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fg_hj Archive

View 4 posts and 205 comments by fg_hj on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

To me it sounds like an attachment trauma that is constantly being triggered. The healing from attachment trauma is to be in relationships where you feel truly safe and seen. It will always trigger you if you don’t have your needs met. So he should absolutely meet them if it’s going to hold.
/r/RedPillWomen28/06/26 09:03 PM
1

Many women have non-consensual experiences, it's very common. Why we should not judge women on body count in the first place, many who are in the normal range have one or two that was non-consensual.
/r/RedPillWomen27/06/26 08:44 PM
1

Women sharing info like this saves other women's and children's lives. Not saying you should have done it, as it ofc depends on the individual situation, but it's a matter of fact that many women have gotten out of abusive relationships because of these groups. I will always support women saving other women's lives, even if it means that some woman badmouthes her ex saying he has bad breath.
/r/RedPillWomen27/06/26 08:42 PM
4

A man being promiscuous is super off-putting to women. It's only because the sexual culture heavily favors men's preferences in patriarchal societies that we see that the sexual preferences are largely based on what men want and not what women want.
/r/RedPillWomen27/06/26 08:18 PM
9

The basic principles of fds are literally a requirement to be happy. Being a woman you cannot just exist you have to actively fight the indoctrination. What I envy men the most is that they can just exist. They are humans by default. Their humanity, integrity, rights, individuality, needs etc are not questioned or temporarily granted. They can have lots of things to fight for, but its a choice. They don’t need to fight for anything by default as they have the basics and they have peace in that. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/22 01:45 PM
13

It really is too bad. What I got the most of here was when someone made a book review. I’ve learned so much from the books recommended here and the books I’ve read because they were referenced in said books. They have fundamentally changed my perspective. They are books that have increased my empathy for women a lot. Away from the cold, cynical, and without empathy way our culture views women by default. I share my newfound knowledge with everyone. We need a feministic revolution.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/22 10:42 AM
4

Was it gone at some point? It’s a long time since I was here and it’s very different now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/22 10:26 PM
7

Are people other than the mods not allowed to post? It’s only that one mod who posts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/22 10:03 PM
1

That’s the thing. It’s not about being into anal but the circumstances of it. Anal is extremely intimate. I like it and find it more intimate than vaginal sex. But even if you like it you still have to avoid men who are into it because it’s a red flag and it’s not a loving and intimate act to them. They like it because they see it as degenerate, derogatory, and reminds them of porn. Men have ruined anal. Imagine if it was seen as an act of love.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/22 09:21 PM
2

I read it as if he could he would go for 16 year olds.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/22 09:01 PM
1

Almost all comparisons between men and women’s circumstances are shameful. I feel like we compare them to make them more relatable to men. Like, if I want a man to understand something women face I’d have to compare it to something he can somewhat put himself in. But it just doesn’t exist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/22 08:53 PM
3

I’m really sorry. How did they show they saw you as inferior?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/22 08:44 PM
1

If women dominated in our society looks, make up, weight, age, etc wouldn’t matter. Making a hierarchy based on fuckability is entirely a consequence of the male gaze. My male friend said that men’s privilege in this is that they stand above the (natural) hierarchy of sexual attraction. Everyone likes attractive people more. But men can achieve everything and be ugly as fuck. It’s possible because women’s sexual selection has no power over them and doesn’t limit them. Our society is made by and …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/22 07:43 PM
87

Have you read “why does he do that”? He gives examples of how men manipulate women through victimhood. A comment on the psychologist’s comment: abusive men are very capable of showing fake understanding of her. Say, he says she hits him but he understands that she could be driven to do that. That may sound genuine right? But he knows he has to show understanding and submissiveness towards her in his fake abuse story to get people to believe him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/22 05:59 PM
8

Isn’t it also an oxymoron? Men claim that they have become emasculated. But somehow that means that men can’t sexually harass women anymore. As if the masculinity they feel they are lacking should somehow come from excessive masturbation and porn use, contempt for women, sexual entitlement, and sexual harassment. But expressing healthy masculinity like what FDS expects and which every woman want men to do and is very attracted to is not the desired masculinity to too many men. All men can come i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 09:30 AM
56

To women getting baby trapped is a severe sexual assault, to men getting “baby trapped” is when they baby trap themselves by not wanting to use a condom or other kinds of birth control. Men getting baby trapped by a sexual assault is so very very rare they never have to consider it. It only exist in their vocabulary when they blame women for their own “semen assaults”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 09:02 AM
7

Yes and studies of such knew terms and diagnosis are more strict in their definitions. Here it has to have a significant harm to the woman’s work life or social life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/21 09:28 AM
21

In the study the amount of sas was way lower than I had expected (3.2 %). But maybe I just overestimate it. I thought it was very normal for women to have used sex as self harm in one way or another. But good on them for defining such a term. It’s very needed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/21 10:01 PM
50

The most common response of a woman hearing about PSD for the first time has been: “Finally! Someone’s given a name an an explanation to what I’ve been feeling all my life, wondering, what’s wrong with me!” My response to the book title. I really needed that term. What do you think about the book?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/21 09:21 PM
4

If it’s possible, try to detach from the romantic feelings as much as possible and really connect with the feelings and gut feelings that are being overshadowed by them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/21 09:08 PM
159

You were right to unmatch due to him not liking to cook (whether he likes ethic food or not). Cooking is the chore with the most equity. Probably because it’s the one you can impress people with and which people show gratitude for. It’s also the most creative one. If he won’t even cook he’s not gonna want to do any other domestic chore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 06:29 PM
13

People need to completely back off with pressuring for kids. It does nothing but harm.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 09:23 PM
15

I really doubt men have ever been suitable to lead a family unit. The majority have always had abusive attitudes lurking beneath the surface if not expressed directly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 09:20 PM
1

When I click the link it says the app is not available in my country. But I see there are many alias apps to choose from. Some seems made for cheating…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 06:02 PM
1

I have an iPhone. Pinger doesn’t come up but other apps for number aliases does.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 04:44 PM
28

Wow he sounds amazing. There’s something about men being so commited to a child he isn’t biologically related to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 03:41 PM
34

This comment could be a post in itself
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 03:36 PM
31

I’m childfree as well. Keep it that way if that’s how you really feel. Imo being childfree is a huge privilege.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 03:31 PM
24

Your uncles sound amazing. How wouldn’t the world be if we all had fathers like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 03:28 PM
1

How do you use a throwaway number?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 12:42 PM
4

Seriously, good on you for telling it. Women have be aware of this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 12:27 PM
115

Same. When I ask guys (tho it’s men I personally know, not ones on dating sites) they only have non-answers for why they want or did have kids. They are just parroting the same generic responses. Also, “it’s an instinct”. No. You have an instinct to jizz, that’s it. You can’t have a biological drive towards something that only impacts another person’s body.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 11:38 AM
36

Even if going to a strip club means nothing to him and he’s just doing it because his friends are or has a reason such as a bachelorette party, his friends and social group are gonna erode him over time, and it means he doesn’t respect himself enough to not just blindly go with what his LVM friends want and he doesn’t uphold boundaries towards them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 11:01 AM
29

Wow I’m really sorry you had to go through that. Hope you are okay i now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 10:41 AM
56

I love your username. Yes. And the ones who actively and explicitly regret having kids are the ones who are forced to take on a big part of domestic labor against their will (such as if the mother can’t do it). I think most men would regret having kids if they were forced to do the same amount of labor as women do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 09:45 AM
36

Yeah I regret not getting the username on the screenshot. I’ve tried to search for it but nothing comes up and I’m pretty sure the post it was commented on was deleted due to being quite personal about the OP’s life. But people always censor usernames when reposting so I’d be doubting if it’s okay to give it away even if it was on the pic?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 09:29 AM
30

Absolutely. I screenshotted it a long time ago and I tried to search for sentences of it in quotation marks followed by “femaledatingstrategy” on google but nothing comes up. It was commented on a rather personal post about the OP’s dad so I’m pretty sure the post has been deleted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 09:26 AM
67

Ofc being HV doesn’t depend on wanting kids in itself. The comment just goes for people who want kids specifically. It’s a very strong message tho. The majority of men believe (and may believe very strongly) that they want kids but when it comes to it they don’t.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 08:59 AM
50

But it is normal. It’s entirely normal for men to be attracted to teenage girls and always has been. Men have been marrying barely puberscent girls since forever. Pretending this isn’t normal is to lower your guard for them. You have to actively rule out attraction to teenage girls in ALL men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 08:49 AM
1

Tho being HV doesn’t depend on wanting kids. This just goes for people who want kids specifically. It’s a very strong message for them tho. Most men believe (and may believe very strongly) that they want kids but they don’t. My downvote in the pic must have been a mistake.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 08:31 AM
74

Men have always traumatized women. Traumatizing women is a fundamental part of male-dominated societies. It increases men’s reproductive success to beat and rape women into submission. Anything goes as long as it happens inside the marriage or is done to women in societies/tribes they are at war with. Very few species have males even close to as brutal as ours. Men have explicitly evolved to be this way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/21 11:50 AM
1

Why?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/21 11:39 AM
12

You could warn her but it should be out of genuine compassion for her and women in general, not as a form of revenge.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 11:44 PM
41

For me it was internalized expectations. I had sex with some really disgusting guys as a teen. I thought it was cool to not have any boundaries or self care or self worth because it’s what men like. What a nightmare to think back on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/21 10:44 PM
48

