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freerollerskates Archive

View 8 posts and 271 comments by freerollerskates on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Ok, bye. Hope you enjoy giving the dregs of society the benefit of the doubt to prove me wrong...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/22 05:22 PM
1

You're not obliged to date people whose personal health issues or neurodivergencies impact you negatively. I was married to a man on the spectrum for a decade. It was fucking miserable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/22 06:25 PM
3

Give him written notice, change the locks while he's out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/22 06:54 AM
10

Why should there be? That would basically give hobosexuals squatters' rights. No thanks. Your either married or you're not. All the people who say "oh we don't care about getting married" are 90% fooling themselves. If you really don't care but you have either assets or children that would benefit from the protections of marriage then just get married. Nobody's making you have a big fat gypsy wedding. If you have independent means and you don't have kids (like many people who are older for examp…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/22 07:12 PM
41

I'm halfway through a "blame" divorce, where my ex said he would pay for the divorce if I admitted infidelity under unreasonable behaviour (he'd screwed anything that moved for ten years, plus physical, sexual, financial and emotional abuse and I had a chaste "affair" with someone that I'm still with 2 years later, so I feel zero guilt for this). The advice my lawyer gave me was "how often have you read someone's divorce papers?". For me the answer is once, and only because my friend showed me. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/22 10:41 PM
3

Yeah you can do that, but it's not a good foundation for a relationship when food is such an integral part of cultural life. That's before you consider the cost implications of having to buy 2 lots of meal ingredients or just never eat together. If you don't eat the same foods (more or less) you can't fully participate in life together, so what's the point?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/22 07:12 AM
1

My ex husband "banned carbs"- that's why I wasn't allowed to cook spaghetti or potatoes, but he was still allowed to drink beer. LVM make no sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/22 07:08 AM
1

I agree with this. It's about what you can manage and feel comfortable with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/22 07:06 AM
2

"I don't like onions" to me would be no big pieces, or raw onions, or as a main part/flavour/texture of the dish. That's what most people who have ever said to me "I don't like onions" means, which is pretty understandable. Not complete aversion to small diced onion pieces cooked well in a sauce to add flavour. Also he did not say beforehand.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/22 07:00 AM
40

In the UK this would come under the Revenge Porn laws and that person would face criminal charges.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/22 11:55 AM
71

I think the LV bit comes with silly, immature or unworkable things - like guys who won't eat any vegetables or only eat a choice of 3 meals. I agree that other dietary requirements are just incompatibility but I'd still consider someone LV who demanded you change your lifestyle to fit theirs as opposed to just saying "oh, this isn't going to work".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/22 09:49 PM
64

Exactly this. I have a colleague who is vegan - apparently she was vegetarian at uni and started eating meat again to please her boyfriend, which is just bonkers. Her partner now is vegetarian (happy to eat vegan but might not say no to a cheese sandwich) and very in tune with her values and lifestyle, as opposed to someone else she was fitting around. There will be someone out there whose lifestyle matches with yours, but don't settle for someone who doesn't fit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/22 09:45 PM
25

But you and your husband can both deal with that, for many people it's too much. You've found someone that fits you, and I'm happy for you about that. This personally would be way too much for me as I am a very adventurous cook and I don't plate up neatly. My ex was on the autistic spectrum and it was hellish trying to live my normal life around that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/22 09:39 PM
61

I think with this there are so few people for whom seafood is a big part of their life that for most people it would not be a dealbreaker, but yeah if you met a seafood trawlerman or something I don't think you could blame him for saying that you weren't a good fit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/22 09:35 PM
66

This is one of the major ways in which my boyfriend is a major upgrade on my ex husband. My ex would use my accomplishments either to point out how far behind him I was, career wise, or to demonstrate that I was worthy of his time (heavy implication being that I wasn't most of the time). Any attention or pleasant treatment would be restricted to times when it would reflect on his generosity, not my accomplishments, so for example he would buy flowers for an anniversary, and have them sent to my …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/22 08:52 PM
85

My ex arranged for my son (age 7) to send me a card and have flowers delivered. I sent a text to say thank you but I honestly do not want him to do those things and it made me very uncomfortable. I would have been quite happy with the card made in school.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/22 01:13 PM
200

I'm inclined to disagree (not about the listen to your gut bit) but the other day I looked at what I have on fb and there is a lot of trash on there that I'd completely forgotten that I'd followed. It's easy to do if you don't actually interact with that page/person much and the algorithm pushes it to the bottom, especially if he doesn't actually use facebook that often. Do listen to your gut, but also bear in mind that facebook usage is dropping like a rock, so if he's only on there now and the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/22 08:53 AM
3

So much of a "number's nerd" that he can't use a fucking apostrophe properly. Busy spelling BOOBIES on your calculator in English class, were we?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/22 12:04 AM
7

If you're commenting on your partner's body it should be from a place of care. "You've put on weight recently and I'm worried that you're not taking care of yourself" is fine but this shit, to a woman who honestly sounds insanely physically fit, is just appalling and clearly an attempt at control.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/22 08:36 AM
11

Tell his family that in your medical opinion you think he is in the early stages of dementia due to his delusions about you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/22 11:06 AM
109

Exactly this. I effectively dumped my ex husband by whatsapp. Sounds pretty harsh but over the years we had so many of these conversations where I would be upset and he would say "we just need to communicate more" or "we just need to be nicer to each other" or "we just need to try harder". Loosely translated, that means "be a perfect wifey while I stay out all night, drink all our money, screw college students and then make it your fault when you get upset". I did not need to have that conversat…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/22 12:22 PM
13

They all say that, but even if you took this shitty deal I guarantee you'd end up doing the chores and the childcare anyway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/22 08:07 AM
11

So I think it's basic respect and good manners to dress up for your partner (within reason). If the expectation for date night is that he also puts on a nice suit, is freshly shaved or well-groomed beard, groomed body hair (no trunk jungles, thanks chaps), then I think it's a reasonable expectation that she also from time to time make an effort to look nice. I think the problem here is how he's phrasing it. This isn't quid pro quo, this is "I ordered a model and now I have buyer's remorse becaus…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/22 01:41 PM
184

When I worked for a member of Parliament, my employer (a gay man) championed a domestic abuse organisation, focussed on encouraging employers to take practical steps to help people experiencing domestic abuse, such as arranging for them to be in a back office instead of out front, not having them answer the phone, help changing bank accounts and other practical steps. It's a really good initiative and we were trying to get local businesses to sign up. We made a fb post about it and it actually d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/22 09:40 PM
14

Sounds very similar to my ex husband, who I left in May 2020 in the middle of lockdown. I had a great plan to leave, which would have worked too without covid restrictions, so here's what my plan A was. Whatever you do, don't give the game away that you're leaving. Quietly pack and remove your stuff to a friend's house or your car trunk if it all fits (I rented a storage unit and filled it while I was at work). Make sure you get any valuable or sentimental items out. Make sure you have all neces…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/22 08:00 PM
62

Mme Macron was Emmanuel Macron's teacher when he was a minor and she was an adult. If they had met as adults I would say good on her, but as is she has no shame, and if the sexes were reversed we would see it as the predatory behaviour it is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/22 11:29 PM
70

I love this. Reminds me of what we used to do at university when we wanted a guy to go away - we'd play "The Bin Game". Someone starts talking about rubbish bins- can be any kind of bin and the other people who know about the bin game start talking like it's the most exciting thing in the world and then the guy who we wanted to go away thinks we're really weird so fucks off at which point we resume normal conversation. It was surprisingly effective!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/22 11:07 AM
31

I have two instas - a public and a private. I'm in a sort of PR job so it's quite important for me to interact with people in my industry and influencers on this platform and I only put very banal photos on it- ones to do with my job or things like scenery etc. My private one is where I share my selfies, pics of my home, my family etc. It's also under a nickname that only close friends call me so it's harder to find. I don't give out my private insta to anyone except real friends and family, but…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/22 11:52 PM
6

I had to do a double take because I seriously thought for a second this was my ex husband. He's not even that bad looking, but his personality is fucking rancid.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/22 07:31 PM
32

The Ricky Gervais quote at the bottom of that graph kills me every time I hear/see it. Ricky Gervais always seems like a low key good guy to me. He can be a dick in his comedy but that's clearly a persona for effect - he's been with the same woman for 40 years and actually writes really interesting female characters (WHO ARE IN AGE-APPROPRIATE RELATIONSHIPS!!!) He's not married to his partner but that looks like it's a mutual choice, so fair play if that's what they both want. Any idiot can get …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/22 04:36 PM
10

