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cvslengthbucketlist Archive

View 0 posts and 1,881 comments by cvslengthbucketlist on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

Having power over someone doesn't mean the person is going to abuse it. There are plenty of forms of potentially dangerous power imbalance between same age couples that no one freaks out about even though being more powerful in certain ways is what makes men attractive to women.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/22 03:37 AM
5

"I hate men" 70% upvoted
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/22 01:11 AM
3

To me the whole "women past 30 is old" is just ridiculous and is way for creeps to justify going after younger women. You're right, a mindset that says "all X are Y" without evidence is most likely a ridiculous one. I'd just be careful in phrasing the second part so you don't make it seem like you're trying to replace one form of shaming with another.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/22 12:11 AM
1

Lol it's fine, I'm not accusing you of anything
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 10:38 PM
2

Yeah I'm fine with your stance, just saying that I've noticed the double standard that you and some of the women here say you haven't noticed or doesn't exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 10:18 PM
3

Guys on PPD don't normally post about older woman age gaps calling them creepy or wrong. The defending is obvious elsewhere if you ever frequent advice subs where women generally get encouraged or at least treated with kid gloves when they ask about an age gap they're unsure of involving a guy half their age. I rarely see posts of women getting lambasted for dating young men in their 20s on Reddit. Even more so in posts where a woman will be worried about getting "too old" to date, and then they…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 09:59 PM
3

I'm not excluding young men from the blame for the double standard, but there are women who also excuse older women for dating younger, for solidarity and anti-age shaming reasons. Which I can understand but would be able to sympathize with more if they extended the benefit of the doubt more consistently to all sides.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 09:34 PM
2

Yeah it does depend on the situation
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 08:17 PM
2

I don't think most people "go for" 22 year olds simply because they're 22 and they think a year older is suddenly no good, it's more like you're in a social environment like a club and you gravitate towards a group of hot women who (unknown to you) most likely happen to be around that age. It's about probability. Which makes sense because you approach people you find attractive first before knowing their age, so unless the dude is literally rejecting a hot woman the moment she reveals that she's…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 08:08 PM
8

Not sure about your assumption, it's certainly not very obvious IMO. At least in 2022 society seems more forgiving of women who date much younger. Even when they get called "cougars" it's arguably meant more as a compliment than an insult, but still nowhere near the level of moral pejorative like creep or predator.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 07:55 PM
5

Sure but I did say twenties. Every age in your twenties above 20 passes the legal drink threshold so that's just a thing people say to make it sound worse. And people still judge even if they're well into adulthood.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 07:47 PM
5

what does the second one have to do with having a hoe phase? Presumably men who hit their "hoe phase" in their 30s will end up meeting and interacting with women during their "hoe phase" in their 20s. Similar interests, environments, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 07:38 PM
18

"Why are you still partying at 35? You're too old to be in a club" "Why are you dating young women in their twenties at 35? That's creepy" - easily the opinion of >50% of society including women lol
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 07:23 PM
-1

He honestly could've aged better, but he let himself go. If he drank less? Maybe, I don't know his lifestyle. But that's more of a behavioral observation and different from co-signing on aging-related insults. it's how he breaks with girls the exact moment they turn 25 that makes people cringe rather than just an age gap I absolutely disagree, I think the suspicious pattern of dumping them at 25 is just a convenient cover that most people (on social media at least) use to hide what really bother…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 06:47 PM
1

however a lot of people say women over 25 are ugly, so i can't judge a dude's aging? Lol I honestly don't understand this moral logic. "Bad person did bad thing to us, so let's do it back to them even though we called them 'bad' in the first place." Yeah I'm sure the schadenfreude feels really satisfying, but if you recognize that those people are assholes for rubbing "the wall" in women's faces and mocking them for aging, then why would you say the same things back about men? It's like, do you …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 06:30 PM
1

Well clearly whatever you're doing is working, you still get the attention from aging well and yet have the power to magically repel dudes who are scared of a "big" number.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 08:53 AM
2

Yeah absolutely, the reverse is how some red pillers might talk about the wall but won't realize that there are hot women over thirty walking around "under the radar" who you'd be surprised if she told you her age. That's why I always shake my head when young dudes mock women for hitting a certain age and turning frumpy in their eyes, or when young women mock older guys for being invisible to them because they're dusty scrotes or something. It's like, y'all are hurting yourselves with the age an…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 08:30 AM
1

He looks like he's constipated trying to restrain himself from interrupting someone's ridiculous argument
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 08:15 AM
2

Talked to him probably. But that raises an interesting question: how do young women on the internet and PPD "know" the ages of men "over 30" who they claim are invisible and non-sexual to them? By definition if you already strongly hold the perception in your head that guys look gross by a certain age, then you're not going to know or recognize if the cute 30 year old guy you see in public is actually 30 (or admit it to yourself) because most young women think 30 = "balding fat dude with a beer …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 08:08 AM
1

Men don't age better than women, that's largely cope. But what is true and the actual point in all this is that looking ugly or old isn't as much of a roadblock for men in terms of dating...for the simple reason that men can compensate for their looks in other ways. In other words, men are more shallow about looks whereas women are more forgiving if a guy has money or is confident, funny, charming, talented, sociable, or famous. So men have the potential to become more attractive with age in non…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 07:58 AM
2

They do have some points that kind of make sense generically but yeah their perception of "men" and "women" does largely happen to be 1% men and Miami club girls lol
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 07:51 AM
1

Lol I guess you haven't gotten to the part where Destiny starts talking at like 100 miles per hour. But yeah fairly rational discussion (despite being high-volume at times), all things considered.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 07:46 AM
1

It's like a 3 hr+ video so I don't know what your tolerance is but they have timestamps by topic and you can skip ahead to the juicy parts where they really get into it and take a look to see if you find it interesting. I would start with the intro and the first half hour of discussion to get a feel for the format but don't expect too much out of it from all the guests, it's mostly entertainment value lol
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 07:40 AM
1

The day after I complain about how Fresh and Fit always invite the dumbest girls to discuss topics on their show is the day they come back with the most intelligent and well spoken guests they've had on their panel probably ever. Not a high bar and still not a majority of the table but at least they're challenging the hell out of their points.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 06:39 AM
2

Best of luck!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 08:53 PM
2

I meant advice that's worded in undeniably restrictive terms like "Don't ever approach women in public because I think it's creepy." You could argue this kind of shaming language is growth-stunting and shapes the kind of men who might be more cautious, people-pleasing, or mindful of causing offense into developing a paranoia of rejection and social judgment. Learning how to deal with rejection and unintentionally causing/experiencing discomfort is necessary for healthy development, certainly for…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 08:46 PM
2

If you're already making 90k and up to date with your skills then breaking six figures is trivially easy with a job hop into any blue chip tech company, FAANG or not. I wouldn't sell yourselves short. You don't even need a technical degree, the CS industry is the most meritocratic one that way. "All" you need is demonstrated competence, and preferably a history of it too.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 08:29 PM
7

Because instead of simply just not giving advice a lot of women will give advice that is vaguely absolute, accurate only for themselves, and harmful to men. At that point you've gone past "not feeling responsible" towards "actively sabotaging."
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 05:24 PM
3

So that gives them the perfect excuse then to claim that no women are capable of challenging them in a debate. Too bad their hardcore fans won't acknowledge this.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 05:43 AM
2

Doesn't mean it's inappropriate either, just because some people think it's gross. We can't even agree on exactly how big an age gap has to be to suddenly become "inappropriate." Just grasping at what feels right. I've never heard a single argument for a specific, individual age gap being wrong that doesn't rely on broad assumptions about their character and about age gaps in general. Not one. The best someone could say at first glance with any certainty is "maybe it's wrong in this case, maybe …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 05:31 AM
3

It's kind of odd that she specifically told him about the drug habit but not the prostitution during the same time, which gives off the impression she's capable of "trickle-truthing" in the future to hide inconvenient facts.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 04:52 AM
3

LMAO watching the show is absolute torture the way that every once in a while one of the girls will actually get within two moves of checkmating him, but then folds immediately and ends up agreeing with him. And then Myron will just triumphantly conclude that women have no rebuttal because their definition of "women" is basically just Miami club girls who can't comprehend a question without being asked twice. It's like waiting for the DVD logo screensaver to hit the corner but the best you get i…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 04:44 AM
2

I refuse to believe there are no smart, successful professional women in Miami who also have an Instagram account. I think they're just selecting the dumb ones they can own in a debate.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 04:25 AM
6

The top comment is also explicitly advising her to seek therapy because her happiness seems dependent on chasing new things. "The guy changed" makes it seem like the husband is a bad dude or something for finding success and stability and settling down. OP has definitely also changed, namely in that she now realizes she's uncomfortable with comfort and suggesting moving to a new city to satisfy her wanderlust. Being "reckless" certainly isn't a good quality for a parent to have, so regardless of…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/22 05:46 AM
2

Lol of course, we did all come from Africa originally
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/22 03:38 AM
2

7.5 and ethnically ambiguous
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/22 03:21 AM
0

You know it's hard out here for a simp
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/22 03:17 AM
2

I see, more power to her I guess. It just feels a bit weird and ironic to mock your customers, like they're beneath you for buying the very product you're willingly complicit in producing and selling them lol
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/22 03:11 AM
3

Wait is she actually selling "services" or are guys just randomly asking for them?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/22 02:48 AM
4

Her being 18 was probably relevant to her being immature and obnoxious talking about vapid stuff and not taking the hint that people are trying to get work done.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/22 07:04 PM
2

They're probably cheering him on as a reaction to (mostly) women on Reddit shitting on him and calling him a misogynist creep just for dating younger women. So it's kind of a two-way battle of emotions between both sides.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/22 06:32 PM
4

Unless you believe women "hit the wall" by a certain age then it's odd to place so much emphasis on a woman "wasting" her early twenties as opposed to her late twenties or thirties. Hell, women in their early twenties also get into relationships with guys their age that end up fizzing out after a few years. Would that be a waste too? By that logic any relationship that ends in a breakup, whether amicably or not, is a "waste of time" instead of a life experience you can look back on. People date …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/22 05:32 PM
3

Asking the real questions... "BRB adding 'Bee Gees - Stayin Alive' to my sexy time playlist"
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/22 12:23 AM
1

I'm sure blue pillers will be fine with it, your description of them was...considerably more charitable lol
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/22 12:12 AM
4

Let's also not pretend that a man's anger is suddenly valid and proves he's right about the thing that makes him angry, when it happens to align with a point you agree with.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/22 12:06 AM
1

This is a meaningless moral test that you could easily dismantle by analogy. It's like asking a racist white man whether he would lose his mind at the thought of his daughter dating a black man. And then claiming that "of course" his biased answer should be taken as societal wisdom that somehow confirms the questionable morality of interracial dating. Most parents are overprotective by nature and inherently uncomfortable even thinking about their kids having sex with other kids the same age. Wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/22 11:52 PM
2

No part of my comment was an absolute statement or underhanded remark excluding female late bloomers as viable dating partners. I wasn't being prescriptive nor was there any "ignoring" going on. But obviously when you're talking about men being shamed for dating younger women, late bloomer women aren't relevant to the discussion because there's no moral controversy involved with dating someone your age in the first place. On the other hand, when people make absolute, universal claims without qua…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/22 11:18 PM
2

Nice cake day 😀
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/22 09:54 PM
1

I mean that if and when they find out you're tracking their devices (because kids are tech-savvy) they might lose trust in you long-term. Even in adulthood they'll be conditioned to keep things from you. There's definitely a balancing act where you can still be curious and observant about what your kids are doing without being secretive or disciplinarian.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/22 08:46 PM
1

Which goes to my point that the ones who are inexperienced get left out the conversation, whether intentional or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/22 08:40 PM
0

For most people looks are almost always going to be the first consideration for obvious reasons, but I mentioned experience precisely because a common argument against age gaps is that the older person is always assumed to have more of it to manipulate the younger one with.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/22 08:37 PM
2

Perfect example IMO of someone who fluctuates somewhere between a 5 and an 8 depending on the picture. I think her hairstyle and expression and posture make a huge difference.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/22 08:26 PM
8

That's how you raise a neurotic kid who quickly learns how to lie to you to avoid confrontation.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/22 04:37 AM
2

Then you go outside and you see people of all levels of attractiveness being lovey dovey with each other. You see it outside, you see it in your friends circles. But you're only going to notice the average people who are already in relationships and outside, naturally the ones who are struggling are going to be at home or invisible to you. When you see a guy walking by himself in public with a neutral expression you don't automatically assume he's having a hard time dating. People self-select th…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/22 04:25 AM
12

Don't forget that late bloomers are often ignored in the societal conception of "older men" and shamed on the basis of their age, for wanting to date much younger women on their level with as little experience with dating and relationships as they do.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/22 02:16 AM
2

Yeah that's a more literal definition I guess. But it's also used in common parlance to mean other things too. My point on marginalized groups was more about societal perception, and society's perception of incels includes anyone who seems like one based on a first impression. So any guy you don't know much about who has trouble getting laid and voices their frustration about women could conceivably be viewed as an "incel." You don't necessarily have to be an active member of incel forums to com…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/22 09:18 PM
2

Either way I wouldn't worry about it, looks like you pass rules 1 and 2
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/22 08:59 PM
2

Lol it says "good-looking" right there in the ratings guide in the sidebar, Mr. 5'6 pretty boy
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/22 08:55 PM
2

Any guy who wants to get laid but can't. Although more broadly it's also used as an insult for guys who technically can get laid but complain about how hard dating is.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/22 08:47 PM
9

One interesting thing about incels is that they're a marginalized group it's socially acceptable to criticize for speaking out against a perceived inequality. With poor people and minorities there's less tolerance of statements like "pull yourself up by the bootstraps" and "It's your attitude and your own damn fault that's keeping you down, don't blame others." And more willingness to make excuses for criminal activity by citing socioeconomic and psychological factors to explain why their action…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/22 06:38 PM
3

Even then he's probably not going to be comfortable enough telling you he's literally "addicted," just that he watches it from time to time. I doubt guys would even admit that to their guy friends. Plus I don't think deception is a great foundation for a healthy relationship, in the event that he actually isn't an addict and you start dating lol "Yeah about that supporting porn thing...that was a lie I was just testing you hehe"
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/22 06:12 PM
1

So then I'd choose a woman who has opinions and voices them but not in an overly argumentative or aggressive tone. If you have similar communication styles then you can express disagreement with humor and patience without turning everything into a shouting match.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/22 01:32 AM
2

OK, just trying to make sure I understood what you left unsaid.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/22 01:02 AM
4

Kind of a loaded question tbf, the terms submissive and independent aren't on the same axis. Plus only one of them has a negative connotation, you should use a more pure antonym like "domineering" that to a woman would sound like a distasteful quality in a man (instead of confident leader or decision maker) if the genders were reversed.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/22 12:45 AM
1

But like I'm making a calculated strategic trade off. I'm choosing to sacrifice money rather than time. Fair enough. I don't think it's more efficient money wise but yes you'll get a few extra hours to yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/22 03:40 AM
3

Yeah I guess, depends on your threshold for cheap and healthy. A lot of Asian restaurants give you plenty of food but usually it's oily, fried, or carb heavy meals. Plus there's considerations like low sodium, low MSG, organic ingredients if you care about those things.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/22 03:32 AM
4

Out of cheap, convenient, and healthy you can only pick 2 out of the 3. Eating the same thing can get boring after a few days but the feeling of having healthy, cheap meals ready for you in the fridge can be pretty appetizing. You have more control over the ingredients you prepare than you do even at healthy restaurants, adjusted for cost.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/22 03:14 AM
5

You can save time by cooking in bulk and preparing a week's worth of food or something. Also eating out is always going to be more unhealthy than making your own meals, so theoretically you're earning that time and money back in longevity and avoiding future medical bills. Plus it's cheaper to eat at home anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/22 03:00 AM
2

"But then why don't see see more asian male white female couples?" White Men are thirstier than white women. Why are you comparing white men with white women and not Asian men? I would presume the men are the ones doing the approaching and asking out regardless of race. Also how thirsty a guy is doesn't matter because the women have the final say anyways, nor would it affect what race they're into necessarily.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/22 05:32 PM
2

The way I see it a double standard isn't the discrepancy between an individual and their preference. A double standard is the discrepancy in the way you react to two people (of opposite genders) expressing the same preference. Since attraction is involuntary then there's nothing wrong with being one way and wanting someone who's another way, as long as you don't insult people who fail to live up to your attraction or feel entitled to have your attraction reciprocated. If it's fine for a man to w…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/22 02:38 AM
4

Interesting
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/22 11:21 PM
3

For men I would pair that with "put yourself out there." Like at the same time, not waiting until after you feel like you're far along enough in your self-improvement journey to finally make a move. Analysis paralysis is a death sentence for making moves, and confidence comes with familiarity with and learning from repeated interactions and rejection. Also "stop looking for love and the right person will come" is terribly worded advice for men because it implies success with a passive attitude i…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/22 08:42 PM
1

One doesn’t need to change one’s entire personality just to meet women. Practically speaking that's true if your personality is already appealing or you're a lucky person. More power to you. And yes of course changing your personality is very difficult. I don’t think that there’s anything wrong with being shy and introverted. This is a very interesting statement. I agree there's nothing morally wrong with being shy or introverted, just like there's nothing morally wrong with being physically und…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/22 08:39 PM
2

Introverted, shy just need to learn to stop pursuing Stacies and learn how to find the women whose personalities are closer to their own. That still doesn't solve the root problem though, at the end of the day you're still shy. Only now you're finding creative and self-limiting ways to avoid stepping out of your comfort zone. Why not learn to become less shy so you can pursue Stacies AND shy women if you want to. Plus it would benefit you outside of dating in every other area of your life as wel…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/22 06:57 PM
5

I don't see how birth rate has anything to do with desirability? People can date and have sex without wanting or having kids. Especially in a developed country where the cost of living is prohibitively high.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/22 06:51 PM
3

What's interesting about the whole neoteny controversy is how it hasn't yet manifested in shaming of men's height- or weight-based preferences in women, at least in popular culture. No one's alarm bells ring when Shaq dates a woman 1/2 his height and 1/3 his size, for example. (As long as they're close in age.) Even though most people associate "childlike" with short stature and petite frame.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/22 04:12 AM
2

I guess KD disagrees then
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/22 12:00 AM
3

Well if you're starting with "creepy" then you're already working with a heavily gendered term. I doubt most people in that sub are there for earnest discussion anyway, more likely they're just looking for ragebait to satisfy their dopamine fix.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/22 11:59 PM
1

Sadly a lot of men's standards are primarily looks-based
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/22 11:39 PM
2

I'm not sure what the mods can do to counter what women on OF decide to do or say to advertise their product, it's a different platform and they're technically not sending PMs to these men. You could post about it but they'll probably remove your post for being off-topic. Your best bet would be to comment about it but I doubt you'd be received well, given the sub's demographics. Or find a different sub and reference the original post so you can start your own discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/22 11:32 PM
0

Keep in mind those OnlyFans women probably aren't the ones shaming the older men, the real hypocrites would be the individuals supporting the first group's marketing efforts while advocating the shaming directed at the second group. Addressing that would be outside the scope of the sub, unless the double standard somehow came up in a discussion. That said, there's an equally common and related phenomenon where perfectly attractive older women selling sex or posting their pics will lie downwards …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/22 11:15 PM
1

I dunno I've heard some unsavory rumors about LeBron that may or may not be true.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/22 10:16 PM
2

Some girls will make the first move even if you are average. It just means you're probably better looking than they are (or at least they think so).
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/22 08:55 PM
–

Depends on the sport. Women's MMA fights are very popular among men as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/22 09:14 PM
–

That mindset has always seemed counter-intuitive to me. Why would you have sex with someone whose personality and compatibility you've ruled out for a long-term relationship, when the biggest risk is that you could get pregnant and stuck raising a child with said person together? Even with birth control and abortion you'd figure that would have to be at least plan C or D in a woman's contingency, if only subconsciously.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/22 09:01 PM
2

Aside from the more subjective stylistic choices you mentioned, most of the suggestions in your list are definitely things you should start doing right now so you can reap the benefits in a few years.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/22 01:03 AM
5

Yeah it does sound ironic, but then again you can't really blame someone for actually caring enough to want to learn how to not care so much in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/22 12:46 AM
14

Aside from getting tattoos if you're the soft-spoken kind of guy, I don't think any of those really comes across as being too tryhard. In fact, lifting weights, forcing yourself to be social, and not caring so much what other people think are all useful challenges for pushing yourself out of your comfort zone.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/22 12:20 AM
14

Because in general men don't feel as threatened by unsolicited or unwanted compliments. Plus most average men don't constantly get sexual attention from strangers so it feels more like a novelty rather than a nuisance.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/22 11:17 PM
11

The gotcha part seemed obvious already. A lot of Q4M posts are a variation of a different post with the genders switched around to try and fish for hypocrisy. Except in this case it's backfired because the two situations aren't really comparable.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/22 11:00 PM
15

Not at all, like straight men a lot of gay men tend to prioritize visual and physical attractiveness more than women, so if you get complimented on your looks unsolicited then that's usually a rough barometer of whether you're decently good looking or at least appealing in some way. And it possibly means your style is on point too. As long it's just a compliment without unwanted touching it's fine. It's like getting insight on what some women find attractive provided to you with the straightforw…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/22 10:57 PM
4

I think they say "talk to women you're interested in like you would talk to your male buddies," as a kind of overcorrection to the mistake of putting her on a pedestal instead. The more detailed answer would probably be to talk to her maybe 80% the same and have equally no expectations, but also learn to flirt and introduce tension in a way you would never do with platonic friends, male or female.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/22 08:56 PM
6

Isn't that just cultural differences? Women in certain parts of the world as well as women who are into anime subculture tend to be more accepting of thin, stylish men. OTOH women with conventional tastes who enjoy Hollywood movies led by beefy action stars probably aren't going to consider anime in the first place, much less care that there's a hunky cartoon protagonist.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/22 08:38 PM
4

Men's core preferences seem more shallow than women's because they involve traits like physical beauty that diminish steadily over time, so it's easier to call a man out for losing attraction and not "liking her for her" anymore within an observable time frame. Whereas with something like height it's easier for women to claim it's only one part of the entire package, because the only scenario where you could test a woman's waning attraction to her man based on that variable is in an alternate un…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/22 08:14 PM
1

Even on a college campus, 50% would be a huge stretch. Just because most women there are skinny doesn't mean they're attractive. In fact the cheerleader effect is no more relevant than in that very situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/22 07:46 PM
1

He could fix that so easily by changing future tense to past tense.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/22 12:43 AM
1

Lol yeah it's not the best optics, I get it. But even if you assume he's the one dumping them, keep in mind the average runway model is around 22 years old, and the average relationship that doesn't lead to marriage lasts about 3 years. So given that most of his exes share the distinction of being models and looks are clearly somewhat important to him, the math seems to work out. If it was about age for age sake then he'd be dating and hanging out on yachts with normal-looking or even ugly 21 ye…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/22 12:25 AM
1

In order to grow and achieve success in life you have to leave your comfort zone. That means sometimes doing things that might give you anxiety, or involve low odds or high social risk. This applies to men and women but in dating it's especially true for men because we're expected to be proactive. Instead of saying "never" cold approach, you can be strategic about it and learn how to best improve your chances of getting a positive or even neutral response for practice sake. Learn how to say thin…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/22 12:33 AM
2

Eh it's just a poorly-timed compliment that's mildly self-deprecating. Would probably work better in person with tone of voice, but I wouldn't call it insecurity though. Confident guys joke about how they "won the lottery" and scored a girlfriend/wife who's "outta my league" all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/22 12:01 AM
2

Personally I think it's a corny line but there's a difference between responding positively and being immediately suspicious of a character defect.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/22 11:54 PM
1

If post-WW2 culture in the 50s was indeed different from the 80s and 90s, then how could things have possibly just stayed the same during the equally long ~35 year timespan from the 90s until now? Change is constant, without question dating is different now in 2022. And you can't just say "aside from online dating" because that one advancement alone has had a tremendous impact on our current attitudes towards dating, namely why in-person approaching is more taboo nowadays. And don't forget the h…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/22 10:24 PM
6

Those dads grew up in a time where the dating culture was different and there were a lot fewer scenarios where shooting your shot with women was considered "creepy." Apples and oranges. That would be like using your dad as an example of how easy it is to afford a house and a car and a college degree on a lower wage as long as you work hard and put in effort. As a way of poking fun at "lazy kids these days whining about still living with roommates in their 20s and 30s." You're not taking "cultura…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/22 08:45 PM
5

On average they're highly correlated, so guys use "youth" as a stand in for beauty. Obviously there are ugly 20 year olds and hot 35 year olds as well, in that case for the average guy it's almost always about looks over youth for youth's sake. Dicaprio dates early 20s hot models because they're hot models willing to date him, not because they're in their early 20s. It's a correlation, remember. IMO the celebs you mentioned were more attractive in their twenties, but I would pick them at their c…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/22 08:09 PM
2

If I were a mouse maybe. Wouldn't be surprised if we saw the same headline again in 10 years with the same promise of efficacy.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/22 07:15 PM
2

They're not the same women, he's saying don't be discouraged in a general sense. Not that you should be persistent with the same woman who's already said "no thanks."
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/22 06:54 PM
3

Most self-aware 2XC member? Reading some of the other comments it's apparent how that sub's emotional bias on the topic makes them utterly incapable of seeing two logical moves ahead of their statements. If people are going to claim that you're not a real adult until 25 because that's when your brain fully matures, then there's absolutely no convincing moral argument you could use to claim that a 25 year old dating an equally mentally developed 50 year old is wrong, since they've both reached th…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 09:36 PM
1

I'd say that 75-25 merely exacerbates a qualitative disparity that exists in real life even with a 1:1 ratio. Naturally women tend to have more options than men (in general) by virtue of being able to attract her options passively. Instead of having to chase after them proactively.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 07:57 PM
4

talk to girls everywhere no matter what even if they dont like it This is the hardest one to mentally overcome and the most important for your growth IMO. Not everyone in life is going to like you or be your friend or respond to you positively even if you're doing all the right things with the right intentions. But that doesn't mean you're inherently wrong or flawed. You have to internalize the fact that other people's snap judgments are not a reflection of who you are or your values.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 07:46 PM
1

If the sample size of women on dating apps is big enough then it doesn't have to match the entire population of women to notice any correlations. But I think the qualitative factors are more meaningful here. I'd be more concerned about the type of women who self-select into the online dating pool and how that corresponds to their dating choices. Or I would look first at the nature of the online platform itself and how it brings out low-attention span behavior and the paradox of choice (even with…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 07:41 PM
7

Of course, only the bad ones post on relationship_advice, so we don't hear about the good relationships. Not really, only the bad ones get upvoted because it conforms with people's preconceived notions about AGRs, and out of those many are only identified as "bad" by the commenters despite the post details being neutral or even positive, and without any mention of cliches like "he said I was so mature" that would justify an assumption or concern. The only difference being that if you changed the…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 07:20 PM
3

Yes, I agree, financial dependency is the real issue. When people say large age gaps are an issue it’s usually things like this they are thinking of, though. I don't think that's the case, people almost always bring up the brain maturity argument first. Something about prefrontal cortex and your mid twenties. And people seem more accepting of age gaps when the older guy is rich because "at least the young woman will get something out of it." Even the popular "half your age plus 7" formula makes …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 07:05 PM
5

More sex partners and dating partners equals more life experience relevant to dating. The more experience you have the easier it is to gaslight someone who is a total novice at romantic relationships and make them second-guess themselves because unlike them you've been there and done that. Dating is a skill like any other that you can only get better at by actually practicing and making mistakes dating. Not by paying taxes or by passively getting older and celebrating birthdays. Those skills in …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 06:59 PM
2

Yeah I think I've seen this study before, very interesting
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 06:29 PM
1

Also age does not give you power in a capitalistic society and materialistic culture where "boomer" is an insult and age discrimination happens regularly in the workforce. Even in Asian cultures outside of the family, being older doesn't give you any real power. Only money can reliably do that.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 06:07 PM
3

No I'm agreeing with you
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 05:57 PM
3

That's like the asymmetrical "you can't be racist against white people" argument in favor of a new definition of racism, it completely falls apart on an individual level once you realize dating, like most human interaction, is between individuals with distinct personalities, statuses, and life histories...and not groups.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 05:55 PM
3

You're gonna have to be specific about which part, and explain your reasoning. This is a discussion not the daily chat. You mean women taking issue with larger age gaps? Or the practical reasons for said age gaps?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 05:50 PM
1

Not at all, it's harder to be a presumptive dick about age gaps in real life because they're not obvious if the couple looks similar in age. Since there's no "[33M], [23F]" floating above their heads. Also no one stalks your history and criticizes you if you're against age gaps (only if you support them). Since them being morally wrong is the majority opinion on Reddit. So people are much braver online when they're anonymous.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 05:46 PM
6

I have never seen a woman on her take issue with the idea of an inexperienced man preferring an inexperienced partner. Many women here certainly do take issue with that, by implication and sometimes directly, when that exact situation arises in the form of a discussion about larger age gaps. Since they rarely acknowledge the possible scenario of an older late bloomer guy preferring a much younger female partner for the practical reasons of them being on the same level in terms of dating and sexu…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 05:39 PM
4

Pretty much the level of argumentative sophistication you can expect on with the issue of age gaps, it's such an emotionally divisive topic that even people who might ordinarily argue in good faith forget what nuance is.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 05:27 PM
3

Lol I agree, I was just joking. It's an old meme
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 01:45 AM
–

It seems like neither gender is willing to give up the power they have over the other by using their n-count as a basis for moral judgment.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 01:36 AM
15

Girls literally only want one thing and it's fucking disgusting
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 01:28 AM
6

