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datfishd00d Archive

View 2 posts and 272 comments by datfishd00d on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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–

"All women bad"
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 11:48 PM
–

Then keep feeding into your own narrative and not hearing other people's perspectives
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 11:35 PM
–

Not really, I date men who want to date me, regardless of their weight.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 07:05 PM
–

Not true, honestly. I have dated fat men in the past, and they were the only ones to ever body-shame me.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 01:42 PM
–

No one is forcing you to date. If you don't like someone, don't date them
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 01:32 PM
0

Thank you for explaining this. Sooo many groups get ruined by this type of men. I hardly socialize with men anymore
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 09:53 AM
1

Amen
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/23 05:00 PM
1

I had a BMI of 27.3, which sounds disgustingly overweight. But I had a waist-hip ratio of ~0.60 Been there myself, and yeah. At that ratio, you dont really look overweight
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/23 12:38 PM
1

I attract latinos and north africans because they think Im thicc instead of disgusting. Given Im in EU.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 11:22 AM
3

Yeah dude, people thinking we struggle with a flight of stairs. Not even after developing asthma I struggle to get to my house by the stairs.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 04:11 PM
2

Absolutely not. Albeit Im not from the US, and men cold approaching here is much rarer. Ive had it happen a few times during my life, but probably not more than once or twice a year in the past 7 years. And yeah, its often by creepy or old dudes (+40s). Other guys who have taken an interest on me organically through friends or even parties have been people in relationships, or who quickly turned abusive or assaulted me. I personally even prefer online dating because it makes it easier for me to …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/22 10:54 AM
2

Ive been told this by my therapists. Love is not enough to sustain a relationship that is hurting you, deeply. You can love someone, and that person love you, but the relationship is so bad and unsustainable its harming yourself. Because its not just the relationship, you feel bad. Your selfsteem lowers, it eventually affects all aspects of your life. Your work, your friendships, your family, your future, your health. When you are in a bad relationship, it will affect your whole life, even if yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/22 12:51 AM
2

Im very vocal in bed about my wants and likes, and give plenty of instructions. It doesn't work that great. Some men take offense or keep the "Im oblivious and incapable". I've even had my first boyfriend walk out on me mid sex because I didn't like one posture and asked if we could change. I had another guy refuse to have sex again or go down on me because he came in 2 seconds the first time. Some men can't handle anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/22 12:23 PM
2

Love is not enough. Drop the whole man
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/22 11:22 AM
1

Im pretty intolerant to raw onions and garlic, gives me pretty bad hangover the next day and upset stomach. Pain in the ass, but fortunately can eat them cooked
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/22 09:21 AM
1

It was a decent joke, bro
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/22 12:33 PM
10

Jesus this is so true. I have approached men in the past, or shown interest. They always seem to take it as if my interest meant I was ready to fuck them right then and there or that I was so into them they could treat me however they wanted. Dude, no. Im gonna cut you off the minute you fuck up
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/22 09:03 AM
1

Dude, being ugly is not the same as being an old perv.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 12:42 PM
0

Because seeing a prostitute is not the same as having a hoe phase
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/22 08:47 AM
10

I mean for a woman, isn't there anything more remotely attractive and sexy on a guy than resilience anyway? Yes to the point he kinda got addicted to the "struggle", But not this. Not at all. See, I had a pretty rough upbringing for someone in a western country, and unfortunately still dealing with life adversity. Suffering is not that cool, honestly, even if it build character, it also takes a lot from you. Most people who go through shit have very deep wounds, as resilient as they might look f…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/22 09:34 AM
19

If a man starts asking me these questions (which I unfortunately know), I will call then out and cut them off. It triggers the fuck out of me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/22 03:44 PM
12

Yeah, and this now explains why a friend of mine who is getting married didn't invite one of our friends, from our friend group, even if they are less close. But invited my friend's partners who she has had almost no relationship with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 10:52 AM
1

Literally I said my experience is quite the opposite to what you are talking about.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/21 11:34 AM
0

Yet most rapes happen between people who already knew each other and even had a close relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/21 11:21 AM
2

Well, let me tell you. Recently, a friend of mine met a guy through voluntary work in an organization HE WORKS FOR. After a while, he asked her out, and they hanged out a few times until they had sex. He didn't reply to her texts after that, and ignored her for several weeks during the activities. Literally, he works there. Like what the fuck dude.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/21 06:09 PM
1

I’m also safer because he’s less likely to pull some nasty shit, there’s a social penalty for acting that way when you have mutual friends/acquaintances. Dude, I don't know how or why, but men I pick myself on OLD have usually treated me FAR BETTER than men I met IRL and through friends. Might be my country, but here you see a lot of men treating women like shit in groups or pulling nasty behaviour on them, and no one bats an eye.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/21 06:03 PM
26

If he reschedules or doesn't text me the morning we are supposed to hang out, he never had intentions to meet up. Even if I have plans with a man, I never leave my house unless he has texted me at least 1-2h before. This way, I've avoided being stood up and waiting for a dude to show up, at least 4 times by now. If you have to text him first to confirm, great chance he is going to reschedule. At least 90% of the time. If he ever tries to reschedule, you are never gonna see each other.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 08:57 AM
1

For me, I was caught up in the "but he treated me so well at the start" or "when things are good, they're really good," and then I had endless excuses for why he couldn't be a good partner in that moment. This happens all the time. I once read "Treat women good for two weeks and she'll spend 2 years waiting for that man to come back". It's happened to me more than once that a guy would treat me well for the first 1-2 months, and then suddenly switch and slowly start treating me worse and worse. …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/21 09:43 AM
1

So, as a woman who doesn't flirt herself, I can tell if a man is flirting with me by difference. Is he only this friendly with me? Is he going out of his way to talk to me, but not others? Is this his normal character? Does he try to hold eye contact with me? Does he try to keep the conversation alive? As a woman, you can tell I'm interest if I try to do all the above.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/21 10:35 AM
1

This 1000000% so much. In my experience, when you set firm boundaries with men, they run for the hills. It's the best thing you could do. Problem comes that men do use the strategy you said, and many women refuse to engage in direct communication and set their expectations straight.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/21 08:43 AM
1

Basically this
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/21 08:58 AM
2

Okey, so Imma go a bit against the grain here and say that I respect you kept a diary about your sexual encounters. It somewhat makes it feel less cold? Well, depends on how you talk about the women in it I guess. I don't know how I'd feel if I met a man who has been with 300 women, but, I'd probably prefer that over a guy who has been with 0-2 women and has a problem with sexuality.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/21 08:31 AM
2

It's a legit hypothesis, I have a friend who is an archeologist and she explained it to me. They hypothesized that those figures were made by pregnant women themselves by looking at their own pregnant bodies. But it's just a theory
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/21 08:48 AM
3

He probably would have gotten what he wanted anyway with more patience. Because rape is not just about getting sex, is also about control and power.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/21 08:29 AM
2

I do, because I've been assaulted on first dates, or had men tried to coerce me into sex and use physical violence.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/21 07:52 AM
2

I actually like this post, and I can agree at least with the female part of it. About male and relationship fantasies, yeah, at least to a point I do.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/21 09:40 AM
2

My brother, who is 7 years my senior, didn't throw away any of the paper rolls he used during the 2 weeks I left for a vacation. He just put them around the sink.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/21 07:03 AM
1

Spain
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/21 05:21 PM
10

Not even from a very religious country myself, but I'm very aware these things are alive and kicking.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/21 04:42 PM
2

If you are meeting these men online, as in discord or such, they aren't trying to sleep with you. But they could be narcissists trying to suck you in their drama. Either way, stay away. Don't share too much with them of you see they don't reciprocate.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/21 03:24 PM
-1

When I made my comment, there were only two people who had rated themselves below average
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/21 09:19 AM
2

See? Most people are claiming to be a 7, when they probably really aren't. I've seen this IRL, too. I'm gonna be very objective, and I'd say most people would rate me as a 4, even a 3 if they are really mean. Now, I think I lay on a 4 to 6 range. I'm overweight, and even though now that I've been working out for a while, I'm getting my curvy shape back, I know most people rate fat people below average and that's fine by me. I'm fine being a 4, or being seen as a 4. So long the person I'm with se…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/21 11:23 PM
–

