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View 6 posts and 271 comments by tim_rp on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Absolutely. No battles here. This is a definite win.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/17 07:45 AM
1

Absolutely. No battles here. This is a definite win.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/17 07:45 AM
1

Nearly a week into new job routine, she's moaning about it but not shit testing. As per /u/persaeus suggestion, I think she's secretly enjoying it.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/17 08:25 PM
1

An Americanism (localized?) that I've never heard before. Having looked it up, and delivered with the right accent this isperfect.
/r/askMRP30/04/17 07:56 PM
6

It's your Napoleon complex that makes you react so negatively to being called "boss" or "chief". That said, the correct retort would be to call the waiter "boy" or "son". Or "garçon" if you want to be more subtle.
/r/askMRP29/04/17 11:12 AM
1

My biggest challenge that I'm currently working on (after this weakness was pointed out), remaining engaged and focused in situations I'm apathetic towards, i.e. situations where I don't feel like I have control/power/input/etc. Your OYS post gives me some awesome context related to the above. During my formative youth, the Gen X cynical-apathy-towards-everything was right at its peak and I think I never shook that mindset completely. (If you don't know what I mean, watch an old episode of Frien…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/04/17 01:48 AM
4

If you can't enforce the boundary, then it's not a boundary.
/r/askMRP27/04/17 09:37 AM
1

give listening to be passionate a go Can you clarify what you mean by this?
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/17 12:52 AM
1

It's really easy. I know. Yet I'm still a fucktard about this. I'm of the belief passion is something you find, not something you possess. I 100% get it that this is a significant barrier to me leading an awesome life. But I don't think the answer to the problem is going to be found through anything but introspection coupled with forcing myself to step outside my comfort zone. Also, don't be so defeatist regarding your wife. Look up operand conditioning and apply. Not defeatist. Realistic. The o…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/17 12:39 AM
1

What's interesting for me is that your OYS doesn't really have good problem definition...I get the sense that you're following a plan for the sake of following a plan. You might be close to the mark here. I found MAP at a low point where I really was a solid fuckup. But 12-18 months prior to that I thought my life was okay. Sure, I was frustrated that my wife didn't fuck me as much as I wanted. And I was on an okay career and financial trajectory but moving more slowly than I would have liked. O…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/17 11:49 PM
1

It would certainly give me some perspective.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/17 05:53 AM
1

I've followed up after my meetings with small thank you gifts and hand written cards (all of the meetings have been with women). Puts a whole new meaning to career beta. Seriously, though, in what industry is gifts for your interviewer a thing?
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/17 03:44 AM
2

I just trimmed my nails and I've been biting my nails for 25 years. Congrats, bro. I bit my nails for most of my teens and early twenties. The only advice I can give is to watch yourself if you ever find a little rough edge on your nail. I find that it's tempting to use your teeth to even things up a bit but before you know it you're grinding away at a stub on your finger.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/17 03:41 AM
1

My wife still pretends she doesn't understand it.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/17 03:20 AM
1

New MAP I mentioned a couple of weeks ago - my original MAP goals are more or less achieved and I'm in the process of giving my MAP a more extensive overhaul. I've come to the realisation that on my current trajectory I'm now a good beta. My initial MAP was about eliminating bad beta traits from my life but on an alpha/beta scale I've moved from the bad alpha/bad beta quadrant to the bad alpha/good beta quadrant. A couple of weeks ago I laid out the basics of my revised MAP: Kick ass in my new j…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/17 02:09 AM
1

This is pretty much my industry standard. Actually, after doing some more research it seems the missing ingredient in my wardrobe is blazers. So I might need to get a couple of those. Unfortunately, they're expensive, damnit. But a couple of nice patterned/textured blazers should give me that ever so slightly edgy look nicely.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/17 12:51 AM
1

/u/hellome99 THIS is the post you need to absorb. You know your mindset isn't quite right. Here's why.
/r/askMRP25/04/17 08:56 PM
1

I posted this the other day to /r/redpillworkplace but there doesn't seem to be the traffic there, so cross posting here. ... I'm starting a new job in a week and am in the process of updating wardrobe. Though both the old and new environments are officially "smart casual", the new job requires decidedly more "smart" attire. My old work uniform involved slim, dark jeans; fitted dress shirts, untucked; no tie; polished black leather loafers; plain v-neck knits and a grey peacoat for the colder mo…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/17 10:22 PM
1

whitener Anyone have experience with this sort of stuff? Does it work? Teeth are absolutely my weak point in the hygiene scale.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/17 12:42 AM
1

An old boss used to lend me his Z4 when he went on holiday. The kid loved me dropping him to preschool from the front seat of a convertible. Then again, with the 2 seater it used to shit me that you couldn't move the seat back.
/r/askMRP21/04/17 10:29 PM
1

This might help: http://lmgtfy.com/?q=a%26a+redpill
/r/askMRP21/04/17 07:38 AM
1

*cough* wanker! Go the 2-seater. Enjoy the extra boot space.
/r/askMRP21/04/17 06:58 AM
2

This post comes at me like a shot in the arm. So much of the shit I do, so much of the shit I think, is because I care so much about what I think is best for the kids. Yes, is comes at the expense of my happiness but it's 100% in my power to control what does and doesn't make me happy. I could ditch the family, move to Asia, buy a motorbike and ride it to Paris. I'd be pretty unhappy about how I left my family but it would be 100% my choice. It would still be a freaking awesome thing to do. It's…
/r/askMRP21/04/17 02:29 AM
3

Agree with this. Most comments in this thread are about how she broke some sacred bond of trust by reading. Is it just me or is this placing too much importance on the diary. She found it; she read it. Whatever. As long as OP DGAF, he should be fine. when my wife's behaviour towards me changed drastically, towards a point where one could call it domestic abuse Seems to me like OP has bigger fish to fry.
/r/askMRP20/04/17 11:21 PM
2

Let's not beat around the bush. Rollo is verbose but not challenging. If you're struggling you need to try harder. But not by much. WISNIFG is a good deal more challenging from a linguistic perspective and you ploughed through that, right? Right?
/r/askMRP16/04/17 12:38 PM
5

Don't just limit yourself to texting. I have been working to sexualise interaction with my wife across the board. The way I see it, it's a reminder that sex is part and parcel with the relationship. There's SO much opportunity for double entendres if you look for it. But you can also be funny. I was making play dough shapes with the kids the other day. I sneakily made a stick man with massive cock and balls and left it out for my wife. She had given a hard no that morning leaving me in pretty mu…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/04/17 12:16 AM
1

i don't get this and i'm trying to figure out what doesn't make sense here. is your result dependent on other people? that doesn't make sense to me. if she doesn't respond in the right way - does that shoot your shit out of the water? I think you're right here. One of my objectives is dependent on another person. And that's a bad strategy because it's something I can't inherently control. if you're that far along and didn't have a goal, why are you doing any of this? Those 'then what?' questions…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/04/17 01:30 AM
1

Okay, so now I know what her life will be like. What do you want for you? (Aside from a holiday in SE Asia.)
/r/MarriedRedPill13/04/17 05:58 AM
1

looks to me like the cart is a couple miles in front of the horse. My post is about planning for the future, not about accelerating through the remaining dread levels. In terms of action, I still have much work to do and the pace remains unchanged. But I have spent the past week taking stock and I think I'm on the right track. The key point is that I don't currently have a vision for my life that doesn't involve my wife. If I get to Dread Level 9-10 in due time and don't get the result I want, t…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/17 11:12 PM
1

I'm in the process of generating a new MAP, which has me in a reflective mood at the moment. I'm thinking a lot about my progress, successes and continued frustrations. I think I need to better consider what my objectives in all of this are. /u/weakandsensitive 's post on defining hard mode struck a chord with me, particularly the idea of framing a marriage around three aspects - the good parent, the good spouse and the lover. The truth is, I want the trifecta. I want to have - and to be - all t…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/17 07:14 AM
1

men build men, women build relationships. You just corrected a piece of upside-down thinking in me.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/04/17 04:45 AM
1

OP earns a non-USD salary?
/r/askMRP11/04/17 04:08 AM
2

I can see value in me having this conversation with my wife...at some point in the future. It's very non-threatening and very easy to understand. The subtext is powerful - "you tick two of three boxes, keep doing what you're doing if you want but the third one will be ticked elsewhere".
/r/MarriedRedPill11/04/17 02:07 AM
1

She called me because I was off doing fun stuff. I get what you and /u/[deleted] are saying, but let me explain. I follow the text-for-logistics rule rigorously. But I relaxed it slightly this once because my wife is a child who can't verbalise her feelings rationally. Over five messages (three hers) I ended her three day rage, which would have taken much more time and effort had I engaged over the phone. I'm now considering whether I should use text as a tool to lead her to better behaviour in …
/r/MarriedRedPill10/04/17 09:21 PM
1

You know, the "what if it's not me and it is her" question has been weighing on me the past few days. I ended up taking the kids away without her and not long after I left she texted me an excerpt from an article. She'd clearly googled "why am I being so stubborn" and it was the first one that came up. The thing is, it described her to a T and I realised her irrational stubbornness is deeply intertwined with her low self esteem. Those traits that will never change but there's probably room for m…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/04/17 01:37 AM
2

What shits me about this reply is that I know you're right. The advice sails pretty close to "just accept you're not going to get the sex you want and do something else" which is a bitter pill to swallow.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/04/17 01:02 AM
1

I'd love to do an MBA. I reckon it's the degree I'd enjoy doing the most. But I suspect something more technical/specialised would offer a significantly better cost/benefit. (I already have an undergrad business degree.) New role is actually working for a government agency, which is a new world for me. It means there will be lots of opportunity for me but from a fairly fixed scope.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/04/17 08:49 PM
1

Yeah, I believe my new role offers a bunch of grad cert level course options where they'll pay. I'll know more when I start but hopefully there's something there that aligns with career goals and would enable me to evolve the study to a masters degree on the cheap.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/04/17 09:39 PM
1

I am at least kind of awesome, as judged by the standards I set for myself. And I'm absolutely working on areas that I've identified as opportunities. But yeah, not enough yet obviously.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/04/17 03:11 AM
7

While I generally agree with the above, what I love about this sub is that it doesn't seek to bitch and moan about the state of the world today. Don't get angry. Get to work instead.
/r/askMRP07/04/17 12:07 AM
1

