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thingswedidaskids Archive

View 4 posts and 52 comments by thingswedidaskids on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

Thanks for the feedback We are both tired of trying. We've been married for 20 years and during this time, my husband has been unfaithful with more than 3 women. I've done all I can to heal as much as I can from this but he isn't willingly taking accountability for the hurt and just wants to "move on" without dealing with the impacts of it. Maybe I also just don't trust him anymore. I don't know. If it was just a trivial oh life's not so great it would be easier to fight. But I'm tired of being …
/r/RedPillWomen19/11/23 12:10 AM
1

If he's already exercising etc and it's doing nothing to help with his t levels then unfortunately the only thing he can do is to supplement.
/r/RedPillWomen18/11/23 11:32 PM
3

Have him check his t levels.
/r/RedPillWomen13/11/23 09:13 AM
2

This has given me a lot to think about. Thank you.
/r/RedPillWomen03/11/23 03:37 AM
1

I'll try to reword how I say things so he doesn't take it as a critisism.
/r/RedPillWomen03/11/23 03:34 AM
1

The midnight library by Matt haig
/r/RedPillWomen26/10/23 08:26 AM
5

My husband and I are in the same "let's see what happens phase". I have 4 children and marriage means a lot to me. For me marriage is all or nothing so this "let's see what happens" makes me cringe. It's not easy but 100% agree in not talking about it. Don't focus on what you can do for him anymore. But do what makes you happy. You're anxious etc and that is coming out in ways you don't realise that impact him. So essentially doing for yourself is also doing for him because you're no longer anxi…
/r/RedPillWomen26/10/23 02:09 AM
1

Garlic yes thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/23 10:43 PM
1

You're right i think it's all in the broth.. Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/23 10:42 PM
1

Rice!! What a wonderful idea!
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/23 10:42 PM
2

What kind of aromatics btw?
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/23 10:42 PM
3

Thank you so much!
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/23 10:41 PM
4

I definitely think the spice will help thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/23 10:41 PM
1

This is amazing thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen14/10/23 10:41 PM
3

Whatever you do, don't ask for details. I would recommend therapy for yourself only. As another poster suggested I would do breathing exercises or find a somatic therapist who can help you with that. I would also recommend trying to name the issue you are having. If you name it, say for example you name it "the wishy washy jungle" or something totally random; when you think of it say to yourself "oh thats the wishy washy jungle" and then replace it with something that makes you happy. Like for m…
/r/RedPillWomen09/10/23 06:42 AM
5

Do not go to couples counselling. It will not help. Do seek counselling for yourself and perhaps he could seek counselling for himself as well, considering there was some sort of betrayal, it may help him also understand why its happened. I would seriously actively seek out looking for what is good about him. When you think of something you don't like or you have a bad feeling, think about soemthing good to replace it. It could be that he helps you around the house. That he's thoughtful. That yo…
/r/RedPillWomen05/10/23 01:17 AM
1

My husband told me "you're not exactly beautiful" major kick in the face. I know how you feel. I try to realise my worth and look at the things that I value about myself. Your husband has apologised and maybe he said it in jest.
/r/RedPillWomen03/10/23 02:17 AM
1

Life is too short for these silly games. You could easily have just thrown away a good man because you were not mature enough to be truthful. Take this as a lesson. Always be true to yourself and to others. Nothing good comes from games. Ever. ETA don't bring it up on a joking way as he was asking you a serious question which you just blew him off about. I'd suggest that you say something like I've been thinking about how you asked how I see our relationship and I've given it a lot of thought an…
/r/RedPillWomen27/09/23 02:36 AM
2

That's a really great reminder. The process is for me. I guess that's a little disheartening though as I had seen claims from others who implemented the Empowered Wife and had very obvious outcomes
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/23 09:14 AM
1

I'm so so sorry ❤️ I hope your heart has healed now.
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/23 05:27 AM
2

I'm referring to Laura Doyles explanation of fixing your side of the street if that helps?
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/23 04:29 AM
1

I wonder if he will eventually and say he misses her just for sex? It might be important if he does call or initiate a meeting that it's somewhere public perhaps where they can be together as a couple but no expectation of sex?
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/23 03:49 AM
1