24F. Ambivert. Would prefer either ambivert or extrovert. Free lifting gym, would like to join a bigger gym, mine is small. I have multiple friend groups, but they range from 3 to 8, and a group of 30 acquaintances? I have a dog.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/21 06:03 PM
2

This is a very interesting topic. Like I said on another comment, sexlessness in my country is around 12%, last year. Not too bad. And we move out our parents homes significantly later than other countries. Aside from that, it'd be great if someone just compiled research papers on this topic across the world. I might get on it tomorrow, if I'm not too tired.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/21 04:52 PM
11

As another European, but also not from the UK, the exclusivity thing is somewhat present here. Most decent people won't keep sleeping with other people once you are kinda serious, but it can happen. You somewhat need to make sure you are on the same page, because else you risk just being a "side piece". If you are with a dude and he refuses to define the relationship, past 6 months it's quite a red flag. But in my experience, it has been men who brought up the topic and asked to be exclusive.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/21 04:26 PM
5

Just doing a very quick search about my country, in the one people don't move out of their parents house at an average past 30... Only 12% of people didn't haven sex last year. Though I need to do more research, but living with your parents doesn't seem like the main problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/21 04:19 PM
-1

If a woman is showing hesitation, and is asking you to slow down, it's time to SLOW DOWN. Stop and make her feel more comfortable. Ask her how she is feeling or what she wants. You can also just say "I'm not going to do this if you are not 100% sure or feel comfortable". And that's it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/21 11:36 AM
0

Have you considered that that person might want the sex, but not in the speed or way it's happening? Or that that person might feel intimidated by the other? I've always been respected by dudes I told they were going too fast. They just slowed down. If the person insists, yes, you should walk out. But if you were into it up until that moment, it's harder to remove yourself from the scenario. Setting a boundary shouldn't make things uncomfortable or make it stop all together.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/21 11:27 AM
1

let's slow down" That's a no. That person is voicing they don't want to continue what's going on.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/21 10:03 AM
7

Don’t reward behaviours you don’t actually want. This is an important life lesson everyone should eventually get to, or learn. Enabling and rewarding behaviors will not stop them, but reinforce them. They won't magically get to the conclusion they "shouldn't do that", on their own, if no one ever punishes or ignores the behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/21 10:01 AM
2

Whatever makes you sleep at night mate.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/21 08:13 AM
8

Because height doesn't work like they think it does. My parents are 5'5-5'5 both, but my brother is 6' and I'm 4'9. Humans tend to "average", not to get increasingly taller or shorter. My grandparents on my mother's side were 5'2, both. All their kids were above 5'4, even one of my uncles got to 6'1. My male cousins are all above 5'10 (not counting the ones still growing). But my female cousins? We are all below 5'3.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/21 07:07 AM
2

Murder victims??
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/21 06:54 AM
1

Chad is a term used for white, tall, attractive, young men.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/21 06:28 PM
1

Chances are the guy was “hot”. He was 5'5, latino and bald.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/21 06:18 PM
1

Insulting someone doesn't add to the conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/21 05:59 PM
1

This happened 3 years ago?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/21 05:45 PM
2

Nice to insult someone for sharing their experience to add to a conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/21 05:44 PM
3

[Deleted the story.] Edit: well, I literally shared this to show why it's a bad idea to date an older man when you are young and all I get is dudes calling me stupid. Congrats y'all.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/21 04:24 PM
2

And then this guy died at the age of 49 eating ice cream watchin TV cause she dead bedroomed the dude for like 20 years. How is this even related?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/21 10:23 AM
5

Some men do really look good. I like slightly skinny to normal guys with a good shoulder/back proportion. My gym is allowing me to enjoy that good shoulder to waist proportion.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/21 08:51 AM
5

Besides, sex work is only an option for attractive women. Yeah, no. Not true at all. I follow some sex workers out of curiosity on social media, and some of them are far from what you'd consider attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/21 08:31 AM
6

and there are people who "sank" throughout their teens until they could no longer endure the humiliation and stopped reaching out. Like I did. I was bullied from 9 to 14 yo, which left me isolated and with plenty emotional scars. I was also being abused by my mother at home. But you know what I did when I was 12-13? I reached out to my school's psychologist. She didn't help much, but she put my mother on her toes a bit, and I ended up in a social center, with teen criminals. They provided a safe…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/21 07:57 AM
5

Social skills can get you almost everywhere, money can buy you so long you can afford it.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/21 03:38 PM
2

As a woman, I'd argue it's actually the opposite. Why are you settling for a man who only wants you for sex and nothing more? Why are you trusting fake promises and half truths? Women, unfortunately, fall for this a lot when they are young, and I was there, too. Fortunately only happened once. It's not like you think it is. They are not just falling for some hot guy that looked their way. Most of the times it's a regular dude that got their attention and they fell for his bullshit. He treated th…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/21 07:57 AM
5

Yup. There's an ex friend I don't talk to because he dared to pull that shit on me when we were just making out. Common friends haven't stopped talking to him or given him any backlash because of it. People now think those things are the standard, but they weren't not that long ago.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/21 08:24 PM
1

Care to explain?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/21 04:59 PM
0

Where did I blame men? I have dated women, too.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/21 06:58 AM
6

As far as I was told, yes, but don't take my word for it. On the other hand, theory of mind is not about understanding other's individuality, but about empathy, and putting yourself on the other's place.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/21 06:27 AM
71

Unrelated, but theory of mind is something we develope when we are around 7 years old. People on the autistic spectrum don't develope this faculty, and deaf people take longer, at around 16yo. Now back to the topic: it could explain a lot if this is true. Women and men do process things differently, and it's not all due to societal norms. It does seem like a lot of men on this sub are fixated on cracking some code and figure women out, so they can succeed. Problem is that, people are incredibly …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/21 10:13 PM
3

We don't. But I often hear here that men want to avoid short women so they don't have short kids. And that's not how it works.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/21 09:33 PM
2

My parents are 5'5-5'7. My brother is 6', I am 4'9. Sexual dimorphism is real.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/21 09:28 PM
3

Wholesome. But as someone much younger, I still agree 100% with this woman's experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/21 05:08 PM
5

Well, I can only speak for myself, but I do prefer, and enjoy it when a man doesn't move fast, and doesn't want to get sex fast. To me, it shows maturity and a real interest to get to know me as a person. I don't like to have to talk a man out of sex, or have to state I'm not having sex early on. And I find it abhorrent when men ask me if "I will make him wait long". There are many ways to make someone feel desired or show attraction that aren't sex. I'd not get turned off by this, in fact, it'd…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/21 05:00 PM
1

If there are so many women walking around who have either never had an orgasm or rarely experience one, is it any wonder that they are not all that interested in men? I don't expect to orgasm during sex, honestly. Why? Because I only have with men I was very close to and in a long term relationship. But this is not the reason I'm not as interested in men. I just don't trust men, and I'm scared of them. I would love not to be, but experience doesn't prove otherwise. It's not that there aren't goo…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/21 08:20 AM
19

Yeah, I also find this stupid. Many of my female friends have faked orgasms and the like. I never have. I don't care of a man's ego is hurt, not going to lie and dismiss my pleasure for you. You gotta be active and take the initiative. Do your things and tell them what you like. Lots of men don't listen still, but you gotta try.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/21 07:52 AM
6

If you mean to ask if I've slept with men who society would deem as more attractive as me, yes, I have. Probably 3 of them. And no, I wasn't "pumped and dumped".
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/21 07:40 AM
6

I'm going to share my own experience and thoughts on this as a woman: The men who are "hot dogs in the ground" for me, are not "men I'm not attracted to", they are men who I deem as dangerous and potential threats. Like I have expressed on other comments, I come from abuse and have a disorganized attachment, or/and trauma attachment. (I'm in therapy) I'm terrified of people, and mostly men. I grew up being the ugly fat girl no one wanted, so that stuck with me. This led me to dating many people …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/21 08:28 PM
1

I have had male friends tell me some bad stories, too. You get men trying to coerce you into sex on the first date, or even assault you. On a less serious note, I'm going to tell you one of my worst ones: 3 years ago, guy showed up late because he got off the wrong station. He had parked his car there (he went by car but met at a concrete metro station), I offered to go near there, so he doesn't get a ticket. He said he didn't care. Regardless, I made sure to go to a coffee shop that was nearby.…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/21 08:07 PM
6