So then cold approach should be discouraged for guys who are incapable of being polite. Not universally discouraged.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 01:15 AM
3

Since dating involves complex emotions and isn't one-size-fits-all, it makes little sense to say to someone NEVER try this or doing that is ALWAYS inappropriate. Different people have different opinions on how they prefer to meet people.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/22 01:04 AM
7

Or maybe they just prefer women who are capable of communicating clearly and mature enough not to play mind games for attention.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/22 11:44 PM
1

Changing the definition of virginity doesn't really change the difficulty of losing it. If a woman already lets you touch her sexually then you're usually like 90% there. The hard part (and the meaningful part) as a guy is to be appealing enough to get to that point in the first place. The path from home to first base is way longer than the path from third base back to home.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/22 09:12 PM
3

The top post is about women being shamed for enjoying their "hoe phase"
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/22 08:25 PM
7

The flip side to the idea of women not being allowed to have fun in their youth is the idea of men not being allowed to have fun past 30. By the time they really start thinking about marriage, a lot of these same women will expect guys their age who instead chose to go down the path of delayed gratification (by focusing on their career first) to also settle down and follow their timeline. And complain about those who don't for not being serious enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/22 08:19 PM
2

Couldn't that just mean the ones you don't notice are doing a good job of bottling it up?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/22 08:44 PM
4

I think the most conventionally appealing men are confident men who straddle the line between rule-abiding and rule-breaking, hence where the "asshole" perception comes in. For men in the dating world, being confident isn't enough without being interesting, and being interesting often but not always requires you to be subversive or a maverick (instead of a goody two shoes). The best and most entertaining stories are usually the ones where the storyteller took risks and did mischievous or "crazy"…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/22 08:32 PM
1

So how does he reconcile lack of free will with the existence of moral responsibility? If a murderer's character is inborn then how moral would it be to punish the past actions (as opposed to simply preventing their future commission) of someone for whom it could be described as "within their nature" to commit?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/22 07:07 PM
2

but he cannot will what he wills That sounds like an argument against the existence of free will
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/22 06:39 PM
1

I see, thanks. Unfortunately I can't read the text of the post but judging from the massively downvoted score I'm guessing the women were still none too happy with the lower end of his age range. Although compared to datingoverthirty they're more mellow and silent about their judgment and less explicit in insinuating that OP is a creep.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/22 08:45 PM
1

Thankfully I don't spend much time on TikTok lol
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/22 08:27 AM
4

Personally my views are more sympathetic towards women with regard to n-counts and the marriage/aging timeline, but I absolutely agree with you on the moral posturing and shaming of age preferences part. It's usually inconsistent, one-sided with respect to gender and sexuality (older women and LGBTQ couples with age gaps get more leeway), and almost entirely a selfish impulse resulting from an oddly specific trust in age-related stereotypes that any decent person would recognize as bigotry if sa…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/22 08:13 AM
6

Lmao watching women seethe and inflict friendly fire in their aimless jealousy only to get silenced by personal example is almost therapeutic.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/22 06:26 AM
3

Right so the point is that ultimately it's more about convenience and fulfilling desire than safety. If heterosexual women were that concerned about strength imbalances and stuff like assault and physical abuse as the top priority over all other considerations then they wouldn't date men in the first place. The "type" of power imbalance is a contrived distinction that doesn't matter when we're talking about a woman's threat assessment. Women care about avoiding physical harm at least as much as …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/22 06:38 AM
2

There's so many other variables this would be really hard to study. But I don't think being too easily "bossed around" by women or relying on others to dictate the direction of your life would generally be an attractive trait in a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/22 06:19 AM
0

It's not that women aren't accused of having a height kink, that does happen. It's more that many women who eagerly date physically taller and stronger men capable of throwing them around will then turn around and attribute their mistrust of age gaps to the "danger of power imbalances." Which means safety is only the paramount concern to the extent that it doesn't conflict with said woman's sexual preferences and constrict her dating options.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/22 05:53 AM
–

I mean he's Tom Hardy, using a celebrity as an example on a dating forum is hardly instructive. You're a veteran, you should know this.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/22 02:56 AM
1

I'll straight up say "i'm not interested" and not feel bad abt it I guess that depends on how you say it, if your tone is polite and reciprocating a polite approach then that's not a problem. But sometimes guys might react to the rudeness of a rejection and not so much the rejection.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/22 11:08 PM
0

I'm kind of on the fence there. It's great to think that a grown woman should be mature enough to assess the situation rationally, but then again it's no guarantee that something involuntary like attraction can just change with age. Although yeah she was wrong for outright calling him a loser, could have said something else or nothing at all lol
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/22 02:50 AM
0

That's such a great scene and really makes you think. Usually people bring up the scenario where the aggressor is obviously stronger and more dangerous so it's more forgivable for the bf to comply and walk away without being a turn-off. It's also interesting because you can't really say with total certainty that either the man or the woman did anything wrong, and yet both their actions might make you feel uncomfortable regardless.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/22 02:15 AM
2

expected Mulaney
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/22 11:29 PM
1

With men you have the additional explanation that they could be single because they're introverted or shy. It doesn't matter how good your product is if you don't market it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/22 07:15 PM
1

You're not alone. I can't imagine not showering before bed without also constantly changing the sheets.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/22 05:22 AM
3

There are shitty people who record videos of strangers working out in the gym. If they thought someone looked or walked funny then that's all the reason they would need.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/22 02:30 AM
3

I haven't seen the movie but isn't the whole point of Predators having superhuman strength and speed meant to illustrate that human ingenuity is more important for defeating them, and therefore a man would only have a marginally better chance at surviving than a woman?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/22 06:57 PM
3

Maybe the virtue signaling type are becoming less and less common, but there are still women who will date less attractive men for the practical reason that being the better-looking one in the relationship gives them a self-esteem boost. It's more about that for them than any desire to "show off" their boyfriend.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/22 06:30 PM
–

But that's impossible, what could an early 20s kid and a 44 year old woman his mother's age possibly have in common? Your brain isn't even fully developed, and you don't even relate to the same pop culture references! In all seriousness good for you man. Although not so much for PPDers who seem convinced that large age gaps are just some godless fantasy that "post-wall" older men and women daydream about. The silence so far from the usual anti-age gap brigade is...notable.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/22 08:31 PM
1

if ugly people don’t even want to date eachother why tf do you think attractive people do? Because attraction doesn't work like a perfect one-to-one match on the 10 point looks scale. If it did that would solve a lot of dating problems. Also because ugly people can sometimes compensate with things other than looks, so everyone has non-zero odds on paper.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/22 11:50 PM
1

It's also because women can't exactly rape or kill grown men that easily If it's about the physical advantage men have over women then the age gap isn't relevant in the way people think it is. Because criminality involving physical violence tends to be higher among young men at around the 18-21 age group anyways, so a young woman even dating a guy her age who is stronger should already be a red flag following that logic. And male strength doesn't really increase linearly with age, it peaks at ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/22 06:54 AM
1

Not sure if we're mistaking preference for privilege when it comes to dating stats, but I see what you mean. I guess it's akin to the news media's hesitance in describing in detail incidents of crime in the news depending on the identity of the perpetrator and the victim. So even if people perceive a moral danger in both older men and women dating a much younger partner they could possibly manipulate, these people are still more hesitant to criticize women from a social justice perspective becau…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/22 06:07 AM
1

I'm referring to legal age gaps, you don't often see women get called a predator or pedo for dating a guy only a few years younger in online discussions (except maybe Twitter where people are very sensitive about any gap over 2-3 years). Predator is used in a fairly gendered way when people talk about legal relationships. I do see women who date younger guys get called desperate though, which is not cool. But my point was more about the same people who are okay with older women dating younger bu…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/22 05:38 AM
1

They’re talking about adults not children. Looks like you're already starting off in bad faith as no one is advocating dating underaged girls, so thanks for relieving me of the work of actually going through your screed in detail and legitimizing your "criticism" by addressing it point by point. You seem more angry that I'm raising valid observations than I am for noticing them, so much so that you're responding by...throwing false accusations. And trying to disprove my points by saying "no one …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/22 04:45 AM
1

Age gap discourse will never not be interesting to me because it's the best topic for exposing hypocrisy from all sorts of angles. - The hypocrisy of some liberals/progressives when they talk about letting people love who they love without judgment, and their supposed hatred of stereotyping people and situations that don't involve you personally. - The hypocrisy of people who mock incels for thinking in fatalistic ways ("women don't like short/ethnic guys") but will casually make the generic cla…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/22 04:23 AM
7

"Only problem" is doing an excruciating amount of heavy lifting in your description there lol
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/22 01:40 AM
1

Most are, even best friends. If one person feels like they're putting all the effort in the relationship by being the one to initiate contact all the time, plan things, and do favors, while the other person takes them for granted, then they'll likely distance themselves or drop the friend. You need reciprocation to keep a friendship alive, no one wants to be the punching bag.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/22 01:11 AM
–

Q4W part 2: Would your answer also apply on a matchmaking basis to any unattractive female friends you might have who you would consider equally looksmatched with said women and wouldn't mind setting up with the man?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/22 09:42 PM
2

I had a feeling you would respond that way, except you said "studies back this up" like you were trying to conflate and generalize your personal opinion onto "most women" which was OP's point. Most women at your age are okay with a 4-5 year age gap, unlike your preference or the studies that say ~2 years is the average would suggest.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/22 05:20 PM
3

Of course, if you become serious with them you still have to interact with their adult children. There's potential conflict and awkwardness involved with that too, because now they can freely voice their opinions, solicited or not. It's not just about raising the kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/22 05:17 PM
5

Saying 30 is "too old" for a 26 yo old stretches the limits of credulity and kind of invalidates your whole point. 4-5 year age gaps at mid/late twenties are absolutely common and normal, this isn't even controversial in real life. 10 years is less common but by no means a straight-up "no."
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/22 05:03 PM
1

It's about average, not too tall or short
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/22 02:11 AM
1

Would your dating strategy change depending on the answer?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/22 02:05 AM
11

"Actually she's a 4000 year old demon, you see..."
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/22 09:49 PM
2

"He's only dating a 21 year old because he knows women his age don't want him!" Also she looks like an older Pokimane.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/22 09:40 PM
1

That's that Tinder Schindler guy from back when Ukrainian women were trying to leave the country. I was hoping the grade A asshole thing was just a bad schtick but apparently he works in VC by his own admission so who knows...
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/22 06:27 PM
3

Ricegum's a massive douche but his looks certainly don't work against him. In fact the fuckboi image is part of his appeal.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/22 12:40 AM
2

Unless you know of every instance of what they were referring to then I don't see how you could claim that no woman has ever said "No women do that" or "Women don't do that." I've certainly seen some women here make those kinds of absolute statements.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 09:37 PM
3

I'm not suggesting anecdotal evidence proves a point, but it is more than enough to disprove a universal negative claim ("women don't do that," a sentiment that OP has presumably heard on this sub). Also you seem to think that people are demanding proof of every woman not commenting actually disagreeing, instead of a "similar amount of women." As in a similar proportion of agree/disagree in a sample size that doesn't have to equal the size of the actual population being examined to reveal a gene…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 09:18 PM
6

Throwing out ad hominems instead of addressing the actual point, I've never seen that tactic before! /s Also how convenient that of all the people on Reddit the only ones who need to touch grass are those who disagree with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 07:10 PM
6

Lol no one's asking for proof from the rest of humanity, the idea is that if short-man-haters were that unpopular then you'd expect at least the same amount of decent people or more to speak up from the opposing side and challenge their comments. That's the whole reason "ratios" exist on Twitter and "controversial" exists on Reddit. Unless you think good people all happen to be silent online.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 07:05 PM
2

I think each individual decides who is in their league, and if it includes you you’re in their league. It has to at least be reciprocal though. Because you can have people like delusional incels and entitled women without self-awareness who think they deserve the absolute hottest partner. So if Jenny thinks Mike is in her league then that doesn't mean much unless Mike also thinks Jenny is in his league. And vice versa. Even then you get people who might be unsure of themselves and will ask their…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 06:29 PM
3

Because you don't decide who's in your league, other people do. Just like you don't decide how good looking you actually are. If I call myself an 8 that doesn't mean anything without external reinforcement. For the same reason, saying my league starts at 8 is meaningless, because guess what I'm still rating myself indirectly.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 05:52 PM
–

This is why I don't put much stock in a lot of the "power imbalances are bad" arguments, they're too selectively and conveniently applied. If it were truly about safety first over the availability of guys who actually fit your sexual preferences then most heterosexual women wouldn't willingly suspend disbelief and endanger themselves by dating taller and stronger men to begin with.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 10:52 PM
2

There's not a huge difference between 32 and 34 where your range of available women drastically changes, those cutoffs are largely arbitrary. Assuming you don't look substantially older in those 2 years.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 08:28 PM
0

If you don't think people of different ages can have common interests then you've probably never seen a crowd at a sports game before lol Also common values are more important than common interests, because people can develop new interests or lose old ones but shared values in a relationship should be rock solid.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 08:01 PM
1

Income is essential and the most important factor, there's no widely used definition that doesn't include it. The starving artist with a trust fund example I already addressed earlier. Replace "income" with "income/net worth/how much generational wealth you have" for exceptional cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 04:08 AM
1

The article merely describes multiple competing conceptions of class, even the ones that suggest there are NO social classes (good luck with that one). So clearly they're not all equally respected definitions. The reputable sociologists' academic models and the practical definitions used by the Fed, the Census Bureau, NY Times, etc. all include income either exclusively or in combination with other secondary factors as defining "class." And empirically that's also the case, in that any political…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 03:37 AM
1

Income + net worth then for exceptional cases. But the average person doesn't have the benefit of smooching off their parents' generational wealth. Neither do secretaries who end up marrying CEOs. Income is THE most important determinant of class. The top 0.1/1/10% is measured by how much money you have because there aren't enough degrees and collars out there to stratify people into single digit top percentiles. In fact upper middle class is quite literally defined by your income range (percent…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 02:20 AM
1

Every job on your list is a white collar one. Working in a white-collar office job doesn't make you the same socioeconomic class as your company's CEO. Neither does having the same degree, as I mentioned. Those factors alone don't determine your "class." And you'd still have to explain the part about "middle- and lower-tier women often marry up."
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 02:01 AM
1

Your Atlantic source is paywalled and there are some dead links but even the Bloomberg source (with the really cool graphic I'll admit I never knew existed) explicitly says that male CEOs are okay with marrying their secretaries. It's only the female CEOs who look for other men at their level. High-earning women (doctors, lawyers) tend to pair up with their economic equals, while middle- and lower-tier women often marry up And being in the same industry or company as someone doesn't mean you're …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 01:38 AM
1

Sure. I haven't seen any but I'd be interested to take a look at any comprehensive studies that have analyzed this down to the actual professions of rich men's spouses. So IMO it's hard to confirm or deny that theory either way. Based on general male preference though it's not unthinkable that a man with money and status might not prioritize the same in a marriage partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 12:59 AM
1

I'm responding to the CEO claim specifically so of course we're already talking about outliers.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 12:54 AM
1

CEOs maybe not, but sports superstars definitely aren't above fucking with diner waitresses. I guess white collar executives care more about the optics of marrying their social "equals."
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 12:47 AM
1

What's the point? Should people force themselves to somehow change their preferences to align with statistical trends?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 12:42 AM
1

whenever their interactions with women they want to bang faces any kind of scrutiny or compares said scrutiny to literal racism Yes because as we all know racism has never manifested itself historically in the form of societal scrutiny over a black man wanting to bang a white woman...clearly there's no area of intersection between those two issues /s It's funny how you mention scrutiny of someone's sexual preferences like it's a trivial thing or some sort of gotcha, when it's the entire reason w…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/22 06:11 AM
1

If you want to give young women good and ethical dating advice then you teach them how to identify bad men by their behavior and personality, not by immutable traits like their age or race. Point out red flags consistently across the board in a way that doesn't hinge on looks/age-based assumptions or train women to develop a blind spot to toxic men their own age by harping on categories that tell you nothing about someone's character.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 11:42 PM
1

You're still not getting the point, which is that driving, drinking, and voting under 25 aren't considered taboo the same way that age gaps are under 25. Even though all those things have risks due to questionable maturity, often risks that are more grave for more people than going through a bad relationship. As a 23-year-old I have never felt at any point that I was being denied agency while being told about the negative outcomes of dating older men. It's easy to say you don't feel your agency …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 11:39 PM
1

I highly doubt that anyone is looking at "drive sober or get pulled over" and thinking "hmmm what demographic is that targeted at and I wonder if they should have voting rights." Right that's what I'm getting at, people don't normally have a moral panic about young people driving irresponsibly or being politically uninformed, and then use that as an excuse to assert that anyone under 25 isn't mature enough and shouldn't be driving, drinking, or voting. Whereas on the other hand people suddenly c…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 09:38 PM
1

But that wouldn't be informative either. Asking a woman her preference for or against old dick says nothing about whether she's mature enough to handle that preference. You'd need a psychological assessment to determine maturity, which is what actually matters here. The point is that we assume on faith without needing a psych eval that 24 year olds are mature enough to drive, drink, and vote responsibly...knowing the consequences of those actions are potentially as bad as if not worse for themse…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 08:09 PM
1

Right that's a dumb question because they only thing that matters is how she feels
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 06:13 PM
1

Didn't say anything about taking offense, just that the voting question is an absolutely valid one.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 06:08 PM
1

Exactly, more rights is better than fewer. And in the spirit of personal autonomy you always want to err on the side of giving people more freedom than you assume they can handle, because rights come with responsibilities.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 05:56 PM
2

Lol something like "How old is 25 really?" is possibly the most relevant question you should be asking and shouldn't be afraid of asking on the topic. Not least because it cuts at the kind of feminist double speak that says both "She's a WOMAN not a girl you sexist!" and "She's just a child (who can vote) and not fully mentally developed yet!" If you are old enough to make decisions that can potentially affect millions of other people then I'd like to see the logical thought process that says yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 05:25 PM
43

Proximity and novelty are two big reasons why people cheat. Maybe she thought he was more interesting or he was just in the right place at the right time. Either way that dude's personal life is a roller coaster.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 01:49 AM
2

It's deeper than that. FDS doesn't brag about being able to get casual sex because they love it necessarily, they brag about it because they know that men love it and have a harder time obtaining it. It's more of a "at least we've got this thing that men don't" move you see whenever they talk about stuff like struggling incels and "the Wall."
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 01:34 AM
3

At this point 2XC is basically an overflow tank for FDS refugees looking for a more permanent hangout spot to spread their gospel. Among other things they're notorious for being dogmatically one-sided about large age gaps being cool and subversive if you're an older woman and predatory if you're an older man.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 01:13 AM
4

They certainly do, it just depends on the topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 01:03 AM
3

I'm almost 30 and prefer men in their late 30s, early 40s. They have no business with women aged 18-25. Lmao that's just pure "stop stealing MY men" selfishness and a total lack of awareness. This woman thinks it's OK for her to date much older guys at 29 or whatever but another 25 year old woman is supposedly a child compared to her. As though there's a ginormous difference between 25 and 29...talk about arbitrary gatekeeping lol
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 01:02 AM
1

Nope
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/22 08:48 PM
2

I think if you're socially liberal then it's hypocritical to be conservative when it comes to dating ("guys who struggle with dating need to pull themselves up by their bootstraps, it's their problem and theirs only"). And vice versa. With RP I don't agree with some of their views but at least in principle they're consistent on the idea that you're not entitled to freely demand the service of society to fulfill your quality of life needs.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/22 06:03 PM
1

Have you never thought about saying something to someone before (a friend even) and then changed your mind because you hesitated and thought it over for a few seconds and realized it sounded weird? For some people making a move is like that except worse because the consequences of asking someone out and getting rejected are potentially more long-lasting than saying something stupid that doesn't personally involve them. ESPECIALLY in a work environment where your career is potentially at stake.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/22 01:40 AM
2

I don't think women liking guys who are taller and stronger than them necessarily disproves 50/50, since 50/50 is more about effort put into the relationship than power. But it does put into question the idea that women dislike power imbalances, since power differentials between the sexes (height, strength, athleticism, experience, finances, etc) can be attractive and are often what attracts people to other people in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/22 10:41 PM
6

Lol please be trolling...you quite literally addressed u/Spinning4plates usage of the word dysphoria/dysphoric without qualification. I don't think you understand what dysphoria is. It's not the same as feeling unhappy. Your own words. And for the record dysphoria is just the opposite of euphoria. Nothing to do with trans issues or unique to them. According to Merriam-Webster: a state of feeling very unhappy, uneasy, or dissatisfied (take a look at the example sentences) According to Oxford: a s…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/22 07:45 PM
3

You're the asshole for using "YTA" instead of you're the asshole.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/22 06:57 PM
2

You can always be thinner, look better
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/22 06:09 PM
2

No it's not, that's gender dysphoria. Look up the definition of the term "dysphoria" on its own.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/22 05:29 PM
1

Right, but presumably you would also be physically attracted to these 1-3 years older guys enough to date them, since it's not a sugar relationship. So essentially the looks-based preference is naturally already slightly age-gapped to begin with. Especially since men in their 20s tend to start looking more masculine later than women look correspondingly feminine.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/22 03:58 AM
2

If you mean much older men who look their age, most women probably won't be attracted but more than enough of a sizable minority will be. If you mean much older men who look younger than their age and can pass for a decade younger for example then it's actually pretty common depending on your ethnicity to the point it's almost a joke lol In fact you can figure this out intuitively simply from the fact that the VAST majority of women are attracted to men 2-5 years older looks wise and prefer them…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/22 03:34 AM
3

Plus you get microdosed with testosterone That's a vivid and hilarious description that's now stuck in my head
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/22 09:21 PM
4

Somewhat tangentially related, but I think it was Patrice O'Neal who joked that this is the reason why a lot of high-powered professional women (lawyers, doctors, etc.) are some of the horniest in bed and outside of work. Because for an entire day they're stuck in an environment where men are supposed to interact with and defer to them based on decorum and strict boundaries, which is great. But at the same time it almost feels sexually repressive and inhibiting to them in a way that by the time …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/22 09:09 PM
5

There's also a difference between "I feel uncomfortable around him" and "he's creepy/a creep." One is a physical self-report that isn't necessarily inherently judgmental of the other person, but may be influenced by preconceived personal biases and thus worthy of introspection. The other is usually a moral accusation of the other person. Hence the imperative "Don't be creepy," suggesting the creepiness is 1) some action they can voluntarily stop doing and 2) something wrong they intended to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/22 08:33 PM
2

If it's based on an assumption then yes, if his intent is obvious then no. It also depends on the context as well. If you're gossiping and laughing about a "creepy" dude with your friends based on a cursory impression then it's kind of shitty and meaningless. If you're warning someone else about a guy who you actually know is intentionally creepy then it's fine. If you're literally stuck in a potential life-or-death situation yourself where a guy seems dangerous to you then what's more important…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/22 08:18 PM
3

Was it only Hasan fans who claimed that Tate got obliterated or was that the consensus from the general Twitch community?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/22 02:15 AM
1

Do you also point at your reflection in the mirror and flex while you're hitting it from behind?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/22 02:12 AM
1

Whether the 26 year olds finds a 36 year old sexually attractive bears a snaller significance as most people don't sleep or have relationships with most people they encounter whom they find attractive. Sure you can't sleep with or date everyone you find attractive due to logistical impossibility, but the ones you do end up dating you'll at minimum be attracted to on average. And that connection supercedes traits that don't really tell you much about a guy's personality like his height or his age…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/22 02:04 AM
1

Divorce is a different issue than the one we're talking about, which is the initial attraction. Age gap attraction is not uncommon, which explains the consistent stream of personal stories and (controversial) posts in dating subs about it. And which also explains why the moral panic over it even exists, because people recognize it happens often enough to talk about. That said without knowing the guy's age it's kind of ridiculous for a 22 year old woman, let's say, to assert that they would be at…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/22 12:58 AM
1

I'm pretty sure I remember you saying that everyone cares about money and that we're all "gold-diggers" to an extent (because I agreed with you). So to your point a man's money is at least as important as his age if not more. And his looks and personality are going to be more important to a great extent as well because the first impression and the "chemistry" is entirely built on those factors. The supposed rarity of large age gaps has been brought up ad nauseam on this sub, but the proportion o…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/22 12:30 AM
1

You can look young for your age even if the girl is younger than you. But you can't look tall for your height if the girl is taller than you.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/22 08:57 PM
3

Seeing some of the answers demanding gameable Yelp-style reviews and publicly listing all your personal identifying information a la "dating social credit score" reminds me of how unnerving it is that people are so willing to sacrifice their privacy for a sense of security and convenience.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/22 05:59 PM
4

If you're one of those who adamantly believes that "life experience" is quantifiable and matters in terms of minimizing power imbalance in a relationship, then the prospect of a body-count or relationship partner count mismatch should absolutely matter to you. At the very least it should hold more weight for you than a comparatively more ambiguous and less granular indicator like someone's age. Otherwise n-count is just a number that says nothing about a person's values or character or worth.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/22 02:05 AM
1

But what does it mean to have a very small chance of success? And more to the point how would anyone here be able to quantify those odds with any certainty? Even if we make a conservative estimate and assume your odds of success in a single interaction (one woman) are only 5%, your outlook improves dramatically over multiple trials (say, 40 women) because cumulative probability adds up very quickly that way. Same with college/grad school admissions and other phenomena with seemingly daunting low…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/22 08:56 PM
2

Exactly
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/22 07:32 PM
2

Yep, anecdotal evidence is meaningful for disproving a negative proposition by providing a counter-example. But useless for asserting its truth value, which seems to happen a lot in this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/22 07:25 PM
2

Anecdotal observation is useless for trying to prove that a phenomenon in dating never happens, or that some people holding on to the belief that it does or can happen in the future is somehow wishful thinking. Also it falls into the category of "fatalism" which is a no go on PPD anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/22 07:13 PM
1

It's really interesting hearing Wall discourse from both men and women on this sub, like some sort of revenge fantasy horseshoe converging on the idea that aging only applies to the other gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/22 05:21 AM
3

I think everyone implicitly understands it's a bell curve or if you're lucky a plateau. Different people have a different peak, for some people it's 25 for others 35.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/22 04:19 AM
1

How do they know the ancestors weren't also miserable while doing imperialism throughout the tropics in suits and hats?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/22 01:20 AM
3

or he is socially awkward But that's such an important reason though, I'm not sure why people always consider that an afterthought when trying to figure out the mystery of why a guy isn't successful with women.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/22 12:17 AM
1

But wouldn't the average blue pill woman think to herself "I don't need to change to get the attention of a guy that shallow who I wouldn't want to date anyway, I'm fine with guys who appreciate me" instead? You would think that that quality over quantity mentality would more likely kick in before even reaching the step where she decided to actually agree with the redpill idea that SHE is the one who needs to change.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/22 09:16 PM
8

If your intentions aren't creepy then somebody unaware of them calling you creepy means next to nothing. In order to overcome fear of rejection you have to learn not to put so much stake in the unwarranted and untruthful criticism that comes with rejection.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/22 08:32 PM
–

Anecdotal evidence is useful for disproving a negative proposition. But absolutely useless for making an affirmative claim about a group of people. Unfortunately the latter seems to occur very often on PPD.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/22 05:34 PM
–

I honestly think "incel" is a miscategorization and most of them are just dudes with higher standards than the women they sporadically get attention from. If they had a few drinks in their system then they could technically lose their incel status, but then again what would be the point of persuading yourself to have sex with someone you're unattracted to just to escape the label? Seems meaningless.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/22 05:21 PM
5

Sure but what usually ends up happening is that reigning in men's sexuality often goes beyond criticizing and correcting its overrepresentation (the actual issue you identified) and instead takes the form of actually demonizing male sexuality itself. You can correct a statistical imbalance without turning it into a moral judgment about the people you're trying to emulate and catch up to. Unless the claim is that female sexuality is inherently positive by nature and that male sexuality should ins…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/22 04:03 PM
7

But if male sexuality (sex toys, male gaze, etc.) is so objectionable then why encourage a female version just to match it in the name of equality? Instead of saying "men act like pigs so women should also have the right to act pigs" the response should be "men should stop acting like pigs so there's no more imbalance." This whole idea in modern politics that equality involves the right to lower yourself to your opponents' standard (instead of doing the hard work of making them rise to yours) se…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/22 03:49 PM
–

Is this a personal observation or based on statistics?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/22 01:57 AM
–

Lol you're talking like this is "the wall" except for marriage. It's more about location, lifestyle, and staying active than age, especially around that age. Unless you live in a really small town, being in your mid-30s, educated, and single is fairly common in a lot of big cities.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/22 01:33 AM
2

I love the cover art, very symbolic
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/22 06:54 PM
1

Looksmatch?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/22 06:51 PM
2

Ad hominems are a lot easier than addressing the actual point, that's why people love using them. They're an emotional distraction to make others forget that they're losing the argument. Plus they're banking on you to react to the incel part rather than demand the logical response they owe you instead.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/22 06:35 PM
2

I meant the other guy. Have some confidence in yourself bro!
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/22 06:29 PM
1

Illegible format Poor punctuation No engagement with replies 0/10
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/22 06:17 PM
3

"Women" aren't a monolith, so in fact yes the nuance of the topic has crossed my mind.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/22 12:18 AM
1

Yeah you're right, which is why I added "knowledgeable" as well. Nowadays with the ubiquity of the internet I think the state of being "informed" is more of an obligation than a privilege, and doesn't have the same historically elitist and racist implications that expecting a formal education would.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 10:48 PM
2

This might be my most undemocratic view, but I think a democracy only works in a society where the only people who are allowed to vote are educated or at least knowledgeable about the issues and candidates, and are actually taught their country's history so they can understand the context and consequences of certain legislation.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 10:27 PM
2

