| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 346 | Stalked, verbally assaulted and threatened by a man. Guess who is being interviewed under caution by police as a suspect? Me. | RANT | severnicle | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 02:06 PM |
| 24 | “Many men of conscience will spend more time shopping for tofu than they spend reading the feminist press.” | BOOK REPORT | severnicle | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/06/21 08:45 PM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 41 | Fathers not doing their fair share with bringing up kidsThe men seem to have no shame and will spell out that their contribution is less than zero as if expecting the world to think them reasonable! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/06/21 04:31 PM |
| 10 | New faveThanks :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/06/21 03:37 PM |
| 23 | New faveThanks. I'm single now though - life is good :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/06/21 03:19 PM |
| 51 | New faveI am you. And you are me. Abusive men don't offer much in terms of variety. We've all basically dated the same man... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/06/21 03:18 PM |
| 26 | Men are more responsive to women's facial expressions than our actual words.for some reason he sees it as an opportunity to start arguing with me Verbally abusive men see every interactions as an opportunity to assert power over you. Don't engage with them! They have zero interest in finding out why we're upset and 100% interest in telling you why you are wrong when you get upset. A look of disgust in his direction when he's being abusive and moving on with your life sound like a good response! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/06/21 03:07 PM |
| 147 | New fave"I'm so upset with you for crying when I abused you - how dare you?!" - every man I ever dated. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/06/21 02:55 PM |
| 14 | I am feeling immense guilt for leaving my relationship. Feeling like the bad guy and that I wasn’t patient enough. Would appreciate support to not go back to him.'Recovery' is a good way of putting it. I hadn't thought of it this way before but it makes so much sense! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/06/21 02:52 PM |
| 16 | I am feeling immense guilt for leaving my relationship. Feeling like the bad guy and that I wasn’t patient enough. Would appreciate support to not go back to him.Posting here instead of texting or calling is a good idea, I think. If it works for you, perhaps accept the feelings you're experiencing? Guilt and shame are difficult things to experience. A quick an easy way of getting rid of these feelings is to return to the relationship. But it sounds like this isn't a relationship you want to be in. Instead of trying to get rid of the feelings, maybe just accept that they are going to be with you for a while. You may be able avoid becoming overwhelmed by g… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/06/21 02:49 PM |
| 1 | Idea: while they’re distracted by porn, let’s take over.Girls and women already outperform boys and men in educational settings! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/05/21 04:38 PM |
| 9 | Found my next book.Yay! I have no idea either but if you were to set a date I would read the book by then :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/05/21 09:10 PM |
| 2 | Less TikTok and more reading books by Bell Hooks, Andrea Dworkin, Naomi Wolf, and many others"The Pornography of Representation" by Susanne Kappeler. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/05/21 08:38 PM |
| 3 | Less TikTok and more reading books by Bell Hooks, Andrea Dworkin, Naomi Wolf, and many othersin the last year, I had moments of thinking I may have to vote conservative What happened to the left? I really want to know. 20 years ago, if ever I heard someone say 'political correctness gone mad', I knew I was dealing with a right-wing bigot. Now, I sometimes do a double take: sometimes I hear 'political correctness gone mad' and the criticism from conservatives is that lefty men are engaged in the erasure of women as a sex class. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/05/21 08:30 PM |
| 17 | Found my next book.Hey, would you be up to posting about the book when you've read it - like a sort of book club? I'd like to read it again and know what other women think :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/05/21 08:04 PM |
| 9 | Found my next book.This is an excellent book! Can't recommend it enough. My favourite chapter is the one about denying men access (power means access). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/05/21 07:57 PM |
| 23 | How do you respond when men ask questions or make comments about your intelligence?Ask them to describe what they mean by 'intelligence'. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 08:40 PM |
| 5 | How to Spot a PAI'm dying to know now... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 08:29 PM |
| 4 | Porn is one of the leading factors in why couples get divorced. Divorce lawyers have been sounding the alarm since 2002.20 bottles full of urine. Because he can't be bothered to get out of bed. Or empty the bottles. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 07:44 PM |
| 4 | Porn is one of the leading factors in why couples get divorced. Divorce lawyers have been sounding the alarm since 2002.Imagining 20 litter trays and 20 little food/water bowls made me go 'aww' :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 07:42 PM |
| 4 | How to Spot a PADoesn't make eye contact during sex That's awful :( | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 07:31 PM |
| 11 | How to Spot a PAWhy did he take an hour to masturbate (am I missing something)? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 07:22 PM |
| 17 | Peyronie's DiseaseMy porn-sick ex told me I broke his dick - it was bent. I was bent when I met him. You see, denial can travel back in time. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 07:18 PM |
| 4 | Kick him out 2021: What do you refuse to stand for?Men who when challenged respond with: 'but I didn't do anything wroooooong' even though they've been out of diapers for decades. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 07:10 PM |
