TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

throwaway_coy4wttf79 Archive

View 3 posts and 106 comments by throwaway_coy4wttf79 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
16

I lost $800k in my divorce, on a net worth of $1M. Ah well. I was happier when I was poorer, anyway. Less decisions. Can I afford it --> Nope! And I didn't realize how nice it was to not have someone bitching and leeching off me everyday. At least I learned my lesson -- never getting married again.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/26 10:47 PM
3

You and me both brother
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/26 01:33 AM
1

Ridiculous. What's the point? She's not going to starve without it.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/26 07:17 AM
2

Holy Christ I thought mine was bad. Fuck that noise. Maybe for a couple years transition time but an adult should be expected to take care of themselves.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/26 07:15 AM
2

Missouri. 9 year marriage. 50/50 custody. I make $220k, she makes $60k. Never a stay-at-home mom, and I put her through her master's degree. $3300/mo total ($2100 alimony) + I pay 70% of all kid bills. Alimony is "forever" (unless she remarries or makes more). She spent over $200k on a lawyer. She took it from our kids' college fund, which no longer exists.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/26 07:10 AM
8

Yeah in hindsight I should have paid lawyers with debt financing so that debt could be split. I paid it with contested funds because it was the only cash available, and the court-ordered act of paying was counted against those funds being classified as Marital. 🙄 Divorce cost me ~2/3rds of my net worth. (Was on track to retire by 45 and now can't even consider it until 65.) Getting married basically undid every smart career/financial decision in my life.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/26 08:07 AM
1

God, so similar. Ugh. I think we married the same damn person. I came back from a trip once with my oldest son. He was young -- like 3yo -- and we were away from home for over a week. He missed her cause he's just a baby. Anyway, we get home and she was worried about us possibly being exposed to Covid on the plane. No symptoms, just an abstract concern. She made him stay across the room from her while he cried out for her. He was bawling into my chest. Like, my shirt was soaked through with his …
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/26 08:48 PM
2

Holy shite I could have written that 2nd half word-for-word myself...
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/26 12:02 PM
1

My ex is the same. How is the kids' relationship with her?
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/26 11:58 AM
19

Similar situation. 200k vs 60k. She was never a SAHM and we neutered my career during the marriage to support hers. She gets $3k/mo for 16 years then $2k/mo forever. Her home will be paid off when she's my age (45), my home will be paid off when I'm 72.(And in the meantime I'll pay her enough to buy a second home.) We spent $200k of my savings on lawyers. The system will a absolutely destroy you financially. Edit: Missouri
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/26 12:15 PM
12

Yeah, when you know, you know. 6 months is a small investment. You're dodging a bullet, Neo.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/26 09:28 AM
1

Oh wow we are like in the almost exact same situation financially. I also have to cover 70% of all kids bills. And she was never a SAHM. It's utter nonsense.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/26 02:39 PM
14

If someone I'm seeing reaches out to my ex, that's a massive red flag. We'd be done.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/26 12:29 PM
3

We live and learn, brother.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/26 12:37 PM
11

Same. It's amazing that we take our entire net worth and do the equivalent of betting it all on black. 50% of marriages fail, and yet it's somehow billed as financially prudent because of taxes?! What utter nonsense. No high earner should ever get married. Like, ever.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/26 01:39 AM
7

Almost 3 years into my bullshit and it keeps going.
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/26 02:19 AM
6

May I one day achieve this enlightenment...
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 12:57 AM
3

MO. Alimony here via courts cannot have an end date. So I have to go back to court to argue she doesn't need it anymore. But if she never gets a better job or marries someone else, the default is for it to stay. (She can also argue cost of living increases to try to get more if I make more money.)
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/26 12:23 PM
17