Usually that helps pass the time, and being on good terms with your team can help you in terms of office politics. But sometimes being too friendly with everyone can be distracting for getting actual work done. The benefit of being able to work remotely is that you have more power to pick and choose which of those concerns you want to deal with and when.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 10:23 PM
1

Interesting to see the conspicuously low level of concern over the power imbalance when their ages aren't explicitly mentioned
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 10:17 PM
2

No you misunderstand, the "don't approach me" part represents what some women say online in theoretical discussions about dating. Not what a random woman says in real life to a guy who is actually physically approaching her. You'd have no way of knowing in the first place if some woman you met in real life was that same online user, in order to respect her personal opinion on not wanting to be approached.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 09:47 PM
3

That's why I say "within reason," you can break social rules and approach someone in a way that doesn't involve actual harassment or violating consent.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 09:33 PM
5

It's not just confidence, it's also the willingness to break rules and be transgressive (within reason) as long as your'e acting in accordance with your principles and goals. That's one reason why some women will claim to have high physical standards or reinforce certain dating rules and taboos ("don't approach me unless you're X or we're in Y"), in order to weed out the guys who are either too scared or overly people-pleasing from taking a risk and even making the attempt in the first place. Ev…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 08:48 PM
1

Socially awkward hot women with low self-esteem and trouble with intimacy exist. Even hot women who are already taken could have been with only one or very few boyfriends long-term. So her n count would be low.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 06:35 PM
5

The double standard with demonization exists for both men and women but in opposite directions. Men are generally exempted from slut shaming (high n count) while women are usually immune to the loser virgin stereotype (0 n count). Although recently it seems like "man hoe" and "femcel" are becoming more popular insults online.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 06:15 PM
1

Shy hot people exist
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 05:56 PM
4

I do get why many men would feel defensive about this issue though, especially if it's presented in an accusatory tone of "my potential safety is more important than your discomfort at being discriminated against. So don't try to #NotAllMen this conversation..." But when it's presented earnestly by someone willing to listen to both sides then absolutely I would agree it's a nuanced conversation worth having.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 08:10 AM
4

The fundamental problem with the "stranger danger" mentality that makes it such a thorny issue is that it not only involves discriminating based on gender (the left's cultural paranoia toward men) but also touches upon race and xenophobia (conservative fear of minorities and immigrants). In both cases people bring up the "small fraction of dangerous individuals" statistic to justify suspicion of the whole. Having said that I don't believe that totally letting your guard down is the sensible solu…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 07:56 AM
5

Everyone has different preferences, it's a bit weird to imply that other people are in the wrong for not liking a certain body type.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 02:14 AM
–

Have you ever met a neurodivergent chad before?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 08:52 PM
1

But it does get controversial when that protection involves the expectation that the person deemed the protector by society (willingly or not) take on an inordinate amount of risk to their life or health. It's basically the age-old debate between bodily autonomy (extreme individualism) vs. group welfare. I don't think either side has a monopoly on compelling arguments, although on this issue I do lean closer to the idea of self-sacrifice.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 08:45 PM
1

In this context I'm referring specifically to the morality of how whether the man is supposed to be the one to act. That's closer to what I actually meant to say
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 08:07 PM
–

Some would argue the least harmful/violent outcome is the most moral one. In this context I'm referring specifically to the morality of how the man is supposed to act. Especially in a situation where de-escalation is not feasible and you are entitled to defend your lives at the expense of the attacker's. But yes in general avoiding violent outcomes is the least risky and unfavorable one for the parties involved.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 07:54 PM
2

The desire to protect your loved ones isn't something someone instructs you to have. If you care about something or someone, you protect them. Those are your words for the reason that someone might have this unassigned duty, and that rationale don't appear to be gender specific at all. Nor do you qualify that statement by saying it only applies if the protector has a good chance of survival. I would assume that women also love their men, so logically it must follow that they also desire to prote…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 07:43 PM
–

It's annoying when people skirt the whole point of the moral question by saying stuff like "your odds of getting into such a situation are so low anyways."
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 07:38 PM
1

But most men couldn't protect a woman from an armed assailant with their bare hands either, that's a suicide mission. The way you describe it, the duty to protect someone you love has to apply universally where "it's the thought that counts" and not the result. Therefore by your logic if a woman truly loved her man SHE would eagerly volunteer to go downstairs to check on the weird noise in the middle of the night even if it put her life in danger. And even if the man doing it instead would have …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/22 07:25 PM
1

They're told they're bad at other jobs throughout their lives and those jobs are usually very unwelcoming to women. Yeah I'm not sure that's fully explanatory. I understand that there are sexist family members at home and "boys' clubs" in the workplace who tell women they're incompetent when they're actually not, and that shit is unacceptable. But if women who want to be doctors are able to become doctors in equal proportion to men in spite of sexist individuals in 2022, then why aren't women wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/22 10:18 PM
1

And that's a valid dictionary definition of the word. Most long-term human interaction has conditions and expectations. As opposed to an act like anonymously returning a stranger's lost wallet that can be considered selfless. Or a really generous friend who honestly doesn't mind if they're always the one reaching out to you and inviting you to hang out and picking you up places.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/22 09:56 PM
1

SOME women choose to work "women's jobs" out of personal preference for the work, knowing that those industries make less money. Not because their employers intentionally underpay them DUE TO them being women. You're reversing the cause and effect. If what you're saying were the case then the medical establishment would start artificially lowering physician salaries independent of market forces in response to more women graduating with medical degrees.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/22 09:50 PM
2

If people use bots to manipulate post upvotes on Reddit then I'm sure there are bots on Youtube as well. But with online personalities their fans tend to be really tribal in general, so they just end up agreeing with everything they say.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/22 08:01 PM
1

There's usually no real expectation on your friend to do anything for you at the amusement park or even on a kayak for you to enjoy the experience. (Although there could be, if your friend does nothing on the kayak and makes you do all the work then you might start to resent them as a friend.) With sex there's no "middleman" involved so both people have a responsibility to meet each other's needs. But speaking generally, yes even friendship is transactional in that you can't always be the one gi…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/22 07:33 PM
0

Yeah lots of people seem to use it that way, but the term does have other valid definitions which seem worth discussing in a dating context.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/22 07:14 PM
1

If there are expectations involved and the possibility of being appraised as "stingy" or "bad" by a dissatisfied partner in the performance of that activity then sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/22 07:06 PM
1

Right but that still doesn't challenge my point because ultimately those people don't have to sacrifice their OWN pleasure for that to happen. There's still an expectation of reward for your investment. Sex is basically you willingly giving up yourself and your body momentarily for your partner to fulfill their needs, while taking advantage of them giving up their body for you to fulfill your needs. If wanting someone you like to experience pleasure was a selfless act that could replace sex, the…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/22 06:42 PM
3

You don't need to involve money for a mutually beneficial interaction to be transactional. Especially when you're talking about a hookup where it's heavily looks-dependent, both sides are getting what they want from the other person who can provide it. Sex is not immoral of course, but there's no altruism involved either. The motivation is self-serving before anything else.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/22 06:26 PM
5

no dude, i actually think you’re awesome Yup, even as a motivational tool it would benefit a lot of guys to believe this. Everyone could use some more positive self-talk in dating, especially nowadays with social media making it feel like men and women's perceptions of themselves and each other are at an all-time low.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/22 05:13 AM
40

Nope not necessarily, I would assume her sleeping with me indicates my value, not her lack of value. I'm not gonna go through the effort of building myself up to who I am only to discredit all my hard work whenever a woman shows "too much interest" in me. To be fair that's not to say there aren't girls who are easy, but it's kind of a pessimist frame of mind to always think of it as her flaw instead of your appeal every time a girl sleeps with you "too fast."
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/22 02:10 AM
2

Sure I guess I can see that working, if you happen to have a really nice smile.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 10:47 PM
1

If you're talking about men and women in the same field, they're pretty much at income parity in their 20s and up until the age where women start having children. At that point the pay diverges for obvious reasons (more time spent as the primary caretaker, fewer hours worked). That's a cosmic injustice and a biological difference you can't really blame on the patriarchy, especially in Scandinavia where maternal leave policies are among the most supportive in the world. If you mean different indu…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 09:55 PM
–

Sure but aren't you agreeing with me then? That guy's likely gonna stay single.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 09:41 PM
3

I'm not sure what you mean by men's "interests being valued more." If more men are interested in becoming engineers, then more male engineers are going to exist. Same with more women becoming nurses. Best believe though that a female STEM applicant is going to be more sought after over an equally competent male applicant by hiring managers, in order to increase corporate diversity. Nothing wrong with that of course, but ultimately the gender income gap comes down to personal interest and persona…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 09:35 PM
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If he doesn't go out or talk to people much when he goes out then it's extremely easy to believe. Even a beta bux needs to have conversational skills and stories for when he meets women.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 09:23 PM
–

The only way equal rights guarantees equal outcome is if you assume everyone has equal ability and equal interest in the same things. Even a simple foot race analogy would disabuse you of that assumption.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 09:14 PM
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I have some sympathy for the women who at least try to engage in good-faith dialogue and question the mods' more controversial beliefs. But yeah the ones who use their experiences as an excuse to abandon reason and nuance and engage in "men are this/men are that" talk I don't feel nearly as bad for.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 08:36 PM
5

Of course, but self-improvement discourse on its own doesn't necessarily always involve mentioning female aging as a putdown or at all. Bringing up the age timeline for men is more of a reminder that the nature of dating success more closely resembles delayed gratification (for the average man) rather than "early-onset" or instant gratification (for women and attractive men). Generally speaking.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 08:30 PM
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Unfortunately they're also monetizing the desperation of victimized women who are sincerely looking to them for advice and getting fleeced by their cult-like tactics.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 08:23 PM
4

Yeah the devil's in the details, the truth is likely in between the two extremes of "men in their 60s can easily slay with college girls" and "men in their 30s are suddenly sexually invisible to college girls." My point was more about acknowledging that the proven benefits of self-improvement not only eliminate the one excuse for incels to sit on their ass, but also eliminate the kind of hamstering that women engage in when they deny that men can be attractive to much younger women as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 08:12 PM
5

I mean yeah we can laugh at that because it's obvious that improving yourself physically, mentally, and career-wise will help you attract women, but at the same time a lot of people here seem to think that the possibility of a man becoming more attractive to women with age is merely a redpill delusion or some sort of nerd revenge fantasy.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 07:53 PM
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Makes perfect sense, especially when you're young and don't have much money to demonstrate your status. Taking huge risks (athletic, comedic, etc.) is how ordinary looking guys show off to girls they're trying to impress, this is pretty standard behavior. If you like skateboarding you do a dangerous looking trick when your crush walks by, if you're the class clown you try to be funny by telling a risque joke to make the girl laugh when she's in your presence. It's the same with impressing other …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 07:31 PM
2

If it was manipulation most 13 year olds would be into 10 year olds. That's a good point. The age related pattern of male physical attraction towards women more closely resembles a normal distribution with males from opposite ends of an age range idealizing a peak female age in between the two extremes (with under 25s looking upwards and over 25s looking downwards, let's say), rather than guys consistently picking a younger female partner regardless of his own age simply because she's younger an…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 02:35 AM
2

I've noticed a lot of women also use "woman" synonymously with "attractive women" on PPD.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/22 12:40 AM
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That's a good point, you don't even necessarily have to give up all your "loser" traits, but you do have to develop winner traits to convincingly outweigh them.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 10:39 PM
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I feel bad for Woz, he seems like a humble guy but you can see the pain in his eyes whenever he talks about getting shafted by his friend turned business partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 09:03 PM
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I guess "being aware of your thoughts" is probably a better way to describe it than "observing them." And I thought that right thought does require as a first step that level of awareness of your thoughts in order to manage them, unless there's a different method that doesn't involve meditation.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 08:52 PM
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Meditation doesn't work that way, you can't will yourself to not think about something and then magically be able to do it. You have to make friends with your mind, observe your thoughts without judgment, and let them pass naturally. In other words you have to stop thinking about stopping thinking about sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 08:27 PM
3

Yeah that would make it even worse. Being able to accumulate wealth and stand out financially is the one advantage that men have to easily compensate for their looks.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 06:52 PM
0

Approaching women in real life (either in public or in casual group activities ) is the best option because it combines the higher volume of OLD without the drawbacks of being judged based solely on a profile. Also you have the advantage of talking to women in a low-risk, no strings attached interaction that either of you can easily exit if things get awkward.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 06:37 PM
2

Ok, sure? I haven't done either one so I'm not sure how that's relevant
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 07:47 AM
2

Fair enough, that's just my philosophy from personal experience
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 05:06 AM
1

Yeah...doing it well is the key phrase there lol But if you're an ordinary looking dude then I just think the potential for making yourself appealing to a woman is way higher face-to-face than from a static Tinder profile or whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 04:50 AM
1

I've asked friends for their suggestions before but tbh I don't spend much time on apps because I prefer in-person interaction.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 04:41 AM
2

Women's tastes are all different so it would probably be better to get the opinions of multiple women and pick out the common points of agreement. Also generally speaking I think the kind of person who's actually able to give you the most valuable dating advice (worth paying for) would be a guy who's successful on OLD and who looks as much like you as possible.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 04:29 AM
3

Not if it's a normal distribution. If she's a 6 in a room of 10 random women then there's probably 7 other women who look more or less equally as good as her, no noticeable difference. Plus one really hot one and one really unattractive one.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 01:19 AM
7

Yeah I think "Wanna come up for a cup of coffee" might be a better example.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 01:14 AM
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and possibly dissuade certain harmful ideas. Regarding the incel mindset that a certain population of high-risk, impressionable young men is likely to adopt, I think the problem stems more from isolation and lack of exposure than a lack of theoretical knowledge. Usually these kinds of young people change their views more readily from interacting directly with their peers than from listening to a "boring" lecture in class. But I do agree that more logical/critical thinking can be useful, for the …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 12:42 AM
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It's an interesting idea, although I think high schoolers would probably benefit more from learning practical skills first before getting into more technical or abstract concepts. Maybe something like a course that really reinforces public/group speaking and socializing specifically with people you're not comfortable socializing with. Which would go hand-in-hand with sex ed as the social skills component of that equation.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 12:28 AM
1

Yeah I understand, but I'm also trying to answer your question of "why that is." By pointing out the study (and the numbers) aren't very conclusive. Sometimes it's because of the transactional element you mentioned, sometimes incompatibility that all couples experience, sometimes different life experience. But sometimes it's simply due to social stigma and nothing inherently toxic or unhealthy with the specific couple.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 12:10 AM
2

The percentage of 1 year age gap couples ending in divorce is not 3%, common sense would tell you that's impossible. It's 3% more likely than the baseline divorce rate for same age couples. Which means if the general divorce rate is 40%, then couples 1 year apart would be around the same at 41%. A 5 year gap would be about 48%. And a 10 year age gap would be 56%. Not insignificant but not a walloping difference either. However, when you get to 20 year gaps it does make a huge difference, about t…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 12:04 AM
15

For hookups maybe, but if you're looking to date longer-term they should amaze you even when you're not having sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 09:42 PM
24

Dudes should start approaching more women they're attracted to. If that happens to be an average girl then great. Otherwise you're just wasting time.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 09:14 PM
3

anti LGBT, anti gay marriage It might surprise you to know that there are quite a few blue wave, pro-LGB(T*) liberals who oppose the idea of allowing trans athletes in women's sports. Apparently, taking the broad position of supporting the marginalized can cause problems when the ideologies or aims of certain marginalized groups start to conflict with one another.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 07:23 PM
2

Ah I see, so "preventative care" then.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 07:12 PM
2

Dealing with incompetent mental health professionals must be aggravating given how invisible the nature of the problem is. Imaging going to the doctor with a broken ankle and getting told "There's nothing wrong with you, it's all in your BONES!"
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 07:09 PM
0

Amen, no standards shaming!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 06:56 PM
2

So why not just go out and find your perfectly compatible soulmate, problem solved!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 06:51 PM
1

80/20 is likely real but not to the exclusion of the other 80% of men. Because many women who get a taste of the top 20% will also dabble in the average guy pool (even in their prime) simply because they're either not hot or lucky or amused enough to sustain a string of Chad boyfriends.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 06:44 PM
3

What would be your personal definition of "toxic but acceptable" by way of an example of something that red pill endorses?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 04:27 AM
1

They're mostly similar, but I'd say the biggest difference is that no one assumes a height gap is predatory or potentially power imbalanced or abusive when they see a tall/short couple. There's no accusations of "he only dates shorter women because he knows a tall queen his height wouldn't put up with his BS." Actually the even better equivalent to demonstrate the hypocrisy of the "potential power imbalance paranoia" angle would be a man's size. Meaning, women preferring men who are more muscula…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 03:59 AM
1

Shocked actually has the meaning "surprised" in its literal definition though, so it's not a figure of speech. Just saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 02:58 AM
3

If you're Asian you don't have much of a choice aside from the second option.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 02:38 AM
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Because your face doesn't determine your character or what you're capable of. "Deep" traits are those that you can't see from a glance and persist over time.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 02:32 AM
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Just because most people do it doesn't make it less superficial. Your face and body are quite literally the definition of superficial. "Regular" is a statement on popularity, not propriety.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 01:04 AM
2

No joke, without money you can't sustain anything else lol
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/22 12:59 AM
1

If aliens were truly advanced lifeforms then I feel like that would be illegal for them
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/22 10:44 PM
2

Oh hey it's bighuddi again!
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/22 08:49 PM
1

Tate is his last name
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/22 07:16 PM
1

What difference would it make if you get with a rich guy around your age at 26 instead of 20 if he's still going to cheat on you with someone younger when you start to look older at 35 (according to your worldview)? It's not like waiting those extra few years is going to slow down your aging process. Plus by your logic a rich 30 year old guy is going to have the option of dating younger women and working upwards towards 26, he's probably not going to start by looking at the pool of 30 year old w…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/22 05:09 AM
7

Same reason some leftists love to talk about toppling the system (instead of fixing it, which takes more effort). Usually people who feel disenfranchised also feel like they have nothing to lose, so that things can only get better if society were totally scrapped and remade in their image. Being at the bottom of the hierarchy gives them all the more reason to fantasize that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/22 12:52 AM
3

That's the ideal combination
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/22 07:04 PM
1

I'm saying skill-wise having platonic interactions doesn't make you better at hitting on women, that's something you have to practice in a non-platonic situation that's more expendable in terms of the social consequences. Obviously having friends opens a lot of doors for simply meeting people through your social circles, but talking to a woman like she's a potential partner involves taking social and sexual risk that may or may not jeopardize the dynamic of your friend circle. Something not ever…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/22 06:08 PM
2

If she's sincere about wanting to be friends then I wouldn't mind. Nothing wrong with constantly expanding your friend/wing-woman network.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/22 06:01 PM
2

Sort of but not really. IMO being able to have conversations with people is necessary for dating and relationships, but it's not sufficient for attraction because there are additional skills you don't learn simply from platonic interactions.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/22 05:55 PM
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Even the hobby subs seem suspect sometimes
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/22 07:42 PM
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That's disturbing. Makes you wonder how much of the content on r/roastme is actually from people with mental health issues attempting suicide by social media.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/22 07:15 PM
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My complete lack of surprise upon reading a whole ass article on consent theft and deceptive seduction without seeing the word "makeup" even once
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/22 06:52 PM
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Why would you hit on someone at a grocery store!? They're there to run errands, not to satisfy your female gaze!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/22 06:19 PM
1

Basically delusional or unsupported rationalizing, cognitive dissonance, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/22 04:57 AM
4

You've just described what female hamstering looks like
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/22 04:24 AM
1

Tell that to Bezos, dude's been trying to cheat death (and aging) for years.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/22 11:02 PM
2

I don't condone violence but the dude was a war crime denier and a massive piece of shit so I imagine a lot of people are going to feel pretty ambivalent about this news. That said this is going to have a huge impact on Japanese society, kinda scared for ethnic minorities who are going to inevitably get scapegoated by an even more galvanized right wing.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/22 09:40 AM
4

If the guy in his late thirties looks like Henry Cavill then general trends don't apply. Also they're just personal preferences, every woman is different. Doesn't mean you're fucked as a dude if you're too short or bald or old. I don't mean to call you out specifically but it seems like Reddit has an almost autistic attachment towards associating precise age difference with untenable relationships. People relax their standards in real life all the time unlike what they claim on paper.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 11:15 PM
2

That's not an unpopular opinion. People then usually say they like Batman because he doesn't need to rely on superpowers or suspending the laws of physics, only human ingenuity.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 10:30 PM
6

who's not a single mother Is this a joke? What flaw do you think he has that would make him unappealing to single women without kids?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 10:16 PM
2

I mean a lot of times I know everything from the dude’s age, whether he wants a relationship / kids, and even his politics and religion (bumble). These are things you usually don’t ask until you’ve been talking for at least an hour or two. "Everything" seems like a bit much, those facts about a guy only scratch the surface of what his personality is like. There's just no substitute for in-person interaction when it comes to personality. Also wouldn't you want to date someone who you've known and…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 08:34 PM
3

Usually you can get a sense based on your history of success/rejection, but on a philosophical level I don't even think there's any point in worrying whether your standards are realistic if that's really what you're attracted to. Assuming of course you've bettered yourself to the best of your ability. Getting into your dream school or dream job can also very unrealistic from a numbers point of view, but I don't think anyone with ambition would or should take seriously the advice of someone who t…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 08:07 PM
2

I think it's the reverse. In real life you would know all of those things just from talking to the guy, plus you'd have the benefit of being able to assess his body language, confidence, mannerisms, etc. So it's harder for him to hide anything in the moment. On Tinder it's a lot easier to fake a persona and traits like confidence and wit (never mind using filters on your pics), because you have all the time in the world to construct your "image." Plus it's easier to lie to someone when you're no…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 07:57 PM
1

So what are some examples of these other things you care about before looks that you can actually get a good sense of on tinder? In fact it seems like meeting guys in real life would give you an even better barometer of those traits than the heavily looks-focused nature of dating apps would.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 07:22 PM
1

It’s that there are so many pre requisites before looks start to matter at all. Just curious, if looks are not the first item in the order of things you consider in a guy, then would you be OK with using a voice-based dating app like Whisperr that doesn't include any user photos for you to look at?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 06:37 PM
1

It's not 100% certain of course but in this case it does look kind of suspicious, considering she could have dated literally anyone in her life who wasn't her boss lol A woman who wasn't intent on being hypergamous probably wouldn't have risked the potential HR nightmare and problematic power imbalance that comes from dating the billionaire you directly report to.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 06:08 PM
1

Hypergamy is from her POV, not his. It wouldn't matter if there existed another hypothetical woman richer than Elon because this one still has the option to date a guy who makes less than her. Now if she was unemployed or making no money then it would be harder to prove "hypergamy" but it still wouldn't exclude the possibility.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 05:45 PM
2

It's because you've overcome the mental conditioning of being so afraid someone will call you "creepy" that you won't even make a move. It's not easy to see past that in our modern culture and truly not give a fuck how other people think of you.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/22 04:20 AM
2

TikTok's popularity is proof that even young progressives don't care enough about China and other geopolitical bad actors to boycott its non-essential products.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 11:33 PM
4

According to PPD psychologists your story is impossible because everyone knows a guy becomes old, gross, and sexually invisible to younger women the instant he ages out of Reddit's "proper age gap" boundary. Young women have a sixth sense for detecting your real age at first glance that's more refined than a nightclub bouncer with the benefit of photo ID.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 09:59 PM
2

Damn social media is fucking brutal sometimes. Strangers tagging their friends to check out a comment publicly ripping on OP's girl for being overweight, even from other women. I hope for her sake she's taking it all in with a sense of humor.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 09:36 PM
1

Extreme high value isn't an equally geographically distributed resource because it's so rare. If a rich guy wants a girl who looks like the next big supermodel then he might have to fly her out from her hometown in Brazil or wherever. It's not about competition it's about supply. Otherwise any industry (Hollywood, tech, etc) could easily just find experts from their own backyard forever without looking abroad for generational talent and genius. Brad Pitt is one of the biggest actors of his time …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 08:35 PM
2

Lol yeah the 20k figure just seems like fodder for some good old NBA trash talk. I'm sure the players were very competitive when it came to their sexual exploits, so inflating your numbers was just part of that mythology.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 07:53 PM
1

That would still be a crap ton of orgies. Also I'd imagine past a certain small number you'd just end up with people standing around naked not really contributing but still getting counted in the official tally.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 07:47 PM
4

Wilt Chamberlain had 20k partners. Sounds like urban legend. Even if you assume he started having sex from the day he was born until the day he died that's still one woman a day for 60 years to even reach that number.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 07:40 PM
3

Yeah this idea that men will fuck any woman with a pulse is one of the strangest and most easily disprovable memes to come out of the internet.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 07:00 PM
3

Lmao is that the prime minister of New Zealand next to her
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/22 05:38 AM
2

There are plenty of male Twitch streamers who provide that perspective free of charge.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/22 10:54 PM
3

The question would be more difficult if you had specified "bad" instead of "average or bad." Average is kind of vague and easily acceptable in people's minds. I would choose to have a good second half of my life but only by process of elimination because it's not a very appealing choice either. Having financial security when you're too old and weak to work is the most important thing, but missing out on fun experiences in your youth can be damaging to your soul.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/22 09:41 PM
2

Casual sex may be more exciting because it's more unfamiliar, sure. But it absolutely can be transactional, it's just that the commodity you're trading for is a nice body or a pretty face. In the end it's about self-interest and maximizing pleasure, everyone benefits. There's no sacrifice or altruism involved.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/22 08:00 PM
1

(Notices the edit) Yeah that's what I was about to ask lol
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/22 07:51 PM
11

Yeah they're both superficial preferences. A woman picking a "beta bux" or a "sugar daddy" for their money isn't any more transactional a choice than the average woman picking a guy she's physically attracted to at first sight for his looks. The only difference is that the second woman can convincingly backwards rationalize to the rest of society that his personality was actually the deciding factor, whereas if the first woman tried the same strategy no one would believe her.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/22 05:56 AM
1

For when she's not in front of you in person I'm guessing. Same reason people have their bf/gf's pics in their wallet/phone, except the NSFW version of that.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/22 05:24 AM
3

Lifting weights can help you get more attention but you still need social skills to capitalize on that attention. Period. Otherwise you're just putting a spotlight on yourself for whenever you end up acting dumb or awkward in public. It's like any other "dating secret" in general that puts you in proximity with available women. It doesn't help if you're the only dude in your psych lecture with a girl:guy ratio of 100:1, for instance, if you're socially inept and nerdy. Edit: Social skills AND co…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/22 01:17 AM
5

Short bald guys are a dime a dozen, there's millions of them lol
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/22 09:53 PM
1

Because it's in line with the principle of wanting a guy who's taller and stronger than you so you feel protected, except applied to its logical extreme.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/22 09:42 PM
1

Ladies love a man who knows how to tickle the ivories
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/22 09:41 PM
1

There are other appealing instruments besides guitars ya know
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/22 08:38 PM
5

That's pretty funny, now that I think of it I've never seen anyone come up with a formula for "ideal n-count" before.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/22 08:37 PM
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Does this noble live-and-let-live sentiment apply to men having a stereotypical preference for younger women, or are we just going to cover our eyes and pretend that kind of shaming doesn't exist...on PPD of all places lmao
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/22 05:10 PM
2

That said I still think it's better for men to learn how to deal with rejection anyway. But giving women the social choice to make the first move would also make dating way better, especially in situations where both people are into each other but where the guy doesn't make a move because it would be more taboo or discomforting for him to do so given the environment. In that context it would be less creepy and safer for the woman to act first.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 10:04 PM
4

with the exception of a few brooding gorgeous autists, the guys being approached are probably not struggling to begin with. I disagree, a culture that encourages women to be more proactive romantically is going to benefit shy average men as well, by virtue of being approached more often by women in their looks range. Remember, even women who approach are now going to feel the same limiting feelings of fear of rejection and inadequacy that men have felt since forever, so they're going to be reali…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 09:57 PM
3

The men complaining about women not making the first move are not goingto benefit from women making the first move. Because women aren’t goingto approach shy risk avoidant wallflowers The guy being shy would have no impact on whether the woman would approach him in the first place. All he has to do is look attractive or interesting enough for her to make the move. Which makes sense because shy women get approached by guys who can't see her personality from across the room. The biggest source of …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 09:44 PM
1

Culture evolves faster than biology as well. As much as decades of feminism has done for advancing women's rights in the workplace and democracy, it hasn't really changed their longstanding physical preferences for men either.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 08:17 PM
2

That's kind of the point, I'm sure those words are meaningful to you. But those words are ONLY meaningful to you with 100% certainty because that's your opinion. Not every woman thinks the same way as you do, that's pretty obvious I think. Beauty is subjective, and so is the idea of when exactly someone becomes "too old" for you. Otherwise there'd be universal consensus on those terms and definitions.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 08:12 PM
1

it adds a fundamental layer of vetting. The fact that everyone knows each other is both a pro and a con. The benefit of the added layer of vetting is often negated by the heightened risk of unwanted drama and developing a reputation. At worst you have to be prepared to leave the group or force the other party to leave unwillingly. It's the "don't shit where you eat" principle extended beyond workplace romance, unless you consider the friend group expendable you don't have an easy exit strategy.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 08:08 PM
1

Women also call ugly and awkward guys their age who hit on them "gross" and "creepy," so those words are pretty much meaningless as moral descriptors.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 07:57 PM
1

"Rarely" is an interesting choice of words there, would you say the same is true for women past the age of 35/40? And by definition you wouldn't be able to tell if an attractive stranger who didn't fit your image of a balding, fat guy was over 35 because you wouldn't know their age in the first place, so they'd fly under the radar so to speak. Also if 35 year olds weren't attractive then where are all those age gap posts on Reddit and women's stories of dating older men coming from? Unless you t…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 07:51 PM
1

