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madamejesaistout Archive

View 8 posts and 143 comments by madamejesaistout on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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247

Normalize the term "f*ckzoned"!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/21 08:03 PM
17

This isn't new, this has been going in my whole life and I'm 39 years old.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/21 05:00 PM
54

If my partner asked me to do this I wouldn't speak to him for as long as it takes to get a divorce and get him out of my house.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/21 05:47 PM
171

I'm sorry you went through that but I'm glad you puked on his rug. I hope he had to clean it up
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/21 03:38 PM
32

This has been a pet peeve of mine forever. When I was a kid, I noticed that my aunts and grandmothers would sign their husband's name to my birthday cards. I told my Dad that he has to physically sign my cards or it doesn't count. When I left for college, my mom would send me a card every week and my dad's own signature was usually on those cards. As an adult, I like sending cards. I almost always only send cards to my women friends. Even if I was friends with their husbands first.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 07:55 PM
32

I had a guy friend in grad school. I very openly had a crush on him. I got bangs over spring break and when he saw me he said, "your hair looks weird!" I said, "Don't you have two sisters? You should know better than to say something like that." He said, "Your hair looks different." He never wanted to date me. After a year or so I realized how lucky I was!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/21 07:41 PM
21

Your rom-com comment made me think of this SNL skit: https://youtu.be/PgfiXtvej7Q Things just magically happen in movies, men forget you have to actually put in effort IRL.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/21 10:11 PM
40

I have a friend who lives near my city. He would occasionally send a message to me saying he was maybe going to be driving through my city on a certain day. I don't respond. What is that? Should I wave at the highway when I imagine you driving through my city? If he wants to meet up he can propose a day and a time. Actually that probably wouldn't work because I've blocked him now! I got tired of the vague messages.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/21 10:08 PM
68

Me too! I bought myself flowers for my birthday a few weeks ago. They about to be fully composted but for less than $10, I had a little spark of joy every time I saw them. Was I sad that I don't have a man in my life to buy me flowers? Nope. Same amount of joy getting them for myself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/21 06:55 PM
65

I'm insulted as a woman and a dog lover!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/21 07:08 PM
18

Yes, the original post was confusing a bank account with getting a credit card: "in 1974, the Equal Credit Opportunity Act passed which was supposed to prohibit credit discrimination on the basis of gender. Before its passage, many banks granted credit cards to women only with their husbands' signatures and outright refused to issue them to unmarried women." Source: https://www.oneadvisorypartners.com/blog/the-history-of-women-and-money-in-the-united-states-in-honor-of-womens-history-month
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 02:21 AM
44

It was not cowardly to leave! It was the right thing to do
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 12:22 PM
2

I like this! I remember thinking that men just wanted to suck my soul dry and thought I was being melodramatic for many years until I found FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 04:11 PM
15

This reminds me of when I was staying with my mom and she kept thanking me for doing dishes and vacuuming. I told her I didn't need to be thanked for cleaning up after myself because I'm not a man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 01:37 PM
241

Hmmm if a woman will is only interested in a man for his money is called a "gold digger" what do you call a man who is only interested in a woman for her cooking?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 02:17 AM
32

I'm 39 and single. I bought a house by myself. I have two dogs. A year or so ago I realized I was probably past the window of having a child naturally. Letting go of the idea of having kids (which is still very hard, don't get me wrong) and learning that I could buy my own home really killed my desperation to find a partner. I'm surprised every day how much I don't care what scrotes think of me. I do want to date, when I feel safe going to restaurants again, but now the only reason to spend time…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 01:45 AM
7

My plan is to keep a man like this out of my house!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 05:51 PM
60

Well into my 30s, after some therapy and other self-work, I realized that no one else is looking out for me, so I damn well am gonna look out for myself!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 11:55 PM
17

Also he's nearly 40 and is a student???
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 08:58 PM
8

Yikes
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 08:39 PM
23

This is a joke, right?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 07:57 PM
3

There were so many memes about how sad that song is when it first came out. I never understood those memes, it always sounded like a normal break-up to me!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 06:50 PM
29

