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dnbndnb Archive

View 0 posts and 893 comments by dnbndnb on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

Everything is negotiable, except child support. If you get her while she is in the fog and needs money, she may agree to a lump upfront, and then you are off the hook further down the line.
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/25 12:59 AM
2

Money traded up front now in a lump sum is your better choice.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 11:30 PM
9

You cannot convince her of anything is she gets the “feels”. Women love to sabotage their own friends and drag them down to their level. Better you ask her to tell her what’s wrong with your marriage in her opinion v the grand tales of excitement she hears. Even better, tell her you want to register as a man on a few dating sites just to show her the women out there in her age range seeking validation. Then ask her if destroying the lives of her children is worth keeping up with the “Jane’s”, as…
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/25 04:46 AM
14

The carousel is calling. Buy her a cat as a parting gift.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/25 03:32 PM
1

You need to spend some time on YouTube with John Griffin — Life 2.0
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/25 07:37 PM
1

My only “negative” (and it’s not a bias) is that this is a woman psychologist diagnosis of men. What I found over time since I read that article is her emphasis on the man wanting sex is really natural male biology, and my impression was she pointed that out as a possible negative when it really is not, it’s just life. In turn, the “crazy wife” while applicable to my ex- is also somewhat applicable to most women who expect their men to be “more emotional” when the reality is men are not brought …
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/25 03:25 AM
1

https://www.drpsychmom.com/men-who-think-their-primary-value-is-being-a-workhorse/ While this was a partial description of me, there’s a link in there that also described her.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/25 07:00 PM
1

He’s definitely a stoic. I tend to like most of them so no particular one.
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/25 07:53 PM
6

Parenting requires self-sacrifice.
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/25 12:39 PM
9

This man has the answers you are looking for. I suggest you watch several of his videos. https://youtube.com/@john-griffin?si=yBUS7DMuV2ADQjXu Keep in mind, for every man who thinks he’s found an incredible woman, there’s at least one other guy out there who’s totally done with her bullshit. You’re not really missing her, you’re missing your idealized version of what you believed she was. One time, probably my best and most honest friend, a man who never really knew my ex- and had only met her 1…
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/25 12:22 PM
1

https://a.co/d/2Ja8LyJ Though there are tons of them on Amazon
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/25 11:04 PM
1

That’s good, but also a hassle. You can’t be carrying that around every time you’re out of your room.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/25 11:02 PM
3

You better wear a VAR every moment you’re in the home.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/25 11:00 PM
4

When your son is with you, take your phone and his, put them face down in another room, and do things away from electronics. Take him out for lunch w/o his phone. Try to explain to him that people in his life that actually care about him are for more important than phones & games. If she objects, tell her that your time with your son is YOUR time, not necessarily her time to control your time.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/25 04:56 AM
5

Let’s get you a better, more realistic answer. If you can, arrange custody such that she has it, and you have visitation rights. At that point, you can “leave” for greener pastures in the nearest urban area, and try to see your kid on the weekends. Chances are she’ll want those weekends free anyway. Do not tell her you plan to move. Get this thru the court as concerns the child, get it all on paper, and then do your thing. It’s impossible to know if she will engage in parental alienation and tur…
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/25 11:26 PM
17

She’s not happy you moved out/on so easily. She has a standard of entitlement and you’re not meeting it. You’re not groveling after her. And what you spend to “help” does not register at all. Chances are new man and new life are not working out in the fantasy way she expected.
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/25 10:44 PM
4

You sir, need to be carrying a VAR (voice activated recorder) for ANY interface you have with your STBXW. You need to document this episode and start documenting everything contemporaneously. If CPS ends up speaking with you about this brushing episode, you need to tell them you were at a loss as to what to do as this is a highly contentious divorce, but “yeah, I have some fear for my kids as I know courts usually lean towards maternal custody and I’m afraid my wife is going to fabricate stories…
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/25 08:55 AM
1

She will press you for as much as she can squeeze out if you. That’s not how it works most of the time. She may not want you, but she wants all the benefits of you for many years to come. Find that backbone and stiffen it up a bit. Start practicing the word “no” and the phrase “that’s unacceptable”.
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/25 08:44 AM
1

I have first hand experience dealing with this for my former MIL. 1) so long as you literally pay anything each month, you’ll likely never go to collections. So if you owe say $400/mo on a card, just pay $100. 2) you can negotiate yourself with credit card companies and if you have the cash now, eliminate your debt at 50-70% of what you owe. I wiped out many thousands my MIL owed. Here’s how you do it: you call the CC company and ask for a supervisor. You tell them you want to do a negotiated pa…
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/25 08:38 AM
3

I shared 35 with mine. I tried to do everything right. She did shitty things in return. Good riddance.
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/25 06:02 AM
6

And yet another appropriate thread where I say “Go binge watch this channel & youll feel a lot better”. And you will… https://youtube.com/@john-griffin?si=C3wHVfdQMsXozXmo As to staying in contact with your ex-, don’t bother. My ex- lives 1 mile from me in the same community. I maybe see her 1x a month and say hello. Joint friends & neighbors know I have zero desire to interface with her. I say so bluntly. She said we should be “friends” but after thinking it over, I told myself I have no lying,…
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/25 05:54 AM
2

Ah yes, the great communicators that they are…
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/25 05:49 AM
3

Ever notice they never say what they hope to do for you?
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/25 05:47 AM
1

“It’s always darkest before the dawn”. The goal is to grind you down. You have the choice in how it grinds you. I’ve been under significant stress for long periods a few times in my life. In the end I realized much of that stress becomes self imposed. YOU let it build as a pile. Far better to deal with one issue at a time, control what you can, and don’t let the stuff you can’t control end up controlling you. Yours is yet another post where I suggest you binge watch this guy below. Think of him …
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/25 01:55 AM
3

It is not uncommon for the spouse to leave the provider once the provider can no longer provide. You’re only as good as the last payment you make. She obviously does not want to be “burdened” by taking care of you. Now that you’ve blown all your money & are only an expense… adios!
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/25 07:59 PM
1

I always say sue her for defamation of character and anything else. Let her know you mean business.
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/25 05:45 PM
4

Women can be exceptionally emotionally cruel. “Mean girls” was not just a movie. She feels very strong & empowered now.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/25 04:41 PM
7

Please spend some time binge watching this man’s channel. I believe it will help you. https://youtube.com/@john-griffin?si=GHpPWZdQrIG400ty
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/25 04:39 PM
5

The sense of entitlement never ends.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/25 07:52 PM
3

Mine was in AZ. Both of us retired. I’m sure my ex- thought there would be alimony but as soon as she called it, I did some quick research. When I told her there would be no alimony, instead of saying “of course” she said “well I have to protect my interests”. I’m sure she actually believed there would be on the basis of whatever gf’s were advising her.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/25 04:33 PM
2

You cannot “legally” hide money, but given you own a business there are ways you can “lose it” and later recoup it. Depends upon the business. At the present time you have commingled assets. As such both you and her can spend whatever you want on whatever you want. There is logic in spending money to protect it. For example you can pre-fund college plans for the kids, thus taking money off the table now for future use later that you likely would spend money upon at that time.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/25 02:25 AM
10

If she’s bringing up divorce, she has dollar signs in her eyes. See an attorney immediately
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/25 12:44 AM
2

Wholly disagree. “Using them” is what the parent pushing alienation is doing.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/25 02:40 AM
9

Plan one last trip to the house. Have a trailer or whatever, get what you want/need, and end this “stuff” business. Tell her you don’t want her there when you come, and you especially do not want her fuckhead BF there. If she fails to accommodate you, tell her “lose the fuckhead, I’m moving back in until I get the last of my stuff”. When you go back, have a friend vidro everything that gets done and taken from arrival to departure.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/25 04:14 AM
2

Document, document, document. Ask your kids on video “what do mommy & grannie say about me? Do you believe them? How often do they say this?”
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/25 04:04 AM
4

This would be my communication to her: “I understand you’d like to see a higher price on the sale of the home. Obviously so would I! Unfortunately, post-divorce I don’t have the free cash flow to spruce it up. It’s difficult enough as it is to keep up with all the costs of a single household. Now if YOU would like to pay materials & labor to spruce it up, by all means let’s do it! We’ll take that money off the top when it sells and give it back to you, then split any gains afterwards. We need to…
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/25 02:25 AM
9

She seems very entitled and self-absorbed. Certainly rather clueless about how many shining white nights want to sweep a women in her 40’s(?) with a bad attitude and two young children off her feet. I stayed with a cheating wife to protect my children, but she was never this toxic. I might suggest you divide your finances now. As in, you keep what’s yours, pay half the bills, and tell her that her “retail therapy” is over. When she protests, tell her this is what divorce life looks like, and tha…
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/25 04:00 AM
20

It’s not your problem to manage her relationships. You’re getting divorced. She’s on her own.
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/25 08:25 PM
2

Your feelings are quite valid. You feel used and abused by the person you should have been able to trust the most Go take your anger out on some iron in a gym. Maybe a heavy bag as well. Yours is another post where I’ll say “go spend some time binge watching videos from the below YouTube channel”. I’m pretty certain he’s going to help. https://youtube.com/@john-griffin?si=XyavHE5obKvd50OS
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/25 11:58 AM
2

Both my ex- and my families were dysfunctional. However 35 years ago there was no internet and no one talked of such things. You’d just “deal with it”. In retrospect there were plenty of 🚩flags that I ignored. And I doubt she’s spend even a few minutes in her entire life actually contemplating her destructive actions. Like one of the other replies, I was a Nice Guy who wanted to be happy and for her to be happy. Now in her 60’s she’s still not beyond the “party” stage. Always had to be doing som…
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/25 11:51 AM
4

You sir need to spend some time binge watching this YouTube channel to better understand what you’re going through. It’s not so much “red pill” content as it’s educated stoicism. https://youtube.com/@john-griffin?si=G4f65h39Tv3AXf-8
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/25 05:14 AM
3

I have a close friend. We used to go to lunch regularly when I lived in the same city. It was a “guys” thing. We never socialized with spouses and never met each others.. One day he starts to open up about his wife. He was clearly near a breaking point. I let him talk about her uninterrupted, then asked a few questions. Although not a trained professional, by his description, he was “married to my mother” — a woman with true Narcissist Personality Disorder. I told him ordinary I would suggest co…
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/25 04:41 AM
10

She doesn’t really want you back, she simply doesn’t want anyone else to have you. Likely she had another guy on the line, and you were always Plan B if it didn’t work out. Now that you’re officially “moving on” and life has not become what she’s expected, she wants to grab back on to something (someone) and you’re a known quantity. My advice is DO NOT do it!
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/25 12:55 AM
6

Congratulations! I too am much happier post divorce. Took a few years to get here. Never going back
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/25 04:22 PM
5

This is a form of manipulation & punishment. Go book your diary as well. Or, don’t come home s few times when she expects to go out. She’s trying to marginalize you as much as possible. OTOH, if you keep a copy of all this, it will help in a custody fight showing she has little interest in being with the children.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/25 04:16 PM
11

It took me ~2 years of self-analysis (picking apart me, her, our marriage, our dysfunction etc) to be “good”. Now at 3.5 years I don’t think I’ve been happier in decades. It DOES get better with time.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/25 04:11 PM
5

You’re correct, not all are. However the ones that leave “good men” have this in common.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/25 02:01 AM
40

I watched that video a long time ago. Just rewatched it. It can be summed up as: 1) if SHE is not “happy”, you must be the problem. 2) SHE can never be the problem so she’ll justify her actions to MAKE you the problem in her mind. 3) women have serious issues with accountability for their actions, and little to no introspection skills. 4) nothing is ever their fault.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/25 11:24 PM
1

Exactly. She fell for some other guy, let him support her.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/25 04:25 AM
10

Chances are you lived your married life (at least at some point) worried about “what’s she thinking”. You cannot control other peoples thoughts. Any future “she” will think what she wants to think. Have a simple one-liner to deal with this. “Divorce pretty much wiped out my savings so in order to rebuild I moved back in with my parents for a bit. And amazingly, it’s not so bad at all. Not permanent, but it’s working for all of us.”
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/25 04:12 AM
2

Right there with ya brother.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/25 07:28 PM
5

This guy on YouTube will explain a lot of what you don’t understand. I suggest you binge watch him. https://youtube.com/@john-griffin?si=wThMo2rV1Yox5GIs My split was after 35 years together. It took 2 years to be truly good with it, and now 3.5 years later I don’t think I could be happier! You’re going thru an adjustment period. She checked out long ago. So she looks “just fine” as her adjustment was made during the marriage. You were simply kept in the dark.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/25 07:45 PM
1

Depending on alimony laws in your state, you really should discuss this with a lawyer. Remaining married for longer may saddle you with supporting her a long time when you do get divorced.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/25 07:41 PM
2

If we don’t help each other, who will?
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/25 10:05 PM
1

https://youtube.com/@john-griffin?si=DNQWA_7mKUYv8gCJ
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/25 09:52 PM
2

Pretty sure that was me. Ive posted him up in lots of threads.
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/25 09:51 PM
14

Grey divorce here. Went on a few dates. Even found one woman I really liked, only to find she really only cared about what she cared about, and not what I cared about. Now I have no desire to date again. On those rare moments I get the urge it passes quickly. My life is VERY peaceful. No reason to screw that up.
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/25 08:57 PM
4

Honestly, I would sue her for defamation of character, emotional distress, and anything else some cheap shyster is will to tag on there. Understand it will never make it to court, but the goal is to show backbone and let her know you’re serious.
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/24 07:40 PM
2

I put this up in occasional posts here. You need to spend time on the YouTube channel of John Griffin. He’s not “red pill rage” like some channels, but more psychological stoic in nature. Your rage will eventually pass. It comes from lots of places but justly from allowing yourself to be used and manipulated. We’ve all been there. John will cover some of the psychological aspects you’ve never dwelled upon. Give him a try. Also accept time will dull this. All that said, if you still have to inter…
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/24 02:15 PM
3

You sir, need to visit the YouTube channel of John Griffin for the education you are lacking. Beating “weak” is the last thing a woman wants from a man. There’s a whole lot of “female psychology” you’ve likely never explored, as most of us here never did. You’ll get past this, look back, and if you do it correctly be thankful for your freedom. Go watch a bunch of John. You’ll thank me later.
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/24 01:35 PM
0

A belated Christmas gift of house cleaners?
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/24 08:40 PM
1

Get a dumpster delivered and just throw it away. It may hurt at the time, but you’ll forget about it soon enough.
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/24 08:34 AM
3

How you split it depends on how combative you both are and how much money is truly involved. My ex- and I were splitting multiple 7 figures. I did a spreadsheet of estimates for all the big stuff, the house, furniture as a lot, vehicles, and then personal goods. Never even contemplated things like cleaning supplies. Keep it on the big scale. Don’t sweat the little shit. Just assign a value to it and try to leave it with her so you don’t have to deal with moving it. And please don’t do a list lik…
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/24 08:28 AM
3

He’s just one of many. As far as he’s concerned, you as a couple are long over. Obviously she feels the same. You want to stand on a principle that really no longer applies. If this were the guy who destroyed your marriage, I’d understand. In the end, it’s all about the kid now, not your principles.
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/24 08:22 AM
2

Excellent choice!
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/24 05:01 AM
2

Choose wisely grasshopper. AI is going to eliminate many jobs over the next decade. Those least likely are the ones involved in “one-off” work like tradesmen. If you think a smart computer might be able to replace you, hood chance it will.
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/24 04:30 AM
5

This. Exactly. Also find out who served you. There’s some relationship there.
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/24 03:51 AM
0

No running away. 🤦‍♂️ He took an opportunity that sounds like it was what he always wanted. SHE AGREED TO HIS PLANS. What you advocate is whatever she does or wants, whenever she changes her mind, he should simply bend to it. Such a marriage will never last.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/24 07:26 PM
1

The Talking Heads said it best: Psycho Killer Qu’est-ce que c’est ? fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa far better Run run run run run run run away Psycho Killer Qu’est-ce que c’est ? fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa far better Run run run run run run run away
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/24 03:10 AM
3

I personally don’t know of one. There are many relationship books, but I find many lend themselves towards the female view of the world. One of the top recommended books for men is “No More Mr. Nice Guy”. I found it decent. In my case I like YouTube as I can listen while doing other things. There are a few videos I’ve found that really helped understand the emotional POV in a way that guys don’t really get. I’ll put them below. https://youtu.be/j3nXYVlPrcY?si=5g_4DFltxGbHsXdc https://youtu.be/qy…
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/24 11:34 PM
1

Today’s video appears to be written for you!
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/24 07:56 PM
6

