| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 26 | Destroy the concept that your teen years are supposed to be fun and once you hit 25, you’re old and it’s over. Some of us had to heal from trauma during our teen years and our 20s (30s, 40s, 50s and so on) and would like to begin a good life without constantly being told it’s too late.Truth. I think something clicks at or around thirty, and there are further clicks as you get older. It can't be learned or pre-empted ahead of time, it's life experience. I have had the 30 click already, and I am excited about what kind of forty-year-old I will be. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/21 12:19 PM |
| 371 | Some women get so desperate for the ring they end up accepting any situation just for the sake of being married. Better be single than with scrotes like this...I'm reminded of the book Feminism for Teenagers by Sophie Grillet - a 90s staple for me and still highly relevant. She had a man claiming similar, 'it's natural for women to do [all the domestic and reproductive labour]', and has the women respond, 'okay, fine - how many antelope did you bring home from the hunt and are they skinned, chopped and in the freezer?' It's like, if they want to do sex roles, great, perform your damn sex role and provide, let your pregnant wife rest. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/21 08:23 AM |
| 368 | Some women get so desperate for the ring they end up accepting any situation just for the sake of being married. Better be single than with scrotes like this...Maybe she could strap a reversed backpack to his front with a bowling ball or two in it. Biology being as it is, parity is impossible but it’d show effort. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/21 06:21 AM |
| 82 | Research proves men are not the heroes they claim!Titanic is a bit of a special interest of mine so excuse the nerdery: there was a difference in understanding among the officers how to execute the 'women and children' order. Mr Murdoch, loading boats on the starboard side, took it to mean 'women and children first' and filled up remaining space with men when there were no women nearby. Mr Lightoller, on the port side, reportedly took it as a blanket 'women and children only' and actively kicked out men trying to jump in his boats. He's been mu… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/21 12:51 PM |
| 17 | Research proves men are not the heroes they claim!I'll establish my farm just outside the limits of Dinesberg, come for tea any time. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/21 12:45 PM |
| 10 | Accurate.Also: the kinky threesome occurred in the World of Warcraft. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/21 03:29 PM |
| 3 | I blocked and deleted ...Be sure to take care of yourself. Even when entirely justified, like here, going NC with a parent isn't easy emotionally and the grief hammer can bop you at the most unexpected times. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/08/21 08:45 AM |
| 139 | Boundaries in bedAlways best not to explain or justify your wants, as that just gives him a way to argue with you. 'Don't pull my hair'. Full stop. If you're truly having an intimate moment and he is listening to you, that should be enough. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/08/21 07:41 AM |
| 3 | The meaning of "boundaries"Well said. There's so much more to boundaries than figuring out what they are. If you've been raised with none, it's a surprisingly steep learning curve. The temptation is to just think, I've got this great new tool, everything will be all right now. Any reasonable, normal person would respect it. Then the boundary-establisher is surprised when those around them just carry on as before. The 'communicating' and 'enforcing' side of boundaries isn't taught well enough, IMO, and if you're having to … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/08/21 09:18 AM |
| 40 | Living large and proud to show the world his mad skills as a home decoratorI can smell this room through my screen. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/08/21 07:22 PM |
| 14 | But he’s got a 2k PC set up for gaming, complete with a $200 chair, spends $300-500 a month on weed/alcohol/fast food…but you should settle for this Cracker Jack ring because he shouldn’t have to prove he loves you. The pick me’s in the comments were just sad…This sub has really got me into BDSM: Block, Delete: Scrote managed | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/21 09:17 AM |
| 93 | Imagine needing pixels to get in the mood..Not sure these men are even attracted to women, although they're ostensibly straight. They don't have any curiosity about women's bodies, pleasure, the mental and emotional aspects of sex. They're basically looking for an unfeeling, inert sleeve to masturbate into. Glad sis is contemplating divorce. She will need to be careful that her relative inexperience is not taken advantage of by future scrotes. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/21 09:01 AM |