This is a really helpful post, thanks. ...verbalizing how she provides value is necessary to start figuring out if it's her or you who is the problem. I was about to make a point about how hard it is to know whether I'm the problem or she's the problem. But actually, you already answered that. you've lifted for at least a year and look good, after you know you can interest other women.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/17 11:52 PM
2

This pretty much hits the nail on the head. Could I go out and get another pussy tomorrow? Probably not. I need to work on that.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/17 11:48 PM
1

meh, I am not so sure of this based on your writeup. If your frame is "I got better things to do than burn a week of vaca with a no-sex harpy"; and you just stated I am doing "X" without whining about this is because x,y,z . . . then I think your fine. This is certainly how I projected it, but I think the loss of frame comes from reacting from a position of butthurt, and, as I said, "weaponising" my time and attention. Weak behaviour. she just doesn't give a fuck, you're not attractive (to her) …
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/17 11:47 PM
2

Am I allowed two OYS posts in a week? I'm sure this is cheating but I have shit to own. Despite the happy note of my earlier post, I've broken frame like a little bitch for the first time in ages. It was an epic example of shooting one's self in the foot. After a solid week of hard rejections, I told my wife I wouldn't be going on the holiday (visiting family) we have planned for tomorrow. This was some kind of dumb play at weaponising my attention and it's going to backfire on me spectacularly …
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/17 06:47 AM
1

That being said those three bullet points shouldn't make me want to end everything No, they shouldn't in and of themselves. (Nor should what some guy on the internet says.) But you really do need to understand why we say these things here.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/17 10:44 PM
3

Okay so: LDR Post wall GF with significant baggage Bad case of Oneitis Clearly you know those things are frowned upon here but do you understand why? I mean do you really understand why? I catch myself holding on to blue pill ideals too but here's the thing - that doesn't change reality. That's what the 'red pill' metaphor is all about. Being shown the truth, whether you like it or not. There's no room to agree or disagree. You should read the Rational Male - Year One. Here's the first chapter, …
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/17 06:39 AM
1

What are you holding on to?
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/17 04:30 AM
1

She mentioned she thought I would never do it.... That leads me to the conclusion my dread did not work at all as the idea I could leave did not cross her mind. Knowing this now, would you change anything you've done in the past? If so, what?
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/17 04:29 AM
1

Also started light cardio 2 weeks ago and put it in the 60 DOD as a new habit I am forming. I've been thinking I need to do something along these lines too. What are you doing and how has it felt so far?
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/17 04:02 AM
1

Yes. Never forget that if she does not SEE the money, she will not spend the money. Absolutely. We have separate accounts right now and the way it currently works is her salary less rent is her play money. Compared to what I've been covering on my part time salary this is generous. I cover all bills, vehicle expenses, most groceries and family entertainment. She just puts fuel in her car. I plan to continue the current situation. More money will be available to her but it will come through me. T…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/17 03:55 AM
2

It's been a fucker of a journey which really started when I lost my last full time job 3 years ago. Hit rock bottom in the middle there somewhere which ultimately led me to finding MRP. 18 months later and with the first phase down, I'm still only at the beginning.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/17 03:24 AM
2

Oh there will be tears. Not about money but just the reality of both working full time, juggling kids etc. There's only so much I can do to smooth those bumps.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/17 12:56 AM
1

I actually touched on wife's lack of financial acumen in last week's OYS. I structured our life so our rent comes out of her account which reduces her scope to spend like a maniac. A good thing as she has zero financial discipline and only the vaguest sense of the value of money beyond "gets me what I want right now". I've downplayed the windfall but she knows it's there. She knows my objective is bringing savings back up but you can bet the farm she'll test my resolve on that. On the upside, I'…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/04/17 10:08 PM
2

I want to do a postgraduate degree but need to work out whether the ROI justifies the cost.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/04/17 12:42 PM
16

A big, big win this week. For the past few months my #1 goal has been sorting my shitty job situation and my deeply intertwined shitty financial situation. I just received and accepted a good job offer. It’s been three years since I last worked full time and the job itself is very much in line with the career trajectory I was on back then. Solid six-figure salary, lots of opportunity to grow with the role and I'm pumped to get started. Financially, I've been going backwards for a long time and I…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/04/17 10:54 AM
2

You're not the only one who's had his eyes pried wide open by that blog post.
/r/askMRP29/03/17 09:21 AM
8

She simply doesn't notice or care about what I do or that I'm not as available to her. She just sits on the couch all night and watches TV and goes to bed very late at night after I'm already asleep. Furthermore she seems to be perfectly content doing this. So here's the question - why are you being less available? Is it because you've got better shit to do or is it because you're angling to change her behaviour. I struggle with this question myself. Often. If she's content being a low value wom…
/r/askMRP24/03/17 03:21 AM
1

I'd definitely agree with what you and /r/jdroedell (Here you go, BTW) are saying about needing a base level of financial security. Funny thing is, I think in her mind we are financially secure. We're sitting on a healthy home deposit in cash for when we can afford a mortgage, so her attitude is very much "well, we're not buying a house right now so that money is there to be spent". She just can't comprehend its future value in any real way. AWALT, I guess. So I don't think it's terror. The fina…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/03/17 01:11 AM
2

It's been a couple of weeks since my last OYS so it's probably worth me getting something down on paper, so to speak. Good shit CAREER: I committed a few weeks ago to get the hell out of my part-time job and go back to full time work at a salary commensurate with my capabilities. I seem to be doing really well here. Have had tonnes of phone conversations, one coffee and three interviews in the last three weeks. The most recent one is for an awesome job and exactly the kind of thing I want. In th…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/03/17 12:13 AM
5

You are operating in her frame I see your point. Cheers.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/03/17 12:02 AM
3

Why are you worried about coming off as sarcastic? I'm concerned my A&A comes off as smarmy or butthurt rather than amused by her childishness. "can't this weekend. I promised your sister/friend/Whoever in her circle I'd spend the weekend with her" See I don't think I can pull this off with any kind of credibility. I get that the response is in my frame but this kind of talk would just make me look like a tryhard. I could do something serious like "if you're angry at me for expressing what I wan…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/03/17 11:33 PM
4

ID should treat this as a soft no - this time. If you're working your magic, get this response, work your magic tomorrow and get No'd again, treat second No as a hard no. Don't feed this bullshit anymore, and at this point bullshit is what it is. Noob needs to know his history. If this has happened a lot, treat it as a hard no. If sex hasn't started improving, treat it as hard no. Be prepared to hold frame against an epic shitstorm right then and there, or the next day. But hold frame and give z…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/03/17 10:17 PM
1

Dude, calories/kilojoules are consideration number 1 for weight control. Number 1. Cutting lactose and gluten is only beneficial if you're sensitive to those ingredients. Made from scratch is all good but fat used in cooking (or not trimmed from meat) can hide tonnes of calories in your food. Portion sizes is the other one, especially carb-heavy side dishes like roasted potatoes, rice and pasta.
/r/askMRP17/03/17 09:05 PM
1

(casseroles, curry's, roast dinners etc) Just watch yourself on this. This may seem healthy compared to prefab, highly processed meals but I find these three examples specifically can be hidden calorie bombs. All three tend to be high fat and accompanied by tasty, tasty carbs. I can't find the source but I read somewhere about a "golden ratio" of fat and carbs that tends to make food moreish. (1:1?)
/r/askMRP16/03/17 10:15 PM
2

This is pretty much the way I've been operating. And if the issue was purely physical, then yeah - instant relief. The problem, I've identified, is that the need for sex isn't purely physical. It's a need to have my need for sex validated. i.e. It's validation-seeking, requiring much more personal reflection and willpower to overcome.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/03/17 02:32 AM
2

So I have some clear areas to work on this week. The good: MAP course correction In last week's post I outlined how my MAP was off course, and that the first goal was addressing my personal dissatisfaction with my career. In short, I need a new job. The process has begun in earnest and the results are looking okay. I've updated my resume and applied for several jobs. No callbacks on that front but the website I applied through seems to flag you as an 'active' jobseeker, so I've had several out o…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/03/17 12:24 AM
1

This is just awesome. Should be in the wiki. Near the top.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/03/17 12:25 AM
1

Which book?
/r/MarriedRedPill01/03/17 12:24 AM
2

My problem is that I can't eat egg and don't like tinned tuna, which knocks out two cheap, plentiful protein sources. It's generally meat and more meat for me. (And good old whey.) I'm not from the US so have access to different brands but will see if I can find some yoghurt with more protein than carbs. I make my own sausage from venison I hunted and bacon and spices; that's nice delicious protein This is possibly the most awesome thing in the universe.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/02/17 06:56 AM
1

I would estimate your %BF right at or slightly above 20% This is higher than my own estimate and clearly exactly what I need. Bullshitting one's self is easy when the answer is somewhat subjective. My recommendation is either try a keto or lean-gains (google it for calculators, etc.) with a small calorie surplus. I'm already following an IF regimen similar to LeanGains so it would make sense to continue with that. It would just be a matter of adjusting my daily calorie intake to account for trai…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/02/17 02:08 AM
1

I've already posted about how my OHP increases predict my bench increases, and both of them benefit from accessory work, like doing dips and just doing extra sets past the 5x5. This is heartening. Recently broke an OHP plateau so feeling good about this lift at the moment. You didn't mention anything about cardio. Bro, do you cardio? Not really. Lift three times a week, occasionally go for a run but that's usually when I can't lift due to travel or whatever reason. When I started lifting I read …
/r/MarriedRedPill28/02/17 01:52 AM
2

Where do you actually stand on those goals? How exactly are you 'dieting'? What is your goal date, and how did you calculate your calorie goals to achieve that? Okay, your words have made it clear to me I could still do more. I started IF in Jan (16-8) after a few of months of mediocre results with CICO tracking. I'm NOT tracking calories right now but there's no reason I shouldn't be. (I stopped because I got bored of it and was eating in a consistent pattern anyway.) Goals - as per my OP, I ha…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/02/17 10:25 PM
1

best guesses in order of likelihood are fuckarounditis with the iron; inadequate protein consumption; and low T. Fuckarounditis: I don't know. Maybe. Following SL5x5, 3 times per week as per program. The only thing I do differently is I won't add weight until I'm at least vaguely comfortable with my form at previous weight. For example, when I add weight my butt usually comes up first out of a squat, with my back straightening a little too late. After a couple of weeks of practice I become more …
/r/MarriedRedPill26/02/17 10:15 PM
2