| 6 | Underneath the mask is another mask, and under that is an abuser 😩He wrote that you should be hopeful (read desperate) to find them in him. Exactly! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 06:52 PM |
| 14 | Self Appreciation or Gratitude: what do you love about yourself?What could be better than a strong moral conscience? :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 06:31 PM |
| 3 | WE ARE HUMAN FEMALE AND THEY SEE US AS SUCHAnyone who's not convinced by this argument may feel differently after speaking to women in prostitution or reading about their experiences. Men who use prostituted women are aroused by the degradation of women. Only humans can be degraded. So yes, men do see women as human. Just not humans afforded human dignity. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 09:00 PM |
| 2 | WE ARE HUMAN FEMALE AND THEY SEE US AS SUCHThey love to see our very-human-suffering! Men don't hurt women in spite of us being human but because we're human. Unfortunately, a lot of us are still stuck in the explaining phase: "If only we could find a way to help them understand that they're hurting us they would stop". It's as if we refuse to believe what men are telling us about themselves when they prostitute us and turn us into porn. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 08:51 PM |
| 5 | Why an abusive man won't stop bullying/ The benefits an abuser won't give up - Lundy BancroftYou've convinced me: I'm buying the book. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 08:36 PM |
| 3 | Make them call you MASTER 🎓 I finally did it, ladies! 😀😁Well done! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 08:35 PM |
| 18 | “Women nowadays base majority of their feminism on their desire to be like men”Feminism based on a "desire to be like men" is not feminism at all. Feminism recognises women as having worth in their own right - not in relation to men. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 08:29 PM |
| 3 | Getting ready to leave my narcissistic abusive ex forever!Wishing you all the best! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 08:04 PM |
| 2 | The loneliness of leveling up.I remember the days when "crazy cat lady" was an insult. Today, it's what I aspire to! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 08:01 PM |
| 9 | Many women are unsafe at the workplace.majority or workplaces are not safe for women My experience too. Only safe workplaces I've experienced have had no heterosexual men. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 07:58 PM |
| 5 | The loneliness of leveling up.Cats! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 07:48 PM |
| 11 | The loneliness of leveling up.clearing weeds so that a beautiful garden can take root I like this :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 07:42 PM |
| 3 | The loneliness of leveling up.Yes, I can relate - down to every single detail! Thank you for your post - I needed to read this. Over the last few days I have felt lonely and reached for the phone several times but put it down after remembering my "friends" are nothing of the sort. So many of them have done things that have had me thinking "I wouldn't tolerate this from a date". It doesn't feel good to feel isolated but I think getting to point where we're able to redefine abusive relationships is a cause for celebration! :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 07:36 PM |
| 12 | My philosophy on menI’d rather be alone than feel alone in a relationship The only times I've ever felt lonely were time when I was in relationships with men who didn't see me as a person. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/04/21 04:02 PM |
| 4 | HelpThat sounds really tough :( Be kind to yourself. Have you thought about keeping a diary and writing about how you feel each day? You can go back and read older entries and notice how things change from day to day. Perhaps you'll notice that some days hurt more? Or that each day hurts a bit less? Maybe you could write yourself a really compassionate letter and some encouraging words to help you get through this? If it's difficult, you could write it as if writing to a friend in the same situation… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/04/21 09:13 PM |
| 89 | Woman's abusive ex boyfriend showed up to her house to harass her. She stood up to him like a queen!I had blocked him. So he called a family member and asked to get me on the phone. I am still speechless. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/04/21 08:54 PM |
| 153 | Woman's abusive ex boyfriend showed up to her house to harass her. She stood up to him like a queen!'Will you marry me?' - my ex after 3 years of no contact, thinking my life had been on hold after we split up. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/04/21 08:34 PM |
| 2 | Stalked, verbally assaulted and threatened by a man. Guess who is being interviewed under caution by police as a suspect? Me.Thanks for the link! When authorities start taking male violence against women seriously, one consequence is that they will be better able to assess the risk of terrorist attacks by men already known to them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/04/21 07:39 AM |
| 2 | Stalked, verbally assaulted and threatened by a man. Guess who is being interviewed under caution by police as a suspect? Me.That sounds really tough. Just having to live next to him is bad enough. On top of that he's actively harassing you. I'm sorry :( I hope the hearing goes well and that you can get a permanent restraining order. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/04/21 06:58 PM |
| 2 | Stalked, verbally assaulted and threatened by a man. Guess who is being interviewed under caution by police as a suspect? Me.I also learnt about this from an article by Joan Smith. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/04/21 06:54 PM |
| 16 | Dead bedrooms, and men.Using cutesy words is very insidious. It's so cutesy that I didn't even realize that's what men were talking about. I thought they were complaining that women take up too much space in bed by sleeping in the shape of a starfish. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/04/21 12:13 PM |
