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captainchippsixx Archive

View 2 posts and 2,278 comments by captainchippsixx on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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5

You can always bring it up In court if it happens. They have not be Working in good faith your honor. We were very close to an agreement to avoid using the courts time…….. You cannot play fair. A lot of guys take the high road and get slammed in the end.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 07:25 PM
1

You will have to hold her to the fire that she needs to come up with half the expenses for the house. Do you make. Ore Money then she does? You may be on the hook for alimony. You could negotiate that you will eat the money if no alimony or you keep a certain significant asset. Don’t show your cards on what you really want. Poker face. But you should be a 100% business dog now and cut her off.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 11:59 AM
2

Add clauses to agreement . She is responsible for all expenses, taxes. cohabitation clause can be done as well.
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/24 10:21 PM
4

It’s time to be a dick with what you can do. Kill all streaming service/. Take her off cell plans. Make her get her own car insurance. You have to go hard at this. She thinks you will just cave and pay. So far she is right. You can tell her we can work together or I take this route. You demand money back in the asset division if you can show she is not paying anything and has income. Here are her emails and texts.
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/24 10:15 PM
1

Does she work?
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/24 10:10 PM
4

See the lawyer. Sounds like you’re talking about $5k she is avoiding. You can sue her in small claims court as well. Look at your options .
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/24 09:16 PM
2

That depends if you have to pay her alimony and if you have kids. If yes to both it sucks. You will have to write a budget for your household minus if you have to pay. The killer in a budget is the 1-2 things that happened that are one times. Car repair, excise tax, dentist bill, new phone, etc. you have to plan for $$$ for these every month.
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/24 05:57 PM
3

Call the cops on her and get her arrested. Stop Being nice and trying to not cause trouble. Talk to your lawyer!!!! Possibly Talk to cps. Have you not brought this up.
/r/Divorce_Men11/11/24 07:49 PM
1

Does she work and have access to insurance.
/r/Divorce_Men11/11/24 07:47 PM
5

Sounds like you should reaffirm custody with you with a lawyer. I advise going to a counselor with your son.
/r/Divorce_Men11/11/24 07:47 PM
2

Just have her served. Nothing left to be said. It’s time to be a dick (that’s what she will say and then you know you’re doing it right). Ignore her. Be indifferent. But…… you should have the accounts and credit cards on lock down. Be ready to record any interactions as well. Could get ugly quick. Are you sleeping in an another bedroom?
/r/Divorce_Men11/11/24 07:44 PM
4

You need a file police reports man. That way you can get primary custody. You should be able to pull up her purchases as well if alcohol. You need to be a cold hearted dick and see a lawyer and have all the evidence ready to go. You can’t be nice anymore. You need to prove 100% she is a danger to the kids. You do not warn her or tell her what you are doing. You plan should be to have her move out and you stay in the house with kids. My dad was an alcoholic and I was in the car when he got pulled…
/r/Divorce_Men11/11/24 07:39 PM
5

Nice guy. Flush that attitude down the toilet man. Be indifferent to her. Get divorced!
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/24 06:20 PM
-2

Well all I will say is most women like to be somewhat dominated. After I was done with the marriage the ladies are more rowdy and like it rowdy. Also women that have had kids aren’t as tight so it can be difficult to have the happy ending. First time in awhile… if you married game was vanilla. Maybe it wasn’t. Then disregard. -Be vocal- they like to know it feels good -Maybe not spank her or pull her hair yet, but don’t be gentle on her butt. -Tell her what position you want to transition to. Do…
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/24 06:19 PM
5

Stop being nice. See a lawyer. Go through her phone and if you need the evidence or hire a PI.
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/24 03:02 PM
3

I would call your family and her parents and tell what she did.
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/24 08:48 PM
4

Get a lawyer asap and demand 50% be returned. Then change the locks in the house and make sure you have all the keys to your car. Cancel credits as lost and lower credit limits today. Change your direct deposit. Remove her from any accounts you can.
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/24 05:58 PM
0

Agree. If she loved and respected you she wouldn’t treat you poorly.
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/24 05:43 PM
2

1- you have to lead. Dump the ask her questions and being nice. Now you say “ok this is what we are going to do! We either try to fix it or I end it.” Before you say that see a lawyer. And prepare for divorce. When you are ready then say pick an option. If she stalls just moved forward with divorce. Now if you have a dead bedroom as well, then the question is how is she getting by. Women that are not into the marriage usually is a sign they are looking for your replacement, or is testing a new g…
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/24 05:42 PM
3

The better to go at it is side hustle when You don’t have the kids. I prefer under the table but you can make good money Uber eats or door dash. Do the kids like spaghetti ? That’s a decent low price meal with some veggies. Make a pizza for them with stone fire crusts rather than order out.
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/24 05:32 PM
9

That means that what time alone to talk and meet up with the other guy or guys. Space = monkey branch activated
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/24 12:09 AM
7

You need counseling and a doctor bro. Get checked out. You’re not evil. You’re dealing with deep shit.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/24 11:49 PM
3

Where is she getting it from then? The sex. Usually no sex can mean cheater. You’re not listing any basic cheater signs. Or she has no drive - medically. You should absolutely see a lawyer and not tell her. I would go to the edge with it and then say look if we can’t fix this I’m out. I guarantee she will go either batshit on you or cry and blubber . My money is on batshit. But that is why you have to be 100% ready. Know all the assets and debts. Can you be primary caregiver? If she makes more y…
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/24 08:04 PM
3

Hey man. Being passive and she will walk all over you. She is laying down an ultimatum. She thinks you’re weak. I doubt this is the first Ultimatum from her. What you should do is see a lawyer. Take her threat seriously and start looking at your assets and finances. What you should say to her is obviously you don’t love or respect me to speak to me this way and threaten me. This is not what a partner does.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/24 07:55 PM
21

Just dump her man. She showed her true colors after how long? Yeah peace out. Avoid single moms for relationships!
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/24 04:21 AM
3

The only way you stop people is to keep hitting them with consequences till they learn. You could get a protection order as it sounds now. Weigh your options. But always call the police like you did. Judges take this as the best evidence!
/r/Divorce_Men07/11/24 03:43 PM
7

You don’t tell her anything. Just take your actions. She moved out. Stop stop stop being a freaking nice guy. See a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men07/11/24 03:26 AM
2

You need to get primary custody and do what ever it takes to ensure it. By proving that she is unfit to do so. Don’t fuck around and find out. Time to lead this divorce and kick ass. Protect your kid and yourself. It’s all business now - so you new name is business dog! She has already shown you what she is capable of on the crazy scale and it could go worse. You’re very very very lucky that those police calls vindicated you. Don’t fuck around. Lawyer lawyer Lawyer. A kick ass one.
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/24 03:45 PM
3

She was using you in case it didn’t work out that with other dumbass. She could have said it was yours. Now she is going be an old ass mom and eventually that dude is going to bail and cheat. They all do. You’re in your prime! Start kicking ass and stack the assets man!
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/24 03:42 PM
1

You can transfer the 401k with a special form usually citing divorce. Do you have to give her more than the equity? Can she refinance? Does she have a job? I would keep the 401k. If you sold the house you pay realtor fees and have to fix it up. So your half would be less today.
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/24 03:38 PM
2

The house money depends on equity. I would negotiate the equity - the realtor fees and split that- because if you sell the house you’re going to pay 6% in fees. Are you staying the house? How is she going to take care of the kids going to school full time?
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/24 12:23 AM
5

Too too too risky 1-Longer you stay the more alimony can be. 2- you get lulled and she begins to siphon off assets and spending increases. 3- she will step out and date. You will be funding it and watching the kids. You then have to cover for her? Mommy is working late again….. 4- just when you think it’s okay, boom your served, assets frozen and your accused of abuse. Police called and locked out of your house. Read it hear all the time unfortunately. 5- are in you in a at fault state? 6- she d…
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/24 01:15 AM
3

File a claim and go down to the police to file a report. I would tell ex you are working with Apple and the police to locate the iPad and that you are prosecuting it as a felony theft. Just to fuck with her.
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/24 12:20 AM
18

She can fuck off.
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/24 11:29 PM
4

No. You have to say fuck it. I would say fuck beating. Anything she wants just to the opposite. Be careful she seems like she would lie to get what wants.
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/24 11:28 PM
3

Lose the Nice guy. If your called a dick, you did it right. I would just say what it is. She a shop addiction. But you didn’t check her and say fuck that take it back.
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/24 08:30 PM
2

Dude. I only read the first part and did get the fuck out of there man. Lawyer. Even stupid 304 cult ex’s will want money so see lawyer and don’t say shit. Line it all up and move out when you tell her if you can. Peace out cultist.
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/24 04:53 PM
3

Stand firm man! Classic bulldozer tactic. I would give up the house but suppose she can’t refi? So sell it as is. She can get an appt. She is high on meth if she thinks she is getting $50k alimony. I guess you negotiate and say here is my one time offer, other wise we go to trial. Bulldozer her right back.
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/24 04:51 PM
4

Call your lawyer asap
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/24 01:17 PM
3

Unfortunately yes you have to go the divorce route. She doesn’t respect you. Be careful and protect your self. Crazy soon to be ex will make false abuse claims against them or the kids. Which gets you locked out of the house. So record your conversations. I would put a camera inside where you can go if she starts. Also they run up credit cards bills and empty accounts. So have defensive plan.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/24 08:51 PM
3

Women need to be checked when they are out line. The nice guy route is bull shit. She keeps doing it because she doesn’t respect you. tell her she needs to knock it the fuck off. We either have discussions and figure shit out constructively. Or you will make a different decision and I fix it. Which will be she becomes a single mom and lives with her parents. Because you’re not taking this any more. If you do it again you might as well pick up and drive out to your parents.
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/24 08:04 PM
1

You can face time the kids each day. You may do that already. If you live in a nice climate… could time to do some kick aZz outside shit. Mountain bike, regular biking, hiking. Or inside exercise.. whatever your interests l road trip to visit family or friend. Get your taxes ready? 😂 Maybe you are due a nice/happy purchase for your self - something you can use daily or often? Brainstorm ahead of time so you can make plans as needed.
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/24 04:20 PM
1

🤘
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/24 04:08 PM
3

I personally think you are not compatible at first read of a short paragraph. At this point I would advise 1- don’t beg here for a chance. You need to go forward as this is happening. Don’t sit back and get the shit beat out of you. I would strongly strongly advise a lawyer asap. You have custody and child support to worry about. Stand up for your self. If she has issues tell her This is bullshit. I have found if you stand up for yourself her tune will change. Right now she has no respect for yo…
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/24 03:09 PM
1

She needs consequences. Not sure what not knowing her. Post it on Reddit in am I overreacting or something anonymously. Then send her all the comments. Lol. Probably will make things worse. lol. Can you work with her parents to take some sense into her? Is there any leverage you have? Like you constantly do her favors for something? You can bring it to a halt. What age can your son decide who he wants to live with? That would be a good plan. I wouldn’t tell your son so he doesn’t slip up. But I …
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/24 01:24 PM
6

You should consult an attorney. Talk to 5 and see if any are a good fit. Don’t tell her you did any of this. You should come away with an overview for your states laws and how it will go. With a lot of money on the line it would make sense to hire one. You should plan for primary custody. If you have any emails or texts of your wife saying she hates the kids…. Print it out as evidence. If she is working and you make similar money you could avoid alimony. Unfortunately even though she is an awful…
/r/Divorce_Men28/10/24 10:11 AM
9

Dude be the leader. Get started on divorce. Protect your assets from money grab. Everything you’re saying is she is d8 One. The back and forth is she is worried about who is going to pay for her aZz. Seriously. It’s about getting you to foot the bill a little longer until she is ready to run.
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/24 11:01 PM
2

Dude cut the bank off now! It’s a guy she is sleeping with. Time to be a dick. You’re not being a dick but that is what she will say. It’s business dog mode.
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/24 02:31 PM
1

You should play the long game mate. Let her graduate and get a job. Then divorce. Unless she has along time to finish school. If you can’t wait it out….. then you should consult an attorney before spending more one on school. You’re going to be on the hook for child support and splitting the equity. 7 years probably alimony too.
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/24 02:26 PM
2

Is there an office? I would rather a mattress on the floor. I have a back issue as well. But don’t tell her what you’re going to do! Consult 5 attorneys, pick the best one. I would lean towards a female because they know the bullshit women play. Don’t say shit. Get everything lined up. Get your family for support. Then you drop it on her. Again don’t tell her how prepared you are. Just say we need to divorce , I can’t do this. She will show her true colors (80%). Either she goes with routine and…
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/24 02:22 PM
7

Just so you know- it can be amicable and then become a dumpster fire in a second. Listen to your gut. Look at her actions. Pay attention to the words she uses. Keep tabs /alerts on all accounts - including credit card. Usually they will tip their hand if they are going to turn it in to a shit show. Most guys are blindsided because they have work and kids your worries about. They miss the clues when dealing with the soon to be ex, even if in the same house. Does she work? Is there a large income …
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/24 01:36 PM
1

Wow what a cun!. What comes around goes around. She will get her dues. Stay positive that this will happen. And I warn you they always come back. 1 year, 5 years, 10 years- some time she will reach out. Then you say F off. Just don’t say a word to her on this. Not a hello. Nothing. Nada. Be indifferent. Don’t respond to questions just walk away. Do your good bye before you drop off. Be gone in 15 seconds.
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/24 01:34 PM
2

Is there anything you can give him?
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/24 01:29 PM
5

Man. Don’t give it all to her for fucks sake. Don’t let a cheater off the hook. You are a man and can rebuild! She has a job. You need to see a lawyer. 50/50 split but some assets you own before marriage may be protected. If
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/24 12:54 PM
1

WTF? Dude you need to take the lead. Never wait. She is just going to set you up for the fall. She is thinking how do I take all the money and assets and get him to pay me. Majority of the time sleeping? Let her do that somewhere else. Divorce and get primary custody. Tell her she should move out.
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/24 02:34 AM
3

Lots of good advice. But make sure you are able to protect yourself from false accusations. She is not going to want to pay you, and she will want the kids as primary custody if she can get away with it. So what desperate 304’s do is claim abuse, call cops, lock you out of house, get protection order. You need to have a plan to defend against it.
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/24 01:13 AM
6

Yes this is a good thing. This what have gotten much worse as the years progressed and sent you to an early grave. You supported her…… and she did not support you. Based on my own failures, you should have checked her hard when she first started to hit you with this bullshit. Has she ever shared how this manifested for her? (There has to be sonthing that happened before you).
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/24 05:01 PM
2

There is no trust with a pair of cheaters. It eventually blows up, can be a slow fuse. I am a firm believer in manifesting. So if that’s the most important thing you want to manifest? Go for it. But I think you can set your mind to something else more important.
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/24 11:07 PM
1

You don’t have to move out. But if she is evil she could make up a case for abuse to get you out. If you used money for the apartment then you can make a case that she owed 50% and that can come out of expenses that she can then pay for. Time to be a dick to her (you are not but that’s what she will say) . Time for 50/50. Starting hitting expenses . Cut streaming services, look at your car insurance and cell phone bill etc see if you can save some $.
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/24 08:17 PM
1

I would subtract the sellers fee if you sold it. If you are losing 5% to realtor - take off $12500 and then divide by half .
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/24 08:06 PM
5

I think you have mean it. Either she makes this change or you will make changes. You should consult an attorney to see how things are going to go. This will get her attention. Women won’t react unless they see you mean it. Other wise it’s just words. I assume there is other issues as well?
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/24 08:04 PM
6

Good advice. I would also know where every penny is and every penny owed. Put alerts on accounts. If you have any expensive hobby stuff i would slowly move it out with family or storage (if storage photo and catalog it just in case something happens) Won’t hurt to have a doorbell cam and another in main room. The biggest threat to custody is her making false accusations about you of abuse on her or your kid. Police get called your in deep shit if you no evidence to counter (like video). She coul…
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/24 06:43 PM
6

You need to see an attorney - ask how to get primary custody - because she is a threat to the children’s safety.
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/24 04:24 PM
2

That can support mental health then. Now you can kick aZz and stack assets. Focus on career. Go back to your old ways of sports and hobbies- but keep stacking assets/investments! Hit the gym and this will keep you in a good mental state.
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/24 01:17 PM
7

What you have been doing- hasn’t worked and never will. Now it’s time to do the opposite. No more communication or meetups. Only what is needed to finalize the divorce. She have any family?
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 10:20 PM
1

Wise to spend $. To prevent loss of money. Including alimony. Your state probably has alimony guidelines. But if she is working….. and the marriage was short. Again a lawyer would know. Call 5 and pick one.
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 08:49 PM
6

Print them all out. Have a nice binder to put them all in. Add any relevant notes like if she sent a text or made a phone call and why was said. Judges like hard evidence. Having a chronological binder with her bull shit is hard evidence. The more you can support her crazy character with evidence- the better off you will be. What Judges do not like! - threats and blackmail - especially if she is using the kids. Is she violating the custody or divorce agreement? Document those as well. Do not let…
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 08:46 PM
4

Bought before marriage, most states it’s all yours.
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 08:04 PM
1

Sounds like you should document everything and eventually file contempt in court. Or if something serious happens you talk to a lawyer first then call the cops and file a report. The only way she will learn is if you hit her hard and keep her down with the aid of the courts and police. She sounds crazy that she will falsify whatever. So it might be a long game. Print out all those texts or emails. Sounds like You could goad her into making threatening and blackmail statements and she seems to ha…
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 04:11 PM
5

Make your exit but don’t tell her ahead of time.
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 01:45 PM
7

Absolutely. Skip separation if you can and go right to divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 01:44 PM
26

Yep. Don’t be a fool and finance her cheating. Cheating comes with no respect or love. That’s what they want- they cheat and you still pay for everything. Drives me mad to read guys wanting to work it out when they know their wife is cheating. Bizarre
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 01:43 PM
4

Your approach has not worked. She does not respect you. Now it’s time to law down the law and check her bullshit. Tell her you’re in or you’re out. Things change today or she can be a single mom.
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 03:05 AM
3

Choose your path with conviction. My advice stands with divorce. Whatever move you make she is going to show her actions/colors. Make a move to force her to reveal it.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/24 10:41 PM
2

She already screwing another guy man. She is not the woman you thought she was. Consult attorneys on Monday. Get mad. Stop being a nice guy doormat. You can be hurt, I get it. But she took a big dump on you and is confident you are a weak guy and won’t defend yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/24 06:32 PM
3

Cheaters project onto their spouses. It could be she is using this as an excuse to cover her transgressions and to continue it. You have to be the leader now. Either start looking into divorce ……. or lay down the law. Her bullshit stops now. You are now going to go through her phone. If she continues her bullshit she will be upgraded to a single mom who is far away from her prime. She can become a pump and dump woman if that’s her wishes.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/24 06:29 PM
3

Yeah. There is another guy… or woman. What you should do: 1- consult a lawyer and no the landscape of how divorce will go. 2- put the clamp down on assets and debts. Investigate it all and put alerts on accounts. 3- whatever she is up to it’s on her phone - I’m 99% sure she is already up to shit. So if you need proof that’s where it willl be. Who paid for the dinner? Once I had divorce plan all set. I would ask her to move out. She is openly disrespecting you which means she doesn’t love you or …
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/24 06:04 PM
10

What comes around goes around. She will get her due justice. You can kick aZz and rebuild. And You will. Just go no contact with her as soon as you can. Don’t answer her calls and texts. . Don’t answer her emails. Block her and her family. Nothing. She will try to come back some day. Just tell her to fuck off. You are in your prime! You can get into good shape in 2 months!
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/24 04:17 PM
1

When is your lease up? Do you any family or good friends close by you can move in with for short term Like 3-4 weeks? Start knocking down bills- get rid of streaming services. Look at you cell bill. Look at your car insurance.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/24 01:09 AM
2

What is the age in your state that kids can decide where they want to live?
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/24 01:04 AM
5

You cannot be a nice guy any more. Now you pull out all the stops to crush her. any dirty laundry or information you have to use. Someone this evil has done dirty shit before.
/r/Divorce_Men17/10/24 06:24 PM
3

First she looks you as a weak man. You cannot ask her to reconcile when she treated you like shit and risked your life and your children’s with Covid. Wake the fuck up man- she looks at you as someone she used for resources and parent the kids while she fucked around. So embrace she is a 403. - consult an attorney - know where every penny is and owed. - call the parents on both sides and tell them your divorcing because she is a cheater. Don’t let her paint a picture of you being an abuser and l…
/r/Divorce_Men17/10/24 05:05 PM
2

Can you get a balance transfer 0% new card? Does she work? I would ask the lawyer but- it seems prudent to use the liquid cash to eliminate the credit card debt. If she takes half the cash she ain’t paying down any debt, I guarantee it. Maybe even use the remaining 9k in cash/stocks to reduce the personal loan debt.
/r/Divorce_Men17/10/24 04:16 PM
1

What a freaking shit show. She got fired from the marriage as well. I think it depends on your state: You should really consult an attorney.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 08:42 PM
2

Consultations usually are free. Depends on the state. My ex wanted to change things in our agreement that I said no. She threatened court. I consulted an attorney. They said no way a judge is going to approve any of her shit changes. That shut her down completely. Women always try to bulldoze you in divorce because they don’t respect you. Knowledge is powerful. I paid $0. Your soon to be ex has mental illness. Nothing is off the table for her in dirty tactics. Sitting and fucking around waiting …
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 07:59 PM
1

That’s great! Kick aZz man. Don’t forget to treat your self with a happy purchase every so often. Focus on building your career and stacking assets.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 07:23 PM
2

Fuck it man. Tell her to move out asap. Protect your assets. Consult an attorney asap.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 07:21 PM
3

My general advice Workout everyday it you can. Start small if you haven’t been doing it. Set goals and accomplish. In 2 months you will go holy shit. This will help your mental state at home either kids and at work. Pair with this making changes to eating healthier. Again start small if need be. Start a big to do/goal list. Daily, weekly, monthly. This includes finances, doctor, dental, correcting your beneficiary legal documents, Then start accomplishing. Join a hobby club, or a sports league. …
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 07:12 PM
1

They always come back. Just say no thanks when she does.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 06:16 PM
1

Staying together unhappy is the worst thing for your kid. You don’t want your kid to get older and fall into a marriage based on what she saw. So consult an attorney so you know how it will go. Then write the plan and work the plan. You should never give her a heads up until you’re ready to giver her the papers and possibly move out.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 05:50 PM
1

Dude. Recipe for a disaster. Should have never married man. It’s tough times that women show their true colors. She folded.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 05:26 PM
1

What i didn’t hear is …. what was determined the problem is? I know my ex blamed me and I went through a medical procedure to help. But it turned out it was her blood clotting disorder all those years. Your current approach is seen as weakness by her. If you want to have chance. You need be pissed at her. Say fuck it. When women want a divorce she doesn’t respect you. So now show her you don’t respect her and her behavior. Be the leader. Asking when she is moving out. Be indifferent. Go do stuff…
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 05:23 PM
14

Sounds like she monkey branched to another guy already. Time to walk away fast from her.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 01:04 AM
14

Come on man. Stop being a simp passenger in this. Take the lead. Assume divorce. Be a man and say fuck it. If she wants a divorce she doesn’t love you or respect you. You should talk a lawyer and be worried about asset and debt protection. I don’t want to read later that you say by while she schooled you with surprise after surprise how she forced you to move out, money was taken, floated abuse claims against you. When you fuck around and wait…. This is what happens. She knows what she is doing.…
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/24 09:23 PM
1

Doesn’t mean you can’t sue her or the guy civilly.
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/24 05:41 PM
1

Use protection and Dispose the protection!
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/24 01:39 PM
5

No. But I would get as many people as I could to write a character statement for you. Friends, relatives, neighbors, coworkers, managers. If a judge has to make a decision this epuld help. The more evidence you have the better. Do you have anything from her in email or text threatening you? Threatening to keep the kid from you. Anything that shows her in bad light of character.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 10:29 PM
1

Yes it’s hard. Night time with out the kids is gym time! Grocery shop time. Maybe good to do a side hustle under the table for extra cash. God knows the ex will want a cut if you make more money. Eat healthy. Start looking at maybe joining a club or a sports team. Biking (mt biking in suburb parks or other places is cool). Coed volleyball. Start brain storming.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 09:13 PM
2

Women threaten. Do you have a copy of the text or email of her threats? But the layer on credit card.
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/24 03:59 PM
1

You get mad. You work out and kick ass. You say fuck it. She doesn’t love you or respect you. You take care of you. You come back stronger and with lessons learned but to do that shit again. You make changes. Maybe job. Maybe state. Put everything on the table and weigh it. Maybe you do something once for yourself and buy something you use every day. Maybe it’s a car, or a phone, or whatever. You take small steps. You crank a to do list and for your day, the week, the month. The start accomplish…
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/24 02:45 AM
6

I’m shocked! Not really. This is what happens when you let the ex wlfe control the narrative. Tell them exactly what went down. Also, when a woman says that too you she has another patsy lined up. When they become unsure it’s because with the guy said I just wanted to pump and go or she started thinking what the hell am I doing for $.
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/24 12:27 AM
1

Are the kids coming over to the relatives house to stay over? If they are, that would be good for short term - 6 months- I don’t know about years. If you saying the kids wouldn’t stay over at relatives I would say no- get your own place. Now the other thing- if your scenario is your ex screwed you over with custody- I would definitely only do what you are supposed to get and not take a bunch of extra nights or weekends unless you can negotiate something out of it. What ex’s like to do is for you…
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/24 08:00 PM
9

Dude just meet for drinks or coffee first date. You can get out in a hour or less if need be.
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/24 09:29 PM
3

I advise : She pays 1/3 college you pay 1/3 college Kid pays 1/3 college. Also after insurance - require the expenses split 50/50. Not you paying all of it. She is going to want to the kids activities etc be split . Have an air tight clause on the house you are not repairable for it and all insurance, repairs, and expenses -- don’t take your name off the deed till it’s refinanced.
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/24 08:53 PM
1

Yes push it through. Take the lead.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/24 11:30 PM
2

Women scorned will go nuts. My advice is to line the divorce up and have a plan to move out immediately when you drop the news on her. But call her family so she has support. Takes a lot of planning. But if you f around and find out what she is capable of if you give her time…. Go the nice guy route and then you wake up and the cops are there and the accounts are empty. You know her best. Is she capable of trying to destroy you when pissed off? It is she going to go into despair?
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/24 11:04 PM
6

You have to force the issue. You don’t want to be half owner. What if she falls behind on payments- you’re still liable by the bank and your credit. What if she has a claim with insurance- you’re still tied to it. Then She will ask for $$$ for property taxes and repairs because your half owner. Bad bad situation I agreed to have the house sold when my son is 18. And had strict language in the divorce agreement that I am not liable for payments etc. I wish I would have forced the sale but ih well…
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/24 04:26 PM
3

Be ready for the tricksies. She will say one thing and then drop a hand grenade in your pants bro. Only trust legal documents. Her words are empty. Seriously. I would expect her to get you to pay her child support. It doesn’t matter how much money she makes man. If she is primary you pay child support. You should be requiring alimony and assets split - depending on how long you have been married. Just hold your cards- don’t tell her what you want. If she wants child support rain you say oh okay …
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/24 09:13 PM
1

Social media? You have to look at messaging apps and photos.
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/24 05:06 PM
6

Of course she is lying. Of course she agreed to a shitty deal for you. Of course she monkey branched to another guy. Take responsibility.for being a nice guy. Now, get a fucking real good lawyer man and if they need to hire an accountant to find the assets. So be it. Pull the offer off the table but get the shark first. Then get std tested.
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/24 02:43 PM
2

You need to file a complaint on the facilitator.
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/24 10:48 PM
1

You need this in writing and notarized. Probbly should have attorney draw it up so it has all the legal bullshit that this clears you from any and all regarding this asset. It’s a great deal for you. She’s stupid as fuck. Try to limit your withdrawal from the 401k. Can you get a 0% credit card balance transfer to take care of credit card bills? Or raise cash another way - maybe try to get the withdrawal from 401 to $10k.
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/24 10:01 PM
1

Clean? With kdis! Probably not man. Does she work and make similar money to you?
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/24 09:56 PM
2

Has she had any of the standard cheating red flags? Besides the going out nights which is a big one for mother of kids. Changed her code for the phone? Takes her phone with her everywhere. Shuts it down when you get close. Take phone calls out of the room. Take showers when she gets home? I can go on and on.
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/24 09:53 PM
1

Does she know it’s coming? Because she will ask for 50% and most states yes is split 50/50. Unless you can stall it to happens later down the road?
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/24 04:42 PM
1

