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spin_the_globe Archive

View 7 posts and 189 comments by spin_the_globe on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Also Spinster.xyz, and some of the subs on Saidit.net like s/GenderCritical, but Saidit has had some problems lately with the site periodically being down for days.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 02:49 PM
1

Ovarit has never advertised itself as a female-only platform. Ovarit does allow circles to set female-only rules. Ovarit: We do not ban men from the site for being men. Many communities that are now on Ovarit existed for several years before Ovarit was created. Some of them banned men, most did not. r /GenderCritical never banned men in its 7 year history, even though the subject came up repeatedly and for whatever reason some people assumed men weren't permitted. We discussed whether we should …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 02:45 PM
129

Kink is the furthest thing from sexual "freedom" or "liberation." It must be a drag to not be able to just enjoy sex without a lot of theater and scening and pain around it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/21 03:00 PM
4

100%. If someone wants to go to all that trouble, that's their business and it doesn't mean they're gay/straight/whatever. But there's no reason to push all these extra steps on women or men under the guise of "hygiene" or "cleanliness."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 03:52 PM
40

Funny how they didn't give a shit about privacy violations with The Fappening a few years ago.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 03:38 PM
6

For an “anti-hate” sub, AHS seems to really, really hate feminism women. Fixed it. Oh wait, I can edit it down even further: For an “anti-hate” sub, AHS seems to really, really hate
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 02:45 AM
2

PM me, I can give you an invite. The main people behind it are former mods from r/ GenderCritical (MK Fain helped but the primary owners/drivers are the former GC mods) and there is a GenderCritical circle there, but there are other topics too. If anyone else wants an invite code, feel free to PM. I'll check post histories before I give out codes, just FYI.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 04:07 PM
28

I'm friends with someone who did all kinds of femdom work for a long time, and she hated it (and the clients). Some of them were outright physically abusive, it was a game for them to try to attack or conquer a domme. The whininess, neediness, demands, desires to roleplay child molesting or underage incest, racist fantasies, it just goes on and on. The underlying theme is men's selfishness and slavery to their dicks, and that the femdom is still just a toy to them to get what they want.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 02:31 PM
8

If it sounds too good to be true, it usually is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/20 02:53 PM
23

I hope he's learned from this and isn't going to decide that she's the abusive one, trash her to all his family and friends, and describe her as the "crazy ex" to future girlfriends. ...Who am I kidding. Hope is not a strategy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 02:13 PM
9

You're an abuse victim. But you're about to become an abuse survivor who leaves abuse and bad choices in the past. Adding to great advice already in this thread, here are some subreddits you might find helpful. I'm not linking them directly so as not to draw the wrong kind of attention to your post, but they won't be hard to find. Look at their sidebars for more resources, too: r/ OperationSafeEscape r/ domesticviolence r/ almosthomeless r/ beermoney r/ povertyfinance and eventually r/ personalf…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 02:10 PM
181

Kids need safe places to ask questions about sex and sexuality, and Reddit ain't it. I have no confidence whatsoever that sub isn't going to be used (or isn't already used) to exploit kids, even if that's not the reason it exists.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 03:22 PM
7

You have to wonder what kind of company culture these workplaces have, where thinking of this stuff and pushing it through to the highest levels is okay, and anyone who thought "this is wrong" either wasn't listened to or didn't feel safe disagreeing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 02:27 PM
17

Between this and the recent Audi ad with the toddler girl eating a banana, and the inappropriate caption, it's impossible for me to believe there isn't pedo normalization and grooming going on at these companies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 02:26 PM
7

Yep. He knows how he reacted to the photo and he's feeling called out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 01:31 PM
29

50 Shades made it worse, but this shit was sneaking into the mainstream long before that. Porn, soft porn, even articles in women's and men's magazines promising naughty fun. What we need are more articles from both women and men who tried this stuff and found it cringey/laughable at best and scary at worst. They're out there. So much of what's in sex fantasyland is actually not sexy and a turnoff when acted upon.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 02:24 PM
82

His hygiene started slipping around the time they started to try for a baby, and they weren't having a lot of sex before that. This makes me think that he doesn't want to have sex, possibly because he doesn't actually want a child (at least right now) and is trying to discourage her from wanting sex. She should not be trying for a baby with this man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 02:48 PM
10

Normalizing kinkmeisha behavior gets non-kinkmeishas killed. Men are trying so hard to own women's identities, everything from whether a woman is or was kinky to what "woman" even means. This has to stop.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 03:09 PM
2

That was pretty much the message of "Grease," too. And she didn't even get an HVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 03:27 PM
3

What I would want to do: Send him the poop emoji and then block. The adult thing to do: Skip the poop emoji and go straight to block.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 02:55 PM
5

It warms my heart to see so many women in the comments pointing out the red flags. I'll add one more: People like this are often high-conflict types who always have to have an "enemy" they're fighting against, so they can feel like the warrior, the rescuer, the avenger, the protector. When they don't have someone outside your relationship to be in conflict with, guess who they turn that bad energy toward? See also: Karpman drama triangle There are no exceptions. (Hard life lesson learned) Don't …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 02:53 PM
10