| 4 | Stalked, verbally assaulted and threatened by a man. Guess who is being interviewed under caution by police as a suspect? Me.I'm sorry the CPS let you down. Though it's good to hear you had a good experience with the police. I hope this will be the case for more women in the future. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 10:22 PM |
| 5 | Is it just me, or is sending nude selfies a really stupid thing to do?Never ever send nude pictures. It's always a bad idea. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 09:51 PM |
| 22 | Stalked, verbally assaulted and threatened by a man. Guess who is being interviewed under caution by police as a suspect? Me.Does he think he can manipulate you into having sex with him “for the culture”? I honestly think men just want to degrade women when they sexually harass us. Maybe they think there's a slim chance sex but mostly, I think it's about humiliating us. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 08:56 PM |
| 19 | Stalked, verbally assaulted and threatened by a man. Guess who is being interviewed under caution by police as a suspect? Me.Yes male police and male armed forces are responsible for a disproportionately large amount of violence against women. Some rape crisis charities advice women not to report rape to the police. It's truly horrifying to think just how much damage the police and courts must inflict on victims on sexual violence. To the point where not reporting the crime is the best option. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 08:51 PM |
| 32 | Stalked, verbally assaulted and threatened by a man. Guess who is being interviewed under caution by police as a suspect? Me.But he was SO OFFENDED by her doing this he CHASED HER down the street filming her, screaming she was a racist. This kind of thing is common. It's happened to me many times - always after being sexually harassed. don't give a shit about power dynamics in racism. I agree because when you understand power dynamics you don't use power to subjugate others. Men who are antirasist are also pro-feminist etc. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 08:40 PM |
| 8 | I ended my situation ship this morningI don’t consider those years wasted Thank you for offering a different perspective. I often think of the years I've 'wasted' and it makes me really sad. Saving your comment :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 08:23 PM |
| 160 | Dead bedrooms, and men.Not only is it bad that the term 'starfishing' even exists but men complaining about it are basically letting the world know that they have coerced/forced a woman into sex and expect her to pretend to be into it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 08:18 PM |
| 12 | Stalked, verbally assaulted and threatened by a man. Guess who is being interviewed under caution by police as a suspect? Me.Thank you. Maybe I will make a complaint. Just need to build up the strength. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 08:03 PM |
| 30 | Stalked, verbally assaulted and threatened by a man. Guess who is being interviewed under caution by police as a suspect? Me.Yes, it's glossed over. And when we read the news, those kinds of details are removed. Making it seem as if men are not engaged in the mass murder of women when in fact they are. There are strong links between male violence against women in the home and 'domestic terrorism'. Men practice violence on women they know and then move their violence outside the home. The media will pick this up when it affects 'strangers' but fail to report that these men already have numerous convictions for violence… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 08:00 PM |
| 37 | Not to mention there can be professional repercussions for not performing femininityThanks for the story! OK, horrified that she took your picture and laughed. But the breaking chair made me laugh :) Must have been her heavy conscience trying to make itself known! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 07:49 PM |
| 44 | You Can Never Gain The "Respect" Of Men🤷Don't fall into the trap of male validation. That's an important point. Definitely one I struggle with. Feels like I was pushed into this trap as a girl and am only now realizing it's where I've been and trying to free myself! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 07:34 PM |
| 23 | Not to mention there can be professional repercussions for not performing femininityThe 'reward' is an absence of punishment (public shaming). So not a great reward. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 07:20 PM |
| 47 | Not to mention there can be professional repercussions for not performing femininityI stopped shaving years ago but would cover up because I still felt ashamed. And when I started not covered up (wearing shorts / tank tops) I would notice people sometimes pointing and sniggering and I couldn't handle the way that made me feel. So I started shaving. But reading your comments has made me reconsider! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 07:18 PM |
| 9 | Stalked, verbally assaulted and threatened by a man. Guess who is being interviewed under caution by police as a suspect? Me.I'm sorry to hear they did that to you and that you were treated like a criminal. The police referred to me as 'the suspect' - felt surreal. I'm happy FDS is here for women to support each other. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 07:07 PM |
| 21 | Stalked, verbally assaulted and threatened by a man. Guess who is being interviewed under caution by police as a suspect? Me.Yeah, I guess I still want to hold on to the fantasy that the police would have helped me if they could. It's scary to let go of that fantasy :( | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 07:00 PM |
| 26 | Stalked, verbally assaulted and threatened by a man. Guess who is being interviewed under caution by police as a suspect? Me.You're right and I wish I had a recording - will take your advice. At the same time, there were witnesses so it's not that the police didn't know what happened. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/21 06:55 PM |
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