It does not sound like you can afford counseling, nor much of anything else. You need a plan sir. I suggest you focus first on the following: 1) job 2) wheels if you don’t have them 3) place to live (which could be #2 if you get a van) 4) cheap gym membership Men need a sense of purpose, and right now you have none, so you’re wallowing. Frankly, at this point being the fry cook at McDonalds would be just fine, so long as you have some structure and some responsibility. Construction would likely …
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/24 06:20 AM
6

Were I in your shoes, frankly, i’d sue her for defamation of character. Others will tell you not to bother, but that’s what I’d do. I’d want that “on record” and I’d make her go to court over it. Nothing less that a written admission that she made it up would stop the suit. And I’d file a new one every f’n time she pulls bullshit like this. I’d further demand psychological evaluation of her fitness as a parent. Total scorched earth. But that’s just me.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/24 06:06 AM
2

You married a “human doing”. They can’t be, only do…
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/24 01:56 AM
5

If it means anything, they likely won’t last. Your anger will chill more with more time. Don’t get yourself locked up over fighting with the trash. I’m going to suggest you spend some time on the YouTube channel of John Griffon. I think it will help you.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/24 09:18 PM
3

The lease on the rented house can expire. She’ll have to leave the house.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/24 05:11 PM
2

BTW, I should add something else. It is possible that having the baby where you work now may lead to dual citizenship. THAT is well worth several months wherever you are if that’s an option.
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/24 02:13 AM
-1

“Has to take responsibility”… what does that exactly mean? Where is her responsibility for getting pregnant? Going off the pill so quickly? (Please don’t tell me she didn’t know as the women always know). And where is her responsibility for supporting his decision and now rug pulling that support?
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/24 02:06 AM
1

Though my ex-w wanted the divorce, I filed. Her credit took NO hit, mine immediately went down by like 60(?) points. Just when filing. We both had high limit CC’s (mine significantly higher) with low usage, paid off monthly, and no mortgage. It appears there’s an immediate bias against men in divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/24 07:45 PM
1

I don’t know this guy personally, but my impression from others is she’s got a “nice guy” (like I was) and she’s going to “direct” the relationship. I’m an extremely introspective person. My ex- has zero introspection. Zero accountability. I don’t actually want to be his “friend”, I just want to see the look on her face if I offered him a night out with some beers. She’d immediately be aware that her carefully crafted “poor me” stories (lies) would immediately be exposed.
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/24 07:17 PM
23

She knew EXACTLY what she was doing when she got pregnant. The baby was the “anchor” to keep you in the relationship on her terms. She has put herself first in this drama, and the baby is the trump card in this “game”. Your family is supporting her because they want this grandchild. She’s the “poor wife who was abandoned” and gets to regularly play that sympathy card. Women are very good at this manipulation. Think about this… there are married men in the military that are regularly deployed awa…
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/24 05:10 PM
2

The night she admitted there was physical contact during her cheating. It never went back on again.
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/24 04:59 AM
10

A man will sacrifice his happiness for his family. A woman will sacrifice her family for her happiness. That’s all you need to know.
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/24 02:00 AM
2

This is NOT going to work. She trained you to be a provider ONLY. For years (decades?) she’s been able to do WTF she felt like with little to no pushback. People don’t change unless 1) they have no choice or 2) it’s forced upon them in such a way as they’re going to be adversely impacted to a significant extent. (Like homeless, starving, etc.). Your list is not going to happen. It’s wishful thinking. She doesn’t love you, likely doesn’t like you either. You’re Johnny Paycheck. She’s not going to…
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/24 01:53 AM
1

I’m soooooooo tempted by the thought that when I see them both together, I should shake his hand and say “Hey, we got a lot in common. We should go out for a beer together sometime!”. My ex- would be mortified! 😉
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/24 09:45 PM
2

I’d “light her very short fuse” somewhere where she gets caught on camera going after you yet again. Likely make the divorce easier in the courts.
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/24 09:18 PM
1

She needed another “nice guy” to direct in life. Neither of us had good family models, but hers was worse. Made her selfish. I’ll be interested to see if he lasts. I heard she even had to pack him up and get him to jettison a bunch of shit to move into her house. She’s already doing to him what she did to me, backstabbing him to others instead of addressing any issues. It’s only been a few weeks too. 🤣
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/24 08:52 PM
2

Grey divorcee here. My ex-w has a new BF. I know for a fact a few other guys had already dumped her. I guess the one she MOVED into her house, even though divorced, was not bright enough to see her red flags. And right about the 3 year mark.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/24 10:41 PM
1

Took me about a day of self teaching to learn to scull at a rudimentary level. Spend a few months at it and you’ll look like those guys you see in movie backgrounds. Keep your nails cut REAL short when you start. Thank me later.
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/24 10:08 PM
0

I’m a guy and I’ll say the opposite. You try to stick it out for the kids and try to make it better overall. At least until they get older.
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/24 07:04 PM
1

You every try rowing a scull (one man boat)? I can tell you it is one of the most zen things I ever did. It’s all early AM stuff. I’m sure there are clubs near you. Or maybe get in an 8 as part of a team. Of all things I’ve done in life, I’d rank sculling as one I truly miss. https://www.miamirowing.org
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/24 06:51 PM
1

Post divorce I can afford to do pretty much anything, but I’m a grey divorce and all those torn parts you talk of…yeah, got a lot of “structural” issues. (BTW, get as many of those fixed when younger as they get worse when older). Anyway, I’m taking up the flute. I’ve had drums & bass guitars, but I need something far less taxing on my body. You’ll understand this one day. Ever consider archery? It’s challenging, solid initial investment of $6-1500 and your done. Can do it in plenty of places. C…
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/24 06:46 PM
1

It’s amazing how once you leave 50/50, dads just get hammered.
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/24 05:35 PM
4

I’m going to refer you to the YouTube channel of John Griffon. Lots of YouTube men’s channels, but his is pretty grounded with messages you need to hear.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/24 08:03 PM
2

Record and save EVERY conversation. Upload them all to the cloud. Keep a daily schedule of even the most mundane events like “drive kids to school”. You want to account for all time and actions in case she makes up some bullshit to get you falsely charged.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/24 08:01 PM
3

PLEASE understand she is now “the enemy”. No weepy eyes in this process. She has ZERO respect for you, the family, or anything else. You are nothing but a future paycheck. That’s it bubba. Nothing more. If you have to deal with her in person over anything you best have a VAR (voice activated recorder) running in a shirt pocket. Do not meet her in any private places if one of you has left the house. YOU do not leave the house. Do not put it past her to try and destroy your military career with fa…
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/24 07:58 PM
11

My ex- once commented to the effect “What happened to the guy who used to be afraid of nothing?” Marriage. That’s what happened.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/24 07:47 PM
6

“Love is blind” as they say. She is in the limerence stage of a relationship. Nothing he does is wrong. She has idealized him as the answer, and you as the problem. Likely she pushed to open the marriage and you agreed hoping it would save it. In the meantime you were her Plan B while she felt out Plan A. “He” is not your “friend”. He’s an opportunistic loser happy to get some free ass. She is clearly not wife material as she cannot distinguish a real partnership from “the butterflies”. Her blam…
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/24 06:10 AM
2

When I got my divorce, we used one lawyer (mine). I’m sure much of the work was done by a paralegal. I was correcting all kinds of crap after they did a c&p of what I provided. Through several revisions. When I sold a business, the buyers had an attorney draw up the purchase agreement. There was junk in there from prior deals. I edited it all up, sent it back. Some got fixed (likely by a paralegal) and other stuff was simply ignored/forgotten so I fixed it again. By the third time I got the offe…
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/24 07:02 PM
2

Some may interpret you as “plucky”, some may just treat you on the merits of what you file, others will become highly resentful and wait for that opportunity to cut you off at the knees. Be careful.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/24 06:35 PM
3

You need to take control of your time. If not the ex- will get full custody via parental alienation.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/24 06:28 PM
1

It’s a big club and you ain’t in it. All the judges and attorneys know each other. You know none of them.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/24 06:20 PM
6

Anything you share gets shared with her. Build your case in silence. Record (VAR), document etc accordingly.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/24 06:15 PM
5

We were only together for ~ 2-3 weeks post D-day. Then she did what she always did best, took off on trips elsewhere. She knew I wasn’t going to fight over the house as she loved it and it wasn’t worth the fight to me. Just part of the asset division. I had roughly 2.5 months to move out without her there. I made it. I could have stayed longer but really, why? Found & partially remodeled a home in that time. I had a friend where her lawyer kept the meter running asking for all kinds of bullshit,…
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/24 06:57 AM
6

~50% of marriages end in divorce with 70-80% of those initiated by the women. That leaves the other 50%. Of those I’d only guess half are not b necessary happy, but not so miserable as to call it quits. Some may be married for economic reasons only. So maybe, again I’m only guessing, 25% of marriages are in a positive footing. The question then becomes what makes those work? There are a number of reasons: 1) excellent communication by both partners 2) shared ideas, ideals & values 3) likely both…
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/24 06:49 AM
1

Check for anywhere Southwest Air will get you cheap. And while I don’t know if they fly there, I’d suggest a drive from Miami down the Keys & back.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/24 06:37 AM
1

No kidding!
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/24 01:50 AM
2

If she has a college degree, unless it is in something worthless like basket weaving, a COURT will impute an income level for her regardless of her experience provided the degree is rather current. This would decrease any alimony for which you might be on the hook. Even if you both come to an agreement on child support, if it is less that what the state uses in their formula, even post divorce she can go to court and ask for more. In your position, I would do only one thing right now. Ask her to…
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/24 06:48 AM
1

Life is going to hand her a rude awakening soon enough.
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/24 06:33 AM
4

Getting there as well. Not even motivated to date.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/24 09:16 AM
4

I grew up with a full blown NPD mother. Didn’t figure it out until my 50’s. I believe I’ve met four true NPD personalities in my 60+ years on this planet, two male & two female. Like everything else this has become pop psychology, easy answer blame shifting. Every person has some narcissism in them. However by clinical definition, not may people fit the true psychological definition of a narcissist.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/24 03:37 AM
5

Amazingly I’m going to take up flute in my 60’s. Should get one delivered tomorrow. I’ve played some drums, and some bass. Wanted to pick up something that’s just plain “light” on the body. Something I can do sitting in a chair, and something easy on the joints. Also very easy to take on trips.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/24 02:18 AM
5

If you stay, you get a post-nuptial. Strays or divorces you before the kids reach adulthood, she gets nothing.
/r/Divorce_Men04/12/24 02:51 PM
1

You’re in WA, she’s the breadwinner, you the caregiver. Knew a couple like you two. He divorced her. Kids stayed in the house with him. There was some joint custody. Unsure of how the finances worked but I recall her saying it split out around 58/42 in his favor. Don’t be cowed by her. Get a lawyer. Do nothing to make her life easier in this.
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/24 06:36 PM
14

Do NOT leave the house. Tell her she’s free to leave. Then file.
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/24 06:13 PM
3

If you’re military and he was military, by all means let the service know.
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/24 04:48 PM
2

It’s time for a counseling session (or series) to discuss this in a “safe” environment (for her). Furthermore, it sounds like you have the bank to actually hire someone to prep meals for your family. That might be an impetus to changing her size. There are lots of reasons people get fat. Some hormonal, some chemical. Some addictive, but most tied go psychological issues where food becomes a crutch and reward system. She likely needs counseling more than a dietitian. Your comment about her keepin…
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/24 03:33 AM
8

There is nothing good that can come out of this. You may be accused of assault to further her accusations. She may try to get you to agree to something and later harangue you if you won’t sign off on it.
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/24 01:42 AM
21

That’s a big no. My friends don’t include liars, cheaters and backstabbers so why would she be my friend?
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/24 01:37 AM
3

Absolutely this.
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/24 05:23 PM
14

As a child we had a wood burning fireplace. From the time I was six years old on I would put wood in there and poke at the embers. Her ridiculous helicopter parenting scheme is an affront to kids growing up to be self-functioning entities.
/r/Divorce_Men28/11/24 05:10 PM
6

Could this be “like mother, like daughter”? Whatever bad traits your ex- had will likely be modeled for your daughter as normal behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men27/11/24 05:52 AM
8

This reads like a co-dependent relationship. Go visit YouTube for more info.
/r/Divorce_Men27/11/24 05:45 AM
1

Is there a “happy medium” for the near term? You have a child, stay where you are, and make do with the current space? He gets what he wants, and you both get a child. I would think the children aspect is the most important part of this impasse. You obviously could continue to live in NY. Your father really has nothing to do with your relationship with your husband. This is a common thing women do when they don’t get their way, they “rally the troops” (family or especially girlfriends) to suppor…
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/24 09:16 PM
11

It is only to your benefit to get an attorney immediately for so many reasons list below… Plus one more… Your attorney can slow this process Wayyyy Down. Heck you could get them to drag it out for two years via various delays, court rescheduling, etc. This gives you more time to have more time with your kids to demonstrate you should be a 50/50 dad. More time to save up cash, more time for pretty much everything. And yes, this comes with a financial price, but in your case this may well be worth…
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/24 12:38 PM
5

Bro’, I feel the need to point something out to you. Trump used to be a Democrat. His “team” of advisors were mostly all Democrats (Musk, Gabbard, Kennedy). These people didn’t become Republicans, it’s that the Democrats lurched down the far left, they ended up on the right side of the divide. I’m not a fan of Trump, but the woke insanity of the Biden years has to go. What you have is not a new crew of republicans, but a crew of democrats with the same value system of D’s in the 60’s (and I grew…
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/24 12:30 PM
7

You have the right attitude. Social media and Online Dating (OD) has corrupted the traditional process of meeting and getting married. Women of low value are convinced they’re of high value because of the affirmation of OD. Hookup culture reinforces that belief even though the reality is it’s destroying the value of women for men. Meanwhile, just like we’ve been thru the race hustlers in the past, we now live through the social media influencers hustles coupled with acquiesce to the insanity of …
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/24 12:17 PM
2

Add the YouTube channel of John Griffon , as well as the channel psychacks
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/24 11:43 AM
2

You gotta do what you gotta do. In many respects she’s no longer your problem.
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/24 11:17 PM
5

I periodically throw this up in some posts here. I suggest you spend a lot of time on the John Griffin YouTube channel to simply give you a wider perspective. Outside that, I would NEVER meet her without a VAR or even a body cam on. Ever. All pickups and drops at a neutral place, no houses unless it’s a grandparent that can be neutral.
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/24 10:36 PM
3

Better he does it before he is formally served. After all, they’re 50/50 partners. Technically he could take it all.
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/24 10:30 PM
7

RIGHT NOW, and I mean the minute you f’n see this: 1) get ALL important papers out of the house 2) get ALL tools you may need out of the house, as well as any heirlooms or items of significant value 3) open a new checking account in your name only and have direct deposit set up for it immediately 4) divide any accounts you have, and take 50% out of all of them 5) get a VAR to carry on you all the time and upload every day of recording to the cloud. 6) put a VAR in every vehicle with your name at…
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/24 08:43 PM
5

You’ll understand a lot more after a few hours of listening to him. Might try Psychacks channel too. The #1 takeaway is women are wired nothing like men. Don’t ever expect rational thought, allegiance, or devotion. They’re slaves to their emotional needs, which are their reality at any given time. Actual reality need not intrude.
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/24 10:07 PM
1

Sorry, Griffin.
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/24 08:32 PM
3

We have all ended up here in this forum for the very same reason. I suggest you spend some time on YouTube watching the channel by John Griffon. He will teach you quite a bit.
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/24 08:00 PM
3

It’s no different.
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/24 07:38 PM
16

You need an attitude re-adjustment. I want you to think about how YOU would feel if you dumped a date, and she kept pleading to be with you? Would you want her? Would you RESPECT her? Don’t ever do this again. It shows weakness as a man, not strength.
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/24 07:27 PM
11

“A man will sacrifice his happiness for the sake of his family. A woman will destroy her family for the sake of her happiness.” If you have such a huge percentage of custody, go after her for child support once the ink is dry and get that alimony back. I especially feel for your kids. Mm chooses another guy over them and moves 6 hours away. Yeesh
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/24 04:18 PM
2

Think about it. For 13 years she and the kid (plus job) were the focus of your life. Now you’re in a position of having to refocus. You have no control over time allocated to your son, she is gone, and I can only surmise that like many guys everything else got pushed aside for family. Now there is no “family”. So what is really the focus? You had a plan, and that plan has been toasted. I can tell you to get in the gym, pick up new hobbies, whatever…the same thing others tell you. And that’s all …
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/24 07:52 AM
3

Sometimes it just takes time. Two years post divorce I had pretty much figured everything out. I was “good”, but not “great”. Now three years past divorce I finally feel genuinely happy. I don’t know how to explain it other than I feel as if I’ve finally shed the past (35 years together) and become myself. You’re looking for “an” answer. Realistically the answer lies within, and it will eventually come out.
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/24 03:48 AM
3