This happened to me, and then you get wrecked in divorce, even if you've been trying to get her a job the whole time. She takes a third of my income, forever, off a 9 year marriage. 😭 The one thing I will say -- plan your exit. Split married and separate accounts. Keep things clean. Talk to a lawyer. And try to get through it quickly. Going to court makes everyone lose (and the lawyers win).
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/26 03:08 AM
2

Oof. No advice. Good luck my dude.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/26 02:37 AM
20

That's called a cake eater -- the worst kind. They don't cheat cause the bedroom is dead or the romance is gone, they just do it just for the thrill. Someone doesn't become a cake eater overnight. Unless she's clinically a psychopath, most people go through a protracted loop of cheating, guilt, and rationalization, until they get to the point where they're comfortable being passionate with their partner and someone else at the same time. It's very likely she's been cheating for most of the marri…
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/26 09:41 PM
7

We have the same ex. I could copy and paste that and it would be accurate, to the letter.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/26 12:11 PM
20

There's always another sucker. She's got me on the hook paying her until she's 52. That's most of the way through life. And she'll surely have some other idiot paying for her by then. It's just how these leeches operate. But try as she might, she can't replace me as their father. So long as I keep showing up for the boys, there's nothing she can do. And I will give them a much better life than she ever could.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/26 12:09 PM
6

Pretty sure you're fucked but get a lawyer immediately.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/26 11:35 AM
25

Life is much better. I'm much poorer. But life is much better.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 02:05 AM
3

Therapy. Gym. Lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/26 02:01 AM
1

I wish. I am court ordered not to. (Kids)
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/26 12:20 PM
1

Loving this for you and I agree. Kids should live with the responsible one. My ex hasn't tried to increase her income at all since separation. But if they said "the kids can't live with you until you can pay the mortgage," she'd be able to get 25k more in a heartbeat.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/26 12:33 AM
1

Honestly, I have no idea. Small town. The judge's wife gets paid for work by ex's sister. Her whole family is lawyers and she spent $160k on her lawyer. And I make a lot compared to her, so that's all they focused on.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/26 12:19 AM
5

Wait, I can just not pay this?
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/26 10:26 PM
3

$3300 for me with 50/50 and her never having been a SAHM and we prioritized her career throughout the marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/26 12:47 AM
3

You park your ass on the fucking couch and only move if your lawyer says so.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/26 04:06 AM
2

I do. She takes money every month from me that I would otherwise spend on the kids. I don't like people stealing from my kids.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 09:19 AM
6

My only regret is not doing it sooner
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/26 03:22 AM
6

With a prenup, yes. All my pain has been financial.
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/26 12:43 PM
5

Oddly enough, this is how my therapist suggested I look at it. I invested a ton in a "business" and it failed, costing me greatly. There's nothing that can really change that. So my only choices are: lost hundreds of thousands and beat myself up over it daily, or lost hundreds of thousands and don't Treat it as a write off. A failed venture. Look forward. Recover. Refresh. Renew. You never would have guessed you'd end up here 20 years ago, and you didn't know where you'll be in 20 years. At leas…
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/26 04:07 AM
5

Sometimes, you have to hit rock bottom in order to push off and swim uo. It sucks being there, but there's a good chance you can grow and thrive in ways that she can't - it just takes time. Time and effort, the way water can carve through rock. The way mountains disappear under wind and rain. The way coal hardens to diamond. The universe bends to small, consistent acts. And men are good at that. Even in the darkest hour, when the world is grey and closing in, men put one foot in front of the oth…
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/26 09:40 AM
1

Modifiable with no end date. The burden of proof is on me to show she doesn't need the money.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/26 01:14 PM
1

Post-nuptial agreement, maybe? But you're unlikely to get anywhere unless you're James Bond with misdirection
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/26 04:56 AM
1

I don't understand why they can do this. There should be a national cap on alimony to only ever bring someone up to the median local income. It would fix so much of this bullshit.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/26 04:51 AM
3

Amicable is a blessing if you can manage it. Get through it, thank her, and move on.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/26 04:35 AM
2

