| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 247 | Welcome to legislation bud | ROAST-A-SCROTE | kimikupkake | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 07:15 AM |
| 92 | How I prevent pedestalling guys | STRATEGY | kimikupkake | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/19 10:22 PM |
| 75 | Officially 2020 in NZ | kimikupkake | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 01:14 PM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 93 | Giving up sex with men has been the best thing everHaven't had sex with a guy in ~4 years and don't miss it at all. The last time was SA and I'm not prepared to put myself in any situation like that again so I just don't bother. Plus, no guy has ever given me an orgasm, or even considered my pleasure. Honestly, I found them all boring in bed. And then having to deal with them and all thier needs / drama afterwards... No thanks. ETA also, I'm willingly childfree. No sex means no risk, no stress or paranoia about "what if I'm the unlucky 0.01%", n… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/01/22 05:43 AM |
| 17 | Queens, what are your plans for NYE?It's just gone new years here in NZ. I spent my evening at my burlesque teachers farm with a bunch of others from that crowd. We had a potluck bbq and ended with a bonfire where we all tossed in our manifestations/intentions for the coming year. I left a little after 11pm as I had an hours drive home to my furbabies. Honestly, best NY I've had in a long time | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/21 12:33 PM |
| 27 | If You're Single, Don't Be Sad During The Holidays.What's to be sad about? I take a 3 week break every Christmas to do projects and relax. My home gym arrived yesterday so I'm putting that together. I've got tequila and margarita mix, and enough diy supplies to repaint the inside of my house (pink dressing room and pastel mint gym 😍). I've got lots of road trips planned with my dogs which include lots of bushwalks historic places and I'll be spending NY with a bunch of my girl friends on a farm with a bonfire. No whinging about what colours I'm … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/12/21 12:01 PM |
| 15 | The IckOmg I literally just had this. Not an ex but the guy I've been into for years. He sent me a pic and.. He just looked sweaty and old. Same with the next selfie. He's aging like milk while I'm aging like wine. I tried to show a friend a "good" picture of him and couldn't find one. Annnnnd that's when the ick hit | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/11/21 11:59 PM |
| 5 | The IckSo many triggers - a guy burped in front of me and didn't excuse himself. Showing up hammered. Acting like a literal child. And becoming dependent on me. The ick feels like a panic attack/claustrophobia. I'm physically repulsed every time they contact me. And it's constant until I end it and then I can breathe again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/11/21 11:45 PM |
| 2 | Please carve my eyes out of my head nowI send them a link to nzs legislation on the harmful digital communications act. Scares them enough to leave me alone 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/11/21 11:35 PM |
| 6 | Strategy - Celebrate the Wins (no matter how small)Such a great habit to start. I did this with work (the type of work I do doesn't really lead to anything tangibly acheivable) so I started hyping myself up and journalling each days accomplishments and found that helped my confidence so much. But duh, if this worked for my job, ofc it'll work for other aspects. New PB at the gym? I'm strong af. Cleaned my kitchen? Yassss look at how good it is, I'm amazing ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/11/21 08:25 PM |
| 33 | How to stop thinking I need a man in my life?I put together a pro/con list. Turns out, all of the pros are things I can (and have) learned to do myself or have paid someone to do (eg major renovations). I have literally proven to myself that I don't need a man and that anything a man could offer I can either do myself or find elsewhere. And I'm proud of all the things I have accomplished - painted my house, worked on a car, landscaped... Life is easy - I don't answer to anyone, all of my money is mine to spend on anything I want, I don't h… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/11/21 08:13 PM |
| 38 | Rejecting your natural form screams “pick me, pick me!”Fuck yesssss, this was my new years resolution. To stop caring about how I should look /act for others opinions, and only care for my own. If I want to pierce up my face and shave my head bc it makes me feel badass, I'm doing it, idc whether anyone else feels like it's a good idea or not | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/01/21 08:20 AM |
| 18 | WTF does this kinda text mean? Seeing this guy about a month. He’s all in to me, then this?I send messages like this when I'm getting bored/want out.. Its like the precursor to ghosting. Yes, I'm a horrible person | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/01/21 05:45 AM |
| 59 | I’m here for it! 😜And are "aggressive" and "bitchy" as opposed to confident | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/20 05:13 AM |