| 121 | Guy I was dating left me at 4 am alone in the middle of the city to go rescue his ex. WTF?Sounds like he’d already messed up by not getting you home by 4am, but that’s just the rotten cherry on the shit cake. Definitely better off getting rid. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/07/21 09:41 PM |
| 6 | If he wanted to fix his mental health, he would...Once, when still living the clown life, I actually wrote out a step by step list for my husband about how a bathroom is cleaned, as he found the mental load of thinking about such menial work overwhelming and triggering to his anxiety disorder. He asked for this, plus a 'mental load board', because he's an enlightened man and really wants to pull his weight without me having to ask (nag), he just doesn't see what needs doing like me with my woman eyes. Needless to say, it did not work, and after… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/07/21 07:29 AM |
| 99 | If he wanted to fix his mental health, he would...Why would men want to be happier when they have a get-out-of-jail card for any form of bad behaviour? 'I had to cheat, because of my mental health...' 'I couldn't stop myself from verbally/sexually/physically abusing you, because mental health..." "Looking after the house or doing activities makes my mental health worse! I just need to have no pressure and chill out with some porn and computer games." No wonder it's an epidemic. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/07/21 07:40 AM |
| 143 | Do you think men who are into petite women are creepy lvm?Society has done a number on women - whether we're tiny and cute or tall and shapely, we're socialised to hate ourselves and wish we looked different. I have the 'developed', tall, curvy body type, and for a lot of my life I wanted to be smol and androgynous (I think, in hindsight, so I could escape the male gaze). Stuff that, both our bodies are fine, it's how gross men are looking at them that is the problem. And yeah, run a mile from anime boys, they are after some sort of racist stereotype a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/21 07:57 AM |
| 7 | I got divorced today! 🍾🎊🎉Congratulations! Better times ahead. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/05/21 02:04 PM |
| 252 | What is everyone’s thoughts on Billie Eilish now “showing skin”? What does her defense make you feel?I feel like she's had some bad advice by people who are not looking out for her. She seems to have swallowed the 'sexy = empowering' whole without thinking about what power she's getting from it. It probably does feel better than when everyone was being horrible about her body that one time she wore a vest and shorts, but maybe she hasn't learned the difference between positive attention and respect. Eh. It's not great, but can forgive a 19 year old for not having top notch radical feminist anal… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/05/21 05:15 PM |
| 19 | Which red flag shall we pick first?I can almost smell the Lynx through my screen. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/02/21 09:16 AM |
| 50 | The vibes of liberal men towards me since I started with FDSThe present lib-left is overtly misogynistic. Not that the right treats women well either, but there isn’t this visceral kind of hatred for women questioning the ‘cool girl’ libfem kink-n-porn narrative and demanding to be treated with respect. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/01/21 01:59 PM |
| 38 | Not a ring but a commitment gift to myself anyways. 2021 I cherish and put myself first.Lovely. I really think we buy ourselves the best presents. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/01/21 08:38 PM |
| 143 | this angers me so muchAnd, of course, you can solve problems with such men by 'communicating' with them | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/11/20 11:35 AM |
| 37 | A lot of men don’t love their wivesYeah, I'm no Plato fan (all that theistic anti-rationalism) but Aristotle was the one who prescribed different virtues for women - all the subservient, housekeeping, manpleasing ones. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 01:27 PM |
| 12 | OLD is so effin grimIf you know because you did it, you're not alone, sister. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/11/20 03:47 PM |
| 17 | OLD is so effin grimYeah, that's not a good sign at all. I can get being an indoorsy person but I'm basically a plant, I don't understand how anyone could hate nature and genuinely prefer to substitute it with getting backache and eye strain staring at pixels. Eventually that's going to affect your ability to relate to the content in games, which are mostly made by people who go outside occasionally... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/11/20 03:45 PM |
| 131 | OLD is so effin grimI feel women gamers/nerds need to be especially careful, as LVM-ism is rife among men who share our interests - to the point I'm beginning to consider it a red flag. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/11/20 08:05 AM |
