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velvetcade Archive

View 0 posts and 50 comments by velvetcade on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

I have these hands too! Every time I get sad about them being so huge, Boyfriend reminds me that my big hands mean I'm getting a big rock for my engagement ring 😉 Who likes shiny things? Me!
/r/RedPillWomen03/12/20 08:12 AM
1

Thank you for this reminder! This is exactly why I want to get married: so that I can prioritize my husband over everyone else and not have to succumb to my toxic relationship with my parents. In their eyes, while I'm single, they "own" me. If I get married, ownership transfers to my husband. It sounds barbaric but it's the only way for me to shift relationship dynamics in a socially acceptable way.
/r/RedPillWomen05/10/20 04:34 PM
17

I love watching Korean housewives cleaning their homes on youtube. Haegreendal and Ivykitchen both have calm, quiet styles of filming. Little talking, lots of ASMR. You can tell that they put a lot of love and thought into their homemaking. ETA: Fairyland Cottage has some peaceful home living too. I like her voice and a lot of her sustainable living tips have been helpful to me.
/r/RedPillWomen05/10/20 04:22 PM
54

My parents were both in residency when they had me. I asked how they coped and they said: nannies! But no one younger than 62 ;) All joking aside, my mom (who is sitting beside me) said she never felt more in love with my dad than when they had me. So their marriage was "blissful" compared to the stress of training. I think they made their home a safe space for themselves, which is a really nice frame to keep yourself in. Also she said mental compartmentalization is key to having a happy home li…
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/20 04:17 AM
3

Honestly the only thing that's helped me has been antidepressants. I used to take them intermittently but now I just take them everyday because I couldn't handle the monthly adjustment and withdrawal symptoms. I've tried everything from herbal supplements to yoga. I used to be one of those girls that burst into hysterics once a month. It was getting really unmanageable, especially in the middle of med school.
/r/RedPillWomen16/05/20 04:31 PM
31

I think it's strange you've reached "cougar" status with a 2 year difference. Usually it's 10 years that warrants that title. My dad is 2 years younger than my mom and they met in their twenties too. In the long run, 2 years between them didn't make a difference because they were already in the same life stage. I think it's less age and really more about maturity level. My mom had 3 kids between ages 30 and 42.
/r/RedPillWomen10/11/18 11:57 PM
12

I grew up in circles not unlike those Singaporean ladies. A lot of my mannerisms were cultivated through years of ballet, studying in an expensive all-girls' school and modelling after the women in my family. There is a very strong cultural emphasis on delicacy and grace. Not everyone grows up that way, but a lot of the things I learned, I had to practice very hard at. I had to learn how to present myself meticulously, host gatherings, speak with confidence, and navigate the circles' insidious g…
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/18 01:15 PM
4

Oof. Tough love, but exactly what OP needs to hear.
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/18 12:47 PM
3

We have my cycles on our shared Google calendar. We're not ready for children yet, so seeing "shark week" on the calendar reassures him, and lets him know without me having to say so to be softer with me in the days leading up to it. If he asks about periods, I'll talk about the fascinating, gory details, but otherwise I don't really make a big deal out of it.
/r/RedPillWives22/08/18 11:58 PM
3

I'm happy to read that you recognize the role both your upbringing has on your current situation. Filipinas have it tough, because we're conditioned to be soft and submissive, but I think the trade-off has to be that we find a strong man who can lead and care for us. I'm your age, but I can't imagine putting up with my boyfriend just using me for money, food and sex. He holds me at the end of the day, talks to me, shares his dreams of his future with me, and involves me in his hobbies when he ca…
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/18 05:18 PM
3

One date couldn't hurt. I say go for it. He might have a lovely personality and have the qualities of a good captain. And if it doesn't work out, you'll know for sure that you have a height requirement and won't spend as much time vetting the next guy.
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/18 04:23 PM
62

I would personally have them removed, because me feeling like a 4 when I could be an 8 is going to wear on me in the long run, and the tattoos hold beliefs I no longer uphold. If you don't want to show your arms in the summer there are modest, heat-friendly clothing options out there.
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/18 02:33 PM
–

Hypergamy functions on the premise that women will always look for the best possible mate. When you're in love, all the positive traits of your object of affection are highlighted and the negative traits downplayed. In comparison, all other men don't measure up. So by attaining the best, you stop actively looking for other mates. Of course, love and relationships aren't static, so circumstances can change and you could fall out of love, or have your attraction to him decrease enough that you loo…
/r/RedPillWomen03/06/18 06:07 AM
3

My dad once commented that he loved the look of light colors and French tips on women's hands, because they made them look ladylike. He also thinks bright manicures are vulgar. So I follow that. But I love experimenting with colors so my toes are always vibrantly colored.
/r/RedPillWomen23/05/18 12:32 AM
2