If a man dating my sister or any of my friends tried to pull this shit I'd be forwarding his message so fast to his gf. No hesitation. Also, I love the scrote-logic, "it's not cheating, it's being poly. But my primary partner doesn't know or consent." Who is stupid enough to fall for that??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 07:05 PM
27

Hmmm now I'm starting to rethink this. If he thinks having a woman around is like having a dog then he didn't expect her to cook, clean, it do laundry. So at least there's that. /S
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 11:47 AM
16

Putting up walls in a relationship may be bad but this dude will never be in an actual relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 09:34 PM
22

I think the "love the one you're with" advice only applies to men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 12:06 PM
88

Right because no man who has a girlfriend or wife has ever exhibited violence or broken the law. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 08:55 PM
70

Yikes! I had a guy friend (not even an SO) who joked that women should be seen and not heard. So I didn't speak in his presence for 2 weeks. He didn't enjoy that at all!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 01:50 PM
55

That's terrible. Although there's a simple solution, just use his favorite shirt as a pad...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 09:46 PM
12

Can you help me find an email address or other way to contact the hosts of the podcast? I want to apply to be a co-host for the political podcast!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 02:41 PM
29

That is so gross! 🤮 "You're getting up there" "Maybe for a pedophile" Of course I agree with the previous poster who said you don't have to tell anyone your age.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 07:43 PM
320

That would not be enough for me. I would also need him to make the appointment and get the same procedure done himself so that he knows what he's asking Edit: thanks for the award!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 03:35 AM
89

The response should be "If I'm so much better at that, then you need the practice"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/21 11:13 PM
142

If an adult can't cook or clean, that's embarrassing. Fixed it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 04:11 PM
56

I know someone who talked about how her husband kept breaking her things in couple's therapy (somehow was able to control his clumsiness with his own things.) The therapist said she shouldn't leave her things out where he could get them. Like he's a fucking Labrador whose tail knocks stuff off the coffee table. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 12:12 AM
3

"everybody else" -- does he mean bots? Or sex workers?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 09:49 PM
1

I love this part: "I’m not telling him that he’s wrong to be the way he is. I’m talking to you. And what I want to tell you is that this is not the partner for you. This man would like to be a statue who stands in the exact same place doing the exact same things for the rest of his life. That’s not an exotic trait — lots of men are like that, actually. But reflect carefully on the implications of that: He doesn’t want to have new, risky experiences or encounter people who might have ideas or opi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/21 05:23 PM
3

Thank you for this, I needed this reminder.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/21 12:38 PM
52

This really pisses me off. I'm a fat woman, I've been fat my whole life. Men HATE fat woman-- it's insane. There's an impression that fat people can't control themselves around food. Like if there's any food around, a fat person can't stop herself from eating it. I think a lot of disgust for fat people comes from the perception that they can't control themselves. Well it's equally disgusting when a man can't control his lust. He has to have sex with a woman just because she's there. Also, there …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/21 01:44 PM
2

Have you seen the movie Teeth? ETA: When I made this comment, I had only heard about Teeth. Right after I made the comment, I found it streaming on Amazon Prime and it's so good! The beginning part is very painful because the main character is so afraid of her body, but it was definitely worth it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/21 12:21 AM
37

Holy sh** I don't even know where to begin, like how do you even screen for that kind of behavior?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 05:37 PM
6

Listen, I am not an ugly manhating cat lady. I am an ugly manhating dog lady. Please, if you're gonna hat on us, represent us accurately! Also, I'm only ugly and manhating according to the LV definitions of those words, not according to how I see myself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 04:59 PM
7

Exactly!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 12:02 AM
10

Yup, totally agree
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 12:02 AM
20

I read that in Cosmo. It was an article explaining why you shouldn't expect men to make you orgasm and how to get yourself off well with a man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 11:18 PM
562

She should start a GoFundMe for him and share it with all his friends and family. "I didn't know you were struggling, I just wanted to help"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 02:05 PM
33

I've had more encounters with vegetarian/vegan men insisting their diet is the only acceptable diet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 07:15 PM
30

The last time I read Cosmo was at a party with several women friends. We read an article about how you should buy yourself a drink at a bar so that men don't feel like you're taking advantage of them buying drinks for you. Something about that rubbed me the wrong way. My friend told me that men's greatest fear when approaching a woman is that she will laugh at him. A woman's greatest fear is that she will be raped and murdered. I said, "he can buy the damn drink" And then we burned that Cosmo in…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/21 12:05 AM
167

Yeah that concerns me, too. Being a wife doesn't mean you now have to do all the dishes and cooking and laundry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/21 02:12 PM
113

Someone should make a movie about her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/21 06:02 PM
28

Thanks for telling me your success story, it's still hard for me to believe that someone could find me attractive... It's harder now because of pandemic isolation! I love the idea of pretending to be a femme fatale. It's hard to access that energy, especially in a pandemic when I can't build a social life!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 10:02 PM
19

I definitely did let weight be a barrier. When an LVM did pay attention to me, I thought that was the best I could get. I'm in a much better place now, building a happy single life although I still want to be open to a relationship. Once Covid restrictions lift I'm going to try to meet new people and build a social life because I just moved to a new city.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 10:00 PM
104

Does that apply to women too? I'm 38 and I've never been in a relationship. I think the biggest reason is that I've been fat my whole life so most men don't want to date me and if anyone did, I didn't believe him. I'm hoping it's not too late. I've been doing lots of work on myself, focusing on health and fitness, etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 07:31 PM
15

That's what I did!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 09:35 PM
59

Yes thank you for this! This weekend I finally blocked a dude on social media because of his long history of vague messages. A few years ago I agreed to watch a video of him masturbating. I was trying to explore my own sexuality and that was a experience I'd never had before, so I thought it would be worthwhile. Once was enough for me. For months after that he would constantly send me messages of "hey" across multiple platforms. It was so annoying! I dreaded opening my social media because I did…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 06:55 PM
21

Flirting in a work environment IS sexual harassment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 06:14 PM
1

Oui oui
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/12/20 07:47 PM
15

This is a reference to Parks and Rec.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/12/20 12:28 PM
-3

No I'm not. Being in a relationship means learning how to share your space and communicate intimately with a new person. Yes that person should be worth it, but you can't expect two people to be together and understand each other completely right away. Sometimes it's a challenge. But it's like exercising. Good challenges make you stronger. Bad challenges cause injuries. OP's situation sounds like a good challenge.
/r/askFDS26/11/20 02:36 AM
1

As someone who doesn't like texting a lot, I wouldn't take that as a lack of care. If he shows you that he cares for you in other ways, you can give him some time to get used to expressing himself more. Maybe model that behavior by expressing yourself. Be supportive when he does talk. I'll give an example of what not to do. My mom and I aren't very close, although I think we both try. Awhile ago I realized every time I started speaking passionately about something I care about, she would zone ou…
/r/askFDS26/11/20 01:38 AM
1

Yes I'm in the same boat.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 01:34 PM
23

I'm recovering from covid and I didn't have an appetite the first week. I lost my sense of smell so things tasted off. I wanted simple foods.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 01:24 PM
2

I like the podcast Good One. The host interviews comedians about a bit to explore their process. I really appreciate comedians after learning the behind-the-scenes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 12:09 PM
3

Haha, I really appreciated how they called out Peter's behavior and articulated the distinction between love and possession.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 04:04 PM
6

Ohh that reminds me of Bly Manor! Have you watched it?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 02:23 AM
10

We are not cows to be branded. Ffs
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 02:22 AM
30

I'm a big fan of Magatte Wade. She helps women in her home country of Senegal to start businesses and get independence. One of the companies she supports make lip balm: https://skinisskin.com/
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 01:44 PM
132

I don't think you did anything wrong. It sounds like he just wanted sex and was willing to deceive you for months until he got it. The FDS handbook has a lot of good advice for screening out men who have these intentions but sometimes men are very good liars-- especially if they lie to themselves. I'm sorry this happened. Take good care of yourself. Get tested for STI.
/r/askFDS16/11/20 07:41 PM
7

