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lovesheavyburden Archive

View 2 posts and 27 comments by lovesheavyburden on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
12

ADVICElovesheavyburden/r/RedPillWomen31/05/24 04:20 AM
1

lovesheavyburden/r/RedPillWomen18/04/24 10:17 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
7

I think you would love Laura Doyle’s The Empowered Wife podcast and book — often recommended for marriages in difficulty but all of these things are part of the 6 intimacy skills (gratitude, receiving graciously, being girl of fun and light, spouse fulfilling prophecies, listening without offering advice)…
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/25 03:57 AM
9

Many different faiths align with Laura Doyle, and she doesn’t endorse one specifically. She’s had guest speakers and coaches of many faiths on her podcast, and has been on many interfaith podcasts.
/r/RedPillWomen21/10/24 01:51 AM
5

I was a virgin until I was 30 — entered my first relationship at 33. I’m still with the same guy at 36. I am a chubby lady, but I’m working on my health, and most importantly, I’m working on my mental health. For me, I learned slowly a few things. 1) I’m most likely autistic and have good making skills, but ND people tend to mature slower than their peers. This means that when my peers were starting to marry, I was just starting to date (of course I went on several awkward dates as a teen, but q…
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/24 08:06 AM
1

😂
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/24 07:24 AM
30

“They’re all going” but literally it’s just your boyfriend and L. … He’s not a HVM. And it is extremely fishy.
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/24 05:14 PM
1

I have a high reactivity to death that my bf has seen and identified first hand. If he were to go before me, presumably when he’s 100 and I’m 93… I’m out the second after him. If I have to pull a “Buttercup” to do so I will, but if he doesn’t wake to tell me that there is a shortage of perfect breasts in this world, I will, for certain, go through with it. I agree with your selfishness. I do not care to live a single day with that pain, and he’s not even my husband yet.
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/24 11:21 PM
0

Why did you choose the Ford SUV? How long have you had it? Would it be possible to return it for something you like more? How many did you test drive before deciding on the Ford? I’ll be honest, sometimes I get aggressive on the road. I flip people off, I curse at them ( so many “mother f-er” comments in my car), but I think in this day and age if you aren’t a little aggressive in the car, you’ll probably not make it to your destination. Really, I think you should look at how to drop your ego wh…
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/24 02:16 AM
4

I’m curious if it’s you identifying that you are stubborn or that someone is telling you that you are stubborn and resistant to feedback. When someone gives you advice at work (or school), how do you take it? Tell me more about your previous car and driving habits. You say you are changing them at your boyfriend’s request but tell me how they were in comparison to now. I’m all for submitting, but there are things you shouldn’t submit for until you are certain you will marry the person (preferabl…
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/24 01:20 AM
1

I truly appreciate you saying this! This is how I meant it! He and I actually talked about it tonight, and I gave him the things I discussed here (cat litter genie to help him with his cats, a candle I found that I knew he would like, snacks for summer break, and curtains that I found at Family Dollar because he complained that his curtains didn’t do the job). While I did a lot, my goal was to help him with things he needs, show him I love and care about him, and I listen to the things he says a…
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/24 05:46 AM
3

To be fair, this is just a snapshot of our time together. I was giving a LOT more at the beginning of the relationship (a lot more emotional labor, a lot more “equal” in paying for things—by that I mean that he would buy dinner and I would offer to split and then behind his back I would buy the movie tickets or tickets to the next thing we would do to “pay it back”—I was also over stepping his desires a lot more and demanding things look a lot more “tit-for-tat” than I am now), and as I have ste…
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/24 12:27 AM
3

I think instead of equal what I mean is balanced… an equal give and take. I feel more like I’m taking more than I am giving right now and that is not comfortable for me. I prefer to show I care through the things I say and do for him. Others have offered great advice, which has helped me to make a plan of care for him to balance out my give and take.
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/24 12:10 AM
5

I am making a couple purchases of healthier snacks for him and a litter genie and second litter box for his cats. I’m hopeful that will help his “litter box” stress (and help his boys because he hasn’t been to overwhelmed with life to clean the litter box. (The garbage disposal in the community means you have to drive to throw it and scooping the litter means you need to drive to throw the trash and when you don’t have energy to throw the trash you don’t scoop which means accidents for the boys)…
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/24 09:46 PM
3

I appreciate that a lot. I hope that he and I can keep this going well… he and I are dedicating to treating each other well, and being respectful. I agree parenting is 100% that way, and it upsets me when people think their children need to provide emotionally or physically for their relationship!
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/24 03:03 PM
3

I love this. One thing I know he hates is doing his cats litter box. I’ll be moving closer very soon, so I look forward to helping him with that (I’m saving to get him two new boxes - his cats only have one and with him hating doing the boxes, they tend to have accidents. I think they will be better behaved if they have two). I’ll also try to remember to get him a game pass for Xbox as he loves to play games, but hates spending the money for it. Thank you for the fantastic ideas!
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/24 09:41 AM
12

I’ve lost 70+ lbs. it’s been a total life changer… in all areas. It’s helped my relationship, career, family life… the biggest reason it helped is that it changed my relationship with my body. I’m more comfortable in my skin now. I’ve done therapy my whole life and the last therapist I’ve been working with has helped tremendously (I don’t dissociate my feelings anymore and I’m not emotionally eating). But I had the help of medicine, too. Balanced my hormones, helped my adhd, and stopped my addic…
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/24 12:42 AM
1

Yes that will be great! I’ll send you a message shortly. And 100%. I am not married so not all of the rules are going to apply, but some of them still do—I still need to put myself first, and I still need to show him respect and trust that he will do the things without me nagging or bossing. I started this journey because I was getting to a point where I was telling him what to do/say (at first because he asked me) and then out of habit. Part of it being that English is not his first language, b…
/r/RedPillWomen19/04/24 11:01 AM
1

So, he didn’t end up coming—but I also didn’t go to him. I took care of my needs which I still will say I need to do first. My needs are for rest—his were too—and I didn’t do something that would build resentment because I gave in to his needs more than my own. Still a win, but not a perfect swish. I’ll still take it and feel peace. Out of curiosity—are there any subreddits for Laura Doyle’s book, having your insight was really helpful for me today, and I’d love to find a group who understands t…
/r/RedPillWomen19/04/24 02:38 AM
9

You were right! I let him know I couldn’t (had to make a quick dr appointment in my town and let I’m know I was really tired) and he made the plan to come to me 🥰 This works. I can’t wait to keep learning!
/r/RedPillWomen18/04/24 02:44 PM
3

Thank you SO much for this insight. I’ve not yet finished the book, but I’m taking it all in. I just got to the gift receiving section and I got a little confused (yes I want to go out to dinner, but good god I can’t do that drive again. Thankfully, the end is near. I’m moving closer to him by July.) It helps to be reminded that when I can’t, I can’t, and I don’t need to have a reason. But in our relationship I’ll definitely give him more than just “I can’t.” He’s the best person I know, but I’m…
/r/RedPillWomen18/04/24 11:21 AM
2

Also—totally haram to have premarital sex anyway so that in itself is a massive red flag. I can’t tell where you are from, OP, but if he is Muslim and you are not, you still can’t have sex after breaking fast anyway. (My —haram— boyfriend is Muslim and I am casually exploring becoming a revert. But this is something he and I talk a lot about and have been especially this month).
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/24 07:50 AM
4

Met my guy on Facebook dating. I liked it better because it told you when you had similar friends or groups in common and if they were on their worst behavior you could call them out to mutual friends. But I just got my tinder “your account will be deleted” email and I said, “good. Hope I never use it again.”
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/24 12:04 AM
1

Since you will be gone 2-3 nights a week, and will likely stay with your boyfriend from time to time, look into inexpensive air bnbs in your area, move stuff you don’t need into a storage unit, and keep a few things in a couple suitcases (one you can keep at your boyfriends when you aren’t in town). You’re in a great position to move to another country with nothing, and you can save money by staying in air bnbs when your partner needs space rather than renting a place you don’t use or like.
/r/RedPillWomen23/03/24 02:20 AM
25

This this this! You’re providing wife services with a girlfriend pay check and no guarantee he will want to stay with you long term, since he won’t include you in 5% ownership. He can kick you out at any point and move his next girlfriend in with no repercussions financially for him. Your parents are right that this is a bad deal for you. Get married before you move in… and don’t give wife service until there’s a promotion in title.
/r/RedPillWomen22/03/24 11:43 PM
11

I’m reading this trying to figure out what makes him “high value”…. No man would be high value in my book unless he treated me like I’m high value.
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/24 06:54 AM
1

I met my partner at 33. Before him I only willingly had sex with 1 person. I was assaulted 2x. I never had a relationship, but that’s largely because I was focused on career, and didn’t feel comfortable with dating. We’ve never really talked body count, but he was previously married, and had a year long relationship after his marriage before he met me. We exist…
/r/RedPillWomen29/02/24 10:52 AM
1

My boyfriend and I have talked a lot about this. Largely because his ex-wife was very spendy and would take far more than her share from the joint marriage account, and in part because I don’t want to ever be in a position where I can not access my own money if I needed it (I trust him… and the biggest trust is that he understands my need to have my own account in case something were to happen). He has shared that if we had kids it would be good for one of us to stay home with them, but I work i…
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/24 08:42 PM
1

I’ve been there too! It really is your anxious attachment going into over drive. It’s amazing to talk non-stop for several hours, and it feels great! And you anxiety says “hey wait a second, he’s not texting back. I need to get his attention back on me or he’ll leave!” This is where your “secure op” needs to step in, even if you don’t feel like you can. You can. I promise. Fake it till you make it. But not only do you need to start acting from a place of security, you also need to begin acting i…
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/24 05:53 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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