| 8 | LVM forces his wife to leave her entire life behind to support him while he pursues his dreams in his hometown. His business fails and her little idea takes off and she becomes successful.I can't help or provide advice but I just wanted to say that I'm in the same boat. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/11/20 07:40 AM |
| 71 | It’s sad that this kind of behavior from men is so rare.Same here, I always make an effort to remember birthdays even getting a small token for live in partners of friends in thier birthdays. Gifts /something to celebrate events like a new job. Baby things when I found out a much wanted baby was on the way. Turned 30 this year and my friend had mentioned previously that she would take us away for a night to a bnb. My grandma has just died so I needed something good, was so looking forward to it. 4 days after my birthday, got a last minute "want to co… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/11/20 08:21 AM |
| 40 | NEVER get in a guy's car personal experienceSecond this. When I was 17 and in full pickmeisha mode, my 21yr old bf at the time took me on dates which were just "drive to the middle of nowhere". One night he drove me somewhere and refused to take me home unless I sucked his 🍆 I had never even been close to touching a 🍆 let alone sucking it. So he told me to get out of the car. I did and was looking for nearby houses to run to. He ended up dropping me home and I ended it with him. Looking back, I've put myself in so many risky situations. N… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/10/20 09:22 PM |
| 54 | Just a short list of demands from a cross-eyed man. Must be seXualLy oPeN.That's quite a description, did he play roulette with a thesaurus? Clearly grammar is lost on this loser "Long and brown black red hair with dark eyes" | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/20 05:11 AM |
| 10 | BF is upset that his best friend is dating his ex. Now we are on a break.There's two possible outcomes of this, neither being positive (unless you dump him first). 1) he decides he's not over his ex, your whole relationship was a lie and the break is now permanent. He may even try to keep you around as a placeholder gf until he can be with his ex again. 2) he decides he is over her and wants to end the break and take you back. Either way, you're second best to him. If you were his top priority, he wouldn't even have considered it an issue. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 06:45 AM |
| 7 | Why is society so obsessed with sex? It dawned on me that despite it being glorified as “healthy”, the only reason modern humans can have an excessive and unnatural amount of sex is because of birth control—which usually has a shitload of unhealthy side effects.I've never actually had good sex and the last time was traumatic so I just haven't bothered getting a guy involved for the past few years. I have a better experience alone, and no risk of children/diseases. It's a win win situation | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 02:16 PM |
| 5 | I feel insecureWould you want to date a guy who would instantly dismiss you bc of an unchangeable physical feature? They aren't intimidated, they just aren't interested. Be proud of your height, the right (HVM) guy will appreciate having an amazon gf | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 06:53 AM |
| 67 | Guy (43m) says I (37f) talk too much. Played it off like he was teasing me and I was being sensitive by getting insulted. Is this a neg or playful teasing or a flat-out insult? What does he possibly hope to gain by being so rude?Prove that you don't talk too much by ignoring and blocking | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 06:49 AM |
| 4 | Welcome to legislation budJust the link and screenshot | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 07:33 AM |
| 50 | Welcome to legislation budJudging by his silence, it scared/shocked him a little. I doubt he would have read it. He tried sending me another (about a month after this) so I sent him one back and got an "I get it, I'm sorry". ETA the legislation doesn't actually cover sending nudes, it's more focused on revenge porn. I just wanted to freak him out | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 07:29 AM |
| 12 | To Reach or Not to Reach?I don't make any moves to indicate I have considered paying. Yes I always have the money available to pay my way but I do not expect to use it. If he suggests anything like splitting it or whatever, I do so and never speak to him again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/08/20 08:15 AM |
| 13 | Guys asking to hangout on dating apps?Savage, I'm going to use this ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 07:49 AM |
| 21 | Men and farting/burping.I've dumped a guy for burping and not excusing himself. It's not hard to use manners and showed that he didn't respect me enough to make an effort. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/07/20 07:04 PM |
| 4 | If you could tell personally what red flags do you, as a woman, have and show?I have this same problem, aim for this year is to project more happy and bubbly vibes, less prickly scary vibes as they're currently scaring everyone who doesn't know me away | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/01/20 08:07 AM |
| 3 | What do you say when the guy asks you to pick the date spot?Could go either way imo. I'd give him a couple of places and let him pick. That way you're still "helping" but he's making the decision and the organising is up to him. And it means that you're setting a precedent for him to not be lazy and let you do it all. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/01/20 07:57 AM |
| 2 | Jobs that can be green flags?Military. Not met a good un yet. Green flag - not so much a profession, but a career where there's development AND hes willing to develop. I work for a large company with a call centre, but there's lots of room to move and be promoted. Anyone who is happy to stay in the call centre for the rest of thier days is a red for me, but using it as a stepping stone is green (that's what I've done). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/01/20 11:38 AM |
| 2 | Officially 2020 in NZI went for a brown smoky eye with gold, it looked amazing. Its a way to feel super pampered for a big/special occasion. NZ is definitely worth a visit, especially the South Island if you ever get the chance. Its super picturesque down there. Enjoy your NY :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 07:09 PM |
| 11 | #MakeHimWait2020. 90 days minimum.If he's looking at you and focusing on you, touching you (even just a hand on your back), feet pointed towards you, body pointed towards you, mimicking your gestures, touching his mouth, posturing - hands pointing to groin subconsciously.. Essentially, if he's interested in you, he'll display most of these. If he's into you, there's sexual attraction, and therefore tension. There's not much difference between a guy being interested and sexually interested, no matter how well behaved, high value … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 03:14 PM |
| 30 | In your opinion, who’s the worst pickmeisha among pop culture characters?Ugh these two do my head in. I dont think it's cute to wake up to some dude in my bedroom. Nor someone whos idea of love is control and punishment with a side of emotional blackmail and manipulation. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 02:28 PM |
| 5 | Traveling for men.Hahaha I'm using this next instead of one of my more passive excuses. Direct, to the point and 110% accurate | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 02:23 PM |
| 5 | How to Deal with Men Who Won’t “Play Along” NicelyI'd love to be able to do this but I have a terrible poker face | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 02:20 PM |
| 8 | #MakeHimWait2020. 90 days minimum.Ease the pressure by *doing yourself * if you don't think you can wait. Rather use up batteries than my self worth | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 02:18 PM |
| 6 | #MakeHimWait2020. 90 days minimum.They feel it. No tips, just fact. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 02:17 PM |
| 3 | I need help, throw away accountWeight - you need to find something that works. I HATE depriving myself in any way, so I decided to try intermittent fasting because it works for me. Another option is meal delivery diets. Or anything that works for you - find your trigger. Family - I haven't bought a bf around my family in years. My grandma wants to see me with a nice man before she dies, comments on my style etc. I smile and nod and do my own thing anyway. No one else can set the pace for your life except you. I'm a little int… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 02:09 PM |
| 13 | OPEN Q&A THREAD FOR MEN: Explain to FDS what a rapist looks, talks, and acts like. Also provide a full proof way to know they’re not safe to be alone with before you’re actually alone. [Trigger Warning]You mean the men not having strong boundaries by ignoring "no" right? Because I had pretty strong boundaries saying no right up until the gun was brought out. How much stronger should my boundaries have been? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 01:54 PM |
| 63 | Where's women's "deserved" oral for cooking for men since the beginning of time?"babe I cooked us ramen, can you give me head now" fuck right off. Dogs get treats for tricks, you don't deserve a treat for feeding yourself a warm meal buddy | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 01:49 PM |
| 8 | Tips for a first date? I have been in an abusive relationship for a while and I am finally ready to start dating again.If he doesn't make actual plans with date, time and location, don't push for it. He should be suggesting these, and you can agree if it works for you. If he doesn't and expects you to set these, Next! He's either lazy and will expect this in the future, or an LVM. Always get yourself to and from the date. You don't know him, so don't give him your address until you can trust him. Don't get in a car with him and let him take you somewhere (sorry I'm overly cautious about this) Don't sleep with hi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 01:41 PM |
