TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

shcma Archive

View 2 posts and 21 comments by shcma on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
10

shcma/r/Divorce_Men29/04/24 03:02 AM
3

Spousal Support / Alimonyshcma/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 03:42 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

You must be acquainted with my ex….
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 11:19 PM
3

Maybe consider it more of a “don’t sit around and wallow is stress and depression”. It’s different for each person. I’m more in your boat about the “relief” feeling of getting away. But the process has become very stressful. Just the unknowns. So I’ve been getting back into some simple hobbies to give me things to look forward to aside from impending dates and such. Bought myself some new hiking boots, figured it’s an investment in some cheap healthy weekend activities, read books (never had the…
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/24 01:39 PM
10

Nope! Let her go. I’m not much further ahead of you brother. Mine came out to me as bi in 2021. No biggie, but what was problematic is she had feelings for the neighbor. I tried to hold that shit together for 3 years. Lots of resentment, ended in an open marriage for two years, and then me filing for divorce in April. Oh an I still got the emotional and verbal abuse accusations thrown around after all the trying. It’s hard…and will be for a while. But it’s a huge bandaid your ripping off. And an…
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/24 02:30 AM
1

Thanks. Missouri does not have any real solid calculation on alimony/maintenance so the other party has to prove need and it’s up to the judge if we cannot settle it. I realize her being a SAHM goes strongly in her favor. So I anticipate some alimony (so does my atty) but for a shortish duration. We met in college, we both have the same bachelors degree essentially, she’s 32, healthy, educated so I have those factors in my favor in arguing it down. We’ll see how it goes. I’m bracing for her to r…
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/24 07:17 PM
1

Oh I’m sure I’ll get stuck with alimony, I’m prepared to let to go to trial depending on the ask and how much. I’m just starting with “No”. I’ll try to remember to update.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 08:56 PM
1

As far as the custody, we are a 50/50 state so she will need to make the justification otherwise. In Missouri it’s presumed joint legal and physical is best for the kids until otherwise proven. If we want to go that route and get dirty I have psych ward records for her I can pull out. She was lazy, she knows it. The kids are more attached to me. I initiated the separating conversation due to basically being a single dad before and after work. I appreciate the input on the extracurriculars, that’…
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 08:29 PM
2

Initially she said she wasn’t going to ask for it when she proposed a collaborative divorce. Once I found notes regarding her “feeling unsafe” and other false crap about verbal and emotional abuse I disengaged from her and filed. So that was our last “talk about it” only other communications which got us the 90% there was via my petition and her counter petition. She tried a PDL motion to kick me out and appoint a GAL, pay bills, temp custody but a month has passed waiting for the hearing and it…
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 08:24 PM
1

I’m not expecting her to split cost she doesn’t benefit from. I am anticipating her needing it. Her parents live 3 hours away so not sure what her plan is….it’s assuming a hypothetical situation where she has to work as well. But I see your point if she has other plans. As far as “comfortable” I am using that term as one in which I am living with far less than what I currently have but still paying bills, roof over my head etc. right now I’m looking at 900 sq ft 2bd apartments after our 3000 sq/…
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 08:03 PM
1

I think we are 90% there on the kids. 50/50, joint legal custody has not been contested but the schedule is not determined and she has yet to provide a parenting plan.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 06:04 PM
1

Yea, I don’t know if that’s going to be her angle or not. I make a comfortable living but even if she got a huge chunk of it it’s never going to be enough to live the way we did before the divorce. So a job is going to have to happen for her. There is physically not enough money to go around to support two apartments, utilities, etc, and that’s easily demonstrated. I hope to start out more parallel parenting, I wish she wouldn’t have done the whole abuse BS. This would have been so much easier. …
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 05:09 PM
1

Not so much that she has a rich family. I just don’t think she’s come to terms with what getting a full time job and supporting herself will look/feel like. I’m prepared to carry the kids health insurance premiums as well so she’s got a lot less responsibility than I when it comes to life. Basically collect child support, what alimony she gets, and pay for herself and watch the kids 50% of the time. I prefer to be more of a parallel parallel parent after she tried to pull the false emotional abu…
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 05:02 PM
1

I don’t want to rely on her for childcare. I fear that’s gonna be her solution so she has less obligation to work. Especially after she started down the whole emotional/verbal abuse path at the beginning I don’t feel comfortable having that relationship with her. As far as schools and moving, I understand that. My oldest is only in 2nd grade and my youngest hasn’t started yet so while I know it’s not best i am factoring the impact as negative but outweighed by the better housing quality and dist…
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 04:18 PM
3

I got two girls the exact same age. I would be thrilled if sbxw would buy me out. I want flexibility in my next stage. Something like a nice apartment with a pool for the kids. I want to be able to enjoy my time with the kids instead of taking care of home projects for a year or two at least while I get resettled into my new routine. I think a lot will change for my kids (as with yours) I do my best to not get hung up on the “who moves out” thing. It’s best to just focus on being the best dad no…
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/24 11:25 PM
5

I’ve done this! It’s actually pretty cool way to get to practice socializing lol. And make some extra cash! By the end of the night I feel like a social butterfly lol
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/24 01:54 AM
3

My ex and I are separated on different floors so don’t have to cross paths. I just have one in my common area where she would have to walk through to interact with me. It’s where I am most of the time. I’m in a single consent state for recording so as long as it’s not in someplace like the bathroom you should be fine I think. I also keep my phone on my to pull out and put in record when I need it. I noticed she has one too lol.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 06:33 PM
4

Like my attorney said “if your marriage is over, just file” Letting her know what’s going on only hurts you. Be civil, calm, and calculated but look out for what’s best for you and your kid. Set up cameras if your worried about DV claims and can’t leave the house. Record everything
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 05:08 PM
3

I kinda had a similar situation. Currently in process of divorce. But didn’t really date or have a consistent relationship before stbxw. We met in college. I think I was 20. Quickly we got really close, started cohabitating. In hindsight it was rushed and probably more wanting the feeling of a partner and ignoring the red flags that we were not great for each other. 10 years later, 2 kids, last few years were open/poly marriage. We’re done. Honestly, focus on your self and your self confidence. …
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/24 11:08 PM
1

Yea, my attorney said to get out if I think I’m gonna catch false abuse charges but I’m not going to be a father that leaves unless it’s court ordered. We will see how dirty she wants to play. I’ll spend every dime if I have to. I’m 31 and have plenty of time to rebuild.
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/24 07:17 PM
2

Thanks, I’m trying my best to keep quiet, keep involved and hang on. Yea if she wants to go nuclear I’ll pull out her psych records from three years ago when she admitted herself to inpatient psych for four days. My attorney said initially to not pull that as it just looks vindictive and it seemed we were both wanting 50/50 at that time. We’ll see. Keeping that in my back pocket
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/24 03:44 PM
3

So I’m lucky in the fact that my house has a walk out basement with kitchenette, two bedrooms, full bathroom, and separate entry. So I never have to set foot upstairs and even see my wife and in-laws. I’ve been keeping the pressure on her to communicate regarding the kids only and have managed to rough out a 50/50 thing. The kids stay downstairs with me some evenings and nights. We’re alternating weekends too. With her false claims of abuse I’m just not addressing that and staying out of their w…
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/24 12:54 PM
3

Her motion actually said to use it. So I texted her and said “hey, can we just use that app now?” No response. So I bought the app, for both of us. Texted her and told her. Still nothing. Today she deflected from using it too while trying to schedule the kids. WTF
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/24 03:19 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter