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xoxobenji Archive

View 11 posts and 116 comments by xoxobenji on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

I think your summarized it perfectly. I can submit when everything is good but when things get hard like wedding planning or some major life event happens, that’s when I have a hard time really trust my SO and submitting.
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/22 12:05 AM
1

There really isn’t much info the falling out was due to my family and I not running things by my extending family and them not feeling included in the wedding planning process. They felt we should have involved them in every step as we were close growing up. However we as a family had started to distance ourselves because they are pretty toxic. They then confronted us and this got out of hand.
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/22 06:54 PM
5

This and every time we do this for each other we say “I love you more” and give the last bite. 🥰
/r/RedPillWomen03/07/22 01:31 AM
2

No I have not I have also not made it a thing where he has to pay. And if he pays for dinner then I always pay for the other stuff. I just didn’t like that fact that he basically put it all on me without even saying “hey babe can you get this” it was basically you’re getting this.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 11:06 PM
7

Why do I need to know how guys feel about having to pay when we literally go 50/50 lol
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 09:37 PM
1

Thank you commenting. For my it wasn’t about getting even or buying the dinner it was more so him saying “I guess you’re paying for the drink cause you wanted it” that’s what rubbed me the wrong way. I’ve paid for plenty of dinner as has he. But that comment just rubbed me wrong that’s all.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 06:12 PM
2

There no ring as of yet because in our culture there are 3 different engagements. We’ve done 2 and the 3rd one is in a couple of months and that’s when I’ll get the ring but he has officially asked for my hand from my parents. I agree about getting on the same page we usually are pretty good about communicating but this one little thing just really rubbed me the wrong way. But that’s also why I came here to see what others are advising because I know my perception of the situation can also be fl…
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 05:33 PM
5

Lol thank you for your response. It’s not that we can’t I was just asking on how hence my title. This isn’t a make it or break it kind of a thing. Sometimes I feel like other can verbalize things better than me because my emotions cloud my judgment.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 05:17 PM
3

We don’t live together so I can’t always cook and clean but when I can I do. And when he was in school I was helping write his essays. I help him in anyway he asks whether it be running errands or just trying to make his life easier.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 05:14 PM
4

Lol I’m paying for half the wedding.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 04:41 PM
2

I supported him through his academic career. Ive cooked and cleaned for him. I know it might not sound like it but I generally try to be a peaceful place for him. I support him emotionally and I usually allow him to lead our relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 03:58 PM
4

Lol how did you come to the conclusion that I don’t offer more to him then just sex? I sense a lot of projection in your response because nothing I wrote would indicate that i was considering my money to be mine and his money to be his. In fact it’s quiet the opposite I make sure to pay my fair share no matter what.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 03:37 PM
1

I agree! I do think we need to figure out a system that works for us.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 03:01 PM
3

Ok so I’ll go with your logic that because I invited him I should pay. Well then why is it when he invites me we split 50/50 according to your logic is that reasonable?
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 03:00 PM
0

Lol I’m not going to end my relationship over this. It was just something annoyed me that’s all.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 02:56 PM
-12

He’s definitely trying to save up for our wedding and hes also renovating his home at the moment so I know he’s would rather put the money towards that then spending it on a $200 dinner but I just didn’t like how he immediately said “we’ll I guess you’re paying for dinner” and then “your paying for the drinks because it was your idea” we both were on this date so if we usually do 50/50 then why wouldn’t we do the same here? When he suggests something I always go 50/50.
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 01:14 PM
1

In the beginning he used to wine and dine me as well but as the relationship progressed we shifted to 50/50 which I’m ok with. I know he’s currently is spending a lot of money on renovating his home and saving for our wedding so I get that $200 dinner might not the what he wanted but what got me was how he immediately jumped to your buying dinner and then your paying because you wanted this. I feel like if I were in his shoes I would have said I got the drinks don’t worry about it. But because h…
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/22 01:10 PM
23

I think it depends on how you’re saying it and when you’re saying it. When I first started dating my fiancé I just sat back and observed him. I never made my standards known or put any expectations on him because I wanted to see what kind of person he was and you know what he instinctively became the person I was looking to date. For example I never told him that I wanted to wait to have sex but he could tell I wasn’t ready and never pushed it. And we didn’t have sex until 4 months into our rela…
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/22 11:01 PM
5

Ooo this is definitely a tricky situation especially since your husband is having a hard time setting boundaries. What I would do is bring up the conversation in a very non confrontational way. Like “I love that we’re in Pakistan and we get to connect with our family again but I would love if we had some privacy to ourselves. I know the idea of sharing a common house and separate entered seem nice but I feel like I will always know the your parents are here so I won’t be able to be myself fully.…
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/22 01:57 AM
2

29 his sister is the only real issue in our relationship and even his family supports me because they know how she is.
/r/RedPillWomen25/12/21 07:39 PM
5

I agree with everything you said. I will never say anything about her from now and save those conversations for my best friend. Im just really wishing she was so drunk to recall the exact conversation so we can just not talk about this in the future lolll but either way lesson learned. 😊
/r/RedPillWomen25/12/21 07:21 PM
1

I think you might be focusing on the wrong thing. How is your relationship without the idea of marriage? Is this the type of person you want to be with for a long time? Raise children with? If so then marriage shouldn’t have any bearing on that. Will marriage change the kind of commitment you have for each other? For me, I know I want to be married and so does my SO but we both don’t want to right now and are ok with just dating. The thing that makes it hard is, we don’t live together but it’s n…
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/21 08:56 PM
1

Sometimes as men get deeper in their emotions they need the space to really process it and disconnect and then they come back stronger. So don’t freak out, you can see he’s still move forward with the relationship and you should just sit back and relax.
/r/RedPillWomen30/11/21 07:18 PM
1

I agree, I don’t want to come off as accusatory or make the situation worse than it actually is. But I guess what I’m grappling with is, how do you set a boundary of respect with someone? I shouldn’t have to demand respect because than it’s worthless, no? And if it’s not there naturally then why would I subject myself to that situation? Or do you think sometimes guys are just oblivious to the situation and need a little nudge?
/r/RedPillWomen29/11/21 06:15 PM
1

Thank you for your response! He did talk to her about it and why she had my name saved as that and she gave a lame excuse that she already had a friend by the same name as me and it was nothing personal. How would you suggest I talk to him about all of this? I’m having a hard time expressing myself because I don’t want to come from an aggressive place but more so of a place that I am hurt just don’t know how to tell him.
/r/RedPillWomen29/11/21 03:19 PM
0

Well if you look at it from your husbands point of view then you wouldn’t be the right person for him since you humiliated him in front of all those people. I’m not saying either situation is right but judging a relationship based on one incident isn’t right either. He’s been a wonderful partner for 4 yrs and this is the first time this has happened.
/r/RedPillWomen28/11/21 10:11 PM
2

That could be the case.
/r/RedPillWomen28/11/21 02:10 AM
1

I understand exactly what you’re saying but I wasn’t being sloppy at all if anything my brother was with me and he would have told me instantly. I was just genuinely laughing with everyone else and having a good time maybe being a little loud? But nothing that would be like omg what are you doing lol. I know he’s going through some really emotional stuff right now (unrelated to me) so he could just be on edge. This is the first time that this has happened.
/r/RedPillWomen28/11/21 02:09 AM
0

This is the first time something like this has happened with him. And he realized he made a huge mistake and has apologized for it as well. But yeah I couldn’t trust the sister with my kids.
/r/RedPillWomen28/11/21 02:04 AM
4

He’s actually really sweet and that’s why this is out of left field for me and really hurt me because I wasn’t expecting it. Yesterday was a pretty rough day for him, he was looking for his cousin all day who is homeless and a drug addict and finally was able to track him down. So maybe he was just on edge but I’m not sure.
/r/RedPillWomen27/11/21 04:58 PM
21