This is hard because men take credit for women's work...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 12:56 AM
1

I mean, you could draft your sassy response, screenshot it for social media, and then delete before sending...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/20 10:05 PM
189

It's up to us women to refuse to reproduce with them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/20 11:25 AM
17

"If a guy truly loved you he would do xyz" The key is how you define love. It's not a feeling, it's an action. It has nothing to do with everything you offer. It has everything to do with the effort he is willing and able to make to show you that he wants you in his life. Also those three bullet points at the end of your post are all nonsense. Those are the lies he tells himself to avoid facing the fact that he was a jerk.
/r/askFDS13/10/20 09:57 PM
11

I don't blame a person for being ignorant, especially if they're very young. Their reaction to new information is very revealing, however.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/20 02:42 PM
15

Reading these comments, I've been really struggling with this idea. I can understand an HVM not being aware of how shitty other men can be, because they themselves are not shitty. Meanwhile an LVM will protest and argue when a woman comments on some man's shitty behavior, because if women smarten up to their shenanigans, then they get less access to women. Then there's the LVM to comments on the shittiness of other men because they are possessive of their own woman. I am very confused.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/20 02:14 PM
40

Empathy must be followed up with action. You don't have to read his mind, just observe how he behaves. Maybe keep a daily journal. Just one sentence a day can be enough to track a pattern. "Today I felt stressed out and partner didn't help take the load off" and "Today I am happy because partner made dinner and cleaned the dishes without me asking" Then you can flip back and see how many days ended with you stressed out and how many ended with you feeling loved.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 02:12 PM
25

Some men read the book and developed online businesses to teach other men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 12:31 PM
2

You can cultivate friendships on the phone or online.
/r/askFDS01/10/20 03:49 PM
2

Why not cultivate other friendships within the group? Also, it would be better if he was not your main connection to this gamer group. Form your own friendships separate from him.
/r/askFDS01/10/20 02:02 PM
5

It is very weird to have access to someone's email. The best solution is to ask him to change his password and find some other way to connect to the gamer account. Also, change your password and tell him you don't want to share that info anymore. Also, call your friends and family. One strategy is to find replacements for a bad habit. Write a list of things to do instead of thinking about this guy or going through his online history. My list would include read a book, go for a walk, do an exerci…
/r/askFDS01/10/20 11:40 AM
6

I love the chorus: "I tried new positions I learned his friends names I made myself sit through football games" hahaha!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 04:43 PM
1

Yeah! 👏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 11:13 AM
2

I have a very prominent tattoo and TWO smelly dogs. Looks like I'm safe!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 01:30 PM
143

Ok this gave me flashbacks to many conversations I've had in which I said exactly what I meant but the guy I was talking to thought he could "decode" me and figure out what I really wanted. Dude, listen to the words coming out of my mouth! I'm not speaking in code!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 01:38 AM
6

Firstly, I love your username. Second, I chose my username on purpose to confront any male insults (it means Ms. Know-it-all). I knew Reddit was hostile to women so I decided to show up with armor on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 01:32 AM
29

Isn't there a saying that men hear "no" as the beginning of a negotiation? They think they win something when they convince a woman to change her mind. But then all that man is is someone who makes that woman feel bad about herself. FDS teaches us why we feel bad-- because we didn't trust ourselves! Because we let some scrote stomp all over our boundaries and put his desires first. No more, ladies!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 03:39 PM
231

Amy Schumer's movie Trainwreck did this. People were so appalled at her character's behavior but all she did was reverse the genders of what happens all the time in casual dating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 06:23 PM
26

Well it explains a lot about the mental health of his daughters and granddaughters! I'm relieved to finally know the truth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 04:47 PM
60

I found out at my grandfather's funeral that he cheated a lot. I wonder if anyone in my family did one of those DNA tests if we would find some long lost relatives. It's my only chance at having a wealthy aunt leave me all her property so that I can retire young and travel the world.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 02:06 PM
80

So many times I want to respond, "Are you twelve? Because I'm not a pedophile, I don't have sex with children or men who act like children."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 05:45 PM
88

Not having a TV is more and more common. If you invite a woman over, is there a comfortable place to sit that's not in the bedroom?
/r/askFDS24/08/20 10:56 PM
3

I like "shark week" because I usually do feel like a shark is eating me. I was hoping it would make it more clear to men why I am unavailable at that time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 10:04 PM
34

I had a similar experience. A big shift for me was realizing how effective it is to respond to sarcasm by playing dumb and being super literal. It stops the asshole comments pretty quickly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 06:46 PM
8

Exactly. I don't buy bread.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 10:31 PM
103

I'll make a sandwich for a guy who can make me orgasm.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 01:53 PM
21

I don't understand this at all. If I ever go out to eat with someone, date, friend, family, work aquaintance, etc. I am prepared to pay for everyone's meal. If I invited these people out to eat, I'm prepared to pay because I invited them so I'm the "host." Stuff happens. People forget their wallets. Whatever. If I'm sharing a meal with someone, I'm willing to pay for them. I've never paid on a date. Maybe it's just where I live. I always offer to split, but I've been on a lot a first dates and n…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 11:09 PM
9

Yes I knew that. I'm grateful for women in history writing down these lessons.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 10:03 AM
23

"I have all these hot girls chatting me..." Dude. Those are bots.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 12:42 PM
16

They're shocked their actions have consequences.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 01:34 AM
31

Wasn't there a post on this sub a few months ago that said, "this isn't Build-a-B*tch" Did he think you were made of Legos?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 03:13 PM
22

Also if he really thought that he would never have messaged you in the first place!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 03:11 PM
1

Yes you're right, he's probably a feeler. I have taken the quiz many times over the years, sometimes I get F, most times I get T. The part of your comment that stood out is that he needs a practical assistant. I do not want to be his assistant. That's not my job title and I hate all tasks associated with being an assistant-- so that's a problem for me. I hope we can get some more funding soon so that we can hire an assistant for him and take those tasks off my plate!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 10:53 PM
10

I don't think the solution is to avoid women. I would recommend practicing talking to women with no agenda. So if you have a cashier, ask her how our day is going. Little interactions like that to teach your hormones that women are more than just a receptacle for your lust. If you have old female friends, try to have regular friendly communications with them. If you start to feel overly attached, that's where your therapist comes in. You might need some mantras or other tools to help you identif…
/r/askFDS27/06/20 02:24 AM
2

I don't remember exactly, I think it was in the second to last (penultimate) season.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 11:46 AM
77

I know people have problems with the show How I Met Your Mother, but I really liked one episode towards the end of the series where the main character has a "crazy" girlfriend, but then they revisit different parts of his story and realize he was saying stuff to make her crazy. Like he didn't actually break up with her he just kind of chickened out and lied to her. Her behavior wasn't so crazy when you saw it in the context of how he made promises he wasn't keeping.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 06:59 PM
9

Well it's inappropriate for any doctor, unless physical touch was a formal part of the practice (I can imagine hugging being part of a specialized form of therapy). I was associating it with movies where a woman is upset so a man kisses her without consent and suddenly she's better. I wish we didn't have movies like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 06:55 PM
20

I wonder if men actually feel better from touch or if they just believe that their bodies have healing powers for women?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 01:43 PM
12

Right?? Like what will the "love of your life" offer that's better than what the current girlfriend is giving you? The male mind is so baffling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 04:30 PM
81

I had a boss who was terrible in so many ways I could write a book... But this post reminds me of one story. We had a woman colleague who would have a snack of hard-boiled eggs and avocado every day. After a couple years, my boss started eating the same snack. One week of his new snack habit he anniunces to the office his new snack that he invented: hard-boiled eggs and avocado!! As if we hadn't watched my woman colleague eat the same thing every day for two years! I called him on it, I said I c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/20 12:12 AM
2

