TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

justanotherusername4 Archive

View 4 posts and 111 comments by justanotherusername4 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
14

This. is. not. about. a. table. As long as you think it is, you don't get it.
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/17 01:22 PM
1

Tell him what you would like in the relationship and ask him what he would like. If there is a match, pursue it. If not, well... you'd have your answer.
/r/RedPillWomen15/10/17 09:36 PM
5

Could be, yes.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 07:03 PM
1

If he respects you more for breaking up that effect will be nulled when you guys get back together. I really don't think it is wise to act very 'red pill' to someone who doesn't appear to be captain material. Sorry.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 07:01 PM
39

I'm sure there can be made an argument about this but I feel this one example can hardly be named a trend by itself. My first impulse when reading your post was that she may be very overwhelmed, tired and maybe even suffering from post natal depression?
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/17 06:58 PM
2

My condolences, sorry about the loss. Feel free to check my post history, my husband and me also had to deal with a loss and grief a while back. A lot of good things were said in the comments there, maybe they help you.
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 07:36 PM
1

I have the feeling it is just a new label on something that has been around for a long time. On the site they make a point of trying to be different from D/s (Dominant/submissive) or DD (Domestic Discipline) relationships, but I don't feel they are right about that, nor that another label is needed. All relationships are different. If you take 5 D/s relationships, you have 5 different relationships. Same with DD. All in all my take is that if you are interested in this, you like the idea of span…
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/17 10:41 AM
1

To me, this isn't about if he is good to be with or not, but about compatibility. Are you happy being with someone you only see once a month? Does the LDR work for you? Does it work for him? Is there room in his life for a relationship? Do you have the same priorities? I'd say be clear about your needs and communicate openly with him.
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/17 06:02 PM
9

What exactly is your problem? You seem to be bashing every other OP on NSFW topics according to your post history, trying to be hurtful and rude, without contributing to the post itself. Projecting, much?
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/17 02:25 PM
3

Long shot coming in: is his attitude the result of how he is raised? Is the message he got from his father that he needs a respectable job because that is what a man does? Maybe it's fear that is holding him back. Try asking him: "If you had a million dollars, what would you do (for a living)?". How would you feel if he quit his job? Would you leave him or encourage him? If it's the latter, tell him that. Maybe he is looking for your approval.
/r/RedPillWomen30/06/17 09:56 PM
1

Try journalling and meditation to figure out what you are feeling when.
/r/RedPillWomen19/06/17 09:36 AM
3

Wow, I'm sorry this happened to you and glad you "nope'd out of there" (love the way you phrased that!). Maybe this is not what you want to hear but I'm genuinely curious if your ex did an actual 180 OR that there were some signs you have missed. Hindsight is 20/20, it would be good to try and figure out if there were flags you didn't see earlier. It would be good for your confidence as well I think, because I can imagine you would have a hard time placing your trust in a potential mate after th…
/r/RedPillWomen19/06/17 09:28 AM
5

When I just met my SO we went on a boating trip and I had to go to the bathroom. The boat didn't have a toilet and it was way too cold to jump in the water. I ended up peeing in a plastic container, handed it to him trough a hatch and he poured the contents overboard. I gave birth twice with him next to me. We've had lengthy discussions about the color of our babies poop. When we moved into our current house we didn't have doors so going to the bathroom wasn't done in private. And sex can be mes…
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/17 09:00 AM
1

Sorry in advance if I'm going Dr. Phil on you. His reaction invokes an emotion in you and you find that hard to handle (understandibly). Please don't try and walk on eggshells. Trying not to make him upset is not the solution here. How do you react when he gets like this? This tells you something important. It is quite possible that the way you react to him is something that you came up with YEARS ago. Looking back, does your reaction now and that feeling of being alone mirror a feeling from whe…
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/17 10:23 AM
5