There is 0 sexual threat to her perfect little world where she provides her husband a "sex life still sucks" experience. Agreed. I've been leaving the house, getting out, working on projects, but even with that I think I'm just so present due to family commitments, work from home etc that my time away is just a drop in the ocean. What is your opinion on my above thoughts concerning Dread Level 4 - that availability conditioning is better thought of as a passive (or indirect) act than an overt pu…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/17 03:12 AM
3

The shock passing of a loved one outlined in my last OYS has finally started to subside this week, having spent a couple of weeks out of town helping my grieving family. I've been doing unpleasant shit that needs doing and I've done it well. I've taken leadership. I've been the oak. I'm proud of myself. Returning to home and a sense of normalcy has me re-evaluating much of my life and much has been found wanting. Our time on this earth is short and too much of mine is wasted. Goals/MAP: I'm not …
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/17 01:10 AM
1

Your grieving timeline will be a little different than the rest of the family. This is a nice perspective. Cheers.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/02/17 10:46 AM
2

I'm clearly holding frame enough now to warrant her testing it. Throw some monthly hormones into the mix and you get the above result.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/02/17 11:11 AM
1

Death does funny things to people. Even trying to take out frustrations out in the iron temple doesn't feel the same. My heart hasn't been in it this week. Missed reps everywhere. I remind myself that every single person we love either dies or sees us die and take some comfort from that. It's always one or the other who has to wear that pain. My family's loss was sudden and completely unexpected, but at least he died quick and presumably with little suffering. Being "in the middle" of losing som…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/02/17 10:54 AM
3

I can empathise. I was recently driving my wife and daughter to work and school and my wife asked "should you drop me or her first". I called her out (jokingly) and said "so what you're doing is telling me to drop you off first. Well ask me nicely and I will." She refused to ask nicely just as I was driving by her work. Keeping the joke going, I say "well, if you can't ask me nicely" and continue driving past the office, intending to turn around at the intersection just up the street. Well, shit…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/02/17 12:06 AM
2

Women love feels and they love emotional roller coasters. This. Case in point. My wife's father passed away recently. It just so happened the day he died was the 5th day straight of my wife's rejection towards my initiation. She had indicated that morning that I could jump though a few hoops to get her over the line and got shitty with me when I decided not to play that game. I leave the house and shit hits the fan a couple of hours later when the news about her dad arrives. I go straight home, …
/r/askMRP07/02/17 11:43 PM
3

This. You need to be prepared for a baby. Babies need the following: Somewhere to sleep A tit to suck on Climate-appropriate clothing/swaddles Everything else comes later and can be bought as the need is identified. Edit: You also need something to put it in when you're not carrying it.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/02/17 11:22 PM
1

I lost my father in-law this week. It was incredibly sudden and a real blow to the family. He was probably the most naturally alpha man I know and in many ways was a father figure within my life. The elevated emotional state following the shock has opened my eyes to some deficits within myself. My wife has travelled to be with her mother, siblings and their families and I’m holding fort at home with the children. I think I’ve been exemplary in my handling of the situation. While I’d have it hand…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/02/17 10:53 PM
3

Do I stop saying I love you etc completely? Do you love your wife? Do you ever feel like telling her? Do that. Don't do it 'cause you're expected to but in the grand scheme of things, saying "love you" at the end of a phone call ain't that hard. If you don't want to say it at the end of every phone call pull back slooooooowly. If she picks it up, tease her about it. Make her laugh. I've stopped responding to most of the stuff I feel she's saying just to get a reaction . Keep doing this. If she a…
/r/askMRP07/02/17 11:33 AM
3

In time, the fact that she threw your coat downstairs will not be insulting to you. It'll be so hilarious that you won't stop laughing. You'll be amused that she plays out the same old script. Her same manipulation tactic. And it will have zero effect over you. Here's the answer you need, OP.
/r/askMRP07/02/17 12:46 AM
1

The somewhat good news is that I am coming back every weekend to see them, so I am not totally abandoning them. I don't profess to know your situation but I'd just say watch yourself on this point here. This is your perspective. Not your wife's, not your in-laws'. You alone are the final judge of your actions so you'd better be sure your perspective on what is best for your family is rock solid.
/r/askMRP05/02/17 11:01 PM
7

Let me tell you a story. I lost a job a few years ago, had to return to my home country, SAHW and two kids in tow. After several weeks of couch surfing at a mate's bachelor pad, my wife decided she'd move in with her folks (several hundred miles away) while I remained in our home city looking for work. Six months passes, she's still there and I'm 100 interviews down without a single job offer. My wife was understandably shitty by this point. She had worn out her welcome at her folks’ place. She …
/r/askMRP03/02/17 07:04 AM
1

But stepping up and being the leader is empowering either way, is it not?
/r/MarriedRedPill01/02/17 05:38 AM
1

With nothing better to do, I say something all the lines "wanna suck it", and place my hand on her neck, quite gently. This is where the situation escalates to 11 in a second. Yet: I put soap on my hands and start massaging her bobs, she's protesting that she has no time blah blah blah... I start playing with her pussy, she goes again "do you think this makes me wet". Just putting this out there, but are you escalating to 11 in a second, too? I'm in the midst of /u/BluepillProfessor 's book at t…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/01/17 05:39 AM
2

This. Counting calories changed my relationship with alcohol. Having a goal to get and stay lean conflicts with the goal to get drunk right now. YMMV but when I think about it in those terms, it's becomes much easier to say no to the third bottle of beer.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/01/17 06:38 AM
2

Your bro ain't a bro, hence the useless "just divorce" advice.
/r/askMRP20/01/17 09:59 AM
6

Man, you just got some tough love. Kill your ego and take it on board. We've all had to do it. (Some of us with mixed success. Boy do I still let my ego fuck things up, regularly.) Anytime you start a sentence with "but for some reason", that some reason is that you're a faggot. The point you're missing is that your problems are your fault. 100%. Your wife's self esteem is not your problem.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/01/17 11:08 PM
15

If you are looking for more than sex or abundance, then you are a needy guy looking for validation, and, you will probably implode your marriage. As someone who thinks about wandering somewhat regularly, this is a solid perspective.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/01/17 04:20 AM
1

You're probably right. I probably am fucking around, but would appreciate your thoughts on where I might be letting myself down: I've followed SL 5x5 consistently, lifting 3x per week since mid Feb. I've had two fortnight-long stretches where I've missed workouts; the first due to moving house (i.e. more important shit to do) and the second was due to injury. I've deliberately been adding weight more slowly than called for, knowing that I'm very inexperienced and that I've fucked up and hurt mys…
/r/askMRP29/11/16 11:57 PM
1

So anyway, following your 'shoulders back' advice helped. Not quite in the way you described but it forced me to press the bar up 'through' my head a little more. (Head back for a moment to get it out of the way, of course.) Scapula felt like it was on the verge of catching but it didn't, and I managed to fly through all 5x5 reps. Put a little bit more pressure on my lower back, though, which I guess is something I'll have to take care with.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/11/16 11:20 PM
1

Yeah, maybe when I actually sort out my own absence issues.
/r/askMRP29/11/16 11:11 PM
4

This topic is something close to my heart because my own issues with absence - specifically, not enough of it - are a glaring hole in my MAP. While I recognise the demonstrations of high value in the list above, I'd like to put forward that this is beta-provider-esque Generally Owning Shit; it isn't true absence. Generally Owning Shit is a beta DHV and I'm really fucking good at it. True absence is an alpha DHV and it's something I'm working on. The key elements to true absence are physical dist…
/r/askMRP29/11/16 02:55 AM
2

Win for bro science! Workout B scheduled for tonight so will see how your suggestion goes and report back.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/11/16 01:26 AM
2

Thanks for this post. I've read it a few times now and will do so a few more before responding.
/r/askMRP28/11/16 09:54 PM
0

You should have gained more strength after lifting for ten months. Are you getting enough protein? Try drinking a glass of whole milk right before, and a second one right after, lifting. I've been running a calorie deficit and keeping my protein up has been a real effort. Before I started, I was eating WAY less protein than optimal. Not for any reason other than I just didn't know. I've just moved to a neutral/minor surplus position. Finding it easier to get all that protein in and the results a…
/r/askMRP28/11/16 09:53 PM
1

So how does that work with the shrug at the top?
/r/MarriedRedPill28/11/16 09:51 PM
2

Thank you for your concern.
/r/askMRP28/11/16 09:28 AM
1

"supple leopard" Thanks for the tip. Looks interesting.
/r/askMRP28/11/16 09:07 AM
0

Squat high bar.... Haven't managed to get the hang of low bar. Feels like the bar will slip off my back. Is your arse shooting up first, followed by shoulders with a sort of double-pivot twerk? See this is interesting. I can't visualise a 'double-pivot twerk' but since I've "corrected" my form, ass up first is closer to what I was doing. I was watching a Rippetoe video where he was saying to concentrate on your hips moving up. That's kind of working for me. I started videoing my form when my kne…
/r/askMRP28/11/16 09:07 AM
1

I've hurt myself on every major lift now. It's a lesson learned the hard way but luckily they've been minor enough to not hold me back for more than a couple of days. Current bugbear is one scapula catching at the top on OHP. No matter which way I stretch I just can't seem to stop it happening...
/r/askMRP28/11/16 06:49 AM
1

This is a shit test, and your failing it by taking it seriously. Next time you walk by the couch when she's on it, ask where the extra pillows are since you need something to feel up as you try to sleep. You're right, I'm taking her far too seriously. I think you are asking for this fight It's not that I'm eager for it. I want to ensure that I'm prepared for it. I did think there could be a strategic advantage to bringing it to a head at a time of my choosing but, as clearly articulated by /u/Fi…
/r/askMRP28/11/16 06:00 AM
0

6 ft flat, 155 lbs. Had never lifted before 2016. Bench I'm currently working at 110 (5x5). Stalled for a while so I started eating more. Seems to be helping. Squat today, 100. Haha, not cool. A year ago I couldn't squat at all. Practiced through toddler squats, goblet squats, then to the bar. Got up to 120 and then my knee started giving way, painfully, for a day or two after lifting. Videoing myself I think I was getting too much depth so I started again at the bar and have been slowly slowly …
/r/askMRP28/11/16 05:38 AM
1