He said it was my laugh and the fact that I found every joke funny. Which is why I’m hurt like jeez I was having a good time, if he didn’t find him funny that it’s ok. Why ruin it for me?
/r/RedPillWomen27/11/21 04:34 PM
6

Wait what? You think to help your lying you need to lying again? I would just sit him down and fess up to everything you did and lied about and then let him know “I know I messed up and I am really sorry but I can’t keep going into circles like this. I’m telling you everything that has happened and I understand it might take some time to digest.” And then leave the ball in his court let him figure it out. You just sit back and really think about why you did all of this and maybe start going to t…
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/21 05:52 PM
1

Hahaha fine fine it’s my guilty pleasure BUT it definitely doesn’t help with aging 😭🤣
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/21 05:40 PM
1

This! I’m also a couple of months away from 30 and I can truly say I age like fine wine. I often get mistakes for being in my early twenties. I get ID when I go out for drinks or to buy alcohol even if I’m with my boyfriend who clearly looks his age (early 30s because of his beard) but I’m the most prettiest and put together now compared to any other stage.
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/21 09:39 AM
1

Lol my boyfriend would never say anything bad about me. He even confronted his sister yesterday about the weirdo thing. As far as Indian families having influence, that’s not that case as we both are very stubborn and tend to do things our way. If it where up to our parents we would have been married a long time ago.
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/21 02:06 AM
2

I think it told me because he wanted to know if anything took place for her to use that as a nickname. When he realized nothing happened that’s when he started to get annoyed.
/r/RedPillWomen18/10/21 02:01 AM
3

I agree! I know my boyfriend wasn’t too happy with her after but he definitely was very concerned for me and my feelings. Maybe the whole situation is weird for her and hence the name? Not sure lol
/r/RedPillWomen18/10/21 12:10 AM
1

Could be! And honestly if that’s the cause then I’m ok with that. I know it will take some time for her to accept me and really get to know me and I’m in no rush.
/r/RedPillWomen18/10/21 12:05 AM
1

Sorry for the confusion! We’re both Indian so we have had our pre-engagement. So in American standards he’s my fiancé but in Indian standards we’re just dating. That’s why I use them interchangeably. We’ve been dating for 3 yrs but just recently started to introduce each other to each other’s families. I get along great with everyone including his cousins. But again I’ve only met them 2 times.
/r/RedPillWomen17/10/21 09:49 PM
1

We both come from very conservative families that believe you should get married rather quickly and we both weren’t ready to be married. He was still in school while I was still establishing my career. But now we feel we’re ready and are not more open to meet each other’s families. Our siblings knew we were dating but we decided that we would only introduce each other once we were closer to getting married. Hope that answers your question! :)
/r/RedPillWomen17/10/21 09:19 PM
1

27!
/r/RedPillWomen17/10/21 08:08 PM
4

Thank you for your response! I’m definitely not going to respond but I will just keep it cordial. But also will not be going out of my way to include her. She’s 27 which is a couple of years younger than me. But we are definitely very different she’s a little nerdy and geeky which I actually found cute. I never tried to go over the top but if we were all having a conversation I would make sure to ask her a follow up question or if I got up to grab something I’d always ask if she needed anything.…
/r/RedPillWomen17/10/21 08:08 PM
2

I think it depends. When I first started talking to my SO I never texted him first, not because I was playing a mind game but because I wanted to give him space and not feel pressured. On the flip side he was talking to another girl who ruined her chances by texting too much and having high expectations.
/r/RedPillWomen12/10/21 12:00 PM
7

Sir if that’s who you are getting your viewpoint from than I suggest you rethink youre whole ideology. He only preys on fragile men and now I can see exactly where you’re coming from. Let me guess; were you a beta who turned to him and now feel you’re an alpha because of it? Cause listen honey no alpha is going to turn to another man for advice either you got it or you don’t and I’m starting to see you just don’t and now it’s making sense why you want to continuously argue your view point cause …
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/21 05:04 AM
6

You think a HV man is anyone that makes over $100k and men want to be him and women want to date him? LOL a HV man aka captain is someone who is a leader not only in his life but also in his relationship; a man who always puts his partner and family first. Someone who is a provider so yes $100k would help with that. He also has a vision for you and him for the future. He is caring and nurturing in his own masculine way. He has confidence in himself and his decisions. He is kind to everyone inclu…
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/21 04:10 AM
5

Lol can I ask you something? Why are you so invested in disproving my observation and experience? If I as a woman am saying I deem something to be HV in a man or I know men that are HV how can YOU (a man)tell me that that isn’t the case? Is HV in the opposite sex (ex: men) not determined by it’s opposite sex (ex: women) and Vice verse?
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/21 03:55 AM
11

Lol any HV guy I’ve been with or have known would never call himself HV unless he was actually a player who wants me to think he’s HV and wanted and if you know anything about RPW then you know that’s not the kind of men us women want around here. Also nor would any HV guy spend time trying to correct me THEY would careless. So although you might “close the deal” you my friend aren’t HV probably more like a player.
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/21 03:43 AM
6

They are high value (good jobs, drive nice cars, family oriented and are extremely good looking) I’ve seen multiple girls hitting on them while we’ve gone out and they just curve them all. They’ve always respected me and have never let me pay for anything. I think men who have discipline and know the type of partner they want they really don’t waste time with girls just to get laid.
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/21 03:23 AM
12

Wow I am just shocked at these comments. I know multiple men who are every close to me that are either virgins or only have sex when in a committed relationship. There are many factors for this but the main one they spoke of is the fear of catching a disease. I think just like we expect us women to vet a man, the men also vet us women. Also many of these men make good money so they also are afraid that a girl will “trap” them and they will have to deal with the consequences for at least 18 years…
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/21 02:59 AM
3

For me the word captain doesn’t necessarily mean that he is always in charge and I have to bow down to him. It’s more of a respect, I respect my man. I take his opinion into consideration, I discuss important things in my life like financial goals, moving jobs, navigating relationships, and so much more. As does he, I don’t try to belittle him or go on a power trip it’s a very loving and caring relationship. However I was not this way with my ex only because he wasn’t captain material. So id you…
/r/RedPillWomen09/07/21 10:18 PM
1

Yayyyyyy! Don’t worry about the 10 pound weight gain is probably water weight. Just focus on your self. Remember you were his crush at some point and you where too good for him. Get back to that level of confidence and physical attractiveness.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/21 08:17 PM
10

This^ take this advice OP. You’re hung up on him while he is taking his time building himself. He knows if things don’t work out with you than he can easily replace you. What are you doing to improve yourself? And why are you chasing a man? You need to let this man go because 2 thing will happen; either he’ll realize he loves you and will step up or you’ll find a better man that treats you right.
/r/RedPillWomen20/06/21 05:00 PM
3

Lol women can balance behind career driven and feminine. I’m very competitive at work because I work in finance but I’m very feminine with my SO. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/21 10:53 PM
5

Clearly you haven’t had good sex. But with that being said. You should have sex when you’re ready and with someone that you love and feel connected to. Also don’t use sex as some kind of power trip over your man. Because you will always lose. Sex is about connecting and just a different form of express the love you have for each other.
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/21 03:27 PM
1

Love this!
/r/RedPillWomen25/12/20 10:13 PM
5

I know I could post this on r/relationship_advice and majority of them would side with me. But that’s not how want my relationship to be. But do I not have a right to be frustrated with his lack of communication?
/r/RedPillWomen27/10/20 08:17 PM
6

This is something I struggle with, I’m just sure how to be feminine when I comes to work. I feel Like a word vomit and am super expressive with my opinions no matter what it is. But it’s only at work I’m not like that with my SO. And idk how to stop.
/r/RedPillWomen26/10/20 12:31 AM
3

Quick question; why do you feel stuck? If it’s your husband that’s not motivated to work? From personal experience I can tell you I am way more motivated to climb the corporate latter than my SO. He really don’t care to get raises or a higher position. Where as I am super motivated to keep getting promoted. He actually doesn’t like that I’m such a workaholic but it’s just who I am. Lol
/r/RedPillWomen11/10/20 04:06 AM
4

First of all you need to chill. Right now you’re in the mind set of trying to get him and that’s honestly not a healthy mind set to be in. Guys don’t want girls that are throwing themselves on to them. If he’s talking to other girls then I suggest you talk to other guys get to see what’s out there. If he likes you he will step up and court you.
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/20 04:52 PM
7

Don’t really care. If he watches it he’ll usually tell me but even if he didn’t it wouldn’t really matter to me. Now if he’s into some really really out there stuff then maybe it might be an issue.
/r/RedPillWomen01/09/20 11:52 AM
33

Not going to lie,I’ve gotten free stuff. But I don’t think it’s because of my outfit, I naturally am a feminine woman. Some of the free things I’ve gotten are; free desserts, extra wine at a wine tastings and discounts. None of which I have asked for they all were just given to me by random men.
/r/RedPillWomen28/07/20 04:40 AM
3

I used to do this A LOT in the beginning because I didn’t want to seem over bearing. Even when I would see my SO stressed I would just distance my self and try to let him process it himself. When in fact he needed me there the most. Now if I see something I ask him I don’t force him to tell me but I’ll ask him if he’s ok and now he tells when any little stressor he has. But I agree with others it’s the way you approach these topics.
/r/RedPillWomen18/07/20 02:53 AM
5

Here’s my take on this, you’re basically letting your husband control all aspects of your life. Do you make your own money? If so I would start contributing a little to your own account as play money that way you are able to do things that you want. Stop looking to your husband to be a certain way to make you happy, happiness starts with in annnnd you also have to stop being hyper focused on his negatives. If all you ever see is him in a negative light then that’s all you’ll ever get from him. S…
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/20 05:49 AM
1

But why are you making something that happened to her about you? I get it you would react differently but she’s a complete different person from you who has different experiences and to hold something like this over her head is wrong. You’re not a woman so you won’t understand how a woman should react in this situation.
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/20 03:22 AM
2

You can give him a hand job? But if I were you I would work on the “bj is a slutty thing.”Because it’s not for me it’s about showing my partner that I love every aspect of him. Plus the look they give you when you’re going down on them is priceless.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/20 03:08 PM
6

Question: what would make you feel like she liked it? Was it because she didn’t make a huge fuss about it? Even though she verbalized her boundaries numerous times.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/20 02:06 AM
23

Ok the first thing that stood out to me was you’re 26 and your man is 22 that in its self produces a lot of issues because you’re maturity is on different levels and that could not be more clear in this whole situation. A guy being handsy with you is not your fault yet your boyfriend made the whole situation about himself because he was feeling insecure? You need to leave him. Not once did he ask you how you felt instead he was worried about his fragile masculinity.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/20 01:39 AM
14

There’s a lot going on in your post. You say you were off and on the first year maybe that’s why he feels like it’s too soon? Guys like to test relationship out not in a bad way but just to see if it will last. For example my boyfriend just recently started to tell his family about me even though we’ve been dating for 2 years and I completely understand that it takes time to vet a potential spouse. Also are you withholding sex because you feel like it will give you more power or an upper hand th…
/r/RedPillWomen16/05/20 02:51 PM
11

Perfect! Start focusing on yourself and I promise you either he will step up or you will end up finding someone better!
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/20 06:15 PM
26

You need to chill. Your need clinging behavior is cause him to go back and forth. For now just work in your self if not for this man then another. And stop reaching out to him all the time let him reach out to you. Men take awhile to process their feelings.
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/20 05:29 PM
1

Yes! :)
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/20 03:49 AM
1

I understand but again that’s something you have to TALK to your SO about not something you just tell them. Communicate how you feel and why it’s important to you. Maybe he’ll gain more respect for you but you can’t just tell them you are changing the rules of the relationship because it doesn’t work like that and will only cause issues in the future. Today it’s changing views on a sex tomorrow it can be some other major issue but you have to communicate with each other not dictate!
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/20 03:45 AM
1