I mean that's just dating discourse unfortunately, it's all about perception and feelings. Like how women will set their age range on Tinder to 24-30 but wouldn't be able to explain why they think a 31 year old guy is suddenly too old. It's arbitrary to the point where we even make up formulas(!) for this shit, but in the end it's personal preference so you can't really do much about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 07:47 PM
2

I don't think it's that simplistic even in the English-speaking world. Terms like "cheerleader effect" and "butterface" unfortunately get used pretty often, and the women they refer to are often skinny as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 08:56 PM
1

I know about "the wall" and I don't agree with it. But that doesn't make it okay coming from women lol That's what confuses me, why do people on social media always call out toxicity on the other side and then do the same thing themselves because "they did it too, so it's OK for us?" If you're going to criticize someone then you kind of lose your moral authority the second you emulate their behavior and stoop to their level just to make yourself feel better.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 08:49 PM
0

For sure, I was just debunking the surface-level insults that people sometimes make about "men past X years old being unattractive." Beyond physical attraction (OP's point) there's more factors involved before getting into a relationship, usually.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 08:37 PM
3

I don't disagree with you necessarily, just my observations on how the rhetoric seems to change for some people here depending on the topic. That's why it's contradictory when older women claim that men in their 40s+ date younger because "women their age don't want them." Also when they claim that age gaps are wishful thinking because older men are "invisible" to younger women, despite always having handy personal examples of toxic age gaps. So it's like older men are either attractive to women …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 08:24 PM
2

I dunno, solely talking about physical attraction, it seems a lot of women in this and related subs, even the ones who are around Brad Pitt/George Clooney's age, will claim that these men were WAY hotter when they were younger in their 20s and 30s. Usually in the context of an age gap discussion to shit on the idea that guys their age are still appealing past 40, as some sort of counter-revenge fantasy (and unintentional self-own) against the RP idea of women hitting the wall.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 08:06 PM
2

Men make the argument that almost all women are attractive as long as they are not overweight. Anyone who's spent time in a country where the men and women tend to be skinnier than those in certain Western countries will attest that this is way too broad a generalization. Let's not forget that facial aesthetics matter too lol
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 07:14 PM
1

It's a bit meaningless to use "universally" and "likely" in the same sentence, that's like saying "I'm 100% right 50% of the time." The point is that it all depends on the individual, what other people your age look like isn't worth focusing on in terms of your own dating experience. Maybe it's an ethnic/racial thing, but I know plenty of men in their 40s who still have a full head of hair. And plenty of women in their 40s who look young for their age, for that matter.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 05:29 PM
1

Men shouldn't get mad, but women also shouldn't be shallow just because men are "allowed" to be. They should only be shallow because they want to, not to get back at men for their behavior by stooping to their level.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 01:39 AM
1

I’m only one data point That makes more sense, maybe lead with that disclaimer next time instead of trying to speak for a whole generation of women.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 01:23 AM
1

most people men Still being evasive I see. If staying away from generalizations feels like getting your teeth pulled to you then I better not catch you complaining about PPD stereotypes about women next time lol
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 01:03 AM
2

OP constantly using "hoe phase" seemed kind of suspicious to me. This is not a thing that happens commonly IRL at all. That said, you don't think women lying about being sexually promiscuous in a culture that shames women for being sexually promiscuous is a common thing? I'd imagine someone with lower self-esteem would have a lot of incentive to hide that fact.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 12:57 AM
1

Men are welcome to wait until they hit their forties and hang out in college bars attempting to pick up women half their age I'm not even suggesting anything like that, but apparently you're unwilling to even concede that I might have a point about aging and that maybe you're generalizing a bit too hard. I don't see your angle, do you actually agree with the type of thinking that says people (including yourself) hit the wall by a certain age?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 12:49 AM
1

Procedures don't reliably make you look younger as well as preventative care and genetics do. Yes women are better about staying on top of skincare but it's kind of a myth that men are totally ignorant about that kind of stuff. At least outside of whatever country/culture you're thinking of.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 12:43 AM
2

The difference between 5 and 15 years is gray and/or balding hair, a paunch, unreliable Work with me here, I know for a fact that you know this isn't even close to universally true. Plus if I said something similar about women you would probably object about the generalization being unfair and uninformed.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 12:38 AM
4

I thought this sub was critical of the kind of black-and-white incel rhetoric that says short guys are screwed since women don't date them because of "logic" and "evo psych." But apparently people don't hesitate to adopt that same fatalistic thinking when they claim that attraction is totally objective and mathematical when it comes to age difference as the variable. It's just odd to me why so many women on PPD demand nuance but won't stop hamstering about this notion that no young woman in her …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 12:21 AM
1

Lol do people...not realize this argument is a double-edged sword? So do you think 30+ yo old women are also "gross" and somehow immediately distinguishable from 25 yo women or something? Really?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 12:02 AM
1

To be fair, this sub is also full of people who strangely seem to think that an age gap is a more concerning power imbalance than a wage gap. As though "experience" can exploit or persuade people into blindly doing things they wouldn't otherwise agree to do, with the same degree of certainty as a wad of cash or a promise of material goods lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 12:00 AM
5

Getting into semantics here, but by definition if she's "interested" in you then she's not going to turn you down.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/22 07:37 PM
1

Man, because the attractive part going away as you age is less of a hit on your dating and social life, assuming you're already filthy rich. However if you're only envisioning your younger years instead of a long-term view then that makes the choice a little bit harder. Of course in all other areas you would still benefit from having an obscene amount of money to carry you until death, regardless of gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/22 07:28 PM
1

Yeah I don't want to get all dark and suggest that this is the reality for most older women or something. Just pointing out that people being more desperate for approval when they're younger (and having higher standards as they age) isn't necessarily true.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/22 01:31 AM
2

I think a huge reason why people piss the fuck out of other people on Twitter so often is because the word limit gives them a tempting excuse to leave out important words like "some" or "often" or "not all." And the more controversial you sound the more likes you get.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/22 01:23 AM
1

The older they get, the less everything revolves around their looks. I can see this being true relatively speaking, simply because you have more things to worry about when you're older so how you look occupies a smaller proportion of your mental space. And a woman with more experience has the potential to be more confident, provided she doesn't let past failure bog her down. But don't you think that the desire to stay looking youthful is a societal pressure that increases as a woman ages and she…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/22 01:10 AM
1

Again I'm speaking generally, all things being equal most people tend to relax their criteria the less time they feel they have to make a decision. I don't think that's too controversial a concept, especially in this context seeing how societal expectations for women becoming mothers by a certain age are still common. And I'm not making any sexist claims about women losing their value with age or anything either, but rather how human beings tend to perceive their own value, over time and without…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/22 12:11 AM
3

Generally speaking, they might be desperate for male approval but they're also extremely selective because they have abundant choice like you mentioned. And young women nowadays are very perceptive at identifying creepy men thanks to the culture, so I don't think they're necessarily more easily manipulated INTO a relationship. In fact you could even argue that some older women might be more easily persuaded (at least in the initial stages of dating) because they're working against time pressure …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/22 12:00 AM
1

Of course they can both be true. The point is that people who criticize tend to speak with the unearned confidence of "KNOWING" they're almost always true, or that they must be true for any one specific example. Even if both people in the example are total strangers, simply from looking at just their ages.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 11:47 PM
5

The self-deception is even more brazen when you consider that older women themselves understand the appeal of looking younger and the desire to use skincare, makeup, or plastic surgery to achieve that. Yet that understanding suddenly dissipates into thin air and the appeal of looking youthful somehow becomes absolutely mysterious and unfathomable when it comes to older men and attraction. Then it becomes 100% about "manipulation" apparently. Imagine if men tried to pathologize women's height pre…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 11:37 PM
2

Who is this "y'all" and what makes you think I subscribe to incel ideology or claim that they represent the experience of ordinary men? There's a lot of diversity of opinion that's represented here in PPD and I've never once complained about not being able to attract "average women" or painted women with the kind of "AWALT" generalities that are common in online discussion forums. Clearly you have a lot of latent anger that you're misdirecting at me and have managed to pack a helluva lot of assu…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 06:56 AM
–

I too only choose to date women who drink lots of water and stay healthy.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 04:05 AM
1

There's a wide range between the two extremes of feeling entitled to date someone you're attracted to (which involves actually blaming them for rejecting you), versus simply accepting your lot in life and just giving up any ambition to make yourself more attractive to your target demographic because "it's not worth the effort to improve anyway." Ironically, both are behaviors that women often report finding repulsive in men. Not to mention it's not exactly a winning attitude in life to be deterr…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/22 03:58 AM
4

Depends, if he's just being picky and would be happy with an average woman then I'd agree. But if it's an honest preference then unfortunately you can't force attraction or change your physical preferences. In which case he would be better off improving himself in order to improve his options.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/22 05:58 PM
13

Because the idea that a man can create attraction with a woman who isn’t attracted is ludicrous. The idea that a man can create attraction with a woman who isn't initially physically attracted is definitely possible, if you have an appealing personality or a sense of humor to offset it. And for repeated interactions, familiarity and proximity over time can make someone more physically attractive. Not to say you intended it, but what you're suggesting comes across like the kind of incel fatalism …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/22 05:45 PM
1

The volcel/incel distinction gets blurry when you realize a lot of guys with high standards but who still get attention from women they're not attracted to could be considered volcels, which essentially makes them the male versions of these women who hold out for Chad.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/22 11:42 PM
–

If Twitter/Reddit/social media are any indication, I've seen enough leftist/liberal "arguments" to know that mental deficiency has a very healthy representation from the entire range of the political spectrum.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/22 11:16 PM
1

Hasan is so intellectually dishonest I can't stand watching his content even for pure entertainment value lol Like he just rips on his opponents for being dumb but then avoids addressing their trickier arguments by throwing out big words and platitudes to distract his overly impressionable audience.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/22 09:45 PM
2

I know, but you can vote for the one party that you agree with more and still recognize that the other side makes fair points on certain issues. Which is a perfectly reasonable thing to do, but unfortunately saying "they do have a point though" is all it takes to be labeled an enlightened centrist.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/22 09:23 PM
1

"Enlightened centrism" is just ideologically dogmatic people trying to turn nuance into a bad word. Like Chris Rock said: "I got some shit I'm conservative about, I got some shit I'm liberal about." If you actually take the time to think through the issues like a human being then it's likely you're not going to entirely agree with either party on 100% of the issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/22 09:14 PM
-1

The real takeaway here is that this is the very reason why dating strategies like "be persistent" are often vilified and uncharitably framed as a bad or suspicious trait for men, because those people know deep down that it ultimately puts women at a strategic disadvantage. Not even in a sex pest, "learn how to take no for an answer" kind of way, but because they realize that time is a man's best friend in getting a woman to date "below her league" and actually entertain the shocking notion that …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 09:11 PM
1

Domestic abuse can come from anyone but it's a lot more damaging if the person is taller and stronger than you. There's a difference between being punched in the face by your skinny wife and between punched in the face by a dude built like Mike Tyson. As of course you know, women are also capable of intimate partner violence. You're right. I also know that you can be manipulated by someone your own age or even someone younger than you.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 07:51 PM
1

Unless you can honestly tell me you don't have an age preference then you're calling yourself a "pedophile" with that logic. Also things like height and muscularity encompass more than looks, they indicate a physical power and strength imbalance that can make a potentially bad situation like domestic abuse even more destructive for the weaker person. So singling out age as the only "bad" preference is a very selective way of addressing all the various sources of power imbalance in relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/22 07:33 PM
1

If a man only cares about your looks then technically you can have any personality as long as you're hot lol In all seriousness there's a bit of nuance in that having an awesome and hilarious personality can bump you up a point as long as you're not unfortunate looking.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/22 10:00 PM
2

Lmao no shit age isn't the same as height. Eye color isn't the same as height either. But they're all preferences, unless you're trying to redefine the meaning of the word. Also people who say age is a preference... Yikes. Again, how is it...not? If you have a preference against dating old men and prefer being with guys your own age then surprise, you have an age preference.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/22 09:04 PM
3

Pretty much, since men usually are the ones to have to make the first move and sell the idea of themselves, women overwhelmingly have most of the leverage in deciding whether to sleep with a guy regardless of their ages.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/22 08:52 PM
3

what's wrong with you that women your own age didn't like you? That would be like seeing a short woman with her tall boyfriend and thinking "what's wrong with her that guys her height didn't like her?" Don't conflate someone's preferences with the preferences of the other party that they rejected. Remember each party has free choice in the interaction.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/22 08:47 PM
3

I also think some people are upvoting the comments in discussions like these that they're aware are virtue-signally because they're ironically funny. Like when someone says something beyond ridiculous like how they're 24 but think all 22 year olds look like children then you know they're full of shit lol
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/22 05:41 PM
1

It's not just that wording specifically, a lot of people here have no hesitation expressing their negative assumptions about and distorting the meanings of certain preferences men have that don't involve them personally. So the preference-policing and shaming definitely happens on a general and discursive level even if it's not directed in response to certain users.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/22 04:48 AM
2

I think most people implicitly understand that people should be allowed their preferences and that you're not entitled to the attention of someone who doesn't prefer you. It's just that people who understand this (when it comes to male nerds criticizing the preferences of women) are often very bad at realizing this principle can work against their favor, and fail to recognize their own attempts at gatekeeping the preferences of others that they might not personally agree with. That's why you'll …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/22 04:29 AM
2

I mean people will watch two hour movies so
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/22 04:00 AM
1

Most men probably wouldn't openly date a 19 year old. But more men than that would secretly date one. Even more men would have sex with one without dating them. And the majority of men would have sex with an attractive woman if she didn't look obviously young and they had no idea she was 19. You can't societally shame away attraction, otherwise interracial marriage would have died in the 50s before the Civil Rights movement had time to take off.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/22 03:31 AM
1

If they didn't end up marrying because the relationship failed to last, then surprise...by definition they had to have dated in the first place for them to even break up. Which means your point about older guys not dating young girls isn't accurate to begin with at all. If you think men hit a wall at 27+ then there's no reasonable argument you could summon to disprove a sexist who claimed that women hit the wall at 27 as well. There's no such thing as an "older personality" or a "younger persona…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/22 01:39 AM
3

The idea of dictating "proper" attraction is a slippery slope that can easily be used to justify homophobia and prejudice against other unconventional relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/22 01:25 AM
1

I've always found it funny how dentists will ask you questions precisely during the moments you're not comfortably positioned to answer them. Probably not intentional much of the time but still.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/22 02:18 AM
3

Not accusing you specifically of being intolerant, but if you've spent any time here I'd find it incredibly hard to believe you can't think of even one example of a type of relationship that Reddit in general and PPD specifically might overwhelmingly consider problematic and not "beautiful."
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/22 01:54 AM
3

Dentists = Chads confirmed
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/22 01:29 AM
6

Every relationship is uniquely strange, with the potential to be beautiful. People aren't numbers. Lol I doubt there are very many people on this site who would actually believe that and apply it earnestly. IME most people, regardless of how politically progressive they claim to be, have their "one thing" they would find gross or objectionable and that they would eagerly declare an exception to the "love is love" sentiment. As noble as it sounds.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/22 01:12 AM
1

No what I meant is that having an age preference against older men for sincere health reasons is an amoral consideration and has nothing to do with morality. Not that the preference makes you immoral. That was a bit confusingly worded. I was setting up the idea that by the same token, poor health doesn't make an age gap itself inherently morally wrong either, just preferentially undesirable. Because many people (not you) will dishonestly latch on to the "women live longer, men die earlier" pract…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 10:19 PM
1

I have yet to see evidence for these types of relationships working out long-term The best you'll get is anecdotal for now, because any evidence for them working out or not would have to come from that same hypothetical study that actually took care to separate all the variables. I've seen success stories but usually people will just dismiss them as exceptions or assume the narrator is unreliable. However, I would advice young women (and men, for that matter) to becareful if they decide to date …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 09:17 PM
1

I wasn't talking about preference, obviously that depends on the individual.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 08:36 PM
1

I didn't downvote you because you seem to be arguing in good faith, but I think the reason why someone might is because ultimately you're still being influenced by personal and societal biases and making the discriminatory error of generalizing about a type of relationship based on the anecdotal experience of (some unknown percentage of) individuals. (If the majority of large age gaps are toxic I've never seen any study bring up quantitative evidence of that, nor could I imagine an experimental …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 08:13 PM
1

Interesting, but I'd disagree with "very few." At least you're consistent on this point though, which is pleasantly surprising lol
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 08:03 PM
1

So you don't think the average 30+ woman is capable of attracting much younger men then
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 07:53 PM
2

Ok so then why does it seem like you have such a hard time believing that a man in his 30s or 40s can be attractive to a woman in her twenties without being a "sugar daddy"? It's not like men age twice as fast as women lol
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 07:48 PM
3

Just curious, do you think a woman in her 30s or 40s can be attractive to a man in his twenties?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 07:36 PM
3

Most of those women weren't attracted to their bfs for their money, in fact a lot of the stories involved complaining that the guy wasn't pulling his weight financially or something like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 07:20 PM
4

# of professed stories from women being taken advantage by "toxic older boyfriend" to prove that large age gaps are toxic: countless # of large age gap relationships anecdotally claimed to be in existence among one's social circles to prove that large age gaps don't happen: negligible Schrodinger's age gap strikes again
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 07:03 PM
6

Yeah I never understood how people don't pick up on the irony of making these one-sided age = looks arguments. A lot of the same women will claim that 35 doesn't look that different from 25 and that women can peak in their 30s and beyond when fighting against sexist stereotypes about "the wall," but then seem to think that men turn into bridge trolls once they hit 30 and are thus immediately invisible or repulsive to women in their early/mid 20s.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 06:57 PM
5

When it comes to the 10+ age gaps, either the older man is above-averagelooking and the woman is average, or the man is average and the womanis below-average looking. That's an interesting angle and ironically shows that even women are guilty of excluding "average/below average women" from the definition of women when they talk about age gaps. Or that even if she's hot she "must" have daddy issues anyway, as some sort of convenient catch-call category for the exceptions. To the same extent that …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 06:51 PM
3

You're conflating dating with marriage in your statistics. A lot of younger women who do date much older guys don't end up marrying them because most young women don't get married at that age in the first place. But clearly there are still a lot of age gap relationships happening, if the constant age gap posts in relationship subs are any indication. Your point #2 contradicts your title. If it's about looks then there's a pretty sizable proportion of men (especially certain minorities) who relia…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 06:27 PM
1

Nope, as long as you have honest intentions then date whoever and however the fuck you want to date. Everything else is noise. I know it's cliche but you only have one life, and there's always someone who's going to have a bone to pick no matter what you do. It's better to regret doing something and learn from failure (aka "experience") than to regret not doing the thing and wondering "what if" for the rest of eternity. And for the record I think of Karens who obsess over who you're "supposed" t…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 01:55 AM
5

Sounds like a stealth version of that "all men are dogs so might as well date Chads, I'm not shallow for only wanting hot successful guys" argument that pops up every so often around these parts.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/22 07:05 PM
1

OK I disagree with most of that, but good to hear that you've learned to deal with that aspect of your life.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 03:40 AM
1

Because I like dick, but men who are assholes aren't worth all that level of effort. That sounds like a matter of perspective and personal opinion then. Generally I would assume that guys are willing to do more to get sex because its relative scarcity makes it more exciting. Like I said, you can get the O on your own. I just don't think they're the same, it's like trying to tickle yourself or hug yourself versus having someone else do it to you. And physiologically your body reacts differently a…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 03:20 AM
1

You don't like the women. So what more is there to it? You can intensely dislike someone and still find it worth your while to pursue them and spend time with them because they have something you want that only they can provide. You could call that using or exploiting the other person, but the psychology of it is fairly easy to understand.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 02:30 AM
2

Plenty of PPD men and women are guilty of eagerly voicing their disgust of others' dating preferences. And try to excuse it with "I would never say that to someone's face IRL, it's just my opinion. Why are you so insecure in letting it affect your dating life..."
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/22 02:26 AM
4

Yeah that's fair.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 07:17 PM
4

Why is being decent relevant to getting 🐱 I just mean it's what people normally expect of other people. Obviously if you're hot it's not necessary, and if you're not it's not sufficient.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 07:03 PM
47

Guys who act misogynistic who get laid are laid because they're hot not because they're misogynistic. Then women's advice to men as to why they're not getting laid should *begin with "you're not attractive enough" instead of "you're misogynistic." Since logically being a non-misogynistic, decent guy is a baseline expectation that's neither necessary nor sufficient for getting laid.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 06:46 PM
1

No the idea of allowing women in the workplace instead of staying home and taking care of the kids would have been shot down in a biology-first world. Nothing about the idea that men are suited for field work and women for domestic work suggests inferiority or superiority of either sex, just that you want the best people for each job, biologically speaking. I'm sure the later wave feminists would be outraged with you on your "biology isn't about equality" point.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 06:19 PM
1

And yet society is about minimizing inequality. Otherwise gender equality would make no sense as a concept, and you would be forced to accept ALL of men's sexual preferences as valid. That statement works against you on so many levels.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 06:08 PM
2

Speak for yourself, you do realize dating is about more than just orgasms right? Also I'm not sure how anyone who's had sex could honestly suggest that it's the exact same experience as giving yourself an orgasm, no difference at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 05:22 PM
2

Are you targeting a particular subgroup of members here, because of the many guys who have dating trouble and voice their frustrations online (which is quite a few of them) I doubt the majority think of women as "lesser" people.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 05:53 AM
4

Lol so just give up on difficult things when they start to bother and frustrate you? Sounds like a terrible attitude in life and the kind of attitude that encourages the incel mindset I'm guessing you would despise. How are you ever going to succeed at anything if your solution to your obstacles is to "just stop"...
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/22 05:46 AM
6

No you misunderstand, I'm talking about women who are more risk-averse nowadays due to the possibility of being traumatized, not women who've already been traumatized. That's why I mentioned "fear of the unknown" versus "actual trauma," not potential trauma. It's a fear that's always existed but has been greatly intensified by modern cultural politics dictating the idea that men's actions are generally driven by harmful intent. When women talk about disliking the idea of guys approaching or flir…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 07:57 PM
–

Honestly if it's something like cheating I wouldn't call it "oversharing" on a second date, more like being considerate in not wasting the other person's time. Seeing how cheating not even just once but twice would be a dealbreaker for most people.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 06:45 PM
6

If we're talking about actual trauma then sure. But that possibility has always existed, it's the heightened fear of the unknown and unwillingness to take risk that's modern.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 06:18 PM
12

Isn't the lack of openness and friendliness precisely what makes modern dating more difficult than it used to be? Especially when you're interacting with or approaching people in real life, our current culture has people walking on eggshells for fear of offending or being creepy and feeling inhibited from doing harmless things that in the past would have been more socially acceptable and conducive to getting a date.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 05:47 PM
2

To be fair if you're already starting off by identifying middle aged men as being out of shape and "norwood 2-3" (a term which I'd more expect coming from terminally online balding men and have honestly never heard an early 20s woman utter in real life), then by that definition you wouldn't even notice if you were actually attracted to a 30+ guy who didn't look like that. Which isn't rare at all..."30+" is neither middle aged nor a particularly narrow range. There are enough people out there who…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 05:20 PM
5

This argument always makes me laugh because every father would freak out a little inside at the idea of their daughter dating even a same age guy. That's where the whole "dad carrying a shotgun in the prom picture" meme comes from. Parents are already protective and awkward about their children's sexuality in general, and vice versa. You might as well ask a racist if they're okay with their daughter dating a black man. Their answer wouldn't say anything meaningful about the morality of interraci…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/22 04:59 PM
1

Yeah I don't disagree with your point, but I doubt many of the people here who viscerally oppose the idea of large age gaps and "superficial attraction" are that fully committed to the philosophical project that you're suggesting... ultimately everyone ages out of beauty ...because if they were then they would take the logic of that statement to its ascetic extreme and chastise themselves for even having looks/height preferences in a partner upon initially meeting them in the first place. Why no…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/22 08:33 PM
2

Maybe it's just because we're not far enough from the post-2000 decades for hindsight, but it feels like fashion and style changed WAY more dramatically between the 60s, 70s, 80s, and 90s than it did from 2000 to now. Nothing in that picture hair or outfit wise suggests it couldn't have been taken this year of a currently relevant celebrity with similarly bold taste. Each of those earlier decades had a particular and very distinctive "look" that was immediately identifiable, but everything after…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/22 08:18 PM
3

Depends on why he's intentionally pursuing younger women. If he's doing it to manipulate then it's immoral and gross. If it's a personal physical preference like any other then it's not really up for moral debate so long as we understand that attraction is involuntary. Plus it would be a waste of two people's time to force yourself or persuade another person to pursue someone they're not attracted to for the sake of maintaining "social propriety." ​ shows an unwillingness to accept his own age..…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/22 07:52 PM
1

There are plenty of couples that were not looksmatched when they initially met. Some people just prioritize other qualities besides looks, it doesn't always require a glow up or someone getting cancer lol
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/22 07:30 PM
3

Well there's not many ways you can express a joking or sarcastic tone through text, especially if you have a certain type of humor it can get misinterpreted pretty easily.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/22 05:17 PM
3

When I read an experimental conclusion like that I don't assume that they're describing deterministic behavior for all women, or even that it's anything more than just a correlation for the subset of women who actually fit the described behavior. Sometimes it's just interesting to wonder why, but the important thing is that I don't make moral accusations when I try to answer the "why" of the experimental results. Whether you're a man or a woman it's fine to react instinctively to different looki…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 10:20 PM
2

He sounds like he's just joking
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 09:08 PM
1

We can argue whether it's a financially or statistically wise decision, but the original point was that supporting someone you care about isn't "pickme" unless you already knew they were a leech and had no expectations of them putting in effort or returning the favor.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 09:06 PM
1

Agree to strongly disagree then. I get that there are people who are adamant about prenups and separating finances down to the dollar, but I can't imagine a loving marriage based on trust where neither partner was willing to at least consider helping out the other financially during a tough time. Like a temporary job loss, or helping to cover their tuition, or paying a greater share of the mortgage.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 08:47 PM
2

Depends on whether you're married or not and how serious your relationship is. Generally it only makes sense to call a behavior "pickme" if you do something for someone that you already know beforehand is reasonably self-destructive. Being supportive of a spouse who later cheats on you without any warning signs is not "pickme" because no one can predict the future and it's the right thing to do anyway. You can't be a pick me on accident.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 08:31 PM
2

Nah you just have to be self aware. If you're hot or outwardly rich then you'll get sex, otherwise be humble enough to realize you'll have to work for it like most normies. But proactive female sexuality definitely exists, you just have to meet a high threshold.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 08:15 PM
8

But was the guy actually "down" when the woman initially met and started dating him? I don't think leagues take into account future career trajectory or future aging.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 07:12 PM
1

Yeah that's the best case. Failing that it's just an ordinary guy who doesn't get attention based on his looks, but has gone through the uncomfortable experience of approaching women and learning from rejection.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 07:05 PM
2

I think the best dating advice would come from a successful guy who looks like you and has a similar personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 06:56 PM
1

Also this data set of emotion expressions: https://ubc-emotionlab.ca/research-tools/nucdsee/
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 05:26 PM
1

I think this might be some example images from the same study but it gives you a bit of an idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 05:16 PM
3

This is just conjecture and a bit stereotypical, but subconsciously a wide toothy grin might look goofy and the kind of smile a "nice guy" might make. While the male model/charming badass look involves a smirk that signals "I don't give a fuck," or even a no-smile expression of them staring off somewhere. It comes off as being more masculine or aggressive I guess but usually you have to be hot or muscular enough to pull it off. Edit: Also if you notice when regular people take photos with celebr…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 04:54 PM
1

Well it's just an emotionally polarizing topic that's nearly impossible to discuss in good faith without someone interpreting your words uncharitably or making ad hominem character attacks. Way too easy to call someone a creep or a jealous shrew and walk away without having to defend your arguments.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 04:36 AM
1

It's closer to "I feel disgust with older men approaching me, because as a teen I was exclusively harassed by much older men, so now they inflict run or flee reaction". That seems perfectly fine to me. Because at least you're self-aware enough to realize that your judgment is partly based on personal experience but also partly an involuntary reaction. Admitting that and more importantly the fact that it's still not cool to generalize all men in that group despite your experience of being victimi…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 04:25 AM
0

Yeah it's fine if you're merely describing a personal experience without trying to push a broader narrative. But it also depends on why you feel disgusted though. OK: "This predatory older guy once followed me into the parking lot and wouldn't take no for an answer" (simply stating facts without editorializing, based on a disgusting act that actually happened to you) Not OK: "Older men who date younger women are predatory" (based on preferential looks/age based disgust and assumptions about the …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 04:16 AM
1

on a few occasions it got me an angry "you're a bigot" response. Putting aside the fact that people often purposely conflate predatory or grooming situations with legal age gaps they're simply not comfortable with in general, it's NOT bigotry if you're strictly narrating personal experience or commenting specifically about certain situations after knowing all the relevant details. Or if you're faced with a potentially life or death decision on the spot. It DOES become bigotry when you start to g…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/22 03:52 AM
2

Nope but nice try lol I've seen enough videos of extremely talented but androgynous looking Japanese guitar players to suspect where this might be going
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 10:41 PM
2

It seems most men perceive most women to have similarly pleasant to look at faces. I have never found this to be true and can't relate to the sentiment that "guys will bang almost anyone," at all. Most women IMO occupy the middle 4-7 range of the curve, with a 4 being about as common as a 7 but with a fairly visually obvious difference in facial attractiveness between the two.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 10:14 PM
4

Right but I don't think your opinion is a majority one. Also "below average" encompasses a wider range than someone who is "truly ugly" in your words.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 08:35 PM
12