Do you mind me asking how this hit you? Did you see it coming?
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/23 03:47 AM
3

Vintage styles can be sexy too. I'd look for corset type outfits maybe? Some lift in the breasts, maybe some dresses with a higher slit etc?
/r/RedPillWomen17/09/23 07:40 AM
3

You're also right about not wanting to be an imposition. I get that too. But slowly realised in my marriage that doing those things made my husband consider me controlling and so I had to stop for both our sanity lol.
/r/RedPillWomen17/09/23 02:10 AM
3

There is so much to unpack here. It's highly likely he's already in a relationship or married. Specific times of availability, only spoken on the phone a few times. Only texting etc. You've probably just been swept off your feet because of the validation you're getting from him and not so much the romance. If he's being dishonest and you're noticing red flags (not yellow), I'd try really hard to break the bond with him. That will mean no contact. If he is married or supposed to be committed to s…
/r/RedPillWomen17/09/23 02:06 AM
4

I could be wrong but I think everyone (and men in particular) feel that if they are dismissed once they are less likely to ask again. I think it's important to note that when they've offered to do something it's because they want to serve you or make you happy. Like say your partner asks if you want a glass of water because they notice its a hot day and you say no thank you... By saying no or even saying "it's okay I can get it" can be unintentionally demeaning. Sometimes just saying yes please …
/r/RedPillWomen17/09/23 01:58 AM
10

Yes. Even if it takes longer than I'd like, I don't do it. He has offered to do something for me and men like to be heroes. I might remind him in a way of expressing that I really want something. Like say for example he agrees to make a veggie patch in the backyard and hasn't done it after a couple of weeks I might say "I really can't wait to plant some strawberries this season" as a way of reminding but not asking.
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/23 11:59 PM
10

I'm so very sorry this has happened. I hope this isn't insensitive but I think him going out with this girl was already an indication he wanted to end things and the argument is just an excuse to make him not feel guilty about it. It's time for loads of self care! Get your nails and hair done, buy yourself a new book, go out for coffee with a friend. 💕 ETA please please don't contact him. The more distance you give the more confident you will appear. It will be super hard to just leave him alone…
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/23 10:08 PM
1

There's nothing that can be done to help him if he isn't actively looking for help himself. People on here saying you need to be understanding of him etc don't realise that you ARE understanding. How he feels about you and implying you wouldn't manage without him come from his projection. I wouldn't take it to heart. Please focus on self care at this time. Don't get all up in trying to understand and help etc.
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/23 05:52 AM
1

Interesting. Great insight
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/23 02:20 AM
1

Does that one on one dinnet/drinks with the opposite sex happen often or ever
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/23 02:16 AM
1

And the answer to the question?
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/23 02:10 AM
2

So honestly you're okay if your husband is sitting opposite another woman having dinner or drinks on his own? You don't feel that crosses any line because you trust him? Or is that going beyond your trust because he has you and that shoild be you sitting across from him? Also why does he need female friends to do this with?
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/23 02:04 AM
2

Valid. Your partner should also extend care, accept legitimate boundaries and understandings.
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/23 02:00 AM
0

Then what you say about your trust in your husband has no bearing on this forum. Go play house somewhere else.
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/23 01:57 AM
1

And your husband goes out drinking one on one with a single female without you? ETA I also know this is reddit and you can easily lie through your teeth. "yes he does and I'm fine with it because he TELLS me how annoying she is and that she's not his type and he would never do anything with her" Yeah, sorry hate to break it to you.. Being an RPW =/= being a dumb doormat.
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/23 12:50 AM
4

It always starts off as "you're so paranoid, she's just a friend" Women have intuition. We're also not dumb and blind. In all seriousness, if he wants to be in a relationship, it's not going to be one sided. He has to consider her in ANY decision he makes. If he wants to do whatever he wants and then expect her to be okay, then he is not ready for a relationship and can be sensible, masculine and real, and leave.
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/23 12:19 AM
1

I'll dm you.
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/23 09:04 PM
10

He needs to be castrated so that he doesn't go on a date with another women while in a committed relationship? He has no balls. If he doesn't want to commit to her and wants to date other women, having balls means breaking up instead of dragging her through his shit. Maybe actually read what RPW is. Because you're very mistaken. You may be happy for your man to date other women. But no true high value woman would ever be okay with this. ETA oh makes sense. You're on OF. Of course you don't know …
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/23 05:27 AM
2

Don't ignore him. Just don't engage. Say what you have to say and that's it. If he's starting to name call or say things that are untrue say nothing but give a sad face. The more you try to bite back the worse he will be. Don't try to explain yourself.
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/23 01:35 AM
2

It's possible your partner also suffers from ADHD and so that's why things feel overwhelming. It's okay that you don't trust him as he isn't showing you that he is trustworthy and as much as others go on about "vetting" the reality is that circumstances, life and general aging change people. It's not necessarily bad, it's just what happens. It doesn't make him bad or you bad or that you "vetted" wrongly etc. You are highly empathetic which is why you ended up with a man like this. He needs someo…
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/23 01:30 AM
3

I would not be okay with this. Offer to go with him if he wants to meet her and be friends you can go and be friends with her too. If he says no or doesn't like the idea then there may be some feelings there that he isn't saying although this is highly speculation. I'd talk to him about boundaries. Say you would like for him to make friends, but you're not comfortable if he's one on one with another female on his own drinking (especially - if that's something you're worried about) My husband che…
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/23 12:16 AM
3

The more I read the more I feel you. I used to do this exact thing also. For so many years I tried to prove myself to someone who didn't want to see it. So stop trying to prove yourself. It's hard because you want him to see your value but he won't see it if you say it. Do what you need for yourself to be happy.
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/23 12:12 AM
5

You have a wonderful man and yes everyone is going to love him too. And some women will want to sleep with him or make him theirs. That's the reality of being with a good man. Try to picture it like you're the lucky one and they lucked out. Sad for them.
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/23 11:53 PM
4

I wouldn't recommend sitting him down. He does not seem like the type who is receptive to "talking it through" . He already knows its not ideal behaviour. Re-enforcing that will only make him feel weaker and you controlling. My husband is the exact way yours is. I suggest when he is this way you walk away. Do not engage at all. He asks you where the school clothes are, say you don't know and do your own thing or act like you're busy.. Ie MAKE yourself busy - empty the dishwasher, take the clothe…
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/23 11:50 PM
5

Wow I didn't read this until after I posted my previous reply. I saw a psychologist for myself and that helped me be better for me, not for us. I would recommend this to you also. You're probably also worried that this behaviour he's showing your son isn't ideal either (I was the same), but if you do as above and be the one consistently loving parent to your child and have your own in jokes etc it will be okay. (not to say your husband doesn't love your child, but you "get" your son in a differe…
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/23 11:42 PM
4

I wouldn't recommend sitting him down. He does not seem like the type who is receptive to "talking it through" . He already knows its not ideal behaviour. Re-enforcing that will only make him feel weaker and you controlling. My husband is the exact way yours is. I suggest when he is this way you walk away. Do not engage at all. He asks you where the school clothes are, say you don't know and do your own thing or act like you're busy.. Ie MAKE yourself busy - empty the dishwasher, take the clothe…
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/23 11:35 PM
3

This is such an awesome depiction of what happens. Seriously awesome and was so fun to read lol
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/23 10:56 PM
175

You're spiritually not the same. The moment you said this it was a clue it wasn't going to work long term. I think maybe in the future it's bettwr not to refer to things to a potential partner as "triggers". It can make you come off needy and dramatic. Perhaps say what you value "I really value talking to you consistently because it makes me feel special" for example. Then he's not having to meet an expectation because you're just saying what you like. Tarot cards might be fun for you but to oth…
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/23 06:09 AM
6

Can you purchase your own scrubs? Scrubs can look hot on women if they're shaped.
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/23 03:53 AM
6

Please do not go into detail. Please. It will eat at you and you will resent him. My husband cheated on me and I got details. It was the worst thing for me because it tainted everything. Don't ask. Move on.
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/23 11:39 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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