But why did you not think of this before hand is the question? Why are you all of a sudden realizing having premarital sex and moving in with your SO is a problem? I come from a traditional family as well, my parents would not be ok with me moving in with a man before marriage but I let that be known in the beginning stages of my relationship. Also if your man isn’t all that interested in sex to beginning with then why bring it up? Especially since you say your the one to initiate why would you …
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/20 03:39 AM
1

All I hear is excuses tbh. You decided to do that for him that’s on you he didn’t force your hand like you are forcing his. And you didn’t say you’re doing this because of COVID 19 you’re doing it because of how your parents will feel. I still stand with my analysis...you were willing to go against your culture and parents to get the guy but now that you feel secure in having him you want to flip on him.
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/20 03:31 AM
1

Why was this not something you thought about before getting into a relationship with this man? Now that you are about to make a major commitment you all of a sudden change how you want to go about the relationship? So you had no problem having sex to obtain him but now that you know you have you you don’t want to continue the sex? Same thing with the moving in? All of this should have been discussed with your SO. You should have talked to him and let him know how you are feeling instead of just …
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/20 03:18 AM
14

Why is she not appreciative of the MIL making her dinner? Maybe she can work out a schedule with her, like every Thursday the MIL can send over food?
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/20 02:35 PM
17

Look if you think you’re unattractive then that’s the vibe you are putting out. Plus you yourself stated that you don’t like going to bars and you’re not religious that in it self limits your dating pool. So maybe it’s not that you’re not attractive but maybe just a smaller groups of men you would be more compatible with?
/r/RedPillWomen21/04/20 04:30 PM
0

How did you even find out that he was liking this girls pics? Because ig removed the feature where you were able to see what others liked a long time ago. If I were you i wouldn’t bring it up the way you want to instead I would probably take a similar picture and send it to him and when he asked why you sent it randomly then I would bring up that I saw you like that girls pic thought you were into stuff like that. That’ll either get him to tell you he in fact does like that and you can satisfy t…
/r/RedPillWomen20/04/20 08:13 PM
2

You can be a feminist and still be feminine. All feminism is, is wanting women to have to same rights and treatment as men. You don’t have to act like a man or do things like a man. One way I cultivate my feminism especially during quarantine is making sure I look nice. I don’t have to wear make up or anything but I make sure I have nice lounge wear, have my hair and nails done. (At home of course) I’ve been watch a lot of food network and learning how to make fancy meals at home. I’ve also been…
/r/RedPillWomen18/04/20 12:00 AM
5

Through my sister in law. She knew his cousin and saw a picture of him and thought we’d look good together. Lol it was weird at first because i wasnt looking and it felt kinda arranged but after the first couple of months our relationship really started to flourish.
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 03:20 AM
4

What if that’s one of your spouses love languages? I feel like you’re looking at this from a I’m not in the mood but still have to do it. Where we all are looking at it from this is how he expresses love.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/20 01:48 PM
1

Whoaaa you coming off as too much. First of all it’s only been 7 weeks there can be so many reasons as too why hes silent ie stress from work or what’s going on in the world? Maybe he’s pacing the relationship? Maybe he’s starting to feel comfortable and there fore going back to what’s normal in terms of his communication. As you can see there are plethora of reason but at this point you should be vetting him not trying to get his attention. You should be using this time to see what you really l…
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/20 01:43 PM
27

When their actions meet their words. Ex: he talks about the future but does he talk about a time line? Is actively pursuing that time line. (Without you pushing him about it) another ex: does he reach out to you? Check up on you? (This one is a little tricky because people sometimes get busy BUT just look at it overall. If you’re the one constantly texting and calling him then he’s not available)
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/20 02:01 PM
2

I just found her and I’m so sad she’s gone 😭
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/20 05:58 AM
3

I’m in my mid to late 20s and he’s in his early 30s. I’m not trying to make him put in work. I think in my previous relationship we had a dynamic where if I was too available he would back off. And I might have brought that into my now relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/20 04:12 AM
8

