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dogbeaches Archive

View 9 posts and 86 comments by dogbeaches on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

I think this one is huge! And something many of us are working on!
/r/RedPillWomen03/06/20 11:43 PM
4

I actually just dealt with this yesterday! My MIL was saying how my husband has always been Indecisive, in a joking tone about food. I felt a natural urge to chime in and add my 2 cents. But why? Doesn’t benefit anyone. So I just smiled. It wasn’t natural at first- but hopefully with practice that’s the norm!
/r/RedPillWives03/06/20 11:53 AM
4

Hello, first of all I love your honest post. It takes real honesty to change our behaviors. I have dealt with similar behavior, especially in a situation where everyone has that joking and sarcastic tone and it feels natural to chime in. In addition, I was also guilty of doing this in front of his parents if his mom was jokingly saying something about my husband - a big NO. As someone above said - sometimes it’s important to just physically walk away. If possible. Use the restroom for a moment a…
/r/RedPillWives03/06/20 11:36 AM
30

I second this and am working on it myself. Without off - ON means nothing. How well said! We don’t appreciate the ON times, the talks the interactions the stories etc if it’s constant. Its akin to asking someone “what’s new” during an ongoing 12 hour conversation. Taking that time that was mentioned like walks and talks with friends is great. It keeps your mind and body healthy. Natural alone time to recharge js a must for all!
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/20 12:49 PM
4

I am in the same EXACT situation in regards to it feeling tense watching his reactions and not reacting. If also makes me sad to see his reactions that I Have created. As in, he was never such a snarky sort of snappy come back type before I became the way I was to lead to it. I know the answer is bite your tongue and continue your good “behavior” of kindness and not reacting. It is so hard though!
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/20 01:11 AM
6

Do you mind elaborating more. Love your response.
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/20 08:44 PM
2

It’s our net! Love that
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/20 06:51 PM
8

Very true. This is the essence of it all!
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/20 03:14 PM
5

Sure is! I’ve just started and already feel this. I know I’ll need to come back to it often. Or at least get reminders from wonderful women like you!
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/20 02:53 PM
14

I was never raised with these tenets so it was profound to me. The concept of being surrendered yet more powerful. It seemed counterintuitive before I picked up the novel. But after reading (esp the first half) it makes a lot of sense. It is hard to explain unless you read it - and does depend on what you are looking to improve in your marriage. But for me it was 😍
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/20 02:31 PM
3

I too refuse! I thought nagging was just "normal language." How terrible! Give that I too come from a long line of naggers! Discovering this feels like a hidden gem. Yet, at first felt counterintuitive. I am practicing every day!
/r/RedPillWives22/04/20 06:45 PM
3

Thanks for sharing this! I also like your quote, the classic let go and you’ll fly situation. How true, and how simple seeming, but so difficult for us! Do less and he will do more!
/r/RedPillWives22/04/20 03:33 PM
2

This is beautiful 😍
/r/RedPillWomen19/04/20 03:24 PM
2

I like your point about matching the tone he is setting. That is so true. And it helps maintain the vibe/energy in those moments.
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/20 12:00 PM
3

Balance is key! Yes!
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/20 11:57 AM
2

Absolutely agree! 👏🏼
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/20 11:57 AM
2

I love how you said your results are looking you in the face every day. Those are the best results of all, there is nothing more important than giving love to your child! 😌♥️
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/20 06:57 PM
1

Interesting how this Covid thing is allowing a lot of us to go back to question what we intrinsically wanted to be in many ways. I am in between jobs right now, and this time off is making me truly reevaluate what I want from my career going forward and more importantly, my marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/20 06:56 PM
2

Also you made a good point about staying fit in pregnancy. I don’t have kids yet, and maybe in the near future, but I made it a goal for myself especially since I’m petite to make sure I am in great shape before going that route, especially abdominal muscles as I have too many petite friends with diastasis recti. It’s nice to see that it has benefited many women. Very motivating
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/20 04:53 PM
2