If I could have one wish, it's that a similar fate would befall my leech of an ex.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/26 04:31 AM
3

Mine was similar, but in MO. There's a requirement about being able to meet "reasonable needs". I make 220k, her 58k. Even with 2 experts saying she could make more, she managed to convince the judge she couldn't, AND she bullshitted her expenses by 2x. (The judge's threw out a third of it and it wasn't enough.) I'm paying $2100/mo post-tax alimony for "reasonable needs" and all of it goes right into her savings account. It's absolute nonsense. Be very careful.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/26 04:25 AM
1

I am in a similar situation. Used to join startups hoping to hit it big. Can't do that anymore. Marrying the wrong person has basically destroyed the second half of my life.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 02:36 AM
6

Fuck them, but more importantly, prioritize you. Are you going to be better by releasing everything, or will it attract a bunch of hate and drama? Are you going to heal more with some form of revenge, or will you heal more by focusing on the future? (These are legitimate questions, I'm not trying to lead to anything.) They were selfish. Time for you to be selfish. Do what's best for you, period. Whether it fucks them over or shows them mercy is completely ancillary.
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 07:22 AM
11

This doesn't make it better, but FWIW my dad had much less than 50% with me and he was by far the dominant influence in my life. Just focus on being 100% dad when you can. You do the best you can, for as long as you can, and when you finally can't, you do the next best thing. You back up, you don't give up.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/25 10:54 PM
11

I don't want children Vasectomy. Immediately. Take control of that.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/25 12:47 AM
8

Yeah. I paid her way through life -- 2 cars, a house, a master's degree, and loads of disposable income on top of that. She'd be nothing without me, which is why she dug her claws in so tight during the divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/25 10:35 PM
3

Believe it or not, entirely by hand. (Though I did pick up habits of bolding and italicizing recently from LLMs)
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/25 10:30 PM
7

44 and casually dating maybe 4-6 women. 3 were in-person, the rest apps. The apps don't tend to provide long term results, but a rotating cast of dates/hookups. My best advice is to focus on the pipeline. Use the Circles Method. You need to have it so that you're regularly mingling with friends of friends and getting warm intros. So if you don't have a good social circle, start there. Really lean into any hobbies that put you and strangers together -- ideally strangers in similar life situations…
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/25 12:58 PM
10

Cause you get the friend part, and it's cheaper.
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/25 12:08 PM
10

My biggest mistake was not getting mine after the first kid. I knew I only wanted one. Listen to yourself, guys. Whether you want zero or 5, just be very honest with yourself and take appropriate action. Ex wife got me drunk one night and all of a sudden we had two.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/25 03:14 AM
3

There's no assets to split. It'll depend on the incomes. If it's similar, with a 50/50 split nobody might have to pay anything. If you make much more, they'll take it all unless you get a lawyer to argue successfully to impute her salary. Expect to lose all your money. They'll take whatever they can get. I lost about 800k, all told.
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/25 01:37 AM
2

Similar story. Expected a low conflict divorce. First lawyer was cheap. He sucked. Called around lawyers and told them the situation, asking for recommendations. A name kept popping up, so I went with him. Fantastic. I still lost big -- mostly due to damage from stuff I signed while with the first lawyer -- but my lawyer was able to cut the losses.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/25 02:01 PM
5

Your only foothold is if any of these men abuse your son or do drugs around him. The courts won't care about the religion part, to be honest. You have to frame it in terms of safety for the kid. But I'll be honest, there's probably little you can do other than being a good example of the Muslim you want your son to become. He will be exposed to all sorts of things you don't want - it's your job to teach him right from wrong so he can protect himself.
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/25 03:04 PM
2

Mind if I ask what decade you're in (30s? 40s? 50s?) Stir has been best for me, but the quality is low. Bumble has been hit or miss. It requires way too much effort. Tinder has been almost pointless.
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/25 02:46 PM
3

