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ivysaurah Archive

View 0 posts and 206 comments by ivysaurah on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
3

No. I’m not at all attracted to a provider who lacks discipline. Lack of loyalty = lack of discipline, and that’s a huge turn off for me. You mean you’re a man and can’t even deny your most basal desires for the betterment of your chosen family unit? It’s pathetic.
/r/RedPillWomen29/07/25 02:54 AM
–

I believe that you’re not overreacting, and he has the right to also not clean out his following list. My husband cleaned his up. I had to pester him a lot, but in the end he removed every single female that wasn’t related to him by blood or marriage. Because we’re married and he doesn’t want me having random men on my pages either. I personally find it humiliating. I personally would take this as an indicator that you two may be incompatible. I also see it as a sign that he does not take this r…
/r/RedPillWomen10/07/25 12:43 AM
6

You seem to want to be married to a financially stable doctor. Don’t blame you, but you can’t ignore red flags in exchange for a nice house and financial stability. Your post history is showing an abusive relationship. Leave before you have children and truly devalue yourself. You’re sexually incompatible, and he seems to lack empathy for you and your needs on many levels. His anger and mistreatment of you WILL escalate. Get a grip, finish school, find someone who actually loves you.
/r/RedPillWomen03/07/25 01:50 AM
1

This is giving satire, I’m assuming. But if it’s not, my advice is to get a lobotomy and then his behavior won’t bother you so much ❤️ hope this helps you
/r/RedPillWomen30/11/24 06:28 PM
6

I was always the chubby kid, and then the plain fat kid. When I turned 18 I started going to the gym everyday. At first it was only for 20 minutes. And then 45 minutes. And then before I knew it, I was seeing results and I loved weight lifting and I was there at least 1-1.5 hours a day. The diet: I never focused on calorie counting, just made an effort not to overeat (so stop when you’re full), only drink water, and avoid regular sugary foods. The occasional dessert won’t kill you, but try to li…
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/24 12:19 AM
16

As someone who has been hit abusively before, this isn’t the same. Please relax. You violated his space and boundaries while in pain and he swatted your hand away as a reflex. He didn’t hit you in the manner you’re trying to imply, but you feel the way you want to feel I guess.
/r/RedPillWomen19/06/24 02:48 PM
24

In my experience, for innocent little things like this, I would just openly (in a non dramatic way, making it clear you know it’s irrational) ask for validation. As long as it isn’t a frequent and exhausting experience, I find most men like when their women get a little bit jealous and need validation. It’s healthy to think your partner is so desirable. Just make sure you don’t turn it into a fight, more like a playful and vulnerable conversation.
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/24 12:40 AM
1

Fix the issue or get ready for a divorce. If you think being a “fantastic team” but only having sex a handful of times annually is going to work long term for any man, you are very mistaken. Being aware of your faults doesn’t mean anything if you’re still unwilling to work towards a solution. Think the IUD is the issue? Get it removed. Think his behaviors and yours are the issue? Seek therapy and work on fixing your dynamic. If you don’t give him sex, the tears he is showing you now are only the…
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/24 11:19 PM
5

Penises do not stretch your vagina. Look into pelvic floor strengthening exercises. I just had a baby and actually got noticeably “tighter” after birth because of all the pelvic floor workouts I had been doing.
/r/RedPillWomen16/01/24 08:51 PM
4

Eh this comment is whack. You should be in peak physical condition. I am in really good shape, wear a size small for most clothing lines, and eat really clean. I weigh 140 typically and I am a little over 5’4. You can see my ribs on the front of my chest so I definitely do not have weight to lose from here. I do pilates and yoga and some light jogging. Not bragging, just saying that weight is going to look very different for women depending on your body type, muscles, etc. My husband completely …
/r/RedPillWomen21/12/23 08:33 PM
8

I wrote them down on a piece of paper and then focused all of my energy on becoming someone who I could be proud of. Stumbled into my husband along the way. Found nothing but trash when I was focusing on finding men.
/r/RedPillWomen13/12/23 03:37 PM
15

This is a conversation to be has prior to becoming serious with a man. My now husband and I discussed these things around the first month of exclusively dating. It’s not shocking that a man nearing his 40s does not desire children. However your biological clock is ticking and I would not waste another second on this man if you desire children. There’s no guarantee that you’ll be fertile into your mid-late thirties. This thinking is the reason for skyrocketing IVF and other fertility treatments i…
/r/RedPillWomen11/12/23 06:49 PM
60

Very common issue here. People are morons and extreme virtue signaling is in right now with the mods of many subs.
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/23 01:51 PM
6

Yikes to that! Sorry you experienced that I will say I met up with VERY FEW guys from said dating app before meeting my husband. Just texted for as long as possible and was brutal in weeding guys out. But online dating does seem to increase of chance of meeting dangerous weirdos so definitely something to consider.
/r/RedPillWomen28/11/23 04:18 AM
15

I met my amazing husband on a dating app so I don’t really understand the shade towards them on this sub 😅 You have to weed through a ton of duds to find a good man anywhere you look, and it’s arguably more efficient to do so online. But to each their own. Finding a good man is hard. Finding a good man who shares your values and is attractive to you AND is attracted TO you is even harder. Be patient. Be selective with who you waste time with. And try to stay away from bars. You’re more likely to…
/r/RedPillWomen28/11/23 03:15 AM
3

Oh there’s no way to overthink something like misaligned values when it comes to having kids. My husband and I just had our first baby two months ago and any minor friction that you feel now will absolutely be accentuated with a baby.
/r/RedPillWomen27/11/23 02:43 PM
6

I agree 100%, thanks for elaborating and putting this into words.
/r/RedPillWomen27/11/23 01:35 AM
3

Yeah I find it distasteful and thankfully my now husband is a pretty jealous person as well so doesn’t really discuss anything about past partners unless asked. If it makes you uncomfortable, I would definitely draw a clear boundary around that kind of talk if/when the topic comes up again. I don’t necessarily see anything wrong with a person in their 30s having a past, but to brag about promiscuity just displays a misalignment in values for me personally.
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/23 10:46 PM
36

I think it is a red flag. My husband has never done this out of respect for me and our relationship. Temptation exists for both men and women. It’s called being a responsible adult in a consensually monogamous relationship. You censor your crass intrusive thoughts. I do think a man who’s unable to even silence his base desires in front of his partner is more likely to cheat on said partner.
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/23 08:50 PM
1

Being a nurturing safe place for my family. I love feeding my husband, making our home feel inviting, spending time with our daughter. Honestly, primarily my daughter is my meaning, and building a great home and future for her. But nurturing my husband and I’s relationship is a part of that. Taking care of myself to provide a great example for her. And just living! Experiencing the weather each day, tasting great food, feeling at peace, etc. Life is beautiful if you let it be. It’s supposed to b…
/r/RedPillWomen15/11/23 07:05 PM
2

Good call. Steer clear of him and guys like him.
/r/RedPillWomen09/11/23 08:08 PM
6

Be healthy, clean, learn to present your looks in the most realistically flattering, relatively modest way. Educate yourself in a field that will attract the kind of men you seek. Stop sleeping with men who give you BS excuses like “you aren’t educated enough.” I think the main mistake that women like you make is wasting time on men who you like and see a future with, but who don’t see a future with you. Don’t sleep with guys who don’t want to commit to you. And if a man gives you some ultimatum…
/r/RedPillWomen09/11/23 07:55 PM
2

We keep snacks and a Nespresso set up in our bedroom 🤷‍♀️ No bugs here. Just keep things clean. I sweep the floors, we have a trash can with the lid that opens when you hover your hand over it, and we’re adults so it’s not like we’re scattering crumbs everywhere. You should be fine. I wouldn’t micromanage this.
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/23 06:14 PM
8

This question is being posted here constantly. No. The general consensus is always no.
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/23 05:35 AM
19

I am right leaning and neither myself or my husband joke like this?? He’s just a racist. Good luck with that longterm.
/r/RedPillWomen27/10/23 03:19 PM
1

I have a diamond engagement ring and I only wear it to go out. I live in my wedding band. Personally I don’t really get the hype of real diamonds or flashy rings. It doesn’t really prove anything and it’s just a marketing ploy.
/r/RedPillWomen13/10/23 10:27 PM
10

Based on your post history, you seem to have some attachment issues that you should address. You have known this guy for 2 months. He is giving a lot of indicators that he is not very attached to you. Why are you willing to derail your future for him? You have known him only 2 months and you have provided easy sex and companionship to him without much commitment on his end. He is 38 years old and has chosen to be a bachelor, and is not showing any signs that he’s particularly attached to you. Yo…
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/23 10:30 PM
53

I don’t say no, and my husband tries not to either. I think rejection, especially if regular, can damage a relationship overtime. Of course there’s nuances and exceptions to all concepts like this but yeah overall, rejecting intimacy with your partner regularly can cause a lot of harm.
/r/RedPillWomen03/10/23 03:43 AM
4