I want a small Catholic wedding at a beautiful church with only family and a few friends. Introvert me does not appreciate large crowds LOL! If I'm going to splurge on anything, it would be on a photographer. Even if we decided to have a courthouse wedding, I'd still want to have a photographer.
/r/RedPillWives19/05/18 06:01 AM
1

This is a real possibility for me, so I'm saving your comment to look back on if it does happen. Thanks.
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/18 05:41 AM
2

Anyway, regardless of my slight feelings of impatience, annoyance, & “unsafe-ness,” I continued to let my husband lead. Relatable. This is a good reminder for me to practice STFU when my captain veers us into a strange path, physically and metaphorically. I'm glad RPW exists because I get to learn how to handle situations like this in a way that is sensitive to masculine and feminine natures, and to be grateful for the lessons they impart on us.
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/18 05:32 AM
1

This is inspiring me to increase mine too. and congrats!
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/18 11:36 AM
–

Forget about it, it's a non-issue at this point. Your partner might even start to wonder what other things you've lied about.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/18 02:36 AM
3

Yeah, OP. Don't torture yourself over it. Like he said, it just happens sometimes.
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/18 03:03 AM
3

I grew up in a traditional household where we valued service to the head of the family. If I married, I would care for my husband like I cared for my father, and a large part of that is submission and obedience. I'm someone who takes pleasure in following, so it's actually a great comfort to have someone else take the reins.
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/18 12:14 AM
2

Good luck! Your post has given my friend group ideas, so thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/18 11:35 PM
6

I think at this point, you know what you're supposed to do; you're just looking for people to validate that decision because it is difficult and painful. Marriage with this woman is not viable for the person you have become. An RPW is open and supportive, and she sounds anything but. This is not a healthy relationship. Get out. Now.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/18 01:30 PM
6

How attending to my own needs first has had an incredibly positive impact on how I deal with other people. I'm more optimistic, generous and secure, which makes me more attractive and more patient with short tempers.
/r/RedPillWives22/03/18 01:50 AM
17

I've had the baby voice issue before and am still at a loss on how to react to it that isn't, "Honey, you won't believe how fast I just dried up downstairs." LOL! I might just try this out, thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/18 11:56 PM
10

At the very least, I'll have blush and lip color when I leave the house! But I aspire my general look to be Olivia Palermo's levels of groomed. I'm very fastidious about grooming facial hair. My baseline is light makeup, softly curled hair, and an outfit that is modest but tasteful. I always have to smell nice and have a coat of clear polish on my nails. My feet should always have colored polish on so I can wear open-toed shoes anytime I like. I wear my drop pearl earrings and a slim leather wat…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/18 11:36 AM
3

I use a small notebook as a running list of things to do + daily reflections, a planner to track work stuff, and a calendar app to remind me of my appointments :) Using just a bullet journal wasn't the most efficient system for me, but it definitely motivated me to sit down and reflect, which helped me be more organized in the long run.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/18 02:03 PM
5

I've been trying to be more joyful and lighthearted too. I definitely see a change in the way my parents and my siblings treat me. My parents have been more lenient with curfews since they see me as trustworthy and emotionally stable. My siblings approach me more. I don't feel so stressed out over small things, and even manage to take joy in chores like cleaning, which snowballs into making my own life a little neater and healthier. Sometimes I feel like I have so much farther to go, but this po…
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/18 12:19 AM
3

This! ECE was my undergrad, it is SO useful because it basically teaches you how to mother well. You'll learn about developmental domains, how children learn, what words to use, how to manage them and what successful parenting looks like.
/r/RedPillWives04/03/18 12:17 AM
3

Read the comment, I felt it missed the point of the post.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 01:46 AM
2

He likes me in lighter, summery colors. Anything that looks comfortable and fresh. And sundresses, of course :p
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/18 12:35 AM
4

Posts like this motivate me so much!
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/18 12:21 AM
3

How wonderful! Thank you for sharing, I'm so happy for you!
/r/RedPillWives12/02/18 12:15 PM
10

My mother had my youngest brother at 42, and he was in fact the largest and healthiest baby out of all of us. I never felt that she struggled raising him, but I also acknowledge that we're upper-middle class in a culture where live-in childminders are the norm. I think that if you have the means to have a baby at 42, go ahead. I don't understand how it could be social suicide? Can you please clarify?
/r/RedPillWives04/02/18 12:29 AM
2

I can only speak for myself, but in my experience, the feminist stance being adopted currently by teens and young adults around me is one that condemns masculinity (any type of masculinity) and fosters anger and resentment against men because they're men. It glorifies female sexuality while shaming men for theirs, and disguises female empowerment for entitlement. So I see a lot of angry girls who aim to embody "fierce independence" but are deeply unhappy because boys don't want to date them.
/r/RedPillWives24/01/18 03:45 PM
9

I live in a country that is inherently RP. Many of my peers have been influenced by Western third-wave feminism, which emasculates their boyfriends and is culturally jarring. Reading insights and field reports here have only given me success in my relationship. By embracing my traditional femininity, I've encouraged the positive masculine traits in my partner to emerge, and our dynamic is one that is honest, loving, and free of conflict.
/r/RedPillWives11/01/18 01:03 PM
2

How wonderful, OP! Congratulations! Wishing you health and happiness in 2018!
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/17 04:15 PM
2

Me too! I love listening to those 5-minute mantras on youtube to start my day.
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/17 04:05 PM
10

Don't push! A man will marry when he's ready. He'll interpret you constantly bringing marriage up as nagging, and the more you nag, the more he'll dig his heels in, the less he'll want to marry you. He sounds like he's waiting for things to settle down before committing himself to marriage and family. You've only just moved in 5 months ago. You've been together almost three years and you sound like you have a great relationship. It could be heading to marriage naturally, provided nothing drastic…
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/17 04:04 PM
2

This is a very insightful post. I too have become very selective of what personal problems I tell my man, not because I have something to hide or because I'm ashamed, but because his reaction at failing to protect me can be dangerous for his health (neurological condition) and for others (he's very strong). I used to tell him everything, but now I reserve some of the more sensitive topics with my friends. Things like creepy catcalling, or body issues. My friends will be able to sympathize with m…
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/17 03:41 PM
2

Yikes. Relationships are about compromise, and some items in this list are irreversible (like your medical history or previous boyfriend count). Well, he's already laid his cards out on the table, OP. He'll never marry you, but some other lucky guy out there will. Don't put up with a man just using you as a placeholder until he encounters his standard of "wife material". Good luck and I'm sorry you had to go through this experience.
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/17 04:57 AM
3

Welcome!
/r/RedPillWives23/12/17 03:22 PM
5

Don't mention your exes to the next guy. Be wary of big age gaps, some guys target young women because it's easier to take advantage of them. If you want to attract guys who want to marry, take on the qualities of a girl who would be lovely to be married to (feminine, domestic, optimistic, responsible, etc)
/r/RedPillWomen21/12/17 01:40 PM
3

I'm learning how to knit! I've made a dishrag so far. Hopefully I'll be able to graduate to knitting my own blankets/shawls/socks. There's something about making my own things that's so rewarding. Must be tapping into that "nesting" instinct.
/r/RedPillWives13/12/17 07:30 AM
3

I just wanted to tell you that I empathize with you. I hopped on over to the relationships sub to see what they said. Most comments are saying to break up with him. I think just one other comment gave advice on how to stay with him. Your post has a very defeated tone to it—it's very clear on paper that you're unhappy with how things are. I think that if you can learn to be contented with your lifestyle now, which is in actuality very comfortable but passionless and a little lonely, then stay. Yo…
/r/RedPillWives09/12/17 09:16 AM
3

Unless your hyphenated name is something like Golden-Showers or Eaton-Cox (both real and very funny), I say go for it, if it feels right.
/r/RedPillWives09/12/17 08:39 AM
3

I agree! This is generally the effect feminine women have on men.
/r/RedPillWomen01/11/16 09:03 AM
8

Personally, I love pet names. My boyfriend is the kind of guy who regularly shifts between calling me babe, baby, sweetheart, sweetie, sugar, bee and love. I usually just call him babe or baby because I'm uncreative, and he dislikes "darling". Some men like pet names, some men don't. Just ask your SO.
/r/RedPillWomen24/09/16 12:49 PM
12

I've dated someone like Jim before. Eventually I realized that his lack of empathy for others extended to me as well. For all his brilliance, he was also arrogant, and he didn't love me for me, he was keeping me around because I was impressed and it made him feel impressive. I let him go because he was selfish, and selfish people don't make good Captains. If he keeps saying comments like these in public, you'll have to bite your tongue and pretend that his comments don't affect you. Don't fight …
/r/RedPillWomen04/07/16 09:32 AM
2

OP, don't feel pressured to rebel against your parents just because your boyfriend says so. He's a few years older, he's used to the freedom his financial situation, age (and maybe gender) allows. "Doing what you want" just because you're legal isn't necessarily the right thing. To your parents, it will come off as if you're selfish and feel entitled to things you haven't earned yet. You just started college, are dependent and haven't detached from your parents yet. Don't rush it.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/16 07:03 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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