Truly awful. I wish you all the strength and peace in the world. I'm 2 years in to the same thing, and hoping it eventually ends.
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/25 09:14 PM
10

I think you need therapy my dude. It's true there's another sucker born every minute, but that applies across the board, and you choose to make money legitimately, not by lying to gullible suckers, right? Just because infinite simps exist doesn't mean every woman is going to coast on them. Yours did. Others might not. Divorce is a balance beam between "it's all women's fault" and "it's all my fault". Your job is to stay on the beam.
/r/Divorce_Men11/11/25 10:28 AM
0

It doesn't have anything to do with him, actually. We get along great. Your skydaddy just doesn't exist.
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/25 12:49 PM
3

I wouldn't stress. I went to church every week for a decade, arriving 20 minutes early so my Uber Catholic dad could talk to me about the importance of God, and I still ended up an atheist. Hah! Far more important is teaching your kid to be a critical thinker. (And not only for religious reasons. Our kids are growing up in a world where fake videos will be virtually indistinguishable from reality. They need rational skepticism now more than ever.)
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/25 11:49 PM
3

My first one was awful. My second was great. He really tried hard to get us to settle, though. Trial is expensive and the outcomes are not under control -- the same case presented to 5 judges will have 5 different results. When we couldn't settle, my lawyer advocated for me. Settling is the only way to control the outcome. But if your ex is a vortex of entitlement like mine, and refuses to compromise, expect to lose tons of money on wasted negotiations.
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/25 03:01 PM
8

That sucks, bro. Did you smash?
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/25 11:21 AM
2

It's even worse in MO. I have them 50/50 but I'm required to pay child support AND required to pay 75% of child-related bills (like summer care, soccer, etc). I feel like it should be either split bills proportionally or pay CS, but not both.
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/25 10:42 AM
1

Jesus. I'm extremely worried I'll be in the same position. Took it to trial and waiting on results.
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/25 10:38 AM
3

150k and counting... It's eating into a large part of my retirement.
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/25 12:50 PM
1

Waiting for final judgement and these stories are like mana from heaven. Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/25 03:47 AM
6

This is honestly uplifting. I'm in a similar boat (numbers and all), but my divorce is finalizing in a couple months (went to trial). I really hope she continues being the lazy entitled POS that she is, so that I can later sue and get full custody. Cut out the rot.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/25 07:31 PM
3

20 years and 7 kids. I hope she makes as much as you cause otherwise you're in for a rude awakening. Dudes will be railing your ex in a house that you're actively paying for, and there will be nothing legal you can do about it. And that's your best case scenario. False accusations can literally put you in jail or take away your kids forever.
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/25 03:25 PM
2

Yes, use the app. And insist on it. You can coordinate everything regarding kids on the app. No more texting or calls or in-person conversations. And bring it up to the lawyers if she ignores that. Entitled ex's will constantly demand more than their fair share. Start saying "no" and never stop. Let her know it brings you joy to say No. Let it bring you joy to say no! Pay attention to that feeling of fairness that you suppress in order to survive, and just say no. They need you waaaaaaaay more t…
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/25 01:06 PM
1

MO. It's indefinite by default. If you do not reach an agreement and a judge decides the maintenance issue after a trial, any maintenance award is very likely to be modifiable. This means that the maintenance obligation goes on indefinitely with no end date The Court cannot and will not order nonmodifiable maintenance. The only maintenance they can Order if the matter proceeds to trial is modifiable maintenance During mediation, they use the threat of lifetime alimony to try to get an absurd amo…
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/25 07:22 PM
7

It IS bonkers. My ex has a rich family, a master's degree, was never a SAHM, and we spent 7 of the 9 years of marriage supporting her career (at the expense of mine) -- and she wants alimony for the rest of her life(!) I only hope the judge can see through her bs.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/25 03:28 AM
1

PRENUPTIAL AGREEMENT! The worst thing about divorce is losing an absurd amount of retirement and alimony to someone who's capable but lazy. Just insist on a prenup. If she's the right person, she'll agree. If she wants your money, she won't.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/25 05:57 PM
1

Just finished my divorce trial. Couldn't believe all the excuses she had for not being able to get a better job. Just this constant stream of entitled bullshit. Hopefully the judge sees through it. We'll find out when the judgement comes.
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/25 02:33 PM
2

They don't ever stop. Just have to keep fighting. I fought hard back from supervised visitations to 50/50. You have to be the perfect parent. Fighting on the financial side now. It sucks.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/25 08:35 PM
5

I too was once naive to think I could get through it without lawyers. $120k and 17 months later I'm still in it. At the very least, you need a lawyer to tell you where your biggest risks are. A person who "treats you like shit" might just decide to continue that in the divorce, especially if they think they can get some of your retirement accounts or alimony. I'm not sure how Arizona does it, but in Missouri it doesn't matter if finances were "separate," it's all considered marital as soon as yo…
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/25 10:08 AM
6

You'd lose unless that same cohabitation provision is in the agreement itself. But once it's in the agreement, it's not really "alimony" anymore from a legal perspective, it's just money you owe her from a court order. My advice: check the exact text of your agreement, and if the clause isn't there, let it go.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/25 11:56 AM
9

Wish I read this advice 15 years ago.
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/25 07:49 AM
3

Lawyer. In certain cases inheritance is not marital so long as you never mix it or use any marital money to access/maintain it. You also could get a post-nuptial agreement, but that's probably unlikely. You absolutely need to talk to a lawyer, cause if you co-mingle that money, it'll become half hers. It may already be, depending on the state.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/25 12:47 PM
1

This, agreed. Except I would have gone full crazy. I should have had a lawyer willing to play as dirty as her.
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/24 05:37 AM
6

God no, fuck that unrepentant leech. Divorce was the best decision I ever made and my only regret is not doing it sooner.
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/24 05:07 AM
3

15 years without her working is probably a maintenance case. She could easily get 20-30% of your gross salary for a minimum of 7 years. More if you have kids. My ex got the house entirely, no split, and will be getting another $300k over the next 15 years. And she was never a stay at home mom. 🫤 The system is wildly unfair. You may really want a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/24 10:27 PM
1

Counterpoint: sometimes not giving money to someone who'll waste it IS what's best for your family. I'd rather put the money in a 529...
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/24 02:27 PM
5

2 kids, 9 years, Missouri. Settled before trial. I had to fight false accusations and multiple attempts to Total lawyer costs: around $50k Total immediate costs (in house/car/retirement accts) ~$450k. Total expected costs including all alimony and child support over 15 years: $800k Net worth when divorce was filed: $1.1M It took me 25 years to build all that. She was petty right to the very end. Worth every penny to be free from that monster.
/r/Divorce_Men28/11/24 12:08 PM
1

What advice would you give a best friend who's trash ex still rents space in his head for free? Take that advice.
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/24 10:00 AM
6

Heads up that divorce sucks before it gets better. It does get better - a LOT better. I'm much happier now. But my darkest days were after I decided to file and before everything was settled. But in the end, what would you pay to have YOU back? By that metric it's a bargain.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/24 10:35 PM
6

Once your lawyer says it's ok, then it's ok. And believe me it feels great to not share the same space anymore. But don't do it until the lawyer is cool with it. Fuck whatever she wants.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 12:55 AM
2

Lawyer lawyer lawyer! And even consider moving to a state that's more "friendly" for divorce. You can lose 3/4 of your net worth. Ask me how I know...
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/24 08:31 AM
6

Try to get everyone to move to a state that's better for high income divorces, like Indiana. The first year or two suck but I'm so much happier. Divorces cost a lot because they're worth it.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 11:30 AM
7