You got to show up for the kids. Try working out after work to get a positive boost. Take the kids outside. If the kids know then tell her you want to have dinner with kids without her at times. Take the kids to dinner out. Tell her she can have the house if she buys you out and refinances it. Otherwise fuck off we’re selling it ( at the last minute say you will stay in it and buy her out- hold your cards man) Do you a lawyer? You have a lot on the line. How old are the kids? It’s time to be a d…
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/24 04:22 PM
9

Okay man. Tough talk. You need to see an attorney. Have a plan for what goes down in your state. You want 50 50 custody and no child support. You need to watch your money and debt. She checked out a while ago. Probably cheated during the partying phase with friends. She doesn’t respect you or love you. There is nothing to repair. Don’t let her spend family money on finding herself while cohabitating. You need to be indifferent to her. Talk about kids and household. You need to start splitting so…
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/24 04:09 PM
2

Ok. It’s time to do something. You cannot tell most women how you feel. That shit doesn’t work. It makes you look weak and they steam roller you. Instead you say she is going to go to the doctor and go on meds. She is going to do more. Starting fucking today. Her failure to be a good partner and parent …. you will make more decisions. I would call her parents and your parents. Let them know how bad she is. Control the narrative. If you have to show them the texts etc that she sends. Obviously th…
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/24 02:27 PM
1

If it’s not to court yet then stop the process and say no.
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/24 12:32 AM
5

No
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/24 01:30 PM
2

Start with consulting attorneys so you know what the picture looks like financially for your exit. write the plan And work the plan. Just take steps. Other steps you can take is to start looking at what you can do financially to protect assets, move some assets, make a happy place purchase for you (cause when you divorce you share the debt) like a car or truck you wanted instead of what she wanted you to had. You have to have a plan for protecting yourself from her shenanigans. Be the leader. Do…
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/24 12:23 AM
2

Document all negative parenting about her that you can that she offers up in the journal.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 03:34 PM
2

Usually it’s a form of blackmail for more money. You should journal all this when she sends it in email or text, take photos a s print it out. If you go to court the judge will not be happy if there is an implied threat that you giver her x or she withholds kids. That pisses them off. Do you have a divorce agreement?. Most the time you can file contempt if the agreement is not being adhered to. That means her as well. You can consult a lawyer. I did and he told me my ex can threaten court and sh…
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 03:31 PM
10

Time to walk man. She is showing you her true self. There is only a few events that women show there true colors to you when you need them to be with you or have your back. Here is the first chance and she failed. Or Postpone the wedding indefinitely and she how she reacts. Again it’s the big life events that they show there colors. Unfortunately most guys don’t see these until they’re married. Rough Job change, lose your parents, accident whatever ..:. A couple of these and your trusted gf or w…
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 03:28 PM
1

Consult an attorney. Alimony can be affected. Does she work and who makes more money? If you drag it out and if one of your parent passes, the inheritance has to be split in most states if you are still married. Me ex made sure she got that, but I know she would she told me to fuck off if it was reversed.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/24 08:54 PM
7

Shut off the wallet man.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/24 07:51 PM
12

The point is get a freaking lawyer asap and don’t do anything she says. Let the lawyer tell you what is what.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/24 07:49 PM
7

Dude. You have made mistake after mistake. Time to jettison her and be done. Advice is to tell her to leave and finish the divorce this time. If you dumb enough to reconcile do it after the divorce is final.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/24 07:48 PM
2

Sounds like you are on the hook for child support and alimony. Just remember you have to taxes and she does not. Steer the $$$ amounts to a monthly amount. Mine tired to get Part of every paycheck and I said hell no. Be careful on the life insurance clause and don’t let her off the hook on it on her end. How is she going to help with college? Don’t be surprised if she tries to saddle you with all the extra expenses on top of the medical and dental. I advise writing a budget for you living somewh…
/r/Divorce_Men30/09/24 09:34 PM
23

I would believe you 100% if you said there have been no red flags, she doesn’t guard her phone, I know the passcode, I have checked it, she doesn’t take girls trips or girls nights, she doesn’t go shopping and gone for the whole day. She doesn’t talk about other men, she doesn’t have any guy friends, she never satays for work late, she never gone on business trips. I hope you are right. Women plan leaving way in advance. They monkey branch to a new guy before leaving. They squirrel away money an…
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/24 06:40 PM
2

Maybe research it. See what professionals say. You might want to read more stories before bed and just stay with him a little bit so he can fall asleep. The. Gradually change it. Maybe a reward chart? Does he have a night light?
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/24 01:43 PM
2

If you haven’t been married long screw alimony. You should consult an attorney to get the facts how it looks based on years of marriage in your state.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/24 01:38 PM
8

If it was reversed she would steam roller you. Take your 50% and make her pay alimony. If you make deal, I agree that would be better for you (if no kids). But don’t make it a bargain basement. That was 20 years of shit.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/24 01:36 PM
13

Usually means she monkey branched to another guy. My guess is about 80% chance. You should look into that. Now the advice. Say fuck it. Don’t try for her anymore. You can have your internal struggle. But you should show indifference to her. Only talk about your kid etc. You should hit the gym/do hobbies/ work Side hustle instead of hanging around with her. No more talking. Clamp down on assets. Don’t Try to win her back
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/24 04:18 PM
9

Yep. She “gets angry” and cheats man. Except it’s probably an act or excuse. Hit the eject button. 1- consult lawyers 2- come up with plan to get at least 50/50 custody. And protect your assets. Liars and cheaters don’t stop with the courts man. They keep on doing both. Call your family when you are ready to serve her. Call her parents right before you do. Let them know how she has been and your done. Don’t give her money. Don’t give her shit. Ask her to move out. This is not the time to fuck ar…
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/24 01:41 PM
3

Use your credit card and hire a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/24 07:46 PM
1

Bullshit. He just says the truth. We know who the lair is. It’s her. Her character sucks. Judges aren’t stupid
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/24 04:39 PM
2

Dude. Get a lawyer. Consult and then take action.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 05:48 PM
3

Okay man. Tough talk. Lose the get back together feelings fucking right now! This is what is hurting you in all aspects of this and she knows this! Stop it. Reduce your communication to kids or important things. Fuck her. You have to flip the switch. Say fuck it. Now treat this as a business deal and fight for time with kids. Do you have a lawyer? If she is heartless, she doesn’t love you or respect you. It’s over man. She thinks you are weak doormat and you are saying you are in this oost with …
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 05:35 PM
4

Well. Stbx. Means the divorce instant final? Is she being an asshole over the process? If she is being uncooperative on anything or trying to screw you over? Was she unfaithful? This would all weigh on me. Do you have a lawyer? If any of that is true, I would ignore her requests and not respond. Or tell her you will gather them all and send them to her parents. Lol
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 05:31 PM
10

Time for an aggressive lawyer man. So much at stake here. Don’t play the fuck around and find out what she is capable of. They all play dirty when it comes to divorce. She could call the cops, empty accounts, rack up bills, lock the assets up, on you etc. don’t sit around and wait. Move forward with divorce- fuck separation I f you can. She wants you out because she has guy plans and she wants child support and alimony. Heed this warning man! You want 50/50. That will give some free time to rech…
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 05:19 PM
2

Hahaha. It’s takes years to trust a woman. Many many years. First thing I thought was … did he cheat or was she the cheater? You would be surprised how often women make the husband. The villain when in fact they are telling a total fabrication of events. I wouldn’t be in an exclusive relationship with her. Date her is fine.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 09:57 PM
6

She will continue to try to bull doze you Brice your not telling her to fuck off with the stupid requests. Call some attorneys, consult with one so you have a clear picture of what a judge will like to see. Don’t have anything in text or email with her blackmail threats? Judges hate that!
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 12:28 AM
5

Don’t clarify. Just deny it ever happened. This may get her to act out in court Is she on any meds? Is she diagnosed with issues?
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 11:55 PM
17

Watch army of darkness! They think they killed the hag. Right before someone checks to see if she is dead. Bruce Campbell says “wait, it’s a trick.” And of course she gets up and starts fighting again. That’s what you have here. It’s a trick. Do not sit down and talk unless you have a way to protect your self with a witness or video.
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 12:06 AM
6

You’re better off paying for an attorney with credit card. She is absolutely hiding that money. She is trying to bull dozer you into this .
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/24 05:28 PM
2

Take he back to court- Consular an attorney. If she has had a significant change in income And makes more than you may be able to get the medical etc changed. You have to put your foot down and pay for only 1 cat. Let me guess, she doesn’t provide receipts?
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/24 10:44 PM
1

You should get her to admit shit in email and text. You should see a lawyer. Man my ex tried to bullshit me too. After the agreements years later she wanted a bunch of changes. I consulted and he said the judge is not going to change the agreement. She wants to give up nothing and gain- lawyer said I shouldn’t give her shit. She will loose in court.
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/24 09:53 PM
9

Yep. Just be ground and pound for now. Maybe friends with benefits. Keep it casual.
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/24 09:49 PM
7

File in court. Force the sale
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/24 04:54 PM
2

Gold is at an all time high bro. Take them to a jewelry store and see what you can get. Maybe 2 and then decide. They might not pay for the diamonds. Or maybe.
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/24 05:08 PM
3

You need to plan it out and not tip her off. You call your family for support. Right before you serve her you call her family and tell them why. The reason you do this is control the narrative. This helps avoid bullshit that can go sideways if you keep silent.
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/24 02:01 AM
6

Sounds like she wasn’t committed to marriage. Be happy you found out so young. It takes years to know woman. How do they handle life stresses events? Actions say everything. Be careful next time. Lot of women want to get there resource guy at 30, get the ring. Then it’s down hill.
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/24 05:26 PM
7

None of her business. If anything say she is not the only one I’m seeing. Lol
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 05:39 PM
1

I hope you have protections in place for you and your assets? Jilted crazy wives tend to almost always do a lot of these- these are all Common tactics. Have a plan to counter. grab as much money as they can make false accusations and call the police- claim physic abuse to them or the kids file for restraining orders and orders to freeze assets and get you legally kicked out of the house -break you stuff leave town with the kids to relatives and not let you see the kids Best thing you can do righ…
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 04:29 AM
1

If it’s not in the divorce agreement…. She is going to lose. This is a bulldozer tactic. Is there a clause to split misc or extra school Expenses?
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 04:21 AM
2

She is full of shit.
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/24 12:28 AM
7

The fix is get divorced man. You just sponsored her sausage carousel rides. I’m sure the kids have suffered under her care as well. Her actions say she is full Of shit. Just so you know, women plan 2 steps ahead. She could still Charlie Brown your ass if you are stupid enough to get back with her. It could be money troubles or set you up for a bigger fall.
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/24 06:56 PM
9

Do give her shit. The agreement is the agreement. I was told by a lawyer for myself that courts don’t like to change the agreement. My ex wanted a bunch of changes. My lawyer said she is fucked and they won’t do anything. Burning the other hand had a case on medical expenses.
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/24 04:16 AM
3

Begging and asking her to work it out never works. She doesn’t respect you. So now you say fuck it. But have to mean it. Be the leader. Push forward. A lot of times then they want to try once you say you suck as a wife. Then you have to set boundaries and not let her run the show anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/24 04:13 AM
14

Don’t let her come back! Pedal to the metal away from her.
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/24 09:11 PM
8

You should have blocked her man. You should even know this or care. Block her on your phone too.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 09:46 PM
1

Yeah no mate. Not a good plan. Time for her to permanently ass from the past.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 05:56 PM
20

She didn’t take her share of accountability then and blamed you for everything. I’m all for owning your shit but standard practice by women is to say none of it’s their fault. Sounds like you need some counseling man.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 05:39 PM
3

Just don’t get into a relationship. You hold the keys to this dept. and use protection!
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 05:06 PM
3

Block her on all communication apps man. She is a cheater, liar, and just a bad person. You don’t need that ever again.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 05:04 PM
6

Yep. The fuck it phase it real. I said it out loud to my ex. I became businezz dog and indifferent. Focus on myself and the kids. Then lo and behold she starts to waffle. Too late and why would sign up for another shit tour of duty.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 03:45 PM
1

What’s her motive? Is Washington an at fault state? Is she mentally unstable?
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 07:22 PM
1

Alright man. This is tough advice. But you need to stop fucking crying. Never be beg or simp after a woman. She doesn’t love you or respect you. Say fuck it! I’m done! She is running the show and you are letting her! Stop being a nice guy. What women do respect is when you say fuck off and mean it. You’re a shitty wife because of x,y, z. The sooner I get out her the better. I don’t want my kid seeing this shitshow of a marriage. You do look fat in those jeans! She also lied to you so much and yo…
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 04:03 PM
3

If you’re 100% sure you don’t need to go……. Wouldn’t waste my time. I would put on my social feed it’s been a damn good day. Breaking the chains! 🎵🤘(Dokken)
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 03:53 PM
3

My guess is your soon to be ex ignores your kids at some level. Whatever patterns you saw before you left with her (lack of engaging with kids and on her phone or something like that) has probably increased.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 03:07 PM
1

Good job. Yes control the offensive. Keep the high ground and hold it by setting the divorce pace. I always joke around to sell all the beds when she is out answering out a mattress on the ground. Start smoking (pretend) stink cigars, empty beer bottle around and make it so she doesn’t want to be there.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 01:53 PM
1

Oh okay. That info changes my % from 50% to about 95% she already has a guy in the wings.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 01:51 PM
6

She is going to be a complete fing shitshow. Don’t answer the door when she coming knocking!
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 01:27 AM
9

Yep. You are better off now knowing she is not who you thought she was. women can hide their real persona for a long time. They also plan their moves out. I also know that most women are good with leaving when they monkey branched to another guy already. So unless you did a deep dive In Her phone it’s not out of the question.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 01:25 AM
17

You’re being a huge dumbass. You need to learn from your mistakes. She could have given you a std? WTF man? She is a liar and a cheater. So you don’t Talk to her unless it about kids. You need to focus on being a father and yourself. No women. And look who wants to move your kids. You need to wake the fuck up. She is a single mom and I would be surprised if a dude wanted to marry that cheating trainwreck. She must be a good actress and at lying. Btw. You think that was she first time she cheated…
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/24 05:14 PM
2

I would be prepared to say I keep my money and I won’t ask for alimony. But we split any other major shared assets.
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 10:32 PM
8

Focus on the divorce business until you get the divorce done! Are there kids involved?
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 09:13 PM
1

Side hustle is the way to go - under the table. Is there any hobbies, sports, mechanical or specialty niche knowledge you have over a majority of the public. Or look at your area you live in, what does everyone need or is popular there. Let’s say you love fly fishing. You could look for equipment on marketplace, negotiate it down to buy. Then resell it. Most people want to get rid of stuff as soon as possible. I live in a large city with a lot of universities. Anytime there is wood dining chairs…
/r/Divorce_Men06/09/24 01:15 PM
6

You need to look at renting a room- roommate situation.
/r/Divorce_Men06/09/24 04:58 AM
2

Why wait for 1-2 years? Do you make equal salaries? You should pay to consult an attorney to get a justbof your states laws and if there is a difference in pulling the trigger sooner rather than later. What is causing the divorce plan between you?
/r/Divorce_Men06/09/24 04:54 AM
13

Man. You need to change. Be indifferent. Never beg or simp after your wife to stay married. If she wants a divorce she does not respect you or love you. I read a little of previous posts. It sounded like she wants to control the situation. She is kind of a shitty person from what I read. No accountability, gave your ring back, calls you a narcissist. That’s just the highlights. You’re taking the high road and that never works out. She knows what she is doing, she is bad. You should put daylight …
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/24 01:35 PM
21

You should give no fucks about her. Your divorced. I would forward them to her parents and see if she continues to send those types of messages. Send her parents this: Hope you are well. Here are some funny messages from your daughter. Regards
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 09:33 PM
3

Trying to understand. Why does she hate you? What brought the marriage to an end?
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 09:27 PM
4

Seriously? Living together already. Someone that does just wants to use the other for resources. Not sure which one, your ex or the douche. Never beg again to fix a relationship. Always walk away. It’s a game changer.short circuits them. Only 2 scenarios - 1- show up late and make it a hit and run. Meaning just do the cake and leave- call her later as well and do face time. 2. Or don’t go and do your own thing with her? Do you have family nearby. How old is she?
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 07:57 PM
2

Seriously? Living together already. Someone that does just wants to use the other for resources. Not sure which one, your ex or the douche. Never beg again to fix a relationship. Always walk away. It’s a game changer.short circuits them. Only 2 scenarios - 1- show up late and make it a hit and run. Meaning just do the cake and leave- call her later as well and do face time. 2. Or don’t go and do your own thing with her? Do you have family nearby. How old is she?
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 07:53 PM
3

Cut her off from you and see the lawyer. Stay on the offensive and break the chains man. You can’t focus on the marriage failing part now. What you do today will dictate how shitty or good the rest of your life will be. Let her stretch out the bullshit and you are subsidizing her dating and whatever. She doesn’t love you or respect you. Time for you to say “ I’m already gone!”🎵 Look it sounds like she has outside influence on her life- what you typed screams I like this other guy I started an af…
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/24 09:13 PM
5

Hey man. I’m in my 50’s and very similar situation in regards to the work and money, my kids are great but yeah the $. I feel the stress from all directions. Only difference is I work a side hustle for some extra cash. And my gf is great. My ex can’t get hired (because people don’t like her) and she had packed on 20lbs and has medical issues now. So the her getting remarried outlook sucks and easing my alimony is not happening. Work for me in the biggest issue. I want a different job but need th…
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/24 08:49 PM
3

Then don’t marry her. You shouldn’t be even thinking about it after a 1+. Dude! Come on. You don’t even know her. You sure as heck don’t know her family. What hard times and stressful life moments have you been with her to see how she is? Well we know she failed the prenup test. Be the leader and just say okay we will not get married. She what she does.
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/24 04:55 PM
3

99.9% of the time it’s a bad idea. Are you sure she is not playing for resource extension?
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/24 04:51 PM
11

First thing I thought my of was what kind of dumb ass dates a cheater…. I bet he has no fucking idea what she has done. I hope this guy asks you what happened so you can laugh and say she is 304 man. Or if they marry does it help you out of alimony?
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/24 05:08 PM
3

Everyday except when I have to work at night once a week. Now one in college. I barely get her to message me. lol.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/24 09:24 PM
1

What does the agreement say? M she has to stick by that or you she is in contempt. You would have file against her.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/24 04:34 PM
2

You need to make a decision man. Don’t buy a house until you figure it out and wait till the baby is born. You’re only 25. You got married too young. I would consult an attorney while you can. Obviously you’re on the hook for child support. But a short marriage you should be just that and asset split. That’s why don’t bother with buying a house. Maybe talk to your dad as well. It is not going to get any better man.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/24 04:32 PM
5

Nope. Have everything lined up. She will still do the dirty tactics you predict will happen. If you warn her they start earlier and she can really crush you if she makes accusations, police, steal assets, tell you family bs etc.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/24 03:10 PM
1

Look what you are showing your kids man! This is insanity. They know everything. Your boys don’t see a leader or a stoic man. You should tell them don’t be like me. Or start today- be the leader. Say what you mean and do what you say. Your wife doesn’t respect you at all either. One step at a time man. You need to consult a lawyer to know the land for your state. It’s takes money to protect money and assets. Do you have any siblings you can get support from. So step one is consult! Consult consu…
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/24 01:41 PM
12

Who gives a shit. Get the divorce. This is a tactic and I bet it’s still somehow to screw you over. In the movie Army of Darkness (fantasy comedy) they think they kill the witch hag. But Bruce Campbell warns the guy before he checks her “it’s a trick” and she jumps up and starts her attack again. This is what you have going on right here! Also, 80% of women want no part of a guy that is only separated.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/24 01:34 PM
5

Exactly. “Oi, fucking cunts.”
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/24 03:12 AM
7

Usually a Signed divorce agreement -Judges don’t really want to change. She had her chance and she signed off on it. You should just pay a good lawyer $500 and ask them to make sure.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/24 09:08 PM
5

When you have wife with that personality….. You have to be ready in all aspects of divorce , literally handing her the papers with a family member present, have contingency plans for the worst case scenarios, and where are you going to live. It needs to be a complete surprise and keep her on the defensive. Otherwise she will think of a bunch of ways to hurt you via accusations? Police, the kids, your work……. Break your stuff.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/24 02:47 PM
6

Only one way to go man. Break the chains and walk away. Obviously wait for the dna. But start securing your finances and assets!
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/24 01:46 AM
3

Keep the high ground and set the pace. Don’t sit back and react to her.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/24 01:44 AM
1

It’s time to brainstorm. Do you have any leverage? Any info you know that she would never want to be known. What is her priority for herself? Social media, shoes….? Do you have a lot of family? Family that may be in government positions? You have to look at all the angles. But also that including giving her something. Which could mean getting a deal notarized and lawyer approved. What I’m saying is, you know your enemy. She is never going to stop doing what she does. Unless you turn the tables o…
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 11:13 PM
1

I would ghost her. If the marriage isn’t legal she can fuck off. Move out, transfer job, just get away.
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 10:12 PM
4

Well you should prepare for it and get a lawyer asap. Don’t fuck around and find out. Retainers can be refunded if something changes. The worst thing you can do is sit around a wait and beg her! The best thing you can do is to take the lead. Get the lawyer. Ask her when she is moving out, when to talk to the kids, don’t want to wait too long. Etc. Her actions are not of love or respect. And if you simp and wait she will steam roll you in all aspects. So there is a good chance she is having an af…
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 10:11 PM
7

My man. With a professional liar and cheater you don’t tell them what you’re going to do! 1- you should get a lawyer and say nothing 2- do what lawyer says to protect your self. Ask lawyer if they can recommend a divorce accountant if you have substantial assets. Trusts can be created. Assets can be gifted etc. 3- you line up up everything- especially where are you going to live. 4- you get support from family- show evidence as needed 5- right before you serve your wife call her parents and tell…
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 10:01 PM
2

It’s sounds like a good plan. I would stay and confront her with friends . I would call her parents when she is being served -put daylight in her nastiness. Don’t let her put a bunch of lies out there. Keep the high ground. If you can antagonize her to do things on camera when she is angry- especially if she slaps you- call the cops. If you want to make the home unfriendly legally.. You could sell the master bed or Donate it. Clean house and set up a weight bench in the living room. Get rid of t…
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 03:48 PM
6

Yep you reached the fuck it phase which is great. You can keep moving away from her 1 step at a time. She can be a single mom.
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 03:16 PM
3

Fins herself means ride the sausage. She wants to be a single mom with 5 kids lol! Are you sure she doesn’t have an affair brewing?????? Women make a move a lot when they have a guy in batters box. You should call lawyers immediately! Call some and get recommendations. You need to know how it goes down in Utah. Her plan will be to take the house and get alimony and child support and probably not work. You should talk to your family and get support.
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/24 11:04 PM
7

Dude. She is two steps ahead of her move. Being nice leads to asking for something or distract you before she stabs you again. As the the butcher would say from the boys. 0i she’s a cunt. Do you have a cohabitation clause in your divorce agreement?
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/24 10:48 PM
4

If you’re divorced/. She has to hire a lawyer to do all that shit. Dose she have a lot of money? The best action is to hire a lawyer to address the blackmail attempt. Print out the texts or emails. Judges do not like extortion for kids time. Pisses most of them off. I would count out all her texts and emails and rewrite some notes on what happened and have it ready if you need it. If you have accurate dates and times and logs and emails and texts. It stands in your favor that you are organized/b…
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/24 04:57 PM
5

Document everything in a log with as much detail as you can date times and place. Who is present. Super detailed. Is there anything in writing, text? Probably not. So not much you can do right now. But when you do get the evidence you can group it with what your daughter says to you. I don’t know if you want to record your daughter’s statement that’s a lawyer question. Or get an order of protection. You really don’t want your daughter involved at this age though. So it makes it a shitty situatio…
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 03:50 PM
7

Just take small steps man. Small steps -Go to the gym at least 4 times a week. Even if it’s just do elliptical or treadmill. Do it for 1 week and see how you feel. It’s good to go at night to give you something to do. see your doctor about the depression. If you get something you can take small dose.
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/24 11:39 PM
10

She wants to keep power over you. You have to keep going and do the emergency custody. Once you show her normal bs won’t work time after time, she may change. Idk. Or she could play dirty. So be prepared. I would bet money she makes false accusations against you so speak to your lawyer about it.
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/24 09:01 PM
1

It’s best to have everything lined up- I mean everything. And then tell her. Before you do that if you can call your family and her parents and explain what’s going on. You might want to have a family member or friend at the house when you do it. Are you moving out right away or cohabitating? In general shit will go off the rails with her. You have to have contingency plans for that.
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/24 04:24 PM
2

I guarantee it’s about the new gf. But man you should keep that quiet for awhile. First start a log of issues with her with dates and times- what was said -and print out texts as needed. Just to have it if it gets worse and worse. Ask her why she thinks daughter has an issue now. My guess is your ex is lying about what broke up the marriage. Or she is sabotaging saying it’s too bad your going to dads, because we were going to shop for cloths or soso invited us to a bday party or whatever. And yo…
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/24 04:21 PM
1

Well based on what I read she is going to be shitty and probably keep the kids from you. So you need a plan for that with your lawyer. You should think about it and research the wording on talking to your kids. It’s going to suck and hurt. They are going to cry hard. You should have a family member there when moving stuff. Don’t over think it what can happen if she doesn’t like them .
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/24 07:50 PM
3

Do some happy shit for your self man. Even if you have to spend a little money. Hopefully on something you will use every day. How is the relationship with kids?
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/24 07:26 PM
3

Hire a lawyer. You need to know what happens in your state. Way too Much money on the line and if she is like most she will be pissed that you initiated and what more than what’s fair. Use the house as leverage, don’t just give to her. She is going to want half of everything including your 401k. Don’t telegraph your punches. Us the house to counter to save your 401K.
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/24 03:51 PM
5

You need to collect evidence of her not being fit to be primary custody. Does she have dui? Record her at home if legal in your state. Incriminating texts? Has alcohol affecting her retaining a job? You can definitely pull the credit cards bills with the purchases. Start building a case.
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/24 01:16 PM
1

One of my favorite movies is captain America winter soldier. Cap did what he had to do to save Bucky. It was the right thing to do: Good luck
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 10:47 PM
2

Dude. $500k in assets. - get a consult with a lawyer. Call 10. Hire the best. Your description of her she will try to destroy you. You have time it all. The kids know she is an alcoholic right. So you plan it all and don’t say anything. Once you have everything set, including where are you going to live…..then You talk to your family and then right before you tell her you call her family. Explain she is a raging alcoholic etc and unfortunately you can’t stay with her. Then You drop it on her pre…
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 10:12 PM
1

Dude. $500k in assets. - get a consult with a lawyer. Call 10. Hire the best. Your description of her she will try to destroy you. You have time it all. The kids know she is an alcoholic right. So you plan it all and don’t say anything. Once you have everything set, including where are you going to live…..then You talk to your family and then right before you tell her you call her family. Explain she is a raging alcoholic etc and unfortunately you can’t stay with her. Then You drop it on her pre…
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 10:11 PM
1

It’s not working. You’re barely Scraping by. You almost went to jail. WTF? If she succeeds you would be in jail. She is a liar and a cheater. And you’re saying your current plan is working? Do you have family? Do they know this about her? My advice is this: brainstorm with family. - gather the evidence and have it ready to go via mail and electronically. Multiple copies. - get with family for support - I would do through her lawyer. Look they either unfreeze the assets and we negotiate. Or I wil…
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 08:01 PM
1

It’s leverage. You have to figure out how to play it. She is evil. Brainstorm and see if anything else in your head comes up. What are her weaknesses? What makes her lose control. What does she not want anyone to know about? Does she take any meds for mental health? Has she ever been arrested? Is she addicted to alcohol or smoking? Does she do pot? She lie on her taxes? Someone took her tests? How along ago? And do you have proof? I would do something on social media . Start writing it and stick…
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 06:44 PM
1

You can still file complaints and go to court for a small fee. You can ask around and see if any one will do free legal work to help you. You can flip stuff from marketplace that you pick up for free ( I have experience in this) You can get a part time job at night. It’s time to brainstorm and research: Use any information as leverage you have against her. Call for a well being check on your children. You need to be a pain in the ass and not stop until she lets up. I’m pretty clever but you know…
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 06:07 PM
3

Okay you learned a lesson. She is a liar. Now but the amor on and grab a battle axe. Time for battle. You need to use anything against her as leverage from her past. No pulling your punches. Just no she has no problem lying and putting you in jail to get what she wants! Let that sink in.
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 05:41 PM
9