That's not a problem. At all. The problem is that people like to say that getting poorly treated by men is because you are trying to get with men who are above you. Truth is that, that's not true. If that was true, I'd go straight ahead and exclusively date men "below my league".
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/21 07:53 PM
3

Not the commenter you responded to, but I could share some legit terrible experiences on that level, too.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/21 07:36 PM
6

I do think men tend to underestimate the difficulties for less attractive women though. They do, and it usually comes as "you struggle because you are shooting above your league". In my experience, this is just completely false. Everyone struggles with dating, regardless of their physical appearance. I've dated a very wide spectrum of men, and they didn't treat me exactly better because they were uglier or on my level
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/21 07:01 PM
3

Yeah, it's true that a lot of men will treat you much better the more coy or bitchy you behave with them, regardless of appearance. I struggle with this because I hate playing games myself and don't really want a relationship build on that.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/21 06:13 PM
6

links a non scientific article on Forbes
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/21 06:03 PM
2

I mean, that's how it work: damned if you do, damned if you don't. We should be wary at all times, and until proven otherwise. A good man, or a good person in general, will understand. A sleazy asshole will shame you and push your boundaries. I have finally learnt after being burned many times, trusting people I shouldn't and allow them so shame me for setting boundaries. "Why don't you trust me?? You are projecting what others did onto you" quickly becomes "it's your fault, you shouldn't had tr…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/21 08:09 AM
-1

Ahhh I see. Makes sense. Though this is the most mundane thing, it's not even female exclusive.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/21 12:24 PM
0

Do you have a shrinking machine? I know many dudes 5'3 to 5'5 who do GREAT with women. A 5'3 guy in my theatre group was the guy who got the most chicks, despite there being several men around 6'. He is not as much of a stud as my other friend, but he is always with attractive women and doesn't struggle with casual sex. Another one I know is around 5'4-5'5 and he has probably had sex with more women I can even imagine. He is a softy. On the other hand, I know many dudes around 6' who couldn't ge…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/21 10:51 AM
2

My male best friend is a stud. He is around 5'10 and currently weights around 200lbs. He used to be really fit just a few years ago. His face is average and definitely doesn't have a chiseled jaw, at all. He is a social magnet and has incredible game. He treats everyone with respect and kindness. He has never had trouble pulling women, regardless of his weight.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/21 10:45 AM
1

What do you mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/21 10:00 AM
3

I mean, it does work. Last guy I was into, I met back in October and thought he was hideous and disproportionate. But, I caught him looking at me and checking me out a few times, and somehow, he sparked my interest. Fast forward April, spent some months without seeing each other, and we start meeting again. I started to find him so attractive I'd get so nervous I forgot how to talk a few times. Ended up asking him out and he turned out to be a complete jerk. And now I find him attractive, ffs.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/21 08:51 AM
-1

Some men are in huge need of therapy, it's above our pay grade.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/21 10:25 PM
1

''too bad, if he just acted like a decent and balanced person I wouldve slept with him, oh well, next.'' Oh god, this is just too true. A lot of men shoot themselves in the foot, even to get casual sex. Even when I'd had been down. They just had to behave a little better and with a bit more respect.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/21 05:46 PM
1

I always pay for myself, unless the guy insists on paying himself. But, my country is not like the US. Dates here are very chill and casual. Men have no obligation to pay for the date, and it's not that expected, but valued. If after a few hours I can tell the dude is not into me, or is only after sex, I don't want him paying, at all. But, of the vibe is good and I feel there is chemistry, I do appreciate if the guy offers to pay. I will always insist on splitting, but I will accept him paying.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/21 07:39 AM
1

What's an UV long sleeve shirt? Genuinely curious, I might be interested in getting one.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/21 07:20 AM
4

Basically this. I bet before people wore clothes on the regular, no one thought anything about seeing people naked or body hair. It's when we started adding moral value to those clothes and body parts that changed everything. Attraction might have even come as women and men got body hair? Signaling they started to sexually mature. Or maybe it just worked like in other animals. Like dogs, who seem completely asexual until there's a female dog in their reproductive cycle. Idk, I have no idea about…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/21 07:17 AM
1

I have hypothyroidism and I am a recovering bulimic, after being sick for the past 10 years. You shouldn't give medical advice so freely to people you don't know. I am at my current weight because of my recovery, and have been losing weight without trying due to a change in my medication for the past 2 months.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/21 10:08 AM
1

I am, I also weight around 150lbs. I don't look as big as you might be imagining (but I'm overweight still). I mean, are they? Because everything is proportional to size, even strength. Manouvering big bars and machines is not that easy at my size sometimes. It'd only be easier if my legs were smaller compared to my own size, but they aren't. And I have to hack stuff around the gym to make it work for me! But it's the same for the ~6'4 guy at my gym. Everything is too small for him. Ngl, I don't…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/21 09:36 AM
3

Yeah, these dudes think that if you lose weight suddenly men will treat you better. Doesn't work like that. Most of my friends are normal weight and skinny, and their relationship outcomes are the same as mine or other overweight women I'm friends with. Yeah, men at first might treat me a bit better, as in, the one that would be rude to me if I was fat won't be, but in the long run, they'd treat me the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/21 08:41 AM
1

Oh man, I so want to be like her. But I'm literally one feet shorter lol. Gotta keep lifting!
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/21 08:21 AM
2

Yes, it happens a lot. But you start seeing them as physically attractive, too.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/21 08:06 AM
1

No, it's around 65% of women and 70% of men who are obese and/or overweight in the US. Not 35/35. There are more overweight men in the US than women, even if it's quite even.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/21 08:03 AM
4

It is actually very common. I might get a lot of matches, but many men 1. Don't message 2. Don't reply to my message or 3. Stop replying after you replied to their first message. While there are plenty of men who seem "desperate" and complain women on OLD are stuck up or don't reply, there are maaaaany many men who do get matches and don't talk to them or don't reply to them. This has a lot to do with the fact men use the strategy of liking every profile and filtering their matches later. Fairly…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/21 07:21 AM
4

When you get on a swiping app you don't get matches "instantly". So you start liking guys. The matches slowly start coming in. If you wait for men to talk to you, you have to wait even a bit longer. So, let's say, it takes about 3-4 days before you start to find people you are enjoying talking to, and actively want to talk. In a matter of 3-4 days you have liked a TON of people. So, it's very easy to slowly end up with more matches and people talking to you that you can possibly handle. I person…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/21 07:15 AM
2

No. I'd rather not fuck or be with someone because I have no one else. That shit can be dangerous
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/21 07:44 AM
8

They say they do, but I personally think it's a lie in most cases. I think plenty of men try to hide their vulnerability under a façade of "I'm so logical. I never liked her. I have no emotions".
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/21 06:32 AM
1

Even if that was true, that doesn't make women any less deep.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/21 01:00 PM
3

They treat us worse. Like, I have had men be flat out rude to me for no reason other than my looks.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/21 08:46 AM
8

Okey, I'll probably get some negative comments because it's the internet, but here we go: I am one of those rare people that actually has a diagnosed thyroid condition: hypothyroidism. It's not easy to deal with. On the other hand, I'm also a recovering bulimic. My thyroid disorder and my eating disorder fueled each other for years. I am someone who was on a 800cal/day diet for 6 months just so I could lose 2lbs a week. Which stopped after a month. Lost around 24lbs total but fucked my body up. …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/21 08:40 AM
4

but they aren't a magic bullet. I've known guys in amazing shape who had zero success with women, because they still had no idea how to talk to them, or they depended too heavily on being in shape as their magic ticket to being attractive. Basically this. I'm personally not into ripped guys, but I value someone who keeps active, as I do hit the gym plenty. I wouldn't want to date a guy I'm stronger than, again. Yet, at my gym, there are plenty of guys who, even ripped, seem unconfident AF, and o…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/21 07:37 PM
0

I have, and I personally didn't enjoy it as much. I don't like muscular guys myself. Or not very defined muscles.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/21 07:29 PM
1