Yes, because apparently that's supposed to make him seem more desirable and encourage women to compete for his attention. Ha.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 02:47 PM
3

Notice he led with "emotion" because women are, y'know, just so emotional. Things like "kindness" "basic human respect" "as an adult and an equal" are for betas, I guess.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 02:46 PM
118

Taquitos? Fancyyyyy. The hero of the story is living his best big-boy life
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 02:02 PM
25

Beautifully written. The hardest part of improving ourselves is the people we can't take with us. It's painful. But it's how we make room for the people who can appreciate what we're becoming.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 04:35 PM
3

Yes, and browse r/wgtow for more inspo!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 03:58 PM
9

I propose Zero Value Male (ZVM) as the no-value term, to differentiate it from Negative Value Male (NVM).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 03:22 AM
4

Great story that shows how she took her power back. Queen energy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 03:23 PM
6

Please don't feel like you have to buy into performative femininity to be your best self. If you enjoy the tanning and fake eyelashes and all that, you do you, but ask yourself if that's something you want to deal with all the time for years. You can unfrump yourself through clothing, basic grooming, and behavior/how you carry yourself. Also, really really seconding the advice to take a year or more post-divorce before you start dating again. Find yourself first, then think about finding someone…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 03:21 PM
3

This post has a link to a PDF version. archive.org version (on desktop, use controls on lower right to change how you view it) If you're more of an audiobook person, there are audiobook versions online too, including to borrow through Libby, Overdrive, Hoopla, etc. Or join Audible and pick it as a free book (then cancel Audible when your trial time is done)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 03:16 PM
10

and gc_woc
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 03:06 PM
6

But these robots aren't and won't be free. These men will have to drop the games and porn and actually hold down a job long enough to afford a robot, and then be able to afford upkeep and repairs. Mom and Dad aren't going to buy them a sex robot. Nah, too much effort. Back to gaming, wanking, and hating the world for not catering to overgrown toddlers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 03:04 PM
16

Yep yep yep. A turd doesn't magically turn into chocolate just because it's wrapped in gold foil. The foil just hides the stink for a little longer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 02:56 PM
13

Negging is bullying. End of.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 02:23 PM
7

Does he have BPD? This sounds ike BPD behavior. Lurk on r/ bpdlovedones, especially posts by women about their BPD partners or ex-partners, and you'll see a lot of stuff that sounds familiar. You're not causing his pain and you're not responsible for fixing it. Codependence-related resources might help too. r/ codependency, "Codependent No More" by Melody Beattie, CoDA . Other good books to read: Why Does He Do That by Lundy Bancroft - There's a reason you see that title come up so much here. St…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 02:15 PM
4

Oh, I don't think she should invest. But he doesn't need investors, he probably needs a psychiatrist. If he's not willing to get help, she should leave. She can't save him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 02:48 PM
18

He went on about how a lot of women put their bio on dating apps that they require 6 inches minimum whaaattt? A "lot" of women? Can anyone here who actually uses dating apps confirm? I think he's making this up because he's insecure about his dick size, and claiming it's women's fault he's insecure.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 02:46 PM
25

If legit and not a troll: The boyfriend sounds bipolar-manic or hypomanic. I'm not a psych professional, just someone who's seen the behavior up close a few too many times. I'm hesitant to call this LVM behavior, when he might have an illness that's never been diagnosed and that he hasn't had the opportunity to get treated for.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 02:14 PM
8

You're projecting an imaginary person onto him. You got let down enough to block him once. What makes you think anything will be different if you contact him again? Do you really want to deal with an LVM who thinks he has the upper hand because you missed him?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 02:11 PM
17

That I could’ve just told him to F-off. They claim they want that kind of straightfoward or even rude communication, but we all know what happens when you do that ("niceguy" meltdowns and shitty stalkery behavior).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 02:03 PM
56

TRP seems a lot like MLM. Manufactured bullshit stories of wild success, but the larger and more realistic number of failure stories is hidden. You didn't try hard enough, you didn't follow the right people, you didn't spend enough money on bullshit books and bullshit coaching for bullshit methods that lead you nowhere. When it doesn't work - and the odds are overwhelming that it will not work - it's your fault, not the method's fault. It's all designed to take advantage of desperate people and …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 02:00 PM
19

They can't brainwash people by using terms that people already know and fear. They have to cute-ify it by calling it some kind of "play." As if you're not actually being choked or hit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 06:23 PM
16

For me it's Alanis Morissette's "You Oughta Know." Still a great song to rock out to if you don't pay attention to the lyrics. I used to see it as this angry anthem against shitty men, "fuck yeah sis, you tell him!" And then a decade or so later I realized, that song is completely the crazy ex-girlfriend trope. I listen to it now and I hear a pickmeisha who's bitter that she tried to be the cool girl, and he still dumped her for someone else, and her whole goal with her next relationship is to g…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 03:32 PM
31

"Stand by your man" "Friends help you move, but real friends help you move bodies" So many sayings out there that reinforce the idea of not having boundaries, and compromising yourself to support someone else's bad behavior.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 03:23 PM
6

