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emberlands Archive

View 6 posts and 32 comments by emberlands on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Pick based on the individual not the firm. Big law firms may have more resources, but they will cost you to access them. A small firm may be overwhelmed with business. Either way, interview your attorney as you would any employee, and pick based on your guy feel of their competence. Have questions prepared, some of which you know the answer you should be hearing.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/22 12:37 AM
6

Freedom is never cheap, but always worth the price.
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/21 08:03 PM
1

Dude, none of this is right, and it's all very familiar. My ex was the same, an absolute nightmare. Never worked, yet would call me lazy, even though I worked all hours of the day. We went to countless marriage counsellors, but she didn't like them because she would say they are always taking my side (in hind sight it was because she was clearly in the wrong). She would shout at me for stupid things like leaving the cap of the toothpaste (I kid you not, this even came up in counselling). It soun…
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/21 12:35 PM
3

I could have written this post! You cant believe how good life can be when you don't have someone dragging you down. Regarding women, aim lower, Ive found women in the late 20s and early 30s to be great, as they don't have all the baggage of old women, and they are looking for a man with a bit of maturity.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/21 08:33 AM
15

I spent 11 years holding my marriage together with nothing by compromises and sheer will. The one thing I learnt is that a single person cannot save a marriage, she has to want it as well.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/21 11:13 PM
35

Brother, its over. You cannot win someone back who doesn't want to be won back. And do you really want to be with someone that expects you to change or will divorce you? Conditional love is the worst. Use this time to prepare. You're on the first step of the divorce process. I call it The End of Forever. Things you thought would be forever are ending, and there will be a lot of pain and grief ahead. Everyone of us has stood where you stand, and thought we could turn the tide. But we couldn't, an…
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/21 10:14 PM
6

No hearing problems or anything, she was just looking for something to start a fight about. They had been sick the week before and she had kept them off school as well.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/21 07:00 PM
2

Hahaha, no, same thing happened to me. My originally offer was a lot higher, and had a monthly component. What she ended up was zero monthly, and a lot less lump sum. She's still angry about that, but I warned her, if you fight me, I will fight back.
/r/Divorce_Men30/09/21 07:55 PM
1

The thing is, I have developed my rules very carefully, and they are flexible. Some days there is no game time, some days more. The main reason being is that he plays with and chats with a group of boys in his class, so its more a social thing. However, she continues to promote this idea that I have no rules, even though I have bent over backwards to share them with her, she has never appreciated them. An example being that the kids weren't eating well at her house, so I shared with her what mea…
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/21 09:35 PM
3

100% agree. Ive muted her notifications. I imagine there will be more abusive messages trying to get a response.
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/21 10:00 PM
4

I asked him why she was shouting. He wrote a long story about being told he had a certain amount of time on the console and then he went over the time because he thought she would tell him when the time was up. I told him that he is responsible for knowing when the time was up. He then told me she had been talking about me. I asked what she said. He said : That when I am there I get E V E R Y T H I N G I want I replied: Well we both know that to not be true, and its unfortunate that she feels th…
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/21 09:53 PM
11

I agree. I was tempted to just reply "Find rules that work at your house" But Im ignoring her.
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/21 08:49 PM
3

Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/21 08:48 PM
4

Have messaged you.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/21 10:23 PM
9

Assuming you're in England. ​ Get a solicitor, and don't agree or sign anything until you have. Hire the best you can afford, most do a free initial meeting, find one that gets you and is also willing to go to war for you, not one who just wants to fill in the forms. Don't leave the house until a solicitor has advised you're good to do so. If she has possession of the house, its harder to sell it if she goes back on her agreement. Nothing gets signed over until a judge has reviewed your consent …
/r/Divorce_Men09/08/21 01:37 PM
7

Yes, she often does this. She will make a statement, she will never say: "Can we discuss changing the schedule so I can take the kids away.." Instead she just makes a statement.
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/21 04:26 PM
2

I know, and usually I try, but this time I had enough of her bs.
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/21 09:34 AM
1

Great advice, thank you. I think you and others are right, I need to rise above it, leave her to fight yesterday’s wars while I secure the kids and myself a future
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/21 12:58 AM
1

Yeah I know, usually I just ignore her, but this time I was not feeling like walking away from the fight. But yeah, thats a good idea, I need to look at the bigger picture and stop fighting these little squabbles and giving her the attention she craves.
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/21 11:15 PM
1

Great advice, thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/21 10:51 PM
2

Thanks, Ive ordered that book.
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/21 10:02 PM
1

Thanks, but then. I just get a whole stream of messages saying I broke a promise etc, and couldn't even keep my word
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/21 08:12 PM
2

I know, but I was always told that you have to stand up to a bully. Its hard to just ignore it, but I need to get better at doing that.
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/21 05:43 PM
1

Sounds so similar! Its like they get an instruction manual. I think its hard because if I dont fight back it feels like Im letting her get away with it.
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/21 05:42 PM
1

Problem is that because of the kids we have to exchange information. But she just uses it as an excuse to fight over something. Its like unless I just surrender each time she wants a fight. I mean in this case she couldnt even accept me saying "let me think about it"
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/21 05:08 PM
2

I know, I tried to end it early on, but I had just had enough of her pushing me around.
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/21 04:59 PM
1

Usually realtor fees would be factored in.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/21 08:57 PM
1

Kids, no. Marriage yes.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/21 08:57 PM
2

Women dont need support, they already have the courts and judges in their favor.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/21 10:37 PM
10

Hey mate, all of us have been where you are. Its the start of a long, and difficult journey, but you can and will make it. I remember those sleepless nights, the waking up terrified of all the things I had to do, but it passes. The best way to confront a fear is to take action, no matter how small, start making a list of the things you need to do. One thing that helped me was I felt the same, that the family was ending, and someone reframed it for me, the family wasn't ending, just that she was …
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/21 11:13 PM
6

Get a solicitor, its the best money you will ever spend. You need someone in your corner. DO NOT PROCEED WITHOUT ONE. You have equal custody rights in the UK, despite what women will claim. Read up and know your rights. Speak to your solicitor and to any friends that have been through a divorce. The court will act in the best interest of the children. So if you can show that you can look after them, that they have family nearby etc, that all goes in your favour. For the record when mine went thr…
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/21 08:24 PM
9

Every man going through a divorce has stood were you are and has felt as you do. One emotion I felt was grief, grief for the life I thought I would lead, the future, growing old together etc. What no one tells you is that grief sometimes feels very much life fear. You're going to feel like you cant do it without her, the truth is, you can. Planning is the most important thing. Write down everything (online, somewhere private), everything from what you'll need for a new house, the chores, the imp…
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/21 11:58 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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