The confident men who pursue you are probably better socialized about how to treat people too. That's probably true. I’m insecure in my looks, but I wouldn’t pick someone else’s looks apart because of how I’m socialized. Same, and same. Yesterday, some dude at the gym hit on me, and he is not someone I find attractive. But I didn't get offended he approached me or laughed at him because of how he looks. How so haha? To test for future abuse or humiliations. Idk I have had pretty terrible relatio…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/21 05:42 PM
1

To clear things up, I was talking about types, not leagues. There are some slim attractive guys who are in a high “league” according to conventions but consider fat women their type, so the conventional league thing can’t always explain that. And a less attractive person might not consider a fat person their type even if the fat person is in a higher “league” overall. This does makes sense, and it's a lot more in line with what I personally think. I think some people get too caught up in the lea…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/21 05:38 PM
1

Obese=/=overweight
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/21 03:55 PM
1

It sounds like he was in settling mode. I mean, the dude was 5'3, overweight and had a minor motor disability. Face wise, he wasn't bad looking, but mostly average. Back then I was just 1 point shy of normal BMI, used a S-M in clothes and I have a fairly cute face. So, I wouldn't say he was someone out of my league per se. His ex was very controlling and he was somewhat treating me the same way she treated him.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/21 12:50 PM
0

I would say it does make some sense, at least to a point. I do think that people who feel insecure about their looks project that onto their partners, and might try to bring them down. Like you said, they might even resent them. I don't get with average or unattractive guys because they are "the best I can get", I don't commit to someone easily, or have sex with them either. But it does hurt to, after a while, start seeing the other person might be settling for you. I have dated men around all t…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/21 12:30 PM
1

1) Average/unattractive men who don’t use and discard women I think that what OP or myself are talking about is not men discarding us, or necessarily using us for sex. I'm personally talking about men who at first seemed very into and I had relationships with, but who at some point, would start making rude comments about my body or treat me badly. In the sense that, as soon as they got a bit comfortable, or I'd reciprocate, their attitude towards me changed. In this scenarios, I didn't feel used…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/21 12:25 PM
0

This is incredibly true, in fact, I was thinking on writing a post on the topic. Not because I'm a hot man, I'm another fat girl as OP, though it's a broad term. One of my only male friends is a stud. I've personally never liked him that way, but he is a great person. He treats everyone nicely, and kindly. He has been with tons of women, and has also dated women seriously. I totally get the "average/unattractive" men see women as ego boosts and validation. I know a lot of men have used me that w…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/21 07:31 AM
4

As another fat girl, this is incredibly true. Men who are more confident, usually more attractive, and have no problem with women, usually treat you a whole lot better. I've also dated a lot of average and below average guys, because I liked them or talked myself into liking them. Usually, the less confidence they have, the worse they treat you. At first they might treat you right for a few months or weeks, but they'll quickly sift into negging, making comments about your body, etc... I know peo…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/21 07:06 AM
5

Just to add. Some careers you'd think would attract selfless people but don't. My brother, who was and still tries to be incredibly abusive to me, is a psychologist. My mother, who is even worse, tried to become a social worker. I got into education, and I've seen it myself during university. I refuse to work with vulnerable people myself because it's too much of a responsibility, and I have a better future at corporate. But, I feel very sorry for the people that will be vulnerable to some of th…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/21 01:29 PM
1

Love isn't fair. Plenty of "unattractive" people are in relationships, regardless of their weight or whatever. No one owes you a relationship just because you are thinner than someone else. Bigger women date around, too, and have options. The statement that "big/fat girls get no love or are undesirable", is not as true as many people want it to be. They usually just want fat women to feel bad about themselves. Put yourself out there. You probably still feel like "the fat girl who boys don't want…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/21 01:11 PM
48

Oh god, this is worse than I expected when I clicked. I actually thought they'd make one or two few passable points, and then go on a rant about women. They don't want women to be people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 12:07 PM
2

Almost 3 in 4 men (73.7 percent) were considered to be overweight or have obesity; and about 2 in 3 women (66.9) were considered to be overweight or have obesity. https://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/health-statistics/overweight-obesity
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/21 12:47 PM
2

Men in the US are in fact fatter than women.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/21 11:03 AM
2

Are the people who are typically attracted to you the types of people you also like? Sometimes. I am very open to give people a chance, and I should stop doing that. Have your tastes changed to match those who find you attractive? I do guess so. I find almost everyone attractive enough to give a chance? How do you handle the situation when the types of people you're into don't tend to like you back? I don't know how to answer this, honestly. I don't care if a guy doesn't like me back, unless he …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/21 09:39 AM
10

Extroversion (74) Emotional Stability (39) Agreeableness (81) Conscientiousness (26) Intellect/Imagination (96) The problem is that, this is highly inaccurate. I have a pretty big attachment trauma due to being mistreated and abused at home, bullied at school and then had a few abusive relationships. My trauma often, but less often now, gets in the way of how I behave. I am a completely different person when I'm relaxed and with people I trust, than the person I become when something is disturbi…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/21 09:09 AM
2

He ate very little, and poorly. Your friend might have a six pack, but bad eating habits are not good long-term.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/21 06:42 AM
4

I'm a vegetarian, and have been for 5 years now. I also have a thyroid condition, so for the past 10 years I've almost always been on very strict eating (plus I had/have an ED). Its never really been a big issue. I don't care if my partner eats meat or fish. I used to experience being hangry a lot due to struggling with an ED and dieting. That was a problem, until I ate. Many of the people I dated didn't like vegetables, at all. That's a deal breaker for me tbh. Not because of me being vegetaria…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/21 07:27 PM
3

Oh, blocked and deleted.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/21 07:21 PM
7

Not all. Women can be fat and still have a flat ass or flat chest.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/21 01:29 PM
5

Two days ago I had a date with a guy I've been acquaintances with for a few months. He seemed pretty decent. He stood me up, hit me up 4 hours, drunk af, later telling me to come to his house to watch the TV. Like, Jesus Christ, it's not just men on OLD. New fucking low. Gotta keep seeing him at the gym. What a fucking loser.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/21 01:25 PM
1

I guess I have. But it's mostly because I cannot decide if I'm attracted to someone before we actually go on a date (in the case of OLD). I remember there was this guy I wasn't really into, and I found him kinda ugly. He insisted so much I ended up going out with him. 30 minutes in, there was a moment we locked eyes and I was like "damn", I fell for him at that moment and I couldn't stop giggling. We somewhat dated for a while, then things got really weird on his side and he strung me a long for…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/21 08:47 AM
1

My brother is 6' tall. Both my parents are over 5'5-5'7.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/21 01:58 PM
2

Does you mom know you leave weird ass comments to people online?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/21 07:37 AM
7

I'd on the before and after. He is hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/21 08:23 PM
5

Sorry, but as a 4'9 woman, tomorrow I'm going on a date with a guy that's around 5'5. My last date was 5'6. Most of my boyfriend's were 5'6-5'7. I've dated men who stood at 5'3, and gone on dates with men over 6', too. The older I get, mind you I'm still in my early 20s, the less I like tall men. I'd not like to carry tall man babies either.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/21 07:23 PM
1

Have you see Adele recently?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/21 07:52 AM
2

Seriously. My parents are 5'5 and 5'7 (normal for men at that time in my country). My brother is 6' and I'm 4'9.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/21 07:48 AM
1

Maybe you could emphasize meeting up without the expectation of sex because you need to get to know someone before feeling comfortable Oh yeah, I tell them explicitly and I state my intentions. I tell them upfront I'd need one meeting, just like drinks, not a date, to see if the vibe is right and I can feel comfortable with them. So far, none have come through. Like, maybe at first they'll say it's fine, but they'll stand me up or try to delay meeting up. Let me tell you another story: a classma…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/21 07:42 PM
12

Well, I don't really want to date Chad and have a dozen of orbiters. As for what I'd like to have: I mean, right now, I'm not sure I want a relationship anymore. I'd be up for a fwb type relationship, if I found the right person. But so far, even on apps, nada. Yeah I find men who want me to be at their houses in 5 minutes, blow them and leave. But that's not what I'm looking for. Even for something more casual, I always ask to meet up first with no expectations of sex, and then see what follows…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/21 05:50 PM
1

