| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 12 | He’s USING you girl!Ewwww | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 09:24 PM |
| 7 | I recognized a rebound and love bombing situation, stood up for myself and ended it!Good job !!👏👏👏 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 05:02 AM |
| 15 | Been seeing each other 4 months - how to DTR?Good question. I think the answer is hard to communicate because it has a lot more to do with the way I carry myself. Years ago I would be so eager to make it official and him ask me to be his gf, but I quickly learned that never ends well. So I internally just stopped caring about wanting to have a bf, and genuinely. So when I met this last guy, I was still dating other people the first couple weeks. Then we discussed only dating each other, because we really liked each other. He started callin… | /r/askFDS | 13/09/20 03:43 AM |
| 1 | I know FDS generally doesn’t approve of Bumble but here’s a little workaround.Wow thanks for the suggestion, I’m going to try this out for a week! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 12:51 AM |
| 38 | Been seeing each other 4 months - how to DTR?Absolutely don’t ask. I followed this in my last relationship and after 4 months, he was begging me to make a commitment. And I agreed, and then he stopped being so great so I dumped him month 5. If he never asks and you no longer feel safe, feel free to excuse yourself from the relationship. | /r/askFDS | 12/09/20 11:01 PM |
| 21 | Imagining an independent meHey girl, I’m an indian woman myself. My parents are quite progressive and always expected me to find my own partner, while they did encourage me to date an indian guy if possible. I started dating at 22, now I’m 26 and I’ve dated 3 men from all different backgrounds. It didn’t work out even though those relationships started out great. Most of them exhibited LVM characteristics eventually. Basically I haven’t found my HVM, but my parent are starting to get worried. My mom has been begging me to… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 09:38 PM |
| 2 | Late Date. Do you wait or leave?Same, 20 tops but at that point I’m in a bad mood anyway | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 07:47 PM |
| 4 | Late Date. Do you wait or leave?Same, 20 tops but at that point I’m in a bad mood anyway | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 07:47 PM |
| 30 | We’re retiring the “Seeking Advice” flair and redirecting all personal relationship questions to r/AskFDSYesss. I also love that it’s open to men who want advice on becoming HVM. But of course it’s not our job to teach anyone. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 06:24 PM |
| 2 | Don't Forget the Search Bar Leads to a GoldmineI sent it to a friend who learned the truth the hard way and they love it. I also sent it to someone currently in a shitty relationship and she of course thinks it’s too harsh. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 05:16 PM |
| 2 | Don't Forget the Search Bar Leads to a GoldmineI JUST READ IT ITS AMAZING. I’m sending it to all my friends who have experienced abuse!!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 03:55 PM |
| 22 | Disappointed in a women’s advice to this woman. Facebooks X only women thread. I see too much pickme validating this guy.Yea I didn’t think about this first. But I would never put myself in this position anyway. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 03:05 PM |
| 64 | Feeling the need to dump your trauma is a form of codependency. Don’t tell romantic interests your traumas until you’ve vetted them with time and patience. Best case scenario is to never tell them at all.Same. I distinctly think of this one first date where he unloaded and then I did. Big mistake because we bonded far too quickly. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 03:01 PM |
| 5 | 👌YESSSS👏👏👏👏👏👏 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 03:16 AM |
| 8 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 10 2020You’re absolutely right :) I do have both a vibrator and a cat and I can honestly say I’m much happier now than the end of my last relationship! I think I’ll focus on making new friends | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 02:35 AM |
| 34 | I’ve never seen a more accurate depiction of marriage before this one... It’s funny (but depressing), because it’s true! 😂I saw this and knew someone would post it on FDS! 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 12:31 AM |
| 5 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 10 2020I really like that, HVW attract HVM, it’s a good mantra for when I’m down. And itll remind me to constantly focus on me and make myself happy :) thanks for your support! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 09:55 PM |
| 20 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 10 2020I love FDS and throughout my 20s I naturally adopted a lot of its principles after learning from mistakes I (26F) or my friends made. It’s quite logical and I trust it. However, I feel like there’re a lot of posts about LVM and it inevitably makes me feel like there’s no point in even trying. This is exacerbated by having very few HVM in my life. I feel quite angry lately, which can be a helpful emotion but I want to make sure I don’t lose the loving kind parts of myself. Wonder if anyone has th… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 05:27 PM |
| 5 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 10 2020Congrats!!! Good on ya :) are you going to stop talking to him? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 05:15 PM |
| 8 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 10 2020The fact that I can’t think of any is telling... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 05:14 PM |
| 9 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 10 2020I feel you girl, I’m entering my late twenties and wondering what the point of men is. I’d really like to figure out my career, my mom always tells me you need to figure this out so that you have self-respect before entering a relationship. If you don’t a man will use that against you after you have his kids. It’s good you’re noticing the settle mentality. I think the cure for that is just being really in tune with yourself and what is good/bad for you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 05:13 PM |