My favourite age gap is Joan Collins and her husband. He just seems like a gent. And considering she's nearly 90 and they still look great together fair play to her!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/22 04:27 PM
105

I live in a really pakistani area - shit like that happens all the time. It would definitely be worth speaking to a solicitor first though in case she needs a non-molestation order or something. It's always best to get that shit official then take off to wherever she pleases, then when he kicks off and tells the police she's "kidnapped" the kid (it happens a lot with abusive men) the police can say "she can do what she likes, she's got a court order, off you fuck fella".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 10:07 PM
34

Oh good as long as you're not missing anything valuable/important.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 10:03 PM
45

Did you get your stuff back?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 07:52 PM
183

Oh and I hope she's got those comments in writing because then she can go to the police for sending threatening electronic messages. Unfortunately the UK family court system is so fucked up he could get contact just to spite her but given his family situation he won't want it and she can just rinse him for cash instead.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 05:03 PM
510

Step 1: SOLICITOR Step 2: Court mandated DNA test Step 3: Take him to the fucking cleaners.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 04:59 PM
7

My ex used to absolutely RAIL about single mothers - "washed up", "on the shelf", "wouldn't be a cuck for someone else's kid" - all the classic r*d p!ll talking points, and guess what he did a month after I left him? Hooked up with a single mother with a kid a couple of years older than our son is. He's moved her in to our house and apparently she now does all the cooking, he drives her car, she seems to be buying my son's clothes... It amuses me greatly because whilst I date a single and childl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 04:50 PM
87

Nearly made this exact post myself. I couldn't watch it all the way through because I just kept mentally screaming "HOW MANY RED FLAGS DO YOU WANT TO IGNORE?!" These weren't naïve girls, these were adult, successful women who chose not to pay attention to things that are clearly not right. I 100% am victim shaming, because this is plain dumb. Like those middle aged women who believes that Abdul the Egyptian waiter 30 years her junior believes she's the most beautiful woman in the world and loves…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 04:38 PM
13

Agree totally. I compare my bf to my ex husband by way of example. Example 1, Ex Husband: Son was around 3 months old, EBF. He had contracted rotavirus (d&v) and given it to me. We were both puking and going to the toilet a lot but I was also breastfeeding my son as you can't give EBF babies water or rehydration sachets as basically breastmilk is better than those. So I was going between feeding, changing nappies and throwing up. Not once did he offer to change a nappy or check in that we were o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/22 10:25 AM
181

Yeah exactly - if you don't have a literal sled to be pulling, don't get a god damn husky! A guy near me has one but he goes for a 5k run with him every day. You literally need to be doing that or they will destroy your house.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/22 08:48 AM
8

A dog is such a fucked up gift. I say this as a dog lover and someone who had to leave my precious boy with my ex husband and I miss him so much. I think even if you WANT a dog, feeling a connection with that animal is so important and you can't just have one picked for you and be expected to just love it. I'm seriously considering adopting a dog from Cyprus but I know there's a lot of commitment that goes into it and it's hard to decide if you have a connection with that dog online (just like d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/22 08:46 AM
8

I had to stop watching Sons of Anarchy because literally everyone on that show ended up getting raped it feels like. I guess as a woman I feel like I'm desensitised to male/female attacks because that's the world we live in, and so many of us experience it and have to just work through it to carry on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 05:25 PM
6

/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/22 07:10 AM
18

I'd even forgive "best butt" or something, as long as it was complimentary. This is just...humiliating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/22 11:53 PM
66

My dad used to wear these. And every pair of shoes he bought he took to the cobbler to put thicker soles on. He loved it in the 70s of course when you could wear platforms too! My mum absolutely knew he did it though- he wasn't tricking her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/22 01:05 AM
22

No spoilers, but I think Ricky Gervais knows this and it works out ok for everyone. I think the show is a nice exploration of grief - if you found The One and they die, why does society expect you must move on immediately? My mum was widowed very young and over the years has had pressure to find someone else but she has never wanted to. Yes she had 3 fatherless small children, but we had loving grandparents and extended family. She has had the odd date, and occasionally likes to meet someone to …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/22 12:11 AM
99

I found this sub because of people on another site calling a girl "entitled" for speaking openly about FDS and not putting out despite her being on the overweight side. Fair play to her for setting out her boundaries - I bet everyone calling her names was a real prize...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 11:34 PM
7

Where I'm from you call people "cock"!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 05:40 PM
7

He could have just sent flowers. Why cookies? It's a weird gift in any case.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 12:44 PM
9

That's very sweet of you. I plan to, one day...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/22 11:38 AM
126

"Yes, I think 30 seems fair for my wasted time, but I'd prefer cash over an app. Thanks."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 11:39 PM
69

This is precisely the problem that we have with the muslim (we call them Asian - what we really mean is they're from Pakistan and Bangladesh) grooming gangs in the UK. Because they're culturally muslim they have grown up in a highly patriarchal and misogynistic environment - many of the areas where grooming gangs have been prevalent have very ghettoised communities where they speak urdu, they only go to their own businesses, they intermarry within the community (and sometimes within their own fa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 10:58 PM
12

Well guess she called it correctly then!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 10:15 PM
12

So their strategy for becoming a high value male is... to become the ultimate zero value male? I don't get it. Honestly the best thing we can do is spread the gospel of FDS to our girlfriends. Red pill works by people not knowing about it. FDS works when people know about it. It doesn't even matter if men know about it, because if we're vetting properly we're not ignoring any red flags, and you can't fake everything about your life long term. A HVM shouldn't care about FDS because it's NOT about…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 04:33 PM
36

Contrast this with my bf, who offered to take me to ikea to buy some bookshelves for my house because they were too big for my car. I need one bookshelf and two DVD racks to fit the space. The DVD racks were in stock, so I bought those on my card, but the bookshelf was sold out, so I thought I'll come back next week. Without telling me he went online on his phone and signed up for an alert when they were back in stock. The alert came in at midnight that evening, but he didn't tell me. The next d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 10:17 AM
5

Scrotes gonna scrote, innit?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 10:00 AM
12

But who will do the washing up?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 09:55 AM
12

There are already cases of girls being sold to multiple men in a family, e.g. brothers because of a lack of women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 09:55 AM
46

This is my 2022 energy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/22 07:18 PM
35

CHECK. (and I cannot stress this enough) HIS. HARD. DRIVE.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 01:02 AM
10

Can I also say that it's ok to NOT want any of these things?! My ex husband was determined that we had a huge fairytale wedding, and actually made me change my choice of dress to a bigger one because "it wasn't what he'd always dreamed of". Everyone got so swept up in our fancy wedding that nobody noticed that it was a trash relationship. People were more bothered about me arriving in the right sort of car than they were if I was happy or not. I hated virtually every second of it. I hated my dre…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/22 01:46 PM
38

I looked amazing after I had a baby, but then again I had no money because my ex husband took it all , so no money for food so is how I got super skinny, and haircuts were too expensive, so that's how I grew waist length hair, and taking the car out would have cost money so pushing the stroller up the hill gave me a really great butt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/22 05:27 PM
1

Text him something like "Hi X, I've not responded to your messages before now because I was hoping you'd get the message. We've been broken up a while now and I think I've made it clear I'm not interested in maintaining a friendship with you. I'd appreciate if you respect my wishes and don't contact me again." And if there's anything further than a "oh ok sorry didn't realise you feel that way, I'll leave you alone now" then escalate it. Bear in mind law enforcement are incredibly patriarchal so…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/22 10:42 PM
4

Literally SAME, except for the mohawk! My ex husband looks dreadful- his drinking is really catching up with him and making his face puffy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/22 10:29 PM
1

I think my bf(33) is objectively hotter now than in his 20s. He was a bit of an ugly duckling (slightly overweight, never really worked out, bad dress sense, thick glasses) and has over the last 2-3 years began working out (for health and fitness reasons mostly) and has changed shape and now looks objectively more masculine and handsome. He's improved his wardrobe, started using contact lenses full time and tweaked his hairstyle so that it suits his face better. He has one or two grey hairs (whi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/22 10:27 PM
-7

Disagree. Not sorry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 04:42 PM
-42