Of course, unless facial attractiveness suddenly isn't a thing anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 08:13 PM
1

That's good to hear! Yeah I mean in general we tend to value the judgment of our friends more, positive OR negative. Even if they're nice to us there's that fear of uncertainty.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 08:08 PM
1

Lol that makes sense. Friends are able to judge you for who you really are deep down in a way that internet strangers can't. "You suck because you're a woman" is uncreative but more importantly lacks the power to make you really contemplate your life in front of a mirror the same way that "You suck because you keep running back to toxic men" does.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 07:55 PM
1

I dunno if it's more likely for one fat person to be an asshole or for multiple skinny people to all be non-assholes by chance. Especially a young doctor at a hospital =P
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 07:27 PM
1

A lot of cities in developed Asian and Scandinavian countries are spotless, clean, and safe. It's not like they know things that we don't, cultural discipline can be cultivated. The socio part of socioeconomics deals with cultural attitudes that can modify human behavior through peer pressure and societal shaming. Meaning, things that might be difficult but certainly possible to change for the vast majority of people given time and conditions amenable to change. You can't make EVERYONE a good pa…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 02:08 AM
1

I wouldn't actively seek it out with women I wasn't trying to date but I wouldn't mind it, assuming they weren't repulsive and neither of us was in a relationship. I must have had what amounted to the strangest and yet oddly wholesome cuddle buddy-recipient relationship with a floormate freshman year in college to whom I made abundantly clear I was only platonically interested in her.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/22 01:47 AM
2

"Urban" isn't inherently a dirty word, only in places with high income inequality like the US. You can blame that on cultural and policy differences. The point of all this is that when people aren't wanting for economic stability and are able to prioritize other things then you drastically reduce the likelihood of a lifestyle that leads to single parenthood, crime, etc. Also anyone could attempt to reason their way out of any law or social expectation by asking "well what if some people don't wa…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/22 07:34 PM
2

There are no countries with less crime than the US where the gender ratio is markedly different from the US. Two people don't need to be married to raise a child responsibly. They just need to stay together or at the very least co-parent and be involved in the child's life. You also don't need to "force" people to be good parents if you provide them the material and psychological well-being to afford and realize what should be common sense: that you're supposed to take care of your kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/22 07:09 PM
2

There will always be a poor. There will always be crime. Obviously, but there are countries with dramatically less poverty and crime. It would be a bit premature to just resign yourself to the idea that it's unchangeable, without even looking elsewhere for ideas on how they've managed to fix the problem. So is saying “Fatherless homes cause crimes”. There’s no fucking to that either Of course there is, if you compare the rates of single parenthood now to what it was historically there's been a d…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/22 06:43 PM
2

What's the difference between Predominantly black men stuck in intergenerational cycles of poverty without a male role model are more likely to resort to crime due to those reasons. and Black men commit crime. The first one actually provides context and puts in effort to identify the socioeconomic factors that lead to criminality and not simply racial or immutable traits. The second skips ahead of all that reasoning and makes no attempt to qualify a broad statement blaming poor behavior on race …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/22 05:48 PM
2

I don't think they give out trophies for that
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/22 03:10 AM
1

Yeah it depends on your work, if you're coming home exhausted then it's basically a zero-sum contest between any number of things you'd rather be doing besides going to the gym or socializing. A lot of people with demanding jobs end up choosing to drink after work or vegetate in front of a screen.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/22 12:59 AM
1

Not having a job can hurt you in dating, but simply having a job in itself doesn't necessarily help you. It's a basic expectation for any functioning adult. In fact if your job is very time consuming then the "good sleep," "socializing," and "happy hormones" parts of your causal chain of events are likely going to be absent lol
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/22 12:39 AM
1

"Their brains aren't fully developed yet, it's not their fault for thinking that"
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 11:10 PM
2

Why would the people in Joel Osteen's church be pro-choice?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/22 03:46 AM
1

How do you pronounce FDS as one syllable, "fudds"?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 10:35 PM
1

Yeah I realize my advice is more applicable to a non-COVID scenario. Like I said, in the past couple years obviously people turned to OLD for lack of alternatives. But I doubt it's going to be a permanent shift once the masks are off.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 07:32 PM
1

I mean sure a generic dating app like Tinder is going to be more popular than specialty websites by nature of it being all-encompassing. I was talking more about filtering on interest in real life vs. filtering on looks online. As opposed to filtering both online. But either way OLD doesn't optimize for quality especially for women, and since they're the main drivers of traffic there's always going to be a demand for more organic, real-world methods of meeting people.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 07:28 PM
2

That's true, but as long as it's a recent pic and not altered then I just see it as an acceptable adjustment due to the camera honestly making people look different a lot of the time. Also people complain that professional pics often look contrived or cheesy. So a semi-candid pic showing your best self seems like a good compromise in my book. Maybe making literally the same pose in every picture is not the ideal strategy because people will notice and wonder, but it's fine to pick out a few of y…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 07:08 PM
-2

It's a scalable way for meeting guys based on looks, which are important. But trawling a local bookstore or record store is a scalable way of meeting guys based on shared interests. You're just substituting one variable for another. OLD doesn't funnel for other things besides looks that well, because the bio is often an afterthought or an "SEO keyword" optimization strategy for hooking people with interests and hobbies you think make you sound appealing. But when you meet them in the wild willin…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 06:50 PM
2

I get it but you can't just digitize human interaction. Most apps reduce our need for it, and even the ones that encourage it encourage the wrong character traits in people. It's 2022 and we still haven't created a social media platform that can fully emulate the nuances of face-to-face interaction. There's always some platform-specific fatal flaw or perverse incentive inherent in the algorithm that makes people act DIFFERENTLY than they do in real life, in some respect. Even if it's unintention…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 06:34 PM
6

Every new couple I have met in the past couple years met online. Guaranteed those numbers were skewed temporarily because of COVID and the restrictions. People aren't necessarily going to stick to OLD once there's more freedom of movement, any more than people will be happy Facetiming friends instead of hanging out with them in real life. As long as people are social and hang out in social environments you'll have IRL approaches.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 06:25 PM
5

If it's recent and unaltered then I don't see how it's catfishing, your best angles are quite literally what you look like in real life...at your best. It'd be weird if people were expected to post themselves from all different angles like a mugshot or something. Also even for some attractive people it's a kind of adjustment that makes up for oddly not being photogenic (which is itself the camera being "deceptive"), so that when people see you in real life your best photo is exactly how you look…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 05:58 PM
2

That's exactly what it is, which is why you can tell it's not sincere and more of a revenge fantasy.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 06:12 AM
1

On PPD? Lol you definitely see women make really passive-aggressive generalizations like "guys are literally invisible to college-aged women once they hit 30." The kind of statement that would make you cringe and wonder if it was an incel ranting about female aging and "dates of expiration" if the genders were reversed.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/22 06:02 AM
10

How would you characterize "no personality"? I think people generally get what that means, but describing it as not smiling, not joking around, and having a "monotone" voice would be more specific and accurate. Although even then not all of those would be dealbreakers in and of themselves. Attractive men who don't smile or joke too much are often considered "stoic, badass, DGAF" personality types.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 08:23 PM
1

But dating and losing certainly provides you with even more information about yourself and others to crunch on and make sense of so the same mistakes aren’t repeated then next time. Yeah there are practical benefits to dating early as well. Of course if you are lucky enough to find someone you'll spend the rest of your life with then you can make mistakes and grow together.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 07:31 PM
1

If that's not parody then his self-awareness and courage in being honest about himself is commendable. Also he reminds me of Ben Whishaw playing Q for some odd reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 06:42 PM
2

I disagree then, you can do two things at once, piecemeal. Otherwise that's how you end up with guys later in life obsessing about how they missed out on dating when they had a larger pool, and in an environment where people were more eager to have fun instead of tending to their responsibilities. Of course I'm not saying they're necessarily screwed or even that they can't make up for lost time results-wise, or that everyone thinks that way, but trying and failing while you're young can potentia…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 05:43 PM
1

Not everyone knows which traits have universal appeal because even the traits with "universal" appeal admit of exceptions (like attractive and financially secure men who aren't emotionally mature, or attractive men who aren't financially secure), so frustrated guys will see more successful guys who have found a shortcut around following all the rules and will try to emulate their approach to save time. And while these are all things you should be striving for, most guys in their early or mid twe…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 05:35 PM
1

That was my point to begin with, it's not useful to "ask people what they find attractive" anyway because 1) they might give a BS answer and 2) it's only applicable to one individual's preferences. I just focused more on the first point because I figured the second was more obvious.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 05:27 PM
1

Not everyone is forthcoming about saying those things explicitly, more often they just default to something vague like "you're not my type" so as not to seem shallow. More importantly they're only individual preferences, and aren't really helpful in providing an answer to the point you brought up about guys asking why they're not getting any attention from women or ignoring the one "glaring truth."
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 05:20 PM
0

Do you need data to corroborate that typically people in polite society don't go around openly calling women fat, or saying "I don't date fat chicks"? Or calling men short and saying "I don't date short boys"? Most people, even if they hold the same preferences, have tact and are strategic about not being blatantly honest, if only for self-preservation.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 05:06 PM
1

People euphemize their physical standards quite often because they don't want to seem shallow.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 04:59 PM
1

Like I said not everyone's honest, meaning some people are and some aren't. There's opportunity for mixed messaging there. Also even if everyone you talked to were honest, that would only tell you what those individuals specifically found attractive in a partner, and not what they assume to be unattractive in you. Unless they actually know you well enough personally, of course.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 04:51 PM
5

Because not everyone's honest about it. That's why discussions like these aren't very informative, because we've made certain preferences acceptable and others not so people have to tiptoe around controversy by giving politically correct answers.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/22 04:28 PM
1

Yeah SF pretty much stole the center of gravity from San Jose. It's the more exciting city in that it's less spread out and more picturesque.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 10:45 PM
1

Basically any (preferably dense but not always) city with either academia/industry or good weather tends to attract talent. Talent and density breed success and success consequently attracts rich people and beautiful women who congregate there. So places like Miami and LA as well. (Being next to a body of water apparently helps.) There's an interesting essay on the value of proximity in creating centers of power and wealth and why not all cities are ideal for these centers to arise organically.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 09:32 PM
3

Early Kanye's arrogance is what made his music great. His personality outside of that world is a different story though.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 08:41 PM
1

Sneaky way of saying you're fine with posting your own pics heheh
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 08:32 PM
2

Since power imbalances in this context are about gaps in life experience and personality more than a direct single variable you can't control like age I would use a more holistic method to evaluate an age gap case by case (akin to college admissions) rather than a numeric range assuming legality. The biggest thing red flag-wise to me is WHY there's an age gap (honest attraction, practical concerns, actual manipulation), whether the older person actually has more/less experience and whether the y…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 07:51 PM
2

You use creepy and predatory to attack men's standards of attractiveness for women, whenever a woman who meets that standard happens to be younger than what you personally deem an acceptable age difference. To say that you're okay with "all" standards and yet characterize them as morally inappropriate based on assumptions of bad intent is entirely contradictory.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 08:28 AM
1

Doubt it, yall throw around words like "creepy" and "predatory" way too casually around here for anyone to believe that you actually think any lawful standard that men have is "fine."
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 05:02 AM
2

Lol I wonder how many people saying "they don't judge" or that "all standards are fine" without enumerating them specifically are leaving out or overlooking the controversial ones that would make their answers seem less inclusive. Not much point to this exercise if people are going to be coy about saying what they really think.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 12:18 AM
2

Regardless, you would still find those standards objectionable even if they didn't.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/22 12:04 AM
1

Any standard is fine as long as you other people in this sub with differing views don’t bitch about it Are you sure there aren't any caveats to your statement that you might be overlooking? Based on your own past criticism of certain preferences men have that you strongly disagree with?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/22 11:57 PM
11

Consent isn't the focus of the issue, it's the expectation of controlling your desires. As in, "sex is a need for quality of life." Not "sex is a right I demand by force." The hypocrisy comes in when pro-choice advocates say that abstinence isn't a realistic solution because people (with or without partners currently) want to fuck and you can't expect them not to. But then many of these same advocates will turn around and say to incel types to stop complaining because "self-control" exists and "…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/22 06:58 PM
2

I hope he sticks with his fitness journey and posts after pictures of him smiling in 5 years.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 09:05 PM
5

When it comes to toxic men and physical safety: "Even a guy shorter than me could easily overpower me, men are just inherently stronger and more dangerous" When it comes to attraction: "Only a guy 6' tall could throw me around and protect me" I wonder if she's in the category of women who unknowingly believe both at the same time.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 08:39 PM
3

Well there are already a lot of people and groups that would agree with you. The problem of course is balancing public safety concerns for a minority of individuals vs parental responsibility and freedom to self-regulate for a majority of them.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 05:43 PM
6

Some very bad people on both sides
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 05:33 PM
2

Exactly, normal people can tell what's real and fake. Impressionable people with poor judgment or inhibition can't. So watching violent movies or playing violent video games can greatly increase the likelihood of real-life violence and aggressive behavior for those individuals. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2704015/ Would your suggestion then be to ban the depiction of violence in all media as a precautionary measure?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 05:29 PM
2

Movies depict real people in violent situations as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 05:09 PM
2

I don't know about that, that'd be like saying violent video games and movies are the reason people shoot up schools. Normal people are aware that these things are fiction and don't seek to emulate behavior that is obviously harmful, immoral, or illegal.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 04:55 PM
3

Different people react differently to it, some people might care and some might not. And even putting personality differences aside there's no complete consensus on this topic, just like many things in dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 04:39 AM
3

Which is why I don't prefer it, among other things.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 03:24 AM
2

Good luck and have fun with your date!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 02:42 AM
5

People hit on their friends even when there's no certainty of mutual interest. It's not ideal and it's probably safer with friends of friends or acquaintances but it happens. Just like the opposite situation where two friends have mutual interest but never tell each other until years later. Either way word can travel in tight-knit groups regardless of how many degrees of separation you have with the person. There's no guarantees with these kinds of things.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 02:41 AM
2

Yes it's actually kind of nice in a way, because you can blame any awkwardness or gaps in conversation on the language barrier lol Seriously though it's a great way to force yourself to be more emotive and interesting in order to get your point across, plus you can both laugh when someone makes a newbie language learner mistake. Excellent ice breaker IMO
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 02:32 AM
8

If making friends is your original intent, then it goes without saying that having social circles is essential to platonic socialization. Of course you should have friends. That's not the "failure" I'm talking about. I just focused on the dating part because the context of the post was primarily about sexual strategy. And it's possible the manosphere pushback to your suggestions was more focused on the idea that friend groups aren't essential to dating, not that they aren't essential generally. …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 02:28 AM
5

Yeah there's pros and cons to social circle dating vs other methods. Mainly the tradeoff between familiarity vs the long-term effects of failure or awkwardness. Works for some people but not others obviously.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 02:11 AM
16

None of those reasons really address the core issue with dating within social circles, which is that depending on how much you value them (and how disposable they are) you're still subject to the "don't shit where you eat" principle, albeit to a less extreme degree than a workplace/coworker situation. Even with meeting women through hobbies you still have to consider how much she values them. You don't want to potentially make things awkward and trap her with no exit strategy if you ask her out …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 01:56 AM
17

In terms of general mental health and just getting out of your house to socialize, agreed. In terms of dating, it's a mixed bag. Being in the same broad social circle is good if you have a good reputation or have proven competency within that circle. It's not so good or useful if you have a bad reputation or are relatively incompetent or simply don't stand out within that circle. Hence the part about "preselection": it's not a free meal ticket but it CAN work in your favor if the conditions are …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 01:40 AM
2

Sure there are products but the idea is that they're not guaranteed to work. Especially with things like hair growth which are highly variable.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/22 09:59 PM
3

Hairstyles and beards are dependent on your ability to grow hair and beards, so they're effectively immutable traits.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/22 09:46 PM
3

The whole point of consent is that it happens before the touching part, not retroactively. She was okay with it by chance, this time. But maybe another woman might not be. I don't think we want to instill in people the idea that they can get away with groping people if they're attractive. Plus even by "letter of the law" standards it's a really dumb move, if she feels differently about it later then he's not off the hook because guess what he technically didn't ask first.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/22 09:16 PM
7

I wouldn't say that literally every guy you're not attracted to must inherently have a problem, instead of just chalking it up to the fact they're simply not your type.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/22 02:29 AM
8

What's wrong with going after attractive men? Don't they do the same? There's nothing inherently wrong with that IMO. But if you're the type of person who's ever criticized the other side for being shallow then it makes no sense to do the same thing yourself the minute you're able to simply because "it's only fair." Which is why I find it interesting how a lot of the women on PPD will shame men for their preferences but demand that their own be respected.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/22 02:25 AM
26

If you reward the very people you consider toxic by giving them exactly what they want then you're both enabling their behavior and cheapening the value of your own criticism by leaving it for others to follow but not yourself. There's no wiggle room on this point, it's definitionally contradictory. It's not like refusing to have sex with them would make them any better You can't be serious
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/22 11:50 PM
1

Guys using women for sex isn't so much rejection as it is lying about their intentions. Of course that's still a scummy thing to do, but they had to have been interested in you on some level, however superficial, to want to have sex in the first place. Morally that doesn't change much but I'm just talking semantics. But the more important point is that you don't really minimize that risk by letting guys approach you first instead, since obviously the vast majority of guys make the first move and…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/22 09:19 PM
5

Why wouldn't a man reject you if he wasn't interested? That almost seems inherent to the definitions of those words.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/22 07:47 PM
2

Not a listener but I wish I knew how popular Stavros was with women before the fame so I could say whether his life trajectory is closer to blue pill or red pill theory in action. Either way the dude seems like a naturally funny guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/22 07:15 PM
1

The issue is that sometimes people feel justified in criticizing the preferences of others because they believe them to be immoral, often without evidence on the individual scale. Like the religious person who thinks dressing immodestly is a social harm. And in response society picks and chooses which criticisms they feel are valid, but very selectively and often based on the politics of the day. So even the principle of not imposing your preferences and shaming others' isn't applied with any co…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/22 07:05 PM
1

Who knows. Sometimes the trainers do actually reveal their workout regimen though
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/22 06:35 PM
2

People still following the Fight Club workout after 20+ years
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/22 06:23 PM
2

I agree the racial stereotyping element makes it genocidal in consequence, regardless of whether the targeting of race is incidental (due to overlap with concerns about their religion) or intentional (Nazi Germany). However the motivation part as I said is not so directly related to race. In China's case they fucked up when they decided to use a sledgehammer to crack a terrorist nut. Not to mention the Communist party is utterly incompetent at PR so they made "fear of minority extremism" sound l…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/22 05:57 PM
2

The detention of possibly millions of people in Xinjiang is an act of anti-terrorist paranoia that's more akin to what Israel is doing with the Palestinians. Basically using a few terrorist incidents in the past to justify detaining Uyghurs en masse in prisons (though not the open-air variety). Not for ideological reasons because of their "race" and only indirectly because of their religion. Obviously where they go a step further is the forced contraception and sterilization, which as we know fi…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/22 05:47 PM
3

I don't think people on Reddit are claiming that China has an "amazing" human rights record, that's indefensible at this point. They're more pushing back against the narrative that there's a "literal Holocaust" going on, unlike anything the US or its allies have ever done in the name of national security.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/22 05:32 PM
2

Lol nearly everyone on PPD does this to some extent, I can count the number of exceptions to this on maybe one hand.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/22 05:25 PM
2

Being skinny isn't enough to be attractive, let alone attractive enough for a picky rich guy. Otherwise plastic surgery wouldn't exist in Asia lol
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/22 12:41 AM
1

Those guys were some real jerks
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/22 11:12 PM
2

If you have the chance go and watch Norm Macdonald's final comedy special on Netflix. Really funny and endearing from a guy fully aware of his own mortality. There's no audience and he's talking to a camera so it's not technically "stand up" but I still enjoyed it a lot. RIP to an old chunk of coal
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/22 10:47 PM
0

The thing is that talent and competency gives you social status within a very specific domain. So unless you're generally famous then outside of your world you're still an unknown. It's very localized and doesn't necessarily mean you have high social status in general.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/22 05:06 PM
1

Contextual attraction also applies to competency as much as it does to looks. If you're the best snowboarder/dancer/kazoo player in a group of snowboarding/dance/kazoo enthusiasts then you can more easily get noticed by attractive women with those hobbies who would ordinarily overlook you outside of that environment. That's how some guys end up batting "out of their league." Also everyone knows the idea of your coworkers becoming "office hot" to you after spending time with them 8 hours a day, b…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/22 04:50 PM
1

I will say there's certainly delusion on this topic, from both sides. Guys tend to overestimate the receptiveness of young women to age gaps and their own appeal, while women tend to underestimate the numbers or claim they're just sugar babies with daddy issues. I think there's so much emotional anguish and personal baggage associated with the topic that it's difficult for people to approach it in the spirit of discussion. Instead we're all just trying to one-up each other with our own revenge f…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/22 07:20 AM
2

Your age is the dealbreaker, irrelevant to how you look. If age were a universal or even overwhelming "dealbreaker" then larger age gaps wouldn't even exist among normies for women on Reddit to constantly bring up their own anecdotal experiences of having dated much older guys in the past. In order to make either their supportive or disapproving conclusions we see so often in dating and relationship subs like PPD. Also I don't doubt that your friends express the same preferences as you do (at le…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/22 06:33 AM
3

everyone loves sleeper titties
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/22 02:52 AM
3

The fact that you have the assurance of the high n count Stacy never cheating or "doing anything bad" makes this a fairly easy question lol Not that I particularly care about n-count but it only matters in the sense that it's often associated in people's minds with risky behavior and a level of detachment towards one's partners. Once you remove all that uncertainty then it's a shoo-in for either A or D if you prefer fat women.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/22 11:03 PM
1

Lol so that's where that meme comes from
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/22 10:51 PM
2

It's usually due to stress or room temperature IME
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/22 08:32 PM
1

Because the majority of people don’t put their hands on their partners. Something doesn't stop being a concern because it doesn't happen to the majority of people, this is obvious from the political issues we focus on. And again there's no indication that the "majority" of age gaps involve manipulation, you seem to be making guesses on that part. A 40 year old and an 18 year old don’t even think and communicate the same way and you know that. Kudos for using an extreme example to discredit my ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/22 08:13 PM
1

Even if I date a guy 3 inches shorter than me he could still physically over power me. Right, and a guy 3 inches taller than you could even more easily physically overpower you, if we're talking "theoretically" about minimizing potential risk like we're doing with age. And how are physical dynamics not an essential part of relationship dynamics? You act like manipulation is worse than physical abuse. That’s the case most of the time because what do a 40 year old man and an 18 year old woman have…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/22 07:43 PM
2

If you don't think that a woman dating a man taller or stronger than herself presents a greater physical danger for her or gives him an advantage in a domestic dispute then you're not thinking rationally. What I do have a problem with is men pathologically dating women who aren’t established in life in order to take advantage of them. As do I. The thing is that you can't possibly know all that just from their ages alone, so that's where the critical thinking part of the debate flies out the wind…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/22 07:24 PM
3

Aren't you one of the many people here who loves pathologizing men's age preferences for younger women and turning it into some kind of moral emergency?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/22 07:13 PM
3

Let people have their standards. Lol kind of funny coming from you and this sub in general, but yes I would agree with that sentiment consistently.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/22 07:07 PM
3

She's been around beauty her whole life so the idea of having a model hot boyfriend is probably not a novelty for her.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/22 06:57 PM
1

Noooo, not Mister Rogers!
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/22 06:40 PM
1

You think most guys convince women they're dating that they're "Chad" or just that they're good enough for her? Better yet, does it even matter if you're not an absolute Chad as long as you're a relative Chad? Maybe that's the mindset that will save us all.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/22 11:04 PM
2

This is a great point. It might be a less common phenomenon nowadays, but the whole idea of a woman going home with a hot stranger from a bar presupposes that the guy is already attractive enough for the thrill of spending the night with him to outweigh the risk of not performing a background check in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/22 10:36 PM
1

I believe Tinder ID verification is already required in some countries like Japan, but their cultural attitudes towards the privacy vs. security tradeoff are so dramatically different from Western attitudes (US at least) that I would think twice about using that as inspiration for a business idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/22 10:33 PM
4

Easy 9, if that's not AI generated then there's no way she's not a model.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/22 10:17 PM
2

All squares are rectangles...
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/22 08:01 PM
1

r/nottheonion
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/22 05:30 PM
3

When you see the wife you're just like "Actually that doesn't make much sense"
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/22 04:59 PM
1

The term originated from American Pie I think and back then the idea was that the woman's kid had to be old enough for his friends to call her a MILF.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/22 04:09 AM
2

And the generation afterwards forgot that a "milf" isn't a 25 year old woman with a 1 year old kid.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/22 03:49 AM
1

Damn I didn't realize that was actually HIM singing, that's some crazy talent lol
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/22 06:12 PM
1

I'm getting Vegas magician vibes from the cover
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/22 06:08 PM
1

That was tongue in cheek, I just picked two things that men and women stereotypically complain about. Although tbf a lot of women also complain about dead bedrooms.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/22 05:54 PM
2

That mystique was bound to disappear at some point anyway, so the benefit of developing social skills and exposure earlier on was probably worth it.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/22 03:54 AM
1

Hodor
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/22 03:06 AM
2

I do know some things...
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/22 02:54 AM
1

Your overconfidence is your weakness, u/cuckedalt
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/22 02:41 AM
2

What if the reason guys see no problem with cold approaches is because they visualize the best case scenario like this one...while women hate them because they imagine the worst case scenario lol
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/22 02:32 AM
1

She does have an attractive personality
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 09:48 PM
3

Can’t see their ass Breaking down the real issues I see
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 09:36 PM
1

Lol I guess the makeup gives off that impression and it's hard to tell from the pics, but Alexandra's vibe is more goofy and girl next door IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 09:29 PM
1

Going along with the theme of rating female chess players turned Twitch streamers, what do people think of these two on a scale from 1-10: Alexandra Botez Andrea Botez side by side since they're a team and Google confuses the two sometimes
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 09:21 PM
6

How did he demonstrate his willingness to physically protect you before you were together?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 08:04 PM
1

No I'm actually impressed by how well they've managed to make Pokemon look unique and not like real animals. Even the normal ones like Psyduck look extra surprised and cartoony which thankfully doesn't resemble any ducks I've seen in the wild.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 06:55 PM
1

No insult taken, I'm more concerned about how statistics are so easily misused so often by bad actors for their own ideological purposes (men bad, women bad, minorities bad, etc.). Given that and PPD's interesting history with statistics and "interpreting" them you'll have to excuse me if I don't immediately realize people are just being ironic and not totally serious when they start summarizing studies.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 06:42 PM
1

Yeah I was responding to your comment, not the tweet. Seems like you're trying to hint at a conclusion without explicitly stating it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 06:22 PM
1

For this sub that's like using celebrities as a representative of what dating or aging looks like, most people don't live exceptional lives so there's no predictive power in that data for the average individual. The converse is what matters: most men aren't murderers, most Muslims aren't suicide bombers, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 06:09 PM
2

I agree with you, learning to talk to women platonically is fundamental and necessary. You need at least that. It's just not sufficient, that's all I'm saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 05:59 PM
1

Because it was indiscriminate? If it was a misogynistic killing he would have been more careful in only targeting the girls and not ending up killing as many boys as he did. Kind of like the Buffalo shooter and saying "sorry" when he saw that white guy and decided not to pull the trigger.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 05:53 PM
0

If you want to get better at something you focus on the whole process, end game included. Conversational skills are necessary but they're not sufficient.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 05:01 AM
5

In the sense that marriage is a compromise, then sure I would agree. Especially if the frequency is equal to or less than the dating-phase amount. The guy equivalent might be something like, say, to suddenly stop trying and never pick up his socks again after getting married.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 03:20 AM
4

Title of the post: One of the best ways for guys to get better at talking & flirting with women Flirting and escalating sexual tension is an entirely different skill set and experience of leaving your comfort zone than simply making small talk about the weather, the latter of which involves virtually no risk of or affords any practice with learning to anticipate and deal with rejection.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 02:51 AM
1

I wouldn't say his brain doesn't matter at all, but I was more being ironic and taking a page from Chappelle's "how old is [18] really?" bit...in light of recent discussions I've seen surrounding criminal responsibility, legal age, and the context of this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 02:36 AM
1

Legally maybe but his brain isn't fully developed yet so he's basically still a child. Or something like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 02:21 AM
1

People are gonna start walking around in body armor to avoid becoming the next casualty
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 01:58 AM
1

That's true but they both kind of share the element of being part of the same gossip grapevine, so to speak. Even if you're a few degrees removed. And any woman after the first one you try your luck at will probably feel like second choice. Of course not every social group is that dramatic where it's like the worst case scenario every time, but it does seem to be a common phenomenon IME.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/22 12:58 AM
3

but the problem was that he always became attracted to every woman he was friends with This is why I've always thought that the advice to look for love within your social/friend groups isn't really the best idea. Everyone knows each other and everyone talks, so unless you're charming or just lucky, more often than not you can easily develop a reputation for being that guy who hits on all the women (or multiple women or even just one who's gossipy). And that just makes things uncomfortable for th…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/22 11:33 PM
4

Edit: I do find it slightly amusing that every guy here has rated himself as above average. That's funny when you consider that people on the internet often remark about how frustrated guys will over-exaggerate their "ugly" looks as an excuse for their dating troubles. Who knows, maybe the guys saying they're 6's or 7's are actually 5's but maybe they're just confident and basing their rating on past results. With men it's harder to isolate the effect of your looks because your personality gives…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/22 11:15 PM
2

Vinegar chips? yes Better than any other flavor? Allow me to introduce you to sour cream and onion
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/22 09:12 PM
0