First off man. I would say there was a 99% chance She had another guy or in the wings. Sounds like she was in the affair fog and signed off on the divorce. I know guys don’t like to believe that there wife was a liar and cheater. But man it happens oh so often. What you wrote was in the playbook of a woman who decided to be with someone else and lie to you about it. this is on her, not you and she would have made it worse on you dragging it out. So you should be mad. I was like you, lost and did…
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 03:37 PM
1

Lawyer up man. Cameras and record. Do you have any evidence via text from her? If she hits you and leaves a mark. Call the cops. Don’t tell her your calling them ever.
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 02:06 AM
1

So she was a shit show and you get to only see your son 3 times a week. That’s unforgivable to me if I’m understanding she had majority custody.
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 01:43 AM
6

Dude. Ignore her. Look at her actions. Her actions say she doesn’t love you for a long time. Sounds like she is looking for soft landing of her situation falling apart. You should laugh her face!
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 10:01 PM
1

Dude you fucked up by getting her pregnant. Or she did it on purpose. Get a dna test man. You know how many women get a nice guy to cover this up!
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 04:27 PM
3

Why are you letting her decide what you do? I would not try meeting people now man. Focus the split and all that entails. Where are you going to live? You’re still married so you are radioactive to most women anyway.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 04:24 PM
1

Well WTF happened? There has to be some big hits that happened. Reading this I feel you need to be better at being indifferent to her. This drives women crazy. Meaning it makes them think more seriously about shit. You guys are not in reality, separation is a grey land. You’re still paying for everything as normal. Shake things up. There is probably shit happening with her that you have no idea what’s going on. Guaranteed.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 03:17 PM
1

Unfortunately it’s going to be tough. You need to get support from your family. I expect you have a counselor? She is going to play dirty at every level if she is a narcissist. I would be extremely worried about false accusations, police, and keeping the kids from you. Do you have any leverage to keep her at bay?
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 03:12 PM
3

Yes. Absolutely. In the moment you’re not thinking of all the shitty things she did or how bad she made finances, bedroom, work……
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 03:01 PM
3

What about friends? Do something different. NFL games should be good. Take a pad out and just brainstorm some ideas. Put it all down there.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 02:59 PM
3

What does your lawyer say? In court you need to rip apart their accountant friend. You need to say you had a professional valuation. It’s XYZ - 25 years in the business of valuing businesses. No respect your honor but a family friend business partner is not a trusted source for me in this matter and I would not like it considered as expert evidence. Her lawyer is probably heavily influencing her and of course they would love to drag it out. So you have to play it carefully. I’m thinking one time…
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 02:29 PM
1

Yes, You should go as fast as you can through it and be done with it. Then take it out of park into first and drop the hammer.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 02:19 PM
1

Meaning if you’re working or have plans. Don’t respond. You’re a busy guy and have choices. If you get a message on a dating app….. Wait a bit and decide based on what it says. My advice was tinder to start, so unless it’s to meet up in a few hours after work, there is no point of responding quickly. Women are not a priority for you right now. It’s grinding out assets and career.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 02:05 PM
1

🤘. When I was going through the divorce I watched captain America winter soldier at night. He was doing the right thing, but most were against him. That was my theme. When dealing with exes you ignore. But sometimes You grab the chainmail and a battle axe. Ok. You want to a piece. I’m ready. All women that pull bullshit you have to check them hard verbally or with other actions.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 02:00 PM
3

Op- This is what I’m saying. This is reality.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 01:51 PM
4

Yes! This is what I tell everyone. She will say one thing to you face, and she has plans going on behind the scenes. Bad ex’s thing 2-3 moves ahead on how to manipulate you. You should always be prepared for worse case scenario and and a plan to destroy it. Keep in mind selling the house you have to pay a realtor 3-6%. So that should be deducted. Fuck that $20k number.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 01:49 PM
7

She is just taking a cheap shot at you. These are the actions of a shitty human. Change your mind set man. Good riddance to her. You broke the chains! (Breaking the chains - by Dokken) Time to get to work! Gym Eat healthy Hobbies Friends Kick aZz at work Grind out assets
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/24 10:10 PM
1

Yeah well a lawyer makes sense and you should be splitting marital assets. Stop being nice man.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/24 07:05 PM
6

Yep shut the talking down Man. Time to find a lawyer and know where very penny is and owed. don’t fuck around and “find out” what she is doing. You set the pace of this divorce. Get you ass moving. It’s a good start to get into another room! Lawyer- what’s the plan look like in your state with the assets you have? You need to know! You’re moving into the business arena with a divorce. Time to kick aZz man. Use the system to protect assets. Kids? Maybe trusts would be good for them.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/24 07:02 PM
3

Start with tinder. Go into it it’s a distraction and have fun. Keep your profile simple. Goal is practice and get use to see red flags so you can avoid those women. If your gut says run away, listen to it! only meet for a drink and first meeting! wear protection, dispose of your protection! don’t respond to messages quickly. Probably guys have better tips than I do. You’re going to have some good stories after this. Again it’s just a distraction.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/24 03:41 PM
1

Dude I read a previous post of yours. Based on your health you should get out of the marriage and retire soon. Focus on getting as healthy as you can and being happy. Maybe retiring could reduce alimony. Lawyer - look at all the angles. 1 - talk to a shit ton of attorneys 2- discuss trusts set up for the kids and business. 3- kids as beneficiaries of your life insurance 4- update you will man. This is just off the top of my head. Shady moves by your wife on spending. Look at the bank accounts. J…
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/24 03:32 PM
6

It’s tough man. I swear working out does help a lot. Eating right. In 60 days you’re going to say holy shit. Make a giant to do list. You need to be organized. Accomplish tasks every day. Include finance, Dr visits, dental, car shit, Change passwords, everything.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/24 03:24 PM
16

You need to at least consult lawyer man. You need to know what goes down in your particular state. You have a daughter? So child support is going to be required. Does you soon to be ex work? If she makes less than you support might be required - depends how long your married. Own a house? Did you buy before marriage Here is what she is going to do (unless she makes more money) - she is going to want more than 50% of everything and she is going to either try to persuade you or threaten you to giv…
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/24 02:30 PM
1

Sell the guns to a friend - really sell them but wink wink you get them back later. Say you used the money to put a retainer for a lawyer. The motor cycle worth much as book value? Get her ring appraised - leverage.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/24 12:59 AM
4

How is she with her cell phone? If it goes with her everywhere in the house and she is guarding, you have a big problem.
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/24 09:55 PM
2

That short of marriage- would not be much. But I would move out and take your cars that are yours. Leave her hanging if the lease end is near. Or tell her to move out (after you hired a lawyer) Call her parents? Hire a lawyer. Are you in a at fault state? Is she at fault? Wife going to school starts cheating is a very common story while the guys is the earner.
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/24 03:34 PM
4

Dude. Yeah you’re in the shit now mustache. 80% of women won’t want to date you while not divorced if you are up front with them They also don’t want to be the rebound. If you have good looks/ pics or money than that helps your %. Because women are superficial. Women in the same boat or divorced may give it a shot. They come with baggage. Personally - I advise doing tinder as a distraction and only to date casually and have safe hookups. You can use the other dating apps to distract as well. Onc…
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/24 01:34 PM
2

Yes it will not be amicable. She has addiction problem. The kids see you guys and know it’s not good. Hopefully they learn not to be like this. I feel bad for your kids if you both work, she is alcoholic and you don’t want to be with them. You divorce and she has them full time? WTF? But that better than being with you and father that doesn’t want them. Divorce makes sense. But you should try to be a dad. Hire a nanny to help you with the house for sure when divorced. Qq
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/24 01:24 PM
1

Fuck no. You see a lawyer and line all this shit up ready to go. Then you call your family. Then you talk to your kids. Then you call her parents. Then you tell her it’s over. Women do not take accountability. They just don’t.
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/24 02:31 AM
1

No. The only way to get it done would be for you to bait him to come to your house with a ring camera and let him make a move. Then you would be able to defend your self. Is the other guy married? Maybe send him a message that “he was welcome to come over anytime. But alas a coward and cheat usually don’t like to be held accountable their acts. So maybe he should stay under his rock.” I would look more to (after the divorce) talking to your wife’s boss and his boss. Informing them of the poor et…
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/24 02:27 AM
1

Pay for what stuff? Women protect there social media. That’s where you can hurt her. But when the timing is right na the divorce is final. Unless you can unleash info anonymously.
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/24 11:25 PM
3

Cheaters keep cheating and lying. So yeah you can’t trust her. Ass from the last is a good plan.
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/24 08:55 PM
3

That personality she is going flip her shit when you do it. So be prepared. She might need to a see a doctor, unless she is having an affair. First. - see an attorney so you not guessing at what happens in Texas. Is there’s change in alimony after 20 years? Second. - play the long game and start planning the exit. Where are you going to live. What heirlooms and personal stuff do you need to protect. Maybe a trust might be setup as well. No where you are at to the penny on assets and debts. Third…
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/24 04:50 PM
9

Hire a lawyer and get the business set up in a trust. Or whatever a accountant says is legal
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/24 10:59 PM
1

You need a divorce accountant/finance guy. They can set up the way to protect assets legally.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/24 01:15 AM
2

Use leverage. she is going to want stuff/ things. Negotiate everything . No free assets. Don’t give her all the furniture without getting something in return. Every state is different. Consult a. Attorney at least to know how the basics is going to go.
/r/Divorce_Men13/08/24 08:10 PM
2

Hold your cards. Don’t say what you want. Use her needs and wants to leverage to get it. No free assets. You should still hire a lawyer if you have substantial assets.
/r/Divorce_Men13/08/24 07:58 PM
2

You need a lawyer and follow their instructions
/r/Divorce_Men13/08/24 04:53 PM
2

Nerve go back. If they have established themselves as a liar and cheater. They will keep doing both.
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/24 04:52 PM
1

Lawyer. Change locks. But a ring camera up.
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/24 11:42 PM
8

It’s all about actions not words. You should be the leader in divorce. It’s now a business deal. I don’t know th particulars but if she is like that she has moved on. You sure she hasn’t monkeyed to another guy already? But they always come back- could be in 10 years.
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/24 11:41 PM
11

Just don’t get into a relationship for awhile. Focus on the career and yourself. Friends sports hobbies. Women down at # 42.
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/24 11:37 PM
4

She is a 304. Just try to unlink your finances. In the divorce you will not out for her expenditures. Yes have a daily log of all this shit. Lawyer?
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/24 06:33 PM
36

Not feeling it =. I like this other guy. I don’t love you. Space= I am going sleep with other guy and don’t want you to know. Don’t love you or respect you. No divorce =. I want to use you to pay for stuff still until I can figure out how to screw you over. And of course blame you but still not let you know I’m cheating. Lawyer and divorce and don’t tell her. Get you shit all lined up. Don’t be a nice guy doormat. Go to the gym! Eat better. Mentally this is a game changer for your head. Don’t le…
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/24 03:40 PM
1

I would call her family and yours and tell them what you found and moving to divorce. Hopefully you have evidence . Are you a at fault state? Can she go live with her family? Get rid of your guys bed and that might help her move out. Throw the mattress on the ground . Bed had termites She is fighting you on divorce- - because you have to keep paying the bills -gives here time to scheme I would be ready to record whenever she is around. Since there is a child I would get a lawyer. She is an estab…
/r/Divorce_Men10/08/24 05:08 PM
1

Control the narrative. Don’t bitch if you keep silent. This is absolutely standard protocol by ex wives. Put daylight on it. Set the record straight.
/r/Divorce_Men09/08/24 04:57 AM
10

Crazy never gets any better man. It’s a Losing battle. Play like you’re willing to work on it but plan the divorce behind the scenes.
/r/Divorce_Men09/08/24 04:48 AM
2

What about the confusion for your child of another guy in the picture already. That is the biggest fucking problem your soon to be ex has established. That’s on her. But the therapy should be about that. Tell her keep the douche away from my kid and I consider changes in communication. Tell her I am journaling all this. When he is older I will tell him what slag you are when this went down.
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/24 03:00 PM
3

I’m just saying if you figure what your enemy is doing and why, you can use it against them. If her end goal is divorce, use the kids as blackmail to gain assets, and be with another dude while he pays for it…..(which is the oh so common plan). She is using the children as hostages against him. Judges don’t like that at all. So he has to battle today and lay it out to the lawyer. Which also means using whatever you can against her. If he lives in at fault state it can turn the tide quickly if sh…
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/24 02:07 PM
6

She is following a textbook plan to destroy you. There is something else going on behind the scenes. You need a lawyer to protect your rights for the kids. Stop fing around and get one. So you have to figure it out what is her motive - usually another guy? She was doing school work? So is she going to college?
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/24 12:27 PM
2

Does it matter? She is a cheater and a liar. And just a heads up. If she is comfortable cheating and lying to you, she has been doing it a long time. Wives that want to find themselves- always means - ride the sausage carousel and have it subsidized by you/ while you sit on layaway.
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/24 12:21 PM
8

Hit the gym 3 days a week. Start with 30 mins of walking or elliptical. Make small changes in your diet and keep building on success. One step at a time
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/24 11:17 PM
32

Well man. Call and consult lawyers. You need to be protected and ready. Don’t dick around and be reacting to her. Be a man and lead. Be prepared for dirty tactics against you to get you out. Also- if she just dropped this on you….. there is another guy(or women) that she is tied to. How far? Usually if she is ready to split she is already cheating physically.
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/24 11:14 PM
1

You should consult an attorney. Every state is different . But I would think you would have to bring it to court and your kid will have to probably be part of the process.
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/24 01:25 PM
5

Well. You stay silent your ex makes up whatever story she wants. That’s why if she is responsible (cheater, mentally unstable or something like that) you control the narrative from day one. Taking the nice guy high road with your ex doesn’t work in divorce. You can grey rock but take action and kick aZz. Divorce is all business and affects your future. Setting the tone early and keeping her reading to your moves is what you want. Unless you have some draw dropping evidence you have to let it go.…
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/24 01:21 PM
2

Find a really good lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/24 02:00 AM
6

Yes. Do not take the high road. Instead it’s Call of duty. What results will affect you the rest of your life financially. So any leverage you have you should use it. Be prepared for shady actions and false accusations. Don’t tip your hand that you see the messages
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/24 01:52 AM
2

First off man, you should talk to your family for support for this move. If you trust they can not spill the beans. Because when you tell her you might want to have someone else there.. -I would have anything you cherish or value slowly moved out of the house to family. -when is the lease up? It sounds like you should time your exit when you can afford to walk away from the apt.
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/24 01:46 AM
9

Always this way. Always
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/24 12:31 AM
1

I would lean towards she cheated or is monkey branching to another guy. You deploy she wants to play.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 11:22 PM
5

What chores? Just clean up after your selves. You should consult a lawyer. Every state is different.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 08:50 PM
2

Pay the lawyer. She will change her tune. at least consult. You’re asking us for legal advice. My advice ,is if she is already starting with threats and shenanigans that you have too slow the battleship and swing all the big guns around at her.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 08:08 PM
1

Judges hate when spouses use the kids as pawns. You should bring this up and if you have evidence even better. It really pisses them off. You should be allowed to fire your attorney. Then show up for court and say you had to let the attorney. You can file a complaint with the BAR. Is north Caroline a at fault state?
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 08:04 PM
1

Forgiveness doesn’t mean stay and keep taking the abuse and being a doormat.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 07:18 PM
1

Man. The seatbelt fodder ain’t going to mean shit in court. In fact when people make complaints like that it almost seems to me it’s to cover her betrayal and make you the scapegoat. But I’m just reading into it. I don’t know the real story you have. You need a lawyer. Call and meet a bunch and pick the best that can combat a bull dozer ex. That’s her tactics. You should be ready for anything. Be ready to record her. She will lie to get you out of the house. Usually they call the police and set …
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 07:15 PM
3

Nope you did the right thing. . She it’s nuts. She is dangerous. She should go to a hospital. This is extreme abnormal behavior. There defined is something wrong with her.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 06:59 PM
7

Her actions say you should get away. You have to develop contingencies for her bat shit actions. You can’t be nice anymore. Anything you can leverage against her you should. Be ready to record.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 05:19 PM
1

Unfortunately you’re not going to reach her. She is too far gone. Years will go by and when the kids are teens and can make decisions they might not want to live with her. Any chance of setting something up some her parents stop by and the kids are unattended? They ream her out? I’m brainstorming. -you could have anonymous call. Maybe someone pretends to be neighbor. Also you could go down and ask the police what they would advise. Might be a city statute… idk. The more I think about it a letter…
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 02:25 AM
4

Too young. Does she really love the kids? Is there anything else that she does that’s a red flag for kids? Is she really running? Can the kids call her on the phone, is their a plan for them just in case. You could do a welfare check which would start a shit show. Cops coming and no adult around. Kids do shit. I did shit as a kid. It’s just a huge gamble. Do you have a lawyer to ask?
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 01:14 AM
27

She is a shit show. When she needs a favor you say remember when you acted like lunatic. No favor.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 12:06 AM
2

Mortgage is in her name. I wouldn’t pay any towards that unless she can be realistic. If she bought it before marriage it will stay with her. In most states
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/24 09:42 PM
1

Come on man. Get a lawyer already. Split the accounts up. Change your passwords. She is a liar and a cheater. Her goal is Set you for the fall and get as much $$$ as possible. She has no respect for you. Time to teach her respect and tell her to fuck off. After you see the lawyer. Get a plan. Work the plan. This is now a business deal you need to win.
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/24 06:17 PM
3

Yeah. Laywer. She doesn’t love you. She wouldn’t say move out. What she wants is for you to you for everything and leave.
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/24 06:13 PM
1

You make a lot more than her or somewhat close? I would secure the accounts and at least 50% of the assets. Then no you don’t pay for everything. But you don’t want your Credit sunk. Maybe she will move out if the power gets shut off? Lol What are the bills? Mortgage Utilities- Internet - Tv Your car- Her car-
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/24 05:49 PM
4

Dude. Wake the fuck up. She is lying about everything. Her actions show you who she is. She is a cheater and liar. Get a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/24 05:10 PM
3

Does she work?
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/24 04:54 PM
4

You’re an idiot. She doesn’t love you or respect you. She has cheated many times. Cheaters keep cheating. You are simp doormat she wipes her feet on. Break means ride Sausage while you pay her expenses. Advice- see a lawyer and be a leader and a man. Cut off the expenses. Go to the gym Watch strong successful male in YouTube We have all been through these bullshit circumstances
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/24 04:52 PM
1

You might look into 2 bedrooms and see if you can use the % of rent/utilities expense on your taxes because you work from home. That’s a tax guy question though.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/24 06:51 PM
8

It’s tough man. My ex kept trying to bully me to eliminate my time away from the family ( so I can cool and clean after being at work 60 hours) I played on a basketball league once a week and even she tired to get me to quit that. I drew a line and said no. Anyways. Idk the answer. I lost touch with the bball group. But like you said it was a life line.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/24 06:47 PM
1

If you have Little left and can pay everything hats off to you man! How are you going to handle 2 little ones? I assume your the full time worker and is she stay at home? You definitely can get by with 1 bedroom when they are little, if they sleeping over. When kids are old enough- play ground playground playground They love it.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/24 06:26 PM
2

Lawyer. Call a bunch. Pick someone That seems like they are pissed at the asset grab. Females understand females better.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/24 12:26 PM
2

1- restrict your self satisfaction 2-Don’t be afraid to take matters into your own hands”hand” when with her. 3- there are some supplements that work well
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/24 11:21 PM
12

Time to tell her to fuck off. She can move her ass out. Get a lawyer and dictate the pace of divorce. You have the leverage because she wants to leave the country. You can drag it out. Start calling lawyers yesterday
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/24 11:13 PM
1

You can’t pull your punches man. Get the cops involved. You need to fucking win for your kids. That money should be going to them not that pos ex. Get the police reports going. Make her pay child support. It’s better to go full assault and then ease off.
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/24 12:17 AM
1

He is she uses seeing the kids as blackmail. You can hold her in contempt: judges don’t like that at all.
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/24 12:14 AM
2

Dude. Take charge and get it done yourself. Women stall resources $$$ coming in. Don’t fucking text her. Get a lawyer man. Get it done. You need to n own what to do and not sit fucking around. The best defense is offense. She is expecting you to be the nice guy doormat and let her bull doze your aZz. Time to wake the fuck up.
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/24 12:03 AM
3

Well. Be ready to turn on bizness mode. Her way of life is in jeopardy. She will probably come at you hard with demands and shenanigans. Be prepared.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 10:55 PM
7

You should never sit back and let her dictate. Reverse this and start taking the lead. Push fast and hard for divorce. But negotiate. Don’t be a nice guy and just give her shit. If she took stuff, she can have it but you want value $$ towards back in an asset you want to keep. Read to Many stories where guys are miserable and they say they gave it all away. And they kept getting steam rollered and want sympathy?
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 04:37 PM
3

Cheaters tend to cheat their entire life. It’s best to be sure and dna test the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 04:06 PM
7

Family counseling without your ex.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 04:04 PM
6

Hey man. Women always look for the replacement before leaving and especially before telling you. That way they can have you support and fund their lifestyle while they look for your replacement. It’s all About $$$$ to women until they find another sucker.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 01:30 PM
3

Okay dude. The reality is she started an emotional affair ( as far as you know) and then decided separation. Based on my exp….. what you actually know is only 20% of the truth. So your thinking couple months, I think there has been an issue with her for longer and if she is willing to do this while married and with kids, she was probably willing to cheat many times before this. It’s a real shitty thing to do. Just don’t go back. Once this guy pumps and dumps her she will be looking for resources…
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 02:11 AM
14

Just don’t ever take her back! And get std tested. Make sure you tell your family and her parents the truth about her.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 02:00 AM
6

Sell the bed frame. Throw mattress on the floor. See what she says then.
/r/Divorce_Men28/07/24 04:27 PM
5

You should look deeper into it but still go forward with divorce plan. She is not expecting it so check her phone. When Women start being disrespectful it a can be big indicator that she has started to mess around. Certainly not something a wife that lives you says. Tell her you ca. be a single mom. If that’s what you want .
/r/Divorce_Men28/07/24 04:26 PM
1

Wheee are her parents? I thought about day dream, what if you sold the beds. Sold the furniture. Started smoking. Leaving beer bottles everywhere. Pissing in them. Just make it unlivable for her.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/24 11:34 PM
4

Make sure you ask the judge for time to get an attorney and make sure you state she has hijacked the banking.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/24 11:30 PM
1

That’s a lawyer question. You could threaten to sue her civilly for defamation. It sounds like the judge doesn’t want to hear her bullshit. One thing you could do is file contempt charges for anything she is not honoring.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 01:08 PM
5

You need to have action plans for worse care scanrios. - police called on you - false accusations of abuse on her or kids - false statements about you regards to criminal activity or addiction. - attempts to do all of the above to kick you out of the house. Some of this you can avoid with a good lawyer. Pay the money. They may be able to have a plan and statements ready from friends and relatives to avoid her going this direction. Keep the high ground on this when your are ready to make the move…
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/24 03:31 PM
2

Go to an early grave is the option you are picking by staying. Why don’t you see a lawyer first and play the long game. Collect evidence that sways custody in your favor.
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/24 03:27 PM
10

Yes she has a plan to screw you over again! Look at her actions you listed! Never ever trust her again . You should sit down with the kids and have a talk about this and really be careful what you say but also lay out your feelings on this. Yeah not easy! I would grey rock her ass. I have repeatedly said ex’s want primary to ensure $$$. When they get that, they want to get rid of the kids to you (under the guise she is being nice) to take them more but keep the money (food etc is expenses- if sh…
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/24 01:57 PM
1

Get a lawyer now man . Lock and load.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/24 08:48 PM
1

Depends on the state. You should consult a lawyer. Most ex wives want primary because they want the $$$ that goes with it. You can be 50/50 and still play child support. If she is unemployed or a part timer. Ideally your ex will want it 70/30 her way and get the money maxed . Then she will want you to take them more but not have the money change. She will want to go out dates and party on your funding.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/24 08:44 PM
7

It’s a soon to be x game, ploy or a stall tactic. 1- she doesn’t want you happy. So she wants to destroy this new relationship. Look at her actions before. She doesn’t love you. 2- the longer the divorce process the longer you gave to pay. 3-the more she dogs you the more she can go back to screwing you over.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/24 08:40 PM
5

Dude. Yeah. Single mom is always a big no go. And she doesn’t drive? Yeah bye bye
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/24 09:45 PM
10

Hey man, huge possible indicator she has someone else she is with or starting to be with emotionally.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/24 09:41 AM
4

Yeah don’t talk shit before the game is over. I do believe in grey roach but I don’t believe in the high road. This is now a business deal that will affect the rest of your life. You negotiate the best outcome you can and don’t take her threats and bullshit- because it will come no matter what road you take. Don’t sit back and wait for her attack. Take the high ground and hold it. Use any leverage/knowledge you have.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/24 01:44 AM
24

Dude. Don’t chase her. This shit started way before you discover it. She doesn’t respect you or love you now. That’s why she is trying to steamroll your nice guy ass. No matter what outcome you want (divorce or recon) . Don’t beg and be a whiny doormat: Be the leader with you and the kids and the divorce. Don’t sit back and let her dictate to on to you. This is now a business deal. Negotiate everything. Get a freaking lawyer. No matter what you do she is going to try bullshit. You have to be fir…
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/24 01:35 AM
3

Just remember to not give in to her bull shit. No matter what you do high road, low road, amicably….. she will continue to do the bull shit. So don’t be afraid of her actions- she is going to do it anyway. Now is the time say fuck it and fuck her. Glad to be done. Work hard, be a good dad, fight for the kids time, get mentally and physically fit. See your friends, hobbies, sports. Look at your finances with a fine eye.
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/24 05:07 PM
4

If you can get a better deal and. 2 bedroom, it makes sense. Where I live it takes $2000 a month to get a 1 bedroom and that’s low end.
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/24 12:24 AM
1

Lawyer and don’t say anything until you have everything a to z lined up.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 07:01 PM
3

Put them up for adoption for a better life
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 07:00 PM
8

Man. You can’t stop her shit show. And believe me it will implode. You can control your path. Now in the time to take care of yourself. Be a good dad. Kick ass at work. And be a hard ass negotiator. Don’t let her know that your end game is your investments. Really make her work for the house. Maybe even float that maybe it would be best for you to have the house. Do happy stuff for you. Example: Now is the time to get the car you want (within reason). If I had the money at the time I would get a…
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 06:56 PM
5

Sitting around playing defense is Not the way. Be the leader in the divorce. Set the record straight.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 05:10 PM
3

That’s the wall man. They want their special day before age starts affecting them in appearance and baby making. Even if it’s just to settle for a resource nice guy. Lot of her friends are usally married by then. Pressure from that and the parents.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 03:56 PM
3

I would look deep into her phone. If she cheated it could be there somewhere
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 03:53 PM
2

Did you get a dna test man? Just to be sure. I’ve been around the block, so when women become distance and angry…..then shit does down it’s best to be sure. Are you 100% sure it’s yours. Did she lie about being on birth control? Because it’s bull shit is she says she didn’t know what happened. She may have planned the pregnancy. Don’t underestimate a women making 2-3 moves ahead of you. The best thing you can do is show her with actions. Words are meaningless at this point. I don’t know what act…
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 03:42 PM
8

I would have it all lined up man with lawyer. I would call your family for support. I would be ready to call her family after you tell her or right before. I would have any weapons out of the house. I would have anything that could be broken that you love out of the house. I would secure your passwords and protect your share of the assets. You might want to have a family member there when you tell her.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 01:53 PM
7

-Mom is divorced - family is bad people -Her close friends are 304’s -She has a list of guy friends -She is heavy into social media - and showing herself -she lives beyond her means- looking for a resource daddy bf - she wants to move in with you too quickly - attached to her phone - girls nights and weekends when she is exclusive - wants a relationship but wants to club and party still with out you. - talks about open relationships - she is almost 30 and pushing for wedding - single moms I’m su…
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 01:46 AM
5

Yes. Keep the high ground! It’s all business now with her. And you play to win this deal. Too many guys sit and wait for the shit show to hit them and then are moaning about it. You should have cameras at home to protect yourself. She will escalate when she feels it’s crumbling.
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/24 09:16 PM
2

Who pays the rent at your current place. Do you family close by? Turn her ass in when she has drugs in the house. Yes you can get unemployment based on what you said. You can get another job. You just need to hustle:
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/24 09:10 PM
0