Good for her. Now if only she'd depend on Mr. New Guy financially, that would be great. What's that, court system? I still have to pay all her bills? FML...
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/24 09:45 PM
9

Marriage without a pre-nup is a terrible choice for everyone. It invites the government into your relationship and binds you to laws that haven't even been written yet.
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/24 06:57 PM
4

I'm getting financially wrecked and will probably live less years overall because I won't have as much retirement, but it's still 100% worth it. I was always going to be an ATM to her. At least now I can ignore the self-centered manipulation.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/24 05:15 AM
2

You do the best you can for as long as you can, and when you finally can't, you do the next best thing. You back up, you don't give up. - Chuck Yeager
/r/Divorce_Men19/07/24 10:14 AM
4

I'm 10 months in to this madness, and yeah, it gets better. It gets real fucking dark for a bit, but eventually it gets better.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 10:36 PM
9

Divorce lawyer is critical. In some states, it doesn't even matter if one party is a complete cheat. You might still get put through the ringer if you make more. Don't leave the house until a lawyer tells you it's ok.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 06:15 AM
3

Best decision I ever made. Should have done it sooner.
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/24 02:33 PM
1

There was a guy at my office 13 years ago who would fly there and back every other week. He had 50/50 kids, week on, week off, with some kind of housing/roommate setup to be able to pull this off. I figured it would be exhausting, but it all depends on how you see it. If you like the big city life and traveling, you might look forward to an adventurous work arrangement. I have no idea if your field allows for such things, but in general my advice would be to get creative and pour energy into sol…
/r/Divorce_Men29/02/24 01:39 PM
7

Dead bedroom, emotionally abusive relationship here. If I divide it out it's probably something around $11k/lay over 14 years. Definitely not worth it.
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/24 11:51 AM
1

I was in this exact situation, also in MO, and made the mistake of having kids. Get out now while you can. She'll get half of everything and it'll take a year or more and cost tens of thousands, but it'll be worth it. The controlling ones are incredibly bad in divorces. My ex is doing everything in her power to take the kids. The sooner you leave, the sooner you'll be on the other side of hell.
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/24 10:55 AM
7

That truly sucks, dude. I don't have much advice, other than something my therapist suggested to me that helps a bit. For all of this that you wrote, and when you think about it over and over again, try prefacing it with "The story I tell myself is..." It puts some distance between you and the part of your brain that's on fire trying to piece together everything. And yeah dude, the person you fell in love with is gone. You have to give yourself permission to grieve. Mourn the loss. But also real…
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/24 06:15 AM
1

I learned "she's not your friend anymore" the hard way. My ex is wildly exaggerating and weaponizing my mental health challenges to take the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/24 01:31 PM
12

Screen for a good lawyer to write you a prenup.
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/24 06:28 AM
1

Lawyer and therapist. Don't focus on what she's demanding, let the lawyer deal with it. That's what you're paying them for. She will demand everything under the sun, and will use the kids as leverage. Don't worry about it. She only gets it if you freak out and say or do something stupid (like I did). Get a lawyer and do whatever they tell you, to the letter. Be a perfect parent and go out of your way to foster the kids' relationship with her. Judges weigh that heavily. You can absolutely lose ev…
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 03:11 PM
1

Yeah, that's smart. Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/24 01:29 PM
1

Live as frugally as possible This part I'm unsure about. It seems like alimony is calculated based on need and ability to pay -- if I have a big mortgage and car payment, shouldn't that help me by making it so I don't have the money to spare for her?
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/24 04:42 AM
2

Endure the pain and first and finally realize it will be worth it. I am trying very hard to imagine this perspective. But in the middle of it, it's extremely difficult. I keep imagining myself destitute while she enjoys wine clubs and expensive vacations on "child support."
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/24 04:40 AM
1

I know all this but I appreciate hearing it again. Truly. The more often I hear it the more likely it'll stick. Thanks.
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/24 03:08 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter