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somedayimight Archive

View 8 posts and 118 comments by somedayimight on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Do you compliment each other? My husband does this wonderfully helpful thing where, when it's been a while since we had sex, he says, "come on. It's going to be awkward. We're going to do to it anyway. Let's go" and it's funny and it IS a little awkward at first, but then it's all better afterwards. I don't know if that would work coming from the wife though. Could there be any other reason why he isn't initiating? Is he feeling respected at home? Is he feeling admired? Is he feeling manly and s…
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/26 11:59 AM
6

For me, the feeling grew gradually over time. The more I got to know him, the more I liked him and the more I could see a real future with him. How early is "early days"? I would say I knew pretty confidently that I wanted to marry my husband by the one year mark.
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/25 01:09 AM
5

Mine is houseplants and gardening. I get surprising amounts of joy from tending to all my little plant babies and they make our house feel homier. But I also agree with the other person who said a hobby should replenish you. I have a pile of mending that keeps just sitting there because I'd rather do other things 🤷‍♀️
/r/RedPillWives29/09/24 12:01 AM
3

Trust him! Believe him. Receive his love and affection. It's rude to question him. He knows what he wants. Believe him when he says he wants you.
/r/RedPillWomen30/06/24 12:09 AM
1

I'm interested!
/r/RedPillWives20/01/24 12:50 AM
5

Thank you so much for your comment. I don't think I'm overweight (140lbs at 5'6") but that could look a lot better if I had more muscle 🤷‍♀️. It's not even really about the number on the scale. I just want to be able to wear the clothes I used to wear without feeling like they're too tight. I managed to get back to 130 after each of the other kids so that feels doable. I was in excellent shape and 120 when we got married, but I'm not trying to achieve the impossible! Haha And you're right of cou…
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/23 10:17 PM
4

I think I'm good at expressing joy! And he's wonderful and gives me plenty to be joyful about. But sometimes he does this "tough love" thing that I don't really like. Thank you for your response. I know he loves me. This just shook my confidence a bit. He's not perfect, but I would never tell him he needed to lose weight for any other reason than health. Maybe that's part of his motivation in his comment to me too.
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/23 08:31 PM
2

Thank you so much for your thoughtful response! I did tell him that I needed to hear that he thinks I'm pretty but then he said it felt forced and it's true - it didn't really help. And you're right, I'm terribly dependent on other people for validation (him in particular) and I need to work on that.
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/23 08:26 PM
4

This is amazing!!! What a tremendous eye-opener! It feels like you just fixed the issue in my brain. I can't thank you enough for sharing your perspective. It's truly made a world of difference. 🙏
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/23 08:17 PM
6

Thank you. I will try to do this. For some reason my brain is just holding on to this one. It's probably hormones 🤷‍♀️
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/23 08:15 PM
12

Yes! Our sex life is good! And he'd been extra flattering lately so I'd been telling myself, "he finds me attractive and that's all that matters!" But now I'm full of doubt ☹️. I think the wants me to take better care of myself. He wants me to wear dresses but I don't think they're flattering right now. I usually just wear yoga pants and one of his old t shirts. Thank you for your response. I need to focus on all the other evidence I have of his love and try to forget about this one negative com…
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/23 08:14 PM
15

The sending a picture is great advice! Very diplomatic
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/23 08:30 PM
8

Same! People are quick to judge 🤷‍♀️
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/22 10:46 AM
2

Thank you for responding! I was really thinking about doing the coach training but it's just way more expensive than I was expecting. I'm glad you found it helpful. I'm still kind of day dreaming about being a coach but not at them moment, haha. I think I'll just stick with the podcast for now 😁
/r/RedPillWives26/09/21 08:38 PM
2

Thank you so much for such a thoughtful reply! I've been telling my mom and sisters and even one friend about her books hoping to sort of help myself create a little group to keep each other accountable. When I'm really practicing the skills, everything in life seems easier and better and my husband seems much happier. But last week wasn't great. I get discouraged when I feel like I'm backsliding and I should know better by now 🤷 I'm glad you had success with the program. I just learned that she…
/r/RedPillWives12/04/21 12:05 AM
5