Yeah, the school crowd is my bread and butter in applying what I'm learning about game. I'm definitely one of the more visible and popular dads so it comes pretty easy.
/r/askMRP28/11/16 05:29 AM
1

My strategy around this is around striking up conversations with anyone and everyone. I'm certainly noticing results but have no idea whether my wife has. Weird thing I've noticed is people touching me. If I wear something a bit tighter people tend to touch me when they talk to me. Women touch the arm, men touch around the ab region. So it's something I'm working on but not working through.
/r/askMRP28/11/16 03:31 AM
3

This post comes like daggers straight to the heart of the issue. Pick the scenario that you want and stick with it. Honestly, your odds of keeping her around are higher if you tell her to fuck off and do your own thing instead of some shitty "scenarios" where you ask her to be nice to you or some shit. Sack up and have the balls the follow through with what you want instead of throwing it back on her. No wonder she doesn't respect you. Point taken.
/r/askMRP28/11/16 03:24 AM
1

are you FUN to be around? This has weighed on me. The short answer is 'not lately'. I certainly have fun around the house and socially when we're out. But my tingle-creation ability with her is close to zero. As I improve I've been noticing some IOIs from other women but nothing overt. I recognise this could be confirmation bias, or simply me waking up to something that was always there. I'm 17%bf but skinnyfat. My bench is getting there slowly but my squat is shocking. Still working towards 1xB…
/r/askMRP28/11/16 03:14 AM
1

Sounds like you think you're at Dread Levels 9-10. Are you actually there in real life? Absolutely not. More like 7-8. Since she is on the couch, you're gonna be the one who will initiate this talk? I wouldn't do that. Just continue being awesome and don't let her drag you into this emotional bullshit. Point taken here. As I said, I've been unsure on whether to lead in this situation or wait for her to come to me. I think this point helps clarify. Either way, I believe a talk of some sort is com…
/r/askMRP28/11/16 03:06 AM
1

This comment was like a shot in the arm today. Had a tough gym session yesterday where my scapula kept catching on some other bone during OHP. Was expecting to pull off 5x5 and didn't come close. Was pumped for some PBs this week, which are now looking shaky but a PB without being happy with my form is just vanity. Feeling less demoralised. Thanks!
/r/MarriedRedPill25/11/16 03:02 AM
5

Based on my experience it is likely to shake things up. My birthday is coming up and I made plans for myself (i.e. without her) for that evening. Told the wife about plans last night and she exploded. Seems to have brought everything to a head and now she's decided that's the end of our relationship. The attempt at manipulation is so clear - she's expecting me to roll over and apologise and beg her to take me back. Because when something like this happened a couple of years ago that's just what …
/r/MarriedRedPill24/11/16 10:40 PM
3

My life is a constant stream of shit tests this week and it's rattling me. I'm about three or four weeks into a monk mode of sorts. I've reached a point where I'm sick of "trying" in my marriage so I've just stopped bothering. I'm not really angry but I'm not IDGAF either. I guess it's just sad. Ugh - my feelz are sad. Part of monk mode is that I've just stopped initiating, kinoing or gaming my wife. I'm friendly and civil but haven't shown any affection at all. She's clearly rattled by this cha…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/11/16 12:34 AM
2

I'm also at serious risk here. 12 months of improvement on my part and nothing but DGAF from my wife. The number of times I've had to bite my tongue and just STFU. Knowing you have more work to do is one thing but it's easy to forget that when you're dealing with indifference towards you physically and mild contempt for your leadership. I have two problems here: I still give a fuck. Giving a fuck means I can get butthurt. By STFU I might be successfully fake OI 75% of the time but the other 25% …
/r/MarriedRedPill15/11/16 01:01 AM
0

This is an awesome response. Thank you. your value isn't just money, it's your whole ability to make her life happen (Positive frame, social status, tingles, food and shelter, protection from harm, boredom, and choices. Seeing it all laid out like that shows me where I'm falling down, too.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/11/16 12:28 AM
1

Tim, I too was diagnosed with ADHD later in life, and in starting my MRP journey I'm interested in your thoughts on how these intersect. I'm self-diagnosed thus far, so I could be wrong. Did you find a proper diagnosis improved your life in any way, shape or form? What do you do differently now? ADHD...procrastination...avoidance...bluepill faggotry. Another one of those "yep, that's me" moments. I think you're right with your point about "negative energy", too. I still have a sense that I'm fak…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/11/16 10:49 PM
0

You have to be mentally capable of leaving and standing alone for her to believe it. I think this hits the nail on the head. And I think my career issues are ultimately the problem because I'd be stuffed if I had to stand on my own feet financially. You've just reiterated to me that this is the area I need to focus on in order to build my independence. One of the most consistent AWALT is that a woman cannot be attracted to man she does not respect and consider to be higher in SMV than herself. H…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/11/16 10:44 PM
0

I'd been an AFC sliding into betadom long before then. If anything was the catalyst to a dead bedroom it was my wife's stint as a stay-at-home mum and my attempts to "work through" her problems (and my DB problem) through compromise and negotiation. The career problems and her return to work eroded away what little respect was left to the point where, had I not found TRP and MRP she probably would have left me by now. (With me begging and pleading behind her.)
/r/MarriedRedPill09/11/16 09:35 AM
0

I’ve hit a year of RP awareness so I though this would be a good moment to take stock and look at where I am. And the truth be told I’m not really satisfied with how far I’ve come. Thinking through my journey, I’ve implemented haphazardly and the result has been the same frustrations that always plagued my life – essentially revolving around me not having my needs and wants met. Funny thing is, even though RP awareness has opened my eyes to the fact that no one else gives a fuck about meeting my…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/16 11:59 PM
2

A few extra pounds and a couple of stretch marks is a reasonable trade-off for children if you want them. I guarantee your libido won't be affected. You might lust after something else but if you're a normal man you'll do that anyway. Your choices on what to do about that don't change. I was in bluepill blindness through both my wife's pregnancies and I still managed to be the oak. THIS is the time you step up and be the captain. It sounds like you're worried about developing oneitis. Build a st…
/r/askMRP04/09/16 11:54 PM
1

That all makes a lot of sense to me. Mirror test seems to be to be more interesting than scales test. Though what's the benefit of narrowing the window in leangains?
/r/MarriedRedPill01/09/16 04:02 AM
1

See this is interesting. Bulk or cut, bulk or cut? I'm 6', 158 lbs, 17% BF (navy calc). Have been eating a small calorie deficit to get BF% down to below 15. Mirror test says physique is improving and weight has dropped but the BF I was hoping to reduce is unmoved (thirtysomething paunch, saddle-bags). Would a lean bulk be a better strategy for aesthetics? The idea I guess would be to offset the paunch with a bigger upper body. Currently following SL5x5 FWIW.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/09/16 03:22 AM
1

If had a body like this, I would go for a high weight hypertrophy program to get lean and show that you are cut. Any suggestions for a beginner program that would fit the bill here?
/r/MarriedRedPill01/09/16 03:17 AM
2

You know what, before finding the red pill, I used to be a lot like that. Happy wife, happy life attitude all the way. Totally comes down to Blue Pill conditioning. The funniest thing is that women are totally disgusted by that attitude. "Happy wife, happy life" makes wives anything but happy. I shudder when I think about all the times I checked in to make sure my wife was happy with my decisions. By doing that, I put her in a position that caused friction in our relationship. She didn't want to…
/r/askMRP26/08/16 06:34 AM
3

She doesn't deserve a nice dinner from me. You do these things for you, not for her.
/r/askMRP26/08/16 01:38 AM
1

When was the last time you made an effort to make her look good to her family? This is a point I've been mulling over for a little while. From a hypergamy perspective it seems making a woman look good to her family is a really important part of attraction. I also know this is something I need to work on. My wife's family all live in different cities so we only see them a few times a year, but when we do it's usually for stretches of several days. My wife always raises her bitch-level by a couple…
/r/askMRP25/08/16 12:18 AM
1

If simply telling her where you went turns into some little mind game thing you may as well just end it Good idea. I'll make a final judgement on my entire marriage based on one short conversation exchange. In my experience, all women are adept at turning the most trivial things into mind games. It wouldn't be fair of me to single my wife out for that.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/16 01:50 AM
1

I'd like that to be the case, so I hope you're right. Timing wise, she was probably ovulating when the kid cock-blocked so she might be pissed at me for missing that boat.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/16 01:37 AM
1

Yeah, I'm pretty confident I'm not building up a big CC over her diet. I invited her to join me, tried to make it a bit of fun. She agreed and then it got too hard and I've pretty much left it at that. Not going to push the issue. Her problems are hers. Actually getting her involved was a win in terms of me successfully setting an agenda and having her go "yeah, that sounds like a good idea, I'm in", which is exactly the sort of thing I've been trying to do.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/16 01:35 AM
1

May I suggest the following. you ain't shit. your game is bad your frame is a sulking compulsive liar who is taking his ball and going home. Consider a healthier one. Fuck, man. If I thought I was at the top of my game I wouldn't have wasted my time (or anyone else's here) by posting on the internet about it. I'm here to learn, not here to humblebrag. Either way, I'll take the frame of a sulking compulsive liar over the "frame", or lack thereof, I had a year ago. I get it, I created a big covert…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/16 01:19 AM
1

But why have a plan if you DGAF about the outcome? Might be a moot point since this thread makes abundantly clear I still have covert contract issues to work through, but the way I've been viewing it, you work on what you can control and you own the outcome. The way I see it, I can still want my wife to have sex with me/to be attractive/. I can still do things to try to effect that outcome. But if the cards don't fall the way I want them to, I can only be shitty with myself.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/16 12:21 AM
2

...AT THAT EXACT MINUTE... ...the point of TRP is to not play the games females play, you instead chose to play with them This is probably the most eye-opening comment in this thread. Thanks. Eye-opening because this is exactly the sort of shit my wife would pull if the situation was reversed. Playing her game = in her frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/16 12:13 AM
1

No, I wasn't moping. It wasn't a bad evening at all.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/16 12:11 AM
2