If someone wants to cheat, he'll cheat, and what you look like won't stop him. If the only part of yourself you value and work on is your appearance, that's all you'll have to go on. You're worth more than that. Value your entire self.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 04:06 PM
12

They should rename it r/hugboxforlosers
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 03:58 PM
10

"What do you think of guys who like spoiling women with presents?" I wonder what they keep doing that makes them have to try to bribe their partners to get back into their good graces. I also wonder how often these men call women "gold diggers" or "spoiled" behind their backs. That's what I think of them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 03:49 PM
4

It's the terror of knowing what this burp is about Watching a good friend scream, LET IT OUT!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 12:59 AM
10

Dude would let it rip first thing in the morning WITH ME NEXT TO HIM IN THE BED What is it with men and their night farts and first-pee-in-the-morning farts? It's like I woke up at the zoo and the elephants have upset stomachs. Every guy I've spent nights with has been like this eventually. I didn't think the average man's insides could hold that much air.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 12:55 AM
32

that will ultimately cost them money, not make them money, and that will be another thing he holds over her head
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 02:41 PM
16

Sounds like you're on the right track. I remember reading somewhere that the opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference. Being your best self for yourself is its own reward. He can start appreciating you, or he can get kicked to the curb and enjoy the flight. Onward and upward for you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 02:01 AM
4

also keep an eye on twitter.com/rGenderCritical for updates. saidit.net is at least a temporary refuge but I don't know if the mods plan on that being the final new home. A lot of us have also gone to spinster.xyz too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 02:58 PM
20

The more mainstream and NOT overtly left- or right-leaning, the better. Gender criticality needs to be less politicially pigeonholed, not more.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 02:52 PM
43

I can't believe a support group has to worry about being banned from Reddit. But hey, let's all head over to r/ barelylegal or r/ strugglefucking for some healthy, wholesome, woman-friendly content.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 02:36 PM
21

He's already shown he values his fetish more than his own health, or her, or their relationship. Run, go no contact, and don't look back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 02:55 PM
33

Because porn taught them that. Good way to screen for pornsick losers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 02:49 PM
7

What's the worst that can happen if you don't find someone? You'll have education, probably a great job, hobbies, friends, children you can be around and influence through your work. Take things a day at a time, focus on the goals you've set for yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 02:30 PM
29

It's not your responsibility to save him. Don't lock yourself into codependent behavior. This will sound harsh, but I'd block him everywhere and move on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 03:49 AM
7

Someone's legs he could put his face between, instead of putting his face in a mask. Because in his world, apparently that's smooth talk that will have the ladies falling all over him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 03:13 PM
8

When someone tells you who they are the first time, believe them. He's telling her he's abusive. She should believe him instead of waiting months or years to see how bad it gets. If she were scouting locations for a new home and someone told her, "there's a landmine buried on that lot," would she build her house there and just hope it never exploded?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 02:59 PM
1

Needs a bucket of water poured into the toilet to show splashback all over the seat and even the floor, then leave it unflushed. Maybe spit a loogie on top of it for good measure.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 02:55 PM
6

A 37-year-old man is old enough to be a father to girls that age. Creep.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/20 03:46 PM
10

Being online around men is such a shitshow even on non-dating sites, for women who aren't trying to find a partner, just dealing with the way men can be. No wonder that OLD brings out even worse behavior. Think of what it can be like here on Reddit and then realize those same men are out there on dating apps.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/20 03:30 PM
16

Also, please be aware that even if you never have a joint credit card or loan, but you jointly own property or other assets, liens can be placed on those assets if he doesn't pay what he owes for the card or loan that's in his own name. Never co-sign or co-own with someone, unless you have visibility into their financial situation and 100% confidence in their ability and willingness to pay what they owe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/20 03:26 PM
7

He sounds like someone who's used to ordering women around.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 03:16 PM
6

Leave him. Absolutely do not have children with a cluster B. That would be terrible for you and terrible for the kids.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/20 12:58 AM
6

I think this is true but I also couldn't recommend anywhere for you to move, other than that the more populated the area, the better chance you'll find someone. Your best bet is to deprioritize men and relationships and build out other fulfilling parts of your life. Post-uni, find somewhere to live that has good employment opportunities and other good quality-of-life aspects. Ground yourself with a life you love (or mostly like) and then think about adding a HVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/20 04:13 PM
4

From the bio of the current "head honcho": Until meeting his ideal girlfriend on OkCupid, Scott was one of VIDA’s most loyal customers. So he didn't even meet his ideal match on the service he used loyally and now heads up. What a stellar endorsement.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/20 02:07 PM
12

HEY LVMs, WE DON'T WANT TO EXPLOIT YOU, AND WE ALSO DON'T WANT TO BE EXPLOITED *BY* YOU Not sure I can make it louder or dumberer than that...If they don't get it by now, I give up!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/20 03:22 AM
17

Why are men like this?? I have encountered this at work, in relationships, friendships, etc. State a boundary and they're an instant angry child with "Fine, I'll never xxx again!" It's like they're all given a script. Nobody told you to never xxx again, bro, just be a damn adult and learn how to engage appropriately with people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 02:29 PM
231