I have little information to go on regarding your ages, marital status etc, but I'll give it a go. First things first: is it possible that you are having a post partum depression? If you doubt that, please go see a doctor. It doesn't have to be like this, it can (and will) get better. Only read the rest of my post if you are positive you are not having a depression. Now, with that out of the way. Be honest with yourself: if it weren't for your son, would you date this man? A husband is not a dut…
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/17 10:12 AM
1

Would texting work better for him/you?
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/17 10:20 AM
3

*Thank you for doing *You did a really good job on *Can you help me with *I'd like your opinion on *I love when you *You make me feel safe when *You make me feel beautiful when *You make me feel loved when
/r/RedPillWomen03/06/17 01:00 PM
8

I wanted to respond to your post but after reading how you interact with others on this thread here, I'm kinda done. You sound like you are in a bad place with a vile attitude at the moment, and while I'm sorry about that, maybe you should refrain from bitching here and come back when you actually want to listen to the people who take the time to respond to you.
/r/RedPillWomen03/06/17 12:56 PM
2

What did you like to do as a child? Try to incorporate those activities and find like-minded people, IRL or online to start with. Forums on a specific topic (cooking, crocheting, drawing) tend to be very social places and also often organise meetups.
/r/RedPillWomen03/06/17 12:52 PM
1

2nd, very good response. May I just add a suggestion about the lists. Try formulating everything as a positive. It's easier to know what you DO need to do than to AVOID something, behaviour wise. So I'd suggest writing "ask something only once" instead of "no nagging" and "be soft & STFU" instead of "don't be aggressive"
/r/RedPillWomen03/06/17 12:49 PM
2

I can't keep up with being fake laughy and talking a lot, it's not me Then don't. Try to be as authentic as possible when interacting with people. Pretending to be someone you are not can be really draining. I know that's easier said than done, though. I just can't find girlfriends I can get along with One thing I've learned over the years is that most people are actually nice, if you give them a chance. Try to avoid going about it with a Tinder-mentality (nope...nope....nope...nope... you get t…
/r/RedPillWomen03/06/17 12:41 PM
11

This. Responding to him will not fix anything except maybe a bit of ego. Not worth it. Move on and learn from this what you can, so you won't make the same mistakes again.
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/17 05:17 PM
2

Try this video and try to keep an open mind.
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/17 12:46 PM
4

Yes, I agree on this. Arrange for the kids to be away for a weekend and have a sit down with your husband. Get everything on the table. You need all the information before you can decide how to proceed. You cannot have sex with him now, you -quite literally- don't know where he's been. If he refuses to give answers, leave. If he refuses to be honest, leave. Tell him beforehand about this. You can only make the decision to stay if you know all the facts.
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/17 12:36 PM
1

If I take your wish to be more feminine as a given I feel there could be two causes to this. Either/or, possibly both. The tomboyish casual style is part of your identity, so changing that feels like betraying or losing a part of yourself. You have repressed your femininity. It can be that you somehow resent the feminine figures in your life, or are brought up on resenting femininity, or are/were surrounded by peers who resent femininity. If you wish to overcome 1. I suggest you take a look at w…
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/17 12:25 PM
1

I really don't understand the problem here. You need to calm yourself down, instead of being dismissive of your boyfriend. Why is he the Boy Who Cried Wolf because YOU are impatient?
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/17 09:06 AM
3

Feels like you need to start being YOU. Spend time with yourself. You are at a crossroads now. Your anger may feel annoying but it can actually be a good thing. You may be experiencing "growing pains"; realising people you looked up to don't know the answers themselves. That hurts, yes. But it can actually turn out to be a good thing. Get a clear picture of who YOU want to be and work to be that person. Also get a clear picture of who you want to be WITH, what kind of relationship you want, and …
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/17 08:33 AM
11

It sounds to me like you are looking for a man to take away your anxiety. No captain can do that. Please don't believe the fairy tale of "If only ..... THEN I'd feel at peace/be happy". It won't happen. If you struggle with anxiety, I suggest you deal with your anxiety head on. (I wish I followed this advice myself. I'm trying to get to the bottom of my anxiety issues right now because I hadn't before.). I also feel you haven't found a passion in your life yet. What makes you tick? What are you …
/r/RedPillWomen16/05/17 10:32 AM
3