Your divorce. You settled. You need to own your mistakes with your ex and what you have up. She is a dirtbag no doubt. And she will go down hard into the gutter, rest assured. Now you need to stand up and start kicking ass in your life. Date women for comedy and hopefully fun. Low priority. Focus on your plans for retirement, hobbies, sports etc. Watch Strong successful male on you tube with your son. Prepare him to see the red flags as they come. Prepare him when to walk away immediately and wh…
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/24 06:50 PM
2

So she works. Dead bedroom as well? It’s always a concern when there is a lack of sex and affection where is she getting it from then? Usually the signs are readily available :working late, business trips, extensive shopping hours, girls night, phone guarding. But you may at the point that’s you say who cares. Surprisingly your daughter probably knows a lot more than you think. If you have a lawyer and everything is going okay. I would focus on joining a sports team and a hobby club. At mast a c…
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/24 04:37 PM
8

Don’t just give her the house. Negotiate. -The ex is speaking poorly of you guaranteed. So all this out at night. Whose credit card is paying the credit card bill for shopping and dinner? Does you soon to be ex work. Your daughter probably feels she needs her mom more at this age. When she is 17 she will hate her.lol. But you could suggest counseling for you and her to protect the relationship? And you could come up with Coparenting plan as well during this time period. What do you think the rea…
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/24 03:25 PM
1

You need to prepare for anything at this point. Secure your accounts and change passwords. Anything you value get it into storage or family and out of the house. New bank account for your paycheck. Grey rock is good but be ready to record. Clamp down on the credit cards, close accounts as needed. Make it clear to here you are not financing her bullshit life.
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/24 12:00 AM
3

Just read this. Lawyer! Don’t be a nice guy. She is going to do bullshit no matter how you play it, so stand your ground. Get your assets protected.
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/24 05:25 PM
8

Way more going on the this man. For one she lying to you about the travel and they need her. That’s bull shit. Lack of sex and respect means no love and possibly cheating. I would look at her phone to see what is really going on man. Unless it’s with her 24/7, and if that’s the case she is definitely cheating. Introduce her to she’s a single mom plan and she won’t be traveling anymore. Seriously. Get a lawyer asap and go for primary custody. Stay on the offensive.
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/24 05:20 PM
8

Honestly you have to go into self preservation mode so she doesn’t take you and your daughter into her shit storm. Dude you need to stop being a nice guy when you get back. Divorce. She can become single mom. When you get back - start consulting lawyers - talk to at least 5 And pick one that seems taking no shit. - secure your accounts- change passwords - open another account and move some money into it. Move your paycheck deposit as well. You can do transfers as needed to pay bills. - I would a…
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/24 01:20 PM
3

Okay. But be careful. You keep giving things up for free she will keep up the shenanigans. If she is treating you like a doormat nice guy, now is the time to stand up and say yeah no. So make sure you get something in return for Giving the house.
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/24 08:27 PM
5

This was all planned and orchestrated by your wife. She knows it’s not true. There is no way back for you. Move forward fast on divorce. She doesn’t love you or respect you. There may be another guy or girl in the background you don’t even know about. Don’t sit back and let her dictate the flow. Get a lawyer and lock down assets.
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/24 05:28 PM
3

Why is she gonna get the house?
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/24 02:07 PM
5

Argh. Always see a lawyer first man. Spiteful ex’s trend to do crazy shit you’re not prepared for! The big ones are clean out accounts and call the police on you and falsify statements of abuse.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/24 03:40 AM
15

Dude she has been banging for 5+ years. See a lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 12:08 AM
9

You’re taking out very rare occurrences. Majority of women do cheat in one form or another! A lot women only leave when they have another guy ready to go or started with already. Many men don’t see the signs and are shocked when she walks. They don’t listen to their gut, don’t ask questions, and don’t look into things more closely. Instead they are Trying to grind out a living and provide. Mine was fucking by the textbook. Say they are not happy. It’s all My fault. She became Detached. Coming ho…
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/24 08:11 PM
1

Similar story for me. Gradually I was doing so much at home and gone 60 hours a week for work. I said fuck it. She started the divorce talk and then I took the wheel and said let’s fucking go. We did Counseling and of course when she was on the hot seat she didn’t like the counselor. I own my shit. But she does not. 5 years later I think she probably gets how she fucked up. But she also doesn’t have a ft job still. Fucking masters degree.. Yes. Looking back the key is staying the leader. I would…
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/24 01:28 PM
5

She knows man. She is just trying to bull Doze you. Stop negotiating. You have to send a message her that your not fing around. So whatever big guns / leverage you have (like information that she doesn’t want her parents to know etc)
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 10:39 PM
11

Yep. This is standard protocol for most women.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 09:25 PM
1

Can you keep the loan as is and pay her out- and have her removed from the loan and deed. Refinance % is pretty high still. Don’t forget if you sold you pay 5-6% in realtor fees.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 08:57 PM
5

You write a log of your conversations - dates and times. She is trying to manipulate you. It hitting her that the resource train is leaving soon. Women think about what they are going to do and say ahead of time to further their plan. Does she have sister or brother you can call?
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 01:05 PM
1

Her relationship will implode. Just don’t let her come back to you.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 01:27 AM
1

My advice is to be the leader. Be the boss. Tell her this sucks. This is what has to change or I will I’m gone. (You should first consult an attorney). She need to know your fucking serious. If she says some bullshit. Call it out. Thats bull shit! So are you in or out. It’s that fucking simply honey. It’s not too late for you to have kids.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 01:23 AM
1

Women always want to control the narrative. Even though it will be filled with lies and half truths.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 01:19 AM
2

She must love 3 weekends a month. I take it that works for you? If you agree to the custody it probably won’t affect child support. Unless it’s a state that counts the nights the kids spend over at your house No way to paying for travel.
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/24 10:20 PM
1

Just drain it.
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/24 10:11 PM
6

Ugh. See if you can move to a better state to divorce in! If you don’t have much in the way of assets and no kids, you should get off okay. But if she doesn’t work then calif likes you to pay alimony more that most states. I would at least consult an attorney and get there thoughts on your details.
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/24 12:42 AM
2

Okay then I’m 80/% sure it will go sideways on you. Don’t make significantly more than her? Did you acquire significant assets during the 6 years? If yes to both those it’s a 100% chance. I would at least consult an attorney. Call 5. Asset division and possible alimony - you need to know what’s involved $$ and the what alimony will Look like.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 03:57 PM
5

What ia stupid is they want to limit your time with the kids because they think they get more $$. Then they want you to take the kids more as long as they get the $$. That’s all ex’s care about. Not the kids, but just $$. Remember whatever she claims- she has no evidence or shitty contrived evidence. Tell the truth. Your honor this is a blatant fabrication. I can provide evidence to the contrary of her fabrication. I have texts and emails from the ex that said she would do this in court and rest…
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/24 10:23 PM
4

Well it probably won’t go that way. Is this going to surprise her? How many years married? Is she a mean and drama person?
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/24 10:13 PM
3

Same with me kind of. The stress and unhappiness will send you to an early grave man. I the it you had a talk about something has to change?
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/24 04:43 PM
1

As tell her pound the sand
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/24 08:50 PM
12

Ass from the past man. Stop being a follower. Be the leader. Embrace divorce cause she is not your wife or your love. She doesn’t love you or respect you. Start treating this as a business deal you need to win. This is your arena now.
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/24 07:09 PM
1

Report and then attorney
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/24 03:07 AM
1

I would consult an attorney that can specialize or has a finance guy they recommend on how to move/protect assets. I would defiantly secure the funds for the kids college ? Trusts. Crappy ex wives tend to not want to help the kids college, because that’s there money to live without working.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/24 05:26 PM
3

Stop Taking the high road. I don’t know your specifics but tell her to get lost. Can you move out. Make sure you secure your assets and personal stuff asap. Change passwords. She can stay her mother.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/24 03:33 PM
3

See an attorney that specializes in elder law and how you can protect the property.
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/24 01:12 AM
1

Sometimes you pay money to save on problem and money down the road. The lawyer is key, you can have a kick ass lawyer or an average lawyer or a crappy lawyer. The good ones are in demand and cost more unfortunately.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/24 08:36 PM
1

What does it matter. She doesn’t respect you or love you. She is lying to you all the time. You have no idea the depth of what she is up to. You know 20%. Move forward with divorce. Don’t be a nice guy. Be a leader.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/24 06:27 PM
2

It’s good to have the end game plan. Do not let her know how much you’re willing to give up to make the deal. I wound not trust her at all. My guess is she will Lead you on while she retains an attorney and then surprise you with huge demands. So please just be prepared for worse case scenario. The worse case scenario. Is that she falsely accuses you of actions and gets you forced out of the house and freezes the assets. This could involve a police call. So you need to be wary.Maybe have cameras…
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/24 06:14 PM
1

If the deal isn’t signed and done. Then put the house proceeds back on the table. You didn’t sign anything right?
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/24 04:47 PM
1

Dude it’s worse on your kids the way it’s been before divorce thoughts. If you split up the kids can go 50/50 and you both work so hopefully it’s a good financial 50/50. What was the big fight about?
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/24 04:41 PM
1

I agree with this.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/24 03:06 PM
2

File a civil suit against her. Do you have any texts, emails, voice mails of her threatening you with anything?
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/24 02:12 PM
12

It’s called your gut. Always listen to it.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/24 02:09 PM
1

I hope you said this is the last time.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/24 01:23 AM
8

Mothers do get the edge. In court you can’t pull punches. Don’t let anything slide. Your honor she is in contempt. 1, 2, 3, 4. Here is the texts and emails regarding these contempts etc. if you can record her legally running her mouth, that is good shit. Pisses judges off to open mock the system.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 05:45 PM
1

You were a nice guy. You let her get away with stuff and still wanted to work on it. She thinks she can do whatever and you will always be there. I wouldn’t believe a word out of her mouth. Anything she is telling you to s a cover for what really happened. Was there any pictures of the kids at the zoo. Did she been go to the zoo? Once a cheater always a cheater man. You caught her one time. She could have a closet of cheating hidden.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 03:24 PM
7

No matter what you do she will keep doing this type of stuff.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 03:06 PM
8

I would try to adjust your schedule at the gym. I can tell you one thing. Her thing ain’t going to last. Right now he’s not oaying for anything financially or emotionally. When the stress comes he will be I’m out of here. Or he starts banging another woman and she gets dropped in the rotation. lol.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 12:51 AM
3

That’s too soon/. That guy is going to say see you to a single mom after the free kitty intro offer is over and she wants resources. Patenting plan include no intros to bf or gf for 6 montha
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/24 07:56 PM
3

If the house is in your name and you bought it before marrying, you should see a lawyer to get her out.
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/24 07:53 PM
1

Too soon man. You don’t know her yet. What big events have you been through with her to even see if she has your back. You should wait another 2 years at least and then live together as the final test.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 09:52 PM
6

She monkey branched to another guy. Once she was sure she liked the guy she asked for a divorce. The separation was planned event. Women think 2-3 moves ahead to get the outcome they want.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 12:53 AM
8

For gods sake man. You have totally been worked over with her bullshit. WTF?! See a lawyer. Write the plan and work the plan . You think it’s going to get better.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 12:49 AM
1

Eeek. Refinance? Can you just an equity loan instead? If you sold there would be realtor fees. Is that factored in. Don’t give anything away. No layups. Sure you can have that I get this/ $1k equity back.
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/24 11:52 PM
9

She slept with him man. She has been lying to you for a long time man. No separation. Just divorce. Don’t warn here! Stop being a doormat. Plan it out then drop the bomb. Also control the narrative. Put her bullshit to your family and hers when you’re ready to drop it.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/24 04:54 PM
9

Doesn’t matter. Start recording as needed. Protect yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 11:56 PM
9

Court manners. Call them your honor. Say good morning your honor. No your honor. Yes your honor. Your honor can I elaborate. Don’t interrupt anyone. Only speak when instructed. If you can back up what you say with evidence, than state that. Your honor that is not true. I can provide emails and text that would show that.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 11:31 PM
2

It’s called your gut. It’s never wrong. Add that to all the other things she was doing and yeah it’s pretty clear. Don’t be surprised if she has a boyfriend in a month ( we just met hahaha, yeah like 6 months ago.)
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 12:27 PM
16

Call her family your self. She is going to lie to them. Call and say you need her out because of her cheating. Or ask you parents to call Hers. I hope you told your family. Men have to control the story from the beginning. Otherwise she will Tell a total fabrication and will blame you for being controlling and abusive.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 11:29 AM
13

Dude. There is another guy. That’s why she started the disrespect and arguments. And also why she moved out so quickly. Move quickly yourself and be the leader in it start the divorce process. Stop all communication With her.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 12:00 AM
3

I hate you! Just kidding. Way to kick ass.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/24 09:19 PM
9

First step is to figure out what is her true motive is a) stall tactic to line you up for the big fall (take assets, claim abuse, call cops) B) there is another guy or woman in the picture. - go through her phone asap to help Clear the picture up for you. C) or she is being honest By staying together it stalls her having to work on her own and have a place and take care of kids on her own etc. Her plan will be to either 1) get you out legally (lawyer/cops) or bully you with threats 2) she will o…
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/24 02:41 PM
4

Where is she getting sex then? Is she out of shape? Have you checked her phone to see if she is up to anything?
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/24 12:15 AM
17

Eject. She used you. Protect your assets. Get a lawyer asap.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/24 01:32 AM
7

File for divorce man. Box all her shit up. I guranfuckingtee she is already dating and hooking up. That’s why no communication. Join a sports team or hobby club of some sorts. I played basketball in a league for 20 years. Loved it.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 08:37 PM
1

Do you have any leverage? Stuff her parents or relatives don’t about? Stuff she doesn’t want anyone to know?
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 08:35 PM
1

I take it you both work decent jobs. $800 a month for 2 kids- seems low, I think she is going ask for double that. You have $35k debt and basically 35k assets. That’s a wash. She is going to want to stick it to you on a house value. If you sell you have to pay the realtor 5-6%. I would try to leave the 401k alone. Can you get an equity loan to pay her?
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 08:31 PM
3

Yeah your grieving. Turn to anger. Embrace it. The. Start taking action. Pull everything back off the table. See a counselor. You owned your shit. Be the man and the leader now of your self. Backed into a corner and you need to fight your way out. I watched captain America winter soldier when I divorced. I admire the way Steve rogers stands by his values and friend - goes against the law and avengers. He stood up to the bullshit and bullying Ironman. And let the Freeform rockets fly. Your ex is …
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 05:08 PM
2

Dude. She is the evil shitty human. That’s why you should never let them start the narrative. Now you know. And time to tell Her to fuck off and don’t agree to anything. And if you can pull back your decisions on the divorce do it. Meaning agreement on assets. Guys always say oh I’ll take the high road and get screwed. Not realizing she will keep doing it because she doesn’t respect you and thinks your a doormat. The signs were all there. You ignored them. You always need to be vigilant with wom…
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 02:36 PM
3

Hire the lawyer and ask them
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/24 11:21 PM
10

Dude. It was all pre mediated. The treat her right is a bullshit cover story. She is lying her ass off. I wouldn’t believe anything she says. Time for divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/24 09:25 PM
6

They are full of shit. So good to move on from them that they easily bullshit you. I would have replied to her she thought you were not interested to “i am now”
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/24 09:12 PM
3

Can he craft a document with the lawyer though for the agreement making the stipulations that he is not liable for the house, mortgage and taxes? Maybe not. the bank would probably say we didn’t Agee to that.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/24 11:49 AM
19

Bullshit bro. You don’t know shit. She cheated. Let her walk man. There’s no saving it. But if she moves out she needs to help Support the kids. She’s thinking It’s lesbian inferno time.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/24 10:05 PM
3

Dude. Divorced 7 months and you’re trying to date for a serious relationship. Pump the brakes bro. Date for shits and giggles for now. Based on your writing you come accross to dates as depressed as well. Are you hitting the gym and eating right? Crank your favorite tunes and get it done. Is your car a happy place or a shit box? Maybe time to get a car you like.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 10:16 PM
2

You’re doing it right if they get mad! They like to play the drama game. Don’t have sex with her man. Keep being indifferent. Now if you can have plans a bunch of nights… that’s even better. Join a sports league or club that’s meets once a week.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 06:23 PM
5

That’s what makes this very difficult. Shit sorry. But you should have called the 911 with the suicide threat and have it documented. She is now a risk to the children. If you’re the primary care giver you need an attorney to help you have primary custody. You can hesitate too long. This could go sideways fast and you will be on the losing side if you let it happen. Do you have family around?
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 01:27 AM
5

Everyone is different. I agree with your decision.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 01:21 AM
7

What a freaking shit show. That’s should be your Knick name for he. Answer the phone “ what’s up shit show? What now shit show? Jesus shit show. Pull the cucumber out of your ass already.” I was going to say if you have those things that would be huge leverage. But since you’re dealing with gollum, he has my ringsssszzz. Fuck the life insurance - she is a freaking evil person. Sorry you had a stroke man. That’s sucks. But for her to want to capitalize on your health is just vile.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 01:20 AM
2

Write a plan and work the plan. Kids?
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 01:13 AM
16

I would say too bad so sad. Why would I want my gf around my shitty ex wife. My gf doesn’t want to go anywhere near her. They have met and that was enough for my gf. Lol
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/24 10:37 PM
2

To do list. Daily, weekly, monthly tasks Put financial tasks, health tasks, workouts Everything. Some tasks you may need to break down into subtasks. Like financial moves. You want to eat better. Put on there go to store and buy your food. Then start kicking ass and.accomplishing.
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/24 09:53 PM
1

Just do your due diligence. People can change. Although It’s hard for someone though that’s hits that many bodies to stay with one person.
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/24 01:31 PM
4

I know it’s tough. I am still dealing with some of what you are saying- especially the friends in other parts of the country. My big advice is join a sport league or hobbie club. I played refereed comp bball for 20 years Loved it. So find something you like. Great way to make new friends. So many sports and hobbies, or even cars (jeeps, motorcycle, mt bike) you look forward to it every week! If you need to do 2 things, do 2. If my knees didn’t suck I would play soccer or softball. Volleyball can…
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/24 12:08 AM
2

I would pull all the offers off the table. Fuck her then. If you keep going down the road you’re going, it will keep happening. Get pissed. Do you have any leverage? Things you know about her if you tell the right people she will be in deep shit? Can you call her parents? Maybe reveal some shit they don’t know. I would even make stuff up. Tell her keep playing and so will I. I have a list of people to contact.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 05:14 PM
8

Awesome. Now it’s business time. This is your realm. You have to be prepared for the worst from her and have some actions ready to go if need be. Try to settle quick if she is in affair fog still - that it favors you.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 04:55 PM
6

Oh for fucks sake. You don’t know shit about her. Yes single mom full custody. Big problem. Don’t ever mention exclusive. That’s on her. yes she is still going out, so don’t think she is not. If she is good looking she is sleeping with other guys man. She is probably using the kids for cover. Oh I can’t this Friday, Billy has an event. The event is her on a date/ Billy’s event is a sleepover at someone else’s house. Your divorced. Takes years to figure out if you can trust a woman. You’re 4 mont…
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 04:52 PM
7

Who gives a shit. Get off your ass and why to a lawyer! Sitting back and doing jack shit will put you on the defensive the whole time. Then you will be back her complaining what she is doing to you and you still have done nothing. Take the high ground and hold it. Get std tested Jesus H. Get your priorities right.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 04:44 PM
2

Hope she chokes on it. Now you can crush it harder.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 04:42 PM
7

Women lie. They all lie. In their head they create a story of why it’s okay to lie. Then they craft another story to tell everyone that it was all you and your the problem. Women lie and take no accountability. People that stab you in the back become enemies. Treat her as such. Learn the lesson and don’t fall for it again.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 04:39 PM
6

Yes, this is huge man. 3 years into it she tells you? Big omission. You would have been gone if she told you in the first 3 months. And what does this say about her true character to keep a list. Where there’s a list there photos and videos as well. Guaranteed. Did she really delete the list or make a copy and hide it somewhere else. Women that sleep around, usually a lot of lying comes with it. Also, I hate to stay it but really attractive women usually play around and get hit on all the time. …
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/24 01:17 PM
2

I would have a contingency plan ready to go. Meaning you make a call and have the retainer ready. I assume she gets a sizable sum from savings and ira accounts?
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/24 12:46 PM
17

Based of my experience…. First off she was cheating before this man. Soon as you separated she was out in the open with it. You don’t know shit about her unless you really checked her phone when together before the divorce shit hit the fan. She is probably still going out while she talks to you about getting back together! She has been lying to you for a long time and even now she is giving you only partial truth. She sees you a nice guy doormat. No respect. She doesn’t love you if she doesn’t r…
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/24 12:34 PM
9

I was the same. Now I make sure I don’t answer texts tell the next day. And I never answer her calls. Then I reply with text. If it’s not in the agreement I’m not doing it. I don’t mind doing a favor. But if I do 10 favors and she does one, then favors are over. Again not responding usually takes care of good amount because of the timing.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/24 09:10 PM
5

It will never happen “because” you are a nice guy. She doesn’t respect you, she wants to keep the status quo. You should do the following for your self. You can be a good man, but not take anyone’s shit. If you want her to go oh shit. You have to be an asshole when it’s needed (even though you’re not being an asshole). When a woman calls you an asshole then you’re doing it right! First off don’t respond to her texts till the next day. Second Never answer the phone when she calls. Answer the next…
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/24 06:17 PM
7

Hire a freaking attorney. Document every fucking thing that happens with her. Like a log. Make copies of texts and emails. Stop playing defense.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/24 06:12 PM
3

Attorney
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 10:46 PM
1

Just make sure you sell it court if it comes to it. Stress, insomnia, health issues. It was a very difficult time for you Ben b blackmailed basically
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 09:58 PM
0

See a lawyer. Spend money to control the situation and protect yourself. Do a consultation. Credit card? get your check deposited in a new account. Sell something Running off the kid is a bad plan and you go to jail. Call the cops when you have the circumstances! Don’t tell her you called the cops. This is your best play. She will be treated for DV if you can orove it.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 05:24 PM
1

Depends on the state unofficially. That’s why it’s key to at least consult an attorney to know how it could go. A lot of guys don’t do shit and wait, and take the high road. Then they get screwed. My advice is to be prepared with an arsenal to battle. You give in once and she will keep Coming back for more. Negotiate everything. If she starts being shady, I would play up any threats she made. I would we embellish that she was leading me to believe the at she would not let me see the kids. I woul…
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 05:21 PM
1

Judges don’t like it when soon to be ex’s make threats on custody, assets, etc. Make sure you record any conversations, retain emails and texts. This is a knock on her character. It may not be the benefit you hope you get out of it , but it will factor in some where in a judges decision. She will go for more than 50% custody and want primary to ensure max child support
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 10:48 AM
5

She using the bull dozer approach hoping you back off. First lawyer. But the you tell her your not fucking agreeing to that. Do you have any leverage? She is alcoholic, pot head, criminal record, mental impairment diagnosis?
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 01:57 AM
2

Reading between the lines of how she is going to react. She is going to be a shit show.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/24 12:40 AM
-1

Sooner the better. Less support for her. Unfortunately yes she will get primary custody unless she has diagnosed mental issues or criminal/drug record. I would set the divorce up. Before pulling the trigger, you have one last talk. But it has to be this is the way it’s going to go from her on out. (You lay out rules) She balls you say hers your papers. Be indifferent. Don’t beg. Let her do her bull shit. She wants to be come A single mom. So be it.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 06:53 PM
4

Until she drops the legal hammer on you out of no where or suddenly all the accounts are empty. I hope not, but you should have safeguards in place. Alerts on accounts.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 04:49 PM
4

Dude it takes 2 to make a marriage work. Owning your shit is good. But letting her have a pass and you taking all of it. Is that the case? Wrong things to do in the man’s handbook is begging, pleading whatever. Instead you should say fuck it. Be the leader. Okay let’s just go to divorce and skip separation. Separation is just prolonging you paying for everything. You shouldn’t never just start giving her stuff. You set that precedent she will while her feet on you.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 04:47 PM
2

Yep. Take the high ground. Get an attorney. You can use a credit card. Or look for pro bono help. Do something. Get a consultation and see if they can direct you for help. Or go see the courts and see what you can learn. So no retirement funds no savings? What are the assets worth that you guys have? Based on what you said about her she is hiding money probably. But she is drinking and smoking it and usually leads to harder drugs. If you have no assets, the biggest concern is alimony and is she …
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 12:58 PM
17

Listen to the lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 12:49 PM
2

Too soon man. I would wait another couple of. Years. Women can put on an act for a long time: have you navigated any tough times with her? Actions. Does she have your back or does she let you deal with whatever and disappears.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 12:44 AM
2

Good point
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 12:12 AM
1

Dude no single moms! Flirting with disasster. Watch strong successful male.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 12:05 AM
1

It’s okay to be an asshole to her. My ex likes to change plans at the last minute and put it on me. I said well I guess my daughter isn’t going to this thing. She screamed your a bad dad and hung up. She then texts an apology. I don’t take that shit anymore
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 12:03 AM
1

I just started delaying my responses to texts. Sometimes 24 hours. Sorry didn’t see it. I stopped answering her calls as well. She can leave a voice mail. Then I would say I hurt my back sorry can’t help. Call your dad. Or hire someone. Sorry Working today, big project due. Have a meeting can’t. Conf call can’t. Left my phone at home. Left my phone in car.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 12:01 AM
1

Lay down the law or boundaries. I would see a lawyer so you know the info and can speak to it. I would call your family and let them know how bad it is. Then call her parents. Then sit down with her and say Here is what we are going to do now. If she says no, okay pull out the divorce AppStore. You have to mean business.
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 11:36 PM
1

Get a lawyer man. Don’t ask us. You should be fighting for primary custody. She is not going to want it. Can you prove the drug use?
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 10:10 PM
1

Your retired. And she is still working. I think in most cases that would backfire to go after you. Keep it clean if you can but if you give in on one thing she may keep asking. You could always leave the us if she starts crap. Would be hard for her to pursue action against you in another country. Why leave life insurance you her? Why not your son?
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 09:53 PM
1

I am about 90% thinking that she cheated. Again. You need to check her phone. They can never cleanse it well enough. There is always something they can’t bear to delete. Pics, videos, steamy chats, or ongoing stuff because you just don’t think she could do it. Hope I’m wrong but there were at least 3 red flags you mentioned that are common with cheaters.
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 01:18 AM
3

Uh dude. She is a fucking liar. You’re falling for the trick they all use. ‘My guess she monkey branches to a new guy (online? At work? Gym?) and then gives you the I need time bullshit. Then you say fuck it. Which is exactly what you should do. Then her monkey branch breaks and she says oh shit! Oh I know I will cry and give him sex. Now that I have that out of the way. Have you ever checked her phone? That’s how you will know for sure. Oh and Out of town with sister usually means fing another …
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 01:13 AM
6

Dude. She moved on with another guy before you found out. It’s called cheating. Why would you ever want to work it out? The arguments stem from her cheating. Cheaters want the drama and to blame you for their failings. I will read your other posts but I guarantee she was hooking up while you’re away. She is ass from the past now. Don’t try to date man. Just look to hookup. You’re in no shape to date. Now is the time to work out every night. Watch a good movie at the end of the night. I watched I…
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 01:05 AM
12

You keep kicking aZz. File a a lawsuit and complaint against CPS. Try to get the news involved. File contempt for divorce agreement. Whatever you can do. Hire a PI.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 11:21 PM
2

Because it’s going to go sideways real quick if they are alone. Just my gut feeling on it.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 01:49 AM
7

Sounds like the split was on bad terms- you saying she left you. Then I would say never talk to her again. Ever
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/24 04:54 PM
6

Dude. Whatever it takes to get you to pay the bills longer. Wake-up. Actions. Look at her actions. Not her words. Actions say she is not reconciling. Get the lawyer and move forward with divorce. Stay on the offensive and get ahead of her managing the assets and debts and protecting your ability to live.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/24 05:08 PM
19

This is a classic trickle truth story. The only truth I hear is you partied and slept around. The self brainwash narrative didn’t work while you were sober but did when drinking. No way you told new guys your still In love lol blah blah blah. Your exit was planned so you could go out. Probably even had monkey branches going before leaving.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/24 12:44 PM
3

I was a teen in the 80’s. So when shit was bad I would listen to these groups (5 years ago) Tesla- mechanical resonance Night ranger hits Ratt - first album Foo fighters
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/24 11:29 PM
1

Trying to smack some sense into you. We all got screwed by doing the same shit you’re doing and plan to do. In your post I read enough to see all the signs of a wife already with another guy. You’re not around, she wants separation and she does while you are gone, she has her career now. So now she just cleared her conscience with that call of what she has been up to. By all means learn the hard way. I would be very concerned what you’re going to come back. Playing defensive the whole way throug…
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/24 08:49 PM
6