| 15 | [seeking advice] any warning / suggestions for vetting divorced men? For men who’ve been officially divorced for 2+ years.Find out what his ex wife put on the divorce petition, if possible. I knew, and didn’t like, his ex wife. I should have believed her when she cited his abuse, though. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/10/20 06:20 AM |
| 27 | Been wondering for some time; how many neurodivergent women are here?I’m autistic, was diagnosed pretty late. It has been helpful to know, as now I know there’s a reason I can’t read or intuit people’s intentions, so get taken advantage of by LVM because I don’t see the red flags. FDS is good for women like me as it explicitly spells them out, very ASD-friendly. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/10/20 06:03 AM |
| 21 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered: October 7 2020Hello sisters. Kickhimout2020 going mostly well. My house is looking magnificent. I want to say 'feminine' but don't know if that's the right term; what I mean is it's clean, someone (me) has paid attention to aesthetics and decoration, everything smells fresh, there are vases of flowers. None of my pans or dishes have cheese stuck to the outside. No more crusty man cave taking up half the living room. I can study without being interrupted. None of my clothes have been damaged or shrunk by inept… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/10/20 07:29 AM |
| 7 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered: October 7 2020Your grandmother sounds wonderful. I feel like a book of grandmother wisdom should be compiled and distributed to all young women who might not have ready access to their own female elders. My lovely gran, may she RIP, spent the last 30 years of her life happily single and growing roses. She understood the tactics of inadequate males and had no time for them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/10/20 07:15 AM |
| 34 | I literally got downvoted and told not to kinkshame because i said i never had rape fantasies. (:(:I like how you crossed him out with a lightsaber, though. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/09/20 10:43 AM |
| 28 | Let it goI miss the good times too. Then I remember the time he got me a Pokémon pin badge for my 33rd birthday. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/20 04:52 PM |
| 54 | UPDATE: We are changing our policy on polyamory!Same, I was like 'oh, no, no!' and then... always read to the end. Brilliant. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/20 06:19 AM |
| 17 | A reminder to the older Queens of FDS(30+)!Life begins at 30. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/09/20 07:23 AM |
| 18 | Why are there so many men on tinder who are poly or couples who are looking for a unicorn?It used to be, but in my experience, now we're outdated and all the cool people are 'pan'. Unicorn-hunting is a real problem and bi people struggle from both not having a real 'community' and being fetishised by straight couples. Mostly we just want to get on with our lives and have high-quality, meaningful relationships like everyone else. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 12:46 PM |
| 6 | Problems with fiance making comments and gaslightingI'm an early bird and I can confirm we're no more efficient and motivated than anyone else. They're just human variations, some of which get unfairly prioritised due to how they sync with the standard work day. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/09/20 08:54 AM |
| 58 | Problems with fiance making comments and gaslightingI don't think that's gaslighting, from what you've described. He hasn't tried to edit history, claim things never happened or make you doubt your sanity. That said, you're evidently not happy, and you don't have to justify being unhappy with a situation - you feel what you feel. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/09/20 07:18 AM |
| 10 | Ben Shapiro gets draaaagggged by the Internet for thinking WAP is a medical condition. His response:Mrs Shapiro, blink once for support and twice for rescue. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 07:10 AM |
| 4 | If you had stayed with your LVM, what music would the radio play? 😆I had some scrote in my DMs for this comment telling me to listen to Amon Amarth. forever lol. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/08/20 03:33 PM |
| 2 | Living alone tipsThere's some excellent advice on this thread. I live alone and it's awesome - 100% better than living with a partner - but personal safety is a real concern and you're right to take it seriously. I have a security light, motion cameras and I'm in the process of getting my locks upgraded as well as removing one of the back entry routes to my house. The point I'd really underline from other comments that I have personally found to be true is trust your intuition. If you are in the habit of overrid… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/08/20 09:23 AM |
