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enternationalist Archive

View 0 posts and 25 comments by enternationalist on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

I can see that perpective - yet, I don't think it's unreasonable to see how people could parse what is generally an unqualified statement as advice. When people are looking for a solution, and they're told something like "You should do X", they're going to try to understand it as actionable. I think, even if the phrase isn't used with the intent of advice, that doesn't mean the speaker isn't responsible for being aware of its possible interpretations, especially in the mental space of someone wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/16 08:25 AM
1

This isn't the case for everyone, but what a lot of people need is just a little self-validation and esteem - if they're not getting that from people being sexually attracted to them (which is a major factor for a lot of men), they're going to have a hard time overcoming their insecurities. Building physical strength is a way to do that that doesn't require you to be confident, or sure of yourself, just yet. You can feel better about yourself, and more secure, in an accessible way -- and not onl…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/16 08:17 AM
2

This subreddit is the kind of place where it's easy to find people fundamentally misunderstanding each other. I generally post to try and understand people's views (if not agree with them) and make those views accessible to others. I do this because it's challenging to think reasonably, patiently, and deliberately open-mindedly about these topics, and I want practice.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/16 08:57 AM
1

That's fascinating. I'm relieved to hear that there's some evidence for the biological source of this . Do you have any other good sources?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/16 02:17 PM
1

I get that that's the idea, but I'm unconvinced that refusing to let your partner sometimes have some more control is a good idea. I know my answer here is leaving a lot to be desired - fundamentally, I'm just questioning if it's really a good idea to be that rigid in approach. I can see why control is desirable, and I think for a lot of people - who maybe don't take enough control normally - that adopting a strategy like taking more control could really improve their relationships. In that way,…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/16 09:21 AM
3

I think it could easily be a combination of both, to be honest. Appearances do affect how people are perceived, and social skills are extremely important, too. Both seem like entirely valid factors, and they're certainly not mutually exclusive. What to do about them and their relative importance is what people disagree on, I suppose.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/16 12:28 AM
1

I don't especially identify as a feminist, nor as a men's rights activist (note that I'm not the person you initially replied to), so I'm honestly just explaining how I see certain viewpoints and movements - that in mind, I am in no way asserting that men's right's people always blame women for things. They're varied as well. I think I would say that feminism captures a broader range of people, mostly by virtue of having existed for so long. Anyway, back to the discussion. Building on what I sai…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/16 12:21 AM
1

I agree that it may feel pointless and toxic - and I think I would argue that for a fuller understanding of gender issues, that that's something you may want to brave. Even if it's toxic and you find it disagreeable, understanding that toxicity is vital to getting at the core of what make people tick. If we don't understand people's needs, how can we get anywhere with understanding each other, and being more egalitarian? I believe many non-feminists would have a similar experience going into som…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/16 12:10 AM
6

Not necessarily. Certainly, some feminists do, but unfortunately "feminism" is an outrageously broad term with wildly varying beliefs. I think many (not all) people would have something closer to blaming "society", be it as it's built by all people, men and women. Of course, it may still give the impression of blaming specific groups more, but there seems to be nuance to many people's views.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/16 12:01 AM
1

Not exactly a CMV, but there's definitely a difference between individuals. I think it's not unreasonable to suggest that men may, on average, have a more overt sex drive - though I lack evidence on the subject. By no means do all men crave sex to the same extent, however, and by no means to do women not crave sex. I know you didn't say anything about women - I thought I'd clarify anyway - and "men need sex" comes with a faint suggestion that women might not, and that's certainly not the case. A…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 11:54 PM
1

I believe you when you say you were legitimately curious. I also would say that asking someone directly what they can bring to the table is something that could be perceived as rude, even if you didn't mean it as such. To explain how it might read as rude --- well, in many cases, dating site profiles explain what people are looking for in a partner. This is convenient, because people can glance at profiles and see if they're going to potentially be a good fit. Asking someone "what they offer to …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 04:36 PM
6