Thank you so much for your reply! I don't consider my marriage to be in crisis. I just want it to be as good as I can make it, haha. Do you feel you're still benefitting from what you learned while doing it? I feel like things seem to improve while I'm actively reading her book or immediately after listening to the podcast, but weeks or months later I discover I've slid back into old habits without noticing.
/r/RedPillWives10/04/21 10:55 PM
2

Can you ask for some time at the weekends? Even just an hour or two to myself makes a world of difference for me.
/r/RedPillWives05/01/21 06:14 AM
6

I think it totally depends on the baby! My third is eight months old now and I get more cleaning done then I did when my first was a baby. She's just a really easy going baby and oldest wanted to be held all the time. For me, sleep was always the biggest factor. Maybe you'll be lucky with a great sleeper! But have compassion for yourself. You may have weeks where you feel awesome and on top of things and then some days where you all you manage is keeping yourself and the baby fed. Try and have p…
/r/RedPillWomen02/12/20 08:03 AM
3

You're so right. I know his love language is physical touch and I've had to remind myself of this often. I like to think I've gotten better at these little touches throughout the day, but I forget that covid has made me his default everything. He gets lots of physical contact from our son but as that's mostly play fighting I guess it's not the same 😂
/r/RedPillWives20/09/20 03:27 AM
1

Please do that thread! I would be grateful, haha. And yes, I don't know. This is our third baby and for some reason I'm having the hardest time dealing with a post-partum body this time. I'm sure the older one gets the harder it is to bounce back, but honestly I think it's more psychological than physical. Who knows? Thanks so much for your response ☺️
/r/RedPillWives20/09/20 03:23 AM
3

I think so. I try to. I'm still breastfeeding and waking several times a night, so I don't have much in the way of sex drive, but I'm always willing when he wants to and I definitely still enjoy it. It just doesn't occur to me to initiate much. I guess I could do more. It feels unfair that he gets better looking as he nears 40 and I'm just getting more wrinkles ☹️
/r/RedPillWives19/09/20 11:58 PM
2

Yes! Thank you. We definitely could use a date night but don't really feel comfortable going to restaurants at the moment. We had a sort of date night at home a week or so ago and ordered take out and ate it after the kids were in bed. It was nice but I think maybe next time I will get dressed up for it. It feels pointless when we aren't going anywhere, but it would make it feel more special. And I think I'm also just generally feeling kind of down about my appearance and it's not fair to put th…
/r/RedPillWives19/09/20 11:45 PM
6

I doubt it's you. I've been surprised at the way old friendships have kind of died with friends I've had for decades due to differences in lifestyle and worries, etc. I'm not sure the main cause, really. I sometimes think it's because I stay home with the kids and they work but who knows? Are there other places you can meet moms that are more like you? It took me a long time to find mom friends but they are invaluable. You may not be able to commiserate about having a crappy partner (which, unfo…
/r/RedPillWives05/02/20 01:03 AM
1

I agree with this. I told my husband years before we had any kids that I wouldn't be offended if he wanted to be extra sure our babies were his. I knew they were mine. He should get that certainty too if he wants it (he never took me up on it). And as far as allegations of cheating go - no it doesn't prove fidelity, but it does reassure men they're not investing time and resources into someone else's child without knowing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/19 12:46 PM
2

Me too!
/r/RedPillWives17/05/19 12:25 AM
2

That's exactly what he does! And usually I'm happy to give him time to play video games but when I feel like I never get a break to do anything like that it feels unfair. Anyway, your comment helped me so much. I can't thank you enough! I felt completely different this morning and he could tell. I wish he would tell me more about what's going on, but I will try and remember to be patient and compassionate. Thanks again, truly.
/r/RedPillWives25/02/19 04:59 PM
2

Thank you. That's good advice. I tried to explain it to him last week and I think it just made him feel guilty. We're both stretched pretty thin at the moment so nerves are short.
/r/RedPillWives25/02/19 11:38 AM
2

