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esired Archive

View 6 posts and 61 comments by esired on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

You talk too much. I can only imagine the ear beating you gave to your wife.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/06/16 01:18 AM
2

First read the books in the sidebar especially NMMNG. If you already have reread it because it hasn't taken hold yet. I want to be in constant touch. I 'miss' her always, not really because when I am with her its not a feeling of elation but just 'normal'. If she misses my phone I get an anxiety attack which turns into a face-off with rudeness and swears being exchanged. Hey before I swallowed the pill I used to be like this too. It will ruin every relationship you have. You don't long for her, …
/r/MarriedRedPill03/03/16 11:56 PM
1

Perfect response. I can be an asshole at times so I will say I'm sorry when needed but you do have to be aware when it's a test. For example my wife was in a pissy mood over a previous disagreement we had and wanted to be left alone all morning. We had plans to go out later that evening and sense she wanted to be left alone earlier I confirmed if she was still planing to tag along. In her mind that was mean and disrespectful and I obviously owed her an apology. I shut it down quick and turned a …
/r/MarriedRedPill04/02/16 05:35 AM
1

I have no idea. I've never had them checked before.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/02/16 04:16 AM
2

This is great and actionable advice. I'll be using this for sure.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/01/16 02:16 AM
1

Yeah that's what I've decided to work on 1st. Getting her to open up more about what she's in to.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/16 11:39 PM
0

Yeah but as a was told, nothing changes.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/16 11:36 PM
1

I for sure overthink everything and maybe that's is what is amplifying this feeling.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/16 11:36 PM
1

I've actually cut down on porn and masturbation a lot and it is still present. I get horny more often but not really for my wife.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/16 11:35 PM
1

Your 1st paragraph sums up how I'm feeling exactly. Things have gotten better for sure but it's still just a little off.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/16 11:32 PM
1

The mindset you want is : "right now, I am the best I can possibly be, and I continue to improve every day in every way" That is an awesome way to look at things. Thanks for the advice.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/16 02:01 PM
2

I read that post the first time it was posted but I'm going to give it another read today. Thanks for the info.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/16 03:06 AM
1

She is into light domination but besides that she is fairly vanilla. She doesn't really have any fantasies. Last time I asked it was just having sex all day with someone she likes a lot. And we have done that multiple times.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/16 02:52 AM
1

I think I have this part down. We have sex at crazy times in crazy places but I feel we, maybe I , have plateaued a bit. I know I still have room for improvement until I am exactly where I want to be and that will take time. But during this transitionary phase I've lost interest.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/16 02:49 AM
1

Yes on all the personal questions but I do have a few more pounds to shed from a recent injury/holiday feasting. Also I was comparing it to other women I've been with. She is fairly vanilla. I've been getting her to open up more but it's moving along so slowly I'm starting to lose interest.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/16 02:42 AM
5

As the old saying goes fool me once shame on you, full me twice shame on me. A third time shouldn't happen. She has showed her true self. You can try to pretend that this women who lied to you repeatedly is now honest about not fucking this guy behind your back. Or you can make yourself a bit more scarce and use that time to find your "true love." I know no one wants to blow up their marriage but you shouldn't have to make excuses for an unfaithful wife.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/01/16 01:51 AM
1

Nailed it. Also I would recommend listening to the beige Philip podcast. Dante Nero has a lot of quality advice.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/12/15 10:56 PM
5

Whatever you do don't try to hold onto her or the marriage. Seems counter intuitive but it will only make you look weak in her eyes and reconfirm her decision to leave. Focus on you and your kids. She said she wants a divorce. Why wait? Treat her like the papers are already signed and stop doing anything for her that you normally did as her husband. Give her a nice preview of how "green" the other side is.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/12/15 11:58 PM
3

I don't think this subreddit could handle two whinemore's
/r/MarriedRedPill02/12/15 11:53 PM
2

I had the same problem. I was too concerned about finding things to fix I would often forget to show appreciation for the things that were going well.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/11/15 01:30 AM
2

I agree with you. My motivation has been sapped recently and it has coincided with an increase in my porn viewing. I know correlation doesn't always mean causation but it's for sure had an impact. Thanks for the great post. Time to get back on track.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/10/15 01:41 PM
1

Good FR. I'm working on apologizing less. She gets really persistent and I get annoyed and one times cave. I know it's not good to do so. What helped you make the transition to apologizing less
/r/MarriedRedPill15/09/15 11:40 PM
1

Thanks. It still baffles me how parents can be so selfish.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/09/15 11:40 PM
1

I'll give it shot. She was in good spirits today. So would you recommend bringing it up when she is having a bad day. Or attempting to go while she is in a better mood. My opinion is the latter but I would like to hear your recommendation sice you have been through something similar.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/09/15 04:32 PM
1

That is true. People act like they are afraid of sunlight here.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/09/15 04:30 PM
1

Your in good shape. Thats fine but you should be aiming for your best shape. This is something I am working on as well. Good/ok isn't good enough If you want her to be a top class freak in the bed room you have to be a top class dude outside of it. Also It isn"t just physical. You can be a 10/10 but if you are constantly supplicating to your wife and failing shit test she won't be aroused by you.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/09/15 04:27 PM
1

I posted a similar question recently. I got some great responses and hopefully what I learned can help you as well. I was ready to walk away from sex but chose to have sex. If your not enjoying yourself why are you continuing? This is something I have slacked on since my wife has been pregnant, which was a mistake by the way. But when were dating we were fooling around and I really wanted a bj. S I moved into position and she started complaining and rationalising why she wouldn't do it. So I jus…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/09/15 04:22 PM
1

I have noticed subtle racism here. A lot of people initially see me as terrifying, because in their eyes I'm a big black guy. Even though I'm not huge. I didn't think I would encounter something this serious though. Kind of threw me for a loop.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/09/15 04:05 PM
1

I think when we go back to America this is an awesome idea. But I have heard, there is a big stigma about seeing mental health professionals in this country. I will bring it up and she how she responds.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/09/15 04:03 PM
1

Yeah I've been here a while and it did effect my chances a bit when I was single but I didn't think it was this ingrained. Hopefully her mom is an outlier and other people don't have to put up with the same bs.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/09/15 04:01 PM
2

My thoughts exactly but she is having a hard time seeing it because even if she is a huge asshole she is still her mother.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/09/15 03:59 PM
2

BTW I'd bet her mother will come around. This is a woman-to-woman shit test/power play. Mommy is no longer the center of your girl's world and, AWALT, she's losing a validation/dependency and is upset about it. That you are black is a convenient excuse for her to be a bitch about taking her daughter away. I didn't consider the angle of an overt power play from the mom but it makes sense. Maybe she is trying to get me or my wife to break so we can change our minds about going to the U.S. Either w…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/09/15 04:05 AM
1

Also, don't let your wife hold this over you at any point in the future. You only asked her to marry you - she agreed. If she wants to go back to the womb, no one is blocking her from walking out the door. I for sure won't try to appease her mom. I think the most frustrating part for me is I am used to being able to solve problems when they arise. I know for this situation the best thing for me to do is run support and let her and her and her mom figure it out
/r/MarriedRedPill14/09/15 04:01 AM
1

How much is that when the "usual" is already always? I explained that poorly. How long should I expect more intense comfort test would have been a better way to phrase it. Is it safe to assume these test will be a bit more intense. Also, don't let your wife hold this over you at any point in the future. You only asked her to marry you - she agreed. If she wants to go back to the womb, no one is blocking her from walking out the door. This is something I noticed she tries to pull when we she is u…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/09/15 02:19 AM
1

thanks. I think I took the STFU a little too far and skipped talking about the important things.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/09/15 10:17 PM
1

It is a field report so a bit of both. I learned a lot from reading FR's people have posted in the past so I wrote down my experience in case it can help someone out in a similar situation. Also I am looking for input/advice because maybe there is a point I missed. Or I lesson I think I learned that can be refined or corrected.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/09/15 02:15 PM
1

Yeah that is a bridge I pray we don't have to cross. Also congratulations.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/09/15 02:11 PM
1

Perfect response. I will use this in the future for sure. Thanks.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/09/15 02:11 PM
1

This is my biggest weakness in my MAP. I'm so bad at just walking away and allow myself to get caught up in hour long arguments.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/09/15 11:19 PM
0

I agree with you completely. it's making for a requirement of extra comfort on my part... some of which is being met with hostility. Now she is trying to milk the situation for all that it is worth. She can sense you feel bad and is using it as a weapon. I don't do nice things for people with shitty attitudes, and you shouldn't either. If I am not mistaken, it is ok to give comfort to a wife who needs it but giving it to her while she is behaving poorly only reinforces bad behaviour.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/15 10:55 PM
1

From someone who worked in a restaurant for a long time, thank you. You would be amazed at the stuff people let their kids get away with.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/15 10:44 PM
1

I don't have kids yet but this comes up sometime when me and my wife are doing things around the house. I told she can either accept that I do things differently than she does or if she wants done a particular way she has the responsibility to do it. At first there was a little resistance but now she knows it is pointless.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/15 10:40 PM
1

It's gone
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/15 10:32 PM
1

This is what I wanted to point out in my OP. How if our ego can't handle unfounded criticism we will be dead in the water against any harsh criticism with truth in it.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/15 10:32 PM
1

Yeah I was shocked when I realised how easy it was to pull me into nonsense.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/15 10:27 PM
1

added a small one but honestly it won't take more than a few minutes to read.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/15 05:46 AM
1

It took me a few exchanges to get it but I agree. I'm going to do a more complete post when I have time.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/09/15 05:19 AM
1

I come from a large family and when I was younger I went through a similar phase. If someone was going out I wanted to follow. If someone told a joke I wanted to tell a better one. The reason I did this is because I was really insecure and wanted to be seen as funny/interesting/confident, but everyone could tell it was coming from a place of weakness and neediness. To fix the problem I forced myself to stay quiet. I didn't try to to insert myself into others plans or conversations. Being quiet h…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 11:24 PM
1

Thanks for the advice. I was planning to set a strict time to be in bed and read until I fall asleep. If that doesn't work I will try this out.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 10:39 PM
3

You bring up valid points. I can see how I was acting a bit emotional earlier. Thanks for the awesome post will save this for when I'm having a day where my resolve isn't as strong as it could be.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 09:09 AM
5

The argument isn't adding anything so I'm not going to continue it. You can make assumptions of me that I did absolutely zero work. Thats fine. I can't convince you otherwise. I did the leg work and was still unsure. So I asked. I look forward to reading more of your post in the future even if we don't see eye to eye on this issue. I've never been nice to anyone here in MRP because for the most part, it's a bunch of grown men whining That is true lol. But thanks for the advice you gave. It is go…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 08:43 AM
4

Take some time to understand the difference between being a value giver and a value leecher, because all you're doing right now is value leeching. I was always taught to try and understand something before i try to teach it. I just made my account so over time I plan to add value to this sub as I deepen my understanding. If you don't want to be called a dishonest lazy fuck, don't post shit like "I have read through all the prerequisites, and I've been lurking on this subreddit for a few months a…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 08:36 AM
-1

Well put. I have been doing alot more STFU recently because my initial reaction is often too heavy handed but the advice u/Sepean gave should help me out a bunch.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 07:58 AM
5

This is what I mean man. I lurk I read but I don't remember everything that I read. I actually reread the thread but I couldn't parse out the important points. Sometimes you can't see the forest for the trees. It is possible that people miss things when reading. If you want to tell me hey It has been answered double check the post. If you want to tell me to delete the thread thats fine as well. I didn't come looking for a back pat or what ever you want to call it.I came for help, you might have …
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 07:54 AM
-5

You are probably cutting her some slack because of her pregnancy and she's sensing that you're now strongly committed to her, with the baby coming. You're not going to leave just because she's bad in bed, so she's cutting back on the sexual favors. Good point. I've wanted to be a father for a long time so in my excitement/nervousness I probably went too far on the beta comfort. If she cuts the bj short, tell her she's not done. If she doesn't continue, put on your pants and leave and don't show …
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 07:20 AM
2

Can you elaborate?
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 06:59 AM
2

Or I thought that the thread was a bit old and I was late to the party. But I still needed some advice so I wrote a new thread. We are here to learn and bounce ideas off of each other. Some posters like you and u/bluepillprofessor have a lot of knowledge. I respect that and I enjoy reading your post but the Condescending tone is unnecessary. If this thread is too similar or repetitive, just tell me, I can delete it.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 06:56 AM
-1

Thanks
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 05:45 AM
1

That is actually one that somehow slipped through the cracks. Will read it ASAP.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 05:38 AM
-1

Did you go through something similar when you had kids? Sex has always been a good barometer for the status of the relationship. I know pregnancy changes things I just wanted to know the RP perspective to this situation. I used to be very BP so I know sometimes I can be hyper vigilant on not back tracking. Thanks for the advice/reply.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 05:36 AM
2

Been attempting to fix my sleep schedule to wake up earlier to give my self time to meditate and do a quick workout and stretch in the morning before work. Old habits die hard and I'm having a hard time getting into bed before 11 consistently. So that's what I'm working on correcting this upcoming week.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/09/15 05:11 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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