It depends on the person and the situation honestly.. I had dated other guys (like a one date and then I wasn’t interested based on their behavior, etc). I had been with two other men age 19 before meeting my now husband. We had talked for a while and our physical attraction was very strong so we went for it very early on. 5 years of marriage and a little baby girl later, I would say it all worked out.
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/23 01:39 PM
10

Yes. Night and day difference. But to be fair, as a teenager I was not dressing well, was 50+ lbs overweight, and had no idea how to do my hair and makeup properly. I also changed those things while I lost weight. Dropped 70 lbs by the time I turned 19 and I met my now husband around the same time. The attention from men was very intimidating to me at the time because I wasn’t used to it so I know the shift was dramatic. Eventually I adjusted to the change.
/r/RedPillWomen17/09/23 03:55 AM
10

In my experience, the more of a nurturing role I have played for my husband, the more he has been attracted to me through the years. Just don’t forget the spicier bedroom side of things too. That’s why making the time to go out on dates, dressing up, making an effort, buying some nice lingerie, maybe sending some spicy photos spontaneously, etc, is important. But I wouldn’t worry about being too nurturing unless it crosses the line into nagging/overbearing territory. Men are wired to want to pro…
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/23 08:47 PM
5

I get it lol, good luck ttc!
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/23 09:08 AM
24

Personally, I never shared clinical stuff about my ovulation while TTC. We knew we were trying. I just seduced him/took charge during my fertile windows, I never said when I was ovulating. But we are very uhh active regularly so it’s not difficult to get him going. I felt weird putting pressure onto something as natural and fun as intimacy. Currently 39 weeks. Maybe try this approach if this is an issue for you. The less stress/pressure the better.
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/23 02:48 AM
1

Alright, just saying to keep it in mind, especially if you plan to have multiple children as it’s advised to have a certain amount of time to recover between each pregnancy. The sign of poverty comment is an odd take, not going to lie. I am 25, 39 weeks pregnant, married for 5 years, my husband and I are business owners, and definitely not impoverished despite not being born into wealth. In the traditional circles I run in, this is the norm, and I do live in a city, not the middle of nowhere. It…
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/23 12:25 AM
3

It’s a common misconception that the best age biologically to have children is mid thirties. There is a correlation between this relatively new social norm, and the increasing need for medical intervention when trying to conceive. The reality is a woman’s fertility typically peaks in their 20s and declines every cycle past that point. Of course everyone has a different timeline and it’s not too late to have children in your mid 30s for most women. This is why IVF treatments have become so increa…
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/23 12:18 AM
3

You two sound compatible if you’re this lax about your futures. No reason for your credit to be that abysmal. Dig your heels in and work hard and pay your debts in a timely matter. Lose your dead weight boyfriend if you want to change. You’ve asked about this so many times and I don’t get what you’re hoping to achieve. No one is coming to save you. You are wasting your youth and falling into a cycle of poverty that isn’t necessary. I would throw the boyfriend out entirely, work hard and live in …
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/23 06:23 PM
6

Echoing other sentiments here with a bit to add. This is who he is. I personally find that trait unattractive in a man, but you may be willing to live with it. Being passive aggressive won’t help and I doubt you will change this. Make sure you’re okay with this in all walks of life because he is going to expect a division of work that does not take your gendered strengths/weaknesses into account. Personally that’s a deal breaker for me. However it does seem this issue could be solved by a collap…
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/23 05:49 PM
12

That makes it even worse? He cheated on you specifically then. So he doesn’t respect you and he still lacks discipline. No explanation is going to change that. Cheaters also lie by nature. Do you know how many cheaters say they’ll never do it again because of insert bullshit reason here when the reality is, when things get hard, he will do it again. You obviously aren’t okay with infidelity so move on. Marrying someone like this will be resigning yourself to a life of misery for no reason and he…
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/23 10:39 PM
12

What do you think, you’re gonna get a different answer this time? You’re a fool if you pursue this relationship further. Him only cheating on you actually makes it even worse. Move on.
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/23 10:34 PM
29

No, he knows we share values but I don’t go out of my way to put a label on my thinking. Even participating in this sub. I am just doing me and my values overlap a lot with the content here. That doesn’t necessarily mean that I would take a hard stance in identifying as a RPW.
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/23 01:14 AM
54

You’re going to have to be able to find energy to help with his business. If you are expecting him to find energy for your priorities, find energy for his. I understand it is very hard but I did this and it changed this dynamic for the better. I still work from the home and am able to be the primary caregiver to my family. But I answer calls, run advertising, keep insurances and paperwork in order for the business alongside managing the house. If you make a schedule and understand that every pha…
/r/RedPillWomen30/08/23 10:59 AM
7

I love feeding my husband. Through the years I have started cooking more of his meals. He gets an iced latte and to go breakfast each morning (he leaves for work very early), and his lunch is always packed with healthy foods and snacks that he enjoys. It’s always nice knowing he’s fed and knows he’s loved and appreciated by me.
/r/RedPillWomen29/08/23 07:22 PM
10

Set your pride aside and do not react to negative behavior on his end. If he is withdrawing and being critical, give him space, take some deep breaths, and do not respond. Men typically respond better to behavior like this. I hate to liken it to this but, it’s almost like when you have a puppy and they do something bad, it’s usually advised to ignore them rather than give attention to the bad behavior, whether it be a negative or positive response. If this is not abusive behavior on his end and …
/r/RedPillWomen29/08/23 10:48 AM
27

Id reckon you aren’t following up apologies with changes in action. If you are truly sorry for something, your actions following the apology should reflect that. Otherwise don’t bother apologizing. If he is just being harsh/unforgiving over an isolated incident rather than a pattern of repeated behavior, that is a different story.
/r/RedPillWomen29/08/23 10:31 AM
2

If it is for you, I fully support your endeavors. Just do not go into this expecting your weight loss transformation to cure him of his degeneracy. He isn’t addicted to porn because of their bodies. It’s a chemical release in the brain triggered by the content, just like any drug.
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/23 03:08 PM
12

Strength training. Eat less. Focus on getting protein, fruits, and vegetables with each meal. Don’t overeat on fats. Limit processed foods and refined sugars. Drink water or black tea/coffee. That’s it. There’s no secret recipe. Weight loss is pretty straight forward. It’s the mental aspect of food that is hard to overcome. Edit: it seems your partner is recovering from a porn addiction that devastated you. Make sure your desire for weight loss is coming from a healthy place.
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/23 01:36 AM
10

This is coming from a good place on his end. Are you married? If not, I would discuss that before you combine finances. However having a joint account and household budget removes a lot of these feelings that you’re having without taking from his provider role. My husband and I have “our money,” but logistically I know that he provides the majority of it. So yeah, if you two are in a place to talk about things like this, I would make marriage and plans for the future a bigger priority. And there…
/r/RedPillWomen24/08/23 09:43 AM
3

It tend to soften the blow with my words, as I would want. “Hey babe, I need to talk about something, is now a good time?” Give him the ability to say no, like if they had a stressful day or they’re just feeling overwhelmed. If yes, I continue. “I just want to say that you do XYZ (big, sweeping things that you love about your partner) so well, so I want you to know I really do appreciate and love you, but lately it makes me feel insert emotion when you do THIS and I need to talk about it instead…
/r/RedPillWomen24/08/23 09:30 AM
9

Have you tried communicating that these comments make you feel this way? There’s nothing wrong with a fantasy, but there’s also nothing wrong with him keeping it to himself. Some men do not realize the weight of these things to their female partners and sharing your perspective may encourage him to keep private about it. I cannot relate 100%. I don’t say it to be smug, but I am my husband’s type and I was blessed with an hourglass figure. But I have a larger nose than I would like, which he used…
/r/RedPillWomen23/08/23 01:27 PM
3

25F, married 5 years, and 36 weeks pregnant. Feel free to message me anytime!
/r/RedPillWomen19/08/23 05:53 PM
3

Cooking is an important skill. If you are a parent and have not taught ALL of your children regardless of gender to be proficient in the kitchen, you have failed hugely as a parent. My mother had many flaws but she refused to send adults out into the world who were unable to feed themselves. I have been cooking entire meals from scratch since before I finished elementary school. My husband definitely appreciates it and I plan to pass this on to my children.
/r/RedPillWomen19/08/23 03:04 PM
3

A grown man who throws tantrums and then excuses it with feeling “disrespected” is a very dangerous thing. I would find this kind of behavior very difficult to look past. He lacks control and discipline and he’s inherently selfish - that is the root of this issue. I don’t see those things resolving themselves so quickly, if ever. Love is tricky and it’s easy to believe there’s no one else better suited for you when you’re in it. I would get some space from him. Go no contact for a while, if not …
/r/RedPillWomen19/08/23 02:57 AM
5

I believe you’re observing poor leaders. A man who cannot respect his chosen wife and love her loyally lacks discipline. It is incredibly weak for a man to set such a poor example of love and loyalty to his family and then blame it on basal urges, which for me and many other women is a turn off. It depends on the lifestyle you’re seeking as a woman. I see a lot of ugly expectations from modern women seeking providers. Women are not biologically wired to contribute nothing to the family unit. Wom…
/r/RedPillWomen18/08/23 06:12 PM
3