Yep! Verbal affirmation is definitely my love language. I've been working on talking to him in his (physical touch and acts of service), and I've been trying to give myself the mental pat on the back that I need. It's hard though. I'm not very good at asking him to do something without it sounding like criticism. Your phrasing is good. I'll try something like that. Thanks for your response!
/r/RedPillWives25/02/19 11:36 AM
1

This is a joke, right?
/r/RedPillWives25/02/19 11:32 AM
2

Yes, that's a good idea. I keep thinking if he would share more about work, then I would understand more and feel more connected but he rarely wants to talk about it and he hates when I ask. Something unrelated and not serious to talk about would be great. Thank you!
/r/RedPillWives25/02/19 04:40 AM
2

I don't want to give him anything else to worry about right now. He's already stressed at work. I'd hate for him to feel like he's letting us down at home in some way. I just want to change my way of thinking about this. Any ideas how to do that?
/r/RedPillWives25/02/19 04:38 AM
7

Thank you. This made me feel a little tearful. I'm able to cultivate this kind of mindset some of time, but I'm having a hard time making it last. And you're absolutely right about the covert contracts - I often do things because I can imagine his reaction - his smile and appreciation and when he barely acknowledges it, it feels bad. I will work to do things just to make his life easier, and not to earn myself little bursts of praise. There is satisfaction to be found in doing a job well, whethe…
/r/RedPillWives25/02/19 04:36 AM
3

Yeah, I'm not used to getting rejected for sex either! Haha. But I know he's tired. The spiral you described sounds so familiar. You just wait it out? I've been trying to go elsewhere for my emotional/social needs (that sounds terrible - I just mean family and girlfriends). But honestly my family often lets me down and I can usually complain to my husband about that, haha.
/r/RedPillWives25/02/19 04:30 AM
5

Wow, thank you so much for your perspective! This is just the wake up call I needed!
/r/RedPillWives25/02/19 04:25 AM
2

Yes! Thank you. This has been stressing me out lately. I feel like I really have no idea what I actually look like. Any tips on figuring that out?
/r/RedPillWomen21/10/18 11:22 PM
1

Thanks! I've been meaning to go to old Navy anyway so I'll definitely have a look 😀
/r/RedPillWives09/10/18 01:26 PM
3

I'm getting so much good info! I don't wear shoes inside the house either but my husband does not find my giant socks cute. Maybe I need girlier ones, haha. And I used to wear tights all the time! They make legs look great! Haha. But I only really wore them in winter. Do you wear them when it's warm too?
/r/RedPillWives09/10/18 11:42 AM
1

Thanks. How long are the skirts? I know people recommended maxi skirts and dresses but they just feel formal to be (and hot in the summer).
/r/RedPillWives09/10/18 08:25 AM
1

Thanks for your reply and for the links! I agree those ones are a bit short but if I had leggings underneath they'd be great! You find ballet flats comfortable enough to wear all day? And I'm ashamed to admit that I've gotten so used to stretchy clothes, even jeans seem uncomfortable 😯
/r/RedPillWives09/10/18 08:23 AM
1

Ooh, interesting rule! It does feel somehow wrong when I'm putting in more effort into how I look when I go see friends of mine, than I would just hanging out at home with him. Sometimes (if everyone naps well, haha) I get all dolled up just for him coming home but that sort of feels silly and I'll just be taking it all off a few hours later.
/r/RedPillWives09/10/18 05:31 AM
1

Can this be possible?? How amazing if so! Thank you so much. I'm definitely going to try these 😁
/r/RedPillWives09/10/18 05:25 AM
1

Ooh, thanks! Could you please share some examples? I can't seem to find any that don't look like I'm going to the gym and then any dressier top doesn't go with them ☹️
/r/RedPillWives09/10/18 05:24 AM
1

Yep! Two shirt method all the way! Haha. Do you mean you pull the dress all the way up to nurse? I can't quite picture that. How stretchy are the skirts? I got one that was kind of like that a few years ago but it was so form fitting I didn't really feel comfortable in it and I never wore it (gave it to my sister who has sexier tastes, haha) It's tricky because I know husband doesn't want me looking too sexy (at least not out if the house, haha). And we rarely go out on dates at night so if I do…
/r/RedPillWives09/10/18 05:21 AM
2