Is it really? Also if you're a straight guy then seeing a dude who magically had D cups isn't going to make you question yourself either lol
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/22 06:42 PM
2

Sure but they're not really traits that are unique to women in the same way that having tits is.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/22 06:07 PM
3

It would actually be kind of scary if people were literally incapable of changing their first impression of someone. Too much bias and prejudice in this world for that to be a good thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/22 12:19 PM
9

If this is a tits vs ass thing, then tits being more attractive to men makes more sense since it's a dimorphic feature that's actually unique to women.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/22 12:11 PM
4

I swear some of the women on that show feel like plants... The idea that women on that panel would be enthusiastically okay with a high value man cheating on them because "all men would cheat given the opportunity" and "it's just sex...women's ego is what pisses them off about a desirable man doing it" is the one instance where the gaslighting seems painfully obvious even for their audience lol
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/22 06:19 AM
5

Interesting tidbits: Harasser Different Race - 15.1% fear (anti-misogyny before anti-racism?) In a store - 2.8% fear (surprisingly low) In a public park/garden - 22.2% fear (surprisingly high, not at all what I expected)
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/22 01:22 AM
2

You're right, making your conversation long or drawn-out doesn't do you much good. Easier for them to get bored or just plain forget about you.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/22 12:35 AM
1

I see what you mean, with OLD I never say I find them attractive because it's kind of stating the obvious in that context, plus she can't hear your tone or read body language so it's hard to make it come across as not boring, at least for me. What I will do instead is again to make it more roundabout or I'll try to think of an original pickup line but even those should be used sparingly because to really stand out online even the template of your conversation should be spontaneous IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/22 12:13 AM
1

Yeah I figured as much, still pretty ballsy though
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/22 11:42 PM
1

Yeah personally I would only say something really direct like "I find you really attractive/cute" at the end of an interesting conversation rather than front-loading it so your admiration of her looks doesn't become the focus of your interaction. I usually hint at it in a roundabout way since women are very perceptive, and if things go well then I make it explicit and ask for her number before I leave. Unless it's somehow super relevant to the situation you're in, or you absolutely can't help bu…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/22 11:42 PM
1

Meditation maybe? Realize that everything sensory in this world is fleeting and basically emptiness...
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/22 11:22 PM
1

I wasn’t super into him initially but he was nice. He basically begged to eat me out That's some...impressively steep escalation lol
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/22 11:17 PM
1

It's more about not being cliche than simply not complimenting them. If you comment on an attractive woman's looks you can get away with it by being observant and making it creative and actually applicable to their situation. Like telling her "I'm really digging this Wonder Woman vibe you've got going on" if she looks like Gal Gadot or telling her "you could give Lara Croft a run for her money" at a Halloween party or something lol. Sounds cheesy but honestly sometimes cheesy humor is better tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/22 11:08 PM
6

Exposure and a willingness to put yourself out there and risk discomfort and failure can help develop social skills, sure. But the effects are slow and steady, and having "basic social skills" isn't enough to stand out, it's like being a nice guy. There's also the part about appeal and who you actually are, exposure is just an amplifier. A high exposure environment doesn't change whether you have game or not, it just gives you a bigger audience to witness your game or lack thereof. Just because …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/22 05:17 PM
9

Exposure only gets you laid if you have the social skills and the appeal to capitalize on said exposure. Hanging out with people more successful than you doesn't magically make you more successful through osmosis, you need to put in work.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/22 04:57 PM
2

Yeah that's maybe around 1%, distributed among all ages.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/22 01:04 AM
8

Being drug addicted or mentally ill doesn't necessarily take men out of the dating game. And the number of incarcerated and homeless men is fairly negligible compared to the overall population. You'd need a catastrophic event like a world war to really start feeling the effect numerically.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/22 12:58 AM
4

In a way this is just a variation of slut shaming but in reverse. A healthy "fully formed human" is also a sexual one, you're weirdly oversimplifying women by assuming they have no subconscious or ulterior motives as well. The only difference is that women's sexuality more easily flies under the radar because they can claim innocence by offloading the risk and responsibility of being "creepy" onto the men socially obligated to make the first move. Can't have your cake and eat it too.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/22 06:04 PM
4

"I wasn't a good husband or partner" was him being modest in his description, and his drinking and downward depressive spiral was a product of finding out he was sterile when they wanted kids (big omission there). The wife was far and away the worse partner for cheating and lying to him for 4 years. There was no breach of trust on his part.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 11:35 PM
1

Sometimes I feel extra pressure to do well if I get an interview opportunity thanks to a friend's referral.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 08:42 PM
2

That sounds intuitively correct, but it does raise some questions. Do most people date to make others jealous, or to make themselves happy and find someone "good enough"? Is attractiveness actually directly proportional to height or is there a peak after which being 10 feet tall becomes either unattainable or impractical or unaesthetic? Is attraction about having absolute qualities or relative ones? If attractiveness is about perfect facial/body ratios down to mathematical accuracy then wouldn't…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 08:15 PM
2

Unpopular opinion: if you require alcohol or substance use as a crutch to tell funny stories or do interesting things you couldn't do sober then you're not really that interesting a person naturally.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 04:38 PM
8

What a terrible day to be able to read
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 01:04 AM
1

Generally speaking both countries are heavily male dominated but Korean feminists tend to be more outspoken due to their anti-colonial history. And Korean society itself is more open to civic protest and speaking up, social harmony be damned. Which means the backlash against Korean feminism is also more public and visible. Also Korean women seem to be less constrained by linguistic and cultural roles, while Japanese women are more "pragmatic" about gender equality (either willingly or as a way t…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 12:16 AM
1

Fair point
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 11:56 PM
1

Why are you on Reddit when you're out with people lol
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 11:45 PM
2

Maybe there's a primal fear of extroversion = meeting or approaching other men. Also being soft-spoken is kind of viewed as a feminine quality, as is being thin, having long hair, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 11:41 PM
1

I find it very interesting how Kpop girl groups went with an overall "sexy" image while the Japanese idol industry went with the "cute" image. And how those culturally-specific marketing decisions impacted feminist movements within their respective countries.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 11:37 PM
1

Yeah ultimately I think it depends on your personality. If you thrive on adversity and being the underdog then you might prefer the more successful friend. If you're more prone to envy and get easily discouraged then maybe not so much.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 11:24 PM
1

Really hot girl posts “sexy video” - girls say she’s a “pick me”, slut,whore, stupid, try’s too hard, and point out their minor flaws etc.. When a conventionally unattractive overweight girl posts the same thing - girls say she’s beautiful, hot, sexy, etc.. That's human nature, it's like how people tend to keep friends who are generally in the same ballpark as them looks and success wise. If someone in the group becomes too successful or glows up then it breeds resentment. But if someone stays a…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 11:07 PM
2

The most reasonable and least stressful life philosophy IMO is to prepare for the worst but hope for the best. Work on what you can control and don't overthink about the things you can't. As for the risk-reward of getting married, are you the type of person to regret doing something that turns out badly, or the type to regret not doing something after the opportunity has passed? How well do you deal with loneliness? Your answers to those questions should inform you somewhat on whether this marri…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 07:19 PM
3

Maybe they wanted a clearer indication that you were into them before outright asking for your number, I think even well-adjusted guys are generally more sensitive about not being seen as "creepy" nowadays.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 06:52 PM
2

've never seen a subreddit where mods give users with dissenting opinions stupid fla Lol that's such a petty and passive-aggressive way of trying to editorialize and curate free speech. Of course they're also fond of making more substantial but still passive-aggressive moves like shadowbanning people with dissenting opinions that make them even a tiny bit uncomfortable. FDS did the same thing with pickme flairs pretty shamelessly.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 06:05 PM
-1

I mean "settle" sounds a bit harsh and that whole shaming older women for aging thing can go and die, but in the end age is just a physical preference like any other. Both the preference to be with someone around your own age, or with someone younger or older, are equally valid. Except people pretend the first is a reasonable and practical preference, while the second must be an intentionally immoral choice with no regard to attraction or practicality. That'd be like saying "Yeah imagine dating …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 05:22 PM
15

average people all kinda look the same They don't though? Just because two women have similar build and similar hair doesn't mean they can't possibly look wildly different due to small facial differences.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 12:39 AM
1

Because pressing buttons is considerably easier than getting yourself to the gym and moving weight.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/22 11:21 PM
8

I'm not sure that being financially successful or intelligent or kind are necessary conditions for a guy to get laid, if you're talking about raw physical attraction and casual sex, and not relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/22 11:08 PM
1

I think the exceptions to aging and attractiveness are sizable enough for the idea of "hitting a Wall" at 30 to seem a bit presumptive for both genders. In the case of men, looking babyfaced in your twenties is often a huge detriment dating-wise. And in the case of certain ethnicities like some black or Asian people with softer features they often don't reach their physical peak until their thirties and do get easily mistaken for a younger age. As for the majority of people being physically attr…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/22 10:46 PM
1

Your facial structure absolutely changes past 20.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/22 10:02 PM
1

You can't say cold approaching doesn't benefit either gender when you already admit that it actually does work for a minority of people, men and women. Just like nutritional and fitness advice, dating advice is only ever important and relevant on an individual level (for obvious reasons) so you can't help but account for the exceptions, and any sweeping advice that limits personal choice and says to all men or all women NEVER to do something is both undemocratic in spirit and should be viewed wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/22 08:59 PM
0

The only burden of proof I have is demonstrating that there's a need for these channels, not that there aren't toxic ones or that channels are less toxic than subs (they're equally rife with bad advice). And the need is already self-evident from the massive quantity of posts asking about dating help and complaining about dating troubles on Reddit.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/22 08:22 PM
1

There's no substantive difference between a sub and a channel, you're splitting hairs. Also weird analogy since dating is obviously more complex and involving more variables than learning to wipe your ass or tie your shoes.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/22 07:51 PM
1

Lol why wouldn't there be an exclusive need for it? We have entire subs on the topic. Dating and relationships are an integral part of life just like personal finance that you don't learn formally through school.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/22 07:38 PM
5

If a '1' manages to improve to a '4', he is still inferior to a lazy natural '5'. Even though I largely disagree with blackpill rhetoric, there is some merit in this point dating-wise. Unless you go around showing people photos of your fitness journey, for instance, they only see where you currently stand looks-wise and not how far you've come. And only care about the now from the point of view of sexual attraction. "Potential" is mostly only attractive in theory, that's why guys calling themsel…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/22 08:55 PM
2

Also probably due to changing cultural definitions of "bad" experiences.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/22 07:39 PM
1

Most women who interact with men aren't that alarmist about "all men being evil" because they witness examples of good guys in their lives. It's the ones who get hurt or betrayed and then catastrophize their one experience by retreating into their own cocoons who are susceptible to this kind of all or nothing thinking. And become prime targets for recruitment into FDS type communities.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/22 07:33 PM
1

Something something don't dip your pen in company ink
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/22 07:27 PM
2

FDS ideas aren't anything new or groundbreaking, they've always existed in some form. The only difference is that most normal women are capable of critical thinking and take such dating advice with a trial and error mentality and some healthy skepticism, instead of interpreting theory as gospel.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/22 06:37 PM
7

If ever you had any doubt that cultural trends can influence societal perception of what is attractive and what is not, even in the face of deeply ingrained beauty standards, just remember these 3 letters: BTS.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 05:52 PM
2

Married an older woman because no one his age or younger would have him Lol that's convenient logic, I thought women your age were supposed to be able to tell you aint shit? Do they suddenly lose that ability in their 50s again?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 03:53 AM
2

Where's that chubby chaser guy, we need his opinion stat
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 01:01 AM
2

Ignore the self assured part, that was just an assumption that I shouldn't have added for my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/22 09:28 PM
1

Not everyone dates for marriage or kids would be the answer to the last question.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/22 09:24 PM
2

I think, in that sense, unless Sally is being blatantly abusive, that it is in John's control how he sees what is happening and is able to be happy that way. I see what you mean and that might work to an extent. But then again a lot of marital and relationship dissatisfaction doesn't rise to the level of abuse or gaslighting, but often still things like incompatibility, bad habits, lack of effort or communication that take an emotional toll. In which case I don't think suggesting that happy peop…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/22 07:32 PM
1

Maybe I shouldn't have said self-assured, that's not really synonymous with happy and muddles my point. You can have low self-esteem but still be happy and optimistic for change.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/22 07:11 PM
2

Answering affirmatively to the question isn't a 100% guarantee of a happy long-term relationship. It is just the highest predictor. Yeah I get that it's a correlation, but I just don't see any support for or convincing explanation of a causative impact on relationship happiness mentioned in the article. Just that "it looks like it's this way from the data." And unless I'm missing something obvious, their central conclusion ​ According to my read of the research of Joel and her coauthors...the be…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/22 07:06 PM
1

But how does individual happiness account for relationship happiness when compatibility and the character traits of the other person are both factors you can't control? You could be the most self-assured and positive person in the world, but that won't sustain a happy relationship if your partner is abusive or toxic. Or unhappy.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/22 06:24 PM
–

People make broad assumptions from observing anecdotal trends, this happens in dating discussions all the time. Even with immutable traits and not just bad behavior. Much of PPD is guilty of it. Not to say it's acceptable, but people seem fine with it as long as they're not personally called out in the specific stereotype.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/22 06:06 PM
1

The guy who takes whatever he wants
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 10:03 PM
1

[Pepe Le Pew intensifies]
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 09:56 PM
1

Anything is not that big of a deal when you know you have or have had enough of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 09:38 PM
2

I think there's a difference between implying someone is purposely being unproductive and lazy versus recognizing they're not well-adjusted and in need of help. I didn't sense any moral condemnation in that person's specific comment, but yes: to the extent the problem is a result of a mental disorder or an irrational fear instead of a lack of effort despite being fully capable, ridiculing the person instead of trying to understand them doesn't help.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 08:42 PM
1

Yeah I know
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 07:58 PM
2

30% seems incredibly high. Also I think that data includes 19 year olds who report having no sex partners for a 1 year since turning 18 so that's not really an extended enough time to make any conclusions. And you have guys who are just busy or focused on school and career so they're voluntarily not spending time dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 07:47 PM
1

Speaking of sundresses and redheads I realized I haven't noticed that many tanned redheads before but then again if anyone can pull off the super pale look it's redheaded women so it works out I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 07:33 PM
1

Human :/
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 07:16 PM
2

Literally a crowd of people changing their minds in real time. 3 minutes. From "look at that weird guy dancing" to "I don't wanna look weird for not dancing"
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 07:10 PM
2

They talk about the importance of the first follower as much as the lone nut himself, but this video will never not be relevant on the topic of human social dynamics.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 06:54 PM
1

Yeah I guess that just fundamentally doesn't make sense to me. What better way is there of filtering your dating pool then actually curating the pool you want to filter FROM in the first place? It's like instead of browsing a selection of clothing at your favorite store and choosing the outfit you want to buy, a panel of strangers without your fashion taste comes up with a random assortment from their favorite stores and forces you to choose an outfit from that list. Even if they get it right ac…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 05:37 PM
1

I dunno, I think that's just comforting self talk for people who want to believe they get higher quality signals when they just wait to be approached. Which doesn't reflect reality. Men approach in the vast majority of cases, so it's very unlikely that the many examples of women getting pumped and dumped or suffering in abusive relationships all happened because those women decided to make the first move.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 05:25 PM
1

Was there any indication that she approached him or is that just the assumption because he's not attracted to her? There are many reasons why a guy who's desperate or on a rebound might lower his standards and settle, and still make the first move.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 05:13 PM
1

But for someone to accept below their looksmatch that means the other person is successfully batting out of their league. Which does happen more than people might expect.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 06:28 AM
3

That's interesting, I've heard of the cheating army wives/spouses stereotype, but not cheating soldiers. As to your question it's hard to say, most people don't really have the opportunity to cheat or admit it openly so it's kind of like wondering what percentage of people would leave their spouses if they won the lottery.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 02:35 AM
1

Square ones. Cylindrical chopsticks roll around too easily.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/22 01:17 AM
12

Honestly this obsession with sex to the point where you think it’s a “need” akin to water is pretty pathetic. It's definitely a social and developmental need, like having friends. Or loving parents. You don't physically require any of those for life but you do need them to thrive (quality of life). And in many representations of Maslow's hierarchy it's pretty fundamental next to food and water. Otherwise society wouldn't shame someone's lack of it if not having it weren't viewed as such a red fl…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/22 07:04 PM
1

​ Money being attractive to women means 1) the guy having more money than the woman and 2) the guy standing out among other men in his city for having that amount of money. It's in relative terms, not absolute. (Although at the higher end absolute wealth = relative wealth.) If men and women engineers are both making six figures then a six figure salary isn't impressive. And even to women who aren't engineers or making that much, if 100,000 other men are also making six figures then by comparison…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/22 05:01 PM
2

Are you a father by any chance?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/22 04:29 PM
2

He's gonna be the first in line to get Elon's Neuralink AI surgically implanted into his brain. Imagine one day getting force-fed corporate advertising from inside your own mind unless you paid a subscription, couldn't be me.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/22 05:54 AM
1

I see, didn't know about that incident.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/22 05:42 AM
3

Honestly it's hard to tell who's lying in any given situation unless you really take a close look and examine both sides. Any woman may or may not have a reason to lie, and any successful guy may or may not feel compelled to assault someone he really wanted in the heat of the moment. But yeah the glaring hole in her story was her text convo with the friend and the way she summarized the interaction with Ethan saying "I wouldn't call it assault." I'm just disappointed to realize how bad of a juro…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/22 05:36 AM
1

Also what bothers me is that my bias against Fresh and Fit made me fully believe the girl's account of what happened before watching their livestream afterwards. Based on what was actually a kind of vague retelling in many parts of the story where Myron provided the pertinent details (although tbf she did provide her own text receipts but only part of the conversation). And he was calling her out for "capping" about the details the whole time. Which personally I was kind of giving her the benefi…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/22 05:18 AM
1

I watched both the H3 broadcast and the F&F livestream out of curiosity. It was like a modern-day Rashomon the way that both the girl and Myron tried to make their accounts of what happened as believable as possible. And kind of disturbing how Ethan tried to insinuate that he had sexually assaulted her, looking back in hindsight. Full transparency: I can't stand F&F's podcast and a lot of their views on dating, but the guys laid out their case absolutely methodically with receipts and the girl p…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/22 04:51 AM
1

Lol wut...how did you think of urination before something like, having kids and starting a family? Do you have sex just so you can pee?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/22 08:58 PM
1

Wanting your genitals stimulated... It's not all take and no give during sex. There's a lot of compromise and selfless service involved, if you catch my drift. And the term "genitals" implies another purpose of having sex beyond the physical stimulation. ...and loving someone are two different things Only if you believe it's impossible to express emotion through physical action.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/22 06:56 PM
1

Kendrick restoring my trust in the idea that a longer wait time = a superior product.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/22 06:23 PM
2

I don't think the already too-high-for-comfort divorce rates among even same-age couples have really disincentivized committed people who want to get married from getting married either. By analogy, acceptance rates at the most competitive universities have dipped below 10% already. That hasn't stopped enterprising students from applying to Harvard and Stanford, nor should it really. Otherwise how much do you deserve your dream if you're gonna be so easily deterred by low odds? If the numbers fo…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/22 06:15 PM
3

Controversial opinion but honestly that's what the whole "big age gaps are always bad because statistics" debate looks like from a more rational onlooker's POV. "But I'm only protecting other women from toxic black/older men! Fuck being politically correct, our safety is more important than their feelings!" In that regard some FDSers are actually noteworthy for being consistent, although also blatantly racist in doing so lol
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/22 06:03 PM
1

Do you think sex means the exact same thing regardless of who you do it with and under what circumstance you're doing it in? Wanting sex in a committed relationship doesn't mean you can't possibly feel love through sex, or that you don't also express love in non-sexual ways. You're oversimplifying things.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/22 05:41 PM
1

That statement isn't really self-contradictory though, I think most people realize there's an emotional difference between a drunken hookup and sex with a partner you've been with for years. It's more the accuracy of "men communicating love through sex" as even a broad generalization that I would disagree with.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/22 05:09 PM
4

How sure are you that it's the same people thinking all these conflicting things? I don't agree with any of those points in their entirety.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/22 04:53 PM
1

I see, that makes sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 08:54 PM
2

Achieving a <1% success rate at an athletic 6'2" seems incredibly demotivating if that was your intention lol Unless I'm misunderstanding you also mentioned you scored once every 3-5 women you approached while in shape, which is a 20+% success rate. So for your lifetime average to be less than 1% that suggests most of your experiences occurred while you were not at your physical peak?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 08:04 PM
2

What's the point of doing wild shit in your childhood and adolescence and having crazy stories to tell? It's part of enjoying life while you still can.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 08:00 PM
3

Lol that's some All Lives Matter reasoning
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 07:51 PM
2

Damn who is this mysterious guy named "Men" who goes around doing all these things? Dude sounds like a hypocrite.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 07:25 PM
5

You did suggest that it being a bigger disadvantage for men wasn't true because of the survey you linked. And OP didn't imply it was unique to men.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 07:12 PM
2

Regardless the original point is that being introverted is generally more difficult for men because their expected role in dating is proactive and not reactive or passive. Which the survey data doesn't contradict.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 07:03 PM
4

That says nothing about whether the women are voluntarily eschewing sex or not. When you remember that men are culturally expected to make the first move and that shyness is considered a more negative trait in men by women and other men, then it becomes abundantly clear how an introverted woman might be given opportunities in dating that a similarly introverted man might be too hesitant to chase for himself out of necessity.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 06:56 PM
1

Yep it sure is, which is why the whole idea of designating right and wrong places to meet people always seemed like wishful thinking to me. Once you lay out the obvious ground rules (don't trap them or follow them around, don't make them say no more than once) everything after that basically comes down to personal preference and situational context and maybe some luck.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 05:51 PM
1

If you meet someone at a college party even and you don't have any friends in common, then your social networks don't "overlap" in any meaningful or direct way where vetting the other person through word-of-mouth or a friend's reference would even be an option. It's just a placebo effect of thinking everyone in that kind of environment is probably an okay person. Which as we know is a dangerous assumption, since stuff like sexual assault happens in seemingly pre-approved environments as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 05:38 PM
5

The point is that people who are over-educated and spend most of their time in safe academic environments might not be mentally conditioned to take risks and break rules outside of the classroom. Grossly generalizing, but the kind of people who do rebellious, interesting things are probably the ones who didn't think twice about skipping school to do those things so that now they have an interesting story to tell at the party.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 05:12 PM
0

Being an interesting and appealing enough person to date isn't guaranteed just by following a social script and saying the right words. Meeting people successfully involves being funny, being a great storyteller, being confident, pursuing and experiencing fun things, etc. None of those traits can be "reasoned" or "solved" because attraction and perception aren't logical.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 05:08 PM
2

Doctors and engineers party. College students who are studying to be doctors and engineers? Now that's a different story altogether lol
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 05:03 PM
1

That's what I meant, if that woman had met the exact same guy for the first time at a grocery store. And she was feeling good that day, and not in a rush, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 05:02 AM
1

Are you suggesting that if that woman met an interesting and fun guy she was attracted to at a party, then there's absolutely no circumstance where she might find herself in a conversation and conceivably be open to talking with that same guy had they met at a grocery store instead? I'll grant you it's less likely, but it's not like women are robots programmed to only be horny or open to romance in a specific pre-approved list of environments.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 04:29 AM
2

And how do you confirm interest without actually asking the person? At best you can act on a strong suspicion based on how they interact with you and nonverbals, but even then it's still not a certainty. Also even with complete certainty that still doesn't address the potential bad breakup situation either.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 03:05 AM
1

Some people actually prefer to see a person's spectrum of emotional/behavioral states before getting serious with them So you think there are people who are actually eager to date someone after they've already had a platonic preview of all their worst personality traits and bad habits? I guess if that person was so appealing that their "worst" was most people's best, then sure. Otherwise I honestly can't see that being a very common opinion. Usually the best time to ask someone out is to quit wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 07:53 PM
2

The long-term exposure works both ways though. If you're a guy that means you can make up for a bad impression, BUT it also means you have to be consistently cool and funny (past your "best moment," as in your "honeymoon stage" without being in an actual relationship) or she will likely lose interest. It's a lot easier to impress a woman for a few hours than it is for a few months or years, so from a pickup perspective it makes more sense efficiency-wise. Plus in a club if you mess up there's al…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 07:17 PM
1

You can join a class instead of an enthusiast group, it's the same idea just with a lower average skill level where you can shine easier if that's your concern instead of having fun.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 07:08 PM
2

The tradeoff is that the proximity makes things more awkward in the event of a rejection or a bad breakup. Also you can easily develop a reputation for being "that guy" because word travels. In terms of giving the woman an exit strategy from a bad situation, approaching and dating people in social circles you value and wouldn't abandon easily is only about one step above dating coworkers. The fact that everyone is familiar is both a pro and a con in a dating context.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 07:02 PM
2

Depends on the thing. It's easier to enjoy being bad at playing an instrument, for example, than being bad at singing or dancing. For most people the latter is more embarrassing when done in public.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 06:42 PM
2

or at least enjoys it and looks like he's having fun
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 06:35 PM
2

If Bob is good at playing piano or at least enjoys it and looks like he's having fun then he'll make friends. People gravitate towards other people who are competent or have the confidence of someone who would be competent in that environment.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/22 06:20 PM
2

It's hard to know someone's struggles by just looking at them, people don't publicize their flaws. But when you're talking about politicians and public figures there's a lot of self-selection already happening. People who are more persuasive and outgoing will likely go into those fields and have less trouble with social relationships than more reserved types. But like I said that's still an assumption on my part, I'm sure there are people in those professions who have the same problems as we see…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 08:26 PM
4

What makes you think politicians and professionals didn't worry about this stuff (like a lot of people do) when they were young and dating? "They marry" is doing a lot of the legwork in that statement lol
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 08:19 PM
1

Yeah I think the environment you're basing your observations on might not be an entirely random sample. Anything from city size to the industry you're working in can attract a more specific demographic of people. You'd have to choose a really statistically random environment like an airport or some other location that everyone is equally likely to visit.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 08:11 PM
2

This can be generalized to: anyone, regardless of political leaning, who feels competitive pressure in dating is more likely to become conservative with regard to their acceptance of certain dating preferences that they secretly like but don't want their competition to crowd them out of. That's how you explain progressive minorities on Twitter being vocally against mixed-race couples, for instance.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 08:01 PM
1

What's confusing about it? If you can't help who you're attracted to then only finding a handful of women (or men) attractive becomes a problem in dating. It's natural to get frustrated about things that are out of your control.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 07:49 PM
3

I wish I could un-google mpreg
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 01:28 AM
2

Lol yeah rare medical issues that receive a lot of attention are probably the better example. Also politically hot topics like trans issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 01:10 AM
1

Big age gaps, apparently.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/22 01:01 AM
3

Self-improvement for men 101 1. work out 2. work on your social skills 3. immunize yourself to rejection and embarrassment (very difficult) If you can do even the first two you'll be in a solid position to play the dating numbers game with better odds
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 09:21 PM
5

Don't wait to get yourself in perfect order before dating, now is the best time to take risks and learn from failure and learn how to fail. Doing anything in life involves practice and self-improvement at the same time, don't let perfect become the enemy of good.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 05:43 PM
1

My point is if they've ever been surprised at your answer then it would suggest you can't always tell if someone is depressed from how they act or look. A lot of famous comedians live with depression but it's not something you'd "expect" from them because of their job and because they're always wearing a smile.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 11:40 PM
2

Have your friends ever asked you if you're depressed?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 11:09 PM
1

lmao that replay
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 09:39 PM
3

Haha yes I've also heard the same from barbers
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 08:59 PM
2

That's a really interesting point. They say hair is more important for women (which is true in many ways) but men's hair seems to make a bigger impact within a smaller range of variation. Even like shaving your hair half an inch from its current length can make a drastic impact on how you look to a mind-boggling degree. Your description of "computer geek to bad boy" transformation in minutes is spot on.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 08:51 PM
5

Not at all, the kpop audience is primarily teens to early/mid 20's age-wise, so Gen Z pretty much. (Although it is ethnically and geographically diverse.) Which makes sense, that's about what you would expect the audience to be for similar boy bands like One Direction and other groups marketed for Western audiences.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 08:38 PM
1

Sure, if you're a masculine man
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 06:18 PM
2

It's still not the majority of women though, but it is a noticeable minority.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 05:35 PM
4

If you fit a certain archetype (thin, pretty white/Asian guy) then you'll probably be attractive to a subset of women, usually very young women in certain fan circles. People have already mentioned Timothee Chalamet, but with the massive popularity of Kpop that phenomenon has been gradually transcending racial barriers as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 05:31 PM
1

I see. If it helps you feel better that awkward feeling is not an uncommon one. Also people nowadays have the option of looking down at their phones instead of randomly inspecting the furniture so that's a plus too.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 02:31 AM
1

So do you feel awkward making conversation with people in a group that you don't know? Like is it worse in a setting where everyone starts out on equal footing as strangers and there's no cliques? Or is it worse when someone accompanies you there because of the unexpected drop-off from "I can relax, my friend next to me is carrying the conversation" to "oh shit my friend just left and it's up to me to make noise with these people I've been neglecting to talk to" that makes things weird?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 02:08 AM
1

I mean hey, they have athletes at Yale too! Speaking of Hollywood depictions of real life though, I'm sure there was also a period of time where Animal House got a lot of otherwise normal college students feeling really insecure that their 4-year experience wasn't measuring up to the frat boy "standard."
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 08:32 PM
2

Again it's situational and depends a lot on what you're studying and the school environment. If you're an English major at Big State U then you'll likely have an easier schedule and more free time to not worry about midterms and think about hooking up instead.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 07:14 PM
2

