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oobertas Archive

View 6 posts and 874 comments by oobertas on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

There just aren't enough upvotes to give this.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/22 06:33 PM
1

how do I stop learn from, and move past, my anger from showing?
/r/askMRP02/05/22 01:03 PM
6

What's the best part about being the problem?
/r/askMRP29/04/22 09:18 PM
1

Sounds like you did end up where I have. I was there when I confronted her and have stayed there. She could fuck another guy today and it wouldn't change the way I evaluate her which is simply: is this chick worth the time, money, and effort? But it might change how she fares in that evaluation. But there wouldn't be anything going on in my head like "I deserve X!" or "How could you do this to me?!" It would just be data. There'd be no anger because there's no oneitis and I have killed my ego (o…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/22 05:07 PM
1

I think your last sentence is contradictory. Outcome independence doesn't exist when it is outcome dependent. What's in it for your ego to think that you have it rougher? What use is the line of that thinking to you?
/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/22 01:47 AM
1

It doesn't matter what she told me or why. It only matters what I did and do with my own thoughts. This is why it was unnecessary for me to have this conversation with her.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/22 07:08 PM
6

Couple a basic things to remember. Watch what she does, not what she says. My wife will say words that assert her position on occasion, but we all know that when a person does that, it's out of insecurity. I just ignore all that and watch what she does. I will create space in the relationship, and my wife will make bids to close the gap. I will respond with acceptance of that bid, but an invitation to do it on my terms (sex, play, cuddles, whatever). If she rejects that, fine. I simply reset and…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/12/21 06:03 PM
5

I meant all at once.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/12/21 12:21 AM
1

Yes, adding magnesium and subtracting alcohol dramatically improve my sleep. TRT has further helped. In controlling stress inputs, I am learning that training with submaximal weights is essential and step loading is sometimes far more valuable than wave progression. Also, autoregulating with RPE has been key. Jim Wendler and Dan John have been my gurus on these items.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 10:20 PM
3

You do you. I myself am trying to stop the recurrence of episodes of extreme fatigue (including illness, injury, falling asleep at the wheel). What I'm doing: - Testosterone replacement therapy - Never missing my protein macro (even if it means exceeding caloric macro because of overeating other macros) - Downregulating my training during periods of increased work stress or sleep loss - Light cardio and yoga on non-lifting days - Magnesium at night What I'm after is having such discipline and co…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 09:33 PM
2

So you're rebooting here. Cool. Fine. What's the deal with the contrast of you blaming lack of emotional control on exhaustion versus your allegedly killing it with your "training regimen"?
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 07:15 PM
3

I'm shit at soccer. Who fucking cares? How are you at having fun even while doing things you're shit at. That's what an abundant man does.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 07:10 PM
1

Make no mistake, you're not "making" your wife watch Die Hard. She wants to watch it and imagine fucking John McClane as much as my wife (and every woman) does.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 06:59 PM
1

Per BLS, alcohol metabolizes to fat when consumed with fat and sugar. Alcohol also stops protein synthesis. That little splurge was a punch to my own dick.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 06:54 PM
1

John McClane, master of frame. Never contradicts even opponents. Always seeking information, understanding and best application of leverage. Hard on himself in private. Seld-validator. Has enough fun to laugh in crisis. Every woman wants to fuck that. Turns out he has no comfort and is motivated by an overdeveloped sense of duty. Every person in his life wants to leave that.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 05:56 PM
2

Mine was night after Christmas. Three glasses of wine. Three pieces of fudge. Next morning (yesterday), felt fat. Lifted, fasted. Day after (today), back to normal. Lifted again. Eating clean.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 05:48 PM
3

You even vaguely acknowledge being vague. LOL
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 05:46 PM
2

Okay. Consider picking one of those things above to work on until next week.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 05:38 PM
1

When you get good at praise, it won't matter how impressive what they do is. Praise builds rapport. Rapport creates the opportunity for influence and manipulation. Influence and manipulation make you a more effective leader of others and can net you value in status, time, and resources.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 05:36 PM
2

Wouldn't a real alpha have banged all the mom's on Christmas ;-)
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 05:12 PM
1

Okay, so it looks like you might be entering a period of what you called "low motivation" with sex. Some things to look out for: 1) Is this real, or is this your ego settling for what it has not been able to accomplish? Ego is a crafty bitch. Genuine NGAF can be great. Unreal NGAF is poison. 2) Are you boring with sex? Are you "getting what you want" because what you "want" is boring because you've never explored/experimented here? It's fine to be boring, I suppose. But being boring has conseque…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 05:09 PM
2

A couple times last week I was an emotional wreck on the inside. I could go into what I think it’s from but it doesn’t matter. In a nutshell, my problem is that I’m desperate for some type of finish line (especially as I approach OYS 52) This exactly why I stopped regular OYSing and no longer keep track of how many. Sure, for ingraining a habit and gaining discipline, process goals can be helpful. But seeking that grand dopamine hit from a "milestone" is just undoing the discpline (which doesn't…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 04:57 PM
6

I am stuck between DNGAF about someone else's feelings, and I need to generate feelz somehow. I can relate. It has been a 3-step process for me. Step 1: slow my racing mind down with DNGAF. Step 2: understand that her feelz are my tools. Step 3: experiment. I have found in my experiments that I am congruent with and enjoy a less-is-more approach. I leave blanks for her hamster to fill. That has required that I really trust and test the idea that the hamster is on my team. That has resulted in th…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 04:50 PM
2

Venting? Yuck.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 04:44 PM
3

Never "just for the fuck of it." Sometimes, I do it precisely because I want to get the pussy very wet and increase her anxiety to a point whre she craves release. But I don't need to "fight" her to trigger her. And once she's triggered, the work is usually done, and I move on to my next move - which could be as much as a day away (and could be yet another trigger). Fighting is actually counterproductive to that. Engaging in a "fight" kills the polarity. It puts you both in the same frame - one …
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 02:48 PM
8

I feel like you're further along than to do the stupid let's fight thing. A dude who knows what he is doing can take her bid to talk about sex and turn it into sex. That you didn't means you're frustrated. You've got a covert contract in there.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/21 01:56 PM
1

Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. OP, your wife likes seamen semen.
/r/askMRP27/12/21 10:50 PM
2

https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/ge79vq/why_you_must_be_willing_to_nuke_your_nuclear/
/r/askMRP27/12/21 10:33 PM
4

Try searching "dread into desire" on the main sub, retard. If you think STFU is all you can do, you've locked yourself in a retarded prison.
/r/askMRP27/12/21 06:38 PM
10

Wife might be projecting about her own desire for strange. People with enormous egos, especially women, are easily triggered at the slightest hint that someone else is doing what they themselves are doing but outwardly would say they'd "never do." None of it matters. If you like your wife and if you are owning your shit, you should be able to tell her to knock off the bullshit with the ex without mate guarding and, when she hamsters about your communications with other women, you should be able …
/r/askMRP27/12/21 05:51 PM
3

We don't know how fat she is.
/r/askMRP27/12/21 05:06 PM
2

u/Tyred_Biggums, I think a ban might be good for this dude if he mentions how he looks to his girlfriend again.
/r/askMRP27/12/21 03:11 PM
1

Read WISNIFG. Use your right to change your mind. Stop looking for permission from us/her to do these things. Develop your frame.
/r/askMRP27/12/21 03:04 PM
9

I've read this twice and felt dumber each time. Why the fuck are you being exclusive? Why the fuck are you discussing it with her? Just do what you want most and get the fuck out of her frame and lose the oneitis. 3 mos. Is not an LTR. Spin plates. Since this very obvious advice eludes you, lift and sidebar.
/r/askMRP27/12/21 07:46 AM
5

To clarify, a "branch swing" is when she has already established the next relationship while in the previous one. There is no "making space" to find another one. She's already found one and is holding on to them both. "Making space" means letting go of the prior one.
/r/askMRP27/12/21 01:17 AM
13

15 months of nightly late-night drinking? How fat are you, drunk captain?
/r/askMRP27/12/21 12:05 AM
11

I'm going with your username on this one. Jesus, man. Wake the fuck up.
/r/askMRP24/12/21 04:41 AM
1

Dude, you and I are on a wavelength. I could've written that first post you linked myself. I found the power of curiosity in doing some CBT and NLP I read about for anger. Those led me to lever anger. I later did the same for depressive episodes. Following Blart has shown me the way to Taoism where curiosity is a spiritual virtue and an essential way to interact with a universe that is inherently spontaneous, like a playful sparring partner. Great posts. Have you done a big FR on this in the mai…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/12/21 07:07 PM
1

Word. By give, I meant effort. I don't speak sacrifice.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/12/21 02:48 AM
1

Yep. The world has an abundance of gifts, but you must give first.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/12/21 02:44 AM
2

I like this. You're clearly at the center. Stay there. And expect more ups and downs. Re: her cheating, it's always just your turn. With her, or any other her.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/21 11:18 PM
4

Look, fucker, this is really pathetic. Can you even try to provide your own redpilled analysis of what transpired? If not, keep reading until you can. So fucking lazy. I feel like you should apologize to me too.
/r/askMRP22/12/21 11:02 PM
1

Sex is fun. Glad you're having fun with your turns. But your turns don't define you or your worth. Have the fun without it being a justification for your existence. It's just a bonus. Frosting on the cake.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/21 10:56 PM
1

How good are you at praise?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/21 10:52 PM
1

When you find yourself challenged to maintain discipline, what do you do?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/21 09:50 PM
1

u/Hornsofapathy, what is discipline to you?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/21 05:33 PM
1

Same. Previously, I would "reward" myself with booze. I've since revised by doing it with a huge lean steak cooked to perfection at my favorite steakhouse. Feel amazing after eating it. Or a professional massage. Trick is to keep the "rewards" things that preserve and assist gains, rather than "spend" them. Financially, I shave portions of a large fee and use it for my own fun financial trading, as opposed to going into my manager portfolio. With time, if I've been efficient, I'll reward myself …
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/21 04:46 PM
1

By play, I mean engaging in a task in a way where your enjoyment of how you influence the process does not depend on the outcome. (The outcome is assumed.) I most often do this with my to-do list. I'll take a task I don't want to do and see if I can do it in half the time I ordinarily do, even if it's lower quality, when quality is not essential. Sometimes I take a very boring rudimentary transaction or case document and make it "perfect", just to enjoy giving that level of attention to it. I'll…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/21 02:26 PM
1

Your marriage/sex section has a whole lotta hamstering about whether you've "made it." Why? Are you looking to do the minimum and quit? Are these thoughts at all useful? What would be more useful?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/21 04:24 AM
2

💯. OP, by boiling the frog, we mean gradually increasing the kink so that she is unaware of the incremental increase. Horn's point about the potential for covert contract is that you start expecting x because you're doing y. Yes, eventually, if you are a man who fucks, you just have to take her.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/21 02:56 AM
5

This comment is the tits.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/21 02:47 AM
3

Some of these dudes are obsessed with Chad and Tyrone Fair. But probably not as obsessed as OP's fiancee'.
/r/askMRP22/12/21 02:42 AM
1

I don't think this is my experience. I think my experience is what you said first - i.e., being boring. When I achieve a decent goal, on occasion I'll do a binge like Rag mentions. The ego narrative is "it's fine. You deserve it. Besides, you've changed. You can handle a binge without being driven off course. You're disciplined." The next day/night it's "What's one more day in the scheme of things." This is when my ego is in it's irrational encouragement mode. That continues until my ego flips i…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/21 02:06 AM
1

Scarcity. Oneitis.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/21 12:07 AM
1

Yes. Boredom with progress. Contentment with small wins, as opposed to discipline in growing the wins.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/21 12:02 AM
1

I concur. It's a bit BP in places, but at least gives a paint-by-numbers for "boiling the frog."
/r/MarriedRedPill21/12/21 08:23 PM
8

This made me chuckle. About 6 mos. in on my MRP journey, my wife told me I "remind her of the guy she dated" (we met in college). She told me a few nights ago I am "the man she always wanted to marry." Man > guy.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/12/21 08:21 PM
2

Please stop asking SBIII to speak in non-absolutes. It's a crucial part of his game.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/12/21 08:18 PM
4

complacency I know for sure that I have a success->complacency->bad habits->bottoming-out->good habits->success loop. I haven't found a silver bullet for mine yet either.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/12/21 08:11 PM
4

I looked over this again during lunch and had some additional thoughts. You're very clearly in her frame. This is why you got "upset" with her as "emotionally closed off partner". Being "upset" means you lost control of yourself and the situation. It's the opposite of dominance. And it was her ability to close-off that took your control away. Or, better, that occaisoned you to give your control away. Since you're in her frame, it may help to describe to you what dominance looks like to her. Domi…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/12/21 08:02 PM
5

Let's break this down. I initiated around 1am on Friday morning. Some resistance, but pushed through. During sex, I said “you need to be fucked.” Then, I started to say it again. Good. You nudged a boundary and went right back to it again. Was met with an extremely sharp “stop.” I froze for a second, then continued silently. If by "continued silently" you mean you kept dominance and immersion physically, just without talking, good. If there was no difference in you physically before and after sh…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/12/21 03:54 PM
2

Nice an tidy from a guy who admits he's still angry. I wonder what's simmering.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/12/21 02:57 PM
3

Congrats. I can now be who I want to be. You have always had this freedom. It's always available to you.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/12/21 02:51 PM
3

Dude, the only thing - I mean THE ONLY THING - you should be working on right now is figuring out how to order your life, health, lifting, and diet to put on muscle. Definitely have your T -checked. Definitely compute your BMR and TDEE. Eat in a surplus. Lift heavy. Get on TRT if you need to. This will address 90% of the bullshit in your life.
/r/askMRP20/12/21 03:59 PM
17

Fuck, dude. Have you even read the Rational Male? You're a walking proof. You're not fit to LTR any woman without being kept the doormat that you are. Lift, sidebar, OYS. You're 100% correct to call off the engagement. But you need to go further and internalize the lessons of all of this. Let's say that she is in fact a "quality" girl. Well, by being a doormat, you have failed to groom her into your quality girl. Doing that on the other side of marriage is extremely difficult and potentially ver…
/r/askMRP20/12/21 03:55 PM
7

based on (loosely) a philosophy of extreme personal responsibility, hard work, and selfishness. even if it's not articulated as such, it's implied in damn near everything I read here. You are bringing that to your reading of MRP, which is why you think it's implied in this way. There is a container around your thoughts. (Like your assumption about sacrifice and virtue.). That's not per se bad or wrong. But posts like this (where a person is trying to reconcile these enormous thought structures a…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/12/21 05:28 PM
6

hairs to split here? Too many to count. Mad props for pushing further and deeper. I am curious to see where you take yourself on this path. Just some things that caught my eye: Does MRP not advocate optimizing influence? 48 LOP etc. certainly provide means for calibration. Learning covert communication also does. Have you possibly misread or misunderstood something of MRP if you have concluded that optimizing influence is not part of the core concepts/curricula? Is our relationship to the univer…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/12/21 03:31 PM
23

For those of you watching at home, when your wife says "You never treat me like a woman" it means you don't fuck her like a man.
/r/askMRP18/12/21 12:53 AM
4

This wins the internet today
/r/askMRP17/12/21 06:02 PM
1

Agreed. Calibrating drive with NGAF is its own process. Stay with it.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/12/21 09:26 PM
2

He'll be an incel if he keeps this bullshit up.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/12/21 09:25 PM
3

You're punking on a straw man. You are ignorant of what MRP really is. You thus offer no value.
/r/askMRP16/12/21 02:21 PM
11

Worst post ever.
/r/askMRP16/12/21 03:34 AM
1

acquire some abundance How are you going to do that?
/r/MarriedRedPill15/12/21 10:50 PM
2

Because, at the end of the day, if I’m valuable and selective about my company, the sex will follow. I know you're communicating a general RP/MRP truism here, but I hope you see the covert contract you have in it and are working on that. You also have to be OI - meaning accepting of the fact that sex will *not* follow, and be prepared to take measures to satisfy your needs and desires.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/12/21 07:48 PM
13

Sounds like that time you want to waste looking for new angles would be better spent under the bar.
/r/askMRP15/12/21 01:28 PM
1

Stop being reactive from external inputs and start acting on internal desires.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/12/21 09:31 AM
3

Oh, that's what you meant. Well, I can't help a fucking incel.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/12/21 01:56 AM
1

Fatherhood is making you soft. ;-)
/r/MarriedRedPill15/12/21 12:35 AM
1

I can't lie that it hasn't made home life more tolerable right now. Ass-on-demand makes it easier to focus on other areas. So she's dolling out sex to try and soften your edge, huh? ​ Since I haven't been able to prove anything going physical, I don't feel like a total cuck. Seems to be working. ​ get some much needed abundance in my life What does this mean?
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 11:19 PM
3

I go into these dates not even knowing what I want. There's a lot of opportunity in this mindset, dude, that you're not mining. Going in without expectation is ultimate outcome independence and it opens (or it can open) you to the spontaneity of the moment. You're enough, with or without stupid expectations. Go enjoy yourself being yourself with someone else. It's that easy.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 11:13 PM
1

smooth sailing ... is boring sailing.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 11:08 PM
3

From MRP Rules OYS Violation: Whining About 3rd Party Actions OYS is about taking ownership of the things YOU control, not about other parties like your wife, dog, boss, etc. .... You are complaining about a situation you willingly put yourself into. That's a no go. (Standard ban duration :: 15 days.) Excerpts from your OYS I had a reaction with a friend. This created a cascade of my friend talking about shit about relationships I could not even remember what he said. I was lost in his speech, a…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 08:29 PM
3

it’s when I’m coming from a place of honesty and openness, with no expectation of reciprocity That's abundance. Find more ways to operate from there in more aspects of your life.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 07:27 PM
4

These are all expressions of your drive. What is it that you are doing during these expressions that is effortless and seems "right" and "connected"?
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 07:16 PM
1

This is all Rule 10. You're not even the subject/agent in your own life here.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 07:14 PM
2

It's really a hard habit to learn - i.e., not lone-wolfing and instead recruiting others. But it's the real difference between leaders and loners.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 07:08 PM
1

u/ImpatientZen's advice on praise is spot-on, I think. Your observation about you holding back praise I think is perceptive. Do you see how there's a fear of loss involved there? Do you see how that fear of loss is scarcity? Do you see how being abundant is so easy when scarcity threatens? (It literally costs you nothing to say a few words of praise.) Are there other parts of your thinking/life where scarcity threatens and you can respond similarly (i.e., with an easy offering that costs you not…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 07:05 PM
1

Implemented STFU properly for the first time yesterday, if a little spergy with it. It's so autistic, right? Keep it up. Play with it and enjoy the found time and mental space it produces. When you start easing-off STFU, instead of just going back to talking, play with winks, nods, smiles, and facial expressions. Then see how far you can go with just one word answers. Over time, people see that you're playing a bit of a game, and a lot of them like it - especially if you're smiling a lot. If you…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 06:59 PM
1

It is fantastic that my GF rarely refuses my initiations and I genuinely have got to the point that I can relax when she does, because I know she finds me attractive and there will always be more sex. However, deep down it still bothers me a little, because despite knowing I am attractive, I am not confident in my ability to get other women to sleep with me. In fact, fuck it, whilst we are on the subject, let's put it out there that I would like to sleep with other woman, though I am not entirel…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 06:55 PM
1

I cannot fix the marriage directly. I can only enhance myself, for myself. Still a covert contract in there. Do you see it?
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 06:53 PM
1

Finals It's all a test. But the test isn't against you. It's a test to determine what you have to give and how you will give it. You are now giving it appreciation. Don't be surprised if that comes back to you.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 04:46 PM
3

You will vacillate back to anger until you can find a new source of energy. OP, I can corroborate. Complacency will set in and you will regress. When you regress, you choose anger again just to get back out of the hole. You have to find a "rocket fuel" that is not anger. Discipline is key. But you need mission too. What do you find drives you?
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 02:48 PM
1

Sounds like you tried to fuck the way you thought she wanted, at the time you thought she wanted, and up the standard that you thought she wanted....not surprised it did not work out the first time. Exactly what I thought too. But props, OP, for getting back up after stumbling. There's no weakness or failure when you can do that. Also, the other comments about you being stuck in her frame are spot on. Observe how you're disturbed by her obviously contradictory statements. She's a woman. She's ei…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 02:39 PM
4

Congrats on baby and belt.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/12/21 02:13 PM
1

If he's attractive, he won't care if it "works."
/r/askMRP14/12/21 01:07 AM
9

Again, that's only the solution if your wife's a man. You definitely have to set overt boundaries on occasions. But women need to be led and grow through praise. Criticism often just triggers their fragile egos and gets the hamster on coming up with reasons why you suck. It's not that they don't deserve criticism often; it's just that they don't respond to it the way a man does (which seems to be what you're expecting). You need to lead (i.e., model the behavior you approve of) and praise her wh…
/r/askMRP13/12/21 08:22 PM
2

the solution is not just telling her openly that this is damaging for everybody Not unless your wife is a man.
/r/askMRP13/12/21 07:53 PM
13

No lifting. No fucking. And wife is harpy. What do you not understand?
/r/askMRP13/12/21 05:19 PM
1

just focus on you and getting what you want, then you will. Or, focus on giving what you want to give, then you will.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/12/21 02:26 PM
1

It's starting to be very clear. You like a bit of chase and challenge. getting my laundry done and folded is great, it adds value ... her doing that willingly without me asking is not attractive. I don't fully understand that, to be honest. It's unattractive because she's submitting without any resistance, right? The anal wasn't a deep desire for me to be frank, but more of a what can I do to test myself and whether I can lead to that direction if I wanted to. I can relate 💯. The exhilaration is…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/12/21 02:23 PM
3

Cost of doing business.
/r/askMRP11/12/21 08:25 PM
15

Stats? save a low sex marriage Why "save" it? No kids, right?
/r/askMRP11/12/21 03:06 PM
2

the "women ain't shit" rabbit-hole of Red Pill Ultimately, it's defensive, which of course holds back a man from being himself. Worse, it limits his mind by discouraging him from considering that he can source value from women. Finally, it fails to recognize all the gifts the universe gives under the auspices of women. The coolest thing about getting out of that rabbit hole is that you can look all around you, see the BP/Disney matrix at work and, with nothing but your own wits, use it to your a…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/12/21 11:29 PM
1

It's tricky. I get pretty intense battles with fatigue. The last one began when diet and fitness were on point, but shouldn't have been intense enough for overtraining. So, I started TRT. Think it's helping, but still early.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/12/21 10:55 PM
1

Did you edit your OYS's mention of you doing that? Are you covering it up? Why?
/r/MarriedRedPill10/12/21 09:53 PM
1

Seriously? No one made the semen joke?
/r/MarriedRedPill10/12/21 02:14 AM
1

Do you happen to have a red button on your chest?
/r/MarriedRedPill10/12/21 01:23 AM
1

When a man truly gives a gift, it is nonsensical for him to pray to a higher power that it will be accepted by the recipient.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/12/21 10:44 PM
0

From your OYS, it looks like it's all your wife's fault, including the way you injure your kid while playing dodgeball to impress her. Fucking retarded to a comic level. If you're not trolling, then you are really a true troll.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/12/21 09:04 PM
1

There exists a beautiful life outside the economics-centric nature of the red pill, outside gender dynamics, and outside the functional duty of a man within society. The biggest skill I learned throughout my stay here was self-awareness, and while there has been other useful ones, the ones that don't complement my current life organically weeded themselves out. If you think this contradicts the bulk of MRP mainstream, then I think you've got a distorted take or focus with MRP.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/12/21 09:02 PM
1

Women-wise … Part of me is thinking I’m attracted to chaos. This past week or two I noticed that things were “fine” with the “LTR,” but I wasn’t into having sex much. I remember a couple of nights I thought, man I hope she doesn’t initiate. Sex was still great. I was offered blowjobs. But to me it felt like a chore somehow. BUT. When tensions came… fuck. Next level. It was like a mutual desire for ravaging... I'm not sure why there was a waning in that feeling. It was a busy week, so I didn’t re…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/12/21 08:58 PM
1

Might get Rule 9’d again but you know what I am proud of the tiny amounts of masculinity I’m regaining. Yes, you will get rule 9ed. And you're proud of it? I hope you get the cookie you're dancing so hard for, little monkey.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/12/21 08:51 PM
1

I still don't get why it's a part of your OYS or apparent mission. Endeavoring so stridently to "awaken" people to your particular line of thinking is hyper outcome dependent and very nice guy validation-seeking. What was it someone said about offering your peace and shaking the dust from your sandals?
/r/MarriedRedPill09/12/21 07:59 PM
1