She already cost you plenty, and a full on divorce could conceivably cost you plenty more. Cut a deal for $X/month for 6 months. Leave the pets with her. Leave all the furniture with her. Move to someplace super cheap for a year and chalk this all up to expensive education. If she pushes for more explain to her that a court will impute her income, that her very best alimony hope would be nine months, but likely zero given the duration of the marriage, and that all the items you’re leaving with h…
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/24 06:21 PM
7

1) If you are out of the house get back in there NOW. She cannot prevent you from living in your own home. 2) have a VAR (voice activated recorder) on you at all times. Upload every day to the cloud in case she tries to claim assault or abuse. 3) get a lawyer immediately. As in take a day or two off work and find a good one. Try to file First to set the narrative. 4) keep a written diary of everything you do with the kids. Take pictures of every outing. 5) if you can get your employer to allow y…
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/24 09:49 PM
2

Absolutely this.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 09:37 AM
11

There’s a YouTube channel I encourage you to visit NOW for a bit more enlightenment to female nature. (Actually several but I think this guy has the message you really need to hear). It’s @john-griffin What’s happened to you has happened to almost every one of us here. Mine ended almost 3.5 years ago but I come here to help support and “red-pill” guys like you who feel blindsided and worthless. PLEASE do NOT define yourself by her actions. Women are not like men, not wired like men, don’t think …
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 03:07 AM
1

Get yourself a 12 pack of long necks. Find an abandoned building. Drink one, break it on the wall. Keep going until totally drunk.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 01:45 AM
4

I’ve never been to divorce court (managed to avoid it), but here’s what I learned from a few stops in traffic court. Spell it out in pictures! You will get another day in court. By that time you need to be ready to submit pictures of stubs, whatever with clear, large print indicating what you need to have seen and acknowledged. In your case I’d have a check blown up with the net pay box in color and something like “2x per month”. I’d also have copies of all checking account deposits with the pay…
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/24 08:42 PM
3

Just with the filing of my divorce MY credit took an immediate drop of 40+ points. Hers? Zero impact. Likely because FICO knows men routinely get the financial shaft.
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/24 08:31 PM
2

You gotta play to win! Seriously, why the hell not try? Worst is it doesn’t happen. Best is you become a mentor to others.
/r/Divorce_Men07/11/24 03:47 PM
3

Get a VAR (voice activated recorder) and carry it on you from now forward. This is to protect against DV accusations. Get all important documents, arms, tools, heirlooms, etc out of the house into somewhere else NOW in case she pulls a DV (domestic violence) charge on you. Separate finances. Take 1/2 of everything and put it in new accounts in your name only. Get direct deposit changed to your new account. Cancel all joint credit cards Change all subscriptions passwords, all email passwords. Mak…
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/24 09:13 PM
6

Your best play right now is to drag this past her graduation. At that point she has an imputed income potential. Even better to drag it until she gets a job.
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/24 09:02 PM
1

Three months after out decree was signed I was at 144/88. Now three years after it was signed I’m at 112/77. I’d have your bf send a registered letter of documentation of payout to the lawyer involved. If he was the one who put the lien on, I’d not that his next letter will be to the state bar and he’ll retain an attorney to get this settled, including suing her for all attorney fees.
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/24 05:22 PM
17

Got divorced 3 years ago. Check your BP now, and check it again a year from now. I bet it drops.
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/24 09:29 PM
1

My ex- will always paint herself to be the victim. I’m well aware that’s she said stuff behind my back that are outright lies. I could play this game back by telling everyone how she’s a cheater and a liar. Instead, I make sure in a roundabout way that I let women she knows know that “she called it quits. I offered counseling but she declined so it was over.” I do this because I know she has told people I abandoned her (not true) and it’s my polite way of saying she’s a liar before any of them e…
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/24 04:59 PM
3

Go roam these two sites for ideas of what she may have planted: https://www.palmvid.com/palmvid-wifi-series-aircleaner-3-hidden-camera-pvairclean-wifi-3.html https://deluxecctv.com/shop/
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/24 05:59 AM
4

Response above was excellent! There’s no such think as being half pregnant, or in half a relationship. She made a choice. She’s scared by this choice, and having you as a crutch she can run back to if it doesn’t work is her best of all worlds. You’re not being “supportive” in a way that benefits you, you’re only being supportive in a way that benefits her. It should be obvious by now she doesn’t actually care about how YOU feel, only how she feels. She wants half a marriage—emotional support on …
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/24 07:20 AM
12

Congratulations, you get your life back! Imagine dedicating more years to someone’s care who doesn’t give a shit about you. Be free!
/r/Divorce_Men01/11/24 07:36 PM
5

Had a friend who got divorced a few years ago from his true NPD wife (I had to educate him on her). He was afraid he’d never find someone again. He did, and after some issues resolved they got married & make a nice couple. I told him this weekend I just don’t think I’ll be following his road. Too peaceful now.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/24 05:06 AM
8

Right here. You’re a year behind me. Only found one woman I really liked but it didn’t fly. Now no desire to even try. Retired, got tons of “cash”, and enjoying the peace. Only ever on one dating site and most of the women look pretty scary when you get up to my age. The few dates I went on were no one (but one) I’d ever have any long term interest in seeing. Took a bit of time to get used to this but now not having any retreats.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/24 05:03 AM
8

For decades my BP was around 128/86. Now post divorce is around 110/72. While I was stressed at the start, life is much more peaceful now.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/24 04:58 AM
4

You don’t mention kids. Assuming none, best to get out immediately. If you later have kids she’ll do this again & that is a much harder road to go down. Think about it solely this way… do you want a woman you cannot trust who does not respect you?
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/24 02:08 AM
3

If you think it’s coming, prepare accordingly. Don’t wait to react.
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/24 02:01 AM
1

Mine were ~2.5 & 4yrs old. I fought for their sake, and I guess for mine too. Financially it would have destroyed me for life.
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/24 03:37 AM
1

And risk having random guys dragged thru your kids lives by a mentally unstable woman seeking attention? Sorry, kids meant too much to me
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/24 03:28 AM
1

It varies (crazy, right?) from consulate to consulate. That said, you need to demonstrate either a regular income stream of X many thousands per month, OR, demonstrate X many hundreds of thousands in savings. In the latter case I believe it’s around $425k. But you really have to check a consulate site for exact numbers. There are also some age limitations but I’m already around retirement age so that had no impact on me. unlike the US, Mexico is very interested in "migrants" that will not be a f…
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/24 03:17 AM
2

Put together enough assets so when you hit late 50’s/early 60’s you both can retire to Mexico. Then just stuff her.
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/24 06:34 AM
10

Three years post “grey divorce”. Told the ex- a few weeks ago “I cut people out of my life who have no respect for me”. Took most of two years post split for me to analyze my marriage, me, her, etc. neither one of us was perfect, but I was not a liar or cheater like her. Fortunately dodged the entire alimony/child support thing by staying with her after she destroyed “us” with an affair. Stayed for the kids, would do it again. I’m basically more introverted, so my life is pretty peaceful now. Ha…
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/24 06:30 AM
2

You don’t have enough to get Mexican permanent residency, that I know for sure.
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/24 05:12 AM
3

There’s a Reddit sub r/NMMNG as well
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/24 05:10 AM
2

Did you retire before it after the filing? She file? What state? I would think there’s a case to be made that you physically/emotionally could no longer work for health reasons. That it’s impossible for you to make the same income again even if you wanted to work again. And that if she filed after you retired, she was well aware of your future income.
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/24 05:09 AM
6

I doubt my ex-wife would do a thing to help me based on her behavior during times I had health issues. So if she were having health issues now I wouldn’t lift a finger to help her. If yours would help you, you might consider if for the sake of your son. However if she were destructive and insensitive I’d say pass.
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/24 03:14 AM
3

Here you go. https://oceanofpdf.com/genres/nonfiction/pdf-epub-the-manipulated-man-download/
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/24 06:27 PM
1

She no longer needs a husband. She needs a paycheck/cook/mechanic/gardener/babysitter/handyman/ maid/chauffeur/errand boy. You appear absolutely perfect for the job. On top of it all, she has ZERO respect for you or your feelings/concerns. And you honestly think this self-centered, entitled harpy is going to “love you” again?
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/24 08:58 AM
1

If you can afford it, just let it go.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/24 02:08 AM
6