Sounds like that book gives terrible advice. You are right. Men know how much women work and choose not to acknowlegde it so they can get away with not contributing fairly. It’s so much in their favor, why would they change? Why would they even acknowledge there’s a problem?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/21 10:36 PM
26

With weapons, a man can take it from you and use it against you. People have to be really confident in themselves with a weapon for it to be worth the risk.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/21 06:22 PM
73

This extends to all female issues. And the men who do it always do it based on knowing literally nothing about the subject. It’s just feelings, knee jerk reactions, and contempt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 04:35 PM
65

I agree with the other commenter, the fear of being alone when older is a mostly male fear. Even if a woman is actually unhappy and unfulfilled while single it’s still better than being with a LVM by such a wide margin that there should be no fear of singledom whatsoever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 04:14 PM
364

Hates fat women or sees any subgroup of women as below other women/people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 02:42 PM
23

I think it says that the violence has 3x as longer-lasting physical damage. Anyway, it’s a no-brainer that violence from men is worse than from women. It’s also not clear if gay domestic violence is included because that’s what causes most of the DV damage for men. Could explain why the number is so low.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 11:47 AM
9

I like it but only when it’s entirely on my terms. I find it sexy and will do it in a relatively superficial way of not having the dick very deep, just playing with it with my tongue however I want, with no intentions of making him cum or for it to last longer than a few minutes at absolute max. This I find genuinely enjoyable. Another enjoyable way for me is doing a 69. When he goes down on me my otherwise sensitive gag reflex is reduced, and if I orgasm hard it completely disappear making me a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/21 06:45 PM
64

Other people are never going to think as bad about it as you do. You are your own worst critic. They will probably just be happy for you when you find someone better. They will think higher of you the better you do for yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/21 05:00 PM
1

Yeah okay
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/21 09:52 AM
29

Men from other cultures are only harder to vet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 07:33 PM
0

Aren’t women demisexuals by default? I’m thinking it’s a “sex term” due to it being rare in men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 07:18 PM
22

I don’t want children either but maybe just imagining if they’d be “good enough” for an actual child is still telling. Most guys I’ve known I def would not trust with a baby. Otherwise think of pets instead.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 07:12 PM
32

What does 4x4 mean?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 07:06 PM
5

I can’t find it as a free eBook but I can find his other books. Do you know if they are as good or is The Batterer the one to read?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 05:01 PM
12

Hope you find time soon. You can find all the books on the FDS reading list on either that site or libgen.rs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 03:20 PM
15

The biggest correlator with a man turning abusive is that he had male role models who were abusive to women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 01:33 PM
52

Because of how vile the content is. Too much of that and it makes me feel sick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 12:43 PM
78

Here’s the book as a free eBook: https://dk1lib.org/s/Why%20does%20he%20do%20that%20Lundy%20Bancroft%20 All women have to read it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 12:35 PM
89

I take breaks too. I get easily triggered too and in the beginning the manosphere posts here were enough to make me not be able to use this sub. The low quality meme content and tiktoks do nothing good and attract men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 12:21 PM
57

There are subs like that but they are tiny and unknown. I think one of them is MRApatrol. I don’t remember the other names. But they will make you sick so I strongly recommend against them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 12:11 PM
53

It starts way before we start dating. The male dominance over us starts when we are children and strange men approach or ogle us, or men in our social circle starts to show sexual interest. For most girls it literally starts when they are children. They are never free from feeling how dangerous men are. If you exist as a girl in a male dominated society there will be a shadow over you from the moment you are born.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 11:07 AM
9

The underlying reason I don’t want kids is so I can live like a man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 09:23 PM
26

I think this depends on culture. The married people I know a generation older than me have all been married after a +6 years relationship and has stayed married for long.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 08:17 PM
1

I don’t have any book suggestions for this topic tbh. But “why does he do that” by Lundy brancroft as I referenced is a book all women should read.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/21 01:12 PM
26

Sounds really interesting, I’ll definitely read.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/21 12:49 PM
2

My male friend never had a dad. We talked about the consequences of not having a dad and he said he thinks he turned out well because he didn’t have one. The reason being that a dad will spoon feed you with masculine ideals which may not be healthy. Whereas without a close male role model you look at other males for guidance but you will be more critical to them due to not being intrinsicly close to them. You watch them and think “would I want to follow his lead?” But not all boys can be critica…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/21 11:07 AM
19

Posting sick content is a kind of masochism. And it harms everyone who sees it. I hate it, why would someone force me to see it when I’m just peacefully scrolling through this sub? Disgusting content should be outright banned here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 09:15 PM
14

True
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 06:40 PM
58

Rejection is a hit to your ego regardless of who the rejector is. If anything it could be a symptom of lack of self assurance since you need the validation of other people. About how to really find HV people, I ask myself this question too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 01:10 PM
65