You need a smack in the face man. WTF? Where is your anger? Where is the defense of your heath? (Get std tested) There is time to turn it around. But you have to say goodbye to her, not the same woman anymore. She is ass from the past. Divorce. See an attorney right away. Get a plan. You keep driving this road it just gets worst. Time to eject. Call your family. You need support.
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/24 05:29 PM
30

I would skip separation. Go to divorce, get a lawyer. She is already cheating man. She already has someone that’s why she is dumping you while you’re out. This isn’t the person you loved anymore. She isn’t your friend.
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/24 09:16 AM
1

Haven’t tried it but magnesium foot rub. Or you could see your doctor for some help.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/24 11:14 PM
7

She fucked around and got shitty prizes. Some guys take a long time to the land of indifference and lightness. Glad you have been making progress. Time to kick ass man.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/24 09:23 PM
18

Single mom after the 30 year old wall is hit is now seeing oh shit, nobody wants to seriously be involved with me. lol. Move forward man. Focus on career, stacking assets, your kids, happiness and hobbies! Ex wife doesn’t make the list bro.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/24 09:18 PM
6

You get the lawyer and line and everything up top to bottom. Even having a plan of where you are going to live. I would get the vehicle you want now. New accounts and passwords. Then you talk to your wife. You might want to have a sensible kid present. Or if you have a sibling. You have been unhappy for so long. Less is more when telling her.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/24 09:07 PM
5

Dude. Time to act. See a lawyer! She is expecting to run the show. It’s time to show her no, you run the show. Lawyer. Call your parents and hers. Tell them what’s going to happen. Stop communicating to her unless needed She wants to be a single mom so be it. Write the plan. Assets and debts to the penny. She wants a business deal, be all business . Lock everything down. Part of me would want to act like you’re washing your hands of the family, and just don’t be home until time to sleep . Let he…
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/24 08:57 PM
2

You can get dates no problem with the apps. But if you want the better stuff you need good pics, show some toys, and dance around that you have a great job. They will come. I have ok pics, decent job, no toys lol and dated about 12 women in a short time. Most of them were a no after the first date (a drink). I did 2 dates with one and then met my current gf of 5 years. (Neither one of us will get married again). I didn’t use tinder, but I assume if I did I could have had more hookups. You have t…
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/24 04:26 AM
6

Get organized man. 1- Lawyer asap. Her actions have shown you cannot trust her. 2- call your family and then calm her parents. 3- Write a to do list about everything you can think of. Change passwords. Know exactly where the assets and debts are at. Put alerts all accounts. Etc . Listen man. Wives that know the $$$ will not be there for her lifestyle as a single mom do one or more following tactics without fail. - first they start a story it’s your fault and get it out before you even blink. She…
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/24 07:46 PM
7

Talk to your boss. Call you family and tell them exactly what is going on. Then call her parents. Then start vetting attorneys. Lock down the accounts as legally as you can. Open a new account. Change passwords. Her words are bullshit. Actions tell the story. She’s a cheater
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/24 03:52 PM
1

Lawyer. Tell her to fuck off.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/24 02:46 AM
1

Time to break the chains. For gods sake, yes she was cheating. Get std tested.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/24 02:45 AM
1

Too soon man. 1 year and you don’t even live together. That’s why you have anxiety because you don’t even know her. Fuck that. No prenup no marriage. Tell her good luck.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/24 02:31 AM
1

Ask the lawyer. But until it’s locked down and finalized in court- there is still a chance. Once the court accepts the agreement then it’s very difficult.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/24 02:27 AM
6

Request the same from them
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/24 01:40 AM
8

You lay down the law. You are the leader. Say “here is what we are going to do- 1 ….. we wait for 2nd kid. 2….. you figure out something to bring money in to help. 3. You stop fucking complaining and be part of the solution. If you are not on board when these 3 things Then we are done. (This is an example, you decide.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/24 12:06 AM
1

Small claims court. Doesn’t cost much to file. I
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 10:32 PM
2

Dude it’s always 100 times worse than what you know. Get std tested and be indifferent to her. Tell her you happy it’s over. Tired of this bullshit. She can be a single Mom now.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 09:32 PM
1

Best thing you can do is go forward with divorce. Call your parents/siblings and tell them what happened. Then call her parents. Control the narrative to~fucking~day. You keep silent and it’s going to become she did nothing and you’re an abuser and controlling and a horrible father. Right now she is out and saying this guy while you’re at home. Make it painful and shatter her image. Call divorce attorneys . Liars and cheaters keep doing both. This is the second time you caught her but probably t…
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 09:29 PM
13

Poker face. Now it’s a business battle. Stay on the high ground and keep the high ground. Line everything up, divorce, assets, debts, where are you going live, passwords, cameras in house, prized possessions out of the house. Your goal is to protect the assets and debts from being taken or run up. You want to protect your identity. You want to protect your reputation. Protect you family heirlooms or good stuff. The when you are ready. -control the narrative. - call your family and let them know …
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 07:50 PM
6

Poker face. Now it’s a business battle. Stay on the high ground and keep the high ground. Line everything up, divorce, assets, debts, where are you going live, passwords, cameras in house, prized possessions out of the house. Your goal is to protect the assets and debts from being taken or run up. You want to protect your identity. You want to protect your reputation. Protect you family heirlooms or good stuff. The when you are ready. -control the narrative. - call your family and let them know …
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 07:41 PM
4

Stay the course: she had been doing more than emotionally cheating bro guaran fucking teed. Don’t listen to her words. Her actions have shown you what she is.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 05:59 PM
11

Don’t rush into anything man. This sounds like a fairly new relationship. Look at her actions always, not her words. When a few obstacles or tough times come up, you will know where you stand.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 02:58 PM
5

It is not wrong. I said fuck it. And felt lighter too. But be careful. Once you embrace divorcing her they tend to want to come back or f/u into thinking she is working on shit or come back - while all the while making plans on using the assets, divorcing and hooking up.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 02:56 PM
5

Late shift. Please don’t say she is a nurse? Women plan everything. This was a planned assault. She knew exactly what she was doing . I agree with others, when women are ready to leave is because they ware already banging someone else. She just want to make it look like it was you.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 02:51 PM
7

Don’t rush into anything. Actually You’re a prime target for the age 27-30 hitting the wall women. Never ask to be exclusive, let them. Don’t chase. Let them chase. You have the keys to any relationship. It takes years to know how a woman and how she going to react. They are Master actresses. I would wait at least 4 years to get married while in a relationship and then the final test is moving in. Usually when you hit some big obstacles/losses in life, the woman will go one way or the other. Doe…
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 02:44 PM
11

Sorry man. Get mad. Most likely it stems from having eyes for next guy or already started something. I know guys say no way! But 90% of the time they move on like this because they have the replacement. She is being like this because she has spun her false narrative to herself and everyone, now it’s in her head as her story. Just don’t let her back. Don’t ask her and simp for her. Be indifferent. Say fuck it. Don’t be friends. She has shown you she is the opposite of a friend. Treat her as such.…
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/24 11:36 AM
14

First. You should never be the one to ask for exclusive relationship. Especially only after a few months and after divorce. You don’t even know her! You basically are saying you are more into her than she is. You are doing nice guy shit still. Knock that shit off. Nice guy shit gets you the reaction you got. She has the high ground and created drama.’women like drama. So, don’t text or call her. You should be turned off. Don’t chase her. Now you should be a bit of an asshole to her. Wait till th…
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/24 09:15 AM
5

Get a freaking lawyer and stop it. You going to have battle and take the gloves off.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/24 11:45 PM
11

She did want to keep the assets built to finance the new life though.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/24 11:43 PM
7

I agree. When your wife stabs you in the back, then you go to guerrilla tactics.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/24 11:42 PM
1

Get some clauses into the divorce agreement. No bringing felons or ex convicts around kids
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/24 11:35 PM
11

You can’t go back man. It’s never the first cheat if she was ballsy enough to do what she did. Did you get std tested? You move forward. Grind on your career and assets/. Be a good dad. Women are not a priority. No more hooking up. Many cheaters stall the process to line you up for a bigger take down. Don’t eat the waffles in the forest. You only know a small % of what went on. You find out the rest you wouldn’t be asking this.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/24 03:23 PM
2

You need to be indifferent and close off to her. Unless it’s kid related. You’re not friends anymore. Get the money and let her fuck up her loan on her own. Just get the money. Not your problem anymore. I would tell your kids that their mom did not want to be with dad anymore. Maybe take them to a counselor to help the transition.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/24 02:22 AM
3

Depends on the state. Unless you can document with hard evidence. Police reports, mental impairment diagnosed, arrest record, etc. So does she mean every weekend? Or every other weekend. Sounds like she is worried about maximizing her monetary gains from you. At this point consult an attorney. If there is - equity of a house, assets and future payments on the line get someone that will defend your rights. Dont play fuck around and find out.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/24 07:01 PM
3

How long were you gone on the trip? Unfortunately when wives do this they have a backup guy or starting to monkey branch to the replacement. Rarely do they leave without a plan in place. Just look into it. If you aren’t back yet she has the freedom to see a guy and you have no idea.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/24 06:56 PM
7

When she falls. When she really needs help or a favor. Don’t help her back up. Do t answer the phone. Dot. Respond to her text. What comes around goes around. You have a big family event. She is bit invited. At the perfect time, you tell her…. Remember how you talk shit about me on social. I do g want your nasty ass any where near me or my family.
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/24 09:09 PM
1

Lawyer asap. You need guidance on what you legally can do. Maybe you can freeze finances. Be prepared for false accusations supported by your kids. I’m not joking. If they can get you arrested and out of the way then they raid the assets. Be ready to record. You should be able to stash some money into a new account. Just follow the law.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/24 11:49 PM
2

Well it sounds like your daughter made the plan To Leave early. Or she is covering for her mom. I assume you’re pissed about her going I. The house and I would be too. Tell the ex she is not allowed in the house.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/24 07:20 PM
5

You need to push hard with lawyer. Suicidal is usually enough to temporarily get her away. She needs a psych evaluation! Seriously. Call the cops on anything.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/24 03:23 PM
2

Yeah. You have to be an asshole. Unfortunately it will cost you money. She will never change and she will keep at it even after you get the agreement. And follow the agreement to the letter, no giving her a break on shit. If you pay medical benefits You need something in exchange. Don’t accept you pay child support and medical and then you start splitting expenses. Do you have any knowledge of her past that you could use as leverage? Althing she didn’t tell her Parents? Arrested? Drug use?
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/24 02:04 PM
1

Women are not in the top 10. Focus on career. Keep grinding out assets. Focus on finances. Is your money building. Focus on your health. Gym and eating better. Focus on friend. Join a class, club, hobby, sport that you can enjoy! Be it softball, sports cards, fishing, car shows , whatever . -do something nice for yourself. Do you have the car you like (in city not sure you have a car?) You spend time every day in your car, make sure it’s a happy space. One more- decide if you need to move for be…
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/24 01:58 PM
2

Either get a lawyer or just leave her. That’s your options. If you don’t want anything from her, just leave. If you have nothing in writing about debt etc then she can’t really get anything from you. Her only vulnerability is her image. I would call her boss (is it a work affair) and say hey nice company your running. Probably not working hard all the time since she is sleeping with x.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/24 01:46 PM
2

Just walk away from her man. Her actions show you everything. Tune out the words because that’s all bullshit.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/24 01:42 PM
6

Always call the cops. Get the report filed. They won’t try that again. Record record record. It sounds like this is going sideways and you can’t sit back and say I’ll Just weather it out.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/24 01:41 PM
6

See a lawyer - 7 years should not be too bad. Depends on your state. Don’t agree to shit. Get photocopy of her account. Start moving some money into only your account. She owns half the debt and you get half the 90k in most cases.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/24 06:01 PM
2

Renting a room is cheaper but it comes with other headaches. But you don’t have to have utilities and internet in your name. If you have your own place you can run a side hustle of sorts . I pick up dressers etc on marketplace for free and sell them for $40 + . Make a 300-400 a month with little effort. But you pay utilities and internet. wtf is the $125k in debt? Does that include vehicles? Property?
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/24 05:59 PM
8

Fuck closure man. You own your shit and move on. You have to embrace indifference to her. Do not contact her at fucking all. If she does do not respond. Ignore her.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/24 03:34 PM
1

Is she violating the divorce agreement. Is she is you should file contempt on each count. You are on the defensive. Time to be offensive. Every little violation of the agreement. Did you have a cohabitation clause in the agreement? Are yiu playing just child support?
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/24 03:32 PM
1

You are insane. See a lawyer to know how a divorce will go down. Stop being a doormat. Stop showing your kids you’re a doormat and that this is what marriage looks like. Start writing out a plan. -List every single asset and debt and keep track of it constantly. Change ur passwords. -you should start squirreling away some cash for emergencies. My advice what I would do knowing what I know now and what I have been through. - call your family explain what’s going on- she’s cheating -then call her …
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/24 03:27 PM
12

Dude. Don’t believe a word she says. And no more of anything for her. She probably got dumped, or something happened and she needs resources. She is thinking 2-4 steps out…. First I ask to be friends, then I ask for $5k. They always comeback man. Watch strong successful male. Your story is the classic, same as mine. Except mine can’t find a guy lol. I would love it if she remarried.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/24 03:16 PM
3

No! Geezuz h. The opposite. Avoid them.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/24 01:35 AM
8

Just don’t let the SO come back!
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/24 01:13 AM
2

Do you have any leverage information you can use against her to get her off her ass? Maybe something she did and her are at don’t know that they would freak out about?
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 05:00 PM
2

Can you file a complaint against the judge? I
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 11:34 PM
6

This is what exactly you should do! But also focus on your career and grind out assets/success. Building up your activities/hobbies/ interests/health/investments for your spare time when the kids are with her. Women are way down the list, Eventually you should tell her that there is no coming back together ever and please stand over there for fucks sake!
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/24 08:44 PM
7

Dude. Be careful. She will try to flip this on you. If you divorce you need to totally surprise her with it. You should try to get it on camera. Do you security cameras in the house? She did this in front of you. Imagine what she does when you’re not arround. Do not run off with your kid. I would talk to your parents first.
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/24 12:40 AM
3

I like the low road. Wish I would have taken it when it happened to me. I would wait though. Send a social media post starting it is with great sorrow….. that I have divorced my cheating wife of x years. ……… she was with this douch tool named whatever. I would never speak to the asshole. I might call his boss at work and say hey- I don’t want you to do anything, but you should know this guy is a liar and cheater. Maybe that’s who you need at your company? Or maybe not. Planting the seed. Guy wil…
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/24 04:42 PM
2

Okay fair enough. Just be ready for shenanigans. If she asks for or does something stupid, just laugh and say hell no. Set the tone.
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/24 04:30 PM
1

Do they have an investigator that can dig up bad shit on her. Use as leverage against her. The gloves are off. She is trying to screw you. React accordingly. She wants a street fight, so be it.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/24 11:45 PM
4

Why wait. Get fucking lawyer. Being on the defensive the whole time she is going to ru. The show. You’re the leader. You run the show.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/24 11:43 PM
0

For that kind of money on the line, hire an ass kicking attorney.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/24 11:40 PM
2

If you’re unhappy. And have been for a long time. I would go with divorce to the point of being ready to sevre. Have all the ducks lined up. Assess, debts, living arrangements. Then. Tell your family. Then call her parents and then tell her that you don’t see a fix for the marriage. See what she says. But you are ready to go if the answer sucks. Which most likely it will. I would go on a vacation right after that: let the dust settle.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/24 04:21 PM
1

That little time in doubt there is any a Support
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/24 04:18 PM
2

Women need to be checked hard when they pull bullshit. I’m divorced now. She tried to tell me a bunch of shit she was going to do in court- ask for more support, extend child support to 25, take out the cohabiting clause, etc. I went to lawyer and said I’m not doing any of that shit. She walked back very quickly saying she didn’t want to Involve lawyers.
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/24 06:16 PM
5

Year after year of Unhappiness will kill you. Dude the kids know your marriage sucks and you don’t Want them thinking this is the way to go. My advice is tough man. You consult 5 attorneys and see what the outcome for you state will be. You start protecting your self financially. Meaning make sure you have some money for emergencies. Accounts and. Credit cards are monitored. Get the car you want now. Think about any precious items you have in the house and should you relocate them. Now the hard …
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/24 04:55 PM
3

Why didn’t you throw the chess shit back at her? Fuck that. She needs to figure it out. I wouldn’t cooperate Mondays are important days at work.
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/24 04:45 PM
2

New direction to me sounds like another guy. You can divorce and do all the same shit. Instead of extending risk of her fucking you over with debt and spending. Another year of you footing the bills. I would talk to a lawyer. If you do separation make it legal document. Control the narrative and tell all the families that this is what she wants. Don’t let her spin a lie. Stay out in front of this and keep the high ground. You’re the leader!
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/24 12:39 AM
7

Get mad. Load the house up with coffee or whatever caffeine you do . Write a to do list on protecting your assets and finances. Then execute. Change passwords. Put alerts on accounts. Heed the warning. Even though she is in the wrong, she will try to fuck you over more. I would still absolutely fucking consult an attorney! Even if you pay $500 and get a great checklist for you to follow based on your state. Also, tell her family now what she did. Then tell yours. If you don’t…… she will say you …
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/24 08:47 PM
8

Time for an attorney man. Don’t f around and find out.
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/24 07:12 PM
1

Unhappiness leads to an early grave. I was unhappy for years. My ex would fuck up finances, friendships, reduction of what I enjoyed, her lack of holding a job, her ability to oiss off 20% of anyone she meets just by talking, her resting bitchface-book….. and on and on. I would work -‘d commute for 60 hours. Guess who had to do the grocery shopping? Guess who would come home and the sink was full. A shitshow at every turn. I said fuck it. If you say fuck it. Look at the assets and debts and star…
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/24 11:41 PM
4

No she can’t target you or your money. Child support I based on his income. He should take back any verbal agreement now for because her actions. Then Let the judge decide. It will be based on income and in some states it matters how many nights the kids stay over (in the calculation). If he has had a significant increase in wages it could mean more cs. Buy it also depends what the divorce agreement says.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/24 05:12 PM
4

I prefer telling someone she knows in passing and you know it will get back to her. And the wait. Lol. Women love drama that they dictate. If you go at them head to head they like that and will fire back.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/24 04:16 PM
2

New lawyer asap. You need a hard ass lawyer. You need to use the dirt you just own about her against her. How long you been married? That’s. Seems way out of line for having a5 year old.
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/24 11:37 PM
10

Well my 2 cents Space = I’m getting everything set up to fuck you over in The divorce or I’m talking to another guy and possibly banging him. I would have the kids get her something ( which means you guide) but I would make it cheap. Now. You should seek legal counsel.look at all Your assets and debts to the penny and be aware of anything that changes. Change passwords and put on alerts. Be prepared for anything! Be ready to record. Wives desperate try to do the money grab and get you hauled awa…
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/24 11:20 PM
2

Dude see a lawyer. She is going to try to bull doze you into on her keeping the house and all her assets. Just wait and see. Take the high ground and hold it by seeing a lawyer and emget everything lined up. Don’t tell her. Only when you’re ready do it. Her next plan will be to call the cops on you and try to have a protection order to use it against you to do it her way. Be prepared for anything.
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/24 10:40 PM
3

Sounds like she is fixated on $100k. A year. Start with if you agree to her demand that you have an ask as well. A clause that she can’t come back for more if you are successful down the road. If you give In once without a tip your way, she will never stop. Negotiate it all. There is lots of small things you need to. Be very specific. She doesn’t have to pay taxes on the money you give her. You do. If she doesn’t get her way will she tie it up in court and lawyers fees? What about college for th…
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/24 05:19 PM
4

You need to brainstorm. Write down a bunch of shit you’re interested in or even kinda interested in. Even small stuff. Stuff that makes you happy. Playing Sports, hobbies, Bands, sporting events, buy the car or motorcycle you want. Join a club, take a class…. I li
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/24 12:11 AM
5

If she wronged you during the divorce. Then fuck no. Good coparents then okay.
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/24 11:26 PM
4

Single mom. Shields up. Give me warp 10 going the other direction Me Sulu!
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/24 11:22 PM
6

I at one point said to my ex- whatever that bullshit is, it’s in your head. That’s not really what happened. And laughed. Don’t let them slide by and state some bullshit like that. Calm it out.
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/24 05:11 PM
3

Do you have age threshold in the divorce agreement? Mine is 23. She tried to talk me into 25. Fuck that. The ex wife.
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/24 04:04 PM
2

Keep the high ground. If you take the defensive and let her run things it will be bad. Be meticulous on the plan and execute. Even telling your boss hey just a heads up. Nothing bad right now but I am about to let her know soon.
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/24 04:03 PM
14

Time to say fuck it man. See a lawyer and don’t tell her.
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/24 02:36 AM
7

Women think 2 moves ahead of you. She could be honest about everything….. And maybe not. She lures you back to accuse you of domestic violence? She is waiting for more time to go by for better outcome with years in for alimony or asst division….. You were unhappy. Divorce. If somehow you find couple mojo after you could be together just don’t be married. Now is the time to write the plan and work the plan. Does she work? Can she support her self? Time to say fuck it and do the work. Go back to y…
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/24 12:51 AM
3

No. You should have everything lined up. Everything. Everything! Lawyer, living arrangements. Assets to the penny. Alerts on accounts, emergency fund, change passwords Write the plan work the plan. That includes being prepared for false accusations. Then you tell your family. Then you call her dad. Then you tell her. Then be ready for some bullshit. Record record record
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 09:10 PM
4

You talk to everyone asap. And get a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 12:06 AM
5

College fund. Good school costs 50-75k a year in a dorm
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/24 12:24 AM
7

Ass from the past now. Women run in a herd of stupidly. Just don’t answer the phone when she tries to come back. Focus on the kids, work grind and setting your future up. Career. Hobbies. Women are at the bottom. Your ex is now a pump and dump 304. The only guys that will want to stay with her will want to use her in some way via rent or to siphon off $$$.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/24 09:48 PM
3

The judge will hear the info when you present. You can put that deal out there. The more evidence you have the better off. If you have seen her driving he vehicle then have dates. Be soexidix. Then he will ask her. Attorney for sure.! That much at stake. Time to pull out all the stops. Everything you know about her and use it if you can to help.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/24 07:14 PM
1

20 years man
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/24 01:08 AM
1

Say it out loud. By your self. I did. Fuck it. I’m fucking done. The reeling you in is a stall tactic or she is trying to be 2 moves ahead of you. There is always a manipulation involved when they start being nice.
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/24 02:13 AM
1

Well your ex will is already planning to try to spin it so you keep giving her money lol, or has that already happened? If it’s not Iin the divorce agreement don’t pay. And pay the school directly.
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/24 12:49 AM
8

Lucky for me my ex pisses me off quite a bit so I never look back on her. The kids I look back and man I miss the playground days. But the ex is jobless again, tries to be 3 moves ahead of me to get more money (which I have shut down because I’m always on guard.
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/24 05:30 PM
1

Don’t teach your kids this is what a marriage is like. It is better to split and be happy and show them how to be happy and be successful.
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/24 02:04 AM
1

I called it the “fuck it” switch. I actually said it to my ex wife as well. I said fuck it I’m done with this shit. Of course she wanted to try months later.
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/24 02:02 AM
2

In the end a judge may look at continued shenanigans and it may help you some in the end. The only thing I can think off is use her head against her. Someone let her get wind of something…. Like you are saying i hope she drags this out so I can blah blah blah. I have a trip planned blah blah blah. A well thought out leverage play.
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/24 01:05 AM
1

🤘
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/24 11:34 PM
2

Now you can can bounce back and grind out some $$$ and career! Time to kick ass man!
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/24 04:48 PM
3

See the lender and see a fricking attorney.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/24 04:47 PM
2

First off it’s always fucking way more going down than you think! Always! Better off being a roommate - cheaper that way than living in shits ville. You should consult an attorney before doing anything! Call your family and go over it with them. Tell them what she is doing. Make decisions after that. Don’t tip your hand. Make sure you have some emergency cash. Your credit card just in your name and your car keys. Start looking at all financial records and know where reaching stands .
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/24 04:44 PM
1

Focus on your grind! Career and school. Then friends, sports, gym and hobbies. Then finances and investments. Then a little time on women. You shouldn’t have a hard time dating. Just use the apps but be careful. Watch strong successful male on you tube. The red flags are always the same with 304’s. Don’t get into a relationship while on your grind. It takes years to know a woman. When you get around 28 beware of women looking to get married! They want the ring and their moment before 30.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/24 06:41 PM
11

Dude that is how they operate. They can’t tell new guys that they take accountability. Lol They weave a whole new story of lies and repeat it over and over. And then magically they believe it. That’s why you have to control the narrative from the beginning. Or she will. So if you’re a guy and start dating a divorced woman and she says she was controlled and he was narcissistic. I would Ghost her. More than likely it’s all bullshit.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/24 05:15 PM
2

Be a leader. Say fuck it. Be indifferent to her. Focus on you. Your job. Your health, your hobbies.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/24 12:11 AM
1

Control the narrative ahead of time! Don’t let her spin a tale of bs.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/24 11:55 PM
2

Take the job man. You can always revaluate when you’re doing it.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/24 12:09 AM
2

She already has been with other guys and is going to get pumped and dumped. She is now ass from the past. You’re taking the right actions. Focus on you and the kids. Then master your investments and finances. Grind it out. Hobbies and gym is the right track as well. To build up your friends maybe do some coed activities (don’t have to date and if you do it should not be serious at all). Make sure you make changes for you that make you happy. Like what kind of car would you prefer. Always wanted …
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/24 04:21 PM
8

Don’t be a doormat man. Be the leader and initiate divorce….. but find a great lawyer first. Write the plan and work the plan. There is no coming back from this with your current demeanor.
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/24 12:39 AM
2

Yep. This is what I’m talking about. Take the lead!
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/24 01:59 PM
2

There is another guy. Guaranteed.
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/24 01:58 PM
2

Dude. Be indifferent to her. Stop letting her fucking lead. She views you as weak and able to control. Time to do the 180 and say fuck it. Or do nothing and get bent over mentally and financially. Don’t have a lawyer? -Don’t talk to her -Only reply in one word answers or “no thanks” -Be safe- record as needed -Write a plan and work the plan- do you need to start moving hobby stuff/heirloom/prized possessions out of the house slowly? Know to the penny assets and debts. Change passwords and put al…
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/24 01:57 PM
1

Suck it up man. Do the side work under the table. Don’t tell anyone. This money will help you immensely and no taxes. If you make more ahead will ask for more and go to court. If you change jobs look for same pay but more happiness and benefits.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/24 07:14 PM
2

The only other thing is her medical diagnosis’s and scripts showing that she is unbalanced. If it happens and you have marks or the kids do call the police. She will be arrested.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 03:40 PM
4

If you do, do it Anonymously. Make it sound Like it’s someone she works with.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 03:37 PM
3

You need evidence. You need police reports.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 03:35 PM
3

Best friends ha right! I lean towards a meeting with counselor/dr - or research the opinion from them on the web or books. My kids are teens and they really haven’t asked me what really happened. And I’m nervous to tell them my version because my ex is a shit show as a wife, good mom. They tend to report back to her as well. I like avoiding drama.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 01:30 PM
2

Tell her she is being ridiculous and she will go off the deep end. Then laugh at her.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/24 12:43 AM
6

Control the narrative. Tell your family now. Then tell her family. Then Tell your friends. If you let her she will f you over more than just what she has been.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 04:08 AM
8

Not with your current mentality. She has no respect for you. That’s why she is bullying you. She sees you as weak and gives 2 shits about you. Tell her to F off and for her to move out. Be indifferent. Don’t talk to her. Get a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 04:06 AM
13

Slow your roll man. You just got out of a marriage. Don’t rush to date. Now is the time to rebuild. If you do date, apps are free. Coffee or a drink is a mandatory 1st date. So you’re not out much money man. But you’re not in the right head space yet to date. Do tinder for now. No relationships! You and the kids #1 Then it’s your finances and work. Hobbies Friends Eat healthy Gym Dating is number 47 Do not give her any extra money. If it’s not in the agreement she can fuck off. Get a side hustle…
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/24 04:03 AM
17

If you have kids yes. If not, she can fuck right off. Hopefully no kids. Don’t talk to her.
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/24 01:08 AM
1

Draw the line. Hold the line. Ignore her calls. Unless it’s an emergency don’t call me. Don’t respond to messages right away. Sometimes I wait a day or “forget” to respond.
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/24 01:07 AM
2