The guidance in FDS is, if anything, the opposite - how to spot mentally ill/traumatized men and stay the hell away from them. It's good advice, harsh as it may sound. But women will be demonized for not wanting to "rescue" these men and allow themselves to be exploited in the process.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 02:24 PM
21

So tired of men who try to mansplain women's orgasms. They don't know what it's like or if it's better or worse. Also, they're guaranteed to nut just about every time (unless they're pornsick) just from PIV, so they're the ones who have it good with sex IMO.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/20 02:56 PM
80

Throwing out kink gear was incredibly liberating for me years ago. I'd kept it around mostly out of sunk cost fallacy - these weren't cheap, I shouldn't just trash them! Then I realized, my life isn't a damn garbage dump, there was no need for me to keep garbage in it. I hadn't actually enjoyed any of the kink or found it sexy, so why have reminders of that?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/20 02:52 PM
3

Coding bootcamp to become a software dev. Or bootcamp and/or degree program to get into a tech adjacent field like user experience, product management, program management. https://www.google.com/search?q=how+to+find+a+6+figure+career
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 01:56 AM
129

The video is funny! I agree, let's not drag this guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 03:19 PM
15

Another vote for "you're better off alone than in a bad relationship"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/20 01:07 PM
9

It’s usually poor unemployed men who feel the need to abuse women to make them stay on their level. Wealthy and accomplished men who have plenty of options don’t go for nice bubbly girls just because they think they are easy to abuse. Don't be so sure. The poor, unemployed LVM may abuse to make women stay on his own level, but the wealthy/accomplished LVM may abuse to make women stay on the level he has assigned them - which is either below him so you don't outshine him, or above him because he …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 03:18 PM
3

Report ad to Reddit Report app to Google Play
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 03:10 PM
2

"circussexual" and "crowns before clowns" have absolutely made my month.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/20 08:10 PM
24

You'll potentially out anything about you that's connected to the social media account you're using. I'd set up burner accounts just for following FDS-related topics.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/20 02:58 PM
2

It's hard to establish appropriate boundaries when you're so shocked in the moment. I don't recommend going to HR about this just yet. Save the message as evidence in case you need it. Should James say or do anything else inappropriate, let him know that you want communications to stay professional and to stop the personal comments. This helps cover you if you need to escalate, and he won't be able to say he was blindsided, he didn't know you were offended, you acted like it was a compliment, et…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 02:53 PM
5

Love bombing. Makes me retch to see it now. Wish I'd been smarter about it years ago.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/20 01:57 PM
17

If you already told him not to use pet names with you, then no. Otherwise, yes, it's overreacting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/20 01:51 PM
17

r/wgtow
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/20 01:55 AM
6

YES. I have seen exactly this, multiple times, from men who had long since left their abusive homes and childhoods and had plenty of time to model the healthier behaviors they saw around them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 02:57 PM
4

Same. My choice probably wouldn't even be jewelry, but some kind of antique item.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 02:55 PM
37

Financial coverage for both parties to have their own legal counsel in the event of a separation/divorce. So that way, you're not stuck with no lawyer to advocate for you, or ending up sharing a lawyer with him, because he has earnings to hire one and you don't. Wouldn't be a bad idea for you to do your own consultation with a good prenup lawyer (preferably one who's known for advocating for wives) to find out what yoru prenup should cover, especially compared to what is/isn't covered in state l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 02:46 PM
10

If you like your bags, good for you, and I didn't downvote you. Nor would I downvote you for having designer items. Go roll your eyes elsewhere.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/20 03:53 PM
24

If they're even hers to begin with. This could be the same fake crap we see on other social media where people pose with stuff they don't even own in an attempt to look more successful than they are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/20 03:37 PM
12

No, the items are trashy. The brands aren't, but these particular items are. Screamingly obvious designer logo = trashy. Also, how much of this stuff is actually hers, vs. stuff she took pictures of herself with?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/20 03:35 PM
8

Google "Elon Musk" "Azealia Banks"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/20 02:37 PM
26

Yes! She's...kinda not always right in the head, I don't think, but that was one entertaining exchange and I believe everything she said.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/20 02:37 PM
174

"Calling me a slut, pervert. That's not how you talk to someone you care about." So close to realizing the truth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/20 02:20 PM
6

People don't want to hear about how fake porn is. It's one of the adult versions of telling kids there's no Santa Claus. And yet some of these same people know food photography is a thing and that a lot of food is doctored or faked or substituted to look good on camera, and that social media and the beauty/fitness industries are full of fakery and image manipulation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/20 03:12 PM
6

Yes, she's probably getting it from him because he's asymptomatic and keeps giving it back to her. He needs to be treated for yeast infection too, before she sleeps with him again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/20 04:15 PM
31

Good call! Relationships aren't supposed to be wars. If you have to fight for it, you've already lost.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/20 03:39 PM
15

I'm old and jaded and not convinced that there's such a thing as HVM who are both that way already and stay that way for the long run. I'm here mostly to help encourage younger women who are interested in relationships to value yourselves, value your own company, be picky and not pickmeisha, be choosy, live your high-value standards and hold your potential partners accountable for same. If it means you spend portions of your life with no partner, it is absolutely better than settling for someone…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/20 03:24 PM
22