Quite the opposite. The idea of eternal love isn't "blue pilled". They are not the ones who have a problem with changing parents and women's sexuality. The ones that believe women should remain chaste and stick to one parent are on the other side. I mean, first thing you brought up was pair bonding lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/21 02:47 PM
1

You didn't answer my question, at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/21 02:41 PM
1

highly blue pilled. Are they? If we accepted, or had accepted that love doesn't last forever, and love and relationships are liquid, there wouldn't be such a problem or stigma around women's sexual parents, or casual sex in general. If relationships become this fluid, high numbers of sexual parents are bound to happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/21 02:31 PM
25

Eh, as a woman, I wish I had the life people here claim women have lol. Because my life has been quite the opposite.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/21 10:00 AM
1

Women get labioplasty for non functional reasons. It's a purely cosmetic procedure, unless your labia is thaaat big it could become bothersome. But that'd be incredibly rare. Vaginas? No, you never see or hear any woman talking about her vagina, or vagina envy. The last guy I dated asked me if women had "boob envy", and said shit "well I bet I have bigger boobs than you" with their friends. No, we don't do shit like that. I've only seen women shame other people's boobs or ass if they had a fight…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/21 09:09 AM
3

When I first found this sub, I thought it was nirvana. People actually openly analysing heterosexual relationships, as unbiased as possible, with no political correctness, and sharing their findings. Oh, my sweet summer child.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/21 08:38 AM
1

Honestly, they just make it up. 4 years ago, I was on a site to make friends around my city. I only had face pictures, with almost no make up. I got talking to a guy for a few weeks, and it was all friendly and all, until he randomly told me he KNEW I was promiscuous. I wasn't. He just made it up and tried to make me feel bad about it for some reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/21 08:19 AM
9

This is true for women too - you think ugly or overweight girls who are into star trek get praised? We don't, at all lol. I don't know how anyone thinks otherwise. I used to be into some nerdy shit in my teens, and I can tell you, nerdy/geeky men were terrible to me because I was unatractive to them. Like, to the point they'd ignore my existence or be openly rude to me if I just tried to be friendly. As I grew up, and became better looking, some of those same men had a completely different attit…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/21 10:00 AM
26

I actually agree, but, how does it apply to dating? I mean, social media is distorting people's perception on what a normal, and realistic lifestyle would be. As you said, constant travelling to exotic places, fancy dinners, perfect body, etc. But that's not exclusive to women, or their dating life. Edit: grammar
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/21 05:26 PM
1

That's the point.- it's only your dick. It's not comparable to women/men who have sucked more than one dick.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/21 01:36 PM
1

I mean, have you ever sucked a dick?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/21 08:55 AM
5

I just read the whole post. It's such a shame people pass good posts because they don't affirm what they believe to be true.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/21 08:26 AM
9

But, can you actually go into detail on why women, as a whole, can't recognize a good man when they meet them? Because, your post only says "men are this, women are that".
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/21 07:41 AM
3

Feminists see truckers as degenerates Where did you get this from?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/21 09:15 PM
6

Is it purge week?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/21 08:24 PM
7

As you can see, the sex is far from being the only benefit we would both be getting from a FWB relationship. My relationship with my friends is often deeper and more intimate than that of most formal relationships where they are exclusive to each other. I think this mindset is what's most important. I have very deep, and strong relationships with my friends, but so far, I haven't been able to build that with the men I've dated, which honestly sucks.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/21 11:32 AM
1

Replying to myself to expand a bit more: Some of these are negotiable, some aren't. I think I'm rather open and accepting of certain things. I mostly care that the person treats me well and with respect, and that we have similar core values. I like people who challenge me, so I wouldn't really like someone who is just like me. I don't want to date someone who is shyer than me, or more introverted. I'm an ambivert myself, but I find my best self when I'm around people who are more open and social…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/21 08:07 AM
2

This is something I needed to think about, so let's see: Regarding to physical appearance: I don't care much, honestly. Preferably SHORTER than 5'11. I'm very short, and I don't want to carry tall man babies. I don't care what race they are, skinny, normal or fat. But they do have to workout or be into physical activity. But not a super buff guy, I don't like big muscular men. Carries a healthy lifestyle: doesn't drink in excess, doesn't smoke regularly, workouts or is into some sport, eats a ba…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/21 07:55 AM
2

I went through something very similar last year.luckly, we had just been dating for a couple months. Tried to make it work but ultimately broke up. I knoooow how much it fucking stings. I still haven't fully recovered from it tbh
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/21 08:44 PM
1

If they care about their so finding them attractive, yes. The thing is, what I think you might be missing, is that when women say "my boyfriend is not the most handsome" or things like that, doesn't imply that they don't find them physically attractive. I might be weird but, there are people who I think are ugly, but I'm very physically attracted to them, and people who are beautiful, that I just feel no attraction to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/21 08:21 PM
5

Absolutely not. In fact, I broke up with someone over this. You have to find me physically attractive on some level, and find me pretty. I'm not the best looking woman on earth, and I don't pretend to become one. But there needs to be some sort of physical attraction, else I'm out.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/21 03:40 PM
2

1st one: He wasn't a full catfish, but he definitely looked way better in his pictures. I wouldn't had recognized him if it wasn't because he came up to me. But he wasn't ugly either. We had a couple dates and that's it. 2nd one: 100% catfish. He had used pictured on his profile from when he wasn't bald or as overweight. He looked like a chubby, cute guy in his pics. We met up, he was really overweight, balding, and smelled really fucking bad. I called him out on it. I stayed and had a coffee wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/21 09:40 AM
2

No, I'm overweight and I'd hate if anyone got the wrong impression of me. It's one of my biggest fears, so I always include unflattering pictures on my profile, and never too flattering pictures. I've been complimented when they meet me. Guys often say I look better than in my pictures. On the other hand, I've been catfished by 3 different guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/21 09:06 AM
7

Thankfully someone bothered to read the study. Women "date down" in terms of looks. But men still mostly messaged the top % women more than the rest. They all come here to whine that women are entitled, ruined the dating market, only want chad, whatever. It's just not true, and it's not backed up.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/21 07:53 AM
4

There are more obese men than women in the US, yet on the internet women, and sometimes fat women get blamed for "ruining dating for them". "UgH I OnLy MaTcH wItH LanDWhaLeS" well, don't fucking swipe right on someone you don't like.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/21 09:36 AM
1

Oh yeah, I didn't agree with that part. My comment was more on the line of "men who pursue you and display that they care and want to make plans, until you commit"
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/21 11:04 AM
1

Oh, I see. No, in my culture we don't use the gf/bf at that stage, but after commitment is defined. You meet -> you hook up/start hanging out alone -> "let's see where this goes/what are you looking for" -> keep hooking up/hanging out -> one of the two says I love you/one brings up the gf/bf talk -> you are now bf/gf. Most people in my country don't date to get married, so becoming official shouldn't really be too much pressure. But, a lot of times people can go for up to 6-8 without defining th…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/21 09:41 AM
1

I think we are running on a language or cultural problem here. Making it official for me, means determinating the relationship as boyfriend and girlfriend. And that's when you also are able to tell other people that you are officially dating. At least in my culture and language, of you don't become bf/gf, you are not official.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/21 09:26 AM
1

Eh, in the case I was thinking, I rejected the first time he wanted to get official because it was too soon. 3 months is still rather early
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/21 09:18 AM
1

But, why would you ask me to be your gf if we've been hooking up for 3 months, than? It makes no sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/21 09:14 AM
1

An attractive young women who worked for me told me that many young guys she met seemed to turn into duds soon after they got together. The alpha bad boy would turn into a beta softy. They had some pickup game, but no relationship game. Honestly, most men I've dated have behaved this way. Once you commit, they relax and stop doing anything
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/21 07:35 AM
4

The ketogenic diet makes your breath smell pretty bad, because you start running on ketones. And idk how to explain the rest.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/21 09:17 PM
1

Eh, I was 18yo, travelling around Europe, and we shared the same room at the hostal. He was british. Tall, polite, blue eyes, kinda shy. To this day, one of the best sexual experiences I've had. Which is sad. He was very caring and made sure I was comfortable at all times. He didn't really do anything, I somewhat initiated talking and hanging out, and he took his chance when the moment came. This was actually a nice memory to relive. I was having a sad day. I might even ask my crush out.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/21 09:14 PM
1