I know it's been awhile since you posted this, I hope you're doing better. Did you cut her out? I would recommend it, give yourself some time to heal and learn who you are outside of that relationship. You don't have to jump into dating right away. Figure out how to meet new people and be around women without trying to get romantic or sexual.
/r/askFDS14/06/20 08:30 PM
33

I think the most basic advice I can give is: if you see something that needs to be done, just do it. I literally had my boss ask me to send a one line email in an email chain that he was a part of! It would have taken him less time to just send the email himself! But there's something that seems very common with men that they can't just do something without permission or cheerleading or who knows what. See a dirty dish? wash it. Find clean clothes in the dryer? put them away. See a reminder for …
/r/askFDS13/06/20 04:58 PM
12

This sub is the best, only place I feel confident posting because I know I won't be insulted for making an honest mistake!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 08:30 PM
5

Nope, apparently I was wrong about it not being on Hulu, so I'm going to start watching it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 07:47 PM
5

Yeah apparently I only thought I searched for it on Hulu and didn't actually search for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 06:47 PM
7

Weird, my mom just got Hulu and I thought I searched for it, but apparently I didn't
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 06:47 PM
2

Really? Yay!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 06:46 PM
29

I really want to watch it but it's not available on Netflix or Amazon Prime or Hulu! I can't pay for yet another streaming service... :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 05:07 PM
25

So he starts out saying he has very specific requirements from the women he dates-- I doubt any of those requirements really matter to him, what matters is that he finds a woman who will jump to fix it everytime he says he doesn't like something. He wants a slave.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 01:43 PM
121

I will always remember a moment in one of my college freshman classes when a male student interrupted another student, apologized, then kept talking. The professor said, "Wait a minute, and when you recognize that you interrupted someone, you don't keep talking. You let the other person finish." Now I always notice when someone keeps talking after interrupting someone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 04:16 PM
40

Would you be comfortable reaching out to the District Attorney to give testimony about your abuser? I had to give a deposition for my dad's accidental death and it was very difficult, so I would suggest having someone with you to support you. But it might be a safe way for you to hold him accountable without exposing yourself to his family. The DA might be able to keep you anonymous. There may be an organization in your city that helps with these legal proceedings.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/20 03:59 PM
48

I have been fat my while life so I never got a lot of attention from men. I volunteered for a campaign and one of the other volunteers was a guy who suffered from severe social anxiety. He could not get a complete sentence out when he talked to people. He sent me a message to ask me on a date. I felt bad for him, but I also knew I needed good conversation on a date. I was thinking over how to respond when my make roommate came in and I asked him, "Is it too much to ask for a guy who can complete…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/20 03:30 AM
1

I think it's interesting how both groups have very similar problems. As a former political activist it all rings true. Those dynamics happen in grassroots groups. People disagree on who should do what and it's so frustrating!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/20 04:57 PM
29

I've started watching Mrs. America in Hulu and it's so good! So many amazing actresses and the writers and producers are mostly women (based on the credits). There was a great moment in the second episode where Gloria Steinem is arguing with a male publisher about who to put on the cover of Ms magazine. The publisher wants her to put Wonder woman on the cover because she has great legs. They argue a bit and he says, teasing her "oh so you want to be the only woman with great legs, is that?" All …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/20 11:27 AM
47

I had a conversation with a friend recently in which I told her she had every right to get angry (because a dude was mistreating her) and she was silent for a long moment. I really wonder if no one had ever told her she had a right to be angry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/20 06:20 PM
10

Do what you feel comfortable with. Try different kinds of hair removal like waxing or Nair, see what works best. Different people have different preferences, so figure out what you want to look like and be confident in your choice.
/r/askFDS07/04/20 04:13 PM
3

I would try one of the monthly subscription boxes. I had a roommate who used Stitchfix, I think. The stylist worked with her to find flattering items that worked with her lifestyle. When she moved, she gave some of her things to me, and I love them. They're very good quality and I would never have found them in a store.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/04/20 12:14 PM
8