I agree with you. She can pay for half of it. Get a jeep too. lol. Chick magnet
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/24 10:50 PM
3

I would call it out. She knows exactly what she is doing. She lied to your face man.
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/24 10:40 PM
2

Dude. She still will do it anyway. She may have already. Don’t believe her. Get a lawyer. And document her diagnosis and meds. You need to know what happens in your state. Her game will to keep the beating you into submission. Stand your ground but tactically. You need to leverage everything you know about her and any bad things she has done. Will her parents help you or her? Have you told anyone because you don’t want her to control the narrative. Be careful. Record everything going forward. Sh…
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/24 10:39 PM
5

You need an attorney and then file charges against her and sue her civilly.
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/24 04:59 PM
3

You need to have the list on your head of all the huge negatives with her. Focus on that and say fuck it. My list is about 5 years old but I can rattle them off. Cheater early in marriage 1- lack of sex 2- disrespectful 3- financially irresponsible 4- can’t keep a job 5- always on Facebook 6- never helped me when I was sick 7- everyone was more important than me 8- grass is greener mentality on everything 9-bully and controlling of what I could d Do as a good mom but a crappy wife You need to sl…
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/24 04:56 PM
6

She is lying to you man. And you are financing her degree.
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/24 05:35 PM
20

Dude. You have to shake it off today! First off, There is already another dude in her head if not in the picture. Here is what’s going to happen. She will keep being nice and until bam she is going to hit you again. Be it, surprise I have a lawyer and I want more, or this is my boyfriend and oh no I just met him, I wasn’t dating him before I told you I wanted a divorce. I forgot I emptied that account? Yes y I had to get new cloths and lingerie with the shared crest card She doesn’t respect you.…
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/24 05:33 PM
8

Don’t say shit to her going forward. - no where all the assets/debts are to the penny and change passwords. Set alerts on all accounts - the see lawyer - discuss with them if moving out would have an affect on the judgement. -be prepared for her to call police on you and make claims. Have camera or something ready. If she gets wind of what you’re doing she will clean out accounts and make the accusations and have you out of the house. Don’t underestimate her. Be prepared for the worst case scena…
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/24 04:57 PM
2

This is her only play. She is losing on all fronts. You should show no mercy to protect the kids. Don’t do the wait and see what she does approach. I would threaten her with civil suits and criminal charges.
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/24 08:15 PM
1

Yep. Time to be an asshole. You know you are doing the right thing if she calls you that!
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/24 07:23 PM
3

Tell your self over and over. Fuck it! Fuck her! You’re making the right progress. But since you’re not even divorced yet, it still hangs over you. You need to be an asshole(that’s what she will say) and ignore her communication for 24 hours. She is not important anymore. When you do reply it’s “ok, no, yes, idk. I’m busy.” She needs to be way down on your priority list. 1-Kids and you 2-Work 3-Hobbies, gym friends 4-finances 46 - women in general 47 - your ex
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/24 05:03 PM
2

Now call her parents and let them know. Control the narrative. Protect yourself! Hopefully all the assets are protected and you have alerts. Jilted wives like to clean out accounts and rack up credit cards. Phase 2 is they call the cops on you and slander you with outlandish lies of abuse and whatever.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 11:50 PM
1

This day and age. I wouldn’t say shit unless you have the lawyer ready, camera ready, assets protected, a place to live, and you already told your family.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 11:47 PM
2

But of course they do. You can use the mirror tactic. Do what she does until she realizes you will keep it up until she shuts the f up.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 11:21 PM
1

Use fast divorce as much as you can to your advantage! She is dead to you. Don’t feel disrespected. Feel like you are dodging a bullet. Time to grind on career man. Start stacking up your assets. Do you have a lawyer?
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 10:53 PM
21

It’s a trick. She has an end game. She is laying out these tactics for something. Stay the course and double freedom rockets to her. Could be she is going to ask for money? Or disguise it as the kids need? But also remember she has a brain washed head that she has repeated her bull shit revisioned story that she did nothing wrong blah blah blah. But she also thinks you’re weak. So when the Medusa reveals itself, you know what to do.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 01:44 AM
26

Dude. This is called the self brainwash. She needs to make up shit so she can repeat said shit to everyone and she gets to a point she actually will believe it. She has to have rehearsed story for friends and dates. Don’t listen to her gibberish. Look at her actions . Don’t waste any time communicating with her forever if you can help it.
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/24 03:43 PM
3

Call more lawyers and consult. Don’t show her shit. Wait for lawyer. Don’t contact anyone for now. In laws you should tell now. She has probably already told some shit sandwich of a story. Be vague but say she is a cheater. Probably should talk to a counselor about your child.
/r/Divorce_Men29/03/24 06:27 PM
3

You have to be ruthless man. The kids need to be with you primarily.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 11:46 PM
7

Very common bro. This is her twisted reality in her head that she repeats over and over and really believes this horse shit.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 11:44 PM
5

Don’t let her into your house man! You don’t feel safe. By the way. When you’re not there. She can tell the teacher you cheated and hit her and abused her. Teacher has no idea what the truth is. That’s the motive. Whatever fucking narrative they want to spin. Protect there image.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 09:29 PM
3

Get a great lawyer. Keep the high ground by staying on the offensive with moving quickly. She will probably drag it out. You may have to inventory. Change your will and life insurance.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/24 01:16 AM
3

Just say no. Court is not going to want to change agreement that she agreed to. Consult an attorney. My ex said all sorts of shit she wanted to change. I saw a lawyer and he said the court is not going to agree to any of it, and in fact she violated the out of pocket expenses. She then changed her tune 180 degrees. You should bring up everything that she has been bull shit and not following agreement
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/24 09:21 PM
-1

Watch strong successful male on YouTube.
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/24 05:57 PM
5

You sound simpish and defeated. And probably working too much. But it’s grind time to save money/career. You need to do a 180. Get focused and be a man. She needs to do her part in the marriage but you have to be the leader. It doesn’t sound like you’re being the leader. You need to take over. If she doesn’t like it, say fuck it and when can she move out. You’re not supposed to be the man she wants to be. Fuck that. Just be the man and the leader. You will be surprised what happens. Right now sh…
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/24 05:53 PM
7

If he looks and is vigilant for red flags, and checks his wife when she is not cool. He could have a good marriage or he can get out soon as anything shady starts.
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/24 01:38 PM
1

Move your valuables or hobby/sports gear out of the house. Family preferably or storage but have insurance if valuable Make sure she doesn’t have your spare vehicle key. I would squirrel away some cash for emergencies, a couple grand somewhere safe. Change passwords on everything. Put alerts on accounts as needed. Know to the penny where you stand on all assets and debts.
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/24 03:58 AM
8

Stupid choice by her that affects and endangers the child. They will grow up thinking oh yeah, just trust a new guy after a month or two. So that means he is sleeping at the house I may guess. I believe 100% it was a stick it to you. That guy most likely was “I really don’t want to go…….” unless he has been seeing her before divorce, and then he is a dirt bag. You can take the high road, be indifferent to her. If she starts talking about him, say not interested and hang up. I’m an asshole, if sh…
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/24 03:21 PM
1

She has no respect for you. Doesn’t love you- look at her actions. You are simping and not the guy you used to be. Time to say fuck it. It’s over. Time to be an asshole and mirror her behavior. Don’t respond to her for at least 1 days via phone or text. Just say been busy. Don’t giver her any free assets. Don’t be a doormat, because that’s what she thinks you are. Watch strong successful male on you tube.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/24 08:34 PM
6

I would sue her in small claims court.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/24 06:32 PM
3

You’re out of the house and she is hunting for the next dumb ass. She will find out that single mom with kids is more of a pump and dump target. You’re in your prime still man. Hit the gym and kick aZz on your career and being a dad. Master your finances and investments. Take a class or play sport during a free week night. You can use it to meet people or blow of steam.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/24 12:40 AM
3

Time for battle. She is delusional and projecting. She is crazy and my guess she has his money from you.
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/24 01:56 AM
2

Start protecting you daughters by divorce. Shes sleeping around and you are stuck in woe is me. Put in the chain mail and grab a battle axe. It’s time
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/24 06:23 PM
3

She knows this. So you should absolutely demand something in return. This helps set the precedent going forward . Remember she is going to try to fuck you over on every deal for a long time, she will sell ut as something else , but she is thinking 2 steps ahead of you. My ex threatened me with court 4 years after divorce. I consulted a lawyer for free. He said you shouldn’t agree to any of that shit, there’s nothing in it for you and the courts will not support her demands. And she violated the …
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/24 04:33 PM
1

You give her $1000 a month. You get the kids on the taxes. Make a trade of equal value. Or You keep $12000 in retirement funds that come off the table. In general don’t do anything you do t want to though. I let my kids stay in the home. It did benefit them as in school district.
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/24 03:47 PM
1

Sounds like you need to speak to a doctor or try some over the counter supplements to bump you up a little more. Little changes add up. Night time the hardest? Life is hard. I work a job I don’t enjoy but it is better than the last one and I make more money to help myself and the kids college. Try to add so more activities to your week. Like a regular wed night sport or club or hobby. Coed volleyball? Or a class on how to be a better cook? Brainstorm the shit out of it. I need this as well, I hu…
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/24 03:46 PM
8

Tough decision. She had an affair early on. She financially hamstrung us the entire time, I think she was fired 3 times from jobs as well. There is so much shit to unpack with everything, losing your identity to make wife happy, the shitty bedroom…. We were on the brink of divorce. I was unsure, totally in the middle. I was unhappy for many years but we have kids. So I looked at her phone to get a glimpse into what she was feeling, give me nudge one way or another. Texts to her friends joking ab…
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/24 02:08 PM
3

Yep. Write the divorce plan and work the divorce plan. Really dot the i’s. Detailed list of assets and debts. Alerts on accounts. Change your passwords. Detail detail detail.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/24 10:20 PM
2

Don’t tell her shit.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/24 10:17 PM
2

No rush bud. First just get to indifferent about her. It takes 2 for a marriage. You own your shit and she did not. You are a good man, she is not. That which does not kill us, makes us stronger. No go kick aZz in your career. You are in your prime! Watch Conan the Barbarian. Captain America civil war. Get amped up. Get fit eat right and get your head 100%.
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/24 09:02 PM
2

What is going on your head when you knew she was sleeping with the other guy? She was bad mouthing you. She lied to you daily. She risked your life and health by possible giving you a std/covid/health issues. She used your finances to f around. Buying cloths and perfume for other guys, not you. She was probably trying to figure out how to screw you over in divorce. You my man are exactly where she wanted to leave you. Do what are you going to do about it?
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/24 12:09 PM
10

Dude. Just walk. She is not who you thought she was. She was probably screwing around for a short time and then got dumped so sex was back on. You being a simp, letting her walk all over you will keep her doing this. Be a man and kick her to the curb. Her actions show you she doesn’t love you. Don’t listen to her words. She saw a lawyer. Come on!
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/24 12:03 PM
7

Divorce first and you can still give her a shot. Or post nup agreent if she does x and then…..
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 11:50 PM
5

Yes. It’s a trick. It’s like the movie Army of Darkness They thought they killed the undead witch. Last second before the guy checks the body, Bruce Campbells character says “It’s a trick, get a axe.” And yeah the bitch gets up and starts attacking.
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/24 11:06 PM
22

Stop simping. She is already banging new guys. You remind her of what a shitty person she is ( I assume she did something because you said forgiving). Which goes against the narrative she tells herself and new guys that you were controlling and abusive. Start being indifferent to her.
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/24 10:56 PM
20

1- Don’t tell her shit. 2- She was dicking around before divorce guarantee. It’s how most women operate.
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/24 11:57 PM
6

Pay money to “good” lawyer to save money. If she is going to be a douche and would let every one know what she did. This will drive her insane and put her on the defensive of her actions and lack of accountability. Control control control the narrative! Call her parents and just nice knowing you, I would never thought she would be a cheater and a liar.
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/24 11:51 PM
3

Yeah it’s mental. I was good to go and happy to hit new stuff. But I couldn’t finish (divorce and want final. Totally in my head. Try some over the counter stuff of the blue pill. L arginine works. Nugenix you can buy in Walgreens. Nitrous oxide ? Main ingredient works well.
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/24 06:31 PM
7

You need to have a divorce plan that you are not going to be living at the house when you tell her with friend/relatives present. Slowly move super important /valuable stuff into storage or with family when you start the plan. You should no your assets etc front and backwards and have alerts on accounts. Rejected women clean out accounts and call the cops. That’s why you need witnesses.
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/24 06:26 PM
4

2 years marriage I would tell her to fuck off to alimony and lawyer fees. Tell the lawyer to be as mean as they want. lawyer should Know best. She abandoned the home. Sometimes when you have hard evidence from professionals …. Judges like it because it’s not just someone saying something.
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/24 08:40 PM
3

Lawyer says? What a private investigator proving she is cohabiting?
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/24 08:34 PM
2

You could help her with college? Or you could not if she continues to act this way……
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 11:50 PM
2

If you have money. You hire a lawyer to threaten her with cease and desist or you all take her to court for defamation.
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 11:45 PM
2

A forensic accountant might be worth it.
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 11:36 PM
7

There comes a point in time where you stop taking the fing high road. Start thinking about your ex’s history of mistakes/failures and how can you leverage it. Things she has never told her parents? Any arrests? Mental episodes? Cheater? Liar obviously. Can’t hold a job? Fired from jobs? Addictions? Taxes? An Achilles for women is there image/social media. Just brain storm. Keep the plan legal. What you’re doing is not working right. Other ideas: Can you buy her? Instead of the lawyers taking mon…
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 11:17 PM
19

If your little voice is saying something is up and it bothers the shit out of you, but you don’t have all the facts. Little voice is always right, shady shit is going on. Your body knows she is lying but your mind is saying but I don’t have proof so then I’ll wait. Whenever you’re in the shit I say go at your wife like a swat team drug raid and see what happens.
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 07:47 PM
7

Hey. That is actually is a good outcome. What women usually do is keep seeing you and bang their ex. Then months later you figure it out something is up and call her on it. Next time do not spend every other day with a woman. Once maybe twice a week. And do not go exclusive for awhile, and only if she brings it up do you think about it.
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 03:11 PM
5

Court manners 100%. Say good morning your honor, yes your honor. Don’t interrupt anyone. But don’t be afraid to make your case. Your honor may be allowed to speak to this? Make sure you have all the evidence in 3 copies. Judge, you and the ex.
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 03:43 AM
1

Nope you’re fine. You have to keep providing for the kids and yourself. I can’t do it either. I work and commute 60+ hours a week. I do have them for t,w dinners.
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 12:36 AM
2

Hire some help. Even if it’s a little bit. See a therapist or dr. See if there is something. To help you temporarily. One small step brother. And then another. You have to fing protect your kids!
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 12:33 AM
9

Dude. Be a man and kick aZz. You are in your prime! She is not. Put your battle plans together and execute quickly and effectively. Treat leaving her a business deal you need to win. The kids, still be a great dad. She is not in love. She is disrespectful to you. Always look at a woman’s actions. Probably cheating or about to. Just a head up. How the fuck did she hide $50k in debt from you man?
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 12:25 AM
6

Time for a lawyer man.
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/24 12:48 PM
5

At this point a social media embarrassment is the only thing that she would freak out about. But then She would lie her azz off as they do with everything.
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/24 05:09 PM
3

Yep. That is why she is out of The house
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/24 11:57 PM
1

Just trying to snap you out of it man. I have been there. Women will hide a lot and then only trickle truth you. And it sucks to hurt and know very little about what is going on. Women talk to everyone! Except there spouse in times like these. You don’t have to do anything I suggest. But the phone holds all the secrets.
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/24 09:14 PM
3

First off women think ahead. She wants you to believe her story. But reality is she planned the day and how she was going to tell you. Do yourself a favor and look at her phone. See what she is saying to her friends. See what she is saying in all her messages. Check her deleted photos and photos. Check what kinds of apps she has. You could check what kind of apps she has downloaded. Anyway check it and see why is really going on, I would say there is a 90% chance you find out some really bad shi…
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/24 04:56 AM
3

Use the dating apps. Just use it as entertainment and little expectations. Sign up for a class at night once a week. Bit college but a community class that’s sounds interesting. You will meet people. If you like sports like I do (little old now) Play in league. There is so much out there. Yeah you have to pay for a class and a league. But the 2 nights a week you have to look forward to something you like or want to learn.
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/24 12:21 AM
2

If you can get her to sign that. So what about alimony and child support?
/r/Divorce_Men29/02/24 09:01 PM
7

Based on posts I don’t see a road back for talking or anything for that matter. Her actions say everything you need to know. I hope she is paying support. Get her off your life insurance.
/r/Divorce_Men29/02/24 02:38 PM
17

Most women leave when they have another guy(or woman) they are seeing before divorce man. Many guys don’t see it and want to say I don’t think she cheated when reality is like 90% it’s in some form texting, emotional and physical. So take her off the pedestal she was never to be on. Be sad, be mad, whatever. But work out! This helps tremendously your mental health. You’re in your earning prime and lots of life to go. She on the other hand is not.
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/24 04:07 PM
1

1-It would only get worse. 2-you only caught her in some white lies. You have no idea! It’s always much much worse than you think. Unless you sneak and deep dive her phone/computer.
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/24 12:36 AM
4

My suggestion is go back to how you were before kids, before you met her. Be that guy. Then tell her what she has to do and check any bullshit that she puts up. If she chooses not to do things like sex, reduce spending, get a job. Then you have a choice to. Get divorced.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/24 10:21 PM
1

Can you record her comments and behavior? Then- You talk to your boss. Second - you talk to a lawyer Then talk to your family. If you can’t do a lawyer you have to figure out where are you going to live and securing 50% of the assets. When you announce divorce it makes no sense to stay in the same house.. While your there your wide open to abuse claims, police calls, etc. -anything Jonnie or valuable to you I would get it out of the house before hand - you should stash some emergency cash in saf…
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/24 07:14 PM
2

They always cheat with the new guy before leaving. That’s how they operate. This guy is no winner either, but he will take advantage of her and bail. I would keep the dog and to get bent.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/24 12:48 AM
7

Hahahahahahaha! What comes around goes around
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/24 12:09 AM
2

I’m pretty confident that A fling during separation and a lot of mistakes really means you cheated on him during the marriage. Double red flag whammy that you’re a gym rat/nurse and he is military. If you are heavy into selfie IG than that would be the trifecta. My best advice is divorce amicably and ask him to try again but stay divorced. So either one of you could walk away and not go through the divorce shit again.
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/24 02:44 PM
22

First off Stop chasing her to fix it. She doesn’t respect you and doing the baby please pushes her away. If she wants a divorce she doesn’t love you. Be a man and a leader. File for divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/24 05:23 AM
5

Get separate plans.
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/24 12:28 AM
2

What about state services to help her? I don’t know what her limitations are and the extent of her condition. No assets you should probably try to it as cheaply as possible. Alimony depends on years married.
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/24 09:41 PM
2

Is she paying for her own living expenses. You know wives move out to screw other guys, you know that right?
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/24 03:39 PM
8

Haha. Run to the exit man. Just heard a story on strong successful male o you tube. Same thing. Marriage talk right away.
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/24 02:49 PM
12

What are the boundaries? Have you looked at her phone? Everyone is better off in divorce. The kids know a lot more than you think. You should probably just start planning a 1 year divorce plan. Gives you time to arrange assets. Cause she is going to hammer you.
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/24 12:04 AM
1

First off. If she is in her phone that much… You should take a look it and see what she is doing. I would start there. Look at it when she is asleep. Next see some attorneys and settle on one that that anticipates what your wife will do. I’m pretty confident she will try to rake you over since she doesn’t have a job yet. Women can get away with a lot and the judge won’t do anything. She could file to have the assets frozen. Call the cops on you. Etc. Start looking at the assets and finances and …
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/24 07:06 PM
2

How many kids? 2 or 3? Not sure it was clear. You will be on the hook for more than $500. More like $500 a kid.
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/24 03:25 PM
3

For me Not as bad as that. Lol. But you are fine. Hopefully you can laugh about and have no permanent issues from it. Like babies or std’s.
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/24 03:21 PM
1

Maybe do a combination of all of these: - home equity loan $25k - pay some big bills with credit card $10k And then transfer to a 0% credit card - ask for a loan from family. $15k -? payment plan to ex (I know that sucks) You avoid child support? Are you primary custody? Work a cash side hustle and maybe you can bank $5k a year off that and help with expenses.
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/24 03:13 PM
6

She will never stop. You have to figure out how to stop feeding her whatever she is looking for to feed off of. 4 kids unfortunately feed her a lot of info. If you can afford to, maybe hire someone to help you with the kids weekly and step in when you have to go to an appt. Then you don’t have to ask her.
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/24 03:01 PM
1

Does she work?
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/24 11:39 PM
2

You can look into securing some assets on a trusts. But you need to see a really good lawyer and a divorce accountant. Use the evidence as leverage at the last possible moment. That you will send her family a packet of materials etc.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/24 11:38 PM
2

-You’re going to have to put some legwork in to find an attorney that will help you pro bono. -Can you stash some cash away each week? $5. $10. Whatever. If you plan to divorce ina year maybe you can at least have $1000 emergency cash. Look at the expenses and see where you can cut down. Cell phones (insurance, data plan). You could get a 0% transfer balance credit card. Put the lawyer fees on a card and then move it to the O%. Once you are out of the house you can do side Halle For cash when yo…
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/24 09:40 PM
2

She is going to start high. You also have medical and dental benefits. When does support stop for your state? College exp. She is going to try to add stuff like cell phones that you pay in addition to. I would see (after she gives you a number) If you could lump so out of the alimony.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/24 12:49 PM
4

I would Never do it, but just to fuck with your ex in the beginning, say I’m just going to take my child 1 weekend a month. So basically 95/5. They would freak out. You’re like, I’m paying child support. What’s the issue. lol. I only have my kids about 40%. I have to have a place for them, food, meds, etc. But I have to pay for that and money for them over there. (Alimony and child support). The money I pay pays for them, the mortgage, all the utilities, her car payment….. Yeah and I pay medical…
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/24 12:40 PM
4

Yes they do. She is delusional.
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/24 09:29 PM
1

Well. Hard to help when don’t know the reasons or damage is.
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/24 09:27 PM
1

Yep. She will. And ask for receipts .
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/24 02:44 PM
2

Take the lead. The longer she stalls the longer you pay. Start changing passwords.. put alerts on accounts. Open up a new account with your name only. Put some in there for Emergencies. Direct deposit to new axcount. Basically start making a to do list and work the list. Don’t sit back. Because when she makes a move it will be without warning. And she will say oh I saw a lawyer and they said ……. And you will be on the defensive the rest of the way. Have you looked at her phone to see what she is…
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/24 02:38 PM
3

You might want to consult more attorneys that has more confidence in their answers. I would negotiate not taking on her debt. Otherwise y oh want half the shit she bought. 3 years and a prenup. She had to have come into the marriage with debt.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 11:51 PM
2

Dude. It went sideways because there is another man. Women seprate so they can finally do it and not be worried about being caught. How many times I have heard I don’t think she was cheating….. and guess what… they were. You need to man up. Stop talking I love her so much, I secretly hope…… look at her actions. She left you before she moved man. Actions! Take the ring off and sell it. Put in social-“ hey I got $500 for my ring and used to buy a jeep.” Focus on career. Focus on your health. Focus…
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 11:45 PM
8

Never bring up a relationship on your end. Let them do it. I would stay away from ( just off the top) - if her friends are single and focused on riding sausage/clubbing. - she admits to mental illness history - has male best friend or lots of male friends- “allegedly just friends” - on her phone a lot when with you - does only fans or lots of instagram selfies - feminist
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 11:30 PM
16

Rule number 1: She is only admitting to the minimum. Also, usually a woman “comes clean” because someone is threatening them to do it or they will. You should ask to look at her phone and go through it on a deep dive. Rule number 2: she is making a move for a reason. Either the threatened to come clean or she is thinking she sticks out a year or two she can take more assets (the house you spoke of) I would go forward with divorce and move out. Consult an attorney. Watch her actions not her words…
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 07:43 PM
–

Divorce her. But she needs to pay child support. Good riddance to the cinder block chained to your legs.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 12:39 AM
1

Stop looking for a relationship! Date for fun with no expectation. Focus on career, assets, friends, sports and hobbies. Then women if time. The more you are indifferent to women and focus on yourself- the more it drives to you.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 12:35 AM
9

Dude. Reading between the lines she was doing this guy before she left. I guarantee it. That night she left, she went to this dude. You need stop pining. Be a man, move forward. She’s a cheater , liar and takes no accountability. Most powerful move you can make is be silent and walk away from her. Hit the gym, kick ass at work, focus on your career and grind out income/assets. You got married to young. Watch strong successful male on you tube. Your story you will see is common.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 12:33 AM
3

Step 1. Find a good lawyer that can speak to your particular issues. Step 2 . Pay lawyer and do what they say. Step 3. Move your valuables out of the house slowly and into storage or family. Change passwords on everything. Put alerts on all accounts. Have emergency cash available. Make sure you have all your car keys: Get some recording cameras etc. be prepared for the worst. Always always call police if she does weird shit. Make sure she doesn’t know you called at first. Police reports are good…
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 10:57 PM
6

She is full of shi!. Tried to play you and sabotage your happiness. Did she try to call you on Valentine’s Day at night when you were with your gf? lol. Her actions show you the truth. She doesn’t love you.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 10:52 PM
6

Dude her actions show you she doesn’t love you. She is stalling. Complete the divorce and you can see if you can still be a couple but divorce. I’m telling you it’s a tactic. If she stalls, you have to keep contributing to expenses, debt etc. she can then get a lawyer and start trying to come up with a plan that benefits her the most. Right now you have the upper hand and her on the defensive. I would keep the high ground. See what she says when you say no to counseling. I bet she turns on you w…
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 04:20 PM
0

Unfortunately with assets you have you must see a lawyer. I would consult quite a few to find the right one. Your wife is going to try all the shit in the book once the shit hits the fan. Your home work is to look into all assets and account numbers etc to have nice complete list for the lawyer. Because she will start moving as soon as you announce divorce (she may have last time to be honest) Her goal will to avoid giving you anything and have you pay child support. She will rather pay someone …
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/24 04:29 PM
1

File a complaint against her with the courts. It shouldn’t cost that much.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/24 01:54 PM
4

Hopefully a prenup?
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/24 01:46 PM
1

Mine did. at a-point I took ownership for my part and she still took none. I realized I was so unhappy with her continued actions or. Lack of over the years, in the bedroom, financially, work, family and friends that I wanted the divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/24 01:39 PM
17

Stop simping about it. Stop trying to convince her. Be the best dad. Kick ass at work. Kick ass on your health, gym. Be a man. Take charge of your life and be the leader for your kids. Let your wife be a spectator. Believe it or not, soon as you flip the switch from simp to leader. Women’s perspectives change. They always come back, but once you clear your head and get mentally right you may not want her back.
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/24 06:18 PM
1

That’s good. Sounds like the pros out weight the cons. But I would know all assets to the penny. She gets wind she will start hiding assets and start the false accusations route. Happens a lot.
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/24 07:47 PM
1

Comes a time you may have to file a lawsuit against her. Usually the police catch up with bananas like her. Tell her to where a foil hat, that should stop it. Lol
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/24 07:46 PM
5

Unfortunately the past she doesn’t exist anymore. My last 10 years sucked so it’s hard to look back and want that, except for when my kids were young. It was a very happy time with kids.
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/24 07:42 PM
1

There is a lot of things she can do but she chooses not to. Trying something once is not trying to fix it. So you have to make your choice. But wouldn’t stay because of the kid. You should consult a lawyer. Years of marriage plays a role in alimony. I hope she is working!
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/24 06:49 PM
6

Absolutely!
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/24 06:46 PM
6

Can’t you file with the court that she has violated the order? And also mail the court documents to the bank in question.
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/24 08:35 PM
2

Her plan was to drag it out. Usually More time means you have to keep supporting her as married. While she does whatever and plots against you to take more assets, turn your kids against you. Daddy sent us away. Text book plan for most ex’s. Was she working? Did you cut her off when she left the country?
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/24 03:19 PM
3

She will get hers. What comes around goes around. 2 cheaters thinking it’s going to work out lol. Keep communication about kids only. She starts saying my job blah blah - I don’t fucking care. Keep it to the fucking kids. Otherwise I wouldn’t even talk to you. Don’t respond to texts till the next day. Or not at all sometimes. Definitely don’t answer the phone when the kids are with you. Basically I just postpone communication as long as I can. Training her to leave me the fuck alone on stupid sh…
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/24 03:16 PM
1