If you are so worked up about real tapas I can teach you, jeez
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/21 08:46 PM
5

I'm slightly struggling with this. I think crushes have a window, like some others pointed out. I mainly become interested out of feeling my feelings would not be reciprocated, or are not being reciprocated. So in a way, to save myself the pain. I'll point out, I have approached men plenty of times myself, so I've been rejected PLENTY of times, too.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/21 07:47 PM
5

Dude no, lube is for everything. In fact, it's better to put a little bit of lube before, to make sure the condom doesn't break.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/21 07:19 PM
32

My abusive ex, when I was 16yo, sent me a song in another language about how a man wanted to basically murder the woman he loved and piss in her skull and shit like that. And he said that's how he felt about me. I'm very happy he only took a couple months more to "leave me", because I was scared of breaking up with him. He broke up with me (face off), and literally 30min later called me asking to get back together. He then stalked me for a whole month, calling me non stop, showing up at my place…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 07:54 AM
31

Oh yeah, never ever again dating a man who early opens up about his "mental health" struggles, but had done no real work on them I am recovering from an ED, and I used to be incredibly depressed myself. But I have learnt to work this on my own or in therapy, and not expect anyone to deal with my issues.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 07:42 AM
11

Oh yeah, many men completely lose interest as soon as you agree or don't make it s challenge.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/21 07:48 PM
6

As another woman, this is all very true. Been guilty myself of a few, but I constantly see it around me with my other friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/21 07:46 PM
9

Last year, a man approached me on the street when I was going on a walk on my own: with coconut oil in my hair, unshaven legs showing, and a huge red sweatshirt that belonged to my brother. All because I accidentally looked at him. He didn't end up being a creep, but it was definitely weird. They don't care how you are dressed.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/21 06:52 AM
6

After reading all the comments you got, fuck men, seriously. Someone asked a question on the sub, you answered and they are insulting you for speaking your mind. Then they complain. I knew before I even checked the post it was going to be like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/21 06:34 AM
7

This is what women have to put up with to participate in this sub. You hit the nail
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/21 06:29 AM
1

If you went out and got to know a bunch of guys regardless of what they looked like, you would find a guy with a good personality quite fast. Oh, hell no. Also, good =/= what you are attracted to. I have dated almost every race, 5'3 men to 6'2, muscular, skinny, fat, normal. Blondes, brunettes, red hairs. You name it. My physical preferences are incredibly wide. So, I have dated an incredibly wide variety of men. That doesn''t mean they had great personalities in the end tho.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/21 12:43 PM
1

In fact, more men are obese in the US than women. So, the fuck
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/21 12:00 PM
1

Yes, chicks before dicks. It even bums me out when my friends make plans after I made plans to hang out with a guy Im dating. But Id not stand up or cancel on a guy I have plans with to be with my friends. Who I made plans with goes first, but I prioritize my friends whenever I can.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/21 11:58 AM
1

Oh, that's why I specified in my country. Men of my own ethnicity tend to find me ugly. I'm short, fat, "dark". But men from other ethnicities tend to find me really attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/21 11:33 AM
1

I mean, in my country, women who are rectangular and tall do actually get a lot of attention, if they look slender. I mainly get approached by foreigners.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/21 11:08 AM
3

Yeah, I'm an overweight woman, with a dymorphic body, and you can tell. When I wear baggy clothes, I get called fat fuck on the street. When I wear shorts (especially with tights), I get harassed as soon as I get out of the door. I don't normally get approached, because I go out dressed fairly normal, with comfortable clothes. Few weeks a go, I had a date and I was wearing a skirt, regular length. As I was waiting for my date, 2 men approached me over the span of 3 minutes.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/21 10:53 AM
8

So, so, so true. Few months ago I was dating a guy and it ended quite abruptly. I have learnt my lesson, so I didn't tell my friends even their name. Now if I ever mention him my friends are like "who?" And it's so funny.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/21 08:44 PM
20

This is SO incredibly true! I have very polarizing looks, but most men of my own ethnicity find me rather unattractive or average, and IT SHOWS. So, most guys around me are incredibly apathetic to my existence, or down right rude and spiteful. On the other hand, guys from different ethnic backgrounds, one in particular, tend to find me pretty attractive, though, not all. I remember, a few years ago, I went out with a guy who was himself really attractive. We encountered a friend of his, and his …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 11:30 AM
65

If his favourite movie is Scott pilgrim
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 06:02 PM
51

Yeah seriously, it's so fucking stupid. "Be a whore, but just for me. If you've ever done this with anyone else, you have absolutely no value in my eyes and you HAVE TO do everything you did with any other men with me too, else I will feel inferior and you are a mean slut". "Oh, you don't want to do things with me your abusive exbf who coerced you into them? Sux for you, you should had chosen better, a good guy, like me!!"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/04/21 10:15 AM
24

"I mean, your boobs aren't that big but it's ok" - my boobs are actually middle size to big. "You butt is small, perfect for me" - for your limp dick? No, my ass is not small, neither big, and has been praised by many other people. "There's hair on your ass" - yeah, so is on yours wtf. "Why do you have so much facial hair?" - I bleach and pluck the shit out of my facial hair, which isn't that much. I mean, why don't YOU have more facial hair? "Yeah that shirt makes you look fat, don't wear it" -…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/21 09:31 AM
14

Oh god, this hits home so hard. I used to be like 33lbs lighter than I am now, and had a full blown eating disorder that no one cared about because I wasn't thin enough. I was still... Normal weight, had lost a shit ton of weight, and dudes would still treat me like I was fat. Since I had an ED, I didn't think otherwise. I thought I was still fat and disgusting. Now, after gaining a lot of weight during recovery, I'm starting to see the light. I look back at my old pictures, and I get chills. I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/21 09:22 AM
20

Oh no, they come back even if you tell them to go away and block them everywhere.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/03/21 09:21 AM
66

Oh god, this resonates so much with me. There are men who have made me behave anxiously, others avoidant, other secure, etc... I only realized about this a few months ago. I can be feeling very anxious about someone, but then cut off the relationship and not struggle too much with it's loss, as I deal great with that. So, it's very hard for me to pin point which attachment style I truly have. Though you'd never catch me losing sleep trying to figure out what attachment style a man has. If I feel…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 07:55 AM
1

Yeah I'm at my highest weight after recovery from an ED, and overall, my dating life hasn't changed that much.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/21 09:34 PM
2

Rare that you find female self critic beyond "i allways attract the wrong guys". Wrong, but not because of the reasons you might think. I'm gonna go on a bit of a tangent here to explain what my personal experience with this topic has been: See, since my teenage years up until a couple years ago, I ended up dating guys who were abusive. Plain and simple. Real abuse. Everyone kept telling me I had such "bad luck" with men, and that there had to be something about me that "attracted those men". So…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/21 05:54 PM
28

Sis, yesterday I got DUMPED over text for asserting my boundaries, after having seeing each other for 2 months. He sent the text at 1 am while I was sleeping and blocked me everywhere. It wasn't even a big deal, or something I wanted to break up over. He couldn't handle it. The trash took itself out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/03/21 08:31 PM
18

Girl, I hate that. I hate that when you have sex with them, even if it had been months of knowing each other, it goes down hill and the dude starts showing their true colours. Like wtf what am I supposed to do?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/03/21 08:26 PM
42

Last Saturday I had a guy I never met up with, who stalked me, 5 YEARS AGO, text me on Telegram (one of my closest friends got her phone hacked recently), to APOLOGIZE for being "abrasive and impatient" with me a long time ago. Once I figured out who he was, I put him in his place and told him what he did was stalking, not something forgivable, and to fucking delete my number already. It's fucking been 5 years, jesus. After that, blocked and deleted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/21 10:25 AM
4

God these people are DENSE. Like, do you have to get married for someone not to be a piece of shit, or else "you had it coming? Lol what the fuck. I haven't been pumped and dumped perse, but like you, I have had weird scenarios with men who pretended to be into me for at least 3 months, only to later slow fade after we had sex, or even weirder shit. This has been confirmed by other friends of mine, even guys, who have told me a lot of dudes will go to great lengths just to get laid, once. If you…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/21 09:46 AM
15

What the actual fuck
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/21 09:31 PM
1

