TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

stripe_throwaway Archive

View 1 post and 202 comments by stripe_throwaway on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
115

stripe_throwaway/r/RedPillWomen23/08/22 07:43 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

!|Well dang it! I thought I'd doxxed you!|! Jokes aside, thanks for confirming my suspicions!
/r/RedPillWomen09/10/22 01:50 PM
1

Devil's advocate: if you are his type and he's tired of you, what's stopping him from just finding another girl who fits his type and replacing you with her? I've seen a man with a "type" do this, twice. Types are something that's generally tied to attributes of someone out of their control. Not everyone has a type, and as someone with a type myself, I absolutely branched out when I was dating and it wasn't my end all be all. Vetting for other things is a better bang for your buck imo.
/r/RedPillWomen09/10/22 01:47 PM
1

I really didn't want to go out on a limb but the few times I've gandered across the media hall over to created content, it's been someone spewing an anger-phase-esque paranoia of weirdness and left me really confused. My favorite was a podcast where this guy said he wouldn't LTR a girl unless she deleted all her socials, had a picture of them together as all her wallpapers, deleted all numbers of men who weren't family members in her phone, kept a picture of them together in her wallet, can't be…
/r/RedPillWomen09/10/22 02:19 AM
1

Gunna be honest here: unless it's like Rian Stone, and even his content is worth watching with a grain of salt, I don't think it's worth putting much investment into any videos of someone on YouTube talking on the matter and branding themselves as "RP" has to say. YouTube channels, podcasts, tictoks, and Instagram are all monetized around views. People promote products and make money one way or another off their follower base. People have been known to pander to a user base to keep the wheel goi…
/r/RedPillWomen08/10/22 04:49 PM
1

He got upset that I’d be using our clippers because if I nick her then would I need to throw them out because of the contamination (we have to wear gloves when doing her laundry and be careful of an exposure to bodily fluids). I was frustrated because he totally missed the point of this being an incredibly emotional moment for my mom and myself. I don't think this reaction is stoicism. I think it's compartmentalization. You're going through a really rough patch here, and to a limited extent, com…
/r/RedPillWomen07/10/22 03:51 PM
1

If you are uncomfortable with how fast this is physically progressing, the changing the setting where you have been meeting him might be a better way to go. Think about it. You're meeting up with a guy in his bedroom multiple times and there's only so many things to do in a small private room with just a bed and a chair.
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/22 12:14 AM
1

The Mayo Clinic Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy and Expecting Better books are science backed books.
/r/RedPillWomen05/10/22 04:12 PM
1

Maybe it's the metaphor, but this feels too argumentative for me. Whenever conflict arises, it's always been he and I vs the problem and never me vs him. In prior relationships, I feel as though my ex husband was forcing the judge and jury role on himself and I was fighting to be heard.
/r/RedPillWomen05/10/22 12:34 PM
1

My ones that stretch out are cable knit 😭😂
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/22 01:50 PM
1

I've literally never gotten insulting responses.... Yet.. and I'm a pretty confrontational person. Like pull a guy who's creeping on the bachelorette party I'm with in Nashvegas to tell him when he walks up to a group of dancing girls like that he has 3 seconds to say hi till it's creepy and he's been there not talking for 5 minutes, none of these girls are single and they're not the cheating types and they're all scared of you which isn't sexy and there's really no fixing it now so go to that o…
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/22 01:36 PM
1

So, on that note, do you have any thigh high sock recommendations? I find they're either too thin or they ride down >:|
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/22 03:35 AM
1

I left my ex husband when he was at the beginning of his journey, but I had little faith. That person had an established pattern of starting things and not finishing them. When I read in TRP that the height of a woman's attraction to a man is early on in a relationship and it could only go down from there, that resonated with me back then. I couldn't imagine ever getting back to the early infatuation days. I have no regrets in my decision, but I'll never know if he made it to the finish line I g…
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/22 03:11 AM
1

I can see that. I guess that's kinda what was awesome about asktrp. There's no way for just anyone to really observe the process. RIP. Still much rather would be around for the tail end than the in-between. 😂
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/22 02:05 AM
1

"Aw thank you, that's really charming, but I'm not interested."
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/22 01:18 AM
1

I have been known lurk quite a bit as well, I also especially enjoy the OYS threads. 😂🙌 If the primary audience was marriage-minded men (something I've seen more over in RPChristians than anything else) I'd feel different about it, but the overwhelming majority is men in unhappy marriages trying to get it together. A lot of them seem to start cheating at some point. A lot of the marriages seem to dissolve, and a lot of the bitter resentment spilling into those threads and askMRP make me feel lik…
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/22 01:14 AM
1

I'd wish he would man up and deal with his problems instead of leaving us. When he left his home country, did he build any friendships in his new one? I imagine leaving one's home country has to feel extremely alienating after a while. If you and your family are the only thing he has, it's perfectly reasonable to see why he might feel as though he has nothing to look forward to. Is there anything keeping you and your son from coming with should he go? Is that an option for you?
/r/RedPillWomen03/10/22 11:04 PM
1

If you can't trust him to respect your boundaries and you're only two months in, what other surprises could you find out about later down the road?
/r/RedPillWomen03/10/22 01:24 PM
1

😬 have you spent much time in MRP? It's not for men who want to be married, let's just put it that way.
/r/RedPillWomen03/10/22 01:18 PM
1

His following of RP should have nothing to do with a someone's vetting decision. There are good men who happen to follow TRP, and there are good men who don't happen to follow TRP. Not all good men follow RP. In fact I'd argue most RP guys aren't good men. Most men turning to RP do so after not having a good time dating, getting burned, or feeling taken advantage of. Ultimately, dating someone following TRP is a high risk - high reward strategy. It's very risky and it's not really something I'd …
/r/RedPillWomen03/10/22 01:16 PM
1

There are like 4 pairs of Cole Haans at or below $80 with a simple Google search. Nike either owns Cole Haan or they have a partnership because Nike Air inserts are frequently advertised as a feature of Cole Haan shoes. I'm not sure where you're accustomed to shopping but I almost never spend more than $50 on a pair of shoes with very few exceptions. If you were trying to make it work on $20, I could see how you might have some difficulty, but as someone who used to run around all day in the sho…
/r/RedPillWomen02/10/22 09:52 PM
1

Danskos, Cole Haan, and Clark's all run in that price range.
/r/RedPillWomen02/10/22 07:51 PM
4

Price point?
/r/RedPillWomen01/10/22 07:49 PM
30

He said he'd be ready to cohabitate in 3 years so, unless cohabitation means start a family too, it might be much longer before he's going to be in "start a family" territory. It might be worth seeking clarification unless it was something I'm misunderstanding. Ultimately you're going to have to decide which is more important: can you live without starting a family until you are older than 32? If not, then it's worth noting that you're most likely not going to change his mind.
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/22 09:50 PM

