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microfishe Archive

View 17 posts and 34 comments by microfishe on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
15

microfishe/r/Divorce_Men02/11/19 03:14 PM
9

microfishe/r/Divorce_Men24/10/19 11:43 PM
7

microfishe/r/Divorce_Men04/10/20 11:16 AM
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microfishe/r/Divorce_Men07/07/21 03:38 PM
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Need Supportmicrofishe/r/Divorce_Men25/06/25 06:44 PM
6

microfishe/r/Divorce_Men23/10/19 06:16 PM
6

microfishe/r/Divorce_Men25/12/19 04:34 PM
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microfishe/r/Divorce_Men18/06/21 01:36 PM
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microfishe/r/Divorce_Men17/12/22 02:36 PM
3

microfishe/r/Divorce_Men14/11/19 04:36 PM
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microfishe/r/Divorce_Men20/10/19 07:41 PM
2

microfishe/r/Divorce_Men21/10/19 10:50 PM
2

microfishe/r/Divorce_Men25/01/20 12:19 PM
1

microfishe/r/Divorce_Men13/02/21 06:17 PM
1

microfishe/r/Divorce_Men03/11/19 01:08 PM
1

microfishe/r/Divorce_Men08/04/25 12:59 AM
1

Need Supportmicrofishe/r/Divorce_Men21/09/25 04:19 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Please see the other reply - so everything (every mutual find or IRA) irregardless of who’s names it’s in is essentially divided 50/50?
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/25 05:41 PM
2

Thanks - so everything - every fund irregardless of name is divided 50/50 as long as it happened during the marriage? What if some of the money in her 401k was earned before we were married? The fact that it was rolled over to an IRA while we were married makes it common property? (Or whatever the term is)
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/25 05:40 PM
2

Even the IRA account that's in her name only? (But held within a common overall Mutual Fund account)
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/25 04:27 PM
1

Yea, when I first started posting with this account in the psyche forums (posts I’ve long ago deleted) I was grasping to identify what her behavior was. It was my daughter who cracked the case. Now I feel better that I know. The new Taylor Swift song is timely and even mentions Covert Narcissism.
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/22 09:37 PM
1

Thanks. See my other similar reply. Most previous advice was that moving out would put me in a bad position. I guess I need to work that out with the lawyer before I serve notice and if moving out is viable.
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/22 09:34 PM
1

Thanks for the great reply. But moving out seems to run counter to all the advice I was getting when I posted something similar here 2-3 years ago. I guess the first thing I need to work out with the lawyer is if moving out and staying at my dad’s doesn’t look like abandonment.
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/22 09:32 PM
1

She wants an ally. I'm well aware of that. I'm doing my due diligence, and I want that angle to be covered where even a female marriage counselor (who looks like an ally) is even saying out loud that she should see a psychiatrist.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/21 02:20 PM
1

Thanks for the reply. The nature of the disorder prevents that from occurring. Yes, what I'm finding is that BPD/NPD's tend to not think they have anything wrong with themselves. Custody will be limited to your high school child. That child's 18th birthday is definitely on my mind. After that day passes, child support goes away? Though I'll still gladly contribute for college. I'm already aware of how independent they get (from the other children) when they go away to college. Alimony is highly …
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/21 02:13 PM
2

These sound like my wife too.
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/20 12:23 PM
2

she’s found the first guy that showed interest in her and hit the accelerator petal Just curious, is he good looking? I could plausibly see a STBD woman quickly latching onto a not-so-good-looking-guy who's been through a long dry spell and giving him a ton of sex to keep him around.... and he's not going anywhere because he thinks he's hit the jackpot!
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/19 12:59 AM
3

one of the biggest hallmarks of BPD is the fear of abandonment And that describes a lot of her. Early on (when we were dating) she talked a little bit too much about former boyfriend's dumping her (I found out through one of her old friends that she seemed to get into fights with boyfriends very often, which doesn't surprise me that she got dumped often and why) And a lot of her paranoid rants are that she has this feeling that I'm seeing someone else and about to dump her for some imaginary oth…
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/19 06:41 PM
1

you can divorce no fault in a friendly way and split what you have or you can divorce like bitter enemies This makes me have to ask myself "how crazy and vindictive can she be?" BPD's react to abandonment/rejection more than anything else, and serving her divorce papers is certainly that.
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/19 07:43 PM
1

here it seems pretty formulaic That's what I'm curious about. Like one guy said in another thread, California (as an extreme example) is so crazy no-fault that his wife could have been running a brothel of just herself out of the home, and no-fault means that the same formula applies? Everything gets split the same way, support goes the same way, irregardless of what whoever did what?
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/19 07:40 PM
1

Maybe off topic question for the OP (or anyone) -- what if instead of two boys, what if you had two girls (11 & 7) ?? Would you be fighting just as hard for this arrangement? (Leaving your ex's arrested bf out of this for a second) I have all daughters, and they are much much closer to their mom than me. Is it me, or does it seem that most of the guys who are worried the most about custody issues here are when it involves sons instead of daughters?
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/19 06:20 PM
1

It isn't to hold anything against your ex but to protect yourself when the all too common accusations of domestic violence drop. Yes, that's the main reason I heard that you do it for. But does anyone know if it's better to keep it secret that you're recording, or let it be known that you'll be having this thing recording on your belt/lanyard all the time while in the house?
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/19 12:39 PM
2

