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drchex77 Archive

View 1 post and 16 comments by drchex77 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
23

drchex77/r/Divorce_Men18/01/26 02:10 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
3

I feel this every day. I describe it as feeing untethered from everything. I was grounded and knew my place in the world. And I was adding value to society and to my kids life. I'm 4 months into this and while the constant feeling of sadness has dissipated, when I feel the sadness it still hurts as deep. I'm not sure that will ever change
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/26 03:49 AM
3

Same! She describes it as amicable but she has been super cold
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/26 12:52 AM
2

Can you give some examples of standard things that should be documented? My wife and I are going through what is so far an amicable but still emotionally taxing divorce. I seem to trust her and vice versa. I have come across anything that I need to document aside from what my lawyer and hers are putting together. As for the other tips - I'm struggling with how much to swallow my pride in interim support $ which are quite high. Interim will be 4 months of nesting. Not sure how much to push back o…
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/26 01:03 AM
1

30 year fixed jumbo loan
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/26 12:36 AM
1

I'm starting a similar situation in NY. Bought our house in Aug 2020 as well and have a 2.625 rate. Selling would likely mean I have to downsize (due to market appreciation) and still pay the same amount (due to higher rates). I'm hoping that we can agree to a deferred equity split where we agree to sell the house after the kids graduate high school (12 years). I will get a credit for future equity payments off of the 50/50 split. Thankfully my wife wants to keep the kids in their school distric…
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/26 12:22 AM
1

Yes I've started a list of things that didn't work in our relationship and that has helped. I don't think she's cheating. She has explicitly denied it several times as has her lawyer to mine. And she's admitted difficult hiding of bad financial behavior. So I believe her here...for now. Sorry to hear your stbexw cheated. That must be exceptionally hard to process. How long has it taken you to process your situation? Some days I am ready to move on, others I'm infuriated with the one-sidedness an…
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/26 03:06 AM
1

Thanks. I am trying to accept some of this and my mindset is shifting to look forward vs back at times. But it's really hard. The fact that she is so over it is definitely hard to cope with.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 03:34 AM
2

Yes I know this is correct. And if I'm really being honest I'm holding onto the idea of a happy home and family more than I am the reality. It's just that the fear of the unknown, being alone, and having a much harder life is daunting. I was single until I was 36 (dated a lot in my 30s but didn't find that connection). It was a horrible feeling. I don't want to go back to that as I'm approaching 50.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/26 04:25 PM
2

She has no interest in marriage counseling. I offered that immediately. I've asked her twice if she was seeing someone. She said no. When her credit card debt was revealed, her own lawyer asked her if she had a boyfriend and she said no. Her lawyer shared that with my lawyer. I believe her - she never leaves the house. So it would have to be a mid day affair. She's not that sexual a person so I don't think that's happening. And when I confronted her on the credit card debt I asked if there was a…
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/26 02:32 PM
3

Ouch that is rough. And I hear you that it is going to take time. I can't imagine feeling like this for another year though. It's a horrible feeling. And life is about to get harder, not easier. Co-parenting and splitting time is an extra life burden.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/26 02:23 PM
2

This is a very similar situation to mine. I was putting in hard work to be the sole provider for the family. I thought we were aligned in that we were just toughing it out through a challenging period. She wasn't great at communicating but did try. I was worse at receiving it. But it was never clear how bad her feelings were. She checked out and out of resentment, I checked out. While I'm starting to realize she didn't provide me any affection even when things were good and I was bad at expressi…
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/26 01:18 PM
2

Yeah I'm trying that. We are working on a nesting strategy. And then have to split our assets. I just feel so alone. I can't find the motivation to be my best self at this point. I'm just in a fog of sadness. It's like I am not even the same person anymore. I just walk around in pain. No interest in anything else. We haven't even gotten to the hard parts yet like telling our kids or actually moving out. My friends have been amazingly supportive but it still hurts so much and feels completely avo…
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/26 04:37 AM
10

I'm trying. I've gone from thinking it was 100% my fault to realizing it's 50 / 50. I'm wondering if she ever loved me through 10 years of marriage. It's brutal to feel this way
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/26 02:32 AM
2

I'm about to enter these conversations. What is the 2-2-5-5 schedule?
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 07:32 PM
5

I'm struggling with this right now too. She has fallen out of love with me due to my emotional avoidance and taking her for granted. I'm making all of the necessary improvements in myself including therapy. But she's not warming up. 1 month of improvement can't make up for years of selfishness on my part. But the outcome will be worse for everyone if we go through with it and tell the kids. Worst thing is she is stay at home and I work full time, so I don't see how I'll be able to spend much tim…
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/26 05:21 PM
3

What do you mean "know your survival number"?
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/25 09:41 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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