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chango01232020 Archive

View 3 posts and 65 comments by chango01232020 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
39

Rantchango01232020/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 07:08 PM
10

chango01232020/r/Divorce_Men08/06/24 04:42 PM
2

Spousal Support / Alimonychango01232020/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 04:27 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
6

Forget about her, and live your best life!
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/24 09:19 PM
1

Holy cow. I believe CS is typically based on gross, but either way dawmn thats painful. Im sorry to hear.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/24 09:48 PM
2

Damn! 6-8k per month? For real?
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/24 08:33 PM
1

Hell yeah. Enjoy every second of it!!
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/24 07:23 PM
7

Tattoos and a sports car. Feels sooooo good.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/24 04:31 PM
3

Ah yeah, to be a bit more specific I had just enough money for the essentials. I couldnt buy anything not absolutely necessary, no savings and pretty much paycheck to paycheck. For a long time, when I didnt have my kids, I lived off the very bare minimum and saved as much as I possibly could. Played old video games I already had, spent a lot of time outdoors. One summer I definitely had to lean on credit here and there, but with some advancements in my job and wages, Ive been able to bounce back…
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 10:28 PM
7

Broke as a joke the first couple years while I adjusted to my new life. Once I got things settled, budgeted, I realized I have more money than I ever did married because she wasnt around to blow it all. Financial independence is an amazing feeling.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 07:30 PM
7

When I was in the beginning stages of divorce, multiple people told me that women do this as a standard in effort to paint you in the worst light possible. Some are legit Im sure, but it is what it is.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/24 04:40 PM
1

Ah gotcha!
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/24 06:14 PM
1

Yeah I feel that. Ill also say, post divorce Ive had the most sex Ive ever had. There are women out there in our position who want the same things in life. Just had to give it time is all.
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/24 03:54 PM
1

Thank you, you as well!
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/24 03:53 PM
2

Thanks brother. I too divorced with young kids, and even though it reallllllly sucked during, now that the dust has settled its the best thing that could have happened. Got a second chance at life. Good luck to you!
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/24 02:34 AM
1

Damn, sorry to hear that. How much longer you got?
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/24 11:03 PM
2

Thanks bro!! And thats true, you really dont. We support the kids, ourselves, the ex, and if not then you get in trouble. Theres not enough support for men, but there should be.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/24 12:19 AM
2

Man I thought the same, I had it for four of six years almost. Support was around $2k a month, which was simply absurd to me, but law is the law.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/24 12:17 AM
3

I know, but its almost like she was but symbolically or something. Its hard to explain, but it was almost a mindset I couldnt let go but now officially get to? I dont know.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/24 12:16 AM
2

Exactly! Its hard to put the feeling into words.
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 10:47 PM
1

Thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 10:25 PM
1

Thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 10:25 PM
8

Partly, but also because she’s officially legally someone elses problem.
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 10:25 PM
1

Yeah, in my state it automatically stops alimony. But more importantly she is officially legally someone elses problem now.
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 10:24 PM
4

Thanks man. And I can soooooo relate. I wanna gove the guy a book on BPD.
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/24 10:23 PM
1

This is a really good point. Ideally we would like to avoid lawyers, but I agree, there may be no major need for support. Or at least as much.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 09:59 PM
1

No, didnt ask for more parenting time. But may consider that, as I didnt think of it until now. Thanks for the comment.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 09:57 PM
3

Ya know, youre right. Why am I just taking her word for it. Not sure honestly. Thanks for the comment!
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 09:57 PM
1

Correct!
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 05:13 PM
4

Its honestly maddening that alimony is non-deductible and the receiver doesnt have to claim it as income. I pay my ex more than minimum wage a year and to her its free money. Fucking dumb.
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/24 05:50 PM
6

Hell yeah. Talk about it, complain about it, bitch about it, try and laugh about it. But divorce is so hard. Dont believe anyone who says otherwise. You will be ok!
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/24 10:00 PM
17

This has happened to me multiple times unfortunately. And others have sent screenshots of her to me. But I will say, it sucks now probably because you are still pretty freshly out of it. In time, youll be able to laugh at it. But it takes time. For now, try to laugh about some sucker thinking hes winning.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/24 08:56 PM
14

Im a firm believer CS money should go to a specific card that can only be used on child related items, like an HSA card does for health stuff. That would be a major win.
/r/Divorce_Men28/11/23 01:30 AM
12

Man, couldnt have said this better. And never thought of the surrogate angle, but youre absolutely right.
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/23 06:07 PM
8

Which is total bullshit.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/23 07:11 PM
1

Man, good for you. My ex wife did me the same, and Ive yet to actually experience success with dating. Im working on it though and good to see a success story!
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/23 07:12 PM
6

Hmm thats interesting, thanks for sharing. Im curious why some states would adopt a no fault, but admittedly have not looked any of it up.
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/23 04:59 PM
10

Man, I had this mindset going in, even discussed the possibility with my lawyer but she said it wouldnt matter. I dont get why you have to sign a document and take vows when you get married, but anyone can break those agreements without impunity. Marriage is a farce.
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/23 01:53 PM
3