Thanks for this! Love your user name by the way I also I’m a big yoga person. I like that you are balancing your career, and also utilizing the skills that you learned from it into your family life. I like that you have this balance. How many kids? Sounds like a wonderful family 😌, and it sounds like you are both feeling fulfilled and feeling balanced. I am happy to see that, and I like to surround myself with women/friends in real life who feel similarly balanced and fulfilled as it makes a hea…
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/20 04:04 PM
–

Nice! Is it good for eggs? I don’t know much about them
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/20 12:49 PM
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I love this, I too have been cooking more. In fact I whipped out an apron that I had laying around and it made me feel that much better! It doesn’t matter if I am cooking eggs or a world-class meal it makes me feel like an awesome bad ass chef!
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/20 01:29 AM
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Trust and observe before making assumptions. I like that!
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/20 08:00 PM
2

I second a lot of this, I do know that there is a lot of drama and gossip in your field. Unfortunately, sometimes when we are doing our job with dedication and being very professional, others can take that as being superior and above. In reality it’s always the insecurity of these other woman that is projecting. We know this as adults but we can still become hurt by it. The best thing that you can do is not to stoop down to their level, as you will quickly feel very poorly about your own self an…
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/20 05:10 PM
–

Hello all, as some of you know I am new here. My monthly goal, or let’s just say until the end of Quarantine is going to be to really adopt a lot of the qualities that I am learning on here. Thank you so much to all the ladies who have been very supportive! Of course a goal like this doesn’t have an exact timeline, but I do hope that over the next few weeks I’m able to really: -Add some graciousness to my life, -learn how to take a backseat and be more surrendered And more! Wish me luck 🥰
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/20 03:57 PM
2

Thanks for posting and glad to speak to a dell Indian lady! The same thing happened with my parents! My father hardly has many masculine qualities to begin with (aside from anger which was “deemed” masculine) and as time went on my mother managed to chip away at anything else remaining. My husband has masculine qualities and is inherently a calm and strong leader. Issue is I was/am starting to subconsciously take after my mother when it comes to conflict and coping. That’s why I am here on this …
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/20 11:36 AM
6

Agree!
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/20 12:16 AM
1

Great! Happy to chat!
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/20 12:10 AM
1

Pretty cool! Will check it out
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/20 12:09 AM
2

Sounds wonderful!
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 09:42 PM
2

:)
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 09:37 PM
1

Thank you for this great advice
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 09:36 PM
4

Wow thanks for posting! I literally JUST started the book but would love to share things I find interesting (like an e book club so to speak lol). I’m glad to see your progress already - and feel quite motivated myself! “Whatever you think” sounds like a win win for all! Let’s keep it up friend!
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 09:35 PM
7

Feeling safe enough to be vulnerable. Wow you hit the nail on my head. Yes my head! Because this is exactly something that pertains to what I am going through right now. I too have tons of childhood trauma, a lot of which I have only realized recently, in my 30s. It doesn’t matter whether a lot of those people are in my life anymore or not, the damage has been done, I was given very toxic models on how to look at the world as well as other people. In fact I was taught to treat people who don’t h…
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 08:48 PM
5

Thanks for this. I am working on transferring my power to build and not destroy. If I put half the work into actually sitting back, taking things in, and thinking before speaking - I could move mountains (or not and just find peace lol). The part about humility really resonates with me. I have been quick to have knee jerk snap backs. Without even listening or seeing if there is truth. I will work on this. Thank you
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 08:15 PM
3

Thanks, any tips of your favorites?
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 07:54 PM
1

Love this! Will check it out!
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 07:43 PM
1

Dermaplane is great! And feels therapeutic! Do you do yours at home?
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 07:36 PM
3

Same! I love highlights in my brunette hair but allowing it to gracefully grow out. Having healthy natural skin and hair is beautiful enough - and that’s where the efforts should be focused
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 07:35 PM
1

Yes we can! I am also getting so much more motivation just reading all of this on the Sub. Quarantine is an excellent time to really “look” at what the patterns have become with you and your SO - and even your own self. Like how do we feel when we first wake up. What are our triggers throughout the day? Who and what makes us feel better. Or worse? I have been trying to take mental note of all of this. But of course it all feels frenzied at times!
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 07:32 PM
1

Hello again. I thought about what you said a lot last night. I wanted it to all sink in before replying. First of all love your user name. Second, glad for the comments you’ve posted here. Very helpful for a newbie like me. I took great pride in offering advice. To anyone and everyone. In fact it was a strength of mine. To be the go to person for all of my friends. What did this lead to: Me becoming emotionally exhausted and resentful Me utilizing this same strategy for my husband. My husband an…
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 07:31 PM
3

I am brand new as well! Welcome to both of us! :)
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 07:16 PM
1

Second all this for skincare!!
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 07:15 PM
2

Thanks for your response. In fact with everything going on, you wrote "what else do I have to do right now?" Well that is exactly why I am learning at this moment and really trying to adopt this new way of thinking It will help me tremendously when I am able to implement it.. I too had a mother who did exactly the same. You would THINK that would give me an idea of exactly what NOT to do - and subsequently allow me to grow up knowing a good idea of right and wrong. nope! false. In fact subconsci…
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 06:52 PM
6

Really, really good social skills. Emotional intelligence. Translates as knowing when to STFU. That’s an art. Absolutely!!! THIS IS EVERYTHING. It is such an art, an important, beautiful and precise art. Being very open, edgy and always having something to say gave me the (false) impression that I was strong and forward and that this was a good thing. Sure it is at happy hour with your girlfriends. But not with an SO, and especially not with a husband that you want to respect. Society has shown …
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 06:46 PM
1

Thanks for this!!! Central Park with cherry blossoms is one of my favorite places in the whole world! CONGRATULATIONS
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 06:19 PM
2

Interesting point about women saying theyre happy and then sprinkling in some truth. I think as young women in your 20s you take the majority of what friends and other "role models" say and take that as "what to do." But it is so true - now that I am married myself, and see the reality of the work it takes to keep a relationship - I notice that it hardly matters what people say! What matters is, are you happy? No - then do opposite! Your term of doing the opposite is super super helpful to me, t…
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 04:58 PM
2

Thank you for this, I had never heard of this philosophy and reading about this makes a lot of sense to me. It’s going to help me understand this new way of thinking for me
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 04:35 PM
1

Great point. I notice from the beginning of my marriage a few years ago until now I have really learned to understand that my husbands cues aren’t just filler words. he truly means them. It’s taken me a long time to understand this Because it was very easy for me to brush him and his words off given that he is such a kind and flexible person. Daily work
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 12:54 AM
1

Love the term morbid fascination. I am just trying to awaken traverse and realize that it was right in front of my eyes perhaps in many ways but I was also blind to it. I am excited to start my journey but also feel quite overwhelmed by it. I have many close friends that also come from a Hispanic background and were taught similar. It’s interesting how even amongst them some of them are are much more on the RedPill sort of side versus others. It’s all a growing spectrum and because women in our …
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 12:52 AM
1

I’m so impressed by this. How you were compelled to do something opposite. And what you stated - yes It truly is default on a large scale. I am in the process of “awakening to that” and finding answers. Wish me luck!
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 12:46 AM
1

what a great and to the point answer. What types of things did you notice in the women around you? Wondering what you observed
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 12:08 AM
2

Thanks so much I appreciate that. Would love to chat more soon!
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/20 12:55 PM
2