You said you never got attention until you edited your nose, but there's something to be said for being an approachable person in general. There's really attractive people who don't get approached because they carry themselves in such a way that it filters out the people they'd be interested in. It might be worth looking into ways of being more approachable in general. I understand your nose is a pain point for you and looking at the way it looks in photos doesn't appeal to you, but when your ap…
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/22 06:05 PM
21

I like you but I'm not sure about how my life will go ( he was talking about him thinking about moving abroad ) and I don't want to tie myself to a relationship, and that once you take that step, going back from there is never good and could ruin what we have? Translation: he doesn't want anything more than an ongoing casual fling with you. He may tick all your boxes but you either don't tick all his or he has no intentions of settling down any time soon. Sorry, it's time to move on.
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/22 12:17 PM
15

This is beautiful and warms my heart. You gave me tinglies thinking about some of the similar joys my captain has given me through this process. Looks like a sailor's life for us. Welcome to the sea!
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/22 12:18 AM
2

I feel that. I work from home so it's nice being able to do domestic tasks in between meetings and working but I'm still obligated to put in 40+ hours a week and I do.
/r/RedPillWomen30/09/22 12:01 AM
4

There's lots of room to have fun with it and you can say a lot about yourself without saying a lot about yourself, which is why I like it!
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/22 11:22 PM
1

Given he's a professor I just don't see much of another way unless he wants to play politics and climb in his department but it doesn't sound like that's something he's interested in, so that's the best I could come up with. I get where you're coming from though, the job market is a little wild right now.
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/22 11:14 PM
1

If she's not working an hourly job without any benefits that's not really possible.
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/22 11:11 PM
36

Try 3 2 1. This is the formula I used to meet my husband! 3 things about yourself, 2 things about the person you're looking for, and 1 thing you can do together. Edit: example: I'm a nerdy cat lover with an antique obsession. You love bicycling and don't mind being my recipe guinea pig. Let's go get caffeinated and bounce off the walls at the trampoline park. ;)
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/22 10:36 PM
1

It sounds like you're bringing in a decent amount of money on your own. Unless you're in a HCOL area, it sounds like there should be room to be able to lasso your spending down A LOT. Have you asked him what he thinks about looking into passive income streams? At your income level, you should be able to pull enough capital for a side gig or something. It could be something you both do together too, which is a fun adventure. The nice part of it is you're no longer bound by your W2 income and depe…
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/22 09:45 PM
6

So... I have learned this over the years. When wearing glasses I can't do my makeup the same way I'd do it if I was wearing contacts. Not just for eyesight reasons but aesthetic purposes too. I basically have to play down the eyeshadow a lot and play up the blush more and wear a bolder lip stain. (I typically go bare lips or with a very light lip gloss) Think sexy librarian/secretary. I also typically wear more bronzy blushes with contacts but more pinky like Nars Orgasm work better on me when I…
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/22 06:31 PM
8

The wet ones hand wipes and hand sanitizer. If you throw a few drops of contact lens solution on your hands after that and wipe with a paper towel or something they're usually sufficiently clean. This is dating me, but there was a time when we had to rub the contact lens solution into the lenses themselves because it was cleaning the lenses. It's been reformulated to not need to do that over the years. My first optometrist always told me to kinda wash my hands with the solution before doing the …
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/22 04:50 PM
22

I buy Mylar ziplock bags and pre-saturate all my skincare on Japanese cotton pads when traveling so I can clean my hands and take a cotton pad with product already on it and use it on my face. I bring chemical exfoliant and various moisturizers so I use a sharpie to mark which is which and that works quite well. I also have Wet ones hand wipes and hand sanitizer for when I'm on a long haul flight and want to remove my contacts to sleep on a plane. The tropical scent is a vacation.
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/22 04:35 PM
14

Bravo. This is great in social situations, but it shines most in situations where actual shit hits the fan. The more this gets mastered in when it's not serious, the easier it will be to give her no choice but to calm the fuck down in the event of an actual crisis so you can get shit done.
/r/TheRedPill29/09/22 03:17 PM
1

It's a pretty good strategy on multiple fronts. It keeps you in his mind and gives him something to look forward to when he comes home.
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/22 09:35 PM
19

Tattoos are incredibly subjective. High quality artwork with an interesting or well-designed subject matter or something which was clearly planned over a long period of time with a back story or something? It becomes a personal preference when the tattoos are in this category. Shoddy work, something blatantly spontaneous, face tattoos, names of former significant others, something vulgar/explicit or anything declaring political/controversial belief systems? Maybe red flag territory. That's kind …
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/22 02:58 PM
28

His actions won't dissuade the right buyer, but they will result in the right buyer possibly issuing an eviction notice if they feel the tenant occupying their newly purchased property is a danger to its valuation. Investment companies will purchase a rundown property, fix it up, and rent it out until they can get a better valuation from the bank and utilize that new equity to reinvest in new properties. So many people looking at investment properties would love to have a place with an awesome t…
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/22 11:15 PM
7

Is he anybody in your offmychest post from two years ago?
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/22 11:06 PM
3

She is slick. You're still her doormat.
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/22 10:39 PM
6

I cancelled a trip last week with zero consequences since companies are still making exceptions for COVID. You're making every excuse in the book to keep someone in your life who adds little value and is disrespectful. You teach people how to treat you, and you've taught us you're willing to let someone walk all over you, have their cake, and eat it too for at least a year, and they're going to get a vacation out of it too. Quit hanging onto her, she doesn't love you the way you want someone to …
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/22 10:36 PM
2

Go take your bro and hit on chicks together then.
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/22 10:27 PM
5

Do it now. There's never a good time. Have some self respect.
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/22 10:24 PM
6

You've been hmming and hahing on this for a year-ish now, by the looks of your posts. Rip off the band-aid.
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/22 10:08 PM
58

How long has this relationship gone on? Who is paying rent? What triggered the move? Right now it sounds like you have a large liability: a property with your name and credit score attached to it and someone who could be potentially violating a tenancy agreement occupying the property. Are these the actions of someone deserving of your trust, admiration, and respect?
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/22 09:57 PM
4

"if we don't try to have a baby by x date, I'm leaving" is literally "the baby ultimatum."
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/22 02:10 PM
2

The wording doesn't really matter. "If we don't do x by x, I'm leaving." is an ultimatum, no matter how kindly the words are arranged. The subject (fertility) isn't an exceptions clause to this either. Him not keeping his word wasn't brought up in the original post, but it still doesn't change the fact that an ultimatum was used and it still doesn't deem the situation appropriate for this type of tactic. There's nothing wrong with enforcing boundaries, which in this case would be wording things …
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/22 10:41 AM
1