I've been pondering on some things lately about the image and concept of fitness people have. For example, a female BJJ (brazilian Jujitsu) champion of my country works at my gym. She is a physician, but also practices many contact sports and halterofilia. I frequently see her working out, running, on a bike, boxing, etc... She is actually, quite chubby. She is very tall (5'10 maybe?), and is probably around 200 lbs, or more. According to what people think being fit is, she'd not be fit at all. …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/21 08:58 AM
1

A month ago I had a terrible fight with mine because he didn't want to walk out dog as he promised. He told me shut the fuck up, and when I responded back, he threatened to beat me up. He is 6ft and I'm 4'9. Edit: he is algo 7 older than me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/21 12:15 PM
15

As an overweight woman, I think the weight is actually a great filter. I have been thinner, struggle with bulimia and hypothyroidism. I got slightly more attention (I still get plenty now I'm bigger), but the quality was the same. Yet, you can tell, after shitty experiences, when a dude is actually into you, and when they aren't. Even though some do fake it well. But, at least I don't have male friends faking being my friend because they want to fuck me. Many of my thin and very pretty friends g…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/21 08:39 PM
382

God, that's literally my brother.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 11:39 AM
2

It baffles me how men think women with "high body count" behave. I know women with n counts on the lower end, who have had many serial monogamous relationships, but have CHEATED on their s/o. Consistently. And yet their body count might be smaller than 5. You don't need to sleep with many people to be a cheater. Yet, on the other hand, I know women who have have sex with significantly more people, but who waited at least 2-3 months to sleep with them, and just a few months down the line things f…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/20 08:56 AM
40

Also if their favourite movie is something like scott pilgrim or enternal sunset of an spotless mind.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 11:53 AM
11

I went on what I thought was a date a few weeks ago, only to find out after having a great time that he was looking for nothing and it wasn't a date. Like wtf you asked me out?? The he texts me later to tell me how much of a great time he had had.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 10:46 AM
2

Oh yeah, I totally agree with your perspective. Because putting a show to make a point on a date would make anyone uncomfortable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 09:22 AM
2

If its a forecful date with a stranger you don't know, that could be awkward, but not offensive. If he takes offense is because you are hurting his pride in some way, and I'd honestly not want to be with a guy like that. I want to be able to treat the person I'm with on occasions, without him feeling emasculated because I tried to take the check once, because maybe it's his birthday. 50/50 cool woke girl is one thing, but being equal to your parnert is another.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 09:11 AM
7

I actually know this girl from a few years ago. She was or maybe still is, a camgirl, polyamorous, does drugs, has done porn, etc... she also thinks she is superior to most other people because of her personality type and bc she is "hot".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 12:03 PM
14

I think she was just thanking him for breaking up with her lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 07:51 AM
28

Offended? If a guy can't take that he is not HVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 07:48 AM
6

Fairly sure I've read this exact same post some years ago
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 08:44 PM
148

Look up Artemisia Gentileschi!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 12:29 PM
2

THANK YOU SO MUCH!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/20 02:23 PM
6

No, when china had the one-child policy, many baby girls were abandoned, killed, aborted or put on adoption.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/20 12:41 PM
32

This couldn't be more true.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/20 08:46 PM
47

So, right now I'm going through this: I broke up with a guy I dated for 7 months, a month and a half ago. He was "a good guy" for the most part, but he was a child in many aspects, didn't communicate well and he made a comment about my appearence that made me feel incredibly insecure. So, not worth it. This situation has given me a lot of anxiety and a lot of free time. I joined a gym for the first time in my life, and, as a fat woman, that was a really big step for me. Many emotions. There are …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/20 11:50 AM
139

Happened to me, to a lesser degree. This shit is real.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/20 09:30 AM
26

I've spent the whole morning fucked up after reading that post. Its do disheartening.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 12:29 PM
57

They really be doing that. When I was younger, I had a lot of dudes pull the "he only wants you for sex" line, to make you feel bad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 11:02 AM
11

I'm not into it myself, but I'd never laugh that way at someone. They want to prove they are LoGicAL.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 10:05 AM
12

I'm bisexual, but I'm more romantically attracted to men, so my dating pool is mainly men. When I used tinder, I'd mainly swap on men, but sometimes I'd set it on women-only and HOLY FUCK. Yeah men constantly complain women put no effort on dating apps, but that's soooo far from reality. Most profiles were witty, well-thought bios with good or at least interesting pictures.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 09:30 AM
26

2 years ago I met a guy IRL. Friends of friends. He took an interest on me and kept pursuing me for a few weeks. He stated he wanted to get to know me seriously and all of that. We met up for lunch. He'd not let me speak and started eating from my plate ???. I was visibly annoyed and he apologized. We went for a walk after lunch and he suddenly blurped out "I want nothing serious with you". So I told him we were never gonna see eachother again. He called me stuck up and berated me. I told him to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 07:47 AM
5

Unlike those women who are super bossy, I'm one of the guys. Fuck the haters. LOL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 12:33 PM
26

I'm 23yo and broke up with my boyfriend a couple days ago. I feel you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 07:36 AM
9

So, while I like this concept, I don't buy it. Why? Because I had a friend who'd constantly say this, and do nothing about her relationship and refused to communicate or dump his ass. She'd be constantly complaining her boyfriend didn't do xwy she wanted him to do, or wanted him to be like, but refused to talk about it with him. Obviously, you shouldn't have to ask for basic respect or human decency. But this was not the case. She also refused ro dump him, because "she loved him!". Sis, do somet…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 07:40 AM
-3

r/karmaconspiracy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 10:53 AM
63

Yup yup yup Had a FWB once. He wanted to be fwb and suggested it. Whenever I wanted to have sex, he woulen't have it. He only wanted sex on his terms, and when he pleased. If I expresed interest, he'd cancel or put excuses.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 07:06 AM
48

« you think your kinks etc come from your own will but I think you’re wrong and you’ve actually internalized abuse against women to the point that you find it pleasurable » God, this is an idea I haven't been able to put into words for a long time, but it's something I struggle with soooo much. Thanks ror your analysis!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 07:38 AM
4

There was literally a post yesterday on FDS about a woman explaining what she does for her man, I added my own doings in the comments. We do think about what we bring to the table.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/20 09:26 AM
43

I wanna add my own "doings": My boyfriend and I started dating before the pandemic breakout. He has masters degree education, but currently unenployed. He had 3 interviews lined up the week the lock down started in my country. He is currently living with his parents in another city, but has already been getting some interviews again. This man is incredible to me. He listens, he cares about me, he is always there for me. He always wanted to invite me out, bought me things, even offered to lend me…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 07:58 AM
46

This is something I realized some time ago. Bad people try to push everyone's boundaries,and stick ro those who don't stand up for themselfs or don't see the offense. I saw this at university: we were a group of 8 girls, and there was one really toxic one. I spotted her almost right away because I had had a friend very similar to her in the past. Two of us didn't let her get to us, and we kept her at an emotional distance and didn't let her get too comfortable with us. She didn't target us. But,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 01:06 PM
20

Ewwwwwwwwww
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 07:07 PM
3

I'm gonna distance myself from 2 friends because of this exact thing. I've been very picky after having an abusive relationship in my late teen, and having dated assholes in my early 20s. But I stayed single for the last 3 years, and didn't commit to anyone. They critizated my decisions, and even said "I'm looking for reasons to drop them". Bitch, I don't know you, but I don't wanna end up beaten in a fucking coffin.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 08:21 AM
20

In my experience, those things often lump together. He is shy and sensitive at first, then becomes agressive and violent. And afterwards blames and guiltytrips you for everything he did to you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 08:52 AM
17

I don't know either. I'm fairly sure things like this happen, and have happened. But the internet and the great amounts of fake posts and trolls amplify the exposure to those events, seem to magnify it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/20 12:36 PM
55

This is a troll post. Looked at his post history, and he has another post about wanting to fuck his boss from 17d ago.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/20 11:44 AM
74

I also deeply agree it's fine to ghost dudes if you think they won't take rejection well, or if you haven't even met up. I've had soo many dudes blow up on me, and we hadn't even met.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 10:34 AM
4

She is also pregnant with him
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/20 11:25 AM
18