Let EVERYONE know. Not in a mean way. Don’t let her control the narrative. She needs to experience responsibility for her decision.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/24 01:59 AM
4

I had a friend in the same situation. His ex- wanted HIS dog. She was a true NPD wench. It was punishment she could file out. He let the dog go. There comes a time where you sacrifice to stop the insanity. My ex- had a small dog. It was more an accessory than a real pet. When we split I gave that dog 6 months before she put it down as it was old, and sometimes went in the house. Though that was literally nothing a few paper towels wouldn’t clean up. I was wrong. She took 8 months to put it down.…
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/24 08:23 PM
6

Have you checked cell phone records? Got ahold of her phone? Is she hiding her phone so you can never see it? The “switch” usually flips with the entrance of another man, or menopause.
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 08:38 PM
2

Talk to your lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 08:30 PM
15

I’m never going to make an excuse for bad behavior by a wife, but I got a related story to share. I had an employee whom I like very much. She was my bookkeeper. Married, had a kid. Husband definitely a menial labor guy but a good man. She needed a hysterectomy before she was thirty. Needed a bunch of time off. I paid her for many weeks, AND I had to do her job as well. She comes back and she’s definitely “different”. I mean like a while different personality. Really all messed up. Having mental…
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 05:22 AM
2

When THEY want something, they want it NOW. When you want something… meh.
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 01:54 AM
8

Regret the divorce she wanted? No. Regret staying with her as long as I did? Yes. Regret staying with a cheater for the sake of my kids? No. Regret not putting us both into therapy for a year? Yes.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/24 07:40 AM
3

Your credit score is now so poor it’s meaningless. There is no reason to try to salvage anything, you should just file for bankruptcy. Wipe the slate clean. Yes, you’ll have no credit cards, but that is likely a positive in your life. Just make sure you don’t go negative on your bank account or pass bad checks as then you’ll get debanked and have a truly serious problem. It is possible to negotiate with credit card companies. Feel free to DM me if you like on that aspect.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/24 08:17 PM
1

I don’t know how legal separation works there, but if possible I’d do the following: 1) try to ensure she is not “wasting assets” 2) make her responsible for all her spending 3) cancel any joint credit cards 4) protect any joint assets
/r/Divorce_Men17/10/24 04:57 AM
3

Like Nike said, “Just do it.”
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 06:57 PM
1

She has everything she wants right now. A house, all expenses paid, no “you” in her life, and only one child to deal with (that I assume is 13-16 yrs old). It’s a perfect life. She has her money, and she has your money. Nothing will now fix this beyond divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 06:55 PM
3

You need a VAR and possibly some hidden trail cams around your property. I can see this leading to DV accusations.
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/24 07:04 PM
4

If it were the other way around she would 💯go for all the support she could get. Do not waiver on this.
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/24 06:45 PM
4

Not only that, but even in a HCOL area, a house sale will leave you BOTH with sufficient cash to buy condos. Someone above mentioned dragging things out until kid is 18 yrs and that makes sense. Under that scenario your kid does not “need” to live in a house. You really want your disentangle yourself as much as possible from her and joint assets.
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/24 04:08 PM
–

With women it’s like football. You’re only as good as the last pass you caught. Anything good from the past is meaningless.
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/24 07:46 PM
2

If this is highly contentious request all communication through an app. No calls, texts, or emails. Only an app. Keeps a great record all in one place.
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/24 06:00 PM
2

Get an online parenting app. Restrict all communication other than medical emergencies to that app. Answer no calls, accept no texts or emails. You also might want a (hidden) body cam for all exchanges.
/r/Divorce_Men13/10/24 05:15 AM
7

The explanation is likely there’s another guy and she doesn’t want to tell you.
/r/Divorce_Men13/10/24 04:10 AM
1

I hope she’s seen pictures of the finished product
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 08:18 PM
10

1) report this incident to “authorities” 2) send a copy to your lawyer to submit to the court 3) go for more custody under fear of her mental stability 4) ask your lawyer to force a psych evaluation on her
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 08:13 PM
2

This. OM is WHY she moved out.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 07:54 PM
4

11/1? 🤣🤣🤣. Add to the agreement you’ll leave the house after it’s signed off by the court AND you want a $5k relocation payment for your troubles.
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/24 11:31 PM
5

I know my ex- leaned heaving on a divorced friend when she called it quits. Not sure the friend was the instigator.
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/24 11:28 PM
10

What you’re dealing with is a total lack of respect. She considers you a joke with her family. There can be no relationship when there is a lack of respect.
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/24 07:32 AM
3

In the end, in most states, assets end up 50/50. It’s just horse trading for who wants what. CC debt is joint as well.
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/24 09:59 PM
10

Do NOT count on mortgage rates going down. Do NOT tie yourself to property with her where you gain no benefit. Inflation has not gone away. It may never. There may never be 5.5% mortgages. Force a house sale or she gives up in other ways.
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/24 09:54 PM
2

OP needs to see 10 years of tax returns as well
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/24 07:20 PM
13

Don’t define yourself by your partner. And, you can’t make someone else happy.
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/24 07:22 AM
5

Who “enabled” all this cheating? Someone had to be watching the kids. Or were these just opportunistic hook ups? Likely she knows which guy gave her the clap. Any laws in your state concerning passing it on? Do, or will, your kids end up knowing she was the town bicycle? If you’re going to check out, I highly suggest you be strategic about this. Some states are more “divorce friendly” than others. You’ll want your get yourself re-stationed to one of those. Preferably where adulterous affairs wil…
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/24 06:16 PM
1

☝️This. My ex- cheated decades ago. It literally ripped me apart. I fought for my children. I hung in there knowing she was calling the asshole likely every day. She felt so empowered. She said things no many who loves his wife & family should ever hear. Finally, one night after we had gone out and had a decent time, we got home and I told her “You need to stop this shit now.” In response I got a “But I love him sooooo much!”. I lost my shit on her for the first time ever. Verbally unloaded on h…
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/24 01:54 AM
2

You’re in a very emotional time right now. Some of what you read here may make no sense to you but I assure you it’s all very sensible. Your wife is “gone”. At any point she could outright become the “enemy”, especially if her GF’s convince her she is due more. Tying all your wealth to a huge house full of memories is both fiscally and mentally a poor choice. It’s time to move on. Split everything down the middle. You make your financial choices, she makes hers.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 10:41 PM
9

Run. She’s already got an exit plan.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 06:40 PM
21

I hope you’re in a state with “permanent alimony” and you get every nickel out of her that you can.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/24 09:42 PM
14

1) NO alcohol 2) YES gym 3) you “had” a plan, now it’s time to think up a new one. Short, medium, long term goals. 4) we are headed into a downturn. It may be hard to find work. Sign up with temp help agencies.
/r/Divorce_Men30/09/24 02:02 AM
5

My ex- told me she was telling everyone our divorce was a mutual decision. A total lie. She was good at lying. I stopped caring. How do you care for someone you know is outright assassinating you behind your back.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/24 04:38 PM
1

Well, if you had it in you, you could try to “save” dad. He’d need to see a lot of YouTube videos about NPD and have her behavior compared to them. Then if he can find his backbone, he could divorce mom. That could really explode reality.
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/24 09:36 PM
1

You cannot fix that. And if she has her hooks into her daughter it would take serious counseling for quite some time for the daughter to even accept what her mother is, let alone understand she is mimicking her mother’s behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/24 09:02 PM
3

The MIL sounds like someone who truly has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Go watch some YouTube videos. You’re describing my mother.
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/24 08:52 PM
1

Went on a few dates. One shows up and the date literally goes pear shaped. As in she was literally pear shaped. I was nice, we chatted, I bought us a cheap pizza. She was obviously not very bright. Asked her how online dating was going for her, and she tells me not very good. Says she can’t understand why as she thinks she’s pretty cute. (In what fucking universe?!)
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 04:09 PM
2

THE most important thing if you do get vaccines are to S P A C E them out. Do not let the Peds push a standard schedule. A young child is not as resilient as as an adult. You might want to contact the Children’s Health Defense for more guidance.
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 06:01 AM
-5

I wholly disagree on the vaccine thing. I’m in my 60’s. I got a handful as a kid and survived all these years. Now they want to jab kids like 72 times before they become an adult, sometimes with multiple doses when they’re still very small. It is totally unnecessary. The Amish do not vax their children. Incidence of autism in that population is nil, while it continues to climb amongst the rest of the U.S. population. There is tremendous financial incentive for pediatric docs to give vaccines. Th…
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 05:57 AM
5

