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divdec Archive

View 5 posts and 274 comments by divdec on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

lol no problem I like to be really thorough and I talk a lot idk if that's a good or a bad thing but anyway...grief is super normal. I still have random bouts of sadness even though I haven't even talked to my ex in months. it's really ok to feel sad as long as you overall stay focused on the glow up and creating the best single life possible. you're definitely right about not ignoring your feelings so cry when you're sad, but stay busy when you're not. it takes getting used to cos being single …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 01:20 AM
9

Right, the whole "he's just not that into you" advice makes me want to rip my hair out. I remember the first time I was having a conversation with a man about his behavior and how it reflected a deep dislike of himself and he just smiled, cocked his head and was like "what do you mean? I like myself!" Most men are unaware of what true self esteem means (hint: it's not egocentric domination and bulldozing over others' needs to get what you want). Men think they're fine going about life in the way…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 12:10 AM
2

ty!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 10:40 AM
3

Your subconscious mind is just replaying what's imprinted on it, it has no bias either way, it can't betray you, it's just showing you what you've been repeatedly feeding it. That's why I like positive affirmations so much. Feed yourself a new program to run on! It really works with consistency and repetition. and yeah, don't try to fix a man. fix yourself cos you're the only one you can control. the longer you're single and the more you focus your energy on yourself the less likely it is you wi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 10:40 AM
3

I'm here to help! Lol I was shocked to see that a post I made over a month ago was blowing up again, but I'm happy that my advice is reaching more women. I know personally how hard it is wanting to reach out to someone who hurt you bc you're bored or lonely, but I've expanded my social circle since my last breakup and now I feel like I'm in a position where I no longer need to rely on a man for validation. when we're in toxic relationships we tend to ignore all of the resources we're not utilizi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 10:05 AM
9

it's gonna be hard, but trust in the level up process. once you're leveled up physically and mentally, it's game over for the LVM. it's gonna hurt, and you're gonna feel sad, that's natural, but stay no contact with him and don't fall into the temptation to date again because you're bored or lonely. REALLY take this time to focus on yourself. go hit the gym hard, get new clothes, get your nails done, clean and organize your house, make yourself a warm soothing environment, drink water, take care…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 09:51 AM
3

it's not a boundary. your intuition is right. he's being a creep and a loser and stealing that vernacular to basically do whatever he wants. do yourself a favor and block that man on everything and let him have his e-girls. it doesn't matter why he likes them and you going crazy over it is just your ego trying to control the situation because you want him to be different. also, this is why I no longer send nudes to men and I'd highly recommend you stop as well for your own good. I hate to sound …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 09:45 AM
2

you're very welcome! I'm glad I could help you <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 08:43 PM
3

just like I said in a previous comment, it's not a waste of time, it's a valuable lesson. you'll never play yourself like you did before now. spend all your time leveling up and you'll be fucking amazed at what you can accomplish when you're not being drained by a LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 08:42 PM
2

on the bright side, you'll never make that mistake again. it wasn't a waste of time even though it may seem like it. it was a valuable lesson and now you'll be a thousand times LESS likely to fall for bs like that again. LVM move on fast cos they can't stand to be alone with their own insecurities. the best thing you can do now is stay single for a good while and really work on yourself and invest all your time and energy into leveling up. it's so worth it. I've done a complete 180 in the last f…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 08:42 PM
1

on the bright side, you'll never make that mistake again. it wasn't a waste of time even though it may seem like it. it was a valuable lesson and now you'll be a thousand times LESS likely to fall for bs like that again. LVM move on fast cos they can't stand to be alone with their own insecurities. the best thing you can do now is stay single for a good while and really work on yourself and invest all your time and energy into leveling up. it's so worth it. I've done a complete 180 in the last f…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 08:42 PM
7

yeah that's super gaslighty. it's public information and you're just using it to confirm what you already know to be true about him. it's ok to cry because you don't wanna hold in those feelings but defs cut contact w him and just stay single for a while and work on yourself babe. being single is an upgrade and highly enjoyable once you get used to it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 08:39 PM
12

DO NOT contact him no matter what you do. I know it's hard at first, but it gets easier I promise. my last ex was such a loser and I knew that logically, but I was so used to talking to him that it took every ounce of willpower I had not to reach out for the first month. some things that helped me to not call him were:crying a LOT, writing down every bad thing he ever did and every time I suspected him of cheating (I never officially caught him, but my intuition was screaming at me a few times),…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 08:37 PM
5

If women could fix men breakups would happen very rarely yet they happen all the time. It's sad that a lot of women never learn from their mistakes or think "it'll be different" with the next broken loser instead of just waiting until they find the right man or enjoy being single.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 08:28 PM
2

yeah you never wanna look like you're looking or hoping for a guy to approach you, super important. Men always want to feel like it was their idea. be totally fixated on something when you sense a man walking by, seriously. read the ingredients on a soup can label rather than smiling at a guy in the grocery store aisle. I made a whole post about emotional detachment not too long ago that you can read for more tips.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 10:11 PM
1

idk honestly I've never had problems getting approached, but I think it has more to do with the guy than you. If a guy is looking but not approaching he might have a gf/wife or just be too insecure to approach. You don't need to do anything, just look well groomed and well dressed. I've noticed that the less I notice men, the more likely they are to approach. Just dress up, wear makeup, do your hair, make sure you're in shape and look high value and let men do the rest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 09:25 PM
33

This is exactly why I’ve promised to myself to always listen to my intuition no matter how “paranoid” or “crazy” it makes me look. I can always tell when there’s something more going on between a guy and his “friend”. You dodged a bullet, seriously. Guys like that who need constant validation from women will never be able to work on themselves. They’re always bouncing from one girl to the next. He’s likely already looking for a backup in case it doesn’t work out with this one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 12:30 PM
2

You’re welcome! Writing them down has been really effective for some people. I’ve read that writing them helps because it gets your body involved and helps your brain remember them! Meditation can also really help because it’ll train you to slow down your thoughts and become more aware of them. Then when you catch yourself having a negative thought, instead of getting drawn into it, you can simply breathe and let it go. I’ve noticed meditation to be particularly helpful in my yoga practice becau…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 10:40 AM
3

I get that. Truly good friendships can be quite hard to come by and you can’t control how other people feel about you. External circumstances are very hard to control, but believe it or not, they actually have very little to do with your happiness. You can feel loved by loving yourself! You truly can be happy alone, I know it isn’t ideal, but you can’t make anyone do anything so you have to make the best of it. As I’ve grown older a lot of my friendships have faded away and I don’t have any fami…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 09:57 PM
6

You can increase your self esteem in a lot of ways. Your appearance doesn’t need to hinder you from having self esteem! There are many “unattractive” people with high self esteem and very “attractive” people who have low self esteem. It’s an inside job! I would really recommend trying positive affirmations for a few months. We get programmed into certain ways of thinking and we can literally brainwash ourselves into thinking more positively about ourselves. It takes a bit of time, but with consi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 09:45 PM
43

Because men view women as objects and status symbols. If you’re average looking, he’ll still have sex with you, but if you’re “hot” he’ll want to show you off to be like “look what I got”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 10:58 AM
22

They’re afraid that if they let him be by himself for an hour he’s gonna be watching porn, making a tinder account, breaking his thumbs liking pics of IG models, spending their rent money on only fans, hitting on their neighbor, and doing all the shit that they’re likely already doing behind their backs anyway. It gives them a false sense of control.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 10:53 AM
14

No. If you’re not exclusive it’s totally fine for a guy to be dating other women, but you should be dating other men too. And don’t sleep with him if he’s dating other women. Only sleep with a guy you’re exclusive with. Honestly the second you start getting all jealous and paranoid about a guy dating other women is when you make yourself look weak and pathetic. Your attitude should be “so? Lots of guys want me too.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 10:47 AM
16

Babe you are still young. You can get married and have kids well into your 30s and 40s. You have plenty of time. Also, going on tinder and saying there’s no good men left is like going to McDonald’s and saying there’s no healthy food in the entire world. It’s known for being a cheap, quick, low effort hookup app. Tinder and work are not the only places to meet men and you don’t need your girlfriends to go bar hopping with you to meet a decent man. I get asked out at the grocery store, the post o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 10:38 AM
10

I get where you’re coming from, but as others have said it’s not really a smart idea to date potential. Tbh it sounds like you’re already making excuses for him which is never a good sign. You say 21 is young enough to not have to “have it all together” and yet you’re the same age and have a great career already. Think about that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 01:05 AM
44

Realize that by being single you have complete control over your life. When you’re dating, anything could happen. The guy could be secretly married, he could cheat on you, ghost you, give you an STD, abuse you, etc. Think about why all your past relationships have failed and ask yourself if you really want to go through that again or if you’d rather enjoy a peaceful period of your life for yourself for a little while. When you’re single you have a whole world of possibilities. You could get a ne…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 04:43 PM
9

Once when I was in middle school I was chatting with my friends on AOL instant messenger in a public library. A guy I didn’t even see apparently walked by me, saw my screen name, and started messaging me. It was SUPER creepy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 03:05 PM
27

You’re welcome! We all make mistakes! You’ll get there, it just takes some time and adjusting your mentality. We’re socialized to put everyone’s needs before our own so don’t beat yourself up for literally just doing what you’ve been told is the right thing to do since birth. There are STILL people out there giving so much bad dating advice to women that don’t take into consideration that men operate on a completely different program than we do. I see shit like “if he doesn’t text you for a week…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 01:35 PM
63