“The juice isnt worth the squeeze” hell yeah!
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/23 01:41 PM
2

Uhh yeah, before this list, marriage. Just dont do it.
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/23 08:23 PM
4

Cash! Start to find ways to stash cash that only you know of. Spend all your airlines points, halt 401k contributions, end any life insurance policies, pay minimum on the mortgage, liquidate stock,and plan to get out sooner so you dont wind up paying her bullshit alimony longer. (I realize this is extreme, but its what I wish I did).
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/23 01:59 PM
6

Yep. All of the materials aside, when you can be free of a person who makes you feel like this, its all worth it.
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/23 02:34 PM
2

Skip the marriage, just live together for a while. But not too long to avoid common law. Also, stash small amount of cash in places only youll ever know of and over time youll have an untraceable savings for when she cheats on you and tries to take all your shit. Not that Ive considered this…..
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/23 01:18 AM
3

Where/how did you meet the new partner? And would you consider marriage again?
/r/Divorce_Men09/08/23 06:04 PM
2

Hell yeah, good for you. I got my first forearm tattoo six months after divorce, because I always wanted it!
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/23 11:18 PM
8

Run, not walk. Because thats what I would do.
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/23 06:19 PM
4

Cant Hurt Me, was a life changer for me.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 01:42 AM
2

Its very difficult, but I have tried to not think of too much all at once and only whats in front of me. I figured obssessing on alot of it wouldnt change anything anyway. Takes practice but it helps.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 12:54 AM
4

I can sympathize with you on this. The stress from knowing Ive got to keep up payments for another ten years can get to me. For now, I just constantly remind myself its not forever and I know my kids are happy and healthy. Am looking forward to when Im done though.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 10:31 PM
3

Man, feel like I could have wrote this. Minus the whole letting her stay the night thing. My ex is so nosey and has zero boundaries Ive learned the best thing I can do is not engage. And, unfortunately sometimes I have to lie. Use that as a last resort though.
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 07:30 PM
22

Kind of seems like the focus here should be that this made news because his ex may have trouble taking half of everything, when really this shouldnt even be a thing that is assumed. I know it is, but this is a major problem with marriage. I hope this works in his favor.
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/23 11:00 PM
1

Well hey, thanks for sharing. Nice to see that it does work out for the men sometimes too.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/23 07:46 PM
4

I loved reading this, good for you. The only way this could be better is if for some reason she had to pay you alimony. But a win is a win!
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/23 02:50 PM
2

Very expensive per session life coach, while having a two year long affair….
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/23 05:47 AM
2

Feel you on this, though my ex is decent to the children. But to me, still the same old black hole of a person. I actually long for the days when I dont really have to deal with her anymore, but I dont think thatll be until the kids are all 18. But be the best person for you and ultimately for the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 02:15 PM
2

The financial black hole (2020)
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/23 04:52 AM
2

Short answer, yes. Long answer, yes. The courts dont care about lying. They do care about the safety of any children involved. Best thing you can do, is be the best person you can be during and after. Not all wrongs can be made right.
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/23 03:31 PM
8

Oh man, I am so looking forward to this day. Congrats! Alimony is antiquated and completely unnecessary.
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/23 01:57 AM
3

Document everything possible. But, have faith that the kids will know the truth eventually and always be the better person. Might not be tomorrow but theyll figure it out, and you will get to say that you always tried your best.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/23 10:58 PM
2

Three years out, biggest thing is Im no longer hung up on all that happened and am at peace with it. Relationship with kids is sooooo much better, finances are coming around. I think the one thing that is surprising to me, is I no longer feel I need a relationship. Maybe if something comes along, but the peace knowing I don’t need it, never thought it ever possible.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/23 07:17 AM
11

Man, feel like I could have wrote this myself. And unfortunately for most of it, you are right. Marriage is not what it used to be. My biggest regret in life is not staying true to myself and getting married, q mistake Ill never make again. I will tell you though, when the dust settles and the divorce has past, you will come to peace with knowing you and the kids will be just fine b
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/23 07:14 PM
7

Get a lawyer, keep your cool, document all the things and dont stop being a good parent to your kids.
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/22 07:24 PM
5

I still think its total bull that alimony is no longer tax deductible. It’s basically free money for her, and I get zero out of it.
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 10:03 PM
37

Sorry to hear. That was maybe the most crushing day of my life, at least so far. Was totally blindsided. But, in the end when all the dust settled, I was just fine. Stay tough.
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/22 11:44 PM
3

Everything is replaceable! Time to rebuild a new life, think of it as something not everyone gets to do. (Not easy I know)
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/22 04:12 AM
1

Man, same exact situation. Ive never seen or met someone else that was. I cant stand it. Pay $1700 a month in CS, and still get “billed” for half. One day I just bit the bullet and said, “isnt this what child support is for?” Since then, its been per the divorce agreement.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/22 12:55 AM
3

Was in the exact same position pretty much. In the end I found a way to pay it all off but she will forever keep with her what she did.
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/21 11:05 PM
2

Great question as I feel the same right now. So lonely and like itll never be better for me. Nice to see some of these responses though.
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/20 05:07 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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