I did. Early in my journey, I set alarms and did post game/resets throughout the day. Did it like 4 times a day for several months. Learned a ton about my fears and their unreality. Learned I have enormous emotional control, if I only use it.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/12/21 01:32 AM
2

I bought some vneck long-sleeve undershirts so I can keep wearing some of my warmer weather long-sleeve shirts and not be as limited with the winter wardrobe. Invested in some nice full zip cardigans too to contrast with business shirts.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 07:22 PM
1

If you really and truly are at that peace, then congrats. That's certainly a milestone. Your sex-dependent intimacy betrays that, though.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 07:14 PM
2

unlock it IF I can get to whatever level of attractiveness is required. Yep. I know. Pretty standard covert contract on that really. Steams you to know your little slut has been even sluttier for a more alpha Chad. You're competing with him. He was not competing with anyone, which gives him an insurmountable advantage on you. I honestly don't know what the fuck I look like. That's why I posted a picture. You see the idiocy of learning what you look like by asking others, right? Spend some time b…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 05:19 PM
2

fully replace that I know and have experienced this. I went from angry to conquering to not giving any fucks and am now newly at giving my gifts. It took a very long while to find drive without anger. And it has been tempting at times to gin up some anger to get some drive going. But that would be choosing regression.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 04:18 PM
1

Be more Alpha than God.
/r/askMRP08/12/21 04:10 PM
1

grabbing at my cock It takes a while to develop it, but eventually with experience, you'll get to a point where you'll remind yourself that her behavior and test is nothing but a wet pussy. Hopefully you know what to do with that.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 03:55 PM
2

Lots of good planning, but looks like execution has been inconsistent.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 03:28 PM
2

A good transition to conscious choice with emotional reaction is to replace all initial emotional reaction with curiosity - not "why do I feel x," but "how else could I feel about this."
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 03:22 PM
1

"Scoring a hit," as in an addict working for the next high.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 03:06 PM
2

Lies. Damn lies. Suppose you're right about it, but that doesn't explain the need to communicate it to her. That need is your weakness and dependency on sex from her. And your communication of this quid pro quo is how you try to score hits.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 01:08 PM
5

u/Along-The-Reeds doesn't have to look for it. It's staring him in the face: anger about her affair He hasn't made a decision about it in the way a man decides things (i.e., putting the past forever in the past). He is holding on to something. Perhaps an entitlement to victimhood or a moral trumpcard he's saving for a grand play. That strategy may cost him the game. Things he's probably thinking but not saying here: I look past her affair and she still rejects my initiations? The nerve! She's re…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 10:28 AM
2

With a quality enough woman and enough value yourself, you can mine everything you want. And with enough genuine abundance, that's more than enough, as far as women are concerned.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 10:13 AM
5

feeling of emptiness Substantial loss feels like emptiness at first. If you are carrying an enormous weight and remove half of it your hands feel empty at first. But soon, you recalibrate and are conscious again of what you're carrying.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 10:07 AM
3

White-knighting vax fears with prayer, huh? Sounds preachy af. And unattractive.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 10:01 AM
2

Sex is the door to create and maintain and emotional relationship with me. "If you want intimacy, fuck me first." Negotiating desire like a terrorist. Repulsive.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 09:55 AM
2

Ultimatums are dumb and disempowering and in her frame. Simply state what you want and silently prepare to be able to move swiftly with your contingency plan. Offering forgiveness to coax an admission is also dumb and in her frame. You can forgive without an apology or admission. Or, you can just end it now. What she says or chooses doesn't matter. I've already shared this with you. Maybe you're thinking of doing something similar. Are you really OI enough to do it? (You aren't coming off like y…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 09:07 AM
1

Jesus. You're a fucking mess. I get it. Possibility of cheating is fucking with you. Maybe do what I did: convince yourself with certainty that she cheated and evaluate what you want to do from there. Make your fears real in your mind and discover they're just dissipating phantoms. Then, live free from their threats.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 03:17 AM
1

How (i.e., what) are you doing about that enormous covert contract you saw a few weeks ago? You know, the one where you were so hot you were entitled to anal? Honestly, you seem smack dab in the middle of it still.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 02:50 AM
2

practicing poverty When I find my affinity for the Benjamins is getting absurd, I literally take a sum of cash that "hurts" to lose, put it in an envelope, write "good luck!" on it, go for a walk, and leave it somewhere to be found by someone else.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 02:25 AM
3

Just sex. Now, depress the acceleratrix. Keep going.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 02:18 AM
1

^ good advice
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 02:15 AM
2

😂
/r/askMRP06/12/21 05:50 PM
2

And beyond acceptance is gratitude.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/12/21 09:11 PM
1

😂
/r/askMRP04/12/21 03:04 PM
1

So, you can't change your mind because she will shit test you? Can't she shit test you anyway? Is shit testing something to avoid? What do your responses to these questions reveal to you about your thinking?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/12/21 01:28 AM
1

You twice say that because you said/did x in the past, you must do x now. Are you not able to change your mind?
/r/MarriedRedPill02/12/21 08:53 PM
2

have to follow through You mention this twice. There's a weird mindfuck in there that may be worth examining. If you are the god of your life, can you really create a boulder so big you can't lift it?
/r/MarriedRedPill02/12/21 04:20 PM
1

I used to think that having a stable job that paid the bills and allowed me to save comfortably to subsist after retirement was desirable … but if my life is not satisfying while saving for that potential future then what’s the fucking point? I’m open to much more risk here. What is the connection among job and risk and "satisfaction" for you? scarcity mindset from childhood that I have to keep fending off How are you feeling it off? Are you avoiding what you don't want (i.e., scarcity), or are …
/r/MarriedRedPill02/12/21 04:15 PM
1

Correct. My comment was to assist OP in getting value from all the comments. It was not directed at you.
/r/askMRP02/12/21 04:05 PM
2

u/DiamondUnlucky9120, the warm feeling of acceptance and motivation you feel at the words of u/rockstarsheep is because he has just filled you with validation. He did that either because a) he expects and needs validation in return from you or b) he can generate so much validation for himself that he has an abundant surplus of it and can share it freely with no strings attached. He said you're a "good man". I don't know what that means. Could mean you are type a), which makes you a "nice guy," w…
/r/askMRP02/12/21 03:50 PM
1

SG's good stuff. There are some similar subreddits. I think it's interesting that you have removal of porn to open up sex. I did the opposite. Started sending her porn, unapologetically and openly showing I'm the bigger freak. She filled that container nicely.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/11/21 06:33 PM
4

Check out Thundercat
/r/MarriedRedPill24/11/21 05:20 PM
6

it's just confidence Given our mortality and vulnerability, isn't all confidence irrational at bottom? But then, that's exactly what makes it "right," right? This is your one go. Extrinsic justifications are just dead weight. What seemed irrational before is perfectly sensible now. Very cool that you embraced it and it has led to a better frame. Hold to it! You know it will get tested! Thanks for sharing and inspiring.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/11/21 03:51 PM
-2

That was an down-the-fairway MRP post without any religious take. Going ad hominem was your concession to the point being made. But failing to concede the point openly tells an ego investment in a decision you have made for yourself which is threatened by others not making that same decision. Your advice about choosing words is good. It would've helped you on this last comment.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/11/21 11:42 AM
1

What attachment? If you're fine with the legal consequences of not doing something that you are legally obligated to do, then you are free of the obligation, regardless of whether you have another piece of paper saying there is no more legal obligation. Freedom is not defined by law. You don't need a divorce decree to tell you the "marriage" doesn't exist. I came to this point early in my journey and a few months later overtly redefined the nature of my relationship with my wife. She thought I w…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/11/21 11:12 AM
1

This is the case for 0 of the guys here I'm not as pessimistic. But if you can't see it, I don't blame you for not seeing it. how high you can soar. Relative to what other ego--powered scoreboard? Riddle me this: What's the downside to having 100% legally protected ownership of the fruits of your own labor? Just the defensive attachment to said fruits and said protection, I suppose. But, like I said, if you can't see the downside to that, I don't blame you for not seeing it.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/11/21 10:42 AM
1

Just be mindful you don't parrot boilerplate shit originating from your own hamster, leading dudes astray. It's a good point, though recall I advised that he "at least" max his value and vet the shit out of her. I didn't recommend he sign paper with her or anyone. My comment to Horns was definitely half-baked post hoc rationalization. As far as I can tell, even if you keep your woman around, it is in your best interest to legally divorce after you swallow the pill. What's the point of increasing…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/11/21 08:26 AM
1

my sexual imagination has been improving dramatically since I dropped porn. If that's true, it's fascinating. I use porn to get my imagination going.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 11:29 PM
2

This is funny. Yes, the no-paper being hard for her, which would make it hard on you dealing with her anxiety was what I was thinking about the "pick your hard." But after I wrote that comment, I went to lunch and had several boring meetings. During all that I started pondered about whether I had made that comment as a post-hoc justification for my own marriage. I ultimately concluded that I did, and then I started asking myself if there is any scenario where an RP guy should consciously have th…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 09:56 PM
1

Fear of what?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 07:28 PM
1

It's perfectly fine and good to want more good things. But it's insane to be angry, resentful, and dejected when you don't get what you want.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 07:15 PM
1

Why are you not ready?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 06:48 PM
1

But you've already proven to yourself that giving you a quantity of time can be wasted. So, it's easy to see it's the quality that matters, isn't it? And for that, you only need today.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 06:44 PM
1

Agreed. The paper makes it harder. Pick your hard.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 04:25 PM
2

Upside is the value of a good FO and the challenge of/growth in leading one and delegating to her. Maybe/probably not for everyone. Why choose her? I don't know if he should. Just advising that he only choose one woman when that woman is willing and able to be every woman to him. Maybe this one isn't.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 04:18 PM
4

I use fat grips on warm-up and lighter worksets, but when I'm max testing, AMRAPing, or doing higher rep sets, I use belt and straps. No substitute for stressing your body with heavy weight, grip strength be damned.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 04:11 PM
1

Your training needs to focus around removing your weaknesses, while improving your strengths. Sage
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 04:08 PM
5

Dude, in a way you don't seem to understand, OP's post is especially for you. Hint: see u/RStonePT's comment above.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 04:03 PM
1

Or, he should consider at least holding off until 1) he's a man who can congruently expect her best in everything and 2) she demonstrates her ability and willingness to give it.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 03:54 PM
2

starfish You can address starfish with a really light touch. If you notice her not following your lead on intensity/enthusiasm, you can just decide that starfish sex isn't worth your time and energy. You don't make a big announcement about that. You just kiss her forehead, tell her something sweet, pull out and walk-away/go-to-bed without buthurt while saying something like 'it's just not clicking tonight." With that, you're raising your own standard, enforcing that standard, and implicitly aski…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 03:50 PM
2

I need to kill that shitty behavior. I have no plan how to handle it though. The good thing is that I am aware of it. Right now I am sticking to lifting and doing my part in making other people's lives less miserable This stuck out and looks familiar to me. I have had two of these phases doing MRP. Both of mine were triggered by fear after injury/illness - fear that I couldn't get back to owning my shit. That fear exposed the covert contract that I have still been working for others' appreciatio…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 02:38 PM
8

Sex isn't and doesn't always have to be like this by the way. Key advice there. Sex suffers when you're trying to "recreate" a past experience rather than staying present and working with what's in front of you - that's when spontaneity offers itself (sometimes quite subtly).
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/21 02:03 PM
6

Your serial posts are like watching retardation exacerbate realtime. Perfect is the enemy of what's good. You are so afraid. That's your problem. Can you identify what you're afraid of? (I think I know what it is.) Can you accept it and take risks in light of it?
/r/askMRP21/11/21 02:03 PM
1

Okay, your questions about seeking "more frame," whether she is trying "to establish her frame over mine," and "how to punish" tell us how you're misunderstanding frame as a contest between you and her. It's not. If you really have frame, you needn't get "more," you invite her into your frame, and you effectively discipline (not punish). You've been reading Meditations and 48 Laws of Power. Why have you seemingly not learned the applicable lessons of each? Are you just raw and lashing out?
/r/askMRP21/11/21 10:02 AM
1

You're turning this into the blame (yourself) game. That's missing it. She's always responsible for her actions. You just fail the tests when you allow those actions to affect how you want to be. In other words, responsibility doesn't pass from one of you to the other. You both are responsible for your own actions, which includes your frame and mood.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/11/21 05:31 AM
2

I know you're trying to do a postgame analysis on this shopping thing, but I can't tell if you're getting anything out of it. Let's break it down. So, you set boundary with the budget. She - being the well-evolved woman she is - identified the boundary as an opportunity to test you. You didn't know how to act externally or internally when she deployed the test. You disappointed yourself. And thus you failed. This is a very basic and classic shit test. The test has nothing to do with what she doe…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/11/21 05:54 PM
1

😂
/r/MarriedRedPill19/11/21 04:22 PM
3

This whole thing is sad and dumb. You're so needy for validation sex that it oozes from your words. achieve abundance Do you think abundant men view abundance as an achievement? This is such a fucked mental model. Huge covert contract. I know how you did it. You read the PUA-inspired stuff and said "I I achieve abundance, x will result." Do you see why this is error?
/r/MarriedRedPill19/11/21 04:19 PM
3

This is art. Thanks
/r/MarriedRedPill19/11/21 04:08 PM
1

I think that's the value. Me too. Let me be clear. I really do appreciate the congruence test. That really was, and continues to be, helpful. What you read just wasn't the case. No need to stop or adjust. Can't hit 'em all. It happens. It's fine. The information that you can make your wife's legs shake is irrelevant in the context of this OYS (and even more so in the context of that paragraph, which was about self-improvement). Why did you include it? That's just the way I write/talk. You've com…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/21 08:24 PM
1

To elaborate a bit more, last night I had one of the most social nights I've had in the last couple of months. Since MRP, in situations like that I would ordinarily approach with mayor game etc. But last night, I just decided to focus on my gifts and sharing them. And it was very, very satisfying experience. I learned a lot about myself, I got some new insight about other ways of thinking/doing, and I shared my own ways of the same. Conversations were very intimate, talking about very intimate s…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/21 07:58 PM
1

Much of what you say I agree with, but you're extrapolating further than I think is accurate. I'm not attacking. I don't think or say "everything's good in here ... no need to look around." Uber simply missed on something that has been profound insight produced from my gooey center, something he apparently hasn't yet consciously experienced. And that's okay. Maybe that's not for him. It's not an existential crisis for either of us. You're calling me out for DEERing. That's all fair and is possib…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/21 07:09 PM
1

Okay. I'll come out and play a bit. Unpacking this will be helpful for the two of us, and maybe for Uber and others who care to read. u/Ubermensch33's comments on how I described my gifts told me something about what he was bringing. From my plain and sincere description of my insights and experience with my gifts (as gifts that are not necessarily special or distinctive), he inferred that this must be a result of insufficient humility or insufficient self-love. What he missed is that its just a…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/21 05:14 PM
1

It was fitting. He was stabbing in the dark a bit and admittedly projecting. He simply needed confirmation feedback and that gift fit nicely there. Elaboration would have been distraction for us both.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/21 04:29 PM
1

We did exchange gifts. He said I'm coming off incongruent and admitted he wasn't sure of his read. I accepted that gift, checked if I was incongruent. I wasn't and I gave him the feedback on his read. Simple exchange. Didn't need frills.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/21 04:02 PM
2

How about you let us see what advice you give yourself, using the sidebar concepts?
/r/askMRP17/11/21 03:58 PM
7

You think the yard sub is going to give you better advice than your same posting of this shitty scene in OYS will yield? Boiled-down, your post is "My wife said words and demands a response. I'm afraid to lose. How do I respond?" If you can't see your own mental errors in how you've framed this question (and even the very need to ask it) you have learned nothing from the sidebar.
/r/askMRP17/11/21 02:28 PM
-1

Yeah, you missed it.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/11/21 01:29 AM
3

OYS++ Ugh. Dudes. Turns out I'm still a very retarded f@990+. My F@990+ry: I've waivered with drive since as early as August (but maybe earlier). I then got sick through all of August, September, and October. I kept lifting until one week in October when I hurt my abdomen squatting and just hit a wall a few days after. I let go of lifting and diet. I couldn't sleep well, and I constantly craved sleep. I fell behind at work. I fell behind at home. I frittered away what little energy I had in dist…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/21 10:52 PM
2

It is a weird kind of zen steering in to what you know will be a storm but also knowing that you will come out the other end stronger and wiser. This calm is a thread poking up from the wiser and deeper part of you that knows you could "fail" by the standards of the world (and of your shallower part) on all these "challenges" and you would still be fine. Pull on that thread.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/21 10:40 PM
1

bigger investment than marriage, than anything else in life really Big upside too. Congrats on fatherhood!
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/21 10:35 PM
2

“Dad, I’m always worried about disappointing Mom more than I’m worried about disappointing you.” "You should only fear disappointing yourself."
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/21 10:26 PM
3

So much hamstering about decisions already made. What about the vision ahead?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/21 10:14 PM
3

I don’t know who the fuck I am The opportunity of a lifetime.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/21 10:11 PM
2

Gained some abundance by fucking loads of women Ohhhh! Thaaaat's how you do that. Mind = blown.
/r/askMRP15/11/21 10:16 PM
1

The universe is abundant and you are not separate from the universe.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/11/21 06:26 PM
2

Guy realizes he hasn't been leading. Guy starts taking action to start leading. I'm all for that, even if it starts from her frame. Rooting for him to level up.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/11/21 07:03 AM
1

Seriously, dude. Read the fucking sidebar. start with The Rational Male. Also, read My Secret Garden to fully appreciate the depravity of the slut you have. She's waving red meat around. You don't know what to do with it? Want me to show you?
/r/askMRP14/11/21 02:16 AM
3

Typical advice is to read and implement Power of Now and Untethered Soul. I found both useful, though I tended to double my ego back on itself by having an ego investment in killing my ego, which is obviously retarded. I'm now finding success in meditation and mental models that emphasize life and action and de-emphasize self (e.g., zen and taoism).
/r/MarriedRedPill12/11/21 01:43 PM
1

my abundance external forces I'm confronted with are mostly moot These little phrases suggest you're seeing abundance as a quality of yourself. That's understandable and even common, I think, given how it's so often spoken of (e.g., "I'm abundant" or "I have abundance"). But abundance is about how you relate to everything else. The abundant person can be rich or poor, but they relate to things and others in the same way - those things and persons are all for them. "For" here means both "supporti…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/11/21 01:48 AM
1

OCD has concentrated a lot on my LTR and if I should continue it. This is common and often referred to as ROCD (Relationship OCD). I think the OCD is fuelled by my cowardice: if I wanted to end it, I don’t know if would have the balls, so my anxiety latches on to this: it tries to anticipate/prepare for the possibility of having to break-up, and in the process makes me want to break up just so the anxiety fades. But at the moment I have no reason to break up other than being a pussy. Do you see …
/r/MarriedRedPill11/11/21 06:34 PM
1

almost any situation can be made into something better with true OI and mindfulness getting me through nearly anything. This is close to abundance. Can you see the gap between this and abundance?
/r/MarriedRedPill11/11/21 06:23 PM
2

the problem I face is not that I don’t want to assert myself, it’s that I have lost my sense of self. I don’t know what I want for me, period. This is in sync with one of the question I have all the time when reading OYS : the mission statement. I have no idea what my “core mission” is. The latest one I had stated was to become stronger - and I still want to - but that’s not a mission, that’s a means to a goal. I don’t know what my goal is. Reaching abundance because this looks great, yeah. Stil…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/11/21 06:17 PM
1

Experiment. Reach beyond current retardation.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/11/21 05:34 PM
6

I think if there's a key lesson for the other dudes reading this OYS and the comments, it's how pernicious covert contracts are. Here, you've got a dude who's been committed and progressing awhile only to catch what is really pretty typical (though perhaps on the higher end of intensity) frame testing and is significantly rattled by it because of his belief that he has "earned" his wife's "submission" through "self improvement." We saw the same thing last week with u/ragnar_daneskjold. And I sur…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/11/21 02:55 AM
1

You're on the right track, but you did explain yourself, basically saying that you're being arbitrary as a move in a power game. The dominant frame is not "I'm arbitrary" but rather "I don't play power games." In these situations I have literally STFU and given a "you know why" look or pressure flip ("Is it that you can't or that you don't want to?').
/r/MarriedRedPill09/11/21 11:30 PM
2

I would Rule 9 you if I could. You wrote a section called "Frame" which is nothing more than you responding to her hamster.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/11/21 09:00 PM
1

“I have no reason, I just won’t do it”. My 5-year-old son does this. He doesn't get the respect he thinks he deserves either.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/11/21 08:57 PM
2

What the fuck do you want? Why are you here, other than for validation?
/r/MarriedRedPill09/11/21 08:54 PM
2

Your insights in your relationship section and the negative mindset you've identified is key. In order to model positivity to your household, you have to exude it. If you model negativity, well ....
/r/MarriedRedPill09/11/21 08:45 PM
1

Lot of reading, listening, and writing here. Is there much existing, observing, and appreciating in your life?
/r/MarriedRedPill09/11/21 08:36 PM
2

OYS++ I am done with 'ego'. It's a useless concept. For the last several months I have been hunting it, tracking it, killing it, fleeing it, poisoning it. It always returns. It's like Jason Voorhees. I can watch it die, feel the relief, and find myself soon in it's clutches again. No more. It has taken too much of my time and effort, too much of my life. It is what it is. If it arises again, so be it. I'd rather focus my attention on the universe of which I am a part rather than the tiny speck m…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/11/21 02:17 AM
14

Doesn't matter. Got laid. Go do stuff that matters.
/r/askMRP04/11/21 08:04 PM
1

Her objecting to your desire for a divorce is per se an irreconcilable difference in most no-fault states, and thus a basis for you obtaining the divorce decree. Not tryin to push you in one direction in particular. But this fence-sitting can't be good for anyone. You need her agreement for an uncontested divorce, but why limit yourself to uncontested divorce when you have other options? That you're unwilling to consider a contested divorce has me wondering whether you really want it. So, back t…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/11/21 02:19 PM
1

Unless she's altogether stopped trying, she will always tend to be a polarized reflection of you. Your being unattractively effeminately distant will tend to draw out of her an unnactractive masculine distance. Being masculinely present will tend to ... etc. Distance may be emotional or physical. You can do things to rile the hamster while you're physically away that will keep you emotionally present. And you can also form an emotional block even though physically present. All are tools in the t…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/11/21 11:21 PM
2

Other than validation, what are you wanting here?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/11/21 10:50 PM
1

TRT? Gear?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/11/21 10:42 PM
1

You're 49 and you put on 25# of muscle in 8 months?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/11/21 06:43 PM
2

🍿
/r/MarriedRedPill03/11/21 06:38 PM
3

Any leader who needs followers to lead is not a genuine leader and is not attractive.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/11/21 06:35 PM
1

OP's cares and wants are the only things that matter about the divorce, but it's not clear if he cares about them.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/11/21 12:18 PM
5

Nice job on spicing things up. Don't worry at all about the weirdness of how it feels when you've done one of these grand setups/approaches. Just keep going. Laugh at it openly if you want. You can be dominant and self-anmused. Good stuff.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/11/21 09:44 AM
1

Such a great fucking post.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/11/21 03:31 AM
3

Leadership cant occur where she would not follow. This is the exact thought by which you prevent yourself from leading. You simply don't understand what leading is.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/21 09:05 PM
2

Nice job on the self-awareness about validation-seeking. Props also for using porn for your own ends. work-discipline has been shit But fix this shit. You're clearly procrastinating with sexcapades. You know that's not sustainable.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/21 08:02 PM
3

You're overthinking dude, and you're gaming to have sex. Just game everyday. Any sex is a bonus; it's never expected. Have fun with the game itself. It's just the adult form of hide and seek.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/21 06:42 PM
3

I go to the other room and read Boring. Make better plans. I will continue this course of action until she invests. Fuck you. Right in her fucking frame. No leadership. (BTW, she is investing, dipshit.)
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/21 06:37 PM
1

I did too ... until I got to the other extreme of the pendulum.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/21 06:33 PM
1

As far as energy scarcity goes, I think PoN would argue that there is no energy scarcity if you're present. Scarcity means having less than what you need. Need is a desire to attain something in the future. And worrying about the future doesn't happen if you're in the present. Fair, I suppose. Except I like desire and action and dislike when my present self lacks energy to pursue it.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/21 05:38 PM
3

As I’m in a temporary holding pattern at this stage in the divorce, not thinking about it is probably for the best. I’m refocusing on controlling what is in my control. Why is the divorce not in your control? Do you want it or don't you?
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/21 05:34 PM
3

why would anyone not think that about themselves Exactly. Shit test passed.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/21 05:32 PM
2