Thank you! Yeah, I have some good dresses. I'm currently still breastfeeding though and I don't really like pulling down a dress to nurse (pulling up a shirt feels much less exposed). I got one that's especially for breastfeeding though. I guess I should make a point to wear it more often!
/r/RedPillWives09/10/18 12:44 AM
1

Thanks! I have some cuter tops. I guess I need to buy more. What do you wear on your feet? In the winter I can wear boots, which makes leggings look much more fashionable. But in the warmer months I feel like running shoes or sandals aren't as cute.
/r/RedPillWives09/10/18 12:42 AM
8

The silly fun is so important! I love all of these. I think it's good for everyone too. We took a walk with the whole family over the weekend and it was so hot I sprinkled water on my son's head and then told him to go do the same to his dad. It lead to a whole family water fight with lots of laughing. It was awesome!
/r/RedPillWomen31/07/18 01:35 AM
5

I think both people should feel lucky. It keeps them from becoming complacent. But maybe it's more important for the woman to feel lucky.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/18 12:15 AM
5

I had a similar experience in that it made me realize perhaps I'm not as great a partner as I thought. After reading the chapter, I actually went to him and told him some of the things I admire about him. It felt pretty unnatural and he seemed embarrassed to hear it, but he's been more affectionate ever since so I think he really heard me. I always assume he knows what I think of him, and it feels awkward to say it out loud. But that is no excuse! I intend to continue having these awkward conver…
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/18 11:56 AM
4

"It was a surprise, but not a shock" - Yes, this sums it up perfectly! I knew it coming sometime, but I didn't know he'd gotten a ring and I was totally surprised on the actual day 😁
/r/RedPillWomen22/12/17 11:49 AM
3

I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost a pregnancy at 20 weeks. It was terrible. Some days it still is. And it's very, very isolating. You definitely do need emotional support, but you might need to go elsewhere to get it. My husband's grief was very different from mine. He seemed over it and ready to move on much sooner than I was. I think he preferred to not think about it. That was how he wanted to cope. But I desperately needed to talk about it. I still do. I learned that it was best to talk to …
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/17 06:33 PM
3

I was thinking of shaving stuff because this is one area where I know he's just using cheap, disposal razors. What kind did you get, if you don't mind sharing? And I actually got him workout shirts before! That went down well. In general I've given up getting him clothes. He's tall and stores never have his size so he does online shopping and even then it's pretty hit or miss.
/r/RedPillWives12/12/17 01:12 PM
1

That's so sweet! I would love a kitten, but husband only tolerates my grouchy old lady cat because of me. We used to go to shows more. Maybe I can find one he'd like. He has said he prefers experiences to things. Thanks for the idea!
/r/RedPillWives12/12/17 01:01 PM
3

He likes acts of service and quality time and physical touch. That's a good point. He's said more than once that it would be nice if my parents would babysit more often so we could do stuff just the two of us. Maybe I'll arrange a date night! And your husband sounds like me! I hardly ever buy things for myself and it's so nice when he notices I need something. Maybe I need to be more observant of things he needs. I know he's almost out of shampoo so I was planning on getting something nicer than…
/r/RedPillWives12/12/17 12:58 PM
1

Yeah! I made him something like that before we got married. I think he liked it. But he's not as sentimental as I am and I think it meant more to me making it than it did to him getting it, haha. But I haven't done anything like that since we became parents. Maybe it's time to try again! Thanks for the suggestion.
/r/RedPillWives12/12/17 12:54 PM
2

Making his own gaming system sounds awesome!! But expensive. I was hoping to keep it under $100. If it's too much for this year, maybe I can reach out to you next year! An our son is only 3 but I bet that would be a great father-son bonding thing. Husband has built his own computer. And I know he did some coding in college. But he's not a programmer. He plays on PC. Game he's playing lately is black dessert online. And thank you so much for your response!!
/r/RedPillWives12/12/17 12:11 PM
1

This is definitely true about not sprinting straight to sex! For the first few years after having our son we never knew how long we would have (not a good sleeper). It was always rushed and not in a sexy quickie-in-the-kitchen-before-work way. Now it feels so luxurious that we can take our time and enjoy the foreplay. I was surprised to learn that he missed it too.
/r/RedPillWomen18/11/17 12:30 PM
1

And I'd forgotten but I read one of gottmans books early on in our marriage. I should probably take another look!
/r/RedPillWives17/11/17 09:25 PM
1

I don't think it's challenging, just not as open and ready to engage as I usually am. He's so good about it, though. Sometimes I know I'm being irrational but I can't let something go right away anyway and he'll call me out on it in a funny way until we're both laughing. But I know I could do better with body language in other ways. Thanks to you guys and this sub I've gotten in the habit of being more physically affectionate with him at home. And I like the idea of improving on that when we're …
/r/RedPillWives17/11/17 09:24 PM
1

Thank you for sharing! I didn't know avoiding eye-contact was disrespectful. My husband and I don't argue/fight often, but sometimes when my feelings are hurt and I haven't had time to process whether they should be or whether I'm overreacting, I need time alone to figure it out. If I have to walk through the room where he is, or he comes in to wherever I am I definitely do avoid looking at him and he always notices right away!
/r/RedPillWives17/11/17 12:36 PM
5

I'm 5 months pregnant and I was always exhausted by the time my husband came home from work. By the time we went to bed I could only think about sleep, so our intimate times had dwindled to the weekends because I have more energy earlier in the day. Occasionally he could come home for lunch and we managed to have sex once after my son went down for his nap, but I knew I couldn't rely on that. So, after waking up a little early one morning I decided that would be the best time. He always wakes up…
/r/RedPillWives13/11/17 11:46 PM
10

I agree with this, and this was my initial reaction to the #metoo thing. As a married woman in my thirties, it seems obvious how to conduct myself in a way that minimizes most of the risk. However, I started thinking about myself at 20, at 15, at 12. It was much harder then. Maybe my parents didn't explicitly teach me how to behave. Probably they did and I didn't want to hear it. But I often found myself in situations I didn't want to be in and couldn't figure out how I'd gotten there. That poin…
/r/RedPillWomen05/11/17 12:32 PM
3

We had a pretty big disagreement fairly early on (first few months) and I almost pushed the issue. I think in previous relationships I was more interested in proving to myself how much the other person wanted me. I remember it so clearly - I was about to stand my ground, insist I was right and see what he did. I felt like he might back down. But then I suddenly had this moment of insight where I realized this would set the tone for the rest of our relationship and I didn't want it to go like tha…
/r/RedPillWomen16/10/17 11:55 PM
6

I'm not sure if this counts as advice, more just something I've noticed about myself. Even though it was before discovering this sub, I did a pretty good job of deferring to my husband in most areas but I had a much harder time after our son was born. For some reason, letting go of control in this area seemed much scarier. It was as though I trusted my husband to take care of me, but I didn't trust him to do a good enough job taking care of a baby. This was unfair to him, didn't really do much t…
/r/RedPillWives17/09/17 11:52 AM
2

I really appreciate this different perspective. Gave it a try last night and I think a lot of it was in my head because it was great! Thank you 😄
/r/RedPillWives09/09/17 10:24 PM
2

I like this so much! It's a completely different way of thinking about it. And I think you're right, being so vulnerable when we both are doesn't feel as vulnerable. Thanks
/r/RedPillWives07/09/17 11:20 AM
2

Yes to all of this. I usually don't feel quite sexy enough to be the focus. I like to think that he's usually the focus, but I know he's thinking about my pleasure during sex. I don't know. It's all a bit complicated.
/r/RedPillWives07/09/17 11:17 AM
2

Yes! The bondage is a great idea. We used to do more of that kind of thing at the beginning of our relationship. And as far as telling him I just can't take it and want to have sex, that's what usually happens 🤣
/r/RedPillWives07/09/17 11:12 AM
6