When they reach a western country can’t they get their families over? If that’s the only way western countries allow it then I understand. Still weird there’s no fuss about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/21 09:12 PM
57

Yeah don’t trust people who give advice from the pov of what they’d like get/become instead of where they already are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/21 04:15 PM
98

And it goes back to the first female ape who chose not to mate over mating with someone who didn’t meet her standards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/21 03:59 PM
112

DM those women. DM people who need support. It’s so much more personal and comments get lost in endless meaningless streams of words anyway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/21 03:49 PM
142

I love reading about amazing dads
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 10:10 PM
70

The court does absolutely not favor women and it’s insane how common a myth that is. Lundy himself says the court, if anything, has a bias that favors men and he is talking from experince as a custody evaluator and guardian ad litem. He describes it in “why does he do that” in the chapter about legal battles.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 10:07 PM
44

Here’s free pdf’s and epubs: https://dk1lib.org/s/Why%20does%20he%20do%20that%20Lundy%20Bancroft%20 Every woman should read this book
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 09:59 PM
3

I’ve read the same in a pop science article. So clearly there’s studies that show that women need more variation. I feel this too whereas men are ok with having the same boring sex. I’d say the circumstances matter a lot and LTR’s have their own weird dynamics that can go against “natural”/instinctual/lower level sexual behavior (such as, all men want to cheat but most choose not to). I think when women want variation it’s due to the man not living up to her expectations (so, a social and cultur…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 07:52 PM
20

This is so true. Men have endless of endless outlets for their sexual needs while women compromise their sexual needs by default.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 11:37 AM
16

Reading the first paragraph I thought it was about humans. It would not be surprising whatsoever. Still, there needs to be some clear data on humans. Since such an experiment would be easy to do it should already be done.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 11:26 AM
194

They want to see many different naked women due to the Coolidge effect. Of lies, they say porn doesn’t lead to watching gradually more and more extreme porn even tho it clearly does. Also, that watching porn is somehow an instinctual need that can’t be controlled. All the lies and excuses are typical addict behavior.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 10:31 PM
2

Fetusses are violating women’s body if they are using it against her will. That itself is a violation, and a very extreme one at that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 09:13 PM
38

Same. The more LV the higher they think of themselves and think they are in every girl’s league. Imagine having the confidence and self esteem of LV males.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 07:32 PM
12

I’d say this is very different. Men don’t have to fear women but they have to fear other men. Men should not walk home alone either, they are more likely to get assaulted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 02:54 PM
90

Must be nice to be a man. To instinctly feel so safe around women because they are never a thread to you, if anything they will even save your face in case you are inapproriate. Tho good on you for not doing that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 02:02 PM
20

Obviously, expressing your negative feelings and maintaining social hierarkies are a very strong basic human instinct you can’t get around. People who can’t get to express it are victims. It’s very necessary that they can buy others to express it on, or we risk they go out and shoot up a mall out of frustration. We can’t have that, right?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 11:48 AM
7

Okay thanks
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 10:38 PM
17

About discriminating costumers I just watched an interview with a prostitute who said she screened all potential costumers and only allowed the ones she was sexually attracted to, because she gotta get something out of it too and she expected the sex to go both ways and that he cared about pleasing her. She said it was relationship-type sex. If sex work have to exist, women should have full control over every part of the process.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 10:35 PM
9

What post about pregnancies?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 10:20 PM
80

Was it once normal for a father to spend time chasing girlfriends while the mother took care of the family, as it states? Was cheating just completely socially accepted and expected or what am I reading?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 09:22 PM
4

How male porn actors are hurt by the industry is another point where men can begin the victim competition. mEn ArE HaRmEd tOo. Yes they very much are, both the tops and especially the bottoms. Just another reason men should quit porn. There’s no competition here - no one should be harmed by porn period.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 09:09 PM
62

It makes me think of the many men who just say they want kids while having put no critical thought into it whatsoever. It’s just the mindless default thing to say. While women who put a ton of thought and preparation into it feel extremely unprepared. How uncritical and unprepared men are gives me anxiety. Children deserve better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 08:30 PM
256

Isn’t it scary that you “knew nothing before having kids”? How can people even evaluate if they want kids if they have not even close to a clue how hard and difficult it is?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 08:09 PM
78

I wouldn’t. I don’t care about shared names. If it’s important to him he should take mine or we’ll make a combination. Otherwise it’s not about sharing a name but about following social norms just for the sake of it and I don’t do that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 05:07 PM
182

That’s exactly what I think when seeing otherwise hot older men. Put their forehead wrinkles, nasolabial folds, crows feet, saggy eyelids, and huge pores on a woman and she would look old and men would not consider her attractive. Same with grey hair. For men, bone structure is everything. For women, any signal of youth is everything.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 02:47 PM
14

They literally seek out delusions. They want to believe that’s reality. I guess it removes his feelings of having any responsibility for his own life as he can just blame everything on women and rich men while never doing any effort to improve his life or meet women irl. Not that I’d want such a man to interact with women irl as he doesn’t even see us as people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 02:35 PM
225

How is it even in any way true that men age slower?? Women generally age better up until menopause if anything. Women do age worse after menopause tho because sex hormones are so important for skin function.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 12:20 PM
5

Agreed
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 11:47 AM
19

Why isn’t it normal for women to raise children together. Bonus if it’s adopted/fostered children.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 11:13 AM
56

You really do come to some insane conclusions when you follow their logic
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 10:51 AM
74

“Don’t die sacrificing everything for your kids, show them how to live” or something along those lines. From Untamed by glennon Doyle.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 12:22 AM
1

Same. It’s a huge privilege
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 10:18 PM
17

Commenting so I can get back to this comment
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 10:08 PM
6

I’d say objective beauty is highly related to what’s functional and evolutionarily beneficial (symmetry, bone structure, proportions, sickness- and age factors). Here we are down at the instinctual level of what people find attractive. Cultural beauty norms are often ridiculous and detrimental to health and function.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 09:48 PM
10

Proper facial bone structure should be guided for functional reasons. The cosmetic effects are a bonus.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 07:19 PM
6

Facial bones continue to grow very slightly throughout our lives. And correct posture is better than incorrect posture in any case. But it’s probably not going to give visible or cosmetic results.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 06:45 PM
13

What we consider attractive just is really tied to a healthy bone structure. Good forward growth is so insanely important and causes other attractive features indirectly - a wide palate gives prominent cheek bones, upturned eyes, and a wide pretty smile and straight teeth, forward growing jaws give an upturned nose, it reduces eye bags, nasolabial folds and marrionet lines when older, they give a defined jawline and good facial proportions. That’s just the cosmetic effects, but the reason we eve…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 04:15 PM
126

Your words sow seeds. They take time to grow but she will think back on them the time she starts to see reality for what it is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 11:59 PM
5

Women adviced other women to stay in abuse at that time too. They are less likely to do that know, people are more aware of the signs of abuse. Tho it’s gonna take more time to become aware of these new era problems like porn and kinks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 11:51 PM
68

Misery loves company or whatever you say to such cases. It’s not acceptable that your mom guilts you into unhappiness because she couldn’t do better for herself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 11:18 PM
68

Yes I think this too. And i goes on an individual level too. I’m always too polite towards men as to not fuel male violence. Not violence towards me specifically but in general. Because we are told that men act violent because of how society and women treat them contra looking at the actual causes (bad male role models and acceptance of their violence).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 04:03 PM
458

You know old housewife magazines from the 50’s that adviced women to stay with abusive husbands and blamed women for the abuse because they clearly weren’t good enough wives? Today’s bad relationship and sex advice is just a new version of an old mindset.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 01:38 PM
22

Is it just shame over the past or do you actually regret not going for j? It just sounds like the whole thing is over now and there’s nothing to go back to, nor anything to regret. You made a mistake and you learned from it. It’s very strong of you. Your only mistake here as I see it, was to contact him again. You knew you shouldn’t have done it, you knew it was over and you need to start a new chapter.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 01:06 PM
12

Incelgram? Is that a media or is it supposed to say Instagram? Lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 12:57 PM
11

FDS doesn’t say anything I don’t already know. But it prevents denial, rationalizations, victim blaming, distorting reality in favor of men, acceptance of misogyni, etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 12:50 PM
84

To add to this: men who abuse women do it because their key male role models have been shit towards women. It’s not because they themselves have been abused. Abused men tend to become violent towards other men, not women. This is what Lundy Bancroft says based on what research shows. Tho it’s not black and white and there’s ofc an overlap. But in general, abused men do not abuse women. Abusers will claim to be victims (especially victims of abuse from women) to gain sympathy tho
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 10:09 AM
26

Yes that will tell you so much about them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 07:50 PM
6

The lining grows back. Doesn’t it only last for something like 6 years? Regardless, it shouldn’t be a form of birth control.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 07:15 PM
106

Strongly agree. Men are always presented as victims in this subtle propaganda-like way. You don’t see it unless you have been made aware of it. It just gets internalized as the truth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 06:49 PM
251

To add to this, Lundy Bancroft says that the biggest cause of a boy growing up to be an abuser is having had key male role models who treated women badly. It has nothing to do with them being abused themselves. When they see others do it they imitate. Tho, boys who have been abused are more likely to be violent towards other males but not women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 05:43 PM
9

Just existing as a woman gets you so much shit from men. While for men, if they have their egos hurt the tiniest bit it’s the end of the world and they are huge victims of misandry. Their brains would explode if they had to live as a woman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 05:35 PM
15