Relevant question for this thread; it's suggested that after you file for divorce and remain in the house, that you should have an audio recorder on you at all times. But apparently you should keep the recorder a secret? What do you guys think about that? Why not just file for divorce, and then inform her that you'll still be living in the house and you'll be wearing this audio recorder clipped to your belt or on a lanyard around your neck or wherever? (so that she knows she'll be recorded at al…
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/19 12:05 AM
0

Your wife keeps the home and buys you out. Ok, thanks again. Off topic; let's say after I get the proceeds check, I offer to give it to my 3 daughters if my wife agrees to give each one 1/6th ownership of the house. And everyone agrees, and it happens. Have I possibly setup my daughters for potential problems by giving them co-ownership of the house with their possibly unstable mother? (especially considering that if she remarries, her new husband now owns 1/4 of the house?)
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/19 12:25 AM
0

I'd presume you'd get an appraisal and then the one person buys out the other. Yes, this is normal, but instead of her buying out my "half", I'm willing to give that "half" to my daughters (no appraisal needed) who could continue to live there if they want after age 18.
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/19 08:48 PM
0

So instead, I could state that my intention is to give my half of the house to my daughters after the divorce is final, and have the paperwork already made up, to be filed just afterwards? (although her lawyer might say that I could break this promise, it's something that would appear I'm very unlikely to do after I make my intentions known to my daughters and everyone else) Edit: how about doing the above as a negotiating tactic? Offer right up front to write up the paperwork to sign over my "h…
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/19 03:32 PM
2

I should have also mentioned that the house is paid for, no mortgage. I added that to the original post.
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/19 03:28 PM
3

Alimony in the 21st century, really?? Yea, think about that.
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/19 12:51 PM
1

Hopefully the tide is turning. Guys going through a divorce are seeing increasingly other guys not getting married, and may start to change their attitude about re-marrying. You would think that guys who have been through the shit of divorce would be the ones most carrying the torch about not getting married?
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/19 05:47 PM
1

80% of women are only chasing the top 20% of men, and never giving the other 80% of men even so much as a glance I've read about that. I feel for the guys who get ignored all the time because I used to be one of them before I really started working on myself. Thanks to a good healthy regimen of diet and exercise I'm probably top 20% now, so I'd be OK for dating post-divorce. My wife loved seeing me workout at first, but then hated it when she saw me getting much better than her.
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/19 05:46 PM
4

Wow, this article; https://www.nytimes.com/2019/08/03/world/asia/japan-single-women-marriage.html Although Japan is a somewhat unique circumstance in that the wives were expected to be super-submissive, and the husbands were supposed to have lifetime corporate employment. That's all being upended.
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/19 05:41 PM
3

I know a guy (40-something) who shares a rental apartment with his girlfriend. In a co-hab/common law situation, she could derive some assets/payments from him, even though they never signed any agreement other than the rental lease?
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/19 05:39 PM
1

There should be nothing wring with posting the link to a relevant youtube video, right mods? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YbNC2kqI1o Mistake #1 is moving out. (I haven't watched the rest yet)
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/19 11:29 PM
1

Thanks. Yes, hormones play a bigger part than we'd probably like to admit. Apparently it gets really bad during menopause, and this seems to be a time period when a lot of marriages are breaking up.
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/19 05:55 PM
1

Thanks, that sounds a lot like my situation.
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/19 05:54 PM
2

If you move out, there's zero incentive for your wife to settle quicker. Does that affect my ability to date? Years ago I knew a woman who was dating a guy who said he was "separated" from his wife but not yet divorced. He and her dated like it was no problem. I have no intention of remarrying. Ever. I'll be dating for the rest of my life. If she drags out the divorce, when problems are there if I date other women in this time?
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/19 05:52 PM
1

Get a lawyer now. Yea, I think that's the prudent thing to do before the next late night blow up. But for now I want to educate myself online as best I can before I walk into his office.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/19 09:45 PM
1

I'm reading that article now and trying to absorb it. What it's saying is that I should do an "in home separation" if I want primary custody of my kids? What if I just want 50-50 custody (not primary) of my 2 daughters -- who will be 18 and off at college soon? (One will be 18 in about 8 months, the other about 3.5 years) Staying in the house during a separation (when I can be happily living at my Dad's huge house) seems odd. Is that often done?
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/19 09:44 PM
1

arguments and chaos is her “safe space” it’s an environment she feels in control in, therefor she will actively seek it out. Thanks for the link for that subreddit (I'll read thru it) and thanks for pointing this out, it makes sense. As someone pointed out in my other thread, is it possible for a woman to show maybe some slight not-so-noticeable symptoms of BPD in her 20's, and then it grows bigger in her middle age years?
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/19 09:35 PM
1

it's not that rare in middle aged women. She had some occasional mood swings when we were dating, but not that bad. Is it common for BPD-like behavior to grow as women hit middle age? She's acting in ways that are more extreme versions of the occasional outburst she might have had when she was in her 20's. (If I saw a glint of this behavior, why did I marry her? Lots of social pressure back then to get married)
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/19 09:30 PM
1

it sounds like she's capable of extreme mood/personality swings Yes, this is correct. If I have to give any reason beyond "irreconcilable differences" it'll be something like "there was too much arguing, which is not good for the kids". Problem with that is that it sort of assumes both parties in the couple are at fault when in fact she was the one who would start arguments all the time, not me, but how do I convince people of that? (especially since she's usually pretty chill outside of the hom…
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/19 10:34 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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