| 11 | Though you ladies might enjoy this article by artist Sophie King (her insta is awesome)Thanks for sharing! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 05:02 PM |
| 11 | Online Dating 🤪I get that you’re just kind of laughing at him but the more you engage him the more he feels justified in being a pos. Block and delete. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 04:19 PM |
| 10 | It’s always the best ones, isn’t it? 🤣🤣🤣I think it makes them seem subversive to women who have terrible terrible standards. Bc I know someone who goes for these fugly men, theyre “odd and different” 🙄🙄🙄 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 02:01 PM |
| 5 | I am a pickmesha and I'm marriedYea this is wayyyy more than just a pickmeisha. You are being abused, possibly sexually more than verbally. You need to get out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 01:04 PM |
| 7 | Pick me qualities I’m seeing in this groupThanks!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 02:06 AM |
| 3 | If liberal feminism was a comment. They are so close to realising it but they just don't want toThis is absolutely my ex and it’s insane that I didn’t know what was doing on. He would tell me feminists just want to be men and that what they really need is a verbal smack in the ass 😡😡😡 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/09/20 07:13 PM |
| 8 | Ladies I just don’t get certain behavioursThis is something you have to learn the hard way. I used to believe in love but love doesn’t exist in the way we are programmed to think it is. Learn from this experience. Men are capable of throwing you out without hesitation, and in those moments you have to be there for yourself. You have to tell yourself you are worthy, because a man is too fickle. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 11:34 PM |
| 6 | Don't send nudesAbsolutely. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 11:28 PM |
| 27 | At first I felt for her until.. (let me know if you got to that part in the comments). 😣😣😣Sad, even if I don’t like blow jobs I wouldn’t let myself feel bad about it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 10:40 PM |
| 9 | From removeddit, this guy's comment on a post by a pregnant woman who's husband is buying nudes and sexually talking with other women. I worry what he said is true: men will always feel something is missing in a monogamous LTR, even the faithful men who do try not to stare or are porn-free.I agree with this. Let’s all think really hard about some positive male role models, for me it’s Obama, Justin Baldoni, my coworker who treats his wife like a Queen. I have no idea what desires are in their head because that’s none of my business but outwardly they respect their women and just people in general. We can’t make excuses for LVM bull. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 10:11 PM |
| 9 | Don't send nudesWhy aren’t these women at least using Snapchat or something like that? Still a bad bad idea but sending pictures sounds insane to me | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 10:06 PM |
| 29 | How did a conversation about working out turn into me cooking for him? That’s so cute, the lil’ baby wants something for nothing.🙄 (I have a food blog.)Exactly my thought! I bet he saw that as an in to be LVM. Little does he know you’ve got an army supporting you ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 09:32 PM |
| 65 | The fact that I was in love with this song as a child...This is how they brainwashed me into a pickmesha! No more! Lol there needs to be a playlist for Queens | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 09:23 PM |
| 1 | Just need to ventI’m so sorry, it really hurts. It’s physically painful. It can hurt and also be the best thing you ever do for yourself. It can hurt and still be a powerful act of self love. You deserve better. And you will get better, you’re so young, I wish I found FDS when I was 22. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 06:17 PM |
| 6 | Why do men think stuff like this is going to make us want them? 🙄😂😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 06:15 PM |
| 3 | Anyone tried this?That last sentence is very telling. I think you’re right, you deserve to feel uplifted in your friendships, not just gossiping about men which is so limiting our potential as women. I myself am really trying to de prioritize men in my life and prioritize my health, hobbies, family and friends. But I feel you, I used to have those friends where all they want to talk about is boys. I used to be that person many years ago!! But now those same friends don’t talk to me about men because they’d be emb… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 06:14 PM |
| 6 | I broke upThe exact same thing happened to me when I dumped a guy, they will try their hardest to make it your fault because of course they were perfect. Their egos do not allow themselves to be wrong. Their minds can’t handle it whereas we as woman can handle humility. But don’t, don’t take any excess blame. Have personal responsibility but don’t listen to another word he says at least for 6 months. Remove him from all social media, block on whatsapp. Etc | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 04:53 PM |
| 8 | Anyone tried this?Oh geez wow, I currently have a friend who is in a similar situation. She thinks he’s the one and is willing to put up with things but I know the truth will eventually be too big to ignore. But I don’t get into these disagreements anymore, I’m not trying to change anyone’s mind. If a friend wants to overlook major red flags, I don’t say a word but you won’t catch me on the phone with her when she’s crying for hours in 6 months. Personal responsibility. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 04:42 PM |
| 30 | Men are Casually Comparing Themselves to Predators and Thinking It’s Solid Logic.Yea I believe that’s a female lion in that picture ! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 01:35 PM |
| 19 | Anyone tried this?I feel like any guy who would lie about his job is too dishonest for me anyhow. So actually his test would weed himself out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 01:29 PM |
| 6 | I messed upNext time don’t tell him you don’t want to have sex right away, that’s a challenge to him. Instead, just don’t have sex. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 02:50 AM |
| 4 | How do you balance showing your love language and not being a doormat?You sound like an enneagram type 2, so it really is a personality type. But I would say it’s more of a mask. I would ask yourself how you I feel about your own worth. Do you think you are deserving of nice things? Especially from someone you do nice things for? Do you think you have to give in order to get love? Instead of believe you deserve things just for being an amazing woman. The act of giving itself before properly vetting someone will invite a LVM. And they will treat you like a doormat.… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 02:46 AM |
| 3 | A precautionary tale, of flags, boundaries and what lies deep under the 'cover'...He must have learned from the past 3 engagements how to cover up his tracks better. Which I now will consider a red flag. I wouldn’t feel bad at missing all those considering the green flags, just glad you got out when you did. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 02:40 AM |
| 2 | Guy harasses, makes false accusation, shows threatening behaviour and then still expects me to be interested?Woooow the worsttttt!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 02:33 AM |
| 19 | Why do men think stuff like this is going to make us want them? 🙄It’s because it works on some women with very low self-worth. They tell themselves he can’t be that awful and they want to prove themselves to him, daddy issues as they say 🤷🏽♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 01:09 AM |
| 6 | What are the differences between Keeping Secrets/ Privacy/ Having Boundaries in a relationship? I really struggle with these concepts. I would love to hear your definitions, examples, and what you think is acceptable or not among these categories.Hey I’ve been in your situation before, this was before I realized my value as a women. I used to put men on a pedestal, unfortunately doing that psychologically makes them disrespect you, men and women actually. Even if they love you. But I get it, it’s just how you feel and you need to feel validated. But the truth is that you have to learn how to validate yourself more than the validation you get from him. (Therapy and self-help books can help with this) Naturally this will make you an amazin… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 07:13 PM |
| 12 | What are the differences between Keeping Secrets/ Privacy/ Having Boundaries in a relationship? I really struggle with these concepts. I would love to hear your definitions, examples, and what you think is acceptable or not among these categories.This. Also I think boundaries are different for many people, which sounds nice but it can get women into trouble. This is why I love FDS for strategizing why certain boundaries are good and healthy for us. Pickmes have little to no boundaries, or they use “communication” skills to constantly remind LVM of boundaries that will keep getting overstepped. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 05:14 PM |
| 12 | Written by a man.This is basically asking a woman to manipulate them, because treating a man well isn’t going to work. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 05:10 PM |
| 75 | If your man looks at other women, he’s willing to cheat on youSame, it was just giving them permission to disrespect us in the future. Silly us. I thought I was supporting other women doing this but it was actually supporting the objectifying women | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 03:18 PM |
| 25 | The pictures you post are inconsiderate, the problem is definitely not the pornsickness I possessYou’re sooo right!! “You’re not even very attractive at all” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 09:01 AM |
| 5 | Personal responsibility comes into play when weeding out and keeping out the losers.I love this! Leveling up our consciousness | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 02:23 AM |
| 11 | If your man knows the names of pornstars, he’s pornsickWhen I was telling a friend of mine that my ex would tell me about onlyfan girls that he doesn’t pay for (??) she assured me that was a huge red flag. Thankfully we broke up very soon after, women helping women but yes it really is common sense. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 08:23 PM |
| 14 | My desi aunt and uncle are looking for a daughter in law. Sign up with the name of the woman you hate.Ugh so gross. My indian mom would love for me to get married soon and I keep reminding her an indian man and her family can have immense levels of toxicity. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 08:21 PM |
| 3 | This is something to bear in mind. The devil doesn’t always come with horns and a pointy tail. Sometimes, he can come in the form of everything you’ve ever wanted.Yay good for you! Unfortunately this story is way too common, happened to me too. And it can happen again but we’ll just leave before it drains us | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 07:48 PM |
| 19 | This is something to bear in mind. The devil doesn’t always come with horns and a pointy tail. Sometimes, he can come in the form of everything you’ve ever wanted.It took me a while to realize that a guy can still do nice things for you and be a complete trash boyfriend. That a guy can be nice to old people, and minimize all your feelings. Now I am ready at any point to drop kick someone out of my life :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 06:57 PM |
| 22 | I could never repay my debt to FDS. Has it changed your life too?I LOVE that you mentioned the good things in your life, career, peace, way before you mention a man. He’s just a cherry on top :) good for you! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 02:58 PM |
| 3 | Feeling downI think what helps me is to focus on myself rather than the other person. The anger that comes from these situations can often lead to shame, that you should have done better left sooner. But that’s only hurting you. Focus on what in you allowed those behaviors, forgive yourself. Focus on all the ways you’re going to level up, maybe with your friend as accountability. Imagine alll that energy we often spent mulling over all the things that went wrong, and putting that into bettering and loving o… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 12:18 AM |
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