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smoked_beef25 Archive

View 5 posts and 16 comments by smoked_beef25 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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9

This is a pretty nuanced topic. I was reading one of the more popular relationship repair books last year (If I can remember the name of it I'll come back and edit the post) talking about this challenge in marriage. Essentially the "I'm not happy" talk can trigger a sense of shame and fear in men that makes them want to withdraw and put their head in the sand. It starts the negative cycle and I think this talk is generally blindsiding for most men- it was for me. Some men probably trip up here t…
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/26 11:40 PM
3

You didnt do anything wrong- just remember that. She F'd up. I thought I did everything right too and got what you and I got. I feel the same way you do but there are upsides- you didnt get someone pregnant in High School, you didnt get STDs, you didnt get DUI's in college, you didnt let relationship drama derail your career or school work. I've had enough casual interactions to know that it's fleeting and not worth it. I do wish that I had understood women better before I married though. I over…
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/26 11:19 PM
2

Dude- this isn't trivial. She lied to you and took advantage of you to have a long term affair, just like my wife did (multiple times). Don't minimize it, because it sounds like maybe you're blaming yourself for this. People that cheat like that thrive on people like us taking the blame. My wife would refuse to have sex with me (because she was cheating) and treated me like shit all while expecting to be treated like a queen. Because I was in a rough spot (I was out of work for a bit) I sat ther…
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/26 01:54 PM
5

Just to be clear, I'm not an advocate for total sobriety. In a perfect world I would never drink but I think it has a lot of social benefits. I'm just saying that if you rely on alcohol in hard times, and over do it, it can and will worsen any negative feelings you're having. Unfortunately it takes the filter off and you and up looking like an overly emotional mess. Beer for the good times, gym for the bad.
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/26 12:58 PM
1

right on man. great comment.
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/26 02:29 AM
3

I'm curious if very social women want to date equally social men. Sounds like it's not a problem for you though.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 09:19 PM
3

It's weird that men find this weird.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 08:17 PM
2

agreed. I work in sales so I usually dont have a problem talking to people but dont always put in the organizing effort. You're right, it wont come to you.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 08:15 PM
2

thanks. The gym I go to is pretty big and I go at different times. I'll have to try to stick to the same times and locker area. Yea. it's good to have female friends with no history with.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 08:11 PM
3

the comments here are strange. Go with the intention of getting a good workout, act like a normal respectful human being and you're good. I'm not a yoga person but when I do the hot classes I feel like a million bucks afterwards
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/26 04:24 PM
1

As someone who's wanted to start a business and been met with some of the same reactions that you have, I'd say you have some deeper underlying relationship/personal issues beyond your business. If she is putting you down she doesn't believe in you, for whatever reason- I've been there!. Maybe you have some blindspots that you are not aware of. You said that you put out a lot of bids but not getting wins. This should tell you that you need to reevaluate something- pricing, value, whatever. Someo…
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 04:09 PM
2

I've experienced a lot of this. I wouldn't get too worked up about labelling her as a narcissist- it's shitty behavior no matter what you call it. I'm convinced that the "you don't see me" is right up there with " I love you but not in love with you" as a flashing red light that some one is having an affair. It's part of the NRE that's probably very addictive for someone like her. The 15 months of DB are also not a good sign. As someone who is experiencing something similar I strongly suggest th…
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 03:49 AM
1

Absolutely fantastic post man. Thanks for sharing. How old were you when you got married? what brought you two together? Would you say that you were kinda checked out of the marriage long before you caught her cheating? Sounds like you are very much at peace with what happened. Wish I could say the same thing! How were you getting hookups two weeks post divorce!?
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/25 03:40 AM
1

I'm not not serious but I've got some things to work out before it makes sense for me to leave. I'm not being naive here, I know what's going on. I'm just dragging my feet. The evidence for AP2 is not as convincing as AP 1 (I caught them together), not that it matters though...1 should be enough right? The problem is that her tune is changing (I think for the better) the more I work up the nerve to leave. She's swearing up and down that she's doing everything she needs to do to make this better,…
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/25 02:31 AM
3

I was 90% sure she wasn't having an affair also. If you spend enough time reading about affairs on reddit they almost all follow the same pattern. it's uncanny
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/25 04:45 PM
2

I know I need to leave. It's just not easy.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/25 04:42 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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