Men label themselves as superior. Believing them is like believing a narcissist or megalomaniac describing themselves. Meanwhile women chronically and severely underestimate themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 05:31 PM
9

Yeah I see what you mean now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 02:44 PM
29

I don’t think it’s ever a luxury to have children early. Why have kids while they are still girls themselves? While they are still closer to being teenagers in their mentality than adults? I think women having kids in their early 20’s is a sign they didn’t take care of themselves or wanted the best for themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 02:29 PM
145

Yes, men react to women’s words as if it was violence. Meanwhile men can be blatantly misogynistic with no consequences and they will never have to feel threatened or silenced by women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 02:21 PM
50

How can this even be controversial. How much do we need to warp reality to accomodate men’s feelings. Men are the ones who date up while women mostly date down, unfortunate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 10:25 PM
10

Agreed
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 02:38 PM
4

My biology teacher in high school said that women can normally smell men’s pheromones and will like the smell of mates who would be good generic matches, and that taking the pill disrupts this. So women who go off the pill may suddenly not like their partners smell. While this article only explores the factor of appereance, smell have such primal and instinctive responses that I’d think that matters more than how you view their appereance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 12:59 PM
294

Marriage benefits men more than women in every way. Financially too. They come to earn more while women come to earn relatively less, and if divorce happens it affects men positively while making women have a way higher risk of ending up in poverty. Guardian article The research paper Edit: I mixed up two papers. This is the paper behind the The Guardian article. The other paper is another big study that also shows that women get worse off financially after a divorce while men get better off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 11:16 AM
110

Women would experience less drags from fathers if men truly considered if they actually want kids. I think most men don’t want them but believe they do. It should be their own responsibility to educate themselves on parenthood before hand, but still, it could be a larger cultural problem of viewing parenthood through rose-colored classes and believing it must be something that will make you happy, why would everyone else do it if it didn’t? Surprise, people with children have lower quality of li…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 10:56 AM
9

Someone e-mail them and ask why they make such an example. It may have an impact.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 01:48 AM
39

God the sensitivities. Literally no man who doesn’t identify with killers would be offended by the aggressor being a man. Stop protecting male killers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 10:23 PM
9

I’m curious in what way they were more disgusting. And if it’s periods that add something to it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 08:43 PM
15

When it’s brought up on reddit there’s both people saying the women’s and the men’s bathrooms are the worst in their experience of cleaning bathrooms. I think people just assume women are better because it’s a stereotype that women are more hygienic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 08:41 PM
52

Marriages ending is just part of the process. It’s absurd to think humans stay combatible their whole lives as if we, and our partner, never change. The failure is to believe change is wrong and unnatural.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 07:56 PM
127

Women in burkas get harassed. It’s about power.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 06:47 PM
-5

This woman’s behavior was out of the ordinary kind. Not something I’d expect from others, male or female.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 06:45 PM
21

Unfollow that sub and don’t visit it. It’s not worth the mental toll. It’s vile. It’s a tiny tiny unknown sub anyway and its words don’t matter.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/21 02:13 AM
14

Yeah I’m really sorry this is happening.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/21 02:08 AM
20

Can you change your routines so that he can’t decipher them? Park a different place, change routines at work so he can’t get over to you in a break or “accidentally” bump into you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/21 12:48 AM
21

It’s several years since I read it so not sure but I don’t think so. I think it’s crucial to inform other people of the risk of it escalating. He gives examples of restraining orders and court orders escalating stalking and violence so I think it only goes for such more extreme measures. He says most stalker-types go away by just avoiding them as much as possible and not react to or follow anything they do or say, and just not in any way play their game.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/21 12:35 AM
97

Entitlement and they don’t value your agency. This sounds like an example that could be in “the gift of fear” by Gavin de Becker. He would say: never escalate, avoid contact with them entirely.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/21 12:22 AM
4

This is indescribably vile.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/21 12:05 AM
53

3/4 of reddit is male
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 10:53 PM
186

Statistically, they most likely do know a sex offender without knowing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 10:51 PM
15

Jesus Christ I don’t know what to say
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 03:15 PM
10

Are you sure they thought you were his girlfriend and not just a hot daughter? Because that sounds very extreme. I can’t imagine anyone thinking a 15 yo is the girlfriend of an adult man?? Not that it isn’t super inappropriate regardless, but thinking you were his girlfriend takes it on another level.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 03:09 PM
2

Didn’t know anything about his wife or that she was a writer too. What book do you like the most from her?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:38 PM
16

This reminds me of “Untamed” by Glennon Doyle. I think you could recognize a lot in it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:36 PM
36

In my country it’s 15 and there’s no limits to that, a 40 to could have sex with a 15 yo. I think an unrestricted age of consent should be higher, like 21, and people younger than that have restricted ages of consent where partners have to match their age group. There should just be more nuance to it. Edit: reworded it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:20 PM
6

Yes and it goes out as much to women as to men. Mothers can have the biggest martyrdoms.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:00 PM
47

Don’t most girls discover this when they reach puberty? Seriously asking. It’s my impression a lot of girls get perved on in some way or another starting at 13.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 01:44 PM
60

Having children gives people access to a whole new level of claimed victimhood.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 01:01 PM
61

First time I got tested it was a guy I dated who insisted on it. I didn’t know it was something you should do just to be sure. We went to a clinic that only did std tests so you knew why everyone was there. All of the people were young responsible couples or singles. It was really no big deal and didn’t feel embarassing at all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 12:35 PM
28

This made me gag
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 11:26 AM
28

What is it with all this “skidmarks” and “not wiping their butts”? Is it a reference to something? I see comments with it regularly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 11:16 AM
36

This sounds like depression
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 11:13 AM
1

Yes, it makes sense for me now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 10:15 PM
22

Hmm. I hated men since I reached puberty. But I didn’t have many boundaries towards them due to very low self esteem. So I felt used, and because of this I felt resentment towards girls who had more self respect and boundaries. Saying girls here because I was a teenager at that time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 09:57 PM
1

I see. It’s offensive and I shouldn’t have used that as an example.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 09:36 PM
2

I see. Thank you for writing that out, it was very clear and precise.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 09:35 PM
-19

Do you disagree with the post putting non-FDS women down harshly, and that being misogynistic?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 09:18 PM
-16

I think the content/tone of the post is misogynistic and I should have been clear about that instead of being vague in my first comment. Then it may have had a different effect. So, in case I’d said something along the lines of “I think the way you put other women down is misogynistic” would that be tone policing? And if so, how do you criticize another woman without being misogynistic yourself?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 08:52 PM
165

Yep, male attention from strangers peak at 13-17. So many women have that experience. Good of you to be protective.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 08:11 PM
254

It’s also important to know that a man can turn abusive at any point in a relationship. It can be after the wedding or after the birth of their first child or any other arbitrary point. So people should always be ready to reevaluate their relationship and be able to get out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 07:32 PM
12

Personally I really liked it. It def is controversial but in a way that just makes it more interesting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 07:24 PM
60

Just a warning, the book does not in any way demonize unethical behavior, it takes no moral stance. Reading a description of very predatory behavior (one example includes attempted rape) it can almost sound like the book encourage it due to not demonizing it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 04:48 PM
90

Speaking for myself, I was underlyingly envious of women who had standards and self respect. Literally. That was a shitty time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 04:29 PM
95

I’ve read The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene and while it’s actually a really good, honest, and detailed book, it was exactly because of that it became really gross sometimes when it gave examples of how men sexually manipulate women, teens, and children.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 04:18 PM
2

I meant that saying that you are sterile to someone you have casual sex with is meaningless. They don’t have to know. The fact that someone may pressure to not use condoms could be another reason to not tell but it could also be a reason to do it and gtfo if they suggest not using a condom.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 12:47 PM
9

Ah yes, all that rings true. Sadly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 10:59 PM
9

What’s ment with women project differently than men?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 10:14 PM
6

Do you get angry due to the content you consume? Because then be very strict with what media you use and what subs you follow and such. Just avoid things that drain you and make you angry. It’s not worth it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 09:06 PM
22

Most abusive men are not sociopaths or narcs. They don’t show any abnormalities on psychological tests. Psychologists also tend to have a bias in believing their side of the story. Source: Why does he do that, by Lundy Bancroft. He also strictly advice against couple’s therapy because of the risk of the therapist taking the man’s side. You say find an FDS-aligned therapist but do those exist?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 08:43 PM
13

Is it paid by the government? Can’t you always get checked at private clinics if you pay?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 06:40 PM
44

Yes it should become normal for a couple to have a fertility check as soon as they agree on wanting children, and then go from there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 05:04 PM
37

He confessed that he knew from the beginning but withheld it because he knew she would leave otherwise, why she had to get attached to him first so she would let him cross that boundary. This comes from himself, he had to confess due to guilt. Idk exactly when he got his sperm checked, probably in a former relationship for the reason you describe. The first infertile man she was with didn’t know it and they found out together. I’d never accuse someone of withholding it without evidence. As you s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 04:06 PM
74

For casual sex or unserious relationships it shouldn’t matter. But if one part wants a serious relationship and wants children in the future it’s crucial to be open about infertility. It’s cruel to lead someone on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:36 PM
74

Yes, women and sex are just trophies to a lot of men. The way they talk about women, and I mean just normal talk, is dehumanizing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 11:27 PM
186