Yes so I tried to explain why shyness isn't a good excuse instead of downvoting what appears to be an honest question. I love the supportiveness of this sub, just wanted to spread the love and support.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/20 01:43 PM
23

I don't know why you're downvoted. I'm new to FDS, but I think even very shy men should put in the effort. If you're attracted to a man and you think he's shy, so you chase him, he learns that he doesn't have to put in any effort to get the benefits of a relationship with you. It sets a precedence of letting him be lazy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/20 11:52 AM
9

He doesn't want a girlfriend, he wants a personal trainer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/20 03:36 PM
47

This makes me want to create an Instagram account just for taking pictures of these guys. You could caption each picture, "this guy creeped on me at date and time and location" ETA: please feel free to use this idea! Imagine if there was a whole genre of Instagram accounts just for calling out creepers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/20 12:39 PM
43

Interesting. Seems like we should always be careful to define our terms with men. If a man says I'm his girlfriend, I expect exclusivity. The HVM you quoted described what I would call a FWB... So we should probably make a habit of clarifying our terms.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/20 08:40 PM
29

Yes, exactly. As i was reading the article, I kept thinking, "I wish I had FDS 10 years ago"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/20 01:16 PM
27

I had a friend post on Facebook that her husband would be happy if she went to a workout class twice a day (can't remember if it was Pilates or something else). They have two young children, so I commented, "well if you go to class on the morning, then your husband needs to get the kids up and feed them breakfast and make their lunches. And if you go in the evening, he needs to make them dinner and put them to bed. So sure, go twice a day" My friend's husband is a good guy, but even the good one…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/20 12:50 PM
9

Maybe it's that saying, "it's the thought that counts" No, the thought doesn't count, the action counts. It doesn't matter if you intend to be HV, you have to actually do the things that make you HV. This applies to men and women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/20 03:17 PM
4

Here is the link: https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2020/01/seeking-cure-domestic-violence/604168/
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 07:20 PM
6

There's a difference between feelings and action. No matter what trauma or upbringing someone experienced, they still make a decision on how to act in a new situation. And you make a decision on how to react. You can empathize with a LVM, and still choose to block him because his actions are not in line with what you need from a partner.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/20 02:49 PM
2

I evicted that man in my head watching and judging me. That's when I finally was happy being single. This sub helped!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/20 02:37 PM
97

"I have blood pressure" 😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/20 02:58 PM
20

A guy did this to me! We met for coffee for a first date and he wanted me to see his condo. I was clueless back then. It sounded like he was just very proud of his condo, but I was not going to a man's apartment after just meeting him! On the second date he picked a nice restaurant then suggested we go for a walk. Surprise! The walk ended at his condo! He really wanted to show me the view from the public patio. OK. So we check out the view. I said I had to get back because my meter was running o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/19 12:38 AM
14

So I had a thing for my recently-divorced boss. He strung me along saying nothing could happen because he was my boss. I found another job and went to a party expecting him to pay attention to me. He brought a date. I was devastated. I went back to work with him because that other job was terrible. I tried to set boundaries but I wasn't strong enough. We continued to flirt. He continued to date other women and answer their calls and show me pictures from their dates. When I finally got it throug…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/19 05:39 PM
23

You nailed it with that last paragraph. A man insisting on sex is pushing at your boundaries to see how much you'll let him get away with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/19 04:56 PM
69

Oohhh so that's why I have such a problem dating! Not enough weed and Xanax!! Also yelling usually means "stating my expectations clearly and firmly"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/19 06:22 PM
2

I agree with OP. I read the book after my first boyfriend dumped me. I get what other commenters are saying, that the book doesn't convey the idea that if you were a better woman, the man will act differently. BUT I did internalize this idea after years of never finding a man who treated me the way I wanted. I don't blame the book, but repeating to myself that this guy and that guy were not into me made me believe that I was a worthless waste of space who didn't deserve love.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/19 04:17 PM
3

I recommend The Art of Charm podcast. They recently replaced the host, so I suggest you go back through their archived episodes for conversations on body language and networking and dating.
/r/ExRedPill07/05/18 12:05 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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