Think about what "I can't do it anymore" says: "I can't go on in my life without x." It's the root of the problem. It's communicating a need. It's truthful. It's not placing unfair expectations on the other person. Think about what an ultimatum says: "Do it, or else." It's not the ultimatum itself that is the problem. It's the consequences of this action. The action itself is an attempt to change someone when we all understand we can't change others. I can hardly see how a healthy relationship w…
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/22 04:27 AM
1

An ultimatum is never okay unless it's an extremely serious situation like substance abuse. There's nothing wrong with genuinely saying you're at your wit's end and you can't take do it anymore and there's a values mismatch and walking right then and there. That's not an ultimatum. It's the truth. It's vulnerable. It's bringing him your problem. When you put an ultimatum, this is putting you in the driver's seat and pulling the relationship into uncharted territory. It's an attempt at trying to …
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/22 03:10 AM
0

To be completely honest, him walking back the timeline is an extremely important detail.
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/22 02:46 AM
1

There's ways to proceed in these situations without issuing ultimatums and without being undermining early on, but that's neither here nor there anymore. I asked what felt like stupid questions because this sticks out to me: He was okay with those discussions when lighthearted, but when it came down to set a date, he would refuse. Men exhibit this type of behavior when they know you won't be able to accept what they have to say about the subject you're talking about. This is also a sign that you…
/r/RedPillWomen26/09/22 09:56 PM
1

When did this come up? Before marriage? Did you establish timelines for the long term early on?
/r/RedPillWomen26/09/22 09:08 PM
1

You talk about your wants, goals, and desires. What are his? Does he want a family?
/r/RedPillWomen26/09/22 08:51 PM
7

Stuff that I've turned to over the years: Once a Month Meal Method Once a Week Meal Prep Plans Sheet Pan Dinners One Pan Dinners Instant pot dishes Occasionally I'll grab a deal off the mealkit subreddit. Everyplate is very kid friendly, but I liked Gobble and Hellofresh more. A couple of them had flawed instructions (adding balsamic vinegar and honey to a searing pan with nothing else? No thanks!) But overall I developed a new appreciation for some sauce and spice mixes! Edit: Cleaning stuff: T…
/r/RedPillWomen26/09/22 04:23 AM
3

I'm curious about the choice to say "RPW are made." I may be misremembering, but I recall the saying "Men are forged/made, women are born" as a recurring theme in TRP writings. I may be stewing in the solipsism of my own life experiences, but I have a hard time figuring out if I was ever "made," then again, I also have a hard time claiming I'd ever be "RPW.™" While I adopted a particular dating methodology which I credit helping me get there, I still often feel like I tripped, fell, and happened…
/r/RedPillWomen25/09/22 11:31 PM
12

I wrote that article. I've applied this in real life more times than I care to admit. If you are on top of your girl game, The methods still apply regardless of the initiator. He can't be changed. We can only change ourselves. If he's developed a wandering eye, then it's time to manage the situation in a manner which doesn't promote his continuation of the behavior, (IE positive redirection instead of being controlling because that will just drive him away and make him do it more), introspect on…
/r/RedPillWomen25/09/22 03:51 PM
29

Jealousy creates a forbidden fruit. Don't indulge in controlling behavior. It makes the forbidden fruit sweeter. Instead, tell him she's cute and ask him when the wedding is. Flirt voraciously. Demand an invite to the wedding. Redirect the attention to you, but in a positive way.
/r/RedPillWomen25/09/22 03:03 PM
1

Should a woman have to deal with this kind of mistreatment for the sake of getting married and having a family? No, but now that you've established a pattern of having multiple relationships go this direction, it's worth checking into therapy and hashing out what went wrong. It's possible you got two bad guys who were complete duds. If that's the case, it's heavily advisable to work on figuring out how to vet men and identify red flags. It's also possible you might be difficult to be in a relati…
/r/RedPillWomen24/09/22 01:29 PM
7

Great to hear about the classes! Curious, do you ever feel like you're two different people between work and home? I've met a few lady execs outside of their work environments and I've interacted with some in a work environment but I've never seen anyone in both and I've always wondered.
/r/RedPillWomen24/09/22 11:00 AM
1

If you fit in his life and make it easy for him to make time and he is genuinely interested, then he will make time. I used to "accidentally" make too much dinner and ask my husband if he wanted some when we first started dating and he was incredibly busy all the time. I just happened to have a gym around the block and I got guest passes for free. "Oh no I made too much dinner! Wanna use my gym membership and eat my food? Oh you need to do laundry? You can do it here!"
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/22 08:51 PM
2

Honestly, working on communication skills might be a good idea too. She feels like nobody is understanding her, and that's an opportunity to assess her communication style and see how it could be conflicting with the population in general.
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/22 05:45 PM
7

Sounds like you've got everything all figured out. Good luck with everything.
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/22 03:41 PM
1

OP, you're so combative and aggressive in this thread. You seem to convey a sense that you already know everything. You may be an 8/10 in looks, but you lack receptiveness to new ideas or ability to look in the mirror and be honest with yourself. You say you're humble. Your comments clearly demonstrate otherwise. It's possible for it to happen, but until you drop your arrogance and stop thinking about yourself as better than other people, you will continue to struggle with this for a long time. …
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/22 03:25 PM
10

You don't want the people interested in you, and the people you want don't seem interested, correct?
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/22 02:46 PM
1

Now, that I'm on the dating market, I find that men like blue collar men initially seem highly interested, then lose interest and next thing, I find out they're dating women that I don't consider to be significantly better than me. It's been disheartening. I dress feminine, I consider myself an 8/10, size 4, slim, humble, funny. I don't have kids and never married. Reality Check: You're meeting the bare minimum, but there's tons of other women who meet the bare minimum. You're either throwing re…
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/22 12:53 PM
1

Sounds like a values mismatch. This doesn't go away.
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/22 12:37 PM
1

Disposable or not, it's still hypergamy and branch swinging. Get out of the weeds. This is hamstering level 9000.
/r/TheRedPill23/09/22 05:50 AM
1

Has your fiance confronted his parents about his feelings regarding this?
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/22 05:27 AM
12

You're honestly going to be the only person who can answer these questions for you. Infidelity is a tricky thing and adding long distance into the mix complicates things further. Some people move on. It seems like most don't. What he revealed to you about not passing his exam and wanting something "easy" revealed things about his character. You're going to have to figure out if you are able to trust and respect him going forward.
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/22 10:37 PM
1