You seem like a pendulum swinging from one end completely to the other. There is a lot going on in your life and with you personally right now. I don't think it's a good idea to elope sooner. Please take the time to find a new balance and remember that people around you change as a result of your personal change, but it takes more time. If you find new steady ground in your personality, take note on how your SO reacts. Wait for him to find his balance too. And then you can decide to get married.
/r/RedPillWomen03/05/17 07:03 PM
1

Thank you. Sorry for your loss.
/r/RedPillWomen19/04/17 08:20 AM
1

Thank you for taking the time to read my post and to respond. I'll make sure to let him know that I love him, care about him and that I'm here for him.
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/17 06:31 PM
1

Okay, I see. Maybe these suggestions will help then: Could it be that on the date you are giving off positive vibes to the guy, he thinks you're all cool with him and is taken aback by your text later? In that case maybe you could be more transparant in the cues you are giving during the date. If (if. idk if you are) you are on your best behaviour on the date, being flirty and positive despite seeing red flags I can somewhat understand the guy being 'wtf? I thought we hit it off' when you declin…
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/17 05:42 PM
–

You mean you've seen all these in the men you date?
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/17 03:45 PM
1

Thank you, fellow INFJ :) You are right, I don't want him to worry about me too. He has enough to deal with as it is.
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/17 01:30 PM
1

Thank you, I'll take on the suggestions you've made. I am considering hiring someone to help with the housework. I've never done this before but I have to be realistic. I do need help right now.
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/17 01:29 PM
1

Thank you for your response and for introducing me to the concepts of face to face / shoulder to shoulder. I've never thought about it this way. We are going on a sailing trip next week, this could be an excellent shoulder to shoulder activity.
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/17 01:26 PM
–

I'm wondering what you consider to be red flags as you seem to encounter them a lot. Can you elaborate?
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/17 01:16 PM
1

Tell him, confess you are insecure about your body AND go for it with confidence and enthusiasm.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/17 07:39 AM
–

Like this? Seriously though, I do like the analogy. A cat can be gracious, soft, warm, supportive, responsive and loving. Great characteristics for a wife!
/r/RedPillWomen10/03/17 05:31 PM
8

You do realise that by not writing about the article but instead linking to it in a clickbait you won't believe what Buzzfeed did now! manner, you are enabling them in generating clicks? I'm not clicking.
/r/RedPillWomen08/03/17 10:58 PM
5

Exercise can prompt you to eat more calories to make up for your exhaustion, and eating at a caloric surplus is making you gain weight. This. As for favourite exercises, I'm new to having a kettlebell and I like it. I am trying to get in the habit of doing 50 swings daily, before bedtime, mostly because I don't have time any other part of the day and I want to be alone when I do it. But I often go to bed too late and too tired, so I need to be better at that.
/r/RedPillWomen02/02/17 07:50 PM
2

In this day and age education can cost you dearly but learning does not. Make a list of skills you feel you need, then learn them. You have the entire internet as a resource. If you are worried you can't make enough money to support a family, be more frugal, downsize and/or move to a cheaper location. But maybe getting by isn't the problem, but being your version of "successful" (whatever that may be) is.
/r/RedPillWomen02/02/17 07:09 PM
2

Disclaimer: I've found that in order for these strengths to be prevalent, I need to be healthy, well rested, relaxed. They get clouded easily. Writing this down helped me realise I need to practice better self care, so my loved ones can benefit from these: I can deeply understand other peoples motives and points of view and I'm able to 'translate' between parties to resolve conflict. I was a mother before I was a mother, so to speak. I care for people, with food, hugs, blankets, cups of tea. I a…
/r/RedPillWomen01/02/17 08:20 AM
2

Another one here! Let's party! Alone! In our houses! ;)
/r/RedPillWomen31/01/17 08:52 PM
1

He kinda sounds.... controlling.... and selfish?
/r/RedPillWomen23/01/17 09:18 PM
1

My take is that you rationally know exactly what's up but your emotions got the best of you, because of your work/living situation.
/r/RedPillWomen23/01/17 09:16 PM
3

Exactly, I feel the same way.
/r/RedPillWomen23/01/17 08:58 PM
3

Keep up the good work! As for: If there’s any suggestions that can be applied to newer relationships for couples who don’t live together, I’m all ears! Are you in a position to online order a meal for him as a surprise? I get that you know when he gets home from work so maybe by ordering a meal delivery for him so he doesn't have to cook, on a day where he has let you know he is stressed out? Would that work?
/r/RedPillWomen23/01/17 08:45 PM
3

I don't think it matters if we "get" it or not. If you feel you've disrespected him, say you are sorry and don't do it again.
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/17 07:32 PM
2

but just ended up treating him...maybe like a spoiled child? I must have misread this line, I'm sorry about that. By the way, I love how you reacted to that and how well you worded your feedback to me. I'm keeping your reaction in mind for future use if I may ever need it. Thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/17 06:00 PM
9

I honestly know what I need to do, but something else is totally blocking me from ever improving. and My self-esteem and confidence went down the drain as a result, but I'm improving and I'm working towards building a healthy self-esteem. No, you are not. See above. The only problem is, overall, I'd still be nothing compared to the girls who were born into this. This is your pitfall. You seem to have the core belief that you will never "get there" because of your past. You seem to have a fixed m…
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/17 09:52 AM
1

Socially awkward, insecure and shy, definitely.
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/17 12:14 AM
1

I'm sorry, you lost me.
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/17 12:12 AM
–

I'd say you need to get your "territories" straight. What areas do you want him to step up in, then back out of those. Also, if he does something, NEVER criticise HOW. Or, as my DH would say: "If you don't like how I [ex. fill the dishwasher], go do it yourself from now on." Also also, give him time. He may need to learn how to trust you and step up. If he doesn't and continues to act like "a spoiled child" as you say.... is he really a Captain or are you wishing for him to be?
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/17 12:07 AM
–

How about toxic behaviours of women in relationships, things that drive men away/kill relationships? Or is that too broad?
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/17 12:01 AM
4

My general advice would be to start journalling about all these questions and subjects. Find out what reactions come from your parents/society and decide if you want to ditch or keep them. Write about fear. Write about anger and irritation. When do you feel it? Where does it come from? Is there a pattern? How is it an overreaction? Get to know your emotions. Get to know you. Write about it and then read back and reflect.
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/17 11:56 PM
2

Go on the hockey date, see how it goes. Consider this to be your first "warning sign". If you get another warning, this may not be the right guy to invest yourself in. Edit: phrasing.
/r/RedPillWomen31/12/16 04:02 PM
3

What a great way to start the new year :D Kudos to you!
/r/RedPillWomen31/12/16 03:37 PM
2

First: Please don't have kids as a "present" to your parents! My MIL really wanted to be a grandmother. Unfortunately, she only got to be one for about 2 years. She died of cancer before our second daughter was born. You are only 21. Don't feel bad if you don't want kids now. We have 2 kids. I had my first at 27. I always wanted to be a mom. To illustrate how views can change: Before having kids, I really thought I wanted to be a SAHM. After having the first, I really felt I needed a job outside…
/r/RedPillWomen30/12/16 09:47 AM
4

Great comment! This man, in telling you, (after the first date too!!) that he's intimdated and feels like he'll never measure up, demonstrates a refusal to up his own game. He's asking you to comfort him and tell him that he's good enough as he currently is. I'm a firm believer that couples should challenge eachother to continually improve. It sounds like he's throwing in the towel before the fight has even started Yes. Don't "dumb down", ever! He is probably projecting his problems and insecuri…
/r/RedPillWomen30/12/16 09:20 AM
2