| 13 | PLEASE IF YOU READ ANYTHING TODAY LET IT BE THIS. Every single woman needs to read this: Andrea Dworkin's testimony to the Attorney General's commission on pornography. Absolutely stunning and devastatingDworkin is an incredibly powerful writer. I don't know if it's the repetition or the explicit, unapologetic imagery, but... wow. She saw it coming, indeed. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/08/20 07:34 AM |
| 5 | If you had stayed with your LVM, what music would the radio play? 😆Fantasy power-metal bands with songs about dragons and vikings. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/08/20 06:38 AM |
| 3 | Being on this sub is making me realize I might not be attracted to menr/LesbianDatingStrategy might not be a bad place to explore your feelings. I think women's sexuality is often more complex than men's and it does change throughout our lives. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/08/20 06:54 AM |
| 1 | Saw this post in the dating subreddit and realized the importance of being happy alone. You can still feel intimacy and closeness with friends and family. Feeling this way leads to codependency.It's close, but not identical - as some things you do to 'work on yourself' are not enjoyable, but ultimately they're in your own best interest. Maybe there's a better intermediate phrase, as I also find 'work on yourself' a bit puritan and like someone is telling me to go to the gym and stop wasting time having fun. I, cheesily, like the 'be your best self' thing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 12:23 PM |
| 9 | “TaLk To HiM aBoUt It” 🙄I hear you! Reminds me of when I beat my lv ex in duels and he would pout and complain about my class being overpowered. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/08/20 02:36 PM |
| 13 | “TaLk To HiM aBoUt It” 🙄I am a WoW player. (a) it is horrendously addictive, and (b) men who play it regularly are almost invariably also porn addicts and just boring company. It was fun for escapism when we were locked in our houses for weeks on end, but sheesh, scroteous man, put down raid night and interact with the naked woman right behind you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/08/20 02:17 PM |
| 22 | Never, ever settle for a scroteous LVM thinking he’ll stay loyal because you’re a literal goddess.'scroteous' I will use that in a sentence today. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/08/20 07:27 PM |
| 33 | The most audacious part of this is that they continuously use the term “partner” instead of “bangmaid” 🤮It’s called strategic incompetence. The men who do this will cry ADHD, ‘no one ever taught me’, ‘I don’t have a talent for it like you’, ‘different standards’ etc - but funnily enough they always seem to manage to perform at work. It’s at home they fall to bits and become helpless distractible children. Feminists have been onto it since at least the 70s. https://www.cwluherstory.org/classic-feminist-writings-articles/the-politics-of-housework | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/08/20 06:10 AM |
| 2 | Most importantly, NEVER SETTLE LADIES!Or, Don't marry. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/08/20 02:26 PM |
| 3 | STD Testing....General agreement, but please don’t give blood to find out whether you have HIV/Syphillis. The reason is that the tests are not infallible and it can sometimes take a while to be detectable in the blood after a person is infected, so a unit of infected blood could go undetected and be transfused to a recipient. It’s why they ask the ‘lifestyle’ questions when you donate rather than just relying on testing the donated blood. It’s actually stated on the donation literature here that you should nev… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/08/20 08:42 AM |
| 7 | How LVM act in a high stress & shitty situationHmm. If it happened as he said, I think he had been the asshole up to that point. Weird saviour complex about taking in a single mother and her traumatised child, thinks house and BMW equal value, did not recognise kid needed help (a failing of both adults here). That said, everyone has a right to protect themselves from abuse - and deliberately wrecking someone’s personal property is abuse, which isn’t always partner-partner, can be parent-child, sibling-sibling etc. Her trauma explains her act… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/07/20 06:44 AM |
| 23 | Anything > married to a LVM gamerMy theory is that the cake artist sees what future lies before this poor woman and is trying to warn her, in cake form, while keeping to the light-hearted gaming cake brief. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/07/20 11:02 AM |
| 53 | Why are some women always offended when someone doesn't support sex work?They all have the same ‘friend’ who loves her stripper/camgirl job, makes loads of money, isn’t remotely traumatised or dissociated from her body by the process of being bought and sold, and comfortable dealing with all the really deviant requests men can’t get from a non-transactional relationship. She must be the most popular woman in the world, so many friends, everyone’s heard of her. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/07/20 05:59 AM |