To be entirely fair, I think they're saying generalizations aren't useful in this specific situation, when they are useful in others. Of course, you might still disagree with that - I think it's worth understanding and representing their position as best as possible, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 04:23 PM
1

I know it may seem obvious - that said, this is explicitly a subreddit for debate - I feel like it's likely part of that to occasionally explain things you consider obvious in order for people to understand what you think. Nature of the beast, perhaps.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 04:14 PM
2

And thank you, too. I do think that perhaps even as a general rule, it might be troublesome - but perhaps, if you find yourself consistently over-investing, it might work for you. I don't quite have a clear argument for you about it, yet, though, so I won't say more until I'm sure what I'm saying makes sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 04:11 PM
1

Ah, you're right. You did mention romantic intimacy. I'll admit that, in the context of this thread, I read it only as sexual intimacy. In that case, take what I wrote not as an objection, but as an extension of discussion. I think it's still relevant.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 04:08 PM
1

Oh, of course, I didn't mean to imply that you were. I was just emphasizing that it's possible to err either way (too much, not enough or in the wrong way), and hence that it's likely your personal investment level will need to change based on the needs of the specific relationship and situation, rather than on a rule like always being less invested. Certainly, I wasn't trying to say anything about you, personally.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 03:54 PM
5

I think it's reasonable to argue that "slut" has negative connotations. In this context, it's a bit strange, since "slut-shaming" also contains the word slut, and to me sort of implies a want for "slut" to be used free of negative connotation, so it's a weird situation --- however, in normal conversation, I think it wouldn't be entirely unjustified to say that using the word "slut", while easily digestible, does imply some negative judgment on women with many sex partners. However, it's true tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 03:43 PM
8

It'd be a good idea, I think, to gently indicate which parts of their thoughts you consider antagonistic. They've given an indication that they don't want to be hateful, so I think it'd be worth giving them something to work with to really understand your thoughts rather than leaving them with a label of antagonism to try to understand by themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 03:34 PM
2

I think it's probably a bit much to say that the only way an adult can receive validation is through sex. I agree that for many people, including myself, it's incredibly important, but I think it's also vital to recognize that for others it's substantially less important. Without acknowledging those possibilities, it becomes hard for us to understand each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 03:31 PM
2

I think saying something like "always be the less invested person" is a touch harsh. It's a bit like asking yourself to never finish eating a meal -- relationships are fundamentally constructs of investment and interaction. More valuable is to simply be aware of and considerate of the level of engagement in any relationship. Being overly-invested can be intimidating and pressuring, and being cold and aloof ... well, that just sucks for everyone involved. It's more nuanced than a single statement…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 03:26 PM
1

Yeah. This whole subreddit is an endless battle against sweeping generalizations, though, from every angle.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 03:22 PM
1

I don't think women generally think that, to be honest. People I've met vary wildly on how they evaluate people by appearance. Sure, lots of people will think like that, but saying it's generally true is overstating it, I think.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 03:21 PM
8

What's happening here is partially, perhaps, just a difference in the use of the word "need". I don't think many people view sex as truly a life-or-death need like, say, oxygen. So, let's be understanding that people may mean different things by the word, even if they're not quite correct in using its literal definition. However, that's not the substance of what you're saying, so let's move on. Yes, a desire of sex as a form of social validation is, in part, socially constructed. However, does t…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 03:11 PM
1

I would say that being suppliant and nice is generally the easier option, all around, for most people (of any gender). After all, that's generally a path of least resistance. Like you say, putting yourself back into the equation is difficult when compared to just being easy with everyone - and still, I wouldn't say that asserting yourself is necessarily mutually exclusive with being kind and generous. I don't mean to say that's what you were saying, but take it for the sake of discussion. I thin…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 02:47 PM
4

I think what they were trying to illuminate was not that doing things for your spouse is submission, but rather, depending on context, that it may be. Indeed, I would argue that it's entirely possible to do things for your spouse in a manner that is "dominant".
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/16 02:37 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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