So... I've been debating posting this question because it's definitely nsfw and also a bit embarrassing. But here goes! I don't love it when my husband goes down on me. I think it's because it's sort of a subservient act and I'd rather he stay in a position of power, especially in the bedroom (or wherever 😉). It's probably also that I have a hard time believing he really enjoys it. There have been a handful of times when he's ignored my protesting and just gone for it and those have been the bes…
/r/RedPillWives03/09/17 12:46 PM
2

Yes, that was my favorite part too, "respect to man does not mean, he won't hurt my feelings". And I've found myself much less likely to have my feelings hurt because I know that's not the intention.
/r/RedPillWives26/08/17 07:48 PM
5

Yoga pants and a t-shirt almost every day. I'm trying to get out of the habit but it's just more comfortable than anything else! Especially for taking walks and playing on the floor with the toddler.
/r/RedPillWives03/03/17 01:54 AM
1

Thank you! I can't wait to give it a try
/r/RedPillWives13/02/17 02:54 PM
7

That sounds amazing! Do you have a recipe for the meatloaf?
/r/RedPillWives10/02/17 01:19 PM
8

Yes please! Can we make this a thing?
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/16 07:05 PM
2

Yes! Mine is often, "it's not a big deal" because it usually isn't 😊
/r/RedPillWives28/07/16 08:12 PM
2

Yes, this! Or just letting it show on your face. Often my husband will see my face fall and apologize or clarify right away. Other times I remove myself to think about why it hurt my feelings and whether that hurt is justified. Recently he jokingly said something that hurt my feelings and I told him later that I knew he was joking but I was having a hard time not feeling hurt and he was very sweet and comforting. I just try not to sound accusing if/when I bring it up later.
/r/RedPillWives04/06/16 02:18 AM
4

I want to continue tracking calories. I did well with that this past month but I'd like to have more days where I am eating under maintenance than at or over each week.
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/16 11:45 PM
2

Yeah, I love this! That's what I usually do. "He's so good to me, I just want to make his life easier". But I like what you said better. Too much explanation leads to more questions.
/r/RedPillWives30/05/16 01:49 AM
3

I love "the happy wives club"! I'm going to start calling it that too :)
/r/RedPillWives28/05/16 12:50 AM
9

Yep. Love that scene and think of it often. It seems that nowadays many women don't get the chance to choose. Or if they do, they're shunned or shamed for admitting that having a family matters more to them than having a career.
/r/RedPillWives25/05/16 12:23 AM
3

I love the cerave in the tub and that's all I've been using on my face at night for years. However, now that I'm in my thirties I think it's time for some anti aging lotion. Any suggestions?
/r/RedPillWives13/05/16 12:35 AM
3

They were my first thought too! Doesn't she say something like, "I never let him forget he's a man"?
/r/RedPillWives11/05/16 06:01 PM
9

I think now that I'm so far into this committed relationship they're more likely to be comfort tests and they usually happen when I'm feeling a little insecure or need reassurance or something. I asked him if he found a woman we met today attractive. I sort of knew as I was doing it that I probably shouldn't. But I just found her annoying and I wanted him to think so too. He said she wore too much makeup which was nice to hear. Not sure how truthful it was, but I shouldn't have brought it up in …
/r/RedPillWomen18/04/16 12:43 AM
3

Yeah, I found that chapter really helpful because it changed how I viewed those activities. Instead of seeing them as selfish, I see them at necessary. If I'm not taking care of myself well enough, I get moody and irritable and I'm not doing my best job taking care of my husband or child either. So now when I find myself short-tempered I know I need more sleep or to do something from my lists. Mine include: Any housework but especially the things that look shiny afterwards Walk outside Shower Do…
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/16 11:40 PM
2

Yes! I read that book a few years ago and he took the quiz. I know mine is words of affirmation and his is physical touch and we both value quality time together. I just forget sometimes so I'm trying to make it more of a habit.
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/16 06:09 PM
2

Being more physically affectionate to my husband. I love him so much and I tell him and text him all the time but I've been reading how sometimes nonverbal messages are preferable to men. Just a little neck rub or peck on the cheek seems to really brighten him :)
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/16 12:01 AM
4

Thank you! Your post is just the reminder I needed! I've been feeling really overwhelmed and tired lately and even though I try not to, I've been taking it out on my poor husband. It felt like after finishing the Laura Doyle book, everything should just magically be better. But of course, if I don't actually change, nothing in my life will either!
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/16 05:51 PM
2

Bad: sister in law was visiting for the weekend and baby had stomach flu earlier in the week. I got it day before she arrived but had to basically get over it because husband came down with it Friday afternoon. So I took SIL and baby out and all over town Saturday to give husband a break and I was feeling a tiny bit resentful that he got all this time to recover and I got like a 3 hour break from the baby Thursday evening and that's it. Then SIL caught it Saturday night so my Valentine's consist…
/r/RedPillWomen16/02/16 03:27 PM
1

Chocolate :( tough, but doable
/r/RedPillWomen11/02/16 02:30 PM
4

So far all I've done is get my husband a card from the baby and let the baby make crayon scribbles inside of it. We don't usually do too much for Valentine's but I couldn't resist the cuteness of him handing his Daddy a card that he "wrote" in.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/16 03:17 PM
1

Congratulations! That it so exciting!
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/16 03:12 PM
2

Compliments! You can strike up a conversation with just about anyone if you smile and give them a compliment. "I love your earrings/nail polish/shoes/whatever. Also, as others have said, proximity is really the best thing. If you see someone often, it's more natural for a friendship to develop.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/16 12:53 AM
2

That makeup play date sounds so fun! Just like the kind of thing we did as girls :)
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/16 09:08 PM
1

Superb!! Extremely helpful and very well organized! Though I'm guessing you probably are too :). My mother was never an especially good housekeeper and I feel like lots of this is stuff I should somehow just know. I'm pretty good about the daily things and it was nice up see that I do most of yours, but apart from vacuuming I'm at a loss on the weekly chores. This is giving me a great template! Thank you, thank you, thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen02/02/16 12:50 AM
1

Good: finished Surrendered Wife, been wearing mascara every day so I feel more feminine and pretty, been doing more self care and getting more sleep so mornings have been much, much better! Thank you all for your helpful comments about that! Bad: my best friend and my sister are both in difficult times. I'm having a hard time just listening to them and not jumping in with my advice and opinions. Ugly: I feel disgustingly happy with my husband :) and we had sort of spontaneous sex last night! It …
/r/RedPillWomen02/02/16 12:33 AM
1

Yes! Thank you. I see it now :)
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/16 12:45 AM
1

Yeah, Relay for Reddit
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/16 12:35 AM
1

Is there a way to read the sidebar from a mobile device? 99% of my time on Reddit, I'm on my phone. I read the sidebar stuff initially but I'm sure I could use a refresher every now and then.
/r/RedPillWomen29/01/16 08:03 PM
1

I think that's a great ambition about phrasing expectations! If you don't mind, I think I might adopt it for myself as well!
/r/RedPillWomen28/01/16 01:15 AM
1

Thanks! I think that's what I'll have to do. I have a few friends who I think could really benefit from this but I'll have to make suggestions very carefully.
/r/RedPillWomen27/01/16 02:02 AM
1

Oooh, I really like that last sentence! I think that's it exactly!
/r/RedPillWomen27/01/16 01:22 AM
2

I don't know if it is like smoking though. I certainly didn't know a lot of this stuff for a long time and i wish I'd learned about it sooner! I think some of it could be helpful to friends but I'm not sure how to get them to try it. I imagine most rejecting it flat out because it goes against so much of what we were taught growing up.
/r/RedPillWomen26/01/16 08:20 PM
1

Yay! I have so many questions! Do you tell your real life friends about rpw? I feel fairly certain that most of mine would laugh in my face if I tried to explain it. But I'm really excited about it and want to talk about it! Do you tell your husband/partner about it? I stupidly did (because I tell him everything) before starting "The Surrendered Wife" and she explicitly says not to. Oops. I know awalt and everything, but, truly? I mean, I feel this stuff is definitely true for me and works in my…
/r/RedPillWomen26/01/16 07:27 PM
1

I used your advice this morning! I was really tired, we'd had a terrible night with the baby and I knew anything I said would sound grouchy so I just laid a gentile hand on his leg and he was so happy! It was like, he knew I wasn't happy but he also knew it wasn't because of him and that I was still loving him in that moment. Great idea!!
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/16 08:52 PM
2

This is amazingly simple and also profound! You're so right about the typical date night and I love your suggestions.
/r/RedPillWomen23/01/16 01:51 AM
1

Thanks. I know you're right and he would absolutely say it's something I can control. I think I just needed a good kick in the pants. The past two mornings have been much better since I have everyone's advice from here ringing in my head. Hopefully I can keep it up!
/r/RedPillWomen23/01/16 01:41 AM
2

Aw. Yeah, we had another mattress on the floor for a while and I would go between but more often than not I'd just fall asleep with the baby. He's really a pretty good sleeper most of the time if he's near me. I don't know. Sometimes I worry that he'll never learn to sleep alone and then how can we ever have more kids?? But he will. And I love the cuddles. As far as napping goes, I actually get in the crib with him most days so that once he's asleep I can sneak out and know he's safe but I occas…
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/16 12:49 AM
1

Oooh. I hadn't thought of that! Let me know if you do try it how it goes.
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/16 05:52 PM
1

Haha! I didn't think of this as an example of STFU but I guess it is!
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/16 05:52 PM
1

Thanks! I've heard of those. I'll look into it :)
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/16 12:45 PM
4

Haha, yes! I'm at staying home with the baby but I guess he's more of a toddler now. He's almost 15 months and he's our first but we want more! I used to nap with him in the afternoons because he often doesn't sleep well by himself. But lately he's been sleeping better by himself and I can get so much done while he's sleeping so I haven't been sleeping during the day. And he's still in the bed with us for most of the night so I can't really get up quietly without waking him and my husband. And i…
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/16 12:12 PM
1

That is great advice about doing something nice for him. This morning I know I wanted to bring him his coffee in bed and that it would be a nice treat for him. That gave me something to look forward to, so I woke up in a better mood today. I still don't think I can wake up without waking him, but I can work on getting up before him even if he's already awake. Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/16 12:02 PM
1

That it so funny! My moaning and groaning is usually, "I don't wanna be awake!" Which is pretty whiny and unpleasant. Maybe I can train myself to say something else too!
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/16 12:34 AM
1

That's so sweet! And what a great idea! I feel like all my mushy texts throughout the day used to make up for it, but it has to get old sheet a while. And it would definitely be nice if his first impression of me wasn't that "I-hate-everything..." Haha. That's exactly it, though! Perfect description :)
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/16 12:24 AM
3

I think you're right. Looking at everyone else's responses, I think I just may not be sleeping enough. I've finally got the baby at least spending the evening in his crib and then moving into our bed later on and I was so excited to have some one-on-one time with my husband without the baby that we've been staying up later lately. That's a great idea about getting things ready for him the night before. I'm sure he'd appreciate that and I usually have lots of energy in the evenings. And everythin…
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/16 12:20 AM
1

These are great! Thank you. I feel like I'm pretty healthy, generally, except for a need for dark chocolate every now and then! Haha. My sister suggested waking up before him too, but he sleeps do lightly anything that would wake me would probably wake him too. Although, that may have changed since the baby. Maybe I'll just try setting a quiet alarm and see what happens. It would certainly be nice if I could get into a better mood before he sees me. Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/16 12:15 AM
2

I'm probably not really getting enough sleep. We have a one year old and I've been so sleep deprived for the last year that in comparison to that I feel fine lately. But it's probably not really enough. And you're definitely right about autopilot and routine. Maybe if I start faking it a little bit now, it will become habit later and be easier. Thanks for the suggestion!
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/16 12:12 AM
1

That's a great idea about preparing lunch the day the before. I always think of doing that and the days I do, he's so grateful but most mornings I barely get up in time. Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/16 12:08 AM
1

Thank you so much! I realize I've read that water trick before but had forgotten so thanks for the reminder. And I'm sure you're right about the asleep cycle. We're still bed-sharing with the baby and I know my sleep gets interrupted in the early hours of the morning.
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/16 12:06 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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