When you start seeing him consistently invest in the relationship. Does he check up on you often? Does he take you out on dates? Does he want to get to know you not only the basic stuff but the real deep stuff? Does he talk about the future? If you see him do this over the course of several months. (Key word several) then I was start taking the relationship to the next level. If not then hold off.
/r/RedPillWomen19/03/20 11:03 AM
16

He didn’t lead you on. He just knows he can’t be your captain right now. His first priority is his career, finical stability and then you m. If I were you I would let him figure himself out. And be a good friend for now.
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/20 04:18 PM
7

You’re basically on the back burner at this point. He obviously enjoys the attention you’re giving him but he has shown you he is not interested. So move on. He might come back and start initiating more conversation but it would only be to boost his ego and know that he still has a grip on you. I don’t know why he’s not interested but all I can say is if a person doesn’t realize my value with in the first couple of weeks I’d move on and find someone that would. And stop initiating with men. In t…
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/20 01:29 PM
5

It sounds like he’s taking it slow. Especially since it seems like you guys just started “dating” in December. So you’ve only been together for 1 month. In that case treat this like a new relationship. 1 month is too soon to take the relationship any further then it already is. Also you already know he has baggage from past relationships as he gets to know you more and see how different you are from other women that baggage will slowly go away. Also don’t bring up any sort of talk. If he hasnt m…
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/20 03:48 PM
11

A few questions, you said you’ve been talking for 5 months and just started dating. What exactly does that mean? Was he asking you out and you refused? Or did he just one day after talking for 5 months ask you out? How often do you talk? Does he ever bring up things like “next summer let’s do this”. Does he ever talk about meeting his friends or family? You also mentioned that he’s a captain in other ways, could you give examples?
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/20 01:48 AM
2

I agree! There is no need to attack because that’ll further break down the relationship. But getting help is as simple as “hey babe I’m going to go hang out or have lunch with my mom, I’m leaving the kiddo at home. I’ll see you in a little bit” and kiss him goodbye. Theres no drama no attacking.
/r/RedPillWomen02/02/20 08:47 PM
7

I think that’s a start. List out your needs then leave the ball in his court. Also you need to start putting yourself first. Do you see how he always puts himself before you or your sick child? You need to do the same. Stop waiting for him to make you a priority. Do things for yourself, if you need a day off leave your child with him and go. It’s his kid too and it’ll force him to take the parent roll.
/r/RedPillWomen02/02/20 08:30 PM
28

Just reading your post is making me frustrated. Redpill isn’t about being a doormat. If your husband isn’t fulfilling his duties as a husband and father, then you should stop doing yours. You stated you have tried talking, nagging, and giving as much as you can. Maybe now you should just let him see the consequences of his actions by not being so giving and not bending over backwards for him.
/r/RedPillWomen02/02/20 07:34 PM
2

I used to be really shy but once I realized he loved when I made eye contact while going down on him. I now do it all the time. And he loves it.
/r/RedPillWomen31/01/20 12:06 AM
1

I agree! That’s why I haven’t demanded it just yet. We’ve only been dating a little over a year but I really miss the amount of attention I used to get but ever since I started my job 3 months ago it seems like the his attention has lessened. It could be because he does not like me working or maybe he’s just really busy with work.
/r/RedPillWomen23/01/20 03:47 AM
3

Nope it doesn’t , it grows back like it originally was. But I can definitely a difference with how my makeup looks when I dont do it for a week or two.
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/20 01:49 PM
5

Oh boy there are so many...without stating the obvious such as showers and brushing your teeth. I always like to have my hair curled, manis and pendis. I shave my face once’s a week (it helps the makeup look nice) I exfoliate couple of times a week. I wear cute bras and panties just so I can feel sexy lol
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/20 06:40 AM
6

Ok so let me get this straight you’re following a woman that only has guys come around and do chores for her? Did she tell you about the type of connection she has with these men? Is it loving, caring and even intimate at all? The men she is attracting probably have some sort of kink of being dominated or treated like shit. Because no Captain would fall for this behavior a high value man would have plenty of women willing to put out especially if the women are low value. What you need to focus o…
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/20 03:06 PM
24

Wowwww yeah you need to ditch him. I don’t mind if someone I was dating commented on how pretty a girl is but it’s a different thing when someone says they would want me and other girls.
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/20 05:44 AM
1

I read your comment early this morning as I was getting ready to work out and I have been mulling over it since and I agree! I have to see the bigger picture because this will ultimately effect my children. So thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/20 07:48 PM
3

Thank you! I really appreciate you insight. And I agree with everything you stated! 🥰
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/20 07:47 PM
1

I have not but will definitely take that quiz!
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/20 02:05 PM
1

Agreed! The more I think about it, the more I realize he really is a good guy. He has actively participated in my favorite activity while I have only resisted his.
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/20 06:11 AM
1

Have a good new year booboo. I hope you find happiness cause you sound like a sad mf.
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/20 05:55 AM
2

Lol I literally just told you about an activity (reading) which I enjoy. He has gone as far as reading a series I enjoyed. You’re first comment was way more insightful. Do I personally agree with everything this sub says NO but I also don’t go around calling people morons if our opinion differs.
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/20 05:54 AM
1

True...But he would be happy if I just worked out at home.
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/20 05:47 AM
3

So true!
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/20 05:35 AM
3

He actually has. I love to read and he started reading.
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/20 05:34 AM
2

Exactly! During the recession my dad lost his good paying job and wasn’t able to get another job for some time. If my mother hadn’t been working we would have been homeless. She stepped up financially and took care of the family. Now they both work together to rebuild everything we lost.
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/19 06:35 PM
2

I agree! I personally think it’s fine to be career oriented for a woman but still follow semi traditional rules in the home. For example I work (a lot more than my s/o would like me to but we are not married and I want to save as much as possible until we do get married and decide to have a family) however once I’m married I’ll still work but just not as much a lot of the decisions are and will be made by him and minimal input from me because I trust his leadership. I chose a man that I know I c…
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/19 02:47 AM
4

Read carefully I said IF the MAN decides to divorce you. And it’s not a competition between your husband it’s called being financially secure. Also with today’s times a 1 income household is very uncommon thing, because of the cost of living. The downfall of our society can not be solely blamed on feminism. There are many contributing factors. But we as a society need to find a balance and not just romanticize about the olden days because those are long gone.
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/19 01:34 AM
3

What happens if she does decide to follow her spouses plan, has children, leave her career or take up a small job and he decides he wants to leave her one day. What does she do then? I’m all for being traditional but in the 50s no matter how unhealthy or unsatisfying your marriage was you made it work because divorce was frowned upon. Now a days divorce is accepted so if a woman were to only follow traditional values then she would be a fool. However I do think a woman should have a balance , sh…
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/19 12:42 AM
8

Why does everyone here blame feminism for their mistakes. Feminism did not make you sleep with people. You’re unhappy because you haven’t found the perfect balance between being feminine and masculine. Your mom did every thing that you aspire to do but yet she was still unhappy. It has nothing to do with feminism and everything to do with you. There are many times when you need to be the dominate person in your life (not relationship) for example work but their are many times when you need to be…
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/19 04:19 AM
7

I personally think this is normal. When you spend so much time with someone (8-9 hrs/ a day) you begin to get to know them to a certain extent. And that what you have to remind your self you only know the good, well behaved version of him and that’s what you like. You’re husband sounds amazing I would never hurt someone’s feeling how is that understanding and loving but again that’s me.
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/19 03:56 AM
46

I probably watch more porn than my guy. 🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/RedPillWomen06/12/19 06:01 PM
5

Giving him space is the best thing you can do. He probably needs to time process everything especially the losing his virginity. If and when he comes back just be nice and sweet. Also pull your emotions back you don’t want to get overly invested in something and then it turns out the guy is a douche bag.
/r/RedPillWomen29/11/19 08:27 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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