Even if you're pro abortion please don't ever say this. I had an unplanned baby with someone I shouldn't have but if you turned around to me and said I should have had an abortion and left him I'm sorry but I would punch you in the face. Women carry on with their pregnancies for lots of reasons and love their children in spite of allsorts that happened in the circumstances. Don't ever say someone's child isn't worth it. My ex husband is scum but my son is 100% worth it .
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 07:26 AM
681

This is the macro version of "I dunno, whatever you want to do I guess..."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 03:07 PM
76

She says she's 18 but she does look objectively young. If another teen had approached her you could be forgiven for thinking it was just youthful awkwardness but this was clearly an adult man who knew exactly what he was doing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 11:28 AM
1

I have friends who have needed surgery and fertility treatment due to iuds getting displaced and lodged in their womb linings, so it certainly has serious risks for her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 09:33 PM
14

You would hope you'd need a specific court order for something like that. In the UK we have things call deprivation of liberty safeguards, so the default is that a person is free to make their own choices unless you can prove that a specific action is going to hurt them. So for example in the supported living facility where I used to work we had a man with down's syndrome that made him predisposed to gaining weight, but you couldn't say to him "you can't have a cookie" because that would be depr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 07:04 AM
26

She was speaking very fast but it came across to me like she had never had an opportunity to say these things, and wasn't sure she would again so wanted to get everything out. Edit: I say this as someone who has worked with vulnerable adults and listened to multiple abuse disclosures including domestic abuse, sex trafficking, financial abuse and coercive control. This came across to me as a vulnerable woman stuck in a kafka-esque nightmare, not as a crazy person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 06:54 AM
64

He had dementia at the end due to AIDS, but never lost control of his money.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 06:50 AM
11

In ultimate lolz, A Man DMs me, in order to defend his reverse parking. I am not getting into private conversations with random scrotes, but suffice it to say it more than proved my point about the above.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 06:03 PM
51

Men who reverse park into spaces regardless of whether or not it's the practical option are a huge nope for me. You're just pretending it's the superior way to park, despite the fact that it literally isn't being the main reason people don't do it all the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 05:39 PM
4

I work in UK politics and survation are an absolute trash polling company that twist their questions and really lead their respondants so I would take this with a really massive pinch of salt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/21 08:57 PM
2

He's half right on the first one, but true to scrote form he has it twisted. Marriage (certainly in western European Christian tradition) actually played a huge part in protecting women and their children. Even if you look at Henry VIII he was not allowed by the Catholic Church to just ditch his wife because he couldn't get a boy. Even the literal patriarchy has recognised that women need and deserve a mechanism to protect them from being abandoned holding the baby.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/21 08:55 PM
73

50% custody is often a way of avoiding paying child support, so there's that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 09:40 PM
250

Last weekend my boyfriend and I were making out and he whispered into my ear "I'm going to make love to you now, really slowly and gently, because I know you like that..." and let me tell you male lurky scrotes, it was approximately infinity times hotter than "take my dick, you dirty slut", or the classic "tell me how much you love my cock".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 09:37 PM
239

You could always straight up lie? Buy a fake engagement ring, say your fiancee works overseas (if you really want to lay it on thick pretend he's in the military), make noises about how great this room would be for a nursery!!! I know you shouldn't have to but do you want to get what you want or not? Men lie all the time and would not give a shit about this. If someone is douchey enough to not sell you a house because they judge your lifestyle I think there's no immorality in lying to get what y…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 05:21 AM
56

My ex husband has the cheek to call me a gold digger when he has made off with £100k of my money.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 09:53 PM
11

I live near an area with a high level of prostitution. I am most definitely against the concept of prostitution, and I don't think sex work is work, in any way. The body is not a workplace, you are not the burger. Anyway, whilst I believe we should structurally aid women to exit the sex industry and provide skills and support to allow them to get meaningful and legitimate work, or appropriate social support, the fact remains that some women in the sex industry can be assholes as well as the men …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 06:09 PM
108

I watched Promising Young Woman lady night and I LOVED the part where the builders catcall her and she just stands there staring at them until they get uncomfortable. I intend to do this in future.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/21 07:22 AM
30

YEP. Family friend in his 20s hitting on my FIFTEEN YEAR OLD SELF had this exact loser energy. Sadly I was a little damaged, vulnerable and naive. We owe this to the girls in their teens to make it known that these guys are sick losers who can't get a woman their own age.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/21 11:07 PM
15

I love her quote "when a woman is hungry, put food in her mouth, not a cock".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/21 10:59 PM
2

They're too busy teaching us how to NOT get pregnant when we are young that they completely miss out any education about fertility and general reproductive health, so we're left to get it from magazines, gossip, the internet and old wives' tales. It's an absolute disgrace if you ask me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/21 03:32 PM
75

I know of two different women who married old scrotes who had already had vasectomies that they tried to reverse. Needless to say they both went through years of ivf and ended up with nothing to show for it - years of fertility drugs, invasive procedures, self injection - and what did these old bastards have to do after they had their ickle operation all numbed up so it didn't hurty-hurt deir ickle winkies?? Had a wank in a cup every so often. One of these women would have made an amazing mother…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 09:52 PM
1

Oh here we fucking go...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 04:55 AM
9

Thatcher had a chemistry degree and invented soft serve ice cream.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 06:24 PM
31

I've seen it work with 3 men who are all involved with each other, but then again there are many things about male gay relationships that I don't get (I am a bi woman so I have more insight into f/f relationships but I've never seen a long term f/f/f one).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 06:19 PM
17

My sister is single, works a stupid number of hours and is literally in the top income tax bracket in the UK, but still was beating herself up about having spent money on some fancy picnic things from an expensive food hall in London (they're really nice though- they have a cheeseboard and a condiment pouch!). I told her to treat herself since she has plenty of savings, she owns her property, she has no kids- why the hell shouldn't she buy nice things that she likes?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 06:14 PM
25

The idea of a safe word is trash to me. If you are engaging in sexual activity where you can't guarantee that your consent and its withdrawal will be understood and complied with, then for fuck's sake DO NOT ENGAGE IN THAT ACTIVITY! It's such a red flag! If you need a specific word to tell your partner to stop because "stop" isn't going to do it then you need to work out why he thinks that is an OK scenario for a sexual encounter. Is he porn sick and has learnt the wrong things? Does he have rea…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 12:36 PM
2

I'm sorry I don't get your train of thought here. I'm in political lobbying and everything is about favours and relationships. He's already written me a professional recommendation for another job because (unfortunately) our boss is in trouble with his party and we're all getting out while we can - he left last week and our other colleague leaves in a few weeks. I'm planning to leave at the end of my contract in the summer and he's been sending me job ads and contacts in the industry. We've all …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 06:12 PM
2

Professional shared interest? Our industry is very much based on who you know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 07:18 PM
67

I think the amount of alcohol has generally been the problem
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 09:18 PM
63

I try to give compliments to women that I see around rather than just think them, but make them very specific and non creepy. For example "I love your hair, it really suits you" or something similar. I also try and give professional compliments after I got an email from someone after giving a presentation in a meeting (that my boss should have given but he left early) , saying what a great job I'd done and how thorough it was. I think giving each other compliments is really important - to be hon…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 09:15 PM
1

My friend in my office calls me dude. He's 24 to my 35. We send each other memes and make stupid Harry Potter jokes. He's a nice lad and we'll meet up for drinks when he leaves (my bf knows all about this, totally gets the dynamic and thinks it's a good idea). Nothing sexual or romantic going on there though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 08:39 PM
1

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 08:31 PM
55

More money than sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 08:12 PM
1

I've made this comment before on here, but it bears repeating since it was discussed on the podcast: if anyone is going to die from lack of sex it is women. There have been studies done on Catholic nuns that indicate that a lack of child bearing increases the incidence of certain feminine cancers (breasts, ovaries, womb - obviously cervical cancer risk is increased by HPV) These nuns were from different communities around the world and the only thing they had medically in common was being women …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 02:58 PM
4

I'm great, I just think addicts need to own their shit as much as anyone else. I lived with an addict for ten years and he would bitch and moan about how it wasn't his fault instead of working out how to stay away from alcohol, tobacco, gambling, risky sex, drugs, violence and everything else he was addicted to, which hurt me. Babyminding people saying "oh there there, you're a poor addict, it's not your fault" is bullshit. Get in a program, sort your health and your head out and stop making you…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 04:51 PM
-14

So is herpes, what's your point?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 01:00 PM
-8