There's a short doc, I think from VICE about a somewhat common practice in the north of Colombia, about... fucking donkies to lose your viginity. They showed a dude fucking a donkey. I got chills by writting this. I'm not sure how prevalent this is now, but even in my country (Europe), I know it was common in rural areas last century. Brb im gonna puke
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/20 09:16 AM
1

Even though I don't trust those tests much, glad to hear some tahino's DNA got passed down :)
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/20 02:14 PM
1

There's very little tahino blood in them, like in the rest of the caribean due to the plagues. If they have north african blood, it's most likely due to the spanish settlers. We have moorish blood. But yeah, plenty of subsaharian blood bc slavery.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/20 12:45 PM
2

I'm 4'9 actually. I've dated men over 6'2 and 5'2, too. No man has ever rejected me for my height lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/20 12:30 PM
7

Ohhhh girl, this has happened to me before. It's nuts. One guy about 2y ago asked me to be his FwB (we had me IRL tho). I agreed as I wasn't looking to date anyone. He barely texted me or called me after that. We'd see eachother once a month tops. He wasn't even getting laid with other girls. He just spent his time talking to other girls on IG who didn't even wanna fuck him. Ghosted him and he became FURIOUS about it. I've had 2 experiences OLD like that. With one, I did hang out with him 3 time…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/20 09:53 AM
2

Im a fucking woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/20 09:34 AM
2

My 89yo spanish grandmother has told me how she started hitting a man on the street who tried to touch her when she was just 18yo, in like 1949. My country was a fascist, catholic dictatorship, and my kick ass grandma beat a dude up for trying to grope her. She married and had 8 kids with a good man at a decent later age. Dunno, maybe your grandmother just liked being groped by weirdos.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/20 02:09 AM
12

It happens with younger men, too! I know a guy who is currently 24-25 and he is using pictures from when we were in HS on his Tinder. Also, a lot of men I met up with last year: total catfish. They had VERY few pictures, and VERY staged. There were 2 guys, that if I hadn't explicitly asked for more pics, I wouldn't had recognized them. And one who looked great on his pics, but IRL his teeth stick out his mouth very prominently. Like, I don't really care about their looks, I've gone out with "ugl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/20 09:47 AM
4

Yes, wasn't reprimending you about it. I found it quite annoying when I realized, too
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/20 09:22 PM
10

The guy who posted that comment is literally a kid
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/20 05:35 PM
2

Have you ever been assaulted?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/20 08:52 PM
4

This is something I had to come to terms when dealing with past abuse. In concrete, with an abusive relationship I had during my teenage years. The guy truly fucked me up, no excuses. But I realized, he was no abusive mastermind. I have met a lot of guys after that, who did know what they were doing, but, most of them were scarred kids themselvs, projecting and trying to take what hurt inside on someone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/20 06:33 PM
2

I personally do this a lot because of sexual trauma. While oral sex or foreplay in general doesn't trigger me, PiV does. I tend to only have PiV sex if I'm either REALLY horny or trust the person a lot.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/20 08:46 PM
9

Spaniard here, too and can confirm. Although I'm fine with not having to dress up to be honest. I don't want to waste time dressing up without knowing if the guy is gonna be an asshole. But I also reject drinks. I don't like drinking on a first date. I preffer meeting up for coffee, lunch/dinner or a museum. And as others have mentioned: in my experience, here guys can go up to 3 months seeing you/talking to you, just for sex. Although, with some experience, you can start to easly weed out the o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/20 02:04 PM
11

In my experience, those are the most dangerous types of men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/20 11:38 AM
7

"Yeah, men suck": I also suck, but I'll try to picture like I'm not like other guys. I'm worse. "I'm a feminist, I was raised by a mother and always lived with my sisters. I've defended women before from assholes": I might not be a sexist bigot right away, but I won't hold myself accountable to my typical male behavour because I truly believe I'm above that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/20 11:37 AM
11

I have a "trick", as in, if a guy says this, I'll RUN for my fucking life. If he SUDDENLY brings up that he is a good guy, and who has defended women from being sexually abused before, with 0 context. Run. First time that happened, the guy raped me when i got at his house. Second time, the guy guilty tripped me and tried to coerce me into sex (didn't happen). Also, if they admit to having forced women before or being too pushy "but now they've changed". Nope.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/19 11:21 PM
9

I mean, a man doesn't need to be rich or have a lot of money to be HVM. I'm from Spain, and this week I was taken to a modest bar-restaurant around my neighborhood, he invited me and was nice. Walked me half way to my house (because I preffer to keep private where I live).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/19 02:16 PM
7

And the "laid back"-ness. Yeah, we are laid back, but I'm not gonna let you walk all over me, dude. Like, you are not supposed to expect nice things, and you should conform and just keep it chill.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/19 02:10 PM
3

Thank you sister <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/19 10:50 AM
5

Funny, because I'm a 4'9 woman who has stood a fight with many men, who were bigger than I was. I was pretty badly bullied as a kid and a teenager. Guys would hit me and try to pick a fight with me, so I had to learn how to fight and defend myself. I've even had knifes point at me. When I was 14yo, an old man tried to grope me on the bus. I hit him and he got off the bus right away. Now as an adult, I've beaten a few men at arm wrestling when I was fitter. I've made men who tried to harrass me o…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/19 12:09 PM
15

Funny, because I'm a 4'9 woman who has stood a fight with many men, who were bigger than I was. I was pretty badly bullied as a kid and a teenager. Guys would hit me and try to pick a fight with me, so I had to learn how to fight and defend myself. I've even had knifes point at me. When I was 14yo, an old man tried to grope me on the bus. I hit him and he got off the bus right away. Now as an adult, I've beaten a few men at arm wrestling when I was fitter. I've made men who tried to harrass me o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/12/19 12:08 PM
23

Very true. The men I've met IRL organically or through friends have been overall significantly worse than the men I've met on OLD. This year alone I've had 3 different guys I met IRL hide from me the fact they had a gf. While my worst OLD experience this year was being stood up and a guy with really bad BO. Edit: typo
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/19 10:44 PM
12

God this is so true. My 29yo brother was coddled af. He didn't even finish his degree. He does have an okay job, but he still lives at home, contributes nothing, started working at 24. My parents stopped doing shit for me at 12. I'm 22, graduated and doing an internship on big company in my field. Have been working on/off since I was 18yo. My parents expect me to do half of the house chores and help, while he doesn't even clean after his mess.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/19 08:53 AM
3

I just put every example that came to mind of why I have cancelled a first date with someone. He obviously wasn't a painter. I'll add more context: we had been talking for a few weeks to a month now, and we were discussing sex (in general), and then he came up with "You can come to my house on the first date, and we'll have sex". I had already stated before that going to someone's place was a no-go for me on a first date (as I was sexually assaulted by a guy in that situation). So, it wasn't lik…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/19 02:04 PM
3

It was said in a different language, and it sounds way worse than in english. In english, it sounds "okay", but in my language, it was more like "I have no idea how you are feeling, and I won't even try to bc I don't givr a fuck lol". It was also rude because he brought the topic up (I had posted an IG story just saying "oh well, my brother is moving back!"). And he insisted on me telling him about it. Then he threw that comment in, I said it was rude, and he proceeded to say how he was "such a …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/19 11:15 AM
16

- "I don't have a lot of empathy, but I have good oral-sex skills" -"I'd say I put myself in your shoes, but I've never lived that, so I don't" (He brought up the topic, I wasn't venting on him) - "Stop complaining and wise up, seriously" (I had just told him it was really warm that day and I should had worn other jeans). - *He starts rumbling about how he doesn't like emotional people, and doesn't feel a lot of empathy for others* - "Hey maybe we could meet up at my place for the first date ;)"
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/19 10:11 PM
16

I have never flaked on a date, but I have cut off men who I planned on going on a date, because they got creepy, sexual, or showed strong lack of empathy or lack of social skills.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/19 09:52 PM
1

Dude no, I'm also from south europe and status doesn't play a greater role than appearence lol. Maybe he is from the east, but here in western-southern europe, that's just complete BS. Where I come from, ugly men have no problem getting laid/having a relationship, same for ugly women. I've seen my fair share of couples where one was ugly and the other was attractive, regardless of gender. It's the shy awkward guys who have a problem dating, regardless of their appearence.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/19 01:12 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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