| 11 | Imagine the woman you want to be.Amen | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 01:19 PM |
| 2 | Is asking if he can cook for you HVM behavior?That's such a sweet ritual! ❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 04:58 AM |
| 3 | Struggling to build attraction for HVM. Advice?Just because they're HVM, doesn't mean they'll be your toe of HVM. My advice is don't put too much pressure on yourself to like a guy just because he's HV. Also, I too have a LVM type, I like the chase. I like military. I just admire them like diamonds and let them be on thier way. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 04:47 AM |
| 5 | REMINDER: Social &!biological science is full of self important male delusional nonsense. These “studies” on women’s sexuality are shaping a narrative they want to exist.Any holes a goal 😬 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 04:44 AM |
| 5 | Man creates questionnaire website for finding a partnerI didn't have it in me to change my "atheist/agnostic" answer, plus it's too early to drink away those images of him hahaha | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 04:43 AM |
| 4 | Has anyone visited /r/seduction?Patti Stanger has the same rule - always kiss on the first date so she feels the spark 🙄 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 04:41 AM |
| 5 | Is asking if he can cook for you HVM behavior?I think cooking for OP and bringing her some would be one thing - I love baking and bake for friends and family and share new recipes I've cooked too. But in a private setting, it almost sets the scene for "dessert".. Imo it's too early for cooking at home unless OP is ready to be alone with her date, and whatever else comes next. Past experience has taught me to be very cautious though, so I'm a little biased | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 04:40 AM |
| 11 | Man creates questionnaire website for finding a partnerI made it 3 questions in 😂 "goodbye (no kiss)" | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/12/19 04:08 AM |
| 10 | The Best Way is Still Difficult (Warning: A Bit Whiny)It doesn't sound pathetic, I've been there too. And I still have moments where all I crave is a human touch. But then I think, at what cost to me. Stress, anxiety, emotions.. So I do fall asleep with a pillow behind me, I cuddle my dogs, I treat myself to something special and count all my blessings that I would not have if I give in | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 11:26 PM |
| 13 | Ladies, If you "overfunction" in your interactions with men, you never find out if he's a LVMI'm the same at work, very much the leader and organiser. I'm not going to let that into my romantic relationship just for a date. There's better things I can do with my time and for my self esteem | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 11:24 PM |
| 19 | Ladies, If you "overfunction" in your interactions with men, you never find out if he's a LVMSounds like he may end up being a bit of a project. Will push back/cry inability or ignorance on anything until you direct him to what you expect | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 11:14 PM |
| 47 | Ladies, If you "overfunction" in your interactions with men, you never find out if he's a LVMOr phone with ability to call to make reservation. Or email to do it in writing. Or even fb messenger for some restaurants. I've managed to use all 3 to secure different bookings, unsure why it's so hard for them 🤷♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 11:12 PM |
| 28 | sharon stone was blocked from bumble…SAME except they won't unban me anymore. I'm a little flattered that I'm hot enough to be a bot 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 11:09 PM |
| 257 | This has been trending on twitter a bit and I just wanted to know what you guys think about thisI was in the hospital ER with a kidney stone, from 3am to 3pm by myself. Parents were at court with my brother. Told my (male) boss and he offered to come and wait with me so I wasn't alone. Bf at the time (the crier) used the self pity "sorry I can't be there, no ride wahwah" and I spent some time making him feel better. Ugh I cringe at my former self | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 11:07 PM |
| 31 | How do you guys respond to something like this? I want him to plan the date.The passive aggressive in me wants to suggest sending him a 👍 and leaving it there | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 11:04 PM |
| 2 | Would I be acting like a Pick-Meisha if....There are a couple of things that have helped so far. 1) I feel the need to help everyone BUT I'm an everyone too, dont set yourself on fire to keep others warm. 2) wait before answering (if it's a non urgent thing). This is especially useful for work. 3) consider your needs first - someone is hungry and needs food/cold and needs a coat /needs a ride, will you need that food? It's your food/coat/petrol etc. Will you get it back? 4) if these people in need are grown adults, adulting for them isn'… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 10:59 PM |
| 3 | What are your thoughts on traditional marriage?😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 08:41 PM |
| 3 | Are men inherently LV if they go to a strip club?Yes they are. I worked with a bunch of guys on a project last year and went with them for after work drinks. At the end of the night, a male colleague suggested going to the strip club. I'd never been so tagged along. All the other men chose to go back to thier hotel rooms. All the guys were married, including the one who went to the club. Turns out he was a regular there when he was out of town. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 07:06 PM |
| 4 | Would I be acting like a Pick-Meisha if....This is a struggle I'm working to overcome. My first instinct with ANYONE is to help, or give what I can, usually to my own detriment or nothing in return. Pickmeisha me from the past would do a care package for a guy I was interested in when he was sick. Through therapy, I've learnt that this is what I would like when I'm sick so I project it onto others. Don't do it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 06:55 PM |
| 17 | What are your thoughts on traditional marriage?I'm starting to feel this way myself. I cannot think of any single benefit to being married, only negatives. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 06:31 PM |
| 11 | What are your thoughts on traditional marriage?🙌 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 06:29 PM |
| 3 | What helps you stay strong?Write out all the good things about your life right now. Write out all your good qualities. Write everything no matter how small. Read it when you feel weak/down. Make a strong woman/empowerment playlist. Listen to it, dance to it. Do some self care - face masks, fluffy robe, fuzzy socks. Do your nails, fake tan etcetc. Do a YouTube workout. Put on a cute/sexy outfit, do your hair and makeup and take some selfies. Realise how gorgeous you are. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 06:28 PM |
| 2 | [Discussion] Would you keep a male pickmeisha?Thanks :) I'm 110% fine, it was 4 years ago but gives me a winning breakup story lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 06:19 PM |
| 7 | [Discussion] Would you keep a male pickmeisha?I just posted a response to OP but this is so true. Its so stressful | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 06:13 PM |
| 9 | [Discussion] Would you keep a male pickmeisha?Ugh my last official bf was a pickmeisha. Also LVM but that's a story for another time. Practically begged me to be his gf, was always trying too hard - I could tell it was desperation and not HVM effort. It all came to a head when he acted like a child at my birthday party. I ended it, he cried, begged me to stay, cried for his mum, told me I was his self esteem etcetc. Dropping him was a weight off my shoulders as I could just do me. I swear, I could smell the desperation on him and it didn't … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 06:12 PM |
| 6 | 2020 goals ✊🏽Get that promotion I've been working for Buy a race car and race it Restart pole fitness and start burlesque classes Become a volunteer firefighter Finish my home renovations and start hosting dinner parties | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/12/19 12:27 AM |
| 1 | #FuckboyFree2020 #KickHimOut2020 # LevelUp2020 Report InI'm in, need to focus on myself and leveling up | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/12/19 08:17 AM |
| 13 | If Men Were Honest (A Game)Username: mindfuck666 I come cross as really edgy and aloof, but actually I have severe anger management issues. I'll let you think I want you, but will sleep with girls behind your back. When you find out from our mutual friends and cut me off, I'll message you and call you relentlessly until you give in. Then I'll say everything you want to hear to give me a second chance. I'll introduce you to people as my girlfriend and the next morning tell you it doesn't count, I'll ask you to be exclusive… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/12/19 05:29 AM |
| 3 | How I prevent pedestalling guysYeah, I think of the fairytale WAY before I should. Which is why this helps, especially coming up with more of the cons | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/12/19 04:33 AM |
| 4 | How I prevent pedestalling guysDefinitely going to start with the self dates, at least until I've firmly immersed myself into feeling like a queen | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/19 11:53 PM |
| 15 | How I prevent pedestalling guysOh he's gone. Good riddance 🤷♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/19 11:38 PM |
| 31 | How I prevent pedestalling guysI like to meet relatively soon to check chemistry. The red flags came out after the meeting unfortunately. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/19 10:54 PM |
| 17 | “Let’s see where this goes” is the biggest lie of all time. He KNOWS where he wants it to go by the end of your first date.I needed to read this today, thank you. Been arguing with myself over what I now realise is an LVM. As of now, I don't have the time or energy to "see where this goes" except for straight to blocked | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/12/19 08:23 AM |
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