There was a post on /seduction (several months ago) where someone who claimed to be a professional PUA said that his absolute biggest trouble with making his clients more desirable was to make them stop hating women. It’s very obvious that a man cannot attract a woman if he hates women, women can feel it. But just the fact that that was the biggest trouble was super fucked up. Also, how the hell do manosphere men imagine having a girlfriend? Do they think they can have a healthy relationship wit…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 10:30 PM
61

Why every person should read “why does he do that” or similar book on domestic abuse. Abused women are of high risk of being disbelieved, accused of being an abuser themselves, or believed that they deserve it due to how they behave or to having stayed with their abuser instead of escaping.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 07:00 PM
34

Mods being faster than light
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 04:05 PM
34

I very much agree but does reporting it do anything since the content is not against the rules? It’s pointless to report if it’s just bothering the mods without changing anything.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 12:27 AM
58

For someone who doesn’t want kids, reproduction sounds oppressive as hell.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 12:13 AM
57

Catcallers are not in any way seeking to compliment or be kind. They do it to dominate women, to harass them, to know they can do it without consequences. They enjoy the power play.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 12:06 AM
204

Always and only use your personalized feed, and be very critical with what subs you follow. Have a zero-tolerance to misogyni or anything that drains your energy (that include subs that crossposts bad subs to ridicule them). Click to remove suggested subs when reddit occasionally suggests misogynistic subs. Reddit is not worth it any other way than this. Seriously. Edit: this is why I don’t follow FDS. There’s lots of links and screenshots of misogynistic content. I come here when I feel like it…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 11:01 PM
23

Very much this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 10:41 PM
2

Yes this. He may become lazy and entitled and thinking way too high of himself. Believing she owes him or should be grateful and cater more to his needs. It’s where abuse begins.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 09:49 PM
31

Plain and simple
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 09:35 PM
185

So true. Rapists rarely think they are rapists. And abusive men in general rarely believe they are abusive. As Lundy Bancroft says, if the man verbally attack and manipulate his wife he’s not an abuser because he doesn’t hit. If a man hit his wife he’s not an abuser because he doesn’t hit her in public or make marks that can be seen. If he hits her any place he’s not an abuser because he doesn’t sexually abuse her. If he sexually abuses her he’s not an abuser because he has never abused her to t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 08:51 PM
1

Yes, being a SAHM is so risky. Sure some women have good experiences with it but in general women should be adviced against it. Mainly for the financial reasons but also because a man will respect a woman more if she isn’t entirely dependent on him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 08:00 PM
27

Exactly. The problem is their superiority complex, entitlement, and lack of empathy. Any mental disorders they suffer from are secondary to this (except for antisocial and narcissistic personality disorder).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 04:11 PM
27

Sure. It wasn’t directed towards you specifically but just a general “you should know” for whoever reads this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 03:45 PM
3

Why was your post deleted?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 03:42 PM
34

I just want to note here that a man that tries to get a woman out of an abusive relationship is more likely to be an abuser himself since some abusers have a preference for women who are in abusive relationships. That’s because she’s already very vulnerable and so, he can be her hero and she lowers her guard easily, and he knows she will be more likely to take abuse later on as that’s what she’s used to. This is why it’s rather common for abused women to go from one abusive man to the next.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 02:39 PM
10

Well observed
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 02:31 PM
17

I hate the Karen meme/insult. 9/10 abusive customers and aggressive strangers trying to dominate you are male. Who even thought of giving it a female image when it’s so obviously detached from reality. Literally everyone has a lot more negative experiences with strange men than strange women. A Karen isn’t even abusive, just complaining. She’s not a societal problem unlike the male equivalent.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 02:22 PM
8

And this is the general outcome for women. Men do better financially after a divorce while women get so screwed and suffer financially many years after. Gender Differences in the Consequences of Divorce: A Study of Multiple Outcomes
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 12:27 PM
9

True. Women failing at something or doing something suboptimal or expressing a negative trait results in a generalization on all women. While that doesn’t happen with men, they are individuals. It’s a subconscious bias where people will truly believe that a case of a woman being a bad leader, for example, means that women are generally worse leaders then men, tho men screw up to a much higher degree and do a lot more fucked up things in general.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/21 09:42 PM
99

Cunnilingus was also looked down upon and a taboo. Better keep women ignorant or shameful of sexual pleasure so men have nothing to live up to
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/21 07:36 PM
7

In “why does he do that” by Lundy Bancroft he also says that abusive men have big victim complexes and often blame women for their abusive behavior. And this is seen everywhere on the internet. The male victim complex has no end, and reality need to be warped and turned upside down to no end to come to the conclusions that men are such overwhelming victims. Reddit is really bad at this, and still, most of the time men make a claim of how unfair the world is towards them the claim is factually in…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/21 05:49 PM
1

What a good article. Most women can relate to what she’s saying.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 03:01 PM
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