I would confront and start procedures for divorce. My husband and I have always drawn this hard boundary: if either of us cheat, it’s over. We both came from households who had a parent be unfaithful, and we both view it as a deep betrayal that cannot be healed from, and a very selfish/weak choice that shows an absolute lack of respect for your partner. If a night of sexual pleasure is worth destroying the sanctity of our 5 years of mostly happy marriage, the guilty party clearly no longer loves…
/r/RedPillWomen18/08/23 02:40 PM
34

God, you sound… Insufferable here to me. You could have gently spoken up to your boyfriend during the dinner about how it was making you uncomfortable? That would have been your opportunity to have him “back you” on this issue. Simple, adult solution. I am certain the waitress wasn’t always there so you had plenty of opportunity to voice your concerns to him. I feel like she was probably just excited to be able to speak her native tongue for once, and your boyfriend understood this. Is it a bit …
/r/RedPillWomen17/08/23 08:43 PM
4

“I love him, but I don’t want to be around him for extended periods of time because his presence makes me feel exhausted/drained. He gets enraged when I try to bring the problem up. But I love him!?” So… Maybe not a good idea to marry him??? Did you seriously type this out and not see the answer? You can’t change such a fundamental aspect of someone and being around constant negativity when that isn’t how you’re wired is a recipe for disaster. You’ve made a mistake and it’s not too late to go fi…
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/23 12:39 PM
19

You’re overreacting and being kind of mean imo. He was so excited by a small gesture from you that he went and got a gift he was obviously very excited to give you. You told him to not plan anything because you had to tell him to plan a hotel specifically and then got upset when he didn’t go against your wishes and get a hotel??? That’s crazy to me. You watch too many movies. If you want a hotel, tell him what you want. It’s not like that’s a standard anniversary celebration anyways. Or better y…
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/23 04:04 AM
5

It’s much easier to criticize and hate others than to practice critical self reflection.
/r/RedPillWomen05/08/23 02:59 PM
29

Don’t think this way. Stay away from men’s groups tbh. They are often virginal incel types spewing hatred born from sexual frustration. Every single person has negative and positive factors to them. If your husband is happy with you, just do your best to flourish and improve within your marriage. That’s all anyone can expect. You aren’t spoiled, dregs, none of that. You’re a complex person.
/r/RedPillWomen05/08/23 01:59 AM
8

Very unreasonable ask imo. But you do you. You’re going to be hard pressed to find a man who is willing to PROPOSE to you before you are willing to give him the bare minimum of loyalty.
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/23 08:41 PM
17

How can anyone make the commitment of marriage to you if you aren’t willing to display that you’re a loyal person? That’s a ridiculous ask in my eyes.
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/23 07:43 PM
12

If you want someone else, you can jump ship and date the other person by breaking up with your current partner. Though to be so fickle with your loyalty shows for many that you aren’t marriage material imo. The grass is always greener and all that. If you’re in a loving, committed, respectful relationship that is giving you what you need and you share the same values, it’s unlikely you’ll find that easily elsewhere so I think loyalty should be a strong foundation if you want to someday marry thi…
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/23 07:26 PM
13

Communicate your regret clearly and maturely and show/communicate how you’ve made an effort to change from the person who previously hurt him.
/r/RedPillWomen22/07/23 04:28 PM
8

Are these changes YOU want for yourself? Do you want a career? Do you want a more expansive social life? If the answers to these questions are yes, truthfully, then congrats on finding a partner willing to challenge you to become better in ways that you also desire, and it might be worth a shot to make these improvements because even if he’s an asshole, you’ll be happier for it. If the answer is no, you are content the way you are, then move on and find a man who values who you are because of th…
/r/RedPillWomen19/07/23 05:56 PM
-7

If you don’t know how being a SW contradicts the values of this sub then you should go do some reading 😂 Im not gonna hate, I am a married traditional woman in her 20s so I feel pity if nothing else, just telling it how I see it.
/r/RedPillWomen15/07/23 09:28 PM
-5

I don’t know if I would word it like this as it’s a bit too narrow of a view to be applied in real life. I think the purpose of this sub is to be a realistic and equal partner to a good man in order to achieve your desires for the future, which can take form in many ways. Using men like a parasite (like Op) until your youth is gone and you’ve been tossed aside repeatedly by men definitely has no relation to those values for me.
/r/RedPillWomen15/07/23 07:35 PM
11

I don’t think this is very relevant to this sub at all. I honestly think this type of lifestyle directly conflicts with the ideals expressed here as it depletes your value as a woman overtime. You do you.
/r/RedPillWomen15/07/23 06:50 PM
4

Good news: lip filler can be dissolved. I would take this as a sign to be wary of fillers. They rarely look good outside of social media.
/r/RedPillWomen15/07/23 05:17 PM
5

Youtube and practice is the only way! You’ll only improve with time unfortunately but having video recipes is very helpful. I started cooking very young but I learn new recipes this way.
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/23 08:18 PM
5

You’re a dual income household. If you do not already have a housekeeper to come for biweekly/monthly deep cleans, I recommend you do so. You cannot be expected to keep a house working full-time and you should not feel like a failure for struggling to do so. Once you have a housekeeping service to do the heavy lifting in the house (like deep cleaning bathrooms, floors, baseboards, dusting, ceilings/fans, etc), develop a schedule for the rest. IE: every other day rotation between the two of you f…
/r/RedPillWomen11/07/23 03:35 PM
1

Yes I understand, thankfully my husband comes from a very tight knit family and the majority of them do not speak ANY English. They facetime us frequently and my kids will need to speak with them as well to be polite. I understand Portuguese well, just struggle with speaking it myself still, so I will make sure English is present in the household without being excluded from Portuguese conversation. Unfortunately I was never taught Hebrew, so that will die with my generation.. But I have also con…
/r/RedPillWomen10/07/23 05:31 PM
1

I still can see as an American that Brazil has a very defined culture depending on the region. Special holidays, traditions, foods, etc. There are people of different backgrounds, but there is a level of conformity too that feels different from America. There is a lot less separation of race/background in Brazil compared to America and it creates a more homogenous culture, which I think is very nice. This is true for most European nations too I think! I just would really have the conversation. I…
/r/RedPillWomen10/07/23 03:40 PM
3

Personally my perspective is a bit different. My husband is Brazilian, I am Jewish American. We have been together for over five years now and are expecting a daughter. His culture will be an influence in her life - arguably a strong one considering his entire family still lives in Brazil aside from him. I am not very close to my Jewish culture and have converted to his religion, am learning the language, and have my in-laws teach me to prepare the foods he grew up eating. We have visited his fa…
/r/RedPillWomen10/07/23 03:00 PM
2

Confidence. Improve on what you have. Every man and woman has a different flavor, and there’s always people into that. It sounds like you would benefit from more confidence. I value control in social situations, so I tend to be friendly but I have learned as I get older to hold my tongue and wait for the right moment to say more. I used to babble a lot when I was younger, but this has helped a lot. Slower movements also tend to come with confidence. I achieved more physical grace when I got into…
/r/RedPillWomen09/07/23 02:43 AM
4

Anecdotal evidence doesn’t trump scientific fact and statistics. You are more likely to have infertility issues and complications after age 35, hence why a Dr will classify these women as “high risk.” I am getting my information from reputable sources, Google why IVF rates have increased in recent years, it is recorded as a shifting in societal values. Is it possible to have a healthy pregnancy at an older age, obviously. But that doesn’t change the FACT that IVF rates have increased due to men …
/r/RedPillWomen08/07/23 03:59 PM
72

You let him go. You two separated. And you are not a young bride anymore so finding those things will be hard. I wont lie, the way you sound is very pitiful/shallow here which is going to make finding another partner like this even more difficult. Find some worth within yourself. Find a goal aside from shallow things like free clothes and makeup. Men don’t like when women openly use them. All you stated that you liked about him was he spoiled you financially and was white. I could go on for hour…
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/23 03:10 PM
56

Move on. If you want kids, it may be difficult to achieve now if not impossible so see a fertility specialist and potentially look at plans for preserving your fertility (ie egg retrieval) to keep your options open in the future. But definitely move on and look for either a new future or a new man. I would also recommend seeking a man slightly older than you. You two broke up. He is with someone significantly younger that he clearly cares for and respects. It hurts but you need to accept that he…
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/23 01:42 PM
3

It is an urgent issue if you are expecting a child, I don’t know what you mean. He should have accomplished these things before getting you pregnant if you ask me. If you are already living a comfortable life financially, then he should be a man and make plans that immediately include his wife and child coming with him. Not some vague “Ah well you can tough it out while I figure out how to get you over here.” I would have another conversation about this, but also about his apparently deeply root…
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/23 01:34 PM
3

Exactly, if I wasn’t crazy about a date right away, I moved on. And when I found the man who brought me peace and security, I avoided having “the grass is greener” type thoughts and really just went all in. I married him when I was 20, but we both knew we wanted to start a family early so aside from knowing, I would say to make sure the communication is there too and the values/dreams for the future align well.
/r/RedPillWomen06/07/23 10:25 PM
9

