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hoofn Archive

View 2 posts and 17 comments by hoofn on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
18

hoofn/r/Divorce_Men09/05/26 10:53 AM
1

hoofn/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 11:39 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

How’s the first week been for you? I found a short term rental that I’m moving into this week. Shit is getting real. We’ve talked about needing space, hence the move, but I haven’t brought up divorce yet…
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/26 11:50 AM
2

I know it’s what I need to do. And you’re right, it’s scary as shit. But I am gaining strength and am really learning that I can do hard things. Wishing you well, brother
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/26 11:20 PM
2

Yeah, it’s been interesting. As I’ve finally been standing my ground and expressing all of my thoughts and feelings she has seemed completely confused. Not understanding my perspective. Then the dismissive avoidant attachment stuff was kind of figured out. It makes sense, sadly, that she would have never been able to hear me all these years when I did raise concerns. But yeah, you are likely right. I really don’t think she’ll be able to accept my decision.
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/26 05:08 PM
2

Guilt? Low self esteem and thinking it would be selfish of me to leave her? Therapy has helped me a lot. Had I been in therapy 20 years ago, maybe I would have realized this wasn’t working long ago.. and that it was ok for me to leave? But I’m here now, doing the best I can!
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/26 04:39 PM
2

Good idea. We’ve had a lot of hard talks recently, the big one will obviously be the hardest
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/26 02:54 PM
2

Good luck
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/26 02:41 PM
3

Thanks for the advice. Contacting an attorney is on my list for this coming week
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/26 02:41 PM
2

Dude, congrats on surviving the hard conversation. I hope it feels like some relief!?
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/26 02:40 PM
2

I know… I’ve never understood how she doesn’t see this. But, she’s been happy and has everything she has wanted… so i guess it makes sense
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/26 02:39 PM
2

Yeah, hormones are an issue but the lack of libido goes way back to nearly the beginning. I always held out hope that things might improve. I bought her toys, tried everything I could think of to help her feel comfortable and excited. She just hasn’t ever been very interested and has never seen the need or curiosity to look within herself to question why that is
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/26 11:33 AM
2

That’s one of the really hard parts. In a lot of ways we’re best friends. Unfortunately, I’m not sure I see her ever being able to get over my leaving her though. Maybe she’ll surprise me?
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/26 11:19 AM
3

Thanks for your perspective. I’ve been in therapy for a few years and I credit that for finally being able to see my patterns for what they are: people pleasing, putting out fires at my own expense, etc. Identifying the things I need to work on and actually beginning to do some of that work has helped me get to this point.
/r/Divorce_Men09/05/26 11:08 AM
1

This sounds so much like my situation, minus having a kid. And, we haven’t separated. First couples therapy session is coming up soon (after suggesting we go for a long time). She doesn’t know how on the fence I truly am. But total honesty is my new MO. It’s going to fucking suck and shit is going to hit the fan. But I have my boundaries formulated. She can either accept working on herself, and us, or that’s it. It’s brutal. I wish you all the luck!
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/26 12:32 AM
1

Life lessons I suppose!
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 10:18 PM
1

Heard. Thanks
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 03:47 PM
1

Thanks, I’ll check out the post you linked
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 03:46 PM
1

Not worth a million, I know that. That will take some doing to find out.
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 03:45 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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