What do you want to do?
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/22 09:49 PM
1

When is the earliest you won't have to be long distance anymore?
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/22 09:23 PM
21

I'm talking about your attraction towards him.
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/22 05:40 PM
12

You can't negotiate attraction. When the infatuation stage fades, there needs to be something to keep it going.
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/22 05:14 PM
48

This isn't a practice relationship, it's a relationship. If she engages in this behavior, it's because she knows she's not enough of a 'keeper' to get the man she wants so she settles for someone who will put up with her shit until she adopts the perception she can get better. Congratulations. You described textbook branch swinging and hypergamy to a T.
/r/TheRedPill22/09/22 03:32 PM
1

Let's not absolve a friend's husband of all agency here. It takes two to tango.
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/22 12:01 AM
1

She's doing the best she can with what she's got. If she knew better, she would have done better. Right now she's facing an opportunity to learn and grow. Are we here to hinder growth or foster it?
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/22 11:53 PM
1

Yup it's in there.
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/22 11:39 PM
1

"Anything?" my penis asked. I'm dying 🤣 This was an awesome piece. I can't wait to bequeath him on a quest sometime!
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/22 11:35 PM
1

Spoiler alert: |someone who cheats on his wife with you isn't exactly marriage material.| If you are not attracting the people you are attracted to, then maybe it's time to look a good hard look in the mirror and think about your actions, how you carry yourself, and how you go about dating, because that all plays a huge hand in who you attract. If you're only attracting "f boys" then it sounds like you might be intentionally or unintentionally marketing the things "f boys" want.
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/22 11:23 PM
1

See, that's the beauty of it, when you find yourself with someone you can respect, admire, and trust fully, there's never a need to slap him around.
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/22 01:26 PM
1

If you've ever been on the back of a motorcycle, it's actually dangerous for the rider to counterbalance against the driver, so shit driver or not, it's more dangerous to try to correct because the driver then has to accommodate your over-correcting with their own. Recipe for disaster. As for your actual question on how this works in a relationship, it's a perfect analogy. You find someone you can trust with your life who is going in a direction you want to go in life and you go about it togethe…
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/22 01:14 PM
1

OMG this reminds me of the first time my dad had me ride on the back of his motorcycle and I'm crying now.
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/22 01:04 PM
3

Honestly it's going to be one of the best things she can do. Those groups throw events and have all sorts of resources to help with everything. It's a huge help to have someone to text "Hey are you puking a lot" and have someone on the other side going "OMG YES IT NEEDS TO STOP!" Nobody will understand what she's going through like people in those groups would.
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/22 12:52 PM
17

I don't think moving her in will make it better. It will stress you out worse. Is she tracking her side effects anywhere? Sometimes with chemo, the side effects are a little unpredictable and there ends up being a trail of meds that follows to chase the side effects down. Has she been connected with a therapist? Facing your own mortality is a huge mindfuck, for lack of better terms and if there's a time for a therapist, it's this time. This is an attack on her life and her femininity. Everyone h…
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/22 12:43 PM
1

I think you're lost.
/r/RedPillWives19/09/22 10:53 PM
3

Might have been the wording that threw me off. It feels as though you were conveying the decision to reject was born in neuroticism, not rejection as a reaction to being approached by someone she's not attracted to. The paragraph I quoted feels as though it's arguing the former. Good shit. Liked the hot soup.
/r/TheRedPill19/09/22 08:43 PM
0

The deepest, darkest secret about game, and something most men do not understand, is that women often reject men not because of a lack of attraction, but because of their neuroticism. In other words, women often do not reject you because they do not like you, but because they are afraid you will reject them. Women are extremely insecure (insecure just means the fear of being rejected by the tribe), so women assume they are rejected by default constantly interpret little things men do as rejectio…
/r/TheRedPill19/09/22 08:35 PM
25

Have you given "How to Win Friends and Influence People" a read? I know this sounds like a non-answer but there's great conversation tips in there!
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/22 03:42 PM
54

Honestly, talking about sex is the best way. My favorite time is immediately after sex and to start something small, like: "It was so hot when you nibbled on my ear." See where that goes. After doing something like that every single time, you'll eventually get a conversation about it.
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/22 02:44 PM
1

I mean really, it is. If you are complaining about a two hour rideshare then truly it would serve you better to keep it to your own metro area.
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/22 03:38 AM
1

Then don't be in a long distance relationship?
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/22 03:35 AM
1

How long has this "long distance relationship" gone on? How often do you meet? Is the only complaint that he doesn't foot the bill or do lavish things? You haven't mentioned anything you're bringing to the table. You're both students and student life is expensive enough as it is and it doesn't seem like either of you is on the same page about the financial logistics of your meetings. No offense, but it sounds pretty entitled to be expecting someone to pay for your every single dinner like that. …
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/22 03:25 AM
17

You're a 9 but nobody will want a 9 at 24-25 years old? Who are you trying to marry? Leonardo DiCaprio?
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/22 03:17 AM
5

I'm quite sure it doesn't change anything in your mind because you remind me of me in many ways and if you're anything like me, you're stubborn as an ox. :P Have you read any of the literature this sub promotes?
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/22 06:30 PM
1

It's not just words. They are words that essentially say "You have potential I guess but if you __ then ___" This is negotiating with potential. The thing about potential, is it's really a code word for "hope." They're both things which aren't real. Like "fixable." It's a sign you wish he was someone else but with his face and body. Even if they're tiny little minor things. It's like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. The only way it fits in is if you tear the corners away and you wil…
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/22 06:17 PM
1

Someone who wants to commit to you isn't going to say "hmm maybe in three years but I need to make sure you can behave first." It's either "Fuck yes!" or "fuck no." Anything less than "fuck yes!" = "Fuck no."
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/22 04:56 PM
1

INFO: this post says a lot without saying much of anything. Have you made sure this confirms to the posting guidelines? Additionally, your post history is all over the place. Two weeks ago you wanted to break up. A month ago you wanted to break up. You keep disqualifying yourself from the relationship in various ways throughout your other posts. If it's the same relationship you posted about almost a year ago, it sounded like you wanted to break up then too. Are you sure of what you want?
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/22 04:33 PM
1

To be fair, she'd take the range rover to work but it always seems to be in the shop since a Range Rover is a shitbox car in its own right. 🤪
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/22 10:44 PM
10

It is a polarizing word, right? But in the end, that's what it starts boiling down to.
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/22 06:07 PM
17

Sure! OP's SO is thinking big picture. We as women tend to get mixed up with the little day-to-day details. We as outsiders to the situation don't know what he's studying for. If he was like a med school or law school student or something, he literally won't have time for much else. Regular physical activity is good for maintaining your brain during periods of intense studying and podcasts can be intellectually stimulating in a varied way. He's introverted but seems to be engaged in growth minds…
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/22 05:26 PM
25

If he wants to make a change, he will make a change himself. This is diagnosing a problem on his behalf and trying to solve it, which could be subverting him.
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/22 04:35 PM
9

I feel like I just took a Meyers Briggs Test. 🤣
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/22 03:24 PM
36

Has he expressed concern about burning out to you? If not, this is not your cross to bear.
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/22 02:41 PM
19

He then said he had felt trapped in the relationship because he didn’t want to break up with me for fear that I’d commit suicide because I indeed was suicidal. It might be best for you to pursue ongoing professional help for your childhood issues if they have affected your relationship in this way. If someone is telling you they feel trapped, something has gone very wrong. OP, there's a lot of comments about his behavior, but very little about what you may have done to attribute to it, which is …
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/22 12:09 PM
1

Maybe the r/alttrp has something for you but honestly we don't see much demand for this here and I'm not sure if there will be enough to hammer out what this dynamic would look like. We don't often attract people in this bucket. I feel like it would be disingenuous for us to make an attempt when the average dynamic here lacks the fluidity it sounds like yours will have. I do know a lot of relationships end up circulating around communication and that's probably going to be a very big theme for t…
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/22 11:17 AM
1

If one of you isn't willing to take on a more masculine/dominant role and the other isn't willing to take on a more feminine/submissive role it would be hard to apply a lot of things here tbh. It's not out of a lack of inclusivity, it's just that the tools and the language are so very much entangled in the balance between those a dominant/submissive relationship dynamic and we have a hard time trying to detach the connotation of feminine/submissive being associated with passivity as it is.
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/22 10:59 AM
1

I think there's an LGBT redpill sub somewhere but I can't remember the name off the top of my head. If you are a woman in a relationship with a woman, then this praxeology would require someone to be submitting to someone. That person would need to take on a "feminine role." We've had trans women come through before, but it's difficult. The two I ran into were still discovering their identity as a woman and had a hard time even finding opportunities to apply this stuff, and slowly dropped off th…
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/22 10:42 AM
9

Honestly it's not anyone's responsibility to tell someone why it's not working out and half the time when I've tried to do the honest or courteous thing it invited the other person to become defensive or negotiate why I'm wrong about wanting to split. Nobody should have to justify breaking up in the very early stages. If it's not working out, it is not working out.
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/22 09:02 PM
6

This is something you need to ask yourself. If you take issue with this and it goes against your values, don't accept this arrangement and move on. This isn't an easy path to take. You're going to have to think about what's more important to you, having him, or having someone who is willing to be monogamous. The fact you're considering this even, is telling me you're either lacking in self esteem or dealing with someone of a certain caliber. Out of respect for the people here who have gone this …
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/22 03:56 PM
1

The Chinese word for good is drawn by writing the word for woman and child together. Of course this is good. In a perfect world where only people who want kids have kids and in a perfect world where people don't die or end up having their own afflictions, then there would be no better bond than kid and mom. We don't live in a perfect world though. It feels almost like an insult to children to say no other possibility other than the attachment of their biological mom will ever be good or a positi…
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/22 03:48 PM
5

There's a lot of crazy test culture outside of the western world. IIRC I think there's the ENEM in Brazil and I think you can only take it twice. If you fail a second time, sorry, no college for you. If it's not that one, then it's some test in Russia or something. I can't remember. This kind of thing does exist though.
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/22 01:26 AM
1

Help me understand how this bars the writer from including other dynamics which exist.
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/22 03:20 PM
23

Are you seeing someone about your anxiety?
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/22 03:05 PM
10

You can't negotiate attraction, so if you decide to go that route, it might be worth noting a lack of attraction could cause issues.
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/22 03:04 PM
3

I'm honestly not sure what the problem is here. Class was never brought into the excerpt you shared. Sorry, I just don't see what there is to be offended about.
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/22 03:01 PM
1

I think it's pretty safe to say the excerpt was trying to be more exhaustive of the many dynamics which can happen.
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/22 02:53 PM
1

I honestly thought it was fiction until I met a charming guy when I was fresh out of high school and he was just telling me how much he didn't know his parents and he was only home for a month out of the year growing up because they send him off to summer camp. Once he went to some prestigious big name school, they realized there's no summer camp and that was the only reason he was home that summer. Apparently the plan was to send him to study abroad for his sophomore and junior summers. He was …
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/22 02:42 PM
1

While your experience and feelings are valid, there's a chunk of children raised in upper middle class to upper class environments where the person who singlehandedly does the majority of raising a couples' children is a hired worker in their home, until they go to boarding school. They grow up not knowing their parents all that well. It's literally a movie trope but I dated a couple of people from these backgrounds at one point in time.
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/22 01:57 PM
1

Do you see any of that in the post you wrote?
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/22 12:55 AM
37

We were supposed to brigade? What would that even look like, ladies baking pie?
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/22 11:32 PM
17

Stop drinking or learn your limits. It sounds like you're taking that step. Do EQ exercises regularly and make it a daily habit.
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/22 04:06 PM
1

If he was asked to make a list of complaints about you, what do you think he would say?
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/22 02:46 PM
1

I see you posted this in three places. Have you read our sidebar and the suggested literature? If not, start there. You two married each other for a reason at some point, right? What on your side changed since then? If he's acting distant and not listening to you, then are you doing something too much or nagging him or miscommunicating? What has changed in your communication dynamic? If he's not interested in being intimate, then what changed there? Were there bodily changes? Are you keeping up …
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/22 11:31 AM
2

What if, then, a black person chose to become a slave for a white person. I'm sorry what?
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/22 10:48 PM
1

You can't procure marital commitment from him. He is the gatekeeper of it and it must be earned. If he's not the one initiating these conversations with you and sharing his timeline out of his own accord then you're probably not inspiring commitment from him. Do you know his mission? Are you supporting his mission? How are you bringing value? What are you bringing to the table? How is that different from anyone on the market right now? The answer to these might give you an action plan. The ADHD …
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/22 06:41 PM
3

I agree. I think this feminism experiment is worth seeing through and it's not without bumps and growing pains. There's a "my way or fuck you" mentality right now and a lack of willingness to exit an echo chamber. It's the part I don't think I agree with. Feminism feels like it is at this toddler stage where tantrums are eminent and we live in an age where socially risky behaviors such as vicious outrage are not just suddenly risk averse, but socially rewarded with internet points like a little …
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/22 05:36 PM
28

