a lot, but doesnt actually know a lot of basic fundamentals. If youre not approaching 20-50 women per week, that should be your first priority. It's like asking why am i not losing weight going to the gym once a month and eating like garbage?
/r/seduction07/10/25 09:04 PM
1

If you're asking about "chasing" you clearly didn't read my comment carefully.
/r/seduction07/10/25 08:20 PM
1

lol many of my students do about 200 approaches in a MONTH, not a year. Standard advice is that you need 20-50 interactions per week in order to get better. Remember, youre not doing approaches right now to find your dream girl. You're doing approaches to GET BETTER AT INTERACTING WITH WOMEN. Focus on process, not outcome.
/r/seduction07/10/25 08:42 AM
2

Not one comment about how pissed Rogue is gonna be that Remy is cheating?? I'm disappointed, guys.
/r/seduction07/10/25 07:33 AM
2

Thanks man, but I'm sure i have PLENTY of cringey shit from 20 years ago haha :D In the 2000s era I was a fairly new coach so I mostly taught MM because that was who i studied under when I was a student. It took a few years of experience before I started coming up with my own individual style, though even that's changed a lot throughout the years (as it should). I never really identified as a "guru" because even then i thought it was all ego bullshit. At the first convention/conference I ever he…
/r/seduction07/10/25 07:03 AM
7

"dont ever double text" is the 2025 version of 1996's "wait 3 days after meeting her to call." In other words: bad advice Women are CONSTANTLY complaining about guys who arent persistent, get butthurt whenever she gets busy or misses a message, or gives up at the first sign that she isn't head over heels for him. Super unattractive. That doesnt mean be needy, of course, but the rule I give my students is: First time she doesnt reply to a text, wait 1-2 days and text back, but do not acknowledge …
/r/seduction07/10/25 05:00 AM
2

It's a bit gamey, like too playerish. It's not horrible, but it comes off fuckboy-ish, esp in 2025. And if you don't SEEM like the player stereotype, it then seems like youre TRYING to be a player, which is way way worse. Similar to how cringey it is when asian guys with 4.0 GPAs try to act like black gang members and youre like "dude, you cant take AP Calc and have a 1600 SAT and be gangster."
/r/seduction07/10/25 12:08 AM
2

Ok some general tips for night game: * Unless you're approaching direct, don't introduce yourself unless she does first, and most of the time women won't do this. * Situational or environmental is the smoothest way to open, but usually only makes sense if you're opening someone in immediately proximity, AND it requires a fair amount of creativity. * I don't know what kind of "push pull line" youre using to open, but if you can let me know ill tell you if it's good or not. FYI most of them are NO…
/r/seduction06/10/25 10:54 PM
2

Questions (even interesting ones) are not routines. They're questions. Questions arent necessarily always bad, but if the girl isn't invested in the conversation, questions very quickly seem like youre trying to interrogate her or obligate her to talk to you. Try not to ask the woman to carry the conversational burden for you by asking her a ton of questions and hoping she does the heavy lifting.
/r/seduction06/10/25 10:39 PM
5

Almost everyone from back in the day is retired. There's a new crop of guys on the scene but haven't met any of them. That said, I've been really impressed with what i've seen of u/gusolsen's stuff so far. And u/hunterpua and u/friendlywrenchilling both have fantastic content here on this sub that are clearly indicative of actual experience in the field. Unfortunately neither are NYC based though.
/r/seduction06/10/25 08:47 PM
3

fuck, okay let me get you a more suitable reply for nightgame later today.
/r/seduction06/10/25 03:03 PM
3

Good job getting out there and opening, man! I'm not sure if you're opening during the day or night, but it sounds like day time (if im wrong let me know) so here's my advice for that: Don't open with push pull. Its weird and gamey and comes off disingenuous, like youre a prank youtuber. If youre stopping someone on the street, open direct from behind with, "hey excuse me..." (she turns around) "i saw you and you are absolutely adorable and i had to come meet you. I'm <your name>" and then shake…
/r/seduction06/10/25 02:53 PM
4

hahaha thanks man. To be fair, my username here is "becomesharp" so he probably didn't put it together.
/r/seduction06/10/25 02:32 PM
10

Your bitterness is showing. The only thing you got right here was his name. That's not his story at all. He was NOT a virgin, he was a pretty normal, chill guy who wanted to get better with women and got good pretty quickly. And he didn't leave because of religion or disliking pickup. He left because he got everything he wanted out of pickup and wanted to pursue his passion of writing, which he was very talented at. And he doesn't write (almost at all) about relationship advice. His last 3 books…
/r/seduction06/10/25 02:30 PM
7

Dude RNs in LA make 120-150k, some even more if they have more advanced degrees. That's not wealthy but it's a pretty decent paying job.
/r/seduction06/10/25 11:14 AM
1

I dont know these guys at all, so have no dog in this fight, but if they didn't clearly disclose that the deposit was non-refundable, you should consider doing a chargeback with your credit card company. Scummy practice that makes the entire industry look bad.
/r/seduction06/10/25 09:52 AM
1

Some are rebranded pickup guys, some aren't. I know a lot of coaches who had nothing to do with pickup.
/r/seduction06/10/25 09:47 AM
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