Have great court manners. Say good morning your honor if addressed. Yes your honor. May I expand my answer your honor. Don’t interrupt anyone. Let her interrupt, talk stupid, and roll her eyes. Judges use this to weight character somewhat. It may or may not impact the outcome.
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/24 02:39 AM
4

Because you screwed her plan up.
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/24 02:34 AM
5

Don’t be afraid when close to pull out and finish your self or she can.
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/24 12:15 AM
1

My bad. I did miss she changed her mind lol. I’m not a fan of conceding assets (maintenance) unless you get a better deal on something else. But if it excels the divorce I can see that as a big pro.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/24 11:45 PM
2

She wasn’t bad enough for me but help. Lol. I have kids. I wouldn’t visit her in the hospital though.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/24 11:42 PM
1

If she signed a document that she would get a full time job and if she doesn’t her alimony would be reduced, then I would.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/24 11:35 PM
4

Skip the separation man. Look at her actions not her words. She doesn’t love you. Separation extends you paying for more and her dating life. You want to pay 50% of that?
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/24 11:34 PM
3

Tell her mom that her daughter is taking her grand daughter to meet men.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/24 12:12 PM
9

Be careful. Rejection drives them crazy and they keep coming back. Tell her you lost the receipt and the warranty is expired on her. Best to just toss her ass in the trash.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/24 12:20 AM
3

Have hard evidence. Texts, emails, whatever. Judges believe evidence. You should systematically disprove every bulls hit statement.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/24 12:03 AM
4

You’re not living with her? Right. To stop a clown show you need to. See a lawyer and have them send a letter that you will sue for defamation.
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/24 09:45 PM
3

Is it your night with the kids? Is she trying to worm her way into the night?
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/24 06:30 PM
3

Have someone else over to record the shit show if she comes. She starts being a freak call the cops.
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/24 01:35 AM
8

Jesus Christ man no! wtf! She is a liar She is a cheater She is selfish She doesn’t respect you She doesn’t love you Because of her actions.
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/24 01:07 AM
9

If she is done, -she has already has a guy in the wings or has secretly started cheating. - or plans on riding a sausage carousel (or has already started that as well). I advise you check her phone. She has a plan. She is 3 steps ahead of you. Don’t be friends. That’s bull shit. Don’t be a nice guy. Don’t be a doormat. Go to a lawyer and get primary custody!
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/24 12:55 AM
2

Fuxk that. Divorce now. Don’t let he stall things. Don’t help. Don’t talk to her.make 50% of the wedding money. Change all your passwords. Keep going to gym. You dodge a bullet with her!
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/24 11:38 AM
7

Lawyer now! Like Monday! She is going to try every dirty trick to reduce alimony and hide assets. She probably already has. Next comes the false accusations and saying she wants primary custody. Do not fuck around and hesitate.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 10:05 PM
11

Dude she hooked up before you split. Wake up bro. You never know what they have been up to unless you have all the evidence. You can assume the worst and she is the worst. She is trash now. Move forward and leave her on the curb for Monday morning trash pickup.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 10:02 PM
8

First off stop simping. Be a man. Say fuck it. Her actions show you what she means. She has another guy already lined up. Women make the move when they have a new guy already. If you missed the chance to go through her phone… because all the bullshit will be there. Don’t let separation stall divorce. Move forward. You can get back together and be divorced. But my guess when things started going South in marriage she started looking for an exit and a guy. Stop communication! Divorce. Mean it. She…
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 05:28 PM
5

Don’t back for the kids. Go forward.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 04:54 PM
1

Lock down that assets and passwords. Jilted women liked to clean out accounts. You said it first so she will strike back. Guaranteed.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 01:29 AM
1

What evidence does she have? You might want to hire a criminal lawyer And sue her.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 01:28 AM
1

Consult an attorney man. The wills stuff could be a distraction. There is always an end game motive for women. Don’t proceed with the wills. She knows exactly what she is doing. You want to know what she is thinking. Go through her phone.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 01:24 AM
3

Dude. I didn’t get an invite! Glad you’re doing well man. 🤘
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 12:07 AM
2

Lawyer consult first. Get an overview for your state. Then you can say my lawyer stated this is how it usually goes and that’s not going to happen- when she says she wants your testicles. If you make 150k and have assets don’t cheap out. She is going to immediately go with a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 10:05 PM
1

That’s a win man.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 09:57 PM
3

2 year old yeah that sounds good. Once he is older do some dad son stuff.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 09:56 PM
2

Consult a Freaking Lawyer. You should have a clear understanding about alimony and child support in your state. Women usually win by default primary custody. So where will you live and have enough room for the kids to stay over? Don’t be nice and give her free assets. Negotiate fairly.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 06:16 PM
1

No
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 06:13 PM
3

Yes- screw her. Don’t rush to do taxes. File for an extension lol. How does child support payment tie into her employment? She needs to go on state assistance and get wic or food stamps. Fucking bullshit. If she is going to be like this, I would file in court every fucking time she doesn’t follow the agreement. You don’t need a lawyer to file a failure to abide by agreement. Pay a fee. Just have all the evidence 100% so it’s a slam dunk. If she screwed you on anything else take her to small clai…
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 05:11 PM
5

Sounds like she didn’t work?
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 02:20 PM
28

Dude. That’s how 90% women operate. They already have another dumbass lined up. You need to watch strong successful male. Women operate under the same manual. Find new guy before dumping existing guy. Claim existing guy is controlling and abusive. New dumbass buys bullshit story.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 02:19 PM
4

She is Ass from the past brother!
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/24 02:23 AM
1

I hope you’re getting child support man. Don’t let her off the hook for anything, money or behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/24 04:23 PM
2

Dude. 1-They are protecting that the bills getting paid the husband. Funding their lifestyle. 2-They are protecting their social image. 3-They are protecting their status of mom to the children instead of cheater/liar. 5- The longer they stay married the more assets they get from the courts.
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/24 02:56 PM
1

It’s a ploy. Just like you withdrew the complaint and got screwed. There is a screw you moment planned behind the scenes for you. Maybe this time she puts you in jail with false accusations?
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/24 02:16 PM
3

Pull the bandaid off fast. Get a lawyer and work out a detailed plan. Work the plan. Don’t file until you are 100% ready. Like where are you going to live and how is custody going to work with you in the af. Don’t let your daughter grow up seeing a shit show marriage. It’s better to be separate.
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 12:12 AM
3

Just don’t get married! Have female companionship. No rings! Your assets are your assets. Lol
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 12:06 AM
2

The most powerful move a guy can make is to walk away and not say anything. Drives women ape shit. That’s what you want because it distracts them from being a cun!.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 08:57 PM
2

Do you have all Documentation of her addition. Police reports, hospital reports, ambulance bills. You want open shut case to have primary custody. Don’t assume. Have the evidence stacked high!
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 04:12 PM
4

Jointly if you want to pay less. Both names will be on check. You’re still legally married. ‘Most lawyers will say speak to an accountant.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 04:10 PM
1

Along with the job plan the hobbies/sports. I played basketball in a league for 20 years until Covid hit. Also side hustle for cash is a good distraction if you need extra income. I would look at hobbies and sports that you meet people.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 02:49 PM
2

What’s your plan to where you are going to live? Own or lease?
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 02:21 AM
2

From a financial stand point, I would stack cash while you can. But also keep looking for a new place you can afford and having the “word” out among your circle you would be looking. You never know, you may get lucky with something. Do you split time 50/50 or something where you do not have your kid full time. If you do you could house sit at times you don’t have your kid and be out of the house and make money. What was the crux that ended the marriage?
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 12:18 AM
1

Right now If there was no witnesses, police weren’t called, no marks it would be hard to prove from other side. Just get out.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 12:10 AM
2

Are you divorced and living together?
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 11:20 PM
2

The ex wife there too?
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 11:19 PM
1

Can you close that business and start a new llc? Sounds like you need a lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 11:09 PM
2

Can you change decor? Will this help you bank some money for the move?
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 11:07 PM
1

Don’t stay with crazy. It just going to go down hlll.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 11:02 PM
4

Dude. Just walk away and so no more. Get lawyer and don’t talk to her anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 11:01 PM
2

Any leverage? Addictions? Scripts? DUI? History she doesn’t want anyone to know? You let anyone know about her cheating. Kids know? Moot point if she has dirt on you. Or you set up a sting…. (I’m 57 so I remember the movie lol) would a Private investigator be able to get any dirt on her. You make really good money should be able to afford it. And if you need an asst I’m looking to make more money. lol.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 10:45 PM
0

What does your lawyer say?
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 10:33 PM
2

Yeah that’s a big catalyst- the convo on love/future. And yes it is odd about Christmas. He could have taken that as a red flag.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 10:23 PM
2

Didn’t Florida just end lifetime alimony She is trying to work you over.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 06:35 PM
2

Tell her fuck that. Get a new lawyer. The only way I would pay is up front payment and no alimony at all after that. She just wants to be paid in case you pass away. Make sure you have a marriage and cohabitation clause that you can reduce if she shacks up
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 06:34 PM
2

Can you pin point a catalyst that happened?’ Anything big happen. Not enough information to really say anything to. Couple of things -if you were the first relationship after he might have decided I don’t want to continue. - he might have saw some red flags in you and he is ending it this way. - he is spread to thin with kid, career, family, and gf.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 06:31 PM
1

Did you come out with no alimony?
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 06:27 PM
2

I’m going to try magnesium. I also say a vid on magnesium oil on your feet before bed is very effective
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 06:26 PM
3

You give in once she will keep fucking you over.! She is angling to make sure she doesn’t have to pay you alimony. Judges know bullshit when they see it. Her fake loans will not stand up. Listen to your lawyer. Take time to think what you will accept in the end. I would use alimony as leverage and the say fine no alimony but I get blank.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 06:19 PM
6

My opinion Meet a lawyer this week! Her Actions is her plan. She is stringing you along. She is probably dating. And she has plan for when to divorce as she gets the assets in line and her plan in place. Right now you help finance her still and the kids. Quit simping to her. Do the opposite. Be the leader. Say if this is how it is then fuck it. Take actions towards divorce for your self. Work out like a beast. Be a great dad. Focus on work and protecting assets.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 06:15 PM
2

You prepare for the worst. You need to start thinking about where you will live. How will you pay for it. Space for the kids. It’s rough. Especially if you cheated. That is very difficult to deal with, I hung in there along time but always ate at me What she did.
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/24 11:05 PM
5

I would still use a lawyer. Let them get you rolling on a good plan . I would wait to server her till she gets the job. But I would start securing assets and debt. Meaning change all Passwords. Start looking at every account you have and setting alerts, plan to change beneficiary etc. you might want to open new accounts in your existing banking to move money slowly to plan for the exit. Are your credit cards separate?
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/24 04:52 PM
5

She still sounds mentally unstable. Get the hell away from her. It’s too late. Be the leader and kick aZz. Tell her to fuck off and get a lawyer. Document all her shit. Know what meds she is taking. This is war to protect the kiddo. No nice guy shit.
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/24 02:05 PM
1

Once you start the process you can’t really do those things. Moving to another country might work. That much assets. Get a lawyer. A good female one. Depending on the state , there is other things you can do.
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/24 01:46 PM
3

Most of the time if the house was bought before marriage it is not touchable- in most states. Consult an attorney though. If you’re trying to protect $500,000 asset, spend $3000.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 08:01 PM
2

Well this year say “I really appreciate it! I always thought you were smoking hot. Stop by some time and we can sweaty for a few hours.” Smooth. lol Btw. They were testing the waters with you.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 07:40 PM
4

Are you ready with protecting your self. Your assets, car and Debt secure? Have you spoken to your family? Have you spoken to her family? I would be ahead of it so the narrative isn’t she flips it on you, which is what she will do.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 04:35 PM
5

You say no. I only do favors so I can ask for In return like when work gets in the way of my time. Unfortunately I feel I do way more favors and still get shit in return.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 04:31 PM
9

Why meet with her if she was an abuser? I would have met with her best friend or another girl friend and see if i could “meet some really good women.” With them. Lol
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 04:29 PM
1

Get Cps and the cops involved. That’s hard evidence. Judges like hard evidence. You have to the authorities involved asap.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 01:59 PM
1

Tell her to get the F out. What the hell are you doing asking us? She wants to use you to finance her life. Come on. Man. I would go see a lawyer. Get it going and serve her. Lock up your assets. Listen to the lawyer. She doesn’t love or respect you. There is nothing to salvage at this point
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 01:57 PM
3

Don’t play nice. She will keep doing whatever no matter what road you take. So if you have leverage use it. Doing what you are no doesn’t work. You need to get her on the defensive.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 01:48 PM
2

Have you started the process? Do you both know you want to divorce or are you taking the preemptive strike first?
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 01:46 PM
1

That much in assets you don’t fucking ask us. Get a good lawyer! If she hates you, she is going to try to f you over by taking the house, wanting child support, keeping her money and wanting some of yours. Be prepared. Stop being a freaking nice guy. She will wipe her feet on you and smile if you don’t have some balls. No free assets. Negotiate it all. Right off the bat when she says the first first stupid request, say fuck that. Also be prepared for abuse allegations/police. Just be ready.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 01:45 PM
1

Why not start with a wedge night dinner.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 01:42 PM
4

First off. You’re being naive that she has nothing going on. Unless you have done a deep dive on her phone and the computer? They almost always forget to clean something up. Women want to leave once they have a new guy, new party plan/sausgae riding that started already, new woman ready to go. You said my son. She is the mother right, but not step mother? Don’t feel bad. She has a complete bs narrative going through her head already that she tells herself over and over to rehearse to tell everyo…
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 01:35 PM
4

You would have to have damnjng hard evidence. DUI, drug use, abondment not coming home basically, video of her saying she doesn’t want the kids. Etc. . Go for primary custodial. But you need to start putting evidence together.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 01:28 PM
3

Personally I would start with tinder. And just have no expectations other than a distraction and maybe you go on some drink dates or get laid. Once you get a feel for the shit show. Then do a couple more apps like hinge/ok Cupid/ or bumble.
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/24 10:14 PM
1

You received a severance package? The courts will probably expect you to find a job. But consult a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/24 10:08 PM
2

They are probably getting it forwarded.
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/24 09:33 PM
2

Nail down all the accounts to eliminate fuckery. Take $100 out of you good guy support until the $500 is paid back.
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/24 06:25 PM
3

Hey man. Glass half full. Be happy she found another dumb ass so she will leave you alone. Then she we unleash her inner cun! On him.
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/24 06:22 PM
8

Move forward in divorce as fast as you can. If she starts saying but blah blah…. You literally say , “No. fuck it I’m done with this bullshit. Now get the rest of your shit out of here.”
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/24 01:49 AM
16

Finding myself, best life = She wants to ride a bunch of dick. If you are not living with her she already started
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/24 12:57 AM
18

Wait till you’re 30 to get married and have a prenup if you decide to get married. I advise against it. Giant Red flags - Do not marry - not applying for and not securing a good job based on their degree. - gets fired from a job (not laid off) - especially if HR related - asks you to pay for her graduate school - talks about ex boyfriends and repeats the fing stories over and over. - she pretty much transitioned to starfish in bed -wants to see a doctor for everything. Take a pill to fix it. -as…
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/24 09:46 PM
7

Stop taking the high road. Start saying fuck no. Ex’s just keep trying bulldozer you until you give up. Don’t have any leverage? Any knowledge of her history that she doesn’t want anyone to know about. Fight back. Can you push for court? She will keep being a douche no matter what you do.
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/24 03:01 PM
1

They will implode soon. Neither one of them will trust each other. Lol. He won’t want to pay for anything so we will bail.
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/24 02:29 PM
3

When your not sick hit the gym. It’s great for your mental health.
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/24 02:28 PM
2

The hotties want you to have assets, Money, travel, and looks. If you don’t have the assets. If your profile doesn’t hint at that then.. The 11th graders on apps, so cool pictures is what gets them. Just be an asshole when texting. Lol. Do the exact opposite of whatever you’re saying. A friend of mine did okay on hinge.
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/24 12:40 AM
9

That’s what they do. What a 💩bag! You should see a layer and have a battle plan to document her inability parent and jettison her out of the house. If ever a chance call the police on her.
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/24 12:34 AM
2

You are making her pay child support I hope!? Just stick it to her if she isn’t on time or doesn’t pay. You are entering your prime! Focus on the kids and your career. She is going down hill every day. This dude will dump her soon, can’t trust a cheater. Watch strong successful male on you tube. Time to be a leader and take bullshit.
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/24 06:16 PM
6

Dude. She will be going through the pump and dump and all the same shit from guys. Don’t look for a partner. Focus on your career and grind. Take the dating apps as a distraction and not serious. You also get what you put in to the apps. You really need to have quite a few going at the same time. And if you’re doing all few apps? Might want to change that as well. Watch strong successful male.
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/24 05:48 PM
4

Dude. The more important thing to consider is If she kills everyone?
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/24 11:37 PM
8

Are you in at fault state? If no then it doesn’t really matter. She never will confess. But the evidence is in her phone man. Deleted photos, whatever, it’s hard for cheaters to keep a 100% clean phone.
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/24 09:20 PM
23

While you keep financing her life. That’s the ploy. Ask for $$$k for penalty for failure to negotiate in a timely fashion.
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/24 05:16 PM
1

Don’t take her back when she asks in 3 months. Lol. She just wants resources extended.
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/24 12:21 AM
1

Spend $500 - my guess is you will get enough guidance to cover that and more down the road.
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/24 10:42 PM
1

It doesn’t hurt to consult a good lawyer and pay some money to get solid guidance for the year of separation. They might have some tips what to do before divorce starts as well.
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/24 09:55 PM
6

Just don’t give her anything for free.
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/24 09:25 PM
1

Shit. A year of covering her expense? Hopefully she works.
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/24 09:24 PM
6

Just don’t get married again man unless you have been with her for 5 years. They can hide their bull shit for a long time. They can hide a lot of stuff but Usually it comes out in big crisis, they either step up or bail. Watch for red flags. Personally I think it’s too soon to be in an exclusive relationship. M
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/24 03:08 PM
5

193 a month is not much. Do you have the kids actually 50%?
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/24 02:21 PM
1

How much we talking about
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/24 10:28 PM
2

Sue her in civil court! Or do small claims Court.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/24 01:44 AM
8

You have to plan this shit out of your exit. You want to surprise her. You want to have a living arrangement plan ready to go. You want to be ready for bull shit. False accusations, police, cps, abuse claims, money grabbing, turn the kids against you. You must always be on the offensive. Don’t take the high road. She will do whatever no matter what path you take. You want to have assets at the ready for housing, expenses, etc.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/24 09:26 PM
1

Weigh the pros and cons. The guns put you in a precarious area being accused of abuse w/guns. I would retain the attorney and go over all this and see what is advised.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/24 12:09 AM
1

File with the courts. She mislead the courts. She committed a crime.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/24 12:06 AM
1

Lawyer up man.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/24 12:04 AM
8

Is it Florida. Sounds like a game plan to counter life time alimony. Go to court get a lawyer. Might save you money.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/24 12:02 AM
3

Move the guns to family asap. She may be trying to value them as well
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 07:25 PM
3

When a dealer offered me $11k trade in for my car and I believe the engine seized. They didn’t check it first as they planned. I signed as fast as I could. Judges have to get through the day. All parties agree. Okay. Done deal. You should be working behind the scenes now with a lawyer to see if you can put some or all into a trust or some kind of financial shield.
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 04:33 PM
3

Bull shit. It sounds like she wanted to ride the sausage roller coaster. Lifestyle, live my best life, reach my potential= party with more sausage. They always come back. Always. She has a plan. I have had all my gf from high school and d college reach out to me and want to be friends after 30 years. My ex waffled after we told the kids. I was done with her shit though, like you I was tired of trying/ She might have been pumped and dumped so much she can’t even stay in a relationship. So she see…
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 04:30 PM
13

Your crazy. It’s not the child. Women in marriage, when challenges present the marriage, they turn on you. She has shown you that’s what she will do. Many many women do this. Husband gets ill, leave him, husband loses job, leave him, husband is grieving parents loss, leave him etc etc etc. If you’re stupid enough to do this Legal document signed no rights to your assets even if reaches common law years, no marriage, not on any of your finances, or your property. 100% separate.
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 04:26 PM
5

court manners! Say your honor if they are a judge. Say good morning. Do not interrupt anyone. Ask your honor if you can speak.You might want to prepare a statement. Practice poker face. If the lawyer says outlandish stories about you. “Your honor that never happened. This is a fabricated story either by my soon to be ex or her lawyer. There is No evidence to this ridiculous fraudulent claim. I have been gainfully employed for 20 years. In great standing with my job of 10 years with many connecti…
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 02:36 PM
1

You should record her looking like this. I would put cameras up as well. You might want to get statements lined up of all the people that have known you for years at work etc. you can say bull shit as well. “I spoke to my lawyer about your call to the lawyer and making a. Fraudulent accusation against me for custody. It’s been documented by date and time to match your phone records. Your lawyer can’t lie at court just a heads up.”
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 01:24 PM
4

Don’t give anything for free. Just follow state guidelines. If she wants something ask for something in return. Once she puts her cards on the table then make a deal to opt out of a of a monthly payment.
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 01:20 PM
4

Don’t wait. You’re describing a person that will will have you arrested for a false accusation. Lawyer- let them guide you. Women lawyers (good ones) know the shit unstable ones try to pull better. Has she been diagnosed with anything? Meds? Have a plan of where to relocate as needed. Family, friend, airbnb. Nanny cams in the house. You should record the crazy shit. Be ready for anything. The common tactic is police, she’s scared and files a restraining order etc. Move anything you value slowly …
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 01:10 PM
1

Don’t hope. Attack and make it happen
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 12:50 AM
2

You might have to hire a financial investigator. Might be worth it to avoid gong her money. Oh and she is lying.
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 12:04 AM
1

Walking and away and not talking to her is the most powerful move you can make. I have said many times if you get divorced and she changes than you can get back together but not be married. But that’s a freaking like losing your sunglasses. Very slim getting them back.
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/24 10:57 PM
3

Also, can she ask for more support if your income goes up.
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/24 07:11 PM
4

Time to be a bad aZz. You should be mad. You should be trying to prove that they are bad news with drugs. Call cps. Call the police. Do something. I would tell that guy come over and get some anytime! You have to start leading your life and what’s going to happen instead on the defensive. Actions.
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/24 01:40 PM
7

For f’s sake. Don’t take cheaters back man. Don’t freaking date either one of them. Focus on being a dad and grinding on your carreer or plan for career.
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/24 01:04 AM
3

Ideally you want a 1 bedroom with a space that doesn’t qualify as a bedroom. Or you could sleep in living room when she is over. Maybe a pull out couch.
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/24 12:12 AM
6

Document daily like a journal. 1-15-23. 5pm. Ex speaking to attorney to attempt fraudulent accusation regarding alcohol to prevent me from seeing my children. Her lawyer says “”
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/24 12:10 AM
3

Will she be blindsided by this? If so she will try to wreck havoc on you- possibly false accusations /police/ etc. Don’t start seeing someone until you’re out of the house. Just don’t do it. Can you afford 2 places? Is she a sahm?
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 09:51 PM
11

Yes! It usually is a default clause. But I wouldn’t be surprised if they don’t get married on purpose, that’s what shitbags do. So you should add a cohabitation clause .
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 07:59 PM
1

Just meet for drinks first time. Casual only. Or you can do a hookup of tinder. But dispose your protection lol.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 05:19 PM
2

Who are you? This is for men.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 05:14 PM
2

Dude. If she makes less money than you or doesn’t work, this makes no freaking sense. You’re paying for her to date. Consult an attorney.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 05:13 PM
4

Nope. See yeah. Write the plan and work the Plan.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 05:12 PM
7

You plan for divorce and don’t tell her. Line it all up. Going through this Crap and setting a bad example for your kids on what marriage is not the way to go.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 05:10 PM
9

No I’m the leader. I’m slowly replacing this shit so you leave. Get with the program or stay at your moms. You never empty the trash in there with your nasty pads and the trash can is so small it doesn’t hold much.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 05:06 PM
2

Common man. But lots of supplements out there you can take that will help with that. Neugenix line is at Walgreens. Largine worked for me. But they can also make you last longer. So if you’re not attracted that much to her then you still have a problem.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 01:28 PM
7

Use the dating apps. Just treat it as a diversion. Expect Shenanigans and laugh. Don’t be afraid to walk out on a date Brice they lied or say something explosive diarrhea. The other thing you should work on is your investments. Put some time in on that.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 01:25 PM
3

For me I said fuck it I’m done from it. She didn’t like the counselor (male) he didn’t let her off the hook. So therefore she wanted someone else.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 01:23 PM
3

I would bring it up to your attorney.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/24 11:28 PM
4

First off your going to be fine. Focus on you your career. You’re only 20! Your prime is yet to come. Grind it out and get your income level up. In 10 years you could have bachelors degree and making a solid income. Or carve a path out in the military. Try to get some specialized training that could transition to civilian life. Watch strong successful male in you tube. Then Don’t ever make this mistake ever again man. Get a dna test for the child.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/24 09:39 PM
5

You should keep a journal of each day what happens. When she is not there. Record conversations or video. She is a shit show. Maybe you can call the cops and get her a dui?
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/24 08:20 PM
4

Jesus man. Be relentless on finding an attorney. You have enough money go farther out from where you live.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/24 05:07 PM
7

There is always a way. You have to have your balls. First thing I thought was not come home Friday. Business trip. F her. No matter what you do she is going to shit on you. So you can let her (you sound defeated and like a simp) or you can fight back and be great dad. Kick ass at work. I would tell her parents great daughter you have. Still married and screwing around. Is that what you taught her. She has no respect or love for you. She is the enemy at this point man. Consult an attorney. Work o…
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/24 02:59 PM
2

I would Call the douchebag in front of her and say you know she has went on 6 dates this month. Laugh and hang up. I prefer to put daylight on it all. Because she shouldn’t be skating on being a shitty human, parent, ex wife. She is still going to all the shitty things in divorce. A lot of guys think high road and maybe she won’t, but they still do and your vilified socially with lies. If the low road is warranted, take it. The big win on this is she will be occupied trying to defend herself if …
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/24 02:47 PM
20

They tell themselves the story so often it becomes the truth to them. They brainwash themselves because they wouldn’t be able to sleep at night and they to sell this bullshit to the next dumbass that meets her.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/24 03:23 AM
1

You’re not even in your prime yet. Plenty of time to turn it around and kick aZz. Women have to be the last item on the list. Grind on your career or classes. Maybe pick up a side hustle online or not to generate extra cash. Hopefully a tech guy can give advice in this forum. But my suggestion is look at taking classes online after work. But you need to narrow your focus what you want to do. I would look into exploding fields of tech first. Where will the jobs be in demand and not enough tech em…
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 11:37 PM
3

Because the car and wedding gifts I would ask for something in return. Dude I 100% expect “are you guys out of your god damn minds” proposal! You should consult a lawyer and have one ready to slap down a retainer. How is the living situation? Is she out? Or you out? Is there a house owned or lease involved. I expect she wants a lot of stuff and cash. Probably will ask you to cover her expenses as well. Like insurance’s. If they act stupid just walk out. Very powerful move.
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 10:20 PM
7

Keep moving man. Work out. Keep accomplishing tasks. Know your assets and debts 100% and keep limits on cards. Lock it down. Just when you think it’s amicable they start the shenanigans. Be prepared. Don’t say she won’t do that.
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 09:48 PM
5

Time to man up bro. Soon as your out everything will be better. You must work out! This helps your head. Eat right. See a lawyer. Write the plan work the plan. Don’t tell her tell your ready. Have a plan where you’re going to live. See a counselor if need be. Do something’s but nothing. Keep setting tasks and goals and accomplish. Build on it daily. Don’t drink booze or get high. Keep work tight, get it done.
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 09:47 PM
3

You will pay a lot more. File joint for the last time. Don’t threaten. Just go to a lawyer and get it rolling. They will give a checklist. You need to think about where you’re going to live. Before you tell her, talk to your family, tell them what’s going on. The call her family. Then tell her. Stops a shit narrative on her part. If she is going to be shitty you better get finances and assets tight. Know where everything is and how which.
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 09:42 PM
7

What the fuck are you giving her? 2 years. See you later we split it 50/50. Don’t be a doormat! Time to change man.
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 09:12 PM
2

If it’s in her name. That’s good. F her. Or say I’ll pay the bill but get off my cell plan.
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 03:24 PM
2

What state are you in?
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 03:22 PM
2

I know I experimented with L arginine and soy lectin…? Seemed like it desensitized me. But also I wa snack in action quicker for round 2. Google or Reddit search it. There is some stuff otc as well in Walgreens. Negenix?
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 02:32 PM
4