Yeah, head over heels from day one. He was my only boyfriend but Id been on isolated dates before him that I had no interest in pursuing. One date in with my husband and just getting a text from him made my heart race. He started to feel like home to me very soon into the relationship, and he always made it clear how serious he was about me without making me feel suffocated. It’s been five years of marriage and it’s crazy how I seem to love him more every year. I guess when you know, you know.
/r/RedPillWomen06/07/23 09:59 PM
6

Once we were saying “I love you,” we were discussing marriage. I wanted it to be clear that I wasn’t interested in wasting my time no matter how young I was in a long term relationship without marriage and children being a clearly defined goal. I would have brought it up again already if I were you, but especially now a year in with that mentioned red flag for commitment issues, I would try to have it as soon as possible.
/r/RedPillWomen06/07/23 07:07 PM
1

Yes I agree. Male fertility is typically on a much different timeline than female.
/r/RedPillWomen05/07/23 09:15 PM
14

Personally I would set a hard boundary and explain that female fertility declines by this age, and by 35 you’re considered “advanced maternal age” which increases your risk of complications. IVF interventions have become increasingly necessary because of this narrative that women can just wait and wait to have kids and it isn’t always true. He should be more realistic.
/r/RedPillWomen05/07/23 11:34 AM
9

Then I definitely recommend pulling back a bit. You can’t force someone to do something, and if you communicate the issue that’s all you can do to influence him (which personally I would do regardless of his responsiveness, just once, before pulling back to focus on other things). Try saying something along the lines of, “I notice you’ve been more distant with me lately and it has been bothering me. Have I done something to upset you or is there something else going on that’s causing you stress?…
/r/RedPillWomen05/07/23 02:27 AM
8

You’ve given your answers here. If you don’t know, don’t bluff. No one else can make these decisions for you imo. I would honestly give him what you’ve written here as a response. My husband and I discussed values and family dynamics before marriage. I prefer to take a nurturing role and want to be the primary caregiver to our children. I would need someone who is more equipe to be a leader as my partner. Therefore a lot of these questions would fall into this: he would need to give me advice an…
/r/RedPillWomen05/07/23 02:23 AM
22

Order him the hoodie. Being childish and desperate isn’t going to help you. Marriage is supposed to be for life. Expect highs and lows. Try pulling back a bit yourself. Don’t be cold, still be friendly and loving, but focus on a hobby and some self improvement a bit instead of smothering him with attempts to win back his affection. He’ll likely come around with a bit of time. Communication is also a more mature route. Express your needs and ask him if something is wrong that you can help with. B…
/r/RedPillWomen05/07/23 02:05 AM
3

I can’t relate per say as I was raised blue collar and this made me pretty handy. I went to school and wound up never using it, seeing as my dream deep down was always to be a wife and mother and my husband brought that desire back to me. I am not sure if it’s because of my upbringing or not, but I find that most tasks can be figured out with the internet nowadays. Driving I would pursue lessons in (American with no public transport so I was taught young), but everything else like cooking, handy…
/r/RedPillWomen04/07/23 04:05 PM
27

They’re harder to find. I met my husband when I was 19, he was 21, we married a year in, and we’ve been married for 5 years with a baby due in September. It’s harder to find. Just don’t compromise on your values and communicate them clearly. The right person will come eventually. This may be seen as unpopular, but the main draw to my husband when we were only talking online was the fact that he had himself re-baptized recently before meeting me. He was converting from Catholicism to a more mains…
/r/RedPillWomen04/07/23 03:27 PM
3

Allow yourself a nap, make it a priority! Pregnant women tend to require more sleep than regular healthy adults. We are creating a human life. There’s definitely a balance to strike between being kind to yourself and maintaining your disciplines during pregnancy. Good luck, you’re doing fine, and wishing you an easy delivery.
/r/RedPillWomen03/07/23 07:48 PM
25

A third party matched you. Try not to be absolutely insecure, but feeling a bit humbled by a potential partner is typically a good sign. I love my husband and constantly feel like I am so lucky to have him. If you try to maintain that perspective instead of focusing on what YOU feel is lacking within yourself, I think you’ll be a lot better off. Feelings of inadequacy can be shifted into feelings of admiration with the right positive mindset.
/r/RedPillWomen03/07/23 11:37 AM
2

It’s all temporary. Even a text to communicate that you see how much slack your husband has picked up while you’re out of commission would probably make him smile if you don’t do this already. I find that communication always helps everyone feel better about things like this. I live in Florida so I feel you on the heat wave lol. I work out in my living room at home now and for only 30 minutes a day. Sex is important and I make an effort to always be available (within reason) as it’s a form of co…
/r/RedPillWomen03/07/23 10:56 AM
18

I am 29 weeks with my first currently, have recently gotten uncomfortably large, and though it’s been hard to keep up with it, I have kept up with exercising daily (Pregnancy & Postpartum TV on Youtube) since around 17-18 weeks, which has helped me a lot all around with symptoms and to stay more active and able to squat down and whatnot so far. I rest more often for sure, but I am keeping up with the house and trying to get ahead so things don’t fall apart in the last few weeks. As for moods… I …
/r/RedPillWomen03/07/23 12:35 AM
6

I personally love Lila Rose. She has great perspectives that really resonate with me and she leads by example. As for homemaking skills, my on YT shorts (which is a lot less censored/liberal than Tiktok) algorithm is tailored towards cooking videos, organization/cleaning, decorating… It doesn’t have to be a rp or trad wife creator! I will say that learning happened the quickest for me when I had someone else to take care of (my husband). Congrats on all of this self improvement, that’s awesome!
/r/RedPillWomen02/07/23 02:29 AM
5

Ok buddy, it’s pretty obvious you’re trolling 😂 Unfortunately too many people associate these ideas with being red pilled because of clowns like you and your inflammatory unoriginal “jokes.”
/r/RedPillWomen01/07/23 08:04 PM
19

Assuming this isn’t a joke (which is seems to be), you don’t have a man. You have a little boy unworthy of leading anybody. Any man who can’t practice basic discipline isn’t leadership material.
/r/RedPillWomen01/07/23 01:33 AM
10

You should not submit to a person who has not earned your trust. That being said, having an adult PRIVATE discussion in a respectful manner is vastly different from nagging. And don’t ever assume you know it all. A good man will hear your perspective and discuss his perspective with you, coming to a compromise if possible. But I think a lot of people think they’re 100% right all of the time and close their minds to this kind of thinking when that’s just so unreasonable and arrogant.
/r/RedPillWomen27/06/23 05:41 PM
10

There is no set rule, red pill men especially the podcast bros have kind of skewed the message of the movement. It’s about being real about your worth and expectations at the end of the day. Nowadays, people are more sexually promiscuous, it’s unfortunate but true for most. I would say personally in your 30s anything in the double digits for a man or a woman is a red flag, it’s often indicative of intimacy issues. But there are a lot of other factors that go into determining a persons worth as a…
/r/RedPillWomen25/06/23 06:53 PM
29

I was a lot like this when I met my husband. He brought out a sense of security in me that resulted in me softening through the years. That being said, I still am willing to help him on a construction site if needed, I still lift weights, etc (though I am 7 months pregnant now so that has temporarily changed lol). But for him, I feel soft, caring, emotionally vulnerable. My point is, as long as you’re conscious of it, there’s no shame in protecting yourself until the right person comes around to…
/r/RedPillWomen23/06/23 07:21 PM
3

It’s unpopular here, but I moved in with my now husband several months into dating. Granted, we were very young and in love and worked long hours. I was there so often he encouraged me to stay there. We were however already discussing marriage from a very early stage in our relationship, so I think defining your expectations for the future is very important. Have a 5 year plan together before moving in together. And make sure there is an out. People can change when living with them and you shoul…
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/23 10:00 PM
24

Exercise regularly, maintain a healthy weight, practice good hygiene, drink a lot of water, GET ENOUGH SLEEP in regular cycles, eat cleanly, dress for your body type, basic skincare/moisturizer/sunscreen, and go light on makeup if you choose to wear it (just use it to accentuate your natural features, ie: I have pretty eyes so I make this my focal point).
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/23 12:25 AM
1

My husband and I have a very similar lifestyle. This shift started when we got married. I always am happy to host his boys nights. He never puts me in a position to feel insecure or alone, and I give him the same respect. I think it’s a very natural and healthy progression for two people serious about forming a strong family together. We also take interest in one another hobbies too. My husband loves rock concerts, I don’t really, but I love that he includes me and I have a great time with him a…
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/23 12:15 AM
7

I am not entirely sure, my husband was my third date and first longterm relationship. But I would assume just understanding the issues you may have because of the trauma of having many relationships so that you know to manage them, and being careful not to treat potential partners as if they’re disposable/replaceable.
/r/RedPillWomen18/06/23 01:49 AM
38

Just your ability to form lasting, intimate connections with romantic partners. I wouldn’t say there’s a specific number like that for it. An excess of romantic partners for either sex is a major red flag for me as it is usually indicative of intimacy issues.
/r/RedPillWomen18/06/23 01:40 AM
38