I mean dating does take time and effort, unless you're just looking for casual hookups (even then it's not a given). You don't just start the stopwatch when your clothes are already on the floor. I'm not saying it's necessarily healthy to over-focus on school while you're in school, but being too busy or stressed to date doesn't make you socially abnormal.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 06:59 PM
2

I'm more talking about the parent's POV. But even so it's also very dependent on your cultural background and your focus. If you're a STEM major from an immigrant family then you're probably going to have a lot of pressure and very little time to be chasing (or thinking about chasing) girls outside of class. Especially if you're lower SES and have to work a part-time job to help pay tuition.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 06:42 PM
3

You're gonna get a lot of selection bias with this question lol I don't think many parents are even considering the idea of their kid spending their money having unprotected sex instead of studying for class.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 06:27 PM
1

Most guys can't pull off long hair for different reasons, just like most women can't pull off having super short hair.. You gotta have the right facial shape and hair quality (and personality, I'd say) to not come across like a scraggly homeless dude.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 06:19 PM
1

It's not "only" but it's "more likely" and "much more easily." People tend to be more friendly and accommodating towards attractive people, give them more leeway and benefit of the doubt to stumble socially knowing little about them, find excuses to talk to them, offer them work and social access opportunities, etc. I don't think pretty privilege is really that controversial or surprising a concept.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 05:23 PM
1

Not being social will hurt your chances, but being social isn't necessarily enough to help your chances. It's a neutral, baseline expectation, like being nice. Everyone is expected to be socially competent in a group, but you have to actually be interesting or funny to stand out (if you're not attractive). Just hanging out with people, contributing your "safe" opinions to the conversation, and showing up in group photos isn't enough to do that.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 05:01 PM
1

There are better arguments for the male "wall" but this isn't it. The "wall" is an aesthetic statement about your looks, so having a limp dick at 40 is about as relevant as having a small dick at 20 (or a limp dick at 20, poor guy). In both cases it's literally "doesn't matter; had sex," which pretty much means you've already scaled the wall.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 03:52 AM
3

Yeah aside from the intangible metrics being a big factor there's also the cultural and racial complications to dating that often get overlooked behind the anonymity and assumptions of online discussion. And those factors often influence each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 10:24 PM
2

That's effectively true, the only "average" that matters is the guys you're competing with in the environment you're looking for a partner. However that's also true when people discount the experiences of guys who struggle with dating by telling them to stop whining because "the average guy I know has no problems." They're reverting back to a different definition of average that might not explain why that particular guy is having trouble compared to his immediate peers.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 09:59 PM
1

Men are shamed for rejecting women and preferring other women for various reasons but chin hair is generally not one of them (outside of the more extreme feminist positions). People tend to shame based on factors that they can't control or personally feel threatened by. Chin hair is relatively easy to manage.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 05:46 PM
2

Yeah it's one thing to recognize valid concerns for your own sake or someone you care about, it's another to generalize completely about a group of people you personally don't know in not just practical terms but moral terms as well. In the end the risk is up to the individual himself or herself to decide whether it's worth pursuing. That's how I see personal freedom.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 04:18 AM
5

You can't really ensure equality of outcome without taking away personal freedom, so that's a no-go. The next best thing would be to strive towards equality of opportunity by upholding the conditions for people to exercise their personal freedom (their dating preferences). As a society that would mean a collective effort to not shame people for their dating choices and artificially limiting their options. So no shaming guys for dating single mothers or younger women, no slut-shaming women for en…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 04:03 AM
3

Did someone say "variability hypothesis"? I'm not sure I totally agree but it does make sense if you believe that generally women are valued by how they look and men are valued by what they have. It also seems fair in a cosmic justice kind of way: since women's attractiveness is more captive to the genetic dice roll then they should have an easier time getting attention from men. Whereas men have the potential to accumulate wealth or other personality traits to compensate for their looks so the …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 03:32 AM
9

You're also assuming autistic women prefer autistic men and not socially normal men. Obviously one should still try, but their potential dating pool is going to be limited even by other women who share the condition.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 03:25 AM
3

I don't fault her for being turned off by the guy's extreme shyness, that's neither a desirable trait nor a healthy one to put up with. (In fact I'm surprised that he found another woman before OP who was willing to look past that.) But I do agree she was being an asshole for assuming he was being dishonest with his anxiety or even trying to weaponize it in a misogynistic way. As for the guy I'd call his situation more pitiful than being an asshole, although it's hard to say with full certainty …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 03:02 AM
3

People don't usually try to change their lives when they're doing well. So you'd need an incentive stronger than sex to incentivize them, or you just wait until their success dries out somehow.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/22 09:59 PM
1

You're right it varies, but I feel like we often downplay the effect someone's face has on their body. If you were given the choice to ONLY see a picture of someone's face vs ONLY a picture of their body in order to sate your curiosity of what they looked like then I'm sure most people would choose the face (even in a dating context and not just a generic one). Obviously some people would prefer a hot body in considering the total package but I think the face just gives you more information abou…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/22 09:22 PM
1

I thought people weight the face heavier though, since a pretty face is more unique and because it's usually harder to change your face than your body. Also there's no term for the opposite of "butterface" nor is that very common IME.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/22 08:51 PM
2

That's a great question, from what I've observed that's generally been the case. In part because women are attracted to status and competency, and in part because people in general like partners who can teach them new things or stimulate them intellectually in ways they're not familiar with. Even if the guy compensates for being skilled in some other area she knows nothing about it's possible that he's already lost that "magic" and the layman's benefit of the doubt in her eyes. It's like when yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/22 08:33 PM
1

You can struggle in dating as an average (or "normal") guy if you don't meet anyone who fits your standards either looks, personality, or interest-wise. Or don't have the time to meet people. Simple as that. Lack of success is a two-way street in terms of compatibility, and effort is only part of the equation. Sure anyone can probably find A date or A partner, but how meaningful is dating success if you end up settling or compromising out of fear of being alone? (Also people will often under-rat…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/22 07:57 PM
1

I'm guessing because feminists are mostly liberal and liberals tend not to like guns. However feminists also value female safety and guns are the only thing that equalize men and women. So it's an interesting moral dilemma.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/22 07:16 PM
2

It feels great in the short-term but depressing as an idea because being valued for your fading looks isn't that much more "liking you for you" than being valued for your money. It's more of a gateway to showcasing your personality in the hopes of hooking the other person long term.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/22 07:06 PM
5

If they had crushing self-esteem issues they'd go for the awful 5'5" guy rather than the awful 6' guy lol The women you're talking about only have mild self-esteem issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/22 05:53 AM
2

So back to your original point again, which you still haven't demonstrated has anything to do with mutual attraction. Or explained why it's wrong generally speaking to hit on someone who is also single because they're "unlikely" (your opinion) to be attracted to you back. You're trying to conflate practicality and probability with morality.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 08:02 PM
1

Lol then I guess it's up to strangers to decide who's in your "lane" looks-wise, age-wise, etc. Also you're still side-stepping the argument, because "appropriate context" in this discussion means an unmarried, unpartnered single man.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 07:54 PM
1

I'm not saying that being sexually explicit with servers and other people who are trapped with you isn't a dick move, that wasn't my focus. I'm pointing out that "reason and logic" isn't a good excuse to do or not do something with an uncertain outcome like hitting on women, because you're implying two things: - that it would be okay for a 20 year old hot male customer to be overtly sexual and lecherous with the same server because it would be "reasonable and logical" for her to reciprocate his …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 07:05 PM
2

Lol 30 isn't that far from middle aged, not to mention if that guy were 30 himself he'd be the lecherous "old man" hitting on a 19 year old in your scenario . Also attraction has very little to do with reason and logic to begin with, if a 5 or even a 10 year age gap is conceivable then anything larger is just a difference in likelihood and doesn't require too much suspension of disbelief. Otherwise anyone LGBTQ should all just give up because according to "reason and logic" the probability of th…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 06:32 PM
2

Not directly, but ambition is an attractive quality in men. And wealth is very often a mark of ambition.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 05:03 AM
3

When you start getting your breaking news from PPD that's when you know you spend too much time on PPD.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 02:36 AM
2

Biden's probably breathing a sigh of relief that Roe v. Wade is gonna steal the spotlight from the student loan issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 02:35 AM
2

Knowing different languages, hell even putting in a decent effort to learn a language badly, definitely helps your opportunities in dating and in life generally. Even if you're not fluent you open up opportunities to talk to more people about learning the language. At worst you get to embarrass yourself in an endearing way, because people love knowing that someone else thinks their language is cool enough to learn. I don't speak Portuguese by any means, but apparently I "know" enough words from …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 10:43 PM
3

There's a solution for soaring housing prices but it would involve the undesirable trade-off of fundamentally revamping zoning laws and rethinking real estate as a depreciating asset rather than an investment. Although I'm pretty sure some people struggling to buy homes right now wouldn't mind their homes losing value year after year if it would mean having a home to live in. At least initially.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 10:04 PM
2

Maybe they're not trying to be any sort of pill, but it's very hard to talk about ramuses and jaw angles without sounding incel-level obsessed with physical perfection.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 09:53 PM
3

Yeah looks aren't the entirety of attractiveness but they are a huge part of it, especially because first impressions are absolutely critical. I think a lot of red pill frustration comes from the fact that you can't really change your looks, so pretty privilege becomes an easy scapegoat for criticism. Also the culture still reacts very negatively and suspiciously towards looks-mismatched couples for some reason. That said I don't think there's any benefit dating-wise in either extreme of downpla…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 08:04 PM
2

Oh yeah, you don't have to tell me that the ratings system is only relevant between the individuals directly involved. In fact with regard to confidence I take it a step further and say that your "number" is as much your own rating of yourself as someone else's of you.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 07:55 PM
7

Lol I'm confused are you trolling by being evasive or are you trying to make a point? If your buddies actually look like Kpop stars then you're not really disproving anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 07:29 PM
5

Then that would mean attractiveness fluctuates in real-time on a regular basis. If you had a bad day on Monday and got rejected by a 5 in your depression then you were a 5 that day. If you woke up feeling confident and landed an 8 on Friday then you were an 8 that day.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 07:25 PM
6

All my bros consistently land dates without even doing any work. They just get approached by women every now and then. You're gonna have to be more specific, if anything the "not doing work" part comes across as lending credence to the simplistic "just follow rules 1 and 2" mindset that a lot of disillusioned guys subscribe to. Even if your bros aren't the physically attractive type it's still a very anecdotal observation about a particular group of guys getting lucky and being approached first …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 07:18 PM
1

How did you get from "approaching women in public" to "loner with no social circle or social life"? That assumption doesn't make any sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 06:24 PM
2

That's true, the female to male earnings ratio has been gradually increasing year on year, although it's still at around 80% when not controlled for other factors. Maybe that's the "good enough" threshold for a woman to start focusing on looks. I doubt this is primarily an American phenomenon though, most women in other industrialized countries are benefiting from rising incomes and taking influence from American politics and culture.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 10:14 PM
2

Curious why you think it's specifically a millennial problem. Do you think women's standards in real life have been artificially raised because they're willing to compromise on personality in exchange for looks on OLD?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 09:49 PM
4

To be fair women tend to have the option of not needing to initiate. Most men do it out of necessity, not because they particularly enjoy the process.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 09:38 PM
2

Generally nope, it's not unreasonable for a woman to be more afraid of being approached. But that still doesn't mean the man has some sort of moral responsibility to "prove" that he's harmless, assuming he's polite and follows common sense time and place restrictions.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 09:27 PM
–

It's kind of surreal following along these random threads on faith with this constructed image of "generic PPD hot girl" in my mind without actually knowing what you look like.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 09:24 PM
2

I know those two situations can be perceived differently by the other party, my point is that the fear of rejection (or causing "harm," as OP put it) is not unique to either one. At worst it's a difference of intensity, which you can work on mitigating through repeated exposure, among other things.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 07:24 PM
2

The fear of rejection is common to both making friends and flirting with women.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 07:18 PM
1

Anya Taylor-Joy and gritty period dramas: name a better duo
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 05:16 AM
5

Got it backwards. Anxiety doesn't cause the issues, its a rational response to expected stimuli. From a bird's eye view, maybe. But not everyone is the same or has the same threshold for discomfort, so on a per-interaction level it's actually an irrational anticipation of a hypothetical outcome. Being afraid of making others uncomfortable before it happens is hypothetical by definition, because unless you're screaming obscenities or physically stalking people, being subjectively "creepy" can't p…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 05:01 AM
0

If you've seen absolutely no improvement in the level of worry you experience all this time then you should consider exposure therapy if you haven't already. Unless there's some chemical imbalance that can be addressed by exercise or supplementation or medication, it's very uncommon that forcing yourself to do something you fear on a regular basis doesn't at least result in a lessening of the anxiety response towards that thing over time.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 03:53 AM
18

That would be like giving up on making friends because you're afraid not everyone will like you as a person or the idea of hanging out with you. Since we can't control how others perceive us then there's no point in constantly worrying about making others feel uncomfortable or bored when they're around us. That's just mentally exhausting and needlessly damaging for your self-esteem. As long as you take care of the things you can actually control about yourself, and as long as you know you're not…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 02:16 AM
1

Like, imagine you're a 9 from Nowheresville trying to get on instagram. You're up against, like, half the girls in downtown Los Angeles. If you're really that hot then you can also capitalize on it by moving to LA and getting noticed by a talent/model scout. Yeah it's not a guarantee but you still have more potential to "succeed" (get noticed by rich guy) than a 5. ​ No, that's the whole point. millionaires and hot guys have standards other than looks, because looks are easy to get. The original…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 08:37 PM
1

Eh, but you can find natural 9s and 10s pretty much anywhere in the country who will ever even meet a millionaire. Maybe so but a 9 would have the potential to make themselves visible to millionaires if they wanted to. They can market themselves on Instagram, or slide into a rich guy's DMs, or frequent a high-end club by virtue of being hot, etc. Social media in general has made it a lot easier to showcase and spotlight "high-end supply" and then match that supply with demand. And the millionair…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 08:18 PM
1

Reminds me of that girl with the ribbon around her neck horror story
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 07:54 PM
2

I would argue there isn’t as much advantage to being an attractive women vs not as attractive as long as guys are still willing to sleep with you. When you're a (really) attractive woman the guys who are willing to sleep with you also include the ones with net worth in the millions. I'd say that's a significant material advantage.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 07:14 PM
2

I feel like we have a certain amount of embarrassment/shame for a reason and by teaching ourselves to disregard that entirely we're teaching ourselves how to be socially inept weirdos at best and just not care that we are. The way I see it, the point of doing wacky things with the Rejection Challenge isn't to teach you to be a socially inept weirdo by your own volition, it's to teach you to not care about having committed a socially weird behavior accidentally. It's to train your mind so that yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 07:20 AM
1

That only works if you're able to mock it effectively. FDS had the advantage of periodic front-page exposure while restricting the ability of outside critics to join their sub and respond directly to the comments and posts they wished to criticize. Which is undemocratic IMO, any sub that benefits from the "public square" in terms of readership and exposure should not be allowed to shadowban users for their opinions or censor valid criticism within that sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 02:09 AM
4

So you'd be more okay if a guy left you in your 40s than in your 20s? If you say so...
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 01:58 AM
2

If you want to argue about interracial marriages being immoral OK it seems like you're completely incapable of understanding my point, even the Cliffs Notes version. It's an ANALOGY, I'm saying neither age gaps nor interracial marriages are immoral just because you can point to statistics that "seem" to indicate otherwise. If you weren't making a moral point Significant age gap relationships are statistical failures. They're not successful and people think negatively of them for a reason. then i…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 01:49 AM
2

Why are you even on a debate sub if your only motivation to hit "reply" is to say I'm wrong without explaining how? Am I confused or are you having trouble understanding my points? Statistics can be misinterpreted and misused for making moral claims by people with bad or selfish motivations X% of a group being bad does not justify profiling or stereotyping every individual from that entire group based on their innate characteristics like race, age, etc. Is that easier to understand?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 01:39 AM
2

But you realize the guy your age is also getting older alongside you right? What assurance do you have that he won't leave you for a twenty something woman once his age starts with a 3 or 4, if we're going to base your theory on assumptions?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 01:31 AM
2

I never made a claim regarding my personal opinions on marriage let alone marriages with race, class, culture, or religious differences. You implied that people think of age gaps negatively "for a reason" and mentioned them being statistical failures. Clearly you were trying to make the point that lack of statistical success implies it being immoral, and that the negative judgment is justified. The racial statistics I brought up were meant as a stark analogy to highlight how people use statistic…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 01:28 AM
0

Why would it matter that you get your youth and beauty back if women stay looking beautiful past their 30s and the wall is just a fantasy? Unless you're suggesting that a woman's time (and therefore her value) somehow diminishes with every additional year.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 01:12 AM
1

? I quoted the exact thing I addressed in your comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 01:09 AM
0

I guess that counts as an own if you assume that age-gap proponents all interpret statistics with doomsday literalism and somehow all feel the same way about statistics that make women look bad. They're generally useless for basing your life choices on, even more so for making moral claims. That said I don't think the average guy would be well-served by worrying about probabilities and ratios, not only is it needlessly de-motivating but the low odds in dating are very simple to overcome anyways …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 01:08 AM
1

Significant age gap relationships are statistical failures. Lol I guess statistics only matter when the conclusions they draw are compatible with one's political narrative. The "statistical failure" here is a practical issue, not a moral one. To use an analogy, black husband/white wife interracial marriages are 62% more likely to divorce than the baseline white man/white woman marital couple, but it would be nonsensical and quite prejudicial to claim they're bad from a moral point of view. Hell,…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 12:53 AM
8

By that logic no woman should date even men her age, because we all know men in same-age couples are also capable of cheating on and dumping their same-age gfs for other women. Why risk anything in life then if you're afraid of failure?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/22 12:44 AM
4

Wouldn't that logic work both ways? Otherwise a lot of normies are telling on themselves by throwing around the word "incel."
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 05:48 AM
0

Is this what lawyers do for fun in their free time?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 05:36 AM
1

I've told you twice already the sub is physically inaccessible. I don't run the site so I can't pull any links out of thin air.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 05:16 AM
1

I'm talking about FDS women who are doing it anonymously, I doubt your peers would be as willing to flout their professional ethics in front of you in real life. And again the sub is private so I can't find or link anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 05:10 AM
1

It has to do with a lawyer making a topical remark about male clients who have exhibited LVM traits. Or a doctor commenting on the poor habits of male patients.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 05:00 AM
3

If the sub weren't locked and if Reddit search weren't so terrible then I might actually be able to find some examples for you. But you see it in those posts about "what careers of men not to date," and also just generally in rant posts where the topic (aging, marital issues) will inevitably remind someone to recount a story of LVMs that they've encountered in their professional life.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 04:26 AM
3

TRY GETTING A RESERVATION AT DORSIA NOW YOU FUCKING STUPID BASTARD!!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 01:34 AM
1

First
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 01:01 AM
11

I've seen women on FDS who purported to be high-powered doctors and lawyers complaining about the LVM patients and clients that they interacted with on the job to make a point, so it's not unimaginable that some male doctors might do the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 12:56 AM
30

Lol people in the medical field gripe and talk shit about their patients constantly, they're only human. And I doubt they would hold back on an anonymous online forum either.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/22 12:45 AM
1

However, it was the VERY first place I learned about radical feminism from women only in a way that's critical of male porn use, unapologetic about female boundaries Yeah like I mentioned I'm pretty sure you can find communities where people who all agree with each other on certain topics will passionately discuss those topics. But most likely those will be separate communities, not all-in-one like FDS tried to be. So you gotta pick and choose the good stuff and discard the rest. It's very hard …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/22 09:22 PM
2

FDS isn't anything groundbreaking or new, there were and are plenty of online communities that cover all the more "marketable" points you mentioned without the toxicity and bad-faith arguments that came with the sub (which you didn't mention). The only reason FDS gained popularity and became something seemingly more cohesive was because of their actually radical, shit takes that their supporters always leave out from the elevator pitch. I mean, we're talking unironically racist takes that they s…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/22 09:01 PM
3

IME the "feelings vs. facts" thing has been more about ideological leaning than gender. I would never recommend it for sanity's sake but you notice that divide very often if you observe political debates online. Even in dating discussions you get a lot of the bad faith argumentation from the male progressive types trying to virtue signal on controversial topics. But yeah there are a few PPD women who are...quite notorious for that kind of behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/22 08:20 PM
5

Lol yeah sometimes depending on the topic if you put too much effort in arguing then you must be "personally invested" and "overly defensive about nothing." But if you don't respond then they'll think your silence means they won the debate, instead of you just realizing that putting up with their ad hom attacks and strawmen wasn't worth the energy.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/22 08:12 PM
6

Low self-esteem and possibly mental health issues coupled with a lack of positive feedback from the opposite sex? Also short-sightedness? When you're already failing in your twenties it's hard to keep your chin up because no one realistically expects to get less ugly as they age.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/22 10:18 AM
1

Multiply the assumptions about tenfold and that "reasoning" process you described is basically all age gap shaming to a tee. Hell with age gaps you don't even need a BAD anecdote, just their ages and a presumption of unreliable/impressionable narrator.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/22 10:03 AM
1

Looks interesting, like a social skills bootcamp of sorts? Especially the part about getting detailed feedback from your peers. That alone would almost be worth the investment since you rarely get that honest information in real life from complete strangers who have no incentive to sugarcoat things but would feel too awkward to tell you themselves. Assuming this course is as advertised, I think most people anywhere would benefit from this kind of training to some degree, even if you do well soci…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/22 02:11 AM
1

I'm not saying that's how women should act, I'm saying that how people generally think. I don't doubt there are exceptions, since we're all individuals with our own habits and preferences. It's just that exceptions don't really address patterns and trends of what's typically the norm, so when they do happen it can be surprising or at the very least interesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/22 10:46 PM
2

According to human nature? Generally the less time you know someone the more you're going to base your evaluation of them on looks and first impressions. Fairly uncontroversial opinion. If you're going to roll the dice and go home with a guy you just met at a bar, then it makes sense that him being attractive will more likely tip the risk-reward scale in his favor and make the gamble seem worth it to you, compared to an unattractive guy you equally barely know. Whereas with a guy who you might n…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/22 10:21 PM
1

Yeah I think the pandemic aged a lot of people very quickly.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/22 08:27 PM
-1

Lol ok fair enough, I didn't consider the alcohol part. But normally women are more willing to take a chance with a hot guy you barely know vs an ugly guy you barely know. Cost-benefit and all. So maybe "looksmatching" doesn't apply as much if drinks are involved? I figured that was more of a cliche than what commonly happens in real life. If I’m going to be in a relationship with someone, I want a face I can enjoy looking at every day. That makes sense, but usually that's explained by their per…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/22 07:51 PM
0

So your threshold for physical attractiveness is lower for casual sex than relationships? That's very interesting, usually it's the other way around. I'm curious what your reasoning is, specifically what benefit (or motivation even) you see in having casual sex with an unattractive man.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/22 07:36 PM
-1

Also: "If he has a heavily curated and filtered social media presence then he can't possibly be a serial killer."
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/22 05:54 PM
1

If most men have subpar social skills then how are the majority getting dates and relationships?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/22 05:44 AM
18

Of course that interest could be based on desperation, or a lack of options, so you can't rely solely on it Or an abundance of options. The irony is that if the guy has plenty of options on rotation then making him wait does nothing to gauge for interest. He won't feel that time at all because he can easily distract himself by sleeping with other women during your however long probationary period.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/22 07:54 PM
1

I agree but keep in mind you're also saying that with the benefit of hindsight and instant comparison. Usually when people meet in real life they only care that they're attractive enough for them in the moment. When I meet an attractive woman who I vibe with for example I don't imagine a hotter version of her in her early/mid twenties and think to myself "dang that sucks she's really hot now but she would have been way hotter years ago, guess I need to keep searching."
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/22 06:11 PM
3

Or they don't approach because it's considered inappropriate to approach you in that environment. And people have different opinions about what environments are acceptable. Just because a guy doesn't approach you at the grocery store or at work doesn't mean he's not a catch, don't mistake consideration for lack of confidence.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/22 05:14 PM
2

Roastme works too and it's more specific because people on there are incentivized to be brutally honest. If you're not hot then people will tell you exactly what part of your face is weird-looking or ugly. If you are then you'll just get a lot of recycled daddy issue comments.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/22 05:09 PM
6

"Also Toyotas used to be Ferraris too so they have the experience to see through their BS."
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/22 01:26 AM
6

"Not getting pumped and dumped" and "avoiding uninterested men" are two concerns that are independent of each other. For your claim to make sense you'd also have to assume that guys who don't approach somehow aren't interested, which would also imply that the vast majority of relationships where women waited for the guy to approach them somehow demonstrate that those women weren't legitimately interested enough in their man to have made the first move when they met.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/22 11:05 PM
14

No but consider the opposite argument, you think fuckboys are passively waiting around for women to approach them? Guys who pump and dump tend to be overconfident in their options, and out of men who approach vs men who don't guess which pool has higher odds of overconfident men more likely to be players?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/22 10:30 PM
61

It's a combination of approachable and hot enough, usually if a guy is not super confident he'll aim for the most attractive woman who is still reasonably close to his self-perceived league. So it's not like he's gonna settle for the homeliest woman he can find just because she's "easier."
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/22 01:21 AM
1

I guess that depends on your perception of how "bad" your social skills actually are then. You're probably more socialized than you think.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/22 01:06 AM
1

That's interesting. I think the threshold for that kind of forgiveness is higher than a 7, maybe a minority of women might not care. Even in the case of a dude who is really attractive but really awkward there are women who might get creeped out. Though if you're a 9 then you definitely have a lot more leeway.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/22 12:59 AM
1

Sure, but he still needs social skills to talk to the 5s. Unless you're saying the 5s won't care that he's awkward or weird because he's a 7, and that they won't care long enough for him to practice having an actual conversation with them without scaring them away.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/22 12:48 AM
9

Women have always gravitated towards the male version of things when there were no appealing female alternatives available. That doesn't make them more masculine, it just means they're looking for quality in what they find entertaining. Just because a woman watches NBA instead of WNBA games like the boys do, or prefers male rappers, doesn't make her more masculine. It's about recognizing talent and cultural status wherever it exists.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 10:41 PM
1

I dunno, people post advice on Reddit telling guys to do this and not to do that because on some level they're hoping their words will at least make an impact on someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 10:18 PM
1

I don't think you have to be dumb to get blinded by attractiveness, that's just human nature. I'm only suggesting it's one reason why women who can anticipate that happening to themselves might be wary of giving advice that makes it too easy for guys to charm them into a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 10:08 PM
1

Well if it were that easy to figure out whether someone was a toxic person beneath the surface by just asking questions then we wouldn't have bad/abusive relationships. And pretty privilege is a thing in dating and relationships which colors and complicates the figuring out part, whether we like it or not. "At least he's hot" and "I only stayed because he was hot" are real reasons women give for not breaking up soon enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 09:53 PM
2

So you'd want to practice on the lower difficulty first, no? Oh I see what you mean. Not necessarily, there's a concept in weight training where if you're stuck at a particular weight spinning your wheels then you remedy that by attempting even heavier weights than what you're accustomed to. The idea is to shock yourself and experience a higher intensity workout, so when you return to the previous weight it seems (and actually gets) easier by comparison. Maybe you could try the same thing with s…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 09:49 PM
2

When you're chatting with people online you have more time to think of funny or interesting things to say. The flow of conversation is different, and it's easier to hide flaws like awkward body language, tone, lack of confidence, etc. Most importantly you feel more comfortable because you're in your chair in your own room. It's like a home game where you have the advantage of being familiar your environment already. Even with voice or video chat there's a gap between how you sound or act in fron…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 09:34 PM
1

If a guy looks better, then he’ll get more attention from women, and he’ll either naturally pick up better social skills, or he won’t need them because some women won’t really care that his social skills are subpar. Improving from a 5 to a 7 doesn't mean you'll somehow become "women suddenly approaching you first"-level attractive in order to get the free conversation you need to practice socializing. Or attractive enough that she'll overlook your flaws. You'd still have to take initiative, whic…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 09:25 PM
1

That doesn't change if all guys (good and bad) are slightly more attractive on average Presumably it makes it slightly more likely she's going to end up in such a situation once more bad guys learn how to reach her attractiveness threshold. Which means more false positives and more wasted time. ​ Not if every other men is also more attractive Being lovestruck or obsessed with someone is more about your feelings towards them than you rationally comparing their attractiveness with other potential …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 09:23 PM
2

nothing is forcing you to be in a relationship with the bad guys if they're attractive Except the wasted time and emotional anguish it takes for the woman to realize what a bad guy she's dating. By that point the psychological damage has already been done. Also people generally give more benefit of the doubt to attractive people, to their own detriment sometimes. ​ Not being able to know which men are good or bad isn't affected by how attractive they are Sort of agree there, but not entirely. In…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 05:54 PM
2

Right and I'm saying if a woman doesn't know which guys are good and which guys are bad, then it makes sense for her to err on the side of being cautious and not giving advice that is too effective. Since a lot of women on PPD express the sentiment that it's "better to be alone than in a bad relationship." I'm just following that logic.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 05:29 PM
3

Attractive men aren't all in relationships, and if they're toxic then being in one isn't necessarily going to stop them from going after you anyway. Also with the point about advice I think OP is implying that women are giving bad advice to all guys in general, toxic or not. Which suggests that these women aren't too thrilled about making the process of impressing her or "charming" her that much easier.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 05:25 PM
2

There's no reason women would want men in general to be less attractive This is an interesting point that sounds like it makes sense in a perfect world but I don't think it quite works out that way. Women don't necessarily want men with toxic traits to be more attractive to them because it makes their job of filtering out the good ones harder. And since you can't tell at first glance if a man is decent then it doesn't benefit women for more and more guys to appeal to her.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 04:39 PM
1