I highly doubt anyone held him down and forced the coke up Matthew Perry's nose.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 11:26 AM
3

Humour and intelligence is important to me. I spent ten years with a pretty good looking man who was just... Boring. Never wanted to discuss ideas, go to cultural activities like galleries, museums or plays, only ever wanted to sit in a pub and drink beer. Not for me any more thank you! Only men who can engage in higher discourse need apply!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 05:24 PM
6

It's two different sets of muscles - you need to do pushing and sucking in. It's easier to do it in a squat.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 06:49 PM
21

On what would have been my 11th wedding anniversary last month (coming up for my 1 year anniversary of leaving the bastard) I took myself shopping, spent £175 in Harvey Nichols on luxury skincare, treated myself to sushi and cannoli and watched a romcom. It was the best wedding anniversary I've ever had! 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 06:28 PM
6

Former army wife here - can 100% confirm.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 05:46 PM
13

I am the opposite - I used to not wear makeup, especially bold lipstick or eyeshadow because my ex husband used to give me a load of stick about it. Essentially he was projecting his own shitty behaviour on to me. Now I wear makeup for my own satisfaction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 05:41 PM
4

Who was also a shitty scrote who sexually abused her teenage stepdaughter, fwiw...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 05:35 PM
50

So my ex husband had shit tier opinions on many things, but there was one thing that he was 100% correct on, and that is the concept of "girly fat", which is (in my opinion) infinitely worse than a dad bod. Men who have never done any arduous physical activity with weight tend to have a weird fat distribution around their legs and hips, soft jawlines, sloping shoulders and are generally doughy and unattractive. My genuinely lovely boyfriend previously had this exact problem - he wasn't fat but t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 09:07 PM
102

I have ditched a lot of ideas and mindsets that focused on being a "cool girl". For example, when I lived with my ex husband, lots of things in our home were very masculine or neutral style. Now my house is my own I have a lot of (tasteful) pink with no shame. I'm much better at articulating my sexual needs - so right now I'm very stressed at work and finding it difficult to orgasm and I'm not feeling a need to fake it or flatter anyone's ego. I'm also having no shame about just cutting off cont…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 05:51 PM
12

Add to that ability to dress appropriate to the occasion regardless of income level. Do you need to tell him that he needs a suit for a wedding/funeral? Does his mom still buy his underwear? Does he only buy clothes at the supermarket? Income level shouldn't matter since you can get perfectly good cheaper basics or spending some time in thrift stores or on ebay etc for quality second hand clothing is not an unreasonable ask.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 09:14 PM
19

My ex husband hit me around the head once when he didn't have clean underwear. This was all because when I didn't work I wanted to "earn my keep" so agreed to do all the housework, but oh guess what when I got a paid job the housework was still my responsibility, as it was when I had a baby and went back to work. Its a slippery slope - let him take care of himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 09:48 PM
31

I think at the time there was lot of visibility of orphaned Asian children because of Vietnam. I think as a wealthy celebrity possibly adopting from overseas could have been seen as an easier option because if she'd, say, adopted an abandoned child in the US their scummy family members would come out of the woodwork for a handout. You see this happening now with global media- how many cases have there been where a child is in an orphanage and their family don't give a shit until a celebrity want…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 06:42 AM
624

Oh no, how sad. Maybe he should sell his ass to pay for repairs?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 07:06 PM
23

I wish I had some friends in their early 20's to set up. A guy I work with is sweet, kind, intelligent, funny, well paid, quite sophisticated, but apparently can't find a girlfriend (his last one went back to her home country when her visa ran out). I have a nice boyfriend of my own and he's much too young for me anyway! I think we need to go back to more setups - let's outsource some of that screening process ladies! My colleague for example might be able to hide being a douchebag from dates, b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 07:02 PM
71

I've just met an asian (Chinese) woman in a professional context, and before I met her literally everyone via work was "don't trust her", "she only cares about herself". Turns out she is just as uninterested in people's random drama as I am- she's a small business owner and she's still been putting in hours of help for me and others but I genuinely think there has been racism and sexism towards her for simply defining their boundaries. I'm white but I have definitely experienced the sexism from …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 06:55 PM
3

I am, thank you so much! Great healthy relationship with a lovely kind and handsome man, levelling up my career and working on professional self esteem so I am as good at not taking crap in the workplace as I am now in my personal life!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/21 07:19 PM
6

I agree, it took me until finding this sub at the age of 35 to realise that was exactly what had happened to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/21 06:43 PM
9

Damaged girls "like" bad boys because they have trauma bonded with a man who treated her badly. I've never met a mentally healthy woman yet who complained about her partner being too kind, too generous, too considerate etc. What kind of a man goes out of his way to find a woman damaged enough to accept that "bad boy" behaviour? Scum, that's what kind.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/21 06:28 PM
8

I love the no competition element of FDS. It's so pleasantly the reverse of that toxic crap. We're actually pleased for each other if one of us finds a HVM. This is why so many men die alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/21 06:25 PM
4

The ones who are faking it won't be able to keep up being a HVM long term, that's why screening is so important. LVM will always look for the shortcut to getting laid.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/21 06:23 PM
6

Jesus I needed to hear this right now. I might keep for my vision board.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/21 06:13 PM
36

I am standing for city council and my boyfriend (who does not belong to my party) came out flyering with me for 6 hours last weekend (in time when we would usually be having a date) and spent hours creating shape files for google maps of my voting district so I can mark where I've canvassed. High value behaviour is about what is important to you - any idiot can buy flowers and pay for dates. My ex husband insisted on paying for dinner and had flowers sent to my office but he would have never tho…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/21 04:32 PM
3

Return "no thanks" message was perfectly polite and not at all personally insulting - what the hell gives him the right to go off like that?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/21 04:25 PM
18

I think depending on the age of the child, sometimes that is a tactic to keep them in one place. Also handrails etc aren't always in reach of kids if they're standing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 11:42 PM
52

When I was pregnant I went to London to visit relatives and they give you a special badge for public transport so that people know you're pregnant and not just a pie fiend. I remember being on a full but not packed tube and there were several guys who saw the badge but studiously avoided my gaze but one guy with his wife stood up and said "would you like to sit down?" as soon as he clocked me. His wife gave me a look as if to say "yes indeed, I have a decent one". Contrast that with a time in a …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 11:02 PM
65

Plus I would like to go to the gym and enjoy a sauna, without dudes fucking in it, because you know they will.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 12:20 AM
33

Haha I must admit, I look, but I'm training to be a volunteer breastfeeding peer supporter and a part of me notices a feeding mama out of the corner of my eye and the super keen breastfeeding enthusiast in me is like "YAY! Public feeding!! I wonder if her latch is ok... Do you think she needs a drink of water?... Perhaps she will come to our breastfeeding group!!" I try not to be obvious about it though.....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 11:54 PM
55

Well I can't speak for anyone else but I have more money in my bank account since getting divorced than I've ever had before, and that's even after thousands in lawyers fees. Basically I'm not feeding and being forced to enable the drinking habits of a giant man child while he runs the tumble drier for 2 shirts because I refused to wash, dry and iron them. I've managed to also get a job that's paying higher than I ever had before, because now that he's demanding 50/50 custody to avoid paying chi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 11:58 PM
12

This is assault. Report that shit to the police.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 09:45 PM
65

"Sorry" is mine. My boyfriend is forever telling me off for apologising to him because I got so used to apologising to a LVM for his failings. Sure, apologise if you actually did something wrong, but saying sorry because his coffee went cold, or you're on your period, or the kids are being ratty (i.e. shit that is not your fault) is a bizarre and stupid habit that I'm trying really hard to train myself out of!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 07:42 PM
43

Honestly, so much this. For ten years I was married to a man who used to use the disgusting phrase "you should be sucking my cock over this". "This" being doing a normal thing, like parenting his own child, doing basic repairs to our shared home, putting some air in my car tyres. My boyfriend in contrast shrugs off going out of his way to help me like it's nothing. He came to my home today while I was WFH because I had a busy day and didn't have time to meet him for lunch, but my phone kept goin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 07:37 PM
60

Once I found my ex-husband's cheating tinder profile and catfished him with some pics of an old college acquaintance that she had on her public facebook (so not exactly raiding her private albums). Basically arranged a date with him and stood him up at a bar while I was sat home with our baby. Was tempted to turn up and have it out with him but decided his self-righteous anger was too funny. A lot of "how dare you waste my time you bitch". Fucking loser. I'm so well shot of the asshole.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 12:05 AM
21