They’re your children too. Don’t give up on them. As to bring over dinner and them disappearing, that is every reason to actually cook dinner with them helping. You need some bonding time, not electronic babysitters. You are the parent. Finally, I don’t know where you live, but there are always alternative housing arrangements you can look into. If you live near the water, it may be cheaper to rent a boat slip and buy a boat for a live-aboard. You can also look into mobile home parks. What’s mos…
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 05:46 AM
6

I’m about 3 years past our physical separation. I rarely think of mine anymore. When I do, I mostly get mad at myself for devoting my life to a lying, cheating ingrate. I spent most of two years in self-analysis dissecting our marriage, her, me, etc. When I finally understood it all, my head really cleared up.
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 05:36 AM
3

Mine ended in my early 60’s after a total of 35 years together. All the changes to routine is quite a hit upside the head. And as an introvert, I’ve never really needed a lot of people. When the wife is gone, the one constant was gone. Didn’t help that she tells lies about it all, but whatever. You know how to do all the faulting stuff, now you need to learn how to clear your head. Despite her issues, the routine is gone. The adjustment will take time. It’s important to have people to talk to, o…
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 05:33 AM
1

Got friends? Buy all their meals, let them pay you in cash. Same for groceries etc.
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/24 03:57 PM
10

I know a couple, long married, grown kids in their 30’s no less. Per my ex-wife “she never loved him”. Is genuinely nasty to him. Puts him down in front of others. They almost split a few years ago but he hung in there. He should have left. She’ll never care about him. You dodged a bullet brother. You could have been with her until a time where maybe you had a health issue, and she’d just look at you the way a kid looks at a bug. Or worse, she could have had a health issue, and you’d be playing …
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/24 03:51 PM
3

If their family model was shitty, you can bet they’re going to repeat it.
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 04:27 PM
5

This. There is no reality, always just fantasy.
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 04:25 PM
2

You gotta do what works for you.
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 09:23 AM
2

Hah! I had a date that went pear shaped from the first moment. As in she showed up and was literally pear shaped. I was still polite and bought us Dominos for dinner and we are on a bench in front. I asked her how dating was going for her. She told me not so well, and she thought she was pretty cute ‼️ All I could think of was “in what universe?”
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 04:48 AM
1

Do NOT pay her off early!!! Inflation is eating away at her purchasing power. We’ve been thru Wave One of inflation, there WILL be a second, and likely a third. The money you don’t pay her could earn you 8%, while the money you pay her by year three will likely have lost 10% in purchasing power or more.
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 04:37 AM
1

After a 32 yr marriage & 35 years together, my now ex- wanted a divorce 3+ years ago. I’ve done a little bit of dating, found one woman I liked, but she opted out when I told her sex was mandatory. (And she NEEDED to get married to permanently escape CAN). I’m pretty much an introvert, so I need little overt people stimulus. A few minutes a day can be enough. I expect I’ll be alone to the end, and that’s okay. I have a great dog for now, though his days are numbered. I’ll likely get another one …
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 04:29 AM
3

At $500/hr, that’s roughly 1400 hours of work, or 2/3 of a regular work year. Can’t even remotely be honest
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/24 04:13 PM
5

“We have a signed and agreed to divorce agreement. You are purposefully turning down my assistance with OUR child to your own personal detriment. This is a choice you are solely making. I cannot be responsible for your choices. If you would allow me to be the involved parent I seek to be, perhaps your life would be less stressful.” Via text
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/24 08:34 PM
1

As others said, this takes time. Outside of that, you need some goals. Something you work towards. Short, medium and long term. When you have those you can implement a plan of action to achieve them.
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/24 11:17 PM
1

I dropped you a DM about this. Be sure to read it.
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/24 02:31 AM
2

Inflation is not going away. Do NOT lump sum pay her.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 06:40 PM
2

I stayed with a cheater to avoid that issue. I feel for you. I’ve never told my kids about it, but there are times I’m very tempted, as I know she lies about me regularly .
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 02:02 AM
4

It is FAR better to cut people out of your life who have no respect for you than to allow them to remain. I cut my ex- wife out. We spoke the other day about our kids (though the call was about a joint expense) and she tried to play coy about “Have you talked to the kids recently?” I told her I talk to one every week. She knows I’m not talking to the other and was “sad” about it. I told her “well XX has the same problem you do, no respect for me so I cut people out of my life who have no respect…
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 04:55 PM
15

What kind of “friends” don’t tell you?
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 02:41 AM
16

A man will sacrifice his happiness for his family. A woman will sacrifice her family for her happiness. This is all you really need to know. She’s addicted to attention and thrill. Stability & relationship mean nothing. Whatever she was, she is now a broken person. YOU cannot fix broken people. Get a lawyer and get things underway before you start earning anything. It’s to your advantage to do so. She will not change. And if you keep her around she may one day pass something on to you that you c…
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 09:47 PM
1

Her retirement account & mine were roughly equal. No distribution from either. Process by us took 6 months by statute
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 09:11 PM
1

There ARE options in common law marriage. It’s only acknowledged after a specific length of time and one part would have to pursue it. Up until that time, you are roommates and not technically financially tied. Though that could be challenged in court.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 08:07 PM
1

In some states after a specified period of time you ARE a common law marriage
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 08:04 PM
1

And you may end up in a “common law marriage” in the end.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 07:59 PM
1

Why “this” church? Can you not worship God elsewhere? MUST you adhere to a bunch of people (especially feminists) whose wishes are not in your best interest? I suggest you look up “Stockholm Syndrome”. Despite your understanding of what you’re dealing with you still want to identify with a process that is clearly not in your best interest. I want you to think about this next bit deeply: you get only one life, do you truly believe you should outsource your agency to a bunch of people who clearly …
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 07:25 PM
3

I’m not going to make light of your religious beliefs, but I really have to ask if a bunch of people with a “rules” book 📕 is how you want to run your life? There are lots of churches/religions that are not so strict. I believe it is good to have faith, it keeps one grounded. However the church will not be there to bail you out if it goes sideways. It all falls upon your shoulders. Doesn’t seem like a very fair way to be accepted by others …
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 04:34 PM
3

Then do not marry.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 04:30 PM
1

No need to talk to her unless it’s about fair & equal distribution. I did all the work dividing and selling assets. We used my attorney once she found out all she could get was 50/50. There was some conversation, a few meetings between us, and some final tangible asset distribution the day before we completed signatures. It was all cordial. He not responding to court papers is a huge positive for you. If you get luck she never shows up, and the court gives you what you want.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 04:29 PM
6

Just remember these things: 1) this is a game of Russian Roulette with 3 of 6 chambers loaded, 2) women are often perpetual children in need of attention, and will take it from anywhere (or anyone) who offers it, 3) if any of her friends divorce, your odds go up significantly, 4) like football, you’re only as good as the last pass you caught (there is zero loyalty for prior good deeds — no reserve of goodwill like with guys), 5) girls night out or trips are open doors to potential cheating, 6) l…
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 04:24 PM
2

One more thing. You can “complicate” property or a business. If you make, say, your father a 5% owner of something. That can stymie any attempt to force sell that asset. At the time you do it you get a notarized release from him you keep in a safe deposit box.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 04:16 PM
3

When my ex- wanted a divorce, we were both in a 50/50 state, both retired. I pointedly told her not to let her GF’s pump her head full of 💩as if she tried to make things difficult, I’d make sure she got much less than 50/50. She mostly played nice. She got about 52/48 as a result
/r/Divorce_Men06/09/24 07:07 PM
1

I’m currently camping in a Taxa Cricket (see YouTube). They fit inside a standard garage. It’s not big, but throw an extra pad in there and it’s comfy. I DO have a house, and of good size, but I could honestly live in this thing for a long time if I had to, top up or down. And I have a big dog in it too. For a shower, I pay at campgrounds every few days but mostly camp cheap or free. With a health club membership you’d have consistent showers. If you can get a small camper that you can fit in a …
/r/Divorce_Men06/09/24 06:44 PM
8

They just make bad decisions. My ex- left with millions. We never really fought over anything. I was a good provider, she a bad wife (liar, cheater). She finally called it due to lack of emotional engagement by me. Yeah, no shit. You’re a liar, a cheater, self absorbed, unaccountable, and literally anything I tell you I may as well just put up on a billboard. But I’m not emotionally available. Well DUH! You’re not emotionally trustworthy. I swear, I wish someone had told me marriage meant being …
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/24 03:42 AM
3