This. BDSM pretty much centers around men getting off on abuse, whether they give it or receive it. Even a "submissive" male wants submission his way and expects the dominant to "serve" him in that fashion.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/20 02:00 PM
9

And of course he lives with his parents.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/20 03:07 PM
13

Yes, same with gaming, cosplay, etc. So many people don't seem to be able to to be a little interested in it or treat it as a hobby, it becomes their whole identity and their whole life. It's escapism and inability to function in the real world.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/20 02:57 PM
4

Yes. Same approach here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/20 02:54 PM
65

Typical niceguy behavior. I put you on a pedestal, now DISPENSE SEX.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/20 02:58 PM
6

Sending men nudes and sexy pics isn't going to stop them from looking elsewhere, just like giving them everything they want sexually isn't a guarantee they won't cheat and/or leave. Don't do it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/20 01:49 AM
15

and they go absolutely ballistic if it's done to them. "You LIED! You BROKE YOUR PROMISE!" But when they do the same thing, you're overreacting, it's not the same, they had a perfectly good reason, blah blah bye.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/20 02:29 PM
72

and he says stupidly unscientific things on topics where he has no expertise, and called a cave diving rescuer a pedo even though Musk himself has hung out at parties with, and been photographed with, Ghislaine Maxwell. Epstein claimed to be a crisis manager/adviser for Musk and Tesla. There's no way Musk didn't know about Epstein and Maxwell's reputation. Elon Musk is an excellent example of a high net worth but negative value male.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/20 02:23 PM
55

Female cats NEED to be spayed if they're not going to be bred. Otherwise they can develop a painful and fatal condition called pyometra. It's neglectful and abusive to not spay or neuter pets.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/20 02:17 PM
20

There's a reason humans invented clothing, and not just for "prudishness" or modesty. I can't be the only one who finds nudity not all that physically comfortable. Clothing provides temperature adjustments, bodily adornment, protection for cleanliness and safety, a place to keep your stuff so you're not pulling your credit cards out of your ass crack...I like clothing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/20 02:27 AM
2

That's an insult to cunts
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/20 02:59 PM
6

Learn before you munch: http://www.newnownext.com/ive-contracted-my-third-gastrointestinal-parasite-from-rimming-and-i-cant-be-the-only-gay-man-suffering/01/2018/ Someone can look/smell clean and still transmit parasites and bacteria, not just COVID-19.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/20 02:45 PM
22

Been shouting this from the rooftops for years: MEN are the reason rape of males, especially underage boys by women, isn't taken seriously. Even "South Park" had an episode pointing this out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/20 01:01 AM
7

It does, because this points toward him either figuring out his direction in life or at least wanting better than what he had. I'd want to know more about the credit card debt. I'd also want to pay attention to his current spending habits and whether he's prioritizing how he spends his money. If he treats himself (and you) here and there, that's fine. But if he has to have the latest and greatest everything while making little progress on paying down debt, that's not a good sign. It seems like h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/20 02:50 PM
69

And even if men didn't use this against you, have more respect for yourself than to post nudes, even "anonymously." The world isn't entitled to see or know everything about you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/20 03:44 PM
63

Almost 40 years old and can't manage his money like an adult, and it's not like he's been stuck in low-paying work. Avoid.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/20 03:39 PM
7

If he's always in "idk what do you wanna do?" mode and never seems to have an opinion of his own, I get how that's unattractive. I don't care for men trying to seem "alpha" or "dominant". But "has a mind of his own, and isn't fishing for my opinion just to agree with it out of neediness" is just fine.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/20 01:09 AM
12

I'm not sure there's any one field or type of work a high-value man flocks to. Best not to even think that way, because then you might be tempted to give someone benefit of the doubt because of his profession, when other things about him are red flags.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/20 03:00 PM
12

I agree with you on everything except this: He phrases his desires as questions (ie “do you think you would want to FaceTime sometime this week?”) : a HVM states his desires confidently (ie “I want to call you this week when are you free?”) There's nothing wrong with asking instead of demanding. That's basic politeness, to me. However, all the other behaviors in total add up to needy pick-me who turns controlling and possessive once he has you, and you're right to move on from this one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/20 02:48 PM
23

He'll fucking snap if he gets a domme that won't do what he says and actually tries to take real control. He's depressed because what he's getting doesn't live up to his fantasy and he wants a fantasy woman who can read his mind and dominate him HIS way - in other words, servitude.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/20 02:42 PM
16

He may be a boob-man, but she deserves a hu-man, a man who is an actual human being and sees her as a human being too. 45 years old and he acts like this? That is way more than old enough to get over the porn obsession (guaranteed he did not "just start" to watch it) and learn to deal with reality like an adult.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/20 02:37 PM
53

People who are wealthy and successful beyond a certain level strike me as being automatically low value. They may be high net worth, somewhat famous (maybe very famous), tons of assets, etc. but they didn't get there because they're fantastic human beings. They're all "American Psycho", Patrick Bateman on the inside, just a little less violent, or maybe with even more money to hide crimes and polish their public personas. My work background might be similar to yours and I've seen a lot of the sa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/20 02:31 PM
14

