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roxelay Archive

View 2 posts and 49 comments by roxelay on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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10

It’s both! Like, I’ll dress up or try to look a certain way so I feel good, and then my confidence just radiates out. When people (men and women) respond with compliments, it becomes this little feedback loop that keeps going.
/r/RedPillWomen28/06/26 05:02 PM
6

I'm gonna say this here because this group is safe. I really believe part of womanhood and femininity is bringing people together and creating welcoming, safe spaces. Pointing fingers at someone because they have a different opinion isn't helpful, how is that gonna help anyone? As long as they're not hurting anyone, why attack them? I'm glad you're here!
/r/RedPillWomen23/05/26 03:37 AM
1

First, happy Mother’s Day! 🎉 Second, I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. Based on everything you’ve shared, it sounds like you’ve married a scientist, and honestly, "he gets obsessed with something when he’s trying to do it" is basically what makes a scientist keep pushing through until they crack a problem no one else has solved yet. That’s just his personality and his choice, and you can’t change that. I think the key here is to focus on your role and what you bring to the table rather than exp…
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/26 05:20 PM
2

Great! Based on your original post, it sounds like your husband is a decent guy. Have you tried talking to him about work/life balance? Not in a critical way, but just framing it around what "you" prefer and seeing how he reacts. Sometimes people don’t realize there’s an issue until you communicate it openly, but also respect his opinion even if it is not what you prefer. If he prefers his current lifestyle, then you need to respect it, that's his life and his choice.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/26 09:13 PM
1

Honestly, it sounds like you are happier on structure and strict work/life balance (which is totally valid!), while he’s more go with the flow. Things like working from bed, random midday family visits, or sleeping in the middle of the day sound like a nightmare to someone who needs clear boundaries between work and personal life. I’m the same way, when a guy lacks structure and lets routines fall apart, it comes off as him not having control over his life, and perspective and honestly, that’s a…
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/26 01:00 PM
3

yesss this!! literally no fluff, just facts 👏
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/26 05:40 PM
13

I totally get what you mean! My experience was the same, as soon as I dropped the idea of dating, let it go, and focused on myself (almost went into nun mode, haha), guys started approaching me! I remember getting rid of all my dating apps and focusing on activities I loved: visiting museums, taking knitting classes, going to movies by myself, working out every day, hitting up yoga classes, and shopping at Macy's. I did all of this just for me, not for external approval or acknowledgment. And gu…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/26 01:44 PM
1

This makes so much sense! Thank you for sharing your experience! It’s strange how hard it can be to find answers like this. I really appreciate your realistic response based on personal experience!
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/26 02:58 PM
2

Tell me about it, lol! He’s been super successful at converting me though. I’ve been watching every single movie and documentary with him. Thanks for making my morning so much fun! 😂 I can't stop laughing!
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/26 12:40 PM
1

This is very good post, thank you for sharing it here!
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/26 04:17 AM
3

Not all men fit the mold, but there are definitely some gems out there! Excluding the weirdos, I’ve encountered a handful who are genuinely serious about long-term relationships and marriage (or equivalent legal commitments).
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/26 04:16 AM
3

Yes. Absolutely. This makes a lot of sense! Thank you for sharing.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/26 04:13 AM
2

I met him at an event at a museum in town. Honestly, I think the right people are usually found in places you'd expect, you know what I mean?
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/26 12:55 AM
5

This! I’ve honestly experienced this myself. Once I stopped using online dating and started going to things like speed dating, in-person group activities (volunteering, city events, soccer clubs, stuff like that), and even women-focused activities like a knitting class (which can still lead to meeting people who introduce you to someone) I started meeting a completely different kind of crowd. That’s actually how I met my current boyfriend. He doesn’t even have social media, and he’s genuinely th…
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/26 05:35 PM
2

My mom always says the same thing. She believes that in your 20s, your body is more capable of handling less sleep, healing, and the physical work needed to raise a kid. She had me in her early 20s and often wonders how others manage to do this in their late 30s and beyond. Your comment just reminded me of that.
/r/RedPillWomen20/12/25 09:18 PM
2

^^ Same here... I never ask him to cover me, but he's always insistent on paying when we eat out. I don't push it because he really wants it that way. I usually bake and cook nice meals for him every now and then in return. I usually pick the places we go to eat thu, and I know what he likes the most, so we’ve never had any situations where he didn’t like the food or the vibe, other than the first couple of months when we started dating, of course!
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/25 05:26 PM
3

I totally agree with this. I think he’s being really direct. Everyone’s different, but my boyfriend was kind of like that at the start too. He didn’t kiss me or anything right away. But later, he did told me, and I think it was because he was nervous and didn’t want to mess things up by being too pushy or sending mixed signals. Plus, he didn’t want to freak me out and make me resent him. I really feel like he’s being straightforward about wanting something serious, not just a casual fling. I end…
/r/RedPillWomen10/11/25 10:54 AM
6

^^ I second this.
/r/RedPillWomen09/11/25 03:25 PM
3

I was thinking about the same thing! Plus, lately, for some reason, I’ve heard a few times from different people that apparently, men go through some sort of mental rewiring between 35 and 45. I’m not sure how true it is, but it strangely lines up with this.
/r/RedPillWomen12/08/25 03:38 PM
9

You saved my time! Thanks...
/r/RedPillWomen18/07/25 03:19 AM
1

To be honest, it’s not about red pill or any pill. I wouldn’t really put any label on it.
/r/RedPillWomen19/06/25 06:34 PM
4

I totally agree with this! If you don’t want to use dating apps (I’m not a fan either; there are way too many weirdos on them), just go out and do stuff! You’ll interact with new people, and trust me, they’ll ask you out. I literally met my current boyfriend at an art museum. I wasn't there for dating, but I was open to meeting new people, and it totally worked!
/r/RedPillWomen19/06/25 04:29 PM
2

I'm in my early 20s, and honestly, a lot of my friends in college might not admit it, but they’re definitely RPW. One of my friends has an interesting theory about this. We were all stuck at home during quarantine when we were teens, and there was a lot to learn, especially during a health crisis for us. Plus our moms where in survival mode, this left us thinking about who we are. For most women in my age (not that all families are the same), we had to pick up skills and contribute around the ho…
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/25 03:53 AM
2

I found this part super helpful, especially chapters 4, 5, and 8. I had so many flashbacks when I was reading those chapters! When I went on our first date with my current boyfriend, I actually followed the advice from those chapters without even knowing this book, and it totally worked!
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/25 09:43 PM
2

Yeah, way better! Some of them are more like a sanity check, but sometimes they have approaches that are totally new to me. Plus, some are just a good reminder of how things should be.
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/25 09:40 PM
6

I'm glad to hear you are recovered! And doing good. You might want to check out this Pinterest! I think short hair is a great opportunity to go for larger, more pronounced earrings, bolder eyebrows, and sharper colors for your lipstick. I personally think you can easily bring others attention/focus to other parts of your face if you do it right.
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/25 01:45 AM
9

Your comments make me feel like an old lady inside. My current boyfriend is quite a bit older than me, and I really like him because he doesn’t want to party all the time and never gets high. Plus, he doesn’t complain about eating 🐈😻 Lol, he actually really likes it! 😅😂
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/25 09:01 PM
1

There’s a book club happening right now that I think you might benefit from! I’m 40% through the book, and it’s pretty good. I already know a lot of what the author has said about self-care, but it’s nice to have it all together in a coherent way. I really recommend it! Surrendered Single Summer Book Club It might even change your perspective on college! A couple of years ago, when I was taking exams and working on my grades to secure a good college, I learned that when I feel good, I get better…
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/25 11:03 AM
3

u/Jenneapolis 🙏 thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen03/06/25 03:44 AM
3

Lol 😅 It was all about trying to live like we were in 1995. Like no phones, tv, or tablets in the bedroom. We checked the weather in the morning from ABC7 and drove around using paper maps, with minimal Google Maps.
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/25 01:04 AM
15

It's really interesting that you posted this at 15! When I was 15 (a few years ago), I went on what I called 'Nun Mode' for about a year. I didn’t know that’s what it was called back then, but my goal was to focus on myself, my style, and my lifestyle, and nothing else. I think it was the best decision of my life. I ended up getting into a good college and so much more. I actually really recommend starting that now! Especially if you live with your parents, you have fewer responsibilities, and t…
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/25 03:55 PM
6

40 OR LESS: YOU’RE STANDING IN YOUR OWN WAY You want to meet the man who’s right for you, but you’re unwittingly fending him off because you fear disappointment. You deserve to have a man who adores you and wants to make you happy, so help him get close to you by receiving graciously, making yourself available, practicing better self-care, and getting rid of the ex-boyfriends who are still cluttering up your dating space. Yes, you had a broken heart or two, but you can leave your ivory tower and…
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/25 03:28 PM
7

DO YOU: (RARELY: 5pts - SOMETIMES: 3pts- FREQUENTLY: 1pts) Date only men—even once—who meet your physical, financial, or educational standards? Ask men out on dates if you’re interested, just to get the ball rolling? Believe you would attract the right man if you were prettier, younger, thinner, etc.? Think marriage is too dangerous these days because so many people get divorced? Find that your work, friendships, or hobbies are unfulfilling? Stay in relationships whether or not they’re headed to…
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/25 03:28 PM
3

I'm like 5% into the book and already hooked 100%!
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/25 04:56 AM
3

🙏❤
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/25 02:19 AM
4

I’ve read your other comments here, and if you were going to moderate a low-key book club, I’d totally join without hesitation! 🤗
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/25 01:54 PM
7

Honestly, if he's truly a provider and cares about your well-being, he should be jumping at the chance to help you out. At the very least, he could offer some extra financial support, like an extra $300 a month, to help you get back on your feet. Or, he could take the time to help you find a new place to live within your budget. If he's not making any effort to help, it might be a sign that this is just a situationship to him, rather than a real relationship. Edit: I just saw that u/yktvvvvvvvvv…
/r/RedPillWomen20/03/25 01:48 PM
3

Any time! 😊 I know what you mean about pink. Honestly, I think it's all about how you style pink clothes. I actually have a lot of sold pink or with pink patterns pieces in my wardrobe. Positive ones: My boldest pink piece is probably my barbie pink office button-up shirt. One time, he suggested that I get a matching bowknot to go with it, that really made me almost melt, he was really cute when he made that comment 😅 I think it's safe to say that he's a fan of that shirt. I also have a baby pin…
/r/RedPillWomen16/03/25 04:56 PM
9

I completely agree with what others have said - every person is unique. Everything that u/Familiar_Accident802 said is spot on, and I'm just adding my own experiences. When you mentioned being Christian-minded, it reminded me of my own partner. He is a Christian-minded gentleman with a strong provider mindset, and he's 47 years young. He's never explicitly told me what he likes, but I've learned about his preferences through our conversations and time together. For example, he loves it when I we…
/r/RedPillWomen16/03/25 02:11 PM
2

Just rearrange what you said in your post: You both have really been enjoying each other's company, and you grow spiritually as a result of him in your life which has been great. That led to you thinking about your life and as the result of it you want to come clean and no more lies and hiding. You have been dating for 2 months, at the beginning you were afraid he would not date you if you were honest. Now you know that was a mistake and you should've been honest. When you met you did not disclo…
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/25 04:51 PM
3

You're doing a fantastic job! I recently started visiting a dermatologist once a year, and it's been a total game-changer. I just wanted to share a few things that have helped me, and maybe you're already doing them, but just in case... Try to get moving, even if it's just 20-30 minutes of yoga every other day. It's better than nothing, and it can really help you feel more energized and confident. Plus, it's a great way to clear your mind and relax. Next, make an effort to get out and do things …
/r/RedPillWomen08/03/25 07:32 PM
12

I totally agree with this ^ and what u/WildFemmeFatale said. their comments really sums everything up. My boyfriend is a lawyer, and he works long hours too. Sometimes, I check in with him, and if he has a little time for a break, I’ll swing by his office to have lunch or even dinner together. It’s nice to just hang out for a bit and give him a chance to take a breather.
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/25 01:24 PM
6

This is a good one^^! I was about to say something similar, but you nailed it. I can share from firsthand experience that I told my boyfriend how much a nice bouquet and fancy chocolates can make me happy on Valentine's Day. He was really happy that I made it easy for him, so he could just focus on the 'quality' rather than stressing about what to get or feeling he missed something. If I were you, I would just drop a clear hint next year, about a month before Valentine's Day. I wouldn’t bring it…
/r/RedPillWomen19/02/25 04:19 AM
3

I posted about this two days ago, and you can find it here. [Reading List Update (Books + Articles + Websites + Podcasts) ] At the bottom of my post, there’s a link, and others also suggested some really nice resources in the comments!
/r/RedPillWomen17/02/25 02:42 AM
3

Very good point. I'm not an expert and I'm pretty new to more committed relationships, but I've read a few books over the past two years about relationships in general, and every single one of them mentions this. So yeah, I totally agree that preferences on lifestyle, especially conversations about kids, are essential and should happen within the first three months. I love when people in this community share what they've learned with others here. Thank you! 🙏
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/25 02:51 AM
1

You’re doing it right. Just relax and text something that feels natural to you, but don’t be rude. Chad, by definition, is "the archetypal natural highly desirable male. Usually held out to be maximally naturally attractive across all Alpha attributes." Every single word in that sentence really depends on personal preference and definition. Trust me, believe in yourself, and you’re many people’s Chad.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 06:24 PM
3

i'm sorry to hear that, that's tough. on a side note, I’ve noticed something that might or might not apply to your situation. It seems like guys don’t really make an effort to find new friends. like, they don’t go out to new places to connect with people. I could be wrong, but this is just my observation based on college-age guys. It feels like they mostly become friends with those around them, like other students in their program. It’s kind of funny because it feels like a "situationship" 😅. li…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/25 02:36 PM
6

me too, curious about the answers... so far from reading comment i feel guys' friendships are just not really focused on providing emotional support... it seems like they're not always as good at being there for each other... i don't think it mean they can't be, just seems like it's not their thing. 🤷‍♀️
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/25 05:42 PM
1

i'm so sorry to hear about ur friend... that's literally so messed up. 😢
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 09:30 PM
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