Congratulations! Talk everything through before hand. Talk about what your expectations for division of labor are for one another. Talk about what life will look like when/if you all have children. Talk about how you expect one another to conduct themselves in public (clubbing without the other party, remaining a united front even when you fight, etc). Talk about finances. Being a SAHW or SAHM is financially quite vulnerable if that is your plan, and you need to have agreements in place. My husb…
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/23 11:23 PM
4

Agreed. My husband doesn’t even go out at night or much at all NOW because he would rather stay with me now that I am in the third trimester. Having children means you are entering a new stage of life and if you aren’t okay with that, don’t have them.
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/23 08:40 PM
26

I don’t believe either party should have nights out with an infant at home. My husband and I both know this as traditionalists. It is time to apply some discipline and practice family values. And to other commenters, if you want a traditional wife, you make her one, that doesn’t involve working outside of the home. Hence why not all men can afford a traditional wife. You don’t get to have your cake and eat it too. Occasional nights out are one thing, but the reality when you have a child is that…
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/23 05:11 PM
3

I am not sure about you specifically but my experience with hormonal birth control really affected my moods, my ability to maintain a healthy weight, etc. I didn’t even notice how bad it made me feel until I went off it and life got easier. I went off over a year ago as I was trying to get pregnant. I also suffered an early miscarriage last year but am 6.5 months pregnant now. My moods are so much more stable and I find it easier to be happy now. I am not sure what we will do for birth control i…
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/23 03:22 PM
7

It took a bit of growth for sure. Getting along is easy in the start, I’d say you start you chafe one another a bit around 1-2 years. The best advice we ever heard was, ”It isn’t you two against each other in a fight, it’s the two of you against the problem.” So we learned eventually to give each other time to cool off before coming together to talk it out. Also learning to give up immature passive aggressive tendencies was important. If something bothers you, talk about it. And try not to get o…
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/23 07:30 PM
44

There were a few things with my husband. I could lay in his arms forever and never get bored. I loved the way he smelled even if he hadn’t showered yet that day. I went through my work shifts in the best mood knowing I could go and see him when I got off. With time, the puppy love comes and goes, but eventually I realized I could see him being the father of my children. I could see how our values meshed so well together. And one day I realized that he felt like home to me. We got engaged soon af…
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/23 05:06 PM
13

This isn’t really a RPW question and more so a question of what you’re comfortable with. I send photos to my husband and I did when we were living together before marriage as well. But I trusted him deeply by the time we started doing that and I am confident he would never do something like that to damage my reputation. If you aren’t comfortable, you aren’t comfortable, so tell him this. If he has an issue with it, he can find a partner who is willing to provide this, and you can find a partner …
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/23 12:47 PM
6

Yes, disclose it. Lying is never good when building a foundation with a potential partner. Maybe not on the first date though… 😅
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/23 01:41 AM
15

I underwent a 70 lbs weight loss at age 18, gained some happy weight once I got married and got it off a few years ago, have been pretty steady ever since. My advice is keep it simple and make it enjoyable. Don’t go for fad diets. Keto, fasting, etc, isn’t usually sustainable for most people longterm. Understand nutrition. I started watching Youtubers who talked about nutrition. Make sure you’re getting fibrous veggies and protein with every meal. Eat colorful meals that you enjoy. Have one serv…
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/23 01:38 AM
12

His way of living is fine and many women out there would be happy to lead him. Your expectations for a partner are also fine and plenty of men would be happy to lead you. If it’s a deal breaker for you, best to let things break. I don’t think it’s possible/healthy to guide a grown man into changing their values like this. Feel free to have an honest discussion about it, but it’s out of your control how he reacts to your feelings here.
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/23 10:38 PM
4

It’s for life, so marrying a good one is #1! Thank you
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/23 09:19 PM
9

I think that’s a great solution! You aren’t wrong for feeling burnt out and this plan sounds like a great compromise for you both.
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/23 08:13 PM
3

It is if you make it one by taking pride in this work! I also believe playing a supportive role to your husband is deeply important, and vice versa of course. My husband does construction work and we own a business, I do all bookkeeping and have been on construction sites prior to my pregnancy in order to help with clean up/demo/etc if he needs it. My husband will buy us takeout and tidy the house if I am sick/busy. We’re partners.
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/23 07:50 PM
3

It is our money. I am cheap/thrifty in nature, but he fully expects me to manage our bill payments and budgeting. He asks me before making large purchases (anything over $100), and I give him that same respect. Men who view the money they make as “their money” are not cut out for traditional roles in a marriage. It can quickly become abusive if he expects his wife to be a homemaker but also not have ownership over household funds. But exploiting your position as a housewife and making frivolous …
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/23 07:48 PM
5

Marriage first. But after that, we talked about what our expectations for one another would be, and I quit my job. It’s easiest for me psychologically if I treat my supportive/homemaking role as a job (which is is). But this mentality helps. Of course I “work” fewer hours between breaks now that I am 6.5 months pregnant but that’s beside the point 😂
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/23 06:31 PM
45

The reality is if you’re working, you should not be doing the majority of the housework. I worked for years in the beginning of my marriage. I always cooked and did a bit more than my husband as it’s just what I am more comfortable with, but I never tended to our space 100%. He helped just like I helped share our financial burden. Now that I am a pregnant and mostly a housewife (aside from helping a bit with our business, but much less than before as I do it mainly from home), my husband does no…
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/23 06:22 PM
9

No, the men who are spouting off these lies are ruining the RP community and its image. The reality is, a man who cheats is a man who lacks discipline. Any man who lacks discipline is emasculating himself in my eyes, as a traditional woman. Traditional women seek strong, disciplined men who are able to lead soundly and provide an example to their children through their actions. Being unable to stay faithful to a chosen wife and potential mother of your offspring makes you a weak, lesser man. It …
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/23 06:12 PM
–

Hm.. Alright then… Not really seeing why this has been posted here.
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/23 04:34 AM
11

Nice job! My husband and I run a construction company. Now pregnant, I stay 100% at home doing clerical work, but I am glad I got to work with him physically in the past so that I could develop empathy for how exhausting his days usually are. As long as he’s doing his best, it’s all any wife can ask for. We don’t like to be attacked for our shortcomings when we’re working hard from our perspective either. Communication is great to do before blowing up, but empathetic understanding is also very i…
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/23 10:38 PM
3

Awesome, glad my perspective could help! Communicating your expectations of one another always makes things a ton easier and saves potential irritation/blow ups. Good luck and congrats on the move!
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/23 01:49 PM
19

If you are traditional, I would assume you take up the role of homemaker? Therefore I think it is more our role to handle unpacking organization/floor planning as the home is more our domain. That’s not to say you can’t ask, “Hey honey, can you help me unpack this room?” and provide instruction. I feel like the leadership role of a husband traditionally doesn’t pertain to the organization of a home when the woman is typically the overseer of day to day functions and organization. As for the mail…
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/23 01:16 PM
5

You can maintain a healthy weight easily with discipline. I lost 70 lbs age 18 and have kept it off ever since (now 25). Eat at home. Stop buying snacks/easily accessible food. Cook everything you possibly can. Eat fruit and veggies with every meal. It gets easier with time. Exercise 4-5 times a week. I do Youtube workout videos in my living room so there’s no excuse not to. Stop obsessing over your appearance. I used to care about skincare regiments and whatnot and ironically simplifying the ro…
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/23 10:36 AM
4

The right fit is always there, but I will say that you need to honestly evaluate the amount of time you’ll be able to invest into a relationship given what you’ve described. Bodybuilding AND excelling in your career often don’t leave time for much else, therefore I don’t see the purpose in seeking out traditionally-geared relationships. I think that is where the issue is coming in, personally. My husband and I have hobbies, but we run a business together, and I am very dedicated to playing a sup…
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/23 01:48 AM
10

When I was dating, I always offered to pay for my half of things. No man ever accepted this offer but I think it’s polite to make it. First date means you are essentially strangers. I think I just wouldn’t go on a second date if they had taken me up on the offer. Whoever asks for the date SHOULD pay, and I never initiated dates. That being said, I went with my gut a lot dating and I felt entitled to be picky. Guys that take long to respond, play games, cancel dates… I moved on. The only man who …
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/23 02:23 AM
2

My husband enjoys gaming as a pastime. I wont lie, I enjoy that he has a hobby that keeps him at home. I feel lucky and do my best to support him/give him this private time. That being said… If he neglected our future and our relationship consistently in favor of gaming, that would absolutely be an issue. I am unsure of what you can do to remedy this aside from frank conversation. He is displaying a lack of discipline that is troubling to see in a husband
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/23 04:12 PM
5

Bluntly, but pick your battles and understand you are not perfect either. I address things like this with my husband kind of like this, “You know that I appreciate and love so much of what you do, but I feel disappointed/disrespected when you do X, can we talk about this?” And then leave room for discussion to hear his point of view and come to a solution/compromise.
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/23 02:41 PM
–