I met a woman not long ago where she needed to get married & I thought we had a good match. Prenups would be put in place but I still was taking on risk to marry her. I told her there would be sex involved. That became a deal breaker for her. Now image this. We are now both in our 60’s. She’s 2.5 years older. She “needs” to get married. She’s in much better physical shape, and I’m in much much better fiscal shape. She can literally walk into a nice house in a nice community and have no responsib…
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/24 03:35 AM
27

Women will believe almost anything from anyone except the man they married.
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/24 03:27 AM
4

My ex- and I had to speak by phone the other day. I told her I don’t speak to her or one of our kids (all grown) because I cut people out of my life who don’t respect me. She starts telling me it’s not true, and she does respect me. To prove it she wants me to be the first one to know she’s moving a boyfriend into her house. Said I deserved to know before it was rumor in our community. Funny thing is I could care less what she does with whom. The respect I really wanted would have come by not ch…
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 09:51 PM
2

Worth every penny to save the lives of your kids.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 09:44 PM
1

I went on a journey of self-discovery after my “grey divorce”. I literally immersed myself in learning about me & my actions, her and hers, our parent models, etc etc. most of two years. I wanted answers. One day someone passed an article on to me here on Reddit that was the capstone to my journey. It wrapped up everything for me. I’ve been at peace since. It’s time to get to know yourself. You defined yourself by your family & children, but there’s a whole lot more to learn. What’s happened is …
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/24 03:57 PM
2

Set up a “trail camera” (about $75 all in on AMZN) in your space in case she gets in to do something untoward. Send her a text AND an email alerting her that at all times with all interactions with her going forward you may be recording her and this constitutes “prior notice”. At the same time move all personal valuables, kids birth certificates, family heirlooms, tools, weapons, etc to safe storage.
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/24 07:32 PM
1

This video is perfect form. If you’re fat it’s impossible to be this perfect, but this is the goal. https://youtu.be/ura2mFCdvVs?si=bbayJutpDWYZpmwJ
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 11:02 PM
1

You sound like you can afford a Concept 2 Rower (get a Model D with PM4 or PM5 meter). They can be found on CL but you obviously can afford a new one. Improve your diet only marginally and row that sucker :30 minutes a day (you have to work up) and you won’t need the gym. There is NO single piece of exercise equipment that will do more for you in less time with more muscles than a rower. Period. Make sure you watch a few videos on proper form and try to have a mirror to check yourself. Get onlin…
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 10:51 PM
3

She should be paying for counseling as well. I hope your, um, her legal bills were 6 figures.
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 08:49 PM
5

I can only hope the penalties were significant.
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 08:48 PM
2

Of course she said hurtful things. You no longer matter. You’re a hinderance to her new “perfect life” with “new man”. Accountability is krytonite to women.
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 08:46 PM
1

Tell her you want the child to stay with you during his trip. A deal is a deal.
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 07:24 PM
8

“I got lost. I couldn’t see the signs. Any signs. Not yours, not societal norms, not friends — none of them. I was so consumed with grief, so lost in myself, I almost lost literally everything. In the end, I still lost the most important part of my life. I lost the person who made it all happen. I lost the mother of my children, my rock and my soulmate. There will never be any words that can make up for what I did and what happened. I know that. I know the pain I put you through, the fear. I kno…
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/24 03:39 PM
1

Take your half of the duplex and turn it into a rental. Nothing good can come if this. My ex- lives a mile away and I know she spreads lies in our community. You’ll forever be a target for anything that annoys her, even if you have nothing to do with it.
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/24 10:52 PM
15

Plan A is not what she expected. The limerence is wearing off. So she’s trying to get Plan B back.
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/24 09:37 PM
21

She always thought you were Plan B. New guy likely not all she thought he would be. Fantasy in her head said she could just go back to you, she’d a few tears, be back in a comfortable place, and then find another new man someday. You moved on. Plan B is shattered. She’s stuck. TFB
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 08:09 PM
2

The answer is start wearing a dog tag with names and numbers. You can put a few people on there.now instead of one you can have four. My ex- is not on mine. First is a good friend (die to age and maturity) and then the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/24 10:43 PM
4

I don’t hate my ex-. I just don’t respect her the same way she didn’t respect me or our marriage. So I don’t talk to her.
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/24 11:00 AM
5

I wasn’t so eloquent a few years back when my wife wanted the divorce. I simply told her “Women like you take good men like me, change us, then you’re not happy with the results.”
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/24 09:53 PM
1

There is one other thing you can do and it’s “revenue deferral”. Slow down your billing, slows down your receipts, cuts your “income” for the current year.
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/24 09:46 PM
2

Use a friends place as your “residence” and get your mail delivered there. Arrange for the kids to spent little time there and lots of times with you out being the “fun dad”.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/24 11:41 PM
9

Here’s a simple (maybe) answer. Depends on your business. If it all depends on you, give her 💯% of it in settlement. Then quit and start a competing business.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/24 06:00 PM
6

When my ex- cheated decades ago, the ring came off and never went back on. She rejected you. The ring is a symbol of bonding. There is no bond. Go sell it.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/24 03:31 PM
20

Wait. She could literally game all night long, but not clean a house or do chores? And you feel bad that you’re leaving her after she was cheating on you? Sir, have you seen an orthopod to help you find your spine?
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/24 06:03 AM
15

I’m going to share a “secret” that works in parts of the country. Both the USFS and the BLM have FREE dispersed camping sites on many of their lands. Typically there’s a 14 day stay limit but some are pretty lax. With a van, you could literally park for free in some pretty scenic areas and get a cheap gym membership for showers & exercise. Yeah I know it’s not an actual home, but if you need to rebuild savings, this could be your ticket.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/24 05:57 AM
29

Do not be Captain SavAHoe. Do not let her draw you back in.
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/24 05:53 PM
2

Recently found out my ex- had told people I “walked out on her”. Total fabrication. She called it quits. I just don’t think think true and women go well together.
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/24 02:50 AM
2

She decided to bat for the other team. Not your doing.
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/24 11:21 PM
8

When you file make note that she has removed personal possessions & abandoned the marital residence
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/24 09:10 PM
0

In the world of divorce, it’s takes only one to check out.
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/24 07:52 AM
2

There’s a tequila tasting place in Mismaloya that’s fun. I prefer to stay by the marina as it’s much quieter in that area. Bucerias is nice and most places are a short walk to the beach. The “Romantic Zone” is the big attraction area in PV. Lots of good places to eat, some on the beach. Plenty of shops to wander. You might find your best deal on redweek.com but there are other places. VRBO etc. My suggestion is if you’ve never done anything there do the boat trip out to the island to go snorkeli…
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/24 02:15 AM
7

Life is not social media, sir. Everything you imagine that’s working perfectly out there is just a fantasy.
/r/Divorce_Men10/08/24 10:17 AM
3

You should have a VAR running, in your pocket, 24/7. You should be uploading every day to cloud storage. She’s trying to purposefully make you miserable and potentially blow. If anything, start killing her with kindness. “Good morning wife!”. Or similar. All with a smile.
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/24 06:51 PM
5

School lunches are basically shit quality food. Tell her you don’t want to pay for food that’s bad for your kids health.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 11:17 PM
1

There are all kinds of “drunks”. A friend was married to one who snuck alcohol, then openly drank it and was the classic “wine mom” but was generally happy while drunk even if falling down stupid. She finally cleaned up after years of attempts. Then she wanted a divorce. Another was common law married to a “happy lush” and after years of trying to get her to clean up, she finally did. Became an AA evangelist. Was going to meetings like 6 days a week. Also took up smoking in her 50’s to replace t…
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/24 07:00 PM
1

Time to check out.
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/24 08:51 PM
21

19 years. That’s like a prison sentence. In a country that eliminated slavery & indentured servitude, divorced men are still slaves.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/24 03:45 AM
2

You could go to the ER with back pain & request the lawyer ask for a continuance.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/24 12:19 AM
2

Expect this to go hard. But if she says “Well Janet.. blah blah blah” just look at here and say “Yeah, she’s a miserable person but if that’s what you aspire to I can’t stop you. Just remember, every dollar you waste on what Janet tells you, or a lawyer promised you, costs them nothing but costs you half a buck.”
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/24 11:54 PM
8

The worst thing you’ll encounter is her friends telling her she deserves it all and “you go girl”. Do a spreadsheet of all assets. Do an estimated division. If she gets a bit more after arguing about it it’s really a win for you