I believe in feminism as a right to choose. I chose a path forward which works for me. Other women chose a different or similar route. Some women want casual relationships. Some want serious relationships and marriage. Some want kids. Some don't want kids. Some want to stay at home. Some want to #girlboss. Some want something in between. Whether or not they're happy or are successful in obtaining their choices? Not much of my concern. Since they get to choose, they can change their path to make …
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/22 04:41 PM
5

If it's not already saturated in your area, eyebrow micro needling is very lucrative right now.
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/22 01:51 PM
6

I do the accent thing and it's completely unintentional. It's a bigger part of human nature than you think, and no, it's not a trp thing. It's actually a sign of empathy, so you got yourself a husband with some awesome traits. :)
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/22 12:13 PM
13

What's going on during these weekly meets? Are you both still sexually active? Your second paragraph is extremely telling, and this weekly seeing each other for several months thing..... This isn't going anywhere and it's preventing you from removing the goggles and reassessing things. He's told you what your relationship is now. Listen. There's a very low chance it will ever go back to what it was before, and trying to get that back might be completely fruitless. Quietly move on and stop initia…
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/22 11:38 AM
10

I solemnly swear I will use these powers for no good 😜
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/22 12:19 AM
16

u/pearlsandstilettos, I have star power right? I think this deserves a star.
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/22 12:16 AM
39

As much as you think it's helpful, stop trying to armchair diagnose your husband. This could be undermining and sabotaging the relationship further. So much of this post is focused on your husband and your perception of him, but none of it really addresses anything on your side which may be influencing his behaviors. The commentors can say all day long that your husband should stop doing x or should be doing y or that you need to tell him to z but he's not here to talk to. You are. You can't cha…
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/22 12:14 AM
1

when he told me about it I was so upset. And I can't get past that enough to be able to talk through it with him without feeling resentment and anger. This, believe it or not, is an intervention, and sounds very much like an unwillingness to let go of control. We can't control other people. We can only control ourselves. we've talked about his organisation skills a million times. And it effects me so much when he messes up. It's effected my own career/business because he is not organised enough.…
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/22 03:47 PM
2

What are the other red flags?
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/22 01:35 PM
12

I think the situation you're dealing with might be outside the scope of what this subreddit could give effective advice for. I know that's not what you want to hear, but a professional might have better tools for you to reach for than us.
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/22 01:22 PM
1

Wow way to go deleting the post
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/22 03:52 AM
2

No you should not. There's other things that could be problematic but I don't have enough info to make that call.
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/22 03:27 AM
2

He was upfront how he didn't like I was fat (although he is fat), but he was fine since I was working on it. I lost weight, and I start caring about my appearance more but... he don't seem to think I am pretty at all, You can't change him and you can't make him give you the words you seem to need in order to feel pretty. You can only change yourself and there are three behaviors above which are contributing to your mindset about this situation. The above still stands even if you were losing weig…
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/22 03:21 AM
1

So you lost weight and started working on your appearance and he's not complimenting you? From the sounds of what you've written, it seems like your only motivation for losing weight and working on your appearance was his approval. This is very codependent behavior. This is very problematic for several reasons: 1.) It's outcome reliance. There's 10,000 reasons to get to a healthy weight, but doing it so other people will compliment you should be nowhere near the top. When you do things expecting…
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/22 03:07 AM
1

Think of the consequences of mistakes as tuition for a lesson learned. Shifting your mindset about mistakes might help change your mindset about the mistakes he's made. He's got to be in a position to learn from his own mistakes. Sometimes the best way to learn is unfortunately the hard way. If you find yourself constantly intervening, maybe it's time to take a step back. You could be inhibiting his growth. If he's repeating the same mistakes over and over again and you're intervening every time…
/r/RedPillWomen10/09/22 11:52 PM
4

First, give yourself a break. You've got a lot on your plate. If it's financially an option, especially with the emotional piece, it might be worth looking into therapy. I know it helped me a lot in a similar situation with my mom. Otherwise most of this seems like time management type tasks. A good calendar system or checklist system, maybe even a bujo could help manage all the little things. A lot of people use Bullet Journals for artistic expression, but in their simplest form, they're a real…
/r/RedPillWomen10/09/22 08:08 PM
3

Is there any objection to meal prepping? Depending on how you go about it, you can only be cooking a few days a week.
/r/RedPillWomen10/09/22 01:12 PM
9

Yeah this is a scenario which went through my head too. Maybe he wanted a hookup. Maybe he wanted to see if he could FWB. Maybe he just wanted to swing on a hammock with someone who doesn't know anything about the relationship he just left for a couple hours. Maybe he was interested and no longer is. There's a million possibilities.
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/22 02:17 PM
2

That's something we could probably sit here and make a million guesses about but only he knows the answer, and it kinda sucks to not have that closure, right? I think the most important thing however, is he told you his intentions about not wanting a relationship, and if that's what you want, then it looks like there's a values mismatch there.
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/22 02:12 PM
48

He said he’d like to get to know me and has always thought I was nice and cute (his words) but he’s still healing from his previous relationship and doesn’t want to immediately hop into another relationship. This is really the most important part of what you've said. He's not looking for a relationship. He's told you his intentions.
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/22 02:02 PM
1

That's what makes it hard too right? We have an age of digital media and people expressing things online they might not express out in society with other people. How much of this is people hiding their feelings because it would be socially unacceptable to reveal those things until recently, and history was very easily revised. I vaguely remember reading somewhere about how a lot of the more unsavory bits about Ancient Greek Culture may have been politely glazed over by religious institutions. Wh…
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/22 01:58 PM
1

Ooh maybe my reading comprehension was off that day. 🤣 For some reason I was spinning in circles. I feel like my original comment still applies to my feelings when I put it that way too. I guess I must have trouble separating it. If anything maybe it was viewed from a different angle. You know crazy things like chastity belts and those stories of fathers keeping their daughters completely separate from any man ever because they're worried her self control around a man would be weak? Those come t…
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/22 01:09 PM
1

I took exception to your edited posts in dead bedrooms.
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/22 01:43 AM
1

This is unhinged? Hey there... I just read the shit out of your post history on unditt. See, when I see someone with your post history I can only assume you're not responding to me in good faith. Normally I don't do this, but on the off chance you were asking in good faith... What I read in your post history drew a lot of parallels with my life. I went through a similar gauntlet with my ex-husband, except I had not one, but TWO therapists telling me the behavior he exhibited was troubling and th…
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/22 01:29 AM
1

You're right. He won, and wow, you're right again. He actually was the prize I brought home from the state fair. I guess he and I both win. :)
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/22 12:19 AM
12