| 31 | Staying friends with exs - what's the point?The question to answer is, the behaviour that made you break up with them - is that something you would accept and admire in a friend? If not, you have your answer. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/07/20 05:55 AM |
| 0 | Dumped a LVM for the first time, cut off all my hair, and printed out the handbook - all in under a week. THANK YOU FDS!!!An elf IRL! It really suits you (book and haircut) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/07/20 09:26 PM |
| 21 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered July 23 2020Hello sisters. Not sure if this has been asked before, but is there a FDS-like approach to same sex relationships? I'm bisexual, and tbh find the male offering disappointing, so I plan to prioritise relationships with women in the future. However the dynamic there is quite different, risks are lower etc, but I still want to approach relationships in a high-value way. A lot of the basic handbook stuff will hold true, but any insights on inter-queen relations? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/07/20 08:23 AM |
| 2 | Women seem terrified of leaving shitty marriages: why?I'm in this situation. I did decide to leave him because I couldn't tolerate his behaviour. However, I understand why many women do stay in bad marriages. It's often a frying pan vs fire situation. In my country, there is no such thing as 'independent assets' while married. I did run a side business, I brought substantial assets to the marriage and I saved hard while in it. The courts consider that irrelevant - if you earned it during the marriage, it's a matrimonial asset, and often what you br… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/07/20 08:08 AM |
| 40 | This is why you do not accept rough sex. Being a kinkmeisha will get you killed. This poor girl deserves justice! 2 years is a joke! 😔I remember this case. The details of what he did to her are absolutely horrific. He left her to die on his floor, eventually got round to calling emergency services and was flippant about it even then. This was a straight-up murder and Natalie has not had anything resembling justice. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/07/20 11:55 AM |
| 25 | HVM or LVM? Having a hard time telling with this oneThe first one alone would be enough to get rid. Narcissistic and boring. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/07/20 09:22 PM |
| 3 | Bf smokes jul pods and nicotine sticksThanks, I learned a new word :) Point stands (unlike his dick) - sex is not the time for a vape session. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/20 08:34 AM |
| 2 | Bf smokes jul pods and nicotine sticksNever even heard of a ‘jul pod’. Is that kid lingo for a spliff or something? Aside from the performance impact, why is he doing that mid sex? He should be focused on his partner. Feels disrespectful. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/20 07:08 AM |
| 7 | I’m Dating MyselfLove this. In a similar boat, newly single and less sad than I expected to be. Recently I took the time to paint my newly grown (ex biter) fingernails in multichrome green/purple. I'm not used to it and it's like having jewels on my fingers every time I look down. I'm reading books agasin, rather than just articles and social media. My attention span is a mess but I'm enjoying some HP Lovecraft before bed. All of that Korean skincare. Bring me snail slime. Putting my stuff in what used to be his… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/20 07:31 PM |
| 11 | If you can’t tell people what he didVery relatable. A good strategy is to imagine a friend explaining the behaviour to you, and respond appropriately to it. The time my ex threw a road-rage strop and nearly got the police called on us because he couldn't park where he wanted to springs to mind. I was scared by his anger and the potential legal consequences, and had no idea how to even bounce it off someone else because I thought they'd think I was an idiot for tolerating it. This is also a misconception. Usually, outside the bad-r… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/07/20 07:15 AM |
| 26 | Hes doing fineIf you mean 'eating family packs of baked beans and watching porn'.... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/20 06:26 AM |
| 3 | What a high value man isThat's true love. It's sad that that was the outcome. I found the 'bailing on your sick spouse' post shocking (although, as I read more here, less and less surprising). When i married we did custom vows and didn't include 'in sickness and in health' because it seemed self-evident. Apparently not. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/06/20 07:17 AM |
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