I had a coworker tell me I was gonna “end up alone” when I broke up with a dude who blew me off to hang out with his friends instead of going to an event that I had bought tickets for and told him about weeks prior. I’ve wasted plenty of time thinking a man could “change for me,” but never has it crossed my mind that I should lower my expectations of men and just accept that shitty behavior is a standard part of a relationship. don’t want an award for self sacrifice! I’d rather be happy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/20 04:41 PM
18

Good points “if you have to get crafty and cunning to get him to stick around it’s not gonna work” lmao sooo true like don’t bend over backwards to keep a relationship going. She’s right that men do know really quickly who they’re gonna marry and it’s never the girl who’s playing games trying to strategize to get him to like her. It’s the girl who is hard to get by her nature because she’s busy and self absorbed, not the girl who plays hard to get but is not so secretly a pickmeisha whose entire…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/20 12:20 PM
64

BLOCK. You deserve better. You are wasting your energy on this arrogant, rude loser.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/20 11:54 AM
36

She’s spent “over $400 a few times” for their “relationship milestones”? No wonder he got her a lava lamp, she’s basically acting like his mom “I love you no matter what you do :) here’s a new PlayStation sweetie!!” HVM do not need nor want expensive gifts from their girlfriends. Seriously. Get him socks. Get him a book. You do not need to buy a man’s love.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/20 11:50 AM
12

Someone needs to write a guide for pick mes called “you’re his girlfriend, not his mom” that teaches you how to stop taking pity on LVM and taking care of them. If your man can’t prioritize spending his money between wants and needs, you have a son.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/20 11:25 AM
11

PLEASE rid yourself of the idea that 3 months is a long time to wait for sex. It’s not. It’s really normal. You still barely know someone after 3 months. If a LVM drops off the radar because you didn’t have sex with him, consider it a blessing! Someone who prioritizes marriage will be absolutely perturbed if you sleep with him sooner. Also, please stop thinking that men “need to get laid”. They don’t! We have been brainwashed by red pill and LVM to think that sex is a necessity. Not all men have…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/20 09:45 AM
66

Tbh I don’t know any HVM that would want to continue a conversation that late anyway or put you in the position to wait in the first place. It’s always the LVM that have no respect for your time and no etiquette around which hours they text you, a HVM wouldn’t say “I’ll text you at 11pm” he would say “I’ll text you tomorrow, have a good evening” no respectable man expects a woman to wait up for his text past midnight that’s ridiculous.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 11:10 AM
84

There are way more married/guys in a relationship out there acting single than you think! Another reason to hold off on sex for 3 months.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 10:57 AM
13

I ghost every guy that suggests a “brewery” as a date.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/20 04:12 PM
25

Has he donated any money, signed any petitions, gone to any protests, called/written any politicians? Performative empathy and virtue signaling is so transparent and annoying, yet this guy probably think he’s earning soooo many points despite the fact that you literally told him to stop. I can’t.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/20 10:01 AM
13

Women can look good at any age. This lady said she started her health and fitness journey right when she was supposed to be hitting “the wall” lmao now look at her!!! There’s tons of old ladies in my yoga classes that still look great. Every time I’m at the gym I see lots of fit looking older people and the more you work out its less likely you’ll get wrinkles and stuff. I exercise almost everyday and have for most of my life. I don’t see myself suddenly gaining 50 pounds out of nowhere and beco…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 05:35 PM
3

Nice!! Congrats on freeing yourself from a bad relationship and quitting smoking!!! Both are huge feats, you should feel very proud.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 04:46 PM
4

Definitely. It’s all projection. They have a short term goal for us (sex) so they think we must have an ulterior motive to get their money! If that were the case women would never sleep with these losers to begin with, we would have a different guy taking us out to dinner every night of the week
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 04:42 PM
5

Right when I think of an alpha man I don’t picture a literal predator whose ears perk up when a woman divulges one of her insecurities.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 04:25 PM
12

Right, no FDSer would try to “run game” on a man who won’t ask her on a date. He says “if she insists” as if we’d be sitting there begging for him to take us out. He seems more like the type of guy I would block after him saying “come over and chill”. Probably has a dirty mattress with no bed frame. He should be mad at himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 04:18 PM
1

All I hear is “I’m broke as hell and scared of rejection and I blame everyone else for why my life sucks”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 04:04 PM
8

LOVE this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 03:58 PM
16

I can relate and I see this in a lot of other women who are confident but don’t love themselves. People with serious issues can be very confident because confidence means you believe in your abilities, not your worth. I can know I am able to do something and still hate myself. A lot of high achievers are like this. Same reason we fall for LVM who appear to be confident. They’re confident they can hook you in and play you, but they don’t love you or themselves. A person with healthy self esteem n…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 03:54 PM
4

Honestly, I find it hard not to keep my distance from her these days for a few reasons. I don’t want to go to her house at the risk that her husband will be there because he’s just so childish and unbearable and it hurts my heart to see her with him. She’s so accomplished and incredible and she really just loves the crap out of this toxic manchild who spews hate everywhere he goes. I noticed I also kinda fell out with her when my relationship with my now ex LVM started to get really draining, I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 11:31 PM
8

You’re definitely not trash, but you do have a responsibility to avoid men when they’re treating you that way or you’re always gonna feel like trash. These men have their own issues to deal with, it’s really not personal I promise you. Everything someone does is because they look at the world through the lens of their own experiences. I was watching a video on YouTube from Sadhguru and he was talking about how if you give someone a gift they’re not ready for they’re going to ruin it and he liken…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 11:12 PM
13

You’re welcome! That’s exactly why I wrote this post! The hardest ones to get over are the ones who would be perfect if they just changed like one or two things. They’re so great in the beginning, you have amazing chemistry, you fall in love and then next thing you know you’re stuck in a miserable relationship. Unfortunately women are fed this stupid lie that we can “change” men or that he would change himself if we were “the one”. I’ve learned that for men there is no “one”. Women are generally…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:44 PM
14

True! Online dating is a cesspool, but you can weed out a LOT of men quickly. The last time I did OLD was during my pick me phase, but even then I wouldn’t meet a guy if he didn’t ask me out on a proper date (no meeting for drinks or a coffee or the WORST: “going for a hike”) and most men are willing to at least take you to dinner. My standards have always been somewhere in the middle and I met a lot of LVM trash, but it was good practice and really helped me get over the losers quicker cos I wa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:26 PM
7

Lmao I was kidding too don’t worry. I would never encourage someone to stay with a LVM and ruin their life. I had a friend who would constantly complain to me about her loser LVM alllll the time and I was always like “dump him. Dump him right now. You can come live with me” and she’d defend him and make all kinds of excuses cos they lived together and had a dog. She would keep bringing it up and complaining about it and my advice was always the same. It was sooooooo frustrating. I eventually jus…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:04 PM
8

Omfg it wouldn’t happen if they just stopped perpetuating this absolutely disgusting, abusive, deranged practice altogether. Even if there were a “safe” way to choke someone, the typical LVM is not going to bother learning about it. Do men spend time learning about a woman’s needs in any other area of dating or sex? Hardly. Men don’t even want to wear condoms. I know the kinkmeishas trying to “educate” everyone on their sickening degenerate lifestyles mean well, but they live in a fantasy world …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 08:01 PM
8

I wish I could do this to all my ex’s dating profiles. They blatantly lie about so much sh*t. I also saw an ex lying about his age on tinder it’s so fucking predatory!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 07:47 PM
24

There are women that are “into” some pretty brutal impact play. There are tons of BDSM pages on IG with women showing off their bruises and scars from scenes. It is very disturbing. People will fight tooth and nail to defend their “kinks” but anyone with a modicum of understanding of psychology can see that it’s a neurosis.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 07:41 PM
168

Once I dated (more like babysat) particularly stupid manchild and we were having an argument cos he wanted me to stop raising my voice when I wanted him to do something. I said “you don’t listen to me unless I yell” so he agreed to listen to me before I started yelling. So the next day we have to go somewhere and I’m like “ok let’s go!” And he’s like “yep” and keeps laying on the couch. I say to him in a very calm voice “this is exactly what I mean when I say you don’t listen unless I raise my v…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 07:35 PM
8

Oh, all right fine let him ruin your life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 04:51 PM
47

I know of a few ppl IRL that are poly and the most hilarious thing is that the men usually get so much less action than their female partners and they get soooo butthurt about it. If you’re a guy and you already have a “primary partner” other girls don’t want her table scraps unless they’re really desperate, but girls can have 3-4 boyfriends easily. I wouldn’t do it personally but it is hilarious to see the guys being all like “i can’t be monogamous! We have to be poly or else...wait no not like…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 02:21 PM
32

“He wasn’t manipulative he just got violently angry whenever I did something wrong and triangulated me with an underage pickmeisha” this dude sounds like a real prize. She should totally go talk it out with him /s.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 01:23 PM
65

Omg congrats girl!!!! I hope you sucked his d*ck at least 12 times for that and paid your half cos that ring looks pretty expensive!!! Good for you though, happy for you!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 01:16 PM
107

Ummmm where did you find this pic of my ex?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 01:14 PM
4

Holy sh*t same with my recent ex! He said I was his first gf in 10 years! I can’t believe there’s even more losers like him out there. He was the grand finale of my life long pick me phase. I can’t believe I twisted that red flag into a bow thinking “oh wow I must be REALLY special then”. All my IRL friends are pick mes so I had nobody around to slap some sense into me. A man who only keeps “friends with benefits” around for 10 years ain’t gonna change, that’s 10 years of objectifying women he b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 12:58 PM
8

It’s no problem at all! Rant away! And feel free to message me if you need someone to talk to. It is VERY hard to break out of an abusive situation and I’m very proud of you for the massive strides you are making. Men will use ALL sorts of tactics to manipulate us and put us in a weak position. Save your money and don’t let yourself rely on a man financially or emotionally. Again, a partner should never take up that much headspace. You need to take steps to ensure that you will always be support…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 12:03 PM
5

I think it’s quite unlikely that a dude you met on tinder will go through all the trouble of having his friends text you. He’s on tinder, he’s probably talking to like 13 other girls. If he does have his friends text you, which again, seems unlikely to me, that’s considered harassment and you could take legal action against him. I understand your concerns so I don’t want to sound cold, but I can’t picture a guy going to his friends and saying “dude this girl blocked me can you message her for me…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 11:48 AM
10

Men know how easily they can control our emotions with the simplest neg. OP shouldn’t be worried about how to be more “balanced” it’s clear he’s just gotten under her skin. OP, the next time a dude says something like that to you, be aware that he’s purposely trying to make you doubt yourself. You don’t sound unbalanced to me, he’s trying to control you. Seriously don’t let these guys get under your skin. They’re insecure and dumb.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 11:39 AM
3

Yeah it’s easy for women to get obsessive over guys cos every movie we watch and magazine we read is all about how to get guys. You can’t change their mentality. You just have to say “talk to me when you’re done fooling yourself”. Not every woman is going to want better for themselves and you just have to accept that. Some women think that they really can’t do better. It’s sad, but you’re wasting your time trying to convince her. If she can’t see it now maybe she needs to get hurt and played a f…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 11:36 AM
15

First of all, you shouldn’t be “seeing a future” with someone you’ve only been dating for a few weeks. You need to stop putting fantasies in your mind about the guys you see because this leads to disappointment WAYYYYYY more often than a real relationship coming to fruition. A man should not take up much headspace for the first few months of dating. See him when he asks you out, text him back when he texts you, answer when he calls you, but while you’re not talking to him you need to be busy wit…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 11:32 AM
6

Sometimes you just gotta let go. I had a friend who married a guy who punched holes in her wall. I would have hours long conversations with her about how she could do better but she stayed. I would say very firmly that you’re not going to listen to her complain about this guy anymore if she’s not gonna cut him off. Tell her one last time that he’s gonna keep treating her like shit and she needs to move on and this is the last discussion you’re having about him and if she continues to get her hea…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 11:24 AM
2

I’ve noticed this too half of their bios and “pick up lines” are copied and pasted from something else. I called one guy out on his pickup line and denied it like bro, you think I’m dumb enough not to know how to google? OLD always frustrated me cos I’d put a good bit of effort into my profile saying what my interests were and these scrotes think they can sweep me off my feet with a stolen joke that isn’t even funny
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 11:18 AM
32

Age gap? Red flag. “Wrong guy” passive aggressive message after only 30 mins?!!! Sounds like by “balanced” he meant someone who will give him nonstop attention. The “wrong guy” comment made me cringe so hard, he’s obviously already insecure about you talking to other people so just please dump this loser and move on with your life. He is an imbecile and there is no reason why a woman who’s working hard for a future and has her whole life ahead of her should settle for an already divorced with ki…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 11:13 AM
65

“You look like a lesbian” “Showing off your guns” Fragile masculinity alert! He’s afraid chicks are gonna want you more than him. This isn’t the first time I’ve heard of a man being intimidated by queer women. They want everything to be about them. How sad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 11:06 AM
24

It’s a cope. They know you’re gonna be fine. A good rule of thumb is the more a man tries to hurt you, the more butthurt he is so if he flat out insults you like that you can basically guarantee he’s crying himself to sleep every night.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 11:01 AM
26

He said you OWED him??? Over a $12 check?!?!!? Uhhhhhhhh....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 10:55 AM
3

LMAO facts I was so grossed out by that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 10:53 AM
37

All the kinkmeishas in the comments saying this is too much because “kinks should be fun things” are SO. DELUSIONAL.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 10:43 AM
38

Yepperrrrrrr many psychopaths conflate violence with sexual fantasies this man is 1000000000000000000% a psychopath! I’m scared for her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 10:37 AM
34

I had to read this like 5 times and I still have no fucking clue what he’s trying to say. Men are deranged.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 10:27 AM
31

Wtf for $4?!?!!? My jaw dropped when I read that. How was he not embarrassed?????? LVM have nothing to offer but audacity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 10:23 AM
12

People don’t do a full 180 as much as it may appear on the outside. Your ex was always a bad dude, you just trusted him because you’d never had any reason not to trust someone like that. The good news is once you’ve dealt with a narcissist, when you encounter another one you’ll start to get this creepy “I’ve been here before” feeling. But honey if you’re scared to date, you don’t have to!!!! Truly! You don’t have to date EVER. I would recommend staying single until you’ve fully recovered from th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 10:08 AM
5

Nope you’re not alone. LVM and their painful insecurities are everywhere. You’re welcome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:54 AM
3

Lol! “You want him to help you but he needs help himself” should be on a freaking billboard. Men RARELY admit that they need help so we wonder what’s wrong with US for not being able to change them. And yeah, people probably told him he’d be an amazing dad cos they don’t live with him and you got to see how he really was and reminded him that he had a long way to go. Unfortunately, this never pans out the way we expect it to. We think by trying to encourage them it’ll make them rise to the occas…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:51 AM
7

The point of this post wasn’t that only broke guys are LVM. The point was it’s insecurity and thought patterns that lead to LV behavior so ANY insecurity left unchecked will have a negative effect on your relationship. Men are insecure but they don’t know how to deal with their insecurities so they see it as a reason to sabotage a relationship because they think they won’t be good enough for it anyway. I used being broke as an example because it’s usually what LVM are the most butthurt about, bu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:44 AM
9

Yep! People only change when they make a conscious effort to. I read that something like 70% of the thoughts you have are the same everyday. Your thinking patterns determine your behavior so if you don’t change the way you think you can’t change how you act.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:27 AM
7

Yeah I’ve learned to take it as a warning sign when they say that because it’s not them trying to flatter you at all. It’s a cop out so they can be like “sEe? I tOLd yOu I wAsn’T gOoD eNoUgh!” When a man tells you “you’re too good for me” it doesn’t mean he thinks he’s lucky to have you, it means get out while you can cos I thoroughly intend to disappoint you and I’m not gonna do anything about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:25 AM
34

Exactly. Men only care about what they can get from you. They don’t care if you respond positively or negatively; they just want the validation from the response.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 12:34 AM
7

LOLLLL 3 years ago I was still a pick me. I have evolved. And I’m pretty sure everyone on FDS dated your ex and that’s how we all ended up here 😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 12:25 AM
76

They don’t care about you, they care about whether or not they have access to you. They care about whether or not YOU care about them still. When questioning the behavior of a LVM I find it helps me to look for the benefits and drawbacks for THEM in any given situation. He treats you like shit and you put up with it? Ego boost. He treats you like shit and you yell at him? Ego boost. He treats you like shit and you ignore him? “Whaaaattttt????? She doesn’t care about me still? I thought she would…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 10:55 PM
7

💀
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 10:48 PM
1

Yup if you’re dependent on them in any way they know they control you. I will never care about a man enough to become emotionally dependent on him ever again. I won’t give another man the benefit of the doubt, if he fucks up, I walk away. And as for the D/s dynamics, you cannot convince me that a man would give up any form of control other than physical. I had a stint in the BDSM realm and even subby guys want everything to be about them. They may give up physical control and put on performative…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 10:07 PM
11

Haha I can relate I verbally destroyed my ex’s whole life when we broke up. I spent the next couple weeks wondering if I was the toxic one in the relationship lmao! Now I know that they don’t care so the best way to fuck with their head is to care even less, say nothing, walk away, and ignore them when they inevitably come back around looking for a second chance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 09:51 PM
4

Omg I just cackled at this so loud 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 08:57 PM
15

“Let’s decide spontaneously” oh barf. 2 perfectly time blocks, not a moment too soon.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 08:54 PM
8

https://www.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/gstoal/why_what_he_spends_matters/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf read my discussion in the comments with u/travelhag66 she explains it beautifully. Men derive most of their sense of self worth from what others men think of them because it determines their “status” in life. Men don’t care about what we think because we’re nothing more than “status symbols” to them. Basically, men are just engulfed by their own egos and o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 08:40 PM
3

Thank you! I’m glad you enjoyed ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 08:37 PM
8

You’re welcome! Glad I could give you some clarity. He acts like an asshole cos you’re shining a floodlight on all the things he hoped you wouldn’t notice or care about. We see it as trying to be helpful, but in his mind you might as well be a nagging mother telling him for the umpteenth time to pick up his dirty socks. He knows about the dirty socks, but he’s too lazy to do anything about it and he wished you’d get off his back so he can go back to playing video games. He’s a manchild and it ai…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 08:36 PM
12

TL;DR: toxic masculinity and internalized misogyny. There’s a book called “why women are blamed for everything”. Women get blamed for their own abuse all the time so eventually it gets hammered into our brains to assume blame in any situation. A less traumatizing example I have of this is getting detention in the 5th grade because I yelled at a boy who was throwing paper at me. He didn’t get in trouble. I was supposed to just keep my cool apparently. Women are socialized in many societies to be …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 07:59 PM
4

True! Nothing you can do can stop a man from cheating, but you can definitely always respond with dignity. I don’t care if I have a man’s baby, if he cheats on me I will kick his ass out or pack my sh*t and take the kids with me. I will never be afraid to walk away from a man. Never. I will always have my own income and maintain myself so he knows I’m still a catch that could replace his ass in seconds til I’m 75 years old.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 07:18 PM
5

Thank you! I hope you find CBT useful. Reading about cognitive distortions helped me immensely. Self mastery is a worthwhile process.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 06:24 PM
29

Yes, women need to know that men don’t change because they’re insecure and afraid of change, not because the woman isn’t “wife material”. Women don’t realize that men are insecure because they act like they don’t care, but deep down MEN ARE VERY INSECURE. The “fragile male ego” line gets tossed around, but women still seem to think that a man is happy stomping around and ruining lives. He’s not happy! He looks happy, but he is miserable, sad, lonely, thinks he’s completely unworthy, and unlovabl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 06:21 PM
14

You’re welcome! We all have fears, doubt, and insecurities. What makes the difference between low value and high value is what you do with your fear. You can make an excuse or you can believe in yourself and say I’m going to win no matter what. It’s easy to make excuses. That’s why the vast majority of people never live up to their potential. Our brains our wired to seek comfort and stability. Our egos will play tricks on us to maintain the status quo. I use CBT and DBT techniques to examine my …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 06:05 PM
18

You’re so welcome! I have no doubt you were a good gf. Most women are incredibly loyal and giving and we end up damaged cos these losers walk all over us. I really wanted to drive home the point that no matter what you do a LVM will always be a LVM. Men don’t suddenly wake up and realize you’re the one and change their behavior. They’ll shit all over you and then respect you even less because you forgave them for shitting on you. I am TIRED of these losers and I want to put an end to their games…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 05:47 PM
10

Stay woke, girl. When he thinks of you it’s only cos he’s looking for validation and a distraction from himself. You’re welcome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 05:39 PM
7

Oh yeah, all kinds of red flags there. My definition of a LVM is a man who doesn’t feel he needs to do any work to improve himself or his relationships. Many LVM have things that fall into their laps and assume that’s how everything should be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 05:03 PM
13

Yupppp all kinds of LVM out there. The same concept applies about it all boiling down to insecurity. They miss out on having a deep meaningful relationship and then refuse to do the work on themselves to fix it. They’re afraid of being honest and accountable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 04:33 PM
4

You’re welcome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 04:22 PM
13

Yay I’m so glad this resonated I was worried I was drawing too much from personal experience buuuut I guess there’s always plenty of LVM around to learn from! You’re very welcome!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 03:58 PM
16

Yup they’re all insecure in their own special little ways!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 03:36 PM
11

Thanks for the idea! I could have written a paragraph on everyone’s posts individually about their insecure loser LVM situations, but this is my gift to everyone lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 03:35 PM
16

Wow I feel called out lmao. I remember having arguments with my ex about him flirting with other women constantly and gaslighting me and then he’d do like...3 nice things. Rinse, repeat for 6 months til I finally realized yanno what I can probably find a guy that does all these nice things without all the blatant disrespect lol. The cognitive dissonance is real.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 03:29 PM
32

Right, the purpose of this post wasn’t just to shit on broke dudes. The message I was trying to convey way that you can’t change the way a man THINKS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 03:13 PM
13

Tyyy!!!!! 😘😘😘
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 03:00 PM
19

You tried your best and you learned a lesson you will never forget. A 5 year relationship with a blame shifting, suicidal, narcissist takes quite a toll on your wellbeing so I’m glad you have the wherewithal to consider that there are others like him rather than re-entering the dating scene thinking “this one will be different!” So many women have had similar experiences with men and we can’t wrap our heads around how they could be so awful, but we need to stop thinking we can change them. We ca…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 02:59 PM
29

You’re definitely right about that! I could write a whole dissertation about the many kinds of LVM but this post was already getting so freaking long I decided to just focus on the main culprits and the patterns in their self sabotaging ways, but definitely any man can be a LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 02:41 PM
4

You’re welcome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 02:32 PM
25

Shit, even pickmeisha wants some effort. The only reason pickmeisha tries so hard is cos she thinks it’ll make him reciprocate and when he doesn’t she gets rightfully angry. She might not leave, but he’ll give him enough headaches. LVM keep going after the next one thinking it’ll be different not realizing they’re the common denominator with all of these “crazy” women. Its satisfying to know that no matter how much sex he gets, sooner than later the woman will be nagging him and hounding him for…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 02:31 PM
4

I’m not surprised! I’m definitely following that sub now!!! Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 02:20 PM
12

On it!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 12:37 PM
60

Right! A man will put his best foot forward in a relationship cos all he sees is a beautiful woman, but when he spends more time with you and realizes how smart you are he has an “oh sh*t” moment in his head wondering how long it’s gonna take for you to realize he’s trash. So most women assume that the way he acts in the beginning is how things are gonna stay, BUT that man has already checked out from the relationship and started looking for other options and starts putting in less effort. We wh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 12:36 PM
15

Gross. Block, delete, next. Now you know how he truly feels about women and the fact that he stopped liking your photos once he “got” you is such an obvious manipulation. Men are VERY aware that their ability to give and take away validation has an effect on our emotions. And the “bitchy” comment? UGH. Ew. No.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 11:53 AM
11

I agree 150%. I grew up thinking porn was completely fine and normal because I figured men are more sexual than us so they “need” an outlet. I’m grateful that I can see it for what it is now and porn consumption is at the top of my dealbreaker/red flag list. Porn hurts women and mentally, physically, and emotionally handicaps men. I will NEVER be ok with it. Porn destroys lives and relationships.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 11:44 AM
14

I never actually dated a man who acted on any urges towards underage girls to my knowledge, but I can see through the thinly veiled fixation with “barely legal” porn and I am acutely aware of how common it is for men to have pedophilic fantasies. I’ve been in age gap relationships (before I knew better) and after breaking up with one of them I saw on his IG that he started following a page with overtly sexual photos of “teen models” and since it wasn’t porn I can’t be sure that they are all of l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 11:26 AM
169

It has nothing to do with the woman. Most men cannot even step up their game for themself. Most men cannot validate themselves, motivate themselves, hold themselves accountable, care for themselves, love themselves, etc. The reason men let a good woman go is bc you’re expecting him to do something for you that he cannot even do for himself. I wish so badly that every woman could see past the front that men put on. A man can act very confident, but the reason he treats you like trash is because h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 10:59 AM
24

Men don’t give me butterflies, just straight up anxiety. I now assume that most men are secretly liars, cheaters, manipulators, porn addicts, misogynists, and low key pedophiles. I’m not ready to date and won’t be for a long time. I want to be at the point where I don’t feel the least bit excited if a man asks me out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 10:29 AM
20

Same mine would make fun of me for dating another loser (spoiler: the men she dates aren’t much better!) the internalized misogyny in my family is real.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 01:48 AM
63

3 outfits and daddy issues lmaoooooo ok that one felt a little too personal 😂😂😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 01:45 AM
20

LMAO!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 12:03 AM
50

“His arms have to hurt” 💀
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 12:02 AM
17

A man should want to take care of a woman even when he knows she’s fully capable of taking care of herself. Most women can take care of themselves perfectly fine so “taking care of herself” should not have to be stated as a requirement. WE DON’T NEED YOU.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 12:00 AM
44

It’s a harsh reality to face. Even though I had it drilled into my head to be cautious of men from a young age, I still gave the benefit of the doubt to “nice” guys. Women’s heads would explode if they knew men’s true thoughts. My head exploded when I started watching the Shera videos, coming to this sub, and exploring the redpill and incel subs. I explained some of the things I’ve learned to my friends and THEIR heads exploded. If all women knew the truth the world would be a very different pla…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 11:47 PM
1

Shera’s videos are on point no matter what cos men don’t change at all as they age. They just get older and uglier and have fewer options. Shera is so freaking smart I love her!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 11:29 PM
13

Once I’m financially stable enough to move into a new place I am totally getting a dog for companionship! I do wish my cat were a bit more cuddly, but her lukewarm indifference still beats a LVM! I’d rather take care of a slug than a LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 09:18 PM
34

If your goal is a monogamous, committed relationship that will lead to marriage, keep a rotation of guys UNTIL you find one worthy enough of being in a relationship with you and then you should date him exclusively. It should be a LONG, as in, MONTHS long process before you get to exclusivity. It takes a long time to build trust and determine if someone is a HVM. Do not be in a hurry to commit. Some men will push for exclusivity early on to trap you into a relationship and make you cut off all y…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 08:40 PM
1

I just looked it up, it doesn’t look like there’s on in my area but I appreciate the thought anyway ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 08:03 PM
9

My parents weren’t this extreme, but towards the middle of high school my stepdad started going on these tirades about me “pulling my own weight”. This was right at the start of the recession so finding a job was impossible. I applied to over a hundred places and being a high school student with no experience, I had no luck. I would constantly get yelled at for not being able to find a job despite unemployment rates skyrocketing. They’d act like something was wrong with me. I think like 2 out of…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 07:28 PM
1

The only reason she advises against dating in your age range is because her channel is advice for gold diggers. Dating older men is wise advice for gold diggers. She has no interest in being with someone her age because they can’t support her financially. She’s said over and over she doesn’t care about love or dating a man who looks good, she’s only in it for money. You have to decide what you want out of a relationship and adjust your strategy accordingly. She IS right that younger men are imma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 06:41 PM
44

I don’t see anything wrong with being a single cat lady tbh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 05:53 PM
2

I am no longer a sucker for apologies after I learned that most men have the “I would rather apologize than ask permission” attitude. These men actively choose to disrespect women knowing they can apologize later. An apology from a man is rarely the product of regret and self reflection; it is a pre-planned strategy to keep you on a leash.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 05:44 PM
3

Gooooood call! Writing that down now, thank you for the advice!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 05:39 PM
4

I would advise strongly against hooking up with other guys if you’re not over your ex. You could instead try going on nonsexual dates with several men to remind yourself how many options there are in the world, but please avoid sleeping with someone when you’re emotionally vulnerable, it only makes it easier for them to hurt you and take advantage. Definitely spend more time with friends and spend time on your hobbies! Keeping hobbies and building new skills will build up your self esteem. Keepi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 05:38 PM
3

I’m doing as many of the free programs as I can find. I’m considering the boot camp if I hit a dead end, but you’re definitely right. I have a bunch of tutorials saved and I have had no problems with the free resources thus far!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 05:27 PM
21

We’re socialized to fear being seen as “rude” so that’s why my new strategy is to make them feel like they’re being the rude ones even if you have to act a bit dramatic be like “are you serious?? You said we were getting drinks! This is only my FIRST time meeting you in person!” Shame him loudly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 05:24 PM
11

Thanks I appreciate the encouragement! I’m making steady progress with it. I’ve set out a plan to keep progressing and my parents have offered to help me pay for a boot camp. It does get overwhelming, but I’m not giving up. There are endless possibilities for jobs so I just keep reminding myself to focus on the end goal when I get frustrated. I’ve been selling myself short with entry level jobs (retail, waitressing, bartending) my whole life so it feels good to be learning a skill that’ll earn m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 05:12 PM
50

Ugh I was just thinking today about how much time I’ve completely wasted on men. I’ve just started learning computer programming which has been awesome and I’m excited about it, but it’s going to take a VERY long time and a lot of studying and practice before I can get good enough at it that I can get a job as a software programmer. I WISH I could go back to when I started dating and just skip it all together. I did learn valuable lessons from my failed relationships with LVM, but I’ve been a se…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 04:44 PM
3

I use the advice she gives with men my age. I take notes on her videos and use what applies to my situations such as: don’t date for looks, don’t fall for words ONLY actions, date someone less attractive than you, don’t tell a man how much money you make, always look good when you see him, tell him how you want to be treated (tell him what restaurants you like, what gifts you want, etc), don’t text him first, be super nice when you’re around him but be busy and less responsive when you’re apart,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 04:29 PM
112

THIS THIS THIS. It’s very uncommon to find a man that doesn’t want to “keep his options open” even while in a relationship. Once I dated a guy who I had a similar funny feeling about and found his dating profile with pictures I had taken of him on it! You’re not alone and his behavior has nothing to do with you. Men don’t see anything wrong with this so you gotta play defensive strategies by keeping YOUR options open. Don’t expect men to play fair, they never do. Date as many men as possible and…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 04:08 PM
18

Oh I’ve seen this article before or a similar one. It’s like a biological defense mechanism so they don’t miss a mating opportunity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 11:44 AM
35

Oof good point. In the past I would’ve been the “cool girl” about it and been like “oh totally have fun!” Without realizing I’m basically setting myself up to be a doormat and then wondering later why he never prioritizes me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 10:37 AM
7

💔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/20 03:46 PM
3

Shera is amazing! I love how her advice whenever someone asks about this is “get another one”. “This guy won’t return my calls what do I do?” “Get another one” “what do I do if my boyfriend cheated on me?” “Get another one” “my boyfriend doesn’t want to get married” “get another one”. Don’t stay hung up on one guy, get another one!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/20 10:50 AM
1

I didn’t say “vulnerable loser” I said she was vulnerable which should indicate that I was ALSO empathizing with her. I was insinuating HE saw it as an opportunity to take advantage of her by offering her financial aid in a time of need. I clearly stated that I figured his inspiration for his sudden generosity was more sex. I was speaking from the man’s point of view and how often they do “nice” things that are actually predatory as hell because it “earns them more sex”. I was taking the woman’s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/20 09:17 AM
2

So clearly he’s not the type of guy to just volunteer help and men don’t do a complete 180 without persuasion. Sounds like he’s getting rinsed lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/20 12:34 AM
2

EWWWWW. That’s his idea of a GIFT??? I hope you dumped him right then and there. Reminds me of the time I dumped a guy on Christmas (we had been fighting for weeks beforehand) when we agreed to meet up to exchange presents. He was spewing all this crap about trying to be better for me and when I showed up at his house he has this photo frame box (that was clearly bought at a thrift store or something?) that had obvious wear on it, he said he was planning on sanding it and painting it for me but …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/20 12:03 AM
3

No, you’re not reading too much into it. He said it would be “hard” to keep a distance from you-obvious flirting. The kissy emojis-obvious flirting. 6 hour dinners? Girllllll. If you have to maintain a professional relationship with this man, honestly, I would just fucking lie and say I got a boyfriend or something and fade out. If he’s in a higher position than you he could try to fuck with your career. You already know intuitively this man is up to no good so why keep entertaining him with tex…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 11:50 PM
3

Realize that you CAN and WILL reach a point (if you stay single long enough) where you are happy by yourself and that’s when you hold all the power in dating and life. Start doing things NOW that will benefit you in the future like learning some sort of skill, a language, hobby, whatever, just start trying new things and find 3-5 things that you love doing. I HIGHLY recommend meditation everyday, the benefits are absolutely out of this world-check out r/meditation. Definitely stay active in this…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 11:42 PM
7

UGH good point. That’s probably why he can’t even bring himself to break up with her, he’s hoping SHE’LL change so he doesn’t have to risk getting rejected 400 times in a row by women who resemble his fantasy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 10:34 PM
2

The MAJORITY of men are immature in all age groups. There are also mature men within all age groups they’re just a very very very small percentage and you have to know how to play your cards right to weed out the fakes. Be selective, have high standards, know how to say NO, and most importantly never be afraid to WALK AWAY and BLOCK.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 09:51 PM
2

Been there, done that, wouldn’t recommend. Men who date 10-15 years younger are soooooooooo predatory. They have so much experience lying and manipulating women that you won’t even realize what’s happening until it’s too late.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 09:39 PM
10

Realize how painfully insecure most men are. Seriously. Once you understand how much men front and act cool to get you to like them and how DEEPLY insecure they are inside, you won’t be a fan. You’ll realize that they’re just a normal person. Also, by putting YOURSELF on the pedestal and making them come to you. Don’t initiate contact, don’t ask men on dates, don’t give men excessive compliments, don’t fantasize about them, just don’t give them your energy. Sit back, watch what they do, ignore w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 09:24 PM
3

To be blunt, you’re not ready to date until you’ve dealt with your fear of rejection. HE should be trying to impress YOU. You can’t go into a date being nervous and scared. Men can smell your insecurity from a mile away and at best they’ll reject you, at worst they’ll use it to manipulate you. Remember, you don’t NEED a man for ANYTHING. Love yourself. Put yourself first. Take care of yourself. Work towards your goals, hobbies, career, friendships, and all the life experiences you want to create…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 09:17 PM
4

The YouTuber mindful attraction did a video about using Rihanna as an example of how to talk to men cos her voice is naturally low and confident and gives off bad bitch energy. Men def notice when you’re putting on a show for them-it doesn’t make them like you more, they just think haha I got her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 08:54 PM
4

Agree. 99.9% of men are trash, but I haven’t met enough of them to assume that there are ZERO HVM in existence. Some men realize that blind lust is a weakness that distracts them from their goals. Some men realize the addictive nature of consuming porn and actively avoid it just like they avoid junk food and video games. I browse the r/nofap and r/selfimprovement subs and I see men coming to the realization that consuming porn has had a very negative effect on their relationships and sex lives. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 08:47 PM
9

The second one was such a red flag for me with my ex. He love bombed heavy in the beginning and when his response to a photo of myself or me sharing something I accomplished that day dwindled down to a single emoji I knew it was his insecurity making it impossible for him to be happy for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 08:27 PM
7

This. Men who pry about your previous relationships are just looking for shit to use against you. Don’t volunteer any information and if he asks why you’re single or whatever say you never dated anyone seriously yet because you were focused on school and your career and that you and your ex ended on good terms, but neither of you were ready to be committed at that time. If he pries beyond that it’s a red flag.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 08:19 PM
41

Babe, it’s not that your dumbass ex didn’t want you as much as he wants his new chick. He knew he didn’t deserve you. LVM like it when a woman makes them feel needed cos it gives them a chance to flex their manliness and make the woman swoon over him. It’s basically a power play, do not be fooled by it. It may appear on the outside like he suddenly turned into a Prince Charming overnight, but it’s all ego. I’m guessing you never had any trouble financially so his insecure ass realized he couldn’…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 08:02 PM
3

I use the same “what did you have in mind?” line and it’s usually met with the LAMEST responses. The worst one being “drink a bottle of wine by my pool”. I turned that down so he was like “maybe a drink”. This wasn’t even during lockdown or anything! Another time a guy offered to pick me up for a date and I thought he planned something so I didn’t ask questions, but we literally ended up just driving around cos “he didn’t know the area”. I told him I was hungry and he took me to a HOTEL bar. It …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 07:34 PM
12

Ignore everything they say and watch their actions. Men lie like there’s no tomorrow. Don’t sleep with a man for 3 months. A LVM will disappear or try to pressure you. A HVM will be glad you’re a challenge.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 07:01 PM
38

They lack the self awareness to realize that sex is a literally meaningless form of validation. It’s a bandaid for deeper problems. I read somewhere that the guy who wrote “the game” had to go to therapy for sex addiction. The red pill guys’ self esteem is even lower than the women they play. I clocked this red piller on tinder once from the language he was using and obvious negs so I decided to mess with him to see what would happen (led him on for a few days then abruptly rejected him) and thi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 06:45 PM
13

Babe you’re not pathetic for wanting to give someone the benefit of the doubt. We would want someone to forgive us if we fucked up and came to them with a sincere apology. Besides, men lie and gaslight us so much it’s hard when you’re in the middle of it to know what’s real and what’s a lie. Forgive yourself for not knowing what you know now! You learned <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 06:30 PM
28