My husband and I don’t really believe in having non-mutual friends of the opposite sex. That being said, I don’t know if this sub is a great place to ask this question given the cultural context. I am American, my husband is Brazilian.
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/23 04:52 PM
7

Wasting your time on this one. This isn’t leading to a productive and healthy marriage. Let him go, he doesn’t sound like much of a prize if his discipline is so weak.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/23 02:50 AM
31

I agree 🤷‍♀️ It goes both ways too. Women waste time just to avoid being alone and if they’re constantly nagging/dragging a man down/not supporting him in feminine ways, they’re likely just using him until they find something better. It’s human nature. My husband immediately, not even six months into us dating, was discussing how he intended to marry me. We immediately upon dating had casual discussions about our shared values and dreams for the future. If a man or woman isn’t giving you those t…
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/23 09:51 PM
9

I think it’s easy to say that upon reflection. I will say I felt an attachment/attraction to my husband from day 1 that I never felt with any other guy before. He made my days happier, everything was doable knowing I would get to see him at the end of the day. But being so in love with him now for 5 years, it’s difficult to honestly look back at the beginning and gauge my true feelings. I think it was the beginnings of love at first sight, but who’s to say. My husband says the same kinds of thin…
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/23 03:51 PM
2

You can display your virtues in brief windows when dating. But don’t be a wife to a man who hasn’t married you. Focus on your own life and communicate clearly and sternly what your values are. Also be wary of the men you are choosing. Something is awry in your selection. Don’t focus solely on physical attraction. They can be successful, but I think it is better to find a man on his way to success that you can help build (again, once married). And do not trust to the point where you have no bound…
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/23 02:44 PM
2

A mature outlook like this yields equally mature relationships, couldn’t agree more.
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/23 12:32 AM
17

I didn’t want to say it but I think you’re 100% on point. To find it dirty and repulsive seems like an issue with control that should be sorted in therapy. I was trying to gently state it with “focus on my own issues in my outlook” but I think its better to state it outright as you have.
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/23 08:07 PM
33

Might get hate for this. But personally, I think it’s very immature of a man or a woman to think body hair is disgusting on their longterm partner. My husband and I shave regularly, though I prefer he has body hair as I find it much more masculine, but neither is disgusted by the other if there’s a lapse in that preference. We also help one another shave, especially now that I am pregnant. Our attraction to one another never dramatically changes as long as we’re clean and healthy because we love…
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/23 06:53 PM
3

I write notes and make cards for my husband, I have since we started dating. I will set up his favorite snacks and a little note/cheesy homemade card around his PC (he’s a gamer) for when he gets home from work.
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/23 01:52 AM
5

Personally I figure if my husband doesn’t like it, he wouldn’t have married it. I don’t stare at my body in the mirror a lot. But I am naked with my husband or partially clothed almost daily. I would just say to stop scrutinizing yourself and desensitize yourself to it by maybe cleaning in your bra and underwear or something. Even super models have flaws, and your partner clearly likes yours.
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/23 11:02 PM
1

Me. I started practicing discipline in all areas of my life. Make a daily cleaning schedule. Mornings: Kitchen reset, make your bed, straighten misc out of place items from the day before Afternoons: Touch up the bathrooms and do the laundry to keep caught up Evenings: Sweep the floors, mop if needed, make and clean up after dinner I have a bigger schedule for deeper cleans. I mostly add them as needed. Like for example I need to clean windows this week, so I will set aside a day to dust blinds …
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/23 03:21 PM
2

You labeled it as such because that’s what it was. A sugar relationship. If he is this uncomfortable with what you do for work and you are unwilling to give it up, and he is unwilling to change his outlook, I am unsure of why you would think marriage is a good idea. This seems like a difference in values that’s important to address seriously. Either he is criticizing you for no reason because he enjoys emotionally abusing you, or he is criticizing you for valid reasons in response to things you …
/r/RedPillWomen13/05/23 11:14 AM
1

It’s a bit difficult to say without knowing your body type! I say try things on and see what makes you feel happiest. Personally, I opt for high-waisted silhouettes. I have shorter legs, wide hips, and am bottom heavy. I am not overweight by any means, but I do lift weights and am naturally more hourglass shaped. So high waisted pants are a must and I either tuck my shirt in, or am careful to avoid long/flowy tops that drown me and make me look frumpy and large. I love dresses, especially now th…
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/23 12:54 PM
5

Honestly, you having two girls young enough to not remember him is more reason to leave, not more reason to stay. RPW don’t advocate for continuing a marriage where abuse is present. Your girls will become targets eventually. Record his instability from here on out and stay away. The next time he is violent will need a police report. He may escalate. Stay safe.
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/23 10:41 AM
8

I don’t see any good future in getting into something like that. If a man wants my time and company, he better commit to me. I wouldn’t waste my time on someone sure enough to want to bed and date me, but not sure enough to be exclusively with me for any extended period of time. Reeks of weakness and uncertainty to me. Even if he does commit eventually, I think it’s indicative of mental weakness that will likely cause issues later on.
/r/RedPillWomen11/05/23 01:34 AM
4

Unpopular opinion (and granted it’s been five years since I dated), but I loved online dating for this reason. My expectations scared off the majority and the ones that stuck around.. Easier to read the bullshitters for me after some time spent talking. Had a few wasted dates of course which is always depressing, but a much better pool than cold approach types in my experience.
/r/RedPillWomen11/05/23 12:43 AM
1

You have options before you get married. Once you choose to start a family, you’ve chosen from your options and now you are committing yourself to becoming a leader and father. It absolutely has to do with discipline. “Getting women” is easy if you have half a brain and an ounce of charisma. Has nothing to do with being disciplined in life.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/23 07:26 PM
6

I also think that insecure men often cheat/self-sabotage. I think asking for occasional support from a partner with these things is to be expected, but to put that burden onto someone else consistently is a sign of a weakness that needs to be worked on personally, through therapy or other forms of self help. This goes for men and women. Attempting to feminize yourself within the relationship is good. It’s always good to look to improve yourself because that is what you can control. Just make sur…
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/23 02:46 PM
1

In that case, you need to ask yourself why you continue to waste time on him and if this is even a future you want anymore.
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/23 01:49 PM
10

Ah I remember you from your last post about marriage and how he didn’t read your mind about proposing months early to you. You didn’t seem very open to criticism/being shown the faults in your thinking then and I am unsure as to whether this group aligns with your values. It’s fine if you don’t agree with the values of this group, but I am not sure you’ll find tons of sympathy over crying yourself to sleep over a forgotten birthday rather than communicating here. That being said, we need more in…
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/23 11:20 AM
5

I mean withholding is different from consenting. If I am sick (currently pregnant), I am not gonna pretend to enjoy sex and my husband wouldn’t want me to. Declining sex now and then is still not an excuse for a man to be so undisciplined. I have a very strong, provider-type, masculine husband who still treats me as his safe place/home and treats me as such, because that’s what a wife is supposed to be for a good man. And now that we are having a daughter, the way that he treats me has become ev…
/r/RedPillWomen06/05/23 10:45 PM
23

Complete nonsense. If a man lacks discipline it makes them less of a man. Cheating on their partner and mother of their children shows a lack of discipline and therefore a bad example of leadership and masculinity for his family.
/r/RedPillWomen06/05/23 04:57 AM
34

Ehhh I initiate through non aggressive action (like touch, kissing, other non verbal cues), but my husband and I have great communication. He knows he can say no if he’s feeling tired/not in the mood and I won’t punish him by getting angry and displaying wounded pride. He works a physically demanding job and sometimes he benefits more from a massage and that’s fine with me. I do think it’s important to show your man that you’re attracted to them, but that doesn’t always have to be through sex.
/r/RedPillWomen03/05/23 03:03 AM
13

Possible, but extremely unlikely. Most men who want a traditional lifestyle also want children. I was a SAHW for less than a year, and now I am 5 months pregnant. In all honesty, I couldn’t be a SAHW alone longterm as there (and I might get backlash for this) simply isn’t enough housework with no kids and two pets to keep me occupied full time. My hands were too idle and it wasn’t good for my mental health. Most people struggle mentally if they aren’t doing much work, believe it or not. The hous…
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/23 02:24 PM
5

Super immature. Red flag for emotional manipulation. I wouldn’t waste time on a guy like that.
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/23 01:00 PM
2

You two need to discuss it. My husband was a contractor when we met at age 19. He and I wanted the same things for our future: me to be dedicated to the kids as we both had SAHMs raising us, and him to be the provider, with traditional roles for our lives. I worked different okay-paying jobs until last year when we decided we wanted to have our first child. We have been building a construction business together now. My husband is now qualified as a general contractor. I market our business and c…
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/23 11:01 PM
6

I live in an area where marrying young is also looked down upon. But I knew from a young age what I wanted my life to look like. I was an intelligent kid - dual enrollment, honor student, the whole thing. Still got married at age 20. We did marry at the courthouse and used $5k to travel and visit my husbands family for a month, but that is just because I never cared much for a big wedding. Now 25, pregnant with my first child and not working outside the home anymore. My husband and I run our own…
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/23 03:06 PM
31