Never send nudes. Never keep dating anyone who asks you for nudes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/20 03:43 AM
14

If escorting were high value and oh-so-enjoyable, she'd still be doing it, not pushing makeup and heaux-coaching. She's turning her past of being used by men into a profitable way to use women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/20 03:06 PM
1

At first I wondered whether anyone over the age of 12? 13? would fall for this, and then I wondered if that's exactly what he's fishing for.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/20 02:59 PM
5

Been a long time since I watched the movie, but I remember liking Sigourney Weaver's character in "Working Girl" more than anyone else in the movie. She wasn't warm and fuzzy, but I couldn't see her as unlikeable, the way the movie wanted me to see her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/20 02:48 AM
5

Very well summed up. The one thing I'd give the guy a pass on is being irritated by the threesome comment. Nobody wants to hear that shit about themselves and their friends. But everything else is spot on. I question whether his ex is actually even his ex. I also see doing a lot of gaming as low value behavior. Last but not least, the overall relationship description just sends up red flags that I can't even name. It's an intuition thing. Something's off. Proceed carefully with this one, OP.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/04/20 02:45 PM
4

r/nametheproblem is exactly this - a sub to document male violence. I post there probably way too much, and I don't even post everything I find that could go on there. It is overwhelming at times. For every Brenda Spencer, there are so many male equivalents, I can't remember all their names. For every Aileen Wuornos, there are so many male equivalents, I can't remember their names.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/20 03:18 PM
37

They look good, just like Prince Charles and Princess Diana did. Neither couple was blissfully happy. Also, high value people don't fly planes into situations they're not ready for and jeopardize themselves and their passengers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/20 10:42 PM
3

Spending a lot of time together, and I mean a LOT of time, over the course of at least a few months, at each other's places could stand in for living together. I would never marry someone after seeing them 2-3 times a week for a few months. I'd need to see way more of their lifestyle than that, for a longer period of time. I'd also rather live with someone, realize they're not who I thought they were and the situation is going nowhere and then leave, than be married and have those same realizati…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/20 04:17 PM
1

It's not your job to make him behave, but he seems like the kind who won't take hints. Be blunt and tell him, "I'm not interested, and you shouldn't be either. Stop this." If he still won't leave you alone, then use the nuclear option and send his fiance evidence with a message like "please ask your fiance to leave me alone, he won't listen to me, maybe he'll listen to you" (and make sure evidence includes you asking him to stop). Then block them both on everything and let them deal with the fal…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/04/20 05:00 PM
19

Manchild playground bullshit. Not getting what they want = tantrum/insults
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/04/20 04:44 PM
57

This is why I'm not in favor of women being in a hurry to get exclusive, live with someone, or marry him. Voice of experience here: If he pressures you for exclusivity, living together, or marriage, get out. The sooner he locks down the relationship, the sooner he can go back to the usual LVM ways and stop pretending to be what he's not. I think it's reasonable to be in a relationship for at least a year before living together, and living together (or at least spending frequent time at each othe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/04/20 04:42 PM
45

Engineer as in software engineer? Plenty of turds in that swimming pool too. Glad you found a decent one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/04/20 04:36 PM
12

There's absolutely a correlation. What she thinks men like, that's what she'll say she likes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/04/20 04:29 PM
97

Yes! And we don't even need to devalue men to do this. Just value ourselves more.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/20 03:33 PM
16

I get "closeted, self-hating, socially awkward, larping as hypermasculine pussy destroyer" vibes from him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/20 05:35 PM
13

Apparently having standards and refusing to pity-fuck anyone is aBuSiVe!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/20 02:58 PM
18

Not looking for a relationship, freaked out about being seen on Skype and made you leave right after? I bet he has a wife or girlfriend. Either way, he doesn't want what you want. Block him on everything and move on. There are better things, and people, ahead for you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/20 02:16 AM
65

🚩🚩🚩 Red flags flapping in the wind here. He's trying to isolate you from family and friends, and the "it's you and me against the world" mindset is part of that. You're not being picky. Your intuition is telling you this situation is off, and your intuition is right. https://speakoutloud.net/intimate-partner-abuse/isolation-tactic-of-control
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/20 01:50 AM
2

I remember using Whisper when it was a new thing a few years ago, and I ditched it because it was such trash. I don't know how it still exists. Even as a new-ish app, it was full of people pushing their MLMs, trying to sell drugs, trying to buy drugs, trying to find no strings attached hookups...just gross. Sounds like it's gotten even worse since then.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/20 03:50 PM
5

If he’s already pulling away just let him. If at some point he asks to hangout/hook up just say that while enjoyed your arrangement you think it’s best you both put it behind you now and that it’s run it’s course. Be polite and kind of you see him at work. Don’t try and be friends afterwards. Move on. Best advice right there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/20 03:37 PM
18

Exactly! We can only change and control ourselves, not others, so it doesn't matter whether men co-opt these principles. Be your best self, be aware and confident, work on making good choices and learn from mistakes, don't be desperate for companionship or flattery, and then the rest tends to sort itself out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/20 03:22 PM
4