Don’t forget you still have the ultimate power move at your fingertips: leveling up, moving on, and eventually dating the man he WISHES he could be. Men do this power play bullshit because their egos are so destroyed over the fact that they know a woman could easily turn around and replace them in literally .5 seconds with a better man. LVM resent women because our value is inherent and we can ALWAYS date up even if we’re broke, have kids, never went to college, live with our parents, etc but th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 06:22 PM
16

He’s just telling on himself, he clearly hasn’t learned the red pill tactics yet. I’m guessing he’s physically attractive or wealthy enough to have had his ego fluffed up by pickmes without resorting to lies so he’s assuming women should be desperate and he can dictate his terms with no loss. Usually the ones that go out of their way to lie and manipulate women are very unattractive and broke and can’t get any play otherwise.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 05:50 PM
103

Ugh this hurts to read. I bet if you had fell for his line about the proposal and taken him back he would’ve probably dumped you in a week once he had someone new on his arm. They just get off on dragging people into chaos. I’m glad you got away!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/20 05:19 PM
1

LVM are slow to getting over breakups cos they don’t give themselves enough time between relationships. Men do have feelings, they just don’t know how to deal with them so they move right on to the next girl and somehow rationalize that as a healthy response to a breakup.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/20 07:07 PM
12

Self love, validation, a life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/20 01:51 PM
1

If you BOTH have anxiety issues it’s a recipe for disaster. I understand that you want to empathize with this man, but trust me, he will not have the same empathy for you. Also, if he was flirting with you while he had a partner, he’s gonna do the same thing to you. That should be another clue that this man lacks empathy. I get why you feel it’s hypocritical to dump a man with anxiety issues cos yeah everyone has problems, but DO NOT make his problems your problems.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/20 01:50 PM
5

No your intuition cannot steer you wrong. He wants his ex back and she probably dumped his loser ass for reasons you shouldn’t stick around long enough to find out. You deserve better than a man who’s hung up on his ex still. Do yourself a favor and run.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/20 01:46 PM
4

Dump him. There’s nothing to talk about. He knows how you feel and he’s ignoring it. There ARE men in existence who don’t feel the need to lust after provocative photos. We’re just so used to LVM being the norm that we accept this immature behavior as par for the course. Dump him and pick your standards back up. It might take you a while to meet someone who meets your standards, but you need to think about your life in the long term. Think about your life 5, 10, 20 years from now. Do you want to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/20 01:39 PM
5

I dated a very effeminate soft boy back in college. We had been friends for a long time too so I thought I made a solid choice until the first time he made me cry and he literally stood there watching me until I stopped and then went to bed. We stayed friends after the breakup, he’s married now and has asked me to have sex with him TWICE because his wife won’t. It seems like she walks all over him bc of how soft spoken he is lmao IMO he got what he deserved.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/20 11:52 AM
9

Cut all contact with him and block him on everything. Then write down a list of all the things you dislike about him, all the mean things he did, all the reasons he’s a loser LVM and refer to that list whenever you start to miss him and make a PROMISE to yourself that no matter how sad you get and how much you miss him you will not contact him. It gets easier and easier everyday if you just stay strong. You’re gonna feel sad, you’re gonna miss him, you’re gonna think about all the nice things he…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/20 12:13 PM
4

They possess very little self worth so to them being upset is a sign that you care about what they think and they can control you. The only defense against these losers is utter indifference or pity like “this is how you need to act to feel good about yourself? I feel bad for you”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/20 11:46 AM
9

If some LVM makes some egregious insult towards you I would say it’s ok to put him in his place, but don’t give the emotional response he wants. You can embarrass him if you stay calm, but the second you get angry he knows he got under your skin and will see it like he “won” cos you got mad. But talk to him like he’s a misbehaving child and he will get embarrassed. One time a LVM ex was trying to get under my skin and I was just like “really? What did I ever do to you?” Make it about THEM. You w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/20 11:41 AM
37

Oh this is sad. He wants ALL men to stop putting in effort so that women will have no choice but to accept low effort? “We just have to be less horny” so you want to be women basically? You want to turn off your libido so you can do nothing but show up to get attention from the opposite sex? Nah, that’s never gonna work; cute idea though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/20 01:29 AM
63

Block them or if it happens in person literally just ignore it. Nothing takes the wind out of their sails like realizing they have zero effect on you. Imagine you have a force field of confidence. They don’t bother you, you don’t even find them annoying. Just think “god I’m bored did I just hear something? Hmm better go find my friends”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 09:25 PM
91

Yeah scrotes love it when we get all huffy. It’s funny to them. I’m trying to be more stoic as well so these LVM get no fun out of playing their games on me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 09:18 PM
171

Definitely. Anything they say purposely to get a rise out of you is a neg or a shit test.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 09:09 PM
7

WOW. Definition of not the time nor the place facepalm
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 07:17 PM
31

Don’t think of it as “I have to give mixed signals” think of it as revealing yourself slowly and always leave him wanting more. You’re not playing a mind game, you’re a busy, sought after HVW with lots of guys vying for your attention. You don’t want to respond to his text in 5 seconds but not because you’re playing a game, you just happen to have 3 other guys texting you, so if this guy really wants your full attention he better be asking you out on dates. He better be making sure he’s got his …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 11:01 AM
9

They get embarrassed and try to brush it off or apologize. You have to act like you’re completely confused and offended and be like “I thought this was a date?”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 10:16 AM
21

“Make sure there is no next time” lmaoooo that’s savage I love it. I tell guys “I would split the bill or pay for you if you were my boyfriend” same concept tho. I don’t entertain a man who asks on the first or second date about me paying, if I wanted to pay for my own meal I’d go eat with my friends or alone and more often than not if I’m alone I’ve had a random dude offer to buy my food so if YOU ask ME on a date and expect me to pay you are delusional sir.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/20 11:21 PM
9

That thought probably hasn’t even crossed his mind. His behavior is typical of a dismissive avoidant. He’d be the type of dad that would check out entirely and not feel even slightly guilty about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/20 12:26 AM
19

Ugh I’m sorry. At least now you know if he says he’s anxious and depressed it means “emotionally unavailable” and “very easily overwhelmed”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 11:24 PM
6

There’s literally no point in entertaining a guy who is pushing your boundaries this early. This is a pattern. What happens next time you say no to something? He’s gonna ignore it. Ghost.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 11:08 PM
9

Anyone have FDS Netflix recommendations?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 09:17 PM
126

Lol his rationalizing is all over the place in this post. He has the self awareness to recognize all he needed was someone to talk to, but instead of going to therapy, he completely abandoned her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 08:38 PM
32

Duh! Expecting a man to do domestic labor? That’s misandry!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 08:03 PM
10

It is sad, but it’s also better to have learned that lesson than to keep falling for every trick in the book and thinking that every guy who buys me flowers is a HVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 07:06 PM
99

$50k just to jerk off at a computer.............ngl some of these stories make me feel like I got off easy with LVM bs; this is next level.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 06:34 PM
53

WOW. A truly useless LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 06:27 PM
16

Simple. Everyone knows you can judge a person’s character by who their friends are. If a man wants to keep his friendship private, it means he’s hiding something. If he has nothing to hide, you should be able to meet his female friend and text her too. If your man’s friend wants to text him everyday, but doesn’t want any communication with you then she obviously wants something from your man. I’m not saying you have to be best friends with every single one of your boyfriend’s friends and become …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 06:12 PM
22

Yes absolutely. They’re called energy vampires for a reason. I’ve noticed repeatedly how I feel physically healthier after leaving bad relationships. First they make you feel great about yourself and then they slowly suck the life out of you. Your emotional attachment to a man is an energetic attachment. Energy vampires feed off of your energy whether it be admiration, praise, anger, resentment, etc. Some guys get off on the fact that they played you and it makes them smile knowing how mad and h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 05:41 PM
10

Yeah he seems like a nice guy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 08:05 PM
24

The things LVM find funny are so repulsive
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 06:46 PM
6

SAVING THIS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 06:09 PM
16

LOL that makes sense! Thanks for the explanation!! I dated a guy who had no male friends at all and always wondered why. I assumed he just preferred having female friends because he was more on the sensitive side. It didn’t occur to me that he had been rejected by his male peers and I know men are fine with being alone most of the time because they like to do things by themselves. He didn’t seem to care though, but I always wondered if he felt insecure about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 05:54 PM
20

“I like to incorporate comic relief in serious discussions helps to lighten the mood” this is my BIGGEST pet peeve. I hate when people make jokes during serious discussions. Maybe “the mood” doesn’t need to be lightened. Maybe people need to feel fucking outraged.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 05:35 PM
96

“But apparently that’s not the case” sounds passive aggressive as HELL.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 05:33 PM
81

And replace with “I love being single” “I am violently allergic to these red flags” “I can replace him in 2 seconds if I wanted to” “I would rather get a Pap smear than babysit a manchild” “my unconditional love is for myself and my children”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 05:30 PM
19

Right. Women need to stop being so flattered by a man wanting them to hang out at his apartment for sex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 05:03 PM
12

LMAOOO I’ve had a couple guys complain about the money they spent on me after we stopped seeing each other. It’s the reason they’ll always be broke! They’re too busy hoarding, counting every penny, keeping score. People who have healthy relationships with money know money is made easily and meant to be used for enjoyment. Men with scarcity mindsets are so unattractive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 05:01 PM
12

Woooofffff. That’s a slap in the face.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 04:55 PM
10

What about men who don’t have any male friends? Are they too afraid of being judged by other men so they just hang out with women to get attention?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 04:52 PM
108

Omg I just checked it out too wow these dudes are terrible!!! What classifies as a 10 in their book? A blow up doll?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 02:20 PM
5

Meditation has been the ultimate game changer for me tbh and the more consecutive days you do it the more you’ll notice the effects overall. Seriously keep at it even if it’s just 10 mins a day it’s worth it. You will give way less fucks. You’ll be able to detach yourself from thoughts instead of believing every little doubt and insecurity that runs through your head. Since I’ve been meditating I can literally choose to change the mood I’m in. I’ll realize I’m feeling lonely and I can quickly re…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 01:43 PM
241

“Solid 5/10” aka that girl would not even glance in my direction
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 01:36 PM
24

It only hurts because you’re putting him on a pedestal and focusing on the ways that he’s so great. Focus on his flaws and insecurities. Did you ignore any red flags? Write those down. A slow fade is a red flag btw. Slow fade means “I’m too immature and emotionally unavailable to tell you that I need space/I’m not interested.” Write down all of his flaws and traits that make him undesirable. Then write down how let down you feel as if you were writing a letter to him, but obviously don’t send it…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 01:31 PM
3

Telling on yourself for putting up with bad behavior is the best way lol. We convince ourselves to put up with so much bs but when you tell your friends they’re like “he did WHAT?!!!” and boom you realize you were literally being abused the whole time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 01:16 PM
15

I haaaaaaateeeeeee this. I don’t feel flattered that you want me back because you failed to replace me. 100% of the guys I’ve dated have come crawling back months or even years later and the two guys I gave second chances to didn’t even make it 2 days without repeating the same shitty behaviors that I hated during our relationship. They learn nothing!!! One showed up 30 mins late to a date and the other asked me for money to pay for parking! You beg me for a second chance and this is how you fuc…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 01:09 PM
71

If men knew how to properly groom and trim their beards and use beard oil to keep it from looking like a raggedy mountain of pubes on their chin it would be ok but seriously....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 12:58 PM
16

I just looked up this post. I’m glad most of the comments are saying “girl, RUN!” and affirming her instincts. That is some seriously creepy shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 12:55 PM
107

“Got a boyfriend yet” classy opening. Clearly someone who comprehends how dating works.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 12:11 PM
4

Poverty minded men are the only ones who complain about spending money on women looollll. They think money can only be made by working a job or winning the lottery. A man who’s financially literate and has multiple streams of income doesn’t worry about replacing the $85 he spent on dinner.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 12:07 PM
1

Hmm HVM that called you a bitch? Doesn’t add up to me. Hasn’t made an effort to see you? Not HVM behavior. Committed exclusively to you after just talking for 4 months but no date? Doesn’t seem like HVM behavior. HVM are just as selective as HVW. It doesn’t sound very promising to me. And the fact that you say you love him already seems like you’re a bit delusional as to what’s going on. What has this man done for you to show you that he cares about you? Tbh I would start seeing other men and ex…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 11:26 AM
35

Nice!!!!! Bravo!!!! It goes to show this stuff really does work!! Women are brainwashed by society into thinking that sleeping with a guy after a third date is no big deal but it is!!! The sooner you sleep with a guy the more likely he is to think “wow that’s all it takes?” and devalue you even when they’re the ones pressuring you for sex in the first place!!! The way you treat a man is how he assumes you treat ALL men. If you’re incredibly selective it makes them step their game up. Nice job!!!…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 11:16 AM
37

Good for you to sticking to your standards. I hate seeing my friends get into relationships and then having to constantly listen to a guy complain about what a bitch his child’s mother is and having to watch him be a crappy father. I went on a date w a guy who didn’t tell me he had a kid once and when we met up he showed me like 400 pics of her (I’m also not into dating men with children so I just politely smiled and didn’t say anything which he took as a cue to continue the slideshow of this cu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 11:07 AM
66

Ugh he got his slobber on you AND in the middle of a global pandemic where literally hundreds of thousands of people are dying and it’s been proven there are asymptomatic carriers....wtffffff whyyyyy?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 10:47 AM
20

Aw damn not again 😭
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 10:44 AM
15

“I found my gf complaining about me on Reddit and asking for advice and I’m mad so I went on reddit to complain about her and ask for advice”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 10:40 AM
7

For real though, I have not found any other dating advice for women ANYWHERE that’s not “cOMmuNicATe with him!!!” If men wanted to communicate 99% of all relationship issues would disappear immediately. FDS is the only place that encourages leaving, something I’ve ALWAYS told women who complain about their boyfriends. And leaving a man who’s treating you like sh*t is NOT misandry-it’s self preservation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 10:34 AM
32

There’s no point in getting emotionally invested in a man. They never invest emotionally in us and if they do it’s very shallow and easily retracted. Men bank on us getting emotionally invested so they can gradually pull back the effort they make and get an upper hand in the relationship causing women to over function to “fix” it. The only way to maintain any power in a relationship is to remove emotions from the equation completely.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 02:42 AM
45

Seriously lmao we avoid 90% of men
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 02:02 AM
137

The sad part is men really do know our value better than we do. That’s why some of them feel they have to manipulate us to keep us around. If women truly knew how many options they had and how many great men would kill for a chance with us we wouldn’t put up with ANY bs. We have all the power. Men need us so much more then we will ever need them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 12:21 AM
14

Hollywood also pushes an idealized version of men. The guy who gets the girl in the movies is always a cute, quirky, sensitive sweetie who makes grand gestures to WIN THE GIRL.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 11:18 PM
22

Men purposely say we’re overreacting to gaslight us to make us doubt our intuition so don’t beat yourself up. You can regain your alignment with your intuition through meditation and basically just staying single for a long time. The trick is once you start dating again you need to be ready to walk away the minute something feels “off”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 11:05 PM
20

The fact that she would even have to ask that question makes me want to cry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 10:58 PM
24

Right, it’s soooo sad. The ugliest guys I’ve dated were always the ones that turned out to be the most bitter and nasty at the end and THEY were always the ones that ruined it by being mean in the first place!! They’re the same ones that are always bitching that girls don’t date nice guys. Yeah you WERE a nice guy until you got insecure over every little thing and started making unnecessary digs at me. With the dude I dated in HS, I couldn’t even go to my female friends house without him getting…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 10:50 PM
50

Ugh I know it’s such a long deprogramming process to start acknowledging your own needs as a higher priority than other’s and men just go about their lives not even worrying about us. When I was 20 I had a boyfriend who would go make himself snacks and drinks when I was at his house, eat them in front of me, and not even ask me if I wanted anything...and because I was such a people pleaser I wouldn’t even say anything. I’m glad I grew out of that. If a guy can’t even acknowledge a basic need lik…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 09:57 PM
3

Oh I believe it. They ALWAYS come back. Fortunately right after this breakup is when I found the shera7 videos and never looked back. I absolutely cannot go back to dusty men now that I have this information 😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 09:03 PM
2

A lot of men know when they can’t do better, but they try anyway cos at the end of the day they got us for SOME reason so maybe someone equally as hot will be equally as dumb...so they’ll TRY because it’s better than coming crawling back after a month asking you to take them back. They gotta give it at least 3-6 months before they come crawling back. And I appreciate the support!! I’ve decided that whenever I want to feel sad about it, I just laugh instead. Because LVM don’t care about our feeli…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 08:43 PM
5

So true. They get to die with the smug satisfaction of knowing they were a “ladies man”. I do think that deep, DEEP down they feel like shit for not creating anything meaningful, but it’s to painful to acknowledge that sadness and “boys don’t cry!” So they just stay smug about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 07:30 PM
6

“A lifetime of memories chasing pu$$y with nothing else to show for” lmaooooo I was already laughing at the behavior of the LVM examples in this thread, but when you put it like that it sounds even funnier 😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 07:19 PM
58

SAME. I was shocked to find out most girls seem to do it and some actually like it?! I’m so glad that even as a pick me, I was still wayyyy too stuck up to even try it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 07:05 PM
4

Is it worth talking about? Girlfriend, you already told him how you felt and he mocked you. FFS we need to start formally inviting all women to join this sub
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 06:40 PM
36

A 40 year old woman is wayyy more attractive and valuable than a 40 year old man for the simple fact that we’re not ego driven narcissists who only care about money and status. We take care of ourselves, we nurture our relationships with our friends, we naturally glow and vibrate with health and beauty while men just fall apart. Men don’t take care of themselves, they need a mommy girlfriend to do it for them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 06:22 PM
52

He could never give you respect for any of those things because he can’t do it himself so you made him feel emasculated. Men pretend not to care about how much money you make or how educated you are because deep down they’re insecure about those things.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 06:20 PM
57

LOL FOR REALLLLL. In high school I had a BF who treated me like trash in front of his friends even though he was ugly, had horrible acne, had zero muscle, etc. He was nice to me in the beginning of our relationship, this was about 6 months or so in. I remember him making me cry in front of his friends and laughing about it. When we broke up he (obviously) lied and said he had cheated on me and all this bs. I knew he was lying but still couldn’t comprehend why he was being so abusive and inflamma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 06:05 PM
89

Because when you do or say something to a man he thinks that’s what you do with all men. Shera explains this very well in her videos. If you send nude pics to a man, even if you’ve NEVER done it before and you tell him that, he will assume that you’re lying (because men lie. All. The. Time.) and he’ll say to himself “what’s the point? Every guy already has naked pictures of this girl on his phone”. If you say to a man “I’m not sure” “I need to think about it” “I want to take things slow” he thin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 05:29 PM
137