For real though this is literature and we should study it in high school.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 02:53 PM
3

That's what I mean about even the men in the family having good hearts. Even Gus basically cares about his daughter and wants her to be happy - it's just a slightly warped patriarchal version of that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 07:57 PM
14

I mean, lots of people get bath products or candles as gifts and never get round to using them so it may cost even less than that. I think the big investment is the time that you are devoting to yourself with no other distractions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 12:18 PM
24

I think the overall message is the right one - no matter where you sit on conventional beauty standards, make the best of yourself in every aspect and you deserve fulfilment in every part of your life. Of course it won't be perfect but it's a darn sight better than these romcoms where some impossibly hot woman falls for Seth Rogan despite him behaving like an appalling stoner teenager because she wore glasses in high school and enjoys reading.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 02:41 AM
11

Watched MBFGW on Saturday and My Life In Ruins on the Sunday! Poopi was pretty hot, I recall.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 02:35 AM
65

He is like a toast!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 12:29 AM
79

I just read that Rebel Wilson as part of her new health kick treats herself to a bubble bath rather than food or alcohol now. I think that's a great idea.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 12:21 AM
68

Apart from the fact that men swipe right on everyone as OLD is merely a means to finding casual sex for most men, not a meaningful relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 08:35 AM
18

Your sexual attraction is inherent, but you can certainly make choices about your partners, otherwise why are we all here? I honestly don't see it as anyone's business who people date or why, as long as they aren't hurting the other person in their relationship with their actions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 11:27 PM
3

Sorry, that's a bit of an army word I think. Stacked? Very muscular, but big with it. Does that help? Sorry my slang can be a bit weird sometimes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/21 07:53 PM
15

I had been feeling slightly guilty that my boyfriend's increased exercise regimen might be to do with the fact that the majority of my exes were frankly hench. I do have a "type", which until now has been 6'2"+ (I am 5'1" so get dirty looks off tall girls quite a lot), big and muscular, and basically a bit thick. I have an IQ of 154 so I've basically thought I'm not going to find anyone who matches me intellectually so I'll go for one that's stupid but at least pretty. Poor adorable boyfriend th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/21 09:51 PM
29

I honestly think he's a victim of grooming. That woman has no self respect for pursuing a student. If they had met while he had been an adult I would say good for her (as I do for say Joan Collins and her husband, or the late Barbara Windsor), but I think she has no morals.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 11:20 PM
9

Brilliant. This is so good, I'm really happy for you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/21 09:19 PM
198

"I need to know if she's been abused"? Errrrrr...... Yes she has. She might not know it, or even suspect it, but she has. Even if they don't have a physical relationship (which I highly doubt), mentally what she will have experienced is exploitative and damaging. I'm not even being judgey- I've been there and done it. An older family friend groomed me at age 15 and it ruined my early adult life. There's no way I would have thought that love was an abusive relationship without his screwing up of …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/21 08:22 AM
6

Just listen to New Rules by Dua Lipa on repeat instead. A bop and FDS compliant!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/21 11:42 PM
4

Coffee and a walk is pretty much all you can do legally in the UK at the moment sadly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/21 11:39 PM
2

I needed to hear this 5 years ago though :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/21 11:32 PM
2

Ugh, I remember being 16 years old with a 24 year old "boyfriend" abuser. Guys who "wait till she's legal" should be strung up with the rest of the paedophiles IMO.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/21 11:13 PM
16

The problem with the acceptability of "sex work" (yuck) is that men genuinely believe that there ought to be a straight exchange of economic power for sexual consent. This is the problem with the r£d p!ll, and with the seemingly increasingly prevalent rape defence of "sorry m'lud I thought she was a prostitute". Men will believe that the simple act of their demand will materialise supply, and due to trafficking it inevitably does. This is why the nordic/demand model is so important for keeping A…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/21 02:40 PM
18

This is so true. I actually took my uncle to task over this exact thing. He has borderline personality disorder and really treated my auntie badly towards the end of their marriage and throughout their divorce. He called my house looking for my mother (while I was still living at home) and got me and I told him in no uncertain terms that he needed to own his shit. He can have mental health issues and a shitty childhood, but that does not give him permission to take it out on other people or to n…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/21 09:25 PM
9

Ha, yes, my ex is pond scum, I am well shot of him. The point is that we shouldn't have to have our immediate healthcare needs as young, fertile women downgraded to a secondary concern because there is a pandemic which is most likely to be fatal to people over the national average life expectancy. There are young women who will die because they had to skip their pap smear. In the UK there have been dozens of women killed this year because of domestic violence increases with lockdown. Our health …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/21 12:10 AM
34

My implant is due for replacement any day now and I called up the sexual health clinic to book to replace it. Attitude of the woman on the phone was "LOL no, cannot do healthcare because we need To Keep Everyone SafeTM". So now I've been told that I have to suck it up and wait (unspecified) months until they can be bothered with my healthcare again, and nobody can tell me the pregnancy risk of an out of date contraceptive implant. The only answer I can get is "a small chance". WTF is small? 1%? …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/21 04:30 PM
3

I saw something about Princess Diana's massive aquamarine ring that she bought for herself after her divorce and I want to get something similar. I've seen some lovely morganite on etsy. My ex husband spent £15000 on diamonds and I don't even have my original engagement ring that was bought second hand for £300 (discount for paying cash, negotiated by me!). Fuck him, I'm buying my own.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 12:41 AM
22

Well studies have shown that nuns are more likely to suffer from breast and uterine cancers which is thought to be due to them not having children, so if anyone is going to die from a lack of sex it's women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 12:32 AM
7

Well fuck this is hilarious, I'm in!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 12:30 AM
1

No I saw it as I they were all coming back up the road eating ice creams.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 03:06 PM
22

Oh dear, how sad, never mind.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 10:25 AM
11

I completely agree with this. I had a pregnancy scare a few months ago following marital rape. I could not bear the thought of having another one of his kids, but I was also not sure if I would be able to live with the guilt of an abortion, and that to me was highly upsetting. In any case an abortion would not have un-raped me. Thankfully it was just a scare and my symptoms were reactions to medication, but I can empathise with the need for it, I just think it needs to centre women's need, not m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/20 07:51 AM
-16

I'm unashamedly pro life, but I believe we should try for the most compassionate outcome in any circumstance (so I think it should be available as a last resort). I have had more wokebro scrotes mansplain about women's rights though than spoken to genuine pro life men who want to remove them. There may be some men who want a barefoot and pregnant wife but I've never met one. The majority of pro life men in my experience are high value, and thus value life accordingly. They are in committed relat…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 11:59 PM
3

Or just because they need new narcissistic supply and children deprived of a parent are easy meat.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 10:45 PM
2

I should say though, current man is only current man because he absolutely does not do this. I quite often ask his opinion on things and he is great at appreciating when I have a good idea, but also when he has advice for me he phrases it in a way that somehow is just very nurturing, positive and supportive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:44 PM
3

Haha my ex's ballbag of a friend used to get so wound up at me, because he didn't like the fact that I, as a lowly paid charity worker, was actually cleverer than him, an investment banker who takes home millions. He cannot say the word "nuclear". He pronounces it "nucular". When I laughed and corrected him he doubled down and told me it was I who was wrong! 😂 Money can't buy brain cells buddy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:40 PM
1

Also, most malls or large department stores can offer this service or at least recommend stylists, or you can search hashtags on insta like #stylist #personalshopper and your city name.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:35 PM
1

I've said this before, but invest in yourself and your appearance and get a stylist/personal shopper session. I paid about £250 GBP (on a promotion) and I got basically a style that I could use to shop for myself and always look put together, even on a budget. My stylist sent me a questionnaire about what I wanted a wardrobe for (I was starting a new job and had lost a lot of weight so needed everything bar shoes and a coat really. I needed clothes that I could wear to the office but also to a w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:33 PM
24

Why are we keeping this piece of shit anonymous? If you're going to post that stuff on a public hookup app you've got no expectation of privacy. Name and shame.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:21 PM
16

My shit head ex thinks that financial abortions should be a thing. This is the bloke who is trying to get me to agree to 50/50 custody because after 5 years of not giving a shiny shit his son is apparently the centre of his universe. The moral hazard of this shit being available is just too much. I think one of the most effective things to improve make behaviour in the last 20-30 years is the Me Too movement - the fact that men are starting to belive they are at risk of false rape allegations fr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/20 09:19 PM
20