You can take supplements that help blood flow/stamina and I have experienced lasting longer and getting to round 2 easier. I took Largine and something else. You could start with a condom also.
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 02:02 AM
6

No!
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 12:56 AM
6

Once you’re out you won’t feel defeated.
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 12:53 AM
6

Tell everyone to fuck off that doesn’t believe you. Even family members. You’re not in my side? then good bye. As a man be the leader and you will not tolerate this bull shit.
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/24 06:11 PM
3

Yep this is what you want. She will alter down the road try to get you to have the kids more so she doesn’t pay for as much food etc. my ex demands the kids shower over at my place on the Tuesday night I have them for 2 hours, to save water bill. Wed night I have them for about 4 hours and she always wants to schedule dr appts then. I told her to fuck off that stops. You have to ask me.
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/24 06:04 PM
2

She is mad for you saying fuck off you are getting minimal support/get a fucking job. Stay the course and no free assets. She wants X then she gives up Y. If you have to do alimony steer into 1 payment a month or do a lump sum buyout. Less contact the better. You will have to do medical insurance for the kids, but anything not covered is 50/50.if she wants you out of pocket medical then you get Y. Have a cohabitation clause for sure. When it comes to the house make sure you 100% sure if you’re k…
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/24 06:00 PM
3

Dude she is already cheating and planning a big takedown on you soon as she is ready. See a lawyer asap and start the plan, work the plan. You’re being naive. She doesn’t love or respect you. I don’t see why you can’t see that. You’re a resource daddy now while she plays. Take a stand. Dictate how’s it’s going to go. There is no saving this.
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/24 03:46 PM
2

Well first off prepare for her to want more than child support. What most stbx want is max child support and primary custody and then after they want you take your child sometimes even more than 50% so they can pass the expense on to you. Then CS can be spent on her. What the medical insurance plan? You might have to own this part but split any non covered med bills 50%. That means whatever is left after insurance and scripts etc. This can be a big expense. I don’t know the state laws but you sh…
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/24 03:41 PM
4

Man. Best to be done. When they say that stuff they have been planning for a while, even setting up the next guy. She may have already started seeing someone. Most women have to have landing place to go before they give up the resources that your providing.
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/24 02:49 PM
2

I would keep the number for now as long as you have blocked the necessary folks. Just see how it goes before you change phone numbers.
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/24 02:25 PM
1

Are you still living at the same house? If yes I would not. Unless she went on vacation with the kids while you were still working.
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/24 05:30 PM
9

She will want everything. Don’t reveal what you really target as assets you want to keep Negotiate everything. Don’t be nice and give her assets. If you open up that door she will keep asking and hold you hostage to get more. Set the tone that you’re not going to be fucked with. Remember - no matter what you do, she will still do her bullshit. And her goal will be to get you in trouble so she gets primary and the house and money. You need cameras and be able to record conversations.
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/24 02:05 AM
2

You should always consult an attorney first. What can you afford? Bunk with family/ friend/ coworker Camper/Rv Airbnb Rent a room Corp apt
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/24 06:11 PM
15

Lawyer and. Socially out them as well. Control the narrative.
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/24 06:05 PM
4

Record conversations or video them.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/24 09:45 PM
9

Reality is this guy will eventually shed her. It may happen before the said vacation lol. Divorced and kids she has only weekends spells out to me she probably is immature and a cheater? She is probably feeding the kids all the positive stuff she can which may be fluffed. Teach your kids how to see through bull shitter and pretenders.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/24 12:55 AM
3

I know everyone says just fight it legally and take the high road. I do not. If there is leverage to be had use it, or maybe make some moves that can’t be traced to you. Meaning subtle moves that will distract her and keep her screwing up to solidify your case. Where ever her trouble is, booze, pills, can’t hold jobs, record, std, whatever. I would sue her civilly for the fees. Start with the false tro. Shitty ex’s will continue to do bad shit no matter what actions you take.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/24 02:58 PM
9

Now is the time to go full throttle on divorce. Find my self just men’s have sec with other people and have you ot for it ‘man. Look, everything thing she is telling you is small truths and lies. The lies is to stall you from putting her out on her own. You’re the resource daddy. Close the bank.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/24 01:44 PM
3

Florida is a decent state when it comes to. Divorce for men and alimony. See a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/24 01:33 PM
4

You pay support and try to do every other weekend (I don’t know your work schedule). Maybe a Wed night dinner? She wants support so she has to pay for everything. You need a holiday/bdays schedule parenting plan. Initially ask for 50/50 split in current assets. Do not give her anything for free. Save stuff to negotiate. Example she will ask for alimony if you make more. You can say you Keep your assets and no alimony. She is keeping the furniture so therefore you can say you have a claim of the …
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/24 09:08 PM
3

Lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/24 06:03 PM
19

She is Seeking attention and validation. Because she is way past her prime.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/24 11:06 AM
5

Advice is don’t agree to shit. Get the kids plan figured out. Maybe hire a mediator
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/24 11:27 PM
9

Protect your self man. No favors. She is now an adversary!
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/24 07:54 PM
3

You’re in your prime! Your ex will realize she is not. Just take it slow but focus on your grind /career and friends. Avoid relationships for a couple of years. Men have the keys to the relationship. So don’t give out keys!
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/24 06:52 PM
12

Take the lead. Say this fucking stops now. Or she can be a single mom. If you’re not going to be my wife then let’s move on. Before you do that call your family and hers and inform them of the issue. Then lay it down on her. This helps prevent her lying and coming up with false accusations.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/24 12:11 AM
10

Push your lawyer to call it blatant fabrications and ask the judge to make disciplinary actions for lying to the court. You gave tax returns. Use them. Counter with asking for child support and alimony. If you have the money hire an accountant to spell it all out for the judge. Spend money to save money over a lifetime! Don’t penny punch.
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/24 08:08 PM
7

Depends on the state. But hell yeah consult an attorney. I would look to stay in the house but protect myself with cameras and recorders. You might want a go pro to keep with you. Move any firearms out of the house if you have some- have family store. Start clamping down on all spending. If you have to kill streaming services, etc. cap the credit cards limits. Change your passwords. Move direct deposit to another account. Put alerts on shared accounts. Does she work?
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/24 08:05 PM
2

If you want to protect your kids you know what to do.
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/24 11:15 PM
4

Hey man. First off never never ever just give away free assets to the ex (the house equity). This is a sign of nice guy/weakness and she will exploit it. Use it instead to negotiate. And don’t tell her what you value the most and want. Start at 50/50 everything! AlMost all stbx wives start thinking about that they have to live on their own and pay for it. So then they get selfish and start grabbing assets and demanding more (maybe not yours? Idk) Please be prepared for it! You have seen her at h…
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/24 04:22 PM
10

Be a bad aZz and go full throttle for full custody. It’s not worth the gamble your kids life and health. She will let him come over guaranteed if she hasn’t already man.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 09:48 PM
4

That’s just how women throw you off. It’s all bs.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 06:52 PM
12

Because you appear weak to her. 4?years and offer her everything. wtf? She sees a simp doormat. Time to let her know to F off. Just say the deal I offered is off the table.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 06:49 PM
3

Your young. Your Prime is coming! Divorce asap and focus on career/education and grind it out.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 02:13 PM
7

DNA test would be the first thing I would do man. Cheaters just keep cheating and cheating.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 02:09 PM
3

Hire a private investigator.
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/23 07:37 PM
7

She is stringing you along. It’s over. She doesn’t love you as a husband and doesn’t respect you anymore. She is acting and stalling. You think it’s only emotional haha! More than likely it’s hella of a lot more than that. It always is. Women only admit to the bare minimum based on what you know. They will even lie when you shout them the evidence. If that doesn’t work they start balling. File for divorce. Go forward. You need to let your actions speak for you. Tell her let’s get divorced and if…
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/23 07:36 PM
2

High road doesn’t do shit. Ass hats like your ex will keep doing stuff no matter if you’re playing nice or you play hardball.
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/23 11:17 PM
9

Who gives a shit. You shouldn’t. You’re separated. She is banging dudes from work. Move on. Don’t waste time just accelerate to divorce. Start nailing your finances and assets down man. You know a tiny bit of what she is up to, when women separate the other guy is up and running with her.
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/23 11:15 PM
3

It’s over man. You can’t lay down and get shit on, because that will be her plan. She doesn’t respect you note love you. As long as you keep saying I don’t want a divorce, she sees you as weak. To protect your kids and yourself you should divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/23 02:38 AM
11

Dude. Look the shit is if she has no problem lying to you and give you a std, wtf….. doesn’t that answer your question.
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/23 08:41 PM
2

That much on the line yes lawyer! . Make sure you put daylight on the divorce after the lawyer with your family and hers. This helps prevent a bull shit narrative if your out in front. Don’t Give any free assets to her. This is business as this point. Negotiate everything. Don’t tell her you’re keen on keeping the house yet.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/23 05:47 PM
1

Do what you want to do. Work the plan. Sell the house and get the townhouse. See That was easy. You have to commit and work it. Or just table it while you start the new job.’ Or…. Start a fraternity and get bunch of guys to live with you and then- you will be the god father. ……lol.
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/23 02:06 AM
3

It takes time like 5 plus years to vet a woman. Slow the fuck down. You can get into a relationship but just no to moving in together, no babies and no marriage. You hold the keys to a relationship. You weren’t ready. And you have no idea how those women really are. Also you need to be cool with being alone. You’re done with the bullshit marriage. What are your hobbies and interests? What about sports league or a hobby night? Do something. Dive bar Fridays?
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/23 01:54 AM
1

Let her get pumped and dumped over and over again. She will be a cat lady in no time. Set boundaries. “I would rather you not say shit to unless you’re on fire 🔥. I would think about it but yeah that’s when it’s okay.”
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/23 01:51 AM
1

See a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/23 01:49 AM
5

You suit up the armor. Put the sword on. Protect your kid. Don’t take the fucking simp high road. Don’t communicate unless you have to about your son. Anything no urgent don’t answer for a day or two. Don’t do anything above the agreement. Women want drama ans attention. Give her neither. Hit the gym and this will help your head. Kick aZz at work, your health and being a dad.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/23 06:58 PM
3

Nice guy doesn’t work ever. I was gone 60 hours a week. Did the normal man chores. But also did the grocery shopping. Come home to a sink full of dishes and start cleaning. She couldn’t vacuum- shoulder issue. Would help with everything else. I’m not sure she did anything without my help except spend money.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/23 04:47 PM
7

She trying the bully/bull dozer tactic. Stand your ground. As I have said to many. You can take the high road or the low road- but your ex will still do all the underhanded tactics no matter what you do. So don’t think being nice will do shit. She will see it as a sign of weakness. Judges likes 2 things- outstanding court manners and hard evidence. One thing (which I don’t know) is I wonder if you presented the following - outstanding work ethic with coworkers/boss statements. Loyalty aspect as …
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/23 02:39 PM
2

No refinance, no name off deed
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/23 01:10 AM
1

You’re an idiot for considering an open marriage. Yeah she was seeing him and having sex. Guess what? Now you need to get tested for stds. Merry Xmas Just plan your exit and go. If you bought the house before marriage you’re good. Thank god it’s only been 3 years. Just warn her. Just drop it on her and leave. Watch strong successful male. Open marriage bullshit is just a ploy to cover cheating that they did prior.
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/23 12:58 AM
2

Yep. Don’t engage crazy.
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/23 12:47 AM
1

I think volleyball or Wallyball would be good for you. Should be indoor leagues if you live in a somewhat populated area.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 11:54 PM
2

I would not present it. You can be cool or an asshole she will try to grab and demand as much as she can. So be ready 100% with the plan done and executed and have the divorce papers ready. Your brief description of her and the divorce shit is all I needed to hear that she is going to be a problem. So. 1- do the prep. Start pouring over finances and assets. Change passwords, put alerts on accounts and reduce debts/ credit card limits. 2- valuable hobby and precious possessions move out slowly to…
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 04:54 PM
3

Move on. Whatever she tells you will be a redacted down 20% version. Most cheaters just keep cheating their whole life. Don’t open the door, just know she was a shitty wife, a Shitty ex wife and a shitty human.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 03:28 PM
8

She can fuck right off. Tell her to get her knee pads back out and I’m sure some dumb ass will help her.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 12:20 AM
3

NO! Cheaters keep cheating. You think this is the first time lol. And what kind of role model for marriage are you going to be. Simp doormat dad and cheating lying wife?
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/23 12:18 AM
11

You can’t hesitate with abusive spouses! You have to go fast and hard legally at them. Don’t hold back. Use all the information you know about her to leverage success. She will fuck you over and sleep like a baby. Time for battle.
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/23 11:45 PM
14

The truth. But you can slim down the details. You’re going to get through this! But you need to work hard on your self and work. Make daily and weekly goals. Even little ones. Even small tasks. Health, finances, etc. Achieving and hitting the gym will help your mental state and sleep.
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/23 11:43 PM
1

Get a lawyer to fill out the documents and prepare you. Then you turn it in and go to court. Or look for pro bona help.
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/23 02:12 AM
4

Mine did the same exact thing. But she changed her mind on divorce (she initiated divorce) and I went full throttle into divorce. I said no as well.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/23 11:31 PM
3

Side hustle after work or non work hours.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/23 09:17 PM
1

I put on the act for the kids. But if it was her friends and I didn’t particularly like them or knew I was going to get saddled with keeping kids out of trouble the whole time (I don’t know the ages of yours) while she did nothing, I said not feeling well not going.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 06:34 PM
3

My advice is to fake it when around others. When with her, treat her like a shitty roommate. Meaning don’t initiate conversation with her. In fact for the most part ignore her. When the kids don’t need you at night, hit the gym. Don’t be around her. Eat healthy. Two. See a lawyer. Know the process and specifics for your state. You need to start writing your plan today! Dragging out divorce means you pay for more of everything (if your the primary) for longer. Are you separating and living togeth…
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 06:30 PM
1

Try this. Say “fuck it” in the session. That you really don’t care anymore. Tired of her bull shit. Who is going to get primary custody?
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/23 02:32 AM
5

Nope. Plan your exit
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/23 02:29 AM
2

🤘
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/23 02:27 AM
2

Stash some cash for emergencies. Move 50% of the money into a new account and change your direct deposit. Change passwords. Make sure you only have keys to your car.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/23 01:04 AM
2

Sell it a jewelry store, not pawn store.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/23 01:03 AM
2

Fuck No. Don’t meet up. She wants something. So it’s a no. Tell her just send an email and that she looks fat. Lol. Seriously. She is going to lie to you anyway. Meet up could set you back emotionally. Why do it. There is no positive out of it.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/23 12:45 AM
2

Dude get a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/23 12:30 AM
16

Dude. Yes there is always a motive. Yep either backup plan because she has or is getting pumped and dumped. Or she is in a bind and setting you up for an ask- $$$, etc. Going forward stop answering the phone and stop responding to texts right away. Wait till the next day. And say was busy, had plans last night, forgot. Whatever. Start being a Chad. You need to work on yourself man. Hit the gym and eat right. Kick aZz at work.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/23 12:29 AM
1

I would use it as leverage as needed.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/23 12:20 AM
2

What does your lawyer say? Don’t offer anything yet. Once you make a compromise early she will move the goal posts. My advice is start being an asshole to her when necessary and say no. I would use the evidence of her affair with boss now to put her on the defensive. Stbx keep pushing for more, no matter if you place nice or not.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/23 12:17 AM
2

Paying. Lol. Sorry. She can take her deal and shove it.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/23 12:11 AM
1

Get a lawyer. Get protected! Yea she is trying to screw you. Use a credit card for the retainer. Refi your car to get $2000 for retainer. Call a relative do so fucking thing.
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 11:11 PM
3

It’s a he said she said. Talk to your lawyer. It’s a no fault state. Seems baseless to me. Start making your own moves to counter. Don’t pay for shit. Hopefully you have cut her out of phone plan and aren’t paying for streaming services for her etc. You live separately right?
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 11:02 PM
1

Is she cohabiting with this guy?
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 10:55 PM
0

You are an idiot. You are going to show your son what a crappy father does and put you and him in danger for health. Then he will think oh I should marry a liar and a cheater and I did good. Do you think she cares if she cheats and gives something to you or brings Covid home to your son? And you will say oh, maybe just one more chance. Wtf? Get your priorities right. Protect your son and your self from a turd circling the toilet. She will drag you down with her. If you have decent assets get a f…
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 05:39 PM
1

If you can get a good deal yes. But do your Due diligence and solid inspections. Is it in a nice area that the price will go up?
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 12:35 AM
2

Open marriage means it over man. Watch strong successful male. It is an epidemic of open. Start figuring out how stash some cash. Write a plan and work the plan.
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 12:26 AM
1

If your playing child support tell her fat ass she is supposed cover it. When she needs a favor Just say no to her. Or don’t open the message. Or don’t answer the phone. And then say had to work or some shit.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/23 05:51 PM
1

The “distant” time means she has her eyes on another guy or was straight out with him. Then something happened. Usually guys like that drop the cheating wife because they don’t want to be the boyfriend. So when she gets dumped she figures out the grass is kinda brown. Did you ever check her phone during the distant time.
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/23 03:07 AM
4

When it gets to this point, I think you have to think out the box and stop playing defensive. What can you do to get her to leave you alone. Either direct action or can’t be tracked back to you. Like in better call Saul he would make a couple of moves that would end up getting the result he wanted. I always think what is her weak spots, addictions etc. what does she protect the most. Is it her image. Just keep throwing ideas out until you get a winner. The point is to keep her busy with bull shi…
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/23 06:09 PM
13

There is always always always an alternative motive when she reaches out to you. They think 3 moves out. I do this, then this, then this and I yank the football away (Charlie Brown) or ask for something. It’s all planned.
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/23 02:56 PM
1

You laugh and hope she marries some other dumb ass so you can stop paying alimony. She is going to get pumped, dumped, and ghosted. And you laugh some more. Tell her she looks fat regardless. Make her get her own phone plan asap. Cut out whatever you can. Kill all the streaming services. Hell put a lock on your door and put the tv In there. Basically don’t make it easy for her. Brainstorm. Start smoking cigars in the house. Leave a fish under her bed lol. Make sure you are the only one with your…
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/23 01:13 AM
29

I would absolutely bet that your ex wife made some really made up bad shit up about you. She probably has rehearsed stories that she told them. Women will lie there ass off for money $$$$! It’s either that or ex has made promises about backing her.
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/23 10:57 PM
1

Dude lawyer. Rule of thumb is purchased before marriage it’s yours.
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/23 06:14 PM
7

Out of love means there’s another guy. So stop fucking feeling bad and get mad. “No she told me she is not doing that.” Bullshit man. This is textbook what they do. Don’t believe me check her phone. Hopefully you have finances separated. Push hard for a speedy divorce. Don’t interact. Tell her no fucking Xmas presents, no new years, no Valentine’s Day shit. Hit the gym at night! Kick aZz there and work. Take some trips with buddies. Get out of the house.
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/23 02:54 PM
1

If you date a woman for 5 years with no issues, then move in together for a year. Then maybe get married but do a prenup.
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/23 02:43 PM
1

You will pay more alimony. You will share the assets and debt you amassed over the next 6 years. You will waste 6 more years. You will giver her time to start doing underhanded things regarding money. My advice is to say you’re divorcing in 6 years but see a lawyer and say you changed your mind when you are 100% ready to go. Get the assets protected legally and reduce debt. Have a plan a to z. Then execute the plan.
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/23 09:49 PM
7

Take the lead. Tell her to drop that bull shit. If she doesn’t walk away and go do something by your self. Don’t put her on a pedestal. Be a man and check her shit immediately when she is out of line. The more you do this the more she will respect you. Not saying the below is your case, but be vigilant. Sometimes women say shit like that because they are projecting their own bad behavior onto you. Same goes for cheating. It is probably time to keep your eyes and ears open to her actions for red …
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/23 05:21 PM
3

Try to convince her she to live with the affair partner. I would call both your family and hers and say we are getting divorce because she is a cheater. Don’t sit back on the defensive. Stay on the offensive. If you can’t stay in house force the sale, or use as leverage to net a better assets deal for yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men28/11/23 01:05 AM
1

Every situation is different. Kids? How many years married? Your age? If no kids the sooner you pull the trigger the better for the most part. Lacking intimacy- always ask “then where is she getting it.” So either divorce or you reset things and check her bullshit. We start living within our means, you start giving me More in the bedroom or the other choice is get the fuck out.
/r/Divorce_Men27/11/23 02:13 AM
17

Dude. Women can show you they are the bomb for a while. Then surprise, she has a body count of 200, her girl friends are ho’s who do girls nights, her family is crazy, she has mental health issues she didn’t tell you about, she has $100k in debt, she thought she could still have fwb while seeing you because there was no exclusive talk, I can go on. Don’t rush. Don’t move in together, don’t get engaged. It Takes years to get to know her. Keep an eye out for red flags. Don’t put her on a pedestal …
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 11:26 PM
1

I’m also a masshole! She wasn’t to make changes to the agreement that only benefit her after 5 years. I am going to ask for adjustment in my favor because the state stopped allowing to deduct alimony/child support and it’s in the agreement. I’m already living off of less than 30k net a year and providing a place my kids can stay with me. While paying all medical and dental bills. I’m done and finding an attorney. Any recommendations in middlesex?
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 11:20 PM
7

Yep. Consult a lawyer not the mediator. Then buy $20,000 in gold lol. Or something else.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 10:57 PM
9

That’s because she is. Don’t let her in. Porch pickup bitch.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 10:55 PM
5

Record and document everything. Print out her texts and emails.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 10:52 PM
2

Fuck that. She need to pay back the money. Call your family and hers and update them . Watch her squeal and cry. Fuck her.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 05:13 PM
1

She wants you to carry it because the Chad doesn’t do kids probably. It’s all about what she can get out of it I think. But that’s me.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 05:11 PM
1

Don’t take he shit talk as real. These are the bullshit This is the bullshit she came up with to help her sleep at night. Be thankful a cheater and liar is gone!
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/23 05:54 PM
3

Why do you want a liar and a cheater in your life. Yea she can split time with the kids. But time for you to walk tall and away from her man. Don’t be a simp. Have respect for yourself!
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/23 05:52 PM
1

I didn’t read lawyer any where? Get them involved.
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/23 01:27 AM
7

You have to fucking grab your balls and move forward. Be the great dad. Kick aZz at work. Kick aZz on being physically fit and mentally fit. Tell the families that your stbex is a shitty person that she won’t talk her daughter. Look man she is not going to change. So put on the armor and grab a sword and go to battle to defend your family from her.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 09:35 PM
4

Don’t simp. Don’t chase. Don’t beg. She is willing to give up a holiday to bang dudes. Don’t go back to a ho3 garden tool. Be the leader for your kids.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 06:30 PM
11

It’s all bs. Don’t believe anything your told. More than likely she had him in the wings before separation. Move fast with divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 02:30 PM
1

If they don’t have legal documents of a loans. I would say fuck that. I’m not paying any of it.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 03:38 AM
1

Just explore the apps. The fun is the distraction of texting and seeing where these shit show goes. Can pass the time easier. Lol. You have the grifters, the bangers, the I want dinner out of this, the Looking for resources daddies. Use different approaches on different apps: tinder just for fun. I think when you do your profile less is more. Don’t say shit about divorce and the timeline. Don’t get married again! It takes years to vet a woman.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 03:09 AM
2

It’s a shit show and will keep being a shit show. So what you do is figuratively walk away. Only discuss logistics. The greatest move a man can make is walk away. Stop simping and asking. It didn’t work. Work on your self physically and mentally. Kick aZz with work. Do hobbies or sports where you connect with people. Make the moves to move on. Now you may want to move on after that but what happens is she will at least respect you and your actions for your self. She will probably bring up a get …
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 02:57 AM
2

Wtf? Why did you pay the hospital so quickly. Stop today! Use a fucking credit card for the retainer.
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/23 12:24 AM
2

You can’t withdraw from your 401k without a tax penalty. Is it in writing that she has to pay you for the equity? You can say okay but you want 10% more to cover the taxes. Otherwise no deal, give me my cash.
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/23 12:22 AM
4

Yeah. Fat chance she gets a job. If she does then you can file with the court for the alimony to go down. Watch and wait. When she does then jump on it. My kids have to share a room. And they are 15 17. It is what it is. My ex has temp Job, that’s the best she has done over 4 years. She has a masters in education. The problem is a large part of the population immediately hates her. So she doesn’t get hired. You do the best you can with you got. I focus on my strength. I let them chill with me, I…
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/23 08:19 PM
54

You are an idiot. You definitely use everything to your advantage. If she is a narc she is gonna to fuck you over hard. Get your head out on a swivel. Get a lawyer. You’re going to end up funding her lifestyle and legal trouble. You need to live yourself and protect the kids. You’re doing neither. You are going down the wrong path.
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/23 08:15 PM
4

Don’t keep silent. Tell your family and hers that she is a cheater. Unless you are going to use it as leverage for divorce if you have the evidence). Don’t let her get off with it impacting her social standing. If you let her control the narrative you will be labeled an abusive spouse and she can deny cheating.
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/23 08:12 PM
12

When the respect is gone that means there is another guy.
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/23 01:13 AM
5

Don’t say shit. Lie if you have to. She will use it against you in some sort of fashion.
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/23 11:06 PM
5

Move fast and legally. Don’t waste time asking us. Get a lawyer and finance attorney.
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/23 11:04 PM
8

No mercy time.
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/23 11:02 PM
2

Tinder and condoms
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/23 09:48 PM
2

Dude. I think your leaving a lot out. What happened after you got married until now that broke the back? But… once a cheater always a cheater. Yeah, she was banging other dudes while dating you, absolutely. But you married her anyway.
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/23 05:54 PM
2

You need to talk to a lawyer and a divorce finance/accountant. They can guide you on legal Moves to protect your business properly. Don’t dick around on this. Act quickly. Your layer may be able to recommend someone. She is going to lie about everything so be prepared. I would get ahead of her and call both parents yourself and explain the situation. So a false narrative cannot be made.
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/23 10:40 PM
1

First. Don’t say shit. Get the lawyer and have a plan with them. - take any spare keys for your car and have them where you only know. - I would open a new bank account and then take action on what lawyer says- move 50%. -I would make sure I had a bout $1000 in cash handy for emergencies only where you know. -I would reduce spending limits on cards if you can or close an account you share. -change all your passwords. -anything valuable or family heirloom get it out of the house slowly into stora…
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/23 10:36 PM
0

There’s always a motive. rape accusation, abuse accusation, give you something you don’t want std. prep you for asking for something, draw things out- the longer you stay the longer you pay, could be a stall tactic. Tell her to bring a girl friend and then okay. Lol.
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/23 06:54 PM
3

That is how they roll. Same here. I worked 60 hours a week. Did the grocery shopping. Did the dishes vacuumed yard….. kids appts. She would be on resting cun! Facebook. And that’s another reason she is a ex.
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/23 06:47 PM
1

I did a massive to do and goal list. By day by week by month. Accomplishing g a lot kept me motivated and distracted. Finances, health, hobbies, bills, etc.
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/23 06:18 PM
2

Women are spenders. So not surprising. The only thing that caught my attention was the boob job. Man that’s a sure sign that she wants attention from other men. You need to be looking for red flags instead of stumbling upon them. Idk if I would divorce/. If you said you had a dead bedroom and were arguing. And she was doing girls nights out and weekends then I would be highly concerned.
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/23 02:19 AM
2

Break usually means she lives some where else so she can ride sausage. She may already have some one ready to go. How can you afford to have 2 places and she will want you to have the kids 50% and still ot for everything.
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/23 09:44 PM
1

Yeah these guys just want to pump And dump but they will say whatever to reach that goal. And yes I found the same issue when I was getting divorced. Although I found some FWB’s. Just be patient and hit tinder to hookup. You don’t live together right. So call it separated and divorcing and waiting for the decree.
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/23 09:41 PM
7

Yeah. She flipped the switch because she has another dude in the pipeline. Guaranteed.
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/23 09:38 PM
1

Dude. Don’t Look back. She will not change and those actions she took, just wave good bye. You need to work on you, go to the gym and get your body and head right.
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/23 09:37 PM
3

4 months! What a dumb ass. He doesn’t know shit about her. Strong successful male- you tube. He can see what happens when you don’t know you your with.
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/23 12:20 AM
1

It’s over man. You kid will adapt. Call your family. Tell them your plan for divorce. Attorney and plan in place to protect assets etc. Right before you drop the bomb call her parents and tell them why your divorcing.
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/23 12:16 AM
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