Fertility is secondary to attraction though, and even relationships sometimes. There are people who don't necessarily want children. Even when that's not the case, I can see a 40 year old woman and think she's attractive without ever trying to convince myself that my attraction is somehow invalid because of some forced logic that "her eggs have gone bad." And vice versa.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 01:07 AM
1

Yeah I suspect most people are adept at guessing age with good enough accuracy, although a 5 year margin of error isn't insignificant. Still it's likely that the exceptions who don't look their age in either direction are sizable enough for it to make a difference in terms of dating and attraction. I don't think 10% would be an unreasonable guess. One variable that would differentiate human perception of age from the Drosophila studies you mentioned is that how old people look can be affected by…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/22 01:05 AM
3

Sure. Although instead of saying "younger women are far more attractive" I would word it to something less inflammatory and more defensible like "these men happen to find younger women more attractive." That way you don't cede your moral high ground and force your opponents to actually defend their argument as to why they think age-related preferences are inherently bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 11:38 PM
3

But just because you're attracted to someone, it doesn't make it RIGHT. A 30 year old can be attracted to an 18 year old. Its still gross. Doesn't make it inherently wrong either, attraction is amoral by definition because you can't negotiate it. It's when you act on it in a way that intentionally and knowingly causes harm and without consent where it becomes immoral. Everyone knows that "just because it's legal doesn't mean it's moral," but the corollary to that statement is that "just because …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 11:35 PM
1

I thought the scientific consensus was that they only care about brains and sustenance. Then again I'm no expert in zombie biology so you could be right.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 11:03 PM
1

I don't think he's concerned about spinning plates, he just wants to crush skulls. Having said that, is there any significance to acting Chad if you're asexual and utterly unconcerned with impressing anyone?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 10:46 PM
0

As much as I disagree with the blanket statements about older women and how they detract from OP's argument, I do agree with the (badly worded) underlying point about people on PPD pretending attraction doesn't exist in order to push the "manipulation" narrative. So yes, we can call out OP's framing while acknowledging his argument has merit. You have to remember that posts like these are a rebuttal to the equally wrong blanket statement that guys who date younger are "mostly predators." In othe…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 10:35 PM
2

If it's a poor country I would choose man, if it's a rich industrialized country then it'd be more of a toss up but I'd still lean towards man. Better the devil you know and all.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 10:01 PM
3

Yeah you often see trends based on race and ethnicity. Not all but many black and Asian people tend to stay looking youthful, including facially for women and hair-wise for men. It's the same idea with younger women who claim that "men over 30 are invisible and not attractive to me at all." Often people picture in their minds the average white guy as the default, as with most conversations on the internet. For the record I don't think either one ages faster objectively, if anything it's just tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 09:36 PM
27

Why does everyone ignore the sensible middle position that's actually true, which is that men and women even in their early 20s can be attracted to men and women in their 30s and beyond, because aging and attractiveness are an individual thing that depend on genetics and maintenance and fitness? It's so obvious what a double-edged sword the "middle-aged men/women are gross" line is that I feel people don't care about the friendly fire just so they can get a jab in at the other gender. Larger age…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 09:15 PM
4

Girls don’t usually want to have casual sex That's a pretty broad generalization, you sure about that? 18yos and 30yos are in different stages of life. No one brought up 18 yos, but if different life stages were the metric for a bad relationship then a 21yo student still in college and a 24 yo graduate with a full time job would be just as "creepy."
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 08:57 PM
4

The only thing you need to have in common with someone for casual sex is that you both find each other attractive, I don't think that's a controversial statement at all. For relationships it depends on the individuals and their personalities, but I'm sure you could easily think of a list of hobbies and interests that transcend age groups. A 20 year old and a 30 year old could both like sports, for example. Not everyone's conversation revolves solely around pop culture references. And especially …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 08:39 PM
3

So then what does the age of her sexual partner have to do with her exploitation? If a guy her age uses her for sex during her "best years" then it's somehow more acceptable? Also that doesn't address the point about casual sex where both parties are well-aware of the expectations.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 08:17 PM
10

I think the age thing is usually more about looks than age for the vast majority of guys. I doubt a heterosexual man would choose an obese or even plain-looking 22 year old over a 28 year old former model just because the first one is 22.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 07:46 PM
6

I look around at people who are on average 15-20 years my senior, who all look exactly like it. The thing is you already have an idea of their ages, so by design your experiment is excluding people who are undetectably young/attractive for their age and will slip through your "older-than-30 radar." Also single people have more motivation to stay fit so that could skew the results with regard to the married older folks in your office with kids. It's the same with men as it is with women: younger …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 07:39 PM
7

To take the "peak" example, if you look at runway models the average age is around 23 so I'd say that's generally what you'd expect for women, and around 27-28 for men when they lose their boyish looks.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 05:07 PM
3

I have no idea what you're talking about but it sounds fun
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 03:26 AM
1

OK then your partner is lucky to have you.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 02:28 AM
1

Oh no I meant bother as in it would diminish your view of his attractiveness afterwards. I don't think that part is a conscious decision, but leaving your partner because of the loss of attraction would be. Still it's good you feel that way, at least in principle.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 02:17 AM
1

So you picture fetal position and it doesn't bother you or does it?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 02:04 AM
1

I think women are generally honest when they say they don't mind because they're only picturing the "best case scenario": where he loses the fight but still walks away looking cool on his feet after they restrain the other guy before he can do real damage. But I guess it's different in the moment when you see your man cowering on the ground in the fetal position and shielding his face to keep it from getting bashed in.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 01:51 AM
3

I mentioned in the UFC thread how Miriam Nakamoto dumped her "great boyfriend" because she watched him get his ass beat by another fighter. Dude likely had what you'd consider a chad physique and was stronger than the majority of men, but in his moment of failure all that mattered was that he was comparatively weaker than the other man and tried to protect himself. Of course she's just one example, and her standards for a protector are likely higher than the average. But no doubt there are many …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 01:38 AM
1

If you were engaged with a woman that was top 1%, that either you are very attractive yourself have intangible qualities that attract beautiful women got very lucky At worst it's #3 in which case you just have to get out there and meet a lot of women. Quality over quantity, but you need quantity if you want to speed up the process.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/22 01:03 AM
5

Even if you're an MMA fighter it's no guarantee. If your SO sees you get your ass kicked by another, better fighter then she might lose attraction for you and leave you lol
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/22 11:51 PM
5

I meant with absolute certainty, most men are capable of hearing noise but the problem is interpreting a signal. Usually guys have a suspicion that could go either way, but the point is that you don't want to risk getting it wrong and being called a creep or developing a reputation. Unless you really are at a party where you'll never see her again and you've got nothing to lose shooting your shot.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/22 08:57 PM
3

It's not always that cut and dry, sometimes you have to compare how she interacts with you vs how she interacts with other people. Of course if a woman touches you or laughs at your jokes or plays with her hair when you're talking then that's never a BAD sign. But it's not necessarily indicative of whether she's naturally flirty or easily amused or fidgety to begin with. If you've only just met her then you don't have that context to easily judge her intentions.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/22 08:34 PM
3

I've seen plenty of dating threads where OP was a 29 yo woman worried about turning 30 and the guys in the comments were assuring her that they find older women attractive. And women tell each other that all the time for encouragement. "I got way more attention from men as I got older than when I was young and insecure." I don't think there's anything wrong with that, even if it only applies to that individual. As for the RP thing, I wouldn't call it a "lie" because I doubt they're meant to take…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/22 08:21 PM
4

"Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity."
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/22 08:06 PM
1

Sort of. That would mean the 5/6 woman has a higher value than that particular 7/9 man, in that instance. Not necessarily all 7/9 men. The dating market operates on a very granular level of what the two individuals involved in an interaction are willing to "pay." It's more like an eBay auction than buying a TV from a big-box store.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/22 08:01 PM
7

Tbf the whole "look better with age" thing is something we tell men and women who are anxious about turning 30 and disappearing from the dating market, it's kind of a motivational thing that's ultimately harmless. I don't have a problem with it as long as the person is trying to improve themselves and not put down others. Also even if the majority of women like men their age, he's probably hoping she's in the minority. Putting aside whatever questionable attitudes he might have about older women…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/22 07:50 PM
3

It's kind of a paradoxical balancing act, you have to want it but you also have to not care about the results. If you project that you want something that badly then you'll come across as desperate.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/22 07:23 PM
3

Not kink shaming but from the way you worded that I don't think I could keep myself from laughing if I was either party in that interaction
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/22 01:14 AM
1

Depends on your boundary of what defines a pickme or approval-seeking behavior. If she likes doing or wearing certain things because men find them attractive, then that's fine. It's at her own expense and no one else's. If she actively throws other women under the bus then yeah not many guys are going to respect that.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/22 08:06 PM
2

Nothing wrong with wanting to stay looking young especially if you have the option. It's not some odd or immoral decision that has no logic to it lol
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/22 07:51 PM
2

The difference is how it's received. Well yeah generally speaking being too agreeable as a man will turn you off to the average woman, since it demonstrates a lack of confidence and leadership for the guy to worry so much about agreeing with her every opinion. You have to have the courage to break rules every once in a while and think for yourself, but not too much where you become unmanageable. Assuming they're as effective as you're suggesting, then maybe there's something they're doing that s…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/22 07:44 PM
5

Assuming that's true, it's probably because the idea of a simp is repulsive to women and therefore simps remove themselves from competition if you're a man. OTOH pickmes are more attractive to men relatively speaking and thus intensify competition if you're a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/22 07:17 PM
3

Not every bald or balding guy has your confidence, especially young guys. So it's understandable how annoyed they might feel if someone told them to "just shave it off bro!"
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/22 07:07 PM
1

That seems more like social anxiety or awkwardness than introversion though. Like introverts dislike going out in public but they're not afraid of it, and I'm sure would do it to get laid.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/22 06:09 PM
2

Because it still limits your dating pool and ages you, unless you have the right facial structure to pull off the look. Also there's just no downside to doing something that can benefit you, especially if it's that easy. Gaining weight is also natural but people are willing to exercise despite it taking more effort than a pill.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/22 06:00 PM
1

You don't think introverted men, especially the single ones, go out in public?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/22 10:25 PM
2

Desperate for commitment, then. Certainly those women frequent the subs and get misled and lied to by Redditors.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/22 10:01 PM
2

Except the desperate ones looking in those subs for advice, unfortunately.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/22 09:53 PM
1

It also makes sense in that men are less likely to get creeped out by women than vice versa, so it works in women's favor to encourage a culture where they can also approach first at their own pace and comfort level so more guys don't feel obligated to do so themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/22 09:43 PM
1

Ok, so maybe that means guys who are bitter and envious about fuckboys getting all the action are simply complaining about the impossibility of themselves becoming one. It's not that they're lazy per se, it's more that the option is unavailable to them. Based on the popular definition.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/22 09:09 PM
4

I thought the term fuckboy implied you had to be hot enough to get away with being an asshole, like Chad. In which case no amount of effort or becoming the "best version of yourself" can turn you into one.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/22 08:41 PM
2

The purpose of calling out hypocrisy should be to discourage its use on both sides, not to justify your own use of it because the other side does it too. But yeah, speaking of AWALT and AMALT neither are very effective arguments.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/22 06:34 PM
1

*Hulk Hogan intensifies
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/22 07:41 PM
2

Also the idea that you shouldn't have to approach because we have dating apps now. Clearly those aren't working for everyone, and why on earth would you limit your dating options just to make a random internet stranger feel comfortable?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/22 07:35 PM
1

I mean more the women who upvote posts like that and then gloat about dating younger men in their highly upvoted comments. You see it a lot in "Wall" threads. OP may or may not be a hypocrite herself depending on whether she agreed with the sentiment.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/22 07:23 PM
2

That's why we should normalize approaching women at grocery stores so homebodies can meet each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/22 07:18 PM
1

Eh, FDS is straight up hypocritical about age gaps and pretty bare-faced about it, so all their whining about the topic falls flat and reads like parody at this point. "This is why I, a 35 year old woman, don't date guys my age. They're all dusty scrotes, the younger men in their 20s can keep up and will actually appreciate you."
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/22 04:14 AM
1

Lol wut The problem here is you couldn't defend your argument on why abortion = organ donation. And had to resort to ad hominems to weasel your way out of having to.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/22 11:02 PM
1

I was just responding to the forced organ donor point specifically because it's used very often in abortion debates to suggest that it's no different from abortion, a comparison which I disagree with.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/22 10:39 PM
1

Similar to accepting the responsibility of having sex despite the risk of pregnancy, they made the choice to inhabit a jurisdiction knowing the risk that if they were to become the best match for someone, they would be called on for donation. People don't have control over the laws enacted in a jurisdiction after they've lived there, that's not really a "voluntary choice" nor is it relevant to the ethics of the issue. At least to the extent that you can choose not to have unsafe sex regardless o…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/22 10:16 PM
1

That's my point
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/22 10:05 PM
1

The point of the debate is about whether the ethics of the laws themselves surrounding abortion are acceptable, so the jurisdiction is irrelevant to the moral analogy. Otherwise you're basically discrediting the pro-choice organ donor analogy by saying "they can just move to another state or country." Which misses the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/22 09:51 PM
1

You mean the donors? I thought the point of the moral scenario was that they're being forced, so they don't have that option.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/22 09:39 PM
1

I don't see a huge difference between forcing a woman to incubate a fetus she does not want to incubate and forcing someone to undergo bone marrow donation. With abortion there's a voluntary (most of the time) decision to have sex with full knowledge of the potential consequences. OTOH, with the bone marrow example there's no possibility of the forced donor avoiding their fate through taking preventative actions. You'd have to change the scenario to something like...forcing only smokers to under…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/22 09:03 PM
1

Jury's still out then
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/22 08:46 PM
2

Well she is still considering him despite the crime thing, you'd think that'd be a dealbreaker...
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/22 08:35 PM
8

Not all self-professed nice guys are nice, but there are women who do assume that nice guys are even worse than bad boys to justify to themselves and others that they don't have shallow dating preferences. It's like that 19th century physiognomy pseudoscience that claims how you can tell someone is a bad person because they're ugly.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/22 07:42 PM
9

If the nerdy guy is hot Exactly, women like hot nerdy guys because they're hot, not because they're nerdy. That just reinforces OP's point that it's more about looks than about actually being nice. And the idea of finding your niche becomes meaningless if you include the caveat that it only works if you're above a certain threshold of attractiveness. "Be hot" is not really actionable advice for the vast majority of people, and if you're already hot it won't matter if you have a niche or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/22 07:35 PM
2

"Market rules" in the general sense isn't confined to the stock market. It's just supply and demand negotiating the interaction between a buyer and a seller, and how that determines value.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/22 06:37 PM
3

The gap between normalizing casual sex and normalizing casual sex for money wasn't that big of a leap to imagine in the first place, and the culture of encouraging women to "get that bag" often wins out over the feminist idea that sex work is degrading for women. Even AOC was defending that one Onlyfans medic saying "sex work is work," although her intention was probably to suggest how badly the government is failing workers.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/22 06:33 PM
3

How does dating not follow market rules?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/22 06:18 PM
3

Sex work isn't just a survival thing for low socioeconomic individuals. Women from middle class backgrounds might see it as easy expendable income and a ticket to acquiring luxury goods that they couldn't otherwise afford easily.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/22 06:14 PM
1

I think Taylor Tomlinson is pretty funny and an inventive comic, for instance, but that hasn't really changed my impression of her attraction-wise. Can't speak for other guys, of course. Your chances of being hot aren't that much better than your chances of being genuinely funny. Although I'm not sure how much you can actually "work on" becoming more funny, seems like a lot of talent is involved.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/22 06:17 AM
1

Generally speaking, is sense of humor in a woman the thing that turns guys on, or is it sense of humor in a woman they find physically attractive first? My guess is that the answer to that question, whatever it is, is probably going to be the same as the answer to your proposition.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/22 05:55 AM
1

Comedian-goggles only applies to people who are actually funny Yeah I think that's the baseline assumption. Either funny or famous. Or both.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/22 05:43 AM
1

there a difference between men getting into comedy hopping to get laid and it actually working Yeah you have to actually be good at it, but being rich and famous isn't even necessary. You just need a lot of courage. Stavros Halkias looks like Ron Jeremy with an obnoxious laugh but the guy is exceptionally skilled at crowd work and naturally confident and hilarious. His own confessions aside, I don't doubt for a second he does well with women using his unique brand of comedy, despite his looks. ​…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/22 05:24 AM
2

That's funny, I feel like there's a number of mediocre looking male comedians who have professed getting into comedy in order to get laid and, impressively, have succeeded in doing so quite well. Ali Wong has a bit about comedian-goggles in her newest special, but confesses to her chagrin it only benefits male comedians. Interestingly, stand-up comedy is one of the few venues where it's totally acceptable to tell a room full of women that they should consider fucking you later that night.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/22 04:37 AM
5

That's just not possible, femcels and lonely women exist. And the trope that men have absolutely no standards and will date or sleep with any woman is inaccurate.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/22 12:48 AM
–

That's a crazy story, do you have a source for it?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 09:30 PM
3

It kind of goes against the trope you see all across dating subreddits where woman say stuff along the lines of "when men want younger woman its because they want someone who is easy to manipulate" etc. isnt the woman who is older and has way less dating options and is more desperate easier to manipulate from a dating perspective? Yeah when you attempt to explain people's motivations without knowing them then you get into all kinds of logical consistencies and paradoxes to convince yourself and …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 07:47 PM
3

Some guys a decade older than you might be dating women your age but it's not the majority so you don't need to worry about them "swooping up your dating pool." It's not a competition. Just to put it in numerical perspective, that'd be like a white guy worrying that white women who prefer dating minorities are being "swooped up" by men of other races. It's not like women are some super limited resource, there are countless single women your age.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 06:36 PM
9

the closer you are to the baseline the more factors it usually has to be paired with Of course, you have to balance it out somehow. ​ pretty much all a woman has to do is look good to have overwhelming male attention. The caveat is that not every woman is in a position to look good enough for overwhelming male attention or even a decent amount of it. There's more of a genetic dice roll in her ability to attract the guys that meet her standards.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 06:10 PM
–

In terms of potential. Men can make up for their looks easier, and they have more time to do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 06:04 PM
10

Dating sucks for men but it does generally favors them in a few specific regards (and these are huge IMO): they have more time to get their act together if they want to get married and have kids they are not judged solely or overwhelmingly based on their looks Of course these things require a lot of hard work and some luck to take advantage of, but at least the potential is there.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/22 05:48 PM
37

Have opinions, read books, have hobbies, work on conversational skills, learn comedic timing, have concerns and desires beyond pussy, Except for the being desperate part, both the guys you described had hobbies and neither was depicted as being particularly shy, boring, or non-conversational. (The stripper story is weird but it's certainly not boring.) And you don't have to be a comedian or particularly funny to get laid.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/22 10:50 PM
1

It should be extremely shamed if self inflicted. Depends on how you define it. Someone who isn't asexual but fully capable of socializing and exercising and yet chooses not to do either out of laziness would fit the description. OTOH, shaming someone with a high likelihood of mental illness inhibiting them from socializing (not entirely self-inflicted) doesn't seem like a particularly relevant or effective response.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/22 09:23 PM
2

It's like how native speakers of a language can be fluent in the language but have absolutely no idea how to explain how the grammar and pronunciation work to a foreign learner except that "that's just the way it is." Whereas if you've never been immersed in an environment then you're kind of forced to learn about things systematically through rote memorization. It's enough to get you to passable proficiency if you really apply yourself and force yourself to interact with the natives but you won…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/22 02:55 AM
1

There's roleplay for that
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/22 11:54 PM
1

Gotta make up your mind bruh. Willingly move abroad and support an authoritarian regime to get your dick wet VS Staying in your home country to enjoy free speech, human rights, and a slightly harder time convincing yourself the local Asian women can't speak English
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/22 11:48 PM
3

It just annoys me when people use fake news to prove a point, even if the point is true. That's all. That said the whole Western decline narrative is overblown anyway, the SJW league is still a lot better than most 3rd world countries with regard to quality of life. Dating included.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/22 11:40 PM
4

Not to suggest that China has a great record with animals or that whoever did that doesn't deserve to get clawed up by a horde of angry cats , but like a lot of ragebait that gets upvoted to front page Reddit that post title seems to be misinformation.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/22 11:28 PM
5

Dude is a 25 year old, 6'4" white guy with no obvious physical flaws and serially successful on OLD apparently, so he's doing a lot better than "average" in the dating market.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/22 10:06 PM
1

Lol my bad my sarcasm meter doesn't work on PPD
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/22 06:56 PM
1

Just sayin
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/22 06:50 PM
1

You don't, but just knowing what doesn't work doesn't mean you know what does. And learning a thing by definition requires also knowing what works. You don't have to be a brain surgeon to know that drinking before operating on a patient is not a good idea. But you do need 10,000+ hours of training and practice to know how to operate successfully. Anyone can be a critic, that's not the hard part.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/22 06:27 PM
1

Any sort of advice on how to approach women? Most women don't have enough experience with making the first move or having to learn from rejection.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/22 05:03 PM
7

Lol yeah, you wonder how the people who on the one hand tout the virtue of sexual self-control and say things like "Sex isn't a need!" in the context of trying to shut up whiny incels would square that mentality with and respond to the conservative rhetoric that tells pro-choicers to "just be abstinent" as a solution to unwanted pregnancy.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/22 01:30 AM
1

Worrying about your daughter as a parent is understandable (defensive) but making character assumptions about someone (offensive) based on immutable traits like their age or race is morally suspect. The very definition of an -ism is prejudging an individual with no other information aside from the group stereotypes about their race, age, or something else they can't change. Not to mention that wanting to exert control over your adult daughter's dating and sex life comes across like creepy helico…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/22 03:18 AM
4

They're perfectly analogous situations. Parents aren't immune to personal bias (racism, ageism, homophobia) just because they're parents. Plus they have a tendency to overcalculate risk of the unknown in a way that doesn't accurately reflect reality or the risks that they eagerly took as young people themselves with little incident.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/22 09:07 AM
1

Simply put, there is nothing, absolutely nothing, that will magically work to make 90% of men highly attractive An ugly guy on a deserted island with 20 women is going to be drowning in non stop pussy. --> If you assume they're convinced they won't be leaving the island for a long time if at all. You kind of hint at the solution to your own dilemma there, and it's that you have to find that environment or niche where you will be the most competent/attractive guy by comparison to the women who sp…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/22 03:03 AM
1

OK...never mind. That was disappointing. Maybe don't revisit the topic or any other until you can back up your ridiculous claims with actual data. Unless you're just trolling, in which case congrats you're doing a good job.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/22 05:25 AM
1

C'mon Smurf, I know you're smarter than this. Saying that "99% of older men in age gaps are predatory" is an affirmative claim, not a negative. It's on you to prove it. "Not liking older women" is an entirely different proposition. Just save yourself the trouble and admit you were just exaggerating with that statistic to make an emotional point. I promise I won't get mad and I'd even respect you for backing out in good faith.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/22 05:18 AM
1

I didn't start the thread and I never said age gaps are healthy and natural by default. I responded to your comment about the topic and said that we should judge individuals on their own merits, which doesn't make ANY assumptions about age gaps. Good or bad. Now about that 99% number, if you have a source for it then that would be nice.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/22 05:09 AM
1

Lol it doesn't work that way. The onus is on the person making the accusation, not the side stating the accusation is groundless. You said older men in age gaps are 99% predatory, I'm saying there's no evidence it's anywhere near that number. I can't prove a lack of evidence, you have to support your extraordinary number WITH evidence.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/22 04:59 AM
2

How would that work though? It's kind of hard to pretend you're not famous once somebody already knows who you are. And it's hard to tell whether they're lying if they were to claim that they didn't recognize you when you first met.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/22 04:51 AM
1

Also, older men finding these guys creepy cancels your hypothetical weird stats. The only weird stat is the 99% that you just pulled out of thin air. Also citing popular opinion is...not an argument. "Men finding single mothers unappealing means they're right about single mothers being unappealing." "Conservatives finding same-sex couples disgusting means they're right about same-sex couples being disgusting."
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/22 04:47 AM
1

Heuristics make more sense if there's personal risk: you're actually involved in the relationship or involved with the people considering the relationship. Not for making moral attacks or character assumptions as an internet stranger based on broad generalizations. Otherwise they're kind of meaningless, not really justifiable, and inherently contradictory to the idea that it's morally wrong to profile individuals based on statistics about group characteristics that they can't change. 99% of olde…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/22 04:36 AM
1

I will always support a healthy age gap relationship That's part of the problem though, isn't it? What's a healthy age gap if not something that can only be determined on a case-by-case basis? No one can come up with a satisfactory definition that doesn't rely on arbitrary formulas or pop-culture wisdom. Even the ones who earnestly make an attempt to rely on a (questionably) scientific basis for their arguments, by citing brain development to explain why 25 is a good minimum for large age gaps, …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/22 04:21 AM
1

The single parent age gap thing is like the high N thing - it’s a heuristic, not a guarantee Judge the individual on their own merits Wise words to follow, I think.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/22 04:11 AM
2

If God is omnipotent and actually exists then He's kind of an asshole for not making an appearance and easily resolving the world's religious conflicts by clarifying His Word with a 5 minute press conference.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 11:06 PM
2

"Is it gay to check yourself out in the mirror?"
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 10:59 PM
11

It solves the problem of quantity but creates the new problem of "why is she really with me." To be fair that's also a problem for good-looking, non-famous men as well. Comparatively it's better to be wealthy without also being famous. At least then you actually have a way to test for gold diggers.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 09:36 PM
1

It doesn't really matter whether they're catches or not, that level of prioritizing looks over safety is concerning for anyone but especially desperate women.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 07:44 PM
2

Because a lot of people on both sides in this sub seem to think that any amount of financial success for a man means that the woman could only possibly like him for his money and not his looks ("beta bux," "sugar daddy," etc).
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 07:43 PM
4

That's to be expected, it's the ones where they make the guy a criminal or a child predator and still get plenty of matches that really concern me. I hope those aren't real but I wouldn't be surprised either.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 06:38 PM
2

Before you can actually demonstrate you're bad at sex? Unless you're so socially stunted that you can't even speak or make eye contact with someone it's not always obvious who's a virgin and who's not.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 06:33 PM
4

People who aren't virgins can be bad at sex too, so there's some ambiguity you can work with there lol. Also it's not like their second or third time is going to be remarkably better than their first, unless they're fast learners. Also, doesn't matter; had sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 06:30 PM
1

That's an interesting question. I think for certain historical and societal reasons people are selectively accepting of stereotypes and the idea of profiling when it comes to gender and age, but not when it comes to race. Not that I agree with the inconsistency but that is how a lot of people would try to justify it to themselves. Even in dating where racial preferences are more acceptable, people are loathe to stereotype a bad ex because of his race ("interracial relationships are toxic because…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 06:26 PM
4

Telling someone about your sexual past unprompted is kind of TMI, like talking about your exes. If they don't ask then you have no reason to say you're a virgin.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 06:18 PM
3

Any new technology or platform usually gets early adopted by the porn industry. Also sex is just the one topic most broadly on people's minds when you're allowed to talk about anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 12:22 AM
2

Your past, just like your height, isn't something you can change. Yeah but that's just semantics. Judging someone for having cheated in the past, let's say, is different from judging someone for being short. One is behavior you have the free choice to not commit before you do it, and makes moral sense for a potential partner to reject you based on the fear of future potential. The other is something you're born with.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/22 06:03 PM
3

So is it older men or old men? You need to define your terms. Also it's not like people are deadly accurate at guessing other people's ages on sight, or even look their age. I'm sure plenty of men and women have been "accidentally" attracted to people outside of their preferred age range without them knowing.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/22 05:37 PM
1

If we go along with your assumptions about ease of getting sex, then from a moral desperation point of view I'd say your logic is backwards and that it would be "worse" for the woman to do it. It's more scummy for a rich person to shoplift than a poor person because the former has the means to acquire things legally by paying money, while the poor person is more likely tempted by the desperation of being able to acquire a scarce resource more easily. In this case, the woman is the rich person be…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/22 11:57 PM
6

For the socially avoidant kind of guys I can see how they might use porn as a total substitute and an escape for actually going out and taking risks to meet women. But I'm not sure how big of a minority these men actually are or how much they play a role in affecting the trends.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/22 06:17 PM
3

Yeah that statement is so easily disprovable that it almost makes no sense on top of being inaccurate.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/22 05:14 PM
1

No doubt, but if you're able to execute it convincingly then that suggests you're competent enough to manage the issue in the first place. Yeah it requires extra effort that might not feel natural, but at some point you're not "pretending" anymore because you're actually capable of doing the thing you're pretending, even on a temporary basis. If that makes sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/22 09:29 PM
1

If you can pass for NT wouldn't that effectvely mean your autism isn't that serious?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/22 09:12 PM
3

Master At first I thought BDSM but the Confederate flag makes me suspect reverse-slavery fantasy
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/22 06:45 PM
1

I dunno about Korean internet but for Japan's case I don't think Twitter and Yahoo Japan are great examples of the average Japanese person's mindset because of how overwhelmingly overrepresented by right-wing uyoku types they are. They're usually the loudest voices online while the more moderate people just spectate. You'd have to pick opinions from more balanced sources, if that's at all possible. Unlike the West, social media in Japan is majority conservative by default.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/22 05:32 PM
0

Sure it's easy to say that and I don't disagree you shouldn't care so much, but let's not pretend that social judgment doesn't matter or that virtually every post on every advice/relationship sub on Reddit isn't people wanting some sort of validation that they're doing the right thing. Otherwise why only complain about seeing age gap posts all the time, and not the other ones that you personally agree with?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/22 11:45 PM
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