I certainly think casually getting to know each other couldn't do any harm if you think that he's making a genuine commitment to self improvement (and he's not going to do that ugly duckling thing of getting full of himself as soon as he becomes more attractive).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/20 09:05 PM
12

And then a few minutes later wants "cuddles". They do it just to fuck with your head.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 02:15 PM
8

The only things left are a few boxes of books and a couple of pictures. I made sure to take my documents. I packed them up in a lockable file box a few weeks ago so they were ready to grab.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 11:00 AM
7

I'm aware of this. I think I've done this before but really there's nothing he could say that would make me go back. I've tried asking him to leave before but he manipulated his way back in. This was the only option. It helps that I have a decent job, a company car (that he has no claim on), somewhere to go and a family who will support me because they all think he's an asshole. I've got options. His life is going to suck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 10:05 AM
14

Great video, thanks for sharing. I can see he's already doing this stuff and I can also see "giving him what he wants" is not going to work, because what he wants is ultimately control.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 06:50 AM
12

I went to a lawyer a year ago but chickened out. I meant to do this slowly in a very planned way but I just got pushed too far this weekend.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 06:39 AM
35

I tend to agree. I would be inclined to not be a dick about access but he's not thinking of his best interests here. He didn't give two shits about his son for the last 5 years - if I've been away for a weekend or something I've come home and the boy has been in the same clothes as when I left, teeth not brushed, eaten potato chips and maybe McDonald's or pizza and just watched cartoons all day. He's a shockingly bad parent.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 06:38 AM
5

I was always taught "Hay is for horses, people say 'excuse me'"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 06:12 AM
12

In Germany everyone is Frau. They only use Fraulein for little girls, like how we would use "master" for little boys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 01:23 PM
54

49? Better be some Matt Bomer looking millionaire with a great personality cos that is a looooooooong shot my dude!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 06:38 AM
41

Great job! I'm also in the process of leaving a narcissist - thanks for pointing out that sub. Good luck with your studies!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 06:37 AM
58

When my divorce comes through I'm changing my name. My birth name is anglicised Eastern European, and it's a bit weird so I'm not going back to that as ordering pizzas and taxis has been much easier in my married name. I'm going to use my grandmother's maiden name, which is quite simple to spell, but also is a fresh start. My grandmother is very inspiring to me, as she emigrated from Ireland after being widowed, stood up to her in laws that tried to take her husband's business from her and made …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 06:35 AM
8

I think it's important to differentiate "slap and tickle" from what is currently accepted as the boundaries of bdsm. A light spanking on the buttocks or being tied to the bed with the cord from your dressing gown from a partner who treats you well and whom you have romantic, consensual sex with, is different from a casual partner who enacts porn scenes either without your consent or with your heavily coerced consent or less than enthusiastic response. Anything where specific "equipment" is neede…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/20 07:35 AM
27

Dude on the left being fat shows a lack of respect for you and for himself. He shouldn't be on dating websites until he has improved himself and learned self control. If he's a slob when he's trying to impress you, imagine the mess he'll be when he's comfortable. Yes, I'm body shaming. No, I don't care.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 11:03 PM
36

I would also like to add "bran-tubbing", the act of placing a hand inside a woman's clothing without any skill, finesse or consideration, having a bit of a grope around and considering that foreplay. From when you have a bran tub/lucky dip at the fair and you have to rummage around for the prizes. _"Ugh, as if I'd want sex with him after he just bran - tubbed me and then assumed I'd be good to go".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/04/20 02:03 PM
1

Charming.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/20 10:50 PM
32

A) who is he?, and B) tabloids are disgusting, I hope they all go broke.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/20 07:52 AM
2

Opposite happened to me. I wanted a small legal ceremony, no big white dress. Husband insisted on getting married in a famous cathedral with dozens of guests that he knew my family would insist on paying for. I was called selfish for not wanting to give him his "dream wedding" so he could impress his friends. I should have seen it for the red flag it was instead of capitulating and doing something very uncomfortable and costly for me in order to keep the peace.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/20 01:02 PM
17

I really hate reading, except for non fiction. I prefer speech radio, podcasts, documentaries etc. I'm an auditory learner and I also have mild add. My stbx husband reads constantly, and ignores other responsibilities like parenting and chores in order to read. I don't think reading in and of itself affects either of our values. I would rather be with a man with a range of interests than an avid reader who will be antisocial in order to go back to his book.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/20 04:21 PM
4

I would like to see a war on skirting the boundaries of legality - older men grooming young girls but waiting for sex until they're "legal". It's still predatory and if the grooming begins before the age of consent it should still be considered as abuse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/20 10:51 PM
24

Go with your gut always. There are plenty more fish in the sea. If something doesn't sit right with you then just unmatch and move along.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/20 11:40 AM
5

I mean, I know a lot of people who don't wear clothes at home. If he puts pants on if people come round what is the issue? He's not hurting anyone of he lives alone. Has he asked you to do anything that you feel uncomfortable with? It's a bit weird telling you up front, but maybe he doesn't want to waste his time with someone who would be uncomfortable with that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/20 11:28 AM
15

That won't stop financial abuse. I had several thousand in savings that my stbx husband emotionally manipulated me into handing over because I thought of I did that he wouldn't cheat on me/leave me. Silly old me should have cut and run way before that point!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/20 11:54 PM
15

Hmm, first they remove most British women's copinh strategy for menstruation by fucking up the Dairy Milk recipe, now they out and out promote exploitation. That's done it - switching to Galaxy permanently!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/20 11:30 PM
5

They also have an uncanny ability to close open questions, e.g. Person: So what did you do at the office today? Narc: Work.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/20 12:08 PM
17

I bet an enterprising young lady could make a lot of money by doing background checks on potential partners of cash rich but time poor and tech dumb women. I think of all those middle aged numpties that send their online boyfriend their life savings because he's said he's stuck in an Afghan jail on a special ops mission when really he's a Nigerian scammers in an Internet cafe. Or maybe I've just been watching too much Dirty John...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/20 12:01 PM
113

If he's sending that to someone that he's never put any effort into developing any form of trust with, then he has no expectation of privacy, so bollocks to him frankly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/20 11:51 AM
2

I thought I did but I'm on mobile. I'll edit it once I get access to a computer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/20 07:31 AM
4

It means "Bye".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/20 09:49 AM
29

Just stare dead at them with a look that says they've just told you they skullfuck dead puppies. Make sure the look is a combination of confused and disgusted. It's important that they get social feedback that underlines the fact that it's not only unwanted, it's downright odd. If they get neutral or even slightly positive feedback you'll only encourage them. Ditto any snappy remarks. They should not derive any pleasure from the encounter at all. Make them feel as uncomfortable as they make you …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/02/20 06:33 PM
4

Literally dated someone with a micropenis and I've never got so much oral in my life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 07:31 PM
1

Yes I have. We weren't compatible for other reasons but he was a decent guy that I wouldn't dissuade my girlfriends from dating to be honest. I've never said anything unpleasant about him to anyone because I think he's just a really good guy, but not for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 07:31 PM
32

Oh sorry, excuse us for wanting lasting and meaningful relationships with someone worthy of our time and effort! We're not trying to fool anyone or trick men into things, we just want relationships where we're appropriately valued! I honestly don't know why they get so upset. There are plenty of pickmeishas who will gladly become your bangmaids (unfortunately).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 12:45 PM
9

I don't think it is necessarily. It all depends on his family background and what he's willing to provide. Wanting a big family can just be a representation of his values, and if you don't share those you need to find someone else.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 07:45 AM
3

As long as you are happy and fulfilled, that's the main thing. I do hope you have things in your life that fulfil you though, whether that be career, travel, community work etc. I think everyone should have at least *something * that they "leave behind" but it doesn't have to be kids.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/20 11:36 PM
6

I'm selling them off to pay off some debt. They used to really upset me because of what they represented but now that I don't love him any more and I'm trying to divorce him I no longer care.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/20 11:22 PM
44

I think it's a general lvm observation. My husband bought me a second hand engagement ring that I chose myself for £250 (I haggled the price down myself as well) and had to be begged to go and collect so he would have done kind of involvement in the process, and then 6 months later spent £3000 on warhammer figurines.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/20 05:44 PM
25