Thanks so much for your feedback! I'll check out YouTube as a source! I am much more of a reader but it can’t hurt to check out some good peoples channels while I am learning about all of this! Let me know if you have any additional current channels or videos you enjoy in this regards these days!
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/20 12:06 PM
2

thanks for this. This is something I am actively working on. It looks like you have done some work in your life to make this possible. What are certain things that help you achieve this? If you don't mind sharing. You are right about decreasing masculinity when offering solutions. We need to be a good sounding board and offer support, not constantly be a fixer-upper. In fact often when we are offering our own solutions, it’s a way to decrease our OWN anxiety. It’s a way to talk to our OWN selves…
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/20 11:57 AM
1

I was thinking the same! Although where we are staying at now is my in laws! We are about to move post pandemic!!!
/r/RedPillWives13/04/20 08:51 AM
2

Perfect. It’s a good idea to have a designated space. It motivates you to “visit” their more often (yes even when quarantined at home!). Don’t forget music!!
/r/RedPillWives13/04/20 08:35 AM
1

Love your use name! 2 of my fave things :)
/r/RedPillWives13/04/20 08:05 AM
3

Thanks for your comments! I’ve adopted the headphones recently too. They make it easier for me to be less moody from bad sleep lol. It also allows me to zone out. Great point. I know what you mean about the second part. And wasting the whole day. Especially nowadays when days roll into one another. I had a few instances of that back in March when we were first all nome together. It felt suffocating to imagine that days together would be that way. I quickly learned I had to 1) STFU about so many …
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/20 07:08 AM
2

I am similar! I Alwaysss have my nails (home manicure) painted as well. After years of picking at my nails as a kid - I now love looking down at perfectly neat, clean, and lacquered nails on my hands! :)
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/20 07:05 AM
7

Absolutely agree about signature scent! It makes you feel like “yourself” even doing trying times. And is comforting for those (husband) around you!
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/20 07:03 AM
1

Yup!
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/20 07:02 AM
3

My comment may be a little different so sorry in advance if it’s not what people are looking for! (New to the sub!) Honestly when we were first in quarantine I thought it was a splendid time to catch up with family and friends. It is a time where each day rolls into another, and you can catch up like old times when there was much more time on our hands (when we were all younger). I quickly realized this would not do me any good. And instead cultivating some good solo hobbies, and that with my hu…
/r/RedPillWives13/04/20 07:00 AM
3

Absolutely. It takes a conscious person to do this as well! Thinking first and knowing they emotional state!
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/20 06:47 AM
6

Same here - same here. I am sure many of us have to work on controlling our emotions, it is a process. Your example above sounds exactly like me during our last move. I look back at it now and realize not only that I was being emotional, but that it didn’t feel right. It didn’t feel like ME. I notice that when I act out of rage or emotions I am not ME. Yet if we continue to act that way - how can we not just adopt that as our new norm. To feel like my most innate self, I am practicing not reacti…
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/20 12:58 AM
2

I too would love to know more about what this professor shared with you. If you are comfortable with sharing. Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/20 12:56 AM
3

Thanks for your input! Although I am not from a Christian background - it all vibes perfectly with me. And that’s the point, women and men. The more I learn the more I realize that innately women DO want to serve. And no not in that doormat “I have no personality or life outside of you and I’m dumb as a doorknob” sort of way. That is just media’s way of making it seem like it’s one or the other (super smart and assertive vs dumb and subservient). A mature and strong woman knows there’s a complex…
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/20 12:54 AM
5

Thanks for your reply! Do you mind expanding on number 3? Would love to hear your take
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/20 12:15 AM
6

Thanks for that. Funny how in my 30s (thinking I knew myself So well) I am only now truly learning what my deep down self interests are. A very deep journey!
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 10:56 PM
4

Thanks for your reply. I am just starting to learn about it and it has been serving me well already. So much of it that even seems like “common sense” to others perhaps, but I wasn’t raised in an environment where I saw a lot of this behavior promoted. The anti-men movement only harms women after all!
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 10:55 PM
2