I have to ask...What's with all the emojis? I tend to associate that with multilevel marketing "huns" shilling their pyramid scheme goodies. Not saying you're an MLM hun but it's just kind of offputting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/20 03:00 PM
5

Be yourself and don't settle. A person who is high value for you will love and accept you for the sporting type you are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/20 02:54 PM
2

My guess is, he won't keep that job for long. When he quits or gets fired, it'll be everybody's fault except his.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/20 02:54 PM
14

Send her links to r/ codependency and coda.org She does need to put effort into saving someone, and that someone is herself. If she insists on sending him a book, it should be Lundy Bancroft's "Why Does He Do That?" but she needs to read it first.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/20 02:59 PM
6

I want this on a billboard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/04/20 02:52 AM
13

As someone who's not a Biden or Bernie fan, maybe I shouldn't have an opinion. But I do. I'm having a hard time with Tara Reade's accusations. These links to Twitter threads lay out some reasons why: Web archive link Another web archive link What makes me want to cry, what makes me feel broken, is that capable women were running for office and American voters could have avoided this whole mess by helping push them forward. But, no, they weren't perfect enough.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/04/20 02:43 AM
13

The problem, and the point of my post is, the boyfriend trying to "educate" his girlfriend is usually guilty of the same behavior. He's not wrong, he's just an asshole. He's sending up a red flag not only about the girlfriend's male friends, but about himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/20 01:42 AM
5

I can just hear the nasal, cracked voice and the wheeze at the end of every sentence
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/20 03:21 PM
5

Wow. He couldn't have shown his scrote-ness more clearly if he'd stapled his balls to his ears. Why ? Because they’ll do everything for him. ‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎🚩‎
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/20 03:15 PM
65

Strong/independent women are more fun to break. "Taming of the Shrew" and all that. Men like the guy you matched with are looking for a steady parking space for their dick. The sort-of-relationship they offer is the fee they're willing to pay for privileged parking rights.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/20 02:51 PM
10

BDSM is another subculture for people to feel different and special and Not Like All The Others. Kink communities are full of broken people who don't make good partners or friends, not for anything long-term. Too much outright abuse, too much mental illness. Poly communities are about as bad tbh, and I've seen so much overlap between the two. These are generally not people you can have a healthy, high value relationship with. The ones who are, or become, healthy and high value will move beyond t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/20 03:57 PM
14

Depends on the man. If he's happy with his life the way it is, why add in the complication of a relationship?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/20 03:30 PM
2

You're welcome! Happy to help women not have to learn this stuff the hard way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/20 03:26 PM
10

You did good by not going to him the minute he suggested it. If you continue to be with him, keep your boundaries and standards up. He either shit-tested you, or tried to backpedal on LVM behavior by making it sound like he was testing you, and is buttering you up by making you feel like you passed a test "he told me he wouldn’t want to be with someone that doesn’t show common sense to stay safe ie. avoid catching public transport late at night alone" It might stop there, or it might escalate to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/20 02:54 PM
25

So much this. "No nudes is good nudes" - my motto. If he wants to see YOU nude, he can do it in person, no cameras of any kind. If he wants to see a nude vid or photo, he wants a nude vid or photo, he does not care if you're the person in it. Giving him nudes will not stop him from looking at porn, looking at other women, or cheating on you. If he's going to do those things, he'll do them regardless of whether he has your nudes. Plus, you're giving him something to use against you if you piss hi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/20 04:22 AM
4

r/wgtow
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/20 09:22 PM
17

Temporarily? Maybe. Permanently? Probably not. Not unless they want the change for themselves, independently of other people, because they're tired of being the way they are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/20 08:46 PM
3

If that type of person was easy to spot and resist, there wouldn't be books about it, and there wouldn't be so many of us who'd been through it more than once. You've recognized a pattern and now you're even better equipped to protect yourself. Congrats on getting out, and here's to a better future ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/20 03:47 PM
6

If you haven't read "Why Does He Do That" by Lundy Bancroft, treat yourself. LVM doesn't begin to describe your ex. Block, move on, be glad he's out of your life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/20 03:16 PM
21

How is this even a question? No lay in the world is worth doing time for. Jailbait doesn't have magic glitter vaginas that somehow make everything more amazing. Men are so, so hung up on taboos. If you told them humping a fencepost was taboo and only the manliest men defied it and showed off the splinters on their dicks, you'd have a fence-humping, dick-splintering epidemic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/20 03:01 PM
50

Money can cloak so much abuse and overall low-value behavior. Look at fiction like "American Psycho," "Wall Street," fact like "Wolf of Wall Street," "The Big Short," etc. Look at the negative headlines about so many start-up founders and high-level people in Silicon Valley. Years ago I had the chance to work with someone who helped kids who'd been abused, particularly sexual abuse, and she said the dirtiest secret of the whole thing was how many of those kids came from wealthy homes and familie…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/20 02:51 PM
2

Yes. r/wgtow (women going their own way)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/20 02:26 PM
99