Yes! Everybody just shut the lid and stop spraying your bodily fluids all over the bathroom every time you flush! Fuck's sake men are disgusting creatures sometimes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/20 11:34 PM
2

Long acting reversible contraception (iud or implant) is considered to be as effective as getting your tubes tied but it's not as invasive and as the name suggests, reversible if for any reason you do change your mind. I'm not saying that you don't feel as you do or that's not valid, but I think it's also healthy to hear that if you change your mind at all that's not being a hypocrite, or letting other people say "I told you so".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/20 02:45 PM
111

The difference between FDS and TRP is that women aren't seeking an ever expanding group of people from a static age group to be sexual partners on an unfair footing. It's inconceivable to even be competing for hvm, because if he's not interested in you he's not interested. You're not spending your time chasing men who aren't coming to you proactively and demonstrating their value to you. If you aren't having men approach you then you change something until a hvm worth your time and effort does. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/20 09:20 PM
0

They could, but let's be realistic here, they're not.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/20 07:54 AM
3

If you have a hvm this week be great. Someone to help you with everything. If you had a baby with a lvm like I had the misfortune to do you will simply be running round after two babies. My husband had post operational tour leave after I had my baby so was just hanging round the house, complaining about the baby crying, pestering me for sex before I was ready, playing video games and expecting to be constantly fed and having his clothes laid out for him every day. In an ideal world we'd all only…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/20 11:07 PM
92

I am suspicious of the high number of "buy one gift, get another gift free" that a lot of shops are doing. The Perfume Shop and also Pandora have been doing that. Who honestly wants to receive two bottles of perfume? Pandora are a bit more clever - free earrings when you spend x amount. If you got the free earrings he's on the level, if you didn't then you need to dump the cheating bastard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/20 10:47 PM
33

Narcissists don't necessarily dump people in my experience. They just keep them hanging around in order that they can't just move on and be happy. My husband has been a grade a twat to me (literally if I listed it all you wouldn't believe me) but every time I've tried to end things he's talked me out of it. I know he manipulates situations and he will use everything from the house to the kid to his mental health so that I don't leave him. Narcissists are essentially insecure and that's why they …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/20 10:41 PM
15

Him: "when will dinner be ready" Me : "about ten minutes" Him: "cool what can I have for a snack?" How about ten minutes of self discipline you ungrateful shithead?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/20 10:26 PM
236

Gone Girl gave me a lot of insight into my own situation. I rooted for that glorious bitch the whole way through.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/20 11:07 PM
51

That I was "on the shelf" at 26, when actually it was about the best I've ever looked and I have a great personality and intellect. Sadly I also had cripplingly low self esteem thanks to all the negging so I didn't realise this was bullshit at the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 07:43 AM
11

I really like inside joke gifts. Just don't get him anything wifey like clothing or toiletries. Also I would stay away from overtly romantic gifts like big Teddy bears (unless that's also part of the inside joke) or turning yourself into the gift by giving him personal photos etc. If he wants (clothed) photos of you he needs to make sure he takes them (everyone has a phone now, no excuse) or he needs to ask you for them. Any risqué photos I think need a significant commitment to make sure he tak…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/20 11:15 PM
247

This happened to me when I was 16/17. Family friend who had known me since the age of 13 (and who obviously knew I had a schoolgirl crush on him) presented himself to my family as a big brother/protector. Someone to be trusted. He cornered me at the age of 15 and told me to wait until I was "legal" and that he was going to be "my first". Which then obviously happened. Used and abused me until I was 21 and able to get away from him. Not said two words to him in over 10 years now, despite the fact…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/20 10:15 PM
15

When I was about 18 I had a really amazing music teacher who coached us for performances. One of the most valuable pieces of advice for confidence that she gave me is that if someone gives you a compliment, you can just say "thank you." You don't have to return it, or be self-deprecating, literally just say thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/20 06:57 PM
7

I'm learning Arabic and trying to sort out my house.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/20 01:30 PM
32

Ten years of "marriage" (aka being legally and financially tied, and not a lot else to show for it) to an army officer and this is pretty much my experience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/20 12:03 PM
61

The most romantic thing a man has ever done for me is the Christmas present I got this year. We agreed to get "joke" presents (low cost but meaningful). I got him a scrabble board game because we like to play. He remembered a conversation we had months before where I was taking about an old TV show we used to watch that had a quiz where you could win a coffee mug. I said I always wished I'd won one. He knows some people in TV so he pulled in some favours. Unfortunately the coffee mugs no longer …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/20 12:32 AM
5

Wife me now! /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/20 12:59 PM
11

I assume men with thirsty selfies are gay and looking to attract men. A vacation pic where he happens to have his shirt off I don't think it's count, but standing in front of the mirror taking selfies of your average body is not a think that attracts women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/20 12:58 PM
4

Whatever, Dan. Whatever. Next!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/20 12:54 PM
4

I have orgasmed before from being stroked, through clothes, about an inch in from my hip bone. Takes a while though and a very gentle touch so few men can be bothered with the effort, which is disappointing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/20 12:53 PM
3

If you have to ask, it's a no. You felt uncomfortable with this to ask us about it so you clearly are not happy with that behaviour. Walk away with your head held high.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/20 09:10 PM
2

I keep reminding myself of my A+ fertility. I'm on an implant now but when I'm not on bc you can set your watch by my periods, and the first time I had unprotected sex (age 29) I got pregnant straight away - no complications (if you don't count the mental trauma of being married to a fuckwit), perfectly healthy baby. My mom had 3 kids within 4 years and got pregnant at the drop of a hat, my grandmother had her first baby at 40 and her second at 45 - no complications, no fertility treatments, my …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/20 09:08 PM
3

My stbx calls me in the middle of a work day to ask when our son's school holidays are. The school has an app with a calendar that he can easily download, but cannot be bothered.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/20 12:20 PM
32

My son had rotavirus when he was a baby, which he then gave to me. He was 3 months old so still exclusively breast fed. I was having to feed him whilst both he and I were being sick. And rushing to the bathroom/changing nappies. I couldn't keep anything down. I was exhausted. I said to my husband "I literally don't think I've ever been more dehydrated - I need a drink". His response was "yeah... I'm pretty thirsty to be honest - can you get me a pint of juice if you're going to the kitchen?". St…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/20 02:06 PM
1

I've actually just been reading that thread! Lots of very useful stuff. I may do a post soon. Everyone is very kind and supportive from what I've seen, so there may be something I haven't thought of yet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/20 12:16 AM
3

This is just it, I haven't yet got out. I am trying to get my ducks in a row to do it. This sub helps enormously, but I'm still working my way up to it. It always seems to be the wrong time - it was christmas, then I started a new job, then it was his birthday, then it's my kid's birthday... I'm hoping in the spring I can just say "OK, this is it now. I know I have to do it - he's a net drain on my life and I deserve so much better - but that doesn't make it less hard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 11:40 PM
3

With me it was every meal. I would make food, deliver it to the back bedroom where he had his computer. Sometimes I would take the empty plate, then go back downstairs and watch tv. What upsets me now is when I look back on myself then and how much time I wasted. I was so beautiful, and he should have been taking every opportunity to be out having fun with an attractive and clever wife. In reality he has no personality so he doesn't know what to do apart from go to a bar and drink. He made it ve…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 11:30 PM
16

And mine!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 11:19 PM
3

Being reminded of it is reminding me of the years of shit I've put up with and the reasons why I shouldn't feel bad about ending it. I've learned that's not something I have to accept.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 11:13 PM
17

I had this stupid idea in my head that I wanted to get married at 24, so I got married at 24 to the first person who basically gave me the time of day. Ten years later I am working out how to get out of it with my dignity and sanity intact. Why did I want to get married at 24? Because I believed the bullshit about the wall (my shithead husband managed to convince me I was washed up at 26). Nobody would want me after 25. I needed to have a baby before I was 30. In reality my grandmother had her s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 10:31 PM
5

My husband used to do this. It's soul destroying.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 10:26 PM
6

I have now, but it's years since I've used reddit so I'm still getting to grips with it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 10:13 PM
43

Reddit needs to sort their fucking algorithms out because I did not join this sub as some kind of means to create or join a harem, and frankly having been dragged into "swinging" (vomit vomit vomit) by my sexually coercive soon to be ex I wouldn't want to go near polyamory in a month of sundays. I'd just like to have reciprocally emotionally and physically fulfilling sex with one man worth spending my non-sexual time with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 09:53 PM
2