I don’t think like this. I am traditional, from a broken home, and I find strength within myself, pulled from my desire to break the cycle for myself and my children. I am pregnant with my first child now and I find even more peace in this than ever. No one on either side of my family stuck together healthily. I wont repeat that, I need to give a new example to my kids. My husband and I both work to provide that for them.
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/23 12:00 PM
4

I don’t make stand-alone posts here, and I have the subs I am in hidden from my profile. Never had issues with it I guess because of that, knock on wood. We get these posts almost weekly, so if it bothers you I recommend just having a separate account. Unfortunately reddit has gone woke, and it’s only going to get worse.
/r/RedPillWomen20/04/23 11:58 PM
59

No, my husband and I are traditionalists, which means he stopped going out to bars and clubs without me WHEN WE GOT MARRIED. I have strong opinions about men and women who think life should be unchanged when they marry and have children. Now that I am pregnant, he has ONE concert planned in my third trimester. Aside from going to a friends house during the day because I didn’t want to, he hasn’t done frivolous immature shit like that not even while I am pregnant. Fathers are present to lead thei…
/r/RedPillWomen20/04/23 11:57 AM
13

I worked, studied, and had hobbies before getting married. Now being married 5 years, pregnant, and barefoot in the kitchen, I can confirm I am happier than I ever was pursuing a career or messing around with friends in my teen years. I get out of bed without having to force myself because I am motivated to take care of my little family. It makes me happy. I still have hobbies but, this balance is better for me.
/r/RedPillWomen19/04/23 12:11 PM
4

I think it’s a red flag. I also think a woman having very close male friends is a red flag. And the post you found is a red flag too. I think if you’re going to even bother pursuing a man this much older than you, the appeal should be security and maturity along with similar values/interests. Him keeping women he’s slept with around while staying he wants a wife and family reeks of immaturity to me. I wouldn’t waste time with that. Feel free to confront him, but a man of his age isn’t likely to …
/r/RedPillWomen18/04/23 05:00 PM
2

yeah I recommend staying off of TRP. Statistics don’t align with their claims and it’s mostly young unmarried men saying those things. Statistically, women initiate most divorces. If you don’t withhold sex, pick a good man with strong family values, put effort into your appearance, etc. It’s not likely a good husband will leave you for a younger woman. Men aren’t all emotionless monsters who don’t care about their life partners emotions.
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/23 04:00 PM
3

The same can be said of people who have left any religion honestly. There are online stories of all faiths having people like this. I think you should break up with him if you view him as less than because of his faith. That is a symptom of your prejudice. Nothing else. I stand by what I said in the original post. Expecting to keep children completely disconnected from half of their family background is ignorant. They can have your cultural influence and his. It’s 2023. You got extremely defensi…
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/23 02:16 PM
17

I sympathized with you until you wanted to jump ship and get with an older, richer, established man. You have an excellent man from what it sounds like. As women, I think it is our job to build a man up. It’s our natural role. Even a rich man, you can encourage to be better. The best security down the line is the loyalty a man will give you for standing by him through everything. As for religion, I think it’s unrealistic to expect your future children to not be introduced to his faith and cultur…
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/23 12:44 PM
3

Wow, a lot to unpack here. Simple response though. If you don’t find value in being a wife and mother, don’t pursue it. If you don’t trust your husband and he doesn’t understand the trust you are putting into him by becoming his wife and mother of his children, do not marry him. What you’ve described is the worst possible outcome, not the probable one. Either you just came to troll on RPW, or you spend too much time on TRP.
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/23 12:11 PM
3

I can tell you it’s very difficult for a woman to bulk at the gym. Unless you’re consuming growth hormones or drinking 2 giant protein shakes per day, it’s extremely unlikely that you’ll develop large muscles. I have lifted for 5 years now and my muscles actually make me look slimmer, especially the arm muscles, they make my arms look smaller and tighter. My waist is much smaller and I genetically have big glutes and thighs but they look much better toned. I was afraid of bulking my arms too muc…
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/23 01:32 AM
3

It’s alright, I get where you’re coming from. I want to be a bit harsh with you because I also had an ED and your post set off all of the alarm bells. You don’t need to lose more weight. Trust the BMI scale. Something that helped me when I was young was weight lifting. Eat a lot of protein, make sure you’re getting your calories in, and build muscle. It will make your entire body feel tighter and look good without weight loss feeling like the only control you can exercise here. EDs are about a n…
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/23 01:11 AM
5

I don’t track things by BMI. Most just weigh themselves. My doctor says I am of healthy BMI I guess but I couldn’t just spout off what that would be from the top of my head. I say this as someone who is absolutely anti fat acceptance and I do not believe in health at every size or any of that nonsense but judging from your photos, you would look sickly if you lost anymore weight. And judging from the way you phrased this, it seems you are fishing for compliments or for people to tell you “you’re…
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/23 12:29 AM
9

As someone who is mentally ill and had a genetic predisposition, as well as a bad upbringing and home life, I think medication is too often given as an only resort. I am glad to be alive. I have stability now as an adult because I carved it out for myself. Many mental illnesses can be treated through healthy coping mechanisms, diet, exercise, healthy lifestyle choices, and self awareness. That is why I prefer a psychologist to a psychiatrist any day. Medication should be a therapy aid, not a rep…
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/23 10:24 PM
2

I would cut ties and look elsewhere. You’re both too old for that kind of behavior. That is a major red flag and extremely disrespectful, and it’s likely not going to change seeing as he’s 29. Also being long distance at your age, if you want children, is a bad judgement call. My husband and I never disrespect one another by openly goggling at pretty people. We both cleaned OUT our socials (or deleted them) when we got engaged. It’s not unusual to want the respect that you want. I guarantee ther…
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/23 09:34 PM
3

Men do not often think like this. Being realistic. I still stand by the other points made in my comment as well.
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/23 02:08 PM
16

God you’re kind of insufferable the more you context you give. Stop making excuses for yourself. Look yourself in the mirror and say, “I have deep issues that are 100% my fault and if I do not fix them right now, my relationship and happiness will suffer.” That’s it. Only your mommy and daddy care about the constant excuses. You are a grown woman now. If you’re unhappy with your weight, start eating healthy and working out now. I lost 70 lbs age 18. It took over a year to achieve. Better start n…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/23 10:55 PM
9

That’s how a child would think about it. Again, you lied and should apologize. He has a right to have his trust damaged by your lies. You don’t have the ability to control how he feels about your mistakes like this. It’s unhealthy and I won’t tell you it’s a good idea. Facing uncomfortable mistakes maturely is always the best course of action. “I lied to you about my use of your location and I realize now that it’s wrong and it felt wrong to keep lying to you. I am working on my trust issues and…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/23 08:24 PM
6

You ignored the more important points of my post that you found more difficult to argue. Accepting criticism is something you need to work on alongside your self esteem. The crux of the issue is you lied to him. You told him you wanted something for safety purposes when in reality you want to use it for trust issues and track his location when he goes out. My husband and I shared locations in the beginning and were very open about BOTH of our desires to build trust using that feature. That is th…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/23 07:57 PM
6

You changing your behavior, likely one of the reasons he loves you as a man, is bizarre to me. Very counterproductive. Also do not let outsiders into your relationship like this. Airing your dirty laundry like this poisons the well and you can see what it’s doing to you: creating unnecessary anxiety and placing your relationship under stress. The time in which he agreed to marry you has not passed yet. You stated yourself he was working on something that literally kept him up all night. When is …
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/23 07:38 PM
6

Yes because you are dishonest about why you want it. When I am insecure with my husband, I say that. I don’t say “but it’s for your safety!” because that’s nuts. I say, “I trust you most of the time but sometimes I have doubts because you’re so beautiful to me that I don’t believe that other women don’t see it too when I am not around.” That being said, when we got married he stopped going out to bars and clubs and places where people usually only have sex on the mind. We both don’t do those thi…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/23 07:23 PM
12

Hard disagree. I am married now but I never made my husband feel like he wasn’t important to me. I wasn’t desperately begging for his constant attention, but I made it clear he was a priority when he needed me. Even before we started dating. Men like to feel important and like you’re interested. If he isn’t responding to you, it’s likely that he just isn’t interested himself.
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/23 04:10 PM
1

People loveeee to virtue signal over Shein from their smartphones, don’t they? 😂 Great response.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/23 11:03 PM
-4

Im sorry this happened to you. Just be sure that you end things with him here. This is a major red flag. It sounds like he is the type to be obsessive, possessive, and therefore has a higher potential for violence. What he did is not normal. Do not go back. Move on, please. Also, if he has an issue with your body count that isn’t going to go away. Go find a man who sees no issue in it. There’s no point in pursuing a man who’s obviously making you feel disgusting for something you cannot change. …
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/23 12:38 PM
10

Say that you’re living off of investments and running a small not yet profitable business. And when the conversation of values and future goals comes up, make it clear you’re a traditionalist and would prefer traditional gender roles in the future. I worked for 4/5 years of my marriage so far, but recently stopped because my husband and I always discussed that it was important to both of us for me to be at home for our children once we had them. Now that I am pregnant, it was time for me to stop…
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/23 03:32 AM
15

Personally my husband and I spoke of our boundaries before marrying. He doesn’t go to clubs, strip or otherwise, without me, as he would not want me to do similar things without him. We still fulfill traditional roles. I advise just speaking about it calmly now. Once pregnant (I am pregnant now), it is likely to bother you more. It is perfectly masculine to leave this stage of life behind him as he plans to become a man and father. I would argue it’s more masculine to exercise such discipline an…
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/23 07:02 PM
3

There’s free groups that offer these kinds of things on Facebook 😂 I joined one on Facebook and chatted with a Brazilian girl. I needed to learn better Português and she needed to learn better English. Again, it was free. You might want to come up with a new plan for paying your tuition. Also why is this being posted in this group?
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/23 05:35 PM
9

I get where you’re coming from but as a woman I see this main issue: people are getting an overinflated sense of self worth from social media. Being confident is fine. But realistically knowing where you stand with all of your flaws and accepting that is so much better and more confident than being like “I am a 10 and that’s what I deserve!” Most men would have to “settle” in order to be with you monogamously if you choose to view things like that. What you want should always be commitment and t…
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/23 11:49 AM
5

Don’t meet men online unless they’re in your area and willing to meet up eventually. Especially don’t meet men on Reddit. I agree that your reaction here was a bit out of place. Speaking to someone online via chat, even for a month, is very different from dating and knowing someone.
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/23 09:48 PM
2

Run. That’s a major red flag. You are young. Keep your body count low and find a man who finds it effortless to be monogamous. He sounds immature, that’s the reality here. He isn’t ready to settle down. You can find a man who won’t cheat on you down the line. He 100% will do that. The chance of him NOT cheating after openly having these thoughts is extremely slim. Don’t waste your prime waiting for it to happen.
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/23 09:25 PM
2

I wasted a few months on a guy like that in the past. Flash forward to meeting my husband… He had a very physically demanding job with long hours. He would still respond to me QUICKLY, and when he took a few hours he would apologize and explain that he had to be away from his phone working. I played hard to get after being the quick responder in the past and getting hurt, I would take like 5 hours to answer him sometimes, and he would shamelessly respond within minutes anyways. Now we laugh abou…
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/23 02:35 PM
6

I lost weight at age 19 after being overweight/obese my entire life. I also struggled with binging. It is definitely an emotional thing and you need to find comfort in other hobbies to replace that with. You can’t outrun a bad diet. Start practicing discipline. Set alarms on your phone. At X time I need to go workout. Home workouts on Youtube can be great to start with! No travel time, takes 30 min - 1 hour. Set a minimum time for yourself of 30 min. You can quit after that but you can sacrifice…
/r/RedPillWomen23/03/23 09:16 PM
6

I used to dress more revealing as well. I am pregnant with a daughter and it caused me to reevaluate the kind of example I want to set. I am wanting to move more towards modesty as well. Good thing my bump finally is showing now so I have a good excuse to buy new dresses 😅
/r/RedPillWomen23/03/23 09:01 PM
3

I think it depends what you want from life. I wanted a family and a husband. If you don’t want that (which is perfectly okay), I think waiting is fine. But I won’t sugar coat it. Waiting until your 30s to find a husband and get married AND have children is hard. Relationships take a few years to get to marriage usually. Past 35 pregnancy is harder on your body, you’re considered high risk, and (though it isn’t true for everyone) many experience fertility issues past that age, which can often req…
/r/RedPillWomen23/03/23 02:39 PM
2

We all have things that make us more or less appealing. Thankfully men vary as much as we do. Just focus on becoming the best woman and mother you can be and you will find the right fit for you.
/r/RedPillWomen23/03/23 12:24 PM
9

If your businesses are doing very well, a virtual assistant may be needed for the sake of your marriage. I don’t think there’s a way to balance the two realms reasonably without help, and at the end of the day, I think marriage is more important in the longterm. You don’t want to neglect a life partner for a season of said life to the point where you may lose them. Consider hiring help and setting strict working hours for yourself. Schedule time with your husband as you would schedule time for y…
/r/RedPillWomen22/03/23 03:03 PM
40

Remote work. Look into remote data entry or remote customer service positions. I worked with an electrical company taking phone calls and was able to do so remotely after training. You can also work night shifts for remote customer service work. I had a shift from 6 am - 2 pm. Others did overnight.
/r/RedPillWomen17/03/23 09:07 PM
24

Sounds like a baby rather than a man. Personally if that is the way he reacts regularly to minor conflicts and boundaries, I would be wary to waste more time on him.
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/23 02:02 AM
2

I married at 20, and am now 25. I won’t pretend to be an expert but if I had to give advice, we figured out some things along the way. Though I will admit that we are traditionalists, which does influence things. I handle the household work, am currently not working outside of the home as we are pregnant and we knew early on that once we began having children, I would quit my job. He handles our business, allocating tasks to me to help with the business when needed, etc. General advice though! D…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/23 07:01 PM
2

It just means that it’s difficult to focus on your own happiness and relinquish control when you’re worried about the fallout when you do. Setting a boundary with the car situation is fine. As I said, I do not know anything aside from your post details. So you know better than me. But it’s something to keep in mind, as I would be rightfully angry if my husband damaged, even slightly, my car multiple times when he used it. It would make me less trusting in his ability to take the reigns, which wo…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/23 06:31 PM
8

My husband has never scratched my car to be honest. I was in a hit and run before while inside a Target when I first got my nice adult car, but I haven’t had any minor accidents that were my fault since I was a teen. You said yourself that you feel he isn’t a good driver, so I don’t see why you’re now trying to backtrack on that. Understanding your issues with control is great. I am just going off of the information provided here. Not every man is built for this type of thinking and lifestyle. B…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/23 05:49 PM
8

Don’t let him drive your car. A man worthy of relinquishing control to should be capable of getting his own car. “Giving him” control over your chosen household chores seems a bit patronizing, like you aren’t actually willing to relinquish control to him at all. Best to ask yourself seriously if he’s responsible enough as a man for this kind of thinking in the first place. Daydreaming behind the wheel and multiple minor car accidents and no car of his own feel like red flags to me if this is tru…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/23 02:16 PM
22

Plenty of good men that you can see face to face regularly. LDRs don’t work and real partners don’t beg you to take them back desperately until you relent unless they’re pathetic. Leave him in the past and find a real man who is ready to build a life with you.
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/23 04:02 AM
7

both
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/23 04:07 AM
6

I don’t agree with OP but many states do not require the rigorous screening anymore to begin medical transition. It can be as easy as a 30 min psych eval before they’re willing to cut a young woman’s breasts off nowadays. Scary times.
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/23 03:03 AM
6

Don’t look for good men in bars. I will never understand why women do this. Finding a good husband in a bar is like winning the lottery.
/r/RedPillWomen07/03/23 01:27 PM
0

Personally, I would calmly bring it up and make a boundary. If he doesn’t follow it, move on. It’s early. You two aren’t in love yet, it’s infatuation. But approach the subject with logical and be calm, don’t cry and be emotional about it. Figure out what you want to say beforehand. “I noticed you doing this, I appreciate how open you are with your social media, but it makes me uncomfortable and undermines my trust early in the relationship. I need to know what we can do moving forward to compro…
/r/RedPillWomen07/03/23 01:21 PM
4

I do. I cook, clean, grow our child, and take up a supportive role. My husband is the financial provider and does manual labor as needed around the house. When it comes to the function of the home (ie home improvement, budgeting, food plans, child rearing, etc), I take charge. When it comes to overall life direction (moving for his career, certain values he requires we instill in our future children, etc) he takes charge. It feels natural and balanced. We both discuss things privately in our roo…
/r/RedPillWomen07/03/23 12:59 AM
1

The thing is you’re not unattractive though. Hence why I think this obsession is unhealthy. I really am not the type to blow smoke up someones ass. I know I am a solid 7, you know? I am being real with you. You aren’t ugly by any means. You look healthy and not old whatsoever.
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/23 07:22 PM
2

Crept on you and it seems you’re obsessing too harshly. You look normal for your age. This didn’t happen overnight. It seems you are obsessing over it suddenly which is a symptom of a greater underlying mental health issue that should be addressed professionally. Men would not consider you old. However, having obsessive tendencies like you’re displaying here would be a turn off. Try enriching your life. Volunteer some place that means something to you. Help other living things. Get into a group …
/r/RedPillWomen01/03/23 04:22 AM
5

My husband and I married when I was 20, he was 21. we celebrate our 5th anniversary in a few months and are pregnant with our first child. It’s rare to find traditional men in their early 20s if you look for them at bars, gyms, etc. My husband and I met online, but what drew me to him was his open devotion to me. He never played games, or tried to appear aloof. Even if I took hours to respond, he would answer me within minutes. He was and still is close to his family and his faith. He made it cl…
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/23 02:13 AM
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