"Crabs in the pot" mentality. They'll take what you have and pull you down with them into broke-ness, and be upset if you try to lift yourself out without pushing them out first. If you push them out first, see ya! You'll be stuck in the pot. Childishness. They're shitty with money because they're basically children, with a child's sense of responsibility and empathy. Children can be taught these things. Grown men, not so much. Do you want to be his mommy or his partner?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/20 03:54 PM
131

And once you give in, it never stops. LVMs are the worst damn gold diggers in the world. What you have, even when they see it's not much, they'll take so they don't have to contribute. Call them out on it, and suddenly you're the gold digger just because you want them to have some responsibility and financial skin in the game.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/20 03:46 PM
1

That's nice, Mark, message me when you turn 21
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/20 02:25 AM
25

Male fantasy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/20 11:07 PM
32

If breasts weren't thought of as sexual body parts, he wouldn't ask to see them. It makes me sad to contemplate any woman falling for this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/20 10:27 PM
6

THIS. Please don't risk linking yourself to a loser for the rest of your life because you think you're dependent on sex. Once you stop sleeping with him, literally and figuratively, you might be surprised by how much you don't miss it. Break that last bond and go your own way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/20 04:18 PM
61

Monica Lewinsky was not sexually assaulted. She said so herself. But the relationship was an abuse of power, which she also says. The Vanity Fair piece I linked is a great read. Monica is nobody's dummy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/20 03:45 PM
104

these LVM with tanks will tell you they are the safe drivers, because they're assertive and make decisions where someone else's indecision would have spelled disaster That mindset, not just in driving but in anything, is an absolute hallmark of a LVM. It's how they excuse their childish impatience and disrespect for other people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/20 03:09 PM
4

She used licensed music in the video that was not paid for. Which is not a high-value thing to do. I'm not the biggest fan of her anyway, but she's been creating content long enough to know about the need to license material before using it. Shame about that, too...I actually liked the video and liked her choice of music.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/20 04:00 AM
21

Consider turning off chat and messaging too. On the website (apparently it doesn't work on mobile) go to User Settings, then Chat & Messaging, set "Who can send you chat requests" to Nobody, and "Who can send you private messages" to Whitelisted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/20 03:27 AM
95

I want to put this on a billboard. ...oh, who am I kidding, I'd have to buy ad space on Pornhub for them to see it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/20 03:08 AM
45

Look at how a man’s parents treat each other, and also how he treats his mom. This will likely reflect into how he treats you, so be extremely cautious. THIS. Also look at the whole family dynamic, whether there has been parental abuse, whether the man has periodic battles with and estrangements from siblings. A turbulent family history is not a good sign, because he likely grew up without learning appropriate conflict resolution skills. If he tells you he's the "black sheep" or the "scapegoat" …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/20 05:06 PM
31

That was a lot of words for him to say REEEEEEEEEE
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/02/20 11:49 PM
3

The article I linked provides better explanations. Definitely worth a read.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/02/20 03:37 AM
3

Funny you should mention that. The thread has at least 2 posters saying they have female alts they use here, and maybe other subs too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/02/20 03:35 AM
9

HSV isn't even on STD panels because it's so common. This article provides some good detail.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/02/20 02:30 AM
4

His actions feel lovebomb-y/desperate to me, and that's not a good sign. He has a schedule he's holding himself to, and he's trying to find someone to fill that slot. It's hard to tell whether he's drawn to you for YOU, or as someone who can fill in that slot on his schedule so he can stop looking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 03:13 PM
6

r/nametheproblem
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 02:17 AM
17

That could be the "stealth LVM" starter pack. - Love bombs, is attentive and courteous, behavior and appearance is on point...because he's in a one-man play and once he has you, the show ends. This could be the entire starter pack right here. If he seems like he could be a catch but is moving super fast and intensely to build closeness, look out - he's LVM, hiding or outright lying about a lot of his life, and also probably one of the types Lundy Bancroft writes about.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/20 03:30 PM
27

Truth. I don't go to school reunions, but I've seen photos over the years, and the women are easier to recognize and remember than the men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/20 03:32 AM
48

PREACH. This is your Miranda warning against nudes. You have the right to remain clothed. Anything explicit you send can and will be used against you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 02:47 PM
2

No thanks. This gives me vibes of someone who is themselves a narcissist, fishing for women he knows he can rope in because they're already identifying themselves as prone to being taken in by narcissism (otherwise why would they seek help?) If you don't mind text instead of video, here's a bunch of reading that will accomplish the same thing. From Psychology Today
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/20 03:15 PM
8

Men disengaging by become low value? Hey, I'm on board with the trash taking itself out. These men don't have much choice anyway. They can't fake high value indefinitely. Their low value will eventually show.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/20 03:51 AM
13

And keep a cork in 'em And look out for the dregs at the bottom
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/19 06:41 PM
3

Pretty sure he does that on the regular because nobody on Tinder will fuck him
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/19 06:40 PM
4

I thought it was funny too. I kept imagining Eric Cartman, or some random asthmatic neckbeard, reading it out loud like it was his magnum opus.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/19 06:35 PM
3

TRP/PUA is as much about manipulating loser men into giving up $$$$$ to learn how to get laid as it is about loser men actually getting laid. Players getting played.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/19 06:23 PM
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