I have a feeling you are not over the first guy yet. I don't think it's a good idea to get too involved in someone else right now. All I hear is rational arguments. He has a great job, makes great money, already has an established life, has owned a house for years, etc. Work on you first, before you get pregnant and feel "stuck" with Mr. Traditional.
/r/RedPillWomen30/12/16 09:11 AM
2

How can I get it into my head to walk into the kitchen, cook a meal from start to finish, and like it enough to do it for my man for my lifetime? You'll set yourself up for failure if you feel you should commit to this for a lifetime. I suggest you adopt the mindset of "what can I cook / do today to feed / nourish / love / respect my man"
/r/RedPillWomen30/12/16 08:55 AM
5

But after a few fights with my mom, I couldn't recapture that feminine energy This seems to be key. You apparently equate being feminine with being like your mom, so you reject both. If you simply copy other women when trying to look for a role model, your femininity won't be authentic and you wouldn't be able to sustain that for very long. If you want to find your own femininity I can recommend this video by Teal Swan: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vzYzFxw8AMU
/r/RedPillWomen23/12/16 10:40 AM
2

"See? This is what you always do" Ugh..... Please don't go there.....
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/16 08:50 AM
5

Transparancy is the antidote to manipulation. My bet is that if you tell him you've been noticing what he tries to do, and that it bothers you, he'll think twice next time. Maybe he won't agree with you at that moment, but he will have heard what you said. Timing and tone of voice are key, of course. You probably don't want to bring this up during an argument.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/16 07:25 PM
1

If you mean beta as opposed to alpha male, don't count on him to tell you. And he doesn't have to. If you feel you should lose some weight, lose some weight.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/16 02:54 PM
1

Give him time. Do what you can to make him feel good. Be available if he needs you. If you sense he needs space, go do something for yourself so he doesn't feel guilty about you.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/16 10:09 PM
1

Okay, then the first step would be to reflect on you actions. Only if you have a clear idea when and how you undermine him you can change this behaviour to something that would strengthen him. Writing it down will force you to really reflect and to see your own actions more clearly. Keep writing about your behaviour and the effects it has on your boyfriend. Sometimes you need to write it down and read it later to see what really happened. And to see the bigger picture. After a while you'll notic…
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/16 09:51 PM
2

Do you feel your boyfriend is a beta male as a result of your behaviour or is that his own personality? You can't change a banana into an apple but if it is a result of your dynamic, and you wish to change it, being aware of HOW you undermine him is a valuable first step. I would suggest writing it down when and how you undermine him. Then, based on what you wrote, pick one or two situations and plan to act different next time. Then do it.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/16 07:54 AM
1

Thank you for elaborating! After reading this I feel it's interesting that this post has been about hierarchy among women. Your OP may have been about clothing but isn't it an interesting parallel that you noticed your post downvoted to the point that you even felt the need to delete it. It appears the same mechanism is at work here online, not with clothing, but with words ;) Diving deeper into that, maybe you have noticed that you are apparently very sensitive to "powerplay". This is more a qu…
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/16 07:47 AM
13

Awww, pity you deleted your original post instead of updating....... :( Now the answers don't make sense to me and/or other readers.
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/16 10:18 PM
1

I decided to move away to chase his dream You knew what you were getting into. Your feelings are valid, you cannot unwant what you want. Get clear the relationship you want. Can you live this life, supporting your man with a 14 hour-a-day job? Making sure he comes home to a nice place with a nice wife? If the answer is no, be honest and move on. You don't need to be miserable for years to come and he doesn't need a miserable wife. If the answer is yes, make changes in your attitute and behaviour…
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/16 08:50 PM
2

Take care of yourself first and as best as you can, like you are already doing. I don't think there is anything you can do to 'fix' him or speed up the recovery process. He has to do this himself. Keep taking care of the basics as you do and take note when he does ask for your help or support. As much as it sucks, probably the best way to go about this is as if you are watching a toddler fall over and letting it get back on his feet on his own. Resisting the urge to "help" can be very hard, but …
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/16 08:33 AM
1

INFJ here. Man is ENTP
/r/RedPillWomen19/04/16 12:15 PM
1

Ok I'm sorry, I might not have any advice but can I just say these work hours seem INSANE to me?? I am not judging, rather surprised. Like, holy S. How is this even sustainable in the long run? I think the only advice I could give is not what you asked for: is this the best possible way to spend his time and life in general? Is het doing what he loves doing most, using his talents, feeding his soul? If not, what are the reasons for working so extremely hard? Making carreer? Earning money? To sus…
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/16 08:33 AM
1

I once heard that subconsciously "daughters will want to marry someone resembling their father and mirror their mother, boys will want to marry someone resembling their mother and mirror their father". In positive as well as negative traits. I don't know to what extend this is true but I am actively aware of this with our two young girls, trying to be the best rolemodel for them and showing them the best sides of their father and how well he takes care of me (us).
/r/RedPillWomen22/03/16 10:19 PM
12

Yeah, like a guy in a hostage situation ;) (blink if you need help!)
/r/RedPillWomen06/02/16 09:16 PM
1

I think how the word ugly is used it covers a huge range, from unkempt appearance to being deformed (by birth defects or scars) to "unlucky genes" (eyes too wide apart, baggy lids, crooked nose etc). But I think what people usually refer to as an ugly woman, as in unattractive, is mainly the unkempt group which is for the most part totally fixable and is very much tied with having the right attitude. So try to work on avoiding the following "traits": being overweight being too skinny being cover…
/r/RedPillWomen28/01/16 08:58 PM
2

I do meditate, but have yet to make it a habit. I get overwhelmed easily and find that in times I need to relax the most, I just don't make time for it. Reading chronic stress can cause lower libido was not a surprise for me but feels like a slap in the face that I REALLY need to take this more seriously. My libido is a huge obstacle in keeping the bedroom alive. So thank you, I needed to hear this.
/r/RedPillWomen27/01/16 09:16 AM
1

Maybe you can do a fun food tasting, where you either make about 4-5 different vegetables (small portions) or 4-5 different recipes (again, small. bitesize) with one vegetable, for him to taste and vote on. The ones he likes best, cook again as a full meal. And given he likes corn - how many different ways of preparing corn do you have in your repetoire? Can you expand on that?
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/16 08:42 PM
1

Great read. I'm glad to say this comes natural to me. (Probably the only area I DON'T need a buttload of work and practice to get better in...)
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/16 08:06 PM
1

I'm having a cold at the moment and also a very stressful time at work. That combination is not doing me any favors. It has been hard for me to keep up the housework, to the point that my house probably now looks after cleaning, as some people's before cleaning. I have definitely come to the realisation that I need to take better care of myself, because I feel my health and energy levels are the biggest bottleneck and standing in the way of being a good wife and mother. Ouch.
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/16 04:17 PM
2

Although we aren't together, we act like we are and that includes being physical. That doesn't sound like you are not together ? Are you sure you broke up OK? If the reasons for breaking up were and still are valid, maybe you should "break up" again. Also I second TempestTcup in that you are not responsible for his loneliness. Get clear on YOUR reasons for breaking up and tell him.
/r/RedPillWomen18/01/16 08:45 PM
15

If you trust your man, you will know he has good intentions and you submit. If you don't trust your man and/or don't feel he has good intentions, you'll have to reevaluate your relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen18/01/16 07:03 PM
5

Rewrite this post into a letter to your husband and give it to him while you go to the gym. Focus on YOU, not him. Your behaviour, thoughts, feelings and worries. Apologize only for how you behaved - not how you feel. Suggest several options to better things and let him choose how to go from here.
/r/RedPillWomen01/01/16 12:51 PM
4

One question, given you are dating as a result of being housemates: would you consider dating him if you met him somewhere else? My opinion after reading your post: I think you are settling for the wrong captain here. Please try to find out why so you can avoid this later on.
/r/RedPillWomen30/12/15 11:51 PM
2

Hmm. From what you wrote it may be that this is the way he has learned to ask for attention, saying "please look at me, please acknowledge me". This was probably one of the surest ways to get his parents to look at him when he was younger, maybe even enhanced by a need to make the little time they had together as light and fun as possible. Of course I don't know for sure. Do you see a pattern in when he behaves like this, other that just being with his mother? Is this his way of asking for your …
/r/RedPillWomen13/12/15 08:50 PM
3

This was a great read! So very often people are unhappy but stay stuck because "this is just who I am, take it or leave it". Sure it is easier to blame other people or situations, but that leaves you powerless and out of control. Enter despair and anger. You on the other hand took control and changed what you could. Rather, are changing what you can, as it is an ongoing process. You know, I work in education and meet a lot of young adults who resemble the "former you". I see it as my mission to …
/r/RedPillWomen05/12/15 12:28 PM
1

You seem to be doing a good job seeing the good in your MIL. Don't worry about feeling annoyed, but do pay attention to it. From your description it seems that maybe you should be clearer in your boundaries and communication. If she offers to help with the cooking, tell her in a gentle way exactly what you would like her do, if it is important to the end result. "Could you cook the green beans for about 8 minutes and then add them to the casserole please?" Also, you wrote My fiance struggles to …
/r/RedPillWomen01/12/15 12:58 PM
1

Amsterdam
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/15 10:47 PM
1

Are you sure you are worried about the financial implications only? The way you talk about this lady in your post gives me the idea that you might be worried about her being close to your husband. Please do not confuse the two. If you are indeed worried about the money side, tell him so (you already did) and let him do his business. If you are covertly jealous, then critisising your man is a bad idea. Be as emotionally safe and available to him, or else you might push him away, possibly creating…
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/15 10:49 AM
1

One of the things I have found to work best for me in times of stress or emotional turmoil is to consiously remember that "it is what it is". If I am feeling anxious or emotional, it doesn't help me if I try to push it away. The feelings are there, as much as I would like them not to be sometimes. Accepting my emotions is still a struggle for me, it is almost like I am brainwashed into believing I shouldn't have them, that I should be happy or content or cheerful all the time. But reality is tha…
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/15 08:47 PM
1

I've always wondered what that means exactly. Can you elaborate on how that works? Is that visible to others and if so, how?
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/15 12:55 PM
5

Lovely question. I think that what I'm proud of first is that we have been together 10 years and never fight or argue (if we have an occasional heated discussion it is always because I get heated - need to work on that) and second that we are actively shaping our family and life according to our complementing views, including having loads of plans for the future!
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/15 12:53 PM
1

Call it synchronicity but I've just come across this post today by Tim Ferriss. http://fourhourworkweek.com/2009/01/20/learning-language/ Also great content on youtube of this gent (author of 4 hour workweek, among other books).
/r/RedPillWomen06/07/15 04:48 PM
9

I think if you both haven't discussed the option of you moving abroad with him, you are not in a comitted relationship with common goals. If you want marriage and kids, this might not be a horse worth betting on.
/r/RedPillWomen05/07/15 09:16 PM
1

Connection first, sex second.
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/15 04:10 PM
10

I don't think imposing an elitist attitude contributes any more to the quality of this sub than people who 'only' cook or clean do.
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/15 05:39 AM
2

I totally relate - I never worry about sounds or locked doors when my SO is here but when he is away I lock the doors even when I am upstairs getting the kids ready for bed. I jump at every sound and listen so intently I can only hear the blood rushing in my ears. I have found however that no amount of security devices can take this away. The fears are inside ME so I try to overcome them by not fighting the feeling, meditating, slow breathing etc. It does get better, slowly.
/r/RedPillWomen23/06/15 07:47 AM
2

Thank you for proving our point
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/15 08:13 AM
2

That may have been fake, but try this Dutch gem http://glamora.ma/2015/04/haha_vrouw_is_niet_blij_met_jo.html Obviously in Dutch but I think you get the idea. Basically she said it looked "different", then started to complain about workspace, lack of sockets and limited freezer space. It's from a (horrible bluepill) show called (translated) Help, my husband is a DIYer and this episode has been mockingly renamed Help, my wife is ungrateful.
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/15 05:05 PM
1

Very exciting!
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/15 01:36 PM
2

My goals for this week are: 1) learning the basics of sailing. I'll be going on a beginners sailing course wednesday - sunday. It'll be my first time going away for more than one day from my SO and children. I'm excited (and a bit nervous). 2) Leaving the house in order so my SO had it a bit easier this week, being alone with the kids for the first time for multiple days. This means clearing the clutter, dishes and a mountain of laundry before I go. He is a great cook, so no problems there lucki…
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/15 10:39 AM
3

It's something that I am at fault for not addressing sooner. You already know what to do. Adress it, asap. I honestly don't even know how to phrase any of this to him without turning it into a huge wall of text Try something along the lines of "Martin, I really like you and I can see us having a great future. I need to know where you stand in this and if you feel the same way." stressing him out is the last thing I want to do. His reaction is his, I don't think you have a say in this nor are you…
/r/RedPillWomen11/05/15 07:09 PM
3

Exactly. Be a wife to him. I have to admit I don't fully understand your frustration. I am in a 10 year relationship and we have a house and 2 kids together. Not married, and I don't care. My parents were married and they divorced. I'd think the quality of the relationship is more important than a piece of paper or a big party, but then again, I'm not from USA so YMMV.
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/15 10:32 AM
10

Catching yourself doing it is the first step, even if it is after the fact at first. In time you will notice quicker and be able to stop it in its tracks by saying: "I was interrupting you, wasn't I? Sorry, please continue". Later on you can will be able to catch yourself before interrupting.
/r/RedPillWomen17/03/15 08:06 AM
2

I struggle with this too a bit, and I'm practicing telling how I feel, rather than show it (without much control). So in your post you give the example of being stood up. I think by saying "You stood me up, that really sucked. I was in that diner alone waiting for you for a good amount of time, not knowing if you would come, getting anxious." Or something along those lines.
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/15 08:09 AM
2

Are all 3 options equally good? Or can you figure out an order of preference, with possibly 2 options in a tie. If 2 options really are equally good (with all the pros and cons listed that you both can come up with) it may not matter which one you choose. You can flip a coin or better yet let him pick one. The point is that between 2 equally good options, the option you go for will almost always feel as the right one down the road, simply because the other path is unknown. I saw a TED talk about…
/r/RedPillWomen12/03/15 07:21 PM
1

Sounds to me like drinking is not the problem, but your anger is. Drinking only brings it to the surface. Deal with the anger. What is it? Where does it come from? I can highly recommend watching videos of Teal (Ask Teal or Teal Swan) on youtube about emotional work. Warning: she is a spiritual type youtuber so to some that might be too "out there", but most of the things she says really hit home with me. I reckon that if you deal with the alcohol only, your anger will surface in other areas of …
/r/RedPillWomen07/03/15 03:58 PM
13

Hi! 32 yo, mother of 2 small girls, from Holland. Not married but Man and I have been together for 9 years. I do have a ring, though :) We just never married but have all our paperwork regarding kids etc. legally sorted. Not uncommon here. Drawn to traditional relationships and self proclamed "old fashioned". Very blessed with Man as he is without doubt alpha and head of the household. I'm trying and learning to be the best wife for my man, a steep learning curve and I'm usually struggling. I'm …
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/14 08:39 PM
2

"I know it's none of my business" it says near the end. That's it. If you want to do anything here, it would be to get to know and support E without judgement and let your husband and his brother figure things out.
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/14 09:20 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter