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fdana9191 Archive

View 5 posts and 44 comments by fdana9191 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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14

The divorce was a collaborative divorce so besides each person having their own lawyer, there was a financial person and a parent coach. Neutral members of the “team”. The parent coach helped put together the parenting plan for the divorce agreement. What schedules and holidays look like and to help with handling the kids during and after divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/25 12:05 AM
9

This is why I feel I’m fuuuucked with dating.
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/25 12:34 PM
1

Ummm, this sounds amazing. I’ve never done Muay Thai kickboxing but the idea of doing that in the morning and eating well at the end of the day. Plus I had my divorce hearing yesterday and will be official when I receive the dated doc from the judge. I need someplace to go.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/25 07:27 PM
1

But to also clarify, I was saying it less about the financials and more that I didn’t want it to seem someone else was being with my kid all the time and I wasn’t around. I actually spent a lot of time with the kids while my ex seemed to check out a lot. And I’m going to miss that.
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/25 11:32 PM
2

For sure and agree. I felt weird sharing that detail and wanted to explain the why. But I know there are others way worse off and I feel for them. Probably shouldn’t have tried explaining it.
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/25 11:21 PM
6

Yeah mine moves out in a couple weeks. The rules have always been, AP doesn’t step a foot inside the house. She’s hired movers. No fucking way that dude is coming into my house.
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/25 12:35 AM
2

😂 😂 😂
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/25 02:31 PM
3

That’s such a crazy stat. No doubt her affair was going on for a long time even though she swears she started seeing him after she asked for divorce. I’m in a no fault state so I don’t really care to figure out how long it was going on … and I definitely have the means to figure it out but that doesn’t interest me. Even if she had plenty of time to mentally ready herself before asking for a divorce, I just can’t wrap my head around seeing someone let alone buying a house with a person… monkey br…
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/25 02:16 PM
9

My ex moves out of my house and into the house she bought with her AP in a couple weeks. It’s crazy how this drama is not unique. My therapist doesn’t think her relationship last. But honestly, I don’t care. I have two kids who will be in that house 50 percent of the time so would rather it not be fucked up environment but we will see.
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/25 11:54 PM
7

After all these months I’m finally able to separate the joint account and finances. I will truly be able to track expenses and bills. It’s been such a miserable mess. I’m also hoping that I will suddenly have more money with her out of the picture. Reading the posts on this subreddit show that this a common theme even when the guy is paying alimony and child support.
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/25 12:13 AM
4

You’ve captured this whole subreddit in one post. Well done. 👏
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/25 06:30 PM
3

Seriously. This is so on point.
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/25 06:27 PM
3

Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/25 01:14 AM
4

I filled out health forms in the waiting room so I had checked the boxes for symptoms with anxiety and depression. Then I sat with her and we talked. She asked questions like 1-10 how stressed am I. I’m a 10. And what do I feel with anxiety. For me, constant stomach knots and spinny head. She was like is there something stressful going on I your life. And then the whole divorce thing was out of the bag.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/25 01:13 AM
6

This is beautiful.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/25 07:14 PM
2

OMFG. This is amazing. You should write a book, I’d buy it.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/25 12:18 AM
2

This such a great response with a lot of helpful advice. I’m going to use these suggestions with my daughter. Thank you. Anything to help lessen the trauma this is having on my daughter and will have her is so helpful. Thank you again.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/25 08:46 PM
2

Im going to make these my top 5 goals too. I’ll just replace #4 with learning Defi/blockchain. I’m glad you’re finding your way and getting on your feet. Excellent goals and great mindset moving forward.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/25 10:56 AM
2

Congratulations on the new house! That’s got to be an awesome feeling moving on to this new phase. We’ll see how it goes with this house and me. Trying to learn more about DIY projects and being handy. I’m a total nerd that lacks the handy skills but learning.
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 02:53 AM
3

I’m going to keep the home. I’m going to do a loan assumption and remove her from the mortgage and buy her out. I met with my financial person that is working with this divorce and they said do it, keep the house. It has a really good mortgage rate from the Covid years. I was worried if it was too much house for me. It’s 4-bedrooms and some nice space. But as my financial guy said, if it’s too much home then sell it in a few years. But he said you have two little kids, there’s no such thing too …
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 02:22 AM
10

She’s in therapy now. I also have a younger one, almost 2, so I’m like what do you do with someone so young? I talked to my lawyer about the AP living situation and there isn’t anything I can do. We have parent/ family coach assigned to our divorce (we are doing collaborative divorce) and she said you shouldn’t introduce kids to new partner for at least 6 months preferably a year. But my STBX says she couldn’t afford to live around here without living with someone. (She makes 6-figures). It’s a …
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 02:11 AM
6

We did get a therapist for my daughter. We had her start a month before we delivered the bad news so my daughter would at least have some comfort with her. Surprisingly when we told her, she was more interested in the new house and what new toys she could get. But now the questions are starting come and I know this will be hard on her when we officially split ways. For me, I started therapy for the first time in my life 10 months ago. I think it has saved me. I don’t have family where I live and…
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 01:59 AM
8

My parents divorced when I was six and my dad got divorced a couple more times after that. I remember as I was growing up, I swore I would never get a divorce if I got married and had kids. And here I am, my daughter is the age I was when my parents divorced. I’m so sad that my girls will never have a true family that is together but this is what it is. So as I reshape my life … I want to try and be a great dad (not like my dad) and make this home I will have a happy one. I want them to have goo…
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 01:47 AM
5

Heh. Yesterday, my therapist said I need medication or to try this device called alpha-Stim for my anxiety. Still reading up on it. I guess after a year into this divorce mess and 10 months doing therapy, my body is breaking down from the knots in my stomach and my spinny head. Externally im good. I’m being there for my kids, I’m crushing my job and pushing through this divorce process. Inside I’m a fucking mess and don’t know if I will ever be happy again. That this is it. Everything is spinnin…
/r/Divorce_Men30/03/25 01:15 AM
3

This is my age group 😂 😂 😂
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/25 01:44 PM
11

I needed to hear this. My ex is buying a house with her AP and will be moving in soon (we’re still stuck in house together pending divorce settlement). I’m still grappling with the thoughts of my girls being around this person. Just have to focus on me and my kids. I’m the dad. Good post.
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/25 12:32 AM
3

I’ll be saving this post for future reference and pep talks. Sign me up coach. Well said.
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/25 12:20 AM
2

That sounds really nice. I’m still a bucket of different emotions as I move forward but I’m hoping things will start to feel better once everything is done. I’ll have a bunch of house projects to keep me busy once my ex moves out.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/25 06:39 PM
3

That’s good to know. Appreciate the positive note. Gives me hope.
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/25 11:35 PM
4

This is an amazing post. I’m in holding pattern until divorce finalized but will have 50/50 with my two girls. Love this perspective.
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/25 05:21 PM
3

This made me laugh and “cry”. I’m 51 with divorce settlement about to be submitted to court. Not ready to date but oh boy yeah, I’m afraid the dating pool will be trash when I’m ready. Especially someone my age with two little girls under 7.
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/25 03:43 PM
9

You win the prize for the best response.
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/25 06:44 PM
1

This.
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/25 01:10 PM
2

Cool. I’ll give it a go. My divorce is almost complete but I’m looking for more help. I do gym and therapy but I want some additional help. Thank you for the extra info. I appreciate it.
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/25 11:26 PM
1

I was thinking about joining a DivorceCare that starts next week. I’m not sure now if it’s just loaded with a bunch of women. But you still found it helpful?
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/25 09:33 PM
1

Damn. I should hire you as a coach once I’m done with my shit show.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/25 11:34 PM
2

This caused me to pause. I’m not ready to date yet (finalizing in a few weeks) but I feel like I should reread this post before I do go on dates. I can see how laying it on someone new that you just got divorced could cause them to look at you as weak or damaged or be hyper focused on the divorce. Of course depends on where and how you meet someone, they might ask your status. Then you say I just got DIVORCED and breakdown in tears. Kidding …
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/25 01:17 AM
5

Way to fight for your daughter. Enjoy this weekend with her and the soon to be other weekends with her. Makes me sad hearing how long it’s been since you’ve seen her. Keep battling.
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/25 08:32 AM
1

This is a great list. Making a copy of this for my own shit show. Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/24 03:34 PM
7

This was a great post and something I needed to read. It’s been almost 5 months since my wife dropped the D bomb. Besides hitting the gym and reading this Reddit group, I’ve been going to therapy. I’m using therapy to help cope with this shit show but also try and come out a better person at the end. Figure out and own the mistakes I made in the marriage. But going through this I’m slowly realizing I willfully ignored or brushed aside a lot of my wife’s issues and not recognizing that this isn’t…
/r/Divorce_Men09/08/24 01:34 AM
1

Great advice. I’m bookmarking this response for sure. A reminder of the upside once the hell of going through this divorce is over.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 10:39 PM
1

I needed to hear this. Thank you. I’m about to go through collaborative divorce but we’ve already agreed that I get 50/50 with our two little girls. But overall this still feels like a sh*t show.
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/24 06:49 PM
1

Great post. Going through this right now and I have 2 young daughters. Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/24 05:48 PM
1

I needed to hear this too. Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/24 11:41 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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