It’s funny to me when the same men who bitch about gold diggers get a significant pay rise and start dating women who would want nothing to do with them if they were broke. Women’s worlds don’t revolve around our egos so it’s easy for us to say “how much money a guy makes doesn’t matter” but to them IT MATTERS and the woman on their arm is a status symbol even if he’s a HVM. It’s important that as women we start understanding the types of things that you explained because men think a lot differe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 05:22 PM
186

The grossest part about older men dating younger women is that it always balloons their narcissistic egos exorbitantly. My ex whom I just made a post about was 11 years older than me and he would say things like “I don’t feel that much older than you, when I see us together I feel like we’re basically the same age”. Uhhh WRONG, anyone that looks at us knows you’re WAY older you’re basically 40, you have gray hair, and are overweight, and I’m a 28 year old who looks like I’m 23. The last time we …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 05:01 PM
3

“Redpillers are essentially mad at themselves” that is a SOLID point. I know VERY few women who just want sex for the hell of it and sooner than later most women want to settle down. The more times a woman gets fucked over by a man the sooner she’s going to start becoming weary of men and their intentions and that means even LESS sex for these entitled scrotes. Before I was even aware of what Red Pill/PUA tactics were all about I got good at sussing them out and scrotes would get MAD AS HELL. I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 04:36 PM
6

LOL nothings ever gonna be “enough” for a LVM cos they’re trying to use women to make up for what they lack internally. I wish I had realized this sooner. I wasn’t particularly devastated by the breakup at all, but it did confuse me that he didn’t think I was enough when I knew I was the whole damn package and probably the most HVW he would ever be able to get. I never tried to convince him of my worth, but I did ask what was wrong with this picture to see if he could introspect on it a bit. He …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 04:26 PM
40

I had a guy ask me what my mom’s boobs looked like after she had kids so I could tell what mine would look like.....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 03:51 PM
4

Yeah I have no doubt that he will regret it. He seemed to be of the mind that he had already dealt with his issues, but clearly still feels deeply insecure. Anyone who NEEDS sex and female validation that badly has a lot of work to do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 03:41 PM
7

YIKES.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 03:36 PM
4

As far as I know she was only going to his house once a week for sex. She already had a boyfriend but she was verrryyyyy emotionally attached to my ex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 12:58 PM
14

I realize that I got played. That’s why I was asking “what ends up happening to them?” to confirm my suspicion that he will end up miserable. I’m not asking “will he ever change so we can be together?” I’m dumb, but I’m not THAT dumb.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 12:53 PM
29

Actually what ultimately ended up happening was I stopped listening to him and sat down and talked to her and she was the one who told me about all of the shit he was saying behind my back to lead her on. He obviously would have never admitted to it. She and I had a calm, mature, lengthy conversation and she told me he would never be good at relationships which was why I ended up leaving. I was nice to her and tried to empathize, but all she wanted was to keep sleeping with my ex. The reason I c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 12:45 PM
13

Good point. I don’t know why I expected him to give up his only means of validation. Being wanted by a hot, intelligent, successful woman like me wouldn’t replace the rush of dozens of NSA hookups. I see now that he just doesn’t view a healthy relationship as a good enough trade off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 12:20 PM
11

I appreciate you girl lol I’ve never been the type to stick around for bs for very long. I have also noticed the correlation between f-boys and unhealthy habits. They really are just always trying to find ways to avoid dealing with themselves. Eating junk food, drinking, sex addiction, it all goes hand in hand. I thought he was trying to become a better person, but he didn’t have the best habits when it came to making healthy decisions for himself-that should’ve been a sign that he had really lo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 12:15 PM
11

65?!? Sheeeeeshhhhh. I figured they would all mature at some point, but that’s obviously very idealistic thinking. I guess there’s still plenty of pick mes around even when they get older.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 12:09 PM
40

So basically even if they “settle down” they still don’t care about you as a person. Noted! Thank you!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 11:39 AM
3

My experience with OLD: tinder: fuckboys, fuckboys, fuckboys, and more fuckboys. Saw an ex on there lying about his age and marital status. HARD PASS. bumble: even worse than tinder. The guys are still all fuckboys but you have to match AND message them first? I went on one date with a seemingly nice guy I met and he ended up being 30 mins late to our first date, had no job (in his profile he said he was a teacher, but it turned out he had quit to start growing and selling weed), and major mommy…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 11:09 AM
4

Neither the LVM nor the HVM wants to help you with your mental health issues, hate to say it. The LVM isn’t interested point blank and the HVM will feel bad for you and help you through a TEMPORARY low but ultimately wants someone who’s stable enough on their own. I would take a break from dating anyone seriously while you’re healing. I will say male FRIENDS can be excellent to talk to. I’ve come to realize that all of my female friends are pickmeishas so I still associate with the ones that I c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 02:48 AM
15

*pick mes that haven’t realized their worth yet will fuck you Fixed it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 02:25 AM
3

5 I can relate to soooo much. I remember having zero energy for my friendships and family when I was dating LVM. I feel physically healthier being single and I’m so much more enthusiastic about my friendships and my life in general compared to when I was letting some piece of sh*t LVM drain all my energy and self worth with his shady manipulation tactics.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/20 11:42 PM
7

Lol in one scenario for me I googled a line a guy used on me and it brought me straight to a PUA tactic website. These men are not very smart. Look out for “negs” which are backhanded compliments or sometimes straight out insults to lower your self esteem. A HVM will not insult you. Ever. Even jokingly. The best defense against all types of LVM in general is not to sleep with them for three months and never get emotionally attached-always be ready to walk away even if you’re married. Always make…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/20 11:34 PM
3

“Sorry I was laughing too hard” absolutely savage. What did this guy expect? Lmao “I’m looking for a pick me FWB to exploit but you’re attractive enough to deserve whatever my LVM idea of courtship is. Want to go for a nice walk? Or should we just go straight to Netflix and chill? My mom can order us pizza!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 04:19 PM
2

I don’t think you sounded desperate at all. Your replies came off a liiiiittle harsh in my opinion but NOT because of what you said and more because it’s easy to misinterpret your tone over a messages. It seems like he was just a broke dude who took your response as you being bitchy when you were just teasing him a bit. I don’t think anything you could have said would’ve made this loser actually want to take you out on a real date but for next time try to message things that can only be construe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 07:25 PM
1

MEDITATE. Meditation is a game changer; it will benefit your whole life. I meditate 5x a day for 15 mins in quarantine, you don’t have to go that hard but it’s a quick way to give wayyyyy less fucks. Watch shera7’s YouTube videos on how to stay emotionally detached they are GOLD. Talk to LOTS AND LOTS of men. Talk to men you don’t find quite as attractive, they’ll usually be the ones you end up genuinely liking because they’re less likely to have the god complex that hot guys have. Less attracti…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 06:40 PM
2

Right why is she going online to get advice? For a fully grown adult?? Just throw the whole man away! Something tells me this is not the only major dealbreaker this guy has, this is just the tip of the iceberg.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 05:41 PM
2

Hell yes I buy myself flowers, jewelry, chocolate, all the stuff I desperately wanted men to buy me during my pick me days. It’s a win-win cos it makes you feel good and sets the tone for how you expect to be treated by men. In one of shera’s videos she said to tell men that you’re single bc you’re “too spoiled” and honestly it works. Even in my last relationship with a LVM he would buy me gifts and flowers....and then he complained that he had spent more money on me than any gf he’s ever had, b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 05:19 PM
1

Ugh whyyyyyy do people perpetuate this ridiculous notion?! It’s so harmful to women and men are NOT conditioned by society to “change” for women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 05:00 PM
1

I was a pick me that held men to higher standards than most pick mes so as soon as I started learning about this stuff it resonated with me really quickly. I never gave in to doing degrading things for men’s pleasure like anal, threesomes, tolerating porn, etc. I briefly got into BDSM because I fell for that whole “BDSM is about cOnSEnt and cOmMuNIcaTiOn” CRAP thinking it would lead to a more fulfilling relationship with a charming narcissistic abuser I had a crush on. He threw me off by telling…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 04:28 PM
5

On the bright side, you are still VERY young and lucky to be learning all of this stuff now. I know it’s hard to be sitting there kicking yourself for ignoring the signs and excusing away all of his shortcomings, but think about it this way: it wasn’t your idea. You didn’t wake up one day and decide you wanted to commit yourself to an emotionally unavailable man. Everything on tv, on the internet (except for this forum and the shera7 videos), and in magazines is CONSTANTLY enforcing this idea th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 03:59 PM
1

Don’t even entertain men like this. Cut them off without a second thought. A man who’s that fixated on sex is a loser. Do not engage with low value men. They don’t give a fuck. One of my only close male friends sexually assaulted me in my sleep and it made me question all of my male friendships after that. I started noticing how many men will only hang around if they think there’s a chance that sex might happen. They’re more likely to spend time with you when it’s in a position where you’re vuln…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 02:20 PM
15

Honestly don’t even worry about men getting upset or defensive. Most men are very insecure and clueless. Real men want a chase and a woman who isn’t a doormat. 95% of men will not be worth your time, it’s better to just look for signs to weed them out rather than changing your behavior to avoid upsetting them. A real man will want to make you happy and it doesn’t require any special communication skills for a man to act right-seriously. He either will or won’t. All you have to do is find a man w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 12:53 PM
2

Likes other women’s photos, stops liking yours as soon as you like him. Only follows girls, has very few or no male friends. Selfies, shirtless pics, gym selfies, memes, and ANY screenshots of text conversations. Lots of comments and likes from other women. Look at the tags he follows on IG too. Mature men do not use social media very much. Excessive posting of any kind even if it’s pics of food just screams “look at me! Give me attention”. Obvious signs of insecurity can be easily found on a ma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 12:39 PM
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