Thanks for explaining. I hope I wasn’t offensive at all by bringing up the career. I like your comments about the career and marriage. I realize now it isn’t about doing it “all well” it’s about truly knowing your role and how you want your marriage to be. Funny how after all these years I am learning this now!!!
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 09:26 PM
2

Thanks for this advice on “capitalizing on your husbands manly qualities”
/r/RedPillWives12/04/20 09:16 PM
2

Next on my list! I feel overwhelmed by the task but will use “stay at home” time to do it!
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 08:58 PM
2

Thanks for pointing out that it is going against the grain( if you don’t mind what do you personally mean by this) To me- its relevant Especially in today's society that tends to emasculate men often (I think). I agree it is not more of a stretch (it seems) to do for some women vs others - because it all comes from within. Whether the career is to be home full time or not does not immediately affect the dynamic. My mother was a SAHM and was as far from red pill as possible. On the flip side I kn…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 08:45 PM
8

I think you mentioned how TRP was not a women friendly space elsewhere. Thanks for the “warning” ! I like what you said about even liberal women taking this path. I am in my 30s, married and in a “high power” career. I bring up the career not to uplift myself but to bring up the fact that I would have scoffed at the idea of something like this years ago when I knew NOTHING about it. But now I see how much wisdom, truth, and reality there is in the role of man vs woman. No matter what the faith, …
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 08:13 PM
2

I am a shopping FANATIC!!! I’ve over time invested in pieces that are more expensive than what I used to buy - but last. I am in my 30s so building a valuable wardrobe is key. The key is to pick and choose items you like from different stores. Knowing with time your own self and what wears best. For example: button downs J crew. Jeans not j crew (for me and my body type). Petite sizes Madewell for boho chic. Jeans Madewell for SOME styles only. Etc. a lot of trial and error - but when you have t…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 08:09 PM
2

I am new to this all and starting The Surrendered Wife tomorrow!
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 08:06 PM
2

Thanks for your list!
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 08:06 PM
5

Agree! And easy to keep clean! (Washing the cover very often instead of whole comforter)
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 08:03 PM
8

Thanks for your reply. I notice how at first I too thought of some religious teachings (I am not Christian but read plenty from all religions) seemed "sexist." Yet, the more I understand the concept of the balance between a man and woman I see that - if and when a woman does have "authority" over a man - a true male/female relationship would suffer. Modern day marriage would suffer. Modern day marriage DOES suffer for many because of this. Interesting to see things in a new light. Thanks
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 07:59 PM
10

Thanks for pointing out stuff that HE likes. It is so easy to do what is innate, and your own love language - but (being new here) I am working on reminding myself to speak in a language other than my "own" when trying to show love
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 07:37 PM
2

Wow this really really moved me. So many questions I have! Would you be open to elaborating/talking further? I am new to all of this and feel that perhaps you could help. (Sorry is that is too much!)
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 10:38 AM
3

Thank you for your list! I really appreciate it. Especially the aspect of priorities over others and united front
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 12:35 AM
4

Thanks for posting this. I love the idea of saying “let me check with X” and get back to you. Or even simply saying - “I’ll let you know” and feel great when I do it. So often though we feel caught up in the moment and feel we have to answer immediately. Realizing that we don’t and we are allowed to take our time when speaking to others seems so basic, yet important!
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/20 10:03 PM
3

Hello, I am not Christian but have read that verse many times and things it has incredible meaning. In fact, I have even discussed with friends what their personal belief in that regard is. Each culture gives an interpretation of what marriage means - but it really goes down to each couple themselves. If you don’t mind, do you mind elaborating more about the verse? I especially think of it as the concept of priorities. Now no longer say father/mother/other family as much as your own spouse.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/20 10:00 PM
8

Wow that is strong. Did you feel at that exact moment you had your “ah ha” moment? I’m new to this sub and still working on getting that “ah ha” moment myself
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/20 09:57 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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