Maybe go into nun mode for a little while and once ready to date again, focus on dating someone in your metro area. It sounds like there are some flags which were overlooked and would have been easier to spot if this was someone being physically nearby in their natural habitat for extended periods of time.
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/22 04:03 PM
9

What has he said to you about his opinion on getting married again?
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/22 03:55 PM
19

Don't overthink it.
/r/RedPillWomen07/09/22 11:38 PM
12

Some tricks I've found useful: The Pomodoro method. The idea is to study for x minutes and then take an x minute break. During the break, spend 5 minutes cleaning/laundry/beauty stuff / take a break and whatnot. Keep beauty stuff near the studying/work area. A lot of things like skincare or nail polish needs time to do its magic so doing it during the Pomodoro break helps make time for those sorts of things Cook on days off or only every few days but intentionally make several servings to portio…
/r/RedPillWomen07/09/22 04:02 PM
1

ORIGINAL TEXT Should I move forward with this or block him? Edit: thank you everyone for your insights. I have more clarity now that I placed my emotions aside. It seems like every community rejects this talking phase so I’ll deal with this on my own and continue to read through the sub :). This info is very personal to me, thus I why I use a throwaway, so I’ll delete the post eventually! Long story short he hasn’t reached out at all since I but dialed him. I don’t have many friends I trust to o…
/r/RedPillWomen07/09/22 01:49 PM
1

I'm sorry I think you lost me here.
/r/RedPillWomen07/09/22 01:13 PM
1

I'm not offended in the slightest. I'm being objective about what you've communicated in your post history. If I wanted to learn how to drive a car, I wouldn't ask a bicyclist.
/r/RedPillWomen07/09/22 04:26 AM
1

You've spent a lot of time in two very different subreddits trying to convince them your relationship fits their two very different relationship styles.
/r/RedPillWomen07/09/22 04:05 AM
1

I crossed it out and edited my original comment to you. I don't think you are going to get advice applicable to your relationship here.
/r/RedPillWomen07/09/22 12:57 AM
4

I feel like it has less to do with freedom and power dynamics, and more to do with purpose. Men who have a purpose tend to structure their lives to work towards their purpose. If their purpose includes a family and children, the most suitable option is someone who actively supports his pursuit of this purpose and doesn't impede or stand in the way. Masculine men have no issue communicating the boundaries and needs involved with obtaining this goal. Additionally, a person with concise goals and d…
/r/RedPillWomen07/09/22 12:56 AM
1

This post reminds me so much of this post about the mental load. Keeping score in the way OP described in the post is definitely harmful to relationships, but keeping a positive score and expressing gratitude is a really fun activity.
/r/RedPillWomen06/09/22 07:14 PM
11

There's a post called "the art of the bad excuse" here. I couldn't be nearly as eloquent as the OP of that post.
/r/RedPillWomen06/09/22 03:16 PM
8

Oh! There's a post called "the art of the bad excuse" here. I couldn't be nearly as eloquent as the OP of that post. Or you can be direct ;)
/r/RedPillWomen06/09/22 02:25 AM
11

That sounds awful and very stressful. I'm so sorry you lost your baby. That all must have been traumatic. Thing is, if you're noticing there's a pattern of unhealthy behavior coming from the men you're choosing as romantic partners, being alone for a while might help you reassess everything. With time, it becomes easier to separate yourself from the situation and think critically about any red flags you may have missed or if you're exhibiting behaviors which attract these kinds of people. Additi…
/r/RedPillWomen06/09/22 02:17 AM
1

Incremental Reciprocation is your friend.
/r/RedPillWomen06/09/22 02:05 AM
1

To be honest, I couldn't tell you. I know you wrote a lot but there's not a lot to go off of to be able to answer those questions. I don't know what value you've demonstrated you can bring to the table or how long your perceived courtship has gone on. The major takeaway from your post though, however, is there's a lot of talk and carrot dangling but no action. By the discrepancies between his social media interests and the interests he's expressed to you on a personal level, it also seems appare…
/r/RedPillWomen06/09/22 01:57 AM
1

Unfortunately, it doesn't sound like he's that into you.
/r/RedPillWomen06/09/22 01:47 AM
1

I was reading your mice utopia link and it's extremely fascinating. I'm glad you had comparisons to draw because when you brought it up I was very curious whether or not similar themes are popping up in Japan and our society.
/r/RedPillWomen04/09/22 06:22 PM
23

by changing the way you look at the entire situation Additionally.... He cheated... One month into your relationship? And you had sex with him for the first time after he cheated and then had an on-again-off-again thing for 9 months? Are you sure you both were on the same page about the relationship being exclusive? It's neither here nor there because you said you broke up, but neither of these people seem like they're worth your time and he told you who he is very early on. When people tell you…
/r/RedPillWomen04/09/22 03:58 PM
1

I see what you're saying but I worry there's a bit of confirmation bias in there and I'm not convinced this is anything groundbreaking or worth editing the content that's already there. Back in the day when loyal feminine women abounded, saying "woman" would simply be synonymous with saying "loyal feminine woman". However, we are seeing the fallout of what happens when there are no loyal feminine women for men to chase after: they withdraw completely, not just from the relationship market, but f…
/r/RedPillWomen04/09/22 01:57 PM
21

You've met one person in the flesh. You know he's real, and you've been able to vet his actions in person. When dealing with an internet persona, even with phone calls, there's a lot of negative space for the imagination to fill in the gaps, and when meeting the person behind the persona, more often than not, the person doesn't meet the image the imagination creates. Problem is, there was a lot of time dedicated to this persona, and it's very easy for the sunk cost fallacy to seep into this situ…
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/22 05:03 PM
4

That's a fantastic start!
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/22 04:49 PM
1

I think the desperation might be adding to the pressure on him, and sometimes that can have an exponential affect, which makes it harder to find the motivation to do things when it feels like nothing is going right. That's part of why getting him out with men to do man things helps, and that's also why I brought up trying to get him to do man stuff around the home. My friend's husband was in the dumps and after a weekend of helping his buddy fix his car, he was right as rain. You mentioned churc…
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/22 04:44 PM
6

That's also important information, but is it just because he took the summer off to reset? Did he just start skipping class? Did he drop them all? Did he register for the upcoming year?
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/22 04:33 PM
1

OP, I saw it mentioned elsewhere about you both being in University. This is an extremely important detail which affects a lot of things. I'd almost recommend editing your post to include this detail because it will greatly improve the quality of the advice you're receiving. If you both have enough funding to be housed without working, him focusing on his studies might be a better move in the long run for now.
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/22 04:23 PM
3

Is there a reason he might not like your dad?
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/22 03:00 PM
1

How's your social life?
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/22 02:32 PM
7