Haha I'm picturing weakandsensitive lubing up a square peg and trying every which way to jam it into a round hole, wondering why it just isn't fitting... In all seriousness I've been thinking about this - why is it that I'm being hammered hard on a "lie" when it never even occurred to me that it was such. Without any real thought to what I was saying, I said I went walking because that was what I had been doing at that exact minute. But why did I say that? I wasn't ashamed of where I'd been. I h…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/08/16 06:35 AM
1

shoulda told the truth about where you went and owned it. What's the worst she will do, get mad? The logic was less about hiding what I was doing and more about not wanting to share every last detail about where I was and what I was doing. I get the point though. I may as well have walked in and "ner ner, you don't own me!" because that's how it could have come across. Just ride out the silent treatment and go about living your awesome life. Enjoy the quiet. Agreed.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/08/16 04:35 AM
1

my gigantic covert contract Haha. I'll pay that. It has occurred to me before that all this self improvement stuff is just a big covert contract. But at what point isn't it? If I do X because I want Y and get shitty about it, it's a covert contract. If I do X because I want X and I get Y as a bonus, then it's not a covert contract. But if I want Y and doing X is the optimum path towards getting Y, doesn't covert contract essentially boil down to whether or not I'm operating within my sphere of i…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/08/16 04:25 AM
1

The bad side is that I started to very easily push past other people's boundaries (where previously I would restrain myself / get caught up with my own issues way earlier) and I caused others harm. I appreciate you may not want to share specifics but I'm really interested in this point. How has applying WISNIFG caused you to cause others harm? The book has been purely beneficial to me, but I'm wondering if there's an aspect of application that I'm missing. Not that I'm trying to go dark triad or…
/r/askMRP12/08/16 01:48 AM
1

Could go with "you are the only one around here"; and then leave... Fuck. Fog, A&A and AM all rolled into one. Next level.
/r/askMRP07/08/16 11:38 PM
3

Got a big title promotion today. No raise but the title just makes my fricking day. It never ceases to amaze me how companies seem to have successfully divorced responsibility/seniority from remuneration.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/16 02:36 AM
1

Sounds like you've answered your own question.
/r/askMRP30/07/16 04:23 AM
1

Most certainly. As mentioned above I think the issue is credibility. Blue pill me effectively surrendered all control over our sex life and climbing back to a position of power and dominance is a long, slow process. In 9 months I've made notable gains in family leadership, particularly I no longer play the games that used to lead to terrible arguments. I'm not completely there yet but I'm close to the point of cementing myself as the final arbiter of family affairs. But apart from the eliminatio…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/07/16 04:22 AM
1

What's your mission in life and how does supporting a wife and 5 kids fit in with that picture?
/r/askMRP29/07/16 10:49 PM
1

I think this is true. My wife was always fairly suppressed sexually (like you, I wonder what the root of it is) but I can see now how it's my actions that have led her further down the path of suppression. While I can see how if I led her there I can lead her back, what I struggle with is the long path back when cutting and running seems like an easier option. Baby steps.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/07/16 01:55 AM
1

It's obvious I need to increase attraction and DEVI elements. Which is basically just MRP 101. I don't really understand the whole suppression of sexuality thing either - but I know that my bluepill actions have made the situation worse. Rather than encouraging her to open up through leadership and dominance, I "encouraged" it through being sensitive and gentle and expressing my undying love. Now, the struggle is building the credibility (in her eyes) to lead after being so passive (and covert-c…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/07/16 01:50 AM
1

This is a really interesting comment and it's been in the back of my mind all day, as I try to work out where my wife sits on the spectrum. Like /u/JDRoedell I think she displays a mix of the second and third types (natural-dominant-submissive), which on the surface doesn't make sense. She has a tonne of self-confidence issues, which causes her to avoid expressing desire. She's not naturally dominant, but uses dominance tactics as that allow her to control the situation. (Hides self, changes pos…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/07/16 04:32 AM
7

To mediocrity and beyond!
/r/askMRP20/07/16 01:15 PM
2

Pain killers were helping and the injury seems to have subsided to the point where it's nearly healed. Lower weight and an extra rest day until I can't feel any trace of the injury, then slowly working my way back up is the plan. Happily, I can say I'm nearly feeling healthy enough to drop the extra rest day. Protein definitely isn't an issue for me as it's something I've been working on. I'm pretty sure injury was due to lack of experience. (Pushing self too hard with poor form etc.)
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/16 11:15 PM
1

I would put the odds of a woman being embarrassed in this situation and determining it was her fault at you winning the Lottery But...but...my special snowflake is different. Haha. IMO, nukes should never be used in public....much better for AM or A&A. Fair point. My nuke wasn't really a full-on nuclear but an A&A would have been infinitely better.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/16 11:11 PM
1

I have injured myself lifting. And there’s a big lesson here. I got impatient. I ramped up weight faster than my inexperienced body could handle. Then I rushed a workout and - boom - wake up the next day with a cricked neck/shoulder. 6 days later I can probably get by without painkillers. Planning to give myself a few more days off lifting then deload by 10% and renew focus on form...and patience. Some nice little wins on the marriage side. I nuked a few compliance-orders directed at me during a…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/07/16 04:14 AM
2

How long you have implemented red pill into your marriage? Found TRP and MRP around Sep/Oct 2015 and have been slowly implementing ever since. Where are you at on the 12 Levels of Dread? Implementing levels 3, 4 and 5 haphazardly. Key issue is that I know I'm still too present in my wife's life. I'm getting out more than I was but not as much as I need to be. How long have you been married, and how is it going? Been with wife over 15 years. Marriage happened at some random point along that timel…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/06/16 12:06 AM
1

Some really interesting points here, thanks. this is the ultimate soft ball lobbed up into the air for you to smash Yup. I know I should be spotting these from miles off but as I said, she's sneaky. Regardless - your not having any fun with shit testing at all and that is a problem You're right, I'm not. I've always known I need to be out of the house more but it's really becoming clear that this is my central point of failure. My life makes it harder to get out but not impossible at all. One qu…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/16 06:45 AM
3

All they need is some puffy red pom pons and quilted red Rs on their sweaters Quilted 'A's, actually. https://teespring.com/gloalphashirt
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/16 03:13 AM
3

Lol @ that "Borders" thread: Other subs worthy of mention unfortunately include the Married Red Pill sub, which...has devolved into an exercise in rationalizing why it was a good idea to begin with. Apart from that one comment from TFA, I can't think of the last time I read a comment advocating getting married on MRP. Also the whole "don't marry because divorcerape" fear is a pretty US-centric view of the world. I'm not technically married though in my country I enjoy the exact same benefits and…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/16 02:14 AM
1

First off, this is a low quality post given the question. Lest I be accused of the MRP crime-worse-than-victim-puke, I'll go through my specific actions in line with the 12 stages. Though I think my question has been comprehensively answered, I'm sure it will be cathartic for me to lay my efforts bare. I guess this is a misdirected OYS post... Caveat: Haven't read the Prof's book yet...though I'm up to date with most of the sidebar materials and several other resources. My "12 levels" knowledge …
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/16 01:42 AM
1

You're at that weird stage where you're finally feeling like you could be good on your own but she hasn't quite bought the act yet. It helps to think of this like a 'stage'. I guess it's post-anger but with residual bitterness.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/16 12:01 AM
2

This is only something I've recently begun to notice myself. Wouldn't go so far to call it pre-selection, but I've noticed a lot of the school mums and soccer mums making more effort to talk to me. (Got randomly told I "obviously work out". Nice bit of validation there. Heh.) I guess if that interest I'm receiving is a trajectory and not just my own confirmation bias it would be only a matter of time before my wife notices.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/16 11:59 PM
2

I agree wholeheartedly and know I need to be out of the house more. I work from home, too, so there's no hamstering about what happens at the office, post-work drinks with colleagues etc. Unfortunately, a gym membership just isn't on the cards for me financially, so I have to make do with the home setup. (The Y is the most expensive gym in my area - though I'm not in the Nth America so the way the Y works is probably different here.) This doesn't mean I can't get out more, though. Because I work…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/16 11:51 PM
1

Yeah, this is pretty similar to what I do. Don't feel like you have to get home when you are done. Get home when you want to. And this has been pretty much one of my core changes in the last half year. Doing what I want to do, not what someone else wants me to do.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/16 11:39 PM
1

Cheating is highly unlikely. Interestingly, she's not fully checked out. I do receive an endless stream-of-consciousness via text message over the course of the day. (Interestingly, I stopped responding shortly after discovering MRP and the volume of useless texts hasn't decreased.) I think she's checked out of the physical side because she's secure enough to think I won't leave her. She's certainly comfortable enough that her hamster is too busy concerning itself with I-need-to-buy-this and the…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/16 10:15 PM
1

This is not always the case with "attraction." It is a switch that turns on in their monkey brains, not a dial. It is either "on" or "off." You are just now beginning to flip that switch so forward march. This switch idea is interesting and would neatly explain my internal dissonance. Sidenote, Prof - is your book available anywhere other than Amazon?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/16 01:28 AM
1

Boom. There it is.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/16 12:21 AM
1

This disgusting paradox that effects so many of us that cannot get off of this vasilation of FMorFY, because in reality, you are then doing this work to get to a point to yell this statement and it is anger that is controlling you and not your Frame. This is solid. Increasing outcome independence is not the same as total outcome independence. I'd be lying if I said there wasn't at least some bitter urge inside me to enjoy the satisfaction of the "fuck you" part.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/16 12:20 AM
3

Yeah, I appreciate that. My post wasn't intended as an "I'm shit hot now so it's time to go nuclear" diatribe. More like "my life is improving in all kinds of ways, yet there's one area where I've effectively made zero progress". Yes, I understand the one-month-per-year-of-fuckup rule but when there are noticeable improvements elsewhere it does lead one to question whether: a) I'm doing it wrong b) I'm wasting my time I definitely feel a growing sense that I'd be better off if I wasn't married. …
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/16 12:15 AM
2

Six moths of MRP implementation, three months of lifting. Though you might argue anything before that started doesn't count. In solid newb gains territory physically. I'm probably under 20% body fat (self evaluated), the lifting so far has really just tightened things up a bit.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/05/16 07:29 AM
5

I like the sentiment. Though I mow the lawn because enjoy the act of mowing. There's something about pushing a little, wheeled chamber of exploding petrol around while blades spin dangerously at my foot level. It also breaks all the time and it's the one mechanical tool I'm happy enough to have a go at fixing.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/05/16 10:18 PM
1

Enervating vs. Energizing: This is based on an askmrp comment by J10. And what a comment. I've had this concept at the top of my mind all week.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/16 09:41 AM
1

Protein intake is my bugbear too. Switched up my proteinless toast breakfast for oatmeal with dates, cinnamon and unflavoured whey powder. Same calories, 35g of protein. For snacks, I'm currently working out a homemade protein bar recipe, targeting 20g protein for an 800kj serve. It's shaping up as some kind of nut-honey-whey powder monstrosity but should be good if I can work out how to sweeten without upping calories too much.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/16 07:14 AM
1

Yeah, my wife is a master of frame too, but if I want to see the purity of an absolute unbendable, unbreakable frame I look no further than my 3 year old daughter. If she were a man she'd be alpha as fuck. It really shows how we're all born with a solid frame - some moreso than others - and how society beats it out of us insofar as we let it.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/16 04:16 AM
2

eventually a realization that it's not her, it's the reflection of your past failures that make you resent her Boom. Grasping this is my biggest problem at the moment.
/r/askMRP19/04/16 12:14 PM
1

Well this puts the rest of our petty musings to shame.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/04/16 01:32 PM
4

Yeah, I think this is standard behaviour. I've got my diet locked down so for me it's a little prompt to "just give yourself a rest today" and what I'd call active disinterest in my progress. I'd say it's a combination of guilt over her own habits and a protection method against the possibility of dread.
/r/askMRP15/04/16 11:09 PM
4

Your salary doesn't mean shit. Read the sidebar. Here's a quote from the very first article to your right: You need to seriously look at your relationship and decide whether or not you are an "equal partner" in all things, or if you are the Man who takes charge, gets things done, and appeals to his woman on the basis of his masculinity, not his income potential.
/r/askMRP15/04/16 04:03 AM
2

I'm 40 in two years and yes, I have a specific goal in place for then with respect to being a fit, toned, good-looking motherfucker. But if that's the extent of my vision I'd very likely wake up a good-looking 40 year old with a subpar marriage, subpar job and subpar financial agency.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/04/16 02:50 AM
1

What it totally sounds like you need to do is get your head out of your ass. Yep. Easier said than done, but this is my post in a nutshell. Tendency to overthink everything. Vision is pretty damn simple. Acknowledging this comment too. I can hamster my way out of anything.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/04/16 02:22 AM
4

It's interesting how MRP posts often follow themes from week to week and I've noticed lately a lot of talk about 'vision'. This is a weak point for me and something I'm honestly struggling with. My unplugging journey thus far has been very tactical in nature. Get fit. Change my attitude. Don't take shit. Small changes, small wins. I've always approached life in a pretty beta sort of way, and in particular I note one motherfucking huge covert contract with the world that if I just kind of did the…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/16 10:49 AM
1

If you don't want to pay for the bottle service, surely you can find a better priced alternative that still tickles your wife's "conspicuous consumption" impulses? From what little I understand about bottle service at a club, your wife wants to pay too much for drinks while sitting at an exclusive table and shouting "huh, can you say that again?" to her friends. By my reasoning you're coming off a low base and can do better. Select a few cheaper places and cram all your friends into a stretch, w…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/04/16 12:26 AM
1

Similar story to me. I never posted but read DB a couple of times when I was feeling despair over my DB. The sidebar note saying talk of redpill would get you banned piqued my curiosity and this whole world opened up in front of me.
/r/askMRP07/04/16 12:41 AM
1

I think "more sex" is the initial goal that gets a lot of us in here. Then that changes for some to getting better quality sex and treatment. Eventually it sinks in that this is about being a better man - and how to be a leader for your family. This is exactly where I'm up to. ..and get sex. Except for this bit. But now I know it's my own fault.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/16 11:49 PM
5

This is leading to a premature expectation of the benefits that are afforded to the Alpha male or more accurately, the masculine man who is owning his shit. These premature man-children begin to feel as though the world owes them something - some respect or appreciation to make up for that lost period of time where they decided to take their foot off the gas and become weaksauce fucks. I must admit to battling with these expectations myself. I think this mindset comes from not fully internalisin…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/16 03:46 AM
1

RPW & RPS Red Pill Women and ???
/r/MarriedRedPill04/04/16 11:42 PM
3

she was saying take me- and get us a baby sitter. Conditions should not exist with your SO. You are a fucking child. Can you elaborate on your thinking here? The problem with what he did isn't jumping out at me. Seems like he delegated a responsibility; she didn't follow through. My thinking is that her lack of effort was a shit test, particularly as it seems to have been a catalyst to bring on something bigger.
/r/askMRP04/04/16 10:29 PM
1

The first step is admitting you have a problem. If there was one thing that kicked me into gear to DO something about it, it was this article. Followed by sidebar, lift.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/04/16 10:05 PM
1

ps. Glad you started lifting bro! It's actually fun. Why didn't I start this 20 years ago?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/04/16 06:48 AM
5

Response is easy: "I miss your tits. Send a photo."
/r/askMRP01/04/16 12:36 AM
1

My kids are 3 and 6, don’t play the age card. There is no age card. You want to give your kids a head start, you start reading from day ONE. I read something once that suggested you should read 1,000 books to your child before they turn 5. It doesn't matter whether it's 1,000 different books or the same book 1,000 times. And if you think about it, that's barely one book every two days. Every parent should be able to pull that off. In the beginning, it's less about content and more about engaging…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/03/16 03:54 AM
1

Hope this helps your view. Indeed it does. Kids CAN be happy playing with a cardboard box that the toys came in.. :} I couldn't agree more here. Especially with toys. We tend to buy used toys from charity shops, then donate them back when the kids tire of them. It's a win-win-win because it's dirt cheap, the kids get tonnes of stimulation, and the money we do spend goes to a good cause.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/03/16 01:30 AM
1

Kind of a built in mental poverty narrative. This is really interesting and there's probably a lot of truth to it. In the last two years I lost a good expat job, moved back to my home country, spent more than a year unemployed before successfully getting something paying a third of my previous income. I guess the "poverty narrative" exists through looking backwards, coupled with the strong desire for me to return to the trajectory I thought I was on. But none of that is useful to my situation ri…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/03/16 12:35 AM
1

Go for it.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/03/16 08:45 PM
1

Until there is a shift in support of the female imperative, this is our reality and you must not balk but rather find a way to make this knowledge work to your advantage. Appreciate the gift provided by The Manosphere – The gift of knowledge and awareness. You are armed with the understanding of how and why things are operating in the manner they do – exploit that. Why not stop there? Why disrupt the class? I'm pretty happy with having my eyes opened to a set of tools that allows me to navigate …
/r/MarriedRedPill30/03/16 10:18 AM
2

A family trip away over Easter provided an interesting opportunity to take stock of how far I've come and how far I still have to go. Physical development: Started lifting six weeks ago, have maintained the discipline to do so every second day. Have been in a lot of DOMS-type pain so was looking forward to a few days recovery. Interesting points to note - four days off and, once the DOMS subsided, my body stiffened up. It seems I have two options now - DOMS pain or lazy stiffness. I know which o…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/03/16 12:50 AM
1

I'm of the opinion reading to your kids is the single best thing you can do for them. Books are the one thing we have no qualms purchasing in our household and we have hundreds. It's just insane how beneficial it is: Adds something fun to the daily routine Creates together time with very little effort. But cosy, special one-to-one (or one-to-two in my case) time Sows the seeds of later literacy. Not just reading but things like vocal inflection and character/plot development. Start early enough …
/r/MarriedRedPill29/03/16 11:15 PM
1

I like the part where OP nulls and voids his own covert contract. Because you can do things expecting an outcome. But you can't get pissy if they don't go your way. Leadership trumps any single outcome. Bravo.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/03/16 12:05 AM
1

My wife has taken a larger interest in her fitness since I've taken a larger interest in mine. She might be trying to compete. Or trying to keep up. Either way, this is a good thing. You're leading. She's following. I can't see any way it could end badly. Assuming you maintain your efforts, best case is you end up with a hotter, more motivated wife. Worst case, your wife loses the motivation, which earns you respect for your ongoing discipline.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/03/16 11:48 PM
1

I agree with this, but hope OP took pause to consider my points regardless. Holding a weak frame is good. Building a strong one is better.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/03/16 02:34 AM
1

On vaxxing: Don't fight your wife with logic. Fight her feelz. Less studies, more stories of parents who have lost kids to preventable disease etc. You're scared your child will pass something on to someone else and they'll die etc. She's not rational so don't try to fight her with a rational response. Failing that, do what you have to do and own the consequences.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/03/16 09:46 AM
1

Thanks for that. Sounds like my strategy is on the right track.
/r/askMRP21/03/16 03:01 AM
1

I don't think anyone on MRP advocates 'bulk and cut.'...A few come in as skinny fat, so lifting will get them some muscle definition and make them stop looking like an emaciated heroin addict with a pot belly. What's the view on bulking from other pot-bellied-heroin-addicts amongst us? The default advice to most questions on /r/fitness seems to be "eat more" but I'm scared of regaining fat that I've successfully lost. I've deliberately started increasing my calorie intake - just a little - prima…
/r/askMRP20/03/16 11:35 PM
2

OP - just search "lifting" on the main sub and you'll find your answer. I discovered the Red Pill about six months ago and spent five of them hamstering away the need to lift. I had recently started running and thought that was doing the job. The gym was expensive. A whole shit-tonne of self-confidence issues around my weak, skinny, inflexilble body. It was, in the end, this post from /u/The_Litz that kicked me into action. But it could have been any number of similar posts that finally got thro…
/r/askMRP20/03/16 11:15 PM
2

Sidenote, and purely out of interest - how do you find the men's group thing. I'm not really interested in anything like that for myself - it sounds a bit like recipe for victimfest. But am interested in how you see that sort of thing from the inside? Is what you do there compatible/incompatible with what you're learning here?
/r/MarriedRedPill18/03/16 06:11 AM
10

To me, it sounds like you carefully planned an interaction that would allow you to test your mettle. I guess all of us who started with a weak frame did this. I sure did, but thankfully I realised early on that it was a bit weak. In short, I think you were being a bit of a dick for the sake of being a bit of a dick. Maybe even showing off a little that there's a new you around these here parts. (Did you want your wife to lean over and start asking about what you're reading?) Sure, you maintained…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/03/16 06:03 AM
2

You either hit a lip melt point or a stiffening. Holy shit, I've never thought about this before. This is actually profound advice.
/r/askMRP17/03/16 12:04 AM
2

That's a great opportunity to practice frame. That's a really good point. Early in my relationship I would often playfully slap my wife's ass. She used to whine about it so beta-bitch-me stopped. After finding MRP I started doing it again. At first it was met with angry resistance, but I pushed through regardless and that has totally subsided now.
/r/askMRP17/03/16 12:02 AM
2

I've seen some gains by being less predictable, but I've been more focused on creating surprising experiences - let's-go-out-right-now sort of stuff. Your point is more about just keeping her on her toes as a kind of default setting. Don't let her think you're boring. What's been the result of your work on this?
/r/askMRP16/03/16 11:58 PM
1

I agree it's critical to have your other manly shit on point. For me, I'm definitely improving on all counts, but am nowhere near "there" yet. I've really backed the hell away from my marriage over the last couple of months. It's been like hitting a big reset button. So now, I'm thinking about the best ways to kind of build that relationship back up again.
/r/askMRP16/03/16 11:51 PM
2

Basically, what needs to change so that normal little boys don't wind up as the twisted, sexually-violent freaks that post here? Interested to hear OP's suggestions on this. Morbidly curious, even.
/r/askMRP14/03/16 08:36 AM
1

Haha excellent.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/03/16 06:16 AM
2

Ha... she's handing you the answer on a platter! Shit test.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/03/16 09:55 PM
1

Yep, you're writhing in pain and still getting shit done yet all she sees is weakness.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/03/16 01:04 AM
1

Yeah, I get that sometimes you just have to shut shit down. The way you did it doesn't sit right with me. "Right now im injured so fuck off JUSTIFY and cut me some slack. ARGUE Its great you haven't noticed the consideration ive given you the last 2 months by changing in the living room. DEFEND I think i might start changing in my bedroom more often." EXPLAIN Either way, it's your life, not mine. But I see some of myself in that and it's behaviour I'm trying to rein in. With my last nuclear opti…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/03/16 11:59 PM
1

I use STFU in arguments and daily life This is the biggest success factor...and often the biggest challenge in a marriage. I know I find it hard. Judging by your post, you do too. I see a lot of talking going on, you'd do well to think about that. Case in point: It was on. My reply "Right now im injured so fuck off and cut me some slack. Its great you haven't noticed the consideration ive given you the last 2 months by changing in the living room. I think i might start changing in my bedroom mor…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/03/16 11:25 PM
2

I was thinking a David Attenborough but crikey, that idea is awesome.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/03/16 09:54 AM
1

This I take it. Cheers! I also take it "friending" someone on Reddit more like following someone on Twitter than "friending" on Facebook?
/r/MarriedRedPill07/03/16 03:14 AM
5

this is a TRP whine My first thought was how OP's post felt out of place on MRP. All that "poor us for being men" bullshit from the main TRP sub is such a pain to wade through to find the actual gold.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/03/16 12:51 AM
1

There's some foresight there on her part: "i know that the beta provider i marry is gonna suck in bed. i'm gonna Chad Thundercock now, while i can."
/r/MarriedRedPill03/03/16 04:01 AM
1

Sir Butthurt, my brain's resident dweeb I know that guy. He's such a douche.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/03/16 12:36 AM
2

With Argentina on the cards you're obviously amenable to the idea of uprooting your life and moving to a foreign country. And living in NZ is a pretty awesome opportunity IMO. (Ski and surf on the same day?) I don't think you're seeing the opportunities here. To be honest, it sounds like you and this lass aren't on the same page, but if you want to explore the relationship further - just do it. But do it for you. For the spirit of adventure. She asked if I’d be interested in moving to New Zealan…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/03/16 10:44 PM
2

Echoing /u/il-est-ressucite I really look forward to your blog posts. It's definitely some of the most solid, accessible content you'll find here. You've probably already considered this but the biggest differences between anonymous guy on internet and master of a men's space are geography and scale. I imagine your posts here touch far more people than a corner of a warehouse somewhere in North America ever will. As such, I hope you continue contributing to this community with what you learn fro…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/03/16 06:44 AM
4

I did a search and couldn't find it but there was a post a few months ago - I think it was from /u/jacktenofhearts (correct me if I'm wrong) - suggesting that the best course of action is to simply stay the course on whatever you were doing before you started improving. No, that doesn't mean keep being a whiny bitch. That means if you initiate three times a week and get shot down three times a week, you keep initiating three times a week and, when you get shot down, you go and do something else.…
/r/askMRP01/03/16 12:00 AM
1

the shots Here's a big part of the problem IMO. As a home brewer I'm sure you can tell the difference between drinking to get drunk and drinking to savour.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/02/16 09:24 PM
2

Newb here. Started SL5x5 about two weeks ago. Learn to do the lifts properly. This makes a tonne of sense to me. I could just tell I was doing everything wrong so dropped back weight to focus on form. Took squats right back to 10kg with just a plate and have been increasing from there. Definitely feels better. You may feel some pain at first. A lot of people think there knee or back pains prevent them from doing these lifts. What they do not realize is that these pains arise from how fucking wea…
/r/TheRedPill25/02/16 08:28 AM
2

It's a marathon, not a sprint. It's a marathon, not a sprint. It's a marathon, not a sprint. Need to remind myself this every day. Lifting: Makes a difference to have finally started this properly. Struggling with the lowest of weights shows me just how weak and inflexible my body is, but also that I must overcome it. I'm slowing things down here. Deloaded to 10kg goblet squats to concentrate on form. Seems to be helping and successfully managed 17.5kg this morning. Which means back to the empty…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/02/16 11:36 PM
4

He said he was envious of my wife and I's relationship. I asked him what he meant. He wanted to know how I got my wife to respect me. I've not mentioned Red Pill, MRP etc to anyone since finding it, and though I'm still fairly early in the game I don't think I'd divulge anything unless specifically asked for help as per above. OP's friend is obviously ready to take on the concepts. Many men aren't.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/16 05:11 AM
7

Ten minutes later she was asking me silly questions like nothing ever happened Thus far the single biggest thing MRP has taught me. Years upon years of futile DEERing and arguing back. How did it not occur to me to just STFU for ten minutes? It felt like sorcery the first few times I tried it.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/16 12:27 AM
5

fake constraint There's an important insight here. The constraint is HERS, not YOURS. You need to make your own constraints, live by them, die by them.
/r/askMRP22/02/16 06:54 AM
1

Do not DEER. Do not JADE Are these basically the same thing?
/r/askMRP22/02/16 06:52 AM
1

"Where is the line between encouraging and forcing?" I think the answer to this is staring you in the face. And that's that there is no line. Like most aspects of parenting, it's a wide, grey band that shifts all the time depending on your parenting goals, your child's interests and common sense. My 6 y/o son loves playing sports but, much like his dad, doesn't display a natural aptitude. He's obsessed with Lego, characters, fantasy and pretending (I'll be Batman, you be a Ninja Turtle), TV/movi…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/02/16 12:11 AM
1

It is what it is. Chances are, she sees you as an acquaintance at best not an object of love or lust. At worst, you're a weaksauce presence in her life that she's keeping around as a convenient co-parent or ATM. The question isn't "is that normal", it's what are you going to do about it? (Hint: sidebar, lift.)
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/16 07:05 AM
2

I live where I do because it's very, very cheap, which means we can live a modest but comfortable lifestyle on our combined income. Considering the lack of money in general, finances are actually pretty on point. Debt-free; just hit six-figures in the savings account. Savings are growing (slowly) but I do need to work on a medium-term investment strategy. When I put it down like that it sounds like I'm dangerously close to having a vision to lay out for my family, but I know my credibility in my…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/02/16 09:14 PM
1

Yep, that's what I want. My goal is to be more assertive, but I don't find myself consciously applying the principles laid out in the book, as compared to say NMMNG, which transformed the way I approached the world. Hopefully a re-read will bring similar results.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/02/16 05:22 AM
1

Working on three key areas at the moment: Lifting, career and marriage. Lifting - If you look at my post history lifting has been a real area of struggle for me, primarily due to self-consciousness at my skinny, inflexible body. Having guys offer tips at the gym, while nice, does nothing for my self-confidence. Bit the bullet this week and got myself some weights to set up a home gym. Just a few days in but damn, lifting is easy when everything is RIGHT THERE. I'm really focusing on getting my f…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/02/16 03:58 AM
1

Good to know. I have been thinking it's about time to hit up WISNIFG for a second read. I find other two prereqs at the top of my mind in many situations but less so with WISNIFG. Which is interesting because it's probably the most important of all three to my situation. It's a fairly dense book so I'm sure there's much to pick up a second time around.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/02/16 03:07 AM
3

Perhaps not surprisingly, /u/jacktenofhearts comments are bang on the money. Bang on. I've invested enough of my life - personally and professionally - in internet communities to know MRP is onto a good thing right now. As Jackten said, this is not a fixed state. Internet communities are fickle and - almost universally - today's thriving meeting places are tomorrow's dull wastelands. There's a fairly uniform culture on MRP as it stands. A bunch of guys comparing notes, seeing results, pondering,…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/02/16 12:10 PM
1

"You do you" is a phrase I found here that I remind myself of regularly. There are a lot of guys here who weren't "alphas" to begin with. Sure, I was moar alpha at point x in the past but ultimately was brought up with a very blue pill mindset. "You do you" is critical for the recovering Nice Guys among us. Don't take shit. Find your purpose. Acta non verba. This is the EXACT OPPOSITE of the version of me that found my way to this sub a few months ago. Guys like us, we KNOW "being yourself" in a…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/02/16 11:48 AM
3

Fuck. This was my journey here exactly.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/02/16 11:01 AM
0

I went through this. Holding frame and continuing to A&A ("you love it deep down") is important but I backed off a bit, more a firm pat than a slap.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/02/16 05:19 AM
4

I am a married man who is now practicing to be single. For me, this just distils the whole point of MRP into a single sentence. Bravo!
/r/MarriedRedPill06/02/16 01:16 AM
1

Wouldn't "File >>> New private tab" provide a good enough result for a fraction of the effort?
/r/MarriedRedPill04/02/16 08:09 AM
2

Yep, am just coming out the other side of flu. Found it funny watching how she doted over the kids (who gave it to me) but ignored my struggle completely. I could hear her hamster, though. Your coughing is annoying and why did you spend an extra 10 minutes in bed this morning you lazy bastard. Meh - AWALT, I guess.
/r/askMRP04/02/16 05:12 AM
2

I can empathise with this. Read the recent post about victim mentality and think about whether it applies to your situation. What I see here is a lack of mission, which is something I struggle with too. Here's what I'm doing. To give you a bit of context, I lost a good job a couple of years ago. Not fired or anything; just one of those things. What followed was 15 heartbreaking months of unemployment. 500 job applications; 80 interviews; zero offers. My wife - kids in tow - moved back to her par…
/r/askMRP04/02/16 02:58 AM
1

A "no apologies" rule was the very first thing I changed about myself after discovering Red Pill. Four months later I'm finally at the point where I don't simply apologise for everything automatically. It was actually nice seeing this post and realise I haven't had to stop myself in a while. A couple of things I noticed. 1. The benefits for me have been wholly internal. I don't have to deal with pregnancy, so my situation is different, but for the most part NO ONE CARES about what I may or may n…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/02/16 05:16 AM
2

Just want to show her basically in writing, DON'T do this. Stop trying to be logical. Read more about DEERing. STFU. just let it go and not ask later in the day? Yes, STFU. Im not trying to change my wife. Yes you are. nothing has changed You haven't changed yourself enough. You want your wife to see you as a High Value Man. Based on your post history, you don't sound like a High Value Man. Read the Sixteen Commandments of Poon right now. Which other sidebar materials have you read?
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 01:01 AM
1

This and validation seeking were my two biggest downfalls. Every time I thought I was owning my shit in the beginning I was really only scratching the surface. It was long hard journey to accept that where I was, where my family was, was 100% my fault. How long was this process for you? This is pretty much me today.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 12:54 AM
10

You sound like you haven't read any of the sidebar materials. This is all MRP101 stuff. she says im nagging Would you fuck a nagging bitch of a husband? i want to bring all this shit up about all the shit she asked me to do, which i did, and sex is the same. No shit. Stop trying to change your wife and work out what you need to change in yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 12:42 AM
1

threatening to taking the kids to a different country is a massive red flag. I think she shouldn't even be joking about that kind of thing. I did the expat thing for a while and this was a standard issue response to everything. I wouldn't read too much into it. An international move from Aus is non-trivial and there's a huge number of steps between "I'm going home" and "I've booked my flights".
/r/askMRP28/01/16 12:07 AM
9

Threw in logic for good measure Has this ever worked for you before? Although I'm always very dedicated to sailing, never missing out a weekend, I agreed for the sake of the extra burden on her it is caring for three young children. ...but then... which I respond "just tell me when you want to have one, and I'll make it happen". Failure of leadership right here. Make a call. A family weekend is either a reasonable request or it isn't. If it isn't, you need to step up and make that clear. If it's…
/r/askMRP27/01/16 06:24 AM
3

The point is to just make sure you look a little better than the next guy, IMHO. The easy way to do it is to make sure your shoes and jacket are a level smarter than average. And probably more collared shirts.
/r/askMRP25/01/16 11:38 PM
3

Don’t be afraid to upset your wife, by playing along and not making waves you are being a sneaky weak bitch. Yeah, I think this is important. I have issues where my wife will ask my opinion, then get upset because she doesn't like the answer. I spent years trying to accommodate or compromise to her viewpoint and I can see now that it's a complete waste of time. She may get shitty but usually acquiesces to my vision. I now realise this is a good result. And you know what? With no further discussi…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/01/16 07:00 AM
1

Hah. Turns out Facebook changed in late 2014 and no longer offers this feature.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/01/16 12:02 AM
3

If you think this is bad, go spend half an hour commenting on Youtube videos.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/01/16 03:42 AM
6

Wow. Anger phase, I guess. And hitting me like a tonne of bricks. First few months since discovering TRP have been all about me. I've made time for me. I no longer try to be 'nice'. I don't take shit from anyone. I've refocused on what I want. I've gotten out of the house and done some cool stuff. I've made some changes to my diet and health and seen some results. I've had a few positive comments about looking well from others and - unexpectedly - I've noticed an increase in respect from other m…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/01/16 06:03 AM
1

Solid post which exceeded expectations. Don't know why, but the title put me off. The point on the click-through about owning your wife's stress hits home here. I've been dealing with a clusterfuck of pre-holiday stress this week and can see now I haven't owned shit. I've been steering clear and maintaining a DGAF attitude to it all but can see how there's room to step up and take control. Thank you.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/12/15 08:59 AM
2

The short answer is OI and DGAF but I haven't quite built a solid enough frame to carry that yet. For me, it's all about eye contact. Let her see you build rapport with women everywhere. Then let her hamster do the rest.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/15 08:42 AM
3

The post is amazing. Seriously good advice in a well told story, but I've never been so glad to not be American. This guy is an Oak with a capital O. Being an Oak but masquerading as a weed is pretty darned clever in his situation, too.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/15 01:13 AM
1

Two things have kept me in control: 1. Forcing myself to exercise the next morning. Knowing this means I adjust the evening's behaviour accordingly. 2. Not drinking at home. A bit of a pattern change but proving very doable so far. Had a big Christmas party Friday night, resulting in first hangover in ages but can forgive that if I keep exercise up and weight down. Interestingly, I'm a kilo or so higher than I should be. (I weigh myself daily so can spot a pattern.) This means I have to watch ev…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/15 12:09 AM
1

After my original cutback I've been sitting on 3-4 days off per week. I'm trying to maintain that. I just have to make an effort to not drink on the nights I'm at home, even if it's Saturday night. Volunteering to be designated driver will help me to drink less on nights out too. It's been really interesting to see how a spike in consumption has directly resulted in a lull in motivation.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/12/15 09:04 AM
2

Alcohol. She's a beast to be tamed. Living in Australia means life is basically one booze-soaked summer party from December to February. Incidental to my RP journey I made the decision early this year to scale back my alcohol consumption. Suddenly party season rolls around and midweek sessions are on the rise. Trouble is, I'm noticing how the increase has zapped my motivation to achieve anything else. Early morning run? Forget it. Empty calories? Well, 'tis the season. I have to knock this shit …
/r/MarriedRedPill01/12/15 11:28 PM
1

You know what, I think you're right. I probably would have missed this if I was in OP's shoes. "You know what I hate? Nazis and tinned tuna."
/r/MarriedRedPill26/11/15 12:32 AM
3

I've just started implementing dread and am beginning to see results, albeit slowly. Two things have been key for me: Inspect the field. I had "checking other girls out" down to a very, very Blue Pill fine art. My first girlfriend gave me all kinds of shit if she "caught" me doing it, so ever since then I've perfected a way to look without it being obvious. Not any more. I turn my head, glance up and down and DGAF if my wife (or the girl I'm checking out, for that matter) notices. Eye contact. I…
/r/askMRP25/11/15 01:34 AM
3

It's not a word I'd usually pull from the vocabulary, unless I was specifically trying to emphasise stupidity or cluelessness. I see my work here is done.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/15 09:33 PM
3

Do you think this works both ways? Context: I make a pretty crappy income and have presumed that focusing on this part of my life will result in improving my SMV. I can clearly see how improving my career WILL improve my condfidence, leadership skills etc, but would you say improving financial position in and of itself is completely incidental to SMV?
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/15 05:37 AM
1

Hmmm... I'm talking about not seeking validation in one point, then complaining that the wife isn't validating my dread tactics in the next. This is interesting.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/11/15 05:14 AM
6

I'm new here and just tried this on my wife. Now she wants to divorce me. I went to the gym once and skimmed the sidebar so I've pretty much totes swallowed the pill. Now what?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/11/15 01:39 AM
1

Having recently followed the required reading schedule, in order, I can absolutely confirm you will get a lot of value out of putting in the (really quite minor) effort. I'm now working through 101 in my own order, based on what I need to work on. But I doubt I'd get nearly as much value out of My reading had I not read NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNIFG first.
/r/askMRP20/11/15 10:07 PM
1

Tough week this week. Must be about three months in now and starting to feel like it's three steps forward, two back. Good: My health is great. Went to the gym for the first time ever a couple of weeks ago and spent a whole week after in a world of pain. Concentrating on a daily body weight fitness regime to get me strong enough to go back without damaging myself. Planning some PT sessions in so I can get my form right. This will have to be on the other side of Christmas, when I have some money …
/r/MarriedRedPill19/11/15 11:04 PM
1

I have no issues about pulling my weight or doing handiwork around the home. My problem is effective delegation. Thanks for the hot water tip, though. Never occurred to me the system might be broken. The likely culprit is the combination of off-peak heating, child-safe temperature and relatively long difference between tank and taps. But considering its size, leaks are worth investigating.
/r/askMRP17/11/15 06:15 AM
3

Keep taking more and more responsibility and passing shit tests. >Work harder than anyone because it is your ship. Not because you have to prove yourself, but because this is what the captain does, period. If anything, you take it slow because you know you fucked up, and need to get used to leading. But you lead, you take responsibility for everything, 100%., because that is what the captain does. Thanks for this perspective. Points taken. My phased approach has been ultimately about taking it s…
/r/askMRP17/11/15 05:57 AM
1

I restarted Stronglifts 5x5 with a focus on form What techniques are you using to acheive this? I'm in a similar position to you. Hit the gym for the first time last weekend and spent most of this week in a world of pain, I suspect, from poor squatting form. I need to stop apologizing. It's a habit. I say "sorry" about 20 times a day. It even irritates me. This is me also. Hard, isn't it? I'm following a "no apologies, ever" goal and am finding it particularly hard in less intimate situations, l…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/11/15 01:36 AM
3

Oh, and fucking delete your Tinder account. Also, this may or may not be an issue to you but any of your Facebook friends who has Tinder can see you have a Tinder account. I know someone who had to do some explaining after his wife was told about his account by a mutual friend.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/11/15 03:34 AM
1

download the stronglifts app, and start with the bar. 1 hour. Simple. There's an app for that. Of course there would be. Thanks for the tip.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/11/15 07:00 AM
2

Six weeks or so into this journey. Taking small, deliberate steps and seeing small but promising results. Have come to terms with the fact that I can't influence my wife directly and am focusing all my energy on me. If my relationship doesn't follow then I'll deal with it. Owning my health, not to increase my SMV but because it's my fucking body and it's the only one I've got. Have reached weight loss goal and for the first time in my life have begun a regime of daily exercise. Haven't hit the g…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/10/15 04:06 AM
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