Untethered Soul and PoN both purport to provide a means of getting past energy scarcity, but I've yet to experience it. Sounds like you're not experiencing it either. They have both helped me identify and address my ego. But I've not gotten this additional step/level/phase/whatever they describe.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/21 04:52 PM
2

Nice work on the social and leading there. Good fundamental blocking and tackling.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/21 04:51 PM
2

Your ego is keeping you from hitting bottom, which means you'll have further to fall.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/21 04:48 PM
5

So you think you're attractive enough to post muscle pics, but wifey won't let you in her pooper? Enormous covert contract there, brother. Be your own prize. Don't ever snoop again. It's a beta binge. The past neither exists nor matters.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/21 04:39 PM
22

MRP is hard-mode, dude. Biologically, you're wired to want variety. She's wired for hypergamy. RP addresses that wiring. But marriage conflicts with it. Hence, MRP's difference from RP. As for my own "tricks": - Rule Zero - My life is mine. The only criterion is doing it how I want to, regardless of what color "pilled" it is. - Asking myself "Do I like my wife?" - meaning "Do I choose this again today?" - Reminding myself that sex - fun as it is - is just sex. Life is bigger. - Embracing the cha…
/r/askMRP01/11/21 09:04 PM
-3

Pain is the experience of weakness becoming strength.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/10/21 03:18 AM
5

Dumb that your plan is to reduce sex. Increasing emotion in sex itself can be helped with simply vocalizing what you enjoy in the sex about her. Praise her during sex. That's "emotional connection" in her parlance. But also praise her about sex when not having sex. I was hesitant for awhile to do that for fear that it would "look like" I have oneitis. But that just meant I was worried about the power game and thus not abundant. What matters is whether you actually have abundance. If you don't, y…
/r/askMRP27/10/21 09:11 PM
2

Muscles don't make you valuable. Hotness of wife doesn't make you valuable. You make yourself valuable by setting out to do things you want to do and doing them. You are your only you. No one else will be you for you. If you can't see the value in that, no one can.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/21 06:39 PM
2

Your shit's not adding up. We're the same height. You weigh 3lbs more than I. You have 3% less BF, and your squat worksets are 100# less than mine. Mentally, you're tired, lazy, and depressed. You stay up until 2a, but claim to have no time read. Relationship-wise, you're having fun with the energy of a "teenager". WTF?
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/21 06:13 PM
2

I can vouch for the 80%. Also still working on the 95%.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/21 04:32 PM
3

She's begging for you to lead in the bedroom dude. You seem to want that too. Don't be a pussy. Step up!
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/21 04:02 PM
3

💯 Saying to your wife that you "DNGAF about X" is like her saying "I don't want to try anal." That will become contested territory.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/21 02:25 PM
3

I didn't start trusting myself until I had all of my MAP in green. Took me several months. For that time, I didn't care about anything that was not on that MAP. My marriage was not on the MAP.
/r/askMRP26/10/21 01:20 PM
1

You seem like you don't trust yourself to make these decisions. Ultimatums and big decisions are bad plays in such a state. Do you have a MAP? Are you working it?
/r/askMRP26/10/21 01:00 PM
1

Good points. Definitely expected 1), but giving the gift anyway. I assumed 2) would be obvious to everyone, but see that's a bad assumption. I may edit when I have more time to make that connection explicitly.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/21 12:56 PM
1

but that requires that there's some praise worthy behavior present Wrong. You lead by modeling the behavior you expect/desire. It doesn't require anything of anyone.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/21 12:17 PM
1

Nice self-centered experiment. Good initiative for thinking it up and discipline executing it and following through with conclusions you can calibrate with. This is how you change the course of your life.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/21 10:53 AM
2

You aren't leading anywhere positive. But she's still following - hence, the negativity. Do you see the opportunity?
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/21 10:49 AM
1

You have to drag them kicking and screaming to happiness sometimes, dude. Just part of it.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/21 10:41 AM
0

Seriously, though, why are you afraid of divorce now? Why are you not ready? What's that fear all about?
/r/askMRP26/10/21 10:19 AM
9

Why are you afraid of divorce now? You keep saying you're not ready. What's "ready" mean? Why not go ahead and consult with a lawyer and get a plan together, then try to live as a sane man in his own frame (not caring if wife ignores you or if she ravishes you - just taking what comes calmly) for - say - 3 months? See what happens. I wonder what your world looks like then.
/r/askMRP26/10/21 03:53 AM
1

No effort. Fuck off.
/r/askMRP25/10/21 04:00 PM
1

Stats? Reading?
/r/askMRP25/10/21 02:46 PM
1

Rule 9. You're not in your own frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/21 02:39 PM
2

https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/4z84w5/posting_quality_guide_for_rmarriedredpill/
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/21 01:26 PM
5

He already said it: a vision for your future
/r/MarriedRedPill24/10/21 01:45 PM
2

That you're hamstering over 1RM tells me you should just post your worksets. Otherwise, ego will have you trying to lift to impress in your OYSes, or using a dumb e1RM. Lift to improve your body and ego.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/21 08:13 PM
3

But the cruise-control came from the fact that I had a plate that I developed feelings for. You've been operating from a type of abundance which is now gone because you have experienced loss. But because the abundance was dependent on "having," it was really a masked scarcity. You are fortunate that this has been revealed to you. Now, how do you build the type of abundance that is not dependent on "having"?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/10/21 09:03 PM
2

what goals? 'Nuff said.
/r/askMRP22/10/21 08:59 PM
3

Then you don't want a woman, dipshit. Hypergamy doesn't fucking care.
/r/askMRP21/10/21 09:31 PM
2

It was a shitty comfort test (protesting your behavior while expressing discomfort). sprinkling more alpha You can always ignore, or provide comfort with mere presence and without words. You don't have to kick all the way over to AM, which most dudes (including me) usually fuck-up.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/10/21 09:12 PM
1

There's that shitty mind again. A happy mind thinks "Let's give it a shot. What do I have to lose? Might be fun!" You want to be a man? Enjoy challenge, dude.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/10/21 07:16 PM
1

Ok so I've been doing my thing, while watching her play her cards. I've been really focusing on stfu and having success. I am especially focusing on stfu when I feel a weakened frame state. You're wasting your STFU by putting yourself in her frame (i.e., "watching her play her cards"). Just accept she's a hypergamous woman. It's just your turn. End of story. I'm working hard on the mental game You are playing a stupid game and will continue to win stupid prizes. You say you're ignoring her "leav…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/10/21 07:05 PM
16

Your biggest problem with your LTR at your age is that you have one at all.
/r/askMRP21/10/21 06:02 AM
3

I feel weak and pathetic. I feel like I have nothing going for my life even though that's not true. I am hanging out with friends on the weekends, I have a great job, I work out every day, I am training for a marathon, have goals in my career, yet for some reason I still feel like I'm not doing enough or I'm good enough. I get this same disconnect every fall and spring. Like you, I've realized that I am not my feelings and if I keep owning my shit, my feelings come back around eventually. Keep t…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/10/21 05:58 AM
1

And she still owns you! 😁
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 11:59 PM
1

+1
/r/askMRP20/10/21 11:49 PM
1

That Rollins link is dope
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 10:01 PM
18

supposed to be a team I can literally hear the whining. A leader leads, with or without followers.
/r/askMRP20/10/21 09:02 PM
1

no go still Only takes once.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 04:31 PM
3

Haha. I remember writing that and feeling feisty that day. As per 99% of what I say here, it was projection.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 04:30 PM
1

For me, raises.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 12:04 PM
2

I also have some gnawing guilt thoughts about leaving my partner, after using my wife because she made me feel safe and I no longer need her to feel that way. I can’t do anything at this point though because my problem is going to follow me wherever I go because it is me. So you're blaming yourself for trapping yourself with your wife, who you accordingly resent. All that shit - blame, feeling of trapped, and resentment - you will have to work out if you ever wish to be congruent and attractive.…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 08:02 AM
3

Rage = desire to control = ego. Ironically, it makes you lose control of the only thing that you can control. What are you doing about ego?
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 07:48 AM
2

COVID booster = facial, right?
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 03:02 AM
2

pre-emptive strike Avoid the covert counteract and resentment. Reset every evening and initiate/game/kino without expecting success. Live, Die, Repeat.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 01:54 AM
2

Yep, MRP didn't do shit for you. You did it all for yourself, the good and the bad. Do more of the good.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 01:49 AM
1

What are you doing about your anger?
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 01:44 AM
1

drop in libido Are you doing conditioning? Mine rises and falls with that. Who'd've guessed?
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 01:40 AM
2

Books on discipline: Atomic Habits
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 01:38 AM
1

Kill two birds (lack of social & lack of fitness) with one stone (more time at gym / group sports).
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 01:35 AM
3

Help me out here, MRP vets, if a woman is engaged in a one-on-one conversation with you and smiles maintains eye contact? If you’re in a group of 4-5 people at an open bar and she asks just you want you want to drink? I’m fairly certain I know the answer to this, but I am so vastly inexperienced. Comfort tests have been spinning up since I went out… and I got to hear, “Who is this new social you?” which I found amusing. I think you were starting to ask a question but didn't get around to finishi…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 01:32 AM
1

Try to look at the opportunities of your situation, rather than the drawbacks. You are in a new place and don't really have a social life. That means you have plenty of time for fitness. And your new acquaintances will know the fitter you. Reframe your perspective. Also, I can see you have a massive covert contract going with this relocation that you think you "did for the kids." Guess what? You've been awarded no points and may God have mercy on your soul.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 01:29 AM
1

It's okay if you like that she likes your cuddles, dude. Just don't get covert contracts and ego going over it.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 01:24 AM
1

Happy birthday
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 01:21 AM
2

I burned the username and left Reddit when I felt that I had ended up making an ego investment in MRP, and it became a crutch - exactly what Lucky's recent post was about. Came back when I realized I was leaving so much on the table by not engaging from my own frame. Glad I didn't delete that name and still have the record.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/21 11:52 PM
1

A stronger guy decides it doesn't matter and does what he wants without confronting.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/21 11:43 PM
1

https://www.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/oq754u/-/h6a9ieb
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/21 10:28 PM
9

I take no shame in selecting from men here (and elsewhere) behavior and thinking to experiment with as a model. After all, that is how almost all wisdom and techniques are learned. But probably the most profound lesson I've thusfar learned on my own journey is how limiting any ego investment can be. And I have had to step away from MRP several times for precisely that reason. May have to again. When an ego investment starts to get too much traction, I try to remember I am more than I will ever b…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/21 02:58 AM
1

blockages You mean the dump? ;-)
/r/askMRP18/10/21 08:20 PM
16

Doing everything yourself is a waste of time. Caring too much about everything is a waste of fucks. Value your time and attention, and you'll appreciate the contributions of others that enable you to focus on what really matters. When people feel appreciated, they are more apt to enter your frame and open to direction. Establish that rapport and lead rather than just taking over an assignment. It takes time and attention, so do it only for people and assignments that matter. AA is best left for …
/r/askMRP18/10/21 09:55 AM
1

Rule zero, dude. It's all just tools. You use them to build what you want.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/10/21 12:41 AM
2

Lone-wolfish because he only cares about his "intent" and doesn't give the single fuck necessary for increasing his power and influence by calibrating what he expresses. He's just saying what he feels without further calibrating to build influence and rapport. It's a mild venting. The vets' points about never saying "sorry" are because that word literally and sublimally simultaneously comunicates 1) that your inner state is perturbed and perturbable (broadcasting an unnactractive weakness of fra…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/21 05:46 PM
1

W&S seemed on the lone-wolf-end of things here. Wonder if that was how he related to others. He seemed all push game, with very little deliberate pull game, pulling instead solely with his value. He did have interesting vulnerabilities tho.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/21 02:49 PM
1

😉
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/21 03:14 AM
2

What's worse is that I would go so far as to ban you if I could. You're that lazy.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/21 02:04 AM
3

post my question elsewhere I agree. You're lazy. You should fuck off.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/21 02:01 AM
5

We calibrate our advice to where guys are. Your response to my question about stats and readings shows you know next to nothing about what we're doing here. If you want us to invest, you need to invest first.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/21 01:56 AM
3

It's not that I can't answer, it's that you haven't done enough work to understand.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/21 01:51 AM
1

https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/acvzgx/steels_guide_to_married_red_pill/
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/21 01:40 AM
2

Stats? Reading done?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/21 01:38 AM
2

If I was to say your comment is a lone-wolfish suggestion, would you understand what I mean?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/21 12:40 AM
1

Not that anyone cares, but I'm for the Rule 9 & 10 bans. People are here because they recognize the value. The ban is slap on the wrist, but enough to matter to people who value being here. Helps move from chaff to wheat. And people certainly do "write in MRP's frame," but there's nothing wrong with people LARPing and following a model for while to get where they're wanting to go. All part of experimentation. (Obvi, some dudes just keep spinning their wheels endlessly - but those guys are easy t…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/10/21 08:19 PM
2

Yeah. You're just cold as a stone. It's not fun.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/10/21 06:45 PM
1

This is a good point. I mentioned you only say you're sorry when it doesn't matter (meaning you're not sorry). Your point reminds me that this is sloppy incongruity that can be refined with your advice. On the flipside, if you are contrite, it's perfectly congruent to express that, if doing so is useful. Thanks
/r/MarriedRedPill15/10/21 06:08 PM
1

Hope you profit. This OYS was way better, btw. don't lift atm But this seriously needs to be fixed. You're leaving too much on the table without lifting.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/10/21 06:44 PM
1

Sounds like you got it. A man with options is never disappointed.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/10/21 06:08 PM
1

💯 By freak out I meant rage. (It's the only freak out I've experienced.) OP, you're definitely going feel pretty intense anger at some point. Just remember to never act on it impulsively. Try to channel it into something self-loving (lifting, reading, hobbies alone). Work on self-control and self-love while you work a successful strategy for your relationship, or leaving it. Don't ever give anyone an ability to impugne or disregard you as just a bitter angry etc.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/10/21 03:05 PM
3

And don't freak too much when you do. You have a look long future ahead of you and time is on your side.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/10/21 01:50 PM
1

Of course, if you are attractive and not unattractive. Plenty of celibate MGTOW dudes out there going for what they want while generating no tingles. You deliberately making the pussy wet and inducing chase is you doing what you want (unless you're a f@990t), and it's often done by doing things she'll say she doesn't want, but really does. In other words what she want is irrelevant, but sometimes is what you want. Don't just do the opposite of what she wants. And don't refrain from doing somethi…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/10/21 01:02 PM
2

Just read the book. He explains it better than I can and what he explains tracks what I've experienced.
/r/askMRP13/10/21 07:32 PM
5

Frame is not a "feeling". It's not the result of 3 coffees and a dump. You're having wild mood swings as you unplug. Frame is willing a perspective and affect into being, regardless of the "feelings" your mind or body present to you. The "stronger" your frame, the less you will feel such swings, and the less people will be able to detect such swings. Best thing I've read on developing frame is Untethered Soul.
/r/askMRP13/10/21 07:19 PM
1

Exactly. Yet these dumbfucks still can't seem to find it.
/r/askMRP13/10/21 05:35 PM
2

I'll butt-smack any dude who finds himself out of a maze, even one of his own making. There's a beauty to it that I appreciate. It's why the prodigal son's dad threw a homecoming party. Good stuff.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/10/21 05:33 PM
2

Nice. The saying what you want is a weird habit to learn. Like most things, it gets easier with use. Tingles are often about how you say things. So, when you get comfortable saying what you want, you can play with making tingles by the way you say it. Or maybe you make tingles without words. Good stuff here.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/10/21 05:24 PM
1

Power of Now and Untethered Soul
/r/MarriedRedPill13/10/21 05:19 PM
1

Narcissism is a failure to distinguish the self from not self. Ego is the protection of an image or model of the self. Either can be useful or destructive in varying degrees or contexts.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/10/21 04:43 AM
2

It's just a reality check. Doesn't matter of she's actually interested or is just doing her own dread game. Your work rises above all that shit.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/10/21 04:05 AM
3

Dude's clearly raging. Yet the 5 bits of wisdom are true. Bravo, out-f@990ter of f@990ts!
/r/MarriedRedPill13/10/21 03:03 AM
1

OYS++ Took stock today about the difference a year makes. I remember last year at this time swinging between super horny and super angry. Whatever my mood was, it was very intense. The fire burned within. Now, it's anything but. I would describe it as apathetic, but I'm too productive for that to be quite right. I still own my shit, but I just don't care very much about my shit. Or relationships. They are all replaceable to me. I can be content with so very little. Where there once was fire is n…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/10/21 01:57 AM
5

You get me a KitchenAid mixer and maybe I'll give you a blowjob. "Well, if you really want me to treat you like my whore ...." she gets nothing out of it ... and doesn't like giving them. "Bullshit. You love my cock in your mouth. Your pussy's wet right now just thinking about it. Rule for retards: if she mentions or alludes to sex in a good mood, the pussy's wet. A man who fucks should be able to take it from there.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/10/21 12:13 AM
3

If only there was a guide to finding the sidebar.
/r/askMRP12/10/21 11:58 PM
1

Again ....WTF are you doing about ego?
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 11:56 PM
1

who am I You are the one who experiences what you experience. There. Solved that for you. Back to action. No more need to navel-gaze.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 11:54 PM
1

Wife invited old coworker to watch your daughter play youth sports? And he showed? You're right not to give a fuck ultimately, but it's fishy.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 11:52 PM
1

https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/acvzgx/steels_guide_to_married_red_pill/
/r/askMRP12/10/21 09:48 PM
5

Glad you got some validation sex. Maybe you've "turned the corner." But probably not. That you're framing this as a pivotal event is telling. You have validation and covert contracts wrapped up in there. You've assumed the fuck-machine frame. Cool. It too will be tested. She may try to outfuck you and stop. She may try to withhold it etc. Point is, you're a fool if you expect her to completely drop her power game while you're continuing to play it. What's the next level, then?
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 02:58 PM
3

It just doesn't fucking matter if she cheated. You'll understand this when you unfuck yourself to the point of seeing that you'd cheat on your shitty self too. She's clearly following your lead and upping the ante on the stupid fucking text/chat scoreboard bullshit dynamic you have brought to your relationship. Why you'd do that with a wife you like is beyond me. This reads like she still wants to follow you, but you keep leading to shitty dynamics, which means she wants to follow you to killing…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 02:46 PM
2

I am definitely not the prize. Self-fulfilling prophecy.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 02:36 PM
4

Holy shit. Your username sure as fuck checks out. Will be interested to watch this shit show.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 02:33 PM
1

Yet, when she didn’t answer a text and do what I asked her I started to panic and obsess about her. Panic that I’d lost what I’d just gained. I vomited words and who knows what will happen. ... This stuff is powerful and can get you what you want. https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/pkny44/its_all_your_fault_wins_included/
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 02:28 PM
2

gonna research this subject more What are you doing for this research? If your research doesn't involve experimentation, it's just mental masturbation.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 02:23 PM
5

call out Horns name as I climaxed (Throws up in his mouth a little.)
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 02:20 PM
2

blinking 2-3 times for now These hacks are cringe AF, but they do seem to work to get some momentum going. There's been some physiological empirically verified evidence that focused breathing can help get your hormones etc. back under control too. Ultimately, just observing your mind do these things is all you need. Just training your awareness on being aware. Very simple. Very easy to do. Hard to start doing in the moment.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 02:18 PM
3

I like the post, but the title betrays it. You're as good as you trust, value, and love yourself to be. You will make "bad" decisions. You will grow with consistent care and love of yourself, even especially when you are recovering from a bad decision. You don't have to prove how "good" you are with every decision you make, which was how I read the title. Thanks for the post and nice job pulling your ass up by your belt loops.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/21 02:11 PM
1

pisses me off Try to see if you can convert the energy of anger into desired results and actions. If not, then you have to ask whether it's at all useful. If not, then I hope you know what your priority is.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/10/21 03:50 PM
18

It means she's trying to branch-swing to your dad.
/r/askMRP09/10/21 04:54 AM
3

https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/4z84w5/posting_quality_guide_for_rmarriedredpill/
/r/MarriedRedPill07/10/21 09:33 PM
1

Be okay with yourself, even if you go off-map. You are more important than your map. And your map only works because you do. You are the man who made you happen.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/10/21 06:39 PM
1

that happens along the way, down the road. You don't have to understand now how it is all going to work out in the future. You'll find out. You mean when the magic MRP fairy comes and leaves it under his fucking pillow? Bullshit. It doesn't just "happen." True, you don't have to have the entire vision now. But it's not something that you just "find out". And it takes trial and error, not just "wait and see." Being your future self is something you craft, something you - as the agent in your life…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/10/21 10:19 PM
1

makes things worse Because you lose frame. Because you're mentally weak. Because oneitis. And now you're bickering about it like a petulant child. This is all ego investment, dude. Better get to work on it.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/10/21 09:49 PM
1

Wait. ... Your oneitis is so bad that you can't even visualize (as in merely imagine) your wife cucking you and you booting her without losing frame? That's fucked up, dude. You're a lost fucking cause if you can't muster that modicum of mental fortitude.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/10/21 09:37 PM
2

Get serious about your oneitis. You're not a fatass. Maybe you could pull another girl. The world is loaded with them. Make yourself attractive to yourself. Seriously visualize yourself finding your wife with another dude and giving no fucks other than to boot her from your finances. Seriously visualize how fun it would be to go on the prowl again. Realize your wife is not yours. It's just your turn. Flipside to that is you're not hers. She just has (maybe) a right of first refusal on whether sh…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/10/21 08:57 PM
2

You have to connect the dots, man. Only you know who you are now, and only you can see this future you. What are the waypoints on your journey to him? What steps do you need to take to get there? Make a plan with goals and priorities. Books, MRP and internet strangers can't give you that detail.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/10/21 07:46 PM
1

You probably can't be that guy yet. But you can care and feed for him to grow into what he will be.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/10/21 07:35 PM
1

as long as I'm running my map Fuck this. It's on you, the map is just a reflection of you.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/10/21 06:23 PM
3

Go deeper. Really get to know this man you want to be and love him. Give him today what he will need done to be who he is, just as you would your own child.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/10/21 06:19 PM
6

Doing things is better than not doing things, and doing women is best.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/10/21 12:47 AM
2

But you do know. Examine him. Does he need anything or anybody? Is he not absolutely content with his own company? What if the only difference between him and you is that he loves himself more than you do yourself?
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 09:05 PM
2

Right. Now, how did that guy become who he is?
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 08:58 PM
5

Where to? Island. Jungle. Beach. Diving. Fucking. weird to hear that Thought so too. It's my shit, though. I'm really digging into ego and I'm encountering old fears that I thought I had passed.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 08:55 PM
2

Does the guy you want to be put his foot down about his need for "affection" being a boundary? The whole thing is cringe, man. Affection is great. Needing affection is needy. Needy is unattractive. A feminine woman doesn't have affection for a needy man.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 08:45 PM
3

Down 53 pounds since March. Nice. You're about 1/3rd of the way there. Looks to me like this should be your top priority.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 08:38 PM
1

Now that I am stripping down my ego layer by layer my shitty core is being exposed more every week. Just keep going with the honesty. Don't self-flagellate. Just feel all this shit as it runs through you. Reset everyday. Aim for fun days, not days with sex in them. Enjoy the parts of your wife that annoy you. Read that part of TWOTSM again. Stop wanting her to stop being feminine.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 08:36 PM
2

I had been resenting all of these tests, thinking why are they testing me, making my life more complicated, and making me navigate this unpleasant situation. Now I’ve been seeing these as an opportunity for me to gain more This is the shit! When you meet challenge as being good for you, life suddenly becomes abundant with things that are good for you. Liberating, isn't it?
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 07:50 PM
1

she knows about that you Well put. That was definitely part of the chorus in my head. Part of the panic was that the typical reframing of "just her shit, don't care" wasn't "working". It was all very first-months level shit and thinking. Very weird. Not at all even close to what my thinking has been for months. And then it was gone. Not with a hack, but just by watching it and going to sleep. So weird.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 06:22 PM
2

Read, dude. Go read.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 05:27 PM
2

Wow. First actual FMOFY in a long while. Will be interested to see how you play it. And yes, this is a Rule 9 disaster. She's running your whole fucking show.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 05:25 PM
1

Progress without question. I still OYSed, just not here. Revamped MAP to try and focus less on putting out fires and more on making my efforts match priorities. I haven't gotten "complacent" in a while. Have I procrastinated and postponed shit? Sure, but not with the things that really matter. I think the protection issue I'm worried about is related to what I commented-on with DirtyNuke and Blarg above. I've had a conflict about my growth-centered frame and all my ego work. The "new me" with al…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 05:04 PM
2

Yes. You really are that far ahead of many of us. What got me is all the women in it who admit to being unattracted to their husbands, glad to get sex elsewhere, and who held their husbands in contempt for not dominating them. I was so weak that I essentially needed the validation of strange women's diaries to imagine that was even possible. It might as well have been written by Rollo (who mentioned it in one of his posts, btw).
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 04:52 PM
3

Did you just call me a sniffling rat? ;-)
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 04:32 PM
2

My Secret Garden
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 03:17 PM
3

she feels like I want her to be something she’s not You're showing a new frame to her. She's testing it. (As expected.) So, it's a LARP and she called it. No big deal. Happens all the time. Question for you is whether this frame is really what you want. If it is, strap in and get ready for the tests. I personally can't tell if you really want this frame. Her test was pretty light and you're first inclination is to "step back". You either don't really want it or you're a pussy. Or both. But if yo…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 03:15 PM
1

You come off as butt-hurt at each rejection, and you change the subject when she obliquely mentions how you rip her shit up. Have you considered that these are the mouth noises of a woman who likes the chase and rough-housing?
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 03:11 PM
1

Sorry to hijack, but had to jump in. (Also, good to see you Blarg.) I can see "Nothing is wrong. Nothing is right." from where I currently am, but I have not entered into it. I'm scared of it. Acquiring a frame centered on growth has "gotten me to where I am" and now I realize that this is an ego investment too that the next whatever will require I relinquish. And I'm afraid of what I'll become without it.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 03:08 PM
6

OYS n+1 Lifting has been steady work and progress on 5/3/1. Still having to calibrate with shoulder, forearm, etc. But, as I've said before, it's all just part of building a base that I just don't have yet. Frame and mentality has been steady. Work is not effortless, but I've achieved a level of mastery and NGAF about it that I pretty readily knock-out or delegate whatever the fuck needs to be done, even though we're having a crazy uptick in volume. Fun has been high. Had the best trip of my lif…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 02:50 PM
2

So, you're one of the casualties of playing with dynamite. You assumed the risk. What the fuck are you going to do to calibrate?
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 02:32 PM
9

Fuck, dude. Your ego is on overdrive. This whole thing is an enormous ego-protection DEER. You patronize the vets. You apologize in advance for not owning your shit in the future. You rationalize not lifting. You lower your own standards to justify your current self, and then you still shit on your current self, only then to tell us all about your "plans" so as to get some feeling that those will validate you. "I suck but have plans at not sucking." You need to lift. Not to be "functional" or "a…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 02:28 PM
7

Open her(book) Beware, Dancing Monkey. I too read that book and thought it'd be nice to become 007 or WTF-ever was in those chapters. But the whole fucking thing is in a woman's frame. It's her writing about guys she especially liked fucking or getting comfort from and advising the rest of men to be more like that. It's a siren call. She really has no clue what it is to be a man, let alone become one. Just fucking be you and do the hard work it takes to find out WTF that is and manifesting it.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 02:07 PM
2

That tension would have crumbled the old me. This is key. When you can be the master of tension, you can pull all the strings.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 02:03 PM
3

It's their version of push/pull/chase. If you can bounce off a soft no and come back unphased, it gets the pussy wetter. When you see it as a game and know there's a fucking at some point, you just don't care about/see LMR etc. It's all part of the game and dance. From her perspective it looks like you might not really close, which they find sexy. From your perspective and frame it's just "okay, little puppy, we'll play your little game for a bit." All that said, it's good to do a "I mean busine…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 01:57 PM
2

NMMNG & Untethered Soul
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/21 01:35 AM
1

If you want counseling for yourself, regardless of whether you have any relationship with her or any other woman, by all means. But it sounds like you want to drag her into counseling to fix her. I don't know anyone who did that successfully. And it sounds like a nasty covert contract. Getting your shit together and unfucking yourself usually does the trick, and if it doesn't, you just find a different woman for whom "it works." Or don't. Just do what you want.
/r/askMRP04/10/21 07:04 PM
1

Take your own advice, "BigBoi."
/r/MarriedRedPill04/10/21 07:00 PM
2

Dogma around here is that while individual persons may benefit from therapy or counseling, "relationships" typically don't. A man who has his shit together (with or without his own therapy counseling) should be able to attract a woman with her shit together (with or without counseling) into a mutually satisfying relationship that the woman maintains while following the man's priorities. "Relationship counseling" tends to fail because it focuses on "communication" which is usually just a trigger …
/r/askMRP04/10/21 06:57 PM
1

You would have been able to see that if your head wasn't so far up your ass. It's all your fault. 😘
/r/MarriedRedPill04/10/21 06:15 PM
1

You can game hard and constantly. If you truly DNGAF, and you are attractive, "it works." Else, you're needy. Most dudes don't have enough DNGAF to go on a blitz like you did without coming off needy.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/10/21 06:00 PM
1

If you think any of this contradicts the post, you missed the point of the post.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/10/21 01:49 PM
1

Rule 9 is tough. I've studied archwinger and jacktenharts posts and reading old messages from the board, many of them outline the female actions in detail to provide context and help identify how we should handle them. You fucking idiot. Read your OYS again. By "handle" you mean "react" - you're completely in her frame. That's Rule 9, not the mere details. (Ironically, she's following your lead even when you're not leading. (That's actually a good sign there might be a good wife in there somewhe…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/10/21 10:42 PM
4

held hostage All your cages are locked from the inside.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/10/21 02:39 PM
1

I'm a man who fucks. I already told you how I'd zag. I have no clue how you should have.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/10/21 04:55 AM
3

but I just skimmed through your spreadsheet, saddled up and started blasting I could tell. Hence my call-out. So, just calibrate a bit and keep upping the ante. She'll bring energy too.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/10/21 11:44 PM
1

I don't disagree
/r/MarriedRedPill01/10/21 10:58 PM
1

I didn't STFU, didn't pass go, didn't collect $200. I did a weak attempt at fogging, negative assertion and inquiry. Really I should have just STFU for most and it would have blown over quickly. It is an improvement over my past self, but this week I am as out of form here as I was at the gym. Nice self-evaluation. Cool thing is you'll have plenty of opportunities for practice, so just leave failures in the past - which is precisely that which no longer exists.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/10/21 10:35 PM
1

Later I got hassled again about something mundane, I don't recall. I ignored it. 4pm she comes out all dolled up and says let's go. I wasn't done washing my truck, told her no. 6pm. Big attitude. 530pm comes around, she's in a foul mood. I decided I'm not rewarding this shitty behaviour, and say her attitude isn't working for me right now, we'll try another time. I'm taking kids to the beach, you're welcome to join. Wife's bending over in front of me all pissed off, I'm about to put my belt on. …
/r/MarriedRedPill01/10/21 10:31 PM
1

read a few posts from guys who passed the anger phase and look back and wish they had the motivation and clarity anger can provide. So I get angry, for unreasonable and reasonable reasons. I will channel this into gains in my mental fortitude, physical fitness and my mission. I need to make sure I keep the anger internal and not externalize to wife or other factors. My wife is my reflection so I should only be angry with myself. There's wisdom here. But the reason dudes run out of anger is that …
/r/MarriedRedPill01/10/21 10:23 PM
1

Rule 9 "Do you think other wives would put up with this?" "Don't know, don't care. But willing to find out." There's no logic in the argument Shocking. (Hint: It's her feelz, dude.) sleeping in another bedroom What in the actual fuck is this? I mean what man who fucks doesn't sleep (NAKED!) in his own fucking bedroom. That place should be your domain. You've given it up. Why? Nevermind. Your reason sucks. woman who engages in poor sex (at best) You suck at sex. Probably boring. Or angry. Lead he…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/10/21 10:18 PM
1

What is it that you "want from your marriage" vs. what you "want from your partner"? Why is your future seemingly in what these two provide you? Who's taking whom for the ride here?
/r/MarriedRedPill01/10/21 10:02 PM
2

Lol. I'm happy to not be considered for all the no paying jobs out there. Your standards are going to shit if you were at all seriously considering it anyway.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/10/21 08:33 PM
13

Fuck yeah! When someone hands you dynamite, you light the fuse! But notice how often Horns said to "watch", "STFU", or "wait." Remember, the immediate intended effect should be to rile the hamster, which leads to her chasing you, the PRIZE.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/10/21 04:54 PM
2

That's fine. I'll just find another button. #abundance
/r/MarriedRedPill01/10/21 04:29 PM
1

I checked her browser history on Sunday Stop this shit. It's poison. Sucks you into her frame. It doesn't fucking matter what she's thinking about. When you fix you, you'll be able to influence her with attraction, game, etc., which is way more satisfying and is from your frame. Stop trying to cheat. and saw that she had watched porn. Then I got angry because I’m not getting good sex meanwhile she’s watching porn and getting off. What the fuck is wrong with you? Angry at her for wanting to get f…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/10/21 04:13 PM
2

I lifted. I sidebared. I read a zillion MRP posts and comments. I eventually OYSed. Most importantly, I experimented with advice on MRP. 1000 ft. rope. Start tugging. https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/acvzgx/steels_guide_to_married_red_pill/
/r/askMRP01/10/21 03:45 PM
1

Flow state rocks, but my experience with it is always being context-specific (focusing on a task) and object-conscious (I "disappear" as I'm immersed in the task). He's talking about it being context-independent and not object-conscious.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/10/21 01:25 PM
4

I actually went so far to convince myself that my wife had actually cheated (maybe she did?) just to kill my oneitis and internalize "it's just my turn" and outcome independence. Helped me realize that I'd've cheated on me too. So, I let all that shit go and started living for myself, realizing that no one will love me or take care of me better than me. And the more I "need" someone else to, the more I'm neglecting myaelf. After succeeding at that, it was very easy to imagine a good life without…
/r/askMRP01/10/21 12:51 AM
7

And lose my button? Hell no.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/09/21 10:34 PM
5

While I agree with all this, it's no real loss of frame to just go a few times, basically STFU, to check the box and never go back. It's no different than listening to her complain or whine when feels get going. Now, engaging and trying to use it to "fix" the marriage? That's a waste of time at best. I guess I'm saying, if you said you'd go, it's probably Rambo to do a 180 on that because of new-found fake-ass frame. In fact, it'll be a good frame exercise to actually go a few times and hold fra…
/r/askMRP30/09/21 09:07 PM
3

If you can STFU, fog, etc. and hold frame, it's just a matter of how much time you want to waste with it. I entertained it for three sessions, then peace-outed. If you're nailing your shit, and your marriage isn't dead already, no one will care if you bow-out. If they do care, fuck 'em.
/r/askMRP30/09/21 08:13 PM
4

(Pushes button.)
/r/MarriedRedPill30/09/21 07:49 PM
1

Hadn't taken the time to do that, but now I'm curious.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/09/21 07:35 PM
4

(Pushes button.)
/r/MarriedRedPill30/09/21 07:33 PM
5

It's like you have red button with neon flashing around it that says "push me".
/r/MarriedRedPill30/09/21 07:19 PM
1

You do way kinkier shit, huh?
/r/MarriedRedPill30/09/21 07:06 PM
1

It's what I did, and I've not regretted it. "Choose your hard," right?
/r/MarriedRedPill30/09/21 07:03 PM
2

https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/acvzgx/steels_guide_to_married_red_pill/
/r/MarriedRedPill30/09/21 05:30 PM
5

Awesome. I've not yet internalized being sexually creative. Having you and others as a model is extremely helpful when I regress to my current mean. Thanks for this and your efforts.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/09/21 05:12 PM
2

I came here when I started getting duty sex. We fuck now. Duty sex means she isn't being fucked like Chad fucks.
/r/askMRP30/09/21 04:30 PM
2

Shitty sex is not "fucking".
/r/askMRP30/09/21 04:04 PM
1

It's better to be jacked and get the raise. I have been wealthy and fat. I have been poor and fit. Poor and fit was better than wealthy and fat. Wealthy and fit is best.
/r/askMRP30/09/21 02:08 PM
3

signs Not fucking you is the sign.
/r/askMRP30/09/21 01:09 PM
6

No dude. If you were that high value to her, your dick would be her catnip. She would crazy fuck to keep you. The fact that she's not fucking you is the proof that she agreed because she likes keeping her options open. As in, for a branch swing. Fuck, man. Read the fucking books.
/r/askMRP30/09/21 03:19 AM
5

If she believes you're her best option, she won't risk putting the relationship in a situation where she could lose you. Wife straight up told me this is why threeway etc. Is hard no for her
/r/askMRP30/09/21 01:29 AM
2

Take my upvotes, all of them.
/r/askMRP30/09/21 01:09 AM
2

My gigantic ego needs to be kept in check Being shitty to yourself doesn't check ego. That's an egoistic way of handling ego. Loving yourself for what you objectively are is how you get ego to disappear. Congrats on discoverying your ego, btw. I recall last week you weren't seeing it. The "tough judge" advice here is as hyperbolic as the frame testing and AMOGing. We are all trying to eliminate our own shittiness, which is more often than not directed at ourselves. Sure, we need rousing off our …
/r/MarriedRedPill29/09/21 11:55 PM
10

✅ she gets half your money ✅ she gets to fuck whomever she wants ✅ she doesn't have to fuck you ✅ you're "rusty" Played yourself, dude.
/r/askMRP29/09/21 08:00 PM
0

It means she's a boy now.
/r/askMRP29/09/21 07:54 PM
7

Those aren't impressive stats.
/r/askMRP29/09/21 08:15 AM
23

You're in orbit, Capt. Dipshit. Change your course.
/r/askMRP29/09/21 07:09 AM
1

Oh, now you're gonna STFU? After 4 replies? Bravo. Be proud. You have indeed won. Fucking pathetic. Either lean in or get the fuck out of here.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 06:09 PM
0

We're all impressed with the internet bitch, tho. Just keep talking, Mr. STFU.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 06:00 PM
2

Or $1,900 for the double-team.
/r/askMRP28/09/21 05:57 PM
1

I like to explain where people are wrong when they make a mistake Talk to yourself. You made a paper thin commitment and broke it in 4 hours. You're a bitch.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 05:47 PM
3

Also, about as much effort as your input. Nice STFU fail. Can't even control your own fucking mouth. Fuck off.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 05:05 PM
1

FWIW: https://www.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/oq754u/-/h6a9ieb
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 04:44 PM
1

Yes. I think he actually calls it "infinite energy". (Who wouldn't want that?) Still on my first read through.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 04:33 PM
1

Be glad she's a woman or get a boyfriend. Love it.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 04:05 PM
1

Sage advice
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 03:09 PM
1

D/s classifieds are on another thread.
/r/askMRP28/09/21 03:03 PM
2

"Motivated career beta looking to make it an HOF career." Extra points for making your post very on-brand.
/r/askMRP28/09/21 03:01 PM
1

Her pushing back and resisting is all part of the game within the framework I've created. Gives her latitude to be creative about pursuing me. In short, it turns me on a bit. She's being her feminine self, which invites my masculine self. It's merely occasional, so it's not conditioning for a regular dynamic. It's just a bit of variety, particularly when dread is high. Other dudes have full-on crazy shit going on that's all designed by their women to trap them or otherwise get their needs met in…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 02:34 PM
1

Thanks. Should've mentioned you too.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 02:23 PM
2

I'm not 24/7 d/s (yet?), but I snack at their buffet. Here's where I entered: Wiseman's SM101, Master' Control Book, and Easton's New Topping Book. They were recommended as "classics" by an acquaintance. Obviously, u/hornsofapathy is your guru here.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 01:53 PM
1

Same on PON & US. Shows how subtle ego is. Are you able to do the "continuous energy" bit in US? I'm skeptical about it.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 12:48 PM
1

I should not give a fuck about this either. What are you replacing caring about this with?
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 12:25 PM
1

This doesn't sound like crazy level dread. If it's not, then maybe just enjoy the swings. All part of the fun of polarity.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 12:20 PM
5

Last trip I had, I nuked it quickly on return, but just enough to ego break. I then fucked her with all alpha, no comfort. (Literally just silently grabbed her bent her over and ....) Then, let her earn my time and attention from there. The trips really are dread for them. That means the pussy's wet. Depending on how you run your shit, sex can be useful here. Caveat: I don't really care if she's occasionally bitchy anymore. Chalk it up to polarity. So, I don't have the worry about rewarding bad …
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 12:18 PM
0

I miss Rule 9 bans.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 09:37 AM
2

but then when the mood strikes her she tries to reassert some control. When mine does this, the pussy's wet. Sometimes it happens after I've gotten lazy or boring. I like it as a signal to check whether I'm playing at my edge. a smack on the arse works but sometimes not. "Works" sounds short-sighted. I try to frame it as: doesn't matter how/what she dishes out, we both know how it ends - me doing what I want, which is what she really wants. I’m getting stuck in actually defining what I want this…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 09:35 AM
1

https://www.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/oqi6n0/-/h6fj6xn
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 09:00 AM
2

The people who put one foot in front of the other don't sit there and heap shit on their heads. Just get to fucking work.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/21 01:52 AM
2

Gaming while you're too fat to close is maybe a good way to learn how to get over your fear of failure and develop OI. I personally never did it myself. (That is, like you, I didn't game until I thought I was attractive.) But I have seen other dudes say they succeed with it. Either way, don't procrastinate on actually gaming. It's the only way to do that part of the training.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/21 04:23 PM
1

am self diagnosing/rationalizing. Very good you have this awareness. But also be aware of this: feel like I’ve been gaslighted to some extent. Which is you thinking of yourself as an object that other people and forces act upon. Shift your focus to you being the subject - that is an agent who acts out and brings about what he wants. Maybe you have a lot of shit. But so do a lot of people. Find people who have had more shit than you and have nonethess lived as if they have less shit than most peo…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/21 03:14 PM
1

Go fix it.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/21 03:11 PM
2

I do not want to rush into a new relationship and will spin my plates once I get better in shape. You are still gaming and fucking, right? That's got nothing to do with relationship. Where's your abundance? achieving the alpha mindset Read the fucking sidebar. You don't know what the fuck you're doing.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/21 03:01 PM
2

struggling to spin plates in a foreign country. It's all the foreigners' fault. Lockdown fucked me, got fat, decided to grow a beard and shaved my head It's all lockdown's fault. no dread as nowhere to go, just routine complacency. It's all lockdown's fault. pretty sure another dude in the picture Wait? How did he escape the cockblocking disaster of lockdown?! (obviously there was she said she went on a date a week or so after she ended things) saying she didnt like my flaws and therefore wasnt …
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/21 02:56 PM
1

"The whole thing is the ego trying to deeper imbed, and hide, itself." I will be much obliged if you explain how I am doing this. You are complicit with hiding your ego from yourself. The very fact that you fein not knowing how this could happen demonstrates it. Or it demonstrates that you really have no clue what you're talking about when you are talking about ego. (Incidentally, the way you describe ego in your post is much too narrow. Yes, holding on to assumptions is caused by ego, but ego i…
/r/askMRP27/09/21 01:43 PM
3

I am in no search for anything. Read your post title and try to sell us on this bullshit again. Ego.
/r/askMRP27/09/21 01:36 PM
5

Whatever it is you're up to here, you seem unsatisfied with your reception here. The vets see through that to a frame and validation issue. It's all just feedback. Take what profits you.
/r/askMRP27/09/21 12:36 PM
3

Not all mental models are equal. A keystone one is whether you equate the good with the useful. Once you do that, others unlock and present themselves. But it takes action, trial-and-error. Writing and teaching doesn't suffice. What I mean is, I know what you really want. But I can't give it to you. You have to get it yourself. Words don't really do it justice. It's extremely simple. So much so, that you'll laugh when you have it. Someone (was it JackTen? Steel?) said a woman's hamster eats your…
/r/askMRP27/09/21 12:40 AM
2

He's trying to put names on what he's seen, rather than experience what others have named. When he does experience it, he'll lose all motivation to post a treatise like this. All that has been said is enough. In other words, having frame includes the conscious awareness that you have frame. If you're still trying to name it to "know it when it happens," you're tilting at windmills. The problem is not wrong thinking, it's not doing.
/r/askMRP26/09/21 11:25 PM
6

I get his urge to "have it out" with these concepts. It's totally habitual to think that complete and verified understanding must precede the actions which result in mastery, but that habit is what got most of us mindfucked in the first place.
/r/askMRP26/09/21 07:16 PM
4

Try asking internet strangers
/r/askMRP26/09/21 04:41 PM
10

Admittedly broadside: too much thinking here. The whole thing is the ego trying to deeper imbed, and hide, itself. Try Power of Now and Untethered Soul for really seeing ego, and dealing with it. Escaping ego requires presence and conscious action. Large thought structures tend to obstruct.
/r/askMRP26/09/21 03:26 PM
1

kick It's all just feedback, even if it's assholish or painful. Take what profits you.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/09/21 04:13 PM
1

Sending her to therapy for your own fat-and-neediness has probably conditioned her to associate sex with you as time spent dealing with her own defect, rather than freedom and reward. Dumb fucking mistake. Will make your journey more challenging. I'd try to undo that association and create a new dynamic of freedom and ease around sex. When that's somewhat established, increase dominance. Right now, your sex sounds like a frequent and exhausting chore.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/09/21 08:44 AM
3

I'd bet when you're no longer a fat needy fuck, the pussy works just fine without any therapeutic intervention. (Ask me how I know.)
/r/MarriedRedPill23/09/21 08:22 AM
1

Keep leaning out. 25% bf is still quite heavy to expect a wet pussy. Keep up initiations etc., though. But work on OI. Lots of anger here. You have one or more convert contracts around PIV, I bet. Figure them out and kill them. Analyze your ego and anger. Is your ego making you entitled and petulant? Does it add any strategic or tactical value to what you're trying to accomplish? Same question for anger. Is it at all useful to you? Get curious about its source and detached as you feel it. Notice…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/09/21 06:53 AM
1

You're constantly justifying yourself. With many, many words. When I or others are in that mode, it's generally because that voice inside our heads (i.e., ego) is working overtime trying to control our appearance to the world. I see it because I've lived it. Also, you're not doing anything about it and you don't see it. That's what ego does. Blinds you to it's effect, convinces you it's not there. It's deceptive and takes work to master. It might be the mysterious problem you and others referenc…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/09/21 11:42 PM
1

something that I'm not looking at Yep. That's ego.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/09/21 07:52 PM
1

Did you just say I fuck like your wife?😁
/r/MarriedRedPill22/09/21 07:51 PM
1

A ton of the books we discuss are free as audio on YouTube.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/09/21 02:37 PM
1

Yes, I can be quite verbose. What are you doing about your ego?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/09/21 01:24 PM
1

Turns out full audiobook is on YouTube for free: https://youtu.be/oXh-50pdyRk
/r/MarriedRedPill22/09/21 01:10 PM
4

I'm in the monkmode-is-generally-a-bad-idea camp. Full abstinence for a long period of time doesn't give you real practice for developing OI and it's very unattractive. Instead of fucking in her frame, you're not-fucking in her frame. That is, you are telling yourself the fucking will get better by not fucking for a long while. Your wife won't see any leadership in that. She will see you are a lifeless man-who-doesn't-fuck. And she'll be right on both counts. I have done a monkmode light, where …
/r/MarriedRedPill22/09/21 08:46 AM
3

shouldn’t a guy only really be doing this when he’s horney and hungry for it? I've started fucking and then gotten horny. There are no rules other than those you make. I fuck when I want to. Horniness is just one reason to want to. how do you end your non ejaculative sessions? Usually she's orgasmed half a dozen times and is all shaky and sopping. I just slap her ass and give whatever aftercare may be good. Sometimes, just to fuck with her, I've just pulled out and walked off with a laugh. Again…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/09/21 01:39 AM
1

You don't have to ejaculate to fuck. I've done the latter thrice as many times as the former in the last 2 days.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 10:29 PM
1

Here it is: Dirty Talk Mastery https://b-ok.global/book/5749030/029f86 Looked it over again. Has some BP covert-contracty shit in it, but otherwise gives a basic (if not obvious) way to slowly simmer it all up.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 08:37 PM
3

Ego's a bitch.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 08:24 PM
1

will try that soon to build experience and abundance Sure.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 07:40 PM
4

I told him I don't ever want to hear those words come out of his mouth again. I do this shit in private with my kids, where others can't interfere. He's only 12 and probably just repeating bullshit he's heard. If you're defensive about it, he'll smell your fear and not trust your leadership. When I hear "happy wife, happy life," I say "pshh, a wife's only really happy when her man is" and leave it there. If it's in mature company, I say something like "it aint the money or chores that keeps this…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 06:48 PM
1

I last had sex on sunday morning and I feel pretty well drained even still now Wait. What?
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 05:27 PM
1

Your not knowing what's next was coming off in your OYS, which is why I pressed.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 05:24 PM
1

That sounds right. Can't remember exactly.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 05:23 PM
2

Fuck, yours is the most Rule 9iest I've seen on a long while. You're waiting for her to change your sex life. She can't. It's not in her DNA or programming. You're diddling her every now and again won't cut it. Being baby makers is not fucking. Ravish her with your full gift. If you can't, unfuck yourself so you can. You're obviously unattractive and/or boring at sex. Else, she'd crave it.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 02:57 PM
1

Fight Sex is up. Are you being more dominant there? If so, this could all just be a wet pussy. Can you playfully move it to sex?
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 02:49 PM
6

Rule for retards: if she mentions or references sex in a good mood, the pussy's wet. A man who fucks should be able to take it from there.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 02:41 PM
1

So what's the next level, if you care to risk a ban under Lucky's Rule n+1?
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 02:33 PM
1

If you're not 100% certain of your "no" when you give it, fog instead. If you can't fog, learn. You always have the right to change your mind. You always have the right not to make a decision on somebody else's timetable (though delay may limit opportunity). You never have to be compelled to any decision.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 02:12 PM
2

It is interesting that my weakest OYS so far got the most attention. Don't do it for attention. Nobody believes you when you're killing it. And nobody cares. Do it for yourself. Don't get bored with progress. And don't use attention (i.e., validation) as fuel. unexpected result She may be power-playing sex. You start not initiating, she starts initiating just to keep you "hooked". As long as you're just fucking when you want to (and not tolerating starfish), this little game of hers will probabl…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 02:01 PM
1

Maybe try that Dirty Talk Master book to give you an easy proven framework. Sounds like you're overthinking sex. A lot of early validation problems look more like a lack of perspective/creativity than anything. DTM, SGM, etc. can give you some tools and order - like a lifting program. But do it cuz you want to, if you want to - not for us, not for her.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 01:58 PM
1

she starts talking dirty Do you see levels to this game? Are you looking for the next level of where you want to take it? Or are you just happy with what she happens to dole out?
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 01:52 PM
1

Grabbed Untethered Soul. Thanks for the rec.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 01:49 PM
3

I wanted to give you a million children Translation: Fuck me so hard a million children fall out of my pussy. You did that then and there, right?
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 01:46 PM
2

Anger at the church for failing men the last several generations and these losses personally are conflated. Fuck anger. What has it ever done for you anyway? God is Lord of all, right? Then God ordained a church that would be a counterexample so as to challenge men to thrive on their own. Be curious. See the useful in what is challenging. Fuck anger.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 01:41 PM
1

You're overthinking sex. You know her current boundaries. You know what you like. Do what you like and nudge the boundaries out. Don't be a puss. Some of the most intense shit tests come after you've nudged a boundary, she likes it, and wonders if you're really as kinky as she wants you to be. Read My Secret Garden to get a sense of how slutty that mind of hers can get.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 01:39 PM
4

abstinence to my regular routine I once did a monkmode light, where I increased game and kino but did not initiate. That two weeks radically eliminated my neediness for sex. I could be very horny without needing sex or masturbation at all. Seemed to have a liberating effect on wife too. But I only did it once. After that, fuck when I want, which is sometimes a lot and sometimes more than a lot. I still push/pull, but never go abstinent.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 01:31 PM
4

"I'll withhold sex for week." "No prob. I'll get it elsewhere."
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/21 01:26 PM
1

I had like 5 of these over a 2-3 month period. Pretty similar to what you describe. It took me a while to get the balls to believe horns' saying that this is all just a wet pussy, but when I did - it was pivotal. Read his turning dread into desire and experiment on the next opportunity.
/r/askMRP20/09/21 06:25 PM
1

Also, smooth sailing is boring sailing.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/09/21 06:21 PM
2

https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/poc8pf/if_youre_not_fucking_shut_up_about_leadership/
/r/MarriedRedPill19/09/21 04:32 PM
9

It's a weird post. Maybe (just maybe) some new guy or two benefits from it. Yes, face the tests. But more than that - you should be fucking your wife, and all of life to boot.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/09/21 04:29 PM
3

Dude, you talk. A lot. In your own posts, and in comments on others. Yet, by your own standards, your MRP journey is an epic failing larp. How can you be giving so much advice while simultaneously judging yourself so shitty about what you're advising on? Ego? Is this all just a fucking theoretical distraction from how you love your life? Are you essentially a voyeur? Maybe you got a hard player in your wife (you didn't; AWALT). Maybe you're a slow learner (you're not; it's fear, not stupidity). …
/r/MarriedRedPill18/09/21 09:47 PM
1

The biggest danger to my mental work right now is thinking I've hit some landmark of achievement and declaring victory. I see myself doing it. Guys here have told me I haven't gotten anywhere yet. They're right. Just like they were right when they told me to start lifting and stop talking. This is what I'm processing now. Progress is it's own challenge. Ego wants to wring all validation out of it, which destroys its motivating power. Saying you've made none is a lie to yourself to avoid that fro…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/09/21 09:20 PM
0

Ten or so fucks in five or so paragraphs? Probably how I talk too. It's fun. You should try it.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/09/21 09:16 PM
2

This may be too broad-sided to be too helpful, but your writing conveys some kind of OCD quality that maybe suggests you tend to be overly precise and exacting. I infer from this that you might be bad at rolling with the punches, missing the forest for the trees, and unforgiving of your and others' failures. What do you do to try to give less fucks?
/r/MarriedRedPill18/09/21 09:12 PM
2

This whole thing ("she's pissed") is in her frame and about something that's her responsibility (the LTR). Nothing of value to take away.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/09/21 09:07 PM
3

I was equivoquating to make a point in striking way. It's a rhetorical tool. You know this. You're AMOGing that point is dumb.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/09/21 01:15 PM
3

I'm talking more about agency than blame. Fuck blame.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/09/21 02:37 AM
1

You are so small By some measurements, yes. Not so by others.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/09/21 11:28 PM
5

Better, make a purpose. And, yes. Loving myself is my favorite thing. Fuck, maybe I'll just make that my purpose. 😉 And no. I was not saying that "hitting MRP targets" will make you love yourself more. Only way to do that is to acknowledge that it's you who does it, not some magic of chasing your MRP scoreboard. I was making the point that pursuing MRP scoreboard as an end is a dead end. In short, you're agreeing with me.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/09/21 10:57 PM
1

largely irrelevant The moral aspect is, but not the causal. Fault is responsibility. A disciplined man is responsible to his own vision. It need not be externally moral.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/09/21 10:55 PM
2

Fault implies authority At one level, yes. But at the deeper level I mean, it implies potency, agency, causal responsibility. "It's all your fault." = "You're the reason." That doesn't imply authority. This is why the buck stops, and fault lies, with the chief always. He is the authority, yet remains causally responsible.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/09/21 04:11 PM
4

If you see the Buddha on the road, kill him.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/09/21 11:29 AM
1

Yeah, dude. That's a good spot. Early on, I leveraged my 'tism to process the shit out of everything, but I have been flying by feel for the last several months. Time to maybe sift through those old processes and see if any can be salvaged, repurposed, or advanced. Thanks
/r/MarriedRedPill09/09/21 01:54 AM
0

In all honesty, I don't really have much shit right now. I owned my marriage and work over the last year and have got them both where I want them. I prioritized the mental and the relational. Now, I'm really grinding with my body and mindset. Early days' motivations of fear and anger are gone. Now, it's still trying to maintain and grow without those as motivating forces - something which I've wrestled with for several months now.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/21 10:54 PM
2

OYS 16 Started learning and implementing MRP/sidebar/etc. in July 2020. late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 170.2 lbs. 34" waist 15.5" neck 17% navy 531 Full Body, Full Boring cycle week 3 | last amraps: Bench 116 x 12, Pause Back Squat 212 x 6, Deadlift 241 x 8 I think my biggest shit to own right now is that I'm giving too many fucks about self-doubts and critiques of myself on shit that doesn't matter. When I'm optimized, I'm nailing all the shit that needs to be nailed, and wisely…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/21 08:02 PM
2

Exactly. Press on the accelerator when you're already speeding.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/21 03:14 AM
3

rules defining a streak violation I did an autistic script like this in my anger phase. I actually had to count to three before responding to anyone, and then only with a gesture or facial expression, else with only a single word. Did that for like 3 weeks straight and it really, really helped me see all the time I had to make a strategic (and often minimal) response. Still will do it for a day or two when I feel I want to recenter my frame. Learned a lot. Hope you do too.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/21 02:57 AM
8

it's probably valuable for that guy to learn to cope with the existence of those bad mean words until they don't hurt him anymore. Exactly
/r/askMRP08/09/21 02:12 AM
2

I was the life of the party and that was enough. I am not sure why this sabotaging mentality has crept into my head now but I need to squash it, fast. I am going to find a way to build that 'life of the party' frame back so that is my next objective. No need to build it "back." You said you were at your best when you were the life of the part "and that was enough." It's the knowing you're "enough" part that's key. And it's amazing how that literally requires no change other than how you view (or…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/21 01:57 AM
6

I grade myself highly on the sex scale. That'll come in handy with so many telling you to go fuck yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/21 01:40 AM
2

I'm with you. Was recently at 14% and looked and felt best ever, except not increasing lift weights. Started eating to get strong and hit 17% and am now fat again. Back to work.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/21 12:50 AM
1

Huh. I just recognized this behavior in myself when I stall. Nice spot.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/09/21 12:22 AM
6

💯
/r/askMRP07/09/21 05:34 PM
9

WHY THE FUCK DO YOU CARE WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OR DO? Is there a lesson in any of this?
/r/askMRP07/09/21 02:44 PM
2

You have to get out of your head. Your head is full of the very same thoughts that produced the fucked you that you are trying to unfuck by being here. Acta non verba. To my point on the askMrp post, I had to trust myself that I could survive, advance, and grow from my fuck ups far more than I could trust myself to be a good planner or leader of myself. As I started being more daring and risk-tolerant, I saw how needlessly defensive my prior thinking was. This made it easier and easier to disreg…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/09/21 12:34 AM
1

The 'tism is indeed a tool. And a useful one to boot. But like all such tools, it only works well for some things and is often overused on too many other things. It's often used to the exclusion of other tools that are better for other tasks - like NGAF, OI, and desire. Knowing how much of each to use, and when, is the stuff of mastering yourself.
/r/askMRP06/09/21 08:37 PM
3

keep a consistent daily stream of thought Given this and your askMrp post, I'm betting you're the type who often gets carried away by the currents in most streams of thought you encounter. Instead try changing your thinking by your actions, rather than trying to change your actions by just thinking.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/09/21 08:32 PM
6

I leaned into my own 'tism on frame like this comment and OP does. It's not good for most things, but doing it on frame helped me immensely. OP, keep pushing on it. I eventually got to a point where I realized that trusting myself is my only option and if have fear about that, then that means I need to raise myself into the man in whom it is comforting to trust. That is, I trusted first, and changed second. YMMV.
/r/askMRP06/09/21 03:28 PM
2

I just went deep down the rabbit hole on cardio's relationship to muscle building, specifically: (a) when to do it, (b) what kind to do and how, and (c) how much and often. There is a lot of valid, conflicting empirical studies and conclusions. Wow. No easy consensus. So, guess I'll start experimenting on my own sample size of one.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/09/21 07:36 AM
1

Also do just regular walks. (No weight vest.). But I don't count that as cardio. With cardio, I'm trying to work my heart, raise my BMR, and lower my resting heart rate, all without joint strain or injury. Hence the stationary bike sprints.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/09/21 04:45 PM
2

I just do stationary bike sprints. Get my heart to anerobic range and keep it there for 20-30 mins. Seems best when done right after my lifts. Nothing elaborate. But if I don't do it, I get tired and fat for sure.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/09/21 01:49 PM
4

Let me have it because I know I fucked up this week. Tomorrow will be better. Translation: "I'm clueless and too lazy to get a clue. Hoping good things start happening." Your mindset is fucked. You're not worth anyone's time until you start looking at yourself as the solution to all your problems and tell us how you change and calibrate your thinking, decisions, and actions to manifest outcomes you want. Right now, you're just a cowering puppy who wants to get scolded to purge guilt and go back …
/r/MarriedRedPill01/09/21 10:21 AM
2

I don't point it out though. Except when she needs reminding of what she really is. Once they know you know. The right glance will do. No need to mention a thing. Except when they lie and say they're not. It's fun.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/09/21 01:39 AM
1

With lifting, I'm slowly converting myself not to even having goals with it, but more simply pursuing it as an ever expanding discipline. I do have goals (e.g. 1K club at sub 15% BF), but when I reach them, I expect to just keep lifting. So, they're more like waypoints, I suppose. That's the appeal of 531. It's designed for lifelong pursuit. I like this about lifting and I try to apply this mindset to other pursuits.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/08/21 11:39 PM
3

because other men here recommend doing that, and so far their recommendations work well for me. Let's see what this one does. That mindset right there has done wonders for me personally. But it did have a limit, beyond which I had to start taking ownership of what I want. What do you want?
/r/MarriedRedPill31/08/21 06:35 PM
1

But in my current mental model there is an element to bitch management. Is this an ego investment? Do you need it? Is it useful to you? Are you growing towards something else?
/r/MarriedRedPill31/08/21 05:15 PM
3

OYS 15 Started learning and implementing MRP/sidebar/etc. in July 2020. late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 166.8 lbs. 33.5" waist 15.5" neck 16% navy 531 BBB (30% 5x10s) week 2 | last amraps: Rest-Pause Bench 135 x 8, Pause Back Squat 169 x 10, Rest-Pause Press 93 x 7, Deadlift 241 x 8 "Only losers get bored with progress." "Optimal results are obtained by training optimally, not maximally." Jim Wendler. I've spent the last couple of weeks internalizing this. It's so true. My ego get…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/08/21 05:02 PM
9

My divorced parents sued each other for most of my childhood. I was able to see through much of their bullshit and find ways to adapt. While I did fuck myself, that wasn't their fault. He will be a man soon. Your gifts will become more valuable to him as he matures. You are more of a model than an instructor anyway. And when he's an adult he will choose for himself. There's a long game here. Yes. This is all out of your control. Yes. We all only have our turns with our kids. Back to work.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/08/21 03:39 PM
10

I am a naturally born butt hurt Fuck you. You choose to be this way. Stop this fucking bullshit. Choose something better for yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/08/21 03:30 PM
2

I moved on with the night by shifting the discussion over to fun activities from vacation. ... I then proceeded to carry her upstairs and had some great, fun sex. ... Afterward, I could not believe the night play out that way. ... I felt like something finally clicked this week and I'm moving in the right direction. The click is that you made a conscious decision to change the dynamic and tone. And you somehow put together that the negative energy was a wet pussy. Calibrate to play around with t…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/08/21 01:36 PM
1

I've started reading My Secret Garden, as I've found it in some recommendations when browsing MRP. Shit, that is another eye opener. Seems that most female fantasies are about their being taken/used. I mean it does ties nicely what MRP is telling. Shit, we even have real-life proofs of that with the Shades of Grey books/movie being so popular. Women want to be taken by men. It's my job to be a man that takes what he wants. 100% It's brings the Madonna-whore complex into full view. So many women …
/r/MarriedRedPill31/08/21 01:29 PM
5

constantly complaining passenger. I feel like this is what I am living with. You're probably right, but no one fucking cares. I don't know if it will ever transition into a Captain/FO type relationship Just be a fucking captain. It doesn't matter if she signs on as your FO. Nothing prevents you from captaining except you.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/08/21 01:18 PM
6

told me she has told me not to do that "I know. But I'm bad with rules." = Playful and that I wouldnt want her to touch my dick when watching TV. "Maybe try again? This time with your mouth, though." = Playful Left the room and went to bed. Anxiety and anger for several hours. = Butthurt (anti-playful)
/r/MarriedRedPill31/08/21 01:14 PM
3

“if after we eat you are still acting like a bitch, I am going to drop you off at home and go out to have fun with the kid alone” then kissed her neck. Nice, but it gets even better when you can do it playfully. "Keep acting like a brat, and I'll have to spank you like one." she feels like I don’t love her during shark week They all feel this way. It's part of the hormone feefees. Comfort can help if you want to give it. and she feels like I am walking around like a loaded gun with pent up sexua…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/08/21 12:44 PM
2

Having at least one good wife that improves your life in a way you appreciate.
/r/askMRP31/08/21 02:34 AM
5

Push/pull with kino. Google "lovedrop kino" on YouTube. But ultimately, there's no way to fake not being needy. Your time is better spent fixing that.
/r/askMRP30/08/21 10:56 PM
2

"Monk mode" never had anything to do with affecting her perception or increasing successful initiations. It was just for needy dudes to take sex off the table for a given period and become less needy. But too many guys are too needy to do in it without falling into her frame (a la' how you've interpreted it). That's why it's hardly ever advised anymore. (Other than in NMMNG.) Better mental gains were found from cavemen than monks.
/r/askMRP28/08/21 05:37 PM
13

Same shit with my mom. She's a woman, so she's conditioned and hardwired to do womanish shit. But some women, like our mom's, play that game super hard. Your options are not mutually exclusive. You can not give a fuck always. You can talk to her sometimes and pull back other times. You don't need her permission or ours. Ultimatums are dumb. Always keep your options open. Grow the frame to be able to ignore her and truly NGAF. If you can help her, and want to, by all means. But don't let her drag…
/r/askMRP28/08/21 01:24 AM
7

Would a man who has frame post what you post, feel what you feel, and regret what you regret?
/r/askMRP27/08/21 01:31 AM
5

after freshly coming off reading TRM Including the very first chapters? On oneitis? Ring any bells?
/r/askMRP27/08/21 12:39 AM
2

2 - Be careful and dont initiate often or just when you are certain to succeed. You dont want to condition your wife to deny you nor scare the cat until you are attractive and your neediness will do more harm than if you just keep your hands away Who said this? Where?
/r/askMRP26/08/21 10:28 PM
2

Damn. Glad you profited.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/08/21 02:04 PM
0

This shocks me. Did you do cardio to increase appetite? Building all that muscle in such a short time is a lot of lifting, mobility, cooking, eating, and sleeping. I mean the time investment with all that must've been immense. How did you have time and energy enough to fuck, work, and parent too?
/r/MarriedRedPill26/08/21 01:22 PM
3

OYS 14 Extra STFU this week and last. Tweaked shoulder and bicep on Week 4 of Madcow, along with excessive fatigue everywhere. Doing BBB cycle or two to see if less volume for a bit allows recovery. Noticed excessive need for validation in social interactions, so spending more time than usual with my favorite person. Still fucking with abandon.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/08/21 12:54 AM
3

https://giphy.com/gifs/basketball-kobe-bryant-7rqiYoGahYG3K
/r/askMRP21/08/21 07:29 PM
1

Lol. Yeah. In fact, just bought new pants. 30's and 32's. Crazy.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/08/21 08:04 PM
1

Fair. I'm frittering away energy here that I can direct toward myself. Nobody here needs me. Good call. Thanks
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 07:06 PM
1

💯
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 05:37 PM
1

Whatever, man. Just don't forget that training wheels is not a bike.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 05:17 PM
2

“I tried to be a great father. Your mother (his ex wife) wouldn’t let me be one. She made me miserable” and I just left it at that. But to be fair. He is with a new woman and over the years is the calmest nicest dude I ever met. So maybe there was something to that. It doesn't matter. Good that you aren't angry. Hope you see this as confirmation that he's modeled a very blue pill approach to marriage and parenthood for you, and you'll have to step out from the shadow of the conditioning you've h…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 05:13 PM
2

I know why, and it's still rooted in your belief that you still need to "improve". Yep. I've lost sight of being the prize and really loving myself. Living for validation in these gaming excursions. I want to work my way out of that.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 03:33 PM
0

I'm not watching this, because I know I could find him also saying don't be a faggot and let YouTubers schedule your fucking for you. Do retard shit for as long as necessary, but no longer.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 03:31 PM
3

That said, I have a role play planned for first day of school and we'll need several sets of sheets for that day.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 03:11 PM
3

seeing a huge spike in quality after u/HornsOfApathy suggested reading. HIGHLY recommend every new guy here reads it does what it says ASAP. FTFY
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 02:38 PM
1

STFU is key here, but in line of direct questioning my default is often to just lie. At some level, I'm still afraid of her reaction to certain things, and it is a cop out to avoid the truth because I'm in her frame. Play around with looks and facial expressions. Horns has a post on communicating without words. It's way more assertive and dominant. Can help develop the frame past autistic STFU.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 02:34 PM
1

Life is a never-ending series of lesson and life is patient enough to repeat lessons until you internalize them. Word
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 02:32 PM
0

I workout every evening. I'll initiate and if I get a no just continue as I planned and workout. Unless someone has other suggestions. Initiate when you wanna fuck, which can be whenever. Don't schedule that shit. It's boring and predictable. Game always, even (especially) when you don't wanna fuck.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 02:30 PM
2

food will either sit in a landfill, or sit on my gut. My choice. You are starting to view yourself as slightly better than a landfill. Congratulations! (This was so cringe to me because it was so familiar to me.)
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 02:07 PM
4

OYS 13 Started learning and implementing MRP/sidebar/etc. in July 2020. late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 166.4 lbs. 32.5" waist 15.5" neck 16% navy madcow last topsets: week 3 BS 180x5 BP 147x5 PR 135x5 IB 116x5 DL 246x5 SHIT TO OWN ... GENERAL FRAME/MENTALITY Complacency is my primary foe right now. My life is so manifestly better right now than it was a year ago at this time, that there is a strong pull to "call it good" and coast. I mentioned several OYSes ago that I'm trying to…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 01:59 PM
5

She went on over time to make a number of comments about emotional connection, feelings, emotional vulnerability, intimacy, etc. I was unsure of what to make of this. Comfort test, dude. Hard to identify/deal with when you are afraid of your own betaness. But remember that alpha/beta is not good/bad. There's good beta: warmth, flirty, friendly, assuring. Dig for that; it's in there somewhere.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 01:42 PM
4

What I Don’t Want Maybe worthwhile looking at this for a bit. But keep in mind that the mind doesn't do well with negatives. It tends to fixate on them. What you resist persists. Consider moving your outlook to a positive, like: What I truly want.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 01:38 PM
5

To drop my ego/hateful Attitude towards others and see the good and lesson in everyone I meet. To get a good understanding of myself, to confident and comfortable with myself and become the Highest value male I can be. Pretty damn good mission, I think. Not a destination, but something to raise your ceiling with. My frame is shit. This is one of my top priorities. The more I have been reading and digging into this. The more I am uncovering the layers and figure myself out. Right on. STFU was key…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 01:31 PM
7

Diet: It was brought up in my last OYS that I was not addressing my diet. Actually, BF was brought up and you read it as diet. I was once your BF and lifted more than you have posted. But after years of feeling like shit and telling myself it was worth it because I was "strong" (even though those lifts aren't really that impressive) I traded strength to get much leaner. Maybe not your cup of tea, but all the IOIs and other "attractive" validations started at around 18% BF and got better as I wen…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/21 12:52 PM
3

https://www.reddit.com/r/RedPillWives/wiki/welcome
/r/askMRP17/08/21 09:36 AM
0

Is this lashing out at all useful to you? Does it reveal anything to you at all about yourself? It's revealing to us that you don't understand admit how fat 30% bf is (very), yet agree that you "wouldn't fuck you." It's revealing to us that you refer to your own "bitch ego" but lash out when someone offers advice on addressing it. Is this the DEERing and avoidance you describe about yourself? What are you doing about that?
/r/MarriedRedPill14/08/21 05:48 AM
0

I don't give a fuck what you think my priorities should be. Yet, here you are posting them for us to comment on. This tantrum should be revealing to you that, In addition to getting unfat, you also have lots of work to do on your massive and shitty ego. I recommend Power of Now.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/08/21 02:35 AM
3

it takes time As much or as little as you decide. Almost all of this is mental, and your mind can make decisions at light speed. It's just a matter of changing your decisions, repeatedly. The learning curve lengthens and steepens the more you use it as an excuse.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/21 01:57 PM
4

An HVM in his own frame is happy because his days are valuable and a day spent unhappy just isn't worth it, and he knows what to do to find enjoyment. Giving her a lever to pull on and control your mood is just living in her frame. Frame is not passive. You have to exert a bit to keep it running and growing. You develop that skill by passing these tests. Withholding sex is just a frame test. Each time you let it affect you, you fail. Abundance is about how you approach everything. The world is f…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/21 10:18 PM
2

Trying to figure out how to get less upset at things that don't go my way and figuring out what frame really means. This oozes from every word you write. You're one angry motherfucker. And you have zero frame. How useful has anger been for you? I hope you like timeouts, cuz I'm guessing you can't avoid serial bans for at least six months.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/21 08:48 PM
2

Judge for yourself
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/21 01:29 PM
2

FWIW, you are coming off detached and secure, which means you're not needy. But you're also coming off a bit disappointed, and I don't know what that means.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/21 11:28 AM
4

Fully knowing yourself might be overrated. Perhaps it's better to always be learning about yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/21 02:11 AM
1

Sounds like how sex should feel: Fun at the time but no biggie now. By "satisfaction," were you meaning (and expecting) "validation"?
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/21 12:55 AM
1

I've read the same. Hence my hesitancy.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 10:05 PM
2

I am quite disciplined with going to the gym but tend to let things slip when I can’t get to the gym Just getting to the gym is the necessary condition for developing discipline. Discipline is completing the gym stuff in an effective manner, repeatedly. Don't blow smoke up your own ass.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 10:03 PM
1

it also felt empty in a way. Every glass is a bit empty. How full was this one?
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 09:58 PM
2

Assertive leadership is authentic when performed by high value people; nice guys simply see it as manipulation, which must be inherently bad. Bingo. Leaders maneuver. Nice guys judge.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 09:54 PM
1

stick with my PRs that are within the year Validation seeking is a HUGE HUGE problem for me See how these are related?
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 09:06 PM
3

she knows my weaknesses and tests them Of course. That's literally her fucking job. Stop wanting it to "end," just get better at it. Also, I need to correct what I said earlier. You don't have "weak" frame; you have "no" frame. And it's not that you don't love "yourself enough"; it's that you care too much about how much other people love you. You are keying your worth to others' esteem of you, but you don't seem to display anything of your own esteem for yourself. Start esteeming yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 06:52 PM
2

I legit thought we share our most recent PRs. You share what you want, and we see what that reveals about you. I will course correct. Whose "course"? What's "correct"? In any case I think you are saying stop looking for validation from others in my mission and realize that my wife is just like any other woman. Getting warmer.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 06:48 PM
3

it really escalated from a feeling of self hatred and loathing. I could’ve avoided it if I had just been more laid back or forgiving of myself Yep. All that rage and entitlement stems ultimately from a place of judgment - where you are a shitty person who judges the shit out of yourself and then rage to the fact that you're being judged by a shitty person. Stopping the judging stops the raging. Loving with curiosity stops the judging.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 04:57 PM
3

Self esteem is still my issue. I can see that my wife has done everything she could to keep mine low. Interestingly, my coworker has been trying to build mine up. Personally, I continue to neglect working on this, caught up on too much of my day to day. I barely did some meditation on negative self talk, but continue to write daily. Do you see that your self esteem is still held in the frame of your wife or your co-worker? This doesn't mean you have low self-esteem, it means you have no self-est…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 04:54 PM
3

while Im not doing lower body lifts How do you post weight for lifts you're not doing? To be a Man others look up to for inspiration, strength, leadership, and advice Might as well think this, since these people obviously hold your balls too. the wife Do you see how you talk about her like she's a fucking deity? Or some kind of force in your life? Fuck me, dude. Is she your wife? Or perhaps someone else's?
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 04:45 PM
2

Told him that he need to obey me or her even when not agreeing with arguments of negative consequences in life if you are not able to do it. He returned and apologized. I don't know dude. I don't see the benefit of helping squeeze your son into her frame. It seems pretty full with you in there too. Looks more to me like both of them are acting cunty, meaning both of them need your leadership and discipline (not hers).
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 04:43 PM
2

I don’t feel like there is much else I can be doing in terms of diet, exercise, sleep, etc. habits in term of prevention. If this is what you truly think, then you really have lost. Your body, like everything else in a man's life, is a challenge personal to you. It will test your ability to influence it. You have to find its levers and gears and you have to tweak them in the right way. It's a massive puzzle. But if you think it's not worth solving, then perhaps you're right.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 04:40 PM
13

Each day I extend a rope to move forward and start the day fresh, but my wife declines to take it so I just withdraw time/attention. This was the meat-and-potatoes of the 1000' rope for me. Just wake up every morning like it's Groundhog Day and calibrate for your own desires. Banish anger and resentment. Takes awhile. But it tempers you. It's good training to show you that you truly are the one who dictates his own perspective, mood, and frame. It's a marathon frame test.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 04:35 PM
3

You're still missing what u/donmcde is saying. Every "action" (not thought, recognition, idea, framing, etc.) is a vote for the man you want to be. If your "action" is to sit there and think shitty thoughts about your past-self, then that's a vote for being a guy who just does that, which is pretty shitty. Identify actions to do and get off your ass and do them.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 04:30 PM
2

it's more than okay to just do what I wanted. Make a long fucking list and get creative at doing what you want. There's a word for doing what you want: "living".
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 04:26 PM
2

I am allowing myself to see the what I was up to and it's more Machiavellian than I would like to admit. Sounds like a big fucking breakthrough. Lean into that shit. I could walk out on my life today. This is rocket fuel.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 04:10 PM
4

Nice work on asserting yourself in your career.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 04:05 PM
5

you shouldn’t talk like that to me Angry nice guys are full of shoulds. Start STFUing and banish this word from your mouth. Men of value don't argue about "should", they just say what they want and have a plan for getting it, one way or another.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 04:02 PM
8

222 pounds. 30% BF ... Goals for the week: 1.) Help daughter get potty trained. No more diapers after first change. Have to go to big girl panties 2.) I have allowed the clutter in my house to get out of hand. No one else is going to de-clutter that shit. If it doesn't bring me joy New goal for the week: figure out how to not be fat anymore (i.e. get your own big girl panties in order).
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 03:56 PM
4

Among all the exercises that Glover suggests to regain personal power, the most meaningful to me is developing integrity. I am capable of being honest when negative consequences hurt me only, but I have often been dishonest to avoid interpersonal conflict. I want to think of myself as a man with integrity. I don't know what integrity means to you, but most men I know who make an ego identification with it fly into an enormous fucking rage when anyone impugns their "character", which just reveals…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 03:53 PM
3

OYS 12 Started learning and implementing MRP/sidebar/etc. in July 2020. late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 165.7 lbs. 32.5" waist 15.5" neck 14% navy madcow last topsets: week 2 BS 175x5 BP 144x5 PR 131x5 IB 113x5 DL 240x5 SHIT TO OWN ... PARENTING So, a review of my OYSes show that I've not been focusing on this aspect much and have even been conscious of it drifting while tending to other shit. This week it, as these things tend to do, became the squeaky wheel and signaled a need f…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 03:43 PM
3

this dude can feel free to fuck off. Hope you do feel that freedom. It's true freedom.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 12:57 PM
3

Don't get a covert contract going on kino. You might kino and still not fuck. Kino and game isn't to achieve sex. It's just what you do. Sex isn't a goal. It's just a fun way to spend time. You don't threaten the slut out of her, you attract and invite it. Her storming out if the room after you fogged her rejection is a good sign. Her power games with sex are losing effect and she's frustrated. Let it build. Eventually, she'll find she can channel those feels into a good cockride. But that's all…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 12:53 PM
1

divorce term was mentioned "Everybody's got to do what they gotta do." "We both know where the door is."
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 12:45 PM
21

my first widow Do you have to kill their husbands first? (Sorry. I'm new to this level of dread.)
/r/askMRP10/08/21 01:47 AM
–

She still might need time to adjust Who fucking cares? Does she matter here?
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/21 01:07 AM
17

Maybe some guys will give widows a try instead of going MGTOW? Any good stories? Your post history says you went MGTOW until you found a widow and are fearful of regressing blue pill. Are you wanting us to validate your choices? Do you know what MRP is for?
/r/askMRP10/08/21 12:49 AM
1

discomfort Think of it as resistance, like weight on a bar. Used properly, it can help you stimulate growth.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/08/21 12:57 AM
2

I don’t feel like a prize: I feel like a loser who has historically been OK at giving the impression that he thinks he’s a prize. Which is exactly what I have been and currently am. Solution: turn myself into a prize. I’m strong, I’m currently leaning out, I’m reasonably handsome, my hygiene and style are good. What I need is an ability to work properly so that I can feel as financially secure as I look on paper, and a better social life. I have great friends, most of whom look up to me as a rol…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/08/21 02:03 AM
3

https://www.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/oqi6n0/-/h6fj6xn
/r/askMRP07/08/21 06:07 PM
27

I can almost feel what everyone else in the room is feeling This is a gift and means you're perceptive. and have this need to make them feel comfortable This is where you lose frame. When you acquire frame, you'll be able to use your powers of perception for your own advantage, which may or may not make people comfortable.
/r/askMRP07/08/21 05:13 PM
2

https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/4z84w5/posting_quality_guide_for_rmarriedredpill/
/r/MarriedRedPill07/08/21 04:05 PM
2

Yep. That's "it." And it applies to much more than sex.
/r/askMRP06/08/21 06:38 PM
3

I decided WTF, I’ll give it a try, it sounds corny, but what have I got to lose This is true OI and it's how you think more or less about almost everything when you find and cultivate abundance.
/r/askMRP06/08/21 04:26 PM
4

Thanks for this. One of my own assertive techniques to share: "I understand you want/think X, but I want Y and that is more important to me." I don't explain my want. If pressed, I broken record the want, or I describe my worldview that having my wants met is my top priority. But I don't engage on any "why" I "should" or "shouldn't" want Y. If they say, they don't understand why I want Y, I say it's not important to me that they do understand. I sometimes also demonstrate that I have a plan and …
/r/MarriedRedPill05/08/21 12:38 PM
3

From what I've seen in the year plus I've been chugging OYS, your gifts have usually been a very distinctive contribution. Cool that you think the season for them has closed for now, but they'll be missed while you're gone. I haven't seen a guy come in and blaze a trail to success since Horns. You mean other than u/Alex_J_Anderson, of course.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/21 10:01 PM
2

https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/jw7qxz/how_to_own_your_shit_a_guide_for_retards/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/21 09:41 PM
1

Fucking great thread, u/weakandsensitive and u/rocknrollchuck.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/21 09:28 PM
1

Glad you're finding humor in the accusations. Sounded like earlier in the week you gave a few too many fucks about what paranoid simps think of your morality.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/21 09:16 PM
1

I did it earlier than a year, and wish I'd've done it even earlier. I know u/hornsofapathy says it's for advanced users, but I think he's being merciful to avoid Rambos blowing up marriages. For me, it got my ass in gear. It advanced me.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/21 09:07 PM
1

because I'm fucking awesome Exactly. And if you can't think of yourself as awesome now, imagine an awesome future self and do today what that guy will need done so that he exists.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/21 08:52 PM
1

I know that I'm not in any unique spot. I can fuck most of the time I need to, but I'm not finding my partner to be equally eager to do so. I know that it's normal and might take time and my effort to allow her to adjust. When I thought more about that last sex we've had, I've realized few things: I did not perform any kino the whole day, we've had a tough day in general, and I only initiated in bed. So the "she's not attracted to me"/"I'm not Chris Hemsworth" arguments are not entirely valid at…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/21 03:00 PM
1

Understandable. But these are all very anger-phasy rationalizations. Entertaining conflict is walking into her frame, most of the time. I wanted it to stop. The challenges never stop. Wanting them to stop is wanting to not be challenged, which is wanting not to grow. You can't control what she does. Wanting to is staying in her frame. Now, if you're saying, "I wanted to start asserting myself," then that's doing outwardly the same thing but for a completely different reason, one that's from your…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/21 02:34 PM
1

Just don't ruin it with needy outcome dependence. Let the chips fall.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/21 01:50 AM
1

Don't wait for "stages" to end. You are the driver. Propel yourself past them.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 11:26 PM
1

Fun. Isn't it?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 09:46 PM
5

Loaded with covert contracts.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 09:05 PM
2

JESUS. THE PROBLEM AIN'T THE READING, AND THE READING AIN'T THE PROBLEM. It's the doing. You're not doing the doing. Manuel Smith can't put you first.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 08:56 PM
1

Haha. Yeah. Like Dennis Hopper in Speed.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 07:42 PM
5

She is projecting a lot of feelings onto me and I think my best option is to go back to the basics. Going back is why you don't seem to advance. The problem ain't the reading, dude. These are all tests about whether you're the real deal, and every DEER with her, and every post with us, you prove just one thing - YOU DON'T THINK YOU'RE THE REAL DEAL. Why the fuck not? What makes real deals around here? What if it's just that at some point they decided that they are the most important things in th…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 06:43 PM
2

The quarterly shit test of “Why are you being so healthy – who are you doing this for – I liked you better when you were fat” made its rounds again during our anniversary night out just before vacation. Sparked by her being hammered, which is usually when it happens. I fogged most of it, but DEERed at times. This is an ongoing blind spot for me. Nuke that shit: "It's good for me. I do it because I like me more than your opinion of what I should do." You've been at this too long not to be able to…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 06:32 PM
3

BF estimated at 23-27% I'm the last dude on here to take fitness advice from, but I needed to add cardio to powerlifting to move this number down. YMMV.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 06:29 PM
2

Tell her to suck your cock in the other room before the kids go to bed, then walk away during the blowjob. Ten bucks says she's DTF later. If not, doesn't matter, got blown.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 06:24 PM
2

Starfishy, dude. Maybe all you can muster right now. What do you want?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 06:23 PM
1

Now I find myself thinking about what my life would look like post-divorce and asking myself if that’s what I really want. After talking with a few divorce lawyers and getting a better idea what courts typically do in my area, the financial aspect won’t be as bad as I originally thought. I sensed that it was the financial aspect that prevented me from being willing to move forward before. It’s interesting how being open to nuking it all has allowed me to be more authentic in my relationship, mor…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 06:21 PM
1

if that's the way she'll treat me, I'll let her deal with things herself going forward. I get some bullshit in response, and I told her "okay," and then went to sleep. I was somewhat surprised there wasn't more drama afterward; however, I'll continue to monitor this boundary and act accordingly. These are hard when you're on your come-up. I found it hard to set boundaries without coming off butthurt, largely because being butthurt was the only way I knew then. Now, if my wife does something I th…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 06:19 PM
2

my marriage was set up as inevitable face off from the beginning Do you see how you're a victim in this frame? Please stop that.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 06:13 PM
1

Based on what and how you write, this may sting - so reread this a few times until you remember that you don't give a fuck about what some internet stranger thinks: Fuck this post and the horse it rode in on. Have you gotten anything down this depressing trip through memory lane? If so, show us that. That's the treasure - the nourishing good you can bring to the present and future. But without that, these strolls down memory lane are just like running shitty gas through your engine. Here is the …
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 06:09 PM
1

Yeah. I'm defensive about it. Old-me would feel "off" and haul off looking for silver-bullet panaceas not just to get feeling "right" again, but to make sure "off" never recurs. Now, I strategically just try to note the feelz, but remind that I'm not my feelz. Waves will calm, and I'll return to level. Eventually, I might be able to lean into these little ripples in the force and see what they're telling me. But I'm being defensive with them now strategically. I know that's not the longterm winn…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 06:01 PM
1

Just enjoy the game bro. ... shit that doesn't matter. Yep. Truth. Thanks
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 05:45 PM
4

Make sex fun from your frame. Think of things you've never done and just say you want to do it. Or, better, just fucking do it. If you need ideas,I hear the internet has plenty of videos.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 05:20 PM
0

Stop Start trying to fuck people's wives, dude. Lol.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 05:15 PM
1

Do you have boring sex?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 05:09 PM
2

If you want to get better at not being a dick, maybe try not being a dick to yourself. You have yourself with you all the time, if you can improve yourself without all the judgment and shame, then you can free up what you want to be. Try liking yourself a little.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 05:07 PM
1

OYS 11 Started learning and implementing MRP/sidebar/etc. in July 2020. late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 168.6 lbs. 16% navy madcow last topsets: week 1 BS 170x5 BP 140x5 PR 130x5 IB 110x5 DL 235x5 SHIT TO OWN ... LIFTING/FITNESS u/ReddJive 's post last week mattered to me. I've been working out, not training. Strength is a skill, and I'm bad at it. I may look better than I have in decades, but I'm not stronger than I was even two years ago. And that's not cool with me. I've been d…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/21 04:20 PM
9

That's exactly what I mean by not doing the work. You set yourself against the world, rather than making yourself the only thing in the world that matters. Common approach that commonly fails. Fixate on growth in the freedom you have and are growing, not on the prison you are escaping. I'll put it this way, if you really loved and like yourself, then being yourself would be enough for you here, and you'd be on the other end of this conversation. Also, when did telling yourself that you've done e…
/r/askMRP03/08/21 01:48 PM
3

You can't "get her in your frame". You need to get out of hers. Unfuck yourself. If your frame is strong and welcoming then, and if she's a submissive female, she'll walk into your frame. Big ifs. If you unfuck yourself, and she doesn't change, you'll see why this harpy cunt is your fault, and you'll understand why you won't need anyone's permission to leave her.
/r/askMRP03/08/21 12:17 PM
14

There is nothing wrong with you. You are just unskilled at living at your edge. You are doing what other people recommend, not what you truly desire. You have not done the hard work of NGAF about what the world expects/wants and instead making yourself the man you want to be. Good news is you can start now. If you don't know what your mission is, then you know your mission is exploring yourself.
/r/askMRP03/08/21 11:50 AM
6

Right. WTF are you doing about it, OP, other than complaining to internet strangers?
/r/askMRP02/08/21 02:40 PM
7

If only there were some places with resources where a man could go to learn how to unfuck himself when he is the last to be informed that his marriage turned to shit ....
/r/askMRP02/08/21 01:41 AM
2

Do you get anything out of these serial askMRP posts? Why not OYS? You seem to want it. Fear? Can you do hard things?
/r/askMRP02/08/21 01:01 AM
1

It's true. I just re-read it and found it valuable. There's even a nod to J10's criticism. Can't forgive dumbfucks for not reading the fine print when playing with dynamite. All of that said, I feel there's got to be a more efficient way to lay out the progress with the 1000' rope metaphor rather than Kay's/BPP FMOFY build-up. For me, MRP got easier more understandable and beneficial when I, very early on, prepared to begin, and visualized enjoying, a life without marriage. It was through that p…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/08/21 05:07 PM
19

Fuck. I needed this. Thanks
/r/MarriedRedPill31/07/21 01:24 AM
1

This ^
/r/MarriedRedPill30/07/21 03:13 PM
2

porn isn’t the problem, my behavior is. The core issue is really my behavior, habits and mindset. And the core of that core issue is not as much about stopping doing unuseful things as it is starting and keeping doing the useful things. Most guys here spend too much time and attention fixating on their problems and not nearly enough time and attention on trying new and better shit to do. If you fill your plate with the good shit, you end up crowding out the bad shit.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/07/21 07:27 AM
1

This all sounds right. But stay out of her frame. A couple of times you dipped in there. Just go for what you want and be fine with a no.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/07/21 03:33 AM
2

behavior, habits and mindset Or "mental models".
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/21 09:28 PM
1

Modeling gets into some pretty advanced stuff. So, I'll say a bit about it and close with a word of caution. At its simplest, modeling is just teaching by example. Think of how a model teaches how certain clothes can be paired and worn. You're consciously and unconsciously always teaching and learning through modeling. When you're teaching, you're the model. When you're learning, you're learning from the model. Most times, the teacher, and hence the model, is the authority or dominant in the rel…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/21 09:18 PM
1

Exactly. Urges had a moral judgment attached to it. I bet if you analyze that judgment, you'll find it's completely useless to you and you can therefore just let it go and start considering your porn activity etc. purely from the standpoint of whether it is effective in helping you actualize your deepest desires. It may or may not be. It was an obstacle for me for years, but now I use it occasionally to game my wife or to rev up my engine when I want that mental state. But I don't fuck my hand a…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/21 04:30 PM
2

I said "appetites". You said "urges". Why'd you think it necessary to make that change? What does that say about how you perceive yourself here?
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/21 07:53 AM
2

"Addiction" and "unhealthy relationship" both trump up, feed, and fixate on the "problem.* What if there is no problem? What if you have perfectly healthy and natural sexual appetites but you are unskilled at satisfying them? You choose what's bad and what's good. Your life gets better as you replace what you deem bad with what you deem good. The key is finding the replacements and not fixating on the things that need replacing. I say all of this as someone who once described himself as "addicte…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/21 04:30 AM
1

I’m waking up every morning hard as fuck and some days I get really obsessed from the get go, thinking about how might I get sex that day, when I’m gonna get it next, how many times might I get it that week, how am I gonna insert DEVI into it. This may sound dumb/obvious, but the key for me getting to on-demand/free use in my house is that when I feel this way, I just went and took what I wanted. Sure, at first there was the LMR and rejections etc. But as I got OI and just kept at it, all that m…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/21 03:11 AM
2

I'm not sure what my true mission is yet, but that doesn't mean I can't be a man of action today. Exactly. If you don't know what your mission is, you know your mission is exploring yourself. So, get at it! I'm addicted to porn. Fuck! What is this? Who the fuck diagnosed this? You? What the fuck do you know about addiction? Your body wants to fuck in the worst way. So, start getting out in the world and gaming. Game for game's sake. Channel that libido into actually seducing a woman. Don't try a…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/21 03:04 AM
1

You should ditch all of BPP's content. It's even been removed from all the sidebar for a reason. Honestly, a sidebar-linked post from a mod might be good to explain this. ... Or lazy dumbfucks can continue to burn in flames. I'm cool either way. Also, BPP's 12 levels post is still linked in the MRP wiki.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/21 02:59 AM
2

a lot of correlations I guess there are. Surprised I haven't seen that sooner. Thanks for pointing that out.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/21 02:37 AM
1

MRP has evolved dread a lot since Kay and BPP. And you'd be wise to search around and find out why it can be a huge covert contract if leveraged actively. Maybe that's your thing, I guess. You also speak in odd fatalisms and absolutes a lot, which reveals limitations in your thinking. Reread your own OYS and identify those. Then question if you really have grounds for holding on to those beliefs so strongly. Maybe the world and you are different than they currently appear to you.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/21 02:35 AM
3

Your "physical" section is very "ish," which I take to mean you aren't currently doing shit. Fix that first. Don't bullshit. Post what you're doing. No ego.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/21 02:27 AM
3

Fair. That really is the RP advice. I was off.
/r/askMRP28/07/21 03:09 PM
1

I don't think it's too much self esteem. I think it's too little. I think you really think of yourself as unworthy of other people's time and help. This is not how the prize sees it. He sees people as generally doing what they want to do, so when people express interest in helping or hanging, it's because they want to spend time with the prize. If the people really are a drag, then have no guilt or shame about NGAF about them. But you're straddling the fence. You care too much to hang with them …
/r/MarriedRedPill28/07/21 01:33 PM
2

experience here? Recently discussed at length.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/07/21 01:25 PM
1

fitter for my mission Yes! This is abundance, where you are able to take what seems to be opposition and turn it into assistance. This is a great comment thread.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/07/21 01:17 PM
4

The red pill advice here is to make her a plate, at most. Maybe she can work her way up from there, but it'll be a while and require lots of qualification. Exclusive LTR, though? Why bother? Go fish.
/r/askMRP28/07/21 12:58 PM
1

Not only did I give him advice above, but I also gave him advice below on seeking advice instead of lazily just asking what I mean. As for you, who have contributed nothing, my advice is: fuck off.
/r/askMRP27/07/21 10:25 PM
1

Paint by numbers is good for a while. But don't be so defensive that you never push yourself. You'll get better advice if you show a little effort in interpreting it and initiative in testing it. A good formula: "I tried W because I thought X, but it resulted in Y, when I was aiming for Z. What am I missing?" If someone replies with advice you don't understand, then a good formula is: "By X, do you mean ... ?"
/r/askMRP27/07/21 07:23 PM
4

Also: How I Communicate Now, Without Words
/r/askMRP27/07/21 06:59 PM
-1

More important than whether you talk is that your presence and words are congruent with you as you do. Eventually, you have to move from mute to fully functioning man. May be some trial and error involved, but if you can check ego and calibrate, and if you truly give just one fuck, it gets pretty easy and enjoyable. My wife digs at me for how I've changed my thinking and outlook. Other friends have too. It's infectious, but you can't think they'll actually understand. In fact, I relish the myste…
/r/askMRP27/07/21 06:23 PM
2

More than this, though, it's the mental fallacy of thinking you can't learn from someone you judge as inferior. Change yourself to learn from everyone (either by example or by counterexample). Over time you'll understand yours and others' shortcomings more, and you get better at overcoming them. Abundance is approaching everything and everyone with the perspective that they can be worked in your favor. Judgmentalism is scarcity.
/r/askMRP27/07/21 06:17 PM
4

Nice double entendre.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 05:24 PM
9

OYS 10 Started learning and implementing MRP/sidebar/etc. in July 2020. late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 171.1 lbs. 18% navy phul: last heavy workset total reps: BP 165x9 BS 195x9 DL 260x12 SHIT TO OWN ... CAREER Big things happening here. That big deal that I've been talking about bringing-in for several OYSes has landed, I have a team working it, and it just keeps growing. If it plays out as currently penciled, we're talking about half of my personal goal for each of the next thr…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 03:59 PM
2

No plans on leaving just yet. I want to be here. I've not outgrown this place. It continues to help me grow, and I enjoy sharing it here too.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 03:43 PM
2

You're coming along very well and giving good advice Thanks. Means a lot coming from you.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 02:53 PM
2

When you give it to a woman, you need to be very clear that you expect her to use it and it's a critical part to a healthy sexual relationship as you push boundaries. 100%. I told mine "You are not a victim. You have a powerful voice. Use it!"
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 02:43 PM
2

When I got back from my trip I hadn’t seen / talked to wife in days. The day I got back, after dinner I laid down in bed. She came in and surprised me with a BJ out of nowhere. Afterwards I was still in the mood so I started touching her. After quite a while of that she hadn’t come but she pulled me on top of her. I fucked her and she told me to cum in her. Done. Afterwards we’re lying there and shes in some kind of mood and asks “do you think I came during any of that?” I say no. Then I say ‘if…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 02:32 PM
1

When I got back from my trip I hadn’t seen / talked to wife in days. The day I got back, after dinner I laid down in bed. She came in and surprised me with a BJ out of nowhere. Afterwards I was still in the mood so I started touching her. After quite a while of that she hadn’t come but she pulled me on top of her. I fucked her and she told me to cum in her. Done. Afterwards we’re lying there and shes in some kind of mood and asks “do you think I came during any of that?” I say no. Then I say ‘if…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 02:32 PM
1

When I got back from my trip I hadn’t seen / talked to wife in days. The day I got back, after dinner I laid down in bed. She came in and surprised me with a BJ out of nowhere. Afterwards I was still in the mood so I started touching her. After quite a while of that she hadn’t come but she pulled me on top of her. I fucked her and she told me to cum in her. Done. Afterwards we’re lying there and shes in some kind of mood and asks “do you think I came during any of that?” I say no. Then I say ‘if…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 02:32 PM
1

When I got back from my trip I hadn’t seen / talked to wife in days. The day I got back, after dinner I laid down in bed. She came in and surprised me with a BJ out of nowhere. Afterwards I was still in the mood so I started touching her. After quite a while of that she hadn’t come but she pulled me on top of her. I fucked her and she told me to cum in her. Done. Afterwards we’re lying there and shes in some kind of mood and asks “do you think I came during any of that?” I say no. Then I say ‘if…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 02:32 PM
1

When I got back from my trip I hadn’t seen / talked to wife in days. The day I got back, after dinner I laid down in bed. She came in and surprised me with a BJ out of nowhere. Afterwards I was still in the mood so I started touching her. After quite a while of that she hadn’t come but she pulled me on top of her. I fucked her and she told me to cum in her. Done. Afterwards we’re lying there and shes in some kind of mood and asks “do you think I came during any of that?” I say no. Then I say ‘if…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 02:32 PM
1

When I got back from my trip I hadn’t seen / talked to wife in days. The day I got back, after dinner I laid down in bed. She came in and surprised me with a BJ out of nowhere. Afterwards I was still in the mood so I started touching her. After quite a while of that she hadn’t come but she pulled me on top of her. I fucked her and she told me to cum in her. Done. Afterwards we’re lying there and shes in some kind of mood and asks “do you think I came during any of that?” I say no. Then I say ‘if…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 02:32 PM
1

When I got back from my trip I hadn’t seen / talked to wife in days. The day I got back, after dinner I laid down in bed. She came in and surprised me with a BJ out of nowhere. Afterwards I was still in the mood so I started touching her. After quite a while of that she hadn’t come but she pulled me on top of her. I fucked her and she told me to cum in her. Done. Afterwards we’re lying there and shes in some kind of mood and asks “do you think I came during any of that?” I say no. Then I say ‘if…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 02:31 PM
1

When I got back from my trip I hadn’t seen / talked to wife in days. The day I got back, after dinner I laid down in bed. She came in and surprised me with a BJ out of nowhere. Afterwards I was still in the mood so I started touching her. After quite a while of that she hadn’t come but she pulled me on top of her. I fucked her and she told me to cum in her. Done. Afterwards we’re lying there and shes in some kind of mood and asks “do you think I came during any of that?” I say no. Then I say ‘if…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 02:31 PM
1

Stand by for active sabotaging when she develops a sudden interest in making you cakes, cookies and other high carb goodies This was the data point that first really confirmed to me that the MRP strategy was "working". It was hilarious too.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 02:00 PM
5

You can be dominant in setting the rules. "Your safe word is x." Push to the safeword. Make sure you aftercare. Banish fear in yourself. She will be afraid to safeword. When she does it, praise her for it. Don't apologize for taking her to that point. There's nothing to apologize for being a leader and taking your team to it's boundaries so they can be expanded. Consider banishing "trauma" talk from your mind and your mouth too. It can perpetuate identity and ego investments in each of you that …
/r/MarriedRedPill27/07/21 01:07 PM
19

TG;DR Too gay? Lol.
/r/askMRP26/07/21 03:26 PM
0

Either: a) you're the prize but you're not truly fucking her; b) you're truly fucking her but you're not the prize; or c) you're not the prize and you're not truly fucking her. I know nothing of you but your post and would bet the odds are 95% that the problem is c). OYS to diagnose and treat this shit. Without that, how are you really "trying"? What's the worst that could happen? You become the prize and truly fuck someone else?
/r/askMRP26/07/21 10:42 AM
3

Oh, I still joke etc. I just don't take my own judgements about others very seriously. I don't get enraged or ecstatic about somebody's (or my own) dumbfuckery. A key tenant I hold is that every person is trying their best with what they have to do the best with what they have. Also, I can learn something from anyone. Both of these tenants I got from NLP. Nonjudgmentalism to me is a strategic imperative, not a moral one. When I judge someone, I tend to justify my own shortcomings and simultaneou…
/r/askMRP26/07/21 10:38 AM
1

Agreed with u/sea-tease. MRP where wife knows your moves has got to be hardest mode. But still, you're fixing the man, not his wife or marriage. You're just in the accelerated course now.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/07/21 03:05 AM
2

If she was getting actually fucked by the prize, there would be no complaints. So, something's off. You tell us what it is.
/r/askMRP26/07/21 02:56 AM
3

Beta response to fault: feelings of guilt. Alpha response to fault: fixing what's fixable and NGAF about the rest.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/07/21 04:35 PM
20

Getting your first bearings on frame can be difficult. To give you an example of what it is, remember that feeling you had with a trusted authority figure, like a good parent, who could exert influence on you with the mere sigh, facial expression, or threat of disappointment? Who you went out of the way to impress or to avoid disappointing? Well, then you were "in" that parent's "frame". Their approval or disapproval served as your conscience. Their evaluation of you was your evaluation of yours…
/r/askMRP25/07/21 02:08 AM
1

My wife planned it to be at a restaurant, which was fine but I would have felt better if I had taken the reigns on that. Either way, I paid for the entire bill for the party so I felt good about that. Later in the day I took the lead and brought the whole family to the pool, talked to strangers with upbeat attitude, and out for burgers and I could tell my wife was really enjoying me leading as her energy was different (much better). Going to focus on more areas I can lead by example this week. L…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/21 09:37 PM
1

addiction Who the fuck diagnosed this? You? Fuck that. You just interpret the feeling of horniness as a desire to cum, and take the first exit you see. The man you want to be knows it's really a desire to fuck and does the work to make that happen. Nature's trying to motivate you to become a man who fucks, and you keep wasting all that on your hand. Stop trying to kill the desire and start channeling it into what you want. You're not an addict. You're just unskilled with your desires.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/21 09:28 PM
3

This is all just like your askMrp post. Lots of "maintaining" and "keeping things" where they "are now." Shit's burning down. Cool. You don't have to save it. But you need to think about what you're going to rebuild. Do that here. Share it. Have these dudes test the fuck out of it. You're not getting the most out of OYS.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/21 09:24 PM
2

The sex was enjoyable for me however I noticed that as I got more dominant in bed, her mood changed a bit. She doesn’t quite know what to make of my new behaviors. And I bet you felt a twinge of fear. Push through all of that. Tests may start flowing from it, but keep going. She's asking herself "Is he for real?" Prove it to yourself, not her.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/21 09:22 PM
1

Sure. askMrp has a thread going on related shit too. You might check it out.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/21 08:59 PM
3

You're way up in her frame. Neither her past actions, nor her present response to any confrontation, should be the deciding factor in whether you stay or go. Maybe you want to tempt her to leave just to see how it plays out. That's fine, if it's what you want. But don't turn yourself into a "if she does x, I'll do y." Just be "I'll do x, because I want y, and I'll deal with the risks as they arise."
/r/askMRP23/07/21 08:56 PM
4

So, true. Expecting truth would be the worst reason to confront her. But there are other reasons you might do it.
/r/askMRP23/07/21 08:53 PM
2

FWIW, actually thinking about my wife with other mean really helped me get over my oneitis and ego investment in "not being with a woman who cheated on me." But, as I said above, I was a bit of a sadist about leaning into this fear.
/r/askMRP23/07/21 07:40 PM
4

This is the best advice on this thread, I think. The now is all that matters.
/r/askMRP23/07/21 07:37 PM
7

I was one of the sadists who leaned into suspicions of affairs. I even wrote out a long and detailed case for it. I utterly convinced myself that she did have one. I then STFU and owned my shit for about 3 months and got my go plan all lined-up. I then realized that I didn't want to nuke it all, but was still willing to. So, I chose to present the case and simply accept how she responded. She denied it, but admitted to being tempted. Fine with me: I'd've cheated on me. So good on her for holding…
/r/askMRP23/07/21 07:34 PM
1

OYS 9 Started learning and implementing MRP/sidebar/etc. in July 2020. late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 166 lbs. 14% navy phul: last worksets: BP 155x20 BS 185x20 DL 265x9 Posting late after Rule 11 ban because I petted a tard without paying attention to it not being in the tard sub. We are nothing without our standards. SHIT TO OWN ... GENERAL FRAME/MENTALITY Had a generally lower energy this week than I have for a while. Previously, a downturn in energy would've also caused a dow…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/21 04:51 PM
3

If you truly decide any affair doesn't matter, then it doesn't. You can make a good wife out of one who had an affair. And no woman is incapable of having an affair, even after being made a good wife. It's always just your turn. So, if you have true acceptance of it, and true outcome independence going forward, you needn't carry it on your journey anymore. If you want to set it as a boundary in the future with a go plan all lined- up, by all means do so. But if you're not man enough to accept it…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/21 02:03 PM
1

Consider learning about gaming men. 48 Laws of Power. You can win frame contests with your opponent doing all the work.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/21 01:50 PM
1

A gauntlet of shit has been dropped in front of you and you have the skills and vision to clean it up and get all these people rowing in the way you want. Carry on.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/21 01:21 PM
4

Everything you say here (and probably think wherever you are) is negative and focused on the past. Even your most future-oriented statements go like this: I should continue [fixing the past] I need to stop [doing things I used to do in the past] This is why it's all a LARP to you. You don't see that your future is yours. You see it as a reaction to her, to us, and probably others. Start making plans just for you, accepting that we, her, and anyone else may fucking hate you. Live for your future …
/r/askMRP22/07/21 08:19 PM
2

What is your opportunity here? What are you going to do?
/r/askMRP22/07/21 06:07 PM
2

You quoted the portion of my reply to you that is the least relevant or helpful to you now that you've already made this error and are in this position. Wake up.
/r/askMRP22/07/21 05:17 PM
13

Never been in your spot. But I'd guess that since she's had an enormous confirmation that your LARPing is well and truly a LARP she'll either a) test the ever-motherfucking-shit out of you, if she's at all interested in staying or b) lose all respect for you and leave or suck your beta bucks dry. Question for you, though: Regardless of which way she takes it, what are you going to do? (So far your answer is to confirm to her you're not the prize and ask internet strangers for next steps.) At dre…
/r/askMRP22/07/21 04:32 PM
5

Scared me too. Even more when I thought it was fucking with my head. Truth is many of the dudes there are or once were "guys like you" looking to push past this exact fear. And most found MRP looking for better sex, just "like you." So, you came here with a question ("Why can't I make my wife cum?") and MRP got you to your own answer ("I'm scared."), which is probably what your wife smells on you (we certainly could). Yes, MRP is that good.
/r/askMRP21/07/21 06:34 PM
5

Read everything u/hornsofapathy has ever posted. Get your ass into OYS. Stop fucking around here on the tard sub.
/r/askMRP21/07/21 03:44 PM
7

Jesus. Read The Rational Male and the rest of the sidebar while you're at it, including Practical Female Psychology. You are clueless.
/r/askMRP21/07/21 01:31 PM
3

Read the fucking books.
/r/askMRP21/07/21 01:15 PM
6

I don't believe that "Woman is not fully sexually satisfied at home" is inevitably followed by "Woman seeks sex outside of marriage". Then no one can help you. If she ever meets me, she'll see in my eyes what she doesn't see in yours - that I know she has a deep need to be well and truly fucked and that I know how to do it. So, tell us all some more about your beliefs.
/r/askMRP21/07/21 01:06 PM
6

I fucking already have.
/r/askMRP21/07/21 01:04 PM
4

She still has to learn it at some point. Jesus. You're really living up to that handle. It's not a learned behavior. It's a physiological response to physical and psychological stimulus, which in this case you're not providing. There's nothing flawed with either of you. You're just unskilled at sex and she's following your lead. Get better at sex psychologically and physically. I notice your response elides the parts of my reply that suggest she's going elsewhere for primal satisfaction. Check y…
/r/askMRP21/07/21 12:53 PM
11

She can't orgasm with you. I bet she masturbates and hides it from you. Or maybe she has a fuck buddy. It's very unlikely you got one who just can't orgasm. And there's no amount of "understanding" that ever made any woman cum. What's this say about you? You probably are unattractive (physically and behaviorally). Maybe you're a judgemental simp she cannot trust to reveal her inner slut to. Maybe you're boring at sex. Maybe you're so needy with sex (and for her to cum) the thought of sex with yo…
/r/askMRP21/07/21 12:14 PM
7

they can never be satisfied Confirmed. So fucking what? if there's a flaw in my frame or actions No flaw. You're just unskilled. Improve your skills. Can't believe I'm going to do this to an admitted autist on the tard sub, but here goes: dabble with WOTSM. See the feminine for what it is - an insatiable, perpetual adventure and challenge. Love this about women and you will never want any of them to ever be satisfied. The challenge is a tool you can use to grow, if you will only use it as such.
/r/askMRP20/07/21 03:32 PM
4

Show me the hottest chick in the world, and I'll show you a dude who is tired of fucking her. Live for more.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/07/21 08:40 PM
1

If she's maybe, I'm no. I only accept fuck yeah.
/r/askMRP19/07/21 08:15 PM
19

Had similar dynamic a year ago. Took a while to overcome. Some stuff that I tried and think helped: - After rejection, verbalize something like "Cool. Whenever." - Initiate the morning after any rejection. - Smile and wink at all rejections; banish anger from yourself. - Game for gaming sake early and often; enjoy a day where you gamed all day without ever really expecting sex at night. - Read Nancy Friday's books to remind yourself that this frigid woman next to you really and truly wants what …
/r/askMRP19/07/21 05:49 PM
8

You probably underestimate how unattractive a needy conversation like this is. It's sand in the vagina.
/r/askMRP17/07/21 09:58 PM
2

It briefly helped me to remember "she really wants you to pass this". I say briefly, because it's obviously still in her frame and seems like getting permission to pass. Once you are all the way out of her frame, the tests are easy and fun. When she's in your frame, you can test her with the hamster.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/07/21 01:28 PM
2

spinning my wheels I can relate. Breakthrough on frame for me was to see it's something I do, not something I have. Better, it's really how I do things (with curiosity, playfulness, etc.). It's not identity as much as it is persepective.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/21 08:50 PM
3

Your solution is to fixate on the problem. Common approach that commonly fails. Why do you *like* something that is unuseful to you? Giving in to a habit of thought because of how it feels seems like a frame issue to me.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/21 08:04 PM
1

I wouldn't bet against yourself. I made this transition pretty quickly from where you seem to be. There was no magic step; I just consciously started thinking differently. So, what's the obstacle? How do you overcome it?
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/21 07:11 PM
1

So what's your strategy to replace anger with something more useful?
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/21 05:31 PM
1

So just double the kgs, and you've ballparked lbs. No biggie.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/21 12:28 PM
2

My LTR mentioned that she appreciates the structure I give to her life, that we have turned a corner and is excited about the future. To me, any turning of any corner was really just me realizing I had become a drunk captain, and then starting to own my shit and retaking the reins. There is no corner, and she has already forgotten these words. The other aspects of femine energy will manifest in myriad ways. Nothing is ever finished. Embrace the continuing challenge and growth in this more than t…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/21 09:09 AM
2

I can see why some guys end up throwing the pill back up. An incident with my wife this week had me wanting to go full beta like I have always done in the past. I had to remind myself why I am doing this. It was difficult to stifle my need to sacrifice myself to ease her pain and worry. I held strong but looking back I think I could've been stronger. ... This is when my Captain save a ho complex tried to kick in. Seeing her so upset and distraught made me want to be a martyr and give up everythi…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/21 08:56 AM
1

I didn't initiate as much as I had intended before the trip but that was because I really wasn't up to it with the ear infection. Still, I got offered a sex act when I joined her in the shower after our Thursday afternoon workout. I had intended to use that time as just a "hey, we can shower together and I'm not needy about sex with you just because we're naked time." Instead, she initiated, and I took advantage of the situation. And later in the weekend, I got willing, vanilla but intimate sex …
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/21 08:47 AM
4

There is nothing fundamentally flawed with you. Not knowing who you are just means opportunity to learn. Perhaps you spend a lifetime learning more and more, never stopping and fully "knowing yourself." This curiousity is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself. You have yourself with you your whole life. If you can love yourself genuinely (with honest critique, authentic appreciation, and healthy challenge), yourself provides you a kind of mental and spiritual squat rack you always have…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/21 08:31 AM
3

Not really. Being your own mental point of origin is not about "not doing", it's about doing the right things. Your mind can't deal with negatives. It always fixates on whatever is being negated or prohibited. I tell you not to think of purple unicorns and you do it anyway. You do this to yourself too. The only way to stop doing something is to displace it with something better to do. So, she's in your head. Cool. Don't bar her out, or try to. Rather, work on finding ways of converting that trig…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/21 10:22 PM
1

A welcome reminder. Thanks
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/21 10:14 PM
2

Your bad shit was bad. No saving grace there. She doesn't owe you pussy. She doesn't owe you, pussy. She does own you, pussy. And it's all because you let her, in your head. Who else can free your mind other than you? Get to it.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/21 08:00 PM
2

Yep. If you're just reacting, you're following someone else's script (in their frame), but if you're acting, you're writing the scripts.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/21 05:19 PM
2

I will conduct a simple experiment inspired by NMMNG for the coming week with my wife: (1) treat her perfect according to my standards (2) expect NOTHING in return, and (3) look forward to negative reactions from her and counter it with something positive like I would “if I were extremely high on drugs and did not react to reality, but just express my positive feelings no matter what”. Sounds like it will be a LARP, but don't let that stop you. If you really care more about the growth than what …
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/21 04:46 PM
2

Furthermore, I’m beginning to realize it’s probably me, in fact, that causes these swings in the first place. I’d like to explore the thought a bit more, but even if I control my actions, I’m guessing the irrational nature of women wouldn’t cause a predictable reaction. Also, it makes me ask myself the question, do I care what reaction I get from my actions? Push further here. You're so close. You absolutely can influence the swings, but the influence absolutely is unpredictable. Your confidence…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/21 04:43 PM
3

Just start STFU without attachments to outcomes. Slow the fuck down. Just don't talk or type for a bit.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/21 02:57 PM
1

OYS 8 Started learning and implementing MRP/sidebar/etc. in July 2020. late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 165.5 lbs. 13% navy phul: last worksets: BP 155x11 BS 185x15 DL 250x20 SHIT TO OWN ... GENERAL FRAME/MENTALITY Coming off an extremely busy week. Had a five-day work/pleasure trip while workload and demands escalated dramatically. I focused on fun for the week and got agile at delegating and adjusting so as to preserve time and presence for the socializing and activities on the t…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/21 02:54 PM
1

Yes. It's called a covert contract. See these "points" all the time. Look, dude. Your problem is interior. STFU. Lift. Sidebar. There are no substitutes. If you really want a quiet mind, do these fucking things over and over again. You don't like what you see in yourself. Maybe she's a submissive woman following her leader now - also not liking what you see in yourself. How do you lead both of you out of that? You have to learn how to like what you see in yourself. First, you have to like the sh…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/21 01:40 PM
3

I guess if I had to deal with all the shitty things you tell yourself about yourself, then I wouldn't want to be silent in your head either. Look for yourself: I cant seem to STFU I’m so needy and I just want to keep the conversation going. When we stop talking the emptiness kills me. Im dying right now because she is ghosting me and I realise that i’m a bitch, but I cant get the shit feeling out of my chest. when I get home tonight i will ... be a shit husband because thats the kind that she de…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/21 01:15 PM
2

I watched a youtube documentary about a man living with his wife in the countryside. Small house. Rather big land surrounding the house. Beautiful nature. They had daughter that was just born. And he was just owning it. I felt very inspired. I had a strong feeling of 'thats where I want to be' or 'that seems so meaningful'. To have a cozy house with a huge garden. An hour drive to work/the next big city. Silence at night. Nature all around you. Motorcycle in the garage. Commute some days of the …
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/21 12:53 PM
3

How often has reasoned argument won you anything with a woman? You need to fuck, but a needy man can't really fuck. STFU. Give only one fuck.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/21 12:34 PM
3

Did you have, or are you at, a main event? If so, you need only speak your wants. Have you done that?
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/21 12:29 PM
2

Really scrutinize what, if anything, anger adds to your life. If you channel it into something, great. If not, time to start considering whether to regard it as irrelevant and ineffective. Look into what happens to your brain, pulse, and hormones when angry. See how it physically pulls you out of frame. Ask yourself if that is at all effective at what you're trying to achieve. It sometimes is, but that's seldom, I bet.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/07/21 07:27 PM
3

She wanted you to find it, but needs plausible deniability because she's afraid you - like the rest of the Madonna-whore world - are a defensive judgmental simp. But you're not; you're a man who fucks. And the mere prospect of that has got her really fucking wet. Go get it!
/r/MarriedRedPill07/07/21 02:25 PM
3

The vibe is good. Means you have an eager first mate wanting to be led away from Madonna-whore in the worst way. She probably bought it to test you and you're failing to show that you are really a man who fucks. A man who fucks isn't jealous of a vibe because he brings irreplaceable immersion, emotion, and dominance to sex. Your woman and her vibe can't replicate that. Put the vibe in service of your desires, not at odds with them. Fuck her while using it on her. Try it right on her asshole. Mak…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/07/21 09:24 AM
7

being my own arbiter and be confident that I’m on the right path. I've found success in dropping the question of "right" path and going straight to "is this the path I want." I also have stopped judging paths by their destinations, judging them by their foreseeable waypoints instead, since I know the future me (provided I invest in and nurture him with healthy challenge) will be a better chooser of destinations than I am now.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/07/21 12:35 AM
3

Her expectations don't matter, nor does an admission of guilt. The only thing that matters is fixing it.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/07/21 08:02 PM
4

Honestly, I don't know how you escaped Rule 9 this week. There's so much about her wants and mindset with little relevance to how you're leading. Almost like you're looking to her mindset for validation of your efforts. I get noting it as feedback, but are you spending too much time and attention with it?
/r/MarriedRedPill06/07/21 06:49 PM
3

To train my slut, I eventually had to show - with congruence - that a) I was sluttier than she, b) I could work with anything she wanted to bring to sex (except lack of enthusiasm, which I didn't accept), and c) that I wasn't LARPing. To unfuck myself and get there, I had to read Nancy Friday's books just to convince myself that women really do want the type of fucking I want to give. It was a hack. I suppose a real alpha wouldn't need that step. But I did and it worked.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/07/21 04:37 PM
6

Pathologizing it an as addiction and talking about the "devil" and "wrappers" are all feints so you don't have to admit that it was your own shitty decision-making. You exhibit tendencies of doing this in other areas too. Repeatedly doing this habituates you into generally viewing yourself as an impotent object, rather than a potent man. Decisions got you here; decisions will get you out.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/07/21 04:25 PM
1

Jesus. How much shit do you have your wife owning in this? When will you own it? Nobody controls what goes in or out of your fat fucking mouth but you.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/07/21 04:00 PM
2