That's a case by case thing. In OP's situation, there's no ongoing pattern here. She mentioned him being unemployed for a season. That's really not long in the grand scheme of things. There's also no evidence of abuse. Just a cranky man. They don't appear to have a social support system. This is something that could help and should be explored before going nuclear.
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/22 02:14 PM
18

When this is over you both need to work on developing a social life. A lack of friends could be contributing to this mess. The more you "support" the more it might add to this down spiral. The others have mentioned hitting rock bottom. Sometimes that needs to happen. Men like feeling needed, and he's probably not feeling very needed right now, despite being more needed than ever. Getting him out of the house and doing man things with man friends is usually the best way to get him out of a rut. I…
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/22 01:59 PM
1

Does he have any guy friends or family members who are men?
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/22 05:36 AM
11

Go get those nails done. ;) Congratulations!
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/22 06:29 PM
3

Gotcha. Those are really hurtful words to hear, especially from your life partner. My ex-husband did something similar and it didn't feel good. It didn't work out for us. That doesn't mean it can't work out for you two. In terms of answering the question in your post, when he threw those words out there, he took the ball and put it in his court. Everything right now is on him. It's not your job to police him on this journey and it's not your job to read his mind either. If he's where I think he …
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/22 06:15 PM
2

Out of curiosity, when you said "he threw a RP" at you, what happened there?
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/22 05:22 PM
5

This can all be extremely overwhelming. Don't forget to take deep breaths! Change is scary, but it sounds like you've got a lot on your plate and letting some of that off will be a huge cathartic relief. Don't be afraid to relax and take things in! Rome wasn't built in a day! Have you read The Surrendered Wife yet? If not, that might be a good next step.
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/22 04:33 AM
14

First of all, welcome. :) Second of all, don't ever feel bad or regret doing what is best for your family and kids. You were doing the best you could with what you had. There are plenty of people with all sorts of different lifestyles here and some things work better for some than others. It sounds like the important thing is you and your husband seem to be recognizing things aren't working as they are, and that is the first step towards figuring out your paths forward. Thirdly, everything at th…
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/22 02:05 AM
1

Whether it's with women or friends or the younger members of my family passing through town, I generally (a) pick the restaurant, and then (b) establish at the beginning of the evening that "it's on me" and "have whatever you would like." If concern is expressed on the part of the other person(s), I usually say "Don't worry; I'll make more." This is an excellent example of when not to offer to pay, but when someone's not applying LMR avoidance techniques to the finances of the date, things can b…
/r/RedPillWomen01/09/22 03:58 PM
1

I think it's when someone reaches across the table to grab the check but doesn't actually mean to grab the check
/r/RedPillWomen01/09/22 03:50 PM
5

Say two people are on a date and the check came and she pulled out her card, 100% willing to pay or go dutch. If he insisted to pay, she says "thank you" and puts her wallet away. Just curious, what about that is offensive?
/r/RedPillWomen01/09/22 03:10 PM
3

Yep. In some ways paying felt like a safety measure especially on the off chance I ended up on a date with "a perfect gentleman" in text who gave me the vibe they were paying for dinner with the objective of getting "repayment" later.
/r/RedPillWomen01/09/22 02:59 PM
6

It's 2022, not 1952. Message first. Offer to pay. Be the first one to talk about safely taking it offline if that's where it started. Suggest the meeting place. Don't overthink it with these sorts of things. Not long ago, "traditional" meant the man told the woman's father he was interested and the next thing she knew she might be on a date with a man she doesn't care for. The rules have all changed and all the minor details about who's paying and who messages first should be thrown out the wind…
/r/RedPillWomen01/09/22 01:13 PM
1

CHECK OUT THE TODY APP. It gamefies cleaning. Other hacks to make cleaning feel less daunting: Maximize your trips. Have to go to the bathroom? What within reach belongs in there but isn't grab it and put it away on the way! Another helpful thing is to just set a 5 minute timer and start cleaning something. If the 5 minutes is up and you don't want to do it anymore, at least you dedicated 5 minutes to it. Sometimes you end up on a roll and want to keep going. That's a victory! Throw a cleaning a…
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/22 09:49 PM
3

This is pretty standard RP terminology. The red archives have plenty of info on this subject and there might be some info in the wiki on this sub. :)
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/22 09:41 PM
1

I'm cool with it. I think I might have something to add, such as the conversations and actions in the year leading up to his proposal which ironically mirror the running themes in that post, but my time is limited at the moment.
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/22 07:49 PM
1

I found my field report!
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/22 05:48 PM
44

I don't think this is shit-testing. At closest to to shit-testing, it's compliance testing, but this doesn't fit that mold either. Most likely, if related to anything at all, it was a form of game to get your hamster spinning. Sounds like it was successful. To be honest, it seems like your reaction was entertaining and he was amused by it so he kept trolling you.
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/22 05:40 PM
6

Your friend is right. Don't ask. Let him bring it to the table. That doesn't mean you shouldn't do anything, though. You have options. This is a vetting opportunity for you. Just tell him you really like him and you're having trouble not imagining a future without him. Hell, tell him "I want to be your girlfriend." Or "I've never felt like this with anyone before." Whatever it is, make it honest and make it vulnerable. Can you trust him with that kind of vulnerability? The idea probably feels un…
/r/RedPillWomen30/08/22 10:12 PM
5

I had no idea he was gone. Which means he's probably not going to see this and if there's anyone I owe thanks to the most it's probably him. 🥲 I didn't realize your post was specifically for me; I don't know how I could express my gratitude or happy tears to know this. I was at a point in my life where everything demolished itself: my house, my credit, my career, my support system, my health, my professional network, pretty much all my "friends" and even some family. Many internet strangers all …
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/22 03:39 AM
6

Honestly, besides the sidebar, I've got these three things: First and foremost, do everything you can to develop and maintain a growth mindset. Everything about personal growth, managing a relationship, and being able to navigate life for the past half a decade or so for me has boiled down to realizing how much someone's mindset can affect outcomes. Second, what really matters in this life is not where you are relative to your peers, but where you are relative to yourself when you first began. L…
/r/RedPillWomen24/08/22 04:39 PM

YOU'RE STILL AROUND! Your "from plate to wife" post was the thing that started it all for me.... and 6 months or so ago I went looking for you and realized the account I knew you by was also deleted and I was terribly sad. So much of this post was for you and I'm so happy you read it. Sounds like you're doing well too, I'm glad to see it!
/r/RedPillWomen24/08/22 04:38 PM

Oh gosh, I'm really touched by this. Thanks for linking it, what a throwback! I've employed that advice in two relationships. I'm so glad you've found it useful too.
/r/RedPillWomen24/08/22 04:38 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter