neutronstarr Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
51	The Paradox of Toxic Behavior in Marriage	discussion	neutronstarr	/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates	02/06/21 01:14 PM

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
31	The “male” role in courtship is incredibly boring and frustrating. That's because acknowledging your own value and worth in a relationship would be perceived as misogynistic and egotistical if a man does it, but it's #empowering if a woman does it. In reality, both parties should be able to soberly assess their own value without making their entire relationship a proving grounds for some age-old gender war.	/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates	28/06/21 06:16 PM
120	The “male” role in courtship is incredibly boring and frustrating. It is fascinating to consider how this phenomenon plays out in long-term relationships too. My wife and I have had various arguments about who is supposed to benefit from mutual holidays like Valentine's Day or wedding anniversaries. I always argue that those days are for both of us; they are not a holiday I am supposed to do for her. This kind of asymmetry is deeply socialized in many married women. They see affection, admiration, gifts, romance, and the like as things men do for women. If I we…	/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates	28/06/21 12:08 PM
1	The Paradox of Toxic Behavior in Marriage Honestly, the chocolate cake probably helped. The neurochemistry of the brain is a complicated thing, and smoothing a difficult conversation over with the reward of comforting food is a fascinating approach. Either way, this is brilliant. And I agree -- the brain follows certain pre-carved cognitive paths (See Default Mode Network) and I think many women are operating on toxic programming that they don't understand themselves.	/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates	04/06/21 12:54 PM
2	Huh "The oppressor class" is a gross generalization, because in reality the "class" is no class at all. There is a vast difference between the men with influence and power and capital, and the vast majority of men who have none. The notion of lumping all men across history into one "oppressor class" is absurd. I have more in common with the black woman working at my bank than I do with Jeff Bezos. Just because he and I are both white men, it does not mean we are inextricably bound by solidarity in i…	/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates	03/06/21 08:31 PM
2	The Paradox of Toxic Behavior in Marriage Two kids and little resources. If I had more money, I'd probably leave immediately.	/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates	03/06/21 06:32 PM
1	The Paradox of Toxic Behavior in Marriage Agreed. One of the most egregious versions of laundering-abuse-as-normal is the phrase, "if the wife/mother isn't happy, no one's happy." It's considered a cute platitude, but it reveals a kind of emotional hostage-taking in the household. It's not okay. It's pure toxicity.	/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates	03/06/21 04:28 PM
4	The Paradox of Toxic Behavior in Marriage A curious thing -- I started going to therapy and my wife insisted that I should not talk to my therapist about our marriage because it's "not fair." She feels the same way about me talking to friends about our marriage issues. We've tried marriage counseling and she quit after the therapist corrected her on name-calling during a session.	/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates	02/06/21 03:56 PM
9	The Paradox of Toxic Behavior in Marriage Your assertions are undeniably true. She is deeply, deeply insecure in many ways. I suppose she uses our arguments to shore up her insecurity. It's taking a toll on me.	/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates	02/06/21 01:48 PM
13	The Paradox of Toxic Behavior in Marriage I suppose you're right. Considering that I care a lot about social justice issues, she may just be leveraging my own values against me. "So you call yourself an ally....?!?!?!" It's the spiritual and moral equivalent of wrenching someone's arm behind their back. Calling someone a sexist for purely weaponized purposes is a tactic to use their values against them.	/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates	02/06/21 01:44 PM
2	This frame of mind that when a couple fights, the guy has to sleep on the couch or leave the house and stay at a hotel is extremely sexist. In my observation, When a man cheats, it's his fault. When a woman cheats, it's her husband's fault. Either path leads to the husband taking a deferential and apologetic posture.	/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates	02/06/21 01:07 PM
2	This frame of mind that when a couple fights, the guy has to sleep on the couch or leave the house and stay at a hotel is extremely sexist. The tricky part about this is that the word "nag" will be perceived as sexist, even if its 100% true. There is a paradox wherein a wife is allowed to act toxic in certain ways, and you are a raging sexist if you observe and acknowledge that behavior.	/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates	02/06/21 01:04 PM
4	When he does the bare minimum In fact, the notion that he does these things and that makes him a "catch" might make infidelity more likely...	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	27/05/21 12:17 PM
35	I love this sub for work vetting I'm a firm believer that men can be profiled and analyzed by the men their follow, just like people often talk about zodiac signs. Jordan Peterson. Joe Rogan. Elon Musk. Ben Shapiro. Sam Harris. Tristan Harris. Yuval Noah Harari. Dax Shepard. Ezra Klein. Ask any man what they think of these guys and you can narrow down your field from there. Some of them are good, and some are not. But young men in particular have to follow someone -- they have to be guided by some philosophies and principles. L…	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	21/05/21 07:31 PM
413	Hmmm.. I wonder why this is? This is also speaks to the pickme mentality of engaging in casual hookups. Because if the pickme isn't experiencing satisfaction, they are obviously pursuing hookups for some other reason -- namely, the validation they get from LVM attention.	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	21/05/21 04:55 PM