She doesn't know what she wants. She's chasing her tail. And you are too. Do what you want. If she's worth keeping, and you're worth following, she'll chase you. But you have to be in front to do that.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/07/21 03:33 PM
1

Who, other than your shitty self, diagnosed you as "addicted" to masturbation? Maybe give yourself a better second opinion and liberate yourself from the "addiction." You'll certainly find it more satisfying when you do it. Don't be surprised if you end up doing it only seldomly because you prefer wet pussy to wimpy palm.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/07/21 03:02 PM
5

OYS 7 Started learning and implementing MRP/sidebar/etc. in July 2020. late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 167.5 lbs. 14% navy phul: last worksets: BP 155x9 BS 185x15 DL 250x20 SHIT TO OWN ... LIFTING/FITNESS I did all planned lifts and cardio, but didn't do any yoga. I still feel good and mobile, but I am probably playing with fire the longer I go without spending time on yoga for mobility. Should do Did it today. For the last week I haven't had anything at all to eat until I have ea…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/07/21 02:40 PM
1

Exactly. That's why I said "check" but didn't say "change" your approach. I used to be an impulsive over-corrector at the first hint of negative feedback and am trying to unlearn replace that deeply-ingrained habit with one of curiosity and discipline. Getting better at it.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/07/21 01:48 AM
1

Frame didn't start "clicking" for me until I understood it's something I actively exert or exude (although often easily and with little conscious, like posture) rather than something I merely passively posses (like muscle tone). Your scripts are awesome cues to firing it up, or better, "boosting" it, since it really never should be powered down. I've read other dudes who use door frames as cues like that.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/07/21 10:48 PM
1

100%. It's all feedback. Positive means keep going and or double down. Negative means check your approach. Failure is useful. There is more taught from failure than from success. So, I welcome it when I find it.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/07/21 06:33 PM
1

Really good fucking points.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/07/21 03:53 PM
1

This is pretty obvious to me, but I like the opportunity of having to write it. Any action repeated tends to becoming habit. The more repition, the more the habit. The mind and the body adapt to the habit. If the habit is "bad", the adaptation is negative growth. If "good*, positive. What differentiates "bad" from "good"? I do. In fact, this skill of habituating action which results in the mind and body that I desire for myself is what I think the key to "unfucking" is, at least for now. This is…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/07/21 02:27 PM
1

Growth is the given. But growth can be negative or positive. Something like intent or direction is needed to choose where to channel it. You can try to chanbel the growth of one aspect yourself (e.g., capacity for work) and unintentionally encourage growth another part (e.g., ego). So, careful and sober observation is required to channel it and adjust. It's also necessary to consider that now, having grown, you can do more than was possible before that growth. The compounding effect of growth is…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/07/21 04:02 PM
1

Is there growth in your model?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/21 09:19 PM
1

I know you don't care, but I like you or at least I think I do. At first, I thought you were some misanthropic troll swatting away what isn't familiar to you. But I see that you engage on what's important. Even if we have different perspectives, I like what you seem to be up to. You're trying to play with words without a full grasp of what they mean. I have to call bullshit on this. We both know that when people say "we're all flawed," they mean what I understand by it - that we're fundamentally…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/07/21 01:34 AM
1

Trading notes. Thanks for the frame tests.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/06/21 09:59 PM
1

Look man, I get it. I don't think I'm coming across to you. See my response to Horns. Maybe that'll help. You're trying to figure shit out, navigate this pathetic place you've found yourself. Maybe you saw an image of someone else and think, "That's what I want". So, you go after it. Not at all. I love my life. It was pathetic when I got here a year ago, but it's dope AF now. And I'm better at living it. And the thing I like most about it is that it's mine - me working it out myself, taking tips…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/06/21 09:44 PM
1

I'm not parroting your points, u/HornsOfApathy; I'm explaining what I've learned in developing them. I understand "flawed" to mean a fundamental defect that prevents a thing from actualizing its potential. Thinking of myself and everyone else as fundamentally defective or "flawed" is too grossly general, vague, and frankly ego-projectingly judgmental, to be at all useful. And if it's an unuseful thought, what's it doing in my mind? Better to recognize that I, as my own judge, write the rules as …
/r/MarriedRedPill30/06/21 06:56 PM
-2

Maybe one day you'll see what I mean. Maybe not. Up to you.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/06/21 01:49 PM
3

Yes. Read your own OYSes and identify the way you unjustifiably frame undesired circumstances and states as necessary limitations. Then reframe them.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/06/21 12:31 PM
1

What the fuck does this even mean? It means I can't blame some shortcoming on "my nature" or characteristics etc. If I'm not pleased with myself, I simply need to change what I'm doing. The mental model of "I'm flawed or broken and therefore must do or not do x, y, or z" is fucked. I'm not broken; I just haven't learned and optimized enough yet. Some guys pathologize their egos into fundamental flaws, thereby committing themselves to maintaining the belief that they are broken. u/hornsofapathy h…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/06/21 12:04 PM
2

I’ve become aware that I am by my nature currently act like a very emotionally needy person. Unjustified and limiting identity investment.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/06/21 09:17 AM
2

Sad is dead weight that should be dropped.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/06/21 09:06 AM
-1

OYS 6 Started learning and implementing MRP/sidebar/etc. July 2020. late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 164 lbs. 13% navy phul: last worksets: BP 135x12 BS 185x13 DL 250x15 SHIT TO OWN ... LIFTING/FITNESS Still close to lowest bodyfat in over two decades, but at another low energy point. Had to deload bench just to keep in rep range. Missed one of four lifting days two weeks straight. This is not what I want for myself. I'm struggling to choke down my protein macro quota. Eating chick…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/06/21 07:05 PM
3

Commitment isn't scary when you trust yourself knowing that you can change your mind later. If she wants to be your only woman, is she prepared to be every woman for you? Has she demonstrated that capacity? Better lead her there. Start by genuinely expecting that of her. The prize ain't free.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/06/21 12:23 PM
3

OYS 4 & 5 Started learning and implementing MRP/sidebar/etc. July 2020. late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 164 lbs. 13% navy phul: last worksets: BP 155x12 BS 185x13 DL 250x15 SHIT TO OWN ... READING/OYS W&S banned me 2 weeks ago for being a dick to a dude who commented on my OYS rather than engage with what I was trying to do on the point commented on. I thought the dude's comment was lazy and bitchy and still do, but that doesn't mean I should react to it - especially if it means n…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/06/21 06:48 PM
1

Not sure what you're after, but I think we both have better things to do.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/06/21 08:43 PM
1

Almost responded, but I read in your OYS that you admit you're socially inept, which probably explains why you're unable to comprehend what I was doing here.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/06/21 06:56 PM
3

I spoke to a guy who is in great shape and in his late 50s. He said he got on TRT 7 years ago and never looked back. He has a guy and gets T cheap and could hook me up. I told him I was interested but have not really committed. He tells me I could do a 12 week cycle without any long-term issues just to see how it feels. Told me he has friends that do one cycle a year, 12 or 18 weeks, just to maintain good muscle mass and some leanness. I had previously read that once you go on gear, you have to …
/r/MarriedRedPill08/06/21 03:59 PM
1

OYS 3 Started learning and implementing MRP/sidebar/etc. July 2020. late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 166 lbs. 16% navy phul: last worksets: BP 155x9 BS 185x16 DL 250x16 SHIT TO OWN ... GENERAL FRAME/MENTALITY Week before last, I had been reflecting on my desire to quit OYS. It came from my recognition that it tempts me to bullshit for external validation. u/weakandsensitive and u/hornsofapathy advised me last week to lean into this awareness and see where it goes. So, I did. During…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/06/21 03:14 PM
1

guys who know more about this than you Yep. It's why I'm investing time and attention here.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/06/21 11:21 AM
1

separate out the important parts I'm hunting for benefits and advantages.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/06/21 11:20 AM
1

OYS 2 Started learning and implementing MRP/sidebar/etc. July 2020. late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 167 lbs. 16% navy phul: last worksets: BP 150x12 BS 185x12 DL 250x12 SHIT TO OWN ... GENERAL FRAME/MENTALITY A comment on last week's OYS was that I was mentally limiting myself (in context of energy/lifting/fitness). It was obvious, but I was ignoring or avoiding that. It helped rouse me and get my ass up and to work. Prior to that comment, I had already gone two days not doing wha…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/06/21 02:55 PM
1

So fucking right. I hate my old habits of limited thinking and am regressing back to them. Thanks
/r/MarriedRedPill27/05/21 04:02 PM
3

OYS 1 late 30s 5'8" | married 15y+ | multiple kids | 165 lbs. 16% navy phul: last worksets: BP 150x9 BS 185x9 DL 250x9 BACKGROUND "Took red pill" a year ago. Restarting OYS for the third time. I've quit posting here in the past because I've felt that I get too engrossed in MRP/OYS and waste time. But really, since about a year ago, when I started reading RP and MRP books/sidebar/posts and watching youtube content on all of it, I have dramatically improved my life and my control over it. So, the …
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/21 12:28 PM
2

One thing to own though is that I'm not very fun. I have blamed my wife for lack of good conversation, since she rarely brings up discussion and responds to me with short answers and is the one who seems to want it so much. Are you sufficiently curious about whatever you're doing to take genuine interest and thus be interesting? Do you model good conversationalism for those you lead (wife included)?
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/21 03:58 PM
4

I'd bet your comfort's probably still coming off as needy. Be OI with it (as you would with a sexual initiation). Offer it, but don't care if it gets rejected. Be patient; you have to overwrite a history of unattractive neediness.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/21 03:43 PM
2

Anger is useless. Lying is defensive an unattractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/21 09:40 AM
2

All the more imperative to master stress.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/21 09:37 AM
13

I have no clue if women have mission. Mine is the only one I know, and it doesn't matter if someone supports it or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/21 01:17 AM
3

No time for others' scripts or anyone's regrets.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/21 08:16 AM
2

Any man thinking he's entitled to being fucked is probably ego tripping and not getting fucked as much or as good as the man who doesn't use entitlement thinking. Entitlement thinking usually is an excuse for a personal failure and tends to perpetuate itself (and the failure).
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/21 07:46 AM
4

For his perspectives applied in LTR, see r/marriedredpill
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/21 07:39 AM
2

I use magnesium to prevent my migraines. And I drink a 5 hour energy if I see an aura (which usually precedes onset by a couple of hours). I used to get a dozen or so a year. Only about twice a year now. Sorry, bro. Those things are legit incapacitating.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/03/21 12:36 AM
3

Occasionally the lightly-held hypothesis, but never anything stronger than that.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/21 09:10 AM
5

These men are lost because the generations before them didn't model how to creatively engineer value to add, and because these lost men don't see much value in doing all the work to learn that themselves. Women entering the workforce only exposed a weakness which already existed.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/21 12:56 AM
2

Why anger? What use is it?
/r/MarriedRedPill18/03/21 01:21 AM
2

Check out Nancy Friday's My Secret Garden and Women on Top for various plausible hypotheses on this.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/21 09:38 AM
2

Does this mean men hide less?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/21 09:34 AM
3

Maybe give it a try?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/21 12:05 AM
7

Might be the red pill book.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/21 11:33 PM
7

If you've not read The Rational Male book series, you likely will enjoy it.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/21 11:29 PM
2

Your turn to be a branch?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/21 11:13 PM
–

If it's useful feedback, why not examine it? If it's bitterness spewing from a resentful or limited mind, why pay it any attention at all?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/21 05:33 PM
4

If I genuinely like and desire what I have, what is the utility of asking whether it is something someone else wants?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/21 05:28 PM
1

Transformer's Prime and DinoTrux (both on Netflix). Kids (boys and gir;s, ages 4 - 12) love them. Lots in each about using masculinity.
/r/RedPillWives26/02/21 08:35 PM
1

Is it that having most men be unattractive is beneficial to most women and the few attractive men who figure it out? (BTW, my son's getting this lesson for sure.)
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/21 08:28 PM
1

This is helpful.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/02/21 01:34 PM
0

Can you control your fears without OI? Do you really need a sequence? How do you know what you assume to be real here? Why can you not simply act?
/r/MarriedRedPill24/02/21 02:51 AM
0

This has lead to untapped potential in my life. It drives procrastination, it drives perfectionism issues. I cannot do OI either because of this. Is this cause-and-effect belief real or useful?
/r/MarriedRedPill24/02/21 02:15 AM
5

Why would anyone ask this question of him- or herself?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/21 11:00 PM
1

Who's responding?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 08:40 PM
1

You can't act on curiosity?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 08:37 PM
1

If I was "not just some super-needy validation-seeking bitch," why would I be here? How about we fuck now?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 08:25 PM
1

That's your best guess?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 08:21 PM
1

Meaningless? Why? Because you don't understand what it does? What does that mean to you?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 08:20 PM
0

Had I been continuously acting congruent with my professional mission all along, there would be no stress related to this because I would have a replacement already on board or waiting in the wings. Have you been living in my head all week?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 05:32 PM
1

The parallel with my life is that my wife bounces between these states, and while I'm not looking to nuke and move on, the concept is the same. Doesn't it feel kind of like a milestone when you realize you've wrongly perceived your woman as a sort of fixed personality while you're swinging extremes and the roles are actually reversed?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 05:30 PM
1

Many of our interactions are like a comedy sketch that goes on too long after the punchline and gets precipitously less amusing with each passing second. To change it up, have you tried a "Okay. How about we fuck now?"
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 05:24 PM
1

4 5' 8" b. ’82 m. '05 several kids 165 lbs. 16% navy Bench 5x5x165 squat 5x5x230 dead 3x5x285 ​ A week of reminders of the harm of my own complacency. I'm "stuck" on my work. I'm intentionally keeping my head down and not shaking the trees for servicing work because I'm trying to change my priorities and process to develop work for others to service, but I'm chasing my tail on that. I burned a week doing that and don't have anything to show for it. I hamster that into a mild panic, giving my inn…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 05:13 PM
1

You need me to help you help me?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 03:09 PM
0

Does looking at "rejection" as feedback help make it less intimidating and more useful?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 02:27 PM
-2

At the end of the day I volunteered to take care of the assignment and that makes the situation my fault, regardless of the outcome. If you can volunteer for the assignment with detachment, would it be useful to volunteer for receiving feedback for the rejection with detachment?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 01:42 PM
1

We are under very tight deadlines this year and my team is showing no sense of urgency. I need to set clear priorities and expectations for my team to hold them accountable. Is there a motivation they should have that you can, but are not, modeling for them? Have you presented a frame that's energizing and motivating? Do you understand why people are not responding to your leadership in the way you desire?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 01:40 PM
3

Been less obsessive about sex this week Does your OYS reflect less obsessiveness about sex?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 01:34 PM
0

The goal that brought me to MRP was, of course, wanting a better marriage but outside of that I’m still not really sure what I want to achieve or what my goals should be. Does MRP fix marriages? What does it fix?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 01:32 PM
-1

Who am I I am a man who ____.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 01:28 PM
2

I feel like I've "found" myself. I don't know if there's anything else to find in my age. Is a growing thing ever fully found? If you fully found yourself, did you stop growing?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/21 01:10 PM
7

Do you like yourself? Do you even know yourself? Are you interested enough in yourself to find yourself interesting? If so, do you really need anything more?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/21 04:17 AM
0

Did your parents model marriage for you well? What would your actually mom loving your dad look like? How do you know? Is a 50% success rate good enough if there's sufficient upside? Are challenging things worth doing? Aren't there potentially catastrophic consequences for many other undertakings in which you engage? All women marry for money?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/21 03:55 AM
0

I remember, and appreciate, you posting this. Definitely related. The overlap and differences are interesting.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/21 02:28 AM
3

which is totally instinctive, subconcious and biologically controlled Is it this belief which limits your ability to understand what a person is doing when they say they change their standard?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/21 08:52 PM
1

Doesn't it help with understanding that their hamster is a conditioned response in the same way beta-ing is? Doesn't that help it make the dynamics a bit more inviting - like a challenge or game - and a bit less intimidating?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/02/21 08:27 PM
1

Definitely a Hail Mary.
/r/RedPillWives22/02/21 08:13 PM
1

None of this is manipulation. It's how a woman's mind works. u/DrBeaufort, doesn't Nancy Friday's book actually confirm what u/good_looking_man is saying here for you at some level?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/02/21 07:29 PM
1

+1 for u/man_in_the_world's gloss here. Nancy Friday's books do, despite occasional "nth wave" feminism tangents, largely confirm RP suppositions and theory, and can be helpful for internalizing the reality of the unplugged world. But, u/DrBeaufort, as u/man_in_the_world is pointing out here (and what is only implied in Nancy Friday's books), is this an opportunity for you to lead and model, rather than cajole, coax, or negotiate? Can you take someone somewhere you've never been?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/02/21 07:25 PM
1

Is emotional stability something he can model for you? If not, should he consider r/marriedredpill?
/r/RedPillWives22/02/21 07:06 PM
0

All women?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/21 08:16 PM
0

Have I given advice? Do you always feel hostility when your CMV is responded-to with questions asking you to further examine your own thinking?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/21 07:35 PM
1

And yet, does it simultaneously make it easier to standout as authentic? Interesting take and paradox.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/21 05:24 PM
1

Or is it rather than men should not let someone's label of "toxic" stunt their flourishing into their full potential, whatever that may be?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/21 05:21 PM
14

Is OP's post self-proving?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/21 05:19 PM
2

Could it be that some are looking to pair with someone who merely accepts them for who they are, while others are looking for someone who will challenge them to grow? Is the moralistic binary assumed by OP too simple?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/21 05:17 PM
1

Is complacency a good strategy at anything worthwhile, relationships included?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/21 04:18 PM
1

Do you think persistence and pursuit is only expressed in "toughness"? Don't you prove things to yourself?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/21 04:17 PM
3

Someone who can see themselves loving you isn’t going to make you feel unworthy, unsupported or undesired. If you feel those things, you’re with a manipulative user, who isn’t really into you and you should eject immediately. She's to blame for your feelings? You were born with, and have maintained, perfectly accurate and mature feelings? What if her treatment of you is reflective of how you make her feel? Is solipsism working for you?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/21 12:53 AM
0

Compatible with who you are now, or with what you might become with challenge?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/21 12:38 AM
2

Do you always fold at the first hint of resistance?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/21 12:26 AM
1

I seem to accept that we can’t be too hard on ourselves, which might be an excuse. Is precision and decisiveness in self-critique being "too hard"? Is ambiguity and indecision useful in self-critique?
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/21 02:49 AM
2

frankly childish, even robotic and unemotional. If this is your idea of what vetting is, is it any surprise you see no value in it? Is it possible that there are good vetters who do it better than you envision?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/21 08:21 PM
2

but I can't help but think sometimes that the clock is ticking What did you mean by this? ​ called me out for validation-seekinig through sex. Isn't it amazing how they are naturally equipped to see this in us when it's so hard for us to see it?
/r/MarriedRedPill17/02/21 08:14 PM
2

Why so many words? What really matters? Does a value system really matter? Are you more than a value system? What is the difference between value systems and mental modeling?
/r/MarriedRedPill17/02/21 08:01 PM
2

Incredible how much really hasn’t changed over the past 5 years. There really shouldn’t be any excuses, but at the same time, we are all going through this at our own timeframe. Are you really accepting the feedback that part of your mind is trying to identify here? Why is another part seemingly rejecting it? Are you improving or aren't you?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/21 08:21 PM
1

I’d wait until my marriage was stronger to get the operation since I’d feel more confident that we’re in it for the long haul. Would you hand your balls to a man who lets the strength of his marriage tell him what to do with them? Whose hands are these balls really in? Are the reasons for your decisions as (or perhaps even more) important than what you decide? Are we really talking about vasectomies?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/21 05:17 PM
2

It's far more fulfilling to catch a particular fish you want to eat tonight than it is to have the "catch of the day," isn't it?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/21 04:51 PM
3

Lots of problem solving to do this passed week. Isn't the problem-solving fun? ​ It was an opportunity to problem solve and lead from the front but a lot of the bullshit could have been prevented if I had prepared better for the trip. Wouldn't preventing the problems prevent the fun in solving them? ​ When I am making a decision I often am catching a bunch of attitude and she just completely refuses what I’m trying to do. Is this perhaps another problem to have fun solving?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/21 04:09 PM
2

3 5' 8" b. ’82 m. '05 several kids 163 lbs. 15% navy Bench 5x5x173 squat 5x5x230 dead 3x5x301 Resumed lifting this week after 2-week recovery. Feels fantastic. Time off was recuperative, but I got lazy and I feel fat. Maybe a bit of dysmorphia, but still feeling fat. Maybe I'm a chick. V-Day was fun. No sex wanted, none required. Gamed wife incessantly. Gamed a checkout girl at the butcher, who dirty talked me the entire checkout. I'm sure she does it to dudes all the time. How nice of her. No m…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/21 04:03 PM
1

I do believe that all the things I'm doing are more important than going out right now, but it does feel like I'm not progressing well. Does this mean you don't believe you're more important than the things you're doing?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/21 03:50 PM
1

Will it be a challenge to establish rapport and elicit investment with your abundance mindset when so many investors you encounter are motivated by scarcity?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/21 03:48 PM
1

Which side of you do you choose?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/21 03:43 PM
2

Is making a potentially permanent decision for the purpose of avoiding increased responsibility the right mindset? Or is this decision (either way) in pursuit of a positive outcome (i.e., in furtherance of something, rather than avoidance of another)? Will answering that question resolve the indecision?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/21 01:07 AM
1

Is there gain from not risking?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 11:09 PM
1

Who is immune to culture? Is it the errand here that's making the fool, or is it the other way around? Does the loosing the gamble make the fool a fool, or is it the fool's refusal to gain from even a loss?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 10:53 PM
1

What has that to do with how you choose? When is anything too late? Too late for what?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 10:21 PM
1

Welp, the only way to bust through this mess should be to not give the impression of being a loser in the first place. And so fucking what if people who see me as a loser also see me as a tryhard, really. Can people see how you see yourself? If it turns out they can, what will you do?
/r/MarriedRedPill15/02/21 09:40 PM
1

Making sure she feels safe with me in any decision she makes regarding this situation. It’s been a long while since I read it but, but I know that TWOTSM touches on this somewhat, making sure your woman feels loved and free in any decision she makes, so I will revisit this. But did you understand TWOTSM? Will she feel safe with your hamster outpacing hers?
/r/MarriedRedPill15/02/21 09:38 PM
1

Wouldn't you really be the Buddha if you both could abstain from sex and enjoy gaming? Are the difficulties you're encountering maybe good for you?
/r/MarriedRedPill15/02/21 09:33 PM
1

Is it possible you're already having fun, but embarrassed to admit it? Is fun a result or is it a cause? Where does fun come from? What, other than a mind, is needed to "have" fun?
/r/MarriedRedPill15/02/21 09:31 PM
1

Will a better you not have "bad sex" now and again? How much will "great sex" make you better? Are you asking yourself the right questions?
/r/MarriedRedPill15/02/21 09:24 PM
1

Feels like the opportunities are just presenting itself and I just need to be less dumb to get what I want. Do you always wait for opportunities to present themselves?
/r/MarriedRedPill15/02/21 09:16 PM
1

I also worry I'll feel less like a man. When the vasectomy is done, will you look back on the man you are today and conclude he made a good decision? Can you trust him with your balls? How will you know?
/r/MarriedRedPill15/02/21 09:13 PM
2

What will your unfucked self look like? How do you get from here to there?
/r/MarriedRedPill15/02/21 09:09 PM
1

Why cede control of one's choice to "widespread opinion"?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 08:54 PM
1

2 5' 8" b. ’82 m. '05 several kids 163 lbs. 15% navy Bench 5x5x173 squat 5x5x230 dead 3x5x301 "I am a man who ______." What fills the blank? "... fucks"?"... is high value"?"... lives at his edge"?"... is red-pilled"?"... is abundant"?"... happens to the world?" Really? Where'd that come from? Who filled-in that blank? Did you fill it? Who did you fill it for? You? You sure? What you fill it with? Do you really know the answer to any of these questions? Are you sure? Are you scared that you aren…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/02/21 06:05 PM
2

Right. No drama. Just be, accept, and grow. I do hope he recovers.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/02/21 02:52 AM
2

1 5' 8" b. ’82 m. '05 several kids 163 lbs. 15% navy Bench 5x5x173 squat 5x5x230 dead 3x5x301 2020 was pivotal. Ended it shedding 35 pounds and 13 navy bf points. Discovered MRP, PUA, and NLP. Began it completely ignorant that such a thing as frame exists; ended it with a whole tool bag for expanding and growing it. Began it reading only history and philosophy; ended it reading over 30 books, many of them more than twice, about MRP, NLP, and PUA concepts. Began it hating my work; ended it liking…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/02/21 06:33 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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