This must be relatively new then because I was only offered the T shape or r shape plastic coils, or the T shape copper coil. I'm just saying what the gyno told me. Ended up with an implant anyway, so no harm done.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 01:00 PM
110

So he doesn't have a phone capable of taking selfies? Noted. If his ex took all his photos you can guarantee he's the kind of man who is looking for a new mommy to take care of him. Swerve and a miss!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 11:35 AM
9

A lot of teens have a uterus that's actually too small for an iud. It's more suitable for women who have had children already. If your uterus is too small it can cause a lot of discomfort. I was measured for one at 24 but my womb was 0.5 cm too small and just being measured for it caused me to faint and convulse as I have a hyper - sensitive cervix
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 07:02 AM
4

I've always felt that was a very invasive option. I have nexplanon which is supposed to be as effective as getting your tubes tied but it's done so easily. I guess if you're sure long term though and you don't want hormonal it's a good option. Do you still get periods if you don't mind me asking?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 06:58 AM
185

I wouldn't have mentioned the number of dates tbh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 06:44 AM
3

I am trying to position myself to get divorced, so I have some thoughts about this. The main reason for me not getting divorced yet is a financial one. Part of the abuse of my marriage is that my husband has pretty much sucked any financial independence from me. I had some inheritance which he considered to be "our" money, but his money is entirely his. I have debts from taking care of his expenses. I have poured so much money into my house (not to mention time and effort on maintaining it and d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/20 10:08 PM
35

It helps to reverse the negative conditioning that you get from LVM, especially narcissistic abusive redpill types that smash you down so that you'll stay with them putting up with their crap because you think you're washed up and nobody will want you (I speak from experience!).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/20 09:51 PM
19

One of my biggest regrets is letting my husband back into my life after the first time I dumped him. He texted me out of the blue a year after I sent him a text telling him to "fuck off and die" over his horrible behaviour and he just started lovebombing me. If you don't think they're worth it now just block them - you couldn't really do that 12 years ago, now you never have to hear from them again if you don't want to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/20 08:07 AM
16

Plan your time when he's in town. Make arrangements to see (or at least call) friends, buy tickets to something you can't duck out on. As a last resort don't shave your legs or do anything to your bikini area so you won't be "ready" for anything to happen.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/20 12:55 AM
20

Get hobbies! And no, you're not going to meet the type of man you want by going to that quilting class at the community college. Sign up for any kind of social event where the type of men you want to meet are likely to go. If you want someone sporty, maybe try a park run or circuits class at the gym. If you want someone artsy look for events on at local galleries or theatres. If it's important to you that a man is in your career field then look for networking events in your industry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/20 12:50 AM
6

The man I will soon be divorcing is physically more attractive and makes (slightly) more money than the man with whom my future lies (although that wall is creeping up on him). The problem is that I have never in 12 years of a relationship been able to sustain a fun or interesting conversation without it a) becoming argumentative or b) becoming boring. He has no sense of humour and no interest in the world outside of a very narrow set of his own hobbies and interests. I noticed this a lot less a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/20 09:08 PM
13

The way he treats you when it comes to sex and during your intimate moments reveals his true nature and his true feelings and thoughts about you! I also think this is true about the way they even speak about sex to/with you. Does he talk about fucking you or making love to you? Does his dirty talk revolve around the ways that he's going to make you feel pleasure, or the pleasure that you're going to give him. A useful way of weeding out porn addicts as well in my opinion.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/20 07:42 PM
4

I am actually loving Catherine the Great at the moment - boss ass older woman basically picking men as she fucking pleased whilst ruling a country.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/20 06:23 PM
14

I want to vomit. Women should have a blacklist for these creeps.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/20 08:14 PM
7

Thankfully in the UK that's now a crime and can get you put on the sex offenders register.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/20 08:10 PM
1

I'm in a similar situation. Marriage that is barely alive where I see him for less than 48hrs per week. Married young to the first person that would have me, who then proceeded to treat me like shit for 10 years. Asked for divorce/separation multiple times- he always comes up with a sob story. Met someone at work that turned from a friendship to romance. New guy treats me exactly as I should be treated. I have thought long and hard about the morality of my situation. My new man is special to me,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 12:01 PM
2

Reading this post made me decide I will no longer answer my phone after 10pm. My soon to be ex husband called me at 10.25pm last night (he works in another city) and I intended to have an early night. I needed to speak to him to do childcare arrangements but he kept me on the phone with his uninteresting chat and general "let's talk about me and how great I am" boring nonsense. I will no longer speak to him on the phone after 10pm,my sleep is important.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 11:21 AM
5

Psssshhht, just watch Working Girl on repeat. That should be FDS required viewing. The happy ending is not that she gets Harrison Ford, the happy ending is that she dumps Alec Baldwin and gets a corner office.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 11:15 AM
1

"Hi friend, I thought I would leave you to it as you said I annoy you. I'm doing fine, loving life. Hope you're well. " End.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 11:01 AM
7

He's great at that to be fair. We are also waiting to have sex until everything is settled and I'm free. His response was "its a good thing - I don't want this to be an affair, I want to love you properly". I do think he genuinely respects my value. He's also been supporting me to progress in my career and even wrote me recommendations for new jobs (he earns more than me so it's not to try and get me to support him). He says it's because he wants me to get the professional respect I deserve as a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 08:00 AM
97

To be honest, I think a large part of the problem with high fashion is that it's run by gay men who find hips, breasts and natural curves to be an unattractive inconvenience, and therefore their beauty standard is at best androgynous. Have a look at the amount of clothes in stores where its completely impossible to wear a bra! Then you contrast that with what straight men are told to find attractive, which is essentially a barbie doll. But men will say its because we read magazines, not because …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 12:24 AM
14

I usually meet the man that I'm seeing (I am in the process of attempting to get divorced from a LVM hobosexual, it's a whole thing - other man developed from a workplace friendship, life happens) for coffee at a starbucks midway between our houses because it's pretty convenient for me on the way home from work and it suits my schedule. Yesterday I decided to be pleasant but cooler on the phone to him, and to not make any suggestions for meeting up myself. Unprompted, he suggested ditching our u…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 09:18 PM
1

Easier said than done. I want to not fuck up my 5yo kid as much as possible and ideally I'd like to keep my house. I can't afford the mortgage alone though so I need to get everything worked out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 07:39 AM
18

Generosity with more than just his wallet. Does he give you the credit for things you have done? Would he put his professional reputation on the line to help you? Does he actively help you and support you to pursue your goals.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 04:03 AM
56

Sometimes if it's a little fluttery one, and you were generally making "in enjoying this" sounds it can be worth making sure. Obviously if you're going to ask this question and the answer is "no" you are required to follow up with "would you like me to keep going/do something else?".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 03:49 AM
8

I think it might have been via a friend of my sister who is a fashion pr. I think she promoted them for a time. I would maybe go into a smaller chain or independent boutique in your budget range that you like and ask is there anyone they know that they recommend, and then look them up on social media (which they will be on!) to get a better idea of them. I think probably look up tags on Instagram as well like #personalshopper #stylist #[yourcity] #wardrobemakeover #wardroberefresh etc. I follow …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 11:52 PM
23

I spent around 400 dollars once on a personal shopper /stylist to get me a new work wardrobe and it was so worth it. The money you spend you save on clothes that you otherwise would have bought and not worn or worn but didn't suit you. She worked with my budget, and the clothes I already had, and gave me a style guide personalised to me at the end, telling me what accessories, colours, styles and shapes to go for. She also had a list of sample outfits from the clothes we had bought plus what I a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 10:43 PM
1

Yes. Trying to work out how to navigate a divorce is part of the reason I'm here unfortunately. I've asked him many times and he worms his way back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 10:36 PM
1

This also happened to me. He spent my entire inheritance while he was fucking slags off tinder and plenty of fish. He now earns over twice my salary while I have a mountain of debt from trying to support him and not financially be a drain. I desperately am trying to work out how to divorce him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 02:44 PM
56

Hire a fucking housekeeper you cheap ass bum!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 02:33 PM
2

I struggle with the "never offering to pay for anything at all" thing. I am recovering from a financially abusive relationship though and I struggle with the idea of being "bought". Paying for the odd token thing (like some popcorn when he's bought dinner and the movie tickets and a drink at the bar or one round of drinks when he's bought all the rest) seems like a reasonable